C03 - Ep. 31 - From On Hyra - Prove One’s Metal

Summary

Tales from the Stinky Dragon

C03 - Ep. 31: "From On Hyra – Prove One’s Metal"

Release Date: November 26, 2025
Host: Gustavo “Gus” Sorola
Players: Barbara Dunkelman, Chris Demaris, John Risinger, Blaine Gibson, Micah Risinger, Eddie Rivas

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Episode Overview

This lively episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon launches the party on a dual mission: to retrieve a stolen relic from the "Font of the Fire Eater" in the industrial outpost of Boiling Bluffs and to investigate mysterious, metallic creatures threatening the area. Along the way, they encounter eccentric NPCs, navigate cultish rituals, and split the party for a descent into drainage tunnels—all while balancing player-driven character growth and a characteristically zany group dynamic.

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Key Discussion Points & Episode Notes

1. Astrology Stereotypes Character Question

(03:04–09:41)
Gus kicks things off with a whimsical “Arrow Question”: What would your character’s zodiac sign be?

• Doug (Barbara): Cancer. Compassionate and sensitive; prefers summer (04:21).
  • “Maybe Doug’s just only soft outside and in. But, you know, it’s just very compassionate.” — Barbara (04:21)
• Natty (John): Capricorn. Chosen for familial themes and the goat symbol, which reminds Natty of her “little baby” (05:13).
• Gunther (Chris): Taurus. Not for horns, but for stubbornness and being “bullheaded” (06:25).
• Tolv (Blaine): Attempts to claim “Big Dipper”; group suggests Pisces; Tolv relates more to following stars than traditional astrology (07:29–09:13).
  • “I find myself a bit of a Big Dipper. ... I'm keeping my options open. I have many spoons to give to my team.” — Blaine as Tolv (07:29)
• Group Chemistry: A warm, teasing exchange; players riff off each other’s choices with good-natured jokes.

2. Character Moments & Roleplaying

(09:55–13:16)
Players reflect on invention, personal inspiration, and sibling relationships.

• Doug expresses inventing hesitance and regret. Tolv reassures Doug (10:00–10:19).
  • “The past is just that. It’s time to move forward and learn and grow.” — Blaine as Tolv (10:07)
• Gunther receives his first “inspiration die” for roleplaying a monologue about sibling rivalry (12:02).

3. Rest Transition & Barracks Humor

(13:20–17:00)
The crew prepares for rest, with Tolv volunteering to "gargoyle" atop Doug's nightstand and serve as a thunderstorm-sound machine.

• “If you want, I can just kind of crouch on it. Like a goblin. Like a gargoyle. Would this make you feel comfortable?” — Blaine as Tolv (14:33)
• Red-eyed, nightlight gag that becomes the episode’s “thumbnail” joke (15:26–15:41).

4. Briefing, Marching Order, and Mission Goals

(16:03–23:13)

• Sgt. Steel Eye enters, scolding the party back onto duty (16:03).
• Mission: Investigate metallic creatures attacking oil miners and stealing relics from the Fire Eater temple.
• Marching order decided: Tolv, Gunther, Natty, Doug—plus Captain Grumbles, Natty’s animated companion (23:13–23:42).

5. Strange Encounter: Zephyr Blake the Magician

(25:09–40:00)

• Party spots a magician with tentacles, a top hat, and a giant eye chasing a rabbit.
• Reality shifts; most characters are “cursed” to abhor violence or fear the dark for the session.
• Gunther uses his tongue to catch the rabbit, which is revealed to be rabid.
• The magician (revealed as Zephyr Blake) thanks them and vanishes.
  • “Tell everyone you’ve met the great Zephyr Blake!” — Zephyr (39:50)

6. Arrival in Boiling Bluffs & Meeting Flack

(41:08–46:44)

• The city is busy with oil processing, featuring burning lamps and industrial chaos.
• Flack, a panicked gnome Fire Master, explains that the Fire Opal (of Fireballs) has been stolen by mysterious blue-gray metallic creatures.
  • “Yeah, it was the Fire Opal of Fireballs. You've probably heard of it.” — Flack (47:55)
• Flack offers a tour of the temple, listing features: burning oil font, beds, steam room, kitchen slab, and reliquary for relics.

7. Investigating the Temple (Font of the Fire Eater)

(47:55–65:43)

• The party gets the rundown on the stolen opal—magical, powerful, and symbolic (49:02).
• Tolv’s shield glows faintly in proximity to Thaumatech, hinting at more metallic beings nearby (44:09–44:35).
• Gunther uses a magical item to track the opal—ink leads toward the steam room (52:17–53:36).

8. Cult Initiation: The Kindlekin Ritual

(55:50–79:30)

• Natty joins the meditating “Kindlekin” priests, must prove herself via three trials:
  1. Walking on Hot Coals: Fill shoes with coals for a day (61:35).
  2. Burning Belongings: Randomly burn three personal items, including Natty’s treasured autoharp (69:10–71:51).
  3. Tongs of Tongues: Split her tongue with ritual tongs for a three-pronged fork; must now speak with a lisp (72:23–73:56).
• Rewards: “Boon of Tamed Flame,” welfare at the font, and solidarity ("hot stuff" and "fiery friends") (76:07).

9. Tunnel Investigation: The Split Party

(79:30–88:05)

• Using bugbear traits and magical lights, Doug and Gunther (disguised as "Munther") descend into a narrow drain after finding blue-gray metal evidence (81:22–81:40).
• Natty and Tolv remain behind; Gigi (animated creature) may join as the group’s “drain avatar.”
• The tunnel forks; Doug detects the trail by smell, while a mysterious voice sounds from the other direction (87:23–88:05).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “You do not seek the power. The power seeks you. You are perfect for it.” — Blaine as Tolv to Gunther (18:50)
• “That was a typo. That was a holdover from an earlier draft.” — Gus, breaking the fourth wall (07:05)
• “If you hurt that rabbit, I'll fight you. I'll fight you.” — Blaine as Tolv, channeling antiviolence (25:23)
• “Tongue of tongues, and a blade of your choosing. Do the deed, you will certainly bleed.” — Kindlekin Priest (72:23)
• *“Mama, look up,” Natty instructs Gigi, her demonic child, to witness the ritual (74:02)

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Important Timestamps

• Astrology Question: 03:04–09:41
• Gunther’s Sibling Monologue: 12:02–12:33
• Barracks Gags (Tolv as Gargoyle): 14:33–15:41
• Mission Recap & Orders: 16:03–23:13
• Zephyr Blake Encounter: 25:09–40:00
• First Appearance in Boiling Bluffs: 41:08
• Font Introduction by Flack: 46:19–47:55
• Tracking the Fire Opal: 52:12–53:36
• Steam Room / Kindlekin Rituals: 55:50–79:30
• Splitting the Party (Drain Descent): 79:30–88:05

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Flow & Tone

The group’s trademark blend of irreverent banter, characterization, meta-humor, and adventure gameplay shines throughout. GM Gus adeptly balances D&D storytelling with improv, frequently encouraging the players’ comedic instincts (and suffering the consequences with tongue-twisting NPC roles and fourth-wall breaks).

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For New Listeners

This episode encapsulates what Tales from the Stinky Dragon does best: blending deep character moments and inventive roleplay with humorous, high-fantasy adventure; no prior campaign knowledge required. You’ll find magical mysteries, peculiar NPCs, cultist shenanigans, laugh-out-loud jokes, and a climactic cliffhanger poised to launch the next episode.

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Cliffhanger: Doug and Gunther, deep in the drains beneath the temple, face a split tunnel—one side reeks with metallic scent; the other, a mysterious voice calls out. Stay tuned!

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Next episode: Who’s in the drain? Will Natty’s new tongue heal? Is Zephyr Blake friend or foe? And will the party retrieve the burning opal—or combust from within?

Transcript

[Gus Sorola]

All right, remember, the machine knows if you're lying. First statement. Carvana will give you a real offer on your car. All online. False.

[Chris Demaris]

True.

[Gus Sorola]

Actually, you can sell your car in minutes. False.

[Blaine Gibson]

That's gotta be true again.

[Gus Sorola]

Carvana will pick up your car from your door, or you can drop it off at one of their car vending machines.

[John Risinger]

Sounds too good to be true. So true.

[Gus Sorola]

Finally caught on. Nice job. Honesty isn't just their policy, it's their entire model. Sell your car today too, Carvana. Pickup fees may apply. Give big, save big with rack Friday deals at Nordstrom Rack.

[John Risinger]

For a limited time, take an extra.

[Gus Sorola]

40% off red tag clearance for a.

[John Risinger]

Total Savings up to 75% off.

[Gus Sorola]

Save on gifts for everyone on your.

[John Risinger]

List from brands like Vince Cole, Haan.

[Gus Sorola]

Sam Edelman and more.

[John Risinger]

All sales final and restrictions apply.

[Gus Sorola]

The best stuff goes fast, so bring your gift list and your wish list.

[John Risinger]

To your nearest Nordstrom rack today.

[Gus Sorola]

If we knew more about our sleep, what would we do differently? Would we go to bed at a consistent time or take steps to reduce interruptions to our sleep? With the all new Sleep score, Apple Watch measures your bedtime consistency, interruptions and sleep duration. Then every morning it combines these factors into an easy to understand score from 1 to 100. So you'll know how to take the quality of your sleep from good to excellent. Introducing the new Sleep score on Apple Watch iPhone 11 or later required.

[Eddie Rivas]

Very nice to meet you. All you voiceless talkers flailingly fly into the Stinky Dragon and imbibe our latest.

[Gus Sorola]

That's.

[John Risinger]

That's loud.

[Eddie Rivas]

I can no one else hear that?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh.

[Eddie Rivas]

Oh, it's you. Yes, I hear.

[Gus Sorola]

Mm.

[Eddie Rivas]

And do you want lemon with. Got it. No lemon. Okay. Anything else?

[Gus Sorola]

Like.

[Eddie Rivas]

Sure, sure, sure. We can get you pre flayed brain. No, I don't need to write it down.

[Gus Sorola]

I can remember. Oh, and you're. You're gone.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay.

[Eddie Rivas]

Previously, B team's briefing at Fort Andridge was suddenly shattered by a pair of peculiar pugilists. The conjoined Rene Suess. These fighting figures focused on Gunther forcing his friends futile fighting to the wayside. When Gunther was decidedly disarmed, the duo divulged. They were actually disjoined and designated a destined destination. A delayed reunion with Bunlap at Skyblue Falls Prison. Whilst resting, Doug was visited by the Veiled Eye, who mandated a meetup in Mido Canyon with his many mechanisms. Nab some nectar and nestle in for a noxious narrative.

[Gus Sorola]

Hello, everyone. Welcome to Tales from the Stinky Dragon. I'm your dungeon master, Gustavo Sorola, and I'm gonna hit our four players with an arrow. Sure. Following astrology stereotypes, what would your character's zodiac sign be? And that's submitted by Laura Marstar. All right, everyone, roll that D20.

[Micah Risinger]

Excellent question, by the way.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah.

[Chris Demaris]

Yes. 2.

[Blaine Gibson]

I rolled a 1.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

17.

[John Risinger]

4.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, so it seems like we have Doug first with 17, then Natty with 4, Gunther with 2, then Tolv with 1. All right, lead us off, Doug.

[Micah Risinger]

You got it. Well, hello, everyone. I am Barbara Dunkelman, and I play Doug Boone, the artificer. Bugbear Battlesmith.

[Gus Sorola]

Artificer.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Boon.

[Gus Sorola]

Boon.

[Blaine Gibson]

You gotta get that plosive.

[Micah Risinger]

Boon beats Battlestar.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

And, you know, it's funny because Doug actually has learned a lot about the zodiacs and all the different astrology signs and everything like that, and part of his studies, and I'm not going to tell you what Doug actually is, but the one that Doug is probably relates to the most, it's got an unfortunate name, but it's Cancer.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

The reason is, is Cancers are typically, you know, very caring, very, you know, a little bit emotional. Might have, like, a harder exterior but a soft interior, whereas maybe Doug's just only soft outside and in. But, you know, it's just very compassionate. You know, gets a little bit emotional from time to time. And, yeah, he also likes the summer months, so being born in July would be pretty cool.

[Blaine Gibson]

Are you crabby? Do you go good with butter?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I don't appreciate those jokes, Toad. I don't want to be eaten. Okay. I know you're hungry. I know it's first thing in the morning.

[Blaine Gibson]

I don't eat.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

That's very true.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, Doug Cancer. Good to know. Good match for you. Terrible name, though. All right, who's up next? I think we had Natty with four.

[John Risinger]

Yeah. Hi, I'm John Risinger. I play Natty Wonder, who is a drought warlock, drag queen, and mother of the bringer of the end of all times. And I don't. I don't necessarily subscribe to the zodiacs. I'm going to admit I don't really know much about them, but I was looking at them, like, if I had to, like, pick one that I associate with the most, I got to go with them. Capricorns, mostly because of superficial reasons. Like, the little sign is, like, this little goat with horns, and it reminds me my little baby with his little horns. And so I like that. And then also, it's apparently that they're like, they love, like, family and music and traditions, and so I'm like, okay, I'll go with that as well. And, yeah, it's just. It also makes sense that their. Their sign is, like, the end of the year and the beginning of the year. So I kind of like that with me and my baby, you know?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, yeah.

[John Risinger]

So that's. That's. That's what I'm gonna go with.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

The beginning of the end.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, I began the end.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, Capricorn for Natty. Writing these all down. Thanks, Natty. Gunther, I think you were up next.

[Chris Demaris]

Yes. I'm Chris Demaris and I play Gunther, the male crook folk fighter. And for me, I would say that I might be as Taurus because they say that Tauruses are stubborn and bullheaded and can get stuck in a rut. But though I do not have horns. Please do not say I do. I also do not like cows.

[Micah Risinger]

I like how you paused, thinking we might say that you have horns. Please don't say I do.

[John Risinger]

The script that we all read for these shows did say paus reaction.

[Gus Sorola]

That was a. That was a typo. That was a holdover from an earlier draft.

[John Risinger]

Okay, cool, cool, cool. I'm glad we sent that into the writer's room a little bit longer.

[Gus Sorola]

So Taurus because you're bullheaded, but not because you have horns?

[Chris Demaris]

Yes.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay.

[Micah Risinger]

That's what I would have given him as well.

[Gus Sorola]

All right. Yeah. Very, very stubborn. Yeah, I'll grant that. All right, thanks, Gunther. And last up, I believe we got to.

[Blaine Gibson]

Hello, it's me, To. Played by Blaine Gibson and Yoohoo. Good day. All in for my astrology star things. I find myself a bit of a big dipper. You know, I'm. I'm out there looking for my little dipper. You know, I'm keeping my options open. I have mini spoons to give to my team. You know, I can. You can fill me up and. Why is everybody looking? Yes, Daddy, yes.

[John Risinger]

Question. Yeah. Did you just say you're looking for, like, a romantic relationship with someone? That's new news to me. I like that.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm open to options, you know, Idea. Who knows? I don't know.

[Chris Demaris]

Single.

[Blaine Gibson]

I didn't ask. I didn't.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I don't think you're his type.

[Chris Demaris]

Okay.

[Blaine Gibson]

So, yeah, I'm. I'm. I consider myself a big dipper.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, that's. That's not a thing. I thought that's what you were gonna say, John.

[John Risinger]

I mean, I. I took that and. But. And what's the joke?

[Gus Sorola]

I.

[John Risinger]

Stop it, you big dummy. I took that as the joke. But the other is, I'm interested in, like, him revealing things about himself, because that's the whole point of these things. We're supposed to learn a little something about each other. I learned something new, so I want clarification. Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

A Big Dipper.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I think the obvious answer for 12 would be Pisces.

[Blaine Gibson]

Because I.

[Gus Sorola]

Why? Because.

[Blaine Gibson]

Am I a good chef or something?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Water sign. And, oh, you know, you also. You also, you know, wear your heart on your sleeve as well. I got a little bit of motions going.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay. Yeah, I'm open to this. I mean, my manufacture date was May 14th. It says right here on my arm, if you revealed the skin, I think that that's technically a Taurus, but, you know, I don't know astrology. I follow the stars for, you know, the boat and navigation things. And I've always liked the Big Dipper, so that's what I relate to.

[Gus Sorola]

With your guiding star.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

The one is the Big Dipper with the North Star.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, it is.

[John Risinger]

Okay. I just like the idea of Tolv making his guiding star one of the ones that moves constantly.

[Gus Sorola]

It's one of the ones in the Big Dipper, but not the North Star.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's another one.

[John Risinger]

Yeah. It's not the constellation. Isn't that right?

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

She just gets out on the ocean. It goes in circles.

[Micah Risinger]

It's efficient.

[Gus Sorola]

All right. Thanks. Thanks, Tolva. Always a laugh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Said with the straightest. Always a laugh.

[Gus Sorola]

Always a laugh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Blaine, that was hilarious.

[Micah Risinger]

You crack me up.

[Gus Sorola]

Such a hoot.

[Blaine Gibson]

I sense you have something in your heart waiting to be made, Doug.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I guess I just don't feel as inspired lately. Some of my inventions in the past have. Have caused so much pain, and I guess I'm just afraid.

[Blaine Gibson]

Well, the past is just that. It's time to move forward and learn and grow. I have faith in you, Duck Boon, that you'll be able to do whatever you set your mind to.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Want to give me, like, a little clue or a little hint, maybe?

[John Risinger]

Map?

[Blaine Gibson]

Uh, yeah. Wait, what was your name again? Doug Boone. That's right. I was going to say that bug dude. Doug Boone. It's hard for me to keep track. When you come to Meo Canyon, we'll discuss it further. But if I forget your name, please don't take insult.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

What's going on with you?

[John Risinger]

Same brother.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's difficult for me to keep track of time. The future and the present are all mixed together for me.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Time's taking notes so I can keep track of this.

[Blaine Gibson]

Maybe I Should do that.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I do recommend it.

[John Risinger]

The Veiled Eye is Cristamaris.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I wanna.

[Micah Risinger]

I wanna use my thingamajig.

[Blaine Gibson]

Mido Canyon. I'll see you there, Doug.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Okay. I will meet you at Nido Canyon. Easy enough to remember, small puffs of.

[Gus Sorola]

Clouds begin converging around your face, and they tickle your nose and you sneeze.

[John Risinger]

Aww.

[Gus Sorola]

With a sneeze, Doug, you snap back to reality and you find yourself standing at the workshop. And Gunther's just talking to you.

[Chris Demaris]

And so I say, don't you dare take that bug. That is my bug. But, you know, what do you do?

[Gus Sorola]

What do you do?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, that's really. That's a quite typical that you're in, Gunther.

[John Risinger]

Yes.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, I was listening that whole time, for sure.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. Chris, go and take an inspiration. Die for.

[Chris Demaris]

Yes.

[Gus Sorola]

Ending that conversation. That was. That was a really good. Really good performance.

[Blaine Gibson]

Well done, Gunther. Your first inspiration. Die of the campaign. You've done it.

[Chris Demaris]

But you know how it is, Doug. Siblings.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yes. Yeah. Siblings. Yeah, they're really great, aren't they?

[Chris Demaris]

No. Because they take your bugs.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, they might take your bugs and they might, you know, like, pick on you and stuff, but. Yes, but the happy times are, you know, you gotta hold on tight to them.

[Chris Demaris]

They certainly are. Lots of happy times. Yes.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah.

[Chris Demaris]

Yes.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You have a lot of siblings, don't you?

[Chris Demaris]

Oh, yes. And I love them all. I would cherish them so much.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

That's nice.

[Blaine Gibson]

Open wound. Open wound.

[Chris Demaris]

Oh, yes, yes, yes. But I do not like them. Glad to be away. All right.

[John Risinger]

Smooth.

[Gus Sorola]

Just like me. Gunther. I feel like I'm seeing a little bit of myself here.

[Micah Risinger]

Don, you look really confused. What's up?

[John Risinger]

It's just my default. I'm just confused. Don't worry about me. I'll figure it out.

[Micah Risinger]

I mean, you're wearing it on your face real big.

[John Risinger]

It's just me watching Gunther traverse a touchy subject, that's all.

[Micah Risinger]

They suck.

[Gus Sorola]

All right. Unless you all have any other downtime activities you want to do. I think that about wraps it up if you all want to take a rest, call it a night or push on.

[John Risinger]

Oh, we weren't resting already. I figured if Doug had that in a vision, was it a dream or was it a vision?

[Gus Sorola]

It was, like, in the middle. It was like a vision. While he was working a vision quest.

[John Risinger]

He checked out for a moment.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. We've all been there. Yeah.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

Okay.

[Blaine Gibson]

What?

[John Risinger]

Yeah, I suppose a rest would be nice.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

Because we get to sleep in our bunks.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, that's that's exactly I was going to say, y' all can sleep in the barracks and take like a proper full long rest if you so wish.

[John Risinger]

It's such a good long rest. You're going to give us temporary HP points, right?

[Gus Sorola]

No, I'll just give you back the normal amount you would get from a long rest.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay, guys, now that everybody knows that I am a thaumatech, I can finally stop pretending to be asleep. So I'm going to go power down in the corner. So if you see me just there zoning out, do not fear. I'm just in sentinel shut eye mode. It's no big deal, really.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Can you actually maybe just like watch me sleep tolve if you're going to be up anyways?

[Blaine Gibson]

I mean, yeah, why not? I mean, do you have a preference on where you want me to be put?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You know, just, you know, nearby so you can see if anything weird happens to me or if I look like I'm in maybe like a trance or a dream that's disturbing me?

[Blaine Gibson]

So you have this nightstand here. If you want, I can just kind of crouch on it. Like a goblin. Like a gargoyle. Would this make you feel comfortable? Yes. And I'll open my eyes big and bright so you can see that I am watching.

[John Risinger]

Do you have a setting for. For playing White Noise?

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, I do. Yes, yes, yes. So here we go.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Are you going to pass out?

[John Risinger]

What?

[Blaine Gibson]

Did you say something?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I was going to ask if you could maybe play Thunderstorms instead.

[John Risinger]

Okay. Okay.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It's much better.

[Gus Sorola]

What?

[Blaine Gibson]

Everyone's looking at me. I'm done.

[Gus Sorola]

I'm done.

[Chris Demaris]

What's the matter?

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm so confused.

[John Risinger]

Natty's already asleep. That's perfect. Natty's out.

[Gus Sorola]

I like to think that to's eyes also turn red and glow like a nightlight. So with like glowing evil looking red eyes making that demonic sound, they actually.

[John Risinger]

Display digital readouts of the time. Yeah, yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

This one's hours and this one's minutes.

[Gus Sorola]

And we've got our thumbnail for the episode.

[John Risinger]

Just a gargoyle mouth agape, staring at Doug sleeping.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay, you all are snugly asleep, except for Tolf, who's making a demonic sound.

[Blaine Gibson]

Stop.

[Micah Risinger]

Doug goes ahead and hits off the alarm clock.

[Blaine Gibson]

Activated.

[Gus Sorola]

Well, your alarm clock doesn't have a chance to go off because shakes you from your slumber is a sergeant Steel Eye who angrily enters the room berating everyone. Me Team what in tarnation happened to me? What did you all do?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You took a little nap.

[Gus Sorola]

I took A little nap. Just like you're taking a nap. Oversleeping? Not making it to your next assignment?

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, pretty much, yeah. I came and talked to you while you were asleep.

[Gus Sorola]

I do remember that. Thank you, Toll. Give me a. Yeah.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Thank you.

[Blaine Gibson]

Do you need a white noise machine?

[Gus Sorola]

No. You sleepy heads. I've already set your privates ahead to me. Okay. The scout. Do you remember what your mission is?

[Chris Demaris]

All too well good.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Go for it, Gunther. Lay it on him.

[Blaine Gibson]

A beautiful song.

[Gus Sorola]

Wow. Sounds like white noise.

[Chris Demaris]

To go to the boiling bluffs. Because their metal creatures are attacking oil miners and stealing relics from the fire eater temple.

[Blaine Gibson]

Also their bees.

[Chris Demaris]

They're bees.

[Gus Sorola]

Is your mission to be a beekeeper, son?

[Chris Demaris]

No.

[Gus Sorola]

Are you gonna harvest honey, put in a little jar, sell it at a farmer's market?

[Chris Demaris]

That sounds lovely.

[Gus Sorola]

But wow, it's not your mission.

[Blaine Gibson]

Did you just reveal your retirement plan, Sergeant Sea Lie? That sounds very nice.

[Gus Sorola]

Get to the front line.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You got it, sir. Let's go team. Right away. Up and at him.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're going, we're going, we're going. Hut two, hut two.

[Gus Sorola]

Leaving me asleep in the war room. If we put my hand warm water, it's not gonna work on me. Not my first time falling asleep.

[Micah Risinger]

We look down, he just has like a urine stain.

[Blaine Gibson]

Fresh.

[Gus Sorola]

And that's our alternate thumbnail pee pee pants. Okay, what's the plan here, Natty? You're in charge, right?

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

I feel like I've been in charge for quite a while. And so I could probably relinquish control. So I don't have to worry about that anymore. Who gave it to me? I think Tolve gave it to me. Or maybe Gunther gave it to.

[Eddie Rivas]

Or Doug.

[Blaine Gibson]

I think I gave it to Doug. Doug gave it to you.

[John Risinger]

Okay, if. Math.

[Blaine Gibson]

Maths. I think it's gotta go to Gunther.

[John Risinger]

Okay, then I bequeath to Gunther.

[Chris Demaris]

I accept. But with reluctance. And dishonor.

[Gus Sorola]

Dishonor.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Dishonor.

[Blaine Gibson]

Why dishonor?

[Chris Demaris]

I don't know. I do not feel so I should leave. But I shall accept it.

[Blaine Gibson]

Well, I mean, Gunther, we're going to try to. Don't tell steel like this. But we're going to go straight to see your friend Bunlap. So this is your chance to gain back your honor. Wear it with pride.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You know what they say. The best leaders are the reluctant ones.

[John Risinger]

That's right.

[Blaine Gibson]

You do not seek the power. The power seeks you. You are perfect for it.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, Gunther. What is. What's the plan? How are you going to approach this?

[Chris Demaris]

So straight ahead there's Boiling Bluffs, but along that route is Meadow Canyon. Right.

[Gus Sorola]

So you're in Fort Indridge. Meadow Canyon is three hexes away, so about 18 miles.

[Chris Demaris]

Okay.

[Gus Sorola]

From where you are, the next immediate places you go to, you have two options. You could either go to Boiling Bluffs or Copia Convent.

[Chris Demaris]

Or the convent. That's where the mother.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, I know this. I know this. I talked to her. It is non convent priestess Chess.

[Gus Sorola]

Hey, look at you.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, we haven't thought about her for many, many weeks.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, I talked to her. She sounds like this very dreamy. Oh, kind of wispy voice. I hope we can get that voice actor back.

[Gus Sorola]

You know, the Copia convent is a small convent of nuns devoted to the fruit bearer and the bees knees when it comes to leather working and tanning bees.

[John Risinger]

Since we're talking geography. So we've got. We've got the Boiling Bluffs and then Meo Canyons. After Boiling Bluffs, where is Sky Blue Falls Prison in correlation to all that?

[Gus Sorola]

It's also on the way. It's like you would get there on the other side of either of these options.

[John Risinger]

Okay, okay, okay. So it is between those options and Mito Canyon.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. Meo Canyon is. Is three away. So it's like immediately next to Copia Comet. And then you could do Sky Blue Falls Prison after that. On the way.

[John Risinger]

Well, then it would sound like we should head to Boiling Bluffs since that is in fact our mission direction. And then we can get somehow. Well, I guess we got two options. We can go Boiling Bluffs and try to like, like, you know, like when they were playing football and they try to just go right through the defense to get to where they want to go. Or we could go to the convent and try to circ. I'm saying this without Steel Eye listening. I've pushed him away because now I'm talking about not doing orders. We could go to the convention and maybe that gets around the front line. So to do any sort of the. The arm stuff. It's funny because we're soldiers and we can go to all of our other little side quests.

[Chris Demaris]

I believe we should go to Boiling Bluffs.

[John Risinger]

You're in charge.

[Chris Demaris]

Because also the seed drinker is curious to talk to the fire eater.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, the fire starter. Yeah, wicked fire starter. The eater.

[John Risinger]

Sorry.

[Chris Demaris]

Yes.

[John Risinger]

You were really confident with that. You were just right up there. What? All right, so we're going to Boiling.

[Blaine Gibson]

Bluffs before we leave the camp. What is this called? The room that we're in barracks.

[Gus Sorola]

Barracks.

[Blaine Gibson]

Before we leave the barracks, Doug, pretend to trip me.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, okay. Yeah. No questions asked. Here we go.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay. Sol starts to work his way over to a team's bunks and just thrashes around, knocking him over.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, no.

[Ad Voice]

Oh, no.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Killing me.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

So we're the only ones in here.

[Blaine Gibson]

I know, I know. I just needed in case there's, like, you know, steel eyes watching through a window or something. You know, I just. I need to make it look like an accident. But to heck with a team, really?

[Gus Sorola]

You know, lucky for you, they're not there. They already woke up and they're out.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You stuck it to them to demerit.

[Chris Demaris]

For not cleaning bunk beds.

[Gus Sorola]

To Damaris. That's too many demerits.

[Chris Demaris]

No one wants that many.

[Blaine Gibson]

Am I in trouble? Is this a thing that goons.

[Chris Demaris]

No, this is to a team.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh.

[Eddie Rivas]

Oh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yes, yes, yes. Bad day, team.

[Chris Demaris]

All right, let us go on. Not the double. Just the single.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

On the single. Here we go.

[John Risinger]

There we go.

[Blaine Gibson]

Do we have, like, a fun marching song? Natty, have you considered making a marching song as you resident musician?

[John Risinger]

Soldiers go by marching One by one the soldiers go by marching and they're having so much fun the soldiers, they go marching and they're doing all their stuff and they go Soldiers go marching to the boiling bluff.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's good.

[John Risinger]

That was fun.

[Gus Sorola]

That's the cat. You win. Okay, so it is early in the day. Since you all just took a rest and you've spent some time here at Fort Endrich. What is your marching order? Gunther, why don't you tell me what the marching order here is?

[Chris Demaris]

It shall be told. And then me and then Natty. And then, yes, on the behind, it shall be dug.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Excellent. You got it, Sir.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yes, sir.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

On your behind.

[John Risinger]

And just to make it explicitly clear, I have, in fact, continued to recast animate the dead. So Captain Grumbles continues to wander, and then Grumbles shall.

[Gus Sorola]

That is an excellent point. I've been meaning to bring that up. You know, you said you recast it. I want to make sure you burn the spell slot for that as well.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm happy to.

[John Risinger]

Happy to. Worth it.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Why did I make you a ring of spell slot refilling if you're just gonna use it on this guy?

[John Risinger]

Every time I put my hand around Captain Groves, like so we can keep this guy around. I love him.

[Blaine Gibson]

Skin slopping. Yeah, he's just so gross and degraded.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

At this point, guys. He gives me the heebie jeebies.

[Blaine Gibson]

Maybe Captain Grumbles can, like, stay around but like 10ft in the direction that the wind is blowing so that we do not catch skin as well. Yeah, but I take care of mine. That you do not talk.

[John Risinger]

You don't think I got products to take care of Captain Grumbles.

[Blaine Gibson]

Maybe he's born with it. Maybe it's Bjorn skin.

[John Risinger]

I am aiming for a blue fairy. I'm a real boy. Situation with Captain Grumble someday. That's what I'm aiming for.

[Gus Sorola]

He was already alive and real at.

[John Risinger]

One point, but now he's a whole new person. He swears he takes care of Gigi. He's just like, we've made a new person.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's also a beautiful friendship because he's so started as an enemy, but now he is our friend, you know, sure, there's necromancy involved, but, you know, isn't that beautiful?

[Gus Sorola]

All right.

[Blaine Gibson]

You old dog.

[John Risinger]

See, you love him. Gus.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, why doesn't everyone go and make me a perception check? Okay, sure.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Why not? Got it.

[Micah Risinger]

12, 30, 20 dirty 20.

[John Risinger]

Twinsies. Seven.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay, so two dirty 20s, a 12 and a seven. Doug and Natty, as you all are, you two are number three and four in line, aren't you? The back of the pack. As you all are, you know, marching, making your way away from Fort Andridge. You know, you've been Milwaukee for a little while. Port Interest is just a speck behind you. You see something out of the corner of your eye kind of off to the left from you all. Seems like almost like a disturbance, like a puff of dirt moving around.

[John Risinger]

Like on ground level.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. And, you know, you focus a little more and look at it, and it looks like someone's chasing a rabbit.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Chasing a rabbit.

[John Risinger]

Okay, how far away?

[Gus Sorola]

Not terribly far. 100ft maybe. And as you know, you're staring at them, you start to make out more details on the figure that's chasing the rabbit. It looks like it's wearing a top hat and it's holding maybe a wand of some kind in one of its hands. Wait, it's weird. It has like tentacles and one giant eye in the middle.

[John Risinger]

So the creature is. The body is like a giant eye surrounded by tentacles.

[Gus Sorola]

A giant eye with tentacles and tentacular eye stalks.

[John Risinger]

Wait, what?

[Micah Risinger]

Meta talk here for a second. What did Zuzu Top look like?

[Gus Sorola]

Everyone make a reality check.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, borrow Zuzu Top.

[Micah Risinger]

Zuzu Top is from the Grotesque campaign.

[Blaine Gibson]

An Aubrey.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

The.

[Micah Risinger]

A brilliant who did the magic show at the beginning of the campaign.

[Blaine Gibson]

Very good, Barbara.

[John Risinger]

What's the reality check? Again.

[Gus Sorola]

So what you're going to do is you're going to roll a D20 and add all of your ability score modifiers, which is strength, dexterity, constitution, intelligence, wisdom, and charisma farts.

[Chris Demaris]

Do we add the negatives?

[Gus Sorola]

Yes.

[John Risinger]

Crit fail.

[Gus Sorola]

30, 14, 29.

[Chris Demaris]

When you were talking about a magician, I was thinking it was that one bartender, the old man bartender who talks like a magician.

[Micah Risinger]

Oh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Remind me what he sounded like again, though, guys.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, one more time.

[Gus Sorola]

We'll pull up the audio for you for that. All right, so 29, 30, 14, and a 1. Yep. 1.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm proud of that.

[Gus Sorola]

I think he didn't add his modifiers.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, it'd be a 10.

[Gus Sorola]

Just for the record, crit fail all. And crit success is only on, like, attack rolls. When you make your skill checks, you can still add everything. Like, it's not an Automatic fail with a one, an automatic success with a 20. But if you're older. One. That's probably not good anyway.

[John Risinger]

Okay, it was a 10.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, Natty, you did okay. Everyone else, not so much.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I got 29.

[Blaine Gibson]

29.

[Micah Risinger]

It's one less than natty.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, but you have to add 12 to your roll.

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah, I rolled a 17.

[Gus Sorola]

It's pretty good. 30 was the number we were looking for, so only Natty is okay.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Dang.

[Gus Sorola]

So now I got to make a few rolls.

[Micah Risinger]

That dang minus one charisma got me.

[John Risinger]

I actually don't have any negative modifiers.

[Micah Risinger]

That's good.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's as if you cheated on your roles.

[Micah Risinger]

I've had plenty of characters without negatives.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, so have I. I don't know.

[John Risinger]

What you're talking about, Blaine.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm special. I'm nuanced. I have ups, I have downs. I'm human.

[John Risinger]

Well, I'm not.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm a thaumatech.

[Gus Sorola]

Seeing this creature kind of makes your brain hurt from, you know, like, inside, and it doesn't quite make any sense. And as a result of seeing this disconcerting image, Doug and Tolv, you have this sick feeling in the pit of your stomach, and you absolutely cannot stand. You abhor violence. You want to do everything possible to avoid violence.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, nothing's changed for me.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, God.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh. Oh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Control.

[John Risinger]

Alt.

[Gus Sorola]

Delete.

[Blaine Gibson]

What is happening to my processor?

[Micah Risinger]

But, I mean, would that apply to Gunther and to. Would they have to roll at all because they didn't technically perceive this person?

[Gus Sorola]

Yes.

[Micah Risinger]

Okay.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm a bit of an empath. Okay, Barbara? You know, if I just feel the.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Vibe of the room, maybe you all.

[Gus Sorola]

Cancel Then yeah, they will be affected by it.

[Micah Risinger]

Okay, and is there a condition metagame wise?

[Gus Sorola]

No. For the rest of this session, you're just gonna role play as if your characters hate violence.

[Chris Demaris]

Okay, but not me.

[Gus Sorola]

Not you.

[Blaine Gibson]

Gunther, you pooped your pants.

[Gus Sorola]

You pulled a steel eye. Gunther, you get a chill down your spine.

[Chris Demaris]

It's cold.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, it is cold. You want to avoid darkness whenever possible. You're afraid of the dark.

[Chris Demaris]

Now I shall keep my eyes open.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

That's a good plan.

[Blaine Gibson]

I start singing that one song by the darkness.

[John Risinger]

Gunther.

[Gus Sorola]

It's the darkness.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh no.

[Gus Sorola]

So for the rest of the session, Gunther, you are afraid of the dark. And all three of you, whenever anything pertaining to violence or darkness comes up, you have disadvantage on any role.

[Micah Risinger]

But not Natty regarding that.

[Gus Sorola]

No, Natty's fine. Natty kind of squints and looks at the strange looking magician following the rabbit and she like, you know, rubs her eyes and looks again and realizes that what she saw was not of this world. Maybe not from this reality. It's a. It's some kind of weird illusion. Then after rubbing her eyes, she looks again and the magician appears totally mundane, like a normal human being chasing a rabbit.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Still a weird thing for us to be finding as we walk through this place. Just a magician playing with the bunny.

[John Risinger]

Can I approach the magician since I'm not scared of anything?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, meta wise. Just because of this, this weird reality bending situation. Natty, the only thing that happens to you is you get disadvantage on your next roll.

[John Risinger]

Well, poop on you.

[Blaine Gibson]

Got him. Hey, it's Blaine. The holiday season is approaching and I have a question for you. Do you know what you're giving your parents for the holidays? Because I do. It's aura frames. It's the easiest gift to give them because it's super personalized. Did you know you can send an aura frame with videos and pictures preloaded to it? That's. That's so simple. And you don't have to like take all the time to set it up and all that stuff. It can come with all your photos like already downloaded onto it. So right out of the box. Perfectly usable, perfectly personalized. You know, my parents are always like, Blaine, we love you so much. You're our favorite son. You're the best son in the whole wide world. So why not give them the gift of me? You know, I can just take all these photos and put it on there. And also like throughout the year, I can effortlessly upload photos and videos straight from my phone all year long so that they can stay in touch with my life and they've got like a nice curated batch of photos of me, their best boy. So for a limited time visit or frames.com and get $45 off or as best selling Carver Matte free Frames named number one by Wirecutter by using Promo code Dragon at checkout. That's a U R A frames.com promo code Dragon this exclusive Black Friday Cyber Monday deal is their best of the year, so order now before it ends and support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. Thanks or Frames this episode of Tales.

[Gus Sorola]

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[Chris Demaris]

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[Blaine Gibson]

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[Gus Sorola]

So, yeah, you see what appears to be a middle aged human wearing a black suit and a top hat with a red bow tie and a cape and white gloves.

[Micah Risinger]

Very classic.

[John Risinger]

Ma'.

[Gus Sorola]

Am.

[John Risinger]

Hello, I'm Natty. Whatcha up to?

[I]

Oh, hello, Natty. I'm looking for my rabbit.

[John Risinger]

I can't help but notice you have a particular attire about you. Are you perhaps a traveling entertainer of some sort?

[I]

Why, of course. I'm a magician.

[Gus Sorola]

She does like jazz hands.

[John Risinger]

Whoa. Okay. What happened with your rabbit?

[I]

Looks like someone let the rabbit out of the hat.

[John Risinger]

You don't seem quite bothered by the fact that you're about to lose your actual.

[I]

Oh, you know, rabbits are a dime a dozen. I can always find another.

[Chris Demaris]

Did Gunther try and catch the rabbit? Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

What do you do? You try to chase after it.

[Chris Demaris]

I'll chase after it and then grab it with my tongue.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, just don't hurt it.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, don't hurt that rabbit. If you hurt that rabbit, I'll fight. I'll fight you.

[John Risinger]

Oh, God.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, why don't you, you make a, however you like, make an attack with your tongue or whatever you do to grab it.

[Chris Demaris]

Well, to grab is like a strength, a thing, opposition. But I don't know as far as like the move. If it's like a dexterity thing. I don't have a, like an attack roll for my tongue.

[Gus Sorola]

I thought you had like a specific thing for it, didn't you?

[Chris Demaris]

No, it doesn't do damage. It should just grab things.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, okay, then just do like a, an arm strike. In that case.

[Chris Demaris]

Seven team.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, I'm going to make an opposed roll here for the rabbit. See if it gets away with the.

[Chris Demaris]

Tongue to grab it.

[John Risinger]

It's.

[Chris Demaris]

It's an opposed. A Dex grapple.

[Blaine Gibson]

Check the stinky dragon. Fun fact of the day. Did you know that Chris's favorite Pokemon is a Lickitung?

[John Risinger]

Yep.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It's a good one.

[Gus Sorola]

Is that true?

[Blaine Gibson]

It is, yeah.

[Micah Risinger]

Do you know what mine is?

[Gus Sorola]

Hold on.

[John Risinger]

Jigglypuff.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Snorlax.

[Gus Sorola]

O. Also good one, good one, good one.

[Chris Demaris]

So I guess that would actually be a plus three if it's a dexterity, so that'd be a 20.

[Gus Sorola]

It doesn't matter. I rolled a seven, so you're still good regardless.

[Chris Demaris]

So I guess while Natty's talking to this magician, Gunther just goes. He just snatches the rabbit in his mouth.

[I]

Oh, why, thank you. Most people don't want to touch the rabbit.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's got a rare skin disease.

[John Risinger]

It has leprosy.

[I]

Oh, no, it's way worse than that.

[John Risinger]

What's wrong with the rabbit?

[I]

Well, it's rabbit, of course.

[John Risinger]

Perfect.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, rabid rabbit. I get it. Yes.

[Chris Demaris]

And got there, like.

[Gus Sorola]

Well, I. Gunther's not a mammal, so I like. Only mammals get rabies. Right. So you don't have to roll a check for that.

[John Risinger]

I didn't know that. Thanks for teaching me something.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, yeah, I learned.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah. It's about their blood temperature.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah.

[Chris Demaris]

That's why, like, animals are resistant to rabies if they have, like, warmer, colder blood temperatures. Like possums.

[Blaine Gibson]

Hey, Ben, as producer of the show, can you put us under educational on podcast now?

[Gus Sorola]

Welcome to this episode of Rabbit Facts. Not to be confused with Rabbit Facts.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It's our competing podcast.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh. The magician takes off their hat and grabs the rabbit and sticks it back into the hat.

[Chris Demaris]

I do not know if you should be taking that to children's shows.

[I]

Oh, it is what it is.

[Chris Demaris]

We might need to Old Yeller this rabbit.

[John Risinger]

Oh.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, no.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's violent. I do not like.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh.

[I]

You know, there's been fewer gigs since the war started, so I've got to do what I've got to do to book the events, and this rabbit is a part of it.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Did you get lost from where you were going? I mean, are you out here all by yourself? We're just trying to chase this rabbit.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

We have some openings for NPCs if you want to join.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

No, not offering that. I'm just curious.

[Gus Sorola]

The magician does, like, a very exaggerated, you know, pulls its. Its hands up to its eyes and look. Looks off in the one direction in the distance and turns around 180 degrees and looks off in the other direction in the distance and goes.

[I]

Oh, I guess I lost track of Where I was when I was chasing my rabbit. Oh, well.

[Gus Sorola]

And with that, the magician turns around and begins walking off in not even the direction it came from, just a totally different direction.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Godspeed, weirdo. Anyways, that was weird.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, I can't wait to fight her at the end of this campaign.

[Gus Sorola]

Y' all just letting furnace walk away. And you gave her back her. Her most powerful weapon, the rabid rabbit.

[John Risinger]

Isn't that like an old folk tale of, like, a traveling wizard on the road that people meet and granting them wishes? Something like that wizard of Oz.

[Blaine Gibson]

Do we get any wishes?

[Gus Sorola]

The magician does not turn around.

[John Risinger]

I think it's like a monkey's paw thing.

[Blaine Gibson]

I felt more Mad Hatter than anything.

[John Risinger]

That's just Gus's portrayal. Oh, you're right. You're right. I'm sure whoever we do with the VO will do a much better job.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, who's your inspiration? Die.

[John Risinger]

So you can be deprecating, but I can't be deprecating on you.

[Gus Sorola]

When you do it to someone else, it's insulting. When you do it to yourself, it's deprecating. As. As the. The magician walks away, she raises her hat up, and you hear in a.

[I]

Loud, booming voice, oh, and don't forget to tell everyone you've met the great Zephyr Blake.

[Micah Risinger]

Zephyr Blake.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. Well, that was weird.

[John Risinger]

I think that was actually par for the course with our adventures. We've been meeting some weird characters all this time.

[Gus Sorola]

Fair.

[John Risinger]

In fact, was there a magician who was the bartender? They just talk like one.

[Gus Sorola]

They just talk like one.

[Chris Demaris]

Okay, well, we have lost many, many minutes with this rabbit thing. We shall continue, Eh?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, I think you still have a little bit of fur on your tongue there. There you go.

[Chris Demaris]

Thank you, Doug.

[Blaine Gibson]

You know, you would look good with a beard.

[Chris Demaris]

Really?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Me?

[Blaine Gibson]

I mean, you already have when you are. You're practically one giant walking beard. But I'm saying.

[Chris Demaris]

Gunther, you know, could I try one?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, let me. Let me fashion you one real quick.

[John Risinger]

Just swap toes.

[Micah Risinger]

Doug shaves off a little bit of his fur and puts it on.

[John Risinger]

Gunther.

[Gus Sorola]

What do you think? Gunther?

[Chris Demaris]

How do I look? It is scratchy.

[Blaine Gibson]

Very cool.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah. Why don't you keep that?

[Chris Demaris]

Okay, I shall.

[Gus Sorola]

It's a shame we're sold out of 12 beards. On store.stinkydragonpod.com you could buy one there.

[Blaine Gibson]

We're hoping to restock those soon. Q1. Q1.

[Micah Risinger]

There you go.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay, so the magician has walked off. What do you want to do, team leader? Gunther, we shall continue.

[Chris Demaris]

Not Go down any rabbit holes.

[Gus Sorola]

Very nice. After walking for several hours, you eventually start to come up on boiling bluffs. As you are walking to the outskirts of the area, you see a creature start running in your direction, very panicked. Gunther, what do you do?

[Chris Demaris]

What kind of creature is it?

[Gus Sorola]

It looks like it's a balding gnome with singed ginger hair.

[Chris Demaris]

Are you friend or foe?

[Eddie Rivas]

You gotta tell me.

[Chris Demaris]

Help with what?

[Eddie Rivas]

Have you seen any metal creatures?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, no.

[Eddie Rivas]

They've stolen a relic from the font. Okay, bye.

[Gus Sorola]

And then the gnome runs off back into town.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, I had so many questions for him. Oh.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Of stolen relic from the font.

[Blaine Gibson]

These could be my brothers and sisters. But I think it's very clear I should probably stay low key, not reveal myself here.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, we won't out you.

[Gus Sorola]

So you know in boiling bluffs that there have been tale of metallic monsters recently seen hiding near the riverbank.

[Blaine Gibson]

In regards to the font, was it like a Helvetica? A Comic sans? A times new Roman. Like what?

[Gus Sorola]

All right, so boiling bluffs, you know, they're blackened bluffs that dribble with crude oil. The river bubbles with boiling oil. And there's brick and mortar buildings and oil lamps and torches that are lit throughout.

[Chris Demaris]

Is there something to do with the fire eater here? Right, and the fire eater's got a thing with the sea drinker, right?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, correct. And here in the boiling bluffs, there are a few landmarks that may be of interest to you. Okay, there's the crude corral tavern, the font of the fire eater, which is the temple, and Sora sump, which is a mine.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

What of the fire eater?

[Gus Sorola]

The font of the fire eater. Helvetica of the fire eater, as Blaine would say.

[Blaine Gibson]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Chris Demaris]

I say we shall go to the font of the fire eater to inquire within. What do ye say?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I mean, also, they said a relic was stolen from the font, so assuming they just got one font here, that's probably where it was stolen from.

[Chris Demaris]

That's a very good point, Doug.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Thank you.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, and we should keep out for those dang darned metal people. Watch out for those guys. Am I right, guys?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Are you metal, or are you technically made out of something a little more advanced?

[Blaine Gibson]

Now look at the brick and mortar to the architecture of these buildings. Look at these things.

[Chris Demaris]

Wow. Wow.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm not metal and I have a beard.

[Gus Sorola]

All right, so what's the move here, team leader?

[Chris Demaris]

I guess move towards the font lowercase, okay. Which means sneakily.

[Gus Sorola]

Gotcha.

[Chris Demaris]

Like trying to avoid this.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I think there's A lot of chaos going on right now, so I don't know if anyone's really going to pay attention to us, to be honest.

[Chris Demaris]

Is everyone running around, or was it just that one dude?

[Gus Sorola]

You know, as you're walking around, you don't notice anybody else running around. Panic. It seems like it was just that one person who seems to be running around, panicked.

[John Risinger]

Hmm.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Maybe he's having heat stroke or something.

[Chris Demaris]

Maybe he got bit by that rabbit.

[Blaine Gibson]

Gus, can I do something?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

Can I take a look at my shield? Is it glowing?

[Gus Sorola]

No, for the listeners. Remind them. Why would your shield glow?

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, no, it's okay, Gus, that.

[Gus Sorola]

You forgot.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'll remind you. So, basically, anytime I'm near a thaumatech, it's supposed to glow. The runes on it.

[Gus Sorola]

You know, it's bright outside, so it's hard to tell. And you know, as you're looking at it, you think maybe it is. You kind of do that thing where you. You. You cup your hands around your eyes to try to make a little dark area and look and. Yeah, it seems like it's ever so faintly glowing.

[Blaine Gibson]

Interesting.

[Chris Demaris]

Maybe we could take it into a dark room.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, never mind.

[Chris Demaris]

That's a terrible idea.

[Gus Sorola]

All right. You get an inspiration to die, Gunther?

[Chris Demaris]

I already have one, but I'll take it.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay, so you're heading over to the font. Is that correct? Gunther, did I hear you right?

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

You see a towering column of smoke and the temple carved into the cliff face. There seems to be a river running through the cliffs, and it smells. Has the aroma of like, barbecue.

[Chris Demaris]

So the river running into it, is it normal river or is it black river?

[Gus Sorola]

What?

[Chris Demaris]

You said there was like, oily river, right?

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, oh, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a oily river.

[Chris Demaris]

So the oily river is running into the font, and is it coming out any different?

[Gus Sorola]

No. Well, the river's running through the cliffs, and the temple is carved in the cliff face. Okay, Sorry. When you said, is the river black? I was like, what's he talking about? Okay. Yes.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yes.

[Chris Demaris]

All right. Well, I guess we just go up to it. Knock, knock. Easy. Fire eater.

[Gus Sorola]

Home. Okay. You walk up to the temple, Gunther leading the way. Knocking. As you're doing that, that same person you. That you met at the outskirts of town, that same balding gnome comes running up to you, Gunther, hand out. And begins shaking your hand very enthusiastically.

[Eddie Rivas]

Oh, no. The. The fire, it is not here right now, but does show up quite regularly. Hi, I'm Flack.

[Chris Demaris]

Who are you, Flack? I am Munther.

[Eddie Rivas]

Muntha. Pleasure to meet you, Munther.

[Chris Demaris]

I look back and wink at the guys because I'm in disguise.

[Blaine Gibson]

And then I look back at Maddie and Doug and shrug.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Flack, we. We overheard you saying that a relic was stolen from the font. I assume this is the same font you were referring to here.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yes.

[Gus Sorola]

It seems like the. The gnomes. Always out of breath.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah. Yes, it is. Yes. Let me show you around.

[Gus Sorola]

And there the gnome begins pointing around.

[Eddie Rivas]

You see, we have a natural font of oil. Always burning, very comfy. We've got beds with woolen blankets for priests and visiting travelers. We've got a steam room for prayer and meditation. And a hearthstone slab for cooking hot meals. And a reliquary, relics for divine manifestation. I'm the fire master here, Flack. And I help out the Kindlekin priests.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Wow. Okay, Flack, I want you to do me one favor before we continue on this little tour you've given us. All right? This is something I call box breathing. You go in for five, hold for five, out for five. Here we go. Okay. How you feeling now, buddy?

[Gus Sorola]

Tired.

[Blaine Gibson]

Flack, maybe you need some sort of peaceful, calming aura, like a white noise machine.

[Eddie Rivas]

Ah, that would be nice.

[Blaine Gibson]

Barbara, why are you taking your headphones off? Barbara, what's the matter?

[Gus Sorola]

Don't worry.

[Micah Risinger]

I'll still be able to hear you if you do.

[Blaine Gibson]

I was just offering. I didn't.

[John Risinger]

You know.

[Blaine Gibson]

He didn't say yes.

[Eddie Rivas]

Oh, yes.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

Okay.

[Chris Demaris]

I hope it's lowered a little, just for the listeners.

[Blaine Gibson]

I hope you up the gain, Micah. Make it into a music track. You can beatbox with it.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Well, what was the relic exactly that was stolen? And do you have any idea who might have taken it?

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah, it was the fire opal of fireballs. You've probably heard of it. Metal creatures were seen wandering around the temple, but they managed to escape without anybody noticing.

[Blaine Gibson]

And these metal creatures, are they, like, humanoid? Were they walking on, you know, two feet, or were they, like, spiders? Like, what do they look like?

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah, yeah, they were humanoid.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay. Were there any identifying qualities of these metal creatures?

[Eddie Rivas]

They're metallic.

[Blaine Gibson]

Metallic, Great.

[Chris Demaris]

That makes sense.

[Blaine Gibson]

Did they refer to each other by any name? Do they communicate in any sort of way?

[Eddie Rivas]

They were made of some kind of blue, gray metal.

[John Risinger]

Ooh.

[Chris Demaris]

Do you know why they want the fire opal? Fireballs?

[Eddie Rivas]

Well, it's very important and very powerful. I don't know what they want specifically, but they're probably envious.

[Blaine Gibson]

Were they violent in any way? Did they, like, you know, were there Any casualties or anything like that in the village?

[Eddie Rivas]

Ah, no, they. They went in and out undetected.

[Blaine Gibson]

Interesting.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

And what does the fire opal of fireballs do exactly?

[Blaine Gibson]

I have a few guesses.

[Eddie Rivas]

It's a blazing, fiery red, translucent gemstone, about the size of a grapefruit, and it's constantly steaming.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Wow.

[Eddie Rivas]

According to legend, this is just between us. Of course. It's just a single teardrop shed from the fire eater.

[Gus Sorola]

Wow.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

That's a pretty powerful single teardrop.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Why would somebody want to take it?

[Eddie Rivas]

It's very valuable. Maybe that's the reason.

[Chris Demaris]

What purpose does it have here?

[Eddie Rivas]

Well, this is the font of the fire eater, and it's a relic of the fire eater, so it just makes sense to have it here.

[Chris Demaris]

Oh, you don't do any prep, you'll have no practical use for it on a day to day basis.

[Eddie Rivas]

Prayer, meditation.

[John Risinger]

It's like going to a Catholic church. Like, why you got all these bones around here of these saints? Do you do something with them?

[Gus Sorola]

What's the point of that altar and that cross over there?

[Chris Demaris]

No, I understand. When things are stolen from your village, it can be very, very upsetting.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah, so upset.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's like a sacred labubu.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I have here with me the only solid gold. Labo.

[Chris Demaris]

Shall we go look upon the river banks?

[J]

What is that?

[Blaine Gibson]

Upon the river? Come on, come on.

[Chris Demaris]

Barb.

[John Risinger]

No.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Just let them fly around the river.

[Chris Demaris]

Should we do that?

[Gus Sorola]

Flak?

[Blaine Gibson]

Can you point us in the direction of where the metal people were?

[Eddie Rivas]

Well, if I knew that, I'd be there, you know, getting the opal back.

[John Risinger]

How about. How about we do this, Flack? I feel like we could be helpful for each other. Help to each other even. What if me and my compatriots, we offer to help retrieve the. The opal for your temple, and in return, you do your darndest to help us get in contact with the fire eater.

[Eddie Rivas]

Oh, oh, yeah, absolutely. I can do that.

[John Risinger]

A little bit of that. Quid pro quo.

[Eddie Rivas]

Yeah, this for that. I get it.

[John Risinger]

Perfect. You know Latin.

[Eddie Rivas]

Okie dokie.

[Blaine Gibson]

Smart little gnome.

[John Risinger]

Makes sense. You're in a church. You know Latin. All right, let's go find them metal.

[Chris Demaris]

Ribbons we look for. Like tracks.

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah, you can do that just around the riverbed.

[Blaine Gibson]

I don't need to do this. I don't know if this is an abuse of the power, but I could also, like, Tolve has a cape, right? And he has the shield that glows when it's near Thaumatex. I'm assuming these are Thaumatex so I could throw the cape over me in darkness. Cover your eyes, Gunther. Well, not too long because that's also dark and that you, you know, don't blame Gunther. Just stare over there into the sun. Don't look into the sun. I'm blinded. Figured out. Okay, so anyways, if you guys guided me and we kind of walked around the village and then the stronger the light grew from the shield, that kind of points us in the direction maybe when.

[Chris Demaris]

What about this? Also just to get us started, I'll use my octopod of obscura and pour it out looking for that fireball.

[Blaine Gibson]

Big old fireball, man.

[Chris Demaris]

Big old fireball.

[Gus Sorola]

That was.

[Chris Demaris]

Can I do that?

[Blaine Gibson]

Cus.

[Gus Sorola]

So, yeah. Turns water into inquisitive ink. Dribble some out. Ink flows towards hidden things in the area. Use 4d6 dice pool per long rest. Barbara.

[Blaine Gibson]

If the fire eater is pitbull, I'm.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Going to scream fireball.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, go ahead. And you can dribble some out. And you roll from your dice pool, Gunther.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Five, two, five, six. So I guess I lose one, but I have three remaining.

[Gus Sorola]

Correct. So you dribble some out. And you know, like, at first it doesn't seem like it's doing anything. It just kind of stays in a puddle. And then it slowly begins dribbling and running off to one side, seemingly leading you to one area here inside the font.

[Chris Demaris]

Wait, inside the font?

[Gus Sorola]

Yes.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

The call is coming from within the house.

[Gus Sorola]

So, you know, you know, when you first walked in, Flack kind of pointed out some different parts of the font to you. There's the font of burning oil. There's beds with woolen blankets, a steam room, a hot stone slab, the reliquary. And there's various priests and travelers, including Flack, who came up and, you know, greeted you. And as you're watching this liquid flow, it seems to be kind of leading out towards the steam room.

[Chris Demaris]

Steam room. That makes sense.

[John Risinger]

Sense.

[Chris Demaris]

Hey, are we getting good vibes from Flack? Like we got vibe check on him?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, make me an insight check.

[Blaine Gibson]

Good call, six.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

Doesn't seem like he's hiding anything to you?

[John Risinger]

All right.

[Chris Demaris]

I am, though. My real name is Gunther.

[Gus Sorola]

Don't tell him. It's a secret.

[Blaine Gibson]

What was the fake name he gave him?

[Chris Demaris]

Month.

[Blaine Gibson]

That's right.

[Chris Demaris]

And my mini sons.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Natty is a daughter.

[John Risinger]

Actually, I'm a mother.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, that's true. She's a blank. She's a mother. She's a daughter.

[John Risinger]

She's a blank.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You literally that word.

[John Risinger]

That tickled me. I don't know why.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

She's a female dog.

[Chris Demaris]

Before we begin search, we should take stock of your temple so we are familiar with it.

[Eddie Rivas]

Oh, absolutely.

[Gus Sorola]

And you know what, Chris? Since you rolled an insight check, I'm gonna give you something. I'm gonna reward the investigative effort here. Let's. Yes. And your terrible role.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yes, yes, yes.

[Gus Sorola]

You know, you rolled an insight check on Flack. It seems, based on you trying to read him, that he genuinely cares about serving the community. Seems like his concern is real and that he genuinely is concerned about what's going on here.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, that's a cool read.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah. Okay.

[Blaine Gibson]

I like Flack a little bit more now.

[Micah Risinger]

I just feel bad every time Gus has to voice Flack because I worry that Gus is gonna pass out.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, no, it's okay. I'm not totally, totally keeping it. Don't worry about it.

[Blaine Gibson]

Gus is stressing me out so bad.

[Gus Sorola]

I need some white noise because I'm so stressed.

[Chris Demaris]

So I guess could we head towards that boiling room?

[Ad Voice]

Steam room.

[Chris Demaris]

Steam room, yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

You bid adieu to Flack and begin walking, you know, following the liquid in the direction of the steam room. And, you know, as you approach it, you can see a river trickles past a hot bowl of coals that are causing steam in this room. And there's benches with wool towels and what seems to be a drain in the floor. And around the room, there's various kindlekin priests meditating and praying.

[John Risinger]

Natty casts disguise self and puts a towel around her and a big old towel around her wig so she looks like she's meant to be in here.

[Micah Risinger]

Or just got out of the shower.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then she sits down next to, like, those guys.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay. Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

Can I get a vibe for the guys in there? The Kindlekin priests?

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

Like, you want to make a vibe check or what are you trying to do here?

[Blaine Gibson]

I want to acknowledge that we are in a sauna, and they probably are in various states of unclothed. So I don't want to, like, stare, but I also want to. I feel like I could maybe recognize a sibling, if that's what they are, or a thaumatek.

[Gus Sorola]

So you're, like, looking at them, and then you put your cape over your head with your shield and, like, try.

[John Risinger]

To look at it and see in.

[Gus Sorola]

Here to see if it's. It's any brighter, like that kind of thing.

[Blaine Gibson]

Sure, sure.

[John Risinger]

Normal sauna behavior.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, that's me.

[Gus Sorola]

Well, these priests that are here, they're not exactly, you Know, in sauna attire. Seems like they're meditating and praying, like they're deep in thought. They don't seem like they have much regard for you. You kind of, you know, check your shield to see if it glows any brighter. And it does seem like it's glowing a little brighter, but it's not, like, super bright and blinding or anything.

[John Risinger]

Okay.

[Blaine Gibson]

I give, like, a. Like, a cutting of the neck thing to the rest of the team. Like, this. This isn't them.

[Gus Sorola]

Kill them.

[Chris Demaris]

Gunther draws his sword.

[Micah Risinger]

I mean, I know Natty was in the midst of disguising self to do something, so I don't want to, like, all of a sudden just completely leave that.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. In order to assist that. Let me give a little bit of flavor text. These priests seem like they're wearing outfits made of black wool, and they're wearing steaming ceramic shoes.

[John Risinger]

Their shoes are steaming?

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

Like, as in their shoes are hot, probably.

[Blaine Gibson]

How bad does it smell in there?

[Chris Demaris]

Just their shoes are not. Not the ground.

[John Risinger]

Maybe it's like a flatulation. Or not. Not flagellation. Flat. What's the word I'm looking for, Gus?

[Gus Sorola]

Flagellation.

[John Risinger]

Flagellation.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's so close.

[John Risinger]

Why are those two.

[Gus Sorola]

It's really close. So there is a hot bowl of coal steaming in here as well, Chris, to answer your question, Nettie, do you want to do something to disguise here?

[John Risinger]

Yeah. So there. You described them as, like, meditating or praying. Are they, like, sitting? Are they kneeling? Is this, like, what. What's. What's the prayer situation?

[Gus Sorola]

Two of them are kneeling, and one of them is sitting, and they all appear to have their eyes closed.

[John Risinger]

Okay, I'm gonna sit awkwardly close next to the guy who's sitting. Okay, Can I just sit there and listen for a second? Do I hear anything?

[Blaine Gibson]

So flatuation.

[Gus Sorola]

This is flat flatulence.

[Micah Risinger]

That's the steam. It's actually farts.

[Gus Sorola]

Yuck. I mean, you don't hear anything. This person just seems to have their eyes closed. Okay, since you sit down, like, right next to them, this priest opens their eyes and kind of, like, turns and looks at you and then closes their eyes and bows their head once again.

[John Risinger]

Hey, I'm new here. What are we doing in here? I was on a tour of the temple, and I wanted to come in here, and it seemed like you guys were having a good time.

[J]

I am attempting to reconnect with the fire eater.

[John Risinger]

Oh, reconnect. Like, you've connected with them before?

[J]

Well, the fire eater has not been seen in some time. Normally, she manifests Herself here quite regularly, but it has been a while.

[John Risinger]

Was her disappearance in correlation with, like, the loss of the opal, or was this happening before the opal went bye bye?

[J]

It's been happening since before the opal was lost.

[John Risinger]

Oh, okay.

[J]

We worry she might be offended.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Offended?

[John Risinger]

What happened?

[J]

We do not know. We are trying to figure it out through meditation and through prayer.

[John Risinger]

You're just one of those people who think it's your fault.

[J]

It most likely is. So we're hoping through meditation and prayer, we can discover the source of offense.

[John Risinger]

Oh, okay. Is there something we're supposed to do in this room specifically to try to connect with the fire eater?

[J]

Do you wish to join us and become Kindlekin?

[John Risinger]

Absolutely.

[Gus Sorola]

I love the ascent.

[J]

Excellent. You can join us by performing our initiation rituals.

[Gus Sorola]

You can walk on hot coals, earn your belongings, or experience the tongue of tongues. Oh, all three. Oh, not or. It's. And let me retake that.

[John Risinger]

Oh, heck, yeah. That suddenly got much worse.

[J]

You can join us by performing our initiation ritual, walking on hot coals, burning your belongings, and experiencing the tongs of tongues.

[John Risinger]

Okay. Yeah, yeah. You know what? When in Rome do fiery stuff.

[J]

Most excellent.

[John Risinger]

I got this.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm so. I'm very interested in the tongue of tongues.

[Eddie Rivas]

I'm very, like.

[Blaine Gibson]

I cannot tell you what that could possibly be.

[John Risinger]

Let's find out.

[Blaine Gibson]

Thrilled.

[John Risinger]

Let's find out.

[Micah Risinger]

Are the three of us just kind of like in the dory watching this happen?

[Gus Sorola]

That's up to you. What are you all doing?

[Micah Risinger]

I would be obvious if I tried to come and join, so I think I would just be trying to stealthily watch.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah, I'm watching from the corner and kind of listening in.

[Chris Demaris]

Doing that thing where you're, like, pretending to look at something up on the wall.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, wow.

[Chris Demaris]

And Gunther strokes his beard.

[John Risinger]

Neddy turns around and sees that Douglas has much more volume than usual in his hair.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Humidity in here. My hair starting to turn curly.

[John Risinger]

Oh, he'd be so cute.

[Blaine Gibson]

You got a perm?

[Gus Sorola]

A.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It's my natural curls.

[John Risinger]

That's how it works for me too, Doug.

[Gus Sorola]

Me too.

[J]

Excellent. Which of the three rituals would you like to start with?

[John Risinger]

Let's go in order. You said him in that word for reason. I figure that's the clear sign of. Clear way to get to that fire eater's presence.

[J]

Oh, I appreciate the enthusiasm.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[J]

So first, walking on hot coals, you must wear shoes filled with hot coals for a day.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Ow.

[Gus Sorola]

Ow.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, that sounds smart.

[J]

It's the first step to proving your devotion to the fire eater.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, emphasis on step.

[Chris Demaris]

I see, I see, I see.

[John Risinger]

Okay. I'm just looking at my character sheet to see if there's anything I can do to mitigate this.

[Blaine Gibson]

I was gonna say, as a drow, are you fire resistant? No, there ain't nothing.

[John Risinger]

So we're doing this full go. All right, give me them coals.

[J]

Excellent.

[Gus Sorola]

You know, luckily for you, there's a bowl of steaming coals in this room. So, you know, you can grab some with the tongs that are in the bowl and use them.

[Blaine Gibson]

I just have a quick question. Do the shoes come into a 4 inch heel? I'm just asking for Natty.

[J]

You can provide your own shoes or use what is here.

[Micah Risinger]

Is there also a way I could very, very stealthily come in and just graze Natty and give her guidance?

[John Risinger]

Yeah, do that.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Eddie Rivas]

It's just Doug awkwardly walking through the.

[John Risinger]

Steam room, just gently touching Natty and walking back.

[Blaine Gibson]

Listen, as someone who has gone to saunas before, there is nothing worse than being accidentally touched in a sauna and.

[Micah Risinger]

You can't see anything.

[John Risinger]

Really? That's why I wanted to sit awkwardly close to this guy, because there is a unwritten rule that you don't do that.

[Blaine Gibson]

No.

[John Risinger]

Also just discovery as I'm looking through my character sheet. Don't worry, Barbara. Animate dead specifically is you use it without using a spell slot because it's part of my eldritch invocations.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Wow, Cool.

[Blaine Gibson]

It's like a cantrip, then.

[John Risinger]

It is a spell that I can cast once. Every long rest.

[Micah Risinger]

Oh, okay.

[John Risinger]

Nice.

[Micah Risinger]

Every long rest you could reanimate.

[John Risinger]

And so we. We long rested and I brought Mr. Captain grumbles along with us. So don't worry about that. I can still. I can keep Captain Grumbles around forever. All right.

[Blaine Gibson]

Forever and ever. Eat that, Gus.

[Gus Sorola]

I've got plans for Captain Grumbles.

[Chris Demaris]

Do it.

[John Risinger]

Do it. All right. Coles grabbed him with the tongs. Put him in my shoes and feel how that feels.

[J]

We are very appreciative. Native of the devotion.

[Gus Sorola]

I'm hesitant to read the metagame thing. I'm going to hold off until it's relevant.

[John Risinger]

Great. That's not ominous at all, Gus.

[Micah Risinger]

I was able to cast guidance, though.

[Gus Sorola]

Yes, absolutely. I figure you do that thing where you kind of walk in, do a circle around the room, you know, walk kind of close to Natty, do the quick brush, and then just walk back out to the door wherever you want.

[Micah Risinger]

Just so you know, Natty, that you can add a D4 to any number rolled on one ability check of your choice.

[John Risinger]

Thank you. I'm quite familiar with it.

[Gus Sorola]

That's true.

[Micah Risinger]

You did have guys.

[John Risinger]

It's good to teach our listeners who aren't familiar.

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah, Steve.

[Gus Sorola]

Steve in Illinois we see you.

[John Risinger]

I think the last time we did that someone did get into our like Discord or something and was like, that was me.

[Gus Sorola]

Discord. [e-mail] Foreign. This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon is brought to you by Audible and Harry Potter the Full cast Audio editions Experience the beloved Harry Potter stories like you've never heard them before on Audible. Get ready to be transported to the world of Harry Potter in a captivating production that features hundreds of unique voices and immersive sound design that brings the wizarding world vividly to life in Dolby Atmos. Also featuring an electrifying new musical score, Harry Potter the Full cast audio editions present J.K. rowling's iconic series as a truly spellbinding listening event for the whole family. The full cast Audio editions features a spectacular A list cast, including Hugh Laurie as albus Dumbledore, Matthew McFaddy and as Voldemort, Riz Ahmed as Severus Snape, Michelle Gomez as Professor McGonagall, Mark Addy and more. The production also features a rousing new musical score that heightens every magical moment. The adventure will surround you. You'll hear footsteps echoing off the walls of Hogwarts and the whoosh of a golden snitch as it darts past your ear. It's a spellbinding experience for longtime Harry Potter fans and a delightful new way to introduce stories to a new generation. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone is available now, with new audiobooks in the series releasing every month thereafter. It's Harry Potter like you've never heard it before. Listen on audible go to audible.com HP1 that's HP and the number one and start listening today. Again, that's audible.com HP1 listen on Audible Listen Now. You may have heard of HelloFresh. They're the number one meal kit in America, making home cooking easier with chef crafted recipes and fresh ingredients delivered straight to your door. But this fall, they're serving up even more to love. This isn't the HelloFresh you remember. It's bigger. HelloFresh has doubled its menu. Now you can choose from 100 options each week, including seasonal recipes and dishes from around the world. Dig into bigger ports, portions that'll keep everyone satisfied. It's also healthier. Feel great with an even healthier menu choose from more than 15 high protein recipes each week with options like grass fed ribeye or lamb chops. HelloFresh also helps you eat greener with new veggie packed recipes that have two or more veggies per dish. And also it's tastier. Get steak and seafood recipes delivered each week for no extra cost. Now with three times the seafood option. Savor the season with hearty fall recipes like classic Beef Chili or Honey Glazed Pork Tenderloin. Discover new seasonal produce each week from leeks to broccolini to Italian eggplant and more. I've been using and depending on HelloFresh for quite a while now and I think that it's a fantastic service and one of my favorite things is how it's like a project. I think I've said that that's my like my favorite thing about it is it's like step by step instruction. I'm a dummy when it comes to cooking and it breaks it all down. Shows you exactly what you need to be doing and then when you're done you get to eat it. Plus everything tastes so good. All the recipes are so great. Absolutely love it. The best way to cook just got better. Go to hellofresh.com stinky dragon10fm now to get 10 free meals plus a free breakfast for life. One per box with active subscription free meals applied as a discount on first box. New subscribers only. Varies by plan. That's hellofresh.com Stinky Dragon 10 FM to get 10 free meals get it plus free breakfast for life.

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[J]

Do you remember the next step?

[John Risinger]

Yeah. Burn stuff.

[Gus Sorola]

Make a constitution check.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, why not? Thirteen.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

You feel the coals in your. In your shoes, like burning and singing.

[J]

You know, pain is just a warning signal sent from the brain. You are holding it together quite well.

[John Risinger]

To be clear, Blaine did bring up something that Natty walks around in high heeled boots all day long. So now he's got tough feet. Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

You're ready. Maybe Natty's got calluses that are helping to absorb the.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

Absorb the heat.

[Micah Risinger]

Good ankle strength.

[J]

Yeah, that is correct. Now you need to burn your belongings.

[Gus Sorola]

Make a constitution check.

[John Risinger]

15.

[Gus Sorola]

All right. Ooh, getting real hot.

[J]

We must set fire to some of your belongings chosen at random.

[Gus Sorola]

Go ahead and make another constitution check.

[Blaine Gibson]

What are you doing here? Please be geeky. Please be geeky.

[Gus Sorola]

Please be geeky.

[John Risinger]

18.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

All right.

[Gus Sorola]

All right. Yeah.

[Chris Demaris]

Little anything is Captain grumbles randomly.

[Gus Sorola]

So what you're going to do is you're going to roll 3D6 individually and using each number rolled, I'm going to start from the top of your inventory and count until reaching the item slot corresponding to that number. And we're going to burn that item.

[John Risinger]

Okay. You burn my auto harp. Natty will in fact bring this temple down around these people's faces.

[Gus Sorola]

You're rolling, so you're burning.

[John Risinger]

All right, first roll one.

[Gus Sorola]

That is your auto harp.

[Blaine Gibson]

No, no, wait.

[John Risinger]

What was the rule?

[Gus Sorola]

Roll 3D6 individually using each number rolled. Start from the top of the inventory and count until reaching the item slot corresponding to that number. Burn the item.

[John Risinger]

Wait, why am I rolling three times three items?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, you gotta burn belongings with a. With an S. Plural.

[John Risinger]

He did say plural. All right. Yes, that's fine. Deal with what happens with that six and six. So do I need to roll that third one again?

[Gus Sorola]

Well, what I'm gonna do is I'm gonna not count the items that are already burned, so that's okay.

[John Risinger]

What you burning?

[Gus Sorola]

That's a dagger. Okay. And your light leather armor.

[John Risinger]

I think I even have the armor on.

[Gus Sorola]

I don't think you do either. It's not clear. Perfect.

[John Risinger]

Gonna take it.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. So. Auto. Harp, Dagger, armor.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Rough.

[John Risinger]

What am I supposed to do now?

[Gus Sorola]

So it's not automatically burned. Natty, you must take these items and put them in the. In the fire to burn them.

[John Risinger]

You can.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

You can.

[John Risinger]

I can't.

[Micah Risinger]

You can't?

[John Risinger]

No.

[Micah Risinger]

You don't have any type of illusion.

[John Risinger]

You guys are crazy. You guys all think I have a million different spells. I'm just a warlock. That's fine. You know what? It's.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm.

[John Risinger]

Natty's. Natty is committed, okay? She's very straightforward. She doesn't lie. She likes to be straight on. So Natty does. She takes out a harp. She plays it one more time, a sad little melody, and then puts the dagger on it, wraps all of it in the leather armor. And where do I put this?

[J]

You can put it on the steaming coals. That should do the trick.

[Blaine Gibson]

Natty played Ring of Fire by Johnny Cash.

[Chris Demaris]

I was just thinking of. I was trying to think of a good song.

[John Risinger]

And you got it.

[Chris Demaris]

No.

[John Risinger]

Natty plays something that will not get us copywritten.

[Chris Demaris]

Strike.

[John Risinger]

Yeah. Natty puts it on the fire.

[Gus Sorola]

It slowly begins to smolder and then bursts into a small pile of flames.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Fireball.

[John Risinger]

This is a somber moment. Okay. Not anymore.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, man. Todd. You know, we used to work with Todd. He did great pit bullet crushing. Yeah, he was crazy good.

[J]

The last step is the tongs of tongues.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm so excited. Excited, Thrilled for this.

[Micah Risinger]

I want to see what this one is.

[John Risinger]

What's this one entail?

[J]

This one is simple. You merely split one's tongue into a three pronged fork using the tongs of tongues and a blade of your choosing. Do the deed. You will certainly bleed.

[Gus Sorola]

And now that you look, you see this? Kindlekin's tongue is split into a three pronged fork.

[John Risinger]

Okay. You sure you want to do this, Natty? Yeah. Natty goes and grabs. You said it's like a little blade.

[Gus Sorola]

Using the tongue of tongues and a blade of one's choosing. Oh, you can supply your own blade.

[John Risinger]

Well, you took one of my daggers.

[Gus Sorola]

You still have one.

[John Risinger]

I have another one.

[Micah Risinger]

I think the Ultramans just make you cooler, in my opinion.

[John Risinger]

Yeah. Yeah. Natty takes it. And Natty's tough as nails. She takes the tong, pulls out her tongue, and goes. Giggy, don't watch. Actually, Gigi, watch. This is important, this culture. I was going to say that doesn't.

[Blaine Gibson]

Seem like you f. Doesn't want.

[John Risinger]

Natty cuts her tongue into two spots. So she has a. The 3.3 fork tongue.

[Micah Risinger]

Now, Doug was accidentally watching.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, God.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Why did I watch that? Oh, my God. I'm Scottful life.

[Gus Sorola]

I feel like Doug would start vomiting.

[Blaine Gibson]

Well, Doug and Tolv are also really, like, violent.

[Gus Sorola]

Is.

[Blaine Gibson]

That's kind of violent.

[Gus Sorola]

You take five points of slashing damage.

[John Risinger]

That's it. That's not bad. It's just a tongue.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It's just a tongue.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. You must talk with a numb tongue for the rest of the session.

[John Risinger]

That's not gonna be good for audio listening. Only when I'm in Natty's voice, right?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, of course.

[John Risinger]

Okay. Natty turns to Gigi, and knowing that Giggy has a demonic fork tongue.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, yeah.

[John Risinger]

Mama lock in that, look up. And Gigi also goes back and he goes.

[Chris Demaris]

Just blood dripping down.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Eddie Rivas]

Giggy likes blood.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

It's a horrifying image. That will not be our thumbnail for this episode.

[Blaine Gibson]

You ever, like, went to church with.

[John Risinger]

A friend and then they start doing.

[Blaine Gibson]

Things and you're like, what did I get myself into? You know, like, this feels like that moment.

[Micah Risinger]

I have not.

[John Risinger]

I think this is more occult stuff than church stuff, if I'm being honest. Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

The Kindlekin priest puts their arm around you very heartily. Natty.

[J]

Oh, welcome, sister. You're one of us now.

[John Risinger]

Great. I've forgotten why I committed to this.

[Blaine Gibson]

You don't sound right, Natty.

[Gus Sorola]

Yep. That's not the right voice.

[John Risinger]

Thank you so much. I appreciate that. I have a question.

[J]

Yes.

[John Risinger]

Shut up, Tov.

[Gus Sorola]

Sorry.

[John Risinger]

So I didn't even get your name. What's your name?

[J]

My name is Faunus. Apollos Faunus.

[John Risinger]

Every time. Every time.

[Blaine Gibson]

I love the. You're immersing yourself in the character, and I love it.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Fanis Follus Fan Faus.

[John Risinger]

You said that these two other guys in here that do you guys are all trying to return to fire you. That mean you know them?

[J]

Do I know the people in here with me?

[John Risinger]

Yes.

[J]

We're work acquaintances. We're not best friends or anything, but we work together.

[John Risinger]

That's how Gus describes all of us. But, like, you've seen him around before. They're not any, like, stranger.

[J]

Oh, yes, absolutely.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Okay.

[John Risinger]

Cause between you and me, we're looking for the metal folk who came in here and took the opal.

[J]

Oh, yes. We need to find them. But now that you're Kindlekin, you have access to help from us.

[Blaine Gibson]

Ooh, rewards program.

[John Risinger]

Something's gonna come from this.

[J]

Yes.

[John Risinger]

Okay, good.

[J]

We love your enthusiasm. You jumped right in without knowing what you get.

[John Risinger]

That's that's natty. What'd I get? Is it a replacement?

[Blaine Gibson]

Autoheart. Frequent friar miles.

[J]

You get the boon of tamed flame. A spark of fire is always but a prayer away. Granted, the fire eater isn't preoccupied.

[Blaine Gibson]

Any relation, Doug?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

A boon of tame flame. I imagine it's similar, but I don't know if there's an E at the end of that boon.

[Gus Sorola]

No, there is not.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, no relation.

[J]

Then you have the benefit of hot stuff. Need a woolen blanket, hot meal, scented candle, a light source. You can visit the font and find a fellow Kindlekin, or send a raven and receive one of these items once per day.

[John Risinger]

Whoa. Okay.

[J]

And on top of that, the best benefit of all. Fiery friends. We are forever part of a fiery fellowship that burns with compassion.

[John Risinger]

Is there more involved with that? Is that just you saying we're buddies?

[J]

We're buddies.

[John Risinger]

Okay?

[J]

We're work acquaintances.

[John Risinger]

I like new fan.

[Micah Risinger]

I don't know if you want to ask, like, if there's something that you could, like, call upon them in time of need or something like that. Like, summon them?

[John Risinger]

Yeah. Is this, like, something where you guys will help me if I need help?

[J]

Yes. If you visit the fawn to the fire eater, you will always have help here.

[John Risinger]

All right?

[Blaine Gibson]

Can they cancel my student loan debts?

[Chris Demaris]

Can they help me catch that suffering sufferer?

[John Risinger]

Thank you so much for all this. I have one more question before I probably gotta leave and rejoin my compatriots over there, who probably just wondering what the heck's going on. Did you say anything about those metal guys who came in here and took the opal?

[J]

No, but there have been erratic attacks against miners by metal creatures. The miners suffered some lacerations. The creatures were last seen near the boiling river. Maybe that's a leaf.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, that's actually interesting. I heard that they were attacking miners. Were they just attacking to attack, or were they trying to steal something? Or was what was. Did anybody discern a motive? This is serious.

[J]

D and D. Yeah, yeah, we really have no idea. They just seem to come out of nowhere and begin attacking for no reason.

[John Risinger]

Okay, well, I. I won't take up any more of your time. You are very habitable for letting me in, interrupt your priors, and then making me part. Hey, hey. Fist bump.

[Gus Sorola]

You get a fist bump back.

[John Risinger]

There we go. There we go. And then Natty actually just goes in for a hug.

[Chris Demaris]

All right.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, you go in and get a very hearty hug from Faunus, and Natty.

[John Risinger]

Turns around and goes, who else wants to be one of These guys.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, you can take your. You can. Oh, wait. You have to continue wearing the shoes with hot coals for the rest of the day.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Okay, Nanny, you want me to hold your heels for you?

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah.

[John Risinger]

Oh, like, my boots?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Your boots? Oh, I imagine they're heeled boots.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yes, please. Thank you so much, Doug. That's so nice of you.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I got you. Wow. These are work. Of all these things?

[John Risinger]

Yeah, my mama made them.

[Blaine Gibson]

Rhinestone.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It was, like, embellished from, like, tip to bottom. That's crazy.

[John Risinger]

Don't waste any space.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Waste any thread.

[John Risinger]

Now, could someone else talk for the rest of this? Ricardi?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I think I vote Natty. Be the spokesperson for us for the rest of the episode.

[John Risinger]

Somehow not using your tongue makes my tongue really tired. I don't know why.

[Blaine Gibson]

You're, like, flexing it in the other way. You're avoiding use.

[John Risinger]

It's avoiding it having to hold still. It's like when you're in the car and you get tired from having to compensate to all the changes.

[Chris Demaris]

Well, this is the direction that the stone supposedly went, right?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. The liquid flowed into here, you know, over time, it continued flowing, came into the steam room, and then went down the drain.

[Blaine Gibson]

So do we know the source of the heat? You said there was, like, a hot.

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, there's a hot bowl of coals causing steam.

[Blaine Gibson]

Does there seem to be any sort of.

[John Risinger]

Like you said, the drain.

[Blaine Gibson]

Access to the drain? Yeah, like a. Like a. How big is the drain?

[Gus Sorola]

It's narrow. It's pretty small. I mean, do you go over and, like, poke around with it?

[John Risinger]

We got someone who can fit into small places.

[Gus Sorola]

It's true.

[Blaine Gibson]

Doug Boone.

[Micah Risinger]

I actually can.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Blaine Gibson]

Yeah. I think I was making a joke, but, yeah. That's like a power, right?

[Barbara Dunkelman]

I thought.

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah, it's a. I think it's a feature of a bugbear, maybe.

[John Risinger]

Bugbear trait.

[Micah Risinger]

Yes.

[Blaine Gibson]

I guess. I don't want to interrupt or upset the priests.

[Eddie Rivas]

We're buddies.

[John Risinger]

We're buddies now. These are my homes.

[Gus Sorola]

They're buddies. And they all have their eyes closed.

[John Risinger]

I don't know.

[Blaine Gibson]

I guess we could try to see if we could get into the drain.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, yeah.

[Micah Risinger]

Without squeezing, you could move through and stop in a space large enough for a small creature.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, what is that ability called?

[Micah Risinger]

It's called sneaky.

[Chris Demaris]

So me and Doug could both get in.

[Gus Sorola]

Well, you go over and, you know, you begin looking at the drain and to. Since you're the first one who brought it up, why don't you make me an investigation Check.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay, that is a zero. I'm going to use my inspiration deck. She whiz. I've had bad rules this game.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, this has been a bad roll.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, my God. Four and away. An inspo die.

[John Risinger]

I give an inspo die.

[Blaine Gibson]

All right. You won't regret it.

[Micah Risinger]

Here it comes. Here it is.

[Blaine Gibson]

13. Not bad.

[Gus Sorola]

There we go. Much better. You know, you bend over to kind of look at the drain, and as you're getting closer to it and looking, you realize the grate is loose. It's not fitting flush or like the way you would expect it to on there. Like it's been disturbed. And as you're bending over looking at it, like a reflection catches your eye and you see something shiny under one of the benches in this room.

[Blaine Gibson]

Okay, can I investigate that?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah, you head over and take a look. And under the bench is a small piece of some kind of bluish, grayish metal. It's in a small water puddle and it smells terrible.

[John Risinger]

Oh, no.

[Blaine Gibson]

Earlier that gnome flax said that the metal people were bluish gray.

[Micah Risinger]

Do you want to pick it up?

[Blaine Gibson]

I, I, I like, because the other people are meditating and I don't want to interrupt them. I want to, like, point out, like, I'll lift up the bluish gray metal, point this, and then I'll point down at the, the drain, too.

[Chris Demaris]

When he gets closer to the metal thing, does his shield glow more?

[Micah Risinger]

I imagine it's only if he's actually near a being.

[Gus Sorola]

That's what I think. That's how I interpret it as. Well, I'm going to say probably not.

[Micah Risinger]

Doug sees Tolve motioning and looks at the grate and then nudges Gunther and.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Goes, hey, Gunther, I think maybe something went into that grate. Maybe something that belonged to that piece of metal Tolvi's holding. That's what I'm gathering from his hand signals over there.

[Chris Demaris]

Yes, yes, I think that is very true. It's awfully dark in there. And it is so dark.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Well, why don't I help you out? Actually, let me just imbue a tiny item here with a light. If we go inside, I could light up the tunnel.

[Chris Demaris]

Oh, that would be most appreciated. Not that, I'm afraid.

[Blaine Gibson]

Gunther's Night lights, available at store.stinkydragonpod.com if.

[Micah Risinger]

We go up to the great Cui, we tell if this, like, tunnel is small enough for us to fit in.

[Gus Sorola]

This opening is super narrow. This drain is normally only big enough for small creatures to get into. So normally you would not be Able to fit in this. But Doug, you have that specific feature that lets you fit into where small creatures can fit. And Gunther is small, so you two can fit, but Natty and To would not be able to fit in there. Okay.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

What if I gave one of them.

[Micah Risinger]

My potion of gaseous form?

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh, interesting.

[Gus Sorola]

Pretty sure that would work.

[Micah Risinger]

Problem is, I only have one of them.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

When you drink this potion, you gain the effects of gaseous form spell for one hour or until you end the effect as a bonus action. And Gaseous form is you transform a willing creature along with everything it's wearing and carrying into a misty cloud for the duration. All in this form. The target's only method of movement is a flying speed of 10ft. The target can enter and occupy the space of another creature. The target can pass through small holes, narrow openings, and even mere cracks. Though it treats liquids as if they were solid surfaces. The target can't fall, remains hovering in the air. While in the form of misty cloud. The target can't talk or manipulate objects. And any objects it was carrying or holding can't be dropped, used, or otherwise interacted with. The target cannot attack or cast spells.

[Blaine Gibson]

I love that this could work out. And I would hate to split the party three to one. How about instead of one person for one hour, we do two people for 30 minutes?

[Micah Risinger]

Like they each take a half a sip.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm saying, you know, Gus, offer on the table.

[Gus Sorola]

I don't think that works. I think you have to imbue the entire thing for the effects. Otherwise it's like you just start burping and farting a lot.

[Chris Demaris]

Makes sense.

[Blaine Gibson]

I'm going to keep that in mind.

[Micah Risinger]

I can also hold on to it because I feel like it will come in handy in case we ever need someone to like, do a reconnaissance.

[John Risinger]

Yeah.

[Chris Demaris]

Pretty cool.

[Blaine Gibson]

It is really cool.

[John Risinger]

Now, how about this? Because you're worried that, like, if Natty doesn't have anything, Natty has to stay, right?

[Blaine Gibson]

Or to.

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah, yeah. One of you.

[John Risinger]

Yeah, one of. Why don't I send somebody in Natty's stead? Gigi can turn into a little like Centipede and crawl around and Gigi can be my avatar.

[Chris Demaris]

That is terrifying.

[John Risinger]

And then Natty hang out.

[Micah Risinger]

Would Giggy not already be small enough to fit in there?

[John Risinger]

He probably is. Yeah. Yeah, probably. Although he did get bigger, so I think he is bigger.

[Blaine Gibson]

The other alternative is you two go down there, we stay up here, you guys try to find us an entrance and do that.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Yeah, let's do that. Okay. Gunto. I'M gonna take out. Do you actually have any more pebbles on you?

[Chris Demaris]

Well, yes, of course I do. Here's one I was thinking of giving to you, actually.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh, wow.

[Gus Sorola]

Oh, perfect.

[Micah Risinger]

I am going to use magical tinkering to imbue this tiny little pebble with a five foot radius light.

[Blaine Gibson]

So it's Team Dunther or Team Gug Gug.

[John Risinger]

I think we land on Gug Gug.

[Gus Sorola]

Or in this case, mug, since we're using a fake name.

[Micah Risinger]

Or Gung.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah. All right, well then holding out the rock, which is kind of like Gunther's rock in this moment. Can he go in?

[Gus Sorola]

Yeah. So the rock is imbued with a magical light.

[Micah Risinger]

Yeah, it's a five foot radius light.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Gunther. Also, just in case it goes out, it doesn't last as long as I'm hoping. Just hold on to me as well, because, you know, I got darkvision, so if you get scared or anything, just Doug will protect you.

[Chris Demaris]

Okay, that's good to know. I have dark vision too, but it's still so dark. I cannot help.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

It's very dark.

[Gus Sorola]

I feel like Gunther or. I'm sorry, I feel like Munther would be so scared that he'd be, like, holding that pebble, like, super tight.

[Micah Risinger]

I'm imagining he's underneath me, like on my stomach, holding up as I'm crawling.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah, let's do that.

[Gus Sorola]

So Doug and Munther begin heading down the drain with Natty and Tol staying in the steam room. Is that correct?

[John Risinger]

Yep.

[Blaine Gibson]

Sounds good.

[Gus Sorola]

You go down or you. You're crawling. You know, it's a very tight space through the drain. Normally, Doug, it's a miracle you can fit in here. I don't understand that ability of yours, but you, Andy, defrain it for a while. And as you're crawling through in the tunnel, you reach a fork. A fork? Yeah. Not an eating utensil, Chris. The tunnel goes to the left and to the right.

[Chris Demaris]

And the little droplets, we don't see them anymore.

[Gus Sorola]

No, not at this point. They're exhausted.

[Micah Risinger]

Can Doug hear any sort of, like, noise or like the smell that that little piece of metal was in the puddle?

[Chris Demaris]

Oh, yeah.

[Micah Risinger]

Is that smell coming from either side more strongly?

[Gus Sorola]

Why don't you make me a perception check?

[Micah Risinger]

I meant to re roll that because I was a one. I'm gonna use my inspiration.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Die.

[Gus Sorola]

Okay.

[Micah Risinger]

16.

[Chris Demaris]

Not bad.

[Gus Sorola]

It's pretty good.

[Chris Demaris]

Yeah.

[Gus Sorola]

You feel like that smell that you're looking for seems to be coming from the left side. As you're sniffing, you smell it, you know I imagine Doug, like, kind of furrows his brow as he smells it. You hear a voice coming from the right side.

[Barbara Dunkelman]

Oh.

[Blaine Gibson]

Oh. Hello?

[John Risinger]

Is someone there?

[Gus Sorola]

All right, find out who the voice is. Find out what the smell is. On the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

[Blaine Gibson]

Natty, make sure you say goodbye and some salutations.

[John Risinger]

Salutation, everybody. Have a good old time, okay? You take care of yourself and say hi to your mama for me.

[Chris Demaris]

Can I request that if John is on Second Wind, he has to talk?

[Gus Sorola]

No, no, no. But if you subscriber on our Patreon over@stinky dragonpod.com Next week we'll have an episode of Second Wind where we're going to talk about this episode specifically and maybe we'll. We'll unveil some secrets.

[John Risinger]

Attention Stinky Dragon audience members. It's the holiday season, so we're having some deals in the Stinky dragon store. From November 24 to December 6, all orders of $75 or more you get 10% off. But if you spend more, you save more. Orders of $100 or more get 15% off. In orders of $125 or more get 20% off. Stock your inventory and boost your savings. New episodes of Tales from Sneaky Dragon premiere every other Wednesday wherever you stream podcasts and on the Stinky Dragon YouTube channel. Want to listen to the show 48 hours early and ad free? You can support us by becoming a patron@stinky dragonpod.com or join as a member on Beacon TV. Both give you early ad free access and Members Only Discord for each platform. Looking for even more stinky content and community perks, our Patreon offers exclusive bonus shows behind the scenes content, access to the Stinky Dragon Discord members Only livestream stinky community events and a shout out on the show. Just like ivory Wolf, Daniel Sweet 3N Steel, Meiko and Shorty 06608, these patrons directly support the show. Get ad free Free episodes Access to our Patron Only Discord server bonus content like Second Wind and Behind the Screen and other Stinky perks. Some of Our friends voiced NPCs in this episode and listeners who interacted with us on the Stinky dragon Discord had NPCs named after them. Zephyr Blake, named after Blake Nelson, voiced by Fuya at Fuya Flack, named after Flakes voiced by Micah Risinger, Ika Reisinger and Faunus Apollos, named after Fan of Motion, voiced by Eddie Rivas Dirivas. This week's Arrow Question was submitted by lauramar Star. This episode of Tales from Sticky Dragon was produced by Ben Ernst and Micah Risinger, written and composed by Micah Risinger and edited by Katherine Arnold. Tune in next time for another thrilling episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

[Gus Sorola]

Sam.

[Blaine Gibson]

So like, if I recall, the front line is a certain direction, but a lot of things that we also want to see, including bum laps, imprisonment are on the way.

[Gus Sorola]

Correct?

[John Risinger]

In Disney World.

[Blaine Gibson]

Disney World is a big one. We need to make a stop. We also need to go to the BUC EE's. That's a no brainer.

[John Risinger]

I love that boosies. It's great.

[Micah Risinger]

Experience. The sequel everyone's been waiting for with Sideline 2 intercepted, join Drayton and Dallas as they navigate the challenges of college life while trying to stay true to themselves and each other. Catch all the drama and watch Sideline 2 Intercepted starring Noah Beck and Sienna Agudong for free on tubi this Thanksgiving.

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[Gus Sorola]

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[Gus Sorola]

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