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Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, sure thing.
Barbara Dunkelman
Hey, you sold that car yet?
Chris Demarais
Yeah, sold it to Carvana.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, I thought you were selling to that guy. The guy who wanted to pay me in foreign currency. No interest over 36 months.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, no.
Jon Risinger
Carvana gave me an offer in minutes.
Chris Demarais
Picked it up and paid me on the spot.
Gustavo Sorola
It was so convenient.
Jon Risinger
Just like that?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
No hassle?
Gustavo Sorola
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Chris Demarais
How do you do all you horrid plants? Hide your herbage in the Stinky Dragon.
Jon Risinger
And take a taste of our latest.
Chris Demarais
Tea if it's the last thing I do. Drop.
Jon Risinger
It's a mixture of snapper saw spiked tea leaves, a squirt of acidic ginger SAP, vampiric peach slices, a dew drop.
Chris Demarais
Of water and mixed with a honeyed botanist. One watering can of this whistle wetter will have you saying, Feed me, Seymour. Previously, our adventurers ran into Reggie the.
Jon Risinger
Imprudent Preacher trying to soothsay and sway.
Chris Demarais
Spectators into something silver or pure.
Jon Risinger
B team then went their way with the wind and eventually wound up at a furnace where the Baron was berating.
Chris Demarais
B team's very own private parts.
Jon Risinger
They danced with the axe wielding devil and saved the soldier from certain suffering. Now the Baron is bound and B team is begging a question. Grab a guzzler and let's get back to this gassy goss.
Gustavo Sorola
Hello everyone. Welcome to Tales of the Stinky Dragon. I'm your dungeon master, Gustavo Sorola and I'm going to hit our four players with an ARR. Go.
Barbara Dunkelman
Excellent. Excellent.
Jon Risinger
I'm allow it this time I had.
Gustavo Sorola
A lot of coffee. You can't stop me.
Chris Demarais
I open my mouth.
Jon Risinger
Like Ace Ventura.
Gustavo Sorola
This week's Arrow. This week's Arrow question.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, great bit.
Gustavo Sorola
What a year for Jim Carrey, The Mask, Dumb and Dumber, and Ace Ventura. All the same year. Like fire. What a launch to a career.
Barbara Dunkelman
Anyway, Liar, Liar, I think was the year after that, too, right?
Gustavo Sorola
Was it?
Barbara Dunkelman
I think so. I think it's 94.
Gustavo Sorola
Wow.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah. Good stuff.
Blaine Gibson
That was 96, but maybe I'm wrong.
Chris Demarais
That was 97.
Jon Risinger
Save me for stinky pop.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, 97, you're right. Sorry.
Gustavo Sorola
This week's arrow question is, what household chore does your character try to avoid? And that was sent by Crazy Mage524.
Jon Risinger
Any dice?
Chris Demarais
Roll them if you got them, boys.
Barbara Dunkelman
Are we doing a D20? Correct.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
5, 11, 19, 14.
Chris Demarais
You know, 5'11 is as tall as I am.
Barbara Dunkelman
Is it really?
Jon Risinger
No, no.
Chris Demarais
I'm like, five, nine.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, I'm 11, 19.
Jon Risinger
Very tall.
Gustavo Sorola
Looks like Natty's up first with a 19, then Gunther with a 14, Doug with an 11, and 12 with a five.
Chris Demarais
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
All right.
Jon Risinger
Howdy, y'all. My name is John Reisinger, and I play Natty Wonder, the drow warlock. Pausing for a burp.
Barbara Dunkelman
You got to burp like Natty.
Chris Demarais
What does she burp like?
Jon Risinger
I don't know, because I didn't get the burp out.
Chris Demarais
Smaller arrow.
Gustavo Sorola
That's not this week's arrow Question.
Chris Demarais
Forgive me.
Barbara Dunkelman
That should be one week.
Jon Risinger
I was always jealous. Is a weird thing to be jealous of. I was always jealous of people who could burp on command. And I think, Barbie, you're one of those people. There you go.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, my God. You're welcome, listeners. Oh, stop.
Jon Risinger
As like, a young boy that was always like, that'd be so cool to be able to do this. Anybody who could do it, like.
Barbara Dunkelman
But they're always small. They're never very impressive.
Jon Risinger
Okay, I got it out. All right, what's it. What is a household chore that I try to avoid? Was that the question? Mr. Mr. Gustavo, what household chore does.
Gustavo Sorola
Your character try to avoid?
Jon Risinger
So this might come as a surprise to everybody, or maybe it's not a surprise at all, but I actually found that I don't avoid any household chores. And the reason why was that I found that the activity of a household chore, whether it be like vacuuming or doing the dishes or folding them clothes, it brings a little spark of joy in my brain when I complete them. And so I actually found Them as a source of, like. It's like therapy. You go around your house and you accomplish a little something, and your house feels a little bit better, and you.
Barbara Dunkelman
Feel a little bit better.
Jon Risinger
And so that just became incentive for doing it.
Barbara Dunkelman
Natty, I have a question for you.
Jon Risinger
Yes, Doug?
Barbara Dunkelman
If I were to walk into your house, would your couches be covered in plastic?
Jon Risinger
Yes, but that's mostly because Gigi kept having messes on them.
Barbara Dunkelman
I just picture your house like. Like my grandmother's house that's like. But everything is, like, very pristine, but, like, a little vintage.
Jon Risinger
Yeah. We have a. We have a special dining room that no one uses except for special occasions. And we have plates that sit in a little armoire that. That are only come out for, you know, like, fantasy pope.
Barbara Dunkelman
I also said that in Doug's voice as if it was Doug's grandmother. I'm talking me, Barbara's grandmother's grandmother.
Jon Risinger
That's Doug's grand.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
An entire house I wasn't allowed into. I'm not even kidding. We were only allowed in, like, the.
Gustavo Sorola
The.
Blaine Gibson
What do you call it, like, when you. You turn your garage into, like, a little, like, house.
Chris Demarais
Oh, converted. Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
I was only allowed that there was an entire house and this was, like, a mansion.
Gustavo Sorola
Don't feel bad, because you're not allowed in my house either. Oh, man.
Blaine Gibson
You know, I know it's true.
Jon Risinger
When. When are you going to let Chris know, Gus, that you've actually been inviting all of us over all the time except for Chris?
Gustavo Sorola
Don'.
Chris Demarais
Extra dinner yesterday.
Barbara Dunkelman
Gus had a great time at your dinner party that you had.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Our weekly dinner party at Gus's house.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, we brought the plates out of the armoire.
Blaine Gibson
I actually have been to Gus's house by myself before.
Barbara Dunkelman
Like, without Gus.
Blaine Gibson
No, Esther was there.
Chris Demarais
Oh, did you call the police, Gus?
Blaine Gibson
The three of us.
Jon Risinger
Okay. Gus is making a face of like, I do not recall or know what you're talking about.
Blaine Gibson
I have no idea. Like, it was. It was probably 12 years ago, but it happened.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. Yeah. No. No recollection, but I'll take you. Oh, yeah, we filmed something there.
Blaine Gibson
No, this was like. Oh, non work related.
Gustavo Sorola
Really?
Jon Risinger
Okay, this doesn't sound sketchy that Chris is sharing this and Gus doesn't recall.
Blaine Gibson
It at all after a party.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, after a party. Okay, that makes sense.
Jon Risinger
Okay, well, that's my answer. I. I like. I like doing chores. I like them.
Gustavo Sorola
All right, thank you, Natty. I appreciate you sharing. Next up was Gunther. Hello, Gunther.
Blaine Gibson
Hi, I'm Gunther. The male crow folk fight spider. True. True. What?
Jon Risinger
Sorry, that was. That was. What's his name?
Chris Demarais
Hans? Gruber.
Jon Risinger
That was Gruber.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, it was.
Blaine Gibson
No, I do. I think it is not to have one. That is to not hold their house. It is. It fills one with shame. Because from my home, where the winds blow so hard and you must hold it so that there's nothing to topple you. Those who do not help hold the house. House they are. It is. We bring so much shame.
Barbara Dunkelman
What is your house made out of?
Blaine Gibson
It is. It is. It is in the desert. So the winds that they blow. And so you must. You must hold things down so that, you know, brace against them so that the wind does not blow them off.
Gustavo Sorola
Yes, Gunther, I have a question for you.
Chris Demarais
Did you just read from the Bible? What was that?
Gustavo Sorola
Do you have a carbon monoxide detector in your home?
Blaine Gibson
No, I do not.
Jon Risinger
He sounds like. Like a beta version of Chat GPT.
Chris Demarais
So.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay, let me rewind a little bit here, Gunther. I'm going to see if we can connect. So the question was, what household chore does your character try to avoid? And your answer is, not holding down the house because of the wind.
Blaine Gibson
No, I do not try to avoid it. It is something, I'm telling you. It is a chore that everyone must help with. Because when the wind in a windstorm, if you are not protecting the things that you need in your house, then, yes, then it will blow.
Gustavo Sorola
So you cannot avoid that one.
Blaine Gibson
No. No. The household tour I do not like is to.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh.
Blaine Gibson
With the tadpoles and their tails begun to fall. I do not like cleaning them.
Jon Risinger
Wait.
Chris Demarais
Okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
He doesn't like cleaning the tadpole tails.
Jon Risinger
Yeah. So that's something new to me about them. Frog like creatures. I thought they. I didn't know. They fell off like a lizard.
Blaine Gibson
The nubs do. Eventually they slowly become smaller and then they become a little nub and then they kind of. They come off with pieces.
Chris Demarais
Oh, my God.
Blaine Gibson
Because then gather them and they're cooked into the pot.
Gustavo Sorola
That makes sense.
Chris Demarais
They do lose their tails. I just looked it up.
Gustavo Sorola
No, Gunther just told us. You don't have to look it up.
Barbara Dunkelman
I know. Gunther knows the most about his species.
Blaine Gibson
Now, here I. Would you not eat the tadpole tails? That's not something I do.
Barbara Dunkelman
I don't think anyone was.
Jon Risinger
I figure if you did, it'd be like when you eat the placenta. That kind of thing.
Blaine Gibson
Yes. I don't know what that is, Doug.
Jon Risinger
That's the thing. Sorry, Doug. I saw your face when I Said that's a thing.
Barbara Dunkelman
Humans are weird.
Jon Risinger
I know. Doug, you have said you have no intention of ever having babies. So I'm teaching you about that kind of stuff.
Chris Demarais
Wait, the tles reabsorb their tails.
Gustavo Sorola
That's what.
Jon Risinger
That's my understanding.
Blaine Gibson
Yes, yes, yes. See, they primarily absorb it, but at after a certain point, because of the dry air, it becomes withered and then it. It. They must come off.
Gustavo Sorola
So, Blaine, you're thinking of frogs. Gunther's talking about croak folk.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, I'm learning about croak folk here.
Gustavo Sorola
Right, my bad. So you said, Gunther, that you would not eat them. But didn't you say earlier you put them in a pot? Yes. Or is that just like for disposal?
Blaine Gibson
No, no. They are to be eaten, but not for.
Gustavo Sorola
You don't eat them. No. Yes.
Blaine Gibson
You see, they be primarily for the animals. Oh, the animals. I will say this. My. My best mate, Bun Lap. He is so funny. He ate his own tail once. And I was like, do not do it, Bun Lap. That is gross.
Barbara Dunkelman
That's a cool name.
Blaine Gibson
Yes. And he did it. And I said, don't do it. That he did it.
Gustavo Sorola
What a cut up.
Blaine Gibson
Neither of you begin to eat your tail. I may laugh, but I shall not join in.
Gustavo Sorola
I only one. Might be the only one with a tail.
Chris Demarais
We're still trying to fit, and we still do not know where this tail came from. Natty, the people want to know.
Blaine Gibson
I will not eat it. I will not. No matter how much the air dries it out.
Jon Risinger
I have. I have a theory that if we were to get Gunther inebriated enough, I think we'd go full reverse and we'd get clear sentences. I think it's like. It'd be an opposite effect. Like he would just go up high, register and talk a little bit like me.
Barbara Dunkelman
Do you think he get maybe like a British accent or something? Cheers, my dear.
Jon Risinger
I had this friend, his name was Stefan Orel. And yeah, he. He was like that. It was Steven Urkel's alternate character when he went into his machine.
Barbara Dunkelman
So good.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, thanks, Gunther. That was a. That was a journey to get there. But we did. And I feel like I'm all the richer as a person for having experienced that journey with you. Next up in the booth we have Doug. Doug, have a seat.
Barbara Dunkelman
I just had a weird realization. Do you think a lot of our audience even knows who Steven Urkel is?
Blaine Gibson
Probably not.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, we have a lot of old. I mean, they're old because I'm old. Hey, I'm old.
Gustavo Sorola
Guys.
Jon Risinger
So I can hold. We have a lot of people my age in our. In our group.
Barbara Dunkelman
Leave a comment if you don't know who Stephen Urkel is.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
The Venn diagram of knowing Urkel and knowing his alter egos is pretty small.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. Only 6.1% of our audience is 45 or older.
Jon Risinger
Well, I'm not 45.
Barbara Dunkelman
I think millennials know in that range.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay, so 35 and older. What are we looking at about 22%.
Barbara Dunkelman
Or like 30 and older?
Jon Risinger
Yeah, that's a quarter. That's a quarter of our people.
Barbara Dunkelman
There you go.
Chris Demarais
They listen to us to get cultured. Okay. They walk away with more knowledge about things they did not know.
Jon Risinger
Me and my mamas used to sit down and watch TGIF every week.
Barbara Dunkelman
Dude, that was so good. I love tgif.
Jon Risinger
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Well, hello, everyone. I'm Doug, played by Barbara Dunkelman, and I'm an artificial bugbeo. Level 3 Subclass Battlesmith. And you know Doug, actually, you might not suspect this looking at Doug, but Doug actually, just like nanny, keeps a tidy home.
Jon Risinger
I believe it.
Barbara Dunkelman
He values his possessions. He keeps everything neat, and he likes meticulous activities and all that stuff. The one thing Doug tries to avoid but can't because it would be detrimental if he avoided this one.
Chris Demarais
That toilet.
Barbara Dunkelman
Doug doesn't like cleaning the toilet, but a little. Maybe TMI for the group. But Doug can destroy a toilet.
Chris Demarais
It's like flushing birthday cakes in there. What are you doing?
Jon Risinger
I do know. I do know, not from personal experience, from a friend, that if you do have a hairy derriere, it does cause complications in the turret.
Blaine Gibson
Can we not talk about that? Sorry. This is gross.
Barbara Dunkelman
We're called stinky dwag.
Jon Risinger
You just talked about a shriveled piece of body coming off of a person and them eating it.
Blaine Gibson
It's a frogtail, not butt hair and jingleberries.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Anyways, what they are.
Jon Risinger
Gus is losing it.
Barbara Dunkelman
I love it himself. A bidet, actually for. So he actually created one for his specific to toilet. So he gets nice and clean.
Blaine Gibson
You create water.
Barbara Dunkelman
Exactly. But. But the toilet itself. There's no bidet for the toilet itself, so you got to clean yet.
Gustavo Sorola
I see all. Yeah, that's. That's probably. I bet that's a lot of people's least favorite activity, if I had to guess.
Blaine Gibson
I bet you it's a really good use of the create water spell.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, I don't have that.
Gustavo Sorola
Gunther. What do you think about using water for that purpose?
Blaine Gibson
It is waste.
Gustavo Sorola
I thought you might say water.
Blaine Gibson
Water is A very precious material, and for you to be. To be using it only for those things that you do not need.
Barbara Dunkelman
How do you put your doodoos away?
Blaine Gibson
You bury them in the sand like every normal person, and then you drag.
Chris Demarais
Your butt through the sand.
Blaine Gibson
And like a normal. Like a normal human.
Jon Risinger
It's like, oh, my gosh. That's like, you know, when you go to the beach and you just got sand everywhere, but. But worse.
Gustavo Sorola
All right, Doug, thank you for sharing. I really appreciate it. Get out of here, because it's Tolve's turn to get in here.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay, bye. Thank you.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, Yoohoo. It's me, Tolv, and I am played by some guy named Blaine, and I am a male orca barbarian. I'm a little flustered at this question, Gus. Or sorry, Vuztago. You know, no one tells you when you get a beard how hard it is to maintain the beard and how much hair goes everywhere. So, like, in the sink, in the shower, you know, just all over the place. Beard hairs everywhere in my long, beautiful, curly locks. So that's very frustrating. And I think that that is the chore that I hate the most. Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
I have a question.
Chris Demarais
Tolv recognizes Gunther.
Blaine Gibson
So for a household chore, but do not live on a ship.
Gustavo Sorola
Now do.
Blaine Gibson
Are those not meant to blow? So why would you try and hold it?
Chris Demarais
No, I grew the beard. I acquired the beard after I moved from the ship. They were very, very strict about appearances on the ship. You know, Ironclad.
Jon Risinger
So anywho, y'all know how pirates are all about a manicured look.
Chris Demarais
Listen, you have not met Ironclad.
Jon Risinger
I hope that you do not meet Ironclad. Hey, I love meeting new people.
Chris Demarais
Well, no, you do not want to meet the these people.
Jon Risinger
I'm sure he ain't that bad.
Chris Demarais
Oh, you. You just wait till my very tragic backstory.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay, Matty, if you'll allow me to break the fourth wall for a moment.
Jon Risinger
Here does all the time.
Gustavo Sorola
That's actually a great setup and segue for any of our listeners. If you head over to stinky dragonpod.com and you can sign up for the free level of our Patreon. The other day I uploaded a like a behind the scenes look at how we recorded episode four and what the players hear. So I uploaded my rendition of the Jarl Ironclad voice on. On our Patreon, so it's available for everyone, even if you're just a free member. So head over to stinkydragonpod.com if you're curious to hear what the players hear when we're recording, because the final version is obviously very polished with music and sound effects and actual good voice actors. Hey, if you want to hear something crappy, stinkydragonpod.com.
Blaine Gibson
That'S where all the crappies are.
Gustavo Sorola
Was that it?
Chris Demarais
Was that your plug? Talking about Ironclad. So willy nilly, so happy.
Gustavo Sorola
Go happy.
Chris Demarais
He's very mean.
Barbara Dunkelman
I also. I need. I need to point out this is a very specific reference, so people would have had to seen both. So the voice you did for Jarl Ironclad is very similar, in my opinion, to the voice you tried to do as Elga in our narrative telephone episode with critical role.
Gustavo Sorola
That's funny.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, it has a little bit of a similar cadence, and I was just, like, general, like, European.
Gustavo Sorola
It's just garbage. Who knows? For.
Chris Demarais
For our pro Stinky listeners, it's also the German dad from Stinky Dragon Adventures.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
No, it speaks.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, you are. You've. You have been published and paid for. Paid to do that for games and movies.
Chris Demarais
Gus, you were in Halo 3, bro.
Gustavo Sorola
I was in Halo 3.
Jon Risinger
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
And also the longest running web series of all time.
Jon Risinger
Yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay, so cleaning up after trimming your beard. Got it. Thanks. Holes.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, mostly like losing hair. It's the shedding that gets me. Yeah. The glowing strands.
Blaine Gibson
I do not have hair.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, I know.
Gustavo Sorola
Do you ever get. Well, that's a separate hour question.
Blaine Gibson
Yes.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay.
Jon Risinger
You met our friend named Hairless Hutch.
Gustavo Sorola
You two might get along great. All right, let's dive into it. All right. Yeah. You managed to incapacitate the Baron and you tire up Restrainer. And so I know you. Your aim is to kind of interrogate here. So what's the first question you all want to ask the Baron?
Blaine Gibson
Why are we fighting each other?
Gustavo Sorola
The Baron looks at Gunther, opens her mouth, and says, for power.
Barbara Dunkelman
No.
Jon Risinger
Okay. I have a more direct question. What or who or where is the Pathfinder? You keep asking about that. We ain't got no idea what you're talking about.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
What's the miles per gallon on the Pathfinder?
Gustavo Sorola
We're in the market.
Barbara Dunkelman
What's a brand of car? Is that a Nissan? Nissan, yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Nissan's a cool name.
Chris Demarais
Nissan is a cool name. A very mid car, though.
Barbara Dunkelman
Everyone listening, who has a Nissan?
Jon Risinger
Going, hey, every Nissan I've had I liked.
Gustavo Sorola
Nissan and Honda are gonna merge.
Chris Demarais
I just wish that they would fix the look of their trucks. Their trucks look so.
Jon Risinger
I never bought a truck.
Barbara Dunkelman
What do you know of the Honda.
Chris Demarais
Accord.
Gustavo Sorola
In fairness, seeks the Pathfinder. So I seek the Pathfinder.
Barbara Dunkelman
You work for Infernus.
Jon Risinger
Y'all in cahoots.
Gustavo Sorola
I am Undarian.
Jon Risinger
That's. That's. That's a non answer.
Barbara Dunkelman
No. That's an answer to me.
Gustavo Sorola
Of course.
Jon Risinger
There you go. Was that so hard to just answer directly?
Barbara Dunkelman
So in front of. Seeks the Pathfinder. But we don't know what it is. So.
Jon Risinger
So you claim.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yes. Do you want to test if I'm telling the truth?
Jon Risinger
Let's play. Let's play a little role playing. Let's imagine that none of us know what the Pathfinder is. In the event that that's true, what would you say in order to explain to us what? Who or where is the Pathfinder?
Blaine Gibson
We will help you look for it. But we don't know what to look for.
Jon Risinger
We're not making promises like that, Gunther. This is not necessarily. We're joining up with them. I'm just seeking information.
Chris Demarais
No. Maybe we are.
Gustavo Sorola
Wink.
Chris Demarais
Wink.
Barbara Dunkelman
I like the idea that 12 says.
Chris Demarais
We cannot actually wink on command. I must say it in order for it to happen.
Jon Risinger
Maybe cough next time. Time.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay.
Jon Risinger
Don't. Don't worry about them, Baron. Just answer my question.
Gustavo Sorola
So your question is what is the Pathfinder.
Jon Risinger
Yeah. Saying let's play in a world where we don't know what it is.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Totally imaginary world. Think. I'm sorry. I can't help it.
Gustavo Sorola
A demigod.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Gustavo Sorola
And at this point, private parts, I guess would be like. Like tapping on Gunther's shoulder and whispering into his ear.
Blaine Gibson
Yes. What the demigod of directions.
Chris Demarais
Oh.
Gustavo Sorola
Everyone make a perception check.
Jon Risinger
Can I also request another check to see if I know of this demigod?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. Make me a religion check as well then for Natty. Okay.
Jon Risinger
I'm gonna do perception first. And then religion.
Blaine Gibson
7.
Barbara Dunkelman
21 for perception. For Doug.
Chris Demarais
20 for to.
Blaine Gibson
Can I do that too? Can I do a religion check? Is that cheat? Is that copying?
Gustavo Sorola
Sure, you can do both. Both?
Jon Risinger
You look at your own test.
Gustavo Sorola
You got to give me a perception check first though.
Blaine Gibson
I did.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
Where'd it go?
Barbara Dunkelman
You got an eight.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
Seven persons. That's a hard sentence. Seven for perception. 18 for religion. End of sentence.
Gustavo Sorola
So Doug and to you both hear like footsteps and sounds approaching the southern door. And then like a split second later that door opens. But I'll deal with that in a second. I gotta deal with these religion checks first.
Chris Demarais
Didn't even get to ask a question.
Gustavo Sorola
Gosh, Gunther, with a seven, you're not entirely certain. But you're kind of like. I would think you look at private parts a little bit quizzically, but however natty. You had like a 18. Was that it?
Jon Risinger
Yes, I'm very religious.
Gustavo Sorola
Do you think you remember the Pathfinder is the demigod of directions? I guess you wouldn't have heard private parts say that, but you know that independent of private parts saying it, obviously. And you know, as such as being the demigod of directions, it can be very difficult to find the Pathfinder because the Pathfinder kind of controls directions. Right. So it's hard to find. And the Pathfinder knows how to find hidden things.
Chris Demarais
Does it come with GPS?
Jon Risinger
Oh, sorry, it's got a GPS. If I might ask a question about my check, Mr. DM would I know because it seemed, I think when we talk to the. Who is that? That's that SOB in the pile of silver. The Wind Trader. When the Wind Trader, he was associated with Toves God, the water gentleman.
Chris Demarais
Water Gobbler? Yeah.
Jon Risinger
The Water Gobbler is the. Is the God of directions associated with the. With the specific God of the pantheon. Just out of curiosity, are you asking.
Gustavo Sorola
If they're related to each other?
Jon Risinger
Usually demigods are. We're sired by someone. Is another God. You can't be a demigod unless there's a God above you somewhere.
Gustavo Sorola
I see. So do they share the same lineage? Lineage. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I would say. You don't think so?
Barbara Dunkelman
Could I team huddle real quick?
Jon Risinger
Yeah, well we. The door is opening.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, I gotta deal with the door in a second. The Pathfinder, you know, is associated with the Veiled Eye and not the same as what you encountered before, but the.
Jon Risinger
Veiled Eye is one of our gods. That's what the answer is.
Gustavo Sorola
Yes.
Jon Risinger
Okay, I'll ask this later and let you all do what you want to do.
Gustavo Sorola
Sorry to interrupt your team huddle, Doug, but that door does open and you see an orc and a gnome walk in. The orc is holding a rum bottle and the gnome is holding a whip of some kind. And they seem to be arguing with each other when they stop and turn and look at you two. You four.
Barbara Dunkelman
Do we recognize them?
Gustavo Sorola
No, you do not. Yoo hoo.
Barbara Dunkelman
Hello. You fluttershooted. Awkward moment.
Gustavo Sorola
Perhaps the orc kind of like tries to hide the rum bottle a little.
Barbara Dunkelman
Bit behind her and says what's going on in here?
Chris Demarais
I should ask you the same question. Are you drinking on the job? Wink, wink, wink, wink, wink.
Jon Risinger
Stop saying it. Stop saying it. We got it.
Gustavo Sorola
Just follow my lead.
Jon Risinger
I am.
Barbara Dunkelman
I For one, like to hear the winx. Because if I don't see Tole's face, I want to know he's winking, you know.
Gustavo Sorola
Well, it's easier to pick up on the. On the cues when you get multiple sensory inputs. Was. That's right.
Chris Demarais
Thumbs up.
Blaine Gibson
When we are trying to be sneaky, it is good to say aloud.
Chris Demarais
What he said.
Barbara Dunkelman
Well, it's 5:00 somewhere.
Chris Demarais
Oh, is that so? Well, does the boss know about that?
Barbara Dunkelman
You know, it's funny you should say that. We were just talking about that. You see, I think I'm the boss. But Murphy claims she is the boss. Which one do you, you think is the boss?
Chris Demarais
Oh, Murphy is a pretty hard worker.
Barbara Dunkelman
See, Murphy, worker. You work. I'm the boss.
Gustavo Sorola
And Murphy turns to look at the.
Jon Risinger
Orc and says, no, I'm in charge.
Gustavo Sorola
I told you they left me in charge. You answer to me.
Jon Risinger
Are they dressed in a certain way?
Gustavo Sorola
The orc looks like she has a child. Like she's kind of young with a childish face and has a. A badger. Pauldron. And the gnome is a little bit older, maybe middle aged. And she's got scarred lips and she's wearing a tinsel tunic and has that whip in her hand.
Jon Risinger
Did you just say tinsel tunic?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
As in a tunic made of tinsel?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, tinsel tunic. What don't you understand about that?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, duh. You never seen a tinsel tunic before?
Jon Risinger
Are they like a. Like a. Like are they gonna dance to Charleston? What is this, this tunic?
Gustavo Sorola
Did you ask her?
Jon Risinger
I love your tunic. I would love to know where you got such a flashy piece of fashion.
Gustavo Sorola
Well, that's an interesting story. You see, when I was younger, I.
Barbara Dunkelman
Wanted to train large cats in the circus, but I just couldn't seem to make it work.
Jon Risinger
You know, the cats were bigger than me.
Chris Demarais
They wanted to eat me.
Gustavo Sorola
They never respected me, so I wasn't.
Barbara Dunkelman
Able to complete that.
Gustavo Sorola
But I liked the outfit and the whip. She kind of like flings it in the air a little bit. So here I am.
Blaine Gibson
While this is going on, can Gunther make sure he's keeping an eye on the baron?
Gustavo Sorola
Make me a perception check.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, Spoiler. Baron's gone.
Barbara Dunkelman
The tinsel distracted us. Is too shiny.
Jon Risinger
Just a little shimmy in and just. You can't help but look that direction.
Barbara Dunkelman
Nanny, I knew you would ask about the tinsel to. You want it for yourself, don't you?
Jon Risinger
Yeah, I do.
Blaine Gibson
I rolled the date.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You turn around to look and the baron seems to be making a break. For the door to the west.
Blaine Gibson
Oh, can I jump to pursue or like leap to pursue or grab?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. What do you want to do? You just want to like jump and try to make a grapple?
Blaine Gibson
Yeah. How far away are they?
Gustavo Sorola
She hasn't made it that far yet. We'll say she's 5, 10ft away.
Jon Risinger
Use your tongue. Use your tongue.
Blaine Gibson
Well, that doesn't have that great of a straight. Don't use your tongue. Strength. I will go for an attack. For it to be non, lethal, does.
Chris Demarais
It have to be melee then?
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, a melee attack. Non. Lethal. Can I do that?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, roll it. Hey, you're the boss. I'm just here to tell a story.
Blaine Gibson
That's a 13.
Gustavo Sorola
I don't have that open. I think that. I'm pretty sure that's a hit. Let me double check.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, I think 12 was hitting last time we were in combat.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, that's a hit.
Blaine Gibson
I would also then like to use a superiority dice die to make it a trip attack.
Chris Demarais
Oh, sure.
Gustavo Sorola
And just to like paint a picture for the audience, like what weapon? Or like how are you attacking? What does that look like?
Blaine Gibson
So Gunther turn season basically leaps forward, whacks basically with the back of the head with like the non stabby part of his sword. And then while. While the baron is like wobbly, then swings because Gunther has long legs. Swings around to make a trip with his legs.
Barbara Dunkelman
Nice.
Gustavo Sorola
And so just you said sword. I want to be clear. It's a rapier. So it's like instead of poking like you normally do with a rapier, you just kind of hit with the. Yeah, the. The dull side. Yeah.
Jon Risinger
Do rapiers have much of a dull side?
Blaine Gibson
Well, they have like the guard mine does.
Chris Demarais
It's like the Princess Bride, you know.
Gustavo Sorola
I think I'm like almost like toothpicks. They're like long and thin and pointy. Yeah. Roll your damage, Gunther. If you didn't already.
Blaine Gibson
That is a 10 for damage and then for my superiority die on tripping. When you hit with the weapon attack, you spend one superiority die to add the total to the damage roll. And if the target is large or smaller, it must make a strength saving throw of DC14 on a failure. They are prone. So that's an extra 8D8. I'm going to roll.
Gustavo Sorola
She is large. I'm going to go ahead and make that strength. Strength saving throw. She's got a plus five on it.
Jon Risinger
Dang.
Blaine Gibson
That's a total for 17 damage.
Gustavo Sorola
I rolled a 24 on the save.
Blaine Gibson
Dang.
Gustavo Sorola
But it doesn't matter. Because 17 damage plops her back down unconscious on the ground.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh wow.
Chris Demarais
Dog pile jumps on top and secures her with more rope.
Gustavo Sorola
The orc kind of takes a sip from her her rum and says, I.
Barbara Dunkelman
Don'T know how I feel about that.
Jon Risinger
I take Gigi over to the door that is the exit door and I kind of pull him with his leash and he's holding the ax still and I say, gigi, you watch her.
Gustavo Sorola
You watch her make a roll.
Jon Risinger
I rolled an 8.
Gustavo Sorola
I would like to think that Giggy keeps following you around wherever you go. Natty.
Chris Demarais
The more violent version of that is Giggy just decapitates the Baron.
Gustavo Sorola
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Barbara Dunkelman
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Gustavo Sorola
I was really hoping that the two NPCs were going to keep you guys distracting. The Baron was going to be able to make a break out of here without you guys realizing. So curse you Chris.
Chris Demarais
Way to go Gunther.
Blaine Gibson
Are we able to carry the Baron back to like the the leather table table? The leather table.
Gustavo Sorola
You could. The Baron is large so I don't think you specifically could Gunther, but a couple of you might be able to together.
Blaine Gibson
I need help.
Gustavo Sorola
I will help. At this point some grop begin walking in from that southern door as well. They've got silver ore with them them and they begin approaching the refinery to begin smelting silver. They begin operating the machinery that's in that room.
Blaine Gibson
Do they even look at us at all?
Gustavo Sorola
It seems like they're focused on their task at hand and they don't care.
Barbara Dunkelman
About the Baron either.
Gustavo Sorola
It just seems like they're just carrying the silver ore and going up to the to the smeltery.
Blaine Gibson
Could Gunther who's knowledgeable with smithing go up and he's already also has the belt like he's been smithing, go up to the melted ore, nod at the Guelp or whatever they are and get some silver and then go back to the Baron and like use the Metal to like pour over some metal to like smelt the handcuffs. Some like, crude handcuffs.
Gustavo Sorola
What would you mold them into?
Blaine Gibson
So I'm imagining if the, if the Baron's hands were like, what is the Baron wearing?
Chris Demarais
Tinsel dress?
Barbara Dunkelman
No, she's in a dress version of the tunic.
Gustavo Sorola
She's wearing that petrified wooden armor.
Blaine Gibson
Well, yeah, I think I would take some metal from the unsmelted and kind of just like. Yeah, I don't know. I have that also. That stick that melts metal and just try and create like some sort of metal bonds that could hold them onto the table.
Gustavo Sorola
You can try. You don't necessarily have like a mole to pour that metal into, like to shape it.
Blaine Gibson
It might hurt them.
Gustavo Sorola
Right.
Barbara Dunkelman
Do we want to hurt them?
Chris Demarais
Can to go over to the smelter and make a semi automatic rifle and maybe a super computer.
Barbara Dunkelman
I have faith in you. 12. I think you could do it.
Chris Demarais
I think I could do this.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah. You don't know until you try. Right.
Chris Demarais
I'm just gonna wing it though.
Blaine Gibson
I mean, I, I have proficiency in smithing tools.
Gustavo Sorola
Right, but. Right. Do you understand what I'm saying? Like, when you want to make something, you have to have a mold to shape it. Like, are you just gonna pour the silver around the Baron's wrists and let it cool like that?
Chris Demarais
Like components.
Blaine Gibson
They have their wood armor. So I'm just going to pour it over so it all solidifies over the armor so that they're like bound together, but it's not necessarily melting their skin.
Gustavo Sorola
I see. All right. Yeah. So you get some molten silver and pour it over the armor portion of the Baron, the petrified wooden armor, to try to fashion restraints. Make a. What kind of check would that be for that kind of proficiency, do you think, Chris, do you have something in mind you could roll for that sleight of hand?
Blaine Gibson
I don't know.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, let's call it sleight of hand, for lack of a better thing.
Blaine Gibson
21.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You manage to hold the liquid hot metal and pour it over the petrified wooden armor. And it begins. It begins sizzling a little bit and cooling down over the armor. And as it does so, the armor bursts into flames.
Blaine Gibson
Oopsies.
Gustavo Sorola
And it very quickly spreads over the rest of the wooden armor, igniting the baron in fire.
Barbara Dunkelman
Cool.
Chris Demarais
Very cool.
Blaine Gibson
No, it is hot. We need to put it out.
Chris Demarais
Does Toll see any buckets of water or anything to extinguish this? Or sand?
Barbara Dunkelman
She might be resistant to fire damage.
Jon Risinger
Possibly.
Chris Demarais
But they are on their last leg, like about to Die. And this could be the thing that puts them over.
Blaine Gibson
I wish I'd looked through my inventory before I came up with this stupid plan. But anyway, go on.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, you find a small bucket toll of water that you think might be for quenching hot metal.
Chris Demarais
Okay, well, I'm going to go quench that hot fire. Put doubts.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You toss the bucket of water onto the fire and extinguish it. But the baron lies there, unmoving.
Chris Demarais
Are they dead?
Gustavo Sorola
Make a medicine check.
Chris Demarais
Okay. Dr. Toll reporting for duty. That's an 18. Oh, my God.
Gustavo Sorola
Where did you go to medical school?
Chris Demarais
Oh, the classic university of Scarverd.
Jon Risinger
Oh, yeah, Scarverd.
Gustavo Sorola
You must have learned a lot at Garverd, because you can tell that the baron is no more, right?
Blaine Gibson
Yeah. While on the ship, Tolv was a certified rope doctor.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, right. What a callback.
Chris Demarais
Good callback.
Barbara Dunkelman
I also thought he said Scarverd, and I thought that was very funny.
Chris Demarais
I did. But we're gonna just go with Garverd because. Oh, it's fine. They're dead.
Barbara Dunkelman
Who cares where you went to school.
Gustavo Sorola
At this point, the orc and the gnome look at each other and say.
Barbara Dunkelman
Well, now we really need to figure out who's in charge.
Gustavo Sorola
They both begin arguing again about who's in charge. You don't know everything about management. You would be a terrible leader.
Barbara Dunkelman
If you were a leader, you would think about management.
Gustavo Sorola
I'm freeing for things. You're that bad of a leader?
Blaine Gibson
It is me.
Gustavo Sorola
They're ignoring you, Gunther.
Jon Risinger
Okay. Natty grabs Doug.
Barbara Dunkelman
Hello?
Jon Risinger
While everything that Gunther and Tove are doing is happening.
Chris Demarais
Quick, quick.
Blaine Gibson
Oh, no.
Jon Risinger
It's you guys. You guys are having your adventure. I'm gonna. I'm gonna have a separate adventure. I'm grabbing Doug.
Blaine Gibson
This is background noises of panic.
Jon Risinger
That's fine.
Blaine Gibson
Oh, no.
Jon Risinger
I grab Doug over to the orc and the. No gnome. So the orc and the gnome are not dressed in any sort of official looking garb, and they are not dressed the same.
Gustavo Sorola
No, they're not dressed the same at all. Make an insight check for me, Natty.
Jon Risinger
Vibe check.
Barbara Dunkelman
Is it possible? Could I also do a check to see if, like, this tinsel could have been made out of the silver that they've mined? Like, is that something that is a material that could have been made from silver?
Jon Risinger
Interesting.
Gustavo Sorola
I'll give that one to you, Doug. Without a check, just because you're a battlesmith and just because of Doug's tinkering nature, this does not look like it's Made out of silver? Or that it was manufactured here, this facility.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay.
Jon Risinger
Dirty 20 on insight check.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. There's something about the orc that strikes you familiar. It's something about the way that she carries herself or the way that she talks. It reminds you very much of your training during basic training. Almost like she's familiar with the mortalion.
Jon Risinger
And remind me, one was named Merfin. Who is Merfin?
Barbara Dunkelman
Murphyn was the gnome.
Gustavo Sorola
Look at you. Good job. You take an inspiration. Die, Barbara.
Barbara Dunkelman
I already have one.
Jon Risinger
Thank you, Barbara. And we don't have a name of the orc.
Gustavo Sorola
No, I don't think anyone's asked for the orc name yet.
Jon Risinger
How do y'all.
Gustavo Sorola
They. They pause their. Their heated argument and both turn and look at you. They. They seem angry. Not at you necessarily, but with each other.
Jon Risinger
I'm Natty. This is my buddy Doug. I heard your name is Murphy.
Gustavo Sorola
What.
Jon Risinger
What's. What's Yalls name? And points to the orc.
Gustavo Sorola
Murphin does not allow the orc to answer it. Instead interjects and says, that's Kiba. Kiba.
Barbara Dunkelman
Kiba.
Jon Risinger
Murphy and Kiba. I'd be so curious. How do y'all find yourselves down here in this silver mine? Coming into this room, they both at.
Gustavo Sorola
The same time, almost answer the exact same thing.
Barbara Dunkelman
I'm in charge of silver production here. Oh, Kiba, what is it that you're wearing? She looks at herself like, oh, these are badger pauldrons. What are badger pauldrons?
Jon Risinger
The pauldrons that are on her shoulder, are they shaped like the face of badgers?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, they're like. Pauldrons are like a piece of armor that go on the shoulders. And it's like they look almost kind of like badgers.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Gustavo Sorola
They're very decorative.
Barbara Dunkelman
I've never heard the word pauldrons until today.
Gustavo Sorola
I realized that I was like, oh, there may be a misunderstanding here. Let's expand on what this is.
Jon Risinger
Warcraft really prepared me for D and D a lot.
Barbara Dunkelman
I'm gonna say. This is expanding my vocabulary more than I ever thought possible.
Gustavo Sorola
Lots of D and D as a teenager and lot of World of Warcraft in my early 20s. Kiba continues and says, yeah, our friends.
Barbara Dunkelman
Hana and Grego told us about this job, so we came down here.
Jon Risinger
Oh, you guys associated with Reggie?
Barbara Dunkelman
Reggie? Oh, we know Reggie. You all met him?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
What's yalls check on Reggie?
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, we're all a part of Chase Chain, but Reggie takes it a little too far while it seems like he's trying to take a different Half of his work, if you know what I mean. We know Hanno and Grego.
Jon Risinger
We do. Why do we know Hanno and Grego?
Chris Demarais
They were possessed gardeners. We met them upstairs with the. Yeah, the Baron.
Barbara Dunkelman
They were the possessed gardeners.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, they might not be with us anymore. Kind of like the Baron.
Jon Risinger
Well, that's your job. To make sure the Baron stays with.
Blaine Gibson
Us while this is going on. Gunther and Tolvar are realizing the Baron is dead.
Jon Risinger
Is the Baron dead?
Gustavo Sorola
Yes. The Baron is no more.
Jon Risinger
Jesus.
Chris Demarais
I passed the message medicine check. Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
And frantically coming up with a Weekend at Bernie style methodology of keeping the Baron alive and.
Gustavo Sorola
Well, I'll let you all continue work on that.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, I'll get in here and stick my hand in here.
Chris Demarais
Can you go smell a pair of sunglasses?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yes, yes, yes.
Jon Risinger
You know, my buddy here, Doug and I, we've been actually looking to join a faction. We're kind of factionless right now. You know, when you find yourself in that kind of situation. And I've heard a little bit about the Chase Chain. Now I know y'all love them silver and that's why you down here doing your job. You guys also are all about the wood. Are you guys the reason why all that pesky wood was cleared upstairs on the ground floor? I'm referring to the trees being cut down.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, it's not our purview. But yes, the Chase Chain did handle all that. I mean, we handle all, all the silver down here.
Jon Risinger
Oh, okay. Do you know what like the big overall plan is to do with all this silver? Cuz them grubs, they busy.
Gustavo Sorola
Make a persuasion check for me. Because I feel like this is something she wouldn't necessarily offer up.
Jon Risinger
18.
Gustavo Sorola
Look at you. Natty's just so charismatic.
Jon Risinger
That's. That's why I have those, those modifiers.
Gustavo Sorola
Murfin begins answering. But then Kiba puts her hand over Murfin's mouth and continues answering.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay, well, we have to smelt the.
Jon Risinger
Silver as offerings to the Pathfinder.
Gustavo Sorola
She has a quizzical look on her face.
Barbara Dunkelman
To the Wind Trader. And the Wind waiter is the one who likes the silver.
Jon Risinger
Oh, oh, that's right. That's right, Doug. Thank you. That guy, he was all about the silver.
Barbara Dunkelman
Silver eyes. Weird guy. Yeah, very weird. Do you guys also, I guess like worship the Wind Trader? Like, is he your God?
Gustavo Sorola
I'll tell you what, Doug. You make me a persuasion check as well.
Barbara Dunkelman
It's not going to go well.
Jon Risinger
This is gonna go great.
Barbara Dunkelman
7.
Jon Risinger
That's a good 7.
Gustavo Sorola
Murfin bites Kiba's hand, so that Kiba pulls it away and yelps in pain. And Murfin says, we just have a deal with the wind trader.
Barbara Dunkelman
What kind of deal?
Gustavo Sorola
A deal. Murphyn kind of, like, squints and looks at you a little suspiciously. Doug.
Jon Risinger
Do you guys know the baron over there?
Gustavo Sorola
Both Gunther and. To make me performance checks, you guys.
Barbara Dunkelman
Also have to be doing a Scottish accent, just so you know.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah. What. What is the. What does the Baron sound like?
Barbara Dunkelman
Scottish.
Gustavo Sorola
It's a. Yeah. Scottish accent.
Jon Risinger
Posh.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
Which is apparently Scottish.
Chris Demarais
Scottish. Man, I can't even. I can't even summon. That's cr. No, that's all right.
Jon Risinger
Do mud. Do mud.
Blaine Gibson
14, 18.
Chris Demarais
Oh, Gunther's having a seizure.
Blaine Gibson
What was the question that you just said, so I know what to answer? I already forgot.
Jon Risinger
I said, y'all know the baron over there. And you guys started. Go turn into puppeteers.
Chris Demarais
My lads.
Blaine Gibson
Good to see you again.
Chris Demarais
Oh.
Gustavo Sorola
We'Re killing it.
Chris Demarais
We're doing so good.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yes.
Jon Risinger
They are dead.
Blaine Gibson
They are dead. We must pretend they are not.
Jon Risinger
How'd that. How'd that go?
Gustavo Sorola
Gus, I'm gonna make insight checks.
Chris Demarais
It was an 18. Come on.
Gustavo Sorola
No, no. Your roll was good, but I still just have to roll some insight checks on my side. One and a seven.
Chris Demarais
I think we got it, Gunther.
Blaine Gibson
We go to high five each other.
Chris Demarais
But it's just a clap the baron's hands.
Gustavo Sorola
Kiba and Merfin look at each other and look at you. And you see Kiba put the stopper in her bottle of rum and stash it in her pack.
Chris Demarais
Oh, he's getting serious over there.
Jon Risinger
Is Kiba gonna answer me?
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, sorry. I was so caught up with the performance, I forgot about your question.
Barbara Dunkelman
It worked on Gus.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, it worked on me. It was really good.
Barbara Dunkelman
The Baron, well, she's got her own deal. She works for us here. But she seems really focused on finding the Pathfinder and keeps wanting to head out to Endurage Bay. You can ask her about that place. Isn't that where we're from?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. Yes.
Jon Risinger
Yes. Fort Andrich was where we were.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You all are from Fort Andrich. You are supposed to head out to Endrich Bay.
Chris Demarais
Oh.
Jon Risinger
Oh.
Chris Demarais
We're heading west to the Endridge Bay.
Gustavo Sorola
Correct.
Chris Demarais
And speaking.
Blaine Gibson
Speaking of.
Chris Demarais
Oh, my God.
Blaine Gibson
Deal.
Barbara Dunkelman
Sounds like Mr. Bean.
Blaine Gibson
Speaking of our deal, I'd like to renegotiate. What were we offering you?
Jon Risinger
I do love how we have someone in this party who can do good persuasion checks and performance. But Gunther jumps in.
Gustavo Sorola
This is what we Got.
Blaine Gibson
Well, you're. You're not in the body of the.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, this is. This is what you. Work with, what you're given. Gunther, make me a performance check at disadvantage, because that was not a great Scottish accent.
Barbara Dunkelman
What, you don't think so?
Gustavo Sorola
I don't think so.
Blaine Gibson
All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right, all right.
Jon Risinger
If you're Scottish, get in the comments and let us know what you think.
Blaine Gibson
That's a. That's a five and a seven. If I use my inspiration die, does it just replace one of them?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, it would replace one of them.
Blaine Gibson
So it's going to be bad no matter what. Yeah, I bit my tongue.
Gustavo Sorola
They look at the baron and kind of ignore that question. Instead refocus their attention back on Natty and Doug.
Jon Risinger
Well, I'm. I'm all out of inquiries. Doug, you got questions?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, I have a lot of questions, actually. Kiba, I can't help but feel that you feel familiar. Have we met you before?
Gustavo Sorola
Kiba looks very closely and very intently at you, Doug, like, examining your face and says, nope.
Barbara Dunkelman
Can't say I have. At least, I don't think I have. I don't really know many bugbears. Where were you before you started working here?
Gustavo Sorola
Make an insight check.
Barbara Dunkelman
23.
Gustavo Sorola
You see Kiba, like, tense up a little bit, seeming like she doesn't like that question.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, I wandered around for a bit before finding the chase chain.
Jon Risinger
I grab Gigi, and I hold Gigi up to Kiba, and I let Gigi smell her.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, Gigi gets up in there real close to Kiba.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Hey, Gigi.
Jon Risinger
Do we know her?
Gustavo Sorola
Make a. Make a roll for Gigi here.
Jon Risinger
Gigi don't forget. Smells 16. Give me this one.
Gustavo Sorola
How does Gigi communicate with you exactly?
Jon Risinger
Well, you know how. How, like, when toddlers are talking and, like, they're broken, garble stuff, but usually the parent is the one who can translate it because you just. You hear him so much doing that stuff, you kind of figure it out. That's. That's me and Gigi. It's not perfect, but it's pretty good.
Gustavo Sorola
You think? Gigi mentioned something about mortalion.
Jon Risinger
Oh, okay. Where's Private Parts?
Gustavo Sorola
I would assume over there, because Private parts was behind Gunther. So I assume Private Parts is over there with the whole baron shenanigans.
Chris Demarais
And I make the baron salute Private parts.
Gustavo Sorola
That's confusing for so many reasons.
Jon Risinger
Parts get your butt over here.
Gustavo Sorola
Parts comes running over.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, does. Does parts recognize Kiba?
Jon Risinger
That's what I'm going for yes.
Chris Demarais
Whoa.
Jon Risinger
Parts.
Gustavo Sorola
Do you know Kiba Parts looks at Kiba and then begins looking down at his notes, kind of like going through them and says, kiba. Bucky. Oh, I thought you went MIA Kiba looks visibly uncomfortable.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, I may have spent some time in the Mortalion in the past.
Jon Risinger
Dog is taken aback by this.
Barbara Dunkelman
You were part of the Mortalion? That's crazy. Who would do such a thing?
Chris Demarais
Barb's looking around like a shifty person. That's where you got to say the wink, Win.
Jon Risinger
So you left the Mortalion. You joined up with the Chase chain. Is that the story?
Gustavo Sorola
Make a persuasion check.
Jon Risinger
17.
Gustavo Sorola
Kiba lets out a long sigh and.
Barbara Dunkelman
Says, I saw many battles and was witness to and performed many terrible things by my own hand. But one day I saw an opportunity. My commanding officers couldn't find me, and everyone thought I was dead, so why not take advantage of that?
Blaine Gibson
The Baron nods knowingly and then rubs.
Chris Demarais
Their chin with her hand. She's very interested.
Jon Risinger
At this point, Natty is trying to obscure vision of the Baron with her wig as much as possible. Well, I'm running out of inquiries and understanding of what we're supposed to do down here. The Baron is dead. I'm saying this in John's voice. You guys understand I'm meta talking.
Gustavo Sorola
Speaking of meta talk, I just want to point something out here. Yeah, yeah. Not to feel like you got railroaded here, but there's one vulnerability listed on the character sheet for the Baron, and it's vulnerable to fire.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, really?
Jon Risinger
Oh, I trust you, Gus. As soon as one of our party was like, I'm gonna pour molten silver on a living person, I was like, okay, this will end well.
Gustavo Sorola
So just putting that out there.
Jon Risinger
Usually when you heat metals up enough to be liquid, they're safe to put on biological organisms.
Blaine Gibson
At least we still have a body to animate.
Jon Risinger
That's what a sociopath says.
Gustavo Sorola
I think a necromancer, but who knows? Same thing. Yeah.
Jon Risinger
Well, we kind of got stuck down here against our wishes.
Gustavo Sorola
We were.
Jon Risinger
We were wandering around, doing some business upstairs, and then we fell in a hole that we weren't even planning on falling into. And then we came across the barren, and we weren't even trying to come across the Baron. And so we're kind of like down here without. Without any direction. We met the wind trader. That. That guy was a. Was a whole character. And so we ain't got really a problem with the Chase Chain, and they're not really part of our objective at this Point. I'm saying this to everybody, I guess, basically. Oh, to's in charge.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
Hello.
Chris Demarais
I wave with the Baron's arm, tell.
Jon Risinger
Him, what are we gonna do?
Chris Demarais
Okay, here's the thing. I'm gonna drop the Baron and I'm gonna walk over and be like. Hello, Murphy and Kiba. Good to see you. So you know how the Baron was looking for the Pathfinder? They told you about that, right?
Blaine Gibson
Baron nods.
Chris Demarais
Right. Baron, you know what I'm talking about. No, no. Do Mervin Akiba know what I'm talking about?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, they mentioned it themselves that the. The Baron was looking for the Pathfinder.
Chris Demarais
Okay, do you guys have any information on that? Do they have any leads?
Gustavo Sorola
Murphy will answer.
Barbara Dunkelman
No, no, that's the Baron's thing. We were just down here smelting silver.
Chris Demarais
Okay, got you.
Barbara Dunkelman
So, like, you could ask her. She's right over there.
Chris Demarais
Oh, no. She's very sleepy. Right, Right.
Jon Risinger
Baron, by the way, I rolled a dice because I wanted to check to see what Gigi was doing at this point because I had in my head positive and negative doing. I rolled a nat one. Gigi is chewing on the Baron's foot. I just want to make that very clear now. Okay.
Gustavo Sorola
Love it.
Jon Risinger
Gigi knows what dead is.
Gustavo Sorola
Murphy also says.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, I don't know about the Pathfinder necessarily, but the Baron kept talking about getting revenge against someone in Endridge Bay.
Chris Demarais
Did she name any names?
Jon Risinger
I don't know.
Blaine Gibson
Some council.
Barbara Dunkelman
The Council of Conversation.
Blaine Gibson
That.
Barbara Dunkelman
That's her thing.
Chris Demarais
Council of Barbarians?
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, no, no. The Council of Barbarians definitely didn't do anything wrong.
Blaine Gibson
My lips are sealed today.
Chris Demarais
Okay, so Murphy and Kiba, let's share information. How can we help you if you can help us? Because we're. We might have been aligned in our goals to get to Indridge Bay, unlike the Baron. And so maybe we can help each other out, you know, we. We need to get out of there. But this cave system is so. Oh, it's so winding and winding and there's so many things. So we're trying to get over there. So, like, how could you point us in the right direction?
Gustavo Sorola
Kiba would answer. Points to the western exit and goes.
Barbara Dunkelman
Go out that door and keep heading west. You'll end up at the next level above and head up from there. Muffin, I gotta ask. Oh, maybe not. Mo. Actually, I don't. I'll let Kiba speak for herself. Why did you leave the Mortalion? Like, what was wrong with it? You all look like you're pretty fresh in it. But battle and War can be very violent and ugly and I'd had enough of it.
Chris Demarais
I hear that. I mean we should probably. I don't know if we have any more information. They don't seem to know where the Pathfinder is. We're behind on our mission to get to Indridge Bay. We got parts. I think we should get out of here because we're kind of in a bees nest.
Jon Risinger
What would Tal say about that?
Chris Demarais
Guys, I think we got the information we need. We're running a little behind on our, you know, vink vinc appointment. You know, private parts. You're doing good, right Private?
Gustavo Sorola
He's nodding and making note, keeping notes.
Chris Demarais
Okay, great. We're gonna head out of here. We're gonna go to the vest exit Cuban. Murphy, you want to come with?
Gustavo Sorola
You want to come with?
Barbara Dunkelman
No know we've had enough. We're pretty content down here.
Chris Demarais
Okay, great. You live a prosperous happy life. And I hope you avoid all war and combat. That'd be nice. Sounds like a good life.
Barbara Dunkelman
Before we leave the room, could Doug just look around and see if there's anything like weapons or supplies or anything like that around this room.
Blaine Gibson
I don't know how if I can do this while still attached. Also I wanted to look in the Baron and see if they had anything.
Gustavo Sorola
Sure. I'll deal with Barbara first and then Chris. Barbara, make me an investigation check. I think we may have rolled this last week, but let's do it again just to be safe.
Barbara Dunkelman
I'm going to use my inspiration die because that was an eight. Okay, 19.
Gustavo Sorola
No, there doesn't seem to really be of anything that you can use. It seems like this is a room primarily for smelting. There's the Bloomery which is the conical chimney made of clay and the silver slag. And that seems to be the feature dominating this room. Room.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay, well, nothing to see here boys. Really empty room. Unfortunate.
Gustavo Sorola
Make me an investigation check as well.
Blaine Gibson
Since I'd been inside of the Baron for the last like 10 minutes. Do I have an advantage?
Gustavo Sorola
What do you mean inside?
Blaine Gibson
Inside of their armor. Like pretending to be.
Barbara Dunkelman
I thought you've just been holding them up.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, I thought. I thought you were weakened at burning. Maybe we've seen different movies.
Blaine Gibson
I guess in my mind Gunther's small enough he could have stuck his feet in some of the. Anyway, I'll investigation 12.
Gustavo Sorola
She doesn't really have anything. It seems like the things that she had were her armor of course which is now singed and burnt as well as she had that axe which flew out of her hands. I think Giggy still has it. As far as I know.
Jon Risinger
Owns. The word you're looking for is owns.
Chris Demarais
Perfectly crafted pair of silver handcuffs.
Jon Risinger
Ooh.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, I do love the idea in the visual of Gunther action actually wearing the baron like skin and just, like, painting her.
Chris Demarais
That's weird.
Jon Risinger
All right, where are we? Are we skedaddling?
Chris Demarais
Yeah, I think we gotta get going.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
Look away. Look away.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, that's a way to get us all to look at you.
Blaine Gibson
No, no. Can I have. Gesturing to the. To the other two, our little friends. I want to take the head of the baron.
Barbara Dunkelman
You want to take a head?
Blaine Gibson
Yes.
Gustavo Sorola
You tell that to the two people as you tell them to look away.
Blaine Gibson
No, no, to my group.
Jon Risinger
Why?
Blaine Gibson
It's intimidation for later.
Jon Risinger
I think that's a way to get people to. To kind of pay too much attention to us if we're gonna go around carrying decapitated heads.
Barbara Dunkelman
Do you have a place to put it away, or what are you planning to do with it? Like, attach it to your belt?
Chris Demarais
What if I meet you in the middle and I say, let's just cut off a horn and call it a day?
Blaine Gibson
That will do.
Chris Demarais
Okay, that's like, you know, probably proof of defeat, and we could use that as leverage. That's good thinking, Gunther.
Jon Risinger
I nudge private parts and I say, that's some good leadership right there, wasn't it? Stop saying vin. Vin.
Gustavo Sorola
He nods very encouragingly.
Jon Risinger
Okay, you make sure. Make a note of that for my boy to.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
So we cut off the horns.
Gustavo Sorola
Two or one.
Blaine Gibson
Two or one.
Chris Demarais
I think van will do.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
Just one.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. Yeah. You have a horn from the baron.
Chris Demarais
Great.
Gustavo Sorola
Kiba and Merfin, just turn around and leave the room.
Chris Demarais
Okay.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
They clearly don't care.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
As we're leaving, Natty whispers something to the dead baron before we're going.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, do we hear it?
Jon Risinger
No.
Chris Demarais
I kind of want to roll to here, honestly, you know, I'm very curious now. Can I give a little roll?
Blaine Gibson
Yeah. Can we roll it here, V?
Gustavo Sorola
I would say, if you're curious about that, first make a perception check. Check to see if you even see that.
Blaine Gibson
That's a 12, Devin.
Gustavo Sorola
I'm gonna say those aren't good enough. You wouldn't have noticed necessarily.
Chris Demarais
Oh, okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay, I'm gonna notice 22.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, my God. That does notice. So then make an investigation. Check dog to see if you hear it.
Barbara Dunkelman
I wonder what Natty's doing over there.
Chris Demarais
Is Natty doing.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, it's only a 12. I don't think I hear anything.
Gustavo Sorola
You hear it perfectly.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, I like your gate slightly cutting out of your microphone. I heard, I heard.
Jon Risinger
It just looked like you were kissing your mic a bunch.
Chris Demarais
Why is Natty kissing the baron's ear weird? Okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
All right, Captain Tob. After you, Sergeant.
Chris Demarais
Here we go.
Blaine Gibson
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Gustavo Sorola
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Chris Demarais
West exit, the one that Keeban Murphin told us about.
Gustavo Sorola
All right? You exit out the door on the western part of the room and you find yourself back in that hallway you were previously in. That dead ended in the door that was locked and had no latch. And you realize you're coming out from the other side of that.
Chris Demarais
Oh, so we've gone full circle.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, we went out the exit.
Chris Demarais
Were there any unexplored routes that we took based on you guys Maps.
Blaine Gibson
Maps.
Jon Risinger
There was a west door that we didn't take, right, Gus?
Gustavo Sorola
Correct. And you're looking at it right now, actually. If you continue down this hallway, it branches off to the south, which is where the long hallway with that mural of the coins. And then directly in front of you is another door heading west that I do not believe you guys went through.
Chris Demarais
Let's try that then.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
What does that door look like?
Barbara Dunkelman
Do you think we should be given the winchway or any more silver so you could give us more of that guiding wind for this journey or anything?
Chris Demarais
Or is our guiding with. With us still anymore? Or did it put.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther closes his eyes.
Gustavo Sorola
Sure. It seems to be pushing you to the west.
Chris Demarais
Okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
All right.
Chris Demarais
Still with us.
Blaine Gibson
Still here. Thank you.
Gustavo Sorola
It's just an iron door. Seems rather nondescript.
Chris Demarais
Okay, I'm gonna give it a. Give it a little open.
Gustavo Sorola
You open up the door, and before you is a decently sized room. Pretty good size. It's dimly lit with flickering lamps. The air seems to be dusty and the cave walls are shiny. And inside you see a few grilt mining on walls and in the ceiling. Actually, you see Cuba and Murphy in here.
Chris Demarais
God, we just followed them. This is so awkward.
Barbara Dunkelman
How did they beat us?
Gustavo Sorola
They left before you all did.
Chris Demarais
Yeah. Okay, well, I was gonna have a chat with the gang and maybe just. Welcome back. Hey, everybody. Give a small little round of applause to private parts for surviving the Baron. Good job, private. Wow.
Barbara Dunkelman
Duckster starts clapping.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, he's extremely sweaty.
Chris Demarais
Okay, we gotta get upstairs. We gotta get to the ground floor. If you guys want to do like a quick search through this room, but we gotta keep going. Vest, I think.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, Keeping Murphy. See, you all walk in and they remember you asked how to get out of here. And they. They both kind of point to the west exit out of this room.
Barbara Dunkelman
This is awkward. You know when you're like walking with someone, you're like, okay, I'll see you later. And then you, like, walk the same direction.
Chris Demarais
I hate when I'm leaving the chilies to go to my, you know, horse and buggy. And then I say goodbye and then I hug someone. And then we just walk to the same direction. So stupid.
Barbara Dunkelman
And you gotta make believe you're like looking for something in your pack. And you're like, okay, see you later.
Gustavo Sorola
And my shoes untied.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, okay. You go on.
Jon Risinger
Horse and buggy.
Blaine Gibson
Hello. This is my first time meeting you, obviously.
Chris Demarais
Oh, God.
Blaine Gibson
As we know.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, God.
Barbara Dunkelman
Could Doug do a quick scan around the room as we're walking through it?
Gustavo Sorola
Tolve it also, if you want to do that, make an investigation check to.
Jon Risinger
Saying horse and buggy just tickled me. I don't know why. It sounds like he's in a production of oklahoma or something.
Barbara Dunkelman
13 for Doug.
Gustavo Sorola
Nothing particular stands out to either of you. There's a few yellowish hooded lamps hanging around the cavern. The cave walls are kind of shiny with veins of silver that the grill seem to be hard work. Work mining and you know. You see Kiba and Murphy still arguing over who's in charge. And out of here there's an exit path to the west and one to the south. As well as the iron door to the east. You came in.
Blaine Gibson
Where does the wind.
Chris Demarais
I think it was west.
Gustavo Sorola
Right?
Chris Demarais
That's where they were telling us to continue to go.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, they were pointing to the west. Murfin and Kiba, you guys want to keep going west?
Barbara Dunkelman
I think so.
Jon Risinger
You're running this party?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You're in charge. You're the leader.
Chris Demarais
I'm just trying to be political. I'm just trying to be nice. All right, let's go.
Jon Risinger
Fast.
Chris Demarais
Keep going.
Barbara Dunkelman
Cole was a fan of democracy.
Chris Demarais
Hello, Murph and Keba. Good to see you again. Murphy and Keba.
Blaine Gibson
Pleasure to meet you for the first time.
Chris Demarais
No, this. This. You've seen them before.
Blaine Gibson
Guther, I have a question. While we're walking, can I. Can I ask private parts something?
Gustavo Sorola
Go ahead.
Blaine Gibson
What is the worst thing that you have seen in the in army? Probably you lighting the Barrett on fire and killing her. In more of past, not of today.
Gustavo Sorola
Maybe when our mess hall was on.
Blaine Gibson
Fire and you all failed to put it out. Why did you join army?
Jon Risinger
It's a proud tradition in my family.
Gustavo Sorola
He seems to beam at that.
Blaine Gibson
But why are we fighting?
Gustavo Sorola
You and I aren't fighting.
Jon Risinger
No, I think this conversation is getting deeper than what Gus was prepared for.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, I thought it was a question. Now we're having like a longer conversation. Just keep things moving along.
Jon Risinger
As we pass by the Grelps natty goes. Y'all should unionize.
Gustavo Sorola
You all continue to the west. And it seems like it's pretty rocky out of this exit. Almost like maybe the mine had partially collapsed and is now cleared out. But you continue your way to the west. And once you exit the room, you find yourself in a long passageway. And you recognize it as the passageway you initially drop down down into from the upper level.
Jon Risinger
Is this the room where the. The villagers found us and told talked to them.
Gustavo Sorola
They're one level up from here.
Jon Risinger
Okay, this is what we fall. We drop down into.
Gustavo Sorola
Correct?
Jon Risinger
To get away from them.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. This like. It's almost like a t intersection of two long passageways. The air's dusty. The cave walls are shiny. There was an unlit torchio, but I think Gunther took it. Didn't light it, but just like held on to it it. And then to the west, there's a path that smells of fresh air. You Came from the east, and then down to the south is that narrow crawl space that Doug went through where you eventually found the wind trader. Oh, and there's a hole above you in the ceiling that you all drop down into.
Chris Demarais
But we never went west. West though, right?
Gustavo Sorola
Correct.
Chris Demarais
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
And you said it smells good there. It's like fresh air. Fresh air.
Chris Demarais
Fresh air. Smells like the sea. Could be. Let's keep going fast, guys.
Jon Risinger
Follow your nose. Toes.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. Tove bravely leads away west.
Chris Demarais
It's the shoulders and the glutes into it.
Jon Risinger
Blaine is shimmying. Apparently that's what bravery looks like.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
It is brave to walk with such stupidity.
Gustavo Sorola
It's brave to walk like that in a dungeon without looking for traps. Tol steps on a pressure plate and the ground explodes. Oh, no. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. You all continue to the west, and eventually this. This path winds and leads back out to the surface level, and you find yourself back out on the ground level.
Blaine Gibson
Are there any villagers or anything around us with pitchforks?
Gustavo Sorola
You see some people here from the ruins of Raisin on the surface, looking down into the hole that you had previously fallen into several episodes ago, talking with morgue citizens of the ruins of Raisin down there. And they seem to be trying to coordinate getting the silver and the lumber back out to the side surface.
Chris Demarais
Should we, like, avoid them, do you think? Because they were kind of razzed at us last time and I kind of gave. I gave Cobb some direction on just taking some of this stuff.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, I think we should cut our losses and. And head. Head west. I think we've had plenty adventure here for private parts to be taking some notes for us.
Chris Demarais
Doug, how are you feeling? What's the vibe? We could check back in with Colb or Cobb.
Barbara Dunkelman
I know. I think we're. I think we've done heal. It's seems like. I think it's time to move on, you know, we'll remember these people fondly, taking plenty of notes of all the people we met, what they were wearing, everything like that. So if we do see them again, Doug will remember.
Blaine Gibson
We will see them at reunion.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, I want to get a quick check. How is everybody feeling? Spell slots, HP and such. You think we should take like a long rest?
Jon Risinger
I don't know what those things are. You keep saying, how are you?
Chris Demarais
How are your magic juices? Are you topped up there? Natty, you need to refill.
Jon Risinger
I'm doing fine. I'm doing fine.
Blaine Gibson
I think if we can find a spot that is secret, we would Be prudent to take a short break.
Chris Demarais
Doug, how you feeling?
Barbara Dunkelman
I'm Doug. Feeling pretty good, but, you know, if the team wants to take a break, Doug's a team player.
Chris Demarais
Gus, how are we doing on time? Like, we had, what was it, three days to get to Indridge Bay.
Gustavo Sorola
Look at you. Yeah. You had three days in game time. Let's say roughly 16 hours. You've gone through, like two shifts and you're entering the third portion of the first day.
Blaine Gibson
Do we haven't slept in 16 hours?
Gustavo Sorola
No. And in fact, I was going to bring that up in a bit. I was going to let you all figure out what you're doing if necessary. I was going to bring that up.
Barbara Dunkelman
Maybe we should take a little sleep.
Blaine Gibson
I have a question. In a meta world, like, do we get sleep deprived if we don't sleep?
Gustavo Sorola
I was going to explain that if we got to that point, but yeah, there would be, you know, you can continue and. And you can push yourself. There can be some downsides to continuing, like exhaustion, for example.
Chris Demarais
Okay, then I say once we get past the Village People from Raisin and find a nice little spot.
Gustavo Sorola
Is that what you all are doing? Just to clarify.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, I think we didn't want to re engage with them.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, okay, I agree.
Gustavo Sorola
As you all are talking amongst yourselves, figuring out what to do, you hear a voice call out, you found my axe.
Chris Demarais
Oh, PI la mode.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, wait. PI.
Jon Risinger
Gigi looks around, has no idea what you're talking about.
Gustavo Sorola
You all look up and turn around and you see PI et la mode walking straight towards you 4. Hello.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yes, the axe that you were looking for.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. I thought you all abandoned me there. After you freed me, you took off so quickly, Dolph.
Chris Demarais
Oh, you know, our social batteries are a little running dry, but we couldn't forget you. Paella mode. So, yeah, here is your axe, Giggy. Go ahead and give the nice lady the axe.
Blaine Gibson
Deagle. Deagle.
Chris Demarais
Deagle. Come on, giggy.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther, try and tickle the giggy.
Jon Risinger
Well, I'm. I'm rolling for two different things right here. If that's you guys are doing. First to was asking. Okay, I rolled a two. Giggy ain't compliant.
Blaine Gibson
Okay, well, yeah, can Gunther tickle to.
Chris Demarais
Like release the attacks chimes in?
Jon Risinger
I wouldn't do that. Gunther, he don't respond too well to tickles.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, I think I've already done it though.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
You know what I mean?
Gustavo Sorola
Like, I love the commitment. Yeah.
Jon Risinger
I rolled another two Giggy attacks, Gunther.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, my gosh.
Jon Risinger
Get him. So I need to roll for attack.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. Would Giggy swing the ax, or would Giggy just start chomping on Gunther and then drop the ax?
Jon Risinger
Well, because Giggy's attack is a claw, so I think Gigi would then have to use the axe.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay, so then we said it would be with disadvantage. That's how we had you roll on the barrel because it was so heavy and difficult to pick up.
Jon Risinger
Well, that's a nat 20. Do you have to roll again? If you're at disadvantage, you're at disadvantage.
Gustavo Sorola
So, yeah, you do because you take the lower roll.
Jon Risinger
What modifier did we give the attack?
Gustavo Sorola
I think we just rolled it, and then we decided to see. I'll look it up.
Jon Risinger
Okay, that's a 16. So it's a nat 20 and a 16.
Gustavo Sorola
That's probably a hit. What's your armor class, Gunther?
Blaine Gibson
Oh, it's a seven.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, okay, let me.
Jon Risinger
I just saw Chris wink.
Blaine Gibson
No, no, it really is.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Gustavo Sorola
Gigi, I think, actually has no modifier because Gigi is not proficient in any weapon usage, I would imagine. So there would be no modifier to that.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, Gigi doesn't have that listed on his character sheet at all. No weapon proficiencies.
Gustavo Sorola
So it would just be 16. Okay, so yeah, the axe swings around and hits you, but you. You deflect it. Gunther kind of knock it out of the way. It doesn't actually strike you.
Blaine Gibson
I think Gunther would like, because he's more evasive. He wouldn't deflect it. He would, like, flip over or something. You know, like, do a dodge.
Gustavo Sorola
Paella mode says, oh, my. Careful with that. It's very delicate. What's that? And she points at you, Natty. Is that my Tempest Tinker pickaxe?
Jon Risinger
Does Natty have a pickaxe?
Barbara Dunkelman
Who took. Did you take it?
Blaine Gibson
Oh, yeah. You picked up the pickaxe during the fight with the. The first fight with the Baron, Right?
Barbara Dunkelman
The Tempest Thinker.
Jon Risinger
Oh, yeah. Do not recall that at all.
Chris Demarais
He stole it off one of the gardeners, I believe the one that the.
Gustavo Sorola
Head changes into, like, a breath weapon attack.
Jon Risinger
I'm going to just believe y'all. That's what I've chosen to do.
Chris Demarais
Pie is so good we ran into you because we have so many things to give. You can. When Gigi took his swing, could Tolv have nabbed it when he was at the, like, apex of his swing, like, missing. I'm just trying to grab it from the thing. The baby make a.
Gustavo Sorola
If you want to try that, make a Dexter. Dexterity check to see if you are able to like, snatch at it.
Chris Demarais
Okay. Nine.
Gustavo Sorola
You try to. It's just spinning so fast. You're not able to grab it. This is.
Jon Risinger
This is. I have to. As the father of the group, this is exactly how this would go.
Gustavo Sorola
The baby has a knife.
Jon Risinger
If the toddler does not want to give you something, have fun. Have fun getting it from them. That's how it is. Natty hands over the pickaxe. I have no quarrel here.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, thank you. I've been looking for this. This for so long. Thank you.
Jon Risinger
You're welcome.
Blaine Gibson
After doing Gunther's little flip and seeing to not grab the axe, can Gunther attempt to with his tongue, grab the pickaxe from afar?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, if that's something you can do. I'll take your word for it. Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
You can use this tongue to grab stuff. I think it's like a 15 pound, like strength limit or something like that.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, go for it.
Blaine Gibson
But what would that be? Just like a slight of hand?
Gustavo Sorola
You tell me. There's not a check for it.
Barbara Dunkelman
Did we like do an any checks with pile mode before to make sure that, like, they're cool?
Gustavo Sorola
No, I don't think so. I don't know if you. Yeah. Really talked to her very much.
Barbara Dunkelman
I don't think we did either because.
Jon Risinger
She was under the. The imprisonment of Baron.
Chris Demarais
They were captured with. Within the obelisk.
Jon Risinger
Yeah. God. Couldn't think of a word.
Gustavo Sorola
So it says you need to make a dexterity or grapple check with it. Gunther.
Blaine Gibson
Okay. Oh, my God, I rolled the one.
Gustavo Sorola
Nope, Giggy's got it. Paella mode. Kind of sees the situation and reads the room and says, you know what? You all saved me. You gave me the tempest sinker back. Why don't you just drop the woodcutter axe on the way back when you're done?
Chris Demarais
Doug, you're a bit of an inventor. Could you like, you know, I don't know, fashion some sort of cage or something for a little Giggy here?
Jon Risinger
Oh, Natty's looking at you with some pretty rough eyes.
Chris Demarais
They're not telling me.
Blaine Gibson
You do not want me to try and make any sort of handcuffs. All right.
Barbara Dunkelman
How about, you know, Doug has a motherly spirit. How about Doug holds Giggy for a little bit.
Blaine Gibson
Oh.
Barbara Dunkelman
And just does some bouncing.
Jon Risinger
Do you want me to roll to see how if. What Giggy does with that?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, if he lets me pick him up and bounce him on Uncle Doug's knees.
Jon Risinger
I rolled a 17, which usually means the positive thing happens. So let's say Gig. Gigi lets you pick him up. He's still holding on to the axe.
Chris Demarais
More like Funkle dog.
Jon Risinger
Why did I not get that?
Gustavo Sorola
Funkle.
Jon Risinger
Okay, there. Thank you. Thank you.
Barbara Dunkelman
As he's holding gagy, could Doug. Are there, like. Would you say, like, rocks or pebbles around on the ground somewhere?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Could Doug pick one up and use magical tinkering to make a pebble glow a cool, like, blue color and, like, hold it up for Giggy and be like, oh, shiny pebble. Isn't this cool? It needs two hands to play with, though, because it's very delicate.
Gustavo Sorola
I feel like this is the kind of thing Gigi would be into. But I don't want to speak on Gigi's behalf.
Jon Risinger
I mean, Gus, you're part of the people that are holding the wheel, the steering wheel on Gigi. So does Doug just make a persuasion check, or what do you want to do?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, make a persuasion check. I'll tell you what. Make a deception check with advantage.
Jon Risinger
I like that.
Barbara Dunkelman
Oh, God.
Jon Risinger
No one can roll a winning roll against this toddler.
Barbara Dunkelman
I have a terrible modifier on my deception, so I rolled a six and then a five, so it's a six.
Gustavo Sorola
I think Giggy's hands grasp even tighter around the edge.
Chris Demarais
God, I'm not.
Jon Risinger
I just want to be very clear, because often I know I can be a stick in the mud. I'm not causing any of this. I just want to make it very clear.
Gustavo Sorola
These are the rules. This is what happens.
Jon Risinger
I have done nothing.
Gustavo Sorola
Pie. Elamog reiterates. Why don't you all just bring it on the way back? I'll be fine. I have a lot of work to do.
Barbara Dunkelman
I have to reset up my shop. Well, don't worry, because your ex is in good hands. And points to Gigi, who's not letting go of it.
Gustavo Sorola
I can see that.
Jon Risinger
Let him have some.
Gustavo Sorola
Have some fun with that.
Blaine Gibson
Was there a reward? I do not remember now.
Barbara Dunkelman
No.
Blaine Gibson
I'm missing accident, she says.
Gustavo Sorola
My gratitude.
Blaine Gibson
I will cherish it forever.
Barbara Dunkelman
I'll tell you what. Since you asked, I'll teach you a little something. Are you magically inclined?
Blaine Gibson
I believe in the magic, but I am not, so.
Gustavo Sorola
Well, I'll try and teach you something. I can teach you a spell.
Blaine Gibson
I shall try.
Barbara Dunkelman
It's a real handy spell. It's called animate object.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther bows listening.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. She goes through the motions and tries to teach you this arcane spell. Make a arcana check for me, Gunther.
Jon Risinger
That's probably high. With Gunther.
Gustavo Sorola
It probably is. I think he's probably good at that.
Blaine Gibson
No, I rolled a 5. I will use my inspiration die.
Gustavo Sorola
The trick is to yell it.
Barbara Dunkelman
That's how you know he's serious.
Blaine Gibson
That's a nine.
Jon Risinger
It's a good use of inspiration dice.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. It seems so foreign to you, Gunther, but she's like. She seems really enthusiastic about it and very interested in it.
Blaine Gibson
Can I look at, like, Doug and be like Doug? Perhaps you are more inclined to learn of these things. I just don't know if Gunther can, like.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. I'll tell you what, just to be safe, why don't I write it down for you? You see her dash off, off. Then a short time later, she comes back holding a scroll and she hands it to you.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther, this is very kind of you.
Barbara Dunkelman
Thank you for returning the Tempest Thinker.
Gustavo Sorola
And I'll see you on the way back with that woodcutter axe.
Blaine Gibson
I'm sorry I've shamed your teaching.
Gustavo Sorola
It's okay.
Chris Demarais
Before you go, Pie, when we came into town, I think Yadi said that they needed to talk to you. Does that bring any sort of bell?
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, I should go talk. Talk to her.
Chris Demarais
Do you need us to be around for that? I know. Could it be something important that pertains to us? Just curious. Weird question.
Gustavo Sorola
No, it's fine. It's our own issue to deal with.
Chris Demarais
That's how we found out about PI. There was a person named Yachty who.
Jon Risinger
Was looking for them.
Chris Demarais
I didn't know if that was something that needed to get full circled.
Gustavo Sorola
It was like a thing that could have happened before now. It's like time's past. It's gotcha, living world.
Jon Risinger
This is when you go into your quest log and you abandon in a quest. Yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Okay. You know any safe areas around here for us to set up camp?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, if you head west a bit.
Gustavo Sorola
There is a small clump of trees.
Barbara Dunkelman
You could set up camp in.
Gustavo Sorola
I know travelers like to camp out there.
Barbara Dunkelman
That sounds like a pretty lush area for a little napsky.
Chris Demarais
Yeah. Okay, cool. Bye, Pie. Don't run into any more Baron Z.
Gustavo Sorola
I'll try not to.
Chris Demarais
Careful out there. You guys want to head west to the clump of trees?
Jon Risinger
Yeah. I feel like overall that was a net positive.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
We saved a person. Met a wind trader.
Jon Risinger
Yeah. And she got her pickaxe back.
Blaine Gibson
I have shaved my family.
Chris Demarais
You're fine, Gunther. Don't worry about it.
Barbara Dunkelman
Did you just say you shaved your family?
Blaine Gibson
No. They do not have hair.
Barbara Dunkelman
That's not what I was asking. I was asking if you said you shaved your family.
Blaine Gibson
No. So while we're walking. Can Gunther chat for any surprises that might be laying in wait or anything that might be hidden?
Gustavo Sorola
Sure. Actually, what I was gonna do, I was gonna make the team leader make that check because he's taking points. So, Tol, why don't you make me a survival check?
Chris Demarais
Okay. That'll be a. That looks like a one.
Jon Risinger
What a way to phrase.
Chris Demarais
Was hidden behind a group of texts. So then I was just like, yes, that's a one.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
A one.
Gustavo Sorola
You all travel for a bit. Couple hours. And as you do so what was a light drizzle eventually turns into a torrential downpour. Along the way, you come across a curious set of skeletal remains that appear to be maybe non humanoid.
Chris Demarais
Can we investigate the skeletons? What kind of skeleton Wellingtons are these?
Gustavo Sorola
Make a. Let's call it a survival check, I guess.
Chris Demarais
Okay. If you guys want to pitch in with this rule, I wouldn't mind. 1810.
Barbara Dunkelman
I rolled it 18 twins.
Gustavo Sorola
In that case, Doug and Natty, you both recognize that this is a knoll skeleton. In fact, it appears to be carrying a small purse with it.
Barbara Dunkelman
A knoll skellington.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. G, N O L L. Could Doug.
Barbara Dunkelman
Look in the purse?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You open up the purse and take a look, and there's five gold pieces in it.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay, guys, a gold piece for each of us. And two foo finders fee fair and.
Gustavo Sorola
In fact, Doug, as you're looking at it and pulling out the gold, you see that there's another coin leading down a path to the left.
Blaine Gibson
Another coin piece?
Gustavo Sorola
Sorry. Gold piece. Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay, well, first, could I distribute each person a gold piece?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. I get one, too. One for each of us?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah, I said two to find those.
Blaine Gibson
Feet extra for me.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay.
Barbara Dunkelman
I'll use it for the group eventually.
Jon Risinger
Is Doc still holding Gigi?
Barbara Dunkelman
Yes.
Chris Demarais
Where's Gigi?
Barbara Dunkelman
With, like, one arm while he's, like, looking at the other.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Hey, guys, there's a. There seems to be another gold piece over there just out in the open. But it seems a little suspicious. Maybe the skeleton who used to be a gnoll, was looking for something or collecting gold pieces. Got mid collection.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
So I don't know if someone wants to maybe, like, try to reach for the piece and see what happens, like, from a distance type thing. Anyone? Anyone have like a mage hand or something?
Jon Risinger
Oh, yeah, I do.
Blaine Gibson
I do.
Jon Risinger
I forgot I have it. I haven't used it.
Chris Demarais
Use the force.
Jon Risinger
I'm using the force called my hand. And I cast mage hand and I pick up the coin.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther, like, kind of Hide in the woods while this is happening. Sure.
Gustavo Sorola
Make a stealth check, Gunther. Yeah. You pick it up and retrieve it, Natty. And as you're doing so, 15. Oh, that's a good roll. You see, there's another gold coin further down the path to the left on the ground.
Jon Risinger
I gave that gold coin to Giggy.
Gustavo Sorola
The one you just got. Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
Can't carry with both hands holding that axe.
Jon Risinger
Oh, I put it in his mouth.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, we'll get that back in two to three business.
Jon Risinger
That's where he keeps all his money. Machan is 30ft range. Can I just go to the next one?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
Okay. I pick up that one, and I bring it back to Giggy, and I feed it to the giggy bank.
Gustavo Sorola
So Giggy now has two gold pieces in his mouth.
Jon Risinger
Well, in his possession.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, okay.
Chris Demarais
Tom, did you just make a piece of merch that we're gonna have to sell in the store now?
Jon Risinger
The giggy bank.
Gustavo Sorola
Come on.
Blaine Gibson
I love it.
Jon Risinger
Oh, I didn't even real. It's like a piggy bank.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, clever.
Blaine Gibson
It's a giggy bank. Yeah, but you. It goes in, but the coins never come out.
Chris Demarais
And it's indestructible.
Jon Risinger
They come out in about two hours.
Gustavo Sorola
You look further down the path, and you see there's another gold coin even further, more than 30ft away. Now, at this point.
Jon Risinger
Okay. Gigi runs after those coins.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. Yeah, there's a couple more guys.
Chris Demarais
As team leader, I feel like I have to point out this is so clearly a trap. I mean, Skellington's a trail of gold.
Jon Risinger
Gigi keeps following the coins and eating them.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay.
Blaine Gibson
I guess Guntherapy. Gunther's following discreetly from his hidden spot.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. Yeah. You watch Gigi go. And total going down that path. There were five gold coins. I don't know if you want to add that for Gigi and Gunther. Make me a perception check.
Blaine Gibson
8.
Gustavo Sorola
And you see that at the end of the path? Gigi doesn't pay any attention to it because, you know, Gigi's preoccupied with the gold. But you see, down at the end of the path, there's a. What appears to be an abandoned campsite.
Chris Demarais
Oh, convenient.
Blaine Gibson
Appears to be abandoned. Does it look like recently abandoned or abandoned a long time ago? Is, like, the dust of the fire still smoldering, or is there any, like, ash at all where it'd been blown away and covered with, you know, growth?
Gustavo Sorola
You'll have to get out from your stealth and go out and investigate it if you want to ascertain any further. Details.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther looks at his leader.
Gustavo Sorola
You probably can't see them anymore at this point because you've gone down more. More than 30. Like you're down separated on your own.
Blaine Gibson
Gotcha. All right then Gunther's gonna move closer in to investigate then. Okay, like still staying out of the out of view, but like get closer.
Gustavo Sorola
You can't have it both ways. I said like you're gonna have to get out of stealth if you want to come out here and. And investigate.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther leaves and goes back to the group.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay. And you report what you found.
Blaine Gibson
There is an abandoned campsite. Gigi is having lots of fun, but I worry that it could be a trap.
Chris Demarais
Okay, so guys, let's maybe head towards the camp. Split up, surround it and then move in slowly in case it's a trap. That sounds fun.
Blaine Gibson
Yes.
Chris Demarais
Cool little stealth mission, huh?
Barbara Dunkelman
Cool little stealth mission.
Blaine Gibson
I shall. I shall go from above. And Gunther wants to like climb up the tree and go across. Can I do that?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. Make a.
Barbara Dunkelman
Just imagining this like frog just leaping from.
Gustavo Sorola
Make a strength check to get up in the tree, I guess.
Blaine Gibson
Can I do acrobatics?
Gustavo Sorola
Are you going to jump? Yeah, that's right. I forgot you are a croak folk.
Blaine Gibson
So.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, I'll give you that one.
Blaine Gibson
That's a 15.
Gustavo Sorola
You hop up into the tree and make your way that way. And then what's the. What's everyone else's plan of attack here?
Jon Risinger
I'm just walking down the path.
Gustavo Sorola
All right.
Chris Demarais
Okay. They're just walking down the path. Then I want to go through some of the brush and then maybe approach the camp from the other direction that Gunther is approaching from.
Gustavo Sorola
And Doug.
Barbara Dunkelman
Doug I think would kind of just follow the path, but sneakily since he's very sneaky.
Blaine Gibson
Oh, I just like imagine.
Barbara Dunkelman
It'S like a cronk from Emperor's new brew.
Gustavo Sorola
Make me a stealth check, Doug, just so I have it.
Barbara Dunkelman
Do I get advantage?
Gustavo Sorola
Not if you're crunking.
Barbara Dunkelman
I'm not crunking. I'm sneaking.
Gustavo Sorola
Sure, why not?
Barbara Dunkelman
Okay. 21.
Blaine Gibson
Oh.
Chris Demarais
Where did Doug go?
Gustavo Sorola
I just go natty. You walk down the path and you know, you walk into a campsite, much like Gunther described it. You look around and it appears abandoned. There's nobody here. But you see some packs and a bonfire amongst some tree stumps that seem to be giving an edge to the clearing.
Jon Risinger
Quick question then. What is it about it that seems abandoned? If you just described a little.
Gustavo Sorola
There's no one here.
Jon Risinger
Oh, okay. Unoccupied?
Barbara Dunkelman
Sure.
Jon Risinger
Okay. My brain I'm like, abandoned means everything's gone but packs and a bonfire means not abandoned, but unoccupied. But that's just semantic. So there's clearly people that are staying here just aren't here right now.
Gustavo Sorola
Correct.
Chris Demarais
Okay, here's the thing, though. Because there was Skellingtons over there. I mean, they must have abandoned it. That's strange. Is that weird to you guys?
Jon Risinger
I mean, I don't know how long them bones been there. They could been there for a long. A long time. Usually bones means that body been there for a while.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, but if there's like, gold coins leading from the Skellington to the camp, but there's a lit fire, that's strange.
Jon Risinger
Maybe that knoll was stealing from them and then died of old age.
Chris Demarais
Yep, it's a very.
Jon Risinger
Just at a really bad time.
Chris Demarais
Logical hypothesis, yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Died of old age and then was left there rotting away for years and years.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, his last action was stealing those coins before he died.
Chris Demarais
There's no tent or anything. Oh, God. Gus is rolling something.
Gustavo Sorola
Gunther, as you're in the tree watching, an arrow whizzes by your head, nearly hitting you, but misses. Oh. Oh, little.
Barbara Dunkelman
Which means hurry up.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, yeah. Gunther jumps off from the tree, says, we're under attack. Arrows take cover.
Gustavo Sorola
What is the household chore that you most like to avoid? Void.
Chris Demarais
I was gonna say more questions.
Gustavo Sorola
That was good.
Jon Risinger
Oh, my God. Are we gonna fight you?
Barbara Dunkelman
Gus, the arrow shooter.
Chris Demarais
He's 50ft tall.
Barbara Dunkelman
Did any of us see that arrow fly by?
Gustavo Sorola
I would say probably not, because you all are focused on the ground. This is up in the trees.
Chris Demarais
But Gunther did alert us to it, though.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Okay, I think we gotta form up.
Gustavo Sorola
As Gunther drops down to the ground, several gnolls appear out of the the tree trunks in the area and begin menacingly approaching you with one of them, brandishing an ax, saying, give us all your gold.
Jon Risinger
Howdy.
Chris Demarais
Are we gonna have to find out next week if we actually get out of this?
Gustavo Sorola
No.
Chris Demarais
Hand it over now or I'll cut you to ribbon right now.
Barbara Dunkelman
No, I don't think. I don't think we will.
Jon Risinger
You just hear from the bonfire area, a little toddler hacking up gold he'd been eating.
Blaine Gibson
I'm a croak, folk. We do not value gold in the same way that you do. But what I can offer you are these pebbles.
Barbara Dunkelman
Very valuable pebbles.
Jon Risinger
Natty holds up her hands and like a. Like open palms and just goes like. See? We don't got any gold. And then Natty shoots an eldritch blast.
Gustavo Sorola
All right, go ahead and see if that hits for me, Natty.
Jon Risinger
Okay. Yeah, that's a Nat 20. Oh, my God.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Yeah.
Jon Risinger
Roll for damage.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Plus a bonus die because he rolled a nat 20.
Jon Risinger
Oh, yeah.
Gustavo Sorola
Okay, well, the bonus one is at.
Jon Risinger
Max damage, so the D10 is the die. Yeah, so I rolled a 9 plus 10 plus a 3. That's the damage. Plus they get pushed back 10ft and take an extra 3 damage. So 25 damage.
Chris Demarais
Rest in peace, gnoll.
Gustavo Sorola
You hit this gnoll with the axe who's menacing you with the eldritch blast, and it pushes them back 10ft and they just like disintegrate and fall to pieces from the absolute force of the blast.
Blaine Gibson
Gunther makes a mental note not to threaten Natty.
Jon Risinger
Natty then squares her hands towards the other guy and says, who else wants to meet my wife?
Gustavo Sorola
They all look at each other and then look at you and then turn around and run away.
Blaine Gibson
Did any of them pass through an attack of opportunity?
Gustavo Sorola
No.
Blaine Gibson
Okay.
Chris Demarais
Well, guys, welcome to our new camp. Way to go, Daddy.
Barbara Dunkelman
Do you think if we maybe do like a rest or anything like that one of us, us, we should, like, do like, shifts? Because I'm worried they might try to come back?
Blaine Gibson
Absolutely.
Chris Demarais
I would say you guys get some shut eye and I could take first watch.
Blaine Gibson
Can we check the packs that we're sitting here abandoned?
Chris Demarais
Oh, good call.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, you open one up and it's just stuffed with straw.
Blaine Gibson
Ah, look, there is enough straw for all of us.
Jon Risinger
I'm going to let you keep all that, Gunther.
Chris Demarais
You can take my share, Gunther. That's cool.
Blaine Gibson
This is great feed for animals.
Jon Risinger
Natty sets up for a sleep.
Gustavo Sorola
All right. And Tolv, you have first watch. Is anyone going to relieve Tolv or is Tolve going to watch the whole night?
Barbara Dunkelman
I'll take second watch.
Chris Demarais
Do we need a roll for those or can we also log along or ask?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, you can go ahead and log them, Natty. You fall asleep and you open your eyes awake, half buried in sand. No sun, no moon, no stars. Only blackness that gradually meets a horizon of dim, purple black sand. Dunes ripple with labyrinthian spirals and at the center of the spirals are small cairns. And between dunes are shallow streams of mist that continue on past the horizon. You feel like you're familiar with this place, Natty. It's kind of fuzzy, like as if you've been here in a dream. In the past, maybe.
Jon Risinger
Oh, I think I know where I am. Natty looks around for a familiar Face.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. You look around and you see a female centaur with a white coat and pale features trotting over silently. One eye dimly glows lavender and the other is pitch black. And she's dressed in a cloak of black sand.
Chris Demarais
You're the Janaya.
Gustavo Sorola
Take an inspiration. Die.
Jon Risinger
That's funny. Do I recognize this person?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah, it's, it's your wife, sugar pie. She, she, she looks at you and she conjures an hourglass of black sand that flips over and begins falling. She says, oh, it's so great to see you. When did we last see each other?
Jon Risinger
I don't know. It's hard to keep track of time in this little here sand opelis you've got going on.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, so, so true. She peeks at the hourglass as the sand goes through. What was it that we talked about last time? I feel like it's on the tip of my tongue.
Jon Risinger
I think we were just talking about how Gigi's. He's faring with his, his growing up.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, Giggy.
Blaine Gibson
How is he doing, that little rascal?
Jon Risinger
He got his first ax.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, I wish I had seen it.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, I'm sure it's one of many. Okay.
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, yes, I've been busy and received so many spirits from you as of late. They are going to make great additions. Some more than others.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, I've been trying to, I've been trying to send people your way whenever I can.
Gustavo Sorola
She smiles a big smile. Oh, how I tire of all of this. It's the waiting, isn't it? I long for that glorious day to come.
Jon Risinger
I mean, you know, the, the journey is part of the fun.
Blaine Gibson
I have to remind myself of that.
Gustavo Sorola
It's just I long for all of this to be over. And she points around.
Jon Risinger
Yeah, where's that go ahead happen, you know?
Gustavo Sorola
Oh, I, I, I don't know yet. She looks over at the hourglass again. And you look as well. And you see that it's nearly empty. Do you have any parting words for your wife?
Jon Risinger
Oh, have you been getting my messages?
Gustavo Sorola
She smiles big and says, I have. And as she says that, you sink into the black sand once more. And you wake up.
Jon Risinger
Okay.
Chris Demarais
Naughty, naughty, naughty, naughty, naughty, naughty.
Gustavo Sorola
To.
Barbara Dunkelman
Been watching her.
Chris Demarais
You look like you're having a nightmare. Are you okay? It's morning.
Jon Risinger
Oh, hey, To. No, I had a great night.
Chris Demarais
Sorry. Mike, I want you to put an alarm clock with.
Gustavo Sorola
I picture, like, Natty opens her eyes and it's just to like an inch away from her face.
Jon Risinger
Like, face to face.
Gustavo Sorola
Not touching her Anything?
Barbara Dunkelman
Just yelling and staring.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah. Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Hello.
Jon Risinger
How you sleep to?
Chris Demarais
It's morning, you know, I had a decent rest. I'm feeling a hundred percent again. Ready to rage, ready to take on the day.
Barbara Dunkelman
Yeah.
Chris Demarais
Ready to potentially hand off my leadership role. Yeah. I think I've completed my watch a.
Barbara Dunkelman
Whole half a day. Huh.
Chris Demarais
Should I keep going? I don't know.
Jon Risinger
Good blade. Don't be blamed. Don't be blamed.
Gustavo Sorola
That's a command decision I think I.
Chris Demarais
Only had over, what, two episodes?
Jon Risinger
You're fine, dude. Do you. Do you.
Chris Demarais
Yeah, I'll pass the baton.
Barbara Dunkelman
Wwtv. What would tol do?
Chris Demarais
What would to do to. Yeah, I think that that's enough in the event that we end up going, like, for multiple days because it makes sense. Because if Natty had it for like half of a day and then I took over for the rest of the day, then we could pass it for you guys for the next day.
Jon Risinger
Don't overthink it. I think toll feeling like he to pass it on sounds like a told move.
Gustavo Sorola
Just go for it. No bad decisions. No wrong decisions.
Chris Demarais
I'm going to wake up. Dog, dog, dog, dog, dog.
Barbara Dunkelman
Hello to Doug is like, wide awake, staring at him as he's doing this the whole time.
Chris Demarais
I shake Doug's hand and I say, hello, new leader, Leo.
Barbara Dunkelman
Me?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Barbara Dunkelman
Wow. I guess that I will. I will be up for the challenge leader to. I mean, subordinate to.
Chris Demarais
Okay, nice. Salute you.
Blaine Gibson
Salute yourself.
Barbara Dunkelman
All right, team, what do we see? What do we see during the night? Anybody see anything suspicious or anyone try to come back to camp at any point?
Gustavo Sorola
I would say from the people who were on watch, their perspective, nothing seemed to have happened. It was a quiet night.
Chris Demarais
Peaceful night.
Blaine Gibson
Did we get a long rest just to confirm?
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
Okay.
Chris Demarais
No, Doug. I think also over the night, I think we leveled up. Right, guys? Right.
Gustavo Sorola
Y'all have accomplished so many of your mission objectives.
Jon Risinger
I think now that we're all rested, we should take advantage of this. This vim and vigor. We've been gifted and head to our. Our. The Eldridge bay and Eldridge bay. Sorry, I got Eldridge.
Barbara Dunkelman
That's why you're not delo anymore.
Jon Risinger
That's true. That's true.
Blaine Gibson
Boom.
Chris Demarais
Got her.
Blaine Gibson
While. While we were doing our watch, could Gunther have gotten that axe from Diggy and replaced it with one of his own axis, like hand axes?
Gustavo Sorola
I mean, we'll have to maybe make some rolls for that. I don't know. Like, I feel like Jiggy's pretty attached to it at this point.
Blaine Gibson
He might have been, like, sleeping with it.
Gustavo Sorola
Yeah.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah, okay.
Jon Risinger
It's like his new teddy bear.
Chris Demarais
I just didn't know if we.
Blaine Gibson
If we were supposed to, because we were supposed to leave it somewhere. So that's why I was on the.
Gustavo Sorola
Way back in my mind, because you all want it so much. Giggy is now, like, clamped onto it and, like, it's still in recent memory. It's like, maybe if you give it time, it'll fade. But now I think giggy is, like, all over that thing. All right, what's the move, Doug?
Barbara Dunkelman
All right, I think we continue west to Endwage Bay.
Gustavo Sorola
That's it. You press on through the brush and shrubs for another hour or two, and the piercing rainfall and harsh winds continually pelt your faces. Thunder booms and lightning pierces the sky. But another sound follows. A stormy soundscape. The lapping of water against wood. The rough gravel and weedy dirt slowly gives way to damp sand and briny seaweed. After detours fraught with demons and demigods, you finally reach your destination. Enridge Bay.
Barbara Dunkelman
See, it turns out Doug just had to lead us the whole time.
Chris Demarais
Where'd it go, Doug?
Gustavo Sorola
Find out what Doug's next command decision is on the next episode of Tales from the Sneaky Dragon.
Jon Risinger
New location.
Gustavo Sorola
Pew, pew, pew.
Barbara Dunkelman
Doug immediately hands off leadership.
Blaine Gibson
Doug did it.
Jon Risinger
All right, that's it. End on a high note.
Gustavo Sorola
Find out if that really happens next time. Thanks for listening, everyone. Hey, everyone, thanks for listening to this podcast. Don't forget to check out store.stinkydragonpod.com for all your stinky merch needs. We've got a council of barbarians tee. It's all your favorite barbarians on one t shirt. We've also got the stinky spring collection 25. We've got a vintage dusty dragon tee, Prestidigitation spelling tea. I love that one. I love all of them. A vibe check hat and more. New episodes of Tales from the Stinky Dragon premiere every other Wednesday wherever you stream podcasts and on the Stinky Dragon YouTube channel channel. Want to listen to the show 48 hours early and ad free? Become a patron@stinky dragonpod.com or become a member of Beacon at Beacon TV. Both memberships support the show and receive access to our exclusive bonus series, Second Wind and a member only Discord for their respective platform. Become a patron, you get access to even more exclusive bonus content, the Stinky Dragon community Discord events. And you can get your name shouted out just like Guarev, who's at Jigsy Jeremiah at Jerry 0 Jerry 8 Jerry thought of Jerry's mom of Turton Fizz, Halmonder, Hilmerson, and finally Cayman Diamenta. These patrons directly support the show and get ad free episodes, access to our patronly Discord server, bonus content like Second Wind and Behind the Screen and much more. In fact, here's a quick peek from last week's Second Wind.
Jon Risinger
Talk to me about the episode. Talk to me about preacher Reggie. Talk to me about Private Parts being strapped to a leather table with iron strap.
Blaine Gibson
Well, first of all, Greggy, as he's known by his close friends, what do you think his deal was?
Jon Risinger
Was he like, yeah, we never did figure that out.
Blaine Gibson
Was there a version where he.
Chris Demarais
There's nothing creepier than like us going down a hallway in a cave and a guy saying, you want to purify.
Jon Risinger
The world, you know, like, yeah.
Chris Demarais
So I think he was probably gonna always be friendly. But we just were left with that first encounter to simmer on for a week, thinking we were about to die. I don't.
Blaine Gibson
I wonder if they were lying whenever they said they hadn't seen the Baron and Private Parts pass by. Because we asked and they said they hadn't.
Jon Risinger
Good chance sense.
Blaine Gibson
Yeah. But then we continued along that way.
Chris Demarais
But I think no matter how you swing it, you would have had to have passed by Reggie to get there. So either we found a continuity issue with Mike and Gus or Reggie lied.
Jon Risinger
Technically, if my map is correct, which now I'm doubting my own map. When we were in the room with the. The two different kinds of wind symbols, the. The one that was like on the. The Made with chains and one that was on the coin. There were three exits that went up around that bend. One was the one that went to the spatula room that then led to the Private Parts torture chamber. One was the one Private Parts torture chamber.
Chris Demarais
Listen, it was like some like red light district establishment.
Gustavo Sorola
Again, stinkydragonpod.com we can't thank you enough for your support that lets us make this show. Listeners who interacted with us on the Stinky Dragon Discord had NPCs named after them in this episode. Like Keep a Bucky, named after Trex, voiced by kyla Cook at DefinedByKai from Same Brain TV. Murphin Bakerson, named after Hugh Mann, voiced by Beth May at hey, Beth May from the Dungeons and Daddies Podcast. PI a la Mode, named after Andrew Lamont, voiced by Ashley McNew at smashree on Instagram. The Baron, named after Shieldmaiden, voiced by Hannah McCarthy at hi Hellohanna. Additional private private parts voiced by Ben Ernst at HalcyonBen. And Nighty's wife voiced by Jessica Vasami. Jessica Vasami on Instagram. There's like five A's in there. This week's error question was submitted by Crazy Mage5244. This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon is produced by Ben Ernst, written, edited and composed by Michael Risinger, with additional editing work by Katherine Arnold. Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales and the Stinky Dragon.
Chris Demarais
One watering can of this whistle witter. Let me try that again. One watering can of this whistle wetter.
Gustavo Sorola
God.
Chris Demarais
One watering can. Previously, our adventurers ran into Reggie the imprudent preacher. I'm just gonna this all up.
Gustavo Sorola
I'm never doing this again.
Tales from the Stinky Dragon - Episode 13: "Mission Through Middrus - Weekend at Baronie’s"
Release Date: March 19, 2025
Tales from the Stinky Dragon, hosted by Stinky Dragon, is an award-winning actual-play Dungeons & Dragons comedy podcast that brings to life the adventures of four friends and their patient dungeon master, Gustavo Sorola. In Episode 13, titled "Mission Through Middrus - Weekend at Baronie’s," the adventurers embark on a daring mission through the enigmatic lands of Middrus, facing comical challenges, navigating intricate plots, and interacting with a cast of quirky characters.
The episode opens with the adventurers reflecting on recent exploits, including the sale of a car to Carvana and humorous banter about various mundane activities. This light-hearted start sets the tone for the comedic elements interwoven throughout their epic quest.
Notable Quote:
Gustavo begins by recapping their last encounter where the adventurers faced Reggie the Imprudent Preacher. Reggie was attempting to sway spectators into dubious endeavors, leading to a confrontation where the team saved a soldier from a devil wielding an axe. This heroic act left the Baron incapacitated, setting the stage for the current mission.
Notable Quote:
Gustavo introduces the episode's central mission: interrogating the incapacitated Baron to uncover the mystery of the "Pathfinder." To engage the players, he incorporates an interactive segment called "Arrow Questions," where characters reveal personal quirks and preferences.
Notable Quote:
Character Responses:
The adventurers begin questioning the Baron about the elusive Pathfinder. Their attempt to extract information reveals the Pathfinder's significance and its connection to the Wind Trader, an important figure in their quest.
Notable Quote:
As the interrogation progresses, the team realizes the Pathfinder controls directions, making the search particularly challenging.
Notable Quote:
The team's journey is punctuated by interactions with NPCs like Murphin and Kiba, members of the Chase Chain faction working in the silver mine. These encounters are filled with witty dialogue and strategic challenges, including combat with gnolls—ferocious creatures demanding gold from the adventurers.
Combat Highlight:
Notable Quote:
Navigating the labyrinthine silver mine, the adventurers uncover abandoned campsites and skeletal remains, hinting at past conflicts and the mine's dark history. Doug discovers gold pieces in a knoll skeleton's purse, leading to further exploration and potential traps.
Notable Quote:
Their exploration culminates in reaching Enridge Bay, a pivotal location in their mission, filled with natural challenges like torrential rain and harsh winds.
Notable Quote:
Amidst the adventure, Natty experiences a poignant moment with her centaur wife, Janaya, adding emotional depth to the narrative. This encounter juxtaposes the comedic elements with heartfelt storytelling, enriching the overall experience.
Notable Quote:
As the team approaches Enridge Bay, they face a final confrontation with gnolls demanding their gold. Natty's strategic use of magic effectively neutralizes the threat, allowing the adventurers to advance.
Notable Quote:
The episode concludes with the adventurers preparing to leave Middrus, having achieved their mission objectives and setting their sights on future adventures in Enridge Bay. Gustavo hints at upcoming challenges and the evolving dynamics within the team, leaving listeners eager for the next installment.
Notable Quote:
“Sell your car to Carvana and swap hassle. For convenience, pick up.” – Gustavo Sorola ([00:22])
“Previously, our adventurers ran into Reggie the imprudent preacher trying to soothsay and sway spectators into something silver or pure.” – Chris Demarais ([02:11])
“This week's arrow question is, what household chore does your character try to avoid?” – Gustavo Sorola ([03:27])
“I don't avoid any household chores... It brings a little spark of joy in my brain when I complete them.” – Jon Risinger as Natty Wonder ([05:01])
“Doug doesn't like cleaning the toilet, but a little… maybe TMI for the group.” – Barbara Dunkelman ([13:07])
“What or who or where is the Pathfinder? You keep asking about that. We ain't got no idea what you're talking about.” – Jon Risinger ([20:01])
“I seek the Pathfinder. So I seek the Pathfinder.” – Gustavo Sorola ([20:01])
“I am going to roll for attack... 25 damage.” – Jon Risinger ([89:21])
“There seems to be another gold piece over there just out in the open. But it seems a little suspicious.” – Barbara Dunkelman ([81:27])
“You finally reach your destination. Enridge Bay.” – Gustavo Sorola ([66:07])
“I have a lot of work to do... I long for that glorious day to come.” – Janaya ([93:26])
“See? We don't got any gold.” – Natty Wonder ([88:59])
“We got a couple of gnolls that are menacingly approaching you with one of them, brandishing an ax, saying, give us all your gold.” – Gustavo Sorola ([88:25])
“Find out what Doug's next command decision is on the next episode of Tales from the Sneaky Dragon.” – Gustavo Sorola ([97:02])
Episode 13 of Tales from the Stinky Dragon masterfully blends humor with classic D&D storytelling, offering listeners a rich and engaging experience. The interplay between the adventurers, their strategic encounters, and the emotional undertones create a multifaceted narrative that caters to both seasoned D&D players and newcomers alike. As the team progresses toward Enridge Bay, the anticipation builds, promising even more thrilling and amusing adventures in future episodes.
For those who haven't listened yet, this episode is a testament to the podcast's ability to create immersive stories filled with laughter, camaraderie, and heroic deeds. Whether you're a seasoned Dungeon Master or new to the genre, Tales from the Stinky Dragon offers a delightful journey through fantastical realms that is perfect for all ages.