C03 - Ep. 21 - Slip of the Ship

Summary

Tales from the Stinky Dragon
Episode: C03 - Ep. 21 - "Slip of the Ship"
Release Date: July 9, 2025

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Episode Overview

In "Slip of the Ship," the adventuring party of Tales from the Stinky Dragon finds themselves commandeering a vessel in pursuit of the elusive Seadrinker. As they navigate exotic waters and encounter enigmatic characters, the episode delves into themes of trust, teamwork, and the ever-present tension between camaraderie and impending danger. With immersive soundscapes and a comedic twist, this episode seamlessly blends high-stakes adventure with lighthearted banter, making it a standout installment in the series.

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Plot Summary

[02:00] The episode kicks off with Dungeon Master Gustavo Sorolla setting the scene aboard the commandeered ship. The party—Natty Wonder (played by John Riesinger), Gunther, Tolv, and Doug Boone (Ironclad)—are under pressure from a privateer demanding stolen prisoners and a map. A hasty portal plan leads to their commandeering the ship, thrusting them into a nautical adventure.

As they fend off the privateer's gas attacks [15:36], the crew faces significant damage and health loss. Doug Boone valiantly attempts to save himself, demonstrating heroic qualities under duress [16:07], while Gunther and Natty grapple with their own diminishing health. The tension heightens when a giant tidal wave approaches, symbolizing the escalating dangers of their quest.

During a moment of respite [26:10], the party decides to take a long rest, exploring below deck where they encounter two mysterious prisoners, Mimir and Bethesda, who claim to be wrongfully imprisoned due to a prank gone awry [28:00]. Skepticism arises as Natty attempts to read their thoughts but senses an eerie emptiness [29:25]. After deliberation, the adventurers decide to release them, providing a rowboat and some rations [42:29], fostering potential new alliances despite lingering mistrust.

The narrative takes a supernatural turn when a phantom ship emerges amidst a severe storm, invoking primal fears and altering the characters' perspectives [57:00]. This spectral vessel, sailing toward them with an ominous presence, leaves the party shaken and influenced by inexplicable emotions, turning them temporarily against violence [65:34].

In a heartfelt subplot, Gunther and Doug Boone engage in forging stronger bonds and enhancing their gear, aided by Natty's magical abilities [75:00]. This character development intertwines seamlessly with the main plot, highlighting themes of unity and personal growth.

The climax approaches as Ironclad's ship, Der Drost, arrives, leading to a confrontation that culminates in both ships being pulled into a violent whirlpool [102:52]. The episode concludes on a cliffhanger, leaving listeners yearning for the next chapter of their perilous journey.

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Character Interactions

• Natty Wonder (John Riesinger)
  "I'm a drow warlock drag queen. Make sure to throw that in there, people. People need to remember there's a queen in this party." [03:39]
  Natty's vibrant persona adds a unique flair to the group dynamics, balancing the tension of their adventures with humor and charisma.

• Tolv
  "I'm still caught up on the TLC show about Natty's because it's just... make waves into the Stinky Dragon and drink up our latest Leaf Juice Genie." [01:36]
  Tolv provides comedic relief and quirky insights, enhancing the group's chemistry.

• Doug Boone (Ironclad)
  "I think the idea of starting your own garden and being able to grow these beautiful things and things you could eat, you've got to be really precise about how you do it." [10:15]
  Doug's practical outlook and technical skills are pivotal in overcoming the challenges the group faces.

• Gustavo Sorolla (Dungeon Master)
  Guides the narrative with engaging descriptions and maintains the comedic tone, ensuring a lively and immersive experience.

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Key Moments & Notable Quotes

• Privateer's Attack and Gas Assault
  "They forget quickly that I've been on this ship before. Come with me. I'll need those raging muscles of yours." [12:16]
  Doug's quick thinking and leadership shine as the party confronts unexpected dangers.

• Discovery of Mimir and Bethesda
  "I'm the artificial bugbear currently at level five. And, you know, I've thought a lot about retirement..." [09:43]
  Introducing new characters adds depth and potential for future storylines.

• Encounter with the Phantom Ship
  "You know that whatever it was you just saw that wasn't from this world. It's not right." [62:07]
  The supernatural elements heighten the episode's tension and mystery.

• Forging and Enhancements
  "I just love a good lead up." [36:33]
  The collaborative efforts to enhance gear underscore the importance of teamwork.

• Climactic Whirlpool Confrontation
  "What a smart and wise leader you were all very lucky to have." [41:29]
  The sudden whirlpool serves as a dramatic turning point, leaving the fate of the characters uncertain.

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Insights and Discussions

• Trust and Skepticism
  The decision to release Mimir and Bethesda reflects the delicate balance between trust and caution, a recurring theme that questions when to extend help and when to remain guarded.

• Supernatural Influence
  The appearance of the phantom ship and the subsequent emotional shifts highlight the ever-present influence of the unknown in their quest, challenging the characters' resolve and strategies.

• Character Development
  Moments of downtime reveal deeper layers of each character, such as Natty's magical abilities and Doug's meticulous nature, fostering a stronger connection between the audience and the protagonists.

• Humor Amidst Chaos
  The lighthearted banter and comedic mishaps provide levity, making the intense moments more impactful and relatable.

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Conclusions

"Slip of the Ship" masterfully intertwines high-stakes adventure with rich character interactions and comedic elements, maintaining a balance that keeps listeners engaged from start to finish. The episode effectively sets the stage for future developments, with unresolved tensions and emerging alliances promising exciting forthcoming episodes. As the party faces both internal and external challenges, their journey remains as unpredictable as it is entertaining, embodying the spirit of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

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Notable Quotes with Attribution and Timestamps:

• Natty Wonder (John Riesinger):
  "I'm a drow warlock drag queen. Make sure to throw that in there, people." [03:39]

• Tolv:
  "I'm still caught up on the TLC show about Natty's because it's just... make waves into the Stinky Dragon and drink up our latest Leaf Juice Genie." [01:36]

• Doug Boone (Ironclad):
  "They forget quickly that I've been on this ship before. Come with me. I'll need those raging muscles of yours." [12:16]

• Elva (Chris Damaris):
  "Yes, I've had loss, but I have more to live for. So that's why I must hurry and accomplish what I need to so I can see them again." [84:33]

• Gunther:
  "I believe in you. And a..." [81:03]

• Doug Boone (Ironclad):
  "I can definitely figure that one out. You got it." [75:02]

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Key Takeaways:

• The episode emphasizes the importance of teamwork and trust within the adventuring party.
• Supernatural and mysterious elements introduce new challenges and deepen the plot.
• Character development is interwoven with the main narrative, providing depth and relatability.
• Humor serves as a counterbalance to the high-stakes environment, enhancing the overall storytelling experience.

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For those new to Tales from the Stinky Dragon, "Slip of the Ship" offers a compelling blend of adventure, humor, and character-driven storytelling, making it an excellent entry point into the series.

Transcript

[Natty Wonder]

Buying a car in Carvana was so.

[Doug Boone]

Easy, I was able to finance it through them.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I just.

[Doug Boone]

Whoa, wait. You mean finance? Yeah, Finance. Got pre qualified for a Carvana auto.

[Natty Wonder]

Loan, entered my terms and shot from.

[Doug Boone]

Thousands of great car options, all within my budget.

[Gunther]

That's cool.

[Doug Boone]

But financing through Carvana was so easy. Financed, done. And I get to pick up my car from their Carvana vending machine tomorrow.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Financed, right?

[Natty Wonder]

That's what they said.

[Doug Boone]

You can spend time trying to pronounce.

[Natty Wonder]

Financing, or you can actually finance and buy your car today on Carvana financing.

[Doug Boone]

Subject to credit approval. Additional terms and conditions may apply. With the Venmo debit card, you can Venmo everything. Your favorite band's merch. You can Venmo this or their next show. You can Venmo that. Visit Venmo Me Debit to learn more. The Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp bank and a pursuant to license by MasterCard International, Inc. The card may be used everywhere MasterCard is accepted. Venmo purchase restrictions apply. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Knowing you could be saving money for the things you really want, like that dream house or ride, is a great feeling. That's why the State Farm Personal Price Plan can help you save when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.

[Tolv]

Merry meetings all you marids make waves into the Stinky Dragon and drink up our latest Leaf Juice Genie.

[Gunther]

Meeny Miny Moe.

[Tolv]

It's a mixture of Misty Veil Matcha powder, created or destroyed cucumber water water blasted basil leaves and topped with an aquatic Flash lemon slice. One mouthful of this marine life mixer and you'll wish you had three more drinks. Not wishes.

[Gunther]

Three is all you get.

[Tolv]

Previously, our adventurers were acquainted with Elva Tol's Thaumatek sister. She dropped the disguise of Impostor Pancake and led B team in on her quiet quest to search for the Seadrinker. But their relative reunion was cut short with cannon fire. The privateer pressured the party to provide.

[Gunther]

His stolen prisoners and map.

[Tolv]

B Team blundered through a half baked portal plan, which ultimately climaxed in commandeering a ship. Latch onto our libation and let's leap into our lore.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Hello everyone. Welcome to Tales of the Sticky Dragon. I'm your Dungeon Master, Gustavo Sorolla. I'm gonna hit our four players with an arrow.

[Tolv]

A lot of coffee from Gus.

[Gunther]

That's not the sound that an arrow makes. They don't go pew, pew, pew.

[Elva]

Depends on there.

[Natty Wonder]

Can you give us a sound of an arrow, John?

[Tolv]

What was that?

[Natty Wonder]

It's actually good. That's actually really good.

[Gunther]

It's just air. That's all it is.

[Tolv]

Just looks like you guys are spitting on your microphones and they're now stinky.

[Gunther]

Maybe a twang. Maybe a twang of the. Of the.

[Natty Wonder]

Hit the target.

[Gunther]

I'm blanking on. What's the. What's the rope part?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The thread. Okay, this week's arrow question. It's never too early to think of the future. What are your retirement plans? And that's submitted by faberd. Rolling Roll Initiative. Yeah, let's. Let's get this. Let's get this ball rolling. Let's get this party rolling. Yes, I have had a lot of coffee blame to answer your earlier question.

[Tolv]

Thank you for confirming one eleven tree.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, so got Natty first with a seventeen. Gunther second with an eleven twelve, third with a three. And finally, bring it up the rear. Doug with a one.

[Ironclad]

Doug with a one and twos.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right, Natty, why don't you lead us off?

[Gunther]

Hello, everybody. I'm John Riesinger and I play Natty Wonder, the drow warlock drag queen. Make sure to throw that in there, people. People need to remember there's a queen in this party. Okay, Work diva.

[Natty Wonder]

Thank you.

[Gunther]

On the topic of retirement plans, I'm going to be honest, I haven't really put a lot of thought. Retirement plans, which I think is sometimes kind of common with people. It's hard to think that forward. But I think in my particular instance, once I became the mother of what will soon be the bringer of the apocalypse, I figure that's my job. Until he does his job, which will be the end of all things. I need to worry about retirement. So that's my plan.

[Natty Wonder]

Plan is.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No plan is for your child to end the world. Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

What a beautiful ending is.

[Gunther]

It's a natural order to things. Everything has to end. Can you name anything that never ends? No, you can't. Because that's not how stuff works. Time.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

That story from the 80s.

[Gunther]

Time will end at some point.

[Natty Wonder]

I see everything.

[Gunther]

Nothing is infinite.

[Natty Wonder]

Or this is the song that.

[Ironclad]

I.

[Natty Wonder]

Hate it 90s kids, remember?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. Sounds like a single mother drag queen raising a child that'll bring about the apocalypse. Sounds like a great show on tlc. I will watch. Thank you, Natty, for letting us know your retirement plans. Up next, we Have Gunther.

[Elva]

Hello, I'm Chris Damaris playing the Gunther.

[Natty Wonder]

The male croak folk playing the Gunther.

[Tolv]

The Gunther.

[Elva]

And for my retirement, I have one of two plans. One is to go and back with hopefully see my wife and kids again and grow old with them and upraise them and become a grand crow folk. And then the other is death.

[Natty Wonder]

Oh, wow. I sense a theme here.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's very practical, morbid party.

[Elva]

Well, if I do not achieve one, then I will achieve the other.

[Tolv]

I'm still caught up on the TLC show about Natty's because it's just. It's like the show after the Secret lives of Mormon Wives would be the drag queen raising the Antichrist.

[Gunther]

Essentially I will just call it the gay agenda.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

So Gunther, I do want to point out you can achieve both of those goals if you want. I know you said one or the other. Yeah, well, one is inevitable.

[Gunther]

The one one before the other. You can't do it the other way.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

That's very true.

[Elva]

Yes. As far as we know, the order is very important to me.

[Tolv]

And how many kids does Gunther have currently?

[Elva]

Well, a lot.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, thanks Gunther. You know, we're halfway through this Arrow question. I hope that we can proceed without someone talking about death being their retirement plan. Okay, up next we got Tolv.

[Tolv]

Yoo hoo. Yeah, it's me, Tove, talking about retirement. You know, to be honest, I do not know the life expectancy of a thaumatech, which is what I am. Surprise, surprise if you are like skipping ahead three episodes. Wow. What have you doing? You just missed all of this. Cool story.

[Gunther]

We haven't asked yet. Do you have a warranty?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No.

[Natty Wonder]

That's a good question.

[Gunther]

No warranty plan. Okay.

[Tolv]

I don't know. Don't objectify me, Natty slash John.

[Gunther]

You just said I don't know how long I last. You brought up the topic of breaking down. I was wondering if you got a plan for how to get fixed up.

[Tolv]

I do not know. You are asking me questions that are out of my understanding. I don't know.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Ironclad. Didn't want to spring the extra 15 bucks at checkout for the extended product protection plan.

[Tolv]

He's not. He did not get the best by Geek Squad extended coverage. So, anywho. Yeah, I think I'm just going to continue to work and I might explore different hobbies and make those jobs and you know, maybe take on different Personas. You know, like I can try out different looks, you know, why not? You know, in worst case scenario I break down and hopefully I Will become like some beautiful statue. You know, like, you could put me on top of a fountain and I just rust there, and birds can land on me and hopefully not poop on me.

[Natty Wonder]

I can't tell if that's, like, a potentially a form of torture to be just, like, trapped in a body that you are constantly, like, conscious and aware, but you can't move or do anything.

[Tolv]

Yeah, that is, like, the premise of the song I Am Iron man, you know, by Black Sabbath. That's like, totally what happens to him.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's also the Tin man from wizard of Oz.

[Tolv]

Yeah, but we do not talk about the Tin man because if you have not seen Vikid, he's such a jerky, jerky face. I do not associate with the Tin man. So.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, I've not seen Wicked. I'm learning something here.

[Tolv]

You know what? Also really quick for us, for our Patreon listeners, I just found a camera reel that was, like, 8 to 10 years old, and it's a picture of me from middle school. Like, so it's older than that. Dresses the Tin Man. I've never had photographic proof that I played the Tin man in middle school. I found it, and I think that's something I'll have to bring to Second Wind.

[Natty Wonder]

Do we ever talk about how you play the Tin Man? I played the Scarecrow in a camp play.

[Tolv]

We have talked about that.

[Gunther]

Yeah, but I have.

[Tolv]

I have visual proof. I'll show you guys and then. And get you guys hyped.

[Natty Wonder]

Maybe we could talk about it on Second Wind.

[Elva]

We will.

[Gunther]

Yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Which if you're unfamiliar, that's a. Another podcast we do just for people who support us over on our Patreon stinky. Dragonpod.com. if you support us, you can get access to Second Wind on top of many other special ability, special perks. There you go. Listen, I'm looking at a DND character sheet.

[Gunther]

This is why they script commercials.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Check it out. Sticky DragonPod.com. yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

Heck, yeah.

[Tolv]

Okay.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

That's me. Bye. Thank you, Cole.

[Tolv]

Oh, oh, also, I'm Blaine Gibson.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Sorry.

[Gunther]

Oh, he's apologizing for being Blaine Gibson.

[Tolv]

Yeah, that's my bad, guys. I'm sorry.

[Natty Wonder]

There you go.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Finally, we got Doug.

[Gunther]

Hello, everyone.

[Natty Wonder]

I am Barbara Dunkelman, and I play.

[Ironclad]

Doug Boone, the artificial bugbear currently at level five. And, you know, I've thought a lot about retirement, and there's, like, so many things you could do. You know, you could do bird watching. You could pick up a new hobby, you could travel. All these things sound pretty good. But, you know, I feel like Doug being someone who really likes to, like, build stuff and create stuff, I think I really want to get into, and I'm going to try to pronounce this as best I can. Gardening.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, gardening.

[Ironclad]

I think the idea of, like, you know, starting your own garden and, like, being able to grow these beautiful things and things you could eat, and you got to be really precise about how you do it. Everything requires different love and attention. I think it'd be really fun and, like, a good, good way to spend Doug's energy after, you know, when he's old and done his life's work.

[Tolv]

If you need, like, a scarecrow or someone to hold very still to scare off the birds, I know somebody.

[Ironclad]

No Tov. I think that would actually be the perfect pairing. When you retire into a statue, you could be my scarecrow.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Perfect.

[Tolv]

That sounds nice. I'll take a long nap.

[Gunther]

I honestly didn't think you were going to say garden. You were building that up, and I thought you were going to say that you were just going to get into trains.

[Ironclad]

Oh, miniature Twains, maybe. Doug already dabbles in the Twains, the choo. Choosing the such.

[Gunther]

We're going to find Doug's, like, childhood, like, room, and it's just going to be. That's all it is, is just like, 30 trains going around, but they're all, like, different directions. Yeah. You got to have your obsession.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

This is very off topic, and I promise I'll only talk about it very briefly. I learned of a train station in Hokkaido, Japan. It's kind of like rural out in the country, and they don't see many passengers anymore. So one of the things you can do if you go to that train station is you can stay in the train station. It's like a Airbnb kind of deal.

[Gunther]

That's awesome.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The station master will cook you food and, like, grill, like, barbecue out on the station platform for you.

[Gunther]

That's awesome.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. And I was like, man, I really want to do that. That sounds so cool.

[Gunther]

That's one of the main reasons I want to go to Japan, is that I am a trained kid, and I. Every time I hear about these special trains, the. The cat that's the conductor of the train station or the one that looks like the spirit away train. I'm like, I got to get on these trains.

[Tolv]

The ship is yours, Captain.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

At this point, Gunther, you help Doug to his feet, presumably, and Lascal walks over to you tolve. They pat you on the shoulder, reach into their pocket and pull out the map from earlier and ask, so, do.

[Tolv]

You know how to sail? Because it's time to sail to a missing island.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Overhead, the rain soaked pirate flag, your commandeered ship, flaps violently in the storm skies. It bears an insignia of a skull wearing a blindfold. And you hear a voice that yells from the port side, we have them.

[Tolv]

Where we want them.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Fire on the blindfold.

[Elva]

Over there to the starbow port side general area.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You look over and see the privateer screaming at the gnoll crew on an armored bowl shaped ship. Long spindly blades protrude from its railing. Spinning propellers are affixed at its bow and its stern, and the side of the hull reads the bow blade.

[Tolv]

But sir, is that ship a part of the Darkmaster fleet?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The privateer shoves a nearby gnoll aside.

[Tolv]

And yells, useless Gnoll rats.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

He grabs a corked vase, yanks a crank and throws the vase into a spinning propeller now aimed at your ship. The ceramic shatters to pieces and unleashes a cloud of greenish yellow gas blowing straight for you all. As it draws closer, Elva turns the futile.

[Doug Boone]

They forget quickly that I've been on this ship before. Come with me. I'll need those raging muscles of yours.

[Tolv]

Okay.

[Ironclad]

Yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

She makes a dash across the deck for the capstan.

[Doug Boone]

Clockwise changes how we look to them. Counterclockwise, shows them what they fear most. Your call, brother.

[Tolv]

I would say counterclockwise if we are going to try to scare them also. I'm so sorry, did I mishear them? Is their thing called the Beyblade? Are they going to let her rip?

[Ironclad]

I heard the same thing told.

[Tolv]

Yeah, like what is this, the 90s? You get to pull out Pokemon cards and a Yo yo as well.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, no, it's the bow blade. It's one of the three ships that are part of the Dark Master.

[Tolv]

What's the other one called? Like the Furby or the Furby.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, no, it's the Flying Eel. Of course.

[Gunther]

The blindfold, the bow blade and the flying eel.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, yeah.

[Gunther]

All right. That's what we're on. We're on. He says he's firing on us.

[Natty Wonder]

Okay.

[Gunther]

And our. Our flag has a blindfold on. On the. On the skull.

[Doug Boone]

Okay, so counterclockwise.

[Tolv]

Yeah.

[Doug Boone]

Okay. We're going to show them what they fear the most. What do you think that is, brother? What should we show them? What do they fear the most?

[Tolv]

I wonder if they are like ocean fairing, then I think like a giant squid would be very scary.

[Gunther]

Oh, you're gonna use the illusion thing that's that's what we are.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Tolv]

The blindfold.

[Ironclad]

What if you just showed them a vision of us winning? Is that something that would scale them the most?

[Tolv]

I mean, or like, like, maybe like.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

A. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

[Tolv]

How about a giant squid riding a surfboard board on a tidal wave?

[Gunther]

Wait, the giant squid is on a surfboard?

[Ironclad]

That's pretty cool.

[Tolv]

That's terrifying.

[Gunther]

That's a big surfboard.

[Elva]

It would be a very scary squid.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's going to hang a. Okay. Elva begins helping you you to. And you begin pushing the cap stand counterclockwise. And as you do so, that cloud of gas begins enveloping everyone, filling your lungs. So I need everyone to go ahead and make me a constitution save. Okay.

[Tolv]

Find it dandy.

[Elva]

11, 25 12.

[Gunther]

That's a 9 plus 3 12.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

This poisonous cloud of gas begins filling your lungs. Everyone begins coughing violently. Gunther, you say you only take 10 points of damage. Everyone else who fails takes 20 points of damage. You begin coughing violently.

[Ironclad]

Guys, I'm.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Doug. Begins coughing violently and then stops. He must be better. Yeah.

[Gunther]

That is very, very close to being down.

[Tolv]

I'm not doing so hot.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, I'm down. I'm completely down.

[Gunther]

All right.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

As Doug slides around on the deck, you see a giant tidal wave appear on the horizon and very quickly come closer and closer. And what is that on the tidal wave? Is that a longboard with a giant squid on top of it? Oh, no. It looks like it's getting closer and closer, and it's going to overtake the bow blade, which very quickly turns so that it's perpendicular to the wave, point it away from it to try to ride the wave out, which turns it away from you.

[Gunther]

All perfect. How do you. How do you put your foot on the gas?

[Tolv]

I give Elva the honors. It's been a bit since I've been at sea, so. So, Elva, let's use our ship boating experience and get us out of here.

[Doug Boone]

Okay, brother. Will do.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Elva begins pulling on ropes and instructing you tolve and you work together solidly as a team. It's just like the old days, you know, it's been a little while, but it comes back to you very quickly. But I just want to clarify something. I know in the last episode, we were referring to Natty as Captain Natty, but who is at the helm? Like, who's navigating? Who's running the ship here right now? Like, Natty Tov. Like, obviously not. Doug.

[Elva]

Take us. What is your orders, Doug? No, I believe I am the Squad captain, whatever you call it for army.

[Tolv]

So if you're squad captain and Natty is self declared captain and then there.

[Elva]

Is Captain Grumbles who is also right higher rank. I would go to Tolv who's like knows what he's doing. But if you know what you're doing, you shall take Captain. Captain.

[Tolv]

So we have three captains now. We have Captain Natty, Captain Grumbles and Captain Tolve. So you, you are giving me the. The mantle of responsibility, Captain Hood.

[Elva]

Yes. Because I have no never been at sea before. It is scary.

[Tolv]

Also look at the giant squid on observ.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Can a squid do a shaka? Is that possible? Like I know it's got like a tentacle tip at the end of its tentacle, but can it like fold it over, figure out a way to draw it and send it to us on our discord?

[Tolv]

Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

Hang in 10.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

How could there be three captains if we only have two hands? Like I could two. One captain's fine. Two captains, it's two salutes. But three captains, it's like it's one too many.

[Tolv]

Curtsy.

[Gunther]

You can salute the other two and curtsy to me.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

There you go.

[Gunther]

Me and Captain Grumbles, we're just captains in name only. Captain Grumbles ain't even alive anymore. And I, I just, I just did enough to give it get us this ship. I'm not in charge. I don't know what even any of this stuff is.

[Natty Wonder]

People have who have experience on their ship. Fanning the helm should take over asap.

[Tolv]

I want to be very clear though. Captain Natty has such a good ring to it and Captain Grumbles has been through so much. We cannot take his rank away. So how about I am admiral?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

To be clear, you all are in the army and I believe the title was actually team leader. I'm just, just reigning it back in.

[Gunther]

What these naval terms aren't part of the army. What are you talking about?

[Elva]

Gus, I will say that I admire you to told so Admiral. Makes sense.

[Tolv]

It's a good soldier. Okay, so you know, as 1/3 captain of the team, I nominate myself as Admiral and I say that we the squid brigade as we will now be known. You know, because you know, we, we were the B team, but we have so many extra members. So now I think we shouldn't be called the squid brigade.

[Gunther]

How many of the, how many of the masts have been shot while we talked about this?

[Natty Wonder]

I'm like, let's come on guys.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. All right. Private parts is writing all of this down furiously.

[Tolv]

Okay, let's get out of here, though. We should make our escape.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, you turn the ship towards the open sea and begin setting sail. Elva turns to you. Tol salutes and says, where are we heading to?

[Tolv]

Admiral Toll. Let me see. Where is my boy?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Laskul with that last kill, pulls out a map and points to three points on that map where they believe the island was last seen and says, we.

[Tolv]

Could head in this direction. Thank you, navigator. You have been.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You've.

[Tolv]

You've also been promoted. So we are going that way. We are going to save the sea drinker.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, okay.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You'll set sail, leaving land behind you. And it fades away slowly into the distance. And I assume at this point, someone tends to Doug and props him back up on his feet.

[Gunther]

I will try.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Not Captain Grumble style.

[Natty Wonder]

No, please don't reanimate me.

[Tolv]

Oh, no.

[Gunther]

He's not dead yet. He's incapacitated. I know what dead is. I've created it enough.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

What do you do, Natty? To try to tend to Doug, since.

[Gunther]

What took Doug down was noxious gas. I do the compressions to try to get that gas out of his lungs, but instead of doing it, staying alive. Although I know there's a new one. There's a new one that you're supposed. And there's like, it always was, like, do it to the rhythm of staying alive. And then they updated to another song. But actually Natty's gonna do it to nine to five, and it's just.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

So fast.

[Elva]

Often grumbles give mouth to mouth.

[Gunther]

No, I'm not mean.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's just the idea.

[Gunther]

Y' all want to be mean. Y' all want to be mean to each other. I just googled.

[Tolv]

So there are several certified CPR songs. Eye of the Tiger, Stronger by Britney Spears.

[Gunther]

I mean, there's.

[Tolv]

It goes on and on. Wannabe by the Spice Girls.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I guess, like every successive generation, you keep finding new songs to not people know staying alive.

[Gunther]

So they gotta, like, do another one.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. Okay, Doug. With a gasp, you fill your lungs with clean air and wake up and find yourself on the ship surrounded by your friends, with Natty beating furiously on your chest.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, I'm gonna say Captain Grumbles is probably nearby. Doug gets up with such force, he knocks. Captain Grumbles. Captain Grumbles, I think would then hit the side of the ship and maybe toss overboard.

[Gunther]

What are you trying to get rid of my captain?

[Natty Wonder]

I mean, I'm just. He was close by. He woke up with a fright.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Barbara, I appreciate the effort. And I'm gonna reward any opportunity to try to get rid of npc. So take a. Take an inspiration. Die.

[Tolv]

Man overboard.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, no.

[Ironclad]

Captain Guavos, I'm so sorry.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

He's not falling over this time. But take that inspiration. Die for the attempt. I appreciate it.

[Natty Wonder]

Metagaming wise, do I just regain one gp?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, you can sit at one. And we're about to get into some downtime as you all are traveling on. On the sea. So you'll be able to take, like, a long rest or a short rest or do whatever it is you need to do to try to recover some of that health.

[Gunther]

Hey, Doug. We're at the same level hp, Natty.

[Ironclad]

I've never felt more connected to you in my whole life.

[Gunther]

I say we just. We hang out, like, below deck for a little bit until that man says we can take a rest.

[Ironclad]

You know, I think Maddie, I think I. I might have seen your wife briefly.

[Natty Wonder]

Beautiful.

[Gunther]

I'm kind of jealous. Hey, smack me real hard real quick. Maybe I'll get sear for a second.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

That raises an interesting point, what you just said.

[Ironclad]

There.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

There is a lower deck that you all have not explored yet. So, really, like I said, said we're going to be in a downtime. So if you want to explore the ship, if there's something you want to do, if there's, like, objectives or things you want to do in this downtime, you know, let me know. This is a good time to try to kind of explore and build out those things.

[Tolv]

Now that all of my secrets are out, all of my skellingtons have been thrust out of the closet. I can admit to so many new things. Like, if I were to take a rest, I have this thing called sentinel shut eye. I don't sleep. You know, this entire time where we've been sleeping in. Been in bunk beds, I've just been watching you sleep the entire night. All three of you. Is that fun?

[Elva]

Goodness.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Is that why back in the first episode, you wanted to sleep in your own bunk, separate from everyone?

[Tolv]

Yeah, because I just like to sit here and watch my party, make sure that they're all sleeping. Well, you know, I do. I want to say, though, Doug, I think you should look into a CPAP machine breathing. You snore very loudly. I'm just quite concerned.

[Ironclad]

Oh, well, you know, it's just. I think it's because I fall asleep on my back so often because these beds are really small, so. Trying to get comfortable, you know.

[Gunther]

Guys, don't you sleep with one of those?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I Do. It's great. I love it. Let me tell you, if you snore or you think you have apnea, go see a doctor about it because you don't know what real sleep is. You don't know what real sleep is until you get a cpap. I'm just saying.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah. Take care of yourself.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's important. Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

I think Doug would spend some time sleeping and actually like resting because he's badly hurt and probably wants to regain a little bit of his health. And also some of his spells and whatnot that he's explaining what is Doug's.

[Gunther]

Self care routine, what recenters and rejuvenates little Doug.

[Ironclad]

I think honestly, Doug's not used to being on the wado, but back when Doug would stay home, he. He always dreamed of. Of being near the ocean. So he made a little machine that would make these like ocean sounds on it to help him sleep. So I think right now, being in a boat with natural ocean sounds, he's. He's out. He's out like a light.

[Natty Wonder]

But metagame wise, I guess, is it. Am I able to take a long rest or is that something that we might not have time for?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, why not?

[Elva]

Are we all able to long rest or.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Well, I mean, you tell me, like whatever it is you want to do. What's your. What are you trying to do? If everyone rests, you know, who's driving the ship? Like who's at the helm?

[Gunther]

I have an activity that I would like to have some help from, but it's going to require the whole team, so I shall wait till. Doug.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Doug.

[Gunther]

Are you sure for Douglas or is it just Doug?

[Ironclad]

Oh, just Doug.

[Gunther]

Okay. Just Doug until Doug recuperates.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Elva]

Shall we do shifts, Admiral?

[Tolv]

Well, I will be staying above. Above deck with Elva because I miss her so dearly. So I will be doing my sentinel zone out thing with her and we'll be going in shifts, driving the ship and catching up while you guys go below deck and rest up.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You.

[Tolv]

You guys have been working so hard. You go. Squid crew. I command you to take a rest.

[Gunther]

Squid brigade.

[Tolv]

Squid brigade, whatever you are.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I already forgot it. Immediately.

[Gunther]

I already forgot it. I cl. I. I took a long rest. I need that.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I'll.

[Elva]

You see, I'll take a long rest.

[Tolv]

Same.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Elva]

Can I make sure.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I just.

[Elva]

I've noticed last skill has a tendency. I want to make sure that my stuff is. I'm sleeping on my supplies or under it.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, that raises a good question. Where are you all going to sleep? On the. On the Deck here.

[Natty Wonder]

Now I think I would go underneath. You said there was like a under below deck kind of area.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, there is a lower deck you can go down.

[Gunther]

Is it called a galley? No, that's where you eat. Quarters. Quarters.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Quarters I think is where you sleep.

[Gunther]

Yeah, that's where I want to sleep.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You go to the lower deck and as you walk below deck, Doug, you know it's kind of dark. There's very little illumination below deck. And you see two dark and dank jail cells. And the only exits you see are the stairs that ascend back up to the main deck. And there's a door at the bow and a door at the stern.

[Gunther]

Bow front? Stern back.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yes.

[Natty Wonder]

I'll do the stern.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right. You begin walking to the door at the stern when two creatures stand up and begin calling you over from the jail cells. Hey.

[Gunther]

Hey you.

[Doug Boone]

Oh no, you're not a gnoll. Let us out.

[Ironclad]

I'm just a visitor on this ship. But what did you guys do? Why are you in jail?

[Doug Boone]

I'm sure people say this all the time, but for us this. It really was just a misunderstanding.

[Ironclad]

Uh huh. Well, I mean I don't. This is awkward. I don't have a key or anything, so.

[Doug Boone]

I'm Mimur. What's your name?

[Gunther]

Mimur.

[Ironclad]

Ah, Doug. I'm Doug Boone.

[Doug Boone]

Nice to meet you. I'm Mimur. And over there, that's Bethesda.

[Ironclad]

Oh, big fan of your games.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Mimur is a dwarf and Bethesda is an elf.

[Natty Wonder]

Do they look familiar at all to me?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Make a wisdom check 21. No, they do not seem familiar to you?

[Natty Wonder]

Okay.

[Doug Boone]

Where did the privateer go? Where are the Gnolls? Are you here to rescue us?

[Ironclad]

No.

[Gunther]

I'm so glad Doug is the one who has to deal with this. Doug is my ideal candidate to awkwardly deal with this.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I use one of my new.

[Gunther]

Abilities to do some telepathy?

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, it's sense thoughts or read thoughts.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I don't know which one I should probably read.

[Gunther]

Give you a direct.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, I'm gonna do read thoughts on Mimir, the one talking to me.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

Maybe like to know what they actually did to get into those cells.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You use detect thoughts and reach out and try to scan Mimir's mind. But you don't hear anything or you don't sense anything. It's just totally blank. Oh huh. Like their mind is 100 empty.

[Natty Wonder]

Does that mean they're not real?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I don't know. You've never encountered this before? Normally whenever you, you know, detect thoughts on Someone. You hear something?

[Ironclad]

Okay, well, this is weird. You know, I'm getting kind of heebie jeebies from you guys, so just kind of. Maybe I'll circle back around and see what I can do to help next time I see you.

[Doug Boone]

No, don't go. We're so hungry. We've been trapped in here for so long.

[Gunther]

Oh.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Huh?

[Tolv]

Feed them, Doug. They are hungry.

[Natty Wonder]

I'm trying to think, like, what else I could do to maybe, like, talk to him more.

[Gunther]

Just talk to him more. Ask him questions. Have a conversation.

[Ironclad]

So I guess you. You said it was a misunderstanding while you're here, but, like, what. What did you actually do? Why did they bring you down? Why did they arrest you?

[Doug Boone]

I'll be honest with you, Doug. You seem like a nice guy.

[Ironclad]

Ma'. Am.

[Tolv]

He is.

[Doug Boone]

Like I said, it was purely a misunderstanding. Bethesda and I were playing a joke, and the crew took it the wrong way. We were playing pranks, and we applied some itching powder to the nulls, and then we pretended we were judging a null dancing competition. We thought it was hilarious. The crew was very upset.

[Natty Wonder]

No, I gotta say, that is actually a very funny prank.

[Tolv]

It is just a prank, bro.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, thank you.

[Natty Wonder]

Exactly.

[Doug Boone]

It's just a prank, bro.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I, like, do any type of, like, I don't. Like, an arcana check to see if they're, like, some type of illusions or something like that or.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I don't know, make me an arcana and a reality check. Perception check. No, not a reality.

[Natty Wonder]

Okay? Arcana is 6, and a perception option is 16.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Mimir does not appear to be an illusion. It appears that this is a dwarf standing right in front of you.

[Natty Wonder]

Okay, but Bethesda.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, Bethesda also appears to be 100% real. Bethesda hasn't said anything. You've just been talking to Meemer so far.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, that's true.

[Ironclad]

Well, so you say your buddy's name is Bethesda? Bethesda. Is he telling the truth? Is that what you guys did?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Just for reference, Mimir and Bethesda are both. She. They're both female.

[Ironclad]

Bethesda. You know, she was saying that this is what you guys did to get down here, but is that true? Is there anything else?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

So I'm gonna. I'm gonna. I'm gonna break the fourth wall and metagame with you a bit. The reason I haven't had Bethesda talking is she talks with an Italian accent, and I hate doing Italian accents. So bear with me here as. As Bethesda answers you so Excited.

[Gunther]

So happy.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's a true.

[Tolv]

Yes. Yes. We don't need to recast that. Let's just use the raw audio.

[Gunther]

Hello everybody. John Rising here to talk to you about business. I'm a business owner. I've started my own business in the last year. Well, I started my own. I did it with six other people. But one thing we couldn't predict when we started this whole shebang was how many different hats we all were going to have to wear to make this thing work. But I've got some good news. I got one hat you can pass off to someone else. And that someone else is your new business partner, Shopify. Shopify is fantastic. It's the commerce platform behind millions of businesses all around the world and 10% of all e commerce in the U.S. i mean they've even got people like Mattel using their product. It's pretty fantastic. So I want to let you know you can turn your big business idea into some real. You want to use Shopify and get them on your side. You can sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at shopify.com dragon that's right. If you go to shopify.com dragon you can get a little discount. You can start your business, make some money and you do that all once again by going to shopify.com dragon thanks y'.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All. Fees are everywhere. Whether it's like concert tickets, cleaning fees for weekend rentals, processing fees, convenience fees.

[Tolv]

What is that?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

A convenience fee? They hurt the most when you're down. That's why Chime offers fee free banking which means no monthly fees, no overdraft fees and no minimum balance fees. Sign up [e-mail] Dragon seems like fees like this are a real hurdle when you're trying to get ahead or save up. It just chips away little by little at whatever money you may have or you know you're trying to save. That's one of the benefits of fee free banking with Chime. Banks shouldn't cost money. I'll take right with Chime. No monthly fees, no overdraft fees, no minimum balance requirements. You can open your account in two [e-mail] dragon that's chime.com dragon Chime feels like progress.

[Doug Boone]

Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancor Bank NA or Stripe Bank. NA members FDIC Spot me Eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Timing depends on submission of payment file. Fees apply at out of network ATMs, bank ranking and number of ATMs according to US News and World Report. 2023 Chime checking account required at New Balance. We believe if you run, you're a.

[Gunther]

Runner.

[Doug Boone]

However you choose to do it. Because when you're not worried about doing things the right way, you're free to discover your way. And that's what running is all about. Run your [e-mail] running.

[Natty Wonder]

I'm trying to see here if there's anything in Detect thoughts where it's like you don't detect thoughts of certain types of creatures.

[Tolv]

Barbara, I think we need to know more about Bethesda and their life story and all the adventures that took them to get to this ship.

[Natty Wonder]

Full conversation, heart to heart with Bethesda for the rest of the episode. Right.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You know the beginning of 22 Jumps street when Channing Tatum's doing the Jeff character. My name Jeff. He doesn't want to talk at all.

[Ironclad]

Okay, Well, I don't know. I don't know if I could trust you guys. And I don't want to get in trouble because I don't want to be put in the jail cell. You know, that would be bad for me. And then if I'm trapped and I can't leto help you guys, you know, so.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, but I thought we were friends.

[Tolv]

Can tolve come down from the upper.

[Gunther]

Deck with Elva and.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Sure.

[Elva]

And could Gunther join?

[Tolv]

Sure.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And I just realized I didn't actually read their appearances to you. So like I said, Mimir's a dwarf and has a four sided face mask with different expressions on them. And is snake hipped.

[Elva]

What does that mean?

[Ironclad]

Hipped?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Describing someone with slender and mobile hips often used to suggest a lithe or graceful physique.

[Ironclad]

Okay.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Elva]

That's weird for a dwarf.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. And then Bethesda is also she her an elf and also wearing a face mask with different expressions on it. And she has blood red hair.

[Doug Boone]

Ooh.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I also be able to tell if the masks that they have were anything like the one that Elva was wearing?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

These are a lot more crude.

[Natty Wonder]

Okay, so it's not the same type of mask.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, this is not what it is. I'm just using this as an example. But like, you think about, like, the drama and comedy masks, where it's just like a very vague mask with an expression. It's a lot more like that. Where it's just like an expression as opposed to like impersonating a rubber Mission.

[Tolv]

Impossible kind of trickery mask.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Correct.

[Natty Wonder]

Gotcha.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. And then at this point, I guess we would Have Tolv and Gunther come down as well.

[Elva]

And we assume that Doug caught us up with what has been said.

[Ironclad]

Yeah. So. Hey, guys, quick recap. This is. This is Mimo. This is Bethesda. Bethesda has a beautiful voice. So I would highly recommend you. You talk to them a lot.

[Gunther]

Oh.

[Ironclad]

And they. They pulled this little prank, you know, and it's. That's why they're in here, and they're asking me to let them go, but I don't know, guys.

[Tolv]

So you guys want off of this ship? Is that right? You want out of the jail?

[Doug Boone]

Oh, yes, we would love to be out of jail.

[Tolv]

Okay. I mean, if we lend you guys, like, a rowboat, like one of the lifeboats, do they have those on this ship?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Tolv]

Okay. Would that be sufficient? Would you guys be able to get home with that?

[Doug Boone]

Oh, yes. That would be wonderful.

[Tolv]

Okay. Yeah. The way you're talking, Doug, do we trust these fools? I mean, what do you thinking? What's the vibe?

[Ironclad]

It's really hard to tell. Like, I tried to maybe see if they were telling the truth, but I had empty, no thoughts kind of situation.

[Tolv]

I'm not hearing a lot from Mimir. I'm not hearing a lot from Bethesda. Bethesda. What's your story?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Mima and I, we. We're the sisters and we play the pranks, and we want to leave. Okay.

[Gunther]

Are you two plumbing sisters?

[Tolv]

Yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Elva]

Can you take your masks off so that we can see you?

[Doug Boone]

We could, but they're kind of our thing.

[Tolv]

Oh, are you guys, like, part of, like, is this, like, a culture? This is something that you're, like, tribe wears over.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I'll tell you what, you three make me wisdom checks. 12. You have advantage on this one.

[Tolv]

Okay?

[Natty Wonder]

Gosh, I'm rolling really bad on wisdom at 7.

[Elva]

6.

[Tolv]

That is a 2. And then that is a. With my advantage for 14.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You remember that one of the pirate factions that you saw during the combat, like, the cage fight kind of deal were wearing masks? Okay.

[Tolv]

And. And that was the.

[Natty Wonder]

See if we could figure it out.

[Tolv]

It was the Council of Conservation. The rabble. Oh, are you part of the troop? Troop?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

They both like.

[Doug Boone]

No.

[Tolv]

Okay, okay. I am your admiral.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, Science bit.

[Doug Boone]

We're part of the rabble.

[Tolv]

Oh, the rabble. Okay.

[Doug Boone]

After all, make mischief. Am I right?

[Elva]

You said you were part of the crew with the ghouls. If they were mean, why were you on their crew? If you say you were nice, they.

[Doug Boone]

Were easy targets for pranks.

[Tolv]

So, like, what is. What is the rabble's? Overall mission. I know you guys want to make mischief, but you certainly have some sort of like, like motto or like, mission statement. I would like to hear this from Bethesda, by the way.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Makes a mischief.

[Gunther]

Oh.

[Tolv]

Oh. Do you have anything you could, like, elaborate more on that?

[Gunther]

You know, like what.

[Tolv]

What do you guys seek? What is you. What is your objective?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Our objective is to have the fun and to play the pranks and to have a good time.

[Elva]

Do you mean us harm in any way?

[Doug Boone]

No.

[Elva]

Do they seem like they're telling the truth?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Make an insight check. Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

You guys want to do a vibe check?

[Tolv]

I'm gonna throw in a check for that as well.

[Gunther]

Vibe check hat available in store.sneeksdragonpod.com right now.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Look at that. I love the plug 10.

[Natty Wonder]

I love that hat so much.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I got a 9.

[Tolv]

It's corduroy.

[Gunther]

It's actually one of our better selling hats.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's a fun thing to refer to. Insight check says you all think that they're being honest. It seems like they just want to get out of here.

[Tolv]

Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

You guys didn't roll very well, did you?

[Tolv]

No, we did not know Gunther and Doug. What if we just let them set sail on a ship and then just make them promise not to, you know, mess with us and play their pranks?

[Ironclad]

I don't really think people whose whole motto is to cause mischief are going to not cause mischief. So.

[Elva]

Do we want them here with us?

[Ironclad]

They're locked up.

[Elva]

I do not wish for them to be locked up. We do not know their crimes. We are not judged. Jury. Executioner.

[Tolv]

Gunther has a point. Very passionate. Love that passion, Gunther. I would say it would probably be better if we left them out to sea to go back to their people. There could be potential allies down the road. If we run into the rabble. Ones more. But also, we probably don't want them on the island with us if we're trying to complete our mission.

[Doug Boone]

What a smart and wise leader you were all very lucky to have. I think we should all listen to him.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Last deal.

[Elva]

Can I see if Last Gill recognizes them?

[Natty Wonder]

Was Last Gil part of the rabble?

[Elva]

No. But they were locked up with Dit's crew in the skull place.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Correct. Last Gil just pokes their head down to the lower deck.

[Tolv]

No, but if they're anything like me as I let them go, I don't know. I think let's.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I will remind, from a metagame perspective, there's never a wrong decision.

[Tolv]

I'm going to say that we should probably just go Ahead and let them go. Let them be on their way. You know, we have all been held prisoner. At some point, I think that they want to leave. Okay, we'll give them our own little.

[Ironclad]

Rowboat and they'll just head on out.

[Tolv]

Yeah. Bethesda and Mimur, we are going to escort you up to the ship deck, give you a rowboat, and send you on our way. And you must promise to not make mischief with us today into giving a good word to the rabble that we were here to help you. Does that sound okay?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

They both stick out their pinkies through the bars.

[Ironclad]

Pinky. Promising. That means a lot, actually.

[Natty Wonder]

Probably sacred.

[Tolv]

That's good. Okay, I will return my pinkies.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, you have cold hands.

[Tolv]

Yes, I am dead.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

This is.

[Tolv]

This is a corpse that I am wearing. I'm actually a robot underneath.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Bethesda kind of, like, cocks her head a little bit and looks at you weirdly.

[Elva]

It is a warning. Do not mess with us, or we will wear your skin.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right, what do you want to do?

[Tolv]

Yeah, yeah, I would say I would find the keys, and then Tolv is going to release them and just, like, keep a good. They're smaller than Tolve, right? One's an elf and one's a halfling.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Elf and dwarf.

[Tolv]

Elf and dwarf. Okay. So since both of them are a little bit smaller, I'm going to keep a good grip on them, as in a friendly kind of way, but also in a I'm not going to let them go out of my sight kind of way, and then take them up to their boat.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. You look around the area. It's like that common trope. The keys for the cell are just, like, hanging on the wall, out of reach from the cells themselves. So you're able to grab them and unlock the brick.

[Elva]

And Gunther will escort as well with his sword.

[Tolv]

And just because you guys have been so cooperative, I'm going to give you some rations to be on your way. That way you're not trapped at sea and get hungry.

[Doug Boone]

Ooh, yum, yum, yum.

[Elva]

As a parting gift, is there anything you can say about this ship that we may not know to help us? Or if anything, about the privateer, we may encounter him again.

[Doug Boone]

Well, I will tell you that the door at the stern is the privateer's quarters, and the door at the bow is the crew's quarters.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right, so you lead them up to deck and put them into a. We'll call it a dinghy with some rations and send them on their way.

[Tolv]

And I want to Launch the ship by smashing a thing of champagne and calling it the Wingy Dinghy. That's your ship.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Now they begin rowing the Wingy Dinghy back towards the shore. Okay.

[Tolv]

And Toll salutes them as they go. Bye Bye.

[Elva]

Shall we go look at the privateers private quarters?

[Tolv]

I'm gonna hang out upstairs with Elva, but you guys knock yourselves out.

[Ironclad]

Well, I was about to go take a little nap ski. But knowing that the stern is the privateer's corpse, I feel maybe a little bit. We are going now, so maybe I should just go back to where the crew would sleep.

[Elva]

You might sleep better with the privateer quarters.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right. So Doug, you're going to the door at the bow. Gunther, are you going to the door at this turn?

[Elva]

Yeah, I just want to check it because the privateer was like in charge and see if also like if there's anything that could help us like maps or gear or anything.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Sure. You walk over to the door at the stern and try to open it up. But you find that it is locked.

[Elva]

I guess. Could I see if the keys that tolte had work?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You try those keys, but none of them seem to open up this door.

[Elva]

Guess I'll try and pick it.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Do you have thieves tools?

[Elva]

I don't know if I do. I have Smith's tools. So I could just try that or just.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You could also try to break the door down. And I'm gonna say no. Smith's tools are very different than thieves tools.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah.

[Elva]

Not the same then. Yeah, I guess I'll try that.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. Yeah. How are you going to try to break the door down?

[Elva]

Gunther's not the strongest, but I think using. He would use more like leverage. So like you maybe using the Smith's tools, You know, they have like the things that you hit the with maybe he's at kind of like almost like a crowbar.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

What is that called? The thing you hit with.

[Elva]

You're going to make me look it up.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The plank and the anvil. The.

[Elva]

What do they call it?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

What?

[Gunther]

A hammer.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

A hammer. There you go. It's a hammer.

[Gunther]

Hammer.

[Tolv]

Chris, what are you. All right.

[Gunther]

Special term for it.

[Elva]

I thought there was a special term.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Motioning hammers. All right. Anyway. Yeah, it'll. It'll take a few minutes for you to break it down. But yeah, you begin pounding on the door, trying to open it up. While you're doing that, I'm gonna cut over to Doug because Doug went to the other door. You get to that door and try to open it. And this door is open.

[Ironclad]

Oh, alright. Everything's coming up, Doug.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You swing the door open, and inside you see crew's quarters with 13 hammocks that are hanging.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I do a quick. Just glance around the room, see if there's anything, like, any trunks or any objects kind of out in the open.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You look around and you see what appear to be like, some personal effects left in some of the hammocks. Not any trunks per se, but just scattered about. Various personal effects that people that know sort of left in their own hammocks.

[Natty Wonder]

Can I take a look at one of them?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. Roll me a D29. Yeah. You look around and you find a brass sextant. It's like a small. A small one. If you think you could fit it in your pocket.

[Natty Wonder]

Okay, I will do that.

[Tolv]

It's a cool little gadget.

[Gunther]

What's a sextant?

[Elva]

It's like navigating.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Right.

[Natty Wonder]

Looks like a little navigator thing.

[Tolv]

Yeah, it's like. It looks like a metal piece of pizza, but it is not pizza. Do not eat it.

[Elva]

Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, I'm gonna pop that in my pocket so I have it.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, you use it to, like, look at stars and stuff to help you navigate. Yeah. As you pick it up and put it in your pocket, you see that there's a symbol etched into the bottom.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I take a closer look?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. It appears to be a starry eye.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I see if this is similar to anything that I have on me? Like, for example, the Spyglass of Zodia?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No, it doesn't seem to be quite the same. Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

Have I seen this symbol before?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Make me a wisdom check on an.

[Natty Wonder]

18 and rolled over.

[Ironclad]

It's a 7.

[Natty Wonder]

But I'm gonna use my inspiration Die.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

Oh, my God, a six.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

When that happens, I'll just try to.

[Natty Wonder]

Throw Captain Grumbles off again.

[Gunther]

That is not a gotcha pawn game for how to get a inspiration died.

[Tolv]

Infinity spawn. Cheat code. Yeah.

[Ironclad]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

This ain't a code. Captain Grumbles was stopping the nose from shooting you anymore when you're about to die in that last combat. So I think a little. Little gratitude would be in order.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Despite the low roll, you do know at least that this symbol is associated with a deity of some kind. You just can't remember which one.

[Natty Wonder]

Okay, well, I'm going to pocket it.

[Tolv]

All right, so with it being a brass sextant with a starry eye, one could argue it's a brass eye. So is it we find Sergeant Steel Eyes like long lost family members.

[Gunther]

Wow. That took. That took a few steps to get.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Through.

[Tolv]

Comedy podcast, though, you know, the.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

More explanation you have to do, the funnier it is.

[Tolv]

That's.

[Natty Wonder]

I love a good lead up.

[Tolv]

I had you going.

[Ironclad]

Oh, well, I think, you know, these hammocks look mighty comfortable. I think I might just take a little lie down in one of these.

[Natty Wonder]

Could Doug find the biggest one and take a little kip?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. Roll me a D20, Doug.

[Ironclad]

This one is too hot. This one's too cold.

[Natty Wonder]

4.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You find the biggest one and put your furry head on the pillow, and, yeah, it's really comfy. It's something about the swaying of the boat just kind of gently rocking you, and you can hear the. The waves lapping up against the side of the ship. It's very comfy.

[Ironclad]

I'm starting to rethink my retirement plan. I just want to live on a boat.

[Gunther]

Can Natty join into those quarters as well? I think at this point, Natty would wander in and find a little hammock and curl up with Gigi. Maybe. Maybe just plink a little bit of a. Of a. Like a shanty lullaby. Is that a thing?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Ooh, yeah, you can invent it. Yeah. You walk down below deck, and you see Gunther smashing at a door astern with a hammer. And at the bow, you see an open door, and you can hear Doug sawing some logs.

[Gunther]

Okay. I would find one of the hammocks pretty close to Doug. Don't need to be far away from him, and curl up with Gigi and the hammock together.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right. Yeah. Why don't you roll me a D20 as well, daddy two. Okay. Yeah. You know, you find a hammock and lay down. Gigi curls up, but you just can't get comfortable. There's something in the pillow.

[Gunther]

What's in the pillow, Gus? What's in the pillow?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You reach around and stick your hand in the pillow, and you pull out a key.

[Gunther]

Oh, what's the key look like?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It looks like a pretty mundane key, but with a very large head, like a very large handle that you would. Would grab onto.

[Gunther]

Can I just chuck it towards Gunther?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

I say, hey, hey. Gunther heads up. And I throw it at him.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Gunther, you turned around just in time to see something sparkling flying at you. Is Natty trying to kill you?

[Elva]

Gunther tries to grab it.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right. Make a dexterity check.

[Elva]

14.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You kind of fumble with it a little bit, but because got that large head on it, you're able to catch it and grab onto it.

[Elva]

Oh, thank you. This will help with the leverage of breaking down the door, and then Gunther goes to like use it to like push the door open. And then it's like double takes and then realizes it's a key and then tries it in the door.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. I was hoping you were going to start smashing the door with is gum. Gum maybe. Yeah. The key fits perfectly in the door and turns and clicks and unlocks it.

[Natty Wonder]

Got their enters also from down the hall you hear.

[Gunther]

It'S Gigi.

[Tolv]

Elvo. What kind of motor does boat have? It's very powerful.

[Gunther]

I think that's what you would hear is like a dual motor kind of thing of Doug and Gigi both fighting to see who can make the most disgusting respiratory noises.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Gunther, you open the door and inside you see a what you assume is the privateer's quarters. And in it is a four poster bed with red velvet curtains. And additionally you see a few chests around the room. One large chest and three small chests.

[Elva]

Can I check for traps on the chest?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Which one? The big one or one of the small ones?

[Elva]

I'll be the big one.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. Roll me an investigation.

[Elva]

Check A4.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No traps.

[Elva]

All right, cool. Gunther goes to try the big chest with the key. He has all the keys at this point, right? Because he has the ones.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You tried the same big key that opened up the door and it fits and it opens, it unlocks this large chest.

[Elva]

What's inside?

[Gunther]

You're not supposed to use your password for two different places. You're not supposed to use your key for two different things.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yep. That's Security 101. You open it up and inside you see a big pile of gold pieces.

[Elva]

Oh my goodness.

[Gunther]

Booty.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. Metagame wise, it's a thousand gold pieces.

[Elva]

Okay.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow.

[Elva]

Gunther shuts it, locks it again with the plan to tell the crew later when last gill's not around.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Tolv]

Yeah, yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Cutting out your party. I see how it is.

[Elva]

And then can he check the other chests?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You walk up to one of the small chests and it is also locked.

[Elva]

And you have the cat try all the keys and see if.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. The same big key opens it up as well. You pop it open and inside you see a crescent shaped crystalline decanter. And it's adorned with golden filigree and filled with some kind of water that seems to be like slowly moving.

[Elva]

A decanter is like a thing that's a pouring thing. Like a pot type thing.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Elva]

And the liquid inside look like normal liquid or magical in nature. Do I get any sense from it?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The fact that it's moving in an unusual manner makes you think that there's something special about this.

[Tolv]

Chug, chug, chug, chug.

[Elva]

Can I see what happens if I try and pour a little of the water, the stuff, out into the chest?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, you uncork it and pour, like, a tiny little bit out. But it appears like a gallon of water rushes out and spills onto the floor. Oh, no.

[Elva]

Then I cork it back up.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, you cork it back up.

[Elva]

Does. Does it look like it's still got the same amount of stuff in the decanter?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It seems more or less like the.

[Elva]

Same amount forever water. Can I taste it and see if it's salt or regular water?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You take a little sip of it, and it appears to be fresh water.

[Elva]

Ooh, that'd be great for your village then.

[Tolv]

I don't want to open up all.

[Elva]

The chests, but just me. Should I just. Does anyone else want to come?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Before anyone answers that, like, what do you do with this? Did you say you keep this? Do you put it back in the chest?

[Elva]

I'll keep this for now. Carefully.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yes. Would be very valuable to Gunther.

[Tolv]

I think at this point we're all taking long rests, so, like, maybe to kind of progress stuff, like if we all went seepy times.

[Elva]

I'll leave the other chest for later and go back to sleep.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And you said you were going to sleep here in the privateer's quarter underneath it.

[Natty Wonder]

Bold Moon.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Underneath it. That's right. Okay, you go ahead and begin taking your sleepy time as well. So everyone at this point would be taking a long rest, right? Yeah. Yeah. You all begin your long rest. If I recall properly, Gunther under the privateer's bed here in the privateer's quarters. Doug and Natty in the crew quarters. And Tol up top at the helm in, like, sentry mode, Correct?

[Gunther]

Yes.

[Tolv]

And I'm with Elva.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You and Elva pretty much are the only ones left on the deck. And you know, you're both in power down mode, but you both see and sense like a storm slowly start building. And first it's a little bit of wind, a little bit of rain. The clouds seem to thicken and grow, and before too long, the waves start growing in intensity. Lightning begins flashing and illuminating the sky and thunder rumbling everywhere. And a very strong thunderstorm begins rocking the ship to and fro.

[Natty Wonder]

Does this wake us?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, I guess even if you're below deck. Yeah. It would be like you're not being gently swayed back and forth. But it's a lot more severe to.

[Tolv]

And fro, I feel like, because there's this moment of being on a ship and Being in the presence of Alva, Pull would feel comfortable taking off parts of his disguise.

[Gunther]

Right.

[Tolv]

So he would want to remove his mask so that he can, like, feel the wind and the sea and the rain on his, like, real thaumatech face.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Sure.

[Tolv]

But, yeah, I mean, I. I think this is, like an old thing. This is insane. Something that he's unfamiliar with. So him and Elva would kick into gear and make sure that they're steering the ship accordingly, trying to avoid high tides and waves and things like that, and I guess, positioning the sails in the way that best navigates them through.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

These waves, batting down the hatches, that kind of thing.

[Tolv]

Yeah, all the ship turns that we all know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Make me a. Let's call it a constitution check with advantage, Cole. Okay.

[Tolv]

16.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You're able to use your strength and coordinate with Elva successfully and, you know, pull all the ropes and sail into the waves and secure the ship. I think the rest of your crew would be very nervous if you had not stepped up. It's like, a scary situation. But seeing you be so confident and working with Elva, like, hand in hand, makes everyone a little calmer, makes everyone a little more at ease. And as you feel the rain and the wind blowing on your Thaumatek skin, you hear Elva call out, sail ho. And she's pointing.

[Tolv]

So then I would run downstairs and with my. My real face, and I'd say, oh, hello, everybody. Not to wake you all from your slumber, your sleepy sleepies, but we have some visitors up ahead. Does anybody have any sort of, I don't know, magnifying tools, things that we can see them better with?

[Ironclad]

I mean, I have a spyglass, but I don't know if it magnifies.

[Gunther]

Isn't that what a spyglass does?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

So this one's special, though.

[Gunther]

Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

Aren't you thinking of, like, a. Isn't this, like, that little. Is this spyglass?

[Gunther]

Spyglass does the same thing.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It is.

[Ironclad]

Okay, I'll come upstairs and look through my spyglass.

[Tolv]

Okay, Come with me.

[Ironclad]

Doug is on the case. Toll. Correct.

[Tolv]

That's me. Why'd you ask?

[Ironclad]

You know, you're looking good, buddy.

[Tolv]

I can't not smile because it's just like a skeleton. Skeleton almost. Thank you so much, Doug. It feels so good to have my old face back and out.

[Ironclad]

Oh, I bet.

[Tolv]

Do you guys like it? Daddy? What do you think, Gunther?

[Gunther]

We have this amusement park back where I come from, and you look like a pirate on one of them ships that we used to ride that. That they used to sing little songs as you rode around a little raft.

[Tolv]

Sweet baby Gigi who come to uncle to.

[Gunther]

Wait, let me see. I gotta roll to see how Giggy's gonna react to that. 10 is a bad is a negative. So Gigi shrieks a little bit and backs up and, like, kind of coils up like an angry cat.

[Elva]

Gunther steps forward and, like, bows like Edmund.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Cool.

[Elva]

You look admirable.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, okay, what does Giggy sound like exactly?

[Gunther]

Hold on.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Perfect.

[Natty Wonder]

Love it.

[Gunther]

Okay, so no, I want Gigi now that I've made the noise. Giggy doesn't just back up. Gigi does full like Bram Stoker Dracula up in the ceiling corner. And he's like, up in the corner like back like Ben Affleck in Batman before Superman.

[Elva]

This is good. You've solved the Giggy problem.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Can we tie this into talented Mr. Ripley? Somehow.

[Doug Boone]

On WhatsApp, no one can see or hear your personal messages. Whether it's a voice call message or sending a password to WhatsApp, it's all just this. So whether you're sharing the streaming password in the family chat or trading those late night voice messages that could basically become a podcast, your personal messages stay between you, your friends, and your family. No one else, not even us. WhatsApp message privately with everyone.

[Gunther]

This episode is brought to you by Polestar. There's only one true way to experience the all electric luxury SUV Polestar 3.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And that's to take a test drive. It can go from 0 to 60 in as little as 4.8 seconds with the dynamic handling of a sports car. But to truly understand how it commands the road, you need to be behind the wheel.

[Gunther]

Up to 350 miles of range.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The 3D surround sound system by Bowers and Wilkins. It's all something you have to experience to believe.

[Tolv]

So book your Test drive for Polestar 3 [e-mail]. if you went on a road trip.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And you didn't stop for a Big.

[Tolv]

Mac or drop a crispy fry between the car seats or use your McDonald's bag as a placemat, then that wasn't the road trip. It was just a really long drive at participating McDonald's.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

All right, so does everyone go above deck?

[Doug Boone]

Yes.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, except for Gigi.

[Gunther]

Apparently Natty will do a little. A little shushing him down and take him up with him. She wants him to get the full experience of everything.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay, you all head back up above deck, and amidst the gray, misty gales and billowing breakers, you see new sails that have suddenly appeared on the hazy horizon. Though the Ship is leagues away from you. The cut of its jib brings feelings of warmth and welcome inside. Even stranger is the enchanting music being carried on. The whistling wind. The rhythmic stomping and shouting accompanied by stringed instrument sounds like a loot. What do you all do to prepare?

[Natty Wonder]

I mean, could I see anything with my spyglass?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You take a look and it's difficult to train on. It's that thing where there's so many waves because of the storm, and it's at such a distance, it's hard to keep it steady. Yeah, you're kind of rocking around and it's hard to really get it to focus on this particular small spot.

[Gunther]

Natty hears the music and feels like a jam session is coming and starts tuning her auto heart makes sure this.

[Elva]

Is not an illusion.

[Gunther]

Y' all are really nervous. I just been watching you guys around this ship. Y' all are very cautious and nervous.

[Ironclad]

Some of us almost died a few moments ago on this very ship.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Maddie did too.

[Tolv]

You know what Tove would do in this situation? He would find a piece of cloth, perhaps like maybe down in the quarters, and then he would make some, like, a peaceful flag. Some sort of like a white flag. Well, that's kind of like we give up. Maybe just like swap out the.

[Elva]

The pirate eye one.

[Tolv]

Yeah. Like I swap out the flag for, like a happy face and just let them know we are very friendly and we want to jam. Am I right?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. You begin trying to swap out the flag on your ship. I'm getting jokes from the peanut gallery here. Ben says a flag that really says, yoohoo. My name is Toll. And Micah says a flag that says we cool. You begin swapping the flag out. And as you're doing so, the shanty singing ship rapidly sails straight towards you all, much faster than it should be able to. Faster and faster cut through the storm of surging soils like a knife through melted butter. And before you know it, the vessel reveals the broad side of its hull. Salty, unforgiving waves splash across its faded lettering. The Jebediah. We're going to go ahead and make a reality check.

[Tolv]

Oh, my gosh.

[Natty Wonder]

I. I was about to say something about a loot, and I was just like, said fart.

[Elva]

What's reality?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I'm glad you asked. In a really weird way, a reality check is you roll a D20 and add all of your ability score modifiers. So add your strength modifier, dexterity modifier, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma.

[Gunther]

31.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

28.

[Natty Wonder]

Mine is a 19 total 21.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I have been good at these. Not so much anymore.

[Natty Wonder]

I've been rolling real bad this session.

[Elva]

I rolled to 13 old lucky.

[Tolv]

Sorry John. Got like a 30 something.

[Gunther]

So we're 31 and 28 for me.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And just as the ship is about to crash into you, it fades into the wind as if it never existed. Natty, you know that whatever it was you just saw that wasn't from this world. It's not right. It doesn't belong here. However, the rest of you, it kind of breaks your brain a little bit. It doesn't make sense that that ship appeared, moved so quickly and then you know, just as about to broadside you, it disappeared and to. It makes you kind of rethink your decisions for metagame wise the rest of this session. You've decided to turn over a new leaf for a little while. And you now hate violence. You don't want to do anything violent. You have a new perspective on life for now.

[Tolv]

Okay.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow. Doug. Something about that sea shanty and something about the. The loot playing just like unlocked a primal fear in you and you don't want to hear music anymore. Music is the most terrifying thing in the world.

[Natty Wonder]

Oh gosh.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And Gunther, seeing that ship come up like that made you think you were going to get into a fight of some kind and there would be bloodshed. And that just kind of turns your stomach. You hate the side the of blood. It's scary to you.

[Tolv]

That was very upsetting.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. These are like temporary status effects for the rest of this session.

[Gunther]

Okay, can we talk about that for a second?

[Ironclad]

What just happened?

[Tolv]

Should we unpack what we just vent through you got.

[Gunther]

You guys been noticing any sort of weird situations like that? I had something like that happen when we were on trial back at the camp. Whatever we came from. Camp. I get it. Camp and camp Andrews Bay and Ford Anderson. There it is. I got it. Ford Andridge. Ford Andridge. I had something like that happen at the. It wasn't a pulpit but whatever that thing inside of the judge place where you stood and testified, testified stand. Something like that kind of appeared and it was there for a second and then it was gone.

[Ironclad]

Yeah, I've had some moments like that too. Or think something. Something felt, I don't know, like familial in a way but also like I didn't quite know what it was.

[Gunther]

You think there's something we can do to like. I don't know, I'm just drawing at. I'm pulling at strings here. Just like can we like maybe focus or something together? Have A little like seance or, or. I don't know. I honestly, I'm just like. It's weirding me out. I'm tired of this stuff happening. I like, I like things being straight and, and, and, and direct and this whole frilly things appear and disappear and it's confusing me.

[Tolv]

This bothered Natty so much she is deciding to go straight.

[Ironclad]

Wow. She doesn't like being straight.

[Tolv]

That's crazy.

[Ironclad]

Sound like Natty at all. I'm. I'm extra. More confused now.

[Tolv]

I would slap you out of it, but I do not like violence. Oh, this is so strange.

[Elva]

I want to see bloodshed.

[Tolv]

Oh my God.

[Ironclad]

You said that in a melodic way and I hate it.

[Gunther]

Very good, very good. That was very good.

[Tolv]

Oh, that was weird. Elva, have you been experiencing anything like this? I'm like, just paradigm shifting weirdness that makes you want to poop your pants. Even though we do not poop because we are robots.

[Doug Boone]

No, I have not.

[Tolv]

Captain Grumbles, what is your take on this?

[Gunther]

I actually. No, you know what? I thought about it for a second there and maybe there's something we haven't tried before. Okay, now I know I've talked about my deity. She's my boo. And aren't we looking for your deity, the sea drinker?

[Tolv]

Yeah, the sea drinker. Also, AKA Njorda. Also Alva. That's new information. I don't know if you know that, but her real name is Njorda.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, I did not know that.

[Tolv]

Yeah, big surprise.

[Gunther]

My lady friend, she shows up when she wants and so I can't. I don't really find it easy to call upon her because she's very busy. I don't know if you guys know this. A lot of people die every day. It really keeps her busy.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Really?

[Gunther]

So Doug or Gunther, is there any sort of like connection you have with any sort of God that we could maybe like, ask for guidance or something?

[Elva]

I will ask my God for guidance. But. But it's thus so much guidance, but protection from the outside world.

[Gunther]

I'm not quite sure if I understood that as an answer to my question.

[Tolv]

So I'll just move to Doug of Never Nude. It's the God of clothing. I don't know.

[Gunther]

I don't know. Doug, is there maybe someone you could like, call upon to maybe Answers? I don't know. They might not answer. You know, like I said, they're fickle creatures, these gods. But I'm just, I'm trying to figure this out. We just had a ship almost come and hit us and then it disappeared.

[Ironclad]

I know, I know a lot's going on here and I don't know if like. Do you think that was like a sign sent by the sea drinker to kind of like push us in the right direction?

[Tolv]

Does holes know if the sea drinker has such power?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Make a religion check. That's the thing, right? Yeah. Make a religion check.

[Tolv]

Okay. Nat 20.

[Elva]

Wow.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You know that the sea drinker's abilities include things like controlling the sea and controlling water and summoning water creatures. But this isn't really fall under any of those umbrellas, you know? Okay, yeah, it's like adjacent, but not really.

[Tolv]

Yeah, I do not think that this is a sea drinker's doing. They're more like water based crime things. You know, not crying, but you know, water thing things.

[Ironclad]

Okay, well, I mean, all of this is such a great mystery and Doug very much respects the deity who is said to be the keeper of the mysteries, the veiled eye.

[Gunther]

Well, hot dang. Ask that mystery dude what we could do about this.

[Ironclad]

Well, I just. It's such an open ended question, you know, like.

[Gunther]

Well, I mean, I find, yes, you are correct, Doug. But maybe this is something where if you could take a moment and maybe just try to call upon that mystery person for guidance, they might guide you towards answers to the mystery. I'm not quite sure.

[Ironclad]

Okay, well, I've never done this in front of other people before, so.

[Elva]

Do you want to be alone?

[Ironclad]

Yeah, if you guys maybe just want to like turn around or something.

[Gunther]

Okay, we turn around. Captain Grumbles does not. He's staring daggers at you. Just dead eyes staring at you.

[Natty Wonder]

And then Doug closes his eyes and very quietly reaches out to the veiled eye.

[Ironclad]

Veiled eye. Is Doug Boone here again? You know, I know I've asked you a lot of questions in my time of need, and me and my friends, we were just wondering like, what's the next move? Where do we go from here? We see the ship, we have these feelings and we all of a sudden are scared of these things. And I just. I don't really. We don't really know what to do. And I could really use your guidance right now.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

As you close your eyes and begin trying to look for this direction, a thought pops into your head. The symbol on the sextant is the same symbol as that of this deity.

[Natty Wonder]

Of my deity?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Ironclad]

How could I not have seen it? No pun intended.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

And you hear a voice in your head.

[Elva]

For such knowledge, what do you have to offer me?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

What invention?

[Tolv]

What creation?

[Ironclad]

Doug, what if I were to, you know, help out one of my teammates, make their armor even stronger and protect them more. You know, something new or something that they already have.

[Elva]

Such craftsmanship would bring honor to me, Douglas Boone. In all my eons of eternal existence, these visions are something from beyond.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Even my doing.

[Elva]

This is the work of someone. Something from beyond this realm.

[Ironclad]

Okay, guys, you can turn around now.

[Elva]

Hello?

[Natty Wonder]

Okay, and then I think I would relay that information to them to.

[Tolv]

Says, turn around every now and then. I'm stuck. React to that.

[Ironclad]

Come around. You don't talk to music.

[Tolv]

No talking.

[Natty Wonder]

Oh, right.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

He just hurts. He wants to be polite, but he's blocking his ears and just sweating.

[Gunther]

Do you have direction?

[Ironclad]

Well, it's just I basically was told this is not really something from around here, and it's. It's kind of beyond our realm. But I think I do want to give back to my great deity and also give back to one of you. So, Guntor, do you think I could borrow your armor for just a little bit?

[Elva]

My armor? Yes, of course. Though I also was hoping you could help with my sword.

[Ironclad]

Oh, a little. Two in one.

[Tolv]

Yeah. Beggars can't be truisers. But whatever, you know.

[Ironclad]

You know what, Gunther? Anything for you, bud.

[Elva]

Where do you smith?

[Ironclad]

I think I'd probably have to go back below deck because it's a little windy up.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Elva]

Then can we go back down deck?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, of course. You all proceed below deck.

[Natty Wonder]

And so then I take Gunther's sword and his armor from him.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Elva]

And as I hand you, Gunther's sword is like this sword. It is my father's sword. I received it when he was killed. And for you see, he was not a swordsman. He was a farmer. But it has been passed down for many times. Many, many times. We are not fighters in my village, but we once were. Our village was attacked, and everyone was killed, and. And something very precious to us was taken. I will find him and I will kill him and return what was taken to my village. And I asked if you can help me make my father's blade stronger.

[Ironclad]

Yes, thank you for the context. It's very helpful.

[Tolv]

Backstory.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow.

[Elva]

This material was found with one of my people in the tunnels. The fragment of Frostblad. And I believe it can help strengthen my father's blade.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Ooh. That was a long time ago.

[Elva]

And I have that as a material in which to temper with.

[Ironclad]

Okay.

[Natty Wonder]

So I'd to like. Like, infuse them together kind of thing. Is it possible to do that? And also to use another slot of my infuse item, which does take some time, but I want to enhance defense on Gunther's armor. Okay, so that would be. The creature gains a plus one bonus to armor class while wearing their armor or wielding a shield of the infused item.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Nice.

[Natty Wonder]

So I think, yeah, as you're wearing your armor, Gunther, you would just get. Get a plus one to your ac.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

How long does that last? Is that permanent?

[Natty Wonder]

It's permanent until. Wow, I have two slots. So basically, if I do something to another item, I think Tolve would lose his hammer infusion that I gave him a few a few episodes ago.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I see. All right, so, yeah, you're infusing that, so. Okay, cool. It sounds like you got your work cut out for you, Doug.

[Ironclad]

I'll be hard at work here. I hope you're watching Updale. You know who you are.

[Tolv]

Cold looks in the air.

[Elva]

Gunther wants to help out as best he however he can because he has help with. He's proficient with smithing.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. What about Natty? I know you had mentioned something about a downtime thing earlier.

[Tolv]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

So I don't mean to interrupt what Doug, you and Gunther be doing, but I actually do have a request for each of you. Like I said when we were back at the. I'm gonna remember the name of this building that was on the water that we left to get on the ship. It was called a Row. Robo. Robo. Robo.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Ro.

[Gunther]

Ro. Yeah, I was there. I was trying to get Last Skill. Roarbee. Thank you, Micah. I was trying to get Last Gill to teach Gigi a lesson, but I think we got interrupted. Yeah, because we teleported to a big old fight we weren't expecting. And so I feel like Gigi is behind on his lessons. He needs to be. He needs to get further towards his task of being the harbinger of doom and bring her of the apocalypse. It's a very important job, and I don't want to be a bad mom. So I've decided that right now, since we're on the boat, it'd be a good time for each of you maybe to assist with the lesson. If you guys are down with it, I feel like there's something maybe each of you could impart on my Mr. Gigglesworth. Sometime today.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Maybe we start with. With Tolv. And then once Doug and Gunther are wrapped up, they can join in.

[Gunther]

Yeah. To you. Down for being a teacher for a minute.

[Tolv]

Tol's head turns 360 degrees. With a big metal smile, he says, that sounds great. I love my little Nephew.

[Gunther]

Okay. I've been thinking about things that are important for a little doombringer to have. And Gigi right now, in his current age and state, he's quite small, but you can tell he really likes to use his energy. He's kind of like them little dogs. Don't think that. Don't know that they're as small as they are. And I want to make sure that keeps going. So is there a way that you might be able to teach Gigi because you're so good at using your emotions to your advantage to, you know, bring you power or, or defend yourself? Is there maybe, like, a lesson you could teach Gigi on how to do that as well? It could be something either, like, like an emotional drill or something you do to, like, use that rage to turn into strength. Or maybe a story you could tell him or, or like a, a workout routine or something he could do. Is there something like that you could help with?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow, I.

[Tolv]

Full disclosure, thought you were going to ask me to teach him, like, rope tying or, like, how to sail a boat, but, yeah, no, I could rage. You want to talk about rage? That would be fun.

[Gunther]

Yeah. How about. Yeah, Yeah, I plop Gigi down in front of him just. And just go. All right, professor, to.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Just a reminder, professor, before you start your lesson plan, the professor currently hates violence.

[Tolv]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

So, yeah, I think this is a perfect time for this.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Curious to hear how this lesson goes.

[Tolv]

Well, hello, Mr. Giggy. I'm going to be doing attendance for class. Let's go through roll call. Let me see Gigi.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Great.

[Tolv]

Okay, now that that's wrapped up. So, yeah, sometimes I will draw on really sad, but, you know, memories that will make me get into a certain emotional state, you know, that keeps me all riled up, gets my blood pumping, you know, But I do it in a very that, like, I take control of those emotions, you know, I, I, I, I, like, use those to power me. Okay, so, you know, Gigi, what I want you to do is think of a time where, you know, perhaps your mom was, like, in danger and you felt like, you know, something was going to happen to her. Can you do that for me, Gigi?

[Gunther]

Roll to see if Gigi does that. 16. Gigi thinks about the that.

[Tolv]

Okay, now, before you get out of hand and start, you know, getting like, all clawy, bitey, bitey. Embrace that emotion, you know, focus around it, tense up all of your muscles, think very hard about it, and then, you know, use that to, to, like, take that cool ax of yours. And then I don't know. Do we have any, like, barrels around here that he could just quack true?

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, get some of that rage out.

[Tolv]

Yeah, let that rage out. Direct it pinpointed. Precisely. Instead of having it explode explodey in every direction, pinpoint it exactly on that barrel right there. Okay.

[Gunther]

The mechanics of this are thusly for me to determine the success of your lesson, Gigi has to make a wisdom check. In the description, it determines an easy, a medium, or hard lesson. I'm gonna ask the dm, what would you deem this?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

In my opinion, this is an easy lesson.

[Gunther]

All right, so it's a DC10. Check Gigi's wisdom modifier. That is a zero. So, all right, 10 or higher to see if Gigi learns his lesson.

[Tolv]

Come on, Gigi, you can do it.

[Gunther]

That's a 14.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, that's my boy.

[Natty Wonder]

That's a good lesson.

[Gunther]

All right, so Gigi's gonna attack the barrel. Let's just see how that handles. Just see how that works out. Yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. Go ahead.

[Gunther]

Okay, I'm gonna roll for an attack. That's a Nat20. Wow.

[Ironclad]

Oh, nice.

[Gunther]

Nat20 swings the axe, cleaves it in two. As a happy baby, the pieces would.

[Tolv]

Fly off into the ocean. Team Rocket style.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

So intact, Micah wrote, use the Norse Luke.

[Gunther]

Yeah, that's good.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's really good.

[Gunther]

And so that he gets temporary HP equal to his proficiency for that one, which we don't need to worry about the details of that right now. Okay, I'm gonna ask the DM a request. According to this mechanic, I'm only allowed to do this once per short rest. I haven't done this yet. Could you, like, bend the rules and let me do it maybe a couple more times and just see what happens?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, let's do it. Let's have fun. Okay. We're here to have fun.

[Tolv]

That's what I figured.

[Gunther]

I've been wanting to do this, but it's been like episodes and episodes to find some time. All right, I'm gonna roll. See what Giggy does after cleaving that thing, I rolled a 17. He goes and gives Tolv a huge hug.

[Tolv]

Oh, I love it. I hug him back. I clip a lock of Bjorn's hair off of my Bjorn mask and wig combo thing, tie it into a little knot, and it's like, this is your rage badge. Here you go. You've earned it, baby.

[Natty Wonder]

I'm also just imagining the size of difference right now between Tol and Gigi. It's like cuz to's huge, right?

[Tolv]

Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

And Giggy's probably just like, like little.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Tiny squeaky thing he's like hugging to space.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

Natty would come up and affix that. That little knot to Giggy's little harness that he uses. So he has that on his harness.

[Tolv]

Now you've learned to control your emotions and to instead of letting them control you. I am so proud of you, little Giggy.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I believe Gigi's proficiency modifier should be two, by the way.

[Gunther]

Thank you very much.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Or proficiency bonus, I should say. Okay.

[Gunther]

All right. Can I do another lesson? Is that okay with the group?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Before you get to that lesson, we'll say Doug and Gunther have wrapped up what they were doing. I don't know if there's anything you want to do to resolve that between you two before Natty shows up to do this.

[Natty Wonder]

I think, like, once it's all done, I imagine Gunther's been there with him the whole time.

[Ironclad]

Okay, Gunther, try it on. See if it fits.

[Elva]

It does fit.

[Ironclad]

You look even more handsome than before.

[Elva]

Oh, that is so nice to say, but I am married.

[Ironclad]

I gotta say, also, this. This armor also really brings out your eye color.

[Elva]

Thank you very much, Doug.

[Natty Wonder]

Oh, and also, before I get too far away from it, I want to make sure Gunther adds a plus one to his ac.

[Elva]

Thank you.

[Tolv]

Smart.

[Ironclad]

Oh, yeah.

[Tolv]

Here's your sword, Gunther.

[Elva]

Pick it up and then, like, try it out and, like, wave it around.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

Is there something nearby that you could, like, stab?

[Elva]

Is there anything I can stab?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You say, like supplies down there? You say like there's like a sack of beans or whatever?

[Elva]

Yeah, yeah, I'll stab a sack of beans.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You stab the sack of beans, and it seems like as it hits, as it impacts, a layer of ice begins spreading across the entire bag and then manifesting onto the floor and the wall as well. Wow.

[Elva]

This infused with ice. Doug, you. You have done great honor to my father. It's an honor, and I promise if anything I can do to repay you, I will.

[Ironclad]

You got it, Gunther. I will. I will make note of that.

[Elva]

Sorry. In memory, Doug has told Gunther what happened with his family.

[Natty Wonder]

Kind of. I haven't gone into detail quite yet.

[Elva]

Losing family and my village was second hardest thing I have had in my life. And Doc, I know that you have had loss with your family. And as you have helped me bring hopefully me closer to my family now, I hope to do the same to you in one way or the other.

[Ironclad]

Thank you, Konto. That means a lot. And I'm sorry that you've had to had so much Loss in your life, it never really leaves you.

[Elva]

You know, I've had loss, but I have more to live for. So that's why I must hurry and. And, and accomplish what I need to so I can see them again.

[Ironclad]

Whatever helps you, I'll be there for you, buddy.

[Elva]

Got their hugs.

[Ironclad]

Maybe. Maybe let me use that sword once or twice, just for fun, you know, if my drink's too hot or something like that.

[Elva]

Oh, also, Gunther's like, oh, there's treasure there.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I guess at that point that would be when Natty walks in with Giggy.

[Gunther]

Yeah, Natty would see your brand new fandangled blade and be like, this is perfect timing, because I have another lesson that I thought, Gunther, you would be perfect for. Bestowing the wisdom of Gigi. I know he's gonna need to use all the tools available to achieve his greater goal. And it's not going to just be relying on upon his own, like, animosity and his claws and his teeth. He's already, like, starting to learn how tools can be something that's helpful. And you're such an accomplished fighter using weapons available with you. I was hoping maybe you'd give a little lesson on that with Gigi. Maybe help him use that axe that he found better or anything else he finds along his way to his advantage.

[Elva]

Yes, little one. I'm also little, so I understand that people sometimes think you are small, but you can see still do big things. But the most important thing of fighting is not to kill or to to do damage, but to protect those that you want to not be killed. So with your sword, do not always go to attack, but go to protect. Like show more like defensive moves and like less straight up attacking, but more like how to block and protect and parry and things like that.

[Gunther]

Sure.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

We roll. I rolled a 4.

[Gunther]

I rolled a 4.

[Tolv]

I rolled a four.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I'm not sure. I'm double checking the math, but I think that's a failure.

[Elva]

That is a failure, little one.

[Gunther]

Failure. I'll read you the thing because, Gus, you might get to help here. Gigi either forgets the lesson, misinterprets it in an amusing way, or something chaotic happens. Gus, do you have an idea of what Giggy does?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You know you're trying to teach Gigi this lesson, but as you're talking his attention, slowly he does that thing where he stops looking at you and he slowly starts turning and he's looking at the bag of frozen beans and he begins just popping them like candy, just like handfuls of frozen beans into his mouth. One after another, he's just, like, chomping down non stop on frozen beans.

[Gunther]

Natty just looks at this and goes, isn't he just perfect? He's just so smart. Look at him.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

He does that thing where it begins accelerating, and instead of, like, his head gets closer and closer to the beans, and eventually it just devolves to where he's not grabbing beans and putting them in his mouth, but his whole head is in the bag, and he's just, like, chomping down on frozen beans.

[Elva]

It is also important to stay well fed when fighting.

[Gunther]

You need calories to burn to fight.

[Tolv]

Great job.

[Gunther]

When you said that, Gus, I was imagining. Have you ever seen dogs do this before? But cats do this where they just almost unhinge their mouth and just, like, pull in the food like that.

[Tolv]

No chew.

[Gunther]

Just. Just in.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

All right. Well, you know, that didn't go the way we thought, but I feel like he learned something. I think there's a silver lining everywhere.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I think the silver lining is we can now sell frozen bean sacks at store. Stinky Dragon podcast.

[Gunther]

Oh, my God.

[Tolv]

Available now.

[Gunther]

All right, and I turn to Doug. Doug.

[Ironclad]

Yes?

[Gunther]

I got one more ask.

[Ironclad]

What can I do for you, Natty? I'm in a helping mood today.

[Gunther]

Oh, good. I feel like you're doing so good. Let's get to keep the ball rolling. So as Gigi gets to the point where he ends all things, I think it's important that he knows about what he's ending, because with that comes an understanding of what you're bringing to a close so that you're making room for something else coming about. Okay.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay.

[Gunther]

I feel like that's important. So is there maybe a history lesson or. Or some sort of knowledge that you can bestow upon Gigi that's unique to you? Because I feel like he should take from people what they have to give. Okay, so is there any sort of, like, lesson like that, either from your life or your schooling or your tribe particularly, that Gigi can use to kind of grow his knowledge?

[Ironclad]

Absolutely.

[Gunther]

His wisdom modifier is plus zero.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Absolutely.

[Ironclad]

So I was thinking, you know, at first I was going to go a little more complicated and say, like, oh, maybe I could just teach him how to weed, because he probably doesn't know how to weed yet, you know.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh.

[Ironclad]

But I think that might take.

[Gunther]

Because you want to be a gardener in your retirement.

[Ironclad]

Weed with our text and stuff. But instead, you know, I think there was something that I could teach them.

[Gunther]

Oh, good.

[Ironclad]

Righty tighty, lefty loosey. Oh, it says this thing comes in handy more often than, you know.

[Gunther]

Is that like a chant from your village?

[Ironclad]

Yeah. Well, no, it's my own. It's my own chant that I do for myself whenever I forget. You know, it's righty to tighten something, lefty to lose something. So if he's ever, like, screwing in something or trying to fix something, it might come in handy one day.

[Gunther]

Yeah. Could you pair that with another list? And could you teach him right and left as well?

[Ironclad]

Yes, absolutely. Does he have fingers? I haven't actually looked at Giggy's hands. I don't know if they're too little, like kind of stubborns or just.

[Gunther]

Just a normal thing you ask a.

[Tolv]

Parent of their child.

[Ironclad]

Yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Fingers. Does he have fingies? Yeah.

[Tolv]

Does he have fingies? Does your. Does your child have.

[Gunther]

He's got grubby little fingers, Gus. Is that easy, medium, or hard?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

This one, I would say, say is medium because I feel like it's two concepts. Left and right, and then lefty loosey, righty tighty.

[Gunther]

All right, let me roll to see how Gigi takes that. That's a 17.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow, that's good.

[Gunther]

And with a medium lesson, he gains. Oh, add this more. Some more HP stuff. Gains an additional hit. Die to hp.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow.

[Gunther]

Yeah. So Gigi, like, kind of does the little, like that dog thing he does. Everyone sort of the head tilts one way, hell tilts the other way. He's kind of thinking about what he's doing, and then he goes right in a circle, and he goes left in a circle. And he looks at his hands and he realizes there's a direction each of those hands is. And he's like. He puts his hands up to you, and he's. He's delighted, and. And he. And he wants you to join him in his. In his joy.

[Natty Wonder]

Doug grabs Giggy's hands and spins in.

[Ironclad]

A circle and goes, okay, which way are we going now, Gig?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yes. I like to think that since Doug's hands are so furry and Giggy's hands are so sticky, it's difficult to detach yourself when you're done holding hands with Gigi.

[Natty Wonder]

Yeah, the hair just kind of like. He gets little hairs all over his sticky hands.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Gunther]

And then when Doug finishes spinning and puts Giggy down, he vomits up all those frozen beans.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, perfect. They're defrosted now we're gonna come out.

[Tolv]

To one way or another.

[Ironclad]

I'm sure that'll wake your mom up in the middle of the night.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Just ready? Yeah.

[Gunther]

Okay. Thank you so much. I appreciate Y' all joining me for a day of lessons? For Giggy, this is something he'll never forget. How often do people get to go to school on a boat?

[Tolv]

Yeah, I guess not often.

[Ironclad]

Probably more often than you think, actually.

[Natty Wonder]

Like, 12 people.

[Ironclad]

I mean, he. He's probably homeschooled by 12.

[Tolv]

Yeah, but it was like, you know, instead of mathematics and science, it was like killing and stabbing, but, you know, I get that. Yeah. Yeah. You're sure?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Tolv]

At this point, to would be back with Elva.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. Yeah.

[Tolv]

But, yeah, like, I mean, we. We've. I've been sticking close to Elva this entire time. But it's funny, though, because Tol V and Elva did want to speak to Doug, if that's okay, if we could pull Doug to the side.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, I mean, that's up to Doug.

[Ironclad]

I guess everyone wants a little bit of Doug today.

[Tolv]

That's right.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Well, it's. It's funny that earlier you said you. You were, like, in a helping mood, and you want to help everyone, and I feel like. Yeah, you've been involved in every journey so far.

[Natty Wonder]

I think he's also coming out of his shell more and more.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, that's nice. I like that.

[Tolv]

So, Doug, do you have a second to talk to me and Elva?

[Ironclad]

Of course. Elva, pleasure to officially meet you. You look just like your brother.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, thank you. We are cut of the same cloth, if you will.

[Gunther]

Metal a few.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Forgot. For a second I was Alpha. I was like, when's Elfa gonna reply? I was like, oh, that's me.

[Tolv]

Read receipt from Elva.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yep.

[Tolv]

So I have been telling Elva about our, you know, adventures and just been catching up with her journeys and reminiscing about our brothers and sisters. And in the process of telling them a story, you know, I realized that, you know, you have little Cambot.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Can.

[Tolv]

Can you bring out Gambot? Can you summon him?

[Ironclad]

It would be my honor.

[Natty Wonder]

And Doug conjures up his little Gambot, who then waddles out.

[Tolv]

This is not, you know, Elva and I wanting to confront you, but with us having been machines and service to somebody, we just want to make sure that, you know, you take good care of Gambot. And by all accounts, it seems like every time I have interacted with Gambot, he seems so happy, and he seems like he trusts you. And first of all, I just wanted to thank you for not being cruel to him because we had a lot of cruelty in our time with Ironclad.

[Ironclad]

I'm really sorry to hear that.

[Tolv]

Yeah. And, you know, we always. We want to be here for you and for Gambot. So if you ever have any questions or if you ever need, you know, anything from us, we are here because we don't feel like people treat machines very well.

[Ironclad]

Well, you know, I. I made Gambot, you know, a long time ago. And not only do I feel kind of like his papa because, like, I made him, but, you know, he's always been very dedicated to helping me and just, you know, I know he seems happy, and maybe that's in part to the fact that I built him with a smile on his face.

[Tolv]

Yeah, yeah, that's there. Yeah.

[Ironclad]

Well, you know, he's. You know, he's still a soul, and so I'm glad that you think that. Did I treat him like. Because I really do try.

[Tolv]

Well, we were both commenting on just the fact that he seems so well maintained, and you take care of, like, polishing him and, like, buffing out dents and doing maintenance, and everything is done with great care. So I just wanted to thank you that it's very healing for Elva and I to see such care taken for a machine.

[Ironclad]

Well, that's very touching. Thank you, Tolv. If you guys ever need a tune up, you know, I've been. I got all my tools with me, so if you guys ever need anything.

[Tolv]

Well, I guess that is, you know, my next thing is once we find a suitable replacement for Elva's leg, we would love for you to help bring her back to working order.

[Ironclad]

I could definitely figure that one out. You got it.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Well, that's it.

[Tolv]

I'm just gonna hang out with Elva and catch up. You can go away now.

[Ironclad]

Okay, I'll leave you and your sister. There's a bonding time.

[Tolv]

Can we hang out with Gambot, though? He's just so silly and so fun and cute.

[Natty Wonder]

Doug looks over to Gambot and he does a little and, like, up and down.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, just.

[Ironclad]

Just send him back over when you're done.

[Tolv]

Okay, will do. That's all I wanted to do.

[Natty Wonder]

Playing fetch with him like a dog, you know, Brother.

[Doug Boone]

Talking about this technology and a suitable time and place to perform maintenance on us. I have heard a rumor while looking for the sea drinker that could perhaps be of help to us.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, yeah.

[Tolv]

My ears are opened. Even though I do not have ears. They're more like, you know, audio receptors. But they are tuned in and listening well.

[Doug Boone]

My audio transmitters are about to engage, so. Let us meet. Legends tell of an island that has advanced technology that have been lost to time that could perhaps help us.

[Tolv]

Interesting. That sounds so cool. What? I mean, do you think any of our brothers and sisters have perhaps found this place?

[Doug Boone]

Maybe. Maybe the sea drinker can let us know if that is the case or not.

[Tolv]

Gambit, what's your thoughts on that? Yeah, count me in. Gambatin.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

We.

[Tolv]

We need to find this eternal whirlpool.

[Natty Wonder]

Those are all his little like spring loaded bounces and stuff like that.

[Tolv]

And can this whirlpool clean delicates as well as like, blankets and towels?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Get out of here. Duck. And Tolv, I want both of you to make me wisdom checks. Both of you with advantage, okay? Oh, man.

[Natty Wonder]

With advantage. I got an 11. My wisdom's pretty good. I've just been rolling wisdom badly today.

[Tolv]

18.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I think it's funny that Tolv's wisdom is the same as Giggy's. Really funny to me, Toll, having this conversation here about repairing and about, you know, trying to fix Elvis Lake. It reminds you of something. You all have a metallic leg.

[Gunther]

That's what I thought.

[Tolv]

Did we take that from that cave?

[Gunther]

Yeah, we did.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, you all kept it.

[Natty Wonder]

You did. I forget who has it.

[Gunther]

There's Toll.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I think Toll has it.

[Gunther]

Okay. I just didn't want to step on the moment.

[Tolv]

Do you mind if we rewind a little bit to that thing? To that moment?

[Elva]

Or you just pretend like you're like.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, wait, look at this. You can like, pick it up. Like, talk about like, oh, maybe, you know. Yeah, yeah, go ahead, pick it up. However, like.

[Tolv]

You know, now that we've discussed Gambot, you know, Doug, I was thinking, you are so good with machines. Clearly. Look at happy little Gambard be boopy boop. We have this thaumatech leg from those caves. I don't know if you recall, but, you know, would you be able to put this on Elva?

[Ironclad]

Absolutely. I almost forgot we had that.

[Tolv]

Me too.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Almost.

[Ironclad]

I guess we'll do it right here. You don't need any privacy for this, do you, Elva?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, no.

[Doug Boone]

It's okay. Snap that baby on.

[Natty Wonder]

Doug grabs the leg from Toll. I assume Elva would like sit down.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah.

[Natty Wonder]

Doug takes out one of his little magnifying glasses to make sure he's getting all the proper slots in righty tighty, lefty loosey on all the screws or whatever that would be in there.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, it's advanced technology. Not like anything, anything you're directly familiar with. But, you know, you have a very tinkering background. You're able to figure it out and get Elva's leg reattached.

[Tolv]

My goodness.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Cool.

[Ironclad]

It's like a glove.

[Tolv]

Congratulations. You can do the hokey pokey once again.

[Doug Boone]

Oh, yeah. Just like old times. Here we go, brother. You put your left foot in. You put your left foot out.

[Tolv]

You put your left foot in.

[Doug Boone]

Shake it out.

[Tolv]

Oh, this. This is what we used to do between battles and all the murder sprees. So much joy.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Like smash cut to Doug just sweating.

[Natty Wonder]

Yes.

[Ironclad]

I'm so glad that these family moments are happening and they're reuniting and I.

[Gunther]

Fight for the pain Gigi would absolutely join in on because he just learned what his left and right is.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, yeah. Col, something catch to your eye over Gunther's shoulder. Another sail off in the distance closing quickly on your position on your boat.

[Tolv]

Sail ho up ahead. Look at that big boat. Hopefully this isn't a ghost ship that will make me poop my pants from fear.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It doesn't appear to be a ghost ship, but you may still poop your pants from fear because you recognize this ship. Toll no. It is a long ship with a rusty armor plated hull, a pointed bow and style stern, and a flag of a heart half made of metal. And it's being pulled through the water by an armored giant shark. The side of the ship reads Der Drost in the common tongue. Death rust. But you know it as Ironclad's ship.

[Tolv]

This is like the most inconvenient thing ever. Like, wow, this guy is such a bummer.

[Ironclad]

I mean, you were looking for your other siblings, so.

[Tolv]

Hey, everybody, we're about to have a family reunion.

[Gunther]

Oh, that sounds great.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The ship draws closer and you can hear Ironclad hailing you all to Elva. I'm glad to see you reunited.

[Tolv]

Join me on my quest.

[Gunther]

What's your quest?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Thank you for asking. My quest is to find and reunite all my children and find the islands of Nonimo and of course, the sea drinker before anyone else.

[Gunther]

For good reasons.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Well, of course, I don't think he.

[Gunther]

Do it for good reasons.

[Tolv]

I turn to Alvin. I say, I think we should prepare for battle.

[Gunther]

Oh, no. We just got our health back.

[Doug Boone]

Will you be able to do battle, brother, in your current state?

[Tolv]

Gosh dang it, you're so right.

[Gunther]

No one's seen during this fight.

[Natty Wonder]

Please.

[Doug Boone]

Perhaps we should answer him.

[Tolv]

I will hear what you have to say, Ironclad, but do not think this makes us friends, okay?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh. You see, with my children reunited and the hidden islands found, we can find.

[Elva]

The secrets to eternity.

[Gunther]

Oh, God.

[Tolv]

I guess I. I kind of like, because the Ironclad's in another ship, so I would be, like, whispering to everybody and kind of, like walking amongst them, passing by them, and I say, everybody, just play along. But whatever you do, do not trust Ironclad. Okay, Ironclad, we're about to come aboard.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I'll help you. Come closer. And with that, the ballista fires a giant harpoon at your ship. And right before it impacts, the harpoon splits apart into several different harpoons that all impact your ship. And like a giant winch, the ballista begins pulling you all closer to his ship.

[Tolv]

Dude, I said I was coming aboard. You did not need to damage our ship. What the heck?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I'm just trying to help.

[Ironclad]

Well, that's pretty cool, though.

[Tolv]

That is not help. Does that help? It's like you poke so many holes into the ship. That is. The point of the ship is to not have the holes.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You call that a ship? That's just a glorified dinghy.

[Tolv]

Oh, my God. God, this guy sucks so bad, you don't even know.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Gang, all four of you make me a. What do we call it? Perception checks.

[Elva]

5, 12, 11, 8.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

As your ship is drawn closer to Ironclad ship, like a bunch of little trollings jump over onto your ship. They're like hulky, warty little humanoids, and. And they begin holding out their hands to take your weapons.

[Ironclad]

What if I don't hand this over?

[Gunther]

I mean, I don't. I don't have a weapon to give yet, but you can. You can try and take my child's weapon. I'm not gonna assist with that.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Hand over the weapons or you will get hurt.

[Elva]

You take the weapons and you will get hurt.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No, you get hurt.

[Tolv]

No, you get hurt.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No, you get hurt.

[Tolv]

Okay, what if we, like, meet in the middle and we do not give you our weapons, but promise not to totally stab you to death? Like, we really, really want to promise. Yeah.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

No. Give us your weapons and we won't stab you to death.

[Tolv]

Well, these are, like, the worst crew members ever. You replaced a bunch of cool robots with little troll people? Lame boo trollings. Oh. Oh, my bad.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Wow.

[Natty Wonder]

Could I use my telepathic utterances on these guys?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Sure. What are you gonna do?

[Natty Wonder]

And just say, we don't have to give you our weapons. Just let us aboard?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Oh, you can influence them like that?

[Natty Wonder]

I just, like. Well, I'd like to think, like, they hear it in their head, so they're kind of convinced that it's, like, do it.

[Tolv]

Do it.

[Gunther]

Like, in an intimidating way. How about that?

[Natty Wonder]

I'll do it like Ironclad.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. Make me a deception check.

[Natty Wonder]

I have a negative one to deception 11.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. They start looking around at each other. Did you say that? Oh, did you say that?

[Ironclad]

I. I think your captain Ironclad said that.

[Tolv]

I'm pretty sure I heard him say that.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah. No, he didn't say that. It didn't sound like him at all. Anyway, give us the weapons. They wield their javelins at you. They like shake them at you.

[Tolv]

I think we might have to listen to him, gang. Okay, I'm going to say this as your Admiral. I think we.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You know what?

[Tolv]

How many trollings are there?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Let's say there are six.

[Tolv]

That's not a lot. Yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and smash one with my Vorhammer, you know. Yeah, no, I'm so sorry, but as the admiral, this guy super sucks. And we currently outnumber his trollings. Get ready for a fight game because this is not going to happen.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Yeah, they're not expecting it, you know, they think you're gonna hand over weapons. So go ahead and make a tech roll.

[Tolv]

Okay. First I'm gonna enter a rage though, and then I'm going to use my first.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Since you currently hate violence, you have disadvantage on the attack.

[Tolv]

Oh my God.

[Gunther]

I forgot I was. I was waiting for that.

[Tolv]

Well, that's a Nat 20.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Okay. You'll be able to do it.

[Gunther]

I believe in you. And a.

[Tolv]

Interesting. A critical fail.

[Gunther]

Oh my God.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Dude.

[Natty Wonder]

What if you did it in.

[Ironclad]

A non violent way?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

You swing the hammer down, but you telegraph the move so much that the. The trolling who's standing there is able to hop out of the way. And they all start chanting at each other. Kill them.

[Gunther]

Kill them.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Kill them.

[Gunther]

Giggy chants along.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

What does that sound like? Kill them. Kill them. Kill them. As they begin preparing their javelins to attack you all, you see the seas beneath you begin slowly bubbling and swirling. And very quickly they begin building in intensity. And a massive swirling whirlpool emerges from amongst the waves. It begins pulling you in like a violent vortex and swallowing both ships down into the never ending void. Ham. Anyway, thanks for listening to our podcast. It's over now.

[Ironclad]

Everyone.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Everyone. Everyone's dead.

[Natty Wonder]

Oh, no.

[Gunther]

I was gonna say. Natty holds on to the edge of the boat.

[Natty Wonder]

Doug braces himself.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Find out what happens if there is anything at the bottom of the whirlpool. What's going to happen with these little trollings? And with Ironclad. In the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

[Natty Wonder]

So much lore.

[Tolv]

We were having such a nice moment on the ship and then he had to ruin it all to typical Ironclad. Typical ironclad. Ironclad.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Iron clad. Hey you. Did you know we have a store? That's right. If you want Stinky Dragon merchandise, you can head over to store.stinkydragonpod.com for all your stinky merch needs, including things like Infinite Legends, Merch, Prestidigitation, Spelling T shirt. Love that one. We love all of them. Cancel Barbarians T shirt and more. Go check it out. Anything you purchase there directly supports us and helps us keep making the show. So go visit store.stinkydragonpod.com it can be your good deed for the day. New episodes of TM Stinky Dragon premiere every other Wednesday wherever you stream podcasts and on the Stinky Dragon YouTube channel. Want to listen to show 48 hours early and ad free? Become a patron@stinky dragonpod.com or become a member of Beacon at Beacon TV. Become a patron, you get access to even more exclusive bonus content. You can join community and Discord events and you can get your name shouted out just like Without a trace. Last unicorn knickknack8595 Swedish Devon. Not to be confused with any other Devon and Ancient Tori. These patrons direct support the show and get ad free episodes access to our patron only Discord server bonus content like Second Wind and Behind the Screen and much more. Hey, here's a quick peek from last episode of Second Wind.

[Gunther]

This is very much like the leg conversations. Missing legs have been a thing that's been from the beginning or finding legs and that kind of thing. I guess what I'm asking for is like was I the crazy person or are they the crazy person?

[Tolv]

Here's, here's what happened.

[Gunther]

There's levels of like knowledge that happen.

[Tolv]

And kind of trickle out over through this podcast.

[Gunther]

Yeah, there's me writing it down. There's me later on when I remember.

[Tolv]

Oh, I wrote that down. And then there's also Gus reading it later and be like, yeah, Micah wrote that. Do I know what?

[Gunther]

Do I have the same context? Perspective. Yeah, perspective, context and all that stuff.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

The secret to Stinky Dragon is that this is just one really complicated game of tone.

[Gunther]

It is all the way until it gets to our the player's notebook. That's the like the last bit of information of like the telephone.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I want to clarify for our audience, just to bluntly say it, the metal leg that they have is elva's leg. Correct.

[Tolv]

I just want.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

I just. We've been talking around it, but I want to be bluntly said, because here's the thing. I understood in the moment what it.

[Tolv]

Was, but then you guys.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

Someone Blaine, I think confused it and then that confused me and then I didn't know. And I think since that moment, listening to the episode, I've been confused. And so I just need to know.

[Tolv]

Gaslit Whose leg are they holding on to?

[Gustavo Sorolla]

It's one thing when, like someone is gaslighting you on purpose. It's another thing when you start gaslighting yourself again. That's stinkydragonpod.com we cannot thank you enough for your support that lets us make this show Listeners who interacted with us on the Stinky dragon Discord had NPCs named after him this episode. Like the privateer named after Pitfam 3, voiced by Bernie Burns at Bernie from Rich Peace Morning Somewhere. I know that guy. Elva is voiced by Charlotte Avery at Momshome. Underscore. I know her. Lousy Laskil, named after Alex B007, voiced by Chad James. I know him too. ChadJamesRT from Death Battle. Jarl Ironclad, voiced by Adam Ellis. Adam E. Ellis. You're not gonna believe this. I know him too. Mimur, named after Mia Kimble, voiced by Lindsay Washburn at the Lindsbot. Spoiler. Know her. The Veiled Eye, voiced by Andre Ouelette Krat. I know him. It's amazing. I know so many people. This week's Arrow Question submitted by Faye Bird. This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst, written, edited and composed by Michael Risinger, with additional editing work by Katherine Arnold and David Sonier. And all those people. Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon and find out who else I know.

[Tolv]

Bravissimo.

[Gunther]

Our heroes are finally starting to recall their destiny. The notes are all there, ready for.

[Tolv]

Them to play their part, but they still need help hearing the overture. I think it's time to shelf subtlety in favor of something more fortissimo. Perhaps a vis a vis. But how to break past the wall between us? Wait, that's it.

[Gustavo Sorolla]

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