How To Outsmart A Cheater

Summary

Podcast Summary: "How To Outsmart A Cheater" Episode of Tall Blonde by Sarah Lauren

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Introduction

In the episode titled "How To Outsmart A Cheater," hosts Sarah Lauren and her friend Joelle delve deep into the complexities of relationships, particularly focusing on dealing with betrayal and personal growth post-infidelity. Presented by MBHTV and released on November 15, 2024, this episode offers unfiltered conversations, personal anecdotes, and actionable insights to help listeners navigate the challenging terrain of toxic relationships and self-improvement.

How the Hosts Met

The conversation begins with Sarah and Joelle reminiscing about their university days in Toronto. Sarah recounts how, despite not initially being close friends, shared experiences during the COVID-19 pandemic brought their core group closer, effectively turning them into a sisterhood over two years.

• Sarah (00:20): “Sometimes that comes back to you and you want that good feeling and those good things that are happening.”
• Joelle (02:09): “We're both from London... like an average size city compared to other cities.”

Experiences in Toronto and New York

Sarah shares her experiences of moving back to Toronto after a stint in New York, highlighting the stark differences between the two cities. She expresses nostalgia for Toronto's vibrant yet familiar environment and contrasts it with the overwhelming and less genuine vibe she felt in New York.

• Sarah (01:10): “So today we're going to be talking about we. How we met... but we'll talk about nightlife and everything before, like, literally three years ago.”
• Joelle (48:07): “Your overall vibe just wasn't there. I feel like when you lived in Toronto... you are like a social butterfly.”

Navigating Friendships Post-University

The hosts discuss the evolution of friendships after university, emphasizing the concept of "ambivalent relationships" as described by motivational speaker Mel Robbins. They explore the emotional fatigue that comes with maintaining superficial friendships and the importance of prioritizing meaningful connections.

• Sarah (17:56): “So that was a season where I would fall everywhere.”
• Joelle (18:19): “I feel like your true friends... I have some people that I do feel like it's an obligation or a chore.”

Understanding Toxic Relationships

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to dissecting toxic relationships and the psychological impact of being cheated on. Sarah introduces the concept of an "ick list"—a personal tool she developed to remind herself of the negative aspects of past relationships to prevent returning to harmful dynamics.

• Sarah (33:40): “I was like, A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Like everything that.”
• Joelle (35:21): “Just be happy without them. Create, like, a completely different life where they wouldn't even know how to fit into it.”

Strategies to Outsmart a Cheater

The hosts share practical strategies and mindset shifts to empower individuals dealing with cheating. Central to this discussion is the idea of distancing oneself both physically and emotionally from toxic environments and individuals. They advocate for embracing personal happiness as the ultimate form of "revenge."

• Joelle (34:37): “But the biggest revenge is just being happy.”
• Sarah (35:34): “You can't recover from that.”

Personal Growth and Life Coaching

Transitioning from past relationships, Sarah discusses her journey into life coaching and therapy. She highlights how these practices have enhanced her ability to understand and support others, as well as fostered her personal growth. This segment underscores the importance of self-awareness and continuous learning in overcoming relationship challenges.

• Sarah (23:46): “I'm still doing classes every Tuesday and Thursday for my life coaching, which has actually made me think of a lot of things in a different way.”
• Joelle (24:06): “What type of clients are you hoping to get? Like life coaching wise...”

Insights from Media: "Tell Me Lies"

The hosts discuss the TV show "Tell Me Lies," using it as a springboard to explore the intricacies of toxic relationships. They reflect on how media representations can mirror personal experiences, offering both validation and triggers for those who have been cheated on.

• Sarah (28:42): “Anyone that has ever been cheated on needs to watch this movie because it gives you such a different show.”
• Joelle (30:21): “It's very triggering because it's like, you have been that person before.”

Conclusion

As the episode wraps up, Sarah and Joelle reiterate the importance of self-care, setting boundaries, and prioritizing genuine relationships. They encourage listeners to seek personal happiness and growth as the most effective ways to move past the pain of cheating and build a fulfilling life.

• Sarah (35:36): “That's boys for you. And girls. Sometimes girls can be shitty.”
• Joelle (52:03): “But thank you guys for listening. Please subscribe...”

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Key Takeaways

1. "Ick List" as a Tool: Maintaining a list of negative experiences in past relationships can help prevent falling back into unhealthy dynamics.
2. Prioritize Meaningful Connections: Focusing on a smaller circle of true friends is more fulfilling than maintaining a large, superficial network.
3. Embrace Personal Growth: Engaging in life coaching and therapy can significantly enhance self-awareness and resilience.
4. Distance Equals Healing: Physically and emotionally distancing oneself from toxic individuals and environments is crucial for healing.
5. Media Reflection: TV shows and movies like "Tell Me Lies" can provide valuable insights and validation for personal experiences with toxic relationships.

Notable Quotes

• Joelle (00:20): “Time heals everything. But also, don't put yourself in crappy situations.”
• Sarah (33:40): “I was like, A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Like everything that.”
• Joelle (35:21): “Just be happy without them. Create, like, a completely different life where they wouldn't even know how to fit into it.”

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This episode of Tall Blonde offers a candid exploration of overcoming betrayal and fostering personal development. Through relatable stories and thoughtful discussions, Sarah and Joelle equip listeners with the knowledge and motivation to outsmart cheaters and cultivate healthier, more rewarding relationships.

Transcript

[A]

If you could remember all of the horrible things that an ex boyfriend or an ex best friend did to you, you wouldn't go back. But it's because the good things are at the front of your brain. Sometimes that comes back to you and you want that good feeling and those good things that are happening. So whenever I went to think or had those things in the front of my brain, I would go to that ick list.

[B]

Time heals everything. But also, don't put yourself in crappy situations. Distance yourself from the bad things. Distance yourself from the bar that you probably know that someone is going to be at distance heels as much as time.

[A]

Hello, everybody, and welcome back to my podcast, Tall Blonde. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to my podcast, Tall Blonde. We're here with another episode and another friend. The first actual time that no drinks involved. I didn't know if she was going to come over here with a bottle of wine or something and be like, I need this for the pod.

[B]

No, no, I'm good. I'm ready to go.

[A]

I'm ready. Good. So we don't need anything, but this is the first time I think I've been sober, too.

[B]

This is just pure, pure honesty.

[A]

Pure from the heart. So today we're going to be talking about we. How we met, and we'll go all the way back to university, college, whatever you want to call it for that one. But she's lived in Toronto for seven years. Seven years now. And I am back, but I only lived here for forward a bit before I moved to New York. And then a lot has changed, and now that I'm back, I'm like, holy crap. Things are still changing, and it's like a whole new world in the best way. I love it. But a lot has changed. So we're gonna talk and give everyone the little Toronto secrets, because we talked about nightlife and everything before, like, literally three years ago.

[B]

Yeah. So different.

[A]

And it's so different. We go to different place. We are different people now.

[B]

So much older now.

[A]

We're so. And more mature, I think.

[B]

I think so.

[A]

Yeah. I hope. But let's go back. Let's talk about how we met, who you are, where you come from. Give us the deeds. Give us a little intro on Joelle.

[B]

All right, so let's just start with how we met.

[A]

Okay. Going back into 2018. That was your second year? In my first year.

[B]

Well, we've met before then, though.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

We're both from London, which I like to describe to people who haven't been to London or who like, to hate on London as like an average size city compared to other cities. Like, it's big enough that you don't need to be friends with everyone, but it's small enough that even if you're not friends with them, you basically know who someone is or you know someone who's dated someone or who's related to someone. There's always like some type of tie in there. Anyways, we didn't go to the same high school, but I kind of. Kind of occasionally ran into you.

[A]

Yeah. And we, like, knew of each other, but we were never in the same friends.

[B]

We weren't friends. I wouldn't describe us as friends, but we just didn't know each other.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then I was already in my second year of university and you had just gotten there. And I love telling people London people always stick together. Like, they have a way of finding each other no matter where they are.

[A]

In the craziest way. Like, it's like, I know that you existed in my hometown, but I never knew how cool you were until we became friends in a different city.

[B]

So basically my year of university had a lot of London people in it. We had a full group of guys, full group of girls.

[A]

And we went to Ryerson, which is now Toronto Metropolitan University. So we were in a bigger city than we grew up.

[B]

Bigger city. But still the school was really tight with, like, who you hung out with. You'd hang out with people who went to your university. Not just like random other Toronto people at this point. But anyways, I'm pretty sure it was like Sarah and Michelle. Not Sarah, Rachel and Michelle. Maybe Rachel reached out to you, invited you to a pre. You had your dark brown hair showing up. And you are one of those people that will just be nice to everyone. Like, you just wanted to make sure that you were a friendly face to everyone. And everything was good.

[A]

And then didn't have my resting face on. I was smiling.

[B]

And then you really started hanging out in our group with them a lot, though not so much me, just because I did have my own stuff going on at the same time. And then like Covid happened and our core group was like five of us and we were hanging out, sitting at the dining room table every Thursday, Friday.

[A]

Saturday, we're on the couch watching movies.

[B]

Yeah. But just drinking around that table, the five of us. Because you couldn't do anything. You couldn't see anyone. We were.

[A]

We were the circle. Remember when they said you could only have your little. Yeah.

[B]

And that's when we became super close because you had no other option but to get to know someone and just to hang out every single day. And then we lived together for a.

[A]

Little bit and we were like, the five of us were like literally sisters. Like, we were family for those two years. And I can easily say all of us will be best friends forever. Like, even last weekend, like, literally a couple days ago, one of my roommates and our friends came for the weekend and stayed at yours and we went out, we went for dinner. So and whenever we go back home.

[B]

Which literally talking about this weekend, like that house that you had in school, everyone had like a time period where they lived in it. And it is actually, I feel like if we could be full grown adults all living in that house together, I.

[A]

Would love, I would literally love that. I would do anything. I would pay all the money that I have ever to just live in that house again or like a week end in the life in that house together.

[B]

Rent that house for a weekend. Just go. Yeah.

[A]

And we used to work, we used to go for runs together. And there was that one place where we would do that run sprint thing around. Yeah. And I passed it the other day and I saw all the kids in school and I was literally like, should I just sit down and like, watch people? Because I was missing it so much. I feel like a tourist pack in Toronto now. Like, because I was gone for two years, I come back and I to my roommate, like, when we're going anywhere, we were going to your place to pre. I was literally like, I love Toronto. Like, I was just looking out the window and I was taking a photo of the sea. Literally. I feel like a tourist and I love it. Like, I kind of think that you're moving away. She's moving back home to London. But I think that. Let's say you do come back. Fingers freaking crossed, praying to the gods. But let's say you do come back. I feel like you're gonna just cherish it so much more if you do.

[B]

I still cherish Toronto every day.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, I just joked that you take photos of the CN Tower. I still, I took one on the walk here. No, I took one on the walk here because I'm like, wow, you go anywhere else and it just, you. You forget how cool things are.

[A]

And like, when we're talking about the house that I used to live in, it was by the Eaton center, if you guys know where that is. And it was like in a different area, like a not so nice area than where we live.

[B]

It wasn't that nice, though. Until I left that area and realized how, like, it can be a little.

[A]

Sketchy over there and it's so much better prices, but it is. I think even during COVID it got a little sketchier too.

[B]

There's just. Yeah, it's just more touristy over there too. It's a little rougher, but I didn't feel. I never felt. Well, occasionally I felt.

[A]

Occasionally I got. Someone chased me home from the laws.

[B]

One morning, got punched by a homeless person.

[A]

One time when I was on.

[B]

I was on one of the runs, like, near the Loblaws, and I just ran by her and she punched me in the stomach. Do you not remember?

[A]

By the Loblaws. Yes, I. I remember you telling me this. And I got chased home leaving the Loblaws at that light. Yeah. By a random man.

[B]

I love Loblaws, though.

[A]

I love that Loblaws. But holy crap, does everyone just use that as their bait? I also saw, like, numerous times cops, like, jump people in the Loblaws, like, in full fights. I was like, well, that Loblaws had.

[B]

An LCBO on top of it.

[A]

True. Was big, like, steal, run, run through the Lobas. I was like, oh, my God, Everyone out the way. Like, people are literally being bodied through this gorgeous, beautiful Loblaws. I was like, this is the nicest. And you're just hit over by a homeless person.

[B]

It's actually a huge lob.

[A]

It's stunning, though. It has absolutely everything people like, when I was in New York in the States, I missed Loblaws so much.

[B]

Like, no, you even go. Trader Joe's had so, like, fancy, though. Like, it's not just, like, normal stuff.

[A]

West side Market, like, there's no, like, there's no law. There was like. There's a bunch of, like, chains, but, like, the Whole Foods was good, but it's just a little expensive. So Trader Joe's was great.

[B]

It's kind of like farm boy.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. And then that brings us to moving to. Closer to downtown. Well, we are downtown.

[B]

I would consider that downtown, though. I feel like we're more on the west side now because, like, you're in this area.

[A]

I'm slightly directionally challenged.

[B]

You go a street up, you're on King West. You go towards the water, you're near me. But we're more on the west side of Toronto.

[A]

Okay. Forever.

[B]

But it's still downtown Toronto. It's just the west side of downtown.

[A]

Yeah. Okay. Okay, I. I can agree with that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But we used to go out in Toronto at, like, such different places. Like, Downtown or like where we go out nightlife wise. Just this week, I think four new places opened and you haven't been to the King Taps. But Joel, it is the best vibe ever. Like, I made a pact with my roommate.

[B]

Better than the Earls.

[A]

Better than the earls. 100%, 100% hotter guys, more bigger place. Such a freaking vibe. I we, me and my roommate went there on Saturday. Hung over as balls. We literally went through. And I also have something to say after this.

[B]

I tried going there with that group I was with. Remember I texted you, being like, I'm coming to Kin Taps. It was midday.

[A]

That was Friday. Or no, Saturday.

[B]

Saturday. This was not like, this was happy hour, though. So I get why it was busy.

[A]

No, and happy hour is a incredible. $7 drinks for brunch, $10 drinks for happy hour, and a pizza there. You will not find that. And all the food's good there. Me and my roommate went, yeah, literally, please endorse us. But we went there on Saturday when I told you to come hungover. I really think when you tell people, like when you don't try to be perfect and you tell people how you are, like, I walked in being like, I am so hungover. I need a drink stat. They're like, where do you want to be sitting? Somewhere more quiet. I was like, no, throw me in. It's a Saturday. Throw me in. Throw me into the loud things. Wherever there's cute boys. I need energy. I need people to pick our energies up. Me and my roommate are single. So we went. And the stunning of a man, I think he was the manager because he was giving people a debrief on things. He gave us a free jug of sangria. He goes, how would you guys feel? I know you guys said you're hungover.

[B]

No way.

[A]

How would you feel of if we got you thing of sangria on the house? I go, I didn't even think this could get better. And I'm now in love with this place and that man that did that. If he's watching this, I hope take me on a date. I am so down. Yes. But I don't want to say it for purposes. If anyone else grabs him, snatches him up before I do. So he did do that for us. We enjoyed our lives. I went back again with my family. Like, I brought my parents there the next morning for brunch. Yes. They were here for a wedding. And then on Sunday they, like met up with us for lunch. So we went again. I went Friday night. Oh, my God. Friday night when we were Leaving. I don't think you were with me at this point because we went to.

[B]

Did you go to King Taps after? We went to the bar.

[A]

After 2pm a.m. after 2am wow. We went in with that new group. Yeah. They were like, you cannot get in. I'm like, yeah, we are. Our friends are inside. The whole. Our friends are inside. Nobody. Like, they're closing the place down.

[B]

Was there anything in there?

[A]

I think there was a few stragglers that were trying to get out and it's a bit of a blur. I'm not gonna lie. Amy probably knows more than I do, but I was like, trying to get him to look the other way so that we could just sneak in. I was like, just let us in. Like, we'll leave soon. I love it.

[B]

That's the place that you pick to try and go.

[A]

A place that I've never been before, like. And then I told him to look the other way and he was kind of laughing at me and Amy. So then we just snuck in the back. So we got in.

[B]

The boys got in too.

[A]

That is not in my memory. So I'm not sure.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But that's maybe how we lost them.

[B]

Goodbye.

[A]

But they were great. I liked them too. Were fun. But needless to say, King Taps is great. Chamberlains is a new one that's on the corner right across from Rubies. That's new.

[B]

Yeah, we went in there for one drink. I think it would be a really cute vibe on, like, it was busy because it was Friday night. I think on a Thursday night it would be a really good date spot. Or just for drinks before you go.

[A]

I agree. It's a bit of like a pub sit down vibe, but it's pretty. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Pub lounge. Yeah, a cross between a pub and a lounge. But, like, where. So, like. Yes, Cherries is great too. I love cherries, but it's like a.

[B]

It's like very casual.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it's. I'm not a fan. I know this is controversial. I don't like sitting when I'm going out because I get tired. And that's where you lose me compared to if we go somewhere that's lively, where I'm forced. Obviously everyone needs a break every once in a while. But I want to be able. Yeah, I want to be able to walk around and talk to a million different people on a night out. So I'm not a fan of cherries just because I feel like I'm kind of trapped in my seat.

[A]

And it's a good stop for one or have you been to the lounge downstairs?

[B]

Well, I. No, I haven't.

[A]

You would like that. It's very, very nice.

[B]

I went to Cherries on Saturday during the day to sit on their patio and that was a really good vibe because it was really laid back. We were wearing chill clothes. Their pizza is really good. But yeah, I just wouldn't. My mind doesn't go. We should go out and go spend five hours at Cherries tonight.

[A]

I'm not gonna lie. I haven't been to Cherries that much because I know that who shall not be named an ex did go to there quite often.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So I'm kind of scared to go back.

[B]

Don't be scared. Just. No need to. It's not worth it.

[A]

Not that I care. Like, I'm still gonna go wherever, but, like, if I know that that's a typical place, maybe I can avoid it with King Taps.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I still love Laissez Fairey. Did you know they're making a rooftop on top?

[B]

They should, because they have so many people.

[A]

They are making it good.

[B]

It's like a good business idea.

[A]

That's. That'll be nice.

[B]

Kind of over locals. That's a hot take. It's a good afters.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

After your night, go there. We used to live down there, and when we would bring people who aren't from Toronto to locals, they'd be like, why are you bringing me into a mosh basement?

[A]

It's literally bodies.

[B]

But I love it. Like, it's everywhere.

[A]

It's everyone we knew. Like, it was. It was like.

[B]

Yeah, it was like going to a house party.

[A]

So you walked in, you're like, hey. Because you know that when you get down those stairs, you're gonna be dancing on a table with your friends.

[B]

It's not somewhere I would go for my first drink of the night.

[A]

But, yeah, you definitely gotta be a little tipsy or intoxicated once you step into that part. But, I mean, we've had some pretty good nights. I remember in university, I mean. Yeah, university. I had like an episode of, like, I had a season. Not even an episode. I had a season where I would fall everywhere.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. Do you remember it shut down. What was Love Child? Yeah.

[A]

Did I fall there too?

[B]

The hospital?

[A]

I fell. I hit my head. I cracked my head open. I had to go to the hospital. Yeah, that was in that season. I did that. I fell my face. But the guy I was talking to, you know who.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Was my, like, picker upper. I would be like, literally limp and he would just like pick me up and he'd be like, we're not getting kicked out. And I was like, all right, we're not getting kicked out. I would literally fall down the stairs in the entranceway of places.

[B]

You're like, here. So pretty.

[A]

I know. How did they let me stay in there? Pretty privileged. I probably didn't even look good. I was probably like, even that, like.

[B]

One at Love Child. Like we used to love that place.

[A]

I miss it. But it's shut down.

[B]

Shut down.

[A]

Yeah. But that was, that was good times. Yeah, but it is different. Cuz a lot of people have left too.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Like a lot of our friends, but there are a lot of other people coming back in.

[B]

And plus, like, as I said in university, how we met was because we went to school together. Compared to. Now that we're older, in your mid-20s, your friends aren't only like people that you went to school with in Toronto. Like, you've met people through social media, going to the gym, even on like a night out. Through a boy that maybe introduced you to his girlfriends that you stayed close with after maybe the guy didn't work out.

[A]

But yeah, friends of the friends. Yeah.

[B]

So many people. And I'm always down to go with whoever. Literally, like, could I bring my friend with me to a pre at your condo?

[A]

I'd always say yes, same. And it's always like, the more the merrier. Until you, you know, if you don't vibe with them or something, okay, that's a different thing. But why not, like, why not just enjoy each other and have more friends? What's the. What's about in that. But that leads me to something that I watched today. Mel Robbins. Do you know who that is? Do you watch any of her podcasts? She's that really motivational speaker. She popped up on my TikTok and she was talking about ambivalent relationships.

[B]

What does that.

[A]

I know. I was confused too. I wanted to see if you're like.

[B]

Yes, yes, I do know that word, but please describe.

[A]

So they were. It's like when you, you know when you have that feeling where you're like, you have someone in your calendar and you like, don't really want to hang out with them, but like, they've been there. Yeah. And it's like after you hang out with them, you're kind of in your head where you're like, you know, I could have just been home watching Netflix.

[B]

Like, realistically, specifically for dating or like friendships.

[A]

Anything. Friendships, Anything. And she kind of described it as that, and it's like, you're not sure if you love it or hate it and if you want to hang out with them or if you even want to be there or whatever. And then after the fact, you're like, ugh, did I even really need to do that? And then you have to plan it in the planner for six months over later, whatever. And it's kind of like it takes more energy for you to hang out with them than it does for you to hang out with. With, you know, a toxic person. And it kind of drains you. So that's an ambivalent friend. And I was like, oh, my gosh.

[B]

So wait, did the friend do something to make you feel that way or just over time, it could be like.

[A]

She also gave the whole, like, you second guess. Like, are they using me? Are they wasting my time or are they trying to support me in this? Like, you were kind of questioning them, too. Because I feel like your true friends. Like, I would drop everything to hang out with you. I would drop everything to hang out with, like, the close people that I have in my life. I have some people that I do feel like it's an obligation or a chore.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I feel like if I kind of spent less time and stopped pressuring myself to actually hang with them, I'd have so much more time with, like, the people that I actually care about.

[B]

I feel like, two. Sometimes you don't want to accept the fact that maybe you've outgrown someone and you just don't really have that much in common anymore. So having to hang out with those people are, like, exhausting, but you just can't let go.

[A]

Yes. But also, like, actually, no, I agree with that fully. And I also think, like.

[B]

Or you're trying to, like, convince yourself that you want to.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But you really don't.

[A]

And I'm also at a point where I'm just like, if you aren't, you know, making me happier or benefiting, not, like, I'm not using anyone, but if you're not benefiting me and my love and my, like, affection and, you know, making me more motivated or whatever that may be in my life, and you're only causing negatives. I don't need you. Like, I'm cutting my circle.

[B]

Well, I was just about to say about a circle. I've reached a point where I just don't care about having a lot of friends. Like, as long as I have my five. My five main friends, I'm okay having Pete. Like, I'm okay having social Friends, like.

[A]

People to go out with and people in different places.

[B]

But I'm not interested in, like, having to force relationships to say that I have the most massive friend group. Like, if I'm going to host a party, do I have 30 best friends that I can probably invite to my party? No. But do I have five that I would have the most amazing time with compared to the other 25 that I.

[A]

Would switch the date of my party just so all five could be there? Yeah.

[B]

And I just feel like that's part of growing up. Like, you just don't feel the need to have everyone as your bestie anymore.

[A]

And I think that it also gets really confusing and like. Like, yes, after university, you're also changing your whole life. And, like, what you're doing and you don't just have to go to class anymore. And that's not just your own obligation, but it's also your whole life is changing in a sense of, like, what you want, what your values are, what your schedule's like, what you prioritize, how often you want to be in that social life. And that also affects the people in your life too.

[B]

Yeah. I also just feel like, as you said, you're done school now. You've been working for a few years. For me, it's been three years that I've been done school. Like, it just flies by. You also need to prioritize like friends at the same time. Like, you need to decide who's worth fitting into your newfound schedule compared to. In school, you could go do something every single night if you wanted to. At least in my case, you could, literally. And it didn't matter. Like, you would still be okay compared to now you're gonna make time to hang out with someone on a Friday night because that's the only day that you're free and that you don't work the next day. Then, like, that's who's important to you.

[A]

Yeah, I agree. But I'm like, now every now that you said the whole thing of, like, you could do something every single night, whatever, in university, I could still do something every single night.

[B]

Yeah, but that's just the type of career path that you chose. It's one that is, like, very social, one that is exciting all the time compared to someone who works a 9 to 5 desk job that can't show up late to work or has to be up at 7:30 every single morning.

[A]

True.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's not for me. And I hope I don't have to go down that path.

[B]

And you also work for yourself type thing compared to in those office settings. Other people are depending on you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So yeah.

[A]

But I just don't think the 9 to 5 is for me.

[B]

I don't picture you in the 9 to 5. I'm not putting it.

[A]

Watch me like in a year, like be at a desk job and have to be doing that, but you would.

[B]

Still be okay at a desk job.

[A]

You're so I did it. I did it. Yeah, yeah, you did do it. No, like I am the girl with 17 planners. I still have my written planner and my planner in my phone and my planner, my iPad and my planner, my laptop.

[B]

Yeah, like you'd be really good at getting everything done and like you, you're not forgetful or anything.

[A]

Well, I'm still in school also.

[B]

Yeah, you are in school.

[A]

I'm still doing classes every Tuesday and Thursday for my life coaching, which has actually made me think of a lot of things in a different way and speak in a different way and listen in a different way.

[B]

Definitely. What type of clients are you hoping to get? Like life coaching wise, like do you want relationship or just like overall positive vibes?

[A]

So I think that not only yes, of course, I probably will want to be doing, you know, like one on one life coaching, but I also think just for me and like taking this course as like a side hobby kind of thing makes me understand better, listen better, communicate better, give people. We don't like to call it advice, we like to call it coaching and helping you grow in the program. But like speaking to people and helping them grow. I think I do that in a better way now. And I think, I mean it's only been like two weeks, but it's just really helpful for people around me that are just talking to me and also me and how I view it like changes your perspective. But I'm also in therapy once a week, so I get the whole perspective of like a therapist. And now I'm seeing, I'm listening to my therapist and what she's saying to me and I'm like, ah, I learned that last week. Or like this is the difference between coaching and therapy. And it's like I'm really growing up and having open perspectives in a lot of different aspects of my life that I never did before. I was so like hard but like wrong, but strong in some ways. Like if I like that wrong. But yeah, I'm wrong. But strong sometimes in the sense of like if I, if I believe in something, I'll keep going. Even if you're trying to argue with it the other way now. I'm kind of, like, really good at putting myself into different perspectives and seeing, like, why people behave the way they do. Like, I'm now understanding my past relationships, whether that was friendships or romantically, and seeing it as a different perspective. I'm like, you were hurt. This. That whole situation said so much more about you than it did about me, Especially in, like, being cheated on. I'm like, you were hurting. You had an insecurity about a certain thing which made you react in a certain manner and say these things. And that is called whatever. Maybe it was narcissism. Maybe it was the other one I learned today, Darvo, which is another thing that's, like, so prevalent in men and probably females, too, and everybody. But a lot of the times it is. It stems to something, and it's called something because it isn't just happening to me and only me by one man. It's happening to a lot of people by, you know, their family, their friends or whatever. And I'm just understanding it now as a broader picture because it's not just happening to me because it's me. It's happening to me because this person is dealing with this. Just like I deal with anxiety every day. Somebody might be dealing with a behavior thing for sure. And I think I had to deal with every. A man from every sick, single different behavior thing they could go through ever.

[B]

Yeah. I also just feel like it's part of growing up, though.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is like experiencing different kinds of relationships with maybe people who are super emotionally immature or aren't ready to be serious or can't communicate. Yeah, I can't communicate or just don't know how to communicate yet. I feel like girls, obviously, everyone always says we grow up much faster. Or like, even our parents said when we were younger, like, you'll understand one day. Like, it'll just come to you one day. And I feel like we're kind of getting closer to that one day compared to some of those past relationships, especially the ones that you've been in. I don't think they're close at all. But, like, hopefully one day they'll come to the same realization that you finally have.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know. But sometimes people are who they are, and you can't just expect them to change for you for sure. And, like, I thought that even, like, one of my exes, like, the things that he did to me, I was like, why did you do that to me? And then you can just move on and be, you know, this different person. For somebody else, but in reality and behind closed doors, they're doing the same thing to just a different person.

[B]

Or maybe they're still that same person, but the person that they're with is different or reacts differently or takes things differently. So it's just not as in your face compared to how it was to you. They just haven't gotten to that point yet.

[A]

Yeah. So, yeah, I totally agree. So we've been watching this show. You told me to start watching it called Tell Me Lies and Lou in.

[B]

The States and Disney in Canada.

[A]

Okay. My. Yeah. Okay.

[B]

Just in case someone hasn't watched it.

[A]

But it's. I mean, a lot of sex scenes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Get steamy real quick. But I literally was watching it. And anyone that has ever been cheated on needs to watch this movie because it gives you such a different show.

[B]

It's a show.

[A]

Oh, sure. It gives you such a different perspective as to how the female brain works and how the male brain works. Do you agree?

[B]

Yeah. Well, also, like, I don't even think it's just about, like, people who are getting cheated on. I think the entire concept is people who are so in love with someone in the most toxic, unhealthy relationship and can't step out.

[A]

And I think that being toxic and doing those games and playing those games is a form of, like, your early 20s and like your late teens. So, like 18, 19, 20, like, you're playing those games. It's not too serious. You know, there's no kids involved.

[B]

And you're in university.

[A]

You're in university. In university, you're not even thinking of a family or a marriage or anything. So it's like that toxic energy. But everyone goes through it to some degree, and it makes you feel for the people in that. Like, you picture yourself as one of the characters.

[B]

Definitely. And I feel like the toxic relationships are the ones that almost feel like the most passionate at the same time. But I've seen so many people on social media say that the show is actually really triggering for them to watch.

[A]

It was.

[B]

It very turns their stomach because it's like, you. You have been that person before, and you're watching the show being like, oh, my God, I can't believe he's acting that way and she's reacting that way, vice versa. But then if you try and picture yourself in it, you're like, would I have done any better that I didn't.

[A]

Even think of it from that perspective? Because when I'm watching it, I'm thinking of being one of the two girls that he's moving back, hopping back and forth with. And I'm like, how is he doing that? Like, how the hell is he having sex with one girl and then telling the other girl that he loves her and he misses her, and then going back to this girl and taking her on a date and then going into the washroom during the date to tell the other girl that he's gonna sleep over that night? I'm like, that was what was happening to me. And I was like, when you said triggering, yes, I was triggered. Yes, I was. But I'm watching it, and I'm seeing how it's. It clarifies to me that it's not just me. Like, it didn't just happen to me, and it wasn't. It didn't happen to me because I was me. It happened to me because it's. This is what some people do. But it's crazy how you can put yourself into a character and be like, basically watching your life. Like, it's like you're. I don't want to say dead and watching your life back, but a little bit.

[B]

But, like, everyone who watches the show, who tweets about it, post stories about it, post tiktoks about it, they're like, why doesn't the girl in the show just leave? Like, you. It's your fault. Like, you have every, like, ounce of. It's not that, but that's what. Then people are, like, resonating with, like, okay, you can watch a show and be like, this girl should just walk away, but then obviously you've experienced. Like, people can tell you to walk away, but, like, it's very hard to walk away from something so toxic.

[A]

And there was this one thing that I did that has been really helping me and helped me from, like, my last breakup. It was an ick list because. And it's. I know it sounds stupid and, like, how could that help? But, you know, okay, there was this, like, I was talking to my therapist about this. I don't know where we found these facts, but there was a thing that declared that if a woman could remember the pain that she felt when she was giving birth, she would never have kids again. She would never give birth again. But she forgets because of all the good things that have gone to the front of her brain about that child and that baby that she loves and whatever, that she has it again. So if you could remember all of the horrible things that an ex boyfriend or an ex best friend did to you, you wouldn't go back. But it's because the Good things are at the front of your brain. Sometimes that it comes back to you and you want that good feeling and those good things that are happening. So whenever I went to think or had those things in the front of my brain that I was like, oh, I'm lonely. And he made me feel less lonely or he made me feel. He told me this about whatever. He said I was the prettiest girl in the world. I would go to that ick list and be like. And just look at. And it was traumatizing to write. Horrible feeling having to bring back up everything. But I was like, A, B, C, D, E, F, G. Like everything that.

[B]

I'm like, so many that.

[A]

And it gives you that pit. And I even wrote down, I was like. When I found out about things and my heart would drop to. Out of my butt. And then I'm like, oh, my God. That feeling that takes over your body. I'm like, I never want to feel that again. So, no, I will never get back with that man. And the ick list has saved.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Lives.

[B]

But I also just feel like now that you look back and stuff, like, you know that wasn't healthy and now you're ready to, like, look for something that is healthy.

[A]

And time is the biggest healer. And, like, people are like. I just. I'm a firm believer that everybody, they all. They always come back. And I can guarantee my ex will reach out to me again and within the year. But I truly think time is the biggest healer. And over time, you will become more content and understanding of the situations that you're in.

[B]

I also. You haven't gotten to season two of the show yet, but this isn't really a spoiler. It doesn't matter. Between season one and two is summertime, and the girl who's in the toxic relationship goes home for the summer and, like, doesn't talk to anyone.

[A]

Great.

[B]

And she comes back, like, a little bit more healed. But people have been saying online, like, time heals everything, but also distance. Don't put yourself in crappy situations. Like, distance yourself from the bad things. Distance yourself from the bar that you probably know that someone is going to be at. Don't follow someone. Don't text someone. Like, distance heals as much as time if you just remove yourself enough.

[A]

Yes. And the biggest revenge is just being happy.

[B]

Yeah. Just be happy without them. Create, like, a completely different life where they wouldn't even know how to fit into it.

[A]

They couldn't fit into that at all.

[B]

They wish they could, but they can't. They don't even know where to start.

[A]

They're like, oh, my God, I wish that I stayed with that person because I would have gotten all these perks and benefits. But, I mean, that's boys for you. And girls. Sometimes girls can be shitty.

[B]

Yeah. The girl in the show is equally.

[A]

Shitty as, like, which one?

[B]

The main girl.

[A]

Like, the blonde?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Really?

[B]

She gets, like, really scary.

[A]

Like, I like her.

[B]

She's fun to watch. But, like, as the show goes on, she is so toxic to him back. Oh, like, really, like, manipulative.

[A]

Well, because she's probably like, I need to do this for.

[B]

Yeah. Like, he started it. Like, he made her.

[A]

But, I mean, two. Two wrongs don't make right.

[B]

Yeah. Then she got crazy, too.

[A]

But I got crazy, too. I mean, but that was, like, because.

[B]

Of someone else's actions.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Would you have acted that way from the start if, like, certain things hadn't happened?

[A]

No. And, like, how do we not realize that? Like, how do we not just take a step back and be like, that person made me act so out of character?

[B]

It's, like, a thing to look back on in a way. It's like, I can't believe I did that.

[A]

Yeah. There's so many things that I'm just like. I mean, I learn a lot the hard way. Unfortunately, my dad would say that every single day. Like, every single. Every single day. Like, quite literally every single day, Sarah.

[B]

You learn the hard way.

[A]

And I'd be like, I had to go through everything. If someone told me the answer, I'd be like, no, I have to figure it out myself. Like, I want to figure it out myself. So I've been in a lot of shitty situations only because I need to figure it out my way, which is normally the hard way. Whether that is getting over or being toyed with or being lied to, whatever that may be with friends or boyfriends or whatever. But I do think that it made me a stronger person. Like, I don't take back being cheated on. I would never take back being cheated on and being put into the situations that I was, because I think I'm so much stronger of a human being and so much more understanding to other people's situations. And, I mean, I'm not relating any. Like, what's happening on that show is not exactly what happened to me by any means. But you can relate to people's issues. You can relate to people's feelings. Or I can now just put myself into a perspective of someone even just being hurt by someone that they love because I'm like, I understand the heartache, I understand the feeling. I understand the betrayal. And I think I also feel like.

[B]

Once you start hurting someone that much, the way like you've experienced in life, the way in the show, like, you can't recover from that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

In that relationship, like that show's relationship, they're never going to end up together because they have been like. So there's been so many, like, bad things happening in that relationship.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's not what a healthy relationship.

[A]

No. And like, there's some things that you just can't come back from. Like, you can try, but like, how are you ever going to trust someone again that did.

[B]

Good luck.

[A]

And like, there's this whole saying of, like, don't. If you get served a shitty meal at a restaurant, you wouldn't go back. So why would you go back to an ex that treated you shitty? You know, I went to my get my nails done today and I know.

[B]

I just looked at them.

[A]

No, like, I think they did something wrong. My whole nail.

[B]

Like, are these your real nails?

[A]

So. Yes. So I got fake gel nails put on them and then she was filing them down to give a refill and I think they. No, they put it on wrong. And they had to take half of my nail because it bubbled. And it's called something that's like, really bad. Kate, stop making me feel worse about it.

[B]

It's not ugly bad. It's just like, I can't believe they did that to you.

[A]

Yeah. So they gave me this like, free stuff and they told me I could have a free appointments done for a little bit. Well, I. She was like, well, I can just go over it. I said, take every acrylic gel off of my nail right now. I don't know what you put on, but it's dying my nail from the root up. I'm like, what is happening? My 1. Everything else is fine.

[B]

Well, the sand looks really good. I was actually looking at it being like, are those your real nails right now?

[A]

Yeah, they're my real nails. But like, oh my God, I thought I was coming out with these long, pointed Halloween themed nails. No, I was, I was starting to take a tick tock and I'm like, well, this isn't gonna work.

[B]

You should have.

[A]

Like, I was literally got my nails done with me, but they booked me an appointment because I felt bad because they were like, oh, no, no, like, we'll book you, we'll give you a free appointment in the next two weeks. I don't even think this nail is going to Grow back in the next two weeks. I think it's going to take months, so I'll just. And I've never been nail less, like, what? And I also always wear like long acrylic nails. And I'm just going to be this au natural girl with one nail, not even on the finger in like the.

[B]

Season that's the most fun to get your.

[A]

Literally, I was going in for this burgundy brown color, cherry really long. I was like. And I come out literally in tears. I was like, what the fuck? I messaged my roommate and I was.

[B]

Like, did you pay for it?

[A]

Yeah, I had to pay for it.

[B]

I wouldn't have paid for it.

[A]

Well, but I only paid for them to take the gels off.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Because I went in assuming I was going to get a refill gel and shellac and I got a removal. But needless to say, the only reason why I said that we got so off track there. But I meant that because when you go to a nail place and they give you bad service, you don't go back. So I don't know how to cancel that appointment because I didn't make it. They made it. I haven't got any money come from when you go to a restaurant.

[B]

Don't go back to the nail salon.

[A]

No. So, like, I'm just hoping it's not infected because my whole skin underneath the nails.

[B]

See, over the last seven years in Toronto, I never found a nail salon that I really loved. Like, there's certain ones in London that I just think are so good. Every time I get my nails done here, I swear, like, they're always breaking and stuff.

[A]

Well, I literally in. I've gotten my nails done like acrylics and like gel for probably seven years. And this is the first time I've had an epic fail. This is literally like I looked at her and I go, is this a disease? Like my nails falling off? And she was like, no, no.

[B]

When she put it on. Like, you know how sometimes you put it under the light?

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. But I was tick tocking it to search about, like, what they did and what happened to my nail. And it said if it was like the wrong application and there was like a bubble within the gel and how they put it on or if like you like have like a huge weight drop on it. But I was like, my nail would have fell off or I would have been bruised if something dropped on it.

[B]

Was that hand already done? Like, did they get through a hand before that?

[A]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

That would have been so annoying. Because the nail salon takes so long.

[A]

I was there for an hour and a half, though, just talking to the lady. I'm like, how did this happen? She's like. I go, this has never happened in seven years of me getting acrylics. Like, she goes, this happens all the time. I say it once a week. I go, maybe you need to stop seeing it once a week.

[B]

Maybe you're the problem.

[A]

Maybe this is the problem here. Like, when everyone is saying you're the problem, you're normally the problem. But needless to say, if you ask me where to get your nails done, I will not be sitting there. Yeah, I brought my points card, and they're like, do you remember? I was like, no, no. I'm throwing that thing out when I go home.

[B]

I'm not coming back.

[A]

Sorry. But, yeah, so, I mean, very fun in Toronto. But don't get your nails done. Don't get me nails done. Go back to London. I'm also getting. I get, like, my hair done and everything. Back in London, Ontario, I've never found, okay, a great place.

[B]

Love Toronto. But, like, why is everything here? An extra 500 to do the most basic stuff. I don't even want to know what your hair would cost in Toronto.

[A]

Somebody said to me, I will never.

[B]

Get my hair done here. My hair stylist in London is the best, and she has amazing prices. And I come here and people can't even do it half as she can.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it's like, all right, that'll be $700.

[A]

I literally. It was so funny. So I have obvious. Not obviously. I have extensions. Oh, my God. Secrets out. No. Everyone knows. But I have extensions. I've always have, always will. And my legs are. I. I know. And I have, like, these, like, wef things. But my hairdresser that I like, grew up with, that I've had since I was, like, greedy. But when I came to Toronto, I had to get somebody else. And then when I moved to New York, I got somebody else. But I was. I would always, like, go back to her whenever I could. And I messaged her and I was like, hi, I'm back. I just moved back to Canada. Can I get in, like, stat? And she was like, okay. My first open availability is. It was this. It's this Wednesday, so I'm getting my hair done this Wednesday, so watch out.

[B]

But, like, you're getting the beads moved up.

[A]

I don't even know what she can do. She goes, don't even tell me what's going on. We'll just assess when we get there, I go that's scary. That's magical.

[B]

I'm like magical, but it's scary cuz.

[A]

I don't want to have to try to explain it to her. And she's like, she's been my hairdresser forever. Like she understands.

[B]

You're going to get done in London Wednesday or here?

[A]

London. Oh, you're going home just for the like hair. Okay, so I'll drive there and drive back because I have an event on Thursday. But yes, but then somebody literally said to me yesterday. Not yesterday, last week. And they were like, oh my gosh, like you have such gorgeous natural hair. I was like, thank you.

[B]

Never tell someone.

[A]

He was notice he was like.

[B]

He.

[A]

Was like oh well, not a lot. It shows great deal about your health. Like a lot of people don't have great hair, especially blonde. And I was like, yeah, I guess I take.

[B]

How would he know that one? Just weird that a guy would like know that but he has a child. Okay, but never mind. Not sorry, man with child.

[A]

But yeah, it's kind of funny. Like I remember my friend would always. Whenever she starts hooking up with someone, she goes and runs to the washroom and takes out the clips and comes back with like 3 inch shorter hair and just, just cuz she's scared that he'll like touch it in the back.

[B]

Do I know this person?

[A]

No. Someone from.

[B]

Okay, yeah. Okay.

[A]

So I was like, I mean that's one way to do it. But I like they're literally embedded in my head. Like you can't even pull them out if you tried. Like I feel like most people wear especially blondes. Like they're literally 99, 95% of us have extensions.

[B]

If you have blonde hair that's not natural. Like not. I think you're blonde regardless. But like someone who has bright blonde hair, there's a 95% chance it is not real. Like it just, it can't.

[A]

And honestly, 90% of the times guys don't even know. They're confused. And if they do know, who gives a?

[B]

It's also real hair.

[A]

So no. And so I went no.

[B]

I saw this one. You know like the Mormon Tik toks where like they all get like no.

[A]

I don't have Mormon tiktoks on my TikTok. That is not my algorithm.

[B]

Mormon women have the most gorgeous faces in hair because part of their religion is to try and reach perfection. I learned this on the Secret Life of Mormon Wives.

[A]

Okay, watch it.

[B]

It's really good.

[A]

Someone else talked about that Anyway, so.

[B]

They all have extensions, essentially. And the one woman on the show is the hairstylist. And the one girl was like, oh, my gosh. Like, it looks so good. Like, I wish this was my hair. And the hairstylist is like, it is your hair. You bought it.

[A]

It's true.

[B]

And it's real human hair.

[A]

I went to the hair salon and it was something similar to that. I had, like, whatever. My hair in a pony. And the girl goes, you have such gorgeous hair. I go, thank you, but I bought it. And she goes, that's okay. It's yours. It's on your head. And I go, exactly.

[B]

You think celebrities have real hair?

[A]

No, no, no. Celebrities are not real. Okay. Living in New York for two years, I realized nothing is real. You can pay for absolutely anything you want.

[B]

I feel like New York is at least more real than, like, an LA or, like.

[A]

Yeah. Thing.

[B]

Miami.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I feel like people at least look a little bit more natural in New York compared to some of the other places.

[A]

I don't think so.

[B]

Okay. Well, again, I haven't been there that much.

[A]

You were just traumatized by some things that I've seen in New York.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay, since we're talking about New York, I'm gonna ask you one more question before we wrap this up. You. When I told you you're one of the first people I told about leaving New York, why was your answer? I knew you hated it, and I knew you wanted to come home. How did you know?

[B]

Okay, well, I came with Nikki. Nikki and I came to visit you in New York.

[A]

First year I moved there.

[B]

Yeah. That was only four or five months. We came in November, and you had been there since August.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So like, four months since you moved to New York. I went and saw your place and your overall, like, neighborhood. You lived in the most beautiful place in neighborhood. Okay. Like, it wasn't about where you actually were. You introduced me to a couple people. They were nice, too. Like, we would hang out with them if they were in Toronto. Maybe not today, but like, back then. Yeah. Love you guys, if you're watching, but, like, just your overall vibe just wasn't there. I feel like when you lived in Toronto, especially, because I did have a couple months of living with you. I saw your habits. You had a gym you liked here, a trainer you liked here. You had a life that you loved here. You are like a social butterfly. London is close enough to Toronto that you already had that aspect going for you because you're one of the few people from London who want to pursue being, like, into, like, lifestyle and fashion and beauty. And then in Toronto, same thing. You made a name for yourself in a city that has millions of people in it. You go to New York, I feel like it kind of hit you in the face that there was so many people trying to do the same.

[A]

The same thing I was trying to do.

[B]

And you were like, whoa. Like, no one here is as genuine as how it was here. Like, I feel like you felt the need to always be going out to these random events that you wouldn't want to go to and just be go, go, go, go, go. Compared to here, you could still thrive but take it easy and have a routine at the same time. I also just feel like you made such good connections here and you just couldn't find, like, the people that clicked in New York. I feel like if everyone you loved was in New York, maybe it would have been a little different. Yeah. But it just. It just wasn't what you thought it would be. And I could just see. I could just see it in you from that moment. It took you, like, two more years after that to even admit to me that I was right. But I just feel like when you spoke about Toronto, your eyes would sparkle.

[A]

Everyone said that when you talked about even my friends in New York. Like, I. I met some amazing friends in New York, and I'll still be.

[B]

Friends from New York. Well, you brought those girls from New York here, and they're like, okay, like, this is just like any other city.

[A]

I'm like, you don't get it.

[B]

This is Toronto.

[A]

Like, Toronto is the. Yeah, I do have some great friends in New York, and I'll be best friends them for a lifetime. But I want them to move here and I want them to come visit here because I feel so amazing here, and I'm so happy that you saw that too.

[B]

I also feel like you thought you needed to move to New York to succeed. You got a job in New York. It wasn't even what you wanted to do. Now you're back here, you can get back into doing what you want to do. You can be successful in Toronto. People, like, fail to remember that Toronto is one of the cities in this country with the most opportunity.

[A]

And I'm only, like, you're only gonna succeed when you're happy. Like, people have said. My old manager that I did just part ways with, she literally was like, you just look happier in Toronto. Like, your content. I can see it through, through how you speak, how you carry yourself. You're just happier And I'm like, I was fighting it for so long, but I love it here.

[B]

And plus, New York to Toronto is an hour in the air. Like, it's nothing. You can go visit New York. You can go to events in New York so that there was, like, a massive event in New York. We could go. Like, it's not that bad.

[A]

So true.

[B]

I just feel like for now, you're meant to be here. Are you going to be here forever? I don't know.

[A]

I don't even know.

[B]

But I feel like you were forcing yourself to stay in New York and you didn't want to be there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then when you finally told me you were coming home a couple months.

[A]

Ago, I was like, yay. And then when you told me that you're leaving in a couple, we don't talk about that. Okay. But thank you guys for listening. Please subscribe. Tell me what you want. Talk to me about any of your issues. DM me, because I will start to complete compile them into, like, topics and make more themes and episodes on what you guys want to hear, because I always want to answer your questions. I love you. Please tune in on all socials. And thank you, Joelle, for, you know, entertaining us with this one. Thanks for having this won't be her last time.

[B]

No, I'll be back. I'm always back.

[A]

Yeah, she's always that somehow. Okay, love you guys.