StraightioLab Holiday Gift Guide 2025

Summary

StraightioLab: Holiday Gift Guide 2025

Podcast: StraightioLab (Big Money Players Network & iHeartPodcasts)
Hosts: George Civeris & Sam Taggart
Release Date: December 16, 2025
Episode Theme: A comedic, satirical, and genuinely creative holiday gift guide, tailored to the multifaceted lives and quirks of their (primarily queer) audience.

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Episode Overview

George Civeris and Sam Taggart don their cozy (and only somewhat ironic) holiday personas to offer an irreverent, highly specific, and surprisingly thoughtful 2025 holiday gift guide. True to StraightioLab’s “mirror-to-straight-culture” ethos, the duo roast, psychoanalyze, and ultimately delight in the wildly different gift needs of gays, straights, punks, grad students, activists, menswear guys, moms, and dads—serving ideas that are as funny as they are (occasionally) useful. The episode blends genuine holiday warmth with characteristic biting wit and self-aware intellect.

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Key Discussion Points, Gift Ideas & Notable Moments

Setting the Scene: Cozy Mode & Christmas Trees

• [03:31-07:59]
  • Both activate “cozy mode”: “Cozy Mode activated. We are just sitting here with a couple of big mugs of hot cocoa. Marshmallows overflowing, yummy, yummy. And we just couldn’t be cozier.” – Sam Taggart (03:36)
  • Holiday tree shopping: Sam recounts sad LA trees vs. George’s “perfect symmetrical” Canadian import:
    • “The Vermont ones were anemic… Whereas in Canada, they tell the truth.” – George (05:50)
  • Christmas tree toppers and phallic symbolism:
    • Sam prefers “ironic” toppers (like a Joanne pink cowboy hat or a winter hat ornament): “It’s kinda like, funny, like the tree’s wearing a hat.” – Sam (06:45)
    • George: “I don’t like that the angel is actually being fucked by the tree.” (07:07)

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Highbrow vs. Lowbrow Joys

• [08:02-11:53]
  • George justifies consuming “lowbrow” pleasures like “Heated Rivalry” hockey drama once a month as vital cultural maintenance:
    • “It’s important to have one big lowbrow thing per month... it keeps you down to earth; it helps you sort of keep up with the culture.” – George (08:30)
  • Discussion of “Heated Rivalry” and the lack of authentic “bear” representation in gay media:
    • “It’s specifically an offense to your community, the bear amorous community…they’re saying gay hockey show, can you believe, it’s gonna be these hairy bears…just kidding.” – George (10:19)
  • Side-note: Sam’s lowbrow pick for December is Survivor.

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Official StraightioLab 2025 Holiday Gift Guide

[13:09–54:46]

For the Busy Gay Guy

• GoGurt:
  • “For the busy gay guy in your life, get them a GoGurt. Because they’re on the go, work party, work party…it’s affecting their gut health. But with GoGurt, you can eat on the go and still be busy.” – Sam (14:55)
  • George riffs on sexualized branding: “Yoplay as a brand really sounds like a direct-to-consumer, kind of pure-for-men type sexual health product…Yoplay is for adult gay men that are consenting to various sexual acts your kids should not know about.” (16:45)

For the Cinephile (Self-Promotion Alert)

• George’s Special, “A Sense of Urgency”
  • Available on all platforms (“rent or buy, post about it, tag me”).
  • “All proceeds go to Democrats running in purple states with a leftist, very progressive agenda.” – George (18:17)
  • Also available as a “punk rock” USB stocking stuffer, creating “that lost media feel.” – Sam (19:37)

For the Aging Punk

• Mini Coffins for Removed Piercings
  • “Mini coffins for all the piercings that you are taking out…You have a little memorial, that era of your life is over now.” – Sam (20:37)
  • George adds: “You have open casket, you call all your former punk friends…they line up and pay their respects.”

For the Instagram Activist

• Life-Size Cross & Nails (Crucifixion Kit):
  • “So they can crucify themselves with the nails…a really beautiful community building experience…You can livestream it.” – George (22:50)
  • “As the country turns more right wing, I think having something, you know, religious in imagery is really current and contemporary.” – Sam (23:03)

For Moms Who Say They Want Nothing

• Cameo from Pink:
  • “Get her a cameo from Pink. She needs an experience. And what’s a better experience than being talked to by Pink?” – Sam (24:31)
  • “Imagine this…Pink goes, ‘Let’s raise a glass for Bonnie.’” – George (24:42)

For the Adult Menswear Guy

• Financial Times Subscription:
  • “They don’t know who’s president, but they do know who the creative director of Dior was in the 80s…” – George (26:51)
  • “Global politics is kind of like fashion—people are in style, people are out of style.” – George (27:14)
  • “It starts as an accessory…and then you get them in.” – George (27:39)
  • Related roast: “Do you design clothes, or are you just a guy? This is so weird.” – Sam (28:44)

For the Straight Guy

• Fresh Fleece:
  • “Not quite a shirt, not quite a jacket…It also softens them in a literal sense. Is that guy dangerous? No, he’s wearing a fleece.” – Sam (32:35)
  • On practicalities: “If they can’t get out of the fleece fast enough, suddenly there’s a gun out and they’re shooting...just because they can't get out of the quarter zip.” – George (33:54-34:02)

For the Rosalia Fan

• Ovid’s “Metamorphoses” (Latin Edition) + Baggie of Ketamine:
  • “You’re learning Latin actively, and you’re on ketamine...That’s what Rosalia has to offer us.” – George (34:46)
  • On high/low gifting: “Getting someone two things together is an amazing way to tell a story.” – Sam (35:27)

For Bear Party Promoters

• ‘Drawing for the Absolute Beginner’ (Anti-AI Manifesto):
  • “AI Party posters have gotten to such a fever pitch that I’m worried…the bear community is forgetting how to make a party poster without using AI…draw with your own hands the biggest guy you can think of…” – Sam (37:00)
  • “Bears are the boomers of the gay community…AI came out, bears immediately are using it.” – George (38:21)
  • “AI is to bear as what Facebook memes are to boomers.” – Sam (38:49)
  • “Just use old porn for the screen!” – Sam (40:05)

For Grad Students (Perpetually Abstracted from Reality)

• Blu-ray of “The Devil Wears Prada”:
  • “Pay attention to how people speak, that’s how normal people speak…There’s people from different class backgrounds…it’s all very kind of normal.” – George (41:20)
  • “It’s sort of an intro class in reality…” – Sam (41:44)
  • Other options: “When Harry Met Sally.”

For Babysitters

• Novelty Phone Cord for iPhone:
  • “They’ve lost something in not having a landline to call their boyfriend on anymore…give them a novelty cord…they can be the babysitter of their dreams.” – Sam (43:16)

For the Optimistic Midwest Woman

• Literal Wooden Room-Label Signs:
  • “Big, wooden hangable signs say in cursive the name of the room: ‘living room,’ ‘dining room’…they love labeling!” – George (45:27)
  • “Kind of postmodern…the Virgil Abloh, ‘dress’ in quotes.” – Sam (46:41)
• Variation: Neon “living room” signage for midwestern gay guys (for porn party mood), or “living room AF” for career gals in the West Village.

For Dads (Who Need Tasks)

• Plant Weeds (Not Weed):
  • “Dads are like cattle dogs—if they don’t have something to do, they will experience mental illness…If a dad has a yard full of weeds, he will then spend the rest of his life picking.” – Sam (48:42)
  • “It hits the same neurons as hunting and gathering.” – George (49:37)

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Reflections & Holiday Desires

• What’s on their personal wish lists?
  • Sam: Wants a framed photo of himself hung at his gym (“I feel a sense of almost like mayorship over it.”) (51:35)
  • George: Craves a secular, ethically-sound weekly gathering/church—“somewhere to go to kiki with my gals.” (52:14)
    • Bonus: Wants goggles that tell him if someone wants to have sex with him—“Just for me.” (52:55)
  • Both: Lament absence of instant, frictionless hang-out tech for friendship (“I just wish there was a way to be like looking for now, looking for now. I want to hang out.” – Sam [53:10])
  • On social technology: “You could say the desire to make it seamless and frictionless is a sort of late capitalist lie…but to that I say, how about you shut up?” – George (54:24)
• The big-picture mood:
  • “This holiday season really is about reflection. Zora Neale Hurston once said, ‘Some years are for asking questions and some years are for answering them.’ And I…think that in many ways, 2025 was for asking and 2026 we’re going to have to find some answers.” – George (55:02)

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Notable Quotes & Highlights

• “I don’t like that the angel is actually being fucked by the tree.” – George (07:07)
• “Yoplay is for adult gay men that are consenting to various sexual acts…” – George (16:45)
• “Global politics…is kind of like fashion. There are different leaders…people are in style, people are out of style.” – George (27:14)
• “Not quite a shirt, not quite a jacket. Hello. And it also softens them in a literal sense.” – Sam, on fleeces (32:35)
• “It’s time to go back to basics…and this is sort of an intro class in reality.” – Sam, on gifting The Devil Wears Prada Blu-ray to grad students (41:44)
• “Dads are sort of like cattle dogs where if they don’t have something to do, they will experience mental illness.” – Sam (48:45)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:31–07:59 | Cozy mode, Christmas tree hunting, toppers & tree sexuality
• 08:02–11:53 | Highbrow vs. lowbrow, “Heated Rivalry,” bear representation
• 13:09–54:46 | Holiday Gift Guide (see full section above for suggested gifts)
  • 14:55 | GoGurt for busy gays
  • 17:23 | George’s special “A Sense of Urgency”
  • 20:37 | Mini coffins for piercings
  • 22:50 | Cross & nails for Instagram activists
  • 24:31 | Pink Cameo for moms
  • 26:51 | Financial Times for menswear guy
  • 32:35 | Fleece for straight guys
  • 34:46 | Ovid and ketamine for Rosalia fan
  • 37:00 | Drawing book for bear party promoters
  • 41:20 | Devil Wears Prada for grad students
  • 43:16 | Phone cord for babysitters
  • 45:27 | Cursive room-name signs for Midwest optimist
  • 48:42 | Plant weeds for dads
• 51:30–54:46 | The hosts’ own wish-lists & reflections
• 55:02 | Zora Neale Hurston quote & year-end wisdom

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Tone & Language

• Warm, irreverent, allusive, politically aware, extremely “inside-baseball” in queer and alt cultural references
• Both self-effacing ("just kidding," “I know, I haven’t been going out as much”) and incisively critical
• Constant layering of irony with genuine care (especially about loneliness, longing, and the importance of community)

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Final Reflections

This episode crystallizes the heart of StraightioLab: fiercely smart, relentlessly queer, and emotionally honest, even within the silliest banter. Whether suggesting a GoGurt to replenish a hungry twink or a literal crucifixion kit for the Instagram activist, George and Sam highlight the absurdities—yet ultimate joys—of searching for belonging, meaning, and the perfect present.

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Happy holidays from StraightioLab—may your season be both “cozy mode activated,” and just the right amount of ironic.

Transcript

[George Severis]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human. Listen to your elders, honey. You might know them from their viral videos, but now the old gays are pulling back the curtain with their podcast Silver Linings with the Old Gays. Brought to you in partnership with iHeart's Ruby Studio and Vive Healthcare. Hosts Robert, Mick, Bill and Jesse share their favorite pride, memories and the importance of celebrating all year long in in honor of Palm Springs Pride. So check out Silver Linings with the Old gays on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts. Everybody knows Shaq, but off camera, he's just a regular guy.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

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[Commercial Announcer 2]

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[Sam Taggart]

Hello everyone, it's Sam with a quick announcement and that is that George and I are returning to San Francisco Sketchfest this year and we could couldn't be more excited. We're doing two shows this year, so the first one is on January 22nd and it is a stand up night with George and I splitting the bill. And then the second is on January 23rd and that is a classic Studiolab live show with guest segments, etc. Etc. Come to one, come to both. They'll both be wildly different and we're so excited to be back. We are now obsessed with San Francisco and can't wait to fall in love even harder. Tickets are in our bio and hope to see you there. Okay, bye.

[George Severis]

Podcast starts now. This is George Severis, co host of Stratiolab and my debut comedy special is now officially out on all platforms. It is called George A Sense of Urgency. It was filmed in New York City and you can watch it now on Amazon Prime Video, Apple TV, YouTube, Google Play, Vimeo, literally anywhere you can rent or buy movies and you can also listen to the album on Spotify, Apple Music, Amazon Music, and Tidal. It would mean so much to me if you watched it or if you listen to it. If you're a listener of this podcast, I hope you love it. Please rent it, buy it, post about it, tag me. It all makes a huge difference in this amazing media environment we find ourselves in. And I just wanna say thank you for listening to this podcast over the years. It is the only reason I was able to record a special in the first place. And your support means the world, and I love you. Enjoy the app.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, well, well. Podcast starts now.

[George Severis]

Wow. He has his holiday voice on everybody. It's cozy Mode activated.

[Sam Taggart]

Cozy Mode activated. We are just sitting here with a couple of big mugs of hot cocoa. Marshmallows overflowing, yummy, yummy. And we just couldn't be cozier. Snow is falling outside of both of our windows.

[George Severis]

Oh, global warming is over. I heard.

[Sam Taggart]

And global warming has been solved.

[George Severis]

Record amounts of snow in Los Angeles and New York City. That's what I'm seeing in my weather app.

[Sam Taggart]

That's what I'm seeing in my weather app.

[George Severis]

My mug of hot cocoa, big as a bathtub. I'm putting in my entire head, ostrich style. Anyway, I'm sip, sip sipping. You know, cozy mode activated could be kind of a big concept for us this year, because, of course, you invented Diva Mode activated.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, that's when you have a catheter in and you don't need to go pee anymore. That's when you're going diva mode.

[George Severis]

Do you have a tree yet?

[Sam Taggart]

I have a Christmas tree.

[George Severis]

Nice.

[Sam Taggart]

We got it the day after, two days after Thanksgiving. And it is gorgeous. Stunning. We've had. Last year, we had the saddest Los Angeles Christmas tree you could ever imagine. We went to a parking lot, of course, where there were, like, minions dressed as Santa inflatables all over the place. And we picked a tree that was so crooked and fucked up that it just, like, made us our home. Look so sa. And this year, we got a recommendation from a friend who loves Christmas, and we went to this beautiful nursery in Glendale.

[George Severis]

Oh, a nursery.

[Sam Taggart]

Yes. And we found a gorgeous and stunning perfect tree that's even still alive.

[George Severis]

Wow. Well, this is so New York versus la. Because, of course, I had a very different experience. Of course, trees are walking distance from me. They are being sold at every corner. All I have to do is go downstairs. Now, get this. There are two options in my neighborhood. One is from Vermont and one is from Canada. Now, you would think with the tariffs, first of all, you think Vermont would have better trees because of course, American made is always going to be one notch above when I tell you the Canadian trees are both better and cheaper.

[Sam Taggart]

Cheaper.

[George Severis]

I went with. I said, take me to Canadia, take me to Canada, Justin Trudeau, stamp my visa, because I'm coming in and I'm getting this perfect symmetrical tree. The Vermont or Mott ones were anemic. They were lying about the height. They were doing the thing where the bottom trunk and the top branch were so long and they were like, it's seven and a half feet. I said, I can see and I can see that the bulk of this tree is actually five feet. And you are lying to me. Which of course is an American tradition, especially in this era. Whereas in Canada, they tell the truth.

[Sam Taggart]

Thank God.

[George Severis]

So I got my beautiful Canadian tree. How do you feel about putting a topper on a tree?

[Sam Taggart]

Well, for me, you know, you can take the boy out of 2010, but you can't take the 2010 out of the boy. It's always gotta be a little bit ironic for myself.

[George Severis]

Oh, what kind of ironic topper are we talking?

[Sam Taggart]

So right now we have a little. It was an ornament, but it's like of a winter hat. It's like a little like. And we put that on top of the tree and it's kind of like, funny, like the tree's wearing a hat. You know, in the year 2016, when Lady Gaga's Joanne came out, we put of course, like a pink cowboy hat on top of it.

[George Severis]

Okay, I'm liking this. I think a hat, maybe that's what I've been searching for. Because I don't like a star. I really don't like an angel. I find it very off putting. I don't like that the angel is actually being fucked by the tree.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, I agree.

[George Severis]

I think that is very blasphemous and to be honest, in very poor taste. And so I don't want an angel up there. It seems like it would hurt so much with all the little rough leaves coming off.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, what with the bristles and all.

[George Severis]

What with the bristles and all. Of course. And I think a hat actually might be exactly what the doctor ordered. Ours is currently nude in a way that I actually find kind of erotic. Because you have just one big thick branch popping out on top.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I'm seeing the phallic imagery that you're working with, considering the angel in your mind is getting fucked up.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

So I can See how that would be appealing to you to leave it unsheathed.

[George Severis]

Mm, yes. Well, you know, I don't know if you've been watching Heated Rivalry.

[Sam Taggart]

I have not, actually, but it has.

[George Severis]

Really erotically charged our home in a way where everywhere I look, there's a phallus.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

You know, this. This show, you are someone who isn't afraid.

[George Severis]

You would think I would. I'm not afraid to watch the thing everyone's talking about. That's what you're saying?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. To watch the specifically lowbrow thing that everyone's talking about, you sometimes honestly run towards it in a way that I'm surprised by.

[George Severis]

You know, I think that it's important to have one big lowbrow thing per month that you are embracing, because I think it's so. And actually, this is going to be part of my gift guide is I have. This is an element that I'm working with a lot this year, is like. Okay, so here's what I'll say. People in our Patreon, our patronistas, as we call them, they accused me of the following. I said that it's time to go back to that. It's that it's time to leave back poptimizing and go back to, like, pretentious intellectualizing. And then they said that in the same breath, I was complaining about the Rosalia album being too sophisticated and being in 47 languages. They said, hypocrisy. Hypocrisy. This gay podcaster is a hypocrite. Okay. And so I think that it's not hypocrisy, it's that I think the default should be that you are striving for something smarter than yourself. But then once a month, you pick one lowbrow thing, and it keeps you down to earth. It helps you sort of keep up with the culture. You can't go into the trap of following every little thing that's coming out. But I think for me, December, it's Heated Rivalry.

[Sam Taggart]

That's very, very interesting, and I'm proud of you.

[George Severis]

Thank you.

[Sam Taggart]

And it is sexy. You do find it sexy?

[George Severis]

It is very sexy. I don't know if you. I'm trying to think if you would find these two specific boys sexy. My instinct is potentially.

[Sam Taggart]

No. For a hockey show. I was surprised at how twink coated they were.

[George Severis]

They were. Yes, they were. And they're also even smaller than they look. The camera, I think, uses some tricks to make them look super, super beefy. And of course, they are beefy, but they're beefy in the way that like a guy at the gym would be beefy.

[Sam Taggart]

Sure. It's just a missed opportunity because to have a hockey show, you really had a chance to showcase some beef on there.

[George Severis]

Well, I would say it's specifically an offense to your community, the bear amorous community, because it's almost. It's like dangling this in front of you. They're saying, there's a gay hockey show. Can you believe it's going to be these kind of like hairy bears? And they're saying, just kidding, just kidding.

[Sam Taggart]

Same twinks as always.

[George Severis]

Josh o' Connor and the other one.

[Sam Taggart]

And the other one. Mike Feist.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And for the record, challengers was sexy. Just because it's just so sexy.

[George Severis]

Well, they were basically challengers. They were basically women.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[George Severis]

Like me. Like, it's. You know how lesbians watch gay male porn and enjoy it? That's like you watching challengers. It was like you watching lesbian porn. Like those, they don't even register as men to you.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. And it was nice. I was like, I get it. I can see how people enjoy this.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, no, that's a really good point.

[George Severis]

Have you decided what your lowbrow thing is going to be for December?

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I'm still keeping up with Survivor, which is pretty low brow, I would argue. I'm seeing the CBS ads, you know.

[George Severis]

Oh, yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

But I know that heated rivalry is an HBO show, so here's the thing.

[George Severis]

Thank you for asking. Speaking of Canada, it's actually a Canadian original. It's on a TV channel called Crave in Canada. It was pretty like mid to low budget. It came out. They didn't think it was going to be that big of a hit. And then when it became a huge hit, HBO brought it over to the States. And that's, by the way, why it's about hockey.

[Sam Taggart]

Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it.

[George Severis]

You know who's silent throughout this whole process is Tate McCrae, one of the largest, one of the biggest hockey players in all of Canada. And it's really. She's not beating the. She's not beating the kind of politically conservative allegations by not commenting on the big gay hockey show.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, maybe she'll make a cameo at the very. Have you finished it?

[George Severis]

I haven't. Well, it's not all out. It's coming out week by week.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, my God. And not just that, but get this.

[George Severis]

First two episodes were following the two leads. Third episode, bottle episode, different gay couple.

[Sam Taggart]

What?

[George Severis]

They're not even in it. The original ones Aren't even in it.

[Sam Taggart]

Whoa.

[George Severis]

And you know what? Bottle episode couple, I think kind of hotter than original couple.

[Sam Taggart]

That hurts.

[George Severis]

And better narrative storytelling, to be honest. It was like a short film. It was Panic in Central park by Lena Dunham.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, you know, sometimes it's easier to make your point when it's a finite episode.

[George Severis]

I know. I agree. It's almost as though television is inherently flawed. Let's go into our main event.

[Sam Taggart]

So, you know, when this comes out, it is December 16th, I want to say, and you know, that means nine days left till Christmas.

[George Severis]

Ooh.

[Sam Taggart]

And we know that our, our listeners are some of the busiest people on earth and they just don't have time to be shopping and walking the mall and seeing what is the new offering at H and M. That's right. So we thought we would do some of that lifting for you and provide some amazing gifts for some key people in your life.

[George Severis]

That's right. And I'm glad you mentioned that our listeners are busy because with our listeners is half of them have really high power, high paying jobs, but then have to spend the other half of their life atoning for that because they have a conscience and they kind of like spend the day in the office and then the nighttime kind of self flagellating about being complicit in the system because they've read books. And then the other half are actually poor and working 17 jobs and all of them are kind of like flyering around the various coffee shops promoting a grunge show. So all in all, no one is being lazy. Everyone is being very hardworking, whether it's emotionally, physically, psychically, very active. And I think they all have mixed feelings about commerce and capitalism and they just want someone to tell them, you know, these are some ethical gift you can get.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. So we've come up with some amazing, amazing ideas that we're just going to sort of pitch. And I think you'll find that you're going to love them.

[George Severis]

Amazing.

[Sam Taggart]

So I can kick us off.

[George Severis]

Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

This actually is adjacent to what we were just talking about. We know our listeners are busy and we know your friends are busy and you're looking for a cheap option for, I'm going to say it, the busy gay guy in your life. We know if you have a gay guy in your life, he's busy. He's not responding to your texts. He's saying, I'm busy. This week was a mess. This week was crazy.

[George Severis]

Okay. Phil's pointed.

[Sam Taggart]

And so that's why I'm saying for the busy gay guy in your life, get them a gogurt.

[George Severis]

Perfect.

[Sam Taggart]

A go gurt, because they're on the go. Work party, work party. It's all exhausting. And these gay guys, they're forgetting to eat. They are forgetting to eat, and it's affecting their gut health. But with gogurt, you can eat on the go and you can still be busy.

[George Severis]

Still.

[Sam Taggart]

Even a go, go, go lifestyle. With yogurt it is.

[George Severis]

I'm so happy you brought this up because gogurt is one of those products that was marketed so incorrectly. Like this idea that it's for children, it's for busy moms. It's not. It's for gay guys that are going to the afters and they need a little snack, but it can't be solid and I'm not gonna get into it. And I think the flavors are kind of fun. I think a strawberry, a blueberry, a banana. And I think they, generally speaking, like eating yogurt. It has protein, it has probiotics, as you say. And I also think there's something kind of erotic about it. And, you know, rather than going out.

[Sam Taggart]

Yes.

[George Severis]

Rather than going outside, having a smoke, having a hit of your vape, have.

[Sam Taggart]

A gogurt, have a go Gurt.

[George Severis]

You're telling me you're gonna run into the other hot guy, the other your heated rivalry partner outside. He's gonna see you eating a gogurt. He's not gonna be instantly harsh.

[Sam Taggart]

You're essentially sucking cream out of a tube.

[George Severis]

Slurp, slurp, slurp.

[Sam Taggart]

I. I'm just like the way that sometimes moms get to eat kid snacks and get to blame the kid, but gay guys can't blame the kid.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

So we need to, like, go out and get the gogurt for the gay guys so they can eat it.

[George Severis]

No, you're absolutely right. And I think this is, you know, gogurt is something that has kind of fallen off in recent years. And I think rebranding it as a gay guy thing is really going to help help the company as well, I think.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, and Yoplait needs. Needs it now more than ever, by the way.

[George Severis]

Yoplay as a brand really sounds like a direct to consumer, kind of pure for men type sexual health product that is targeted for gay men. Yoplay.

[Sam Taggart]

Yo. You're saying I play?

[George Severis]

I'm saying you're getting YoPlay for your children. That is disgusting and that is so offensive. Yoplay is for adult gay men that are consenting to various sexual acts that your kids should not know.

[Sam Taggart]

About it's like on the apps, I think it could change the language. Gay guys would be like, do you and your partner play together? And we'll be like, well, you'll play with my partner, you'll play separate.

[George Severis]

Wow. Okay, well, that's a really great idea. And I'll go first. My first one is the most kind of basic one of the ones I brought for the cinephile in your life. You can get them, you can purchase or rent, but preferably purchase the feature film. George A Sense of Urgency now out on Amazon Prime, Apple TV, Vimeo, YouTube, Google Play and a variety of other places. And the album version actually, interestingly is out now on Spotify and Apple Music and Tidal if you want to support Beyonce.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

That's amazing. I've been hearing a lot about this special.

[George Severis]

I've been. Yes, exactly. Well, the Golden Globes just came out and I heard it was nominated in every category. It was shot in 35 millimeter, which I think people will really love in the cinema community. It was a co production between the first co production between A24 Neon and Democracy Now.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow. I love when legends link up.

[George Severis]

Yes. And all the proceeds go to Democrats running in purple states with a leftist, very progressive agenda. So they're all. We're getting single payer in Oklahoma and various other states. And all you have to do is purchase the special. It's actually very cheap. It's only like $4 to rent and like $9 to buy. It's available on all these different. In all these different countries. It's very inclusive. Recently found out it's not available in France, so. Why not? I don't know. You know, it's actually available in Botswana, but not France. And I'm not even kidding. So I do want to say, you know, my apologies, that is tough. Pardon?

[Sam Taggart]

Well, and maybe this is even. Maybe a. That means in France it's like super rare. It's like media that is. It's lost media in a way. Yes.

[George Severis]

In France it's lost media. You actually have to buy it from the people pirating little DVDs that. That kind of bus outside the subway station. Yes, they're selling that.

[Sam Taggart]

This is the version Z.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

And they're like, ooh, ooh, that's amazing.

[George Severis]

Yeah. So I think that could be a really, really beautiful stocking stuffer. Buy it. Maybe you know what's fun? Like put it on a little stick, a little USB stick and then put a little bow on that.

[Sam Taggart]

I think putting it on a USB stick is an Amazing way to sort of feel like you're hacking.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

Like, I do think whenever someone hands me a video file on a USB stick, I say, how the hell do you play? But life does find a way, and it's quite easy. And it adds a certain, again, lost media feel to it, a sheen. It gives it that punk rock edge.

[George Severis]

Yes. And my special is all about having a punk rock edge. So, anyway, stream my debut comedy special, George, a Sense of Urgency. And Sam, what is your next gift?

[Sam Taggart]

Well, speaking of punk rock edge, I actually have one that goes with this. This is for sort of the aging punk in your life. You know, say they're, you know, maybe where we are in age, they're sort of, you know, getting to that point where they're like, actually, they do have an office job now, and maybe they are sending emails a lot more than they ever thought they would. Here's what I think. I think for this person, that you need to get them mini coffins. Mini coffins for all the piercings that you are taking out.

[George Severis]

Oh.

[Sam Taggart]

Because they are. Now you're like, what am I doing with a septum piercing? What am I doing?

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

So you take it out and you put it in the coffin and you have a little memorial. You say, that era of my life is over now, and I'm putting it in the mini coffin.

[George Severis]

Maybe you have open casket and you call all your former punk friends, and they all line up. They all have babies at this point.

[Sam Taggart]

They all have babies and they're kind.

[George Severis]

Of in the throes of divorce, and they line up and kind of pay their respects to your septum, little septum ring in your little coffin. And I think, you know, there's a way you can either romanticize the past or kind of be ashamed of it and forget it. This is a good midway point. This is a celebration of life rather than a morning of death.

[Sam Taggart]

Exactly. You're paying respects to who you were and you're looking forward to who you will become. Both are valid.

[George Severis]

I love that.

[Sam Taggart]

But you gotta pay your respects and put the little septum piercing in the mini coffin.

[George Severis]

Well, I have one that is sort of related in the sense that it has to do with kind of with visual narratives around death and life. So this is a gift for the Instagram activist in your life. Now, this is not. We all have friends that are activists that, you know, are going to the big meetings and are involved in local politics and are canvassing for the big candidate. This is not for them. This is for the people who specifically are Logging in every day. They're sharing infographics, they're commenting. They are developing very complicated opinions about affordable housing that are kind of in theory only and not in practice. They have not been tested. And so this is for the. Specifically the Instagram activist in youn Life. It is a big life size cross and nails. So this is for them to actually, they can crucify themselves with the nails. And much like your idea where they can call their friends and have a little memorial service, this can be a really beautiful community building experience. They can call upon all their other online friends. You know, they haven't potentially left the house in months. They can meet these and then they can have a big crucifixion party. So they get the cross and they put their hands on the two sides and then the friends take turns hammering in the nails. And so then you are crucifying yourself and you can livestream it all on Instagram. So it can be.

[Sam Taggart]

It's very shareable.

[George Severis]

It's very shareable. It can be part of your Instagram practice. And you know, all the different comments that you could have done that day, a lot of that comes across through just one big crucifixion.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

That sounds so amazing. And you know, as the country of course turns more right wing, I think having something, you know, religious and imagery is really, really current and contemporary in a way that I think is super, really smart. In fashion.

[George Severis]

Yes. Oh my God, it is so fashion. And you can even partner with a local brand who was gonna make your little sarong that you're gonna wear.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I actually see the photo shoot and it's quite chic because you're showing off the abs, you're showing off the body. You have been working hard and all you do pretty much is go to the gym and share.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

And so this is an AM to sort of mix both of your hobbies.

[George Severis]

I think it could be really cool. And to do something that is so kind of Easter on Christmas is kind of unexpected.

[Sam Taggart]

That's true. I mean, and don't forget Christ.

[George Severis]

Don't forget.

[Sam Taggart]

Hello. That's half the word. Christ Mass.

[George Severis]

Okay, next.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay. Okay, here's something. Okay. Here's a gift for moms. Moms are so tough because they are always like, like, we don't want any more stuff. Like, they're like, enough. We have everything we need. Please don't get us anything. But, you know, they're still gonna want something on that special day on Christmas morning with all the cocoa in the world. So I'm Saying, for your mom this year, get her a cameo from Pink.

[George Severis]

Ugh, I love that.

[Sam Taggart]

Get her a cameo from Pink. She needs an experience. An experiential gift is so huge right now. And what's a better experience than being talked to by Pink?

[George Severis]

Imagine this. Your mom opens her email. She presses play. Pink goes. Let's raise a glass for Bonnie.

[Sam Taggart]

That would be so amazing.

[George Severis]

Your mom is crying. She is the she. She's holding a little. And by little, of course, I do mean large glass of Pinot Grigio. It's. She's accidentally spilling it. She's. She's crying real tears. She's saying, is that Pink?

[Sam Taggart]

Why? How does Pink know my name?

[George Severis]

She thinks it's a FaceTime. She's saying, pink. I loved the new album. We saw you with the kids in 2012. Well, now one of them is at Amherst. She's studying film studies, whatever that means. But I'm so happy she's coming back. She's bringing her her girlfriend. Who's they? She's they. The girlfriend.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. And I think, honestly, that catharsis. We know how hard it is for parents to get into therapy. I think if. If you show them a video of saying their name and the mom just kind of goes off speaking, that will maybe bring her therapeutic relief in a way that she hasn't had in decades.

[George Severis]

Oh, absolutely. I think Pink, generally speaking, is sort of a therapist for moms.

[Sam Taggart]

I'll say. Well, she's the only one that can speak to the pain and strife of, you know, life, period.

[George Severis]

Okay, let's see. Let's see. What else do I have here? Okay. Okay. So this is a gift for the adult men, menswear enthusiasts in your life. And it is a subscription to the Financial Times. Oh, yes. So, you know, these are guys who are very good at reading and reading about trends and shopping and using their money and kind of having the sixth sense where they know what's cool and what's not. What if they applied that amazing brain power to knowing who the heads of state in various countries and keeping up day to day with what's happening globally. These men are 37, 42, 45. They don't know who's president, but they do know who the creative director of Dior was in the 80s.

[Sam Taggart]

Thank you so much.

[George Severis]

I think this could be a really fun way, because global politics also is kind of like fashion. There are different leaders. People are in style, people are out of style. You can follow kind of like. Like who is hot and who is not. And potentially, you Know it. It could encourage you to kind of, like, connect with your fellow man in a way.

[Sam Taggart]

I think this is so genius. I mean, the way that, first of all, as an accessory, even someone with, you know, they're wearing head to toe, let's say, dress, and. And they, like, pull out their little iPad and start reading the Financial Times. I see they could even just be fake scrolling. And I say, that's kind of chic now. That's kind of fun.

[George Severis]

And I think that's actually reading that. That's how you get them in, is you say it starts as an accessory, and then you kind of like a Trojan horse. You get them. Suddenly they're reading. They're reading the front page. Suddenly they're reading about what's happening in the Ukraine. They're saying, I didn't know there was a country named Ukraine. I didn't know there was. I only know that Jonathan Anderson left Loewe. I didn't know there was a country named Ukraine. But they are reading this. They are texting their friends. They are saying, bro, you check this out. It's fire. That's what they're saying. That's what they're saying about the big article on Ukraine, a country they'd never heard of before. And so this is a really amazing way because, you know, these men, again, they are 37, they're 42, they're 45. They mean well, but they didn't know that there is a world outside of things like trends and podcasts and wide pants versus narrow pants. You know, how long shorts should be. You know, certainly they don't have jobs in the traditional sense, but once they start learning more about the world, maybe that'll lead them to, you know, let's say LinkedIn.com I mean, this is just.

[Sam Taggart]

Like, as a sidebar, when someone is like, I can't believe blank is leaving blank. Like, I can't believe Mark Stevenson is leaving Prada. Yeah, I'm always like, what are you talking about? Like, I'm. I do want to be like, look in the mirror. Like, do you design clothes or are you just a guy? This is so weird.

[George Severis]

It's also so divorced from who is actually buying anything. So the people actually buying things from, you know, let's say Louis Vuitton, are simply speaking, wealthy women buying bags in, you know, anywhere from China to France. Okay, fine. And then it, like, trickles down. And then there's like, a cool New York guy that somehow is knowledgeable of who the creative director is. They're like, this isn't for you.

[Sam Taggart]

It weirds me out big time because also it's like, it's like there's a, it reminds me of being in like middle school and like the one kid who really liked the Beatles. Like, it's like there's a, an allure to knowing something that like other people don't know completely and. But then you like, five years later you're like, wait, that was stupid. Like, why was a 8 year old obsessed with the Beatles?

[Commercial Announcer 2]

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[George Severis]

Listen to your elders, honey. You might know them from their viral videos, but now the Old Gays pull back the curtain on their podcast Silver Linings with the Old Gays, brought to you in partnership with iHeart's Ruby Studio and Vive Healthcare For a very special bonus episode. Hosts Robert Mitchell, Mick, Bill and Jesse talk about how pride has evolved over the years and their favorite memories, all in celebration of Palm Springs Pride, because pride should be celebrated all year round. Listen in to these fabulous friends swap stories exploring how queer life has evolved over the decades and the silver linings they've collected along the way. Each episode dives into hot topics, from safe sex and online dating to untangling Gen Z lingo, as well as insights on how music, art and fashion show up in queer culture. So check out Silver Linings, a show about how pride ages like fine wine, available on the iHeartRadio app or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

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[George Severis]

Of course. I don't want to make fun of the menswear guys because it's, it's certainly more interesting to me at least than keeping up with sports. So you want to reward them. You want to say, okay, good for you. You're actually taking something that is coded more feminine in our culture and making it your own. But sometimes maybe wear a loafer and not kind of an alternative croc.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, no, that's really smart. I actually have a fashion one, too.

[George Severis]

Oh, nice.

[Sam Taggart]

So this is a staple, as we all know, but it's important around Christmas to sort of re up the staples. So for the straight guy in your life, get him a fleece. Ah. No straight guy is ever upset with a fleece. It's perfect. Not quite a shirt, not quite a jacket. Hello. And it also softens them in a literal sense because you're saying, is that guy dangerous? And it's like, no, he's wearing a fleece. He can't be a bad guy. And it's sort of the literalization of a wolf in sheep's clothing, which I find really, really poetic. And fleeces, I'm gonna be honest, they get dirty. Yeah, they're getting dirty as hell.

[George Severis]

No, they have fully kind of cat like mothball stuck to them at all times.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, they're sort of cast iron pans.

[George Severis]

Yes, they are. You have to get the coat. You have to get a good coat on and then it gets even warmer.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, but that's why it's always important to re up on the fleece.

[George Severis]

We're talking like quarters ish, full zip.

[Sam Taggart]

You know, ideally quarter zip. But I get that straight guys get fussy and they need to get out of their jackets as quickly as possible.

[George Severis]

Sometimes they can throw a tantrum.

[Sam Taggart]

They can. I mean, I've seen straight guys choke because they can't get out of it fast enough.

[George Severis]

Yeah, no, sometimes if they can't get out of the fleece fast enough, suddenly there's a gun out and they're shooting. They're shooting at whoever's in front of them just because they can't get out of the quarter zip.

[Sam Taggart]

So I do. You know, it's high fashion, the quarter zip, of course, but you could just do full zip if they are scared of getting stuck in it.

[George Severis]

And it's different for every man. And it depends on how you're raising him and the types of things he's learning at any given moment. Not everyone is along the same path. Some men are ready for a quarter zip by age 35. Some need more training.

[Sam Taggart]

Some need more training. We're all on different paths. We're all on different paths. And I think it's just such an amazing piece of clothing.

[George Severis]

Okay, I have one. So this is for the Rosalia fan in your life. It is Metamorphoses by Ovid in the original Latin. And then as an added stocking stuff for a little baggie of ketamine.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay, now this is interesting.

[George Severis]

Isn't that Fun.

[Sam Taggart]

This is high low.

[George Severis]

Yes, it's high low, you know, And I think that's what Rosalia has to offer us. You know? It is. You're learning Latin actively, and you're on ketamine.

[Sam Taggart]

It's sort of like the beer shot. Like, there's something you get a little bit of both. That's really nice because it's both.

[George Severis]

Both.

[Sam Taggart]

It's saying, grow, and it's saying, but you're fine the way you are.

[George Severis]

Yes, exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

It's a bit of a born this way narrative.

[George Severis]

Yes, it's very born this way. I think high low gifts in general are kind of like a fun thing everyone can do. You know, get one thing, you know, a really kind of like, beautiful handmade bookend or something, and then supplement it with just a Jolly Rancher loose.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, getting someone two things together is an amazing way to tell a story.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

It's just. And what. You're telling a story with this combo that. I know that person. I know that Rosalia fan. And in some respects, I wish I was that Rosalia fan. It's aspirational.

[George Severis]

It's someone that doesn't want to commit to any one narrative. They're showing up to the theater, but they're wearing kind of like a thong. Like a diamond thong. Then they're going to the club, but they're reading a book. They want to be the high. The highbrow person at the lowbrow function and the lowbrow person at the highbrow function.

[Sam Taggart]

This is such a type. I call it Loud and quiet Places. Quiet and loud.

[George Severis]

Yes, exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

It is such a type. And, you know, I often find myself around these people, and so I'm. I'm really grateful that you've offered me this gift for them.

[George Severis]

Yeah, no, I do, too. And I weirdly think it's kind of. Dare I say, that's the new hip archetype. Like, you know how we used to have the hipster, or we used to have the, like, you know, the hippie in the. In the 60s or whatever, or the club kid or whatever. I think this is now the new cool young person is Quiet and loud places. Loud and quiet places.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. They like just being generally a fish out of water no matter where you are.

[George Severis]

Yes, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Because it's like, oh, well, you're a fish. Well, then I'll put you in water. And he's like, well, now that I'm in water, I'm not a fish anymore.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow. This is really groundbreaking.

[George Severis]

I love it.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay. I Have. Here's one. This one is near and dear to my heart. This is for any bear party promoters in your life. You know, anywhere from Nowhere Bar to the Eagle, they are promoting bear parties and that is valid and someone has to do it. They're doing the work. But what I think you should get for the bear party promoter in your life is a book called Drawing for the Absolute Beginner. So this, I think the bear community has been hit harder by AI than any community on earth. I will say I think the AI Party posters have gotten to such a fever pitch that I'm worried. I'm worried that the bear community is forgetting how to make a party poster without using AI and so I think you can draw with your own hands the biggest guy you can think of and he can have a big beard and he can have a big belly and he can have a big bulge and you can do it all yourself. And you can even find a meditation in that. And I think that will be both a fun project for the holidays, maybe drawing your own party poster and it could maybe get you to feel something.

[George Severis]

Yeah. And I think the bear community is kind of the boomers of the gay community. And I don't mean that age wise. Some of them are as young as 22, 23. But I think that somehow they become vulnerable to these things in the way that other people don't, you know, And I'm not saying other communities don't have their own flaws, but AI came out, bears immediately are using it. And then when someone comments, you know, please don't use AI, they're like, what is this that they don't even know?

[Sam Taggart]

It's like, you used it.

[George Severis]

You used it.

[Sam Taggart]

You're fully right. I do think AI is to bear as what Facebook memes are to boomers. It's just like we gave it to them before we asked if we should. And it's spread like wildfire and it's creating sort of a parallel world that is unhealthy for everyone.

[George Severis]

No, it's really bad. And I think that bears, bears also, you know, bears are also vulnerable, let's say to maybe an Instagram native jockstrap company. It's made of microplastics. They're not going to do the research. They're not going to look up, you know, where is this made in the usa? Is this union made? They're going to press order. And I think that getting mad at them is not really helping anyone. It's like yelling at your parents because they have motion smoothing on their TV or whatever people are obsessed with talking about. It has to be a kind of inclusive model where it's education forward, you're having a dialogue with them, and potentially even going into the bear club and saying, so what is this that I'm seeing on the screen? Why is this a cartoon that is dancing and it has three arms?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. Whatever happened to just pulling up old porn? Just do old porn and put that on the screen.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

I don't need a psychedelic bear turning into a wolf, turning into a man turning into a bear turning into a wolf. It actually makes me a bit nauseous.

[George Severis]

Yeah. Okay, Well, I have. Bears, of course, are a big part of the Strader Lab listenership, and I have a gift for another very big chunk of the straighter Lab listenership, which is grad students. So this is an amazing gift for the grad student in your life. It is a Blu Ray of the film the Devil Wears Prada. Now, hear me out. This is kind of out of the box. So I was trying to think, what is a movie that's kind of just normal? If you watch the Devil Wears Prada, pay attention to how people speak. That's how normal people speak. They kind of speak in simple, short sentences. They reference objects that exist in the world and that are not kind of theoretical concepts that only you and your three friends know. There's kind of clear conflict. There's a clear villain. It's all very kind of normal. And so if you watch that, you'll kind of get the sense there's people from different class backgrounds in there. There's people of different. Different genders, but in, like, it just in a way that actually exists in the normal world and not just in a book you read.

[Sam Taggart]

I think this is so amazing because it's like, you know, they love to learn.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

And what you're doing is giving them an educational text because, you know, in the same way that we've, like, lost Home EC and now no one knows how to cook anything, we've lost, like, just sort of socializing, and it's time to go back to. Back to basics. And this is. This is sort of an intro class in reality.

[George Severis]

Normal. Yeah. And in basic reality, you know, grad students learn so much about things that aren't reality, and I think that's also really important. And it's obviously very important to broaden our horizons and start kind of knowing words like the Anthropocene. Of course, we all have to. We all have to interact with that occasionally, you know, but not 100% of the time, actually, sometimes it can be cool to be just really, like, rooted in reality for at least 50% of the week.

[Sam Taggart]

I would say say, yeah, 50% is a good percentage.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

Yes.

[George Severis]

I would say a good. Again, much like the high, low thing, I would say if you're rooted in reality for 50% of the week and then rooted in theoretical concepts for the other 50%, you can kind of then bring it together at the end of the week every Friday and say, got it. So that's what I learned. This is how I can apply these theoretical concepts to the real world and these real concepts to my theoretical studies. But once you're sort of in the theoretical world for more than 50% of the week, you start to not make sense anymore.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, Yeah. I think this is really, really, really helpful. And, I mean, Devil wishpad is perfect for that.

[George Severis]

I know.

[Sam Taggart]

I was trying to think of a more perfect movie.

[George Severis]

Yeah, I was trying to think of another. There just is something that is, you know, because I don't want to give them something that is too rooted in reality.

[Sam Taggart]

I was almost thinking, like, When Harry Met Sally or something.

[George Severis]

Yes, that could work.

[Sam Taggart]

Like, something that's like. So this is what relationships are. And they can be complex. Complex, yes. And change. But, yeah, that's a really good one. And it also teaches them about fashion.

[George Severis]

Oh, my God.

[Sam Taggart]

So that's really helpful.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay, let's see. Okay. This is for all the babysitters in your life. So it's always tough when you're like, have a babysitter. We don't have children, of course, but we really know that babysitters exist. And maybe our listeners have kids and have a babysitter. So we were thinking. Well, I had this thought. I think for the babysitter, the perfect thing is a novelty cord for the phone. So you have an iPhone. You have a babysitter on the iPhone. But they've lost something in not having a landline to call their boyfriend on anymore, where they can't sort of, like, fiddle with the cord and really feel in touch with who they're speaking to via the cord. And I think giving a babysitter a novelty cord for their iPhone, it's like giving an audio file a vinyl. It's just like, they get to feel it in a different way. I think this is, like, exactly what babysitters need to more actively be in the moment speaking with their boyfriend and ignoring the children.

[George Severis]

I agree. And I actually think, obviously they have to ignore the children, but it's important to at least remember where they are in physical space and time. And I think when you're on the phone and there's nothing rooting you to the real world, you kind of can forget. And then the children could even, like, leave the home or kind of jump out a window, potentially go into the other room, start eating glue. At least when you're playing with the chord, it's like rooting you in space and time. And then you're more aware of sounds and movements in your immediate vicinity. So you can talk to your boyfriend, but then you hear the scream from the kitchen. You know, okay, I should check in on little Lucy.

[Sam Taggart]

I should check in. Well, there's like, you know, in the same way that, like, you know, if you're thinking about music, you're like, oh, my God, the 60s. Like, I just want to be in the 60s or something. And, like, when you're thinking about babysitting, all you're thinking about is like, God, I wish it was the 90s. That was peak babysitting culture. And I think this will really transport any babysitter to that time, and they can be the babysitter of their dreams. Love that.

[George Severis]

I have one that I just thought about that. I think we could make work.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay.

[George Severis]

This is a gift for kind of optimistic women in the Midwest who just want everything to be nice. Okay, so this is. It's a set. It's a set of big, wooden hangable signs, and each of them say in cursive the name of the room where they are going to be hung in. So there is one that says living room in cursive. You put it in the living room. There's one that says dining room in cursive. You put it in the dining room. This might seem almost outdated. You know, of course, we've had Home Sweet Home pillows forever. You know, I'm not the first person to. To satirize the Pinterest aesthetic, but there's something about the literal nature of these that I think is so fun. You know, these kinds of gals, they love labeling. They love you know, purchasing a label maker, having a little box, and then it says stamps on it, you know, And I think there's something kind of nice about just organizing the home and saying, this is the living room. And that's why there's a sign in it that says living room and cross cursive.

[Sam Taggart]

I think that's really, really amazing. I think it. It's like, postmodern in this weird way.

[George Severis]

Yes, exactly. Exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, it reminds me of the. Like, what's the like this is not a pipe or whatever.

[George Severis]

Yes, this is not a pipe. But also. Or like the Virgil Abloh. Like the dress, the off white dress that says dress in quotes.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, yeah.

[George Severis]

It's bringing that into the Pinterest age.

[Sam Taggart]

I really do think this melds a lot of different things because there's also things to play with. Where. Can you imagine putting the living room sign in the kitchen?

[George Severis]

Yeah, no, exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

That would like, call the MoMA. That would really change things.

[George Severis]

And speaking of calling the MoMA, there's actually a second part of this which is if you have gay guy friends and maybe even bear gay guy friends. Gay guy couples in the Midwest. Same set, but in neon. Neon signs that say, living room, bathroom, dining room, kitchen.

[Sam Taggart]

That's good.

[George Severis]

Like old fashioned looking, you know, maybe repurposed so it's green old fashioned looking kind of bar. Neon signs.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow, that sounds really amazing. I mean, I can see it now on sort of a weird amateur porn.

[George Severis]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

Where they had like a sex party and there are all these signs in different rooms and there's like all these finger foods for some reason. And I can. They would just fit in the background so well, it'd be like, oh, where are they having sex? And it'd be like, that's the bedroom. It says bedroom in neon.

[George Severis]

Yeah. And I actually, you know, it's interesting. I'm thinking about it. There's another. There's another set that's available which is. It's for kind of career gals in New York City that live in the West Village. And so it is a set, but they're actually, actually framed pieces of paper where it's handwritten and it says, living room AF bedroom AF bathroom af.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow. I mean, that sounds so fucking powerful. Okay, I have another one.

[George Severis]

Okay. Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

This is for the dads. As we all know, dads are sort of like cattle dogs where if they don't have something to do, they will experience mental illness.

[George Severis]

Correct.

[Sam Taggart]

So I have decided that the perfect gift for the dads out there is planting weeds. Not weed. The drug weeds. If you can fill a yard with weeds, a dad. It's like, again the dog metaphor, I'm kind of stuck on. But it's like when you give a dog a little sniffing puzzle and it activates their brain. If a dad has a yard full of weeds, he will then spend the rest of his life picking wee out of the yard. And it'll stop him from cognitive decline. It'll keep him in peak physical shape. It's sort of exactly what you need For a dad. Because, again, if they start sitting still, they'll die.

[George Severis]

Yeah, it's complicated because moms, of course, without anyone needing to tell them, do work around the house. You know, they are cleaning, they're cooking, and this is something. And then meanwhile, as they're doing quite literally 100% of the housework, the dad is walking around saying, God, I am bored. I am bored. There is nothing to do around here now. She is doing 15 loads of laundry a day. She's going to the dry cleaner. She is color coding all the different mugs. The dad is saying, oh, my God, is this all there is to life? And so it's important to kind of give him a task, preferably outdoors, because it hits the same neurons that it would hit if he was hunting and gathering.

[Sam Taggart]

Yes. Yeah. Because, well. And to be fair, whenever he does anything indoors, he messes everything up.

[George Severis]

And now we said it.

[Sam Taggart]

So get him outside. Give him a task that's easy, like pulling weeds.

[George Severis]

Okay. I love it.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, I'm done. Well, those were some amazing gifts. Yeah, I'm pretty much done. Is there anything we want to. George, what's. I got to know, what's number one on your Christmas list this year?

[George Severis]

Oh, that's a good question. What is number one on my Christmas list? What's number one on yours?

[Sam Taggart]

I know it's a tough one. I think, you know, it's hard for me to want because I just joined a gym, and the gym is the greatest place I've ever been, and it's heaven on earth. And every day I go there, I say, this is my fucking sanctuary. And I think, if anything, I would want them. I think a great present for me would be if someone were to take a photo of me and hang it in the gym. And really, like, I've only been there for one week, but I feel a sense of almost like mayorship over it.

[George Severis]

Wait, you want someone to hang a photo of you in the gym to kind of celebrate that you joined?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[George Severis]

And to announce to everyone, this is the new member. Say hi if you see him. His name is Sam. Say hi.

[Sam Taggart]

Say hi. And even to be like, hey, you're gonna be seeing this guy a lot. Like, let's just cut to the part where we all love each other, because you're gonna get used to this face.

[George Severis]

Y. I would actually. I'm also in a very community oriented spot right now. I would love a kind of church that is ethically sound. It doesn't have to be rooted in religion. It doesn't have to be rooted in a specific intellectual tradition. But I would absolutely love every Sunday to have somewhere to go to kiki with my gals.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, George, have you considered the value of queer nightlife?

[George Severis]

I think you're probably right. I think I need to get my gogurt. I need to order a 12 pack of Go Gurt from Costco and put a couple in my back pocket and go out clubbing.

[Sam Taggart]

You need to go out. I know for a fact you've not been going out as much.

[George Severis]

I know I haven't been going out as much.

[Sam Taggart]

And that is how you connect with community.

[George Severis]

Yeah. I also would like a product that is gonna be just for me. I actually don't think anyone else should have access to it. It where I put goggles on and they tell me if someone is wanting to have sex with me or not.

[Sam Taggart]

Or just for men, but just for.

[George Severis]

Jordan or just for me. And then. And the. Exactly. And. And I can also. It can also kind of, if I want to or don't want to have sex with them, it can kind of laser that into their brain, and then it can sort of be fixed.

[Sam Taggart]

That's amazing. Similarly, I want an app that's like Grindr or Sniffies even, but it's just for which friends want to hang out at which time. Because I feel so much shame when I text someone want to hang out, and they're like, I'm not free or I'm out of town. Like, then I'm like, God, I'm a fucking idiot. Like, why would I ever think that they would be in town? And then I recoil, and so. And then I have that fear of texting people to hang out, out. And I just wish there was a way to be, like, looking for now. Looking for now. I want to hang out. I want to hang out.

[George Severis]

I know we are both touching on this need for community. And I think of both of us as people who do have community and who are kind of really putting in the hours of seeing people in real life and meet space, as they say. And yet it's not quite. We don't have the technology available yet to make it as seamless and frictionless as possible. Of course, you could say the desire to make it seamless and frictionless is a sort of late capitalist lie. And that part of being human is embracing all the imperfections of social life. But to that I say, how about you shut up?

[Sam Taggart]

Well, this is also why we need more spaces. If I go to, say, the eagle on a Thursday night, I'm saying, looking for now socially and everyone else that's there is also, in theory, looking for now socially and then we can socialize there. But you know, as these spaces die, it's sort of like, where do you go just to hang out with people in a casual sense.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And the answer is my amazing gym. Well, this has been our amazing gift guide. We hope that you found it helpful and we hope you have an amazing holiday season, whatever it is you're getting up to.

[George Severis]

We hope you have an amazing holiday season. We hope that you are activating cozy mode. I think this holiday season really is about reflection. Zora Neale Hurston once said, some years are for asking questions and some years are for answering them. And I actually think that in many ways 2025 was for asking and 2026, we're going to have to find some answers. So this is our last chance. These next two weeks are our last chance to kind of of think on all the various questions that have been asked, many of them really offensive ones, many of them productive ones. And I think once it's January, it's time to start taking some action.

[Sam Taggart]

It's time to start taking some action. Oh, brother. Oh brother. Wow, what an amazing yawn to end cozy mode.

[George Severis]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay, bye.

[George Severis]

Love you guys. Happy holidays.

[Sam Taggart]

Bye. Podcast ends now. Want more?

[George Severis]

Subscribe to our Patreon for two extra episodes a month. Discord Access and more by heading to patreon.com Stradiolab and for all our visual learners.

[Sam Taggart]

Free full length video episodes are available on our YouTube.

[George Severis]

Now get back to work.

[Sam Taggart]

Stradiolab is a Production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts.

[George Severis]

Created and hosted by George Severis and Sam Taggart.

[Sam Taggart]

Executive produced by Will Ferrell Hansani and Olivia Ag Aguilar.

[George Severis]

Co produced by Bay Wang.

[Sam Taggart]

Edited and engineered by Adam Avalos.

[George Severis]

Artwork by Michael Fails and Matt Grubb.

[Sam Taggart]

Theme music by Ben Kling.

[George Severis]

Then the space hamster flew his hot air balloon all the way to the bottom of the ocean. Where did that story come from?

[Sam Taggart]

Books?

[George Severis]

Dream? Nope. It came from a conversation. Meet Mikomini, the AI companion that co creates personalized story adventures with your child in real time. What color was the hamster's cape and what did he pack for lunch? Unlock your child's imagination. Discover Miko Mini plus and the Magic of AI Exclusively at Costco. Honestly, Honestly.

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[George Severis]

Sponsored by Gilead this is Julian Edelman from Dudes on Dudes with Gronk and Jules. Sunday mornings I've got my game Day Riches ritual, coffee, Lucky socks and now New Morning Uncrustable Sandwiches.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

It's all about that 12 gram protein boost with the new Uncrustables Bright Eyed Berry or Up and Apple flavors.

[George Severis]

Bright Eye Berries got a feisty receiver.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

Energy up an apple. Your classic do it all tight end.

[George Severis]

Soft, pillowy, packed with protein and easy enough enough for Grunk to grab from the freezer.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

Whether you're on the couch, driving to the tailgate or heading to the locker room, New Morning Uncrustable Sandwiches are the MVP of snacks.

[George Severis]

Your new Sunday kickoff ritual starts here with New Morning Uncrustable sandwiches. Packed with 12 grams of protein, this is an I heart podcast. Guaranteed human.