"Couples Having Separate Hobbies" w/ Caleb Hearon

Summary

Podcast Summary: StraightioLab

Episode: "Couples Having Separate Hobbies" w/ Caleb Hearon

Date: May 26, 2026
Hosts: George Civeris & Sam Taggart
Guest: Caleb Hearon
Network: Big Money Players Network & iHeartPodcasts

---

Episode Overview

This episode dives deep into the straight cultural phenomenon of couples having separate hobbies. Hosts George and Sam, joined by comedian Caleb Hearon, unpack the joys, tensions, and societal quirks around maintaining individuality in relationships—especially through hobbies and social time apart from one’s partner. The discussion, as always, is peppered with their signature mix of sharp cultural critique, personal anecdotes, rapid-fire wit, and a willingness to dunk on themselves and their communities (be it gay, straight, or otherwise).

---

Key Discussion Points and Insights

Getting Settled & Podcasting Vibes

• Nostalgia & Chronic Illness Allyship (03:04–05:00)

  • Sam brings up his “chronic illness allyship sleep mask” as a humorous nod to Lena Dunham discourse.
  • The group discusses nostalgia and “reading in the park,” with Kayla admitting, “I have chronic nostalgia currently” (04:57).
  • Banter about LA vs. NYC literacy and creative culture.

• Falling Outs & Conflict (07:21–08:50)

  • Discussion of how comedians and creative partners handle relationships, tension, and “falling out.”
  • Sam: “There was a moment of tension...but instead, I actually amended the relationship.” (07:38)

Fatigue, Friendship, and Performance Art

• Performance Art & Identity in Community (09:44–10:58)
  • George explains his love for vehicles and movement—but not roller coasters (“I don’t get to decide where it moves”).
  • They riff on growing up surrounded by women and how even matriarchies can reinforce conservative norms.
  • George: “The women in my family have said some of the most conservative things I’ve ever heard.” (11:18)
  • Notable quote: “Podcasting mostly as a medium is pretty dumb...two [smart] podcasts: yours and Call Her Daddy” – Caleb (11:36)

---

Memorable Quotes & Moments

On Podcasting and Comedy Relationship Dynamics

• The Art of Public Fights
  • Sam: “I sometimes think that the most comedic thing you can do is be mean...it was just like, I’m trying to, like, think of something to say, and I’m like, roast battle.” (19:06)
  • Kayla on old fights: “Whenever you bring up old fights, it...creates a new version of it.” (21:08)

On Hosting & Performing Together

• Post-Show Guilt
  • George: “I feel guilt that...they came here tonight. Like, it might be the only fun thing they get to do all month...and I’m like—God damn it, I didn’t do it” (22:47)
  • Sam: “This was my London debut. I flopped. Like, the UK is not in my wheelhouse. I have been rejected. Like, forget Fringe.” (23:29)

Straight Shooters Segment (Rapid Fire)

(27:32–29:55)

• Caleb answers, then immediately self-evaluates:
  • “I’m happy with all my answers.” (28:40)
• Hosts pretend to dock “doves” from his score for being too confident.

---

Segment: Straight Topic—Couples Having Separate Hobbies

(58:09– )

• Premise:

  • Caleb argues, “Straight people have separate hobbies that their partner’s not invited to. I want gay people to get involved.” (58:14)
  • Pet peeve: Couples responding to invitations as a “we” when only one was invited:
    • “When couples become ‘we’ without my consent...” (58:50)
  • Distinction: Some couples are “exempt”: “I knew each of them separately before they became a couple. There are rules to this shit.” (59:04)

• Straight Culture’s ‘Boys Night/Girls Night’

  • Sam describes the straight tradition as being rooted in “roast-based humor” and sometimes toxic, but affirms the value of individual time.
  • George admires the healthy assertion: “In every relationship I’ve ever been in, I have had multiple times…where I’ve said, ‘You can’t come tonight. I want to see my friends.’” (61:59)
  • Kayla agrees it is a “helpful barrier” and wishes for more “separate friends” culture in queer relationships.

• Practical Solutions

  • Direct communication is key: “Texting and saying...it’s a girls night, nobody’s partners are invited.” (71:17)
  • On forced partner integration: “Nothing worse than when your friend…tries to make the group love [their partner]…It’s been six years. We don’t like him.” (72:00)

---

Vulnerability, Fears, and Existential Stuff

• Fears, God, and Animals (41:04–48:16)
  • The group shares their biggest fears:
    • Kayla: Fish (“I think you’re gonna swim into my mouth and I’m gonna choke and die.” 37:23)
    • Sam: “Pure, pure loneliness. Like, complete isolation.” (43:42)
    • George: “My biggest fear? I guess probably that I’m wrong about all the God stuff.” (45:53)
    • Extended riff about negotiating with “traditional Bible God.”
      • George: “I literally think I could be like, ‘brother, come on, you made me, I’m your son.’” (46:36)
      • Sam: “He’d be like, ‘you’d do well in hell. Your whole vibe would crush.’” (47:37)

---

Digressions of Note

• Trends and Conformity:

  • Fashion confessionals: “Have I ever had an original thought or am I just sort of copying what people are doing around me?” – Kayla (36:30)
  • Itwitch! George and Sam compare notes on their mysterious eye twitches, health anxieties, and the tragicomedy of being the “friend always in the hospital.” (65:13–66:46)

• Giving Blood, Gay Discrimination & Wedding Cakes:

  • George: “Gay guys who are so pissed they can’t give blood—Oh my god, it’s so fake.” (68:41)
  • The trio find the “gay wedding cake dilemma” overblown: “I don’t care. Wedding cake. Fuck you. I’ll take my business somewhere else.” – George (69:09)

• Football, Reality TV, and Queer Spectatorship:

  • George is a football fan, hosts are not: “Have you ever watched the Chiefs?…I make good food for it.” (81:14)
  • Sam: “I watch the Olympics like I’m watching a Lady Gaga concert—the way I’m processing it is not how other people are processing it.” (81:51)
  • George has never watched Drag Race: “I’ve never seen it…Drag Race, I’m sure it’s great, but no one’s made a compelling pitch to me yet.” (83:12)

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• “Podcasting…is pretty dumb and like, contributing to a cultural dumbness that we will never come back from. My podcast included. Two that are actually making podcasting smart: your guys's show…and Call Her Daddy…”
  – Caleb (11:36)

• “In every relationship I’ve ever been in, I have had multiple times…where I’ve said, ‘You can’t come tonight. I want to see my friends.’”
  – George (61:59)

• “Nothing worse than when your friend…is trying to like, make the group love [their partner]…It’s been six years. We don’t like him.”
  – George (72:00)

• “I have a huge fear that everyone in Boston now hates me.”
  – Sam (07:55)

• “Pure, pure loneliness. Like, complete isolation.”
  – Sam (43:42)

• “My biggest fear?...I guess probably that I’m wrong about all the God stuff. That would be a nightmare.”
  – George (45:53)

• “When couples become ‘we’ without my consent, your partner…you have to ask...Jared’s not always necessarily invited.”
  – Caleb (58:48)

---

Segment Highlights with Timestamps

00:00–03:04

Ads and housekeeping, skip.

03:04–07:21

Introductions, nostalgia chat, and chronic illness jokes.

07:21–23:56

Old fights, podcast friendship dynamics, comedy in conflict, and communal guilt over lackluster live shows.

27:31–29:37

Straight Shooters segment (humorous rapid fire culture check).

58:09–75:01

Main topic: Couples with separate hobbies—rules, etiquette, solutions, the gender binary as social framework, and the case for directness in social planning.

89:15–95:17

Shout Outs segment—earnest, comedic, and musical recommendations; local businesses; and creative plugs.

---

Final Segment: Shout Outs

(89:15–94:41)

• Sam: Shout out to artist/musician Kelela’s new album.
• George: Shouts out Myrtle Todd restaurant, Dondria the singer, Lena Dunham, and the Citibike physical fob (“You do not have to use your phone to get a city bike. They will send you a physical fob.” 93:31)
• Caleb: Promotes his comedy, podcast (“So True with Caleb Heron”), and films including a Netflix project with John Cena, and a “Pizza Movie” for Hulu.

---

Overall Tone and Style

This was a classic StraightioLab: self-aware, referential, and alternately sincere and scathing. The hosts and guest alternate between heartfelt confessions, absurdist riffs, brutal takedowns of both straight and queer culture, and performative bits—all through the lens of “studying” straight customs. There’s an undercurrent of real friendship and mutual respect, visible in their willingness to admit fears, recall fights, and debate the etiquette of coupledom.

---

For New Listeners

Fans of sharp banter, deadpan humor, finely-observed relationship talk, and meta-commentary on podcasting and queer cultural norms will find this to be an insightful and hilarious episode. If you ever wondered why straight people have “girls night” or what’s gained or lost when every queer date is “plus one,” this episode is both a send-up and an earnest meditation on the topic.

---

Listen for:

• The “rules” and etiquette of inviting vs. bringing your partner
• The importance (and difficulty) of maintaining individuality in modern relationships
• Soft but pointed guidance on handling group dynamics, friend circles, and boundaries
• Joyous tangents on food, gender, football, and the eternal search for the perfect city bike helmet.

---

Summary by podcast summarizer, based on full transcript. Timestamps refer to original, unedited episode, with ad breaks omitted for clarity.

Transcript

[Dr. Joy]

This is an iHeart podcast.

[George]

Guaranteed Human

[Kayla]

during Memorial Day at Lowe's Shop. Household must haves for less. Save $80 on a Char Broil Performance Series 4 Burner Grill to chef up something special plus get up to 45% off. Select major appliances to keep things fresh. Our best lineup is here at Lowes Lowes. We help you save valid through 527 while supplies last selection varies by location. See Lowes.com for details.

[George]

Visit your nearby Lowe's Foreign. It's Kel Penn I'm inviting you to join the best sounding book club you've ever heard with my podcast Hearsay The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. Every episode I nerd out with amazing guests and dive into the best new audiobooks available on Audible. It's the book club for your ears.

[Ad Read Announcer]

Listen to Earsay the Audible and I

[George]

Heart Audiobook Club on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Dr. Joy]

This is Dr. Joy from Therapy for Black Girls. A fresh sparkling kitchen. Yes please. The scrubbing it takes to get one not a favorite. That's why you'll love Dawn Power Wash. Just free. From everyday dishes to the toughest messes, it makes cleanup twice as fast. Less scrubbing, more living. Find Dawn Power Wash Dish Spray at your favorite retailer. Dawn is a proud sponsor of the Elton John Impact Awards, honoring those who have helped shape a more inclusive and compassionate world with their artistry, advocacy and unwavering commitment to equality. Don't miss the Elton John Impact awards podcast, available June 1 on the iHeartRadio app. And everywhere podcasts are heard.

[Kayla]

The old gays are back with Silver Linings, their lovable podcast from iHeart's Ruby Studio in partnership with Veev Healthcare. Robert, Mick, Bill and Jesse strut back down memory lane for season two, sharing lessons on life, love and loss. These are the kinds of insights that only come from experience. So tune in to Silver Linings with the old gays on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. Tour announcement starts now. Hello everyone, it is me, Sam and I am going on tour this summer. I'm doing my hour of incredible stand up comedy and I would love, love, love to see you there. So I will be in San Francisco, Portland, Seattle, Chicago, D.C. boston, Philly and maybe a couple more. But if you are in any of those places please please please get tickets. I would love to see you all there and I'm really really excited because I love touring now. So see you there. Okay, Enjoy the app. Bye. Podcast starts now. What is up, everyone? You are listening to Stratiolab live in New York City roughly four weeks ago.

[Sam]

Yeah, it's not quite live. I brought my chronic Illness Allyship sleep mask. Caleb, you can open your eyes.

[Kayla]

Oh, you brought your fame sick mask.

[Sam]

I brought my chronic illness Allyship sleep mask, courtesy of the whole team at Lena Dunham hq.

[George]

Now, what makes it Chronic Illness Allyship? Do they need to pill?

[Sam]

Well, a big part of the book. I don't know if you've read it, Kayla.

[George]

I've not read it.

[Sam]

She is a huge figure in our industry. We've both finished it.

[Kayla]

I've not finished it.

[Sam]

Okay, well, I finished it and I actually have it in audio and also in print form.

[George]

Thank you.

[Sam]

And so I think the theme of the press tour has been kind of, oh, she's sleepy. She's sleepy.

[George]

Oh, my goodness.

[Sam]

And she's sleepy. Both in a kind of empowering way and in a chronic illness way. And the tension of that drives a big part of the book. And so you can kind of always put on your silk fame sick mask and kind of relax.

[George]

Are you getting paid to behave this way or is this just something that you.

[Kayla]

Thank you for pointing out this. It's non normative.

[Sam]

Yeah. Well, I think I believe I was sent this because there was a clip of our podcast where I said, adam Driver doesn't thank Lena Dunham enough. And I think that was put into some sort of Google Drive. And they said, he's getting a mask.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And I thought, you know what?

[George]

Send him a fucking mask.

[Kayla]

Yeah. It's just a bit odd that they didn't send me one as well.

[Sam]

Well, I was the one who actually said that particular comment.

[Kayla]

Well, I did add to it. I added some comedic elements. Of course.

[Sam]

That's true. People don't respect. People rarely respect comedy for comedy's sake. You know, they want you to, like, make a distinct point. I was kind of going Hannah Gatsby mode and just sort of talking.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

That's beautiful, by the way.

[Kayla]

Which is a beautiful and celebrated, I

[Sam]

do want to say, certainly a celebrated.

[Kayla]

I was 45 minutes early to this recording.

[Sam]

That's right. And I was four minutes early.

[George]

You were 45 minutes early.

[Kayla]

I was 45 minutes early. It was quite humiliating.

[George]

I was early and I was sitting alone. Where were you?

[Kayla]

I went for a walk. I went to the park and I was reading Fame Sick in the park.

[George]

Oh, my goodness.

[Sam]

And I was a respect Four minutes late.

[Kayla]

You were.

[George]

That was beautiful, by the way.

[Kayla]

Thank you. And I just gotta Say, reading in the park. I'm in a nostalgia mode.

[Sam]

Bad.

[Kayla]

I have chronic nostalgia currently.

[Sam]

That's actually a chronic illness and it is scary.

[George]

Well, you're nostalgic for the idea of reading or what has happened for being

[Kayla]

present in a city of people that are so beautiful and touching. Where I used to live, I'm seeing, oh, my God, my past, my present, my future.

[Sam]

A huge part of Sam's life is basically implying that everyone in Los Angeles is just like an illiterate, sort of like idiotic gay guy. And then doing that publicly on his podcast. And then someone will confront him in Los Angeles, the city where he resides, and he'll say, don't talk to me about that.

[George]

Yeah, I don't think you're completely off base. There is something going on in la. What it is, is there's a sort of the sun on the west coast has a sort of poison that makes you not want to do anything. And reading is certainly under the umbrella of anything.

[Sam]

I'm definitely having a. I'm kind of catching up on the Spencer Pratt mayor.

[George]

Hey. Fucking moron. What a brain dead fuck. Sorry, what were you saying?

[Sam]

Well, you know, I was thinking, because it came into my feed. Were you sort of a Chelsea Lately gay?

[George]

Oh, sure I was.

[Sam]

Okay, so Heather McDonald endorsed Spencer Pratt.

[Kayla]

Really?

[Sam]

Yes. And it came up on my feed and I said, this is the rise of Trump for my specific demographic, which is millennial gays who watch Chelsea Lately. This is what it must have felt like if you're Gen X, Boomer, whatever, grew up with Trump and then he became president. That's what it's like for me.

[George]

I don't.

[Sam]

Because I grew up with Spencer.

[George]

Heather McDonald is.

[Sam]

Oh, she was. She was one of the Jealousy Lately writers and frequent performers.

[Kayla]

She was on the panel a lot.

[Sam]

She was on the panel a lot.

[George]

She should have been more memorable. And now her endorsements are flopping as well. Isn't that sad?

[Sam]

Actually, they might not be flopping, and

[George]

that's what sort of the endorsement's flopping, because I don't know who she is. The candidacy might be. Unfortunately, the candidacy might be having some wind, but her endorsement has flopped in the fieldhouse.

[Kayla]

How many years of watching Chelsea lately did it take you guys to figure out her last name isn't Lately?

[George]

I knew.

[Sam]

I knew that pretty early on, I would say.

[Kayla]

I said, I like this comedian Chelsea Lately.

[George]

I hate to be at odds with you, but I did know pretty early she was having fat people on there. That's one thing I Remember, she was having fat people on that.

[Sam]

Oh, my God. She's one of the most inclusive people nationwide.

[George]

She was having fat people on that show. And I was going, where? Who are these fat people? Who are these big fat people on my screen?

[Sam]

Always a diverse. She kind of invented dei.

[George]

Hello.

[Sam]

She always a diverse roundtable. And she would definitely have a falling out with someone, but then she would have someone else that she would be really committed to and always bring on tour. And she really lifted people up.

[George]

Are you guys having fallings out, by the way?

[Sam]

That's an interesting question. I almost had one and I saved it.

[George]

What happened? Who was it? Will you say?

[Sam]

Or you just heard? There was a moment of tension and I could have. If I wanted to go reality show mode, I could have said. And when you said that, I didn't like it.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

But instead I actually amended the relationship.

[George]

Wow.

[Sam]

And. And then I'm trying to think of other. Have you had big falling out, Falling out in comedy?

[Kayla]

No, I just get distant.

[George]

Yeah. You know, cold and silent.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Wow.

[Kayla]

It's not as fun, it's not as splashy, but it's like, it's long term.

[Sam]

I do have this huge fear that, you know, I started in Boston. I was only there for two years, but they were very formative, and I have this fear based on nothing, that everyone in Boston now hates me.

[George]

That's really interesting. What do you think that's based on?

[Sam]

I think it's. Maybe I don't go back enough. Or maybe I once said something that was somehow condescending. One time, I think maybe with you, but somewhere I said something like, I loved coming up in Boston because it's like learning figure drawing in art school before you, like, do something.

[George]

So I can see where your worries come from.

[Kayla]

You know what I mean?

[Sam]

And it's like. That's extremely condescending to say that. To say that about a scene.

[George]

Sure, that's gonna be hurtful.

[Kayla]

It's like.

[Sam]

What I meant was that's where I learned set up punchline joke writing.

[George]

Yes.

[Kayla]

And you think I mean.

[Sam]

Which, by the way, by the way, is still what I do. It's not like I'm now doing the Woman who is a Bell at the Venice Biennale. Have you seen that?

[George]

No.

[Sam]

Okay, so at the Venice Biennale, the Taco Bell.

[Kayla]

He's been wanting to talk about this for a while.

[Sam]

I've.

[George]

I've been waiting to hear about it.

[Sam]

Her name is Florentina something.

[George]

Sure.

[Sam]

She's Austrian lately. Florentina lately, yeah. Her name Is Florentina lately? She always is uplifting fat comedians. Yes. And at the Venice Biennale, her big. She's a performance artist. Her big piece is that. Imagine a bell, but the thing that ring, that's ringing the bell is a fat person. No, it's actually a thin, naked woman.

[Kayla]

As an image, it is really amazing. And it's sort of silly in a way that if I were to see this at sort of an indie show in Brooklyn, New York, I would say, oh, I like that. I like that comedian coming.

[George]

Oh, oh, I don't think I like that. I think I'm upset by that, actually.

[Sam]

Find a better video.

[George]

Yeah, I think you just showed me. Bring up another one. Let's see. Okay.

[Sam]

This is the other thing she did.

[George]

I'm interested in the water.

[Sam]

She's jet skiing.

[George]

That's sick.

[Kayla]

Isn't that cool?

[George]

That's sick. That's the kind of I go in for.

[Kayla]

I mean, that's. Call Slater. That's about to be a music video.

[George]

I really like that. And also, one thing you guys need to know about me if you ever want to understand me and get deeper with me, is that I like to be on things that move. I love vehicles.

[Kayla]

Really?

[George]

I love bicycles. I love mopeds. I love jet skis.

[Sam]

You like a jet ski?

[George]

I love a four wheeler. I love a golf cart. Anything that moves, I go. I get really excited about. I just rolled.

[Sam]

Do you like a roller coaster then?

[George]

I do not like roller coasters. Really? I don't get to decide where it moves.

[Sam]

It's on track.

[George]

I don't like moving things on track.

[Sam]

You like driving? You like controlling.

[George]

I love driving because I choose.

[Sam]

But do you. Would you want to be on a jet ski but kind of sexy behind someone holding their waist?

[George]

No, I'm not.

[Sam]

You want someone holding your waist?

[George]

Someone can hold my waist, but I want to be in charge.

[Sam]

So you're kind of top sure.

[George]

Yes. And I would love to be in charge at pretty much all times. There's no time that I can imagine me not wanting to be in charge, really. Except for sometimes at dinner.

[Kayla]

I think I do have. I think jet skis are hard for me because it's so attached to, like, riding behind a friend's dad.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And having to hold on to him and be like, how do I hold on to you? Where you don't call me gay.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And there's no way.

[George]

That's really scary. I'm sorry you went through that.

[Kayla]

Yeah, it's tough.

[George]

That sucks.

[Kayla]

But they're not Gonna let me drive?

[George]

I was writing behind, like, friends, moms.

[Kayla]

Oh, that's nice.

[Sam]

It's always matriarchy with you.

[Kayla]

I know.

[Sam]

You're like, I grew up in a polycule.

[Kayla]

God.

[George]

No. I did weirdly have a kind of progressive, like, all the. Yeah, it was just a lot of women, like, taking care of each other's kids. I was around everyone's moms. It was nice. I liked it. None of them lesbians, though, which is one of my biggest regrets.

[Sam]

Well, it's interesting about growing up around a lot of moms, because I grew up, I was partly raised by. By both my grandmothers. And every. It was very. I have two sisters. You would think inherently growing up with all women is progressive. Oftentimes they say things that are more right wing than the men.

[George]

Listen, the women in my family have said some of the most conservative things I've ever heard.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Particularly around, like, being a man, which is interesting that they were really reinforcing. Like, I would do something kind of girly, and they'd be like, boys don't do that.

[Sam]

And I'd be like, whoa, yeah, you

[George]

can't act like that. You're a girl. Yeah, we're supposed to be cool about this kind of stuff. Oh, wait. Can I give you guys my compliment?

[Kayla]

Yes, please.

[George]

I came in with a compliment I wanted to give you guys. Yeah, I think that podcasting mostly as a medium is pretty dumb and, like, contributing to a cultural dumbness that we will never come back from. My podcast included, I think. No, I mean it. And I think two of the podcasts that are, like, actually making podcasting smart is your guys's show. And then, of course, Charlie and Natalie. Oh, yes. And then Call her Daddy. So it's you guys, Charlie and Natalie, Exploration Live Plug. And then call her Daddy. Those are my intellectual points.

[Sam]

Do you want to guess what the only episode of Call Her Daddy I've listened to is? Guess who the guest is.

[George]

Oh, I'm trying to think of who's been on there. Can you name people that have been on there?

[Kayla]

No. Not one.

[George]

Right. Was it. Was it. Was that the one where she was

[Kayla]

like, I have a Glock, or is it a debate?

[Sam]

No, it was Hilary Duff.

[George]

Hilary Duff. Hilary Duff escaped the child star curse

[Sam]

in a crazy way.

[Kayla]

It's crazy.

[Sam]

Well, I'm sort of fascinated by her. My friend calls her a zero threat.

[Kayla]

Yeah. What does that mean?

[Sam]

She's not good at anything.

[George]

Oh, that's not true. She's a good actor.

[Sam]

That's true.

[Kayla]

She's a Good actor.

[George]

I do think she's a good actor.

[Sam]

She's good at younger.

[Kayla]

She's good at image creation. You know what I mean? Like, she, like, knows who she is. She knows how to play with her own Persona. That's something.

[George]

That is something. That's hard. That is something.

[Kayla]

I mean, now with the social media generation, that's more of a skill than, let's say, singing.

[George]

Yeah, absolutely. See, everyone can sing now, by the way.

[Kayla]

Pretty much everyone can sing.

[George]

Anyone could sing.

[Kayla]

Oh, you think it's a skill to learn piano?

[George]

Trying to bring.

[Kayla]

Managing your brand.

[George]

Having a brand is hard. Can I ask another question?

[Sam]

Please?

[Kayla]

Do you have.

[George]

Okay, I know you guys have separate partners. I know your friends.

[Sam]

No, we have the same one.

[George]

Did you guys ever have a moment, the two of you? Was there ever a moment?

[Kayla]

No.

[Sam]

God, no.

[George]

Sorry.

[Sam]

Okay. Not God, no.

[George]

I asked this on Lost Culture as well. I'm always interested with really close gay guy friends, if there was ever a moment. And then I saw one comment that someone was like, they hate when people ask this. And I'm like, okay, well, they're two gay guys. They need to get used to it.

[Kayla]

No one's ever asked us this for

[George]

the record, have they not?

[Kayla]

Never.

[George]

Oh, I think you guys would have such a cute moment if you'd ever had one. I know it's probably off the table.

[Sam]

We have talked about how funny would it be if we suddenly had sex?

[Kayla]

We would do it, Hillary. Like, for the image.

[George]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sam]

If you suddenly release a sex tape,

[George]

guys, I think that'd be electric. I think that'd be really electric.

[Kayla]

Just because, like, it would be. It would get the people talking, and that's, like, half the battle.

[George]

Also, you have to know, I'm sure your fans, fans of the show, please sound off in the comments. I'm sure there's a lot of them that are hoping for it. No, for sure.

[Sam]

People are writing slash fiction left and right.

[George]

Are they?

[Kayla]

But I think there's something they weirdly don't. No one ships us. I do. I think you're, like, one of two people, maybe.

[George]

I know there's more like me out there. I know there's more like me out there. I'm not alone.

[Kayla]

Because no one ever brings that up.

[Sam]

Well, I do think it takes some guts to bring it up. I think the fact that no one brings it up doesn't mean no one's thinking about it. I think Caleb is bringing it up because he kind of courts controversy in his sick. In his sick public Persona. He's Sort of the Howard Stern of gay comedy podcast.

[George]

Thank you for saying that. That was beautiful and powerful. Yeah.

[Kayla]

I'm like, what?

[Sam]

This is like how Robbie Hoffman once was like, I want to be the lesbian Joe Rogan to me. And I said, you're on your way. Oh, yeah.

[George]

Well, I wish. I wish her luck on that journey. I think. Howard Stern. Howard Stern of gay podcasters. Do you think that's really true of me, or you're being silly?

[Sam]

Oh, well, I don't think that's true of you. Not because you're not as talented and as successful, but because you're not as combative and, like, that's not what you do. I feel like you're not. You're not having people ride the Siby, and you're not having Florence come on and tell you, like, the most disgusting sex story she's ever.

[Kayla]

You don't do little sex pranks.

[George]

I don't, but we could if we wanted to right now. The three of us could have a really combative interview. I don't desire it, but I think electric. Can I say something about podcasting?

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

Randomly moving into a new space. Randomly. Sometimes when you're podcasting, you will fall into an accidental vibe that you can't get out of. And then sometimes you're just like, well, I hope we can cut 20 minutes of that episode.

[Sam]

No, it's crazy.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

And then.

[Sam]

And it's actually not that hard. Well. Because I'm always like, what if we reset? What if I actually had the courage to be like, you guys, take a deep breath. Let's start over. Yeah, but I feel like saying that would make things even more awkward.

[Kayla]

Well, it's sort of like, then you need a suggestion. Then you're like, let's do random word generator and just start talking about that.

[George]

Well, yeah, I know.

[Kayla]

It's just like, it's so hard to jump from one thing just out of nowhere. Yeah.

[Sam]

But then I don't. Of course, My instinct is always to bring up the only thing less. It's. I always want to talk about the one thing we're not allowed to talk about.

[George]

Yeah. Ooh. What do you mean? Like, the thing. Like, whatever the thing is in the room that you're like, this person doesn't want to talk about this. I do.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

That's really interesting.

[Kayla]

I want to go back to falling outs and confrontations.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Do you fall out? Do you have confrontations?

[George]

I have confrontation, but I don't fall out.

[Kayla]

Really? You keep going.

[George]

People. Look, the amount of time you Spend with any person in your life fluctuates and rotates. Like, there's. Sometimes that I'm really hanging out with this group of people. Sometimes I'm really hanging out with this group. It ebbs and flows, especially based on, like, when I moved. Like, I would say my LA friends. Like, I feel not distant, but I feel like, oh, we see each other so much less now.

[Kayla]

It's a little different.

[George]

But I'm big on conflict. I love conflict. I'm having it pretty often.

[Sam]

I. Well, I used to be like that, and then one too many times, people were like, you have to stop. Because I was raised on conflict. The other, actually, my mom was texting Matthew this morning or yesterday morning, and Matthew was like, your mom texted? My mom is planning my sister's wedding. And Matthew goes, your mom texted me, I'm this close to canceling the wedding. And he was, like, horrified. And I was like, no, that's how she speaks.

[Kayla]

Like, that's.

[Sam]

That's her having gotten one annoying email from the florist.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Like, she's not canceling the wedding. No one's in a fight. But it's like I grew up with every single thing was 0 to 100. My dad would come home and be like, our family is ruined three times a week. And it would be like, because taxes are due, it's like, yeah, everyone has to pay those.

[George]

Yeah. I love platonic conflict, like, among friends. I love. I love to pull. I love to. After a friend has said something that I didn't, like, be like. Just so you know. That kind of pissed me off. Yeah, I love. Because it's easier to just be like, that really pissed me off. I really want to say that again.

[Kayla]

Yeah. I think. I think maybe I'm more like that. I don't take the bait of what the thing that bothers me is. Like, some people will be like, okay, time to have a fight.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And I'm sort of like, hey, by the way, let's never say that again.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And then we're never talking about this.

[George]

Or someone will say something that upsets me, and I'll be like, we should change the subject before we get into a fight. You know what I mean? Like, I love to just. I'm saying what I feel for sure.

[Kayla]

I love to be like, so I heard you say that. That really implied a lot of this to me. Do you mean that?

[George]

Yeah. Oh, I like that. What did you mean by oh?

[Kayla]

That's just how I'm interpreting it.

[Sam]

I'm trying to think of you ever speaking like that.

[Kayla]

I feel like when we've had to, like, our.

[Sam]

Yes.

[George]

Talk about your conflicts, what has been your biggest fight? Be honest.

[Kayla]

Not biggest.

[Sam]

Really not.

[George]

I can think of.

[Kayla]

I can think of, like, one.

[Sam]

Is it early, early on.

[Kayla]

Early on.

[Sam]

But also clubcoming.

[Kayla]

That's the one I was thinking.

[Sam]

Okay.

[George]

Oh, I knew clubcoming would be a massive.

[Sam]

I can think of two. That fucking early, early on.

[George]

Very early.

[Kayla]

Yeah. Pre.

[Sam]

When I. Pre. Pre. Pre what? Pre Podcast, even launching.

[George]

Oh, okay.

[Sam]

We just had a sort of miscommunication where I feel like I was kind of. Without realizing it, being. I. I would say. I'm trying not to say they were condescending. Cause that's not what I was being.

[Kayla]

No, it was more like. You're talking about, like, the editing thing.

[Sam]

No, I'm talking about in the beginning, we were having a call, and you

[George]

were like, oh, God, I'm so alive right now.

[Sam]

You know, I was being sort of like a. Know it all. But then, like, I would drop the ball, and it would be okay. But then when you drop the ball, I'd be like, so you did drop the ball.

[George]

Oh.

[Sam]

And then at clubcoming, what happened was I was just. I sometimes think that the most comedic thing you can do is be mean.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And we were, like, literally on stage, and I was like, sam, that shirt sucks. It was just, like, not. And I didn't even believe it.

[George]

I thought the shirt was. Tell me about the shirt you're wearing. Yeah, no, no.

[Sam]

But it was in no way based in truth. It was just like, I'm trying to, like, think of something to say, and I'm like, roast Battle.

[Kayla]

Also, like, at that point. At that point.

[Sam]

At that point, I'm Lisa Lampanel.

[Kayla]

At that point, we. In our podcast, we thought it was funny to have tense conversations, but we'd never, like, turn on each other necessarily. But we love to be like, we're tense. Things are weird. There's awkward pauses. And then so we did this clubcoming hosting thing, and George kept negging me, and I would sort of be like, hey, let's move on from this. Let's move on. And you would. He would, like, kind of dig in. Again, be honest.

[George]

Did the shirt thing hit you like a knife?

[Kayla]

Oh, it was bad.

[Sam]

I literally. I remember. I remember the shirt thing specifically because I knew Sam thought I was. There was some truth to it. And I literally. I don't even remember. Like, I literally had no opinions on the shirt. Like, I just was looking for something to comment on, and it was the first thing in front of me. And then from my perspective, I will admit that I was being. That I could have handled it better. But from my perspective, what was happening is that I was throwing out topics and Sam was not. Yes. Sanding. Like, like. Cause in my mind, I was like,

[George]

when I say you look like shit

[Sam]

tonight, it's like, then you fight back, fight back, fight back.

[George]

Now you get me.

[Sam]

Stand up for yourself. That was like, six years ago.

[Kayla]

Well, we got off stage and I was like, hey, that really was not good for me.

[Sam]

But the thing is, then we slept to keep posting the show. So I was like, we will have this conversation later. I fully hear you, but right now we have to make up immediately. I was like, give me a hug right this second. Because someone is on stage and we have to go back and, like, introduce the next person. Like, we're hosting a show. Yeah. There's no time, of course, but obviously I see your perspective. Yeah. Yeah. So that was our last fight.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

That was your last fight.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

I really don't want to jinx that. I. I fear the evil eye. And I'm like, if we keep talking about how we're such good co workers and friends, like, literally tomorrow something will happen and we will never speak.

[Kayla]

Also, literally, whenever you bring up old fights, it, no matter what creates, like, a second little fight, it always creates a new version of it.

[George]

I think so.

[Sam]

I would say I do think so. Early on, especially, like, Covid Zoom recordings, there would be some recordings where, like, the podcast didn't go super well. And it's like, it's not either of our faults, but it's just like, damn, we couldn't get it. We couldn't get to the flow state. And that was frustrating. But I usually blame myself, though I rarely would blame Sam in that. I would be like, I did it especially for the podcast. I usually blame myself.

[George]

If it's not funny, it's really hard. I feel like I have never been able to quite explain because, like, Shelby Wolstein and I had keeping records that I adore. Shelby. I loved that podcast. And hosting a podcast with someone specifically is so difficult and, like, intricate. And they're the hardest part for me, a lot of times about it was when we would walk away feeling differently about an episode. And that's true of, like, shows in general. Yeah, that would happen on tour too, where, like, we would come up, like, my last tour, we would come off stage and, like, maybe Chance in Virginia would be like, God, what a fucking show. And I'd Be like, I fucking hated that one. You know what I mean? And they'd be like, oh, my God, we thought it was so electric. And I would just be like. That would make me feel so distant. And I'm like, why are you not feeling what I felt? And it's like, well, because you're different people. You showed up different tonight. You had a different thing this afternoon. You got different amounts of sleep. That is really fucking hard.

[Kayla]

That's the most relatable thing I've ever heard. We do that all the time.

[Sam]

We've recently gotten way more calm about it, I think, just because, like, the more shows you do, the less a single one matters. But, like, in the beginning, there were shows where one of us would be in a terrible mood the entire rest of the night.

[George]

Yeah, I feel guilt when I. When I don't feel like. I don't feel embarrassed or anything. I'm like, whatever. A bad show is, whatever. There's a million shows. I feel guilt that I'm like, fuck. Those people, like, paid money and, like, made. They came here tonight. Like, it might be the only fun thing they get to do all month or, God forbid, even longer. And I'm like, fuck. I feel like. I just feel guilt that I'm like, God damn it, I didn't do it.

[Sam]

I felt that way. I did these two shows in London recently, and I felt like especially one of them really didn't go well. And I. In my mind, and no one could convince me otherwise. I was like, this was my London debut. I flopped. Like, the UK is not in my wheelhouse. I have been rejected. Like, forget Fringe.

[George]

This was a wholesale referendum on me completely. And I flopped.

[Sam]

And I mean, literally, like, the audience was representatives from each demographic of England.

[George]

Yeah, it's a flop.

[Sam]

And they all decided not for us.

[Kayla]

Maybe I can be an Irish comedian, but not a British one.

[Sam]

Oh, I would kill in Ireland, to be clear.

[George]

Let's be very clear. That's quite clear.

[Sam]

Sally Rooney would be front row. She would be gagging. Laugh, laugh, laughing.

[Dr. Joy]

This is Dr. Joy from therapy for Black Girls. If you could enjoy a spotless space without so much scrubbing, wouldn't you? Of course you would. Well, I've got you. Dawn Power Wash Dish Spray cuts through the mess and gets everything clean in half the time. We're talking about both the toughest messes and everyday dishes. Plus, its work goes beyond the sink, like, to clean counters, stoves, grills, and to remove stains on laundry. And it's really good at getting those hard to clean dishes. So basically, Dawn Power Wash cleans everything from dishes to grills, removing all the grease and grime and does it twice as fast. Not bad. You can find Dawn Powerwash Dish Spray at your favorite retailer. Dawn is a proud sponsor of the Elton John Impact Awards, honoring those who have helped shape a more inclusive and compassionate world with their artistry, advocacy and unwavering commitment to equality. And we like to take this opportunity to congratulate all of this year's deserving honorees. You won't want to miss the Elton John Impact Awards podcast, available on June 1st on the iHeartRadio app and everywhere podcasts are heard did you know you

[Mistr Ad Voice]

can get your prep for free? Prep is a once daily pill that's up to 99% effective at preventing the transmission of HIV. Mistr makes it easy and free to get started all online. No doctor's office, no paperwork. They also provide free Doxy Pep, a simple antibiotic you take after sex to help prevent certain STIs. Kind of like morning after pillow for STIs. Whether you have insurance or not, mistr's got you covered in three easy steps. 1. Sign [e-mail] 2. Consult with a licensed doctor online and 3 complete your at home testing kit. Then your medication is delivered discreetly right to your door. It's safe, easy and completely judgment free. Protect yourself and protect each other. Sign [e-mail] today dozens of executive orders,

[Lambda Legal Ad Voice]

thousands of anti LGBTQ bills, all designed to harm people we know, people we love, the people we are. Every day Lambda Legal is in court fighting back and when we take a stand, we're standing as the last line of defense between real human beings and harm. But we don't do it alone. With every act of support you stand with us and together we'll hold the line. Fund the [e-mail] Donate

[Ad Read Announcer]

support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year. You can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S P500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like ETFs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. Portfolio that's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com disclosures.

[Sam]

Should we do our first segment?

[Kayla]

Yes. Do you want to introduce it?

[Sam]

Of course, yes. We have a first segment and it's called Straight Shooters and this is a segment where we give you a series of rapid fire questions. You choose this thing or this other thing. Easy to gauge your familiarity with and complicity and straight culture. And the one rule is you can't ask any follow up questions about how the game works. You have to sit in the uncertainty.

[George]

Great Caleb.

[Kayla]

Small but mighty or tall but right wing?

[George]

Small but mighty.

[Sam]

TJ Maxx or Andy Sax?

[George]

Andy Sachs.

[Kayla]

A redwood forest or a gay men's chorus?

[George]

Gay men's chorus.

[Sam]

Singing the blues, rocking those shoes or not shopping, just here to peruse.

[George]

Not shopping, just here to peruse.

[Kayla]

Inshallah or Met Gala.

[George]

Inshallah.

[Sam]

Good choice.

[George]

Can you imagine?

[Sam]

Oh my God.

[George]

Actually fucking people. Met Gala. Yeah.

[Sam]

Touching the art or smelling a fart?

[George]

Touching the art.

[Kayla]

Mamma mia. 2 Here we go again. Or I must see you soon because Pier, you are my friend.

[George]

The second one. The second one.

[Sam]

Pass that puss Clock that T sissy that walk park that car Drop that phone Sleep on the floor or dream about me.

[George]

Um. Dream about me.

[Kayla]

Beautiful.

[George]

Wow. Wow. And I'm happy with all my answers.

[Sam]

Yeah, I think they were really good. Although I have to say the comment I'm happy with all my answers took me out of it. He said he's too confident.

[George]

No, I liked my answers.

[Sam]

He said, you are being like, you know, sort of like Nicki Minaj. I'm the best rapper alive right now.

[George]

You need to sit in the uncertainty of the game, George. You need to sit. You need to sit in uncertainty. I will not give what my mom wrote to you.

[Sam]

My own game.

[George]

You need to sit in the uncertainty of what I might say.

[Sam]

Your score is getting lower by the second, my friend.

[George]

My score?

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Are you guys scoring me?

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

No.

[Kayla]

Come on. Yeah. We rate our guests on a scale of 0 to 1000 doves based on the Lady Gaga song from Chromatica. 1000 doves.

[George]

Right now. Be honest. No, I'm not familiar.

[Sam]

Well, there's a song called 1000 Doves from the album Chromatica.

[Kayla]

You would hate it.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Sam]

I would say when you were finished, you were like, at a. You were like 950 out of a thousand. Yeah, I would say now you're hovering around 800.

[George]

You know that I did not lose 150 for that. This is a sick podcast. You guys are sick.

[Sam]

Malevolent is your score.

[George]

You took me less than 800 for that?

[Sam]

You're being combative.

[Kayla]

George is cruel.

[George]

I have to about my score. Wait, question about that song. Is it like gay guy, car crash music or like. What? No, no, no.

[Sam]

You.

[Kayla]

It's more like it Bena. Like sort of bland gay dance.

[Sam]

Do you know what it's like? It's like if a ballad was remixed. Yeah, it's Professional Widow by Tori Amos. Remix version.

[Kayla]

Yeah. It's very H and M core.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

How close have both of you gotten to becoming DJs and be 100% honest?

[Sam]

Well, you know what's crazy? This calendar year, I thought to myself, I want to take a DJ class.

[Kayla]

It calls to me. It calls to me in a huge way.

[George]

I get closer every day.

[Kayla]

It's just. I know I would be good at it.

[George]

Every time I go somebody's, that music is being played. And I'm not vibing with the music. I'm going, fucking put me in the booth. If that's what it takes, I'll throw the dance parties in this town.

[Kayla]

Are you putting on music at the Friend Hang? Are you in charge of the music at the Friend Hang?

[George]

A lot of times. And guess what? Not a lot of people are loving it. I'm putting on Nathaniel Ratelist. I'm putting on Gregory Allen Isakoff. Passing the joint and being like, everyone

[Sam]

chill out, you know? At my wedding, a professional music critic complimented the playlist that I co created.

[George]

I'm taking some dubs away from you for that.

[Kayla]

Thank you.

[George]

I'm removing some of your dubs for that. Thank you. I'm removing some of your dubs for bringing that up. Who was the music critic?

[Sam]

Joe Coscarelli from the New York Times.

[George]

Wow. In a very venerable publication as well.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Well, I'll just interview Taylor Swift.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

I will say their music coverage is confusing.

[Sam]

I don't know if I agree with it. Well, honey, I would say their foreign policy coverage is no less confusing.

[George]

You. Congratulations on your wedding, by the way.

[Sam]

Thank you. And Sam got married, too. Do you want to say Congratulations.

[George]

Congratulations on your wedding.

[Kayla]

Thank you.

[Sam]

More recently, in fact, I did.

[George]

I don't think I remembered because it wasn't brought up to me.

[Sam]

Whereas I kind of bring it up. I brought up three times.

[George]

I don't think I was invited to either of them. And so my congratulations are kind of contingent and lukewarm based on that.

[Kayla]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[George]

And I want to thank you both for not inviting me. I do not like weddings.

[Kayla]

I actually feel a huge relief, generally speaking, when I'm not invited to a wedding.

[Sam]

Oh, my God. Me too.

[Kayla]

I'm like, thank God.

[George]

Yes.

[Sam]

Ugh.

[Kayla]

I mean, don't get me wrong. If it's down the street, I'll be jealous. Yeah. But if it's in another. If I have to get on a flight, I don't want to go.

[George]

Every wedding hangs on my calendar like a root canal.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

I don't want to go. I don't.

[Kayla]

Beautiful sentence.

[George]

I'm so sorry. Thank you.

[Sam]

You were literally Fiona Apple.

[Kayla]

That was easy.

[Sam]

That was full Fiona Apple, by the way. You are.

[Kayla]

When the pawn hangs on my calendar

[George]

like a root canal, it just weighs down the entire.

[Sam]

Every wedding hangs on my calendar like a root canal.

[Kayla]

You guys, that's crazy.

[George]

Some doves may chance.

[Sam]

I'm going up to 8, 28, 20 dance.

[George]

Nice.

[Sam]

Wow.

[George]

Really? Yeah. I don't want to talk too much about the doves, but just tough to learn that you can lose, like, 152 doves for. Yeah. It's just hard to understand the math of the doves, obviously.

[Kayla]

But of course, it's. It's complicated.

[George]

I don't want you hung up on

[Sam]

it because the idea that you think it's math rather than art, poetry, more divine, feminine based rather than kind of rationality.

[George]

Do you know what's so funny? I don't know why that made me think of this, but I was at the. I was at a museum in Spain looking at a piece of artwork, crying. I was so moved. Okay. Pulled out my phone to take a picture of the. Not even the artwork of the description so I could remember the artist. I'm a little dumb. And a man who works in a museum sprints over to me. Old man sprints over to me and goes, no photos. Are you kidding me? And I went, I'm mid. Tier. Like, literally, like, having a moment. And I was like, I'm so sorry. What? And he was like, the sign. And there was a sign that said, no photos. And I was like, I'm sorry. I've just never experienced that at a museum. In my entire life. My bad. And he was like, delete it. And I was like, no, I'll put my phone away. And I put my phone away. And then he followed me for a couple seconds.

[Kayla]

Really?

[George]

Isn't that crazy? I've never been. It's a thing where, like, I was in such a spiritual, personal moment and ripped out of it by a man who. And I never want to hear from a man, by the way. Men should not speak to me unless I have engaged them first. A man should never cold speak to me. And he's yelling at me, screaming at me.

[Kayla]

The only way a man should speak to you at a museum is he should come stand next to you and go, beautiful, isn't it?

[George]

Yeah. And he should be single. Age appropriate.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

Yes.

[Kayla]

And then he goes, I'm not talking about that.

[Sam]

The artwork that made you cry was of course, one of Warhol's Marilyn Monroe Britons, Correct?

[George]

No, it was one of the cans.

[Sam]

It was one of the soup Campbells.

[George]

It was one of the Campbell soup cans.

[Sam]

You were crying, balling. You'd never seen anything like it before.

[George]

Tears. The commentary.

[Sam]

What is this style called?

[George]

Yeah, who is this?

[Sam]

Who is this?

[George]

I didn't recognize. I said, who is this? Yeah.

[Sam]

You know, one time someone told me his favorite artist is Jeff Koontz.

[George]

That would make me fucking. That would send me into a murderous rage.

[Sam]

He has no idea that I've been thinking about this for six years. Every single time I see him, I think, remember, like, in my mind, I'm like Jeff Koons.

[George]

I genuinely think you should be able to kill that person and get off. Like, you should have to have a trial and go to court and everything.

[Sam]

I like him. He's a friend of mine.

[George]

The jury should let you off for that. That's crazy.

[Sam]

I know. I'll tell you later.

[George]

Yeah, you'll tell me as well, right?

[Sam]

Yeah. Well, you don't know.

[George]

But, I mean, I'll look him up.

[Sam]

He's not gonna be mad at him. Let's go kill him tonight.

[George]

Let's kill him. No, I just. That's so egregious. I don't like that. And I'm really someone who's kind of like, there's a pot for every kettle.

[Kayla]

Yeah, of course.

[George]

Everybody do your thing. Like, I don't care. But that really pisses me off.

[Sam]

Do you know what that reminded me of just now? My own story is that sort of. Kind of pre Azealia Banks becoming, you know, right wing or whatever. A few years ago, I posted one of the. Oh, you know what it was? It was like someone's doing best albums of the 2010s or something. And I was like, broke with expensive taste. Like, great album. And then someone responded to my story and goes, yeah, I still listen to 212. I said, right, right, right.

[Kayla]

So, like, so does everyone know that's

[Sam]

the one everyone knows?

[George]

Right.

[Lambda Legal Ad Voice]

Of course.

[George]

That makes sense. Due to its popularity.

[Sam]

That's not so.

[Kayla]

That's like, the one that's inescapable. Like, even if you weren't trying to listen to it, you'd hear it once a day.

[George]

Like, call me crazy, but I'm streaming. Cowboy Carter.

[Sam]

Right?

[George]

Massively popular. Like Viv. Yeah, we know.

[Kayla]

Oh, that's tough.

[George]

That is tough.

[Sam]

So, Caleb, first of all, I love the colorway on your sneakers.

[George]

Thank you. They're so comfy.

[Sam]

Do you think it's too late for me to get a pair of those? I mean, not those exact ones, but you know how Solomon's. It's like every day. You're like, every day.

[George]

The clock is ticking.

[Sam]

How long is it gonna last?

[George]

Yeah, no, it is not too late. Also, I wish you would buy the exact pair. Anytime someone buys exactly something that I've worn, I take it as the most sincere compliment. If you buy this exact pair, it would just, like, make me feel so affirmed, I would maybe almost cry. Okay. No, it's not too late. I got these pretty recently. Like, way after. I'll be honest. This is my thing with trends, especially fashion trends, because I'm not very fashionable. Most fashion trends, when I see them, I go, that is so stupid.

[Sam]

Me too.

[George]

I would never. I can't believe this is. And then it goes on long enough to where the cool people are past it. And I'm like, I'm low key, digging. I'm like, specifically with fashion. I'm a bit of a sheep.

[Sam]

No, I am, too.

[George]

I'm a follower.

[Kayla]

I'm definitely a sheep. I've definitely sort of in that place right now where I'm like, have I ever had an original thought? Or am I just sort of copying what people are doing around me?

[Sam]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

You know, it gets so complicated.

[George]

Fashion or in general?

[Kayla]

Mostly in fashion.

[George]

Okay, that's nice. I wanted it to be localized.

[Kayla]

That's good. Because when I. When I'm like, okay, I hate all my clothes, it's time to buy something new. I'm sort of like, I'm gonna change everything. And then I'll just be like, no, I'm gonna get whatever everyone else is Wearing, like, it's time to just sort of do what everyone else is doing.

[Sam]

Yeah. Sometimes I'm like, I'm gonna do something crazy, and it's. Do you mean getting selvedge denim?

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Because that's ultimately what I'm gonna do.

[George]

Yeah. I want you to be crazy in that way.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

And I think you guys are trendsetters, and I think, look, whatever you wear is cool because you're wearing it. And I really believe in both of you. And if you want to get these sneakers, I think you would look fabulous in them. And also, I'm wondering, what are you guys most afraid of?

[Sam]

Wait, hold on.

[Kayla]

And I want to say one more thing before I respond to that.

[George]

Yeah. Fish.

[Kayla]

Mostly. I hate them. Are you serious?

[George]

I want to come back.

[Sam]

You are having a thing with fish.

[George]

What's going on with fish?

[Kayla]

I think you're gonna swim into my mouth and I'm gonna choke and die.

[George]

I beg your pardon.

[Kayla]

Yes.

[Sam]

The other day that the. In fact, he said this on air, that the food of the summer is going to be fish.

[George]

Sam, you can't have it both ways. You're trying to have your cake and eat.

[Kayla]

No.

[Sam]

You know, he wants to dom the fish before they dom him. He's saying, don't swim into my mouth. I'm going to eat you.

[Kayla]

But I also said that. But the fish, I don't want to eat them. But they are on all the food. People are putting them on everything.

[George]

Fish.

[Sam]

Oh, you were just objectively observing a trend rather than saying, I want fish.

[Kayla]

And every time they come on the food, I say, ugh, I got to eat this fish now.

[George]

Fish is everywhere right now.

[Kayla]

It's everywhere.

[George]

It's having a total moment.

[Kayla]

George, I wanted to say that you've been having this conversation specifically about. About getting these shoes for about two years.

[Sam]

I know.

[George]

Get them. Get them. It's time. Actually, what size are you?

[Sam]

Nine and a half.

[George]

Okay. Why did you pause? Were you not sure, or were you scared to shave?

[Kayla]

Were you shy?

[Sam]

I was not scared to. Well, I do have trauma from. I have trauma from when I was a kid.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

You know the thing of, you know, people being like, if you have small feet, you have a small dick. Of course, I had not gone through puberty. I had, for my age, small feet at one point.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And I was. At some point, that was said to me, yeah. Of like, that means you have a small dick. I was like, yeah, I do. Because, again, I'm prepubescent.

[Kayla]

Hello.

[Sam]

But that has, like, stayed with me and now. And I have, like, a weird insecurity about, like, shoe size.

[Kayla]

I can't believe you just admitted you had a small dick as a child.

[George]

Yeah. Disgusting. Can I tell you, I have trauma with that expression as well, because I've always had really big feet, and I have never had a big dick. And I thought when I was in, like, middle school and everyone's dicks were getting bigger, my dick got only a little bit bigger. It was like, kind of the size it was gonna be. And then I was like, what the fuck? I got so mad. Cause the whole time having big feet, I was like, my dick's gonna get huge someday, and I'm gonna be a guy with a huge dick. And then, lo and behold, I had to get really good at other stuff. It just totally sucked. I was like, the promise of the big dick, it was promised to me.

[Sam]

Well, because you were also. It was seen as, like, the scientific thing of, like.

[Kayla]

Yeah. It was fact.

[Sam]

Yeah. Foot size. And then also, like, people doing this. If you do an L with your fingers, your dick is from thumb to pointer finger.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And people will be like, that's science.

[George]

What Can't. Because some people have 12 inch dicks.

[Sam]

Exactly.

[George]

Which, by the way, is egregious.

[Kayla]

It's too much.

[George]

I don't like it when guys are bragging about. When guys on Grindr especially are like, 11 inch dick. I'm like, great, leave me alone.

[Kayla]

Well, I am like, so it's a prop, Right?

[George]

What would you do with it?

[Kayla]

What would you do?

[Sam]

Look at it.

[George]

I mean, they are fun to look at, but it's like, no. The promise of the big dick never came to my door. And that truly was devastating to me. I started to question everything not soon after. Not too long after that, I started to question religion. And it wasn't related. But you have to really think about that.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Because you were like, if there was a God, he would have given me a huge cock.

[George]

Or smaller feet. Either give me smaller feet or a huge dick, one way or another. But I'm tired of living like this.

[Sam]

If anything, it's proof of the existence of God, that he has a playfulness rather than everything being scientific.

[George]

I guess. I guess. If you're into that kind of thing. But I'm not really into that. I believe good people get rewards and bad people go to hell.

[Sam]

The other day, Max Witter was like. We were talking about something, and I was like, I struggle with people who believe. I'm sorry. In astrology, I struggle because it's not for me.

[George]

Okay. Max Woodard said this.

[Sam]

No, no, I said this.

[Kayla]

Okay.

[Sam]

And then Max goes, yeah. It's like how I struggle with people who believe in. And he was like, do you believe in God? And I paused for a second. I was like, I don't believe in Judeo Christian God, but, you know, do I know everything about the world? No, I was trying to say that, but I took literally one breath. And then Max goes, see? Exactly. I can't talk about this.

[Kayla]

Yeah, that sounds about right.

[Sam]

That I had to be, like, defending myself about, like, my non religious beliefs.

[George]

But what is your belief on God? You have. You have a belief on God.

[Kayla]

Mine's similar to that one.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

I feel like it's the exact same thing.

[Sam]

Well, I went through a very militant atheist phase when I was a teenager, obviously, because I have a brain.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And I was literally like, Richard Dawkins is bae.

[Kayla]

No, for sure.

[Sam]

Christopher Hitchens. I bought that book.

[Kayla]

I never read it.

[Sam]

Yeah, same. No, never read it in my life.

[Kayla]

But God, to hold it.

[Sam]

Literally. No, I Literally. Where did I. Where did I first come into contact with him? Real Time with Bill Maher.

[Kayla]

Hello.

[George]

I loved Bill Maher when I was an atheist.

[Sam]

The best.

[George]

Yeah, it was tough. I was a really insufferable person.

[Sam]

No, it was crazy. I joined. I tried to join the atheist group at my college, and then I went there. I said, everyone here is ugly.

[Kayla]

That's tough.

[Sam]

I don't belong here.

[George]

Yeah, it's not you.

[Sam]

It's not me.

[George]

That's not your story.

[Sam]

So point being, my wishy washiness about religion and spirituality now is almost a reaction to. I went too far in that direction. I'm not gonna be a militant atheist, so I'm just like, whatever goes.

[Kayla]

I also have this thing right now where I'm sort of like, who knows where I'll be in 15 years.

[Sam]

Totally.

[Kayla]

What if I get bonked on the head?

[Sam]

I love talking about head bonking.

[Kayla]

Yeah. It's gonna happen for me. Something's gonna go horribly wrong, and I'm gon. I'm devout now.

[Sam]

It's gonna be like. I feel pretty stirring. Amy Schumer with religion.

[Kayla]

I'm just like, who knows?

[George]

You think?

[Sam]

So what's your relationship to religion?

[Kayla]

Oh, love. Yeah.

[George]

Love them all.

[Sam]

Were you raised religious?

[George]

Well, yeah, I was raised Christian.

[Sam]

Like, what kind?

[George]

Baptist.

[Kayla]

Okay.

[Sam]

I was raised Greek Orthodox.

[George]

Thank you for your service. By the way, our dances, I would say. Yeah, same. Same thing. I'm like, I don't really believe in, like, a guy, and this Guy who makes decisions about things. But I think that generally there's a force in the universe that I think most people are good. I think we're fundamentally good. And I genuinely kind of generally believe that, like, there's a force that pushes us towards love.

[Sam]

That I would.

[George]

I would say we're referring to the same thing when people call that God. And I'm fine with that.

[Mistr Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

I can believe in heaven.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Hell is a no go for me.

[Sam]

You do believe in heaven?

[George]

I can believe in heaven, Sure. I think that's nice. Why not? I think that's nice. Hell is an absolute no for me.

[Kayla]

Yeah. I don't want to feel like there's punishment potential.

[George]

It doesn't make any fucking sense.

[Mistr Ad Voice]

No.

[George]

Heaven, Hell doesn't make any. This was really what undid Christianity for me not to have that kind of podcast.

[Kayla]

Yeah. This is weird.

[George]

Really, what it was for me is I was like, you're telling me every Jewish person goes to hell? Every. Every Hindu person, every. Like, that doesn't make any fucking sense. There would at least need to be concession.

[Kayla]

Right, right, right.

[George]

It really fucked me up.

[Sam]

I guess. I was never taught that. I feel like it was always, if you are basically moral, you go to heaven.

[George]

See? And that was not what was going on in my woods. Missouri was moving a little different.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

You never said your biggest fear, and

[Sam]

I'm wondering why my biggest fear? Let's see.

[Kayla]

Oh, can't say.

[George]

Fish. It's already taken.

[Kayla]

Fish is taken.

[Sam]

They're gonna swim in your mouth.

[Kayla]

You're choking.

[Sam]

Die. You're swimming.

[Kayla]

Like your mouth.

[Sam]

Pure, pure loneliness. Like complete isolation.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Okay, I have another one.

[George]

Birds. Okay, we've got fish. Pure loneliness. Birds. Loving the mixture.

[Sam]

What's yours?

[George]

Are you lonely?

[Sam]

I'm not. I wouldn't. It's not that I feel it knocking at my door, but I feel actually like I am. I've always. I value my relationships and connections. And when I think of what my idea of hell is, it's like being completely solitary in a room by myself. It's just my fear. It's not that I'm.

[George]

It's not that I can now imagine there's fishing birds there.

[Sam]

It's not that I feel lonely. It's like, what if everyone I know died? Like, that's scary.

[Kayla]

Yeah, no, that's legit scary.

[George]

That one's tough.

[Kayla]

That one's really tough. I think something that scares me sometimes is that sometimes I'm like, God, I'd be so much happier if I were to. Compared Completely alone. Like, when I'm. Sometimes when I'm texting, I'm like, God, I wish. I wish I didn't know this person.

[George]

That is so beautiful.

[Sam]

That is so beautiful that rivals hang on my calendar. Like,

[George]

that is so beautiful. Sometimes when I'm texting, I wish I didn't know this person. Beautiful to me, completely beautiful.

[Sam]

I actually had a sim similar but different experience of I was on Instagram and I see the first four stories I would watch if I clicked, you know, like the first four people in the top bar. And I just thought to myself, I don't respect any of these four people. No, I don't like them. They have nothing to offer. I follow them out of pure social, reciprocal whatever. And yet I'm gonna. I'm about to do it.

[Kayla]

And here I go.

[Sam]

I'm about to watch all four. And one is gonna be sort of like, new haircut. One is gonna be promoting a comedy show in a city I don't live in. One is gonna be someone, you know, posting the new Pink Panthers. And one is gonna be, you know, a close friend story. That's like, looking for work.

[George]

Oh, yeah. I hate when people are looking for work.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Enough.

[George]

So much to say.

[Sam]

I don't. I'm not.

[Kayla]

Keep it to yourself.

[Sam]

I'm not hiring. Take me off.

[George]

I can't help you. Sorry.

[Kayla]

What's yours?

[George]

My biggest fear. Oh, gosh. I guess probably that I'm wrong about all the God stuff. That would be a nightmare. Could you imagine? I get there and he's like, okay, you talked a lot of shit, brother.

[Sam]

How much of a gag would it be if God was literally traditional Bible God after all of this? Yeah, man of the beard. Man with the beard after every beard.

[George]

Literally a God.

[Sam]

Noah's ark was real.

[Kayla]

That was the kind of.

[George]

Do you know what's crazy? This is the closest I get to sounding like a narcissistic sociopath is that I actually. I mean, this is insane. I actually have thought, like, low key. If it turns out to be that and I get like a conference with him, I think I can make my case. Do you know what I'm saying? Like, I know.

[Kayla]

I know exactly what you're saying.

[George]

I talked mad shit on you down there. I totally didn't believe in your entire thing. I thought your son was fake. Like, I fucking legit. Apologize. That is my bad. You have to understand, I was coming at it from a creative place. I literally think I could be like, brother, like, come on, you made me, like, low key. I'm your son.

[Kayla]

You made me like this.

[George]

You made me. And, like, look, you shouldn't have put me gay in Missouri. Like, I probably would have if you would have made me straight in Connecticut. I bet I would have stuck with the whole thing.

[Kayla]

Oh, my God. You would be such a good religious person.

[George]

I'd be literally a Republican senator, and it would be, oh, my God, you'd

[Kayla]

be good at that.

[George]

I know, and that's what I'm saying. That's what I would say to him, is I would be like, dude, like, it's clearly nothing personal. I had my own going on down there. Let's put it behind us. I would love to be in service of you now in heaven. Please don't send me to hell. I'm so fucked. Or at least not forever. Even if he was like, a little bit of hell, I'd be like, fair is fair. Yeah, send me to hell for a stint.

[Sam]

But then I feel like he would either. He would either really see where you're coming from, or he would be like, you would do well in hell.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

He'd be like, I know it seems bad.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

But your whole vibe.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Would crush.

[George]

Do you know what my guess, my biggest fear?

[Sam]

You'd be like, the mayor of hell.

[George]

My. And I do. I do think that my biggest fear is that I will get to heaven. It'll be traditional. God.

[Kayla]

Well, yeah.

[George]

I'll make my case and I'll be like, you have to understand, like, I was going through a lot down there. Like, obviously, let's put it behind us. Like, I feel sick to my stomach right now. I feel so stupid. I'm legit. So fucking sorry about that. Yeah. Please, please, please, please just let me go straight to heaven. And then God is gonna go. I really feel for you. Things were crazy down there. No big deal. You have to go to hell for a little bit. And I'm gonna be like, that is completely fair. Thank you. Completely, totally. Thank you for, like, hearing me out. And then he sends me to hell and never brings me back to heaven.

[Kayla]

Oh, no.

[George]

And I'm in hell the whole time being, like, any minute now, I'm getting out of this, and I'm just always in hell. And that would be uniquely hell for me. Do you know what I mean?

[Sam]

You're right.

[Kayla]

Waiting to leave because I go to hell.

[George]

It's like, okay, I'm in hell. Like. Like. Like, this completely sucks.

[Kayla]

Let's settle in, though. I'm stuck.

[George]

But it's like, I'm in hell.

[Sam]

You know what? That do you remember the feeling when you were a kid and you don't have an idea of, like, how time works, of being like, have we been here for seven hours?

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Being like, in the waiting room for pediatrician or something and being like, oh,

[George]

my, will we never leave here again?

[Sam]

And that. And that is a feeling that as an adult. They're arresting us as an adult. You at least have. You're like, I can see how long it's been.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

I have a really positive version of that, though. Once when I was, like, a child.

[George]

Sorry. Can't wait.

[Sam]

This is crazy.

[George]

Sorry. There is terrorist activity going on outside the windows.

[Kayla]

Podcasting through it all.

[George]

Please tell us what's going on with you in time. Yeah, someone. People are desperately hurt out there, but tell us about what's going on with you in time.

[Kayla]

Look, it's New York City. People are hit by cars all the time. It's fine.

[George]

That means that many sirens for one person hit by a car. Crazy.

[Kayla]

Someone just check the news. Somebody open Twitter before I say anything.

[George]

Someone search Twitter. New York event now.

[Kayla]

New York terrorism.

[Sam]

I found out about the virus on the cruise because I saw a tweet about a gay guy who tweeted about it.

[George]

That is one of the best ways to learn about news. By the way, Gay guys are always trying to be the first one to have a take.

[Sam]

It was literally someone making fun of a gay guy being like, the cruise is obviously difficult, but they're taking good care of us. And there was a picture of his plate, and it had filet mignon.

[George]

I wouldn't mind that at all.

[Kayla]

That's fun.

[Sam]

Sorry, go ahead.

[Kayla]

So basically, the thing with time was, no, the sirens is not. I feel comfortable speaking flippantly. I remember one time I was a little kid, and it was summer, and I was like, oh, no, school's starting soon. And then my parents were like, it's July. And I was like, wait, that's awesome. I was sure, like, all the summer had passed. It was only July.

[George]

You had so much summer left.

[Kayla]

So much.

[George]

That's beautiful, Sam.

[Kayla]

It was the best feeling. I think about it all the time because I'm like, I wish I could have that again. Just. Can't you just to be worried that it's coming tomorrow and it's actually still July?

[Sam]

No, it's like waking up and realizing your alarm hasn't gone off.

[George]

That is special. Yeah, I guess that's really special. I can't stop thinking about God. I really hope that if he's listening, I hope he just Understands what I'm going through down here. Do you know what I mean?

[Sam]

No, I do know what you mean.

[George]

I've got my own shit going on.

[Sam]

You know what my feeling about Christian God has always been? I feel like I could befriend his assistant.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

God himself I don't think I would connect with. I'm not gonna have a meeting with the head of Amazon, but I know that some associate. Associate. Associate producer listens to the podcast.

[Kayla]

Yeah. That chica in development.

[Sam]

I'm like, I'm gonna find the chica in development of Heaven, and I'm gonna harm her. And I actually think it speaks very well of you and your confidence that you actually think you can convince God. I'm not even attempting that.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

I'm finding the middle manager.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

She's just trying to feed her children.

[George]

I want to win her over, too.

[Kayla]

Yeah, but.

[Sam]

But. But I think you're like. You're like, that's easy. Like, you're like, I've already won her over. She listens to the pod.

[George]

I want to win her over. I want all of. I want everyone in heaven to love me, and I want to get in. If it turns out to be real. If it turns out to be real, it's obviously like, wow, I'm in a bad way.

[Sam]

Totally.

[George]

You know, that's one of the big things about religion. That's how they really get you.

[Kayla]

Yeah, that's tough.

[George]

But at the end of the day, fuck it. We ball. Like, I'm doing my thing.

[Kayla]

Literally, all we can do is, like, fucking party.

[Sam]

It's also like, the context of all of this is, like, all three of us were raised some level of Christian. It's equally likely that some other religion is real. And, like, we're all in the same boat.

[George]

I really.

[Sam]

And I actually like that as a possibility more because I'm like, oh, perfect. I don't even have the context for this. Put me wherever. Like, I'll go where the category other is.

[Kayla]

Yeah. Yeah.

[George]

I think I can really handle you die and nothing ever happens. Like, it's just the end. I can handle that. That sucks. That's obviously, like, so sad. Totally want to go on in a good way, but hell, I'm like, wow, if I really burn in hell for eternity, it was like a crazy gamble I made just to be chilling on earth.

[Kayla]

How about come back as a dog?

[George]

Come back as a family dog.

[Sam]

Maybe I don't, like, not into that.

[George]

I'm so sorry.

[Kayla]

To be a dog and be a family dog.

[Sam]

To be like, I have complex ideas

[Kayla]

like dogs can communicate. Wag the tail, woof, woof.

[George]

I don't like. I don't want to be. I do not want to be in someone else's charge. I don't want to be. They decide when I eat, what if I get a bad owner. Not all dogs live charmed lives.

[Kayla]

That's true.

[George]

Some of them are cops, first of all. And some of them work.

[Kayla]

That's true.

[George]

It's scary.

[Kayla]

That's true. I never thought about that.

[George]

Yeah, think about that.

[Sam]

They're going to make you come back as a fish or a bird to

[Kayla]

teach you a lesson to not be so judgmental of fish and birds.

[George]

That'd be kind of beautiful.

[Kayla]

Every time a bird, I feel like a bird is going to fly into my face. Both of these animals are drawn to my face.

[George]

Yeah. So I guess I do have some follow ups. Has a fish or a bird ever approached your face in a really menacing way?

[Kayla]

I do think the pigeons get closer to me than other people. I must be honest. And the fish, there's. They just move unpredictably and so do I. It's not their fault. I do think it'll be an accident with the fish in particular, but it's going to happen.

[Sam]

But with the birds it'll be intense over attacking.

[George]

Is there any part of you that feels like when the fish gets into your mouth that rather than choking on it and dying you might spit it out? Is there a part of you that entertains that ever?

[Kayla]

I just think once they get that far, they're going to want to keep going forward because fish only go forward.

[George]

That is true. But they're not in water so they're not able to swim as well. Don't you feel you could just go and like kind of push it back? I'm just, I'm trying to help you because you seem very obviously like distraught about this and I want to help.

[Kayla]

I hope that I have the wherewithal to get it out.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

But I don't know if I do.

[George]

Well, you're in big trouble. If it's a small, here's what I'll say. If it's a tiny fish, you're fine.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

If it's a huge fish, you're fine.

[Sam]

Right.

[George]

If you get a medium sized fish, that's the day.

[Sam]

No, that's clogging.

[Kayla]

I'm dead. Yeah, it's over.

[George]

I have a friend with a bird phobia and going out with her is so annoying. It's like I can't keep hearing about it.

[Kayla]

Oh, for real.

[George]

I love her to death. Maddie, I'm so sorry. I love you, girl. But, like, truly, the. Like, we're sitting and like a bird even comes close. I'm like, stop with this. Like you need to get therapy or like something needs to give. I can't do it. People with rats, too. When. When the rat comes a little closer, it's like you can jump, but you can't scream and breathe heavy for three blocks.

[Kayla]

Yeah, no, that's okay.

[Dr. Joy]

This is Dr. Joy from therapy for black Girls. If you could enjoy a spotless space without so much scrubbing, wouldn't you? Of course you would. Well, I've got you. Dawn Power Wash Dish Spray cuts through the mess and gets everything clean in half the time. We're talking about both the toughest messes and everyday dishes. Plus, its work goes beyond the sink. Like to clean counters, stoves, grills, and to remove stains on laundry. And it's really good at getting those hard to clean dishes. So basically, Dawn Power Wash cleans everything from dishes to grills, removing all the grease and grime and does it twice as fast. Not bad. You can find Dawn Power Wash dish spray at your favorite retailer. Dawn is a proud sponsor of the Elton John Impact Awards, honoring those who have helped shape a more inclusive and compassionate world with their artistry, advocacy, and unwavering commitment to equality. And we like to take this opportunity to congratulate all of this year's deserving honorees. You won't want to miss the Elton John Impact Awards podcast, available on June 1st on the iHeartRadio app. And everywhere podcasts are heard.

[Mistr Ad Voice]

Did you know you can get your prep for free? Prep is a once daily pill that's up to 99% effective at preventing the transmission of HIV. Mr. Makes it easy and free to get started all online, no doctor's office and no paperwork. They also provide free doxy pep, a simple antibiotic you take after sex to help prevent certain STIs. Kind of like morning after pill for STIs. Whether you have insurance or not, Mistr's got you covered in three easy steps. One, sign [e-mail], two, consult with a licensed doctor online and three, complete your at home testing kit. Then your medication is delivered discreetly right to your door. It's safe, easy and completely judgment free. Protect yourself and protect each other. Sign [e-mail] today.

[Lambda Legal Ad Voice]

Dozens of executive orders, thousands of anti LGBTQ bills. All designed to harm people. We know people. We love the people we are every day. Lambda Legal is in court fighting back. And when we take a stand, we're standing as the last line of defense between real human beings and harm. But we don't do it alone. With every act of support, you stand with us, and together we'll hold the line. Fund the [e-mail] Donate

[Ad Read Announcer]

support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public, you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index, and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks Generated Assets assets are like ETFs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors, llc. SEC Registered Advisor. Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com disclosures.

[Sam]

Caleb, what is your straight topic and

[George]

what's straight about it? Okay, okay, okay, okay. What was I thinking of? I had a couple. Oh, okay. This is what I was gonna say. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I don't know if this is happening to everybody, but the gay people in my life are on thin fucking ice because they are not doing this. Straight people have separate hobbies that their partner are not invited to. Yeah, I really, really like this. And I want gay people to get involved. The number of gay people I invite one gay person, be they lesbian, be they gay man. Be they some different pronoun mixture but queer. I will invite them to. It's not funny. In some people's situation, I will invite them to something. One of them, one partner.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

And then they'll say, we'll be there.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Who's we? Right. I don't like that.

[Sam]

Yeah, let's talk about that pronoun.

[George]

They weren't invited. We.

[Sam]

We.

[George]

When couples become we without my consent, your partner, you have to ask me, would you mind if. If Jared came? Jared's not always necessarily invited.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Unless. By the way, there are some couples in my life that know they are exempt from this because I knew each of them. Either I met them at the same time in the context of a couple, or I knew each of them separately before they came became a couple. There are rules to this shit. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Kayla]

100%. I, I it's a big pet peeve when people don't ask because, you know, we're in relationships. I'm always like, is it okay if blank if we bring blank?

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And it's like you gotta ask. You gotta ask.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And I feel sometimes there's a looming threat of not asking where it's like you don't know who you're gonna get. And it makes the vibe so completely different. Where I think they're not asking knowingly because they don't want you to panic, of course.

[George]

And they don't want you to be able to say no. And also, God forbid, they're going through something and it's kind of coming through in the vibe and they don't know it. Now the couple's there and they're going through something and they're kind of being like, so how are you?

[Sam]

Right.

[George]

Fuck.

[Sam]

But this is the difference between that and then the straight impulse to basically be like, it's boys night, it's girls night. Now, of course I like it too, and I think it's healthy. But of course, often the implication is it's boys night because I hate my wife. It's girls night because my husband is a criminal that should be in prison.

[George]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Sam]

Finally I am away from him because every day is a nightmare and I cry myself to sleep.

[George]

One of my options for this was going to be straight people's I hate my partner merch. The novelty shirts. If found, don't return to my bitch wife. Return to the boys like that. I think that's kind of combative and fun. I don't want it with my partner, but I think it's really beautiful and it's one of the last things that straight people have, like a true corner on.

[Sam]

It is a kind of roast hum roast based humor that is refreshing when you're used to everything being kumbaya and we're all making like a collective stew because it's co op night.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

I mean, gender breakdown of a relationship, sometimes it is a helpful barrier. Yeah. Because you can't find a reason to not bring your same sex partner.

[Sam]

Gender can be helpful.

[Kayla]

Gender can be helpful.

[George]

The Binary has helped in situations before.

[Kayla]

It has helped. And I'm like, trying to think because this is. I don't know if this will lead to anything fruitful, but I'm gonna say it anyway. So, currently, I feel like I'm very new to la. Husband is with me. I'm saying you should go out and make your own friends. You need to go out and make friends that aren't people, you know, through me. And then he'll, like, hang out with someone and he'll be like, well, they're kind of weirded out that you're not coming to hang out with them. And I'm like, well, I don't want to be their friend. I want you to have your own friends.

[George]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kayla]

But it's weird to explain to them why I'm not coming.

[Sam]

Yeah. Because it'd be so much easier if you were like, I'm a girl.

[Kayla]

I'm a girl. You guys are doing boys night. I'm girl.

[George]

Hello. You guys are going to play poker and smoke cigars or whatever.

[Sam]

Yeah. I can't understand those rules. I'm woman's brain, but instead I'm also boy.

[Kayla]

And so they're like, okay, boy hates us. And I'm like, no, it's really malevolent

[George]

when you have two boys and two girls. Things can get very malevolent very fast. Yeah. Because if you're a boy, why are you not a boys night?

[Kayla]

It's crazy.

[George]

In every relationship I've ever been in, I have had multiple times in the relationship, many times where I've said, you can't come tonight. And the reason is that I don't want to see you, I want to see my friends.

[Kayla]

Yeah, that's beautiful.

[George]

I think that's something that straight people are doing more than us, and we have got to get involved in that. I think it's so special. Even when it's toxic, even when it's like the boys are being toxic and gross. I kind of like it. And I like that I get invited to both. I have that privilege.

[Kayla]

I know. That is nice.

[George]

The particular type of gay man that I am, I get invited to girls night and boys night, and I love them equally. And I'm taking sides and I'm trading on people. Yeah. I'm doing tradership.

[Kayla]

What's your relationship with it?

[Sam]

Well, I will say Matthew, you know, took a very intensive wine class and he has his wine friends and they get together and they each bring a bottle of wine and they do a tasting.

[George]

Beautiful.

[Sam]

I am not involved in that.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

And it's amazing.

[George]

It doesn't hurt you?

[Sam]

No, not at all.

[Kayla]

But you also love wine.

[Sam]

Yeah, but.

[George]

And you're a boy. Yeah, Right.

[Kayla]

Does that make it confusing?

[Sam]

And then I guess my version of that, of course, is going to Union Hall.

[Kayla]

Yeah, no, definitely my version of that is going to a comedy show.

[George]

Hanging out in the green room of the bell house of a show you're not even on.

[Sam]

No. Completely complicated.

[Kayla]

Hated about that is. I also don't want to be there.

[George]

I don't want you to have to come because I don't want to go.

[Mistr Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

So that's where it gets confusing.

[George]

Union hall is one of the most insidious hangs in comedy because that green room is absolutely unacceptable. Put up a wall. Do something. I can't keep having the curtain open. I can't keep having one bench everyone's supposed to sit on. Why are there 10 comics back here? Yeah, it's not working.

[Kayla]

I do think it's funny when there's a photographer back there because it's like pictures are just the most insane cluster of people in the smallest space possible. Yeah.

[Sam]

Union hall, of course. Top floor, straight bocce bar. Yeah, fully. It is. It is. After work, drinks, first dates and neighborhood hang for people who live in Park Slope.

[Kayla]

Yes.

[Sam]

And people making out in the broad daylight. People are making out in the broad daylight? Yeah. Oh, my God. I have been at Union hall at

[Dr. Joy]

like, 11pm midnight after a show, and there's somebody straddling somebody on a couch.

[George]

Oh, my God, I've done it.

[Kayla]

Onion Hall.

[George]

Oh, yeah. I'll do it again.

[Sam]

Whoa. You were queering the space.

[George]

I was queering the space. It was different when I was.

[Kayla]

I mean, that's activism.

[George]

I love making out. I'll make out. Union hall. I make out anyway.

[Sam]

Making out publicly is one of those things that truly, when other people do it, I'm like, you are disgusting. And when I do it, I'm like, I'm Carrie Bradshaw.

[George]

That's how I feel. Like I'm in a movie. Welcome to the scene.

[Sam]

No, completely.

[George]

I love making out. I'm not. Not thinking. I love making out. Anywhere is so special and beautiful to me. If I need to make out, I need to make out.

[Kayla]

No, that's true.

[George]

It has to be upstairs at union hall. Then so be it. The chicken wings at Union hall, by the way, not to make it a union hall episode. Those chicken wings are banging. I took a hit of a girl's vape from the audience of a union hall show recently. It was way stronger than I expected. And I said on the stage, someone from the staff has to bring chicken wings to me immediately. I love you guys, please. And they did. And I don't think I've been that happy in a long time.

[Sam]

Yeah, this is actually a really hot

[Kayla]

tip because I always get the burger and I'm not happy with it, but I get it every single time.

[George]

It's time to move on.

[Kayla]

Thank you.

[George]

It's time to move on to the chicken wings also. I'm just going to be transparent with you guys. I have been developing an itwitch and it's flaring up right now.

[Sam]

You posted about this.

[George]

I'm really scared.

[Sam]

I also had one and actually went away without me doing anything.

[George]

Okay. How long did you have it?

[Sam]

Like a few months. Like maybe two months.

[George]

Oh my God, that is so long.

[Sam]

Like maybe two months.

[George]

I'm being such a baby. I've had it for like five days and I'm like. So there's this life altering thing that

[Kayla]

has happened to me.

[Sam]

What I've realized is that you literally can't control your health. You know, I have this thing where I get sick very often and I also used to be a smoker. I quit smoking. Since quitting smoking, I've gotten sick more.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Hello. Hello. I thought that was bad for my health. Excuse me, do I need to start smoking again?

[George]

You didn't do anything about. You didn't get a new prescription? You didn't start drinking more water, less caffeine, potassium, sleep, anything.

[Sam]

I'm good at water and sleep.

[George]

Me too.

[Sam]

Because people, you know, one of my biggest pet peeves, asking someone, what are your immunity tips? They go drink a lot of water and get a lot of sleep and eat a lot of vegetables. Like, I'm sorry, do you think I'm. Let's Get It Started by the Black Eyed Peas?

[George]

Yeah. Do you think I'm just, what? I'm just railing fried foods and soda and no sleep every night until 4 in the morning? No. I'm in bed drinking water. What about you, Itwitch? You ever had one?

[Kayla]

I was just getting one in the park.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Yeah. And I was like, I don't know why I have an itwitch right now. I'm actually pretty relaxed. I thought I was.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

But when I do have them, they last a long time.

[Sam]

Although, you know, the other thing with like months, the other thing with water sleep, it's like water sleep and of course screen time. And I'm like, doesn't count.

[George]

That's not Real. I'm different.

[Sam]

I can handle it.

[George]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're weak.

[Sam]

Do your week. Screen time is the one French lady who's 105 years old and she smoked a pack a day. That's me with screen time. I can be on my phone. It doesn't affect me.

[George]

Over the next. I will say I've been talking about this. I'm banking episodes of my podcast right now. And now I've brought up the itwitch on your show. So over the next one to three months.

[Sam]

Yeah, it's gonna be a huge.

[George]

People are just going to hear me talk about this Itwitch a lot, and they're just gonna have to get okay with it, because when something's happening to me, it's happening to everybody.

[Kayla]

Of course.

[George]

It's everyone's problem.

[Sam]

Oh, my God. When I was on Accutane last summer, it would. I would call the New York Times every day and say, why isn't this in the Arts and Leisure section? I'm still on Accutane.

[Kayla]

I had about two years of health issues that this podcast heard way too much about. We got a comment that was like, there's the. The one who's in always in the hospital is annoying.

[George]

One. Please shut up. We'll talk about it less. Do something. Thank you.

[Sam]

I mean, it was all worth it because of the fact that you had a catheter in while we interviewed Kathy Griffin.

[Kayla]

Of course it was worth it for that.

[George]

You had a catheter.

[Sam]

Oh, while we had Kathy Griffin on. And then she said, you know, my fans are called catheters.

[George]

Okay. Shout out.

[Kayla]

I had a kidney problem. It's fixed now. I think it's all good. Yeah, it's all good. Yeah.

[George]

Oh. What was the kidney problem? Do you want to talk about it or not really.

[Kayla]

We don't need to talk about it.

[Sam]

It's kind of gross. Have you ever considered donating? No.

[George]

That's not the kind of stuff I'm getting involved in. I don't feel that I. I'm healthy. I have no health issues, but I feel that there will come a day when I need all my stuff.

[Sam]

Yeah. Because I feel a lot of guilt about. I used to be much more. I guess charitable would be the word. And I feel like I don't do enough to help out. And I had the thought the other day, what would sort of be a great way to like, make up for the last two years? Just donate a kidney. That's, like, such a big act that it's as though I've Been volunteering for two years.

[George]

I'm not giving up my body. I'm not giving up my body. I'm not g giving blood. I'm not giving organs. It's. It's not. I'm. I'll give of my money in time and my thoughts. Sure, yeah. Prayers even. I'm not giving of my body.

[Sam]

One of my favorite archetypes, gay guys who are so pissed they can't give blood.

[Kayla]

Yeah. Oh, my God, it's so fake. It's like, so fake.

[George]

Yeah, well, and it's also like, guys, we are literally like, in an act

[Sam]

up in an Act Up T shirt, rioting. I'm like, it's fine.

[Kayla]

Well, it's like the gay guys in this day and age are, like, desperate to, like, find where they're discriminated against. It's like, you can find it, sure, but you're digging a little deep.

[George]

It's to me, honestly. And this might be controversial and we can keep it in. It's the same thing with the wedding cakes. I don't care.

[Sam]

Oh, my God.

[George]

Wedding cake. Fuck you. I'll take my business somewhere else. What is this? Like, we're going to the Supreme Court about it. Fuck that bigot and their cake. Go to a gay cake shop.

[Sam]

The idea that you convince the bigot to make you a cake and then you're like, thank you.

[George]

It's like, fuck that cake.

[Sam]

Why would you want that cake? That is such bad juicy. You're starting your life together, together eating the bigoted cake.

[George]

It doesn't make any sense.

[Kayla]

Oh, and they're putting weird stuff in there.

[George]

Oh, they're putting stuff in there.

[Kayla]

Yeah. Not good.

[George]

Who knows what's going in there.

[Sam]

Also, a cake for gay wedding. You're going to need that to be gluten free, sugar free. You're going to need to have no artificial food coloring. That is not going to happen at the homophobic bakery, by the way.

[George]

I'm not vegan or gluten free and my birthday cake was vegan and gluten free. And I got zero applause. Not a thank you text. The number of vegans who benefited from my conscientiousness at my own birthday party. Nary a thank you.

[Kayla]

These people are full.

[Sam]

This is a constant battle I deal with, with where I will deal with. I'm very inclusive of food allergies. But I need you to then be on your knees thanking me.

[George]

Yeah, well, worship me.

[Sam]

Like I need credit. I need you next time we see each other, to bring up, by the way, thank you two years ago when you got that gluten free carrot cake.

[George]

Wasn't that nice?

[Kayla]

One time, Misha. Homemade falafel, pita hummus, the whole thing. Because we were having vegans over for dinner.

[Sam]

I sweared again.

[Kayla]

And you better believe they took one bite and they're like full. And it was like, so are we supposed to eat all this by ourselves? Yeah. This is completely insane, by the way.

[George]

If we were having it, it would taste way better because we'd do it normal style.

[Kayla]

Of course.

[George]

I'm sorry, I can't. If you're gonna be vegan or otherwise, you need to be showing a lot of appreciation for your friends who are normal that are making concessions. My birthday cake was vegan.

[Sam]

That's crazy.

[George]

That's how embarrassing that is to me.

[Kayla]

That must have been weird.

[George]

Do you know how fucking embarrassing that is? There could have been real butter in there, but there wasn't because of you. And they're. They're eating it. They're saying nothing. On top of that, they're non binary.

[Kayla]

Not that it matters, but it's just like.

[George]

Once again, I've gone out of my way for your thing.

[Kayla]

Of course, of course.

[George]

Kidding. Love you guys.

[Kayla]

So when you're sort of dealing with a person in a relationship who's bringing their partner all the time, are you ever sort of just like, hey, could it just be us?

[George]

Oh, absolutely. And it's not a could. I'm.

[Sam]

I'm very, very much saying, you're blocking the partner.

[George]

Oh, I'm texting all the time. Texting and saying, hey, I would like to invite you guys over for dinner tonight. It's a girls night. Nobody's partners are invited. Thank you. I'm telling you up front, there's no plus ones. There's no. This is the hang I'd like to have tonight.

[Kayla]

That is. The solution is just calling it girls night. Gender neutral, where it's like just not partners. Yeah, that's actually something that could be good.

[Sam]

Yeah. Girls night means no partners. It doesn't mean girls.

[George]

Right? Yeah, I'm not doing it every time. I'm happy to hang out with your partner every once in a while. There's some. And by the way, you know what really sucks is of the people I'm doing that to, maybe 40 to 60% of them I would like for their partner to come, but I know that's annoying.

[Sam]

Yes.

[George]

Because the other people don't know and they'll bring their annoying partner that they know we don't like because they're trying to, like, force feed us them.

[Kayla]

That is so tough.

[George]

There's nothing worse than when your friend or loved one has a partner that they're trying to like. Like, make the group love. They're trying to, like, get the group to fall in love with this person. It's like, baby, it's been six years. We don't like him.

[Sam]

No, totally.

[George]

Stop bringing him to everything. It's not. We're not going to change our minds. What we can do now is ride it out. And there's.

[Sam]

And of course, don't even get me on people who love to shit talk their partners. You're walking them through. You're basically convincing them almost to break up with them every single time a conversation happens for six years. And then they're like, richard's coming.

[George]

Can you guys be nicer to Richard? I just feel like you guys are kind of mean to Richard. Why doesn't he get the treatment other partners get?

[Kayla]

And it's like, because you told me every day for the last six years to hate him. Yeah.

[George]

He's a disgusting cretin.

[Sam]

You told me he cheated on you.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

You told me you would never forgive him.

[George]

I don't like him and now I forgive him. He's doing something for you that I don't understand. That's fine. But no, I don't want to go to dinner with him. He bores the fuck out of me. I don't like him. I'm so sorry. But yeah, I'm definitely being. I'm definitely putting down. I'm saying, hey, I can't do it.

[Kayla]

Yeah, no, that's good. That's really good. I'm not doing that.

[George]

Or if I've agreed to a plan and they say, oh, also insert partner you don't like is gonna come. I'll go, oh, sorry, that changes the context for me. I don't. I want to do it. I'm not having a night I don't want to. I'm not having a night I don't want to have.

[Kayla]

That is so wild.

[George]

Three nights are too precious. I'm not having a night I don't want to. No.

[Kayla]

And I respect it.

[Sam]

I am increasingly feeling that way.

[Kayla]

I feel it. It's just so hard.

[Sam]

Hard.

[George]

It's hard.

[Kayla]

Yeah.

[George]

But, God, I'm doing it.

[Sam]

But you've maintained your joie de vivre when it comes to going out. I think you like the concept of going out more than any individual person.

[George]

That's beautiful. Did that feel beautiful? To receive.

[Kayla]

That felt amazing.

[George]

To receive that had to feel like a big hug.

[Kayla]

Yeah, that was great.

[George]

I needed that opposite of the shirt comment at clubcoming. Yeah.

[Kayla]

Finally I can forgive you for the shirt thing.

[Sam]

I want to keep talking for a

[Kayla]

full hour and a half.

[Sam]

Have.

[Kayla]

What's our time?

[George]

Oh, sorry. Are we over? I don't know what we've done.

[Kayla]

Oh, when did we start?

[George]

We're not.

[Sam]

It's actually not that bad. No, never mind. I was miscalculating.

[George]

So what you just revealed to me. Hour and eight minutes in, and you just revealed that talking to me feels laborious?

[Sam]

Literally, not at all. And I actually have a rebuttal.

[George]

Tell me.

[Sam]

And you're going to regret saying that.

[George]

Just keep in mind you're young as one with an eye twitch. Keep going.

[Sam]

No. We've had recordings at the same time every day this week except today. So I was. I was looking at the time, thinking we had a different start time. That's why I was.

[Kayla]

Which is why I was 45 minutes early.

[George]

You were 45 minutes early because you.

[Sam]

So that's sort of where it all comes from. So your eyes currently twitching.

[Dr. Joy]

Recording later, it was also pushed back another 15 minutes. That was on me for not clear.

[Sam]

No, no, no, no.

[George]

Whoa, whoa.

[Sam]

Becca.

[Kayla]

But it's okay. All week, I had been wanting to sit in the park and read Famesick by Lena Dunham, but always I was like, well, I don't have time. I don't have time. And then today, 45 minutes early, I got some time. That's beautiful. I'm going to the park and I'm reading Famous Dick by Luna o'.

[George]

Donnell.

[Sam]

That's really. What are you reading?

[George]

What am I reading right now? The Unbearable Lightness of Being.

[Sam]

Oh, fun.

[George]

Yeah. I've never read it. My friend gave it to me and she said, you should read this. I said, okay, so I'm reading it. I just read the Will to Change by bell hooks.

[Sam]

Oh, my God, George, you can't just

[Kayla]

ask people what they're reading.

[Sam]

Clearly, I can. He's been waiting for the question the whole time. Like, finally I can bring up stupid

[George]

you guys were talking about. I'm like, let's talk about bell hooks.

[Sam]

Let's literally talk about bell hooks.

[George]

Have y' all read that book?

[Kayla]

No.

[Sam]

No, I've read All About Love. Is that the one that everyone reads All About?

[George]

Love is great. Will to Change. I recommend it to. I'm now saying every man should read this book.

[Sam]

Do you know what's tough about bell hooks or any of this? Tell me about yeah, obviously, bell hooks.

[George]

The lowercase.

[Sam]

No, no, no.

[Kayla]

That's tough, too.

[Sam]

Nothing wrong she did is bad.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

What's bad about bell hooks? What's bad about bell hooks is she empowered multiple generations of people to speak like her but don't actually have substantial things to say. Do you know what I mean? And it's difficult to grapple with that as her legacy. To be like, I love your work and it's so necessary. And it was such a necessary intervention. But now people are on Tumblr and they are speaking like that.

[George]

It really is tough. Well, now it's migrated to substack. Substack is a very nefarious space, unfortunately. I love. And when I say that I love substack, I actually think it's so interesting. Every seventh post is from someone who thinks they're bell hooks, and they are. They're universes away from being bell hooks.

[Sam]

I struggle, of course. I'm stub. I'm substack presenting.

[George]

You have a very substack surface vibe.

[Sam]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kayla]

Do you ever think about just leaning into that and just having one, in fact?

[Sam]

Yeah, I do. But I'm also like, if everyone already thinks they have one, it would be so much extra work to actually do it. Let them think that.

[Kayla]

Oh, no, that's true.

[George]

The fact that you don't have a book of essays, it's weird right now is bizarre.

[Kayla]

It's scary.

[George]

Completely strange. Yeah, Completely strange. I did want to tell you, though, I'm loving the hair.

[Sam]

Thank you.

[George]

Kayla, your hair's looking great. And you got a haircut before coming here. You bought. Your hair's both looking very good right now.

[Sam]

Thank you. I really appreciate. I actually, it was so long, like, literally earlier this week, and then I got a huge haircut, so we both

[Kayla]

got haircuts this week.

[George]

That's.

[Kayla]

You can believe that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[George]

Not because I was coming, but it coincided sort of.

[Sam]

Of.

[Kayla]

What's.

[Sam]

What does your hair currently look like?

[George]

Not good. If I take this hat off, but it's kind of short. I. I got it cut recently for, like, work stuff, so it was like. It's, like, in decent shape, but I also was growing my facial hair out. Oh, my God. Do you guys want to see a picture of me with a goatee?

[Sam]

Yes.

[George]

Okay, hold on, I'll show it to you. Oh, I don't have my phone.

[Sam]

Have you ever had a full beard?

[George]

Show it to you later. My official hair.

[Sam]

And have you ever had a mustache? Follow up question.

[George]

My facial hair? No, my facial hair doesn't grow fast enough or well enough. My facial hair grows like I just had it pretty long after.

[Sam]

After.

[George]

It's always my rebellion after. I have to shave a bunch. I had to shave a bunch for Devil Wears Prada stuff. And I was like, I hate fucking doing it. And so then I was in Portugal with my little facial hair and then I got back and kept letting it grow and I shaved it into a goatee for one hour. Of course, as we do, I do want to show you guys a photo. It was really, really disturbing. I look extremely Republican. It's very scary.

[Sam]

This is a thing because I, of course, every time I've shaved off my beard, I first do a goatee as a joke and take a photo, of course. But it's not even funny. It looks so bad. Like you think it's like lol.

[George]

It's very scary.

[Sam]

It's like having a. I actually think having a mohawk can be funny. You're like, oh my God, look at me, I have a mohawk. But a goatee is not. It can't be funny.

[George]

No.

[Sam]

You just look.

[George]

It gets scary.

[Sam]

It's bad.

[Kayla]

But it's that thing where if you can pull it off, you're like, name

[Sam]

one person who can pull it off. Oh, Carlos Solis and Desperate Housewives.

[Kayla]

See, there's one, there's one. There's one. Gig I know has one and it looks amazing.

[George]

Stone cold Steve Austin, I think had one.

[Kayla]

Yes, he look good.

[George]

And a lot of guys in Brooklyn is, whether they know it or not.

[Kayla]

That's true.

[George]

Tiger King. Thank you. You guys both have very good facial hair.

[Sam]

Thank you.

[George]

It's really working. Mustache, great. Whole beard situation, great. It's really working for both of you. I unfortunately do not look right when I have facial hair.

[Sam]

Not even a mustache. Cuz I can see you actually.

[Kayla]

Mustache click.

[George]

Mustache doesn't work for me. I don't know. There's just something about this face that's meant to be clean shaven.

[Kayla]

No, sure. That makes sense.

[George]

I hate it. I wish I was. I want to. I would love to have a beard. I think it would do. I would. I. I get excited thinking about who I might be, but I'm not.

[Sam]

What's your type?

[George]

My type in men? Yeah. Truly, Literally don't have one.

[Kayla]

Okay.

[George]

I have run the gamut. I. It's such a vibes based assessment for me. But yeah, I'm into all kinds of things. I don't like. Maybe there's maybe like, what do I not like? I'm not into like way Way older. I'm not into way, way younger. But that goes without saying thing. I'm strict. Tops annoy me. What do you mean you're a strict top? Yeah.

[Kayla]

No, that's weird. It's very invulnerable.

[George]

First of all, I'm not bottoming for you. You're strict top and you want me to bottom for you. What am I, the help? Get out of here. I don't like that.

[Sam]

Well, it's also like when someone is strict to anything, it's like you're saying that as though it's a medical condition that I have to accommodate.

[George]

Right, right.

[Sam]

I also have preferences.

[George]

Right.

[Sam]

Depending on the day.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Why are we. Why is the conversation ending with you?

[George]

Yeah. It doesn't make any sense for me.

[Kayla]

I almost think it's like, that's like Sniffy's culture almost to be like, strict top. It's more like billboard branding to be like, hit me up for this.

[George]

Yeah. That being said, I do have only top on my Grinder profile, so I am doing that. But it's not true. You know what I mean? I will do other stuff, but it is the branding of it all where it's like, I don't want a million tops hitting me up and this filters them out.

[Sam]

Well, it's important to have flexibility. I mean, I am. I identify as a man, but that doesn't mean I'm a football player.

[George]

You know what I mean? Although there is diversity, I would love to see it.

[Kayla]

No trust.

[Sam]

I would absolutely kill the Super Bowl.

[George]

I would love to see you in the Super Bowl.

[Sam]

Well, you know, one of my biggest fears, I said this the other day. Do you remember the Disney Channel show, the jersey?

[Kayla]

No.

[Sam]

They put on a jersey, they become a professional athlete. It's a magical jersey that rocks. One of my biggest fears, I would put on the jersey. Suddenly I have to hit a touchdown down. I barely know the rules.

[George]

Hit a touchdown.

[Sam]

What is it? Throw a touchdown.

[George]

So funny. Just score a touchdown. Yeah. Hit a touchdown is iconic, though. I'm really loving that.

[Sam]

Yeah, See, I don't. I've never learned the rules of football.

[George]

You should watch football with me this season.

[Sam]

I.

[Kayla]

You actually watch it. That is so interesting.

[George]

You do want to do that with me. It's a special, important thing to me.

[Sam]

I understand that. It's authentic to you.

[George]

If we're going to go deeper, you're going to have to watch at least one game.

[Kayla]

I like, wish I'll go as far as basketball.

[Sam]

Do you watch basketball?

[Kayla]

Do you watch soccer?

[George]

No. I don't care about either of those.

[Sam]

You only watch football.

[George]

It's football for me. Can I tell you something? This might sweeten the pot a little bit. I want both of you to watch a football game with me, okay? You're going to have to cheer for the Kansas City Chiefs. It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world if you thought.

[Sam]

Is that Taylor Swift?

[George]

Her boyfriend is on the team. Her fiance is on the team. I make good food for it.

[Sam]

Oh, my God. I would love to come to a party.

[Kayla]

There's nothing I love more than the Super Bowl. Put the thing on mute.

[George]

Eat the food. No, we're listening to the game. It's not the Super Bowl. It's like, week two of the regular season.

[Kayla]

The noise gives me a headache.

[George]

No, no, we're watching the game. It's not going to be so loud. We'll talk about it.

[Kayla]

Oh, my God. Can we put on some music and mute this damn thing?

[Sam]

So are you sort of.

[George]

Do you.

[Sam]

Are you viewing it through a queer lens, or are you just, like, going boy mode? No, you're just enjoying football.

[George]

I'm definitely, I will say, because, like, I.

[Sam]

When I watch the Olympics, it's basically like I'm watching a Lady Gaga concert. The way I'm processing it is not how other people are processing it.

[George]

I will say I have brought so many girls and gays into football that I know how to put on the show. I know what needs to be done. I know how to talk about the drama. I know how to talk about the wives. I know how to bring in the intrigue. I am talking about how hot the players are. Of course.

[Kayla]

Sure. You're humans.

[Sam]

Like, I'm not attracted to football players. That's so not. Are you.

[Kayla]

There are absolutely.

[George]

That is crazy to say. There are football players you would be attracted to. There are pretty ones. There are ugly ones. There are mask ones. There are fem ones.

[Sam]

Are there fem ones, Kayla?

[George]

Yes, they are. And they're cornerbacks. They're cornerbacks and wide receivers.

[Sam]

The idea of being like, as a femme identifying football player, it's been hard for me.

[George]

They're not identifying. I'm identifying them. I'm telling you. Some of them, you watch their little interviews, and you're like, that is a gay man. Yeah. And some of them probably are.

[Kayla]

Sure, sure, sure, sure, sure.

[George]

I will get you into this.

[Sam]

Okay.

[Kayla]

I mean, I've always. It's always been an amazing dream in fantasy that every Sunday I'm like, can't. Gotta watch the big Game, of course. That would be so fun. But it's fantasy for me. It's as fantastical as maybe waking up early and going to church.

[George]

It's actually quite annoying to have that in your life.

[Dr. Joy]

Life.

[George]

It ruins my life quite often.

[Kayla]

No, it's like Drag Race is already too much.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Every week I have to watch this thing.

[Sam]

By the way, Drag Race coming back tomorrow.

[Kayla]

Oh, God, is it. Which I celebrate.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Which I celebrate an obligation.

[Sam]

Did you watch Drag Race?

[George]

I have never seen an episode.

[Sam]

Wow.

[George]

I've never seen it.

[Sam]

And yet you love the Chiefs.

[George]

I love the Chiefs. It's far more compelling. I've seen gay guys dress up and be mean. What I haven't seen is the Kansas City Chiefs beat the Broncos Right. Next season, and that's what I'll need to be seeing. I. Look, Drag Race. I'm sure it's great. I think maybe at some point I would be convinced to watch some of it, but I. No one's made a compelling pitch to me yet.

[Sam]

Are you a reality show person? Because we're the only gay guys who don't watch reality television.

[George]

I don't watch any reality tv.

[Sam]

Thank you, and welcome to this space.

[George]

I got briefly into selling Sunset, mostly because of Chrishell. I do love that girl. Yeah.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

That was a Covid thing that has kind of carried.

[Sam]

I also have. My covet thing was Vanderpump and Roni, and I. I, like, sort of waterboarded myself with it for, like, two months, and then I was like, I can never do this again.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Are they not, like, hitting you up to be a judge on Drag Race, though?

[George]

They have not. They have not hit me up to be a judge on Drag Race. Many of the gay things you would think I would hear from are really not coming into my inbox.

[Kayla]

Really?

[George]

Many of the gay things are not calling my number.

[Kayla]

That is interesting.

[George]

I have pretty much zero feelings about it. I wouldn't say yes to begin with,

[Kayla]

of course, but I. I would love if you said yes and didn't know anything about it.

[George]

I think that'd be fun.

[Kayla]

I think that'd be really funny.

[George]

I find it anthropolog fascinating, but it does not hurt my feelings. I'm just like, oh, that's interesting. Yeah, I would think. But, no, never been hit up. I'm friends with a lot of the queens. I. And they seem like they've had fun on there, some of them.

[Sam]

And many of them ruined their lives.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

Many of them have been traumatized.

[George]

Yeah.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

But I send them all love. It seems like a fascinating thing. Yeah. I know that RuPaul has her own camera that smooths her in a different way than everyone else. And she can't be filmed on the regular cameras. That's the coolest thing I've ever heard about.

[Kayla]

That's amazing.

[Sam]

We have that too. Or I. I do.

[George]

Yeah. Your warriors didn't get to work that way.

[Kayla]

Oh, I'm not looking good on these cameras.

[Dr. Joy]

This is Dr. Joy from therapy for Black Girls. If you could enjoy a spotless space without so much scrubbing, wouldn't you? Of course you would. Well, I've got you. Dawn Power Wash Dish Spray cuts through the mess and gets everything clean in half the time. We're talking about both the toughest messes in everyday dishes. Dishes. Plus its work goes beyond the sink, like to clean counters, stoves, grills, and to remove stains on laundry. And it's really good at getting those hard to clean dishes. So basically, Dawn Power Wash cleans everything from dishes to grills, removing all the grease and grime and does it twice as fast. Not bad. You can find Dawn Power Wash Dish spray at your favorite retailer. Dawn is a proud sponsor of the Elton John Impact Awards, honoring those who have helped shape a more inclusive and compassionate world with their artistry, advocacy and unwavering commitment to equality. And we'd like to take this opportunity to congratulate all of this year's deserving honorees. You won't want to miss the Elton John Impact Awards podcast, available on June 1st on the iHeartRadio app. And everywhere podcasts are heard.

[Mistr Ad Voice]

Did you know you can get your prep for free? Prep is a once daily pill that's up to 99% effective at preventing the transmission of HIV. HIV Mr. Makes it easy and free to get started. All online, no doctor's office and no paperwork. They also provide free Doxy Pep, a simple antibiotic you take after sex to help prevent certain STIs. Kind of like morning after pill for STIs. Whether you have insurance or not, Mister's got you covered in three easy steps. One. One, sign [e-mail] two. Consult with a licensed doctor online. And three, complete your at home testing kit. Then your medication is delivered discreetly right to your door. It's safe, easy and completely judgment free. Protect yourself and protect each other. Sign [e-mail] today, dozens of executive orders,

[Lambda Legal Ad Voice]

thousands of anti LGBTQ bills. All designed to harm people. Know people. We love the people we are. Every day Lambda Legal is in court fighting back. And when we take a stand. We're standing as the last line of defense between real human beings and harm. But we don't do it alone. With every act of support, you stand with us and together we'll hold the line. Fund the [e-mail] Donate

[Ad Read Announcer]

support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks generate an assets are like ETFs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member FINRA and SIPC Advisory services by Public Advisors, llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not an investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com disclosures.

[Kayla]

I'm feeling as though we should do our final segment.

[George]

Okay, that was hurtful, but let's do it.

[Kayla]

It's just somebody had to be the one to do it. Yeah.

[George]

You know, wasn't going to be me.

[Sam]

Well, do you have any final thoughts on having separate versus common hobbies as a couple?

[George]

No. No.

[Sam]

I really think that was rude.

[George]

I really think we. Yeah.

[Sam]

Yeah.

[George]

Well, now I'm ready to go. I'm being fucking rushed out the door with a broom by Sam. Yeah. No, so I don't have any more thoughts.

[Sam]

What do you have to have after this?

[George]

I'm going to a concert.

[Sam]

What concert?

[George]

I'm going to see Kevin Morby play at Lucinda's.

[Sam]

Who is that?

[George]

Kevin Morby is so great. He's a musician. He's a friend of mine. He is playing. He's about to start a big tour for his new record, but he's doing a small show at Lucinda's.

[Kayla]

Fun.

[George]

So I'm going to go down there and see the show.

[Kayla]

Love that.

[George]

You guys can come if you want. Right?

[Kayla]

Of course.

[George]

Let's just End it.

[Sam]

We'll talk after we do have an answer.

[Kayla]

Yeah. So basically our final segment is called Shout Outs. And in this segment, we pay homage to the grand straight tradition of the radio shout out. Shouting out to anything that we enjoy. People, places, things, ideas. We make them up on the spot and we go first. And George, do you have one?

[Sam]

I do. I've actually recently made a creative decision that I'm now going to be doing shout outs in my normal speaking voice.

[Kayla]

Love that.

[Sam]

Usually, usually we'll do what's Up Freaks and Losers.

[Kayla]

I'll do it. What's up, Freaks, Losers and perverts around the globe. I want to give a huge shout out to Kaleila. I am loving the new music that is coming out. And I was late to the game and on her in the sense that I got into her last album and everyone was already being like, oh, my God, I can't believe she's coming out with another album. And I was like, yeah, totally. I can't believe it's another album. I've listened to her all my life. Then I went back, listened to the rest of it. I said, damn, they were right to have that hype. And now I'm in on it. And the new album is coming out and it's, you know, sort of shoegaze mixed with whatever else. And I say, wow, that is interesting. And I feel that, you know, a lot of people are saying, yeah, I can do rock, too. I can do rock, too. And with Kaleila, I believe it. I think she is studied, a genius, has incredible taste, and I think it's an amazing release for summer. So what is up, Kaleila? I'm so happy. And I did order the album while a little bit drunk after dinner with George the other night. So shout out to you, xoxo, Sam,

[Sam]

I really, it warms my heart that you've become a Kayla Stan, because, you know, I was probably the first gay guy to ever discover her in 2012.

[Kayla]

Yeah, I was not there yet.

[Sam]

I saw her in San Francisco in 2013, I believe.

[Kayla]

Whoa.

[Sam]

My biggest fear, of course, is that we would meet and she wouldn't like me.

[Kayla]

Interpersonally, I doubt she would like you.

[Sam]

Yeah, I don't think we would vibe,

[Kayla]

but I doubt she would like me either. It's just not.

[Sam]

I bet you she would find you more authentic or something and she would

[Kayla]

be like, no, no, no, no.

[Sam]

She would think I was trying too hard.

[Kayla]

Well, let's hope we never meet her.

[Sam]

Yeah, I think it's definitely a never meet Your heroes situation. I was actually recently thinking how PJ Harvey would probably hate me. It's a different story. I want to give a shout out to. Actually, mine's a music one as well, to Yassi Salik and her podcast Bandsplain. Have you ever listened to it? No. I discovered it recently. It's a very popular podcast, but each episode is about a different band. They did an episode specifically on the song Boys on the Radio by Hole, which is my favorite Hole song. And it is like two and a half hours long and I was having the time of my life. Do you want to hear something? I learned what Hollaback Girl is about Courtney Love.

[Kayla]

What?

[Sam]

Isn't that one of the craziest things you've ever heard?

[George]

That is nuts.

[Sam]

One of the many historical tidbits that I learned in this wonderful podcast episode. The guest was Patrick Samberg and I highly recommend it for anyone who loves Hole, who loves Courtney Love, and who loves the album Celebrity Skin. And so that is my earnest shout out for today.

[Kayla]

Well.

[Dr. Joy]

Woo.

[Kayla]

That was amazing.

[Sam]

Thank you.

[George]

That was beautiful. What's up, freaks, losers and perverts around the globe? I want to give a shout out to Myrtle Todd, my restaurant in my neighborhood. I have eaten it four of the last six days and I cannot stop the pork belly. Pan fried noodles are absolutely changing my life. I want to shout out everybody in there, they love me. They know me not by name but by vibe and order. I also want to shout out Dandria from many, many years ago. A singer that I am back on recently. D O N D R I A Please look up her hits. I'm having a fabulous time coming back to them. I also want to shout out Lena Dunham as we get on the Fame Sick. Thank you very much. I want to shout out, Lena, you're an absolute icon. I don't know where we would be culturally without you. I think you've gotten an interesting rap in this world and I love the way you're handling it, girl. You looked great at the Met gala. I can't wait to read your book. I also want to shout out. What else do I want to shout out? I want to shout out the concept of mopeds slash Vespas. I'm considering purchasing one. I love the way I feel on one. I want to shout out whoever thinks thought of that, especially the ones that go a little faster than the other ones. I also want to shout out city bike. You guys are doing something incredible for this city. Yes. A lot of people don't know that if you message or if you send in a request on the app, they will send you a physical key to get city bikes. You don't have to use your phone. You do not have to. I'm loving your reaction. You do not have to have your phone to get a city bike. They will send you a physical fob that you can keep on your keys. You walk up to a bike, push the fob in. It unlocks the bike immediately.

[Kayla]

Oh, my God.

[George]

Citibike. Citi Bike physical fob. If you can hear me, thank you so much for what you're doing for this city. I absolutely love you. Everyone get on. It costs $10. They send it in a couple weeks.

[Kayla]

That's amazing.

[George]

Could be quicker on the sending if I'm 100% honest. Or maybe a physical brick and mortar where we could pick up. But those are my shout outs. Thank you.

[Sam]

Wow. You know, we are so inundated with advertising, yet I don't know about the Citi Bike fob, Right?

[Kayla]

I mean, Citibike is the most incredible way to get around this damn town. I'm in heaven whenever I'm on one. I. The only thing they need to figure out is what to do when it's raining. But other than that, figure out what

[George]

to do when it's raining. And also, oh, maybe figure out like a helmet situation.

[Kayla]

That would be helpful.

[George]

I'm actually with a helmet everywhere, but let's get a helmet situation.

[Kayla]

Oh, and people love to say you're not wearing a helmet. It's like, yeah, I'm not going to bring it. I'm not going to bring a. A lone helmet to the bar.

[George]

I'm caring. I run a helmet all day on the off chance I might grab a city bike. That's something. Have a bin of helmets.

[Sam]

They should make a helmet that's this tiny and then you press a button.

[George]

Helmet that works. That is collapsible.

[Sam]

Yeah, yeah.

[George]

You have to understand why that won't work. Of course, but.

[Sam]

Right, of course.

[George]

You imagine with modern science.

[Sam]

I remember about they should do Miniature Wife, but for a helmet.

[Kayla]

Hello, Hello, Hello. Need I say more? No, I'm not going to say what I was going to say because it's frankly boring.

[George]

Yeah.

[Kayla]

And we don't need to end on that.

[George]

There's no worries.

[Sam]

Do you have anything you want to promote?

[George]

I don't know why that's a laughing matter. You guys. I have a lot going on. Please check it out. You can find me on the Internet. You can follow my Instagram if you want to. I simply am not posting. It's Caleb says things. You can find my TikTok where I am being posted for. People are sometimes liking those clips. Maybe you could be one of them. You can Find me on YouTube. My podcast comes out every Thursday. It's called so True with Caleb Heron. It is barely good, but it is sometimes a lot of fun. And I'm in a couple of movies this year if you want to go watch them. It would mean the world to me. Thank you.

[Sam]

And they are Devil Wears Prada too.

[George]

Correct. And. And I was in a movie called Pizza Movie for Hulu. That's very stupid, but very fun. Fun Nick and Brian.

[Sam]

Shout out.

[George]

Love you guys. I have a movie coming out with John Cena and Eric Andre in June called Little Brother on Netflix. Shout out Matt Spicer. I love you. Thank you for putting me in it. And then my film about my dad that I co wrote with Ruby Castor and co starred in with Zoe Deschanel is coming out sometime. It's in the post process right now.

[Kayla]

Wow.

[George]

So sometime this year? Next.

[Kayla]

Wow. Well, that's huge.

[George]

You guys can support me however you want. There's many ways. Then will me.

[Sam]

None of those films have hunting so. Donate, donate, donate. These are just scripts.

[Kayla]

Well, thanks for doing the pod. What a treat.

[George]

Thanks for having me, you guys.

[Kayla]

Bye.

[Sam]

Podcast ends now for our visual learners. You can watch full video episodes on our YouTube channel and subscribe to our

[Kayla]

Patreon for two extra episodes a month

[Sam]

at patreon.com Stradiolab Stradiolab is a production

[Kayla]

by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network

[Sam]

and iHeart podcast, created and hosted by me, George Severis and Sam Taggart, executive

[Kayla]

produced by Jenna Cagle, co produced by

[Sam]

Becca Ramos, edited by Lauren Stumpf and mixed and mastered by Doug Bain.

[Kayla]

Artwork by Michael Fails and Matt Grubb. Theme music by Ben Kling.

[Mistr Ad Voice]

Did you know you can get your prep for free? Mistr provides free prep and doxy pep prescribed online and delivered right to your door. No doctors are office. No needles, no drama. What are you waiting for? Sign [e-mail] today.

[Lambda Legal Ad Voice]

Dozens of executive orders. Thousands of anti LGBTQ bills, all designed to harm people we know. People we love the people we are. Every day, Lambda Legal is in court, fighting back. And when we take a stand, we're standing as the last line of defense between real human beings and horror. But we don't do it alone. With every act of support, you stand with us. And together we'll hold the line. Fund the [e-mail] donate this is Dr.

[Dr. Joy]

Joy from therapy for Black Girls. A fresh sparkling kitchen. Yes, please. The scrubbing it takes to get one. Not a favorite. That's why you'll love Dawn Power Wash. Just free from everyday dishes to the toughest messes, it makes cleanup twice as fast. Fast Less scrubbing, more living. Find Dawn Power Wash Dish Spray at your favorite retailer. Dawn is a proud sponsor of the Elton John Impact Awards, honoring those who have helped shape a more inclusive and compassionate world with their artistry, advocacy and unwavering commitment to equality. Don't miss the Elton John Impact awards podcast available June 1st on the iHeartRadio app. And everywhere podcasts are heard.

[George]

Professional wrestling fans, the action continues every week. Watch CNA Thursday night in Impact every week on amc. It is like electricity flowing through your veins. Don't miss the adrenaline, the drama and the total non stop action.

[Sam]

No one can ever be as good

[George]

as this right here. Don't miss the action of TNA Thursday Night Impact every week on AMC. For showtimes and more information visit tna

[Mistr Ad Voice]

wrestling.com this is an iHeart podcast.

[George]

Guaranteed Human.