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- [00:00]
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Hello and welcome to Storytime for Grown Ups. I'm Faith Moore and this season we're reading David Copperfield by Charles Dickens. Each episode I'll read a few chapters from the book, pausing from time to time to give brief explanations so it's easier to follow along. It's like an audiobook with built in notes. So brew a pot of tea, find a cozy chair and settle in. It's story time. Hi everyone.
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Welcome back. You know it's June. I forgot to say that on Monday. Monday was June 1st, but here we are in June. It's summer. It's summer vacation for a lot of you, I bet. I bet some of your kids are already done with school.
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School.
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Mine are still in school, but in just a couple of weeks it will be summer vacation for us as well. So I hope you're enjoying that. I hope you're getting some nice weather. And it's funny to not be talking about summer session. It's funny to not be saying we're about to be going into this whole other thing and once a week and all of that. We're not. We're still here. We're right in it. We are very much in David Copperfield, very much in this book. And we're keeping going. We're going to be going all the way until August 20th. That's going to be our conclusion episode where we've already finished the book, but we just wrap everything up. August 17th, by my current calculations is going to be the final episode of the book. So chapter 64 is the last chapter of this book. So we're getting there. We've got, you know, three months, two and a half months or so left. But we are not done. We are sticking with it. So last time was a really long chapter and there was a lot going on in it. And so I have a lot to talk about here at the beginning. This coming up chapter, chapter 43 is a bit shorter so it's all going to even out. But we have a bit of a longer intro today and so let's just try to get right to it. Just don't forget all the usual things. Please subscribe to the show. Please tap the five stars if you're enjoying the show. Those are right there in your podcast play player also. And you're a podcast player. If you haven't yet done this and you're enjoying this show, please leave a positive review. It just really helps other people to find the show. I don't know how it works. It's some sort of magical algorithm that I don't understand, but it does work. I've seen it happen. So the more reviews and the more five star reviews a show gets, the more likely it becomes that people are going to see it in their podcast player as something that's being recommended to them. And that's wonderful because we want more people, because the more people, the merrier and also the more people, the longer we get to keep doing this show. So please do do that. Tell your friends about the show, scroll into the show notes and check out all the various links that are there. You can buy some merch, you can join our online community, you can just leave a donation. All of those things really, really help the show. It really helps it to grow and it really helps it to be able to continue. So thank you. And of course, listening helps the show in all kinds of ways. So thank you for being here. It's the most important thing that you can do. So thank you for being here and for listening. And I'm really excited to keep going with today. David Copperfield with you. It's so lovely to still be right in the middle of the book now. So last time was chapter 42. Today is going to be chapter 43. So let's just remind ourselves of what happened. There was a lot, as I said, so there's a lot going on. So let's remind ourselves and then we'll talk for a bit. So here is the recap. Okay, so where we left off.
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Agnes and Mr. Wickfield come to London
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to visit Dr. Strong, and Uriah and his mother come along with them.
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Uriah tells David that he's come because he's worried about agnes's friendship with Mrs. Strong. He feels that Mrs. Strong will advise Agnes not to marry someone as humble as Uriah.
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David is disgusted with Uriah, as usual, and leaves him as soon as he can.
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He arranges for Agnes to meet Dora and he's very concerned that they like each other. Dora is at first nervous around Agnes,
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but eventually relaxes when she sees how kind Agnes is.
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But Dora can also clearly see that Agnes is an admirable woman. And she's clearly worried that David might
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prefer Agnes to her, though David doesn't really pick up on that.
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Agnes and Dora agree to write to each other and on the way home, Agnes tells David that she approves of Dora and knows he'll take care of her because she needs taking care of.
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As Agnes is leaving to go into
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the Strong's house, she assures David that she'll never marry Uriah Heep. David is about to go home when
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he sees the light on in Dr. Strong's study and he goes in to say goodnight.
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Instead, he finds Uriah, Dr. Strong and Mr. Wickfield all looking very upset. It turns out that Uriah has just revealed to Dr. Strong that Ms. Strong
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has an improper attachment to Jack Malden.
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Uriah then forces Mr. Wickfield to say that he was worried about this too
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and then says that David has also thought this.
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And while David doesn't admit it, he
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knows that Dr. Strong can see the
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truth of that on his face. Dr. Strong is devastated and blames himself for marrying a woman so much younger than him and not allowing her to marry for love.
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Instead, his only concern now is to
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protect her from people's bad opinion of her and to hope to die soon so that she can marry again. David is so angry with uriah that when Dr. Strong and Mr. Wickfield leave the room, David smacks him in the face. Uriah pretends that he forgives David for
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this and that he's always been a friend to him, which upsets David even more.
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As time goes by, David sees that Mrs. Strong is becoming more and more
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unhappy as she realizes that something has
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changed in her relationship with Dr. Strong. The only redeeming thing is Mr. Dick's
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visits because he walks with the doctor and gardens with Annie and they both enjoy his company.
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At the very end of the chapter, David gets a letter from Mrs. Macawer saying that something has changed about Mr.
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Macawer and he has now very secretive
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and spends all his time at the office where he works for Uriah. David writes back that she should be patient and kind and try to win
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him back that way.
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But David tells us that the letter made him think a great deal.
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Okay, I'm going to read 4 comments today. The first one comes from Julianne. She says chapter 42 obviously put more emphasis on the drama with the Strongs,
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but it began with possibly the saddest moment in the book. Dora may be silly and ridiculous, but
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not to the extent she lacks self awareness.
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Her meeting Agnes seemed to make her suddenly realize just how lacking she is.
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And I really wish she could have known Agnes as a child.
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As a positive influence. Dora seems to know she will be a hopeless wife, though she also seems
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unwilling to try to improve her chances. Dora also joins the list of characters
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who notice the compatibility between David and Agnes. And I wouldn't be surprised if she was jealous. It only adds to her pitiful state. This next one comes from Emily McGuire. She says what a heart Wrenching chapter.
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I am so glad that Uriah got a good smack.
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Finally, David took some action.
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I would have liked to reach into the pages of the book myself and slap Uriah if I could. I found Dr. Strong's commitment to Mrs. Strong and desire for her all over
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well being, whether or not that includes him, so striking. In contrast to seeing David and Dora
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earlier in this chapter and thus far
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in the book, though I particularly like
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Dora and find her somewhat unbearable at times, Dr. Strong really gives a good example of what a sacrificial husband ought
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to be for his wife. I hope David takes it to heart with whoever he marries.
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The third one comes from our online community which is called the Drawing Room. And this person goes by the handle arymm. She says if anyone still has a
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hint of sympathy for Uriah Heep after
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this episode, well, I don't know what to say. Being a self made man and scrapping for social mobility is one thing.
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Trying to destroy a young woman because
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she might badmouth you to your crush is another. He's without principle or compassion. And the last one also comes from our online community. This person goes by the handle Onny.
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She says Uriah has caused damage, but he doesn't have the power he thinks he does. Not when good people remain steadfast to virtue.
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And isn't that what Agnes believes and says to David?
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She believes that truth and justice will prevail in the end. She trusts that if she does what
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she knows to be right, things will work out okay. So yes, we have a lot to talk about about Chapter 42, but I think there are essentially two broad topics. One is Dora meeting Agnes and what that tells us about Dora and possibly also about Agnes. And the other is Uriah and what he does to the strongs. So let's just begin with Dora because we talked a lot about her last time and I think this is a good follow up to that conversation. So as Julianne says in her letter,
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we get this insight into Dora in
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this chapter that we haven't really had before, although I think it was there, just not as overtly. And it's what I was trying to put forward last time. And the insight is that Dora is worried that she isn't good enough to be David's wife. We've been talking for a while now about whether Dora is manipulative, right? Whether she's actively kind of freeloading off of everyone around her, making everyone do things that are actually her job to do and expecting people to. To wait on her hand and foot and all of this. So is she that or is she just totally clueless? Does she want to learn how to cook, but she literally can't figure it out? Does she want to learn how to keep the accounts, but she literally doesn't know enough math to make it work? And I think in this chapter we get the sense that it's the latter. The second thing that she wants to do what David is asking her to do, but she really doesn't know how and at least feels like she can't learn how to. And of course, all of this comes to a head in comparison to Agnes, because so much of Dora and Dora's story happens, at least for us, although not for David, but we see so much of Dora's story in relation to Agnes. I haven't gotten a single letter saying that Dora is actually a good choice of a wife for David, and I've gotten tons of letters saying that Agnes would be a much better choice. So I think that it's accurate to say that we at least are holding Agnes up as the perfect wife candidate for David, and we're finding Dora lacking. And so it makes sense that we would begin to see Dora's self doubt cropping up at the moment when she finally gets to meet Agnes. And I think there are basically two different things going on here for Dora. And both of them, at least to my mind, make Dora a much more sympathetic character. The first is that Dora is just worried that Agnes won't like her. She sees that Agnes is David's best friend and his sister and that her opinion means more to David than anyone else's opinion. And she's worried that Agnes won't like her, and she's worried about what that would mean for her relationship with David. David tells us. Here's a quote. Dora was afraid of Agnes.
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She had told me that she knew Agnes was too clever, but when she saw her looking at once so cheerful and so earnest and so thoughtful and so good, she gave a faint little cry of pleased surprise and just put her affectionate arms around Agnes's neck and laid her innocent cheek against her face.
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Okay, so on the one hand, David's praise of Agnes has set Agnes up in Dora's mind as this kind of imposing figure, someone who won't like Dora because Dora is silly and childish. Which again speaks to the fact that Dora knows she is silly and childish, but feels that she can't help it. But of course, Agnes isn't imposing or scary. She's wonderful. And in her wonderfulness, she sees sees this little childish Shy, nervous girl and immediately puts her at her ease, which
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is both good for Dora.
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Agnes isn't going to go badmouthing Dora to David and potentially make him not
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want to marry her.
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But for us, the reader, it also tips the scales even more in Agnes's favor because we see how kind and thoughtful Agnes is and how sweet she is to this little sort of childish person. And here's what David says. He says the gentle cheerfulness of Agnes
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went to all their hearts. Her quiet interest in everything that interested Dora, her manner of making acquaintance with Gyp, who responded instantly. Her pleasant way when Dora was ashamed
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to come over to her usual seat by me, her modest grace and ease
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eliciting a crowd of blushing little marks of confidence from Dora, seemed to make our circle quite complete.
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Okay, so on the one hand, Dora feels better and likes Agnes very much. Now, on the other hand, we are like, trying to crawl into the book so we can shake David and yell at him to wake up and see what a wonderful woman Agnes is and to get out of this relationship with Dora before they're actually married and it's all too late. It's so brilliant, I think it's brilliant that the very thing that makes Dora
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feel more comfortable with Agnes is the
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thing that makes it even clearer that Agnes is the better person.
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But.
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But the second thing that happens when Dora meets Agnes is, as Julianne says, that Dora becomes another one of the people in the story who think that perhaps Agnes would make a better wife for David. Which again tells us that Dora feels insecure about the way that she is. She isn't, like, reveling in her spoiled bratedness. She's embarrassed by it. She knows there's something lacking in her, some essentially adult, womanly thing that she can immediately see that Agnes has and that she doesn't know how to achieve for herself. She says, don't you think if I
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had had her for a friend a
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long time ago, Dodie, I might have been more clever? Perhaps. So she knows that she doesn't measure up, and she begins to wonder why David isn't in love with Agnes and wanting to marry Agnes instead of her. And again, I think that speaks well of her and it makes me much more sympathetic to her.
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I.
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And I love this little line where she just says, I have forgotten what relation Agnes is to you, you dear bad boy.
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Right.
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She's trying to figure out if Agnes and David could get married or if they're too closely related. Like, obviously, David couldn't marry his actual sister, so Dora is Trying to see if there's any possibility that David could marry her. And she finds out that, in fact, yes, there is nothing stopping them from getting married if they wanted to, because they're actually not related by blood at all. But David doesn't actually understand any of this, right? This whole thought process of Dora's, all her insecurities about whether David might prefer to marry Agnes, he doesn't understand any of that because David never once imagines that he might marry Agnes. He doesn't even think about it. She's his beloved sister, his best friend, not a potential love interest. But I know, and I know that many of you have written to me to say something similar to this, but it does kind of seem like the thing that Agnes is to David, the way that he views her and the way that he feels. Feels about her, it does kind of seem a lot like romantic love. It's just that David doesn't see it that way at all. And he's obviously also incredibly infatuated with Dora. He does love Dora in some way, but he also seems to love Agnes but not know it. Okay, so listen to what he says about Agnes's reaction to Dora. He says, never, never had I loved
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Dora so deeply and truly as I loved her.
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That night, when we had again alighted
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and were walking in the starlight along the quiet road that led to the
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doctor's house, I told Agnes it was her doing. Okay? So the fact that Agnes approves of Dora makes David love Dora more. It's like David loves the things that Agnes loves because Agnes loves them, or something like that. I mean, he might feel this way if his. Like, if his family approved of his future wife, if he really valued his family's opinion. But this keeps happening over and over again. The things that Agnes thinks and feels and her advice to David and her way of being, they all seem to infuse David with a sense of calm, of rightness, of certainty, of peace. She is like his guiding star, his good angel.
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Right?
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And it's hard not to associate those feelings with romantic love when the person they're about isn't related to you in any way. But I also just want to mention adult David for a second before we move on to talking about Uriah. Because adult David really is a character in this book. He makes a point of inserting these little asides from time to time that remind us that he is out there somewhere in the future, writing this whole story from a place of knowing how it ends.
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And sometimes he chooses to give us
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a Little glimpse of that ending, or a little teaser almost, because he never actually tells us what happens or what's actually going on at the end. But he just gives us these little clues.
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Clues.
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And we get one of those. In this chapter, adult David is telling us at the very beginning of the chapter about his ability to work hard when he needs to. And that even though he was kind of silly in his youth, even then he was building the character that he has today, which is to be a hard worker with his long hours and his multiple jobs and learning shorthand and all of this. And then he says, here's a quote. How much of the practice I have just reduced to precept I owe to Agnes. I will not repeat here.
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My narrative proceeds to Agnes with a thankful love.
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Now, we have no idea what that means, right? His narrative proceeds to Agnes. In what way? What will it proceed to her about? What does that even mean, that it proceeds to her? We have no idea. But he's signaling to us, if he needed to signal this to us, that Agnes is important, that she matters, and that she will matter right up until the very end. So does Dora have cause to be worried? Will David realize that he loves Agnes and should marry Agnes before he goes ahead and marries Dora? We don't know. But I do think that Dora's awareness of her own shortcomings ought to make us feel a bit more sympathy for her than we had before. But let's move on to this whole situation with Uriah and Dr. Strong for a bit, because Uriah just gets worse and worse every time he shows up, doesn't he? I mean, I hate him. And I love to hate him. I love it. I think he's a great villain, and I'm all for great villains. He's wonderful one. So I think it's great. But it's also awful, right? Because his whole aim now, his whole purpose is to marry Agnes.
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We talked about this before.
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It's the last piece in his scheme to kind of claw his way out of the lower classes and into the middle class by completely taking over the
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Wakefield family, which culminates in him essentially
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becoming the Wickfield family by marrying Agnes. So all his machinations and his evil plans, they're all turned toward that end at this point, which is really bad, because first of all, if he succeeds, it means that Agnes will have to marry Ariah, which is horrifying. But second of all, because it means that he's willing to do all sorts of awful things to the people that we care about to get what he wants. He is fairly certain that he'll eventually be able to convince Mr. Wickfield to let him marry Agnes. He had that one setback with where he revealed his hand too soon. But Mr. Wakefield is so completely under his thumb at this point that he feels confident that eventually he's going to grant his consent. So it's really Agnes herself that he's worried about. He's worried, first of all, that she will accept some other suitor before he's able to ingratiate himself with her. Remember, he doesn't realize that she would never in a million years ever fall
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in love with him.
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He doesn't see how sudden, slimy and horrible he is, which is something I love about him as a character. Not that I love anything about him as a person, but as a feat of writing, it's just brilliant. He thinks he's a handsome, gallant, upstanding man and it's simply his poverty that's stopping him from having a wife like Agnes. It's brilliant that Dickens lets us see
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him the way the world sees him,
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but also makes us understand that Uriah doesn't see himself that way at all. So Uriah thinks that eventually he will be able to make Agnes fall in love with him and that he'll get Mr. Wakefield's consent. But he's worried that either she'll accept someone else first or that people will
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convince her that she could do better socially.
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And that's where this whole plot against the Strongs comes in. Because Uriah sees Annie Strong, who is one of Agnes's good friends. He sees her as someone who might convince Agnes not to marry a man like Uriah, who for social reasons. Okay, here is what Uriah says. She's just the person as would put
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my Agnes up to higher sort of game.
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Meaning Annie is the kind of person who cares about marrying well socially. Presumably. He's implying that Annie married Dr. Strong for his money and his money only. And he's saying that she might convince Agnes to do the same thing. And again, Uriah kind of shows his hand to David. He keeps doing this. He shows him that he's got a whole plan and that anyone who gets in his way is going to be cut down regardless of whether they deserve it it because he's going to get his way no matter what he says. I mustn't be put upon as an humble person too much.
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I can't allow people in my way.
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Which, as Mary says, is really kind of chilling when you think about it. It's one thing to Want to better yourself. It's another thing to completely ruin a
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marriage for your own gain.
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And not even your own gain, your potential gain. Because who knows if Annie would have said anything to Agnes about not marrying Uriah? Because Agnes hopefully won't ever agree to marry your Uriah. Or if she does, it will be to make her father happy and Annie wouldn't be able to dissuade her. So really, Uriah is ruining a marriage essentially for nothing. And as Bonnie says, it's not just that Uriah has misread the situation about Agnes, right? That her decision to marry him or not marry him has nothing to do with Annie. It's also that he has misread Dr. Strong. Because a person like Uriah is always
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going to misread the good people.
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He is never going to understand or anticipate kindness or compassion or loyalty or love, because he doesn't have any of those.
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But Dr. Strong has them in spades.
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And when he learns that people have had these doubts about Annie, his reaction is not, oh, no, my wife is potentially having an affair. His reaction is, oh, no, I married a woman who would have preferred to marry someone else, and I am to blame. Here's what he I have been much to blame. I believe I have been very much to blame. I have exposed one whom I hold
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in my heart to trials and aspersions.
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I call them aspersions even to have been conceived in anybody's inmost mind, of
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which she never, but for me, could have been the object, right?
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So he feels now that Annie only
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accepted his marriage proposal because she felt
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grateful to him for being a sort of father figure to her and that she felt she couldn't say no when he asked. And he feels terrible for not seeing this and for going ahead with the marriage thinking that she wanted to marry him as much as he wanted to marry her. Here's what he says. If I did her wrong, as I
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fear I did in taking advantage, but I never meant it.
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Of her gratitude and her affection, I
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ask pardon of that lady in my heart.
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And his only thought now is to
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shield Annie from the suspicions that people
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have of her that she's been immoral and had an affair.
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He doesn't want her to be sad,
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seen in that way. He wants to protect her. And he's upset that he was too oblivious to understand all of this before and that he hasn't sufficiently protected her up until now.
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So he only cares about protecting her. And his only hope is that he
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will die soon enough, that she will be able to have a life with Jack Malden once he's gone. Because all he wants is for her to be happy. I mean, come on, that is love. That's loyalty, right? Here's what he says.
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It only remains for me to bear
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the knowledge of the unhappiness I have occasioned as submissively as I can.
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It is she who should reproach, not I, to save her from misconstructioncruel.
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Misconstruction that even my friends have not been able to avoid becomes my duty. The more retired we live, the better.
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I shall discharge it.
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And when the time comesmay it come
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soon, if it be his merciful pleasure
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when my death shall release the her from constraint I shall close my eyes
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upon her honored face with unbounded confidence and love and leave her with no sorrow.
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Then to happier and brighter days. And Uriah is like what? I mean, he has no idea at all what Dr. Strong is on about. He can't even conceive of a reaction like this. Here's what he says to David. The thing hasn't took quite the turn that might have been expected for the old scholar. What an excellent man. Is as blind as a brickbat. But this family's out of the cart, I think. Okay, so he thinks that Dr. Strong is blind, meaning that he doesn't understand that Annie is having an affair and that she only married him for his money and that it's all mercenary or whatever.
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But he isn't blind. He may or may not believe that Annie did all those things, but he
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loves Annie and he feels that it was marrying him that put her in this position in the first place. And he's a good man and he's quite loyal and all he wants to do is protect her and shield her from harm. And Uriah has no conception of that at all.
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It's such a lovely, heartbreaking scene.
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And then, as Emily says, we get the satisfaction of watching David smack a couple of teeth out of Uriah's head. You know, I've gotten so many letters from people saying that they wish that David would just punch Uriah in the face. Well, now he's done it. And it's definitely very satisfying, I think. You know, he's smacks him and he tells him what he thinks of him. Here's what he says. I have shown you often enough that I despise you.
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I have shown you now more plainly than I do why should I dread
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your doing your worst?
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To all about you what else do you ever do?
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B
Okay, so this does bring up the possibility that Uriah will now retaliate against David in some way. But as David says, Uriah is evil and would probably try to do something against him at some point anyway. So this way at least he got to hit him. Because, you know, obviously I don't condone random violence, but I do feel that Uriah deserves what he gets because he's actually ruined Dr. Strong's life. And Dr. Strong is one of the best, kindest, most wonderful men and he doesn't deserve that at all. And in doing that, he has also ruined Annie's life as well because she sees that something is wrong now in her relationship with Dr. Strong and that
- [25:55]
A
causes her to become melancholy.
- [25:57]
B
And the only comfort for either of them comes in the form of Mr. Dick, who again, he may not have
- [26:03]
A
a very high intellectual intelligence, but he
- [26:06]
B
has off the charts emotional intelligence. And he sees that these two people that he loves are sad and he goes to them in the simplest, kindest, loveliest way. I mean, may we all have someone like Mr. Dick in our lives, don't you think? Here's what David says about him. I dare say he rarely spoke a
- [26:24]
A
dozen words in an hour, but his quiet interest and his wistful face found
- [26:28]
B
immediate response in both their breasts.
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A
Each knew that the other liked him and that he loved both. And he became what no one else could be, a link between them. Okay, so Uriah is awful.
- [26:40]
B
Dora is a bit more likable, but still not our pick for David to marry. Agnes is wonderful as always. And then at the very end of the chapter, we get this strange kind of missive from Mrs. Micawber that something is very wrong with Mr. Macawer, who, remember, is working for Uriah Heep. So perhaps that's going to come to fruition in some way in relation to Uriah.
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We don't know.
- [27:02]
B
But here's what Mrs. Macawer says. Mr. Macawber is entirely changed.
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He is reserved, he is secret.
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B
His life is a mystery to the partner of his joys and sorrows.
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I again allude to his wife.
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B
Okay, so, wow, there is a lot going on, right? A lot of balls are up in the air as usual. We I've talked for a long time, so let's get to the chapter and see where we're going next. But of course, don't forget to write to me. It's faith k.moore.com and then you click on Contact, fill out that form. There it goes right to my email. Or you can scroll into the show notes and find that same link Please do get in touch. I love to hear about your thoughts, your reactions, your questions.
- [27:37]
A
You're never bothering me.
- [27:38]
B
I do write back. It usually takes me, oh, about a week or so. I've had a couple of times at the Takes me longer when things get backed up. But I do write back and I love to write to you and hear your thoughts and get your emails. So please do write in.
- [27:51]
A
All right, let's get started with chapter 43 of David Copperfield by Charles Dickens. It's story time. Chapter 43 another retrospect once again let me pause upon a memorable period of my life. Let me stand aside to see the phantoms of those days go by me accompanying the shadow of myself in dim procession. Weeks, months, seasons pass along. They seem little more than a summer day and a winter evening. Now the common where I walk with Dora is all in bloom, a field of bright gold. And now the unseen heather lies in mounds and bunches underneath a covering of snow, Snow in a breath. The river that flows through our Sunday walks is sparkling in the summer sun, is ruffled by the winter wind, or thickened with drifting heaps of ice. Faster than ever river ran towards the sea. It flashes, darkens, and rolls away. Not a thread changes in the house of the two little bird like ladies. The clock ticks over the fireplace. The weather glass hangs in the hall. Neither clock nor weather glass is ever right, but we believe in both devoutly. I have come legally to man's estate. I have attained the dignity of 21. But this is a sort of dignity that may be thrust upon one. Let me think what I have achieved. I have tamed that savage stenographic mystery. I make a respectable income by it. I am in high repute for my accomplishment in all pertaining to the art, and AM joined with 11 others in reporting the debate in Parliament for a morning newspaper. Night after night I record predictions that never come to pass, professions that are never fulfilled, explanations that are only meant to mystify. I wallow in words. Britannia, that unfortunate female, is always before me like a trussed fowl, skewered through and through with office pens, and bound hand and foot with red tape. I am sufficiently behind the scenes to know the worth of political life. I am quite an infidel about it, and shall never be converted. My dear old Traddles has tried his hand at the same pursuit, but it is not in Traddles's way. He is perfectly good humored respecting his failure, and reminds me that he always did consider himself slow. He has occasional employment on the Same newspaper. In getting up the facts of dry subjects to be written about and embellished by more fertile minds. He is called to the bar and with admirable industry and self denial has scraped another hundred pounds together to fee a conveyancer whose chambers he attends. A great deal of very hot port wine was consumed at his call. And considering the figure, I should think the inner temple must have made a profit by it. I have come out in another way. I have taken with fear and trembling to authorship. I wrote a little something in secret and sent it to a magazine and it was published in the magazine. Since then I have taken heart to write a good many trifling pieces. Now I am regularly paid for them. Altogether I am well off. When I tell my income on the fingers of my left hand I pass the third finger and take in the fourth to the middle joint. We have removed from Buckingham street to a pleasant little cottage very near the one I looked at when my enthusiasm first came on. My aunt, however, who has sold the house at Dover to good advantage, is not going to remain here, but intends removing herself to a still more tiny cottage close at hand.
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B
What does this portend?
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A
My marriage. Yes. Yes, I am going to be married to Dora. Miss Lavinia and Miss Clarissa have given their consent. And if ever canary birds were in a flutter, they are. Miss Lavinia, self charged with the superintendence of my darling's wardrobe, is constantly cutting out brown paper cuirasses. A cuirass is a kind of body armor that goes over the torso. So he's saying she's cutting out the shape of Dora's torso to use as a pattern for her clothes. And differing in opinion from a highly respectable young man with a long bundle and a yard measure under his arm. A dressmaker always stabbed in the breast with a needle and thread boards and lodges in the house and seems to me eating, drinking or sleeping never to take her thimble off. They make a lay figure of my dear. They are always sending for her to come and try something on. We can't be happy together for five minutes in the evening. But some intrusive female knocks at the door and says, oh, if you please, Miss Dora, would you step upstairs? Miss Clarissa and my aunt roam all over London to find out articles of furniture for Dora and me to look at. It would be better for them to buy the goods at once without this ceremony of inspection. For when we go to see a kitchen fender and meat screen, Dora sees a Chinese house for Jip with little bells on the Top and prefers that, and it takes a long time to accustom Jip to his new residence after we have bought it. Whenever he goes in or out he makes all the little bells ring and is horribly frightened. Peggy comes up to make herself useful and falls to work immediately. Her department appears to be to clean everything over and over again. She rubs everything that can be rubbed until it shines like her own honest forehead with perpetual friction. And now it is that I begin to see her solitary brother passing through the dark streets at night and looking as he goes among the wandering faces. I never speak to him at such an hour. I know too well, as his grave figure passes onward, what he seeks and what he dreads. Why does Traddles look so important when he calls upon me this afternoon in the comments where I still occasionally attend for form's sake, when I have time, the realization of my boyish daydreams is at hand. I am going to take out the license, meaning the marriage license. It is a little document to do so much, and Traddles contemplates it as it lies upon my desk, half in admiration, half in awe. There are the names in the sweet old visionary connection, David Copperfield and Dora Spenlow. And there in the corner is that parental institution, the Stamp Office, which is so benignantly interested in the various transactions of human life, looking down upon our union. And there is the Archbishop of Canterbury invoking a blessing on us in print and doing it as cheap as could possibly be expected. Nevertheless, I am in a dreama flustered, happy, hurried dream.
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B
I can't believe that it is going
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A
to be, and yet I can't believe
- [34:38]
B
but that everyone I pass in the
- [34:40]
A
street must have some kind of perception that I am to be married the day after tomorrow. The surrogate knows me when I go down to be sworn and disposes of me easily, as if there were a Masonic understanding between us. Traddles is not at all wanted, but is in attendance as my general backer. I hope the next time you come here, my dear fellow, I say to Traddles, it will be on the same
- [35:02]
B
errand for yourself, and I hope it will be soon.
- [35:05]
A
Thank you for your good wishes, my dear Copperfield, he replies. I hope so too. It's a satisfaction to know that she'll wait for me any length of time and that she really is the dearest girl. When are you to meet her at the coach? I ask. At seven, says Traddles, looking at his plain old silver watch, the very watch he once took a wheel out of at school. To make a water mill that is about Ms. Wickfield's time, is it not? A little earlier? Her time is half past eight. I assure you, my dear boy, says Traddles, I am almost as pleased as if I were going to be married myself. To think that this event is coming to such a happy termination. And really the great friendship and consideration of personally associating Sophie with the joyful occasion and inviting her to be a bridesmead in conjunction with Ms. Wickfield demands my warmest thanks. I am extremely sensible of it. I hear him and shake hands with him and we talk and walk and dine and so on. But I don't believe it. Nothing is real. Sophie arrives at the house of Dora's aunts in due course. She has the most agreeable of faces, not absolutely beautiful, but extraordinarily pleasant. And is one of the most genial, unaffected, frank, engaging creatures I have ever seen. Traddles presents her to us with great pride and rubs his hands for 10 minutes by the clock with every individual hair upon his head, Standing on tiptoe when I congratulate him in a corner on his choice. I have brought Agnes from the Canterbury coach and her cheerful and beautiful face is among us for the second time. Agnes has a great liking for Traddles and it is capital to see them meet and to observe the glory of Traddles as he commends the dearest girl in the world to her acquaintance. Still I don't believe it. We have a delightful evening and are supremely happy. But I don't believe it. Yet I can't collect myself. I can't check off my happiness as it takes place. I feel in a misty and unsettled kind of state, as if I had got up very early in the morning a week or two ago and had never been to bed since. I can't make out when yesterday was. I seem to have been carrying the license about in my pocket many months next day too, when we all go in a flock to see the house, our house, Dora's and mine, I am quite unable to regard myself as its master. I seem to be there by permission of somebody else. I half expect the real master to come home presently and say he is glad to see me. Such a beautiful little house as it is, with everything so bright and new. With the flowers on the carpets looking as if freshly gathered and the green leaves on the paper as if they had just come out. With the spotless muslin curtains and the blushing rose coloured furniture and Dora's garden hat with the Blue ribbon. Do I remember now how I loved her in such another hat when I
- [37:54]
B
first saw her already hanging on its
- [37:57]
A
little peg, the guitar case quite at home on its heels in a corner and everybody tumbling over Gyp's pagoda, which is much too big for the establishment. Another happy evening, quite as unreal as all the rest of it. And I steal into the usual room before going away. Dora is not there. I suppose they have not done trying on yet. Ms. Lavinia peeps in and tells me mysteriously that she will not be long. She is rather long notwithstanding. But by and by I hear a rustling at the door and some one taps. I say, come in, but someone taps again. I go to the door wondering who it is. There I meet a pair of bright eyes and a blushing face. They are Dora's eyes and face and Ms. Lavinia has dressed her in tomorrow's dress, bonnet and all for me to see. I take my little wife to my heart and Ms. Lavinia gives a little scream because I tumble the bonnet. And Dora laughs and cries at once because I am so pleased and I believe it less than ever. Do you think it pretty, Dodie? Says Dora. Pretty?
- [39:03]
B
I should rather think I did.
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A
And are you sure you like me? Very much, says Dora. The topic is fraught with such danger to the bonnet that Ms. Lavinia gives another little scream and begs me to
- [39:15]
B
understand that Dora is only to be
- [39:17]
A
looked at and on no account to be touched. So Dora stands in a delightful state of confusion for a minute or two to be admired, and then takes off her bonnet, looking so natural without it, and runs away with it in her hand and comes dancing down again in her own familiar dress and asks Gyp if I have got a beautiful little wife and whether he'll forgive her for being married, and kneels down to make him stand upon the cookery book for the last time in her single life. I go home more incredulous than ever to a lodging that I have hard by and get up very early in the morning to ride to the Highgate Road and fetch my aunt. I have never seen my aunt in such a state. She is dressed in lavender colored silk and has a white bonnet on and is amazing. Janet has dressed her and is there to look at me. Peggotty is ready to go to church intending to behold the ceremony from the gallery. Mr. Dick, who is to give my darling to me at the altar, has had his hair curled. Traddles, whom I have taken up by appointment at the turnpike, presents a dazzling combination of cream color and light blue, and Both he and Mr. Dick have a general effect about them of being all gloves. No doubt I see this because I know it is so, but I am astray and seem to see nothing, nor do I believe anything whatever. Still, as we drive along in an open carriage, this fairy marriage is real enough to fill me with a sort of wondering pity for the unfortunate people who have no part in it but are sweeping out the shops and going to their daily occupations. My aunt sits with my hand in hers all the way. When we stop a little way short of the church to put down Peggotty, whom we have brought on the box, she gives it a squeeze and me a kiss.
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B
God bless you, Trot.
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A
My own boy never could be dearer. I think of poor dear baby this morning. So do I, and of all I owe to you, dear Aunt. Tut, child, says my aunt, and gives her hand in overflowing cordiality to Traddles, who then gives his to Mr. Dick, who then gives his to me, who then gives mine to Traddles. And then we come to the church door. The church is calm enough, I am sure, but it might be a steam powerloom in full action for any sedative effect it has on me. I am far too gone for that. The rest is all a more or less incoherent dreama dream of their coming in with Dora, of the pew opener arranging us like a drill sergeant before the altar rails of my wondering even then why pew openers must always be the most disagreeable females procurable and whether there is any religious dread of a disastrous infection of good humour which renders it indispensable to set those vessels of vinegar upon the road to heaven of the clergyman and clerk appearing, of a few boatmen and some other people strolling in of an ancient mariner behind me strongly flavouring the church with rum of the service beginning in a deep voice and are all being very attentive of Ms. Lavinia who acts as semi auxiliary bridesmaid being the first to cry and of her doing homage as I take it, to the memory of Pidger in sobs, of Ms. Clarissa applying a smelling bottle, of Agnes taking care of Dora, of my aunt endeavouring to represent herself as a model of sternness with tears rolling down her face, of little Dora trembling very much and making her responses in faint whispers of our kneeling down together side by side, of Dora's trembling less and less but always clasping Agnes by the hand of the service being got through quietly and gravely, of our all looking at Each other in an April state of smiles and tears when it is over. Of my young wife being hysterical in the vestry and crying for her poor papa, her dear papa. Of her soon cheering up again and our signing the register all round. Of my going into the gallery for Peggotty to bring her to sign it. Of Peggotty's hugging me in a corner and telling me she saw my own dear mother married. Of its being over and our going away. Of my walking so proudly and lovingly down the aisle with my sweet wife upon my arm, through a mist of half seen people, pulpits, monuments, pews, fonts, organs and church windows in which there flutter faint airs of association with my childish church at home so long ago. Of their whispering as we pass what a youthful couple we are, and what a pretty little wife she is. Of our all being so merry and talkative in the carriage going back. Of Sophie telling us that when she saw Traddles, whom I had entrusted with the license asked for it, she almost fainted, having been convinced that he would contrive to lose it or to have his pocket picked. Of Agnes laughing gaily and of Dora being so fond of Agnes that she will not be separated from her, but still keeps her hand of there being a breakfast with abundance of things pretty and substantial to eat and drink, whereof I partake as I should do in any other dream, without the least perception of their flavour. Eating and drinking, as I may say, nothing but love and marriage, and no more believing in the viands than in anything else. Of my making a speech in the same dreamy fashion without having an idea of what I want to say beyond such as may be comprehended in the full conviction that I haven't said it. Of our being very sociably and simply happy. Always it a dream, though, and of gyps having wedding cake and its not agreeing with him afterwards. Of the pair of hired post horses being ready, and of Dora's going away to change her dress. Of my aunt and Miss Clarissa remaining with us and are walking in the garden and my aunt who has made quite a speech at breakfast, touching Dora's aunts being mightily amused with herself, but a little proud of it too. Of Dora's being ready and of Miss Lavinia's hovering about her loth to lose the pretty toy that has given her so much pleasant occupation meaning. Miss Lavinia is sad to see Dora go. Of Dora's making a long series of surprise discoveries that she has forgotten all sorts of little things and of everybody running everywhere to fetch them of their all, closing about Dora, when at last she begins to say good bye, looking with their bright colours and ribbons like a bed of flowers, of my darling being almost smothered among the flowers, and coming out laughing and crying both together to my jealous arms, of my wanting to carry Gyp, who is to go along with us, and Dora saying no that she must carry him, or else he'll think she don't like him any more now she is married and will break his heart. Of our going arm in arm and Dora stopping and looking back and saying if I have ever been cross or ungrateful to anybody, don't remember it, and bursting into tears of her waving her little hand and our going away once more, of her once more stopping and looking back and hurrying to Agnes, and giving Agnes above all the others, her last kisses and farewells. We drive away together and I awake from the dream. I believe it at last. It is my dear, dear little wife beside me whom I love so well. Are you happy now, you foolish boy? Says Dora, and sure you don't repent. I have stood aside to see the phantoms of those days go by me. They are gone and I resume the journey of my story. Thank you so much for listening. I'd love to know what you thought of the chapters. Is there anything you'd like me to clarify? Did something particularly interest you? Please go to my website, faithkmoore.com, click on Contact and send me your questions and thoughts. Or you can click on the link in the Show Notes to contact me. I'll feature one or two of your entries at the start of the next episode. Speaking of links, don't forget to take a look at the other links in the Show Notes. You can learn more about me, check out our Merch store, or become a member of the Storytime for Grown Ups online community. Before I go, I'd like to ask a quick favor. This is an independent podcast. It's produced, recorded and marketed by me, so I need your help. Spread the word about the show by posting about it on social media or texting a link to your friends. Subscribe tap those five stars and leave a positive review wherever you're listening. If you are able to support the show financially, there's a link in the
- [47:31]
B
Show Notes to make a donation.
- [47:32]
A
I would really, really appreciate it. All right everyone, story time is over. To be continue.