#4366 Oh My God, We Are Creshing It!

Summary

Podcast Summary: TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live – Episode #4366 "Oh My God, We Are Crushing It!"

Release Date: December 25, 2024
Hosts: Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh
Description: TBTL is a daily show hosted by two longtime friends navigating the world with humor and camaraderie. In this festive episode, they dive into a variety of topics ranging from holiday traditions to pop culture conspiracies, all infused with their trademark wit.

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1. Holiday Musings and Musical Aspirations

The episode kicks off with a lighthearted conversation about Andrew Walsh’s aspirations in the music industry. Andrew shares his dream of becoming a singer-songwriter, expressing a particular fondness for country western music and artists like Shania Twain.

Notable Quote:
Andrew Walsh [00:02]: "I'm actually hoping someday to break into the music business As a singer? Songwriter."

The trio then transitions into a playful rendition of a Christmas song penned by Andrew, showcasing his budding songwriting skills.

Notable Quote:
Andrew Walsh [00:10]: "The best thing about singing at Christmas is the Coco Carolyn and fun."

2. Host Performances and On-Air Dynamics

Luke and Genevieve react humorously to Andrew’s impromptu performance, highlighting the casual and spontaneous nature of the show. Luke humorously describes himself as having "the most apoplectic look" due to the unexpected performance.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [03:04]: "I've never had a more apoplectic look on the Riverside program than I am getting from my dear friend, the longest running co-bro of the show, Mr. Andrew Walsh."

Genevieve teases Luke about the emotional depth of his on-air demeanor, adding to the friendly banter.

3. Boxing Fight Speculations: Tyson vs. Jake Paul

A significant portion of the episode delves into the contentious topic of boxing, specifically discussing whether Mike Tyson threw his recent fight against Jake Paul. The hosts explore various conspiracy theories, including speculation about Netflix's influence on fight outcomes and the physical limitations of Tyson due to his age.

Notable Quotes:
Andrew Walsh [09:31]: "Did Tyson throw that fight? Was that rigged?"

Luke Burbank [10:59]: "There’s some speculation that Jake Paul could have hurt Mike Tyson in the later rounds because Mike Tyson just didn’t really have his legs."

Genevieve adds depth to the discussion by mentioning observable physical cues that might indicate Tyson's performance was compromised.

Notable Quote:
Genevieve [10:59]: "I think if you watch Tyson's legs at the beginning, like it's even before he's like tired out. It just didn't look like the same Tyson as far as how he uses his legs."

4. Holiday Drinks: Eggnog and Whiskey Preferences

The conversation shifts to holiday beverages, with a focus on eggnog and various whiskeys. Luke shares his nostalgic yet critical take on eggnog, mentioning how his mother diluted it with 2% milk, leading him to prefer a lighter version.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [11:50]: "I can’t drink uncut eggnog. It seems too sweet to me."

Genevieve discusses her transition from preferring Jameson to Jim Beam, attributing it to holiday traditions and familial influences.

Notable Quote:
Genevieve [15:26]: "I locked into Jim Beam … because it was so sweet that I was putting less and less eggnog in, I was just sipping Jim Beam."

5. Airline Mileage Runs and Alaska Airlines Status

Luke introduces the concept of a "mileage run," explaining his strategy to achieve elite status with Alaska Airlines. He humorously details the lengths he goes to accumulate miles, including booking flights to Frankfurt solely for miles.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [16:13]: "It's called a mileage run and people do it all the time. I'm getting close to having flown 100,000 miles which is the highest level you can be at."

The discussion includes the perks of attaining 100K status, such as free lounge memberships and the ability to bestow MVP gold status upon a friend.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [24:07]: "They give you one to bestow on any other person that you want."

6. Critique of EQM Casino Advertising

The hosts offer a critical take on EQM Casino’s advertising claims, particularly their slogan of being "the biggest and best in the Northwest." They argue that this claim is misleading and more of a self-appointed nickname rather than a factual statement.

Notable Quote:
Genevieve [25:43]: "They call it that because you sat down. It’s like giving yourself a nickname and then being like, that's why they call me the Fisher Cat."

Luke humorously ties this critique to potential concert events at EQM, blending criticism with promotional banter.

7. Elvis Stamps and Pop Culture References

A nostalgic segment explores the history of Elvis Presley commemorative stamps, discussing the controversies surrounding which version of Elvis was chosen for the stamp design. The hosts reference podcasts like "99% Invisible" to provide additional context.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [29:43]: "It was considered kind of controversial at the time because commemorative stamps had never been used on, like, pop culture figures."

Genevieve shares a humorous anecdote about overhearing someone request a Betty White stamp, tying it back to the Elvis discussion.

Notable Quote:
Genevieve [31:04]: "Apparently the Betty White stamps are not coming out until 2025."

8. Listener Donations and Show Wrap-Up

As the episode nears its end, Luke and Genevieve express gratitude towards their listeners and donors, acknowledging the financial support that allows them to continue producing the show even on Christmas Day.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [33:48]: "These folks whose names I'm about to read are they're giving TBT all their hard earned money every month… it's the only way that we could do this day in and day out, including here on this actual Christmas day."

They proceed to thank individual donors, personalizing their appreciation with mentions of names and locations, fostering a sense of community among listeners.

Notable Quote:
Genevieve [36:26]: "Thank you, Lauren."

The episode concludes with a heartfelt holiday message, inviting listeners to stay tuned for upcoming content as the hosts reflect on the past year and look forward to the new one.

Notable Quote:
Luke Burbank [42:07]: "Merry Christmas. Thank you. Yes. And a happy New year."

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Conclusion:

Episode #4366 of TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live offers a festive blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and topical discussions. From exploring holiday traditions and personal aspirations to delving into pop culture controversies and listener interactions, Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh deliver an engaging and entertaining Christmas Day broadcast. Whether you’re a long-time listener or tuning in for the first time, this episode encapsulates the essence of TBTL’s charm and camaraderie.

Transcript

[Luke Burbank]

So what do you do?

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm actually hoping someday to break into the music business As a singer? Songwriter.

[Genevieve]

No way.

[Andrew Walsh]

Way.

[Luke Burbank]

What's your favorite kind of music?

[Andrew Walsh]

Country western.

[Genevieve]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Do you like Shania Twain?

[Genevieve]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

The best thing about singing at Christmas is the Coco Carolyn and fun.

[Luke Burbank]

I know that song.

[Andrew Walsh]

They gonna sleigh good Santa sut reindeer skirts Watching the windows fog Drinking some eggnog that's good. Fill up a stocking a spray on some flocking Put up a tree Sports on TV I want to be free yet to feel the way I feel Man, I feel like some Christmas.

[Genevieve]

Whew.

[Andrew Walsh]

What? You hated it?

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, I just. I wasn't prepared for a performance, so if I.

[Andrew Walsh]

You know what? I totally put myself out there doing that, and that was not an easy thing to do. And if you're the kind of man that can't support a woman's ambition, then I don't think there's any reason to continue this date.

[Genevieve]

Tbtl. There's a crazy rumor going around that you folks like milk and cookies.

[Luke Burbank]

Ah, fragile. That must be Italian. Well, I think that's just fragile, honey. You know that little ice rink across from Santa's village? The Rinky Dink? Know it? I named it. I named it after my dink. It's very rinky.

[Andrew Walsh]

I just feel like I'm excited and.

[Genevieve]

I feel relaxed and I'm read to.

[Luke Burbank]

Party with the best of them A.

[Genevieve]

New holiday was born A Festivus for the rest of us.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, all right. Hello, good morning and welcome, everyone to a Wednesday edition of tbtl, the show that was turned away at the inn. There was no place for this show to go and then away in a manger no radio station for a bed the little TBTL laid down its. I promised I wasn't gonna get emotion emotional, but sweet head, I always get emotional when I say sweet head. I am. I've never had a more apoplectic look on the Riverside program than I am getting from my dear friend, the longest running co bro of the show, Mr. Andrew Walsh. Hello. Merry Christmas. How are you?

[Genevieve]

Good. I'm not apoplectic. I'm just. I'm a little confused as to what happened there. Were you did. Do you really get emotional when you think about that song or did you just have a stutter and then you were covering it up?

[Luke Burbank]

Stutter. It was a dramatic effect.

[Genevieve]

It was a dramatic effect. You were. Okay, because we were talking a couple of weeks ago on the show about smelling babies heads. I wasn't. You were so I wasn't sure if you were having like a real emotional.

[Luke Burbank]

Moment or something broadcasting from inside a prison right now, by the way, because, yes, the baby head smelling thing did not end well.

[Genevieve]

Hey, it got you in the papers and. Sure it did. No bad publicity.

[Luke Burbank]

Sure.

[Genevieve]

Just sort of try.

[Luke Burbank]

Look out, wet bandits. I'm the new cover of the New York newspaper for crime doing Merry Christmas, by the way.

[Genevieve]

You said it's a Wednesday edition. Nay, my friend. Nay. Hey, I'm neighing like a horse in a manger. Nay. It is a Christmas edition, not a Wednesday.

[Luke Burbank]

Christmas doesn't have a date.

[Genevieve]

Has no weekday. Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

No, it doesn't. I reposted something somebody wrote on blue sky. They wrote, wow. Gold, frankincense and myrrh. This is so great. My wife's boyfriend's baby is going to love it. Thank you so much.

[Genevieve]

It's pretty good.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't even really understand it.

[Genevieve]

I know. I'm trying to figure that out, too. It's like, obviously we're talking about my wife boyfriend's baby.

[Luke Burbank]

So it's like Joseph is like. Joseph is. It's like a throuple. And Joseph's in it, but he's also having. But of course, he and Mary, as the story goes, they had never really, you know, had a conjugal visit.

[Genevieve]

Yeah, sure. Well, anyway, can we break this?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, Merry Christmas, happy holidays.

[Genevieve]

Yeah, we really just got into the.

[Luke Burbank]

That's the show. Thank you. Yes.

[Genevieve]

Just really. I mean, we're off to a hot start, I would say, you know, talking about whether Mary and Joseph did the nasty. I think we're really in the Christmas spirit right now. Merry Christmas, everybody. Gold. I'm familiar with frankincense. Is that like incense? Only an old timey way of saying it. Frankincense.

[Luke Burbank]

It's like incense that doesn't mince words.

[Genevieve]

That's right. It's like.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm sorry, I'm just a straight shooter.

[Genevieve]

I'm. Frankincense. Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I was.

[Genevieve]

And then. And then. So myrrh. That leaves myrrh.

[Luke Burbank]

I feel like that's also a spice or something. Gold, frankincense and myrrh.

[Genevieve]

A lot of. A lot of smelly things. I like smelly things. Sure.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, if you're in that manger, it's, you know, probably a little ripe.

[Genevieve]

Would you say if. If you're. If you're setting up the sort of tableau of TBTL being sort of like a manger scene, a crash, if you will.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Genevieve]

Would you say that. I Am.

[Luke Burbank]

Whoa, dude, That's a great use of. Use of crash.

[Genevieve]

Yeah, I crushed it. You really crashed, dude.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, my God, we are crushing it.

[Genevieve]

Oh, my God, we are crushing it.

[Luke Burbank]

No, because, you know, my dad and I watch a lot of this show called Shetland, and it's set in, you know, in the uk, but it's like, it's actually kind of in between England and Norway. Everyone's going to Bergen all the time when it's like, that's the big town that's up in Norway. And they're always talking about things happening at the Kreche. It really is kind of their term for farm.

[Genevieve]

I've only heard it in the context of, like, specifically the nativity scene. I didn't know that it was a generic term at all.

[Luke Burbank]

It was. They use it. There's often the thing about this place, this place, Shetland, this town lyric, which is on Shetland. And I probably said this before, but it's very, very strong Cabot Cove vibes. It's like, wow, this is a violent place. Sure. There's a murder a week and it's often happening up at the Kressh. Oh, no. You know what? Maybe I'm confusing Kressh and Croft. I'm sorry, Andrew. I think I'm. I think. I think Croft is the thing I'm thinking of. They're always talking about something being at the croft, which I believe is their kind of. That's what that means. Like the farm.

[Genevieve]

I see. I did not look it up, but I didn't. I looked it up briefly to make sure that Kressh was what I thought it was, which was a manger scene, but I thought it was also maybe broadened out, but no, I guess were. Anyway, my question for you, also a.

[Luke Burbank]

Kansas state representative named Chris. Chris Croft, which I feel like if he's not making the Kansas state legislator jump, jump, I don't know who is.

[Genevieve]

Oh, I thought you're going with that. I was.

[Luke Burbank]

Croft will make you jump, jump. The Daddy Mac will make you jump, jump.

[Genevieve]

I was so confused by that. First of all, I think I miss Nick. I feel like I'm off my game today without having Nick here. I apologize for that. But I thought you were going to make a Chris Craft joke because you're so into Chris Craft boats that. That I was geared up. And then you said, jump, jump. And I was like. My brain was so scrambled there because I was like, are you jumping from the boat in the legislature? I was making. I was trying to explain a joke.

[Luke Burbank]

That you didn't Say, huh, I was making a joke about the band Cross.

[Genevieve]

Sure.

[Luke Burbank]

Because the guy's named Chris Croft. But anyway, it's Christmas. Here we are, we're the only podcast. Listen, I'm not, I'm not trying to brag on us, but like you mentioned this before we started recording, we are Dolphin at Lee for Sharks, the only five day a week podcast that is putting out a brand new episode on Christmas Day, albeit not our best work. It's clearly evident, but we. But it is happening, people, and that's what matters.

[Genevieve]

The sad thing is, is what if this is my best work? What if this is. What if this is the high point, the high water mark?

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, you know, that's a good. You never know when it's the high water mark. This is something that gambling has taught me. You, it's, you know, the dream is that you, you know exactly when to step off the merry go round because you realize, oh, this is the high point. It doesn't get better than this. But of course, most people don't see the work of both Aaron Rodgers and Mike Tyson. It's hard to know when you've hit the high point. And maybe this is the high point for you. Maybe this is your final show.

[Genevieve]

This is. I don't like the way that sounded threatening. This is the perfect show to do this. I've been meaning to ask you this for a long time. First of all, it's very, very timely right now. And also, I can't think of a better time to ask this question than here on Christmas morning. Did Tyson throw that fight? Was that rigged? Was the rig in?

[Luke Burbank]

I didn't watch it, so I can't, I can't give a particularly informed opinion. I, I do. I have heard rumblings that Netflix had some sort of rules around basically how actually hard they could go. Because, you know, Netflix is not a boxing network. I mean, nor is hbo. But the thing is, if you get the fight on HBO or Dazone, one of these other places, you're paying for the fight, probably. And so, you know, presumably everybody watching kind of is familiar with it being a very violent sport. There's some speculation that it wasn't so much that Tyson threw the fight, it was that both fighters were instructed to not actually, like, really like, hurt each other in a way that was going to be grotesque to America. In fact, if anything, there's a fair amount of speculation that Jake Paul, who just seems to be like a noted bad person, just, just a horrible, horrible person, not that Tyson is a walk in the park but that in fact it was Jake Paul who kind of let up on Tyson in the end because he was, you know, a lot younger and is a actually fairly decent boxer for someone who started off lighting couches on fires and swimming pools as part of a Hype House on YouTube. And that in fact, Jake Paul could have, maybe could have hurt Mike Tyson in the later rounds because Mike Tyson just didn't really have his legs. He just, you know, being 60 years old is really different than being 26 years old.

[Genevieve]

It's funny that you mentioned legs because that's what I heard. Somebody said like, you know, like, I think I probably heard this on the LeBatard show or something along those lines. Somebody said, like, if you watch Tyson's legs at the beginning, like it's even before he's like tired out. It's just didn't look like the same Tyson as far as how he uses his legs, which that seemed to be a tell. But I think I'm digging pretty deep into some conspiracy theories now. I wanted to apologize. I said there was the rig in and I knew that was the fix in a great phrase. I love the phrase the fix is in. And I'm mad at myself for messing that up especially.

[Luke Burbank]

I didn't even notice it. Andrew, really? It's Christmas morning. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm on my third to fourth eggnog.

[Genevieve]

Oh, nice. I'm feeling spiked. Are you, Are you still with. No.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, one time in my life, but. But I'm, Yeah, I'm just, you know, I'm just on the regular stuff these days.

[Genevieve]

But actually, can we talk about that for a second? Eggnog. You and eggnog. Tell me about your relationship with eggnog.

[Luke Burbank]

Love it.

[Genevieve]

You do? Okay, sure.

[Luke Burbank]

Grew up. Here's the thing though. Again, it was a, it was a, it was something that was very, very special to the, the Christmas holiday. Like we did not have it before Thanksgiving and if we, and in fact, when we had it, my mom would water it down with 2% milk.

[Genevieve]

Oh, you've told me this. That hurts my soul.

[Luke Burbank]

But the thing is that means to this day, I can't drink uncut eggnog. It seems too sweet to me. So I, I will also kind of, you know, thin out my eggnog a bit because that's how I was raised. But I wish I wasn't.

[Genevieve]

I wish I had a Jim Beam with a bunch of James that'll fit.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, I'll say this, even in my more rip roaring days, I Never really was into the idea of alcohol in a dairy product like that. I did have a. I had a brief dance with White Russians ever. Till about the time that I met. Oh, this would have been so much funnier if I could remember of the famous ballet dancer who in Baryshnikov Barishnikov. Just pretend.

[Genevieve]

Okay, let's just.

[Luke Burbank]

Let's just, like, everyone Forget the last 20 seconds.

[Genevieve]

Yeah, I already did.

[Luke Burbank]

I did have a brief dance with. With the. The White Russian. Did I ever tell you about the time I met Barishnikov?

[Genevieve]

It's right there. Just like. So.

[Luke Burbank]

No. You know, I think it was probably.

[Genevieve]

Post the Dennis Miller of podcasting.

[Luke Burbank]

Hey, babe. Like, that's my Dennis Miller.

[Genevieve]

Oh, that paid off.

[Luke Burbank]

I did. I'm sure. Honestly, I'm sure it was inspired by the Big Lebowski. I had a little moment of, like, thinking that the White Russian was. Was my drink, except it's so, so sweet. And like, you just. If you have more than one of those, you're just in a world of pain from, like, the headache. All that is to say, the idea of an eggnog with booze in it was never really. It seemed weird to me to have, like, a whiskey in, like, a dairy product like that.

[Genevieve]

Well, okay, this is interesting. A lot of people are surprised when they hear that I like eggnog because growing up, I had an aversion to cheese, and I don't like yogurt and various, like, kind of dairy products, but I really do like eggnog. I grew up drinking it, and I liked it. And now this is where things get a little controversial, because there's somebody who's listening to the show right now, presumably, who is going to disagree with the story or the details of the story I'm about to tell. And I'll explain why in a second. Although it's just his word versus mine. But I believe the reason I drink, when I'm drinking whiskey, when I'm drinking hard alcohol, my kind of go to is Jim Beam. And it hasn't been that way my entire life. When I was a young kid around 10, I was more of a Jameson kid. No. Like, I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

I aged into the Jim Beam.

[Genevieve]

Yeah. No, I do think that, like, when, like, I was hanging out with you used to drink a lot of Jameson. So I was probably drinking more Jameson then. And then at one point, when it came to brown alcohol, I really locked into Jim Beam. And I've been drinking Jim Beam kind of on the reg for, I don't know. Maybe five or ten years now. And the reason I am convinced that this happened was because I, like you usually drank eggnog straight. No. Well, I didn't put the 2% in there and I also didn't put boost, I just drank it. But then my brother in law, Zachary, Genevieve's brother, came over to spend the holidays with us one time and came over, I swear, with a thing of eggnog and a thing of Jim Beam and we started pouring the eggnog into the Jim Beam and I was like, oh wow, this Jim Beam, it was kind of, it really complemented it because it was, it's a sweeter, it's sort of a sweeter whiskey certainly than like a. Yes. And that's why I'm a little bit.

[Luke Burbank]

If I were to be drinking Whis, I would go more Jameson than Jim Beam because of that sweetness of Jim Beam is, is a little bit less preferred by me. But I could see how it would work much better with the eggnog.

[Genevieve]

Yeah. And the thing is, and I like it, but, but I understand why it wouldn't be for everybody's tapes taste. It's not like Jim Beam is some sort of celebrated old school whiskey or something like that. But I mean, Zachary now claims he would never bring Jim Beam to our house because he doesn't like Jim Beam. But I just remember the only thing.

[Luke Burbank]

I can say the story is diverged.

[Genevieve]

Yeah, maybe he brought over Maker's Mark, which, but not quite as sweet, made by the same company, I think. But I remember being Jim Beam and basically pouring myself a thing of eggnog with a little bit of Jim Beam in there. And then like maybe as, maybe not just the night went on, but maybe as the weeks went on, realizing that the Jim Beam was so sweet that I was putting less and less eggnog in, I was just sipping Jim Beam. I'm like, actually Jim Beam's pretty sweet on its own. And then you can just sort of skip the whole eggnog middleman. And that's how I ended up drinking so much. Kind of like Jim Beam or like again, if I am drinking a whiskey, that's how it became my regular whiskey. Zachary claims that that is not a true story because he would never bring Jim Beam to our house. All I'm saying is, and I'm saying this on Christmas, he is a dirty, dirty liar. And I don't know why he's lying. I don't know what he's covering up, but I will get to the bottom of it.

[Luke Burbank]

Enter a sante Sort of so are you. I actually got what I got into when I lived in LA on Christmas morn was a mimosa situation because the weather in LA was so nice. And that was a big moment for me of realizing I really, really loved that town. I've probably talked about this before, but, you know, when you move from the northwest down to like California, as you also did with Genevieve, I feel like when I moved down there and I would come back home to visit Addie or to see people, there would be a lot of like, well, don't you miss the seasons? Don't you miss, you know, Christmas day and it's cold, maybe it's snowed. And I kind of wondered if I would. And then I remember like the first Christmas I was there was 75 degrees. I walked outside, we had an orange tree in our yard, picked an orange also. That was the beginning of me drinking in the morning on Christmas, like in my life. Like I don't think I had. I don't think that had been a thing that I had really ever integrated into the experience. And let me tell you, it was great. I remember just being like day drunk on mimosas at about 11am at my house in LA with my, my first ex wife and just thinking, I don't miss shit. I didn't rig. Just being like, oh, this is the greatest. And then so for many years, then after that it was a thing where I would have, I'd have some, some drinks on like the thing I'd be looking forward to would be the drinking on Christmas morning. But again, much more in the direction of the mimosas than the, than the eggnog spiked. Now there are some. There's one epic picture of me as a kid where I could have used some booze. I think there is a family picture from Christmas morning when we finally started celebrating Christmas that gives your birthday party plugging your ears photo a real run for its money, really. It's like we're all sitting on the floor because that was like the Christmas tradition again. We didn't have a tree for a long time, but we would like do presents in the stocking for some reason that was allowed. But we'd all be sitting around on the carpet in the living room and all my sisters are just, are beaming and I obviously something has happened because I have the biggest scowl on my face. I'm so mad.

[Genevieve]

It's probably just the click of the camera though, right? Or do you think it really wasn't. You were having some sort of a issue.

[Luke Burbank]

I was having some kind of meltdown. I was probably, I don't know, 10 or 11.

[Genevieve]

I just looked pissed.

[Luke Burbank]

Who knows what had gone down. But that's, you know, they should that they should have slipped me a drink. I probably would have been in a much better mood.

[Genevieve]

You said your sisters were beaming. Maybe you should have been gym beaming.

[Luke Burbank]

Exactly. Didn't you have a story about Christmas that you wanted to share?

[Genevieve]

Well, I don't know if I did want to share it. That's kind of the thing. Like I had something ready to go.

[Luke Burbank]

If we need to Christmas miracle to talk about.

[Genevieve]

All right, well, I only talk about your Christmas miracle. Then we'll decide if we need to get into My sordid Christmas passed.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, I was concerned, Andrew, that I was tonight as of a few days ago. I was, I was worried that I would not worried. I thought it was a probably unavoidable that I was going to be once again as I did last year, Andrew on Christmas night. So tonight going to Sea Tac airport to get on an airplane to fly to Frankfurt, Germany for one day and fly back to get my dingus airline miles that I so crave. Because this year, if you'll believe it, I'm actually approaching, I'm getting close to having flown 100,000 miles which is the highest level you can be at. Old Alaska Airlines, they used to 75k used to be the top and then they made 100k the top. And now, now I can't, I, you know, I can't be a second class citizen to those hundred k people since I'm at like 91k for the year. So I was like doing all of this research and I was in close consultation with our friend Broadcast Barry who is the absolute oracle on these things. And I was going on all these different websites and I was trying to find basically an airline that associates itself with Alaska Airlines. That is, I get the miles that I could fly somewhere really far away but for not that much money and ideally in first class. Because if I'm gonna do a crazy trip like this, the only way that it's survivable is if at least I'm in a really comfortable seat where I can like lay down or something.

[Genevieve]

Because essentially you're not booking a trip, you're booking. Well, I mean I guess you're booking. Yeah, you're booking basically like 20 to 30 hours on an airplane with maybe punctuated by a seven hour break on the ground.

[Luke Burbank]

Precisely. It's referred to in the industry and by industry I mean people like Me, who sacrificed all level of their personal life to have airline status. It's called a mileage run and people do it all the time. I've been on planes with people that are doing it. I'm like, oh, hey, what are you doing in New York? Nothing. Turning around the other. I'm getting off and I'm walking to a different, you know, terminal and I'm getting on a different flight and I'm flying home.

[Genevieve]

Hey, I'm flying here. That's what they say.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, it's like again, it's a very, very sad state of affairs. But also I will say I don't regret doing it last year because it was the reason that I was able to be at this. I was gold 75k last year, which was still enough that I get to pick what seat I'm going to be in and I don't have to pay for bags and things like that. Here's the thing. If you go to 100k, you can bestow MVP gold status on one other person. Andrew, what a. What kind of a weird demented are you giving your situation has Alaska rot?

[Genevieve]

Are you. I'm sorry to cut you off. Are you giving up yours or you're. You're just like you. You get one and then you get one to give away you but you're.

[Luke Burbank]

Not giving away the same level. So if you get to one. Here are the things you get if you get to this again, if you are willing to basically abandon everything that's important in life so as to be mostly in airports and on airplanes and you get to this number of 100000 miles flown in a year, you are 100K. You're like the highest thing that you can be with Alaska Airlines. It means you're gonna very likely get upgraded if there are any available seats on the plane, like in the first class. But you also get a. Like a magic wand. I don't know if it's really a wand of MVP gold status. Now. What that is is like not the top, but it's better than nothing. It gets you free luggage, it gets you a free bag check and all that. And it gets you maybe some upgrades here and there. It's a lot better than not having it. And they give you one to bestow on any other person that you want.

[Genevieve]

Well, I mean, I was just gonna say that I think you've been very fun lately and funny and you actually like.

[Luke Burbank]

Boy, it really catches in your throat, doesn't it?

[Genevieve]

Kind of handsome too. You've been looking Good. Your eye thing is cleared up. We haven't talked about that in a while. So, like, yeah, I mean, so you're probably thinking, like, where. Where would I bestow this?

[Luke Burbank]

I'm. I am, of course, bestowing it upon Becca, if I get it, if I. If this whole thing works out. But. So I was going back and forth because again, it's. It's. When you say it out loud, it's. It just as my friend Tom Beaudet used to say, it really sounds like what it is, which is a ridiculous thing to fly to another continent and then back just so you can board the airplane first leg for the next calendar year. And I thought, why don't I just. Why don't I just give them a ring over there at old Alaska Airlines? And I found out that I can just pay some money for the last 9,000 miles.

[Genevieve]

Oh, I think I've heard of this. Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

And just round it up. They're called EQMs, and I'll let that. Or I can even use miles that I have, like, in my account. I can pay for it with my. This is where it gets complicated. I have airline miles. I can use them to buy these other special kind of miles. And what that does is gets me to this number that I want to get to, which is 100k. You also get a free lounge membership all year, which is like 500 bucks. It's like, that's a pretty good deal. So. Well, I called up and the woman was very helpful, and she said, oh, yeah, you know, you can just by these miles. And it's much less than, like, a ticket to Germany, and I don't have to go on an airplane to Germany. And it is. It's a. It's a. It's a steal of a deal, Andrew. It's a Christmas miracle. I don't have to. I don't have to fly anywhere tonight. I'm going to be able to get. Get to my goal.

[Genevieve]

I am pretty sure. Obviously, I don't play around in these spaces. I am pretty sure I've heard of EQM, though. Isn't Bel Biv DeVoe playing at the EQM casino?

[Luke Burbank]

I think maybe the biggest and best in the Northwest.

[Genevieve]

Here's one thing about the EQC Casino. Thank you for bringing it up. That drives me crazy. In their commercials, they do brand themselves as the biggest and best in the Northwest. Right. But they have some commercials. I don't know which ones. They advertise a lot on sports radio, of course, about upcoming events happening at the eqc or if you just want to. You know, they also have ads that are just like, about going and spending a weekend there. Come play, stay and play. Come play and stay. But they. They've now switched to saying, come and find out why they call it the biggest and best in the Northwest. I'm like, they don't. Dude, you do. They call it that because you sat down. It's like. It's like giving yourself a nickname and then being like, that's why they call me the Fisher Cat. They don't call you the Fisher Cat, Andrew. You decided to start calling yourself the Fisher Cat. So that's my. That's my holiday beef.

[Luke Burbank]

Andrew, if you knew that Tom Segura was coming to the EQC or even that.

[Genevieve]

Did you.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, would you be talking this way if you knew that Danny Vernon was coming to the EQC with the Illusion of Elvis? You can celebrate Elvis's birthday with Danny Version's Illusion of Elvis tribute show at the EQC Event Center.

[Genevieve]

Is that actually magic and Elvis impersonation, the illusion?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, that's where I think it's. It doesn't say anything about magic, which is kind of. I think you shouldn't put illusion in there unless you're going to be doing. I don't think it says experience. All three iconic eras of Elvis. The 50s Hillbilly Cat, the 60s movie years, and the legendary 70s jumpsuit era. @ no point does it actually describe him doing magic tricks, though, which, again, I think Illusion of Elvis is a misleading name for your act. I would be expecting to see somebody get cut in half.

[Genevieve]

Would you believe that? I have Danny Vernon's cell phone number right now. It is prominent on his website. We could call him on Christmas. That might be a little bit rude, but on the website you can contact him via a cell. You can call or text directly to book him. And I am seeing nothing related to magic as well. It does say that he wanted to. He wanted to celebrate the various stages of Elvis's career. So you can like kind of choose, as I believe you were just saying a moment ago, like, which, which. Which version of Elvis do you remember? The big Elvis stamp, like, debate of the, oh, early 90s.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I listened to actually a really great episode of, I want to say 99. Indivisible about that, about the whole story on that, which was pretty wild. It was coming down to the particular Elvis that they chose and what the very, very strong feelings about which depiction of Elvis was going to be chosen for it.

[Genevieve]

I Had I had not heard that. I just have memories of it from the time. I think they went with a younger Elvis. Right. I think it was a brilliant. Tell me, you know, you. If you heard that recently, you'll have more info on this. This is just my, like, sort of vague, foggy memory of this. But, like, first of all, it feels like kind of an early example of really, in this. In this case, it was kind of the government because it was the US Postal Service, but still, like, of a company really getting great engagement from people before the Internet, you know, like, I mean, I don't know how many stories like that exist before the Internet, you know, Like, I feel like so many brands have tried to recreate that, like, to varying degrees of absurdity, like left Twix and right Twix or like, whatever, like trying to create this sort of false dichotomy. But in this.

[Luke Burbank]

Or.

[Genevieve]

I think Monopoly would do that a lot over the years. Like, you know, we're going to get rid of one Monopoly piece. What are you gonna vote off the island? And what should we vote in? Of course, it's a cat. Like, but the US Postal Service nailed that back. And again, I'm gonna say kind of early 90s and 92. And they went with the. I believe they went with what they were calling the young Elvis. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. It was considered kind of controversial at the time because commemorative stamps had never been used on, like, pop culture figures. Oh, and also Elvis, you know, had, you know, battled drug issues and things that. So there were some people that thought it wasn't fitting to put him on a stamp. And then there was just the question of, like, which version of Elvis are we going to depict? And you're right, they went with young Elvis. I'm in a subreddit about this whole thing right now. And somebody called no bread fruit, 1849, says, this explains the line in Futurama. If they put me on a stamp, tell them to use the young Bender.

[Genevieve]

That's only funny. Like, if, you know Bender. Like, you know Bender. Yeah. There's a. I didn't know that was ending with Bender. That definitely. That reminds me, I was at the post office recently, and it was leading up to the holiday times. I'm gonna say this was maybe early December and I was doing TBTL business there. I do a lot of my business out of the post office these days. And I heard somebody up at the counter in front of me. It's pretty long line this day. And I heard a fellow say, yes, I'd like a Book of stamps. Do you have any Betty White stamps? And the woman said, no, we're all out. And he seemed so disappointed. He's like, I don't know, then give me whatever. Yeah, I think I, you know, we should double check that. I'm pretty sure I heard him say Betty White stamp.

[Luke Burbank]

I believe it. I mean, listen, the demo of people who love Betty White and who are still mailing male, you know, that needs a stamp. It's probably a fairly big overlap. By the way, it was 99% invisible. The episode was, you ain't nothing but a postmark.

[Genevieve]

That's really great. Oh, that's really good. By the way.

[Luke Burbank]

Highly recommend, folks, check that out if you want to know more about the Elvis stamp.

[Genevieve]

Apparently the Betty White stamps are not coming out until 2025. I thought that pretty quick turnaround because she has. She passed away not all that long ago, but I see that it was NPR wrote about this in November, kind of mid to late November, that they're going to have this Betty White stamp. So this person probably heard about the Betty White stamp on the radio or in the news somewhere and was excited about it, but didn't get the details that they weren't released yet.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, maybe they can bide their time by seeing the Giggly Squad live at the EQC on Thursday, March 6. Laugh along with Hannah Berner and Paige Desorbo as they bring their hit podcast to the stage at the EQC Event Center. Andrew from relationships and horoscopes to TV and personal stories, these two keep it real, raw and hilarious. Have we ever been described as real, raw or hilarious? Have any of those words ever been used to describe our podcast?

[Genevieve]

People have described my nerves as being raw before, but that's, I, I think that's about it for me.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, the fact that there is a podcast I've never heard of that is successful enough that it can play what I assume is a fairly large room at the eqc. And that that will never be us is, you know, it's a lot to take in here on Christmas Day. Andrew.

[Genevieve]

Well, do you think they ever played the Friends center in Philadelphia? Probably not. I think we have our own special thing going on.

[Luke Burbank]

We sure do. And that was a wonderful, wonderful night that I'll never forget. So yeah, take that, Club Giggly. Thank you for being a tam. Talk about a gift, Andrew. Talk about something under the tree. These folks whose names I'm about to read are they're giving TBT all their hard earned money every month or maybe In a lump sum at the beginning of the year. They are supporting the show and, and it's, it's, it's an amazing thing and it's the only way that we could do this day in and day out, including here on this actual Christmas day. We're talking about Aaron Irkinswick of Las Vegas, Nevada.

[Genevieve]

Nice. Christmas in Vegas.

[Luke Burbank]

Love it. I'm gonna be down there in the springtime in like the month of May.

[Genevieve]

To go probably, right?

[Luke Burbank]

I think so. Yeah. I've already got, I've already got my, my stuff booked. It's the, it's around my birthday, but it's actually like Becca's sister in law's birthday. So everybody's getting together down there. Maybe we'll bump into Aaron.

[Genevieve]

Are you thinking already about how, I mean, your life has changed a lot probably since the last time you went to Vegas to really party hardy with the party hardy gang. And we know that you have, you know, gone pretty hard in Vegas before. Are you thinking about like going there with kind of a different group of people with different expectations of what a Vegas weekend looks like?

[Luke Burbank]

Like, yeah, but you know, I've actually been to Vegas with these folks in the last like maybe seven, eight months.

[Genevieve]

Oh, I didn't.

[Luke Burbank]

And you know, it was, it was really interesting because I had a lot of fun and I didn't go crazy. I didn't, you know, like do my, my previous thing, which would be to just literally drink and gamble, you know, for a, basically like a three day bender. Practically have them use the young bender when they're depicting me on the stamp. But, but it was, it was really fun. Like it was a, you know, Becca and I went for some runs in the morning, which is kind of anathema, it would seem to Vegas life. But I actually really, I enjoyed my time there in a way that I didn't expect to because I kind of thought, well, if I'm gonna be here and I'm not just like loaded the whole time, what even is the point? But it was fun, right? Father, his eggnog smells funny. Please confiscate that. He's trying to transubstantiate that into something.

[Genevieve]

Sir eggnog cannot be transubstantiated.

[Luke Burbank]

But no, I mean, I actually had a, I had a fun time and it was nice to keep things kind of like within reason, like getting some sleep at night. And I mean, I did have a few drinks. It wasn't like I was, you know, completely on the wagon, but it just was not, it wasn't the Way it was in my twenties with the, with Toon and the mummy and I. This has just got to be part of, you know, the aging process, I guess. But it was really fun and it was kind of nice to. It was nice to like we, you know, Beck and I going and getting, you know, some breakfast or whatever. Having some brunch at like 10 in the morning and feeling like pretty good, like that was an unthinkable thing in my previous Vegas trips. Aaron knows what I'm talking about.

[Genevieve]

Yeah. Thank you, Aaron. We do appreciate it.

[Luke Burbank]

It thanks to Lauren Realberg of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania.

[Genevieve]

I'm gonna punctuate everybody's name with this slightly too long Jingle Bells.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, this is great. Let's just get in the mood here. Keeping it real Berg in Philadelphia, Penns. Lauren, we thank you, Philly.

[Genevieve]

Thank you, Lauren.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, speaking of the Friends Center.

[Genevieve]

That's right, the giggle squad.

[Luke Burbank]

Been to Philly lately? I don't think so.

[Genevieve]

Doubt it.

[Luke Burbank]

Thanks to Luke Waters of Seattle, Washington. What a name. Waters.

[Genevieve]

Waters, like Roger.

[Luke Burbank]

Thanks, Luke.

[Genevieve]

I've heard that. Roger Waters. Well, you gotta wait for the bells to end before we thank anybody else.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm just. I didn't have a lot to learn.

[Genevieve]

I'm not, I'm not going to compare Luke to Roger Waters because I've learned very recently that Roger Waters, questionable takes, problematic person. Didn't realize that Luke is not though. The only problem with Luke is that his family found out he's donating to tbtl. But we'll get, we'll get around that, Luke. I promise.

[Luke Burbank]

Nobody has to know. It can be our little secret, Luke. You know, I work with a cameraman for CBS in la. He is a guy named Luke and he's an Aussie and he is devastatingly handsome. And every time I see him, because we're on a lot of shoots together, I'm always like, hey, cute Luke. He's like, he should be the correspondent. There's two guys that fit this bill. There's a producer named Richard Budenhagen who looks like James Brolin.

[Genevieve]

Oh, wow. Oh.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, when I'm out on a shoot with him, it's like he's 64 and looks like James Brolin. And then I'm like, hello. It's like, who is the camera supposed to be pointing at right now? And then the other one is Cute Luke, the Aussie. So anyway, wait, I think I'm confusing.

[Genevieve]

Josh Brolin with James Brolin. Who's James?

[Luke Burbank]

James Brolin's the dad.

[Genevieve]

Oh, I didn't know that he had a dad. I mean, everybody's got a dad, but I.

[Luke Burbank]

He has a dad who is a famous actor.

[Genevieve]

Oh, I see. Okay. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

But a real silver fox. I think he might be married to, or he's in a relationship with Barbra Streisand. And I'm gonna tell you something that you don't care about, Andrew, but this is a Christmas gift to some of the listeners who do care about it. You know the Aerosmith song Don't. I don't know what the name of the song is, but it's the. I don't want to close my eyes don't want to fall asleep Because I miss you, babe Because I don't want to miss a thing don't want to miss a thing. Yeah, there you go. You know it.

[Genevieve]

At first, I had no idea what you're talking about until that last line.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Even when I dream of you the sweetest dreams will never do us do. Okay, so anyway, I think that might have been in the movie. One of those movies where they're going to a space rock to save humanity.

[Genevieve]

Oh, okay.

[Luke Burbank]

Sure.

[Genevieve]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Might have been.

[Genevieve]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

But that song is written about something James Brolin said to Barbra Streisand. Barbra Streisand was doing an interview somewhere with some TV network, and she was talking about how in love with James Brolin she was and how he had said to her, I don't want to fall asleep because I'm gonna miss you when I'm asleep.

[Genevieve]

Oh, how romantic.

[Luke Burbank]

And the writer, Diane Warren, the writer of songs, Diane Warren, saw this interview and then wrote that song that Aerosmith ended up performing.

[Genevieve]

Really?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Genevieve]

Thank you.

[Luke Burbank]

And you know who really loves that story? Malia Matic of Everett, Washington.

[Genevieve]

Thank you, Malia, for donating and for giving Luke a better response to that story than I gave him. I think you have mentioned that to me before, but I never remember the details. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Also thanks to Camion Guyer of Belfair Washington Bell Fair.

[Genevieve]

I got some fair bells right here.

[Luke Burbank]

Belair. Belfair is beautiful. That's near where my sister Hannah lives.

[Genevieve]

Nice. Well, thank you, Camion.

[Luke Burbank]

Thanks, Camion. And then thanks. Oh, come on.

[Genevieve]

You're pale.

[Luke Burbank]

Leah Chiarelli, Shoreline, WA. One time Howler Lake Christian Preschool, co classmate of mine.

[Genevieve]

Nice.

[Luke Burbank]

My dear friend, Leah Chiarelli. Hey, Leah. Thank you. I love seeing your name on this list. It's really appreciated.

[Genevieve]

Yes. Thank you to everybody. And say hi to.

[Luke Burbank]

Is anybody from your Kinder. Is anybody from your preschool donating? Andrew.

[Genevieve]

Let me. Let Me should have been a little cooler in preschool. You know what? I should have been a lot cooler in preschool.

[Luke Burbank]

Dude. I must have been the most uncool kid in that preschool. Like, when I think about the. The getups that my mom was probably putting me in, which I probably didn't have the wherewithal to push back on. I mean, 100% hand me down. I'm sure. 100% kooky. Had crazy hair that my dad cut. I didn't get to go to a, like, a professional cut haircutter. I had like a bowl cut. I think that was the kind of haircut my dad knew how to do.

[Genevieve]

But you went to preschool, though. Not first grade, but you did go to preschool.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, I think this Howler Lake thing was even like. Yeah, it was like it was preschool. So it wasn't even kindergarten yet. And I did. I did kindergarten, but I did it at a weird kindergarten called Pillar of Fire. Then I didn't do first grade.

[Genevieve]

The fact that you call it Pillar of Fire makes me know that this is a weird kindergarten. Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

It was a hell of a place.

[Genevieve]

But anyway, I didn't do preschool. I didn't have that experience.

[Luke Burbank]

You didn't do preschool?

[Genevieve]

No. It's probably why you're more educated than me. That's why you use those big words. Do you see that? That's a. That's one of the questions on the hey Dummies. You know what? I think I might even. We have a list of questions from listeners that we answer for our hey Dummies video series. And one of them. Sometimes they're just thrown out to both of us. Sometimes they're specifically for one of us. And this one was. Hey, Luke, can you tell us. It's on the list. Maybe you'll answer it. I'm paraphrasing. Hey, Luke, can you tell us how you develop such a big vocabulary or such a large vocabulary?

[Luke Burbank]

I needed. I haven't checked the list lately, but I. I am liking that question.

[Genevieve]

Yeah, I was hoping you'd use a bigger word there than like, Andrew.

[Luke Burbank]

I've assessed that. That is a very good question.

[Genevieve]

But I just thought it was really interesting that that one was not like thrown to both of us, but just you. So just you and your big ass vocab. Merry Christmas.

[Luke Burbank]

Thank you. Yes. And a happy New year. Thank you to all of our donors today for making the show possible. Thank you to everyone for listening on this Christmas Day. I hope you're wherever you are. If you're catch this on actual Christmas Day. You're having a nice time. You're getting to spend it with some folks that you love and that you're feeling good. On this 25th of December, we are going to be right back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for you. What I was thinking we should do, Andrew, is and we'll talk about this on the show tomorrow. But like as we are kind of rounding the corner towards the end of 2024 and going into the new year, there's a lot of top stories that we didn't get to in 2024. People know this. If you've listened to the show, it's almost a bit now. So we, we should revisit some of those top stories that we didn't get to and get to them.

[Genevieve]

Yes, we should. And I also have a question because I'm the one who always saves our old show sheets. And so I shared a document with you I've been going through and I want to know what that experience has been like. And if I'm in trouble, we'll talk.

[Luke Burbank]

About it on the show tomorrow. So we'll see all of you for that. In the meantime, time, have a great holiday. Enjoy. Enjoy yourself. Is that what they say? And please remember, no mountain too tall.

[Genevieve]

And enjoy yourself to all and just enjoy yourself.

[Andrew Walsh]

Power out.