"Valentine's Day" w/ D'Arcy Carden

Summary

Podcast Summary: StraightioLab – "Valentine's Day" featuring D'Arcy Carden

Episode Information:

• Title: StraightioLab
• Host/Author: Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcasts
• Episode: "Valentine's Day" with D'Arcy Carden
• Release Date: February 18, 2025

Overview: In this episode of StraightioLab, hosts George Severus and Sam Taggart are joined by acclaimed actress and comedian D'Arcy Carden. The trio delves deep into the intricacies of Valentine's Day, examining its place within straight culture and its broader societal implications. Through witty banter and insightful discussions, they unpack the pressures, expectations, and cultural norms associated with this widely celebrated holiday.

---

1. Introduction and Setting the Stage (02:20 - 05:00)

The episode kicks off with casual conversation about Los Angeles and introduces a playful game idea initially named "Heimlich," later renamed "Heim Pick." The hosts set a relaxed atmosphere, highlighting their comfort in an informal setting reminiscent of a living room.

Notable Quotes:

• D'Arcy Carden [02:50]: "We never did the game that I invented, Heimlich. It didn't catch on."
• Sam Taggart [03:04]: "I think we're not dead yet. And I think we can play it today."

2. Personal Anecdotes and Behind-the-Scenes Stories (05:00 - 15:00)

D'Arcy shares humorous and personal stories, including experiences from working on Hollywood Handbook and her time on the set of The Good Place. The conversation touches on the challenges of background work in acting and the dynamics of being in the entertainment industry.

Notable Quotes:

• D'Arcy Carden [05:24]: "I kept kind of imagining... I wasn't doing that now. They're not meant to be silent."
• Sam Taggart [10:02]: "I have a bit about how all the women in Marvel movies have beach waves to soften the blow of the fact that they're spreading American imperialism."

3. The Pressure of Appearances and Societal Expectations (15:00 - 30:00)

The discussion shifts to the societal pressures surrounding appearances, especially during holidays like Valentine's Day. The hosts and D'Arcy critique the commercialization of love and the expectation to conform to certain standards of romance and gifting.

Notable Quotes:

• Sam Taggart [25:08]: "Context is so contigo, girl."
• D'Arcy Carden [25:31]: "Holy shit. I need to read Rules of fashion hard. I'm really in my sweatshirt. Well, bad fitting pants era."

4. Valentine's Day: A Cultural Analysis (30:00 - 50:00)

D'Arcy leads a segment focusing specifically on Valentine's Day, exploring its roots in straight culture and how it has evolved—or perhaps devolved—over time. The conversation critiques the enforced nature of the holiday, emphasizing the conflict between genuine expressions of love and societal expectations.

Notable Quotes:

• D'Arcy Carden [41:14]: "It's getting harder today than it was a couple years ago."
• Sam Taggart [44:27]: "That's like the purge, but for being straight and sexual."

5. Rapid-Fire Segment: Straight Shooters (50:00 - 60:00)

The trio engages in the "Straight Shooters" segment, a rapid-fire round where they choose between two options. The playful nature of this segment adds levity to the episode, showcasing their chemistry and humor.

Notable Quotes:

• D'Arcy Carden [32:33]: "Ooh, Dora the Explorer."
• Sam Taggart [33:16]: "The feet of Florence Welch."

6. Shout Outs and Final Thoughts (60:00 - End)

In the final segment, "Shout Outs," the hosts pay homage to various individuals, shows, and moments they enjoy. This segment serves as a playful conclusion, reinforcing the episode's themes while celebrating pop culture references.

Notable Quotes:

• Sam Taggart [85:07]: "What's up freaks, losers, and perverts around the globe?"
• D'Arcy Carden [90:14]: "You're doing the good, good Lord's work."

---

Key Discussions and Insights:

1. Commercialization of Valentine's Day:

   • The hosts dissect how Valentine's Day has been co-opted by commercial interests, turning genuine expressions of love into transactional exchanges.
   • D'Arcy Carden [42:31]: "It's like the beginning of force-fed straight culture."

2. Societal Expectations and Mental Health:

   • The pressure to conform to traditional romantic norms can lead to anxiety and a sense of inadequacy.
   • D'Arcy Carden [45:05]: "I like, don't tell me when to kiss someone. Don't tell me when to love my family."

3. The Evolution of Holiday Traditions:

   • The conversation highlights the shift from intimate, personal celebrations to broad, homogenized observances.
   • Sam Taggart [42:34]: "Feb 14th... force-fed straight culture."

4. Impact on LGBTQ+ Communities:

   • While Valentine's Day is rooted in straight culture, there's an acknowledgment of its universal themes of love that transcend sexual orientation.
   • Unknown Participant [26:45]: "Creating new interpretations of Bridget Jones's Diary."

5. Balancing Tradition and Modernity:

   • The episode explores the tension between maintaining traditional practices and adapting to contemporary values and identities.
   • D'Arcy Carden [25:03]: "I make my own rules, but it's kind of nicer."

---

Conclusions:

The episode concludes with a nuanced understanding of Valentine's Day as both a reflection of and a pressure point within straight culture. By bringing in personal anecdotes and cultural critiques, the hosts and D'Arcy Carden encourage listeners to question societal norms and seek authenticity in their expressions of love.

Final Takeaway: Valentine's Day, while celebrated globally, embodies the complexities of societal expectations, commercialization, and cultural identity. Recognizing these layers allows individuals to navigate the holiday with greater awareness and intentionality.

---

Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• D'Arcy Carden [02:50]: "We never did the game that I invented, Heimlich. It didn't catch on."
• Sam Taggart [25:08]: "Context is so contigo, girl."
• D'Arcy Carden [41:14]: "It's getting harder today than it was a couple years ago."
• Sam Taggart [42:34]: "Feb 14th... force-fed straight culture."

---

Closing Remarks: This episode of StraightioLab offers a blend of humor, personal storytelling, and cultural analysis, making it a compelling listen for those interested in exploring the deeper meanings behind everyday traditions like Valentine's Day. Whether you're celebrating the holiday or seeking to understand its impact on society, the thoughtful discussions in this episode provide valuable insights.

Transcript

[Darcy Carden]

Where'd you get those shoes? Easy. They're from dsw. Because DSW has the exact right shoes.

[George Severus]

For whatever you're into right now.

[Darcy Carden]

You know, like the sneakers that make.

[Sam Taggart]

Office hours feel like happy hour, the.

[Darcy Carden]

Boots that turn grocery aisles into runways, and all the styles that show off the many sides of you, from daydreamer to multitasker and everything in between. Because you do it all in really great shoes. Find a shoe for every you at.

[George Severus]

Your DSW store or dsw.com Lowe's knows.

[Darcy Carden]

How to help you get the most out of your store run. That's why members save more with Mylo's rewards. Earn points towards Mylow's money on eligible purchases. Get access to member only deals and free member gifts. Plus unlock free standard shipping when you.

[Unknown]

Reach silver key status.

[Darcy Carden]

So what are you waiting for?

[Unknown]

Join for free.

[Darcy Carden]

Today Lowe's we help you save loyalty.

[Unknown]

Programs subject to terms and conditions.

[Darcy Carden]

Details@lowe's.com Terms subject to change.

[Unknown]

At Ameca Insurance, we know it's more.

[George Severus]

Than just a car or a house.

[Sam Taggart]

It's the four wheels that get you.

[George Severus]

Where you're going and the four walls that welcome you home. When you combine auto and home insurance with Amica, we'll help protect it all. And the more you cover, the more.

[Unknown]

You can save Ameca.

[George Severus]

Empathy is our best policy.

[Sam Taggart]

You know, some people say that Odoo business management software is like fertilizer, the way it promotes growth and all. But other people say Odoo is like a magic beanstalk because it grows with your company and is also magically affordable. And there's some people who would even say Odoo's individual software programs come together to build the perfect suite. Like building blocks. Well, Odoo is all of these things. Fertilizer, magic beanstalk. Building blocks for business. So sign up [e-mail] o d o.

[Darcy Carden]

O.Com.

[Sam Taggart]

Podcast starts now. What's up? Everyone around the globe, the vibes are already electric. It's Friday. It's sunn as fuck.

[Unknown]

It's Friday in Los Angeles and I'm living out loud.

[Sam Taggart]

I want to say I'm feeling so electric. George is in town still and it is so nice.

[Unknown]

You know what we never did, speaking of Los Angeles, is the game that I invented, Heimlich never caught on, which is where you say three things and then you have to decide which one's the Daniel Heim, which one is the Esti Heim, and which one is the Alana Heim.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I think we're not dead yet. And I think we can play it today.

[Unknown]

Yeah. And I also. I know that you thought of the name Heimlich, and I like it, but I'm like, I thought of this. Yeah, you thought of it. What if it's Heim Pick? Cause you're picking one to be each of the servers. Sure.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, not to be. We were talking about Hollywood Handbook. I think you're a bit Hollywood Handbook pill. And you're really zeroing in on some puns in a way that. Oh, that's true.

[Unknown]

I'm being very well. I do want to make it public that I am officially Hollywood Handbook pill.

[Sam Taggart]

Me too.

[Unknown]

When we went into Hollywood, which, if you're listening to this, maybe that hasn't come out, we did Hollywood Handbook. I went and I said, first of all, this is a competition. And second of all, I'm winning.

[Sam Taggart]

I said, just let them win. I.

[Unknown]

No, no, no, no.

[Sam Taggart]

These straight guys are bigger than me. They're better than me. Let them have their fun.

[Unknown]

When we were, like, sparring, like when Hayes was, like, clearly being sort of like, in a funny way, mad at me, I was like, you think I'm going to back down? You have it all wrong, my friend.

[Sam Taggart]

You're so good at conflict. I normally, in a normal.

[Unknown]

I am going to go.

[Sam Taggart]

In a normal episode, I would say let's intro. Intro. Intro.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

No, we have such an amazing. Who. I'll say it has been knocking on our door for roughly 100 years.

[Unknown]

We don't know who she is.

[Sam Taggart]

She is this woman who has been.

[Unknown]

I think she works in entertainment technically, but everybody keeps telling me she never really has known. I think she maybe is a cinematographer or something. I don't really know much about her.

[Sam Taggart]

It's giving grip.

[Unknown]

She is the biggest. She is the biggest grip bitch in town. Please. Wow. And I just want to say, I know we're edging you by not actually saying her name. The fact that Sam is the one who wants to cut the intro short is huge. I'm the one that wants to cut the intro short. And Sam, you know, as conflict, diverse as he can be, is like, no, we're doing the intro.

[Sam Taggart]

That's true.

[Unknown]

So please welcome Darcy Card. What's Darcy? Is it.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, that's Darcy. I really thought. I was like, yeah, yeah, that's right. Darcy Carden, the biggest grip bitch in Hollywood.

[Unknown]

Now, right off the bat, I want to say, for a grip, your hair looks phenomenal.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, thanks.

[Unknown]

You did just. It literally was just done. Is that. Am I wrong?

[Darcy Carden]

No, I Mean, it just comes like this.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Like, you don't mean, like, from a salon?

[Unknown]

I do. I do. Oh, no, you do this yourself.

[Darcy Carden]

So good at my hair.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, really?

[Darcy Carden]

But I've been. And feel free to sound off in the comments, because I know they're thinking, don't let them. I feel like my hair is okay. You know, when you. You this. I think this is a classic thing that people do as they get older. This was, like, good hair 10 years ago. And now I'm like, is this even the style anymore? I know it's not.

[Unknown]

Well, here's what I do.

[Darcy Carden]

You know what I mean?

[Sam Taggart]

I know exactly what you mean.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. Where you're like, oh, this looks good. Great. I did it again. And then I walk up the road.

[Sam Taggart]

And I'm like, I know exactly what you mean to me.

[Unknown]

Please do not take this as a negative, because it is a positive. Julio has a bit about how all the women in Marvel movies have beach waves to, like, soften the blow of the fact that they're spreading American imperialism. But again, I don't mean that as an insult. It's like. Yeah, that's why they're beautiful.

[Darcy Carden]

Right? Right.

[Unknown]

As are you.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, you're so sweet. Well, I do. I, like, love a. I love a. This is, like, what I feel like works for my head.

[Unknown]

Yeah, but what are you gonna do, have, like, an undercut?

[Darcy Carden]

I mean, you see, like, there's just dirty.

[Unknown]

There's cool pigtails.

[Sam Taggart]

I think it's time for the octopus cut.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

What's the octopus cut?

[Sam Taggart]

You know what Gaga has? What Miley has? What Patty has.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

Oh, that. I've never heard of it as the.

[Sam Taggart]

Bangs, then the other bangs, then longer the bangs.

[Unknown]

Oh, you know our friend. Yeah, the chops.

[Sam Taggart]

The chops.

[Darcy Carden]

The straight chop.

[Sam Taggart]

Straight chops. And then the long.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Peyton Dix just cut her hair like that.

[Sam Taggart]

Really?

[Unknown]

And I was like, oh, yeah, it looks good. I was like, you look like a celebrity.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, it's very celeb.

[Sam Taggart]

It's very celeb. Because it's hard.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. It. Speaking of Heim, I remember Esti did it a couple years ago. I mean, people have been doing it.

[Sam Taggart]

People have been doing it all of.

[Darcy Carden]

A sudden, like at the Grammys especially, everyone has everybody.

[Unknown]

If it's the Grammys, you gotta do it.

[Darcy Carden]

If it's the Grammys and you're not.

[Unknown]

Whether you're at Heim or Selena or Selena Gomez, as Zoe Saldana says it is, you have to do it. What is it called again? Octopus.

[Sam Taggart]

The octopus.

[Unknown]

Guy.

[Darcy Carden]

I cannot believe I didn' I didn't know that either.

[Unknown]

Oh, wow.

[Darcy Carden]

Now you're. Now you're sitting here thinking.

[Unknown]

Did you make that up?

[Sam Taggart]

I did not get a question.

[Unknown]

What about it is octopus?

[Sam Taggart]

It's tentacles.

[Darcy Carden]

Barely, Jordan.

[Unknown]

Barely. That is not an octopus, guys.

[Sam Taggart]

That's tentacles.

[Darcy Carden]

That's tentacles.

[Sam Taggart]

When I look at that head, I see an octopus sitting on a head.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

Because it's tentacles.

[Darcy Carden]

I see like, I see like a stair.

[Sam Taggart]

Ooh.

[Darcy Carden]

It should be called the stair to me.

[Unknown]

It's helmet.

[Darcy Carden]

Helmet. It's.

[Unknown]

Yeah, it's Helmet head.

[Darcy Carden]

It's played by Helmet head.

[Sam Taggart]

Is the bowl cut, though?

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Helmet username. Helmet bangs.

[Darcy Carden]

Helmet bangs.

[Unknown]

Helmet bangs.

[Darcy Carden]

Wait, okay, so do you have to have bangs? You don't. It could be.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I don't think you have to have this.

[Darcy Carden]

It could be bangs. And then second layer. It should be called like the three layer strap.

[Unknown]

The three strap. Go on, go on.

[Darcy Carden]

Three strep throat. And just make it make sense for you.

[Unknown]

Can I tell you something? Now that we're naming things, recently I found out a close friend of ours.

[Darcy Carden]

I can't wait to hear off camera.

[Sam Taggart]

I want to know who it is.

[Unknown]

Can you say that name right now? Yeah. Well, Dash Turner, a close friend of ours, revealed to me a close friend of ours who, by the way, is like, I consider him very successful. He's written on some great shows. He like, he's sort of bi. Coastal diva.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Oof.

[Sam Taggart]

Very bravely bicoastal.

[Unknown]

He literally revealed to me just out of nowhere that this entire time he has held a sometimes full time, sometimes part time job at the New York Times as a naming specialist, where he literally, like, names games or like, does work with their podcast team.

[Darcy Carden]

Cool.

[Unknown]

And I'm like, that is things. So this. Don't you think that is the most rom com slash Sex and city boyfriend job? So he names. It's like being a cartoon editor at the New Yorker.

[Sam Taggart]

It's also like being like a chocolatier.

[Unknown]

It's like he's Juliet Binoche in chocolat.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, totally. It's also like the rom com girl would say it and then nobody would really question it.

[Unknown]

Totally. But it's also like he's a naming specialist, but he doesn't want to put a label on things.

[Darcy Carden]

Hot calling kettle something.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, even like, I would. And then when you do finally marry, like the sequel, when you're married to the naming specialist, and it's like really tense because, like, they can't think of the name for this thing. And they're, like, locked in the room, and you're taking care of the children, and you're like, well, he's in there naming. Meanwhile, I have to fucking bring the kid to school. And. And obviously, it's not as good as the first one, but it's kind of real.

[Unknown]

When he finally does think of the name, it's inspired by the woman's name or, like, by the woman. It's like, Darcy Productions. Like, he's like, darcy.

[Darcy Carden]

And then she's kind of like, yeah, it's all worth it.

[Sam Taggart]

It's all worth it.

[Darcy Carden]

It's been worth it. I married a good one. I can't wait to hear your. This is bumping back a minute, but I cannot wait to hear your Hollywood Handbook.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God, I cannot wait. It's funny. Go ahead.

[Sam Taggart]

I don't feel like my performance was amazing, but it's hard, I have to say.

[Darcy Carden]

It's hard to be amazing on that show. It's so disorienting.

[Sam Taggart]

It's so disorienting.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And I was also like, I think they're so funny. And I was sort of, like, trying to figure out, like, I was like, do I be combative? Do I be agreeing? Do I.

[Darcy Carden]

One of my favorite things listening to that podcast is when you can tell the person is like, what are we doing here? What do you want from this? Like, yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

I asked my friend who's a religious listener, and she was like, you have to be yourself and not try to do them at them because you seem like a loser if you try to, like, do exactly what they're doing because they're going to be better at it.

[Darcy Carden]

And then they'll. Then they'll, like, cut you off at the knees and you'll be. So.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

It's humiliating when they get you.

[Sam Taggart]

I also want to say about my performance, and even I want to.

[Unknown]

He was.

[Darcy Carden]

Of course.

[Sam Taggart]

You guys.

[Darcy Carden]

You're like their third brother.

[Sam Taggart]

I need to talk about my performance.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

And this is actually something that I've been thinking about, because this is Actors.

[Unknown]

On Actors, but for our podcast on Hollywood Handbooks, and you're the moderator, and you haven't seen it or heard it.

[Darcy Carden]

I get it, though. I know it.

[Sam Taggart]

So we also recorded here two days ago.

[Unknown]

Yes, that's right.

[Sam Taggart]

So we've been doing a lot of podcasting, and normally, as you know, when we do our podcast, we sit around a desk.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And I'm actually realizing that we're sitting on sort of a set both here and At Hollywood Handbook. And I'm feeling like when Gaga and A Star Is Born went into the studio and, like, couldn't find it. Like, she was like, it doesn't sound the same. It doesn't sound the same. And then Bradley Cooper's like, get a piano in here. And then they shut out his desk for you. Piano's desk.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, it's like a comforter. It's just like. It's what, you know, it's what.

[Sam Taggart]

I know.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. I was. I was telling them as I came in that I'm. I was wearing kind of dumb socks, but had the thought, it doesn't matter because we're going to be sitting behind a goddamn table. Lo and behold.

[Unknown]

No, it's a new.

[Sam Taggart]

And don't be wrong. This is much better. But I'm finding my performance more confused.

[Darcy Carden]

Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.

[Unknown]

Okay, so for anyone not watching, it's like, usually we're around a conversation and now we are in conversation. Couch and armchair.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

So here's. I have a theory about this.

[Sam Taggart]

Please.

[Unknown]

You know how, like, the definition of uncanny valley is like, just close enough to the real thing, but slightly farther in a way that makes it almost worse.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

So I think the fact that a set like this is almost living room, but not quite living room makes it more confusing than if you're just around a completely artificial desk in a conference room.

[Darcy Carden]

You're right.

[Unknown]

And so I'm like. I'm like, should I sort of like, kick off my shoes and take my phone out like, as I would in the living room?

[Darcy Carden]

I'm like, hiding my water, like. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean.

[Unknown]

Oh, you have one of those trad wife cuts.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow. How long have you been sporting this?

[Darcy Carden]

So long that. Look, it. It's not even. It's not.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, it doesn't sit straight.

[Darcy Carden]

It's not even level. I've been sporting this. So is this trad wife?

[Unknown]

Well, I don't know. Someone said that to me once and.

[Darcy Carden]

I sort of said the one with the big handle.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, the Stanley's more trad wife. But this is close.

[Unknown]

Well, the built in str pot freaks me out.

[Darcy Carden]

Why?

[Sam Taggart]

Well, mold, of course.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, I never thought about that.

[Unknown]

Just kidding.

[Darcy Carden]

I wash it all the time.

[Unknown]

But also. Sorry. Like, you should be able to angle a straw to get the last of the liquid.

[Darcy Carden]

You kind of can. I can get every last drop of this. I mean, listen. Corner.

[Unknown]

Oh, you can. Oh, you're right. You're right.

[Darcy Carden]

Corner. Wow, what I found.

[Unknown]

Got my ass.

[Darcy Carden]

I did.

[Sam Taggart]

See, that's an Understanding of the media.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. What I found years ago.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

I've been. I've been a. I've been on this for a while. Is the straw helps me drink so much more water.

[George Severus]

Really?

[Darcy Carden]

I hate this. I hate this. You hate tilting? I hate tilting. I don't know what's up with my neck or throat or mouth, but I hurt myself drinking a lot.

[Sam Taggart]

Really? Wow.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm not kidding. I think.

[Sam Taggart]

How bad?

[Darcy Carden]

Not so bad. Like just kind of like, like a. Like if I'm. Well, for one. I don't. I don't know. I don't know. You only have the mouth you have, so I don't know.

[Unknown]

And the neck you have especially.

[Darcy Carden]

Thank you. And the throat you have.

[Unknown]

And the throat.

[Sam Taggart]

Needless to say.

[Darcy Carden]

And. And so I don't know what it's like for other people, but I think I have a hard time doing big swallows.

[Unknown]

This is great. I really like this because it's very celebrity to have a super specific and kind of non believable like injury prone ailment.

[Sam Taggart]

Imagine like the moment you're an actress on set and you like tilt back and you know, this is the weird thing.

[Darcy Carden]

It's not even like I'm pulling my neck. It's like inside my swallowing mechanism.

[Unknown]

Interesting.

[Darcy Carden]

If I'm like listening, if I'm tilting this way and I drink, I'm like, oh, oh, my poor little esophagus. What? Swallows.

[Sam Taggart]

Sure. I think esophagus.

[Darcy Carden]

Anyway, what I found is if I'm just sitting here looking at you glug, glug, glug, glug, glug, I can drink all day.

[Sam Taggart]

That's amazing.

[Darcy Carden]

Something happens, something. I don't want to do this.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay. Here's the other thing. This I can. It can be a constant swallow. This is one gulp, one goal.

[Unknown]

That's very true.

[Darcy Carden]

That's very true. Thank you.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, but you can hold it up.

[Unknown]

And this is actually.

[Darcy Carden]

No, I can't. That's what I'm saying.

[Unknown]

This is also why. Wow. This is your. So this is why when I get an iced coffee, I finish it in like two seconds when I get a drip coffee.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I wish I had a straw.

[Darcy Carden]

Do you?

[Unknown]

Oh, you don't have a straw.

[Sam Taggart]

I don't have a straw.

[Darcy Carden]

With an ice. Yeah, I guess I always wish I had a straw.

[Unknown]

Sam is doing sippy cup iced coffee right now again for anyone just doing audio only.

[Sam Taggart]

And I've actually recently been going out of my way to get a straw for my coffees because I hate. I Hate when the ice touches my mouth.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

I go, ow.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, that's your injury, little actress. Oh, ouchie. Yeah. Anyway, I'm. I, I. I used to be a. On the set of the Good Place. My one, My. My. My favorite two costume people, they called me Contigo girl because I had a Contigo girl. Contigo girl.

[Sam Taggart]

Contigo.

[Unknown]

I guess I thought.

[Sam Taggart]

I thought Contigo girl. Oh, here comes Contigo Girl.

[Darcy Carden]

That's great. But I guess I have a slm. A slim or something now. But I used to have a Contigo Contigo. And I. And. Which is just a brand of.

[Unknown]

I think that's what I have. But did yours have a straw?

[Darcy Carden]

No, it had a straw, but also it was plastic. And then, you know, the whole thing.

[Unknown]

Well, of course.

[Darcy Carden]

And then all of a sudden, I'm like, I'm drinking out of this thing every. I'm. I don't know. I don't understand. Microplastic. But I know it's happening.

[Sam Taggart]

I do not understand.

[Darcy Carden]

And I don't want to, but I know it's happening. So then I was like, you got to go. You got to go Metal. Anyway, so now I'm. I mean, but I'm sure Cunty Go.

[Unknown]

Girls are really kidding me.

[Darcy Carden]

Cunty Go Girl.

[Unknown]

They call me. They call me Cunty, and I'm not gonna explain. On the set of the Good Place.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, yes, yes. Everybody called me. I made everybody call me Cunty Go girl.

[Sam Taggart]

I will say at work, I have. We all. They gave us all Stanley Cups, which is like, you know, you forget because everyone has one. You're sipping out of your Stanley Cup. But then sometimes a photo will leak from work, and someone will be like, you have a Stanley Cup?

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And I'm like, well, not in life.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, exactly, exactly.

[Unknown]

I'm sorry. By leak, do you mean someone posts a photo from the writers room, or do you mean there's paparazzi in the after midnight room?

[Sam Taggart]

You have no idea how much paparazzi is trying to figure out what Little Pun will be coming out tonight.

[Darcy Carden]

And how. How do they write it? How do they do it? What are they doing back there?

[Sam Taggart]

George, you don't live in Hollywood. It's actually a really intense industry.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Things are being leaked left and right.

[Unknown]

You guys are doing a Hollywood handbook to me. Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

Take back the night.

[Sam Taggart]

I'm trying to take back the night, honestly.

[Unknown]

Wow.

[Sam Taggart]

Because my performance was middling.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God. And now for this performance.

[Darcy Carden]

No, no, no. That is a show where, like, The. The meanest I ever thought I was by accident. Got the best reaction.

[Unknown]

Totally. Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Like, I kind of shitty. That was like. God, they loved it.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

I almost want to go back. I. I'm like, I want to redo. Like, I want to be mean this time.

[Unknown]

We're gonna go.

[Sam Taggart]

We'll go back.

[Unknown]

They're gonna have us back.

[Darcy Carden]

Hey, hon.

[Unknown]

We're the best guest they've ever had.

[Darcy Carden]

You're gonna go back. Trust me when I say you're gonna go back.

[Sam Taggart]

You guys, we gotta go back in one year.

[Unknown]

And also we're gonna have them on and we're gonna bully them until they cry.

[Darcy Carden]

Great.

[Unknown]

I would love to have them on.

[Darcy Carden]

I would.

[Unknown]

Like when we had. Well, so do you know how long gone.

[Darcy Carden]

Say it again.

[Unknown]

How long gone?

[Sam Taggart]

Contigo girl.

[Darcy Carden]

Great.

[Unknown]

It's Chris Black and Jason Stewart. It's a very popular sort of like.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, I know it.

[Sam Taggart]

Straight Guy podcast.

[Unknown]

Straight Guy podcast C. They'll have like, you know, everyone from, you know, Kurt Vonnegut to SD Heim, the ghost of Kurt Von. But they would. If anyone.

[Sam Taggart]

Octopus cuts walking through the door.

[Unknown]

If anyone could get the ghost of Kurt Vonnegut, it would be that.

[Sam Taggart]

Of course.

[Unknown]

But we had them on and we feel like they domed us. But now. Now we know them better. Yeah, but now we know them better and I think we need to have them back on again and really dumb them.

[Sam Taggart]

I love how inside the actor studio this is.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, because inside the podcast, when we.

[Sam Taggart]

Had them on, I had never listened to their podcast, which was.

[Unknown]

But now you're obsessed.

[Sam Taggart]

And now I'm obsessed.

[Darcy Carden]

But that's kind of dummy of you to not have listened to their.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, I know.

[Darcy Carden]

But still, you let them dom your ass.

[Sam Taggart]

I let them know we've started preparing.

[Unknown]

The truth is, we started preparing more.

[Sam Taggart]

We started preparing more.

[Unknown]

We're about to have someone on the road a novel, and we both read the novel covered a.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I'm not done yet.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

I have 100 pages left.

[Unknown]

That's nothing. You can do that.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Or in two days. Are you reading it or are you listening to it?

[Sam Taggart]

Reading.

[Unknown]

Yeah, And I read it too.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

Advanced copy. Girl, girl.

[Darcy Carden]

I think this has probably been talked to death. But where do you guys stand on calling? Listening to audiobooks, reading.

[Sam Taggart]

First of all, I want to say I love when the guest asks the question and prompts us. I count that as a form of doming and I celebrate it. Yeah, you got us big time.

[Darcy Carden]

I can't wait to keep domming.

[Sam Taggart]

And I think this. I'm actually very torn on this.

[Darcy Carden]

George, what do you think?

[Unknown]

The thing is, I only do maybe like two audiobooks a year. I mostly read on paper, and I have no problem counting them. And they're usually like. It's usually sort of like Middle Brown nonfiction. I can't read an. I can't listen to a novel, and I definitely can't listen to like a complex, like, nonfiction book. That's like deep journalism. So it's like I listen to the Tina Brown, like Vanity Fair diaries, for example, or like. Or like something that's really self help adjacent.

[Darcy Carden]

I love listening to a memoir.

[Unknown]

Yes, that's a good one.

[Sam Taggart]

That's a good one.

[Unknown]

But, yeah, I count it. I put it in my little notes app of, like, the books I've read.

[Darcy Carden]

So I do too. And I'm. I'm. My sisters and my mom read so much more than I do, but they. Oh, I just. I just elon. I just elon. Oh, my God, not now.

[Sam Taggart]

Not with everything going on.

[Darcy Carden]

But. But I. Anyway, I. My sister recently said, I guess this is what it is. I think you should totally count them on your list. But do you say, I was reading?

[Unknown]

Oh, no, no. You say I was listening.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, I think you say I was listening.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

You can say I did consume that piece of media.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. I consumed that.

[Unknown]

Now here's the other question. Does listening to podcast count or as a reading? I would say yes.

[Darcy Carden]

Well, of course, the cute thing is that my mom always does is because I read so much less than my. My very, very reader siblings. My mom is always like, but, honey, you're always reading scripts. She's always giving me that. That's true.

[Sam Taggart]

She's not.

[Darcy Carden]

It's really cute because I kind of played dumb in my fam.

[Unknown]

Sure, sure.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, you got to play a role.

[Darcy Carden]

I gotta play something.

[Unknown]

Everyone has their own places. We're doing last looks.

[Darcy Carden]

I really appreciate that. She gives that to me.

[Sam Taggart]

That is nice.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. You can read, doll, and I can't.

[Unknown]

You're like Goo Goo Gaga.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, I'm a little Goo Goo Gaga. I'm a little Goo Goo Gaga.

[Unknown]

You're a little cunty.

[Darcy Carden]

Go girl. I'm a little bit of a girl.

[Unknown]

I'm Tegugoo Gaga, girl.

[Sam Taggart]

I'm ready to. What's the word? Confess something embarrassing.

[Darcy Carden]

I can't wait.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay. When I was like 23 or 24, I listened. I was a dog walker, so I was listening to a lot of things. And I listened to the audiobook of The Rules of Power. Because I was. Felt like I was being overlooked in the open mic comedy scene.

[Unknown]

Well.

[Sam Taggart]

And guess what?

[Unknown]

It worked. Look at you now.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, exactly.

[Unknown]

Paparazzi are following you into your job writing on a major late night television show.

[Sam Taggart]

Leaking My Stanley Cup.

[Darcy Carden]

So did you learn anything from it?

[Sam Taggart]

For sure, for sure.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

I actually did find it kind of helpful where I was like, oh, there are. Well. And it's like I think about it a lot. I confuse the rules of power with the rules of fashion sometimes, which. They're one and the same.

[Unknown]

They're one and the same. I didn't want to say it, but.

[Sam Taggart]

Like the first page of the Rules of Power, they're like, first of all, if you think you don't need to, you don't want to learn the rules of power. Well, you already are playing them. You're just losing.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I gotta be faster.

[Sam Taggart]

And I feel that way about clothes too, where people are like, no, it's so. I don't want to look like anything. It's like, no, you already are. You look like something.

[Darcy Carden]

Holy shit. I need to read both of these so bad.

[Unknown]

The fashion thing is really so true. It's like, because sometimes you convince you're about to leave the house and you convince yourself, oh, whatever, it doesn't matter better. Suddenly you find yourself. It's like you're alone in this like giant, like, empty world and you're like, oh, so this is just what I think I'm bringing to. To today.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, fuck. I need to read Rules of fashion hard. I'm really in my sweatshirt. Well, bad fitting pants era.

[Sam Taggart]

It's very la.

[Unknown]

It's very la la. It's like someone walks in to a professional setting and they're like in their pajamas with fluffy slippers, like slips. Bunny robe, hair in a net. And they're like, hi, where can I. Where can I put my pillow?

[Darcy Carden]

Totally.

[Sam Taggart]

But that is like in la. That is a power. That's how you show power.

[Unknown]

No, that's rule of power number one. Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Here's rule of power. I'm about to. Okay, my. I'm. My house did not burn down, but thank you. But we are displaced.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, dang.

[Darcy Carden]

For a while. So displaced is such a weird word. But that's what we are. But that's what we are. So I'm accepting it. So I have. Have my. My. I have like a suitcase full of clothes.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

And so there's this weird thing where I'm. Where I'm like, this is my. My, this is all I got. Like. Like, for I don't know how long. I'm also deciding. I'm like, I'm not buying anything new.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Like, I'm really living in this. These are the, like, three pairs of pants you brought and the three sweatshirts and T shirts. And. And. And in my brain is like, this is fine because this is the situation you're in. But then I went to, like, a. A not fancy meeting yesterday, but I should look nice. And I had, like, options, but I was like, but I'm displaced. And I'm like, they don't know that.

[Unknown]

They don't know. Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm in a weird. I'm in a weird this is liminal.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

Context is so important.

[Sam Taggart]

Context is so contigo, girl.

[Unknown]

Contigo is so important. I need. I. I actually sort of want to develop my theory about context creators a little more.

[Darcy Carden]

Go, go.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay. When did you talk about this again?

[Unknown]

At our Sketch Fest live show.

[Darcy Carden]

That's it.

[Unknown]

And no one liked it.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

No, they did, but they did look good.

[Sam Taggart]

We had a context diva in the audience.

[Unknown]

I think what happened was it was so smart. It was very intense that it wasn't funny. People were just, like, listening and taking notes, but I wasn't getting laughs.

[Darcy Carden]

You're so smart.

[Unknown]

Oh, shut up, Contigo diva.

[Darcy Carden]

But I do love just kind of being Goo Gaga and listening to this podcast and, like, learning stuff.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God.

[Darcy Carden]

And then guess what? You're smart, too, Sam.

[Sam Taggart]

Thank you.

[Darcy Carden]

You know, George is, like, the smart one.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God.

[Darcy Carden]

But, Sam, guess what? You're really smart, too.

[Unknown]

Thank you.

[Sam Taggart]

I really appreciate that.

[Darcy Carden]

You know that, right?

[Unknown]

Of course. Just different flavors and moving on from this.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, sorry, sorry. Sor.

[Sam Taggart]

Back to context.

[Unknown]

Okay. So my sort of, like, idea that I came up with on the spot is, like, you know, we call them content creators, People that are on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, but actually they are context creators. They are not creating new content. They're just saying something about, like, a red carpet look that someone wore, but putting it into new context. So what we actually need is new content. The. The, like, creator economy is just keeping us stuck. Because all of it is about nostalgia and about, like, repackaging existing things and putting them right. Yes. And putting them into new context.

[Sam Taggart]

And actually, I think there's a new phrase that is speaking to this you are familiar with. Of course. She reheated her nachos.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. Yes.

[Unknown]

They are nacho creators. They're nacho reheaters.

[Sam Taggart]

I think people are really becoming wise to the way that everything is just being reused and recycled in a way that's almost toxic. But it is just a given that when you put something out, you're not. Not making new nachos. You're reheating someone nachos.

[Unknown]

And I want to say one thing. It's like the context creator ethos started out good because it started out as being like, remember this rom com from 2002? It was sexist because of XYZ reason. And now suddenly, it's in a new context, and it's a context that is helpful. It's being like, wow, look at all the unconscious biases we had then that we now see whatever. But then it's. Now it's taken to, like, such an extreme that it's like, not everything is sort of like. Like, a prompt for you to theorize. I mean, it's funny that I. We are the one saying that, which is like, kind of our whole thing.

[Darcy Carden]

Delete, delete, delete.

[Unknown]

But. But you know what I mean. I'm like, time to create new things. I no longer need new interpretations of Bridget Jones's Diary.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. I know. Wait, do you mean. Do you mean. Do you mean you don't need a new movie or you don't.

[Unknown]

No, I need a new movie.

[Darcy Carden]

No, I actually need a movie in.

[Unknown]

Theaters and not on streaming.

[Darcy Carden]

I had a. I had a. I had a. I had a sad moment this morning when I saw that it was streaming on.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

God love you, peacock. Like, there's a new Bridget Jones movie that I've heard is good, starring Renee Zellweger. Did I say her name?

[Sam Taggart]

No, that's not a normal.

[Darcy Carden]

I mean, it didn't.

[Unknown]

Can I tell you something? When you said Renee Zellweger, I had this deep feeling that I know her. I felt the need to speak it up and be like, oh, Renee. Like, and as though I had some connection. And I wanted to be like. We were out for coffee the other day, and she said the funniest thing, and I don't know what it is. There's maybe a past that I have a past life, you know?

[Darcy Carden]

You've known her your whole entire life.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Maybe that's what it is.

[Darcy Carden]

You've known her whole entire life.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

I just rewatched Down With Love, and maybe that was fresh in my mind, and so it was almost like I just had coffee with her.

[Darcy Carden]

I love that movie.

[Unknown]

It is one of the best movies.

[Darcy Carden]

It was underrated.

[Unknown]

Completely.

[Darcy Carden]

Nobody knows it.

[Unknown]

That is a great movie. That I'm glad people have put into new context as, like, a movie that was, you know, sort of much better than it was given credit for and ahead of its time and all this stuff.

[Darcy Carden]

Ewan McGregor.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

I want to say Rachel Dratch.

[Unknown]

Yes. Rachel Dratch. Sarah Paulson. Oh, my God.

[Darcy Carden]

No, it's okay.

[Unknown]

Renee's from Frasier.

[Darcy Carden]

Niles Crane.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

David.

[Unknown]

David Hyde. I cannot believe I tempted literal gay icon for sure. Sorry, I. I.

[Sam Taggart]

Did you though, guys.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, yeah, yeah. That's okay.

[Unknown]

You were about to say something about Renee Zelba.

[Darcy Carden]

Only Bridget Jones. Only that. It's not like. It's not a prequel. It's not, like, starring CW Talents or whatever. It's like, with them. It's with them.

[Unknown]

Yeah, it's with them.

[Darcy Carden]

Hugh Grant's probably in it.

[Unknown]

I think he is, actually.

[Darcy Carden]

What are we doing here?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

It's not in the movie theater. Put a gun to my head.

[Unknown]

No. Kill me.

[Darcy Carden]

Pull the trigger, and don't miss.

[Sam Taggart]

Cunty gone girl.

[Unknown]

Cunty gone girl.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, okay.

[Unknown]

I'm literally call Hollywood Handbook. FaceTiming Hollywood Handbook right now. Say cunty gone girl again. Watch this. Watch this haze. Wait, can we just, like, truly breeze through our first segment so we can go back to gabbing?

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, great. I love gabbing.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, my gosh. Okay.

[Darcy Carden]

Thanks for having me.

[Sam Taggart]

Thanks for doing this.

[Unknown]

I'm literally on cloud nine. I might as well be on a mountain of cloud cocaine.

[Sam Taggart]

I also want to say, you know, to your incredible credit, you've been in Hollywood for, you know, you. You know the biz, and you. We said, you know, we can do zoom any of these times, and you said, no, I'm gonna wait until we're in person.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And I think it's 100% worth it, and I'm so glad you did.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, good. I really do. I really. I think the proof is in the pud one.

[Sam Taggart]

This is being in person as your Bradley Cooper bringing the piano.

[Darcy Carden]

Exactly it.

[Unknown]

At AMA Insurance, we know it's more.

[George Severus]

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[Sam Taggart]

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[George Severus]

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[Unknown]

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[George Severus]

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[Unknown]

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[George Severus]

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[Unknown]

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[George Severus]

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[Unknown]

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[George Severus]

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[Unknown]

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[Unknown]

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[Sam Taggart]

Our first segment is called Straight Shooters and in the second we ask you a series of rapid fire questions. It's basically this thing or this other thing and the only rule is you can't ask any follow up questions or we'll scream, scream, scream.

[Darcy Carden]

I want to ask follow up questions but I won't.

[Unknown]

George, kick us off Elevated Horror or Dora the Explorer.

[Darcy Carden]

Ooh, Dora the Explorer.

[Sam Taggart]

Teenage Dream or Wilhelm Scream Teenage Dream.

[Unknown]

The Taming of the shrew or defaming Mr. Magoo?

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, taming of the Shrew.

[Sam Taggart]

Kendrick Lamar or that bitch Jafar.

[Unknown]

Kendrick Lamar, Your wish is my command. Or he went to Tish and now he's in a band.

[Darcy Carden]

He went to Tish and now he's in a van.

[Sam Taggart]

A fleet of Welsh corgis. Or the feet of Florence Welch.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, whoa. The feet of Florence Welch.

[Unknown]

Wow. This girl is on fire. That boy is mine. Or these boots are made for walking.

[Darcy Carden]

These boots are made for walking.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay. Plastic straws or. Laughs and guffaws.

[Darcy Carden]

Laughs and guffaws. Wow. Wow.

[Sam Taggart]

Amazing.

[Unknown]

Oh, my. I'll say it.

[Sam Taggart]

A thousand.

[Unknown]

A thousand doves.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay. Thank you for the doves. Did you give me three options?

[Unknown]

Yeah, I do that sometimes.

[Darcy Carden]

That made my head spin.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Also, did you. You say Jafar, and then you said, your wish is my command.

[Unknown]

Sometimes that does happen, though.

[Darcy Carden]

But you don't.

[Sam Taggart]

We don't collab.

[Unknown]

No, we don't collab. But there have been, I would say, like, four or five times when it's, like, eily, similar stuff.

[Darcy Carden]

Same brain, similar context.

[Unknown]

Similar. Yes, very much so. Similar context, same brain. And I also, I hate to say it, similar sort of like, algorithmically suggested content that we're consuming. Of course, of course. Of course.

[Darcy Carden]

Of course. That was great. Okay, so I got a thousand dubs. Yeah. Okay. Great.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Wow. Thank you.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, it was. You know, you're a performer, and there was so much nuance there. There was ups and downs, highs and lows. It was an amazing, amazing performance.

[Darcy Carden]

Like, having heard this segment so many times, only recently did I realize it's. You're not actually. I don't think you're actually trying to get the person to say one thing or the other. No, it really is. Is.

[Sam Taggart]

It's like, the segment is impressionist.

[Darcy Carden]

The segment is the ultimate diamond thing.

[Unknown]

It really is Us microdosing Hollywood hand. Like, we're. We're being like, isn't it funny that we thought of these two things that rhyme?

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, yes.

[Unknown]

And then it's like, now say something and we won't laugh.

[Darcy Carden]

Exactly, Exactly. I think I used to think it was like, which thing is straighter? And then I was like, no, no, no. It's which thing is gayer? And only recently was like, no, no, it's neither. It's neither.

[Unknown]

In theory, it is like. Like, it's almost like a Rorschach test of, like, what you're drawn to says something about your personality, and then all of that adds up to your score. But it's also about the performance. Like, I enjoyed that. When I gave you three, you were like, My mind temporarily taken aback.

[Darcy Carden]

And then I think I could have lost points for. Honestly on that one. I was so overwhelmed, I just went with the last thing I heard.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

And you know that.

[Sam Taggart]

You know what? $990.

[Darcy Carden]

I think that's fine. I think that's fine.

[Sam Taggart]

That was so good. Student. That was so good. Student. Be like, you told me I got this right, but I actually, I was a little. If you look at the word. If you look at the word, it wasn't. I got to the right answer, but I did it wrong.

[Darcy Carden]

I did. That reminds me of something I did when I was in. Let's say, I think I was, like, nine. My older cousin played Too Short for me and my sister. Too Short the rapper.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Darcy Carden]

We were. We. My sister and I listened. We. We grew up in the Bay Area. We listened to a lot of hip hop, but we knew that we weren't allowed to listen to Too Short. Okay. Because he was really nasty.

[Unknown]

Sure. Wow. That's where the line was drawn. Okay.

[Darcy Carden]

And we were listening to Too Short in my cousin's bedroom, and my parents walked in and he was saying, like, fuck, pussy, ho, whatever. Like, he was saying horrible shit.

[Unknown]

I love that.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, I know. I love that song too. And, you know, we, like, ran to turn it off. And my. My. My parents were like. They were mad. They were disappointed.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

And later, like, later that day, when we were talking about it, I was like, I'm really glad that you did that. We talked about it. We were really glad that you did that because it really taught us a lesson. My mom was, like, off. No, you didn't.

[Unknown]

She was like, a loser.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. She was like, you don't have to do that. And it was such a.

[Sam Taggart]

Like, that is so wholesome.

[Darcy Carden]

Isn't that so check your work.

[Sam Taggart]

Like, like, yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

What is that? What is that? That's people pleaser.

[Unknown]

That's. We both have.

[Sam Taggart]

We have some of them. I wonder. I've always wondered why, like, I wonder if it's like, do I just have that or did I, like, watch the right mixture of, like, kids, TV shows?

[Darcy Carden]

Totally, totally, totally. Yeah. It is that little moment where, like, the music changes and you're like, hey, mom, can I talk to you for a second? It actually really. It was good that you did that. And even though it was hard, we learned a lesson. She was like, shut up.

[Sam Taggart]

When you were a kid, did you, like, often think, like, you're in a movie?

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, yeah, yeah, totally. Did you?

[Unknown]

Yeah, Yeah, I remember, like, in what sense?

[Sam Taggart]

Like, I would, like, look out the window, Moody.

[Unknown]

Look out the window. Of course.

[Darcy Carden]

I think when you say when you were a kid, you mean to this day?

[Unknown]

Yeah, no, I.

[Sam Taggart]

Well now, now I understand it and I can be like, oh, this feels cinematic or something. But like as a kid I was like, I wish someone was filming right now. Like, this is a real emotion. And I remember even like writing down once, like I took guitar lessons when I was like 8 or something. And I was like so nervous because. Whatever, whatever. So I wrote down like a piece of paper, like I'm scared to take guitar lessons, and like folded it up and put it somewhere. And then my mom found it and was like, wow, that was so sweet. And I'm like, I knew what I was doing. Like it wasn't like.

[Unknown]

Like you literally put it like on her desk. Yes. You were like, don't read that.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, totally.

[Sam Taggart]

I was doing it like I'm in a movie.

[Unknown]

Yeah, Yeah, I think I definitely. Window Rain on Window was obviously big when I was younger. For whatever reason the last few years, Walking on the street is much bigger for me. And maybe this is LA versus New York thing, but Walking on the street. And I would say it reached its peak during Charlie xcx like three Party Girl.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Cuz it was just. You can't. If you listen to that song and you're walking, you're going to stop.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, Von Dutch specifically.

[Unknown]

Sorry, that's the one I'm v. If.

[Sam Taggart]

You are walking at all, it's. It's over for all the ants in your area. They're getting smushed.

[Darcy Carden]

And the uncles.

[Unknown]

Just kidding.

[Darcy Carden]

I don't know. I don't. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

I went through a phase where I would listen to that Selena Gomez song that's like, good for you. Do you know that one?

[Darcy Carden]

Like in it. Great Hacks scene right where like. Does that sound familiar? Where they're like like Poppy and. And Hannah.

[Sam Taggart]

I'm like, don't quiz me, don't quiz me.

[Darcy Carden]

I feel like there's a great moment in Hacks where they're blasting that in a sort of like.

[Unknown]

It's like one of the sexiest songs ever produced.

[Darcy Carden]

Maybe it's not that song.

[Unknown]

And there was a. I was probably in my mid-20s and I was living in Boston and I would come back from like a party or something and be like a little drunk and I would literally put it on and basically like writhe around section on my own and by myself. Like not even in a way where.

[Darcy Carden]

I was just kind of.

[Unknown]

It wasn' sex. I Wasn't masturbating. I wasn't masturbating. I was literally just like.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, you were just kind of feeling your body.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Oh, wow. That. My esophagus felt bad.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, no, no, I think it's good.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Damn. I'm gonna have to only drink through a strong.

[Darcy Carden]

That's how it happens, girl. Getting Redigo, girl. Anyway, I'm, like, backtracking on that.

[Unknown]

Good for you. Good for you.

[Darcy Carden]

The one. I love that song. I'm actually surprised. No Shade to Selena. How many Selena songs I love.

[Unknown]

So the thing is, she has amazing.

[Sam Taggart]

That's valid to say.

[Unknown]

She has amazing music. It's just. And you know what? I'll leave it at that.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, great.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Beautiful music.

[Unknown]

Beautiful music. Beautiful recorded music.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

When it's recorded and then it's released and then I press play on it, it sounds amazing.

[Sam Taggart]

Sounds amazing. When it comes to my ears.

[Unknown]

When it comes to my ears. Ears.

[Sam Taggart]

When I press this, I'm loving it.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

God, it's so difficult for me. So we can't go into this, but.

[Sam Taggart]

She'S watched amelia Perez over 400 times.

[Unknown]

I've watched Amelia Perez twice, and one of them was in theaters.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

And so all I want to talk about is Amelia Perez, but I can't because it's, like, no longer relevant. Like, I don't actually have a hot take on it, but for whatever reason, since I've been in la, I keep bringing up. Because it's, you know, you guys are. You know, it's like the Oscars are happening and we're in la, so obviously I want to talk about Emilia Perez.

[Sam Taggart]

And the billboards are everywhere.

[Unknown]

Billboards are everywhere. Where we literally passed one the other day when we were driving and Sam was like, oh, there's your girl about Carlos, Sofia Gascon, who I think is an incredible actress, regardless of her very contemptible political opinions. I think she really absolutely slated and was cunty Go girl in that entire film. So. But we can't get it. Okay, should we get it?

[Sam Taggart]

I think we should do the topic.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

Okay. Darcy, what is your topic that you've brought today and what is straight about it?

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, I've thought about this for so long. Wrong. This is. I feel like this is a hard question. It's getting harder every day.

[Sam Taggart]

That's true.

[Darcy Carden]

Does that make sense, what I mean?

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

It's getting harder every day as the trad wives are doing poppers.

[Sam Taggart]

That's true. That's true.

[Unknown]

Literally, the trad wives are doing poppers.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. Kind of.

[Unknown]

Yeah, kind of.

[Darcy Carden]

So, like, it's getting harder to kind of separate what is straight and what is gay.

[Unknown]

That's like one of the it. You know how there's this political realignment where the right and the left don't exist anymore. It's more about sort of like, are you random or are you kind of like, normal?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

That what you're describing, the sentence the trad wives are doing paupers is like a perfect encapsulation of how everything has been remixed where nothing makes sense in the world.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Right. So this question, I feel like, is harder today than it was a couple years ago.

[Unknown]

It's harder than it's ever been.

[Darcy Carden]

So my. So I was blessed by God himself.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[Darcy Carden]

I think he's a him.

[Unknown]

Oh, okay.

[Darcy Carden]

I was blessed by God himself to be doing this show on this particular day. Day, which is the Valentine. Yeah.

[Unknown]

I thought you were waiting for us to say it with you.

[Darcy Carden]

The actual holiday called Valentine's Day.

[Unknown]

Yes. So it is currently, as we're recording this, it is Valentine's Day.

[Darcy Carden]

February 14th.

[Sam Taggart]

February 14th.

[Darcy Carden]

Which I think is. Is like sort of the beginning of force fed straight culture.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

When you're a kid.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

It really is.

[Darcy Carden]

It's like. It's like real life life straight in your face. It's not like a movie where there's like a princess and a prince or whatever. It's like, write a love note to the boy over there. Yes. Now, who do you love? Girl. Which boy do you love? Boy. Which girl do you love? Ask them to be your wife. Do it in front of. Do it in front of the class.

[Unknown]

But also, it's like. It's a numbers game. Right. One to everyone. Do. Do you remember, like, how you would write Valentine's Day cards for every.

[Darcy Carden]

Everyone?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, well, they went to. Yeah. I feel like mine was like, gender neutral, roughly where you write them. It was just like, to everyone in the class, I get.

[Unknown]

Yeah, but would you actually write a Valentine's Day to another boy? A Valentine's Day?

[Darcy Carden]

I mean, a girl would, I think. No, but. But that's different. I mean, because would a boy.

[Unknown]

Girls are lesbians.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

Because it was like, you would get like boy cards. Like, they would almost be like, like.

[Darcy Carden]

Like a little baseball player. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And you'd be like, catch this ball.

[Darcy Carden]

Catch my ball. Catch my ball.

[Unknown]

Catch my ball.

[Darcy Carden]

Jeff, please, I beg you.

[Unknown]

Then Jeff has a sexual awakening.

[Darcy Carden]

Like, holy.

[Unknown]

I do want to catch your ball.

[Darcy Carden]

But, yeah, I just. I just. There. You know, there's the. The things in elementary School. This is the most like force fed a teacher. Makes you do it, your parents make you do it.

[Unknown]

All these people, by the way, who don't encourage over sexualization in other areas of your life. It's like, it's like they don't let you watch R rated movies. They. They don't quite tell you where babies come from. Like, they're not at all encouraging you to be a sexual being. But then this one day comes and it's like the purge, but for being like straight and sexual.

[Darcy Carden]

Straight and sexual. Every holiday is this though, and it's holiday.

[Unknown]

And then they like make their son do Valentine's and then he's like, wait, why? And they're like, what are you.

[Darcy Carden]

Exactly. Exactly. This is. It's like every holiday makes somebody do like, makes your parent do something like lie to you about Santa Claus or whatever it is. It's like these. It's like, well, that's just what God himself told us to do it.

[Unknown]

You can even like not be religion. Suddenly. Suddenly it's Christmas and they're like, thank God Christ was born.

[Darcy Carden]

Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. So. So anyway, I just, I. I don't know when. How do you guys feel about Valentine's Day as adults?

[Sam Taggart]

Right. This is where it gets complicated.

[Darcy Carden]

Sorry, I just D. You again.

[Sam Taggart]

No, no, no. Because I was about to ask you, but being dumb.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, but to.

[Unknown]

I do want, like, I like the idea that the thing for like for Christmas, the thing is religion for. What are the other holidays? April fools. Suddenly everyone's a trickster. Right?

[Darcy Carden]

Everybody loves America.

[Unknown]

Yes, exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

Or doesn't. But family.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Thanksgiving, Everyone is like, even if you, even if you hate your family, Thanksgiving comes and you're like, we're a family.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, I guess. Fourth July. Fourth of July. Everyone loves America, but also kind of Thanksgiving.

[Unknown]

Kind of Thanksgiving.

[Darcy Carden]

There's a little bit of like, it's.

[Sam Taggart]

Like, we did it.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

It's like, look how good.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay.

[Unknown]

And then. But Valentine's Day, the thing is everyone loves heterosexuality.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, totally.

[Sam Taggart]

I guess in theory, like, I met a state in my life where I'm like any holiday. I'm like, good. Like, I think the more time we have time to check in and be like, nice.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm the opposite. I like it better.

[Sam Taggart]

What's yours?

[Darcy Carden]

I'm like, don't tell me what to fucking do. I think that's it. I like, don't tell me when to kiss someone. Don't tell me when to like, love my family. I think that's where I'm like, I make my own rules, but it's kind of nicer. I like, this is better.

[Sam Taggart]

And maybe you're better at it. Maybe I'm, you know, the guy in the rom com who's the sequel and the naming. And I'm stuck in the room and I'm like, don't talk to me when I'm naming my things.

[Darcy Carden]

Right? No, you're not.

[Sam Taggart]

And so then on Valentine's Day, I'm like, what have I been doing?

[Darcy Carden]

Right.

[Sam Taggart]

I've been so obsessed with naming things, I forgot you're right here the whole time.

[Darcy Carden]

Right.

[Unknown]

Well, I do think there's a way in which hating Valentine's Day almost became equally straight. It became like this cliche of, like, people being like people that in no other context would even use the term capitalist, suddenly being like, it's a capitalist holiday that tries to sell us capitalist love. And you're like, okay, like, relax. You are just like a normal girl, right? Yes. Suddenly you're like Noam Chomsky. All of a sudden.

[Darcy Carden]

I feel like my mom may have said that, that sentence.

[Unknown]

Suddenly you're no Chomsky, maybe. No, but it is true that it's. It's almost, in a weird way, quote unquote, basic girl to hate Valentine's Day despite the fact that that same girl. And sorry to. You know, the only reason I'm saying girl is because boys are, like, too dumb to even have an opinion.

[Darcy Carden]

What day is it? Yeah.

[Unknown]

So it's like that same girl is definitely interested in having a beautiful wedding. Is definitely, like, interested in having a great boyfriend or husband. But then suddenly, on Valentine's Day, she's. L know. Wearing a sort of, like, a black. Like a black. Yeah, like she's wearing.

[Darcy Carden]

To protest capitalism, you have to, like, go through your. If you're just like a normal girl, you have to go through your, like, I hate Valentine phase.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Which is why I think I'm, like, interested in what Sam is saying about liking Valentine. It's like, well, maybe the straight thing is to have it have so much power over you that you're reactionary against it. And then the normal thing is to. To just let it wash over.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, it's sort of.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. And mostly it's like, if you're normal about anything, I think it's good.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

[Unknown]

That's how I feel about Christmas.

[Darcy Carden]

Don't hate it. Don't love it. Is that what you.

[Unknown]

No, I like it. And I don't associate it with anything actually substantial or rooted in reality. It's not about religion. It's not about family. It's not about anything. It's just like, have fun.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, yeah, have fun.

[Darcy Carden]

Totally. It's so much better to just feel that way.

[Sam Taggart]

And especially when like. Like when I think I would hate it if it was like, if I'm not getting a fucking present today, I'm gonna fucking scream if I'm not getting.

[Darcy Carden]

A fucking fuck today.

[Unknown]

If I'm not getting my once a year fuck today. Yeah, exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

I've been waiting all fucking year for.

[Darcy Carden]

My fuck for my one. And if I don't get it, I.

[Sam Taggart]

Need a fucking scream.

[Unknown]

That's the girl in the naming rom com. She's like, if I don't get my one fuck today. And by the way, it's called no Fucks Given. Oh, and the naming specialist thought of that title.

[Sam Taggart]

Yes, he did.

[Unknown]

That's how at the end, he thinks of the title of the movie he's in. It's kind of being Malovich. It's very off, actually.

[Sam Taggart]

Brilliant. Wow.

[Darcy Carden]

This is a good movie.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[Darcy Carden]

It's a good movie.

[Unknown]

And then the credits are at the end of the movie.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, okay. Actually, the name of the movie, as you go into the movie, is not. It gets renamed.

[Unknown]

Do you know what it is? It's insert name here. It's insert title here. That's what the movie is called. Because it's also a commentary on him being a name.

[Darcy Carden]

Exactly.

[Sam Taggart]

Unfortunately. I would love that.

[Darcy Carden]

I think it's great. Yeah. Who's this starring?

[Unknown]

Okay, okay. All right. Not Zoe Deutsch.

[Sam Taggart]

Let's start there. She's cut.

[Unknown]

I have to say, Darcy, I'm afraid to say names of celebrities with you because you have worked with so many of them.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, that's a good point.

[Unknown]

Have you worked with Zoe Deutsch? Okay, okay, so. And we have. I have nothing.

[Darcy Carden]

No, you're just saying. You're saying maybe, like, okay, Zoe.

[Unknown]

Okay, first of all, Zoe's lovely. Rule of culture number one.

[Darcy Carden]

Everybody knows this.

[Sam Taggart]

We. We love Zoe on this podcast.

[Unknown]

All right, so Zoe is. Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay. Yeah.

[Unknown]

So what actress slash actor could this be? I mean, you know what?

[Darcy Carden]

I. Yeah, Penn Badgley just popped into my mind.

[Unknown]

Penn Badgley as the naming specialist could.

[Darcy Carden]

Be really big use finishing up. He might need a new project.

[Sam Taggart]

I agree.

[Unknown]

All right.

[Sam Taggart]

And I actually do want Sydney Sweeney to, like, keep being rom comy, but get better at it.

[Darcy Carden]

I just kind of kicked George.

[Unknown]

You think you guys are kicking me? You're like, what the. Is he. Hello?

[Sam Taggart]

You guys are mad at Me for this.

[Darcy Carden]

No, no, no, no.

[Unknown]

I love Sydney Sweeney, but I. Unfortunately, as someone who has seen her rom com, that's not her strong stuff. That's true.

[Sam Taggart]

I haven't seen the rom com.

[Darcy Carden]

I haven't either, but maybe she, maybe she, you know, give her more reps.

[Sam Taggart]

I just want her to get some more reps. It's like me with Hollywood handbook. Just one more go.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. The old, the 90s Rom com girls got so many reps. Reps. You got so many reps you didn't get.

[Sam Taggart]

Every rom com actress says, get your reps in.

[Unknown]

Get your reps. Can I say someone who I think is one of the most brilliant comedic actresses of her generation that hasn't gotten her due?

[Darcy Carden]

I'm so excited. Excited.

[Unknown]

Jane from Happy Endings.

[Darcy Carden]

Jane from Happy Endings.

[Unknown]

Did you ever watch Happy Endings?

[Darcy Carden]

Wait, she's the one who, Alicia or. No, no. Eliza.

[Unknown]

Eliza.

[Sam Taggart]

Let me get a face.

[Darcy Carden]

So there's Eliza. I feel like there's two Elizas.

[Unknown]

That's. You're correct. Not the one that was in the Girl Next Door.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, so Eliza Coupe.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, yes. She is.

[Unknown]

She is one of the funniest women people alive.

[Darcy Carden]

She is so funny.

[Unknown]

I, I, she's, like, born to do television.

[Darcy Carden]

I agree.

[Unknown]

So I'm thinking it's her.

[Sam Taggart]

First of all, it's a film, so.

[Unknown]

It'S her, and I think her and Pen could work. And I also like that she's maybe a little older than him. That could. But that's not addressed because we're not. Because that would be condescending to the audience. Like, it's not about that.

[Darcy Carden]

It's not about.

[Unknown]

It's not, like, empowering that she's older.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

She's just a normal girl.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And he's a normal guy. That's annoying.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Green light. Okay. She is really.

[Unknown]

She's so funny.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

You, like, pretty much discovered her.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

You, like, put her on the map.

[Unknown]

I put her on the map.

[Darcy Carden]

Happy Endings. Alicia Cuthbert.

[Unknown]

Alicia Cuthbert is the other one.

[Darcy Carden]

She's also great.

[Unknown]

She's also great.

[Darcy Carden]

And she mentioned Casey Wilson, who we know and love.

[Unknown]

I mean, duh.

[Darcy Carden]

That's a dad.

[Unknown]

That's Casey Wilson, first of all, should be president.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

I'm not even. She doesn't have time to do this rom com because she literally has to be in the administration in the White House.

[Darcy Carden]

Speaking of going back to audiobooks, I would highly recommend her audiobook of she's. When they're doing their own audiobook Martin shorts.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, that's fun.

[Darcy Carden]

It's really fun to listen to them tell their own story.

[Sam Taggart]

That's.

[Unknown]

I just am filled with love. I'm literally filled with happiness that Casey Wilson is out there.

[Darcy Carden]

Me, too.

[Sam Taggart]

Me, too.

[Darcy Carden]

God, me too.

[Unknown]

Can you imagine the world if she wasn't?

[Darcy Carden]

You should have her on this pod. Have you met and loved.

[Unknown]

I have never met love.

[Darcy Carden]

Met the best.

[Unknown]

And one time I asked someone, I can't remember if it was like, I was like, oh, I would love to do it wasn't her. This is not her fault that I'm. That I haven't done it, but it was like, someone that either rep. That reps someone involved or whatever. I was like, oh, I would love to do bitch Sesh. And then the person's response was like, you know, to do that podcast, you really have to be up to date on the Bravo show. It was like, you can't just sort of go there and, like, be funny and.

[Darcy Carden]

Are you not?

[Unknown]

No.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, so they knew about you. Okay. That's such a funny thing to.

[Unknown]

And I was like, I get it. I get it. I would never disrespect Casey by going on it.

[Darcy Carden]

To be caught up with all of.

[Sam Taggart]

Them, it's a lot.

[Darcy Carden]

So much more.

[Sam Taggart]

It's a lot of reading.

[Unknown]

I know. But again, I was like, you know what? I respect it.

[Sam Taggart]

I actually would love for you to go on unprepared and have her fucking scream at you.

[Unknown]

I would love to. And it's like, secretly, she's been a huge.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, totally. It would be so funny if 15 minutes into the pot, you just see, like, their eyes go dead.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

You didn't catch up. Don't act like you caught up when you. You didn't catch up.

[Unknown]

She literally, like, drops her. Drops her binder. She's like, what the.

[Darcy Carden]

Who brought.

[Unknown]

Who is this guy?

[Darcy Carden]

Who is this?

[Unknown]

They're always bringing some gay guy. I told them no more gay guys.

[Sam Taggart]

Being gay isn't a good enough credit.

[Darcy Carden]

You have to.

[Sam Taggart]

Have you heard?

[Darcy Carden]

Have you seen the news? Tradwise are doing poppers.

[Unknown]

Are doing poppers.

[Darcy Carden]

Trad. Something like trad wife is hard for me because it's traditional wife, right?

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Darcy Carden]

That type of shit is hard for me. Like, why isn't it tread wife?

[Unknown]

Oh, you mean pronunciation. I thought you were gonna make some argument about where we are as a culture. You're like, why is it called.

[Darcy Carden]

A little bit like.

[Sam Taggart]

Say this again.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, so, like.

[Sam Taggart]

But trad.

[Darcy Carden]

We don't say traditional.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, I get it.

[Unknown]

You don't say traditional.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. So you don't say traditional. You say traditional. So then would it be a trude wife? But I know it's a D. Like, these type of things, I think. Also. Also, what about, like, Beyonce when they say, like, bae?

[Unknown]

I completely agree. I. I don't like when they say. I really don't like when they say bae. And it always sounds forced, right? It's always like the host of E News, like, Entertainment Tonight being, like, reading it on a. It's like.

[Darcy Carden]

It's like. But it's like B, E, Y. Yeah, I get that. That's bae. But it's also Beyonce. It's also like, okay, like, Mary. If I wanted to call my friend Mary Mare. Am I spelling it M A R or M A R E?

[Sam Taggart]

I'm putting an E on there because otherwise, mar.

[Darcy Carden]

It's tricky. Things are really tricky and hard.

[Sam Taggart]

This is a really tough time.

[Darcy Carden]

Really tricky and hard time. Yeah, I know. George is going inward.

[Sam Taggart]

What are you thinking, George?

[Unknown]

You're scared. Don't put me on the spot, okay?

[Darcy Carden]

You're scaring us, George. George, don't.

[Sam Taggart]

Don't go inside there, George.

[Unknown]

No, you're doing the.

[Sam Taggart]

What do you.

[Darcy Carden]

And I also. I'm willing to be wrong on that. Like, I don't know.

[Unknown]

On trad.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm just. And I'm also willing to be a hypocrite. I might be. I might do it all the time, but it's just trad is really trad. Trad do be trading trad.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, trud is like trud wife. Well, the thing is trad. Okay.

[Unknown]

Okay. We're actually now, like, fully post language. This I love tradition is grun.

[Sam Taggart]

Just trad wife. They do it because it sounds more glamorous. Trudwife sounds like truck.

[Darcy Carden]

It's bad. You're, like, trudging through the.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Is the drum of trad wife. It's like, in order to have to, like, eliminate their power, we have to start calling them trud wives.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, totally.

[Unknown]

But I also. Okay. Trad wife is one of those things that I have just never believed in as a concept or as a trend. And I will not be gaslit into thinking this is, like, some cultural force I have to reckon with. Like, this is literally, like, five people on TikTok, and it's, like, an easy thing to write about and to write trend pieces about. You know what I mean?

[Darcy Carden]

Like, you think I'm wrong? I know I switched. You're probably. I was gonna say you're probably right. And you're.

[Unknown]

You stand for nothing.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. I don't I don't.

[Sam Taggart]

George. I just want to say that, like, you know, I was once in the New York bubble and like, I know how that feels and like, you really do think so.

[Unknown]

You're saying in LA there are tread lines.

[Sam Taggart]

Not like in la, but in LA.

[Darcy Carden]

There'S like just outside and I.

[Sam Taggart]

They're really sympathetic to them. And I think it's like, it is a bigger culture than we know.

[Darcy Carden]

I think. Exactly right.

[Unknown]

Because to me it's just like Five Girls on context creators.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. Right. And I think it probably what. I guess what I was going to say when you went. I did. I flip flopped. But it was. I was John Kerry.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

You can't run problems now. I was going to go on to say, I think you're right. And yet I think there's so much of the country that we are blind to and have no understanding of.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

And it bit us in the ass once and it bit us in the ass again and it might. Again and it might get us. It bit us once, it bit us against.

[Unknown]

Okay, damn. I mean, listen, maybe you're right.

[Darcy Carden]

I don't want.

[Unknown]

I guess here's my question.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm not saying that.

[Sam Taggart]

Did that.

[Unknown]

Did the percentage of the population that is trud. Did that already exist before? We just had a term for like, there have always been.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, the argument is like a. Martha Stewart was like the type before where it was like almost an aspirational, like, she's making her own, like, table spreads and you're supposed to like, feel like you should want to do that.

[Darcy Carden]

And now as you say that, I'm like, I don't even really know what a TRUD wife is. Is it like a. Is it like a Little House Prairie Wife? Or is it like a 50s wife? Or is it.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, it's a little bit of both, broadly speaking.

[Unknown]

It's just like, you want to please your husband and you don't necessarily need.

[Sam Taggart]

To have a job and you like, fantasize about living the farm and making everything from scratch and whatever.

[George Severus]

Every day our world gets a little more connected, but a little further apart.

[Darcy Carden]

But then there are moments that remind.

[Unknown]

Us to be more human.

[Darcy Carden]

Thank you for calling Amica Insurance.

[Unknown]

Hey, I was just in an accident.

[Darcy Carden]

Don't worry, we'll get you taken care of. At Ameca, we understand that looking out.

[George Severus]

For each other isn't new or groundbreaking.

[Unknown]

It's human.

[George Severus]

Amica empathy is our best policy. Nerds, listeners. Are you looking for a shortcut to better auto insurance for you? Something that takes all the research off your plate. Something that's easy. Something that matches you with lower rates. Something genius. That's where NerdWallet comes in. Their nerds already did the work for you. Just answer a few questions and ta da, you'll be matched with top insurance providers in your area. Find the right rate for you [e-mail] after all, using Nerd Wallet is more than smart. It's genius. Not all applicants will qualify for the lowest monthly payments. NerdWallet Insurance Services, Inc. California resident license number OK 92033 hey, it's Ryan Seacrest. For Albertsons and Safeway, February is the month of love. And while you're spending time showing love to your family and friends, make sure you show yourself some love too. Now through February 25, shop in store and online and save on self love items from Dove like Dove Cucumber and Green Tea Body Wash, Dove Deep Moisture Nourishing Body Wash, Dove Antipers, Dove Shampoos and Dove conditioners. Offer ends February 25th. Offers may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details. This President's Day, upgrade the look of.

[Darcy Carden]

Your home without breaking your budget. Save up to 50% sitewide on brand new window treatments [e-mail] blinds.com the number one online retailer of custom window treatments, is the better way to give your home the presidential treatment. Blinds.com makes it easy with free virtual consultations on your schedule and samples delivered directly to your door. Fast and free. Choose from trending woven wood shades or upgrade to motorized. Blinds.com has everything and more, all with upfront pricing and no hidden fees.

[George Severus]

Need help with installation? Blinds.com can handle it for you or.

[Darcy Carden]

DIY with expert guidance from our design pros. With over 25 million windows covered and our 1,100% satisfaction guarantee, you can count on blinds.com to deliver results you'll love. Shop blinds.com's Presidents Day mega Sale right now and save up to 50 site wide plus a free professional measure up to 50 off site wide. @blinds.com rules and restrictions may apply. Now isn't Martha Stewart interesting?

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, let's start there. Podcast starts now.

[Darcy Carden]

Did you watch the.

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah, I watched.

[Darcy Carden]

Did you?

[Sam Taggart]

Of course not. I'm not watching shit.

[Darcy Carden]

You're too busy.

[Sam Taggart]

I'm so. I'm so busy doing the most important job in Hollywood. That's why the paparazzi are always outside my fucking office, whereas I'm just at.

[Unknown]

Home watching Martha Stewart documentaries left and right.

[Darcy Carden]

It just is. It's interesting because, like, on. On first glance or whatever, she's a trad wife, but she is. She doesn't give a shit. She was a billionaire ever.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

And she's a bazillionaire.

[Unknown]

She's also a, like, literally, head gaslighter in chief. Like, the way she's just like, yeah, my husband was cheated on me. And then the interview is like, did you cheat on him too? She's like, yeah, but I'm me.

[Darcy Carden]

I loved that. That was a. That was an interesting moment because it sort of showed that she sees the world the way she wants to see it. Yeah, it was a great.

[Unknown]

It was an incredible moment. Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Because then the. As. As much as I'm like, I got, well, okay, her going to jail through the dock, I'm like, fuck America. It's like, Martha Stewart was wronged. But then I'm like, is that the documentary telling me that?

[Unknown]

Well, the thing with. The thing with super rich and successful people going to jail is that every time one does, it is to make an example out of them. It's not like we live in a world where everyone who commits financial crimes goes to jail. In fact, it's quite the opposite. It's like, most people who commit financial crimes don't go to jail, but then every now and. And then, you make an example out of someone. I honestly think that's true of Elizabeth Holmes, too, who I do think should have obviously was guilty. But I just mean, like, how many startup founders have defrauded investors and like, not. That's a concept of the business. That's part of the business. And you literally, like, when you talk to them, they're like, yeah, you just have to fail 15 times and then you succeed once. And you're like, by fail, do you mean steal and accumulate wealth despite never making anything? Because you are absolutely killing it at that point.

[Darcy Carden]

So she's a cunty girl.

[Unknown]

So it's like, I mean.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

So it's yes and so.

[Darcy Carden]

It's yes and so, yes, and. Can I tell you guys something?

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

In. When I first moved to New York, I did maybe three episodes of background work on a little show called Saturday Night Live.

[Unknown]

Oh, I've heard of it. Do you have any idea. Do you have any idea what year we're on? I haven't read anything about it.

[Darcy Carden]

And there's a really famous Martha Stewart sketch where David Spade plays Martha Stewart. When I tell you, I'm all over that background, acting my ass off. Oh, it's really. Feel free to go back.

[Sam Taggart]

I will.

[Darcy Carden]

I'M really giving it my all.

[Unknown]

Wasn't that sort of like one of the ones that was deemed. I think there was, like, a clip of that in the documentary.

[Darcy Carden]

I kept kind of imagining. I kept looking for it.

[Sam Taggart]

I guess I'm not in this.

[Unknown]

I guess they cut my scene.

[Darcy Carden]

Thought they would have shown it.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Maybe they didn't get the rights.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm actually even remembering. This is so cute. My parents were visiting me in New York and because Martha was all over the news and the. And the, The. The. The fricking rags, there was a picture of Martha Stewart on, I want to say, like, Life and Style or Us magazine or something like that. And I was just front and center. Right over her shoulder, I guess. Not front and center, I guess. Right.

[Unknown]

And you were actually in the background, but so clear.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

That my mom bought, like, you know, 10.

[Sam Taggart]

I love that. That's so sweet.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[Darcy Carden]

Background work. I mean, what a time.

[Sam Taggart]

What a time. It is funny, there was such an era when you're starting and you're like, I'm in the background.

[Darcy Carden]

I know.

[Sam Taggart]

I did it.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. And I was like, I'm in the tv. I was like, I'm using this to learn. Because I was kind of like, there, you know. Have you ever done background work?

[Sam Taggart]

I have.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

Oh, I haven't.

[Darcy Carden]

There's a little bit of, like. There's some. Depending on how big the scene is or whatever, it can be a little bit of, like, mob. Like, you're kind of treated like cattle.

[Sam Taggart]

Horrible.

[Darcy Carden]

And. And you're. And. And you might have the thought. One might have the thought. I had the thought of, like, this is not me. I'm not like this. I'm doing this because I'm learning. I'm. I'm. Who's the grip, for example?

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Who's the dp? Like, I'm learning. I'm learning how to be on a set. This is. This is not me. I'm not going to run to grab my lunch. I'm not going to. When they bring the lunch out, I'm not going to run and grab it. I'm going to get it later. Like, I had all these sort of rules. And then after, I think after the third episode, I did, you know, every time they'd call me, I'd be like. I would be like, this is my moment. Like, I'm gonna get this call. I'm getting the call.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Even though I knew this isn't how you get on the show. I knew it. I was like, I know all this. And yet.

[Sam Taggart]

And yet still you get the call.

[Darcy Carden]

And you'd be like, I'm gonna spend Saturday on the stage.

[Sam Taggart]

I have work Saturday night.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. But. But then after, I think it was the third episode of that I did, I was like, I can never do this again.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, it's demoralizing.

[Darcy Carden]

It made me feel real bad. Okay, wait, is that fucked up and elitist and.

[Unknown]

And no, no.

[Darcy Carden]

Privileged. Yeah, it is.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I mean, it's privileged maybe, but I don't think.

[Darcy Carden]

But I felt it at the time.

[Unknown]

Yeah, no, it is inherently like, yeah, there are jobs that make you feel bad and there are jobs that make you feel good.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Yeah. Tricky, tricky, tricky.

[Sam Taggart]

And they also are cruel to background people. It's like, yeah, Moo.

[Darcy Carden]

That's how I felt.

[Unknown]

It's just like, a weird thing. It's so funny for your quote unquote role in the product to be reflected in the outside world, because it's like, then the. You know, they'll yell, cut. And it's like, oh, great, I'm now invisible again.

[Darcy Carden]

More invisible.

[Unknown]

And you have to remind, you know, now that you're not a background actor. You. It's like, you have to remind yourself right now, we're not doing that now. They're not meant to be silent. Like, I can actually talk to that person.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

But to be fair, every role is demoralizing. Like, unless you're, like, the star. That's true.

[Darcy Carden]

I've never had that.

[Sam Taggart]

And it's so, like, you are, like. It's just like the ranking. You're always in a ranking, and it's.

[Darcy Carden]

Always like, you're literally ranked, like, number one on the call. I know. It is. It is.

[Sam Taggart]

And, like, the things you get are better depending on how it's like, this is always. Can we just be normal? Can everyone be normal?

[Unknown]

Nut I. I have to say, I think everyone should be on a set as, like, a hazing ritual. Everyone in the world, I mean, should be, like, on a set as a hazing ritual. Just to see, like, also growing up and seeing. I've said this before, but, like, growing up and seeing celebrities, you're like, these are like, spoiled, rich, whatever, which obviously they are. But then when you see what they have to go through, even just physically, like, being. You're like, yeah, you deserve $1 billion. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Is really humiliating.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, I love this town.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. I know. You've been here for a year.

[Sam Taggart]

A little over one year. A little over a year.

[Darcy Carden]

It took me one full year of Being here before, I liked it, I.

[Sam Taggart]

I met peace with it.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay.

[Unknown]

I think you, I think I, I, you're noticeably happier and, well, I'm happier.

[Sam Taggart]

Than I was, but not happier than I was in New York.

[Darcy Carden]

Right, but New York will always be there and you'll always go back.

[Unknown]

Yeah, but you told me, I last secret. You told me, oh, we had a chat at some point and you, it was very funny. You, you sort of were like, you were like, so, all right, when are you going to move to la? And the implication was like, L. A is real and New York is like, what you do.

[Sam Taggart]

I do think, I do have a feeling that New York is like, no.

[Unknown]

I know, I, it's, I see.

[Sam Taggart]

And there's like in la, there's like a reality.

[Darcy Carden]

Totally. Do you, do you want to die in New York?

[Sam Taggart]

Listen, I do want to die tomorrow.

[Unknown]

If I, if it were up to me, then yes, okay, I will come here, here for employment reasons, but I'm never gonna move here just to be like, all right, like, yeah, I get.

[Darcy Carden]

You, I get you.

[Unknown]

If every, if work dries up in New York, you know, I'll get back to you.

[Darcy Carden]

I know, I know. I, I, I lived in New York for 11 years and go back all the time. And anytime I can live there, you know, like, like do something there to live there for a chunk of time, I'm always jumping, jump, jumping at it, chomping at it, chomping at the bit, jumping at the jaw, jumping. I'm jumping up and down, me, me, cast, me. Okay, and, but I, it is, it is, it is easier to live here, but it is better to live there. It's easier to live here. Yeah, it's better to live there.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

The older I get, the more I also, I do feel like, unlike some people who live in New York, I, at this point legitimately have roots. I mean, Matthew's from there. We live a 10 minute walk from our little niece. His parents live there. It's just as like, yeah, her address is, but which I do think complicates things. It's not like I'm, yes, New York is a fantasy, but I'm also living a very, this is your family embodied, like reality, where I am also extremely New York based. Matthew's job is New York based at this point. I have jobs that are like, it.

[Darcy Carden]

New York rocks, babe. I mean, I know also when you're there for years and years, you're kind of like, but it, no, but it does.

[Unknown]

I actually don't think the magic has Worn off. Dare I say it?

[Darcy Carden]

It's magic.

[Unknown]

And. And magic. And the thing with it is that, like, the magic keeps being renewed. It's like some new thing will happen and. And you'll be like, I can't believe Nicole Scherzinger's on Broadway.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, totally.

[Sam Taggart]

God, New York is always walks into.

[Darcy Carden]

Times Square with a. With a suitcase looking up at the sky. You know what I mean? Every day somebody walks in with a suitcase going, like, it's all starting for me. And so the energy is always like, electric.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Yeah. What are you doing for Valentine's Day?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, that's what. Okay. I want to bring it back to Valentine's Day.

[Unknown]

What's.

[Sam Taggart]

What time are we at? Oh, my gosh.

[Darcy Carden]

I want to talk for three more hours.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, yeah, I could talk literally forever.

[Darcy Carden]

This is the best.

[Sam Taggart]

But yeah. So it is Valentine's Day. Do you do anything? Are you doing anything?

[Darcy Carden]

I don't do. We. My Jason and I don't typically do anything. We're not. And this is part of it. We're like not. We're kind. We're both a little bit like. You don't tell us when to. Yeah, sorry.

[Unknown]

No, I mean, it's fine.

[Sam Taggart]

That's fine.

[Darcy Carden]

But I didn't have to say that. But you know, you don't like. We're not gonna like, love each other. We're not gonna go out to dinner, whatever. We're just. We have never done a Valentine's Day. I think not to dox, but I also have a niece or two.

[Unknown]

Where did she live?

[Darcy Carden]

Where they live. So we are going to a friend's house who has two kids, my sister's who has two kids. We're going to friend's house for sort of like a little kid Valentine's Day.

[Unknown]

So you're sexualizing children?

[Darcy Carden]

Yes. Who do you. Okay. Who do you love?

[Sam Taggart]

There's three other children here. Pick one.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm gonna show you a picture of three boys. Who are you gonna marry? No, we. We're just gonna like make Valentine's and Mary fuck.

[Unknown]

Kill.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, Mary fuck kill these four year old niece.

[Unknown]

Okay. Bitch, marry, fuck, kill.

[Sam Taggart]

Be ruthless.

[Unknown]

Be ruthless.

[Darcy Carden]

Kill the other kids in your preschool. Yeah, so we're kind of like making cookies and.

[Unknown]

That's cute.

[Sam Taggart]

That's very sweet.

[Darcy Carden]

Isn't it?

[Sam Taggart]

That's nice.

[Darcy Carden]

What about you? Whoa.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, George. I'm actually so glad George is in town.

[Unknown]

We're going to like a. Go ahead.

[Sam Taggart]

We're going to a party, a big gay party. Sort of club event.

[Unknown]

Like club event event.

[Darcy Carden]

Fun, like club.

[Unknown]

I mean, not that we're. Not that we will partake in that. Who knows? But I just mean like that type wouldn't be illegal. I'm coming up right now, by the way.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, right, I forget.

[Darcy Carden]

Would be illegal.

[Unknown]

The point is we're going to a big party, A big gay party where.

[Darcy Carden]

You dress up and stuff. Kind of wear like hearts and Valentine's.

[Unknown]

More like dress down, if you know what I mean. We're talking leather funies.

[Sam Taggart]

I. I'm so excited, Trip. I think it's going to be such a fun party.

[Darcy Carden]

So how fun.

[Sam Taggart]

Five years ago.

[Unknown]

It starts after you'll be done with your thing. You show up, but like go overboard and are in like the most like sexual leather outfit.

[Darcy Carden]

You got syringes, like kind of cute.

[Unknown]

Clothes, you have a strap on. I was thinking the same thing.

[Sam Taggart]

You like worship me. Five years ago, right before the pandemic.

[Unknown]

Oh, yes.

[Sam Taggart]

All of our gay guy friends went to Webster Hall.

[Unknown]

Oh, I was there. Right? You were there.

[Sam Taggart]

And I'll say it. We all did. Molly or many, many of us did. And it was so much fun.

[Unknown]

I don't recognize this story.

[Darcy Carden]

Can you imagine what those first few months. I can't imagine how many times you referenced that night in those first few months.

[Sam Taggart]

Constantly. Constantly.

[Unknown]

There were various things like that it.

[Sam Taggart]

Was like the last big night. And it was also like so telling everyone, like, I love you.

[Darcy Carden]

I love it. Was it so fun?

[Sam Taggart]

It was so much fun.

[Unknown]

We also were. At this point, it's like we were significantly younger. Like we were.

[Darcy Carden]

Were five years.

[Unknown]

We were.

[Darcy Carden]

Sorry, not five years.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Sorry to say five.

[Sam Taggart]

I'm the same age.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. We all are.

[Unknown]

The thing is, I'm not like. It's like I. I really have been feeling that. I'm not.

[Darcy Carden]

Me too. Those five covety years, I mean, whatever. Those five, like Covid strike Trump years, like they do be aging. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Girls going a little less.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Woman.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, exactly. But the. But five years. Five years are fucked. Five years is so fucked. Because that is like. That's half a decade. So you are.

[Unknown]

It is 1/10 of how long SNL has been on the air.

[Sam Taggart]

When you put it like that, it actually sounds so long.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, it's. It's 5. Like the difference of 22 and 27. The difference of 30 and 35. The difference of all. I mean, the. Sorry to. It's always. It's always.

[Sam Taggart]

No, it hurts, it hurts.

[Darcy Carden]

It's always the passage of time.

[Sam Taggart]

But that's I'm. I have a fantasy of this Is this, like, this is that night.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, then unfortunately, it will not be.

[Sam Taggart]

Of course it won't be.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm already thinking that.

[Sam Taggart]

But it's like, there's something so special about going out on Valentine's and, like, issuing the, like, coupledom and being like, I'm going out with 1 million gay people.

[Darcy Carden]

Or is it. Is it. Well, tell me later. I want to know, like, where it is and what you're doing, not that I'm gonna go.

[Sam Taggart]

You can. You're welcome.

[Unknown]

Can I say something potentially damning, like, risque? And if you guys are, like, gross, you can just point a gun at me, pull the trigger again.

[Sam Taggart]

Do you want to die in New York or la?

[Darcy Carden]

Zoe Deutsch.

[Unknown]

During this LA trip, I have felt uniquely unique, asexual.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, welcome to la.

[Unknown]

Is that, like, there's some. Because usually when I'm traveling, especially if I'm, like, alone in a hotel, like, you just. There's a little eroticism about it.

[Darcy Carden]

Totally.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

You want to be bad.

[Unknown]

Yeah, you want to be bad.

[Sam Taggart]

You want to put on look good for you and you want to ride on your back.

[Unknown]

Exactly. Exactly the way that I. I. Not at all. And I. I went to. I went to the gym. I was in the locker room. I had many opportunities to feel horny. I. It's like, where are you in your cycle?

[Darcy Carden]

It could just be.

[Unknown]

That's a really good question.

[Sam Taggart]

That was awesome.

[Darcy Carden]

Isn't that. So how long have you been out here?

[Unknown]

Like, four days.

[Darcy Carden]

Long enough. At least one night. Feel a little.

[Unknown]

Literally, I mean. Hello, George.

[Sam Taggart]

We're gonna get you tonight.

[Darcy Carden]

Tonight's happening.

[Sam Taggart]

We're trying to get you. Yeah, but, George, I want to. You know. Did I tell you this? You know, I've been hating la. I've been trying to like it. I was reading Joan Didion to try to understand.

[Darcy Carden]

Great.

[Sam Taggart]

And you know, there was an essay where she's like, it's like the 70s. And she's like, this is a sexless town.

[Unknown]

Oh, really?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah. And she's talking about, like, how it's a gambling town. And the thing about gambling places is there's no horniness because all you're focused on is, like, more money, more money, more money. And I do think it's true.

[Darcy Carden]

I think it is a sexless town.

[Sam Taggart]

Well, it's a sexless town.

[Unknown]

I mean, certainly New York. York is way more sexual.

[Darcy Carden]

God, LA is a sexless town.

[Unknown]

It's a sexless town.

[Darcy Carden]

It is a sexless Town.

[Sam Taggart]

It needs Valentine's Day. It needs someone to say have sex.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. I'm just sort of realizing it.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Every other city is not Chicago.

[Sam Taggart]

Horny, horny, horny.

[Unknown]

And I actually think that's why LA has so much dark.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Sexual. It's like. Cuz it's like when you got to. You have to become like perverse.

[Darcy Carden]

You have to be like a cannibal, essentially. Yeah. For example.

[Sam Taggart]

Just one example. Top of my head.

[Darcy Carden]

I don't know. Interesting. Okay, well, I hope that you get French tonight or whatever you're looking for. That's what I call.

[Sam Taggart]

I think we're going to figure it out for today.

[Unknown]

I really think some fun little like have some fun.

[Darcy Carden]

Zing, zing feelings.

[Unknown]

Yeah, no, I definitely need some. Zing, zing.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, good.

[Unknown]

It's going to be down with love.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes, exactly. Feel jazzy. Okay, great. Yeah.

[Unknown]

So that's what we're doing.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm hanging out with four year olds and you guys are.

[Unknown]

And we're going to a sex party.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

It's not a sex party.

[Unknown]

It's not a sex party.

[Darcy Carden]

It's not a sex party. But it's a sexy party.

[Sam Taggart]

It's a sexy party.

[Unknown]

And we have been. Oh, I didn't send you this. It has been officially announced that at midnight they're playing Abracadabra.

[Darcy Carden]

Wait.

[Sam Taggart]

As if it's New Year's.

[Darcy Carden]

That's so fucking fun.

[Sam Taggart]

It's going to be. I'm really. Come.

[Unknown]

Come at midnight.

[Sam Taggart]

No, it's gonna be so fun. I can't wait. I'm so excited.

[Darcy Carden]

Meet you at Webster Hall. Just kidding. I know we're not in New York.

[Sam Taggart]

I wish, I wish. Should we do our final seg?

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Sam Taggart]

I mean, I don't want to.

[Unknown]

No, we have to.

[Darcy Carden]

And for the record, I was an understudy in an off Broadway show that performed at Webster Hall.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh.

[Darcy Carden]

And I went on one time.

[Sam Taggart]

When was this?

[Unknown]

Darcy, you've done Broadway. That's true.

[Darcy Carden]

But this is not enough with this.

[Unknown]

With this underdog narrative.

[Darcy Carden]

It was pretty underdoggy because when I wasn't going on, which I did one time, I was in fact selling merch. How dare they?

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

No, being an understudy, much like doing background. Actually, it's worse than doing background work. The work you have to fit into it.

[Darcy Carden]

So much work. It's so. It's so much. Especially like. Especially an understudy that has to understudy many roles. That's nuts.

[Unknown]

What play was it, if you don't mind?

[Darcy Carden]

It was called the awesome 80s prom. Barely a play, more of a. An experience.

[Sam Taggart]

That is such an iconic jukebox musical or something.

[Darcy Carden]

It was. Yeah, I guess so. But it was like. It was along the lines of, like, a Tony and Tina's wedding. So it was like a very bachelor party. Bachelorette party. Heavy, like. Like girls night.

[Sam Taggart]

Got it.

[Darcy Carden]

Interact audience. Yeah. Anyway.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[Darcy Carden]

This is just me wanting to hang out with you guys longer. I'm like, what else?

[Unknown]

Website.

[Darcy Carden]

One time, my mom and I saw the Born Identity around the corner, and I used to get sushi down the street.

[Unknown]

And o. I mean, the thing is, we. We're not an interview podcast. But I also. I'm like, I want to ask you.

[Sam Taggart]

About all your work, but I, like, don't feel like it's.

[Unknown]

We can't. It's not like. It's not what people pay us. What people pay us to do.

[Darcy Carden]

You can ask me anything, but I don't want you to not do your thing.

[Sam Taggart]

But also, I'm like, we did it. We can't. We have to have you back.

[Unknown]

I mean, I do want to know about your experience doing Broadway. I do want to know.

[Sam Taggart]

There's, like, a lot about your New York experience I'm curious about.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I agree. You've sort of done it all. You're like kind of that girl who's done it all.

[Darcy Carden]

You're sort of contigo girl. Yeah.

[Unknown]

You actually. Go, girl.

[Darcy Carden]

Do you know what. Do you know what was announced today?

[Sam Taggart]

What?

[Darcy Carden]

I'm on the Handmaid's Tale this season.

[Unknown]

No.

[Sam Taggart]

Darcy.

[Unknown]

That's what you're here to promote. Can I say something? First of all, I'm so excited for you.

[Darcy Carden]

Just speaking of cunty. Go, girl. And, you know, just.

[Sam Taggart]

Of course.

[Unknown]

I'm so excited for you. I literally would die for Elizabeth Moss. I'm. I'm all in. However, something came up on my feed that was, like, this very serious graphic, and it was the Handmaid's Tale X Christian Siriano. And I was like, that is so funny. And then he did a collab with the Handmaid's Tales.

[Darcy Carden]

Yes.

[Unknown]

Are you part of that? Okay.

[Darcy Carden]

And I'm just sitting here smiling.

[Sam Taggart]

Wow.

[Unknown]

Does your role have any sort of comedic.

[Sam Taggart]

Is it serious?

[Darcy Carden]

It's so serious. But I think. I think that I was cast with the intent of sort of being.

[Unknown]

And you were like, no, bitch.

[Darcy Carden]

And then I was just like, I cannot be like, you know, they were.

[Sam Taggart]

Kind of tough material.

[Darcy Carden]

And I was like, I can't.

[Unknown]

It would be so amazing if you just Went full, like, ham blurred. Like, you were like, oh, oh, this is not where I'm supposed to be.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay, so that happened on My Red Hood.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay. But anyway, I just had to sort of, sort of announce that and hopefully.

[Sam Taggart]

That, like, oh, the news already broke. Well, I was hoping we'd break the news.

[Unknown]

No, we're breaking it. I hadn't seen it.

[Sam Taggart]

We're breaking it.

[Darcy Carden]

Did you guys see it? Did we break it to you?

[Unknown]

Okay, now you're being so.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm so, so actress.

[Unknown]

Everyone here seen that? I was announced.

[Darcy Carden]

I guess I'm like, breaking the news to the room.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, that's true.

[Darcy Carden]

That's true.

[Sam Taggart]

No, it's genius.

[Darcy Carden]

Follow me. No, I didn't. I didn't post.

[Unknown]

You guys should follow Darcy. You do amazing work on Instagram.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, so much for context.

[Unknown]

When someone who shall not be named met me. Clearly not who I was. And he goes, I love your stuff on Instagram. So our final segment.

[Darcy Carden]

Do you bleep that out or do you.

[Unknown]

No. Well, no, I'll bleep it out. I'll bleep it out.

[Darcy Carden]

No, but that is so correct.

[Unknown]

It's him.

[Sam Taggart]

Damn. Number one villain in Hollywood.

[Unknown]

Literally number the gossip. I have heard from the.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm telling you.

[Sam Taggart]

Number one villain in Hollywood.

[Darcy Carden]

From the tops to the bottoms. Interesting. I mean. Okay, RuPaul.

[Unknown]

Yeah. And let's just say that if he embraced either being a top or a bottom, he might be able to move on.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, wow. This is actually. I'm so glad we're doing a blind item.

[Unknown]

No, I know we're bleeping it, but then keeping it. Keeping it.

[Sam Taggart]

It's going to be bleeped.

[Darcy Carden]

Keep it bleeped.

[Sam Taggart]

It's going to be biggest villain in Hollywood.

[Unknown]

Biggest vill.

[Sam Taggart]

Confirmed.

[Darcy Carden]

Confirmed.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Sam Taggart]

And there's a lot of villains.

[Darcy Carden]

And there's a lot of villains. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Okay, let's do our final segment. Unfortunately.

[George Severus]

Every day, our world gets a little more connected, but a little further apart.

[Darcy Carden]

But then there are moments that remind.

[Unknown]

Us to be more human.

[Darcy Carden]

Thank you for calling Amica Insurance. Hey, I would just.

[Unknown]

In an accident.

[Darcy Carden]

Don't worry, we'll get you taken care of. At Amica, we understand that looking out.

[George Severus]

For each other isn't new or groundbreaking.

[Darcy Carden]

It's human.

[George Severus]

Amica, empathy is our best policy. Listeners, are you looking for a shortcut to better auto insurance for you? Something that takes all the research off your plate, Something that's easy, something that matches you with lower rates. Something genius. That's where Nerd Wallet comes in. Their nerds already did the work for you. Just answer a few questions and ta da. You'll be matched with top insurance providers in your area. Find the right rate for you [e-mail] after all, using Nerd Wallet is more than smart. It's genius. Not all applicants will qualify for the lowest monthly payments. Nerd Wallet Insurance Services, Inc. California resident license number OK 92033 hey, it's Ryan Seacrest. For Albertsons and Safeway, February is the month of love. And while you're spending time showing love to your family and friends, make sure you show yourself some love too. Now through February 25th. Shop in store and online and save on self items from Dove like Dove Cucumber and Green Tea Body Wash, Dove Deep Moisture Nourishing body wash, dove antiperspirants, dove shampoos and dove conditioners. Offer ends Feb. 25. Offers may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have supervision, enhanced hearing, extraordinary reflexes? To be, dare we say, superhuman? Well, Roku's new Pro Series TV can't do any of that for you, but with a 4K screen, side firing speakers, and a blazing fast refresh rate, it'll sure feel like it. Elevate your entertainment using all your favorite apps like iHeart and Play all your music, radio and podcasts. With the new Roku Pro series, your senses aren't better. Your TV is.

[Sam Taggart]

Starseed. Our final segment is called Shout Outs and in this segment we pay homage to the grand street tradition of the radio shout out. Shouting out to anything that we enjoy. People, places, things, ideas. We make them up on the spot.

[Darcy Carden]

Literally didn't think about this and it's cat.

[Unknown]

No, we have to make it up on the spot.

[Sam Taggart]

And actually, you're doing well.

[Darcy Carden]

You're doing. That's awesome.

[Sam Taggart]

I actually do have one.

[Unknown]

Okay, go.

[Sam Taggart]

What's up freaks, losers and perverts around the globe? You know, as we talk about the five years that we've been through, it's affected all of us. And I'll say it. I've been having back pain over the last few months. In and out. Back pain. I'm stretching. It's not working. I. I lay flat. It's not working. What the hell? Recently someone was like, well, do you just take an Advil? And I was like, but I don't do that. And they were like, just take an Advil. And I was like, okay, fine, I took an Advil. Guess what? It's Fixed. I feel completely fine. I guess I just need my muscles to relax for one fucking second and everything can realign and get back to normal. I've never felt more limber in my life. All I needed was one damn Advil. I've been hurting for months and I just took a damn Advil and I'm fine. I'm ready to go out and go crazy.

[Darcy Carden]

Caller calling in.

[Sam Taggart]

Yes, caller.

[Darcy Carden]

Hey, first time caller, I have a question. Okay, when you say take an Advil, do you mean one Advil?

[Unknown]

No. You got to do two extra things. Oh, three.

[Sam Taggart]

I do one Advil in the morning and I did one Advil at night.

[Unknown]

Wait, that's insane.

[Darcy Carden]

You can do up to three, but.

[Sam Taggart]

I don't want to do up to.

[Unknown]

Three because maybe one is, like, the equivalent of, like, snorting. Snorting, like one speck of dust.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah. Did you snort one speck of dust and feel better?

[Unknown]

Yeah, dumbass. One speck of dust.

[Sam Taggart]

I did one. One Advil in the morning and one Advil at night, and I feel amazing.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, well, if history has taught you anything, you should know that it is helping you, and therefore, you should take the recommended dosage, which is two.

[Sam Taggart]

This is.

[Unknown]

You guys are doing, like, Brandy and Monica. The boy is mine, but in shout out form.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, thanks for having me. I love the show. Bye.

[Sam Taggart]

Ciao. Bye. So one Advil is the correct amount. Xoxo, Sam, A couple it again. The lines are closed.

[Unknown]

What's up, freaks and losers? I want to give a shout out to an episode of Modern Family that I recently watched where the plot was that all the women in the Dunphy family cycles got synced so all three of them have their period at the same time on the day that they want to do a Get this family trapeze class for leap day. I repeat, the plot is that the cycles of the three women are synced, and it ruins the family trapeze leap day class.

[Darcy Carden]

What?

[Unknown]

And I just want to say, why don't we have hydrics like that on television anymore?

[Sam Taggart]

Why don't we have hydrates, like, on television anymore?

[Unknown]

Like, that is what a writer's room is for. Someone suggests, what if their periods got sink? And then someone says, that's not big enough. We gotta go more. It's gotta be leap day trapeze class.

[Darcy Carden]

Somebody said trapeze class. I've never said trapeze like that. Trapeze class.

[Unknown]

Trapeze. Trapeze.

[Darcy Carden]

And then some other person in the back corner says, what if it's leap day?

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Leap day and. Okay, here's a question for you. Do you think the cycles being synced was suggested by a man or was it a woman? That's like, how funny would this be? Like, it's like this happened in my family or whatever.

[Darcy Carden]

Or maybe it was like, the one woman in a. All writers. All male writers.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

It's like she's kind of like, I'll be.

[Unknown]

I'll be like, I'm a guy's gal. Yes, gal.

[Darcy Carden]

Women in their periods. Right. I'll say it. Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

And everyone's like, well, she said it.

[Darcy Carden]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

Did you need to end it or did we.

[Unknown]

No, that's it.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay, great.

[Unknown]

I guess just a general shout out to hijinks.

[Sam Taggart]

Also, we're doing a deconstructed version. Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

I laugh when I watch that show.

[Unknown]

For sure it is. I. I said this the other day publicly. I don't know if you saw. I. I did see that. It was announced that you were on A Handmaid's Tale, but I actually also announced that I. I believe Cam on that show is the best comedic television performance.

[Sam Taggart]

Yeah, he's good.

[Unknown]

Other than all of yours, of course, but I think. But of the 21st century, I'm like, this is to actually pull this off, to be doing, quote unquote, a stereotypical gay guy and pull it off to such an extent that it actually is. I'm like, I know that man. And it's such a beautiful portrayal of that kind of gay man.

[Sam Taggart]

No, it's genius.

[Darcy Carden]

It's so funny. It's funny to call Modern Family, like, underrated. Rated. Because it's rated as hell. But, like, I think because it became so popular, we now kind of look at it, like. But it is, like, chock full of genius performances. Ty Burrell.

[Unknown]

No, it absolutely is. Sophia is one of the great comedic.

[Sam Taggart]

That's true.

[Darcy Carden]

That's literally like. Like. Also because she's so beautiful, you kind of forget she is phenomenal. Like, perfect.

[Unknown]

I had beef with that show for so long because it's the reason Jane Krakowski never won an Emmy. But, But. But guess what? That's not for me.

[Darcy Carden]

It isn't. It isn't.

[Unknown]

That doesn't mean. It's not.

[Darcy Carden]

And it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean anything about Jane either.

[Sam Taggart]

No, of course.

[Darcy Carden]

Right? I mean. Oh, this fun. Okay. Speaking of my hair. Looking good. Jesus.

[Unknown]

No, it's just, like, jank.

[Sam Taggart]

Octopus.

[Darcy Carden]

Speaking of octopus. No, that's octopus hair. Smart ink.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, okay.

[Darcy Carden]

Okay. What's up, everybody? Hey. All you cannibals out there, it's me on. On the show. I'm Darcy.

[Sam Taggart]

That feeling when you forget the name.

[Darcy Carden]

Of our show, trl. I would like to give a huge shout out to the family that is housing my husband.

[Sam Taggart]

Oh, yeah, that's nice.

[Darcy Carden]

And I'm literally being serious because it's so fucking nice of them. Can you imagine housing two full adults like they are in college? This is so nice of you. It's sort of like an unending. You'll just house us until we don't need to be housed anymore. This is the nicest thing you could possibly do. Thank you for feeding us. You make us chicken sometimes. It's so cute. It's always chicken. It's so cute. It's so healthy.

[Unknown]

You're complaining about how it's always chicken.

[Darcy Carden]

No, no, no.

[Sam Taggart]

I'm like, nice, but just a lot of chicken.

[Darcy Carden]

No, I'm like trout or. You always feed us healthy meals. It's really you, you. Every time we say thank you, you say, stop thanking us. It is the nicest thing you could possibly do. You are the nicest people. I'm not gonna dox your asses.

[Unknown]

Are they famous? Yeah, they are.

[Darcy Carden]

No, no, no. I would say adjacent.

[Unknown]

Oh, I would say adjacent.

[Darcy Carden]

I would say adjacent.

[Sam Taggart]

It's giving grip ad.

[Unknown]

And.

[Sam Taggart]

It is.

[Darcy Carden]

I'm still on the air. I'm still on the air. You are doing the good, good Lord's work. He, him. God love you so much. God. This is actually God. It actually comes back around to God. I love you, God. I'm giving God such a big shout out. I believe in you. I totally get you. I'm like, magic is real and I love you. Woo. Woo.

[Unknown]

Stunning.

[Sam Taggart]

That was amazing.

[Darcy Carden]

Oh, God, that felt great. I really didn't think about it and. And it shows.

[Unknown]

But we apologize.

[Sam Taggart]

That's how it goes.

[Unknown]

No, you are not apologizing.

[Darcy Carden]

Great. I'm not apologizing.

[Unknown]

You know what I want to do right now? Imagine this. The three of us start over. Press play on Bridget Jones Mad about the Boy right now on this big screen.

[Darcy Carden]

Wait, did I even say. Yeah, I did say. What? I. I had a full deep sadness. I.

[Unknown]

That was my feeling.

[Darcy Carden]

It was like a real. It was like worse than Trump getting elected. It was like, really are in a. No, no. We are like, like, you know, we. It was like. It hit me in a way where I was like, we're in such a sad time.

[Sam Taggart]

That is a real bummer.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Darcy Carden]

And let's end on that note.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Sam Taggart]

Everyone, we're Sorry.

[Darcy Carden]

Thank you for having me. Sorry I was at your door.

[Unknown]

Darcy. The podcast is.

[Darcy Carden]

I know. It's all. We stopped right here. Literally.

[Unknown]

Okay. Oh no. They're uploading it. Enjoy it.

[Darcy Carden]

Thank you. Oh. Oh, yeah. How about this? Bye.

[Unknown]

Bye.

[Sam Taggart]

No, wait. Thank you for doing the podcast.

[Unknown]

What the hell? Okay. Bye.

[Sam Taggart]

Bye.

[Darcy Carden]

Bye.

[Unknown]

Podcast and Want more? Subscribe to our Patreon for two extra episodes a month. Discord Access and more by heading to patreon.com Stradiolab and for all our visual learners.

[Sam Taggart]

Free full length video episodes are available on our YouTube.

[Unknown]

Now get back to work.

[Sam Taggart]

Stradiolab is a Production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players Network and iHeart Podcasts.

[Unknown]

Created and hosted by George Severis and Sam Taggart Executive produced by Will Ferrell.

[Sam Taggart]

Hansani and Olivia Aguilar Co produced by Bay Wang Edited and engineered by Adam.

[Unknown]

Adam Avalos Artwork by Michael Fails and.

[Sam Taggart]

Matt Grubb Theme music by Ben Kling.

[Unknown]

Honestly, Honestly, Honestly. No one wants to think about hiv. But there are things that everyone can.

[Sam Taggart]

Do to help prevent it.

[Unknown]

Things like prep.

[Sam Taggart]

Prep stands for Pre Exposure Prophylaxis and it means routinely taking prescription medicine before.

[Unknown]

You'Re exposed to HIV to help reduce your change. Chances of getting it prep can be about 99% effective when taken as prescribed.

[Sam Taggart]

It doesn't protect against other STIs, though, so be sure to use condoms and.

[Unknown]

Other healthy sex practices. Ask a healthcare provider about all your.

[Sam Taggart]

Prevention Options and visit findoutaboutprep.com to learn more.

[George Severus]

Sponsored by Gilead Nerds listeners, are you looking for a shortcut to better auto insurance for you? Something that takes all the research off your plate. Something that's easy. Something that matches you with lower rates. Something genius. That's where Nerd Wallet comes in. Their nerds already did the work for you. Just answer a few questions and ta da. You'll be matched with top insurance providers in your area. Find the right rate for you [e-mail] after all, using Nerd Wallet is more than smart. It's genius. Not all applicants will qualify for the lowest monthly payments. NerdWallet Insurance Services, Inc. California resident license number OK 92033. Hey, it's Ryan Seacrest for Albertsons and Safeway. February is the month of love. And while you're spending time showing love to your family and friends, make sure you show yourself some love too. Now through February 25, shop in Stor and online and save on self love items from Dove Like Dove, cucumber and Green Tea Body Wash, Dove Deep Moisture Nourishing Body Wash, Dove Antiperspirants, Dove Shampoos and Dove conditioners. Offer ends February 25th. Offers may vary. Restrictions apply. Visit albertsons or safeway.com for more details.

[Darcy Carden]

CBS, Monday, February 24th Introducing the new.

[Sam Taggart]

Daytime drama beyond the Gates.

[Darcy Carden]

Welcome to Fairmont Crest Estates, where the wealthy and glamorous Dupre family rules the community with poor and sophistication. That is, until a cheating husband and his trophy wife start stirring up trouble. Find out what happens beyond these majestic gates and behind closed doors, where scandal, romance, betrayal, passion, secrets and revenge await. CBS Daytime is about to get soapier. The new daytime drama beyond The Gates premieres CBS, Monday, February 24th and streaming on Paramount.