Why You Should NEVER Split The Bill With A Man

Summary

Tall Blonde Podcast Episode Summary: "Why You Should NEVER Split The Bill With A Man"

Podcast Information

• Title: Tall Blonde
• Host: Sarah Lauren
• Description: Sharing the hard truths on dating, city life, and leveling up to 'it girl' status. Unfiltered stories, straight talk, and lessons learned—so you don’t have to.
• Presented by: MBHTV
• Episode: Why You Should NEVER Split The Bill With A Man
• Release Date: January 10, 2025

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Introduction to the Episode

In this engaging episode of Tall Blonde, host Sarah Lauren delves into the nuanced dynamics of dating, particularly focusing on the contentious topic of splitting the bill with men. The conversation is candid, humorous, and filled with relatable anecdotes, offering listeners both entertainment and valuable insights into modern dating etiquette.

Main Topic: Never Splitting the Bill with a Man

Hosts' Perspectives and Experiences

From the very outset, the hosts tackle the idea that offering to split the bill with a man can be a significant turn-off. Early in the episode, one host emphatically states, “A guy wants to split the bill with you. It’s just like the biggest ick” (00:00, 34:25). This sentiment sets the tone for the discussion, emphasizing the traditional expectation that men should take the lead, especially financially, when dating.

Supporting Arguments Against Splitting

The hosts argue that insisting on splitting the bill can undermine the perceived value and effort in the relationship. They highlight that when a man offers to pay, it’s a gesture of care and interest, whereas splitting the bill might signal a lack of commitment or interest. Sarah Lauren reinforces this by saying, “If a guy wants to split the bill with you, it’s just like an ick” (34:08, 34:25).

Additionally, they discuss how traditional gender roles still play a significant role in dating dynamics. By not splitting the bill, men demonstrate initiative and chivalry, qualities that are highly valued by many women. This approach fosters a sense of appreciation and intrigue, making the interaction more memorable and meaningful.

Personal Anecdotes and Stories

The "No Pants On" Door Incident

A humorous and slightly embarrassing story is recounted where one host opens the door with no pants on, only to discover a group of unexpected guests at their party (06:03). This incident not only provides comic relief but also underscores the unpredictability of social interactions, especially when alcohol is involved.

Apartment Design from a Female Perspective

The hosts explore how apartment designs often overlook the specific needs of women. They brainstorm innovative solutions such as sliding trays with dedicated shelves for various personal items like makeup and hair tools (14:09 - 15:00). This discussion highlights the importance of considering female perspectives in everyday living spaces, advocating for more thoughtful and functional design elements.

Life as Single and Leveling Up

Embracing Single Life

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to celebrating singlehood. The hosts discuss how being single allows for personal growth, self-improvement, and the freedom to pursue individual passions without the constraints of a relationship. One host shares, “Dating when you’re lonely is like grocery shopping when you’re hungover or hungry. You pick out things you don’t need” (28:08 - 28:27), emphasizing the importance of entering relationships for the right reasons rather than out of loneliness.

Life Coaching Insights

Integrating life coaching principles, the hosts encourage listeners to focus on self-worth and personal value. They stress the importance of not devaluing oneself by being overly available or overly eager in interactions, advising a balanced approach to communication and relationship-building.

Listener Questions: Dating Communication Strategies

Handling Texting and Replies

The hosts address listener questions about managing texting dynamics in dating. They advise against excessive texting and suggest creating a sense of mystery by not always being immediately available. Sarah Lauren recommends, “Disappear for a day. Be mysterious and make him wonder what you’re doing and where you are” (31:08 - 31:54). This strategy aims to maintain one's value and prevent the other party from taking the relationship for granted.

Green Flags in Dating

Identifying Positive Traits

Transitioning from red flags, the hosts discuss green flags to look for in potential partners. Key indicators include:

• Initiative in Planning Dates: A partner who proactively arranges dates shows genuine interest. For instance, “When the first conversation is to plan to see you in person and take you out, I think that’s a green flag” (33:28 - 33:45).

• Consistency and Effort: Regular communication and consistent effort in the relationship signify reliability and care. Sarah notes, “Is he calling you if he didn’t text you? Is he trying to keep planning another time to see you?” (34:56 - 35:03).

• Chivalrous Behavior: Simple gestures like opening doors, pulling out chairs, or offering the last bite of food are seen as signs of a considerate partner.

• Having Siblings: Interestingly, both hosts highlight that men who grew up with sisters tend to exhibit more considerate and respectful behavior towards women, viewing it as a green flag (35:40 - 37:22).

Importance of Family Dynamics

They emphasize that men with sisters often develop a better understanding and respect for women, influenced by familial relationships. This dynamic is portrayed as crucial for fostering healthy and respectful romantic relationships.

Conclusion and Reflections

Appreciation of Current Life

As the episode wraps up, the hosts reflect on their current lives, expressing gratitude and appreciation for the journey that brought them to where they are. They discuss how past challenges have led to personal growth and a more fulfilling single life, reinforcing the episode’s central message of self-worth and independence.

Encouragement to Listeners

The hosts encourage listeners to embrace their single status, focus on self-improvement, and maintain high standards in their dating lives. They affirm that valuing oneself and setting clear boundaries leads to healthier and more rewarding relationships.

Notable Quotes

• On Splitting the Bill: “A guy wants to split the bill with you. It’s just like the biggest ick” (00:00, 34:25).
• On Dating Out of Loneliness: “Dating when you’re lonely is like grocery shopping when you’re hungover or hungry. You pick out things you don’t need” (28:08 - 28:27).
• On Communication Strategies: “Disappear for a day. Be mysterious and make him wonder what you’re doing and where you are” (31:08 - 31:54).
• On Green Flags: “When the first conversation is to plan to see you in person and take you out, I think that’s a green flag” (33:28 - 33:45).

Final Thoughts

This episode of Tall Blonde offers a blend of humor, personal stories, and practical advice tailored to modern women navigating the dating scene. By challenging conventional norms like splitting the bill and emphasizing the importance of self-worth and meaningful connections, Sarah Lauren and her co-host provide invaluable insights for listeners aiming to elevate their dating experiences and personal lives.

Transcript

[A]

A guy wants to split the bill with you. It's just like the biggest ick.

[B]

Nowadays, guys really think they know how we should react as women. I open the door and no pants on. So quickly I close the door a little bit. It's a party. There is random people that I have never met before in my life. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to Tall Blonde. Hello, everybody, and welcome back to Tall Blonde. This is Girl Chats today. This is none other than a blonde Girl Chats. And I would have it no other way. I'm a little hungover today. You might hear it in my voice. That is totally fine, but. Amy, get the frick over here. Okay, so you've obviously seen Amy before in numerous podcasts and you will be seeing her again. But I don't know how many of you is actually looking at this podcast. But we are wearing a pajama set from Asta, so if you can see us, you're gonna probably want it. So you can find [e-mail] Perfect. All right. Now, how are you? How. How are we?

[A]

I'm good. I'm feeling a little brain fog today.

[B]

Same.

[A]

But I'm gonna do my best.

[B]

I. It took me three times to do this intro and it's never taken me three times to do this intro.

[A]

Yeah, you usually. You're a one take wonder.

[B]

One take wonder. And this will. This is a one take. But my editors probably are going to kill me for this one. But it's totally fine.

[A]

It's going to be candid. It's going to be great to be candid.

[B]

It's going to be great. We are on day three of drinking, which is totally fine. I did have a little like. Okay, we need to talk about this because when you're single, you go out more, right? Literally, naturally. And we need to learn how to not feel guilty about it.

[A]

I don't feel guilty. I love it.

[B]

Okay. I'm so proud of you and I think that is amazing that you feel no guilt.

[A]

Why do I. I don't know.

[B]

Maybe it's because I made nachos at 2am last night. Like, full on nachos.

[A]

Yeah. That wouldn't have happened on a regular night.

[B]

Actually, it might have.

[A]

Probably.

[B]

Maybe I was mixing up. I was shredding the parmesan. Okay.

[A]

No. You've never seen nachos like that in your life.

[B]

I've never used the stove in my life and I used it yesterday at 2:00am O. Oven.

[A]

Oven.

[B]

I keep calling it the stove. What the hell? Why do I keep calling the stove.

[A]

I don't know. What's the difference anyways?

[B]

I don't know. Okay, let's catch up, though, because it's been a little while. I don't know when our last podcast was.

[A]

A while ago. A couple weeks.

[B]

Yeah, it's. We haven't even watched it, so we don't even know what you guys are going to be seeing.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But we normally take these at Nice at night, and it's kind of nice that we are doing it during the day, like this morning. Oh, my God. You know when you're so hungover and you're in a rush. Honestly, it's probably better that we had to do this while hungover because. Because we can't even. We couldn't even. We don't even know. We. I can't even speak. That's how it is.

[A]

That's how I feel, too. I'm non verbal today. It's not. It's not happening.

[B]

We were doing our makeup, and I felt like it was like I was on a game show and it was like, for time, like, I was going. I was doing two things at once. I was opening the foundation as I was blending in the primer, and I sprayed my face so many times with your setting spray. I think you're out.

[A]

Was like, whoa, that was full coming into this. I think it's empty now.

[B]

You're like, I wish. I also. Can we talk about one more thing? Hairspray is so cheap, and it comes in such a large bottle that you can buy. And makeup products like foundation and setting spray are in this tiny little thing, and you need it every single day. I don't hair. No one wants to have to use hairspray. Okay. No one wants to. It's not a good feeling. It's a crunch. And we don't need. We don't want that crunch.

[A]

We don't want the crunch.

[B]

It's like your last resort is hairspra spray. My first resort is primer. Why does the hairspray have those massive. They offer, like, liter bottles.

[A]

I think they know you value the setting spray more, so they're. They're playing hard to get.

[B]

So it's a marketing tactic.

[A]

It must be.

[B]

So it's like, we know you're gonna need this.

[A]

We know you'll be back for more in three weeks.

[B]

Me?

[A]

Especially at the rate you're going at me a week.

[B]

Are you seeing anyone? Sorry, I just jumped in.

[A]

Yeah, let's dive right in. I am seeing people. That sounds bad.

[B]

Explain what seeing people means.

[A]

Like, I'M talking to a few people. Not closed off to anyone, but keeping my options open.

[B]

I think that's the best way to be.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

No obligations to anyone. Even though some people probably think, like nowadays guys really think they know how we should react as women. Like I feel like dependent on the guy because I am also not seeing a particular someone.

[A]

There's no exclusivity happening.

[B]

No exclusivity in this household. If you are exclusive with someone, you probably shouldn't hang. Yeah, you can't hang, but that's fine.

[A]

We'll stop you at the door. Yeah, if you're exclusive.

[B]

We've done it before. One time we were intercepted. I had no pants on, just a big T shirt. You had like pajamas on.

[A]

I have no idea where you're going with this.

[B]

Well, get ready, buckle up. And we were sitting down after a night out and we were just having our Ubereats as we do every single time we go out. See, that's why I'm guilty. Yeah, Like I need to. How if you know how to stop eating other than taking Ozempic, stop eating after a night out. Please share, because I've gone all my life doing this and it's an issue. And we were sitting down on the floor watching probably a movie or a show and we get a knock on the door.

[A]

Okay, now I know.

[B]

And I was so excited. It's UberEats, right? Like as you would think. No, no, it's a party. There is random people that I have never met before in my life and.

[A]

We did not invite. Like we could have not expected this coming.

[B]

There's no way we invited them. I walked home by myself, cuz you left me.

[A]

I left early.

[B]

You did.

[A]

You were on a mission. You wanted to stay. I was like, love you, but gotta go.

[B]

You're like, I know you'll be back.

[A]

Yeah, see you soon.

[B]

But yeah. So I open the door and no pants on. So quickly I close the door a little bit, you know, because I'm like.

[A]

Well, that's not the Uber driver.

[B]

Listen, you look very different and why is there 20 of you? So they came in, they proceeded to come in and I was like, wait, what? And you were like, no, no, no. You have this thing where you go.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[B]

You do. And I don't know, you say it in a record breaking time, it just comes out like, it's like a tongue twister.

[A]

Yeah. It takes a lot of practice apparently. I've said no, no a lot of.

[B]

Times and it's so Funny. And you're like, I. I think we obviously kicked them out. But that was after us.

[A]

Like, no, we were drunk. We were, like, trying to eat. We were watching a show on the floor. Because we love the floor after the bar.

[B]

I still have no pants on. Okay. Still. And these randoms. We knew one person in the group.

[A]

No, but we were like, how did you even get up? Like, who let you in?

[B]

True. No, I think I. Oh, no, I didn't. Oh, no, I think I did because I thought it was the Uber. Oh, so that's on me. But I was waiting for the Uber.

[A]

No, they caught us by surprise.

[B]

They caught us red handed. I'm like, oh, and it's not you.

[A]

You're like, wait, that's not faux.

[B]

No. Okay. I have been thinking of something this week and we have tried to not talk about things so that we can talk about them today. So I know you probably have things that. Did you even have your phone.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

And that you've written down. Because we've written.

[A]

I have a few, but I don't know if they're gonna fit into this conversation.

[B]

I have a scroll.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But I was thinking, because I was in bed, you know, just laying there. And when we don't. When we're not right beside each other, I have things to tell you.

[A]

No, we're Snapchatting. Like, we could be in our own rooms and we are Snapchatting each other. We're texting. Sometimes you FaceTime me from your room, and I'm like, I'm two steps away. Like, you know where to find me.

[B]

Literally. And then, like, sometimes she closes her door and I'm like, oh, fine. Like, whatever. And all you hear is, knock, knock, can I come in? You're like, if you must.

[A]

But Sarah has this thing where she'll say, can I just say one thing? And then she proceeds to give your entire life story, which we love. Like, I'm like, please, I want to hear it all. But it's funny that you preface. Can I just say one thing?

[B]

One. Just one thing. I just need to say one more thing. And with alcohol, it does resurface quite a few more times.

[A]

Yeah, there's a lot to say when alcohol is involved.

[B]

Absolutely. And I have quite the. You know where that is from where it's me asking if I can say it. Because I've learned in life coaching, which is a real thing. Life coaching is a real thing.

[A]

It's a career. You have anybody that's doubting it? It is a career.

[B]

Don't you Dare doubt it, because we're gonna have madve after that. But I am having a session with Amy tomorrow, which she has no idea yet, but let's do it as her first session tomorrow. She can recap you on how that went. But I. Okay. Sorry, my thing.

[A]

Where'd you just go? We lost you for a second. Physically, you were here.

[B]

I left the vicinity. But I'm back. Circling back. I've learned to say. Can I say one more thing? Because I know sometimes people don't want to hear it.

[A]

Has anyone ever said no?

[B]

Yes. Numerous times. It is normally people that, like, people try to make the joke of no, like, and, like, say it like that, like, as a joke. But I'm like.

[A]

You're like, well, I'm gonna say it anyways.

[B]

Listen, take a seat and buckle up. It's a crazy one. You never know where this is going. Yeah, but that's why I say circling back.

[A]

I mean, I'm like, yeah, okay, we'll go with that. I've never heard you say circling back before.

[B]

Why is anything we do totally fine? Like, you could literally go do something so whack. I'm like, yes.

[A]

You're like. And I'm standing behind you.

[B]

I've never. You could walk outside with, like, a garbage bag on. And I'm like, I will go get my garbage bag.

[A]

First of all, I hope you would not let me leave the house in a garbage bag.

[B]

I would never.

[A]

But it's funny because sometimes after, like, a crazy night out, you will come to me the next day and be like, did I do anything stupid last night? And I'm like, no, you would never do anything stupid. And you're like, okay, thank God.

[B]

Are you trying to tell me that you say that that's a lie?

[A]

No, it's true. I genuinely think that you didn't do anything stupid. Yeah, you could have done the stupidest thing. And I'm like, no, she was right for that.

[B]

Like, you had reasons.

[A]

Like, I understand her. And that was valid.

[B]

I love to say your feelings are so valid. So for me to make a TikTok, coming from emotion is so fine.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, it came from somewhere inside me, and I needed to let the world know. And that's everyone. I can defend myself all day, but this person right here will defend it to death.

[A]

Yeah. I'll figure out a reason for everything you do, even if there isn't one.

[B]

And it's not even like, you're like, I have to get back to you. You're like, no, no, that was Totally valid. They deserved it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. I was going on this tangent because I was going to say when I was in my room the other day thinking about something.

[A]

Circling back.

[B]

Circling back. I was thinking of things that are made by men for men. Because there are some things in this world that a woman just couldn't have done because it just doesn't make sense. Apartments. Like, you're telling me that, like, the people that designed the bathroom or designed the kitchen didn't understand, like, was coming from a female's perspective and being like, the lighting just isn't gonna hit, or like this fixture or like, this drawer just doesn't give enough room for her to put her makeup and her hair products and her tampons and her extra towels and her extra toilet paper and.

[A]

Her extra face pads and hair tools and self tan shampoo and conditioner.

[B]

Like, there's just no way.

[A]

No. We need, like, a full storage unit in every bathroom.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Because, like, a door. Yeah, like a.

[B]

Like one of those, like, small doors.

[A]

You know, I'm picturing now if we were to have, like, designed this apartment, like, how different it would be.

[B]

I would put straight up. You need a sliding tray that goes out, that has shelves so you can have your face cleansers and things on one top shelf, hair tools on the second, whatever, and it just slides out. And then you have another slide out that comes out with tampons, toilet paper. If you use something else down there, it can be on that shelf.

[A]

What else would you use?

[B]

Sometimes I've seen people have, like, baby wipes.

[A]

Oh, okay. That's okay. At least they're cleanly.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know what makes you think. Yeah, it's like.

[B]

Not even about.

[A]

Put the baby weight down.

[B]

Yeah. The baby weights down.

[A]

And hop in the shower.

[B]

Get your sponge. What's the sponge?

[A]

Loofah.

[B]

Loofah. Get your loof.

[A]

Get your loof.

[B]

Okay, carrying on. I would also have the sliding door right beside the shower available that you can quickly reach out if you're in it. Oh, that you can slide it back and be like, you know what? Today I'm going to exfoliate.

[A]

No. The amount of times you're in the shower and you're like, oh, I need this other thing. Like, I didn't even think about that. But where is my exfoliator razor? There's so many things you need in the shower.

[B]

Are you more vulnerable stepping out of the shower soaking wet, or are you.

[A]

More vulnerable doing up my winter coat?

[B]

Tell that story, please.

[A]

I don't even Know where to start with this story. This was another, like, hungover Friday. We were like brain fogged to the max. And we see this group of people outside of this restaurant, elders. And they're all, like, hunched over, zipping up their winter coats. And Sarah is just dying, laughing. And I'm like, what's so funny? And she's like, look how vulnerable they are doing up their winter coats. They can fully hear her. Like, they're right there.

[B]

Was that mean? Maybe a little bit. I didn't mean it as mean. I just was thinking in my head, like, oh, my goodness. Like the contraption that you. The shape. The shape you put your body into, the posture. The posture that you have, trying to get the end of your jacket into that little pocket, that thing that just. The zipper, the zipper, the pocket. And imagine yourself doing that. Right. Maybe over exaggerated a little bit. Compare that. So you have that visually.

[A]

Visually, it's in my mind.

[B]

Okay. Compare that to you're soaking wet. You haven't even conditioned yet. You just shampooed and you're like, oh, my goodness, I need to purple shampoo. And the purple shampoo isn't in your shower.

[A]

Yeah, I.

[B]

It's actually. You just bought a new one and it's in your bedroom. It's not.

[A]

So I have to, like, run around like a little naked rat and grab my purple shampoo. Yeah. I hope no one ever sees me in that state. That's for me and me only. Like, I don't even want you to see me like that.

[B]

I don't even want to see you.

[A]

With, like, my shampoo Mohawk. I'm like, running. Look away.

[B]

Would you let your husband, if you ever had one, hopefully you have one.

[A]

I will have one.

[B]

Yeah. When you have one.

[A]

I mean, if I want one.

[B]

If you want one.

[A]

But I would not want him to see me like that. Like, some things you just don't need your partner to see.

[B]

Like what?

[A]

Like me with, like. No. I was gonna say no self tanner on, but, like, inevitably there is me.

[B]

With no extensions in.

[A]

Ye. No. That is surreal.

[B]

I don't have extensions in. My hair is in a slick back.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Tight. And you have no idea what's in that bun. Is there a lot of hair? Is there any hair? Is there a bald spot? You don't know?

[A]

No. They should, like, wheel you into a back room at the hairdressers. Like, fold the blinds down and be like, okay, we're about to take the extensions out.

[B]

It's time. Close your eyes.

[A]

No, I should put you to sleep.

[B]

They should. It's a risk I'm willing to take. I would sign off. Emergency contact. Amy.

[A]

They wheel you out, you have fresh extensions that you're incoherent, think you're on laughing gas.

[B]

Think of it as someone has to pick you up, but it can't be your mom, because they are gonna be so disappointed in you.

[A]

I'd be, like, taking pictures of you. Like, look how good she looks.

[B]

No, they're out.

[A]

Yeah, you're out, but your hair is in.

[B]

So you're saying that we're just out for the time being, that we don't have anything in our head?

[A]

Yeah. Well, this was your idea. You tell me.

[B]

I thought we were teaming on this.

[A]

No, I support you, and I couldn't agree more.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But anyways, we'll pitch that to the hairdressers.

[B]

Did you. Yeah. Did you ever get your wisdom teeth out?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You're one of those.

[A]

I'm one of those that did it awake, which. Yeah, it's actually crazy. I would never recommend that to anyone. I could literally hear them cracking the teeth out of my head and, like, pulling them out, and I'm looking this girl in the eyes.

[B]

Was that your choice?

[A]

They were already, like, grown out. Like, they had kind of made their way. So she's like, okay, we can just, like, pull it, like a. Like pulling a tooth. So they didn't put me under, but I was like. I was fully awake. I was numb and everything, but I could still hear it, which. That haunts me.

[B]

That is my worst nightmare. I hate the dentist.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I hate the dentist so much. Don't touch my teeth. But obviously, it feels so good after. Like, they feel so clean.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I am a little kid. I don't like the dentist. I think, like, scratching my tooth. Like, what if you hit something?

[A]

Yeah. I remember going to the dentist one time after getting in this crazy fight with my boyfriend, and I sit down in the chair, and I just felt so stressed that I start bawling my eyes out. And the dentist comes in and she goes, I know you don't like being at the dentist. Right. She's like, a lot of people feel this way. I'm like, oh, that's not it.

[B]

Let's just go with that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Did you go with that?

[A]

I was like, yeah, I'm just really scared right now. I'm nervous.

[B]

Yeah, that's totally fine. Do you have any other things that you would implement into the apartment if you were to make it yourself?

[A]

That's a great question. I feel like we didn't give this place a lot of credit when we moved in. And then we would be sitting down and hear, like, a bang. And we're like, oh, my God, what was that? I thought we were getting intruded for, like, three weeks straight. I'm like, there's someone living in the walls or something. Then we found out we had an ice machine that we didn't even know a week later. Yeah, like, three weeks. A month after living here, Two months.

[B]

After living here, we found out that the fridge gives us water.

[A]

We have a water dispenser. And we were filling up this Brita. Every five seconds. Like, Sarah would fill this thing so full that it was, like, carrying away.

[B]

She lift it out of the thing. Like, she. It almost took you out.

[A]

It almost took me out on multiple occasions.

[B]

That was so funny. You're like, why did you fill this up that high?

[A]

No, it was, like, overflowing. I was, like, slipping in it. I'm like, okay, why is this so full?

[B]

What's the goal for it to be full?

[A]

I mean, we want to be hydrated, but looking back now, we probably should have just spent more time looking at the fridge and realized there was a water dispenser.

[B]

The whole time you are doing, you were on your big girl shit. You were painting your dresser outside, and you blew the fuse.

[A]

No. Like, I go through periods where I'm so ambitious. I'm like, today, I'm gonna change the world. I'm gonna paint my dresser. I'm gonna work, I'm gonna do a million things, and then sometimes it all just comes crashing down. And.

[B]

She was out there. I felt so bad for you. She had her. She had her dresser outside. It's been painted for hours. She. Then I was like. She's like, it's still sticky. I'm like, I think you're supposed to wipe it down after. And then we wiped it down. Still sticky. I was like, take the hair blow dryer and take it to it and just start going. She plugs it in. And then my charger, doo doo.

[A]

And the lights all flick off. The music stops. Like, the whole production in here cut out.

[B]

And we go into that big box. What's it called? Electric box.

[A]

Electrical box.

[B]

We find it in my room.

[A]

After looking the. Searching the entire apartment again.

[B]

We did not phone a friend. We took this on ourselves and we looked at it, and we were like, this looks as if. If I switch the wrong one, all hell's about to break loose. The ceiling is about to cave in. It's the switch that's holding this place up.

[A]

Like, this whole apartment is gonna blow up if we click the wrong thing. And it was funny because we had been searching for it for so long that we, like, do a happy dance when we find it. We're like, oh, my God, yes, it's in your room. And then we open it up, and both of us just stare at it in silence for, like, 30 seconds.

[B]

I wish that it wasn't in my room. That thing traumatizes me every day. I need to put a picture over it or something. Is that safe?

[A]

I don't know. You're asking the wrong girl.

[B]

Okay, we'll phone a friend.

[A]

Yeah, for that.

[B]

That and I also put up my pictures in my room with a leveler.

[A]

Leveler. Yep.

[B]

And they're not level, so you tell me. You make that make sense.

[A]

Yeah, we don't understand, like, the leveler. We tried. We did our best. Somehow they're all still on a hard slant.

[B]

Yep. I have so many notes in my thing of us to talk about that. They're on so many different paths. I'm looking like you said something earlier, and I'm not gonna lie.

[A]

Oh, no.

[B]

I looked down at my phone and I blacked out, and I have no idea what you said.

[A]

I feel I'm in a similar situation because I just looked over at your phone, and all I see is big fat on one line. That's it. No context.

[B]

Big fat. I don't know why I wrote this one down, because we are not talking about that.

[A]

Okay? That's for us and us only.

[B]

I don't even want to explain Big fat. Like, it's not even an enjoyable situation.

[A]

No, we'll. We'll graze over that.

[B]

I need to talk about another thing, and then we'll get into some questions that other people talked about.

[A]

It's true for both of us. Right now, I feel like we have so much going on and we're actually so busy. I've never been this busy in my life that if I'm, like, ghosting you or not answering your messages, it's not even on purpose.

[B]

That's not a lie.

[A]

We're not trying to play a game. It's just, like, I don't even. I'm just trying to get through the day.

[B]

No, like, we have an event tonight. Every night.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So it's like, we need to get done. ABCDE 9 to 5 jobs your job, and 9 to 5 jobs your job.

[A]

AND whatever that is.

[B]

We have to get ready, take content, maybe a podcast, and go like, it's the life of our dream. We need to. We need to sit and just say thank you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because we should be appreciative as where we are right now.

[A]

I actually am so appreciative of where we are right now. And I mean that, like, not just saying that. I. Every day, I'm like, wow, this is so fun. Like, life is so fun right now.

[B]

Like, I. I don't know about you, but I was not in the best place. I've said this before, but I wasn't in the best place. And I genuinely love our life. Like, we. I get people every single day. Even Joelle the other day was like, oh, like, I want to come visit you guys. And we have so much going on. I would want to be with us. I would want to be. Me too.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know what I mean?

[A]

I totally agree. I think both of our lives have changed drastically. If you look back a year ago, like, we were in such different places and everything that's happened, like, whether it be something a little traumatizing or something hard that we had to go through, like, it led us to this place. And I think it all happened for a reason. Like, we're both so happy and thriving right now and.

[B]

And we couldn't have this life and we couldn't have. We couldn't be doing what we're doing right now, genuinely, if we had a boyfriend, like, they would be holding us back on the certain things that we are doing right now.

[A]

Yeah, they would.

[B]

Like, I know that sucks to say and, like, I wanna. But it would be a happy life if. If we were with someone, dating someone, but it would be a very different life. And I think when you are single, you have time to be selfish and work on you. And that's exactly what we're doing.

[A]

Yeah. I think appreciate this space that you're in and like, the life that you're living in the moment instead of focusing on, like, what's next and feeling like there's pressure to get a boyfriend or, like, settle down in a relationship. I was on FaceTime with one of my friends this week and we were talking about, like, she said she was feeling lonely and she was kind of trying to, like, talk to someone or find a guy. And I was like, dating when you're lonely is like grocery shopping when you're hungover or hungry. Oh, my God, you pick out. How do you think of that?

[B]

Did you read that somewhere?

[A]

Maybe? I read it and it was just like in the back of my mind again.

[B]

I'm gonna close my Eyes.

[A]

Okay. Dating when you're lonely is like grocery shopping. When you're hungover or hungry.

[B]

That's the best analogy I've ever heard in my entire life.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Well done.

[A]

You pick the wrong things. Like, you just need something.

[B]

You overindulge.

[A]

Yeah. And then you get home and you're like, why did I buy a cantaloupe? I don't even like that.

[B]

That's not even what I wanted.

[A]

That's not even what I wanted. After one good meal, you're like, wait, I didn't need any of this. I just spent a hundred dollars and two hours in the grocery store.

[B]

I wasted time. Money. Time. Time. Time is so precious. Like, stop wasting. And we are so. We're very similar. But we're very different. But it's also like, we're similar in the sense of we support each other so much. Like, if you want to do something to help your brand, your business, yourself, whatever. I'm like, okay, I hear you. I see you. I understand that this means something to you.

[A]

How can I help?

[B]

And you're the exact same way.

[A]

Yeah. Which is so valuable to have a friend like that.

[B]

I think we're lucky to be living together, to be so in a great place, in a similar spot of our lives and all that. So I'm like, we might, like, how long is this gonna last? That's sad.

[A]

We can't think about the end. No. We're living in the moment. We just said that's what we gotta do.

[B]

I saw you erase some of the.

[A]

Events because they're over.

[B]

I know, but we can't reminisce on the past.

[A]

I mean, I think, like, the pink and green font was just a lot for me, so I'm like, let's just, like, get rid of it all.

[B]

But you left the guy's name that wrote it there.

[A]

Yeah. There's a male's signature. Like, I don't know who he thought he was signing that for, but he signed our fridge.

[B]

Let me tell you who he was signing him for. It was you. Like, point blank period.

[A]

Well, he didn't need to do that.

[B]

Okay, before we end this, because we do have to go to brunch, let's answer some questions, because I couldn't answer any of them. I could have, but listen, a girl can only do so much.

[A]

We got places to be.

[B]

I'm just a girl. Question number one. Are you ready?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

How do I make a guy? And then in brackets, dry texts and replies after half a day, slash, a day to reply faster or better.

[A]

Oh, it sounds a little bit like you're. You're probably texting him too often or putting in a little too much effort. If he's not texting you back fast enough or wanting to text you. I would maybe talk to a new guy.

[B]

You're either giving too much or he's pulling away. Or that's just him. But I'm gonna delete the third one if that's just him. Because anyone gets excited when they're talking to someone that they're interested in. And like, so it's like you can't even give them an excuse. Why would you even give them that excuse?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So either. And in both cases of A and B, or 1 or 2, you should pull away a bit and see if they double text or see if they give a little bit more energy. When they see that you're not giving as much. You need to scare them a little bit. And I know that's quotations toxic, but holy. Like, be toxic a bit.

[A]

Yeah. Don't give them too much. Like, you have to. You have to play a bit of a game. So maybe switch it up. Be a little bit inconsistent with how fast you respond or how often you text him. And I'm sure he'll come running back. But don't give him too much.

[B]

Disappear for a day. Make. Be mysterious and make him wonder what you're doing and where you are. Make him think about you without you being right in front of him. Because guys can get annoyed when it's too much.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Or like over stimulated and they're like, ugh, you know?

[A]

Yeah. And I think it devalues you a little bit. You give too much and you're texting someone too much. You're too available to them. I think you have to focus on yourself. Maybe not respond as often or as quickly and that'll make them want you more.

[B]

I agree. And I think the whole devalue thing is huge, like, for you to even put into your head and like, make you look at it from that point of view. Because you are a certain value when you go into that situation. When you start talking to them, when they see you at a bar or they start talking to you or they see you online and they go, oh, my gosh, this hot girl. And then they're like, is she gonna respond to me? And then you respond to him. And then if you keep giving too much right away, that's bringing your value down. If you stand on business and you know who are and you know what you want and you're not going to let someone stress you out and make you go, oh, like, he didn't text me today. He didn't. Whatever that is devaluing you. So you need to be like, I don't care if he texts me back. If he does, great, but if he doesn't, then that's fine too.

[A]

Yeah, I agree. Focus on you. And if you give too much to any guy, he's going to think in his head, why is she so available to me? Why does she like me so much? It makes it look like you are less of a lesser value.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Keep your cards close to your chest, especially in the beginning 100.

[B]

And like, be mysterious. Be. You know, we talk about red flags a lot and someone asked about green flags, so let's talk about that because I actually have a few.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

My green flag is if they. You can meet whatever or meet online or whatever that may be. They ask you to go on a date. Like, when are you free this week? If the first conversation is to plan to see you in person and take you out, I think that's a green flag.

[A]

Definitely. We love action. We love takes action and wants to pursue and plan. Yeah.

[B]

I think another red flag. I mean, green flags. Sorry. Just love those red flags. Another green flag is getting the Uber paying for the dinner. Yeah, like, don't let's 20, 25. Do not offer to pay, girls. Just don't.

[A]

No, it's just not worth it. No, you should not have to. Now if a guy wants to split the bill with you, it's just like an ick. The biggest ick. Or if he wants you to pay for things, like on dates in the beginning, as great as a guy could be, that would just definitely give me the ick a little bit. I hate to say it.

[B]

Another green flag would be obviously, consistency. Like, is he calling you if he didn't text you, blah, blah. Is he trying to keep planning on another time to see you? Every time he sees you. You know what I mean? Like, he wants. He's showing that effort and just doing things for you. Like, guys, a lot of the times don't say it, but they. They show things. Like, is he bringing something over? Is he bringing food? Is he bringing flowers? Is he, you know, showing up on.

[A]

Time or early to a date. Like, those little things, actually, you. You pick up on it and it means so much in the grand scheme of things.

[B]

Opening a door for you.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Walking on the right side of the sidewalk, giving you the lounge seat at a restaurant.

[A]

The last bite. If you're sharing. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Offers you another drink. If he sees it. If he sees that yours is empty, like, doing those things that, like, you. You might have to ask from somebody else. But for him, he's looking at you and reading every. He's so present with you that he sees it like, you don't have to ask.

[A]

Which is funny, because I feel like those are just people's mannerisms. Like, some people grew up that way and have those mannerisms. Some people don't. They could be a great guy, but they just don't have that in them. Like.

[B]

But I think when you really like someone you like, you go out of your way and out of your mannerisms a bit more.

[A]

For sure.

[B]

But I do see what you're saying. Sometimes an Is just an.

[A]

Yeah. I find guys. And this is a little bit of a stereotype, so take it with a grain of salt. But I find guys that grow up with only brothers, like boy households, they do not have those mannerisms at all. If they have at least one sister. That's what we need, one sister. Their behavior and their mannerisms are so different and, like, more considerate, even.

[B]

Like, the guys that have no. Or even the guys that have no sisters and only have the mom, like, that doesn't compare. Like. Like the mom and being a mama's boy. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's not the same. It means so much different to me. If you have a sister, a sister. Someone that you see going through pain, emotions, getting toyed with other girls. I mean, other boys, and getting broken up with and seeing them go through their period and seeing them have a friendship breakup and, like, understanding that side of female and female's emotions does mean so much different.

[A]

Yeah. And it just made me think. This guy that I was, I went on a few dates with, we were talking, circling back to green flags. We were talking about siblings and family, and I said that I have an older sister and a younger brother, and he said he grew up with an older sister, and it, like, changed his perspective on women because he grew up looking up to his sister and thinking she was cool and wanting her approval. So it changed his perspective and how he treated women. I think.

[B]

I love that, and I think that's how it should be.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm not gonna date anyone that doesn't have a sister.

[A]

Yep. You heard it here first.

[B]

Yeah. Sorry. If you don't have a sister, move right along.

[A]

Yeah, keep it moving.

[B]

Okay. We do have to go to brunch, but I love you guys. If you like this girls chat kind of vibe. You're in luck.

[A]

I did, too. We could do this every Sunday.

[B]

We could do this every Sunday. Well, Saturday, but it's fine.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

And on that note, over and out. I love you. I will see you next Thursday. Thank you, guys.