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- [00:00]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Reason why I started podcasting because I went through so much emotionally. I wish I had someone talking about their anxiety and being bullied or getting cheated on because I didn't have that growing up. And I'm so happy that I am here on this couch today in a happy state and able to talk about it.
- [00:15]
Heather Simkowski
And I think I'm trying to putting myself first. And that's just making me do something to exercise or whatever. But it's important that I find time to do something for myself and not just for everybody else all the time.
- [00:26]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Hello, everybody, and welcome back to Tall Blond. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to Tall Blonde by Sarah Lauren. And that is Sarah Lauren Simkowski. So I want to introduce you guys to some people, so I'm going to bring them in. And these are the Simkowskis. Okay? So I don't know who's going to be talking the most, but we're going to have to pass the mics around, so be generous, okay. With passing this around. So I do go by Sarah Lauren, and a lot of people randomly call me Lauren, which I don't know why, but that is my middle name. And my last name is Simkowski, for those of you who don't know. And this is the Simkowski bunch. So we're gonna start off by just doing a little blurb, a little bio, not too long of who we are. But first of all, since you think this is hilarious, since you think this is hilarious, how are you feeling today?
- [01:34]
Jennifer Simkowski
I am probably the most refreshed out of the bunch up here this morning. I feel really great, as you can probably see with the bags under my eyes. Yeah, I had a rough morning. Our podcast is probably an hour and a half to two hours late. I will take full credit for that, but it might not surprise any of the viewers, especially all my friends, because I am known to be quite late now.
- [01:55]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
She used to be really good at the timing thing, but that has rapidly decreased over the years. But we did have our Thanksgiving dinner last night, and we will go around to do a kind of recap on what we did, because my mom had the great idea of doing what we're thankful for. And I think that tells a lot about our family, too. In the dynamic, as much as we may get in screaming arguments or crazy times, we do love each other. But what was your excuse for your hangover this morning?
- [02:33]
Heather Simkowski
Something you ate?
- [02:35]
Jennifer Simkowski
Yeah. I blame the food.
- [02:38]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
We're all confused about.
- [02:40]
Jennifer Simkowski
Dad said maybe it's the red wine. We're not sure. A combination of both.
- [02:44]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Pete's Excuse was you woke up with a sinus infection was added.
- [02:51]
Peter Simkowski
Yes. No, not a sin. A sore, very sore throat. That was concerning me.
- [02:56]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
It wasn't. It's honestly hilarious, the lies that we tell ourselves to just say when we are hungover because my mom is on our asses about to not to stop drinking. Because it is something that we all quite enjoy, but we enjoy even more doing it as a family. But because you try so hard to push us away from it, I think that we now have to make crazy excuses.
- [03:21]
Heather Simkowski
Reverse psychology. I guess I have to change it up a bit. Then we might have drink a lot.
- [03:27]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
So we're all working on that. We're all still growing in that aspect, but I think we're doing pretty good. And the excuses are very creative. So I'm glad that we have a creative family. So let's go and we'll start with the eldest father. You can give us that hurt.
- [03:44]
Brian Simkowski
That's kind of a punch in the nose. A brief little bio for those who I haven't met out there. My name is Brian Simkowski and I'm the proud father of these three and the proud husband of Heather Simkowski. So I own a brewery. So when Heather says, stop drinking, I'm actually on the other side of it saying, please drink more. And I think that's it.
- [04:09]
Heather Simkowski
So thank you, Brian. My name is Heather Semkowski. I originally was from Winnipeg, so I'm a prairie girl. I make our whole family go back. It's mandatory attendance every Christmas to go to Winnipeg when it's very, very cold. But we get to see all of my family. I'm the proud mother of these three lovely children and we are very excited when they all do come home. So that's it from my end. Here's Peter.
- [04:44]
Peter Simkowski
I'm Peter.
- [04:47]
Jennifer Simkowski
I'm keeping both of them.
- [04:49]
Peter Simkowski
I'm Sarah's oldest brother.
- [04:52]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
You're my only brother.
- [04:54]
Peter Simkowski
I'm Sarah's only brother, but I'm the oldest brother. I'm the oldest and I live in Toronto with Sarah, with my girlfriend Maddie. And I own a company called aux where we do technology installations. And that's across Canada and the U.S. but yeah, so I've been in Toronto for about five years. Sarah recently moved back there and it's been great having her in the city again. And yeah, it's great. Yeah, it is, it is. It was tougher when Sarah was young, where there's an age gap in high school. So you're kind of. I didn't get to go to high school with her and more protective. But now as we've grown, we've become more friends, which is awesome. So we go out together, have similar friend groups.
- [05:35]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
I think we are each other's friend groups.
- [05:37]
Peter Simkowski
We are each other's friend groups. Yeah.
- [05:39]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Sometimes I'll go out and I'll see run into his friends and I honestly think they're mine. And not even if Peter's not there. I'm like, that's fine.
- [05:46]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I'll hang out with you and I'm fine. Or they'll snap me with Sarah just saying that. Yeah, they're out at the bar. I'm like, yeah, there you go.
- [05:54]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
We try everything to get you out, but sometimes you put your foot down.
- [05:57]
Peter Simkowski
Yes.
- [05:58]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah, that was a good one.
- [06:01]
Jennifer Simkowski
Thank you.
- [06:01]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Jen doesn't get the whole Toronto experience.
- [06:04]
Jennifer Simkowski
Yet, but yeah, no, I appreciate Toronto for a good 48 hours tops. And then I really like leaving it. My name's Jennifer. I'm the middle child. I live in Ottawa. I'm the only one that's not on this side of Toronto or close by, but I live in Ottawa with my dog Oakley. What else am I supposed to say? What do you do?
- [06:25]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
She just actually.
- [06:28]
Peter Simkowski
What do you do?
- [06:29]
Jennifer Simkowski
Maybe what do I do? For fun? No, for a job. I. I'm a teacher. I teach grade five now and I'm excited about that. Other than that. Not too much. I don't do too much.
- [06:40]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
She got her first or her full time gig in teaching grade five, which was a big accomplishment. It is not easy to be a teacher now. Right. Because there's so many people trying to get in that same career path, whatever that thing's called. But let's kind of swoop back into last night and explain a bit about what we said. We were grateful for this year especially and over the past year because we are a very close knit family and we do a lot together. We still do March break trips because Jen's in that school curriculum. So our March break is her March break. But we still do all those trips. We still hang out as much as we can. We all found it a little like appreciative of the fact that we all just wanted to even come back for this Thanksgiving because I know a lot of people that didn't go back to their family or couldn't get back to their family because they were living too far. And because I'm back in New York now, it was a lot easier. But at the same point like Jen had to drive six hours or. And come back to Toronto from New York. But Jen still had to drive six hours, so that was a hike. I had to drive hungover, that was a hike. Pete had to drive traffic and our parents appreciated it. So explain you know, your take on that in a little brief sum up of what we said last night.
- [08:07]
Brian Simkowski
So what I said, what I'm thankful for is this, this whole thing of being, having what we have, being where we are living close enough that we get to see each other and the fact that everybody comes comes to see us. The second thing would be us, this people on this couch and Maddie that our family is together. And I think that's what I'm most thankful for, is that we're able to do this together.
- [08:36]
Heather Simkowski
I said very similar things to Brian. I am very thankful and grateful for the health of all of us and that our kids get along really well and they want to be together because you can't force that happening. And they are actually really good friends with a lot of our friends kids too, which I think we're very thankful for. I also added last night that I was very grateful that my mother and dad are still alive and healthy. Ernie, my stepdad just turned 100 this year so we. Yep. And he's remembers everything from when he was a little kid. My Mom's just turned 85 this year too. So very grateful for not just the health of us but also of my family too, so. And very proud of our kids. I think I mentioned that before, so that's the second.
- [09:25]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Say it one more time.
- [09:27]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I think on my end it's going to be like the same thing said every time. But just having everyone happy, healthy and they like to be together is the biggest thing. So Sarah, being in Toronto with our friend groups, being actually friends there is awesome. And seeing Jenny, which again is the same thing. We just love being together and with our parents it is like it's family but it's like friendship too when you're able to have fun just being with them and enjoy just going down to be with them.
- [09:54]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And with that being said, like, I mean we are so close knit and we are such a loving bunch and we're always there for each other. I mean I remember being bullied in school and I had like my family had my back 100 times over. They would do anything if that if I needed it and we would all do the same going through anything in life. But I do want to preface that we are not perfect. We have our times. Sometimes I hate you all, but I do end up loving you. But no family's perfect. And we're not trying to be perfect. We are very much so in our, you know, own walks of life, all five of us. And I think it's just really nice because we also keep each other in check. We do. I do get told sometimes I'm wrong, but strong, and that's fine. True and fine. But, you know, we're all people at the end of the day, and we have feelings, we have emotions, we go through things. But I'm just happy that we always come back because sometimes you go through fights as families and you hear stories of people that you don't come back from things. And I think that we've all never experienced that and hopefully do never experience that. But what is your guys's take on just like as being a parent, what you would even give as tips as to how families kind of could get over things or should get over things or what's your take on it?
- [11:23]
Heather Simkowski
I don't know. I think I just want to maybe add to what you were saying too. I think what I like about this group is, you're right, we're not perfect. I have anxiety. I also like things in order. And I know we each have our own kind of special, unique qualities, but we appreciate that. So when one of us is getting really anxious or doing something, you're not going to jump on them. You kind of understand that that's just them and maybe helping them navigate through it. And same with the families, too. Like, my family is not perfect. People here have called them the Addams Family because they're very different in many specially unique ways. And then even Brian's family, like, everybody's got things you're dealing with. But I think if you navigate, understand where they're coming from, like, we're all not perfect. And forgiving, being able to say, you know, maybe we are looking at things a little differently. Can we communicate and talk about it and move forward and understand that everybody's got a different way of looking at it? And that's probably the way I would.
- [12:28]
Jennifer Simkowski
Suggest so what I'm grateful for.
- [12:32]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But you're a very good forgiveness and you teach kids in grade five. Oh, yes.
- [12:40]
Jennifer Simkowski
That's why I said that.
- [12:41]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Go ahead.
- [12:41]
Peter Simkowski
I think we said all of that.
- [12:43]
Jennifer Simkowski
I was gonna say, I feel like we can't rewind that one, though. But I'll have my moment to shine later.
- [12:48]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
No, but since teaching grade five, you have to deal with, like, forgiveness every day. And people probably punch people in the face. You have to teach them how to get away. So how do you Teach it. How do you teach forgiveness? How do you, you know, even teach family dynamics and how to treat other people? Because in a world that a lot is going on, how are you implying that to, you know, people that are still developing, still growing up?
- [13:13]
Jennifer Simkowski
I feel like it's not even just forgiveness you're teaching. You're just teaching them how to be a good person. Like, let's just be a good person. So let's create an environment where you're happy to come to school, you feel safe, you feel heard. No matter what we're learning or what I'm teaching in the curriculum, you're happy to come to school, and you feel like you belong there. And that's my number one thing. Because every single person sitting in that room is different. And I don't stand up there and say, I'm perfect. I don't know everything. We all know I'm not probably the best speller, nor am I sometimes. Or a kid will ask a question, and I say, honestly, I don't know the answer to that. Let's research it together. And then they don't look at me like, you know everything. No, like I'm still learning, too, and so they don't feel bad making mistakes. And I say, you don't have to like, every single person in this room. You're not going to be best friends with every single person, but at the end of the day, you're going to respect them and you're going to be kind. And if that's how this classroom operates, then I'm okay with that.
- [14:07]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And growing up, we always had the family saying of, treat people the way you want to be treated. Because regardless of you have more or less, everybody is imperfect in their own perfect way. So, you know, you do have to treat everyone with the same respect that you want to get back from them. What was like, I remember in elementary school and stuff, it was a lot different back then with teaching and things. And I know a lot you've even mentioned has been changed with, you can't give kids hugs, or you don't. There's no winners in sports and things. Everyone gets a participation ribbon. But I didn't mind the whole. You know, we had spelling tests, and then if we didn't get them right, mom and dad would make us sit there and write the word 10 times over. So I was there for 24 hours writing every single word 10 times over. I think it's 48 or something like that, but it was. It was nice. And I mean, I grew up thinking that dad knew everything, though, because he did have an answer for everything. Do you want to say no? I thought that was a compliment. Honestly, like, I think that a whole, the whole dad thing is like, you always have an answer for everything. And Peter being in, like studying medical sciences and things like that, I thought every single thing I had a question about physically, I was like, okay, Peter will have the answer. And you probably made up something sometimes. Or you were like, google it. And I'm like, true, that's also a good way to go. But does anyone have anything to say about that? What Jen kind of mentioned with that always being right. No, not being kind with I was always right.
- [15:45]
Brian Simkowski
No, I, I think what I'm amazed at is how you guys grow up having Google and everything and, and being able to answer, but you still come back to your parents for. You can, you can find things out on the Internet, whatever you want, but yet you come back to your parents for an answer, which is cool. That's, that's, that's, that's so nice to be a parent. Yeah. We really appreciate it.
- [16:09]
Jennifer Simkowski
You, like when I send you anything that happens to my car, I'm like, dad, this happened. Or my steering wheel wheel shaking. He's like, okay. Like, I'm not. Can't see it. You're six and a half hours away.
- [16:19]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah, normally I don't tell them what happens. I just let them find it out on their own. Like, I did injure my car the other day, but injured injury. I did a little scratchy scratch, but dad's here to help.
- [16:32]
Heather Simkowski
It adds to the other scratch.
- [16:35]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah, I did say. He goes, what happened to the front of your car? I'm like, I have literally no idea. Like, I pulled out of the parking garage, I drove home, didn't hit anything. And I guess it just happened. Jen had my car for a while. Maybe she did a little script scrap two years ago.
- [16:52]
Jennifer Simkowski
Two years ago she had it maybe from back then. We just never saw it yet.
- [16:56]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But because we. Because dad owned dealerships before, I feel like he has a connect some way. So I'm like, oh, it'll be fine, but it'll be fine.
- [17:04]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah. When you have like actual experience in that and like, you know people, it's easier to ask because you can probably direct that to somebody, you know. Yeah. And get it fixed a lot faster.
- [17:14]
Jennifer Simkowski
Guys. Oakley's still wearing her trying to make beliefs collar because they won yesterday because she wore it.
- [17:18]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Well, this won't go out as the game was yesterday. So they won in the past.
- [17:23]
Jennifer Simkowski
All right.
- [17:23]
Peter Simkowski
Well, the one game. Their second, third game.
- [17:29]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
So if they ever don't win, it's because she's not wearing the collar. Now let's get into the family dynamic, because I feel like this will be the funny part, and I want to kind of get into what roles we play. We each play, and I guess even people will kind of get to gauge it with the way we're all speaking. And, I mean, I have to be the one guiding this conversation, so I'm gonna be the one talking a bit more. But I do feel like I do.
- [17:52]
Jennifer Simkowski
I feel like you would do it anyways even if you weren't the host. Yeah, but.
- [17:56]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But let's. Let's kind of gauge the roles, and I don't think it's probably easy to gauge your own role and say, you know, who you are, so let's allow someone to pick on somebody else. It's all fun and games and say, what role you think they play in the family dynamic or in general.
- [18:14]
Peter Simkowski
Okay, I'll do an easy starting one. The parents. So mom would be more of the caring, sympathizing person of the two, even. They're both very caring. And obviously. But when you're going for maybe a more personal thing or like, a broken TV that happened or something like that, you would go to mom first because she. Yeah, she's just not just gonna be more caring. I don't know how to, like, describe that, but caring about it and.
- [18:49]
Heather Simkowski
Yeah, because sometimes I've said I broken that. Dad, don't worry about it. Yeah, I wrecked that car when really I didn't. But I thought, you know what? I'll deflect it on myself.
- [18:59]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah. Yes, exactly. She'll be like, take one for the team. And she puts the kids above herself, which dad does, too, obviously. But she'll just, I don't know, take the blame first.
- [19:11]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And doing all of that, more emotionally responsive. And dad's more like, if you need anything to get done, he will do it in seconds. It's a miracle, really.
- [19:20]
Jennifer Simkowski
Dad looks for. Dad looks for, like, the solution. Like, he looks to solve the problem, whereas mom first will give, like, emotional comfort and then. Then, like, pass off the. The solution to the problem to dad.
- [19:30]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yes. You know, they have a great team dynamic.
- [19:33]
Peter Simkowski
That's a good way to say it works. Yeah.
- [19:36]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Do you guys disagree with that at all?
- [19:38]
Heather Simkowski
No. The. The only thing I'd say is I think sometimes I plan a little bit more, and then I make Brian execute some of that. You know, this is what we're gonna do you call all those people? So I don't know. I don't know if I've figured it out, but it works.
- [19:57]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah. I just want. I wanted to say mom so someone else can do Dad, I guess, and someone else can do some.
- [20:03]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Then how about since Jen, you started, how about you finalize Dad's role in.
- [20:08]
Jennifer Simkowski
The family, role in the team? I feel like Peter's right. Like, mom plans. She's really good at planning and she has everything down to a T, which I quite like. But Dad's very good at doing. Like, dad gets things done. He does things. He's always ready to go. And something you're really good at is, like, being social. Like, you're just always good at talking to people or even helping us, like, talk to people or incorporate people in our lives. And I think you're probably, like, I would say the leader. That sounds like. Yeah, like, you just like. But like, by example, like, you just lead. And I feel like that's. I don't know if that's your role, but if we're going to, like, classify a role, I feel like you would be the leader by doing.
- [20:52]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
I agree.
- [20:53]
Peter Simkowski
And I. I'll say too, like dad in terms, he's like, very compassionate, too. But, like, in doing, like, I'll come back and my car will be filled with gas when I go to take it home. And I'm like, I noticed it on the way home. Like, oh, my God. Like, I know my dad filled that up, like, so nice. But you don't, like, even vocalize it. Sometimes you just do it and then we notice it and then we're like, oh, my God, like, so nice. So it's very amazingly compassionate and caring and everything. But you show it in, like, ways of doing.
- [21:19]
Jennifer Simkowski
Yeah, but I like what you said about the car. I will go back in Ottawa and I'm like, I have to drive home or I have to go fill my car. And I'm like, I really wish I was at home because my dad will just, like, get me gas sometimes. And it's the simplest thing, but it's the nicest thing in the world. Like, you know, you can do that for yourself. I'm like, yeah, it's just. It's not the same feeling. Like, it's not saying he does it for mom, too. And I think it's just, like, those little acts of kindness that, like, just take something off your plate. Like, to me, that's how I feel so loved. And I'm like, you don't notice until you don't have it.
- [21:46]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
It's things that you don't ask for, that he knows you need, and it's things that we didn't even know we needed at the time, but it's such a thing that we are grateful for. So even if we don't say it every time, because maybe we're on the road and we're like, yes, dad did it, but we are appreciative of that and everything. I mean, because we just both gave the parents. We do probably want to preface that. We both, like, all of us are taking everything you guys do. And I can guarantee when we have kids, Jen might be a little quicker to do this since she wants one, like, tomorrow. But. But I honestly do think that we will be doing everything that you guys have done for us, for our children, too. And we would never know even about any of these things if you guys didn't love us and care for us in that way.
- [22:31]
Brian Simkowski
Well, we do. And. And we do. But you know, that comes from parenting, because that's what my mom and dad did. Your mom's mom is the most caring person in the world, and she is loving and kind. Oh, yeah. Grandma Betty's the just an unbelievable person. And Ernie's a loving person person, too. Really cares about it. So that's not something that happens. That's something that's taught and that's taught by our parents to us, and we're hopefully teaching it to you. And hopefully that goes down to our grandkids. Well, it will come from the. To our grandkids from. From us for sure, because we can't wait for those. But. And then I want to go back and. And talk about the kids a little bit and saying that, you know, you said very social. You guys are way more social than I ever was or mom and I ever were. You guys are great in front of people. I can't believe how good you are in social situations. Our friends comment on that all the time, going, I just had such a lovely conversation with your daughter, your son. Oh, my God, he's just such a good person. Oh, it's. And that's a proud papa moment. That's a proud mom moment. And then to touch on, Heather does organize everything, like, everything. And I'm just the executor. I get my walking papers and I go, okay, you go out and do this.
- [23:51]
Heather Simkowski
So I might have said, make sure you fill the kids gas tanks up before. No. But I have to say, we are not perfect parents by any means. I mean, we have learned just like you Guys are learning growing up too. But I hope that when we see something we should change. We really try to modify our behavior, do something. But we still are never going to be perfect at that role and. But it's just fun to see you guys being three different people, you know, being able to kind of work together solving things. I know you've got your own secret group chats that were not invited in, but that's fine. I think that's really cool because hey.
- [24:34]
Jennifer Simkowski
You two have one too. With Pierre and Maddie, me and Sarah Busado.
- [24:38]
Heather Simkowski
True enough.
- [24:38]
Peter Simkowski
True.
- [24:39]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
I didn't even know this.
- [24:40]
Peter Simkowski
True, true.
- [24:41]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Is this the wordle?
- [24:41]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, it's Wordle though.
- [24:43]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Keep that one. I don't want anything to do. We talked about. Yeah, we talked about the whole spelling thing. I am not perfect at that. Let me tell you that.
- [24:50]
Peter Simkowski
That's why you probably should do.
- [24:51]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
That's what. No, I have never even looked at the app. I don't even know what the app looks like and I will never invest in that thing ever.
- [24:58]
Peter Simkowski
Fair.
- [24:59]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But that's okay. That's why we are all different.
- [25:02]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah.
- [25:02]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And it is like I haven't even thought of the fact that we are all such different people and like such different jobs. I could never in my life be a five year or grade five teacher. Never in my life. I would be so frustrated at those kids. I'd be have anxiety through the ringer. I would. I don't even know. That just could not happen. And I'm so grateful that you are doing that. But it's like honorable and I don't even understand how medicine works or how anything science related. And then you going into business, like that's admirable too. Like it's things that I couldn't do. And I just hope and I know that we all try so hard in what we do do. We don't just coast ever. But it is pretty cool to even think of it from that perspective because I never have. I've never thought of it in a sense. I just think, oh yeah, we're all, you know, we got our head on. Right. We're all nice people. We're good people and we try hard and what we're doing. No, but we've tried hard in what we wanted to do and what we want to execute. We all follow our dreams and not a lot of people do that.
- [26:04]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I think like that even early on. Especially in sports too. It's like give it a hundred percent with whatever you do. And I heard that from my parents and then coaches Too and everything. And yeah, taking that into life or anything is like a very right thing to do because it's true. And finding something you love to do, too.
- [26:20]
Brian Simkowski
But yeah, now I'm just thinking back, was the whole gas conversation because you guys are going to be driving back, is that the reason you put it out there?
- [26:29]
Peter Simkowski
Good catch.
- [26:30]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah, mine is definitely empty right now, but.
- [26:35]
Peter Simkowski
And I think too, though, going back to the being parents, good parents and stuff, I don't think anybody being a parent is like, knows what it's going to be like to be a parent. You see it, but you don't. You don't know. But I think the best thing that you can tell if you're good or not is just like dad said about friends coming up to you and saying how nice your kids are. That's one. Seeing your kids as friends is another thing, which is having your friends come here, having our friends come here wanting to see you guys and hang out with our family. There's like certain things you can rank or check off if it was a success. And I think you guys know that it was for sure.
- [27:11]
Jennifer Simkowski
A lot of our friends really enjoy seeing you two. Like, you two are in their minds, like a pivotal point of their growing up too. Right? Like, you guys were parents to them and they are so comfortable. And I can't speak for everyone's friends, but I know mine are so comfortable. Like, they'll see dad. I'm like, I just saw your dad and we just chatted about this. Or mom, I just saw your mom here and we did this. Like, they would hang out with you guys without me. And I think that speaks volumes to the kind of people you guys are too.
- [27:38]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
So funny. Because the only thing that came to my head when dad said, oh, people compliment you on how, you know, how social you are. I did two hour conversation with our priest last weekend. Not last weekend, two weekends ago. But he did say I. Yeah, he.
- [27:53]
Heather Simkowski
You got some good comments on, like, your generation. So I think he's going to connect back with you.
- [27:59]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah, we were, we were talking about how podcasting is actually very similar to being a priest. There are many differences, but there are some similarities and those some we did find. So who knows, maybe we'll have a podcaster and a priest in the next episode.
- [28:18]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I think you can relate something to something at some point on any level.
- [28:21]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But listen, if you don't know what to talk about with anyone, relate your two drops together and see where you can intermingle what you know. That's a Great way of doing it. And I was left alone with the priest and I started doing that.
- [28:35]
Peter Simkowski
Being a social media influencer is very similar to being a priest.
- [28:39]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
It was just a hilarious conversation and I think we both benefited from it. I also repented my sins. So I'm good to go now. I'm ready. Okay, let's. Let's circle back to roles. Who wants to do who for the kids or the parents could do the kids.
- [28:57]
Brian Simkowski
So we can do the kids. Jennifer is generally the peacemaker. The child that used to be on time. Solid, rock solid. You could always depend on her. Has now become the late person, but still the peacemaker in everything. Everything she does is. It's just an easy going, friendly, fun person. That Sporty that Peter's friends like that Sarah's friends love, that everybody kind of.
- [29:27]
Heather Simkowski
Yeah. And I think Jen would put herself behind like not first. So she would do stuff for other people all the time. And maybe that's where similar to maybe what I would do a few times.
- [29:41]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Give an example.
- [29:43]
Heather Simkowski
Like she would. If Peter's friends need a ride, she would be the first one from our house to drive all the way, all them downtown and just come back here. And she'd wait for them saying, if you need a ride home, I'll be here to pick you up. Just call me. So, you know, not thinking about what she wanted to do that night, she just kind of said, whatever you boys need, I'm here for you.
- [30:07]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But if she's asleep, she will not wake up. I was locked outside after sneaking out one time and my parents weren't home and she was the only one. And she goes, I will be up, don't worry. And I go, okay, I'm throwing rocks at your door, at your thing, which is like three stories up. I'm trying to throw rocks. And she's dead asleep. So I slept in the shed and then I couldn't sleep any longer in the shed. So I called my aunt Carol who's I think ratted me out a little bit.
- [30:31]
Heather Simkowski
Yeah, I. We did find out about it.
- [30:34]
Jennifer Simkowski
Fire alarms, my alarm. Like, yeah, when I'm asleep, I am sleep.
- [30:38]
Heather Simkowski
Yeah, she is dead to the world.
- [30:40]
Brian Simkowski
And Peter is. Peter's the guy that everybody likes to hang out with. Like from my friends to Jen's friend, everybody loves Peter. He's a fun loving, easygoing guy that just can meld in with anybody. And you know, you say I always have an answer. Peter's. Peter's actually like, he's smarter and better than I am at all those Things well.
- [31:05]
Heather Simkowski
And I think Peter. Sorry for interrupting. I think Peter's a really good listener. Like, he has. He's listening to you, looking at you and putting. Whereas a lot of people aren't like that. So when someone walks away from you, they go, oh, my gosh. He was actually listening to me. And I felt important. And I. You know, we hear that a lot where people go, he is such a great kid. And I think it's your listening skills and just relating back to that person and making them feel like they are important. It doesn't matter who they are, but they are just as important as you are.
- [31:39]
Brian Simkowski
And then Sarah. Sarah's just a great person. Wrong, but strong is her motto. But she puts 100% effort into everything she does, which, as a parent, you're proud of. You're just so proud of what she's done. She's the kid that went to New York and spent two years there and figured it out and was working hard there and loved it, but figured out in her life she wanted to be back in Toronto, and it's okay. And that's okay. So smart, dynamic, fun. Everybody likes being around Sarah, so it's.
- [32:14]
Heather Simkowski
And I'd also say you're very resilient. Like, you knew from a very young age you wanted to do fashion, and it didn't matter what people said to you, you just kept at it. And you were actually having issues in school, too, with. And I always go back, I think sometimes people are jealous of other people if they. If they know what they want and they're confident and, you know, that was a hard time for you. But, you know, you took all that learning and all that, you know, treatment from other people, and you became such a compassionate person. You don't want anybody to be bullied ever, because you know what that's like. So I love that you kind of took some of your hard times and darker times and made them who you are today to help other people and be resilient. And not everybody can overcome that. And, you know, I think we're really proud of that and that you tell it.
- [33:04]
Brian Simkowski
We're proud parents.
- [33:05]
Heather Simkowski
And I think also maybe your family supporting you, too, has made you feel, yeah, I can do this. I can go to New York. I can follow my dreams. I have you. You know, I hope you've always felt you've had us behind you for all of that. And I. I know I got a few phone calls super early in the morning, so I do know that sometimes, you know, we're behind you.
- [33:25]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
But even with that being said, like, this is that exact answer right there. And is the reason why I started podcasting because I went through so much emotionally. I'm so grateful that I didn't, you know, like, I didn't have to worry too much about some other things, but I was worried about, you know, how I was treated, who was treating me in certain ways, or getting screwed over a lot of the times when I was growing up. And I swear to God, that is the reason why I started being okay with being transparent and vulnerable on social media. And that is what people need. Like, I wish I had someone talking about their anxiety and being bullied and getting broken up with or getting cheated on and things, because I didn't have that growing up. I would always follow these, you know, bloggers, Instagrammers and things in fashion and social media. But it was all perfect lives, and they weren't. And that's why I just wanted to preface in the beginning, we're not perfect. I'm not perfect. I struggle with some things. I have struggled with some things. Everybody on this couch has done that. The dogs aren't always happy, but it is very. If you can get over some things, and it might take time. Time is your biggest healer. But if you can do something good with a bad situation, then that speaks volumes about who you are. And I'm so happy that I am here on this couch today in a happy state and able to. And able to talk about it.
- [34:55]
Heather Simkowski
And I just want to say I don't want anybody to ever feel that you're alone. Like, you always have somebody in your back, you know, watching out for you. And if not, we're all here for you, too.
- [35:06]
Jennifer Simkowski
Yeah, my dog is highly needy.
- [35:09]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I was just going to add to that and say, yeah, I'm very proud of you, Sarah, for, I think, like we all said, you went through a lot as a kid. And resilient was a great, great word that you said about Sarah, too. And you took everything that happened to you and then, like, turned it even through life, too, and turned it into, like, doing something that's you. Like, fully about you going full time, you know, out of the fashion job that you had. And it's all about you. Like, you took everything, your fashion experience, your bullying experience, your experience with relationships, what you love to do on social media, and you made it into, like, yourself, which is very cool. Very cool. And I know that you were talking about your dreams of, like, wanting to do a business and everything, but you did it by just being you, which is really cool. And that's the best way to do it, honestly, is just taking what you love and doing it from that. So very proud of you. Yeah.
- [36:05]
Jennifer Simkowski
Well, you said, like, you could never teach grade five, and, like, that's something I'm good at because I have, like, the patience. And I think they're funny. Right. Like, I think that they're great. But on the other side, like, I could never do what you do. Like, the confidence you allude and what it takes to put yourself out there and be that vulnerable in front of that many people in just the world is something that's admirable. Like, I. I couldn't do it myself, but I think it is the most incredible thing that you do.
- [36:31]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And honestly, like, yes, I do believe that, you know, you. We have special talents that some other people don't have, whether that's patience, whether that is a business or, like, being so socially good and listening and all that stuff to people, or whether that is being resilient in situations. I do think that if you're consistently working on something, like, I think if anyone on this couch was like, no, I want to start a podcast, and I'm gonna work on it every single day. We have that determination because we are a very stubborn. Yes.
- [37:04]
Heather Simkowski
But also type A personality.
- [37:06]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah. That. I think that if. If we switched today or we for a day. What's that movie called where you switch bodies with somebody else? Freaky Friday. If we Freaky Friday today with any one of us, I think we could pull it off. Yeah.
- [37:19]
Brian Simkowski
You know what I think? I think one of the things you're saying is talking about we don't have the perfect life, but we're living the best lives we can.
- [37:28]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Absolutely.
- [37:29]
Brian Simkowski
Which is great. And everybody's kind of settled into their best life, which I'm. As parents, we're extremely happy about. You know, like, that's what you want your kids. You just want your kids to be happy, and that's.
- [37:42]
Heather Simkowski
And kind. I think. I think that kindness, like I heard about it, is we always come back and we see people we haven't seen forever, and it's. You know, you have to be kind to everybody. And, I mean, sometimes those people aren't gonna be kind to you, but, you know, you kind of figure it out. But that. I think that's really important.
- [38:02]
Jennifer Simkowski
It's that whole idea of, like, we talked about perspectives, and everybody sees the world from a different perspective, and you're trying to empathize with how somebody else saw the same situation because they react to that situation. The way they saw it, and your perspective is different, so the way you reacted is different. And at the end of the day, everybody's just doing their best to be happy in whatever way they feel. That looks like. So I feel like for all of us, it looks so different in all of our lives, but we're all doing what we feel we love to do and what's going to bring us the most happiness. And I think the best thing about our family is we don't judge each other for any of those decisions. We're the first ones to be there and support. Like, if I'm ever feeling lonely, like, the first people I feel I always have in my corner are you guys. No matter where in the world I am, I'm like, I always know I have them.
- [38:55]
Peter Simkowski
Go ahead. I was just gonna say, too, like, it's been very nice with having parents that are pushing you to do what you want to do instead of forcing you to go into something. Because I know, like, friends of mine when I was in medical science, like, they were really pushing them to become doctors and things, but I knew my parents, at the end of the day, would always tell me as a kid, do what you love and figure out what you want to do, and we'll support you fully with that. So it's been a nice, like, thing to have on behind you, knowing that whatever you pick, you'll be supported, Whereas I think some other people don't have that. That privilege.
- [39:28]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And I know we were talking about perspectives, but that's what I want people to see. Like, yes, we are talking about some great things that are families. And I think it's a amazing habit to keep doing this and saying what you're grateful for about each other. And on birthdays, we now talk about why, you know, like, what is your favorite part about this person? Or what do you most love about this person? And things like that, and just going around so that someone feels so appreciative. And even right now, I'm sure some of us didn't know how we felt about a certain thing that we all mentioned about each other. But it comes down to it again, you might not agree with the way we do something or say something or an advice that we give each other in our family dynamic. You could see it from a totally different perspective now, watching this and hearing what we have to say. You could agree with that or you could not. And you're thinking just the fact of seeing it and hearing it from somebody else's shoes and somebody else's perspective is so important. That's why podcasts in general are great, to be able to hear it. You don't have to take someone's advice. You don't have to follow what they're saying. And you can honestly be like, oh, that just made me think, because I don't agree with that, but it made me think about it in a different way. And that's why I'm doing this. That's why I said it in a different podcast. I just want you to know that you have my experience that you can fall back on and just think about it. And I probably didn't handle it the right way. I'll tell you how I handled it, tell you how I wish I handled it. And you can decide how you want to handle yours from there on out.
- [40:56]
Jennifer Simkowski
Life, like, everybody is imperfect. Like, people are just, you're never going to be perfect as much as you try. And maybe you want to be. And I fall into that sometimes. Maybe I over we all have exert myself into something because I want it to be perfect, but it's not going to be. And life is never going to be perfect. But that kind of is where you find the vulnerability and the true happiness. Like when you're just you and it doesn't really matter the outcome. You're just living for the moment. I feel like that's when you get some of the best moments. And I find that a lot with us at the table just telling stories, like, everybody's just, there's no walls up, your guards are just so down that it's just something that you feel like you're just you. You don't have to be any version of you. You're just you.
- [41:34]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And you know how exhausting it is to be like completely. And I want to use my hands for this one, like on all the time. Like, you know, when you step out of your house and you're going on an interview or you're going to something, you need to be like, on in that conversation, in that whatever. And that's how I felt in New York a lot of the time, because I didn't have my family and my close friends that I grew up with there. But I felt like I always had to look good, feel good, have worked out, woke up at a certain time and all this and beyond. And I'm like, I'm sick and tired of putting out that I love my life right now. And then it just makes you realize nobody's perfect and people relate to you more. If you show your vulnerable side, if you show what you're struggling with why you're not perfect. Do you. Are you breaking out that day? Because you know how many other people in this entire world are breaking out that day, too? And they'd feel better about seeing a video of you saying that. So many. You know what I mean? And that's just the beauty of being authentic and being able to be vulnerable of yourself and perspectives.
- [42:34]
Heather Simkowski
And just when you guys were talking, one thing that came to mind was when you were younger, around the table, we'd always ask around the dinner table what was good about your day and what was not good about your day. And I think that kind of helped us talk about things. I mean, it doesn't all have to be good. So what was bad? And maybe it was someone that wasn't nice to you at school, or you were, you know, not doing well in some grades, but that kind of, I hope, helped figure some of this out and living your best day. But it's not always gonna be good days. There are gonna be bad days. But it's good to talk about it.
- [43:12]
Peter Simkowski
That actually was a very nice thing you guys did. And I even do that with Maddy. I'm trying to incorporate that in our dinners and spend actual family time without phone and just sit down with each other, whether it's breakfast or dinner or whenever we can be together when she's not at work. But it's nice to spend a true quality time and then actually talk about, you know, how you're doing and how everything is. And. Yeah, like that. That was a very nice thing to teach as a kid because I'm trying to keep that going and just.
- [43:40]
Heather Simkowski
We want to have a plug in for Maddie, Peter's girlfriend. We love her.
- [43:46]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Love her.
- [43:46]
Peter Simkowski
Yes, we do.
- [43:50]
Jennifer Simkowski
We want to keep her.
- [43:51]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
She's allowed. She's allowed to stay.
- [43:53]
Jennifer Simkowski
So was it from yourself or.
- [43:56]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
No, it was from one of dad's friends. And I will take that and run with it. So thank you so much for that.
- [44:02]
Heather Simkowski
And I think I'm trying to do things that are for myself, putting myself first and that I think. I don't know if that's helpful, but it's just making me do something that I, you know, even if it's exercise or whatever, but it's important that I find time to do something for myself and not just for everybody else all the time.
- [44:23]
Jennifer Simkowski
You are one of the biggest givers. Like, you like to make sure everybody else is okay. And sometimes by doing that, you forget about you. And I think it's. Until you feel not burnt out. But, like, stressed or just, like, overwhelmed that you remember, oh, I didn't work out today, or I didn't do that, and that makes me feel better. So, like, I'm really proud of you because I think for that you're right. Like, the past little while, like, you've been a lot better at filling your own cup, and you still feel everybody else's. Like, you are the first person to solve a problem for any of us. And then you. But now you realize how important it is that you're filled with, like, pickleball or your Pilates. And, like, it's the things that. Yeah. And I think by watching you do that, I think I kind of resonated with it a little bit more. And I was like, you know what? You do need those moments. Like, you can work out at home and you still feel good, but there's a difference in going out and doing a social workout with your friends, or pickleball. Or. Now I'm back to hockey and I'm like, okay, I feel way better that day and the next day.
- [45:25]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I guess you only have so much gas in the tank, actually, is a funny thing to say, but it's true. You only have so much energy in your day. And like, they always say, too, on flights, like, put your gas mask on first because you can only help people out, too. If you're feeling good about yourself and you're helping yourself and you're doing well for yourself, then you can kind of like, have that extra time to give back to people. And if you don't have that and you're given all your bandwidth out to everyone instead of yourself, and you'll end up, you know, feeling a little, you know, not happy about yourself, not happy with where you are, and have, like, animosity and stuff like that, which is not a good thing. So I think that's great that you're doing that. I kind of seen that. And it's true, though. Like, you need to make yourself happy first. Then you can project that and do other things for other people.
- [46:16]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And it's just like when people say the whole, like, you work a nine to five, or you. You, like, all day, you're doing things for us and for other people. But you can think of it in the whole saying of, like, you work nine to five for somebody else, you need to do something for yourself at the end of the day or at the beginning of the day or both. And what's the 888 rule?
- [46:36]
Jennifer Simkowski
You taught us that, didn't you? The 888.
- [46:39]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
No. Isn't like the three things.
- [46:40]
Peter Simkowski
No. Yeah. So what I do about my day. Do you want me to say that? Yeah. So every single day I have a list of things that I need to do for myself. And I make sure though that that list that I have to complete is both business related and also personal. So it doesn't. It's not completed and my day's not checked off until I actually do personal things for myself. So I have two personal things I do every single day or three usually. But I also have three business things that I need to do. And it just keeps yourself in check of like making sure you're working on yourself. But at the same time you're working for my company. But also if you have a job, it's the same thing. And for myself it would be things like I need to work out legs today, I have to work out legs. And you pre plan your list at the start of the day or the night before. So that one, you have the time in the morning to start executing on that, but you also can't. Based on how you wake up and what you see on your phone, you would think maybe, oh, I have this many people messaging me here or whatever, I can't do these things that I thought, no, you have to do it before that happens so that you have to stick to what you had because you know that's the true thing that's gonna benefit you the next day.
- [47:51]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And I think that's so healthy. And that's the only way to grow is putting down every single thing that you need to get done for yourself, for other people, for your mentally, physically, whatever that may be. But then you're already planning backwards as to, okay, no, I thought I could sleep in today, but. But actually I want to do abcd. So I'm gonna wake up this early so that I can have time for all that.
- [48:12]
Peter Simkowski
Exactly.
- [48:12]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
And you're setting yourself up for success at the end of the day.
- [48:15]
Heather Simkowski
Yeah, I find that's helpful for me. I do survive on a lot of lists, agenda calendars and post it notes. But it does help me and I prepare the night before. Like I've got even the coffee on to be set for the morning and then it just helps with my day and being able to integrate something for myself and getting a lot done.
- [48:36]
Jennifer Simkowski
I'm a big fan of day old coffee because it's already there and ready for me in the fridge. Some people think that's gross. Whatever. Also, Peter, really proud of you there. You were about to swear and Then you probably looked at mom's face and then he goes, oh. And he was probably.
- [48:48]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Anything's allowed. I know you. They don't want to hear it, but anything's allowed on this podcast. So if you one slips, you're fine.
- [48:53]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, I think I wasn't worried about the podcast. It's more Mom.
- [48:56]
Jennifer Simkowski
Yeah, he looked at mom's face and he's like, oh, shoot, now people swear more.
- [49:00]
Heather Simkowski
So. So it's. I think it's more acceptable, but it.
- [49:03]
Jennifer Simkowski
No, no, no, I doesn't.
- [49:04]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
It just feels so good sometimes, you.
- [49:06]
Jennifer Simkowski
Know, I. I try to keep it out of my vocabulary.
- [49:08]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Well, cuz you're teaching grade fives.
- [49:09]
Jennifer Simkowski
Well. Yeah. And I don't want to slip. I don't want to slip it up. Yeah. Oh, okay.
- [49:14]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Okay. Now, is there anyone, Anyone want to add any last things before we wrap her up? This won't be the last you see of them, but this is the last for now.
- [49:21]
Jennifer Simkowski
If you want more, we're always here.
- [49:23]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah, you let us.
- [49:24]
Jennifer Simkowski
But if you want more, we're always here. Call me. Beat me.
- [49:27]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Anyone going once.
- [49:29]
Peter Simkowski
I'll just say that I'm very, very happy with the family that we have. And you can't pick your family. You're born into it, obviously, but you can. You can choose your friends and who you want to spend your time with. And I would want to spend my time with my family over anyone else in the world.
- [49:46]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
We are each other's friends too.
- [49:47]
Jennifer Simkowski
We are lucky in the sense. We are lucky in the sense that, like, we. We don't. We didn't choose our family, but we choose our family now. Like, we choose to always get together. And I think for the three of us, we're on the same page. It's like our happiest times. Like, what we want to do most is come back home and spend time as a family.
- [50:06]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Yeah. Like, I wanted to take this podcast first, but this was the only time we had to do it. So I wanted to do it as the first podcast that I took, but we squeezed it in and I think we should do a podcast of like, I'm gonna give you guys to be the leaders and create the topic and see, because that could be fun too.
- [50:22]
Jennifer Simkowski
I'll lead one.
- [50:23]
Peter Simkowski
Yeah, you can get like a Get to Know Sarah from the perspective of her family.
- [50:27]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
True.
- [50:28]
Jennifer Simkowski
Watch us play. Watch us play some board games, some family food.
- [50:31]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Not all of us like that.
- [50:33]
Peter Simkowski
Watch dad drink Pink Whitney for a night.
- [50:36]
Jennifer Simkowski
No, it's a Pillsbury Doughboy.
- [50:39]
Sarah Lauren Simkowski
Oh, we have some very funny stories that we could tell, but that would take way too long. That's for another day. But thank you guys so much. I love all of you and I love everyone watching. Please do subscribe. Subscribe and you will get to see more of me and probably a lot more of them, too. That could be unfortunately, or that could be fortunately. So we'll see how that goes. But I love you guys, and I will see you next Thursday.