#4403 Just Some Barry That I Used To Know

Summary

Podcast Summary: TBTL Episode #4403 - "Just Some Barry That I Used To Know"

Release Date: February 14, 2025

Hosts: Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh
Podcast: TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live
Description: Hosted by two longtime friends, TBTL is a daily show where Luke and Andrew navigate the world with humor and camaraderie, tackling a range of topics from film reviews to quirky personal anecdotes.

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1. Opening Banter and Introduction (00:01 - 01:57)

The episode kicks off with playful banter between Luke and Andrew about Sir Lloyd Wilson Webber's "Rap the Musical." Their humorous exchange sets the tone for the episode, highlighting their chemistry and lighthearted approach.

• Andrew Walsh (00:01): "Give me that big booming bass in your face that booming bass."
• Luke Burbank (00:18): "Rap the Musical contains no rap music. I'll go in on a drive by just me posse and me."

They segue into the main agenda, teasing a wild and crazy Valentine’s Day story involving a snake incident.

2. Flight Seating Dilemmas and Travel Tales (01:58 - 10:57)

Seat Selection Anxiety: Luke shares his struggle with selecting a seat on a long-haul flight from London to Portland. Torn between an aisle and window seat in "Bad Coach," he expresses anxiety over potential discomfort and limited legroom.

• Luke Burbank (04:35): "I am bedeviled. And I'm bamboozled. Not bamboozled."

Audio Drop Discussion: Andrew addresses an audio issue from a previous episode, explaining the technical adjustments made to enhance listener experience.

• Andrew Walsh (02:59): "I do a decent amount of gentle compression and then normalizing and then something called hard limiting."

Personal Travel Experiences: Andrew reminisces about his first long flight to Australia and contrasts it with his current travel experiences, emphasizing the psychological challenges of lengthy journeys.

• Andrew Walsh (11:03): "Things got things in my... that was my first really long flight that was quite uncomfortable."

3. Navigating Gift-Giving Pressures During Holidays (10:58 - 44:39)

Stress of Holiday Gift-Giving: Luke and Andrew delve into the emotional and financial pressures associated with gift-giving during the holiday season. Luke discusses his difficulty in simplifying gift exchanges, often culminating in last-minute expensive purchases.

• Luke Burbank (22:50): "How about we order some Thai food? You know?"

Andrew’s Perspective on Simplifying Gifts: Andrew shares his approach to reducing gift-related stress by limiting formal exchanges and focusing on thoughtful, non-material gestures.

• Andrew Walsh (23:00): "We float the idea of, do you want to skip presents this year?"

Family Dynamics and Personal Anecdotes: Both hosts recount personal stories about past gift-giving experiences that highlight familial expectations and misunderstandings. Luke narrates an incident where a gift he gave his father was initially received poorly but later became a cherished item.

• Andrew Walsh (28:44): "It's kind of cool."
• Luke Burbank (28:33): "My dad now still has that in a place of honor in his home office."

4. Listener Interaction: Voicemail on Splitting Expenses (44:39 - 57:46)

Voicemail Summary: A listener named Jonathan from Chicago shares a scenario where friends dispute the fair split of car rental expenses during a trip. The conversation explores the nuances of equitable cost-sharing among groups, especially when couples are involved.

• Listener Jonathan (45:19 - 47:06): Describes a situation where a friend disputes the division of car rental costs, arguing based on the number of people versus household units.

Hosts' Insights: Andrew and Luke discuss the importance of clear communication and upfront agreements to prevent misunderstandings in shared financial responsibilities during group travels.

• Andrew Walsh (47:55): "All I would just never make an issue of it one way or the other."
• Luke Burbank (57:46): "It's better to be really clear about the... Here's what we're gonna..."

5. Acknowledging Donors and Supporters (57:46 - 64:30)

The hosts take a moment to thank their listeners and supporters who contribute financially to keep the show running. Specific mentions include Mark Jeffrey from Chisago City, Minnesota, and other dedicated listeners from various locations.

• Luke Burbank (60:29): "Thank you, Megan Raqueta of Houston, Texas."
• Andrew Walsh (63:39): "Thank you, Rosemary."

6. Closing Remarks and Teasers for Future Episodes (64:30 - End)

Upcoming Content: Luke hints at continuing the untold story of the snake incident in future episodes, maintaining suspense and listener interest.

• Luke Burbank (64:30): "We'll see how the jet lag be lagging."

Final Banter: The episode concludes with humorous exchanges about movie ratings and personal anecdotes, reinforcing the hosts' friendly rapport.

• Andrew Walsh (67:09): "Let me know what you think."
• Luke Burbank (67:16): "It's the movie about the soul."

Farewell: The hosts bid farewell, reminding listeners to tune in next week and share their well-wishes.

• Luke Burbank (67:47): "Have a great weekend. Take care of yourselves."

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Key Takeaways and Insights

• Navigating Personal Anxiety in Public Settings: Luke's detailed account of seat selection reflects common anxieties about comfort and control during travel.

• Balancing Generosity and Financial Prudence: Both hosts explore the delicate balance between being generous with friends and managing personal finances, especially in group settings.

• Importance of Clear Communication: The discussion on splitting expenses underscores the necessity of upfront agreements to maintain harmony in friendships and group activities.

• Evolving Gift-Giving Practices: Andrew’s approach to minimizing traditional gift exchanges points to a broader trend of valuing experiences and thoughtfulness over material gifts.

• Community and Support: Acknowledging donors highlights the importance of listener support in sustaining independent podcasts.

Notable Quotes

• On Seat Selection Anxiety:

  • Luke Burbank (04:35): "I am bedeviled. And I'm bamboozled."

• On Gift-Giving Pressures:

  • Luke Burbank (22:50): "How about we order some Thai food? You know?"

• On Clear Communication:

  • Andrew Walsh (47:55): "All I would just never make an issue of it one way or the other."

• On Balancing Generosity:

  • Andrew Walsh (56:20): "I want to be the opposite of that behavior. It inspires me to be more generous."

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Conclusion: Episode #4403 of TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live offers a blend of humor, personal stories, and relatable discussions on travel anxieties and the complexities of gift-giving. Luke and Andrew's authentic conversations provide listeners with both entertainment and insightful reflections on maintaining relationships and personal well-being amidst societal pressures.

Transcript

[Andrew Walsh]

Coming to the Greenwich Civic Centre from London's West End, Sir Lloyd Wilson Webber's Rap the Musical. Just give me that big booming bass in your face that booming bass. Give me that stupid fat rhyme every time.

[Luke Burbank]

Describe a crime Rap the Musical contains no rap music. I'll go in on a drive by just me posse and me.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm a gangster of the old school.

[Luke Burbank]

You can call me OG the musical the fun of rap without all that rap.

[Andrew Walsh]

Tbtl tbtl. You guys are so fun, just relentlessly fun. I keep thinking, when are they gonna stop being fun?

[Luke Burbank]

And the answer is never being like that in Hollywood.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's easy. Tall, handsome, that's easy.

[Luke Burbank]

Be short, fat and smell like Doritos.

[Andrew Walsh]

And try to make it Hollywood. You don't have to make rude noises. That's all right, I don't mind.

[Luke Burbank]

I believe it was Benjamin Franklin who said, you have reached the end of your free trial [e-mail].

[Andrew Walsh]

What a wise man. What's on the agenda, my friend? All right.

[Luke Burbank]

Hello, good morning and welcome, everyone, to a Friday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

[Andrew Walsh]

This song goes out to all the coffee lovers of the world.

[Luke Burbank]

My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host, Grumpy, pardon the term. Coming to you for the final time from London's West End on this Valentine's Day. Happy Valentine's Day, everybody.

[Andrew Walsh]

What a fun, sexy time for you.

[Luke Burbank]

Got a great show in store for you. It's episode 4403 in a collector series.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let the fun begin.

[Luke Burbank]

A great show that features a wild story, a crazy story.

[Andrew Walsh]

I am petrified.

[Luke Burbank]

Petrified with this story of the time a snake fell out of the clear blue sky and landed on a lady.

[Andrew Walsh]

My motto is to catch a snake, become a snake, think like a snake and be a snake.

[Luke Burbank]

And then what happened next will truly shock you. It's a valentine story for the ages and we'll share it with you coming up. Plus we'll talk to this guy. Longest running cobra of the show. May be best known for his depictions of the tall ships and his love for this audio drop. He's Andrew Walsh and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

[Andrew Walsh]

Good morning. You kind of wrangled that audio drop. It seems like it's in a better, better place now. It's less loud, it's less loudly.

[Luke Burbank]

Did you fix it? Importantly, did you fix it in post the other day when I was playing it and it was like. Because you know that's something that really lives with me is when I play an audio drop, and it's. It's annoying when it's too quiet, but it's. It's upsetting when it's too loud. Like, I don't want people walking around their lives listening to this potentially in headphones and then have something blaring. Did you get a chance to go back and fix it?

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, that's why I was called it out in the moment. Not to make you feel insecure about your audio, but only because I was concerned in the repetition of it that it might be bothersome to some listeners. Having said that, I didn't go back specifically and look for that part of the show and fix it, but I do a decent amount of gentle compression and then normalizing and then something called hard limiting. It's a whole process. I can make a whole.

[Luke Burbank]

Is that something in our friendship or something related to the audio of the show?

[Andrew Walsh]

You know what, Luke? I'm gonna hard limit that question right now.

[Luke Burbank]

I could totally hear that becoming a thing.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's a hard limit for me, dog. But anyway, yeah, so I am guessing that it was sort of mitigated through that audio process. But to your point, I don't even remember what show it was on anymore, and I don't remember going back and actually manually addressing that issue. So I hope was okay for everybody.

[Luke Burbank]

I am loving England, my friend. I am loving London. But I'm also loving the idea of being home, which I guess is a good thing, right? Like, I'm looking forward to sleeping in my own bed, But I am absolutely. I am bedeviled. And I'm bamboozled. Not bamboozled. I cannot decide what seat in Coach I should be selecting. I keep going back. I keep obsessively moving my seats. I could be on the window with potentially nobody in between me and the aisle person. That's where I've been for most of this waiting period. But then I realized there is a front row. It's not the front row of Coach. See, there's two different kinds of coach on British Airways, by the way.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can I interrupt for one second just to ask, please, is this a giant plane that has the middle section as well? And are there five seats in the middle section or three?

[Luke Burbank]

I would have to look at the app, but I want to say there's more. I think there's probably five.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay. And there's three along the sides, too. So. Okay, That's. That gives me a good.

[Luke Burbank]

Actually, there might be. There's two on the side. Oh yeah, there's three on the side. You're right because you said there would be aisle middlewooning. As of right now. If I go in there, I could be in. Well, here's the thing that's really got me. It's got me shook. It's got me twisted, it's got me tumbling. What does Fergie say? You got me twisting, tumbling. I don't know.

[Andrew Walsh]

That.

[Luke Burbank]

Something bumbling.

[Andrew Walsh]

I haven't gotten to that song in love with you.

[Luke Burbank]

It's actually a very catchy song that I know none of the lyrics of.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's on my list.

[Luke Burbank]

I think she says Tottenham Circle at some point in the song. Anyway, when I flew out here on British Airways, they put me up in like slightly better coach just because I have some sort of status. I'm an emerald with them because of the Alaska Airlines stuff. And so what I. The flight out wasn't too bad because I was in that middle. I was on the aisle of that middle section, but I was in the exit row. So there was. I did not have somebody in front of me leaning their chair back. I had a little extra legroom and I really enjoyed that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Great.

[Luke Burbank]

But I have not been upgraded to the better coach yet. I'm in bad coach and I went back to use the restroom in bad coach. It's bad, Andrew. It's bad back there. That's where I'm currently scheduled to be.

[Andrew Walsh]

The graffiti in the bathroom wall, did it say something?

[Luke Burbank]

I got menaced by a couple kids with a boombox.

[Andrew Walsh]

Some come here to sit and think.

[Luke Burbank]

Here I sit, broken hearted, paid my diamond, only farted and other such dirty things I saw written in the bathroom walls as a kid. It's bad back there. And this is a longer flight. Angel, we're not changing planes. It's London to Portland. So It's. It's a 10 plus hour flight. Both of the flights I took were in the five to six hour range to get out here. So I just have. I have more questions than answers. One, should I choose that? I could be on the. Right now. Here's where I am right now. I am on the aisle seat of that weird middle cluster at the front of bad coach.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right now. You're at the mid. Okay, the aisle.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm in the same seat that I flew out on, except I'm one whole section further back in the plane, if that makes sense. Like I'm in the same kind of seat. But I don't know if there's a big difference between the bad coach that I'm in and the good coach that I was in flying out. So what I'm concerned. The reason I don't want to stick with the window seat, which is normally my thing, is because if it's really cramped, I would just hate to be really cramped for 10 hours, whereas I think there's a better chance I won't be cramped if I'm in this. But I'm now basically the aisle seat of the middle chunk of the front row of bad coach. What I really wish they would do for all this augmented reality for all these Pokemons were training somebody. Augment my reality into that British Airways flight. Let me walk around, let me kick the tires, let me figure out what the best call is because my heart says window so I can lean against the wall so I can nap a little bit. Nobody between. Nobody in the middle seat between me and the aisle person. But I do have to ask them to get up for me to use the restroom, which I'm less shy about than you are. But also this front row of bad coach might. It might be. It might not provide much relief. I don't know what I'm dealing with. And there's going to be 10 hours flying home where I'm going to have to deal with the consequences of my decision. And it's paralyzing me.

[Andrew Walsh]

I got to be honest with you, when you brought up Pokemon, I was like, what if. Did I space out for a second because I have some concentration? I was like, pokemon, what are you bringing? We're training Pokemon. And then Luke, it totally made sense. I totally understand what you mean. Why aren't we using augmented reality? Like when you go to buy a ticket at a Mariners game now, I think especially if you're buying it from like one of the third party sellers or whatever, which I mostly don't do. Like, I'm just too old and tired to try to navigate the modern ticket. Like, you know, third party platform market. I think it's all bullshit. I think it's just a way for people to sell tickets and line their pockets twice. The whole thing irritates me. I just go to Mariners.com/tickets. I don't think that's a thing. Don't nobody take my word on that. I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

Second baseman back slash slash Ryan. Slash Ryan.

[Andrew Walsh]

Bliss.

[Luke Burbank]

Platoon backslash, win above, replacement backslash.

[Andrew Walsh]

WRC plus. All right, what I can say was, when you're picking a seat at a stadium now, a lot of these services will sort of show you, like, this is exactly what Your view will be, you know, and you can sort of like. I don't know if you can move the camera around, like, to your left, to your right. Is there a kid eating peanuts? I don't know. But, like, it'll at least show you, like, this is what your experience is going to be. And I think that's pretty cool. I think that that would be helpful on planes, except I don't trust them to be fully honest. Like, I need them to, Like, I need them to recreate the experience of somebody's seat jamming into my knees and trying to make my femur shorter than they are for. For 10 hours.

[Luke Burbank]

I guess I'm going to stick with the current plan. Yeah. Oculus Rift, this, please. I think I'm going to stick with my plan of the front row of coach. I think that the not having anyone leaning back on me is going to be the. It's going to be more important to me than the fact that I can't look out the window because most of it's the Atlantic Ocean anyway. I can't look out the window, and. Which is the downside of this aisle thingy. But. And I am. There are people in the seats next to me, so I don't know what that stat. You know, what they're going to be like, but basically, I think not having a seat recline into me, that would be a really. If I realized that, like, bad coach has, like, minimal leg room and someone's leaning back on me, and now I got to do this for 10 hours in this window seat, that'd be a really. That'd be a bad thing to figure out. You know, as we're pulling out of Heathrow.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can I be honest with you?

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew Walsh]

Good. I feel like honesty is important when we do this show.

[Luke Burbank]

Mm.

[Andrew Walsh]

I've taken a few really long flights now. The one to Australia with you was my first really long flight, and it was really long. And things got things in my. That was a pretty comfortable flight. Like, nobody was leaning back on us. We had an empty seat between us. It was pretty ideal.

[Luke Burbank]

We had the only empty seat on the aeroplane.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's right between both there and back.

[Luke Burbank]

Which was either a miracle or somebody at Qantas was trying to hook us up or.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, there was somebody there originally between the two of us. And I started telling them about my dreams, and I think that they jumped off the airplane.

[Luke Burbank]

They did. They did. So I swam home.

[Andrew Walsh]

But I will say that. So we were lucky then. But the trip to Croatia, and I can't Remember exactly what my flight pattern was or where I stopped first. Was it Iceland? Whatever. All I know is the first really, really, really long flight was really rough for me. It was, I think I had aisle but I had the person in front of me reclining back. Like it was the first time I took a really long flight that was quite uncomfortable. But I bring all this up to say something does happen around the seven hour mark or something where you sort of stop everything. You stop measuring things based on the game slows down, the game slows down or maybe it speeds up, I don't know. Like you're just like in a different headspace and like you don't even know what is what anymore. Do you have legs? Are these my legs? Are these my arms? Like everybody, you're just miserable, just want to get off the plane. But actually the misery almost takes a backseat. It's kind of like, it's almost like you just kind of get into a weird headspace. So that's why my advice to you is to yes, pick the best seat possible. But to me, for a 10 hour flight, the biggest decisions you can make are your media choices. And maybe you and I just see things differently. And we do on many, many things. Politics first and foremost.

[Luke Burbank]

I've got the One America app downloaded.

[Andrew Walsh]

On my laptop, if that's what you know. But like I know that you love your tiki talkies and you can scroll endlessly for a long time and if that passes time, that's great. I feel like scrolling for me only passes so much time before I start to get that like, I think Chris Hayes described it as almost a car sicky sort of feeling. And I know that I've gotten that in the past. I feel like for a 10 hour flight you want to have some full length feature backups and I think that you should. I don't know if you have to download these or download the apps that you're subscribed to like Netflix or whatever in order to watch them because you might not have streaming services. So that you are covering your bases as far as what mood you're going to be in. Like you might be in a drama mood, you might be in a comedy mood, you might be, if you're like me, in a classic movie mood. I love watching classic movies on the airplane because first of all I want everybody to look at me and see that I'm watching like a black and white movie.

[Luke Burbank]

And watching a classic movie is the reading of. It's the reading of movies.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Like everybody else is like Watching things explode and like. And what? And they're watching some Marvel crap or, like, some sort of, like, trash tv, and they look over and they're like, is that Marilyn Monroe in Niagara? And you bet your sweet Patukas it is. So anyway, I think that that is my advice to you is really think ahead of time about what you have downloaded and accessible on your devices.

[Luke Burbank]

That is a good point. I also have a great book that I started on the train when I was coming back from Liverpool. That is for Livewire. But it's. Do you remember the Hipster Grifter? I don't know how online you were at the time. It's a woman named Carrie Farrell, and she became the obsession of Gawker back in the day because she was sort of like this relatively young, hip woman who was kind of grifting all these, like, indie bros and finance bros and became kind of a legend in the scene. And then was written about Breathlessly and Gawker and has now written a book about how she ended up being the hipster grifter, which I went into it a little bit like, okay, well, now you're profiting yet again. But she's a very good writer. It's actually an entertaining book. So I've got that to read.

[Andrew Walsh]

And that's for work. That's an interview.

[Luke Burbank]

That's for work. That's for tbtl. We're interviewing her on Monday.

[Andrew Walsh]

Do I have to read?

[Luke Burbank]

That wouldn't hurt. I can summarize.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can I ask any questions about the Count of Monte Cristo? Because I'm now 71% into this book.

[Luke Burbank]

The original Hipster Grifter.

[Andrew Walsh]

Luke, I have got you, right? I have gotten to the point, and this is a huge success. Around 64% through. I got to the point where I understand what's going on enough that I don't have to read a chapter summary after each chapter. So that's progress. I'm now just reading this book. Like, a book now.

[Luke Burbank]

I want to be very real when I say I am frickin impressed. I really am. I know you're not bringing it up to gear.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's been a year, Luke. It's been.

[Luke Burbank]

Dude, I just. Yeah, but you're talking to the guy who downloaded the audiobook of Infinite Jest and got bored after three hours. Like, you have committed to this project and you're doing it, and I'm proud of you. I really am impressed at your determination.

[Andrew Walsh]

What am I gonna read after this? I'm gonna be open to just regular books again.

[Luke Burbank]

Count of Dagwood.

[Andrew Walsh]

The Count of Monty Garfield.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, I was going more sandwich.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh. Oh, I see.

[Luke Burbank]

The Count of Ruben.

[Andrew Walsh]

I didn't know what you were doing there. I thought you were just like, I'm going to be reading blogs.

[Luke Burbank]

It's bad that I picked a sandwich that is also a cartoon. Yeah, that was a bad choice.

[Andrew Walsh]

The Count of Monte Odis. All right, sorry, go ahead.

[Luke Burbank]

Hey, Andrew.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Oh, wait, hold on.

[Luke Burbank]

You have big weekend plans?

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, you gotta do it earlier. Big weekend. I was off the tab.

[Luke Burbank]

The biggest one I've ever had.

[Andrew Walsh]

Big weekend.

[Luke Burbank]

It's not just any weekend. It's Valentine's weekend. I should know the answer to this. Are you and Genevieve, are you Valentine's people? Do you get stuff? Do you go out for dinner? Do you do a thing?

[Andrew Walsh]

Not really. I think we're somewhere in the gray area on that. Depending on what circumstances are. When we were first dating, I assumed that we were both very anti Valentine's Day, and that ended up being a bit of a mistake. We're both like Gen X, eye rolling sarcasm. We don't go in for this. And I believe that we had said that and then turns out that there were some feels of we were much younger this day and age. I just don't think we really do. I mean, there might have been times that we've kind of gone out and it happens to be Valentine's Day. And so that's nice. But I will say, this time around, it's almost an un Valentine's Day because Genevieve, my friend, is out of town. I'm taking her to the airport here in a little bit. And so, in fact, I'm writing about this in the newsletter this week, so I'll try not to cannibalize that too much. But it's like, I don't know. We've talked about it a lot. I don't know why. That's sort of an exciting premise, the fact that I have, like, the house to myself for three days because there's literally nothing that Genevieve prevents me from doing. And that is the truth. Like, I don't get. I don't get eye rolls about anything. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I can.

[Luke Burbank]

Are you gonna subscribe to Fubo for three days?

[Andrew Walsh]

We don't police each other's actions except for when it comes to Fubo purchases. And so I don't know exactly what I'm going to do. I. My plan was really, though, I. I do love to be like solo bolo. You know, I like to just, like, Just not make any plans, not plan on seeing anybody if that ha. If I run into somebody or if I get a wild hair and I want to go to. If I want to go to Goldies and maybe Tex Camaro, Kev at the last minute, maybe do that. But his, he's such a late night. He's. He's starting his evening when I'm wrapping mine up usually especially if I'm up to my own like devices like this. So my plan is to really keep a low profile. Stay at home, maybe, you know, maybe go to a pizza shop and have some beers. But like kind of in a very like anonymous. I love just being an anonymous person. Like kind of being around people but nobody, but not with a group of my own friends. I guess maybe is the word I'm looking for. But.

[Luke Burbank]

No, no, no, I understand. I mean, I understand that feeling. And, and I think, yeah, it seems like you really like not having to be responsible to fulfill anyone else's again on a short term basis because you know, you love Genevieve and have been together for many, many years. So obviously you appreciate the relationship. But for like three days to have you're not responsible to anyone for anything is a good feeling for you, probably.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes, it is. Now it does look like. So there's a bingo night at the Eagles on Saturday, which I was not planning on attending, but because of some health issues with some folks who kind of run that things are a little bit. It sounds like they may literally need people to help with various tasks at bingo, like selling certain raffle cards or whatever. So I have engaged some for the. Yeah, the special. Yeah, selling special tickets for the blackout round and stuff. So there's a chance, like. So I heard from my friend Katie who's like, oh, well, we might need all hands on deck. So, you know, I realized that like, also here's the other thing about being home alone is usually like, I'm very excited about it.

[Luke Burbank]

The burglars.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, the burglars. And I gotta find the paint.

[Luke Burbank]

Those bandits, those wet bandits.

[Andrew Walsh]

Gotta find the paint cans. Gotta find some twine. Gotta make sure to know how to tie those knots to half hitch. But also the thing is I get excited about it and then usually Genevieve's gone about two hours. So I'm like, I miss Genevieve. So maybe by the time Saturday rolls around, I'll be happy. I'll be happy to help out at the Eagles.

[Luke Burbank]

So you'll be at the Eagle at the Eagles, sniffing various pleather stools and benches that Genevieve has sat on at some Point. Just trying to find. This is a weird way to say it. I just mean like looking for evidence of your girlfriend remembering.

[Andrew Walsh]

Not going salt burn on this, Luke, if that is what you were.

[Luke Burbank]

I didn't see that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, okay. Don't. Please don't. And nobody.

[Luke Burbank]

Should I download that for the flight.

[Andrew Walsh]

And actually, no, don't watch that on the flight. You don't want anybody looking over your shoulder and saying that. That's a pretty.

[Luke Burbank]

Is it black and white, though? Because I want to get, you know, some. It could be.

[Andrew Walsh]

I have a filter. You can make any movie black and white and that people will respect you more in airplanes. But anyway, so that.

[Luke Burbank]

John Cena in black and white.

[Andrew Walsh]

So. But I wanted to ask you though, what about you in Valentine's Day? What's going on?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, it's. Yeah, it's. It's on. I have in. In all of my relationships, I think I have. I didn't ever take the road that you took or that you attempted to take where you kind of low keyed it. I think I. I've always. I don't want to say made the mistake, but I've kind of high keyed it early on or at least, you know, made it a thing to where it would be weird if it ever. It would be admitting something if it stopped being a thing. And so, by the way, you know, I'm actually very, very excited to see Becca. It's been a long time. I've been over here and everything. So it's like, I'm looking forward to this, actually. But what I'm really looking forward to is February being over. Because I gotta tell you, man, from like December to February, it's brutal on me and the gift buying pressure, I mean, to some degree the actual monetary outlay, but more just the like. Because basically in those months we've got, obviously Christmas. We've also got Becca's birthday and we've got my daughter's birthday and we've got Valentine's Day. And all of those are events where I don't have the confidence to not show up for those events, if that makes any sense. Like I, if maybe if I was more confident, I could just say, hey, this year I just kind of went small or I just kind of. I got you this little something that reminded me of you or I thought you might enjoy it or something. I see all of these as a moment where I have to prove my love, my parenting skills, my boyfriending skills. So I put a lot of pressure on myself to really, like, over and this is not even to say that I buy these fabulous gifts or anything, but, like, I cannot. I do not know how to get away with just being like, how about we. How about we order some Thai food? You know? And so I am. I'm so relieved when basically, once we get past February 17, which is Addie's birthday, I'm out of the woods for, like, I don't know, nine months. But this is a very, very stressful time of year for me.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I know that feeling. Although I've abdicated so much responsibility by, again, just being, like, I guess, like, just setting the standard of me being whatever weirdness I am. In fact, Veeves and I. And this was a strange feeling. For the first time ever, I feel like almost every holiday season, Vivs and I will float the idea of, do you want to skip presents this year? And basically, my, like, I think maybe to the somewhat chagrin of even my folks back home, like, I stopped sending greeting cards a long time ago. It seems like such an antiquated thing. Like, greeting cards were such a big part of my childhood. Like, every Father's Day, you have to go to Hallmark a couple of weeks ahead of time. Get one for Grandpa, get one for Grandpa Walsh, Grandpa Simc, dad. You know what I mean? Like, greeting cards were just such a big thing and. And gifts and stuff. And then eventually, I've just whittled my life down until it's smaller and smaller and, like, I've sort of, like, I've lessened the expectation of greeting cards. We don't send out, like, the holiday batch cards like a lot of people do. I don't exchange gifts with anybody formally. I love finding a little something that makes me think of somebody and maybe tucking it away and giving it to them randomly. So if I'm painting myself as being a real jerk here, I'm Maybe that mitigates that a little bit. But the thing is, this was the first year Ravs and I were like, do you want to maybe skip Christmas gifts this year? And she's really good. She sends out a lot of gifts to her family and everything. So it's like she's already got a lot on her plate. And I think just kind of emotionally where we were, just kind of cosmically, we're just like, yeah, let's just skip it this year.

[Luke Burbank]

Wonder why. Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

And I just think that that was good. That felt good. But I will tell you this, Genevieve, it's sort of a lot of. Of gift stuff for us, too, because it's like, Christmas that Almost immediately, it's our anniversary. And then a couple months later, in early March, it's Genevieve's birthday. And I will say this. I went. I don't want to say too much because Genevieve can probably hear me, but I went someplace looking for just a little anniversary token gift. And when I was in that place, I found something that I literally had on a list of things that I wanted to look for for Genevieve's birthday. Something that is, I'll just say, not mass produced in the fact that I literally ran into it. I was able to buy the, the. The. The little thing that I wanted for her anniversary, but also for her birthday. So I have been locked in on birthday gift now, amazing, for like, already a month. And I still have a month to go. I'm having residual, like, I always feel guilty and pressure leading up to any kind of gift giving things. I always feel like I'm behind the ball and growing up, there is this bad feeling of I'm just gonna. I guess it's going to wander the mall and look for something for dad, you know, and that's how you end up getting like some sort of indoor golfing thing. And it's like, I don't even golf. What. Who are you? You know?

[Luke Burbank]

And that's how you end up buying your dad a laminated poster that says to error is human. To really screw things up, you need a computer. Just as actual. A random spot for my father, you know, it was what. It was what Craigen's pharmacy had on December 24th.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, it's funny you should say that. Well, I was going to say, like, I keep on kind of getting a residual feeling of that. Then I remember, no, no, no. I have the gift, and it's a great gift and I've been excited about it. So that's a good feeling. There is something specifically in my relationship with my dad that you ever have something, and I know you have, that starts off as sort of a bad thing in your relationship, but then you laugh about it and it ends up being like a joke forever. I don't know whether that's a romantic relationship or whatever, but there was a time that I was probably a early teenager, maybe a tween, but there was a lot of stuff going on in our family and, like, the folks were getting divorced. It was like ongoing. There was just like a lot of tumult and not great feelings going around. And I think I went to the mall and it was probably last minute, and I think I went to the mall with my mom. I'm Just like, wandering around, like, what do you get the Bob Walsh who has everything, right? And I wasn't sure. And then I saw this thing that I liked, which was like a brass, I want to say, but like a dark brass, not like a. I don't know, some sort of a metal. A dark metal little sculpture that was like an ape, I want to say, maybe about 5 inches tall, maybe 4 inches tall or something. And his hands are over his head and he's holding a little tray. And that tray is where you can keep your business cards. And I don't know why this thing spoke to me. It was, like, heavy. It was hefty, and it was like. So I'm saying ape. I don't even know. I call them all monkeys. And it makes Genevieve's really mad. Maybe it's a chimp. I don't know. But it's some sort of a creature like that. And he's holding this thing, and it's a business card holder. And it's the only time in my life that my dad opened a gift, and he was literally insulted by it. And at the time, I was pretty confused. I was like, I didn't mean it as a bad gift, but I think that probably it felt like. I think he was just going through a lot emotionally, and it probably felt like a very last minute, I don't give a shit gift. I didn't. I honestly did not have those feelings in giving it to him. I thought it was just like, I don't know, it's a quirky thing. Like, we're always buying him things he could put on his desk at work, right? So it's like, you put it on your desk at work, but it ended up being a pretty bad gift. And at some point, like, he said to me, like, at that. At the time, like, somehow he said that, he's like, I'm kind of hurt by that gift. It didn't seem like you were really thoughtful about it. And I was really shocked by that. And I can't remember all the blows. I think it's okay to tell this story.

[Luke Burbank]

Is the monkey holding a dish?

[Andrew Walsh]

Like, holding a dish, like, above his head? Did you find it online?

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. I'm looking at this.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can you send me a photo of it and I'll see if it's. Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

There are so many versions of this, and it's incredible.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's kind of cool.

[Luke Burbank]

I would love one of these.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, guess what? My dad now still has that in a place of honor in his home office. And we laugh about it all the time. And it's one of those things that I don't know if there's some sort of a parable there, sort of. But like, when something is sort of a point of contention or whatever, it can end up being a reminder of how much you love each other in a certain way. And so that kind of gives me good feelings to know that we kind of took this moment of somewhat awkwardness or whatever. As I was a teen and my dad was going through a big life change and I was kind of like, oh man, I would never get rid of this monkey business card holder. Like, this is the most important thing in my life.

[Luke Burbank]

Unfortunately, my dad no longer has the laminated poster that also featured, if I remember the art, was a cartoon of a guy who basically had a dot matrix printer that had gone crazy processed through all of the paper. He was surrounded by dot matrix printer paper. Here's the thing. I do not care about getting gifts myself. Like, if I could just agree with the world that no one will ever give me anything again for the rest of my life and I won't have to buy anyone anything, I would take that deal so quickly. Like, I find it actually kind of stressful to get. First of all, anything that I have decided I need. This is something that Becca is deeply annoyed with. Not deeply annoyed, but kind of like I'll say something in passion like, oh, I'm thinking about getting a whatever. And she'll go, well, that was your birthday present or something. Like, she's very thoughtful and observant. And so if there's something that I've mentioned, oh, I need that, or this broke or, or thinking about getting, like, if I mention if somehow she becomes aware that there might be something I could use, then she, and this is what makes her a good gift giver. She then goes and gets that thing for me at the time, even if it's months before my birthday or whatever, Christmas. But then I of course just usually acquire the thing by way of Amazon.com and then ruin the gift. So first of all, I'm annoying to buy for because I generally just buy things if I need them. And also it's just like, I just have enough stuff. I don't need any more stuff in my life. And then there's God bless, but then there's. I'll just be vague. There are the gifts that there are some people in my life that give me that I also just are not necessarily something I need. And then I've got to kind of manage my response to Getting that gift, being like, oh, okay, it's this, and then I have to keep it somewhere. I got in trouble one time because somebody gave me something, and then they came over to my house and. And found it in a drawer. Yeah, that was a. That was an awkward. Which we have not rehabilitated. Rehabilitated that into a family joke.

[Andrew Walsh]

Was it family?

[Luke Burbank]

It was.

[Andrew Walsh]

But, like, by the way, I'm looking at this. The. I'm looking at a bunch of listings. I just typed in monkey business card holder.

[Luke Burbank]

It's the first thing that comes up.

[Andrew Walsh]

And are you looking that? It's, like, listed on, like, Etsy and places for 150 bucks, 125 bucks. I'm taking. I'm stealing that thing back and I'm. I'm selling it.

[Luke Burbank]

I know you bought low.

[Andrew Walsh]

I bought low. I got to send this to my dad. There's one that's starting to oxidize, and that one's going for $91.

[Luke Burbank]

Dude, I would absolutely put that thing. I have business cards. I don't know why I have business cards. I think back when I was drinking more, I got drunk and ordered business cards. In fact, I know for a fact because it has that picture of my nose all broken. And I believe the business card says something like, thank you for your interest. The business card says, I understand.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thanks for coming.

[Luke Burbank]

Thanks for coming. Anyway, so, yeah, we're gonna go out on Saturday night in Portland. We'll see how the jet lag be lagging. Right? Like, that's gonna be. I mean, I'll be capable of keeping my eyes open and sitting at dinner. But yeah, we're gonna go out for dinner and kind of do the whole thing. Which, again, I'm very looking forward to spending time with Becca. It's just. It's just that, yeah, this time of year, I have this constant low level angst. And the thing that happens too, and I think I need to take a page from your playbook. Just, I need to buy stuff earlier. Because what happens is there's an inverse. Is it inverse? There's a direct relationship between how late I'm buying the gift and how much I'm spending on the gift. And the number the dollar amount goes up and up and up. Because if you're willing to throw enough money at the problem, you can always make a splash. You know, if you're willing to, like, whereas something that is thoughtful and is less expensive, but it's something I ordered, like, far in advance. Like, I'll just say, I got Addie this little I don't even know what you call it exactly. Not a bonnet. I read this New York Times article about how all the fashionable women of a certain age this winter are wearing this kind of like a. Kind of a warm scarf wrap for your head, but that. There was this place, this particular company in France that was making the ones that people really loved and I ordered it, but I had to order it like months before her birthday. And I gave it to her and she loved it. It was actually very, very sweet. We were driving home separately from Sou'wester and she called me to thank me again and was just really into this thing. So, like, if I was more. If I actually just thought about it earlier, I could get stuff that doesn't have to be prohibitively expensive. It's just thoughtful. Instead, it's usually the day of and I'm just driving around somewhere with a wad of cash in my pocket trying to buy their love with some ridiculous.

[Andrew Walsh]

Over the top gift or having to spend exorbitantly on shipping if you've bought it at the last minute and it's like, oh, if I had thought of this a week ago, this would be here by now for free.

[Luke Burbank]

Or the, the classic move of the. Here's a printout of the thing you will be receiving at some point.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh yeah, yeah, you've mentioned that.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, unfortunately I've been, you know, a perpetrator of that crime on people as well. So anyway, yeah, I have big weekend plans, big Valentine's plans. And again, so you're going to dinner.

[Andrew Walsh]

Somewhere in the Portland.

[Luke Burbank]

Going to dinner? Yeah, we're going to go kind of. That's pretty much the extent of it. We're going to go have some dinner and stuff. I do have the Valentine's gifts already purchased, which is kind of.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's nice.

[Luke Burbank]

A little bit ahead of the game for me. It's not like I, this is something that I, that I did a few weeks ago. It's not like I have to land and then I have to go to the like gift shop at PDX and try to find something.

[Andrew Walsh]

Get a Hess truck. Yeah, exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

Bring home some like crisps from Tesco.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right. Well, I know that you're a bit of a foodie and you're interested in an international flavor. Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

So this is a certain kind of brown sauce, Tate's potato chips that you just can't get in the States. Hey, this is a tiny little jam jar of something called brown sauce. Literally, in my hotel room there's this little thing they're very into their jams over here.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's what I hear.

[Luke Burbank]

And these jam jars are adorable. They came with, like, I ordered. I ordered some avocado toast when I first got here, like, at the beginning of the week, and for some reason, the toast was covered in avocado and tomatoes. It was pretty yummy. But they also brought me marmalade in this adorable little jar. This is made by Wilkins Sons limited. They gave me some marmalade. They gave me some strawberry jam, some black currant jam, and some brown sauce and some purple junk. And they're so cute. I feel like I should be displaying these jelly jars, not eating the jelly. Like, I was gonna eat some the other day. I was like, I want to see how this tastes. I was like, no, these are too cute. I can't open them.

[Andrew Walsh]

By the way, this is straight up a monkey.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know.

[Andrew Walsh]

I get so in my head about monkeys and chimps and apes because Genevieve's always giving me a hard time about it. I'm going back to calling everything monkeys again, because this one is just a monkey. I did text my dad, by the way. I said, you monkey business card holder is now a collector's Item listed at 150. I'm wondering if we should sell. If he responds, I'll let you know, because I'm interested in knowing how we would split that. Like, really, it's a gift. I don't really get my beak wet at all. I would assume, in that situation, but I sort of feel like I took. You know, I kind of took some slings and arrows. Like, I feel like I should get a little something.

[Luke Burbank]

A little just, you know, like, pick up the check next time you guys get dinner.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right? Exactly, Bob. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Like, let me ask you a real.

[Andrew Walsh]

Question a little bit harder. I can't. I can never pick up the check. Never.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, my God. Do you know the last time I didn't pay for a meal with my parents?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah. They're all. Yeah, yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

They. 20 years ago. My parents have not picked up a check in my presence for 20 years.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, wait, I'm sorry. I got it backwards. Oh. Oh, another. I thought you were saying they. They insist on paying. Oh. Oh, my dad never lets me pay. I try so hard.

[Luke Burbank]

No, no, I know. And that's how it should be. Do you think Addie has ever picked up a check in my presence? Of course not. Like, I'm the sandwich generation, Andrew. I'm the one always picking up the check. Like. Like, I'm telling you, my parents And I love them dearly. My parents have literally not paid for a meal for me in my adult lifetime. Like, that's not true. They paid for my rehearsal dinner for my first wedding, I gotta say.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, one wedding is probably, I guess.

[Luke Burbank]

After that that was also not a cheap meal. It was at Cafe Lago. It was lovely. And they were, you know, I think at the time pretty broke. So that was a very, very kind gesture. I did not ask them for the second to do anything. For the second wedding. I will not ask them if I have a third, fourth or fifth wedding to do anything. But at some point, it started with, I didn't want to be messing with the entertainment book anymore. I didn't want to be like, on the occasion that we went out, I didn't want it to be the case that like, I couldn't order what I wanted because it was like, you know, like we're the kind of family that when we did go out, we never got soda. So it's like, we're getting pizza, I want us to have soda. And also I want to get extra toppings on the pizza. And also. And so at some point it became easier for me to just pick up the check. And then it just became, you know, it became kind of the standard is that. And I don't mean this with my siblings per se, but like, you know, in fact, my siblings are amazing because they're all phenomenal cooks. And if we go to their house, there's always a big spread. It's just like the idea, if I were to go out to dinner with my mom and dad, the idea that they would reach for the check is preposterous at this point. And I don't think that's the norm.

[Andrew Walsh]

The funny thing is kind of traditional and again, it's very loving. But my folks, when I'm visiting them and I need to get a trip on the books there, maybe do a week and maybe do a few shows of TBTL from my folks basement again. I got that new rig, which might even make things easier. Luke.

[Luke Burbank]

Fancy.

[Andrew Walsh]

All of that is to say it's always very, very sweet, but I'm always like, come on, let me buy one. And I remember the last. Well, maybe it wasn't the last time, but I remember I was there with Viv. So this is going back aways. But it was like our last meal and like when I'm visiting. Our last meal when I'm. When I'm visiting. Do you know I had to change the show title after 24 hours or maybe even after the weekend, I think. On Friday.

[Luke Burbank]

Did you change it to your first meal?

[Andrew Walsh]

Did you see that I had missed label? Yeah, you had said your. Your first meal, which is a joke because we have a friend, obviously, who has your last meal, Rachel Bell's podcast, your last meal. And I think you said your first meal or something. We're like, okay, that's a good show title. But I put it. For some reason, I got confused when I was posting the show and I wrote my first meal, which isn't a. That's not a parody of anything. And all weekend it said my first meal. And then I was looking at my phone or something over the weekend, I was like, what the hell did I do? And I was like, well, it's too late now. Toothpaste out of the two. But then I logged back in on Monday morning. I'm like, no, this will not stand. And I went and I changed it. Had you. Did you notice that journey?

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know if I noticed the journey, but I remember seeing the show title and thinking, is that what I said? I was a little confused, but obviously not enough to do anything about it.

[Andrew Walsh]

The thing is, I think you did say that because of the context in which we were talking.

[Luke Burbank]

Maybe I misspoke it, so you should have cleaned it up for me.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, sort of. It wasn't like you misspoke in the context of the conversation. That's how the joke made sense. But either way, the mistake was on me for not kind of catching that. Okay, so all of that is to say we spent a bunch of time with my folks. We spend a lot of time at restaurants when I'm visiting my folks. That's sort of the main thing we do. And finally, on our last day there, I believe we're heading to the airport, but we're having breakfast. And it was like, me and Genevieve, my folks, and at least one set of aunts and uncles. I think there was six of us, maybe maybe eight, but I think six. Oh, no, my sister. It was like close to seven or eight, actually, I think. And we're like, please. We really just let. I think I maybe even said in advance, I would really like to get this. Like, it's just. It's not that big of a deal. Breakfast is the most affordable meal usually. Like, let's do it. And then the bill came, and my folks like the type of places I like, which are very, very simple, like, diner y kind of breakfast places. And this is in, like, the suburbs of Cleveland, so it's not even in, like, the heart of Cleveland area, where. And the check comes. And again, there were at least seven of us there. And the check comes. It was like $50. I don't even know if it was $50 or something. And then I remember my aunt and uncle being like, oh, my God, like, you're so generous. Like, you don't. Like everybody was making such a big deal about us getting the check, and it was like the most affordable thing. I don't even understand how it could have been as inexpensive as that. But it was just like, you know, it was just a quick breakfast place, you know. So anyway, that's how you maintain your heroes. Yeah. That's the way you want to do my life. Yeah, exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

If you want to know the. If you want to know the move, if you ever really, like, are insistent on paying and you want to just. The ultimate Power Flex and the way to get it done is you get up to use the restroom and then you. You kind of find your server and then you give them your card and you say, hey, I want to make sure that the other person doesn't pay.

[Andrew Walsh]

I did that one backfire it. Like, yeah, this was with. This was with Genevieve's folks. And this was a long, long time ago, though. But Genevieve's dad, very similar, really wants to pick up the tab generously. But it was one of those things where I was like, I just, you know, we just. They were visiting us here in Seattle, and. And so I got up and I. I used the restroom and I did that exact move. I gave them the card. But I think sometimes. I think sometimes you just gotta learn that, like, this means a lot to the other person and you don't do that. And I. I think that the server came back and somehow I think they canceled the check or something. And then he said it was like it ended up making. I don't. Maybe it didn't quite. Maybe the card didn't quite get run. But somehow my surreptitious move there was picked up on. And it was like, no, no, no, no. That is not how this works. And I was, okay. And I had to sheepishly put my wallet away.

[Luke Burbank]

I guess there's different levels to it because usually the people. When I'm getting the check, everyone's, you know, oh, you didn't have to. But nobody's like. Like nobody's grabbing the waiter by the lapels and dragging him back to the table to go ahead. I gotta get some friends like that and some in laws like that. I gotta get some.

[Andrew Walsh]

I gotta get some more friends like you. I'm going to dinner with you more often.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, I just want to say for the record, you and Veeves are very generous and you are very quick to pick up the check or the round. You guys are really great about that and I've always appreciated that about you. Because I'm doing it not out of niceness. I'm doing it out of insecurity. I'm doing it out of. I cannot handle that moment when people are like looking at the check and analyzing who had what.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, God, I don't want to do that.

[Luke Burbank]

Is that is the rental car shuttle of socializing in that? It is an endless amount of time. It might be 30 seconds, but it feels like an eternity. It is. It makes me so. It's probably some deep seated shit from growing up, you know, without a lot of money or in, you know, in a household where you're constantly worried about what things were costing. It makes me so uncomfortable. I just hate that sometimes we can get away with a good. Like when we go out with Becca's brother and sister, Scott and Tiff, we'll just do 50, 50, that's fine. I can deal with that. But if it starts to get into like, well, we ordered this appetizer and you ordered that or whatever, I mean, I am, I will pay so quickly that, I mean, I'm giving away my secret here, my Achilles heel. If you dilly dally with the bill, I am just paying it because I cannot handle being in that conversation next.

[Andrew Walsh]

Time I'm out with you. I'm like, well, you did have a, you did have a bite of my broccoli. Luke, this is a format buster and we shouldn't do it. But I think this is such a good place to raise a voicemail that a listener sent in. This is from listener Jonathan in Chicago. And by the way, I'm going to cut about. I'm just going to needle drop this about, I don't know, a third of the way into the voicemail. But I will summarize how this begins. Jonathan is the person who is in Chicago. And remember we got a voicemail from listener Moira who recognized a TBTL 10 in the wild because you could see the logo of our show on his phone. And so she and her husband Gregory, like, went up to this person and was like, ah, well, that was Jonathan. And so Jonathan identifies himself that way.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay. But this is not, this is not our listener in Chicago who saw someone who was a 10. And then her sister called. Now it's Not Mariah, right?

[Andrew Walsh]

No, it is, it is. Her sister saw a 10, but it was just a good looking. But it was Mariah and Gregory in Chicago who saw Jonathan. And Jonathan identifies himself himself. It's like I was that person. Gregory came up to me and just started shouting tbtl. But then he's calling though, for a different reason. And this is the reason.

[C]

I have this friend who, his buddy booked a trip to Germany for Oktoberfest. And a couple weeks later he decided, oh, hey, I should go too. You know, he's married, but he was able to get away for a little bit. And then ultimately their other friend and his wife jumped in as well. So they go to Germany, go to Oktoberfest, drink the beer, do all the fun stuff, come back. And he puts his, the expenses into split wise, you know, an app where you can kind of tally everything up and, and split it and send it out. So he does that and a day or two later he gets a message back from the married friend that's like, hey, you charge us, you know, half the car rental, what's up with that? We're just like a third of it, right? And he's like, no, you're, you're two out of four people. So that's 50% math, right? So I don't know with something like that, as opposed to say like a dinner, right, where you go out and there's sort of like a known quantity of food that each person consumes and you can kind of, you know, calculate out what you owe. What do you think about this situation with the car? You know, it's not like they had to bump up from a three seater to a four seater or something like that, or you know, that it actually caused any more cost for the, for the group with having a fourth person versus just three. But I don't know, the lines are blurry to me. Let me know what you think.

[Andrew Walsh]

So there are a lot of details at the beginning, but essentially it sounds like you have four people renting a car together, but two of them are a couple. And it sounds like maybe a late addition as well to the whole adventure. And so if two of the four.

[Luke Burbank]

People, is it divided by four divided.

[Andrew Walsh]

By three, is it divided by four or three? And I got to be honest with you, first of all, all I would just never make an issue of it one way or the other. Like, if anybody said, I feel like this isn't fair, I'd be like, okay, we'll cover it. Like, maybe I'd roll my eyes behind their back a little bit, depending on how I felt about that particular situation or what that with this friend's track record is. That's a big part of these things. You know, if you have the friend who's always on the cheap side and then pulling stuff, that can kind of rankle. But in this case, I gotta say, four people renting a car, you split it four ways and the couple does pay like, like basically half. What do you think?

[Luke Burbank]

I think. Well, first of all, you're pushing a pro natalist, pro relationshipist agenda again on this show. It's not really natalist.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know what natalist means.

[Luke Burbank]

It's. I don't even know if I want to dignify this with like, with treating like it's a real thing. I mean, I guess JD Vance would be described as natalist. Like there's this, there's a movement of people that are basically like, all Americans need to be having way more kids. There was a profile in the Washington Post a couple weeks ago about this bonkers family. I think they're relatively young, they're probably much younger than me, but husband and wife, and they have many, many kids. And there's nothing wrong with that. I'm from a family of seven. But their stated belief and their whole organizing principle of their lives is pronatalism. They're self identified natalists. And so I just. That word's been banging around in my head. It's not related to the rental car situation. It is. I guess what I would say is if I was the person who rented the car. So it's like me and Camaro, Kev and you and Veeves. I think I would count you guys as a third. Really. The thing about that is it's kind of a bad deal for Camaro. It's a bad deal for me too. But I'm deciding I'm raising the cost for me and Camaro, you know, unilaterally. But I guess I would think of you as a package deal.

[Andrew Walsh]

But. Yeah, no, I just think I. First of all, I'm always trying to not think of me as a package deal. Me and Genevieve, because it's Valentine's Day, I don't have a date. I don't know if you've heard, Genevieve is out of town. So, you know, I'm just trying to keep a little bit of romantic independence here. But I don't know, man, I sort of feel. Whatever. In this case, I'm putting myself in the position of the couple. So maybe I'm just trying to make myself seem more generous. But it's sort of like. Well, I mean, is a car more comfortable if there's three people in it instead of four? I mean, I guess slightly. I just sort of feel like, yeah, we. Like, we. Genevieve and I. Okay, what's the difference between a car and lodging, then? Because when us and a bunch of friends went to Croatia, we really, like, kind of splashed out on a pretty, like, expensive dwelling, you know, with a beautiful, like, pool in the mountainside or whatever. It was really great. Like, Viva and I both paid, you know, our. We split it amongst how many of us were there, or six or seven or eight or something. We paid our. We each paid whatever chunk of that would be right. Like, we didn't get a discount because we're a couple. If anything, that would be kind of rude to the people who weren't couples.

[Luke Burbank]

I guess if I think about it that way, then I would. I mean, because you guys didn't need two rooms. That's the thing. You and Genevieve needed a room, and somebody who was there by themselves needed a room. So in that way, it's actually, you know, like, the car is a. Is a different comparison because they're. There's more space being taken up if it's the amount of the Airbnb that's being utilized. I mean, I guess if you get into shared spaces in the bathrooms and stuff, maybe that's another thing. I guess from the perspective of it's a bad deal for the people who are going solo, then in that case, you probably should have it be that every. You just take the number of people there and divide it up by that number. That's probably the best way to do it, the most fair way to do it. But that's why I never invite single people to places. It's just much easier if it's like, okay, there's four couples, and it's this much, and each couple takes a fourth of it on. Because. Because, again, you didn't. If you and Veeves needed separate bedrooms and then wanted to only pay as one unit, that would be, like, wildly unfair. But I'm guessing you guys only used the same amount of room that anybody else was using, whether they were single or in a couple.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes, but I mean. But also, like, the only reason we were able to get this kind of house is because we're all chipping in, you know, like. So here's the thing I'd like to ask you. Let's go back to the car example. Here you are. You're sort of Answering this from the perspective of the person who rented the car and is now asking for people to chip in. And you're being kind of. What's the word I'm looking for? Not gregarious, I guess, generous towards me and Genevieve. In this case, you're being classic Burbankian and saying, don't worry about it. Like, you guys count as one unit in this car. But let's switch the role around. Let's say that you're the per. Like, you didn't plan any of this, right? We rented a car or whatever. Although I don't like putting myself in this position. And Veeves and I send you and Becca, like, your portion of the bill together. I just send it to you. It's like, well, this is your portion. You and Becca should each pay a quarter of the car. Would you be at all put off by that, or would you even think twice about it? I don't think I would.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't think I would. I'll tell you what I wouldn't do was what this person in the story did. I wouldn't have crunched the numbers. Like, because it sounds really like what happened was this person said, okay, I'm paying this much, you're paying this much, and you're paying this much. And then the person, some member of the couple went in and then re. Crunched the numbers. Like, I doubt that it was. In other words, I can't believe that somebody actually took the time to go in and they were like, that seems off. That seems like more than I should be paying. We should be paying. And then they went back in and redid it and were like, hey, why aren't you charging us as. As a single entity? Like, that is a bold move. A bold move to email somebody like, hey, what gives with this? You're not getting invited on our next trip to. Where were they going again?

[Andrew Walsh]

This was Germany, I think. Wasn't this one October Fest?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Nine. You're not getting invited on our next Oktoberfest trip. With that attitude.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think it's interesting, you and I. First of all, I think that you and I share a quality that is, I think, mostly good, which is not wanting to seem parsimonious in any way. Like, even if I maybe roll my eyes about some sort of behavior later of a friend who, like, always is maybe slow. I'm telling you, this doesn't really happen that much. But, like, if you have a friend who's got a real track record of being a cheapo, like, maybe I'll Have a snarky conversation with Genevieve in private about that. Like, well, guess who didn't pick up the bill again? Or something? But, like, that's not a very common thing. And also, like, that makes me sound pretty toxic. But. But for the most part, you just want to. You want to get it first, and then, like, if you're. If you're a little bit after that, then maybe, you know, don't go out the next time or something. You know what I mean? Like, I just sort of feel like we'll figure it out later, but in the moment, I just. I want to be this person. Having said that, though, you and I are also of a certain. We have a lot of different privilege. But aside from just even that and being lucky enough to be in a position where we don't have to count every single dollar the way we did when we were younger and, like, literally saying, my. My car broke down, I don't know if I can still go to Taco Bell. You know what I mean? Like, the thing is, there are people who live even closer to our age, but they live a different kind of lifestyle where they're traveling in groups a lot. And because of that, they build up some walls around that as well. It's kind of like Genevieve went on a trip with a group of friends who she was, like, varying degrees of close to. You know what I mean? Like, a couple that she's pretty close to, but then some friends of friends that were in this thing, and they all went down to Sonoma or whatever. And I think there was some pretty big wealth disparity between the folks. I'll just say that Genevieve was definitely the poorest of this group. And I know that they were using some sort of app afterwards where there was kind of like, okay, well, this person they were trying to keep track of, like, well, this person got this pretty fancy brunch and pick up the whole thing, a boozy brunch. And this person got this really fancy dinner here or whatever. And so they were also buying groceries for the house for the week or whatever. It's like, well, I'll pick up the groceries, put in the app. Like, I don't want to make it sound like if you're not looking to be kind of fair and square with a big group of people you're traveling with, that you're cheap in some way. I understand. And if that's a big part of your life, then you're going to be like, okay, well, I need to, like, kind of, if I want to continue to Travel with friends. I need to make sure that I'm not footing every bill the whole way. And so you might find yourself being a little bit more protective. I may be saying that to folks who have a different life experience than us around this kind of stuff, but generally speaking, I do think that a lot of you and I talking about this, it comes from this place of just never, never, never wanting to be, as you said, the person who said, like, well, really, you got, well you guys got drinks and we didn't. You know what I mean? It's like, I don't. Yeah, I just, I hear that sometimes it's like, well, I'm a non drinker and I'm always picking up the tab for the people who are drinking. And if you're a non drinker and that's always happening to you, I could see it being a little bit frustrating. But I'm just telling you, I'm never going to be the person who says like, hey, you had a vodka tonic and I had a coke. I don't think that like we should be splitting this evenly. Like, I just, I cannot be that person.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I mean really, I think the move is to just have really clear boundaries about it. Not boundaries is a weird word. It's very loaded for me, I assume to me when I say boundaries, I, I mean someone not letting me do what I want, I don't want. No, but like you're talking about that trip. I mean that could be really stressful if you're traveling with a group and a lot of them are at one kind of income level and are proposing these kinds of events. And it's like everyone's grabbing, you know, oh, I grabbed that dinner. But then, you know, so then you get this golf outing or I don't know how that even works. But that could be really stressful. And really the move on that is to just say like, we are going to track all of this and people are only going to pay for the. Only going to pay for what they, for what they used or whatever and just be okay with it. Like that's actually how I would like to be living my life. But I'm too insecure to do that. So instead I'm not constantly, but I'm often the one grabbing the thing because I just don't want it to be awkward. But then like low key, a little butthurt about it. Maybe that's not true. I'm not butthurt about picking up the check. But I guess what I'm trying to say is it's a much better system to just like be really clear about the. Here's what we're gonna, you know, here's who's paying for what and this is how we're gonna divide it all up. And then no one has to be stressed. No one has to be like, oh man. Well, I got the dinner when everyone was like on their third, you know, mixed drink. But then that other person got breakfast, which as we've learned just today, Andrew, classically cheap meal.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm telling you, ideally eggs, nest.

[Luke Burbank]

Less. Less drinking. Ideally for most people at breakfast. I hope so. You know what I mean? Like, I've, I've been in a position where it's like we're all kind of, we're all. Everybody's gonna grab one of these things. But then I'm like, but I have. How did I get grabbing the one. That's the. You know, like my point is just, it's better to be really clear and upfront about stuff and then just stick to it. And then it's like probably like a potentially awkward five minute conversation where maybe someone's like, well, that doesn't feel super fun or super generous or gracious, but like you get through that awkward five minutes and then no one is stressing the rest of the trip, you know, feeling like they're getting kind of like the short end of the, you know, the stick or whatever.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. And I do think it has to do with the context of who the folks are and what your relationship is because like throughout this conversation, like there are literally.

[Luke Burbank]

Did their last name rhyme with you?

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know. I'm talking over you. I don't even want to. I don't know what you're going to say there because I think, you know, there are.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I actually don't.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, well, there. I was just going to say there are like literally two people in my life and this doesn't come up all that often, but there are two people in my life that I will find myself like dining with or somehow sharing expensive expenses with where it's like, well, of course this is coming from this person. You know what I mean? Because they, it's just like. And that's where the track record of it is kind of. I'll just buy, like, I'll just. And sometimes when I hear that, I'm just like, I'll just pick up the whole check, you know what I mean? If anybody is even getting. I'm not, I never, I'm never aggressive about it, but it's like, sure, can we just. I just want to. When I see that behavior, I want to be the opposite of that behavior. It inspires me to be more generous.

[Luke Burbank]

I want to be a better person, Andrew, because of the people and the behavior. I was, by the way, I was talking about the people that Veeves were traveling with who were very well supported. I said, does it rhyme with Bill Grates of Michael Soft?

[Andrew Walsh]

It is not. I'll say that it is about one degree of separation away from Bill. Really maybe two degrees of separation.

[Luke Burbank]

Can we White Lotus with them sometime?

[Andrew Walsh]

If Genevieve, did she tell you about this? She stayed and like one of them is a colleague who was who I believe her partner husband was very high up in, in that organization on the east side of Seattle.

[Luke Burbank]

And I guess I've been training him for years.

[Andrew Walsh]

Cybersecurity in like it sounded like BoJack Horseman's house. Basically like lives in just like the fanciest, richest version of mid century modern paradise in Palms outside of Palm Springs, I want to say or something like that. Yeah, it was like it sounded, it sounded.

[Luke Burbank]

Ask them if I can be friends with them.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I thought Genevieve would have told you about this because it was just like, oh, so this is Luke's dream.

[Luke Burbank]

Sounds like it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thank you for being a TAM.

[Luke Burbank]

Speaking of sharing the financial load and I mean that whole conversation was a perfect lead into this to thanking some people who are, who are voluntarily sharing the load of TBTL support. They are sending in their hard earned money so that we can do this for our job. And it's an incredible thing. It's an incredible thing that Mark Jeffrey from. Is it? Oh, you know, I thought that this.

[Andrew Walsh]

You thought it was a typo.

[Luke Burbank]

Was a typo.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's not. I had to Google it too.

[Luke Burbank]

It's not a typo. I thought that we were thanking Mark Jeffrey in Chicago City, but that isn't what we call it. And then I read on, it's Minnesota. It's Chisago City. How do they say it over there?

[Andrew Walsh]

Chisago. Chisago. It looks like Chicago, only instead of the second C, it's an S. Chissago City, Minnesota.

[Luke Burbank]

Chicago City. Minnesota is where Mark Jeffrey is. Thank you, Mark. Bet that doesn't confuse anyone ever.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, I bet you were the first people to ever have that conversation about that city. Which makes me also wondering, I wonder if Mark is a new daily donor. Thank you, Mark. I don't remember.

[Luke Burbank]

Or maybe move to Chicago.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, that's Chicago.

[Luke Burbank]

Impossible to say. Chicago.

[Andrew Walsh]

Chicago, I believe. Do you want to know something?

[Luke Burbank]

I wonder if that's. Is the name Chicago. Is that Native American? I wonder if Sago and Chicago are both maybe Native American in their origins. I don't know.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's just about 35 miles outside of the Twin Cities. By the way, it's small. It's got a population. Luke, in 2010, a population listed as under 5,000 people. 4,900 people there. So it's a small, little beautiful community, it looks like.

[Luke Burbank]

Is it right near Nam? York City, Minnesota.

[Andrew Walsh]

New to York City. What is new to York City?

[Luke Burbank]

New to York City. That's a better joke. Lucien Banning is in Olympia, Washington. We have no trouble saying Olympia, Washington.

[Andrew Walsh]

Not at all.

[Luke Burbank]

Thank you. Thank you, Lucien. Thanks also to my pal Evan Yesberger out there in Mount Vernon, Washington. My buddy Evan, my gun pal.

[Andrew Walsh]

There's not a lot of donors that you can refer to as a gunk holder. In fact, I tell you, I'm not.

[Luke Burbank]

Saying that, but after the email from John asking that I stop.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's right.

[Luke Burbank]

This is very apt. Evan is my buddy who owns this amazing sailboat, Seabird, and we've been out on that boat many times. Evan is an absolute gem. Thanks, Evan. Appreciate you, man. This is really nice. Thanks also to Megan Raqueta of Houston, Texas.

[Andrew Walsh]

Nice.

[Luke Burbank]

Very helpful pronouncer.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I love that it says rhymes with cicada.

[Luke Burbank]

What if I thought that word was cicada? Chicada. I mean, this does rest on me knowing how the word cicada is pronounced. Although it's been in the news a lot lately.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I feel like every seven years. Years. It's a pretty big news story.

[Luke Burbank]

Thank you, Megan Raqueta of Houston, Texas. Thanks also to Rosemary Donnelly of Jacksonville, Florida.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thank you, Rosemary.

[Luke Burbank]

And then it wouldn't be. It wouldn't be a full week of tbtl.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sorry.

[Luke Burbank]

Bortles.

[Andrew Walsh]

Bortles.

[Luke Burbank]

I forgot about that show. God, that show was good. It was Stacia Colacerto of Tacoma, Washington. It sounded like Stacia was in trouble.

[Andrew Walsh]

I was just being careful because I.

[Luke Burbank]

Wanted to make sure I was saying Stacia's name correctly. Stacia Cola Serdo of Tacoma, Washington.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well done. Well done by you, Luke. Congratulations. And also thank you so much, Stacia and everybody for keeping this show going.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right. We sort of ran out of time today on the story of the snake attack on the woman, but I've got the tape pulled. Maybe we can play that on Monday or something at some point. It's an evergreen. It's the insanity of what happened to this woman will be as insane at some point next week as it. As it would be today. So.

[Andrew Walsh]

So you're getting on a plane very shortly and heading back stateside.

[Luke Burbank]

Stateside. And I guess my other big report on Monday will be, did I make the right decision?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, on the seating situation.

[Luke Burbank]

It's hard because, because of the note, not to revisit this whole topic, but basically because of my little airline status with Alaska Airlines and American Airlines is part of the club, I can pick my own seat, which is a great thing. But there are a lot of available seats on this flight. And that's almost like a worse thing because it's the paralysis of having a lot of decisions. If there was just one window seat, I would just pick it. Or one aisle. Anything that's not in the middle, I would just pick it. But the fact that I can go in probably all the way up until I get to the airport and potentially keep removing around the, you know, the position I'm in, it's. It's making me. It's. It's making me a little nuts. But I'll give you a report on Monday on if I made the right.

[Andrew Walsh]

Call because you're adding the factor of. I mean, it seems great why I have so many options, but it also means that a lot of people haven't picked their seats yet either. So your decision could be, you know, could be good or bad based on actions after you've made your decision.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, the good news about where I'm currently sitting is it's locked in. In that there are two people already next to me, so I don't have any illusion of having. I mean, that's another thing. You're right. Part of the window strategy would be, well, maybe that middle seat stays not taken, but I don't know how sold out the flight is. And it could, you know, those middle seats could all fill up with people that weren't allowed to pick their seat until the flight was, you know, about to take off. And then that would really. I mean, that's the other thing. The danger of that being sardined in with. With two strangers next to me for 10 hours. That. That could be rough. I think I'm feeling. I'm talking myself into and feeling better about my decision to be on an aisle at the very front of Bad Coach.

[Andrew Walsh]

You got it locked in now. It's the front. Yeah. And also, don't be shy about, which.

[Luke Burbank]

Is also Craig T. Nelson's memoir, Bad Coach.

[Andrew Walsh]

The good part is the good with.

[Luke Burbank]

The Bad coach I don't know. I'm trying.

[Andrew Walsh]

Trying to riff on that. But also, you're always talking about the southbound whatever on a northbound whatever. Trying to work that into Coach and Craig T. Nelson. I. You heard me melt down there. I guess it's a good thing. We're maybe pausing for the weekend here. I'll try to be fresher on Monday.

[Luke Burbank]

I think you have. I'm giving you 10 rotten tomatoes. That's good, right?

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't.

[Luke Burbank]

Fresh.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wait.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm giving you five bags of popcorn. Did I tell you about my mom? Did I send you that message from my mom? We were talking about some movie, and you were roasting it, and she said it's got a 64% fresh rating on Rotten Tomatoes.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wait a second. Was that. Did you. I wondered why you sent me that. You said I was roasting that movie. Is that true? You said there was a movie that.

[Luke Burbank]

You said you didn't want to watch or that you hadn't enjoyed. And my mom was listening to that episode, and then she went and looked up its Rotten Tomatoes score. Oh, you know what it was? It was the movie about the. How much does the soul weigh?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah. I wasn't roasting it. I'd never seen it. I never. I know.

[Luke Burbank]

You were saying you would never see it. You were saying it was not for you.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, it was not for me. Okay. And I thought. But I thought.

[Luke Burbank]

And also not for my mom, except she just wanted to find out if it was a good movie. I just think it's hilarious that she takes Rotten Tomatoes as such gospel.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let's see here. I'm looking at. Well. Oh, I see your colonoscopy report. There you go. The movie, was it Andrew Reeves referred.

[Luke Burbank]

To as, like, 21 grams.

[Andrew Walsh]

21 grams. And they got an 80% on rotten tomatoes. Although I haven't seen it just based on the popularity.

[Luke Burbank]

Maybe we should have my mom start doing movie reviews of movies she hasn't seen but has looked up on Rotten Tomatoes.

[Andrew Walsh]

That would be so good. Genevieve does play a game with me sometimes. We're having. Sorry, we gotta wrap this up. We're having breakfast the other day at the ihop, and. And I said, I made some illusion to the movie Titanic, which I've never seen. And she looked at me. She did that thing. She cocked her head a little bit. She's like, what do you think the plot of the Titanic is? I just put down your phone. Tell me what you think the plot of the Titanic is. I'm like, well, I know that there's like, draw me like one of your little French girls. There's a hand on a window during an amorous meeting.

[Luke Burbank]

Focusing on the horny.

[Andrew Walsh]

I really was focusing on the horning parts. I know that a lot of people think there was room for him on the plank at the end, but apparently there wasn't. And there's a. And an old lady tells the whole story. You realize at the end that's that. And a guy is the plot of the Titanic.

[Luke Burbank]

Near, far, wherever you are, My heart will go on. It's also the movie that this guy Barry, that we used to know, not. Not our friend broadcast Barry, totally different Barry, who had the two weirdest lies. One of his lies was that he had named the Bedazzler 2. And these were not, like, jokes. He was very serious about this. And this other lie was that he had painted. He was the one who painted the paintings that Leo DiCaprio's character pretends to paint. And I was telling people this for years, and then someone was like, it's well known that it's James Cameron. It's very proven. Like, it's weird that we know who did paint them. Could have just been a set designer, but. But no, it's James Cameron, I believe, or something famously so. It's like, Barry, get a better lie.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, as Guillote said, it's just some Barry that I used to know. I'm back, baby.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm back. Yes, that's a show title. All right, thanks, everybody. We'll see you on Monday. In the meantime, have a great weekend. Take care of yourselves. And please remember, no Mountain Too tall.

[Andrew Walsh]

And good luck to all. Power out.