#4466 The Denny’s Was A Woman!

Summary

Podcast Summary: TBTL Episode #4466 – "The Denny’s Was A Woman!"

Release Date: May 14, 2025

Hosts: Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh

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Introduction: Setting the Tone

In Episode #4466 of TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live, hosts Luke Burbank and Andrew Walsh dive into a blend of personal anecdotes, humorous exchanges, and earnest discussions. The episode intertwines topics ranging from Andrew's upcoming colonoscopy to the peculiarities of the name "Denny's," all while maintaining their signature lighthearted banter.

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Andrew's Colonoscopy Prep: Navigating Dietary Restrictions

A significant portion of the episode centers around Andrew's preparation for his colonoscopy. The hosts discuss the challenges of adhering to a strict liquid diet, coping with the unpalatable taste of the cleansing solution, and the anxiety surrounding the medical procedure.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Walsh [05:10]: "I want to start the clown portion of the meeting. Well, all right."
• Luke Burbank [06:37]: "I have this weird, like, hole in my stomach feeling. It's my least favorite kind of hunger. Don't do anything out of hunger."
• Andrew Walsh [19:42]: "If you were somebody who had the option to say you were flying for work or you just had the resources and you could..."

The conversation delves into the meticulous planning required for the diet, Luke’s experience with fasting, and their mutual support in facing the upcoming medical procedures. They also touch upon past experiences with colonoscopies, highlighting contrasting preparations and outcomes.

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The Mystery of "Denny's": Unraveling the Name

A humorous and quirky segment unfolds as Luke and Andrew ponder the origins of the name "Denny's." This leads to an engaging discussion about various potential full forms of "Denny," exploring names like Dennis, Denise, Denver, and even more obscure Czech names.

Notable Quotes:

• Luke Burbank [11:07]: "Dennis is the first one I thought of. Denise."
• Andrew Walsh [11:12]: "I don't think you know, though, how quickly the people will email us about it."

Their playful banter not only entertains but also showcases their chemistry as friends navigating whimsical topics together.

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Food Planning and Dietary Challenges: A Comedy of Errors

The hosts humorously recount their struggles with meal planning, especially under the constraints of Andrew's liquid diet. Luke shares his difficulty in transitioning from casual snacking to intentional eating, leading to amusing revelations about his culinary habits—or lack thereof.

Notable Quotes:

• Luke Burbank [16:09]: "I sort of realized that I don't eat very intentionally. I sort of snack a lot during the day."
• Andrew Walsh [17:43]: "Yeah girl, you familiar with the girl dinner concept?"

This segment highlights the everyday challenges of sticking to dietary restrictions, infused with their trademark humor and relatable experiences.

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Listener Messages and Community: Building Connections

TBTL thrives on its engaged listener community, and this episode is no exception. The hosts share and respond to messages from listeners, including heartfelt thanks, amusing anecdotes, and thoughtful stories.

• Sam Clark from Berlin, Germany expresses gratitude for his support.
• Julie from France shares fun insights about her postcard exchanges.
• Ken Ney from Ypsilanti, Michigan reminisces about past live shows and suggests future events.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Walsh [48:38]: "Sam says hello. I just wanted to dazzle everyone by saying thank you."
• Andrew Walsh [51:40]: "My love of buying postcards in museums has expanded exponentially since joining this group."

These interactions underscore the show's strong sense of community and the hosts' appreciation for their listeners' support.

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Airport Antics: Navigating Newark's Chaos

Luke recounts his recent experience flying through Newark Airport amidst ongoing staffing issues and equipment outages. The story captures the surreal calmness he encountered, juxtaposed with his initial fears of chaotic delays and canceled flights.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Walsh [65:28]: "I was expecting a ghost town. No, because of the fact that there was so few people on my flight."
• Luke Burbank [68:43]: "And again, maybe that caused ripple effects because the technology is working again, but they're still having issues."

Their discussion offers listeners an inside look at the often stressful and unpredictable nature of air travel, presented through their humorous and candid lens.

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Anecdotes and Personal Stories: From Jello to Baseball

The episode is peppered with a variety of personal stories and light-hearted exchanges. Luke shares his first-ever experience making Jello, while Andrew reflects on memorable moments from past baseball games and live shows.

Notable Quotes:

• Luke Burbank [55:30]: "I mixed them together and made a lemon lime. I haven't tried it yet. It just looks green."
• Andrew Walsh [77:06]: "I would have been like, we're doing stuffed crust pizza, everyone from Domino's."

These segments provide a glimpse into the hosts' lives outside the main topics, enhancing the episode's relatability and entertainment value.

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Supporting the Show: Listener Donations and Engagement

In a heartwarming close, Luke and Andrew acknowledge their listeners' generous donations, emphasizing that TBTL is a 100% listener-supported podcast. They humorously navigate through various donor messages, shout-outs, and amusing stories shared by their audience.

Notable Quotes:

• Andrew Walsh [47:04]: "We were hoping for some razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle."
• Andrew Walsh [60:35]: "I have a kid and I haven't made Jello, so I guess I was a bad parent."

This final segment reinforces the strong bond between the hosts and their audience, celebrating the community that sustains TBTL.

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Conclusion: Wrapping Up with Laughter and Anticipation

The episode culminates with a blend of humor, gratitude, and anticipation for future interactions. Luke and Andrew leave listeners with a sense of camaraderie and excitement for what's to come, ensuring that TBTL remains a beloved daily companion for their audience.

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Overall, Episode #4466 of TBTL: Too Beautiful To Live masterfully weaves personal narratives with engaging discussions, all while maintaining a tone that's both humorous and heartfelt. Whether tackling the mundane challenges of medical prep or unraveling the mystery behind "Denny's," Luke and Andrew deliver an episode that's as entertaining as it is relatable.

Transcript

[Luke Burbank]

Through our ceremonies and our rituals, we have witnessed firsthand the awesome and vibratory power of color. We experience it as alive, and we believe that this saturated energy is the basis of all creation. This is not an occult. This is not one of those crazy.

[Andrew Walsh]

Systems of divination and astrology. That stuff's hooey and you gotta have.

[Luke Burbank]

A screw loose to go in for.

[Andrew Walsh]

That sort of thing. Our beliefs are fairly commonplace and simple to understand.

[Luke Burbank]

Humankind is simply materialized color operating on the 49th vibration. You would make that conclusion walking down the street or going to the store.

[Andrew Walsh]

Love it or hate it, it appears to be another irreversible step along mankind's journey toward God only knows what. Hey, I've learned a lesson here, but I hope you all have too, about the vitality of shared experience. We will all remember this moment for the rest of our lives. It was dramatic. It was visual. It was stupid. It was stupid, but it was also theater.

[Luke Burbank]

This is the real thing.

[Andrew Walsh]

This is the necessary art of our time.

[Luke Burbank]

This needs respect. Okay, are we done with the business part?

[Andrew Walsh]

I wanted to start the clown portion of the meeting. Well, all right. Hello, good morning and welcome, everyone, to a Wednesday edition of tvtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. We are living in the midst of a podcast boom. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host.

[Luke Burbank]

I say what's up, Doak?

[Andrew Walsh]

Coming to you from the Madrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia.

[Luke Burbank]

Bring it back home, baby. Bring it back home.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let me tell you, it is a great relief to be back here at the Madrona Hill studio talking to all of you on this Wednesday, albeit a wet Wednesday. I was gone for a good number of days and it is a little gray gardens here in the Matrona Hill studio, which is of course a converted garage. And you know, we put a lot of time and effort and money and energy into making it cozy. But I do think it still has some maybe certain garage like features. Like there were many spider webs.

[Luke Burbank]

Real.

[Andrew Walsh]

Great expectations style out here in the Madrona Hill studio. Spider webs, some bug carcasses, some bugs that came in here, got to have a nice little party and then had their, you know, two to three day lifespan expire. But with all of that being said, I am really, really glad to be here talking to all of you for episode 4465 in a collector series, Let the fun begin. In order to get home yesterday, I had to fly via Newark Airport. Newark, New Jersey. It's part of the greater New York City airport apparatus. And it was a. It was a risky decision, of course, because of all the stuff that's been happening at Newark. Hello, airplanes. Yeah, it's blimps you win by. I will tell you all how that went. Also, you know, my friend Andrew Walsh is about to go into the heavy liquid diet. And by liquid diet, I mean a liquid that makes you have bathroom number two situations.

[Luke Burbank]

Didn't know you like to get wet.

[Andrew Walsh]

Though, in advance of his colonoscopy tomorrow. So we are definitely going to get into that. Speaking of my friend, who is the longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships, he is Andrew Walsh and he is joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

[Luke Burbank]

Good morning, Luke. I think, think that this is episode 4466.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, boy.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, just off by one.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't get off track again.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't usually catch that. But just because you've been traveling, I went and I just like went to the website while you were talking. Sorry to start. It always gets off at a little weird start when I start with a correction. But I also sort of felt like you wouldn't want that living out there. You would feel worse, I think, if I told you later and then you were like, ah, it was wrong on the tape.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't think you know, though, how quickly the people will email us about it. The. They already did. Yeah. In the time between when I said it and when you corrected it, did somebody.

[Luke Burbank]

But somebody just felt something off in the universe?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. Yeah. In fact, they haven't even heard the show yet.

[Luke Burbank]

No.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like we haven't released this to the public, but people are already emailing me through some mystical force.

[Luke Burbank]

Come on, man. I gotta say, I know we'll probably talk more about colonoscopy prep later on in the show. God, that. Is that the worst forward promo that's ever been Forward promo?

[Andrew Walsh]

Not to our listeners.

[Luke Burbank]

I guess not.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think, you know, the demo is aging with us, Andrew, and I think it's true. If we've learned something from my journey into colonoscopy town, it's that maybe it's just our one friend, Phyllis Fletcher, but I get the sense that people, people go with us on this because they are also. They've done it. They're considering. They're thinking about it. So. So I'm here for it.

[Luke Burbank]

Journey to the center of the. Luke is what you called your. You called your procedure. I was going to say that I. Please stop. I saw you pouring coffee. Now I Want to be very clear. As part of my colonoscopy prep, I can drink coffee. I can drink coffee all day. I can drink coffee up until like three or four hours before.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can you drink it at night before going to bed? And that's the ultimate.

[Luke Burbank]

When I fall asleep on my skateboard.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like a person with undiagnosed adhd.

[Luke Burbank]

But. So I'm not drinking coffee right now. But it's not because the diet tells me I can't. As I lead up to this procedure, it's just a. Various other factors. Well, it's kind of partially that. It's partially because I am, I think, now basically starting my kind of fasting or clear liquid diet for the rest of the day. Technically, I think it's supposed to kick in at noon, but whatever, it's. It's 10 o' clock as we record this 10:30 almost. So I'm just, you know, I'm just considering myself in that window now. And number one, I was worried that drinking coffee would make me more hungry. That doesn't happen to everybody. I realize. No, when I drink coffee, at first it, you know, kind of suppresses appetite a little bit. But then if I'm hungry, drinking coffee on an empty stomach, it gets in there, it roils about, it feels lonely. It's bean water. And it makes me. It makes me feel like I have this weird, like, hole in my stomach, sort of. It's my least favorite kind of hunger. Don't do anything out of hunger.

[Andrew Walsh]

Not even drink coffee.

[Luke Burbank]

And so I don't. I always call it that kind of hole in my stomach feeling. And usually when I have that, it's fine, I go grab a snack or lunch usually by that point or something. Right. And so today I was like, I don't want to do that. Also, I think I told you, I think we went into detail on this last episode. I accidentally broke the coffee pot a couple of days ago. So if I were to make it now, I would have had to make it in the French press. And instead I was like, why don't you just focus on making yourself a little bit of breakfast before the. Before the fasting begins. So anyway, I was like, I'm fine without coffee. I. I went the other day without coffee.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wow.

[Luke Burbank]

But I was like, kind of running around town doing projects with Genevieve and, oh, I rented a truck the other day. I was briefly a truck boy. Man, it was so cool. Yeah. But that was fine. But when as I sat down here to do the show, I realized, first of all, I don't Know what to do with my left hand. I have a bottle of water here, but it should be gripping a mug that I sometimes fill from the thermos. And also, I don't think this is usual, but I happen to see you just in the corner of your screen pouring yourself a mug of coffee right there. Don't show it to me. Don't show me your craft. That is cruel and unusual. And I realized I've made a terrible mistake. I should have at least had one cup of coffee during this show.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thought you'd be powered by java this whole week. Because you do. Also, you drink your coffee black. So there's not a lot. I mean, it's. This is the whole payoff for being a person who's been drinking their coffee black for many years is there's almost.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, nothing creamer in it during this time.

[Andrew Walsh]

Actually, I don't. I don't even know the rule on that, but I'm just saying, the fewer complications, the better.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. No, it is. You can't drink. You can't drink dairy during it. That's why they all say, like, coffee, sugar only. But I wasn't paying much attention to that because I don't, you know, and like in my.

[Andrew Walsh]

In the other times when I've done intermittent fasting or I've done various cleanses or things where I'm. I'm denying myself the food that my body so desperately needs. One of the things you can always do, generally, is drink coffee, particularly if you're drinking black coffee. Because, like you referred to it earlier, it's bean water.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

And so I kind of figured. And again, I have the opposite response to you. When I drink coffee, it. In the words of Waxahachie, it quells. It's mine to quell. It quells my hunger, which is why I'm not one of those people who. If I go out to breakfast at a Denny's or something. Do we think Denny's full name is Denzel, but they shorted it to Denny's just to kind of make it more chill, more pancakey.

[Luke Burbank]

This is such a strange take, and it's such a strange place for it to appear. I wasn't expecting. Did Denzel just pop in your head, or is this something you've been pondering for a while?

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know. What's Denny's short for? Maybe Dennis?

[Luke Burbank]

You mean, generally speaking, meets. Meet somebody, and their name is Denny?

[Andrew Walsh]

I've never. I haven't spent any time. I haven't spent any time considering what the Long version of the name Denny is. But anyway, if I. If I was at breakfast, it's entertainment.

[Luke Burbank]

Denny's Pizza, I believe.

[Andrew Walsh]

So I. You just will never find me ordering a cup of coffee with my, like, eggs and hash browns and my breakfast that I'm going to eat. Because for me. And I know that. That I feel like that puts me in a. Kind of. In the minority.

[Luke Burbank]

Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

Because it's a very common sight. If you look around a Denzel's, you just see most people are getting a cup of coffee with their breakfast. That's what people do. For some reason, if I start drinking coffee, it kind of shuts down my hunger mode, and so I don't do that. But anyway, all that is to say, how is it going? Let's just. Let's just talk. Let's talk. Let's talk. The Cream and the Clear. Let's talk about. What's the name again?

[Luke Burbank]

About what's going in or coming out there.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, is that happening yet because of your dietary change? I mean, this is the other thing I just have to say. It's. How do I put this without sounding like I'm. I'm. I'm. I don't know. I'm. I'm describing us in a way that may not be fair or accurate, But I would say, generally speaking, the move is I'm denying myself of something silly. And you're probably just living your life like a normal person. This is the rare thing where I'm having something and you're like, gimme, gimme. You're like, gimme that.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

You're.

[Luke Burbank]

You're like, I'm kidding.

[Andrew Walsh]

Joking. I'm joking. Like, it's rare that I'm over here luxuriating in some kind of a carnal delight like coffee, and you're not. So how has it been for you this week? Because we. We. We doubled up on shows I've been traveling about. I feel like I've lost touch with my friend Andrew a little bit. How have the last couple of days since we recorded been for you in terms of the rules of the game, etc.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, I will answer that question, but first I came up with a fascinating list of names that Denny could be short for Love it. You ready, Dennis? You got that?

[Andrew Walsh]

That's probably the one, now that I think about it.

[Luke Burbank]

Dennis is the first one I thought of.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Denise.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, sure. Yeah. Why did I assume the Denny's was a woman?

[Luke Burbank]

That's right. But Denny's was a woman. Hey, by the way, women can be Denny what's that? What did you say?

[Andrew Walsh]

I said women can be Denny's as well in 2025.

[Luke Burbank]

Denver, apparently, is a name. I didn't know that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Denver. Sure.

[Luke Burbank]

Denzel. Which I think is what you started with. Right. Then there are two here that make me a little bit nervous because they actually start with the letter Z and then a D. And I think they're both Czech names. Janko or Janka. Zd. Zd. Zd.

[Andrew Walsh]

Those can be.

[Luke Burbank]

You have any zd? No, I'm not. Actually. I'm not even really super hungry right now because I did just eat.

[Andrew Walsh]

What about d' Onofrio? Did not just d' Onofrio ever shortened. It's all he's known. Imagine this being someone's first episode of the show.

[Luke Burbank]

So sorry.

[Andrew Walsh]

And then the number of inside jokes that you and I have deployed directly at each other, only for our benefit. I know I'm pretty extreme, but how's it been going for you to. To really kind of modify what you're allowed to eat and things like that? Are you. Are you doing okay?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I'm doing all right. So it's been. It's been very strange because, like you said, not only am I not usually doing some sort of extreme dieting or something like that, but I'm also just somebody who's really bad at food planning. I don't know if you've noticed this, but, like, when you and I are on a road trip somewhere, whether it's a road trip where we got to kind of keep moving, like we did with, I don't know, the RV trip or whatever, or if we're just holding up at some place, some undisclosed location for a week of tbt. Anything along those lines. There's often a moment where, like, if you and I are kinda like, we gotta pull over to the side of the road and eat at that diner or that Applebee's, like, whatever, that's fine. But if it's like, okay, we gotta stock up for the week, we'll go to a grocery store and we'll sort of split up, right? And you get your staples and I get mine. You always make us go to staples, which is weird, but they have such good calligraphy pens.

[Andrew Walsh]

I have a lot of gift cards for there. I'm trying to get through before they close down.

[Luke Burbank]

That's weird.

[Andrew Walsh]

You buy before Shaq repossesses them.

[Luke Burbank]

Dude, how are they still open? There's one by my house. I. There are two that I know of. One sort of by University Village and one by My house kind of by my house up on North Aurora. Both of them are so like empty feeling and maybe not bombed out. Well, yeah, I would say even slightly bombed out. Yet super expensive. Like, you get a pack of like five, eight and a half by 11 envelopes and it's like, oh yeah, no problem, $35. You're like, how is that possible? It's like, well, it's literally the only way we can keep the lights on because everybody else is selling this stuff online and they don't have to keep their lights on.

[Andrew Walsh]

You know, when I was living. When I was first living in Portland, I lived on a street that had a. An off Staples down the street. I think it was a Staple.

[Luke Burbank]

I think it's Stapleton's.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think it was shortened to Staples. I. But here's the crazy part. So it was a Staples that was exactly as you described, generally uninhabited. Seemed like they made most of their money on selling Sharpies and like licorice. Like just the impulse buys as you were checking out, you know. But then next to it was a Taboo video. An adult. An adult video store, which is right. It's maybe right above Staples in terms of things that it's amazing they still exist. Like, I lived in the antiquated store district.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Well, I'll tell you what. The last time I was in the Staples, there was somebody dancing in the back.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Too. It was. Yes, it was a very. It was.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's called vertical integration. It's all owned by the same company. There's. They're finally put it. Putting it together. It's a Staples dancing bear.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. But I guess we got in Staples or Stapletons, because I was saying that, like when we go like in a grocery store, we got to think like, okay, like, you know me, I love grocery shopping. When I'm in my daily life, I have a constant list going. I'm refilling supplies, you know, oh, we're out of eggs or running low on eggs. Like, I do a really good job of keeping track of that stuff. And then I love the process of going to the grocery store, but when it's like, oh, you're going to be spending one week outside of your normal life. Go get ready. Get ready for it. What are you going to want three days from now for dinner or whatever?

[Andrew Walsh]

We know the answer for you. Terrible personal experience.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Land Jaeger.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Well, that's definitely in the car.

[Andrew Walsh]

You've got a lot of Land Jaeger in one of. On one of those road trips.

[Luke Burbank]

A road trip car Snacks I'm better at. Honestly.

[Andrew Walsh]

This is not car snacks.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I'm talking like on the road.

[Andrew Walsh]

But not in the car.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, like we're at. Where were we in Poulsbo the last time near your parents place. You know what I mean? Like there were three of us staying there and we all went to the grocery store and split up and got the thing that we all individually needed. And I can't remember what I get in those situations. Like I know what beer I'm going to get. That's never a problem for me. But like what am I going to get to eat? And like how am I going to plan out how I'm going to be feeling? Or what if I'm feeling snacky here or. And I'm not usually a breakfast person. But sometimes in situations like that you do need to become a breakfast person. Depending on like what your schedule is.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like, is a little bit of it also a concern about food waste. Like as in when you know we're only going to be in the place for a limited amount of time.

[Luke Burbank]

You.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let's say we're flying back. You don't want to buy a bunch of stuff that we're actually. You're not going to get through. So that kind of makes it further complicated.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't think so as much because.

[Andrew Walsh]

That'S an issue for me here at my actual house because I keep going out of town so much. Every time I go to the grocery store I get a little paralyzed because I go. I'm thinking, well, I don't want to buy. I don't want to spend on stuff that I'm just going to come home from a trip and have to throw it out. So then I get a little locked up. But that's not, that's not part of your process.

[Luke Burbank]

I could see that a little. Maybe I get a little bit like that if we're. If these and I are going on a long trip, you know, for a week or two or something and then you have to. You're leaving the house. That is a consideration. Like I don't know if I want to buy this whole thing of lettuce two days before we're going on this trip. But for what I'm talking about now is more like just sort of food planning and just not kind of not being an adult and being like what am I going to need a couple of days from now? What is my mood going to be like midday tomorrow? And like just trying like. Like if I'm at home, there's just my Regular go tos. It might be, well, often, like, if I just need to. That's one thing I've sort of realized about this whole thing, too, is I don't eat very intentionally. I sort of snack a lot during the day. I. Sometimes I eat lunch or maybe I'll get a teriyaki takeout. But a lot of times, like, I'll be done with the show. I'll go upstairs, maybe make myself, like, literally take a half a piece of bread, cut that in half and make a tiny little sandwich out of it, and then eat some celery and peanut butter out of the jar, you know. But like, now it's just like, everything had to be very deliberate.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, girl, you familiar with the girl dinner concept?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I remember it was a thing like, a little while back. Yeah, but. Yeah, but I think a big part of that is, though, you're sort of preparing it and sort of putting it on a kind of. You're plating it in a certain way, even though it's a weird collection of. Maybe Milan. But there's still. I think, girl dinner was like, you put it kind of. You kind of arranged it in a way that was still sort of felt like it was a deal. Whereas I'm, you know, listening to AM radio, standing over the sink, sticking a celery stick into the communal peanut butter. You probably not want to tell Genevieve about that one. But so anyway, that's how I live my life. And so I have not been able to just sort of like, randomly snack. And so because of that, and also I've had kind of a busy couple of days that have kind of changed my schedule, so I've had to be very deliberate. Like, I have had breakfast the last three days. I'm not usually a big breakfast person, but because I was never exactly sure what the next food I was going to eat was, I knew that. I knew that you couldn't eat Cheerios, but you could eat cornflakes. And so I've had cornflakes for the last three days, which is good. Turns out cornflakes are very filling. I hadn't had cornflakes in a minute. And so I've been eating a lot of corn flakes. And then it's like driving in the car. I was doing a lot of driving on Monday, and I always keep, like, mixed nuts in the car. Right. And nuts and seeds are like the main things. Like, you can eat nuts and seeds during this prep period. And so my. Just like, without thinking, just like whenever there's traffic or I'm stopped behind a light that might be when I go for an almond, you know, and I just kind of reach over and grab it all. And I have to keep on reminding myself, nope, that's not it. You have to be intentional about all of this. So it's been okay. It's just really kind of underscored how bad I am at planning and also the sort of uncertainty. I gotta say I'm kind of dreading today. I'm like what like six or eight hours away from having to start drinking the solution that is going to final solution to actively. Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

For your toilet.

[Luke Burbank]

Would that it were. But I. So there's been a lot of sort of unknown about this. And like the closer I get to each phase, like first there was the phase of me not having to do anything but sort of worry about this like over the weekend. Like, well, I know this is coming up. What is this low fiber diet going to be like? Well now I'm basically at the end of the low fiber diet and now I'm getting very close to the part where I'm just fasting and just drinking the liquid. And I feel like I've been reading and rereading the instructions on all of this over and over again just to make sure I'm not making any mistakes and like, sort of like getting prepared, prepared for it. Like I'm doing this, this solution that you have to drink. I know you did the pills but like the instructions for the solution is like mix the solution with warm water so that it all dissolves nicely, then refrigerated and drink it as cold as you can. And so like I've been sort of like back timing everything and just thinking but you can't do, you can't pre make the solution too early, otherwise it starts to. You know, they say like, I don't know, like, but it's like a gremlin.

[Andrew Walsh]

If you make, if you make it too early, it comes to life.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. And that's kind of the thing, I'm sure that there's so much extra built into each one of these steps. It's like you have to. I'm being super, super strict with myself and all of these rules and I'm sure even the rules are like super like kind of overstated, overlapped, like just to make sure that there's no upside.

[Andrew Walsh]

For them of not, of not giving you strict direction. Then that just increases the chances that somebody will mess it up. So they're gonna, they're gonna make everything sound much more extreme than it probably is.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. And I mean, I think I even read somewhere like, hey, listen, if you mess up and eat, like, one thing, like, don't. Don't freak out. Just don't do it again. You know, I'm sure that there's just a lot of, like, kind of double, double caution going on here. So anyway, there's just been a lot of me kind of like. It's like, been a combination of thinking ahead constantly to the next step and sort of worrying about it, like, weirdly. Weirdly, right now I'm not focused on the fact that I'm gonna have to go in tomorrow into, like, you know, I don't like medical settings that. Well. I don't like having to wear one of those little robes. I don't like people probing me weirdly. I'm not nervous about that yet because first I have to get through the digestive phase and I've got to get myself worked up about that, you know? So it's sort of like. It's. It's like coming in waves of. Well, sort of. This is sort of coming in waves of sort of delayed anxiety about things. But I am in the mode now where I feel like I've been thinking. It hasn't even been the diet so much as just the constant thinking and reading and preparing for the next phase and thinking about what I'm eating. And I'm just ready for this to be over. And I don't mean to make it sound like I am suffering in any way. Everything's fine. I am just so looking forward to not having to think about this anymore.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right. Because, like, again, as you've described you, I want to be clear. Like, I think you are much harder on yourself about your, like, dietary habits and things than I think is warranted. Because I've been with you many times, and I think you actually eat healthier than you think. And you do not eat. You know, you often say, I ate so much. And I'm, like, looking at what you ate, which was like a club sandwich at the diner, at the Denzel's that we're sitting at. All that is to say, I think, think your general life is not spending most of your time thinking about your next meal. You just kind of like, you get hungry, you grab the gif. You grab a celery.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Bob's your uncle. So to suddenly have to have that we'll never know. But, like. But so to have that kind of, like, to be, like, suddenly have. Because there are lots of people that, you know, that is a thing that they're doing a lot of the time already. It's like, what are my macros? What are my. I'm. I'm training for this thing, or I'm trying to get this much protein or the blah, blah, blah. It's a. It's a way of being in the world that some people already have a lot of experience with, and it seems like it's not your experience. So that must be a whole other layer of just kind of like, am I doing this right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. And again, sort of the instinct of the weird thing was really I had to take this little can of nuts. I always have this little can of. What is the. What is the brand that makes the almonds? It's like the most common almond brand. If you're on a blue diamond. Yeah, blue diamond. I have these two little, like.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like, they also make my boner pills.

[Luke Burbank]

Blue diamond. Wait, is that.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think that's a slang.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, really?

[Andrew Walsh]

That's. I think. Well, no, I think back in the day, because I think, like, I don't know, one of those things. The original shape of, like, a Viagra or a Cialis or something. It was like a blue, but it was shaped like a diamond, so people were kind of blue.

[Luke Burbank]

I did not know that. I've heard of blue. I thought you're making a blue shoes joke.

[Andrew Walsh]

Have we been approached by blue? Blue Chews?

[Luke Burbank]

No.

[Andrew Walsh]

For this show. Are Ro. Sparks.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, I don't even know that one.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think that's the one that Shannon Sharp was doing. I think that's a partnership that's probably dissolved at this point. But, like, all of those shows were doing some kind of, you know, male enhancement pill commercials for a while.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, we didn't. We did steer clear of that.

[Andrew Walsh]

But anyway, back to your blue diamonds.

[Luke Burbank]

So, anyway, like, I just. It's like in the. It's like these instinctive moments, like, I had to take this little can of, like. I think I have this. I. Describing the canister because I feel like you can picture it if I say it's a blue diamond one, but I actually think it's one that I've, like, kind of refilled because. Because it's like I actually have a bunch of mixed nuts in the house, and I just sort of, like, kind of refill these things and cycle them back in and out of the car. But it is such. It's more of an oral fixation than anything at this point. Like, I get behind a red light, I'm, like, seven cars behind. I think I'm not even going to make this light. Just like instinctively my hand goes to the mixed nuts, right? And I had to move them to a different part of the car. I don't think I've made any mistakes, by the way. I don't think I've slipped up or anything. But it's just sort of like this. This kind of getting rid of these instincts, which maybe in a certain way would be. Maybe I should be more intention during my life and get rid of some of these habits. Maybe I should have taken this opportunity to try to make some lifestyle changes. But like I say right now, I do have a lot of anxiety about this afternoon. So I'm going to start drinking this stuff at.

[Andrew Walsh]

Have you and Genevieve had an important. An important relationship talk?

[Luke Burbank]

I didn't want to, but I did.

[Andrew Walsh]

Do not. Do not. It's basically like, I know Genevieve's office is also downstairs where your office is, but, like, have you established a kind of a DMZ that starts at the top of the stairs? Do you just have the basement as your domain for whatever in God's name is gonna be happening down there starting at 4pm that's really interesting that you.

[Luke Burbank]

Said that, because I did. Sort of, without overthinking it, did tell her that. I'm sorry, I'm distracted because there's a long list of famous people named Denny here, and I don't know any of them. I'm just gonna close that tab.

[Andrew Walsh]

What about.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, do you want to try here?

[Andrew Walsh]

Dennis Franz.

[Luke Burbank]

Dennis Franz would be Dennis Franz. These are all Denny's, though, because I was on the Denny page. So people who go by Denny.

[Andrew Walsh]

Denny. Denny Heck, Republican congressperson from Washington back in the day.

[Luke Burbank]

Let me see if Heck is on here. Oh, I'm. I'm sorry, I'm wrong. They are listing Dennis's. And you have Dennis Hastert here.

[Andrew Walsh]

What about.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, yeah, they don't have though.

[Andrew Walsh]

What about Dennis Farina from Get Shorty Farina?

[Luke Burbank]

I am not seeing. I'm. There's denim. Denham Fouts, 1914-48. Oh, American male prostitute and socialite. Huh?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, sure, sure. Denim.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Denim fouts.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, denim fouls.

[Andrew Walsh]

Denim fouts. Yeah. Denim dense. Sure.

[Luke Burbank]

This is a very strange list. They're switching between Denny's and denims and Dennises and they're leaving other people. I'm gonna close all of these Denny's.

[Andrew Walsh]

Is it called a denim of Dennis's? Did you have more than.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a denizen of denims.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's a Denzel of denizens. All right, back to your conversation with Genevieve.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I hadn't really thought it out too much. I had been thinking like, okay, well, I guess I'll be spending this time because I have, you know, the bathroom that I use is down here anyways, kind of like my space. Not that Genevieve can't use my bathroom.

[Andrew Walsh]

We call it the Chamber of Secrets.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right. And it has little spirits that kind of come up cartoon style from the toilet sometimes. And so I've been sort of. I was sort of vaguely imagining myself, I'm going to be drinking this liquid. I'm going to need a lot of access to the bathroom. You're spending a lot of time in the bathroom. I'll just do this down in the basement. And, you know, there are nights where Genevieve is upstairs watching her shows or whatever, upstairs in the living room, and I'm downstairs in the basement watching baseball and playing darts. Anyway, so there's sometimes a natural separation. Anyway, other times we're both down here watching movies and playing cards or hanging out together. And I was down here the other night and Genevieve was upstairs. And I just had this thought. I'm like, yeah, you know what? I should probably just, while I'm thinking about it, just establish some boundaries. And so I went upstairs. Yeah. I think for your comfort or two nights.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, for both of your comfort, but really for yours.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, because I could really see Genevieve. Genevieve is a. This is gonna be. I might be wrong about how Genevieve is thinking about my journey here. And to be honest with you, Genevieve has a lot going on right now. She is just some really intense stuff at work. Not. Not bad. But just like, you know, the president is retiring and they're bringing in a new president. I mean, this is all right. It's so much is just falling on her plate right now. Like, she's just so busy with work. We have this ongoing situation with our cat, Professor Bananas, and you know what her health situation is. And there's just been. Just a lot going on with her. So I don't think she's spending a lot thinking about how we're gonna spend, you know, Wednesday night, or the pooping hour, as we like to call it. No, we don't. So I don't even know if it was on her mind, but I could see her being a sort of project oriented person, being like, hey, so you're about to start this one. You know, I could see her being interested in the process, not from almost.

[Andrew Walsh]

Details, but like almost medical perspective.

[Luke Burbank]

Almost medical, but also like, hey, like, let's you know, I could just see her being like, well, do you want to watch a movie together or something? You know what I mean? To pass the time. Like, I don't know. So I don't know that that would have ever entered her thought process, but I decided just to get in front of it. And I broke up with her the other night. I said, I honestly can't be too careful.

[Andrew Walsh]

I said, cannot be too careful.

[Luke Burbank]

You must leave. I said, I break with the. I break with the. No. I just went upstairs, and out of the blue, I just said, hey, these. I was just thinking about something, like, no offense, but, you know, Wednesday, when I'm drinking that stuff, I think I'm probably just going to want some privacy downstairs. If we can sort of make that my. My lair on Wednesday night. And I think she looked up from her. What is the modern Colombo called now? The one with T. Leone.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, Tele Leone is in a new Columbo.

[Luke Burbank]

It's not Tail Leone. I'm messing this up so bad. She's very famous. She was in Russian Doll, and she plays the detective who can read people's lives.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Natasha Leon.

[Luke Burbank]

Natasha Leone. I was wondering why I got to dia Leone there. What is her. That. That show, whatever. It's called Poker Face. Very much like, oh, but it's not.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's not. But it's not called Columbo. It's not the reboot of Columbo, but it's for all intents and purposes.

[Luke Burbank]

And I will say every. I love Columbo so much, and I think I'm this. You know, people don't. People love it when we love the stuff that they love. So I'm not gonna. You know, I didn't watch a whole bunch of Poker Face, but I watched, like, I think one episode, and maybe it was the buildup for it. Everybody's like, you love Columbo so much. You're gonna love this show so much. And, you know, it's. Well, here I go. Who's the. Who's the showrunner? It's the. It's the famous director you and I like who did Bradley and some of the stars.

[Andrew Walsh]

Ryan Johnson.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. And so, you know, there's all of these elements that I like, and I like Natasha Leon, despite my not remembering her name. It's a compliment when I don't remember your name, by the way. But I'd heard so much good stuff. But then when I started watching it, I was like, oh, I didn't realize. She's actually sort of almost doing a Columbo. Have you watched that show at all? She does gesticulations, and she sort of even. I mean, I know she's got a husky voice, but I feel like she's doing a Columbo. And it turned me off.

[Andrew Walsh]

I watched the first episode and I had the same experience, maybe, that you had, which is. I had heard so much about it and so much kind of hype, and it felt to me a little bit like I wanted every character to dial it down by 10%. Everyone was being the most of that character. They were being. And doesn't she work at a shitty casino, at least in the first episode? And she lives in a. Wait, wait, because. Am I thinking of two different shows? Because I remember the Open of Poker Faces at a party in, like, a New York City apartment. Right? That's the Open of Poker Face. But then we cut to. I have this other memory of her. Isn't she, like, working at a casino as a cocktail waitress? Are these different. Is one Tea Leone and one Natasha Leone? Like, how am I. I feel like those are all from the first episode of Poker Face. Anyway, somewhere in all of that, I just kind of lost. I lost my interest.

[Luke Burbank]

It's my understanding that she does work at a casino. I'm looking up to confirm it, but honestly, whatever Saw didn't really involve.

[Andrew Walsh]

Is there a. No, no, no. You know what? There's. Sorry. Is there a different show where she's like, Groundhog Day? She's stuck in a party.

[Luke Burbank]

That's Russian Doll.

[Andrew Walsh]

Russian Doll.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's why I was trying to think of her name.

[Andrew Walsh]

So I was. I was combining Russian Doll and Poker Face. I've watched the first episode of both Andrews.

[Luke Burbank]

I really liked Russian Doll. That might have been one that. That's like a. A limited series with, like, a very specific narrative arc that I feel like I might have watched on a plane or while I was traveling and things. Always.

[Andrew Walsh]

Perfect environment a little bit.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I think it was a per. So I never quite trust myself because there's things that I've watched in kind of impacted or a short period of time on a flight or something, and I think it's really good. And then I revisit it later, and I'm just like this.

[Andrew Walsh]

You know what that was for me? Watching the television reboot of Get Shorty, starring Chris o' Dowd and Ray Romano. And I watched it when you and I were flying to Australia. You loved it and I loved it. I haven't revisited it, but I'm saying I can't I can't separate. I can't separate if it was such a good show or if I was in the perfect environment somewhere over Bora Bora.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm glad to hear you say that because I thought you're gonna say that because you've been talking about how much you enjoyed that. What it is kind of a surprise sleeper. You thought it was for yourself, I guess. And then I thought you're gonna say that now you've rewatched and you don't like it. Maybe you should never rewatch it. Keep it.

[Andrew Walsh]

I will never.

[Luke Burbank]

In your head.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I barely watch things for the first time, let alone the second time, so that's. That. That one's safe. But also. But just the fact that I was on the airplane I think heightened the experience a little bit.

[Luke Burbank]

So all of that is to say Genevieve looked up from her poker face and said, that's fine. And then that was the end of the conversation.

[Andrew Walsh]

I mean, so that starts today at 4.

[Luke Burbank]

So starting at 4. And then I think Genevieve also has some meetings. She's. She's probably not going to be home probably until late in the evening anyway.

[Andrew Walsh]

Anna Marie Kaus has also asked Genevieve not to come in the basement for the next week.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's happening across a spectrum of experiences for her, I have to say. Like, I'm glad for you that that's. I'm glad you had that talk, even if it was unnecessary because, you know, this was. I moved my entire appointment once essentially because of this same issue, which was the original plan was I was gonna stay the night at Becca's and then head all the way down to like a pretty far away location to have the procedure. And then when I talked to the nurse and then I decided, oh, and here's what it was. I decided I didn't wanna stay at Becca's, which is a lovely one bedroom apartment that has one bathroom. I was like, that is not gonna preserve the mystery that we need in this relationship. So I said, I'm gonna just stay at my place and I'm just gonna drive down in the morning. And then I told the nurse who was doing. Did you have to do, by the way, a week out pre screening with a nurse like I did?

[Luke Burbank]

No, that's a good point. No, I didn't do that. The doctor just said, because I kind of switched doctors somewhat recently and kind of my rheumatologist became. This is such an old man conversation. I was seeing that rheumatologist because of my joint stuff. And then I realized I didn't want to go back to my old doctor because he didn't do me good. And this guy practices, like, family medicine as well. So I just said, hey, can you be my. Will you be my forever doctor? And he was like, yeah. So we had my first appointment with him being my forever doctor. And he said, well, you should probably get a colonoscopy. Or I said to him, I'm like, I need a colonoscopy. He's like, yep, that was the first thing on my list, too. So that was it. He just. Just passed my number along, and they started calling me.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, I had to do a check in with a nurse a week out, and I. She was looking at my home address, and she was looking at where the procedure was happening, and she basically said, I don't think it's a great idea for you to have to drive that far on the morning of.

[Luke Burbank]

This was just over the phone, though, or was this in person? Yeah, over the phone. Okay. Yeah. No. Oh, you know what? Yeah. Somebody did call me to walk me through the prep a few weeks ago, I think maybe. Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, there you go.

[Andrew Walsh]

I. But all that is to say, basically, I ended up rescheduling the whole thing to a place closer to my house so that I could drive there in the morning. All of this was because. And Becca was very much not invited to come up here and hang out with me, even though now there are a couple of places in the house where I could use the facilities if need be. It's just the kind of thing that for my own comfort, I needed to know that I could just essentially cloister myself away and do whatever. Whatever unholy things needed to happen, you know, and so I'm glad that you're going to have that same. My only sadness for you is that the Mariners are playing a day game today, because it'd be a perfect time to post up with your Mariners in the. In the bathroom. Bring. You know, bring some black coffee. Actually, I don't even know if you can have black coffee anymore. Once that. Once that. Once the waterworks start, I think you can.

[Luke Burbank]

I think you have black coffee almost to the. Until you have to stop eating anything or consuming anything. But, yeah, I was. I sort of realizing that, too. For a second yesterday. I thought the Mariners game was going to be on during my colonoscopy. I think I was just. Again, I've been sort of, like, thinking ahead on things, and then sometimes I get my wires crossed. And so at one point, last Time, like, dang it, I'm going to be going under, like, right as the game is beginning. But that is not entirely true. I don't even know if they have a game tomorrow. But yeah, I probably will miss today's.

[Andrew Walsh]

I wonder how long it's going to take you. I guess we'll find out on Friday to come out of it because I came out of it remarkably quickly. And what I mean is the, like, even just the. Again, remember my fear going in was that as I came out of the Whatever is the propofol, the thing that puts you under. I was going to say some very regrettable things. I was going to admit to some crimes that are currently unsolved. And people who I talked to said it's actually not really like that. Like, you'd be surprised. And yeah, I just came out like there was not very much time between when, like they woke me up and then when I had most of my wits about me, you know what I mean? Like, it was five minutes, if that. And then I got a ride home from Becca. But even that felt like I thought, man, If I stayed 20 more minutes, I could have driven myself. I.

[Luke Burbank]

For some reason. And again, it might be because I'm still a day out and a big hurdle out. You know what I mean? Like, I'm kind of focusing on what is tonight gonna be like for me as I do my best imitation of a colon blow commerc. But for some reason, the actual going in to the medical facility and getting the procedure so far hasn't been causing me at least a lot of front of mind anxiety. And I think part of that is because I did have that surgery on my hand after I busted it up like a couple of years ago. And that's still like a pretty.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's much more gruesome than this.

[Luke Burbank]

But I mean, the process of, like going in there and then giving you a robe and then being like out of all the awkwardness ahead of time and then remember, the doctor had to wreck on my hand just to. I mean, it's pretty clear which one was all busted up. But he installed the right on the hand pre op to make sure that he operated on the right hand. Wonder if they're gonna do that to my butt tomorrow. It's this. But it's this butt.

[Andrew Walsh]

There's an arrow pointing.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, exactly.

[Andrew Walsh]

Not the front, but the back butt.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right. But. But maybe because of all of that and I have gone under. Remember I had a couple of mouth surgeries where for the second one, I Asked him. I'm like, you gotta put me totally under for this one this time. It was pretty, pretty, pretty tough the first time around. And so anyway, I've had a couple of experiences in the past, like five or 10 years where I've been fully knocked out for some sort of medical procedure. So for some reason that part isn't as, I don't know, like, kind of front of mind for me right now. Maybe it will be when I'm rolling in and grabbing my butt like one of those people in the Pepto Bismol dance commercial when they say diarrhea. That's going to add another factor of me going in there if I need to. Like, I don't know if I get to the. For you now, again, you took the, the pills, but it's supposed to do the same thing. It's supposed to clear you out. Like, you. The only thing I remember you saying about your process was it wasn't quite as intense as you thought it was going to be. You thought you would kick in right away and you'd run to the bathroom like a Looney Tunes character kicking up dust behind you and spend your days in there. Did you really not spend long periods of time on the throne?

[Andrew Walsh]

I did not spend long periods of time in the bathroom. It was. And I did not ever have an acute pain that was like, I'm running to the bathroom. There were obviously some moments where my body said, okay, it's time to go do this. But then, you know, it was. I mean, I'm probably forgetting how many trips I made. There was probably a lot of trips, but I just didn't. It didn't play out the way that I was thinking it was going to based on all the hype. Now, part of that, I wonder is because I did not have gallons of liquid in my stomach. See, that's the difference. Like, I would, I would venture that for a lot of people, if you were to just drink two gallons of anything, you might have a bathroom situation. Because your body's not used to just having like, oh, from huge volume, the volume of liquid. Because if you think about it, you take the pills and you, you know, you drink a little bit of water, but it's not the volume. You're not putting like 2 gallons of a solution into your stomach. You're putting like a bunch of pills and then you, like, kind of stay hydrated. But, like, so I don't, I can't really, I can't speculate on what your experience is going to be. Mine was not Nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be. Also, Andrew, update. The Mariners do not have a game on Thursday. So you. This is. But. But this is what you. When they're wheeling you in or when. When you're hitting that moment. And again, I had this too when I was in the gown and they were kind of doing the intake and I was. They were about to. Oh, it was actually really. When they were wheeling me into the room to actually have the procedure and there's all these kind of. It's, you know, kind of a surgical room. There's all these bright lights and there's a lot of equipment and there's multiple people. I had a moment of being like, oh, okay, this is a. This is a whole thing. And then it was totally fine. So you'll probably also have that moment of being like, oh, this is a whole thing. Which could be a little overwhelming, but just keep your eyes on the prize. And for you, my friend, that's Friday night Mariners against the San Diego Padres. Mariners starting pitcher, tbd. Because Bryce Miller is the ir.

[Luke Burbank]

Did they send Miller to the IR now?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Elbow swelling.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay.

[Andrew Walsh]

But Friday night, you'll be all done with this. You'll have all of the. You know, everything will be out of your system and you'll be like, you can. You can. You could just have a normal. Like have a couple of beers, watch the Mariners. Like, Friday night's gonna be a dream night for you. So as they're wheeling you in and as you see them unspooling something that looks like they use it at Roto Rooter for your body, just remind yourself, just say, there's no place like home. Click your heels together, and before you know it, it'll be Friday night at 6:40 West coast that the Mariners will be taking on the San Diego podcast.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. In a certain way, especially the way you described that. And this has been sort of on the back of my mind, although I don't know if I put it into words. Part of me does wish I had been doing this whole thing on a Friday instead of a Thursday. Cause it'd be nice if I could get through this, and then that's the last thing of my week. Not that doing a TBTL with you in the morning is. Is onerous. Is it onerous? No, that's too strong of a word. Off putting, no.

[Andrew Walsh]

Pudding. But you don't.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, it would be nice if this were the cap of my week and then, like, I get done with this procedure on Friday and then I'm Done for the week. I think I mentioned this to you.

[Andrew Walsh]

The fact that you still have to do a hey Dummies video, I mean, that's hanging over.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, technically it's your turn. But.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, I know that was the nature of that joke.

[Luke Burbank]

I think I said to the listeners earlier, too, I might just don't do a newsletter. I might. Yeah, I keep. I always feel guilty when I don't do one. But, yeah, I might just skip the newsletter.

[Andrew Walsh]

Should I write it this week?

[Luke Burbank]

You know, the thing is, if you write it, there's still a lot of ins and outs of then me having to build it and then a video. Even if you record a video, I have to edit it and do all that stuff. Like, it's just kind of like if you start to pull on that string, then I'll just do it. You know what I mean?

[Andrew Walsh]

How about just emailing everyone a picture of your lab chart?

[Luke Burbank]

I was thinking about just emailing everyone a link to the Colon Blow video that I keep on referring. There you go. 1991 snatch.

[Andrew Walsh]

Phil Hartman.

[Luke Burbank]

Can I. While we're just on this topic, let me just tell you one other thing that has been on my mind about this drink. So there's various. The drink that I have to drink to kind of clear my bowels, Right. Like, the thing is, I'm hearing just so much input from so many listeners. It's been really, really helpful because everybody. It reminds me, first of all that, like, I'm the last person in the world to even do this. Like, everybody's done this apparently already. I have a friend who had not go gone to the doctor in like 30 years. I'm not even exaggerating. And he finally just went to the doctor not all that long ago, and he's already gotten his colonoscopy. And he was giving me some advice the other day, and I was kind of like, how does this dude. How has this guy got into his colonoscopy before me? So I know, I know I'll be fine. But there's all these different things, and everybody's sort of got their theories about the mixture you have to drink. And I got what I thought was some really good advice from some listeners who said, mix your mixture not with water, but with actual Gatorade. It'll make the thing taste better. And some other people said, you could even do it with Sprite. But I've been very cautious about this. And I've googled that or various versions of that, like, can I do this a million times? And what I'M learning is different people, even if you're doing a liquid thing, different people have. Are prescribed different solutions. And the one that I see a lot of people mixing with Gatorade is like Miralax or something. But that's not my journey. I'm on something called Sue Flav and I don't know if that's how you flave S U F L A V E. And nowhere do I see anybody online saying it's okay to mix this. You know what I mean? And I'm. I'm again being very cautious. It's not two gallons, luckily. It's maybe. Maybe it's like a. It's. I don't even think it's a. It's two big bottles, one I gotta drink tonight, one tomorrow morning. But I don't even think either one of them is a half a gallon, to be honest with you. And you're supposed to.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, and that's mixed. You don't have to add to that. That's it.

[Luke Burbank]

And that. Well, the. It was kind of interesting how it came. It actually came with two big plastic bottles with a big mixture. And then I just had to add a flavor pack and then water and then shake it up and add it. And I really. I love Gatorade so much that I wanted to add Gatorade in there, but I just was. I don't know how that could mess up the. You know what I mean? Is Gatorade going to deactivate the medicine? Probably not, but I was just too scared to do it because aside from hearing from listeners, I couldn't find any evidence that that is actually an okay procedure. So I am also a little bit in my head about everybody talking about how terrible this stuff tastes. And I think maybe once I just try it down the ha. Get it down the hatch. But you're supposed to drink it in like 1 cup intervals for every 15 minutes or something like that and then drink a lot of water alongside of it. So I don't think I can just chug the whole thing. But I have a feeling. Unless it's really, really bad and it activates like my gag reflex. My guess is it's the unknown that is making this. So like, I bet you the second cup won't be as.

[Andrew Walsh]

Do you want to have some right now live on air so we can. And get your react.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I don't want to mess up. I don't want to mess up the process. But. But anyway. So that's where we are in there.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like the Joel M. The Joel Embiid of.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right.

[Andrew Walsh]

Crapping your pants. Trust the process.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right.

[Andrew Walsh]

We was hoping for some razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle. That's right, man. Razzle dazzle. On your mark. On your mark.

[Luke Burbank]

Get set, get set now.

[Andrew Walsh]

Ready, ready, go, everybody. Razzle dazzle. Let's thank some dazzling donors. These folks are donating their hard earned money to TBTL voluntarily. They don't have to do it. They choose to do it. And we really appreciate it. This is 100% listener supported podcasting. I've been bopping around the country and I usually try to listen to the local public radio station in whatever town I'm in. And what I've noticed, but I still listen on my phone. You know, I just go to listen live. Live to whatever their app is. Every single one of these public radio stations is now starting with a intense pre roll. Somebody from the station saying, hey, times are tough. Because in fact, times are tough. And so we feel really grateful that this is somehow still working. It's keeping us in souffle money. And it's only thanks to folks like Sam Clark, who's in Berlin, Germany.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, international.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exciting. Very exciting. Sam says hello. I just wanted to dazzle everyone by saying thank you. Firstly to my fabulous 10 cousin Julie from France, who got me into TBTL. What is going on in this family? These international.

[Luke Burbank]

We are taking over Europe.

[Andrew Walsh]

We are one person in this family as a time, whether it's French Julie or German Sam.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right.

[Andrew Walsh]

The next message is a big thank you to all of the TBTL Christmas card exchange tens out there. My love of buying postcards in museums has expanded exponentially since joining this group. Every year I get to make a new make believe story behind each of the people I send these cards to. I also get to learn where places like Onalaska are and go down. Fantastic Wikipedia rabbit hole. So my take from that is we have a listener who's in Unalaska and that Sam was corresponding with that person.

[Luke Burbank]

Has Unalaska come up on the show recently? Or was I just.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, there's two now. I. Now here's the thing. There's. There's Unalaska and then there's a place called Onalaska. Well, here's what I will say. There's a place not that far from me called Onalaska with an O, which is a unique name. But then is there also a place called Unalaska? Like this is so not Alaska. We can't even believe it. Is there an Unalaska and an Unalaska. Or are these the same place?

[Luke Burbank]

U N, A L, A S, K A, as Sam says spells it here. Sorry. The city of Unalaska is the main population center of the Aleutian Islands. Yes.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, so there's an Unalas. Alaska. Alaska. And then there's an. On Alaska. Somebody moved to. On Alaska, Washington. And then do a card exchange with Sam, please, so that he can.

[Luke Burbank]

On Alaska. I've never heard of that. And where is that in Washington? I'm taking near me. Oh, it's just near you. By lacrosse Regional Airport. No kidding.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. On Alaska, Washington. It's in Lewis County. Louis.

[Luke Burbank]

No kidding.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. I didn't know there was a. Wait, no, you're looking at the one that's in Wisconsin. Johnson.

[Luke Burbank]

Me? No, I'm looking at one in Washington and.

[Andrew Walsh]

Really? Because lacrosse. Well, lacrosse.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, that might have been. I'm sorry. On the Google thing, I was looking at that. Then I went into the. Washington.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. On Alaska. Washington is.

[Luke Burbank]

Is.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's along State Route 508 in Washington. I didn't know there was an. On Alaska. Wisconsin, too.

[Luke Burbank]

I like this. Are you looking at the etymology? The Pleasures of hope. That's the poem that comes from. The name of the community comes from the poem the Pleasures of Hope by Scottish poet Thomas Campbell. The place referenced in the poem was called Unalaska, with two O's, it looks like, which was then shortened. The name was given to a lumber town in Arkansas. After that was a success. The next operation in Wisconsin, also named Onalaska. And the name became a company tradition. There you go.

[Andrew Walsh]

Whoa. Oh, wait. So a company tradition. So I wonder if Onalaska, Washington is. I wonder if that company. That timber company was doing some work down there. If this is. This is actually quite fascinating.

[Luke Burbank]

It really is.

[Andrew Walsh]

Hey, Sam, thank you for this. Thank. I mean, this isn't really. We're not even talking about the place you're talking about, but I have. This is really interesting to me. So, first of all, I love that that's the backstory for the name.

[Luke Burbank]

So it was a company town, literally. Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

The Carlisle Lumber Company Company.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay.

[Andrew Walsh]

And I mean, it would be shocking if the one in Washington state near me is not also related to this. Right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I think that's what this line says. After that was. It says the name was shortened to a lumber town in Arkansas. After that was a success. The next operation in Wisconsin was also named that. And then the name became a company tradition with towns in Wisconsin. Oh, and Texas still survives.

[Andrew Walsh]

See, they don't Reference the Washington one. But that would be. I mean, come on. There is no way that that's not the same story of the Watch.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, wait. Yeah. No. But we're on the Onalaska Washington page, which is why. Yeah. So I think it's a given. Okay. Wow.

[Andrew Walsh]

What a cool backstory.

[Luke Burbank]

I should have had coffee.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sam, thank you very much for leading us on that journey of discovery. And it. It doesn't stop there. Sam says your messages and the creativity of your cards decorate my household every year. And I'm grateful. I'm extremely grateful for all of the messages. In closing, anything. I'd like to share a recipe for Austrian goulash.

[Luke Burbank]

This sounds so good.

[Andrew Walsh]

There's not literally. Well, maybe the beef broth. I don't think there's anything on this list you can currently consume, Sir.

[Luke Burbank]

Nope.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's seven. It's 0.75 liters of beef broth. It's a quarter liter of red wine. That's, you know, to taste, I'd say do follow your heart. 2.2 kg of onion. Onions. 2.2 kg of beef. Here's how you prep it. You dice the beef. You dice the onions. You brown the beef, you add the broth, you bring to a boil. You add the wine, you cook it with it on top, a top for 10 minutes. So you put a top on the pot, you take off the lid, you simmer for six hours. You're going to want to start this.

[Luke Burbank]

The house is going to smell so good.

[Andrew Walsh]

But that's really like. See, this is classically. You know me, I probably wouldn't be making a beef broth goulash, generally speaking, speaking. But, but, but with recipes, this is the kind of thing that usually happens. I would have read the first 90% of this recipe. And I've got people coming over, and I would. Let's say people are showing up at 5. I would have started this at 4. And then only after doing all of the. Everything on the list, I would have noticed the literal last direction, which is simmer for six hours.

[Luke Burbank]

Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

I would have been like, we're doing stuffed crust pizza, everyone from Domino's.

[Luke Burbank]

Do you know what I did made yesterday for the first time? I haven't eaten any of it yet, but. And I'm not trying to. To flex my culinary skills here, but for the very first time in my life yesterday, I made jello, because that's one of the things that I kind of consumed today on my clear broth diet or whatever, liquid diet. And I. It occurred to me, like, I don't really like Jello that much. I would never eat it recreationally. My only association with Jell O is sometimes eating it as a kid and when, when you're sick, you know. So I don't think I ever like, really. With the exception of a special kind of like layered Jello that my grandma used to make, I was never a big Jello person and so I certainly never like bought it. And yesterday I'm at the grocery store just like, I didn't even know what aisle to look for Jello in. It turns out Jello is as big, is such a big part of the grocery store that it gets its own little label on the. On the aisle sign. Have you ever bought Jello before? I bet you you've never bought Jell O before.

[Andrew Walsh]

Not that I can remember. And I won't. I don't want to say why because I don't want to. I don't want to, you know, I don't want to yuck your yum. But at some point as a kid I learned about, you know, kind of what the. What, what some of the building blocks of Jello were. And I was kind of like, I don't think it's literally that, but I do think that there's some carotene in there that is animal based that I was like it just when I. Back when I, you know, would eat anything, I just kind of got a little. Now that. That's never stopped me from doing a Jello shot at the Eagle. So clearly I've got situational ethics on this. But no, I have not bought Jello. But what color, what flavor and color did you go with?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, that. This is another thing where like I'm being, I'm erring on the side of ca. All of this like every, like starting even a couple of days ago, it's like I have to avoid any kind of dyes that are red and blue. Everything says red and blue.

[Andrew Walsh]

Jello is famously not dyed any.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, that's all natural coloring and flavoring. But the thing is, I've been avoiding orange as well. Like in like, because I bought a bunch of Gatorade for today as well. And like, I was like, what about orange? And like, there's no. You know what I mean? It's like the things that are like, yes, are. Are you can drink yellow Gatorade or white Gatorade. And the things that are no are red and blue. And that this is why I'm googling things. Somebody had posted a comment somewhere that I was a Little confused by kind of saying, oh, it looks like Andrew's doing his own research on this. I would just do what the doctor told him. I'm not, like, quote unquote, doing my own research to try to find loopholes and do more. I'm doing my own research to make sure I'm narrowing down what I consume to err on the side of caution. Because I. I'm just thinking, all right, you said no red or blue, but, like, how do I know they're not putting red dye in something that ends up being orange? Like orange Gatorade or orange Jello? So to answer your question, I got a box of green, I got a.

[Andrew Walsh]

Box of yellow, and that lime, probably.

[Luke Burbank]

That'S kind of one's lime, one's yellow. You know what I did? I mixed them together and made a lemon lime. I haven't tried it yet. It just looks green. I thought I was doing something fun. I should have made it two separate ones and then combined them in a plate or something and made it look funny or fun. But this was my first jello experience. I just couldn't believe that I.

[Andrew Walsh]

Is it jiggling?

[Luke Burbank]

It's jiggling now because I made it last night. And I think this is. Again, probably there are people who are like, how could you have never made Jello until you're 48 years old? And I think that's a big thing about not having kids. You know what I mean? Like, jello. For myself, I'm not going to a lot. Not bringing, like, ambrosia to a lot of, like, you know, garden parties or wherever you take ambrosia. So it's like, why would I have made Jello before this?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's a good point. Also, I had a kid and I haven't made Jello, so I guess I was a bad parent. But anyway, well, Sam, thank you very much for the support and the recipe and all of it. We appreciate you. Enjoy those postcards from Onalaska or Unalaska or wherever they happen to arrive from. Maestro, on your mark.

[Luke Burbank]

On your mark.

[Andrew Walsh]

Get set, get set.

[Luke Burbank]

Now. Ready?

[Andrew Walsh]

Ready, Go. Everybody rattles dazzle. Now do the story of Ypsilanti Andrew Ypsilanti, Michigan, where our buddy Kenneth Nay is from. Long time longtime friend of the program, Live event attendee, friend to all, it's Ken Ney. We love Ken. Ken says hi, Luke, Andrew and John. I was happy to be able to stay at a dazzling donor for the second year in a row. Now coinciding with your independence from apm. Thanks Ken, we appreciate it, man. I'm still very glad with how things have gone since you left. One thing I would like to see more of is live shows. We'll see. I said live show attendee.

[Luke Burbank]

That's right.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, watch this space, Ken. Watch this space. That's all I can say about that. That's all I'm authorized to say about that. I've signed. Andrew's made me sign a lot of non disclosure agreements for some reason. I'd like to see more live shows, especially in the Midwest. I have traveled all over the country to see tbtl, but a show in Ohio or Michigan would be very cool. I've procrastinated in sending in this message, but it does allow me to comment on a recent show. By the way, this is an interesting approach from Ken because people sometimes try to think, what am I going to write in this thing? And then people also like to throw their phones and sometimes clarify or correct things via email. And sometimes we read those things, sometimes we don't. If you wait long enough to write your dazzling donor message, first of all, if you donate at a dazzling donor level and then you wait to write your message, you can use the this as a way to force us to read whatever it is you want us to say, right?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

There's a decent number of emails that might sort of fall into the abyss, but not if it's a dazzling donor message.

[Luke Burbank]

I guess you could make us look real silly. You could make us. You could do whatever you want if.

[Andrew Walsh]

You just want it. Yeah. Or just correct us on something or clarify anything that. I mean, again, this is a fast pass. This is. Oh, by the. I don't even have time to get into this right now. We went to this karaoke joint when we were all in Las Vegas over the weekend and it was really interesting. I didn't put in for a song, but a lot of people in our group did and nobody got to sing for like, we're going on two hours and people have gone up a couple of times and people who got there after us have been singing and it's just like, what is going on? And we look over and we realize, oh, these people are all paying $100 through an app at the bar to move to the front of the line. They had a fast pass at the karaoke bar in Las Vegas.

[Luke Burbank]

Were there people there with a little clear stand saying, anybody want to join?

[Andrew Walsh]

Clear.

[Luke Burbank]

Anybody want to join? Clear.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

I was nuts.

[Andrew Walsh]

100 bucks too, but nuts. Anyway, that's not what we're here to talk about. We're here to talk about the rest of Ken's message. And this is what Ken says. I want a comment on a recent show, Andrew inspired me to look at the now music CDs. I have a CD player that I like to use in my car, especially on road Trips. I bought now 90s, which includes recent hits like Beautiful Things by. Wait. Oh, now 90. Not 90s.

[Luke Burbank]

Now 90.

[Andrew Walsh]

So the 90th. No, no, the 90th edition.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, okay. Oh, I see.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like, it's the 90th CD they've put out, maybe. Because the. The song that he's referencing, it's got recent hits like Beautiful Things by Benson Boone. You know that one, Andrew, right?

[Luke Burbank]

No, I don't. That's why I assumed it was a 90s song.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, it's like, duh, take these Beautiful Things. I don't really love the song, but it's a. And Benson Boone's from Washington State. I think he's from Maple Valley or something.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, really?

[Andrew Walsh]

I think he was on one of those singing shows and. And now is a big star. Anyway, he's a. He's a. He's a. He's. He's a quite physical specimen. I think he. I don't know. I'd be guessing. I think he might do a backflip on stage or something.

[Luke Burbank]

Really? Oh, this is all new to. To me.

[Andrew Walsh]

Or also Used to Be Young by Miley Cyrus. That one, I don't know. So I'll spare the listeners my rendition. So the now CDs are still going strong. I also got the now 2010s because it is the best songs of the decade and will be fun to listen to while driving this summer. I'm very thankful to have this podcast and community to help me get through the next four years. Good luck to all. Power out from Ken.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, thank you, Ken. Appreciate it. It's always great seeing you. You.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, man.

[Luke Burbank]

At these events. And I always have to, you know, remind everybody about the time you were banging on the glass windows of a restaurant. Asking. Holding a knife inside, I think. Asking for a knife.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think.

[Luke Burbank]

Right. I just want a knife. Because we wanted to cut a cake after the Florida show. Anyway. Good times.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that was in. That was Florida. See, I think I've. I think I've. Not unlike Poker Face and Russian Doll, I think I've blended that into an Austin show. But that wasn't the Austin show. That was a Florida show.

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, that's my memory of it. But this is not exactly, you know, you And I are.

[Andrew Walsh]

We had a cake. Yeah, we had a cake.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that was definitely. Yeah, I guess so because. Because the cake was brought to the Waffle House and then we took it to that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah. Yeah, good point. That was really fun. That Waffle House. That went so much better. I didn't have low expectations, but it exceeded my expectations.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that was. That was really fun.

[Andrew Walsh]

It was. Ken, thanks again. Appreciate you.

[Luke Burbank]

Hello, and welcome to Top Story.

[Andrew Walsh]

All right, I'll keep this relatively brief because we're already past the hour mark and we've got lots to do today, but I did fly through Newark yesterday, and, you know, that's, of course, the airport that's been going through all of these sort of staffing issues with the air traffic controllers and. And the flights were being canceled left and right. And I noticed something that was in one way very encouraging, but in another way very, very discomfiting, Andrew, which is, you know, because I am always trying to get upgraded into first class, I'm extremely aware of what the. How many first class tickets have already been sold. When, in fact, when I book a flight, sometimes I'll book. If there's two flights that are kind of similar in their timing. And one, I have to go to Seattle and then the place I'm going to, but the Seattle to the other place when there's like five seats in first class available, but then the. The other one, there's like one seat, I will actually change my trip so that I'm on the flight that has more capacity in first class. That's how. That's how kind of broken my brain is now these days. The other day when I looked at this flight from Newark to Portland, I don't know how many seats there are. Let's say there are 20 seats in first class or something. There were 19 available seats. There might have been as many available seats in first class class as there were people on the entire airplane. Like, it was wild. The layout of this flight, which was exciting because I thought, good chance I'll get to go up in first class. But was also made me nervous because I thought, are they going to even do this flight? Like, all the smart money had moved away from the Newark airport, is what I figured out. Like, if. If you were somebody who had the option to say you were flying for work or you just had the resources and you could. In fact, I noticed something on the Alaska website yesterday as I was in the lift going to the airport, which also freaked me out, which was they're basically offering free get out of your Newark flight passes for anyone. Like if you were, if you're flying out of Newark, Alaska Airlines was more than happy for you to just like cancel the ticket, move the ticket, whatever, do the ticket later. Like they were creating maximum flexibility for people around the topic of Newark.

[Luke Burbank]

I haven't done a lot of reading on this. In fact, I didn't really know about this phenomenon until you were. You brought it up to me the other day and then we talked about it on the show. What is the impact on other regional airports though? I mean, there must be this ripple effect in the whole region. Now. Everybody, it's like that, you know, when a flight is canceled, even within any airport, during normal times, one flight is canceled. Now you suddenly have how many people are on a flight, 200, 300 people, all trying to like now make other arrangements to go to the same city. So, you know, the ripple effects of this stuff can be huge. I assume that there must be chaos in other airports. Now.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's a really good point. I guess maybe LaGuardia and JFK have probably seen way increase traffic because people are trying to stay out of Newark. All I know, Andrew, is I got there and it was like a ghost town. Like a tumbleweed blew through that place. But I kept checking my flight and it kept saying on time. And I went up to the, the person I checked and I said, hey, do you know what's going on with my flight? Like, is it going to make it out? It says on time. And she goes, well, let me check. And I thought, please tell me it is going to go out today because I'm here now. I don't have, I have not. I, you know, I was talking to our friend Broadcast Barry, and he's like, well, you should just book something out of the other places. Just have it as a backup or something. And I was like, yeah, that seems like a lot of work. So I was like, fully. I was pot committed, as we say in poker, to the Newark experience. And the very helpful Alaska Airlines, you know, front desk person said, looks like it's going. She goes, my flight was at 5:30. She goes, it's only the flight starting after 6pm where we've got some real problems. And I was like, oh my gosh, I can't believe I'm missing this by a half hour. I mean, the troubles. And then she said, well, let me just see where your inbound flight is, because that's the real question. And then she looked and I was there really early too. She goes, like, I was there like Maybe three hours before my flight because our TV shoot had wrapped up. And she said, yeah, your flight's an hour and a half away. It's on its way, it's in the air, so you should be fine. And sure enough, I was fine. And sure enough, there was. Was like 50 people on the plane and I was in first class next to no one. They had seats in first class that were unoccupied, which kind of feels like, look, I don't know what everyone else's status is, but there should just be a point where they just start bringing people up to the front of the plane, like, whatever the little, you know, like, there should not be a level of status with Alaska Airlines where they're among the folks that are flying in the regular coach section, that there should never be an empty seat in first class is what I'm trying to say. Like, bring folks up. You've got. You've already set aside a lot of mixed nuts and other things for this. I mean, I guess it's maybe more work for the flight attendant, but, like, if I were in coach, even whatever, if I was enrolled or not enrolled in the little thing and there was just first class seats empty, I would feel a little bit bummed out by that.

[Luke Burbank]

But I feel like you'd have to. That could cause issues, though, because if you're just choosing, like, you get a seat, you get a seat, that would be problematic. I'll bet you if somebody was savvy and like, and forward enough to. To maybe privately talk to somebody who's staffing the plane, you know, a flight attendant, I guess that would be your only option there. You're not talking to the pilots. But if you talk to a flight attendant and just say, hey, is there any chance, like, I fly a lot. Is there any chance I can get bumped up? I bet you they would maybe make that happen just kind of quietly. But I think that they would really. You could really have some problems if you just sort of make it seem like, oh, we're going to pick 19 lucky people. Or. Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, no, definitely. If you squid gamed it.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that would be bad.

[Andrew Walsh]

Which I know first three people up here live. The rest of you have to stay in coach.

[Luke Burbank]

Can I, can I. Can I ask you about the airport, though? Because I'm a little bit. I don't know about confused, but I'm a little. I would like more details sort of about what is going on there, especially, like, kind of like on the ground. So you told me about all the issues that they were Having. And first it started with some technical issues, right. About the actual, actual. Like the equipment, the air traffic control equipment. Is that right or no. Or was it just the radar and.

[Andrew Walsh]

The radio went out for the people doing the air traffic control and now.

[Luke Burbank]

They'Re having staffing issues, air traffic control as well. And that's.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, they've had staffing issues, but the equipment outage shined a light on the staffing issue.

[Luke Burbank]

I see. And again, maybe that caused ripple effects because the technology is working again, but they're still having issues. So I expect, I expected a different scene there, which was it being like kind of chaotic with too many people who are missing flights and have been living in the airport for three days or something.

[Andrew Walsh]

Opposite.

[Luke Burbank]

But it's the opposite now because everybody has like rebooked their flights or their flights have been canceled. So what is the issue now is that. Am I right, that's the reason it's a ghost town now is because everybody plan.

[Andrew Walsh]

The issue is it's the best airport in America currently would recommend.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. So what was going to happen after 6?

[Andrew Walsh]

I guess it could get into some capacity issues like how many planes can leave at a particular time. Like there are. I can't give you the number off the top of my head, but based on the staffing, there is a. Supposedly an FAA mandated maximum number of airplanes that can take off and land in a given hour based on the air traffic staffing. And what it sounds like has happened historically is, is that that limit has regularly been violated. So just so as to allow all of the air traffic that wants to, to come in and out of a place like Newark. But because you have this, in this equipment outage and because everyone. There's like a congressional inquiry and everyone's freaking out about it, it's cleared the way for the, for the FAA and the air traffic folks to actually start basically saying, look, there's a maximum number of planes we can do. And whereas previously nobody was listening to them on that, it sounds like they are listening to them on that. So. And then the numbers change at night versus in the daytime, oddly enough. Like, I don't know how that works exactly, but. So I think right now what it means is if you have a flight in or out of Newark and it appears to be on time and you're checking the app, you're probably fine if you're. I mean, that was my experience anyway. Maybe somebody else has been through there and had a worse. A bad experience. But what I did not see is what you were talking about. Andrew. I didn't see a bunch of people, people in those kind of makeshift sleeping situations on like a bench that they've tried to make it so you can't sleep on it kind of a deal.

[Luke Burbank]

Warming their hands over a garbage fire.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exactly. I didn't see any bindles. I didn't see any oil can fires at any of the like.

[Luke Burbank]

Now were you surprised though, the way I am? Were you when you walked into the airport, were you expecting more chaos like what I was describing?

[Andrew Walsh]

No, I was expecting a ghost town. No, because of the fact that there was so few people on my flight.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that's true.

[Andrew Walsh]

That had me. That was my kind of like initial indication that like, huh, this is. And that's where I started to be like, are there going to be enough people for them to do this flight? Like, that's what I was really worried about was getting there and they were just going to announce like, we're not flying because like there's no money in this. But they didn't. They did fly. And there was. Yeah, it was a, it was a generally calm place. I mean there were people. When I say a tumbleweed, I'm obviously I'm, I'm exaggerating for hilarious effect, but it definitely was not a mob scene like the TSA check in screen. Super. Like nobody in the TSA line. Like some of that also may have to do with the time of day. I was flying out at 5:30 on a Tuesday. So, you know, that seems like that would be a normal traffic thing. It just, it was a very chill environment and again, considering that my plane took off, it was great. I hope every airport experience I have going forward is like this.

[Luke Burbank]

It was like a Staples.

[Andrew Walsh]

It was exactly like a Staples or a Taboo video.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew Walsh]

And the fact that they were allowing some of the stuff to happen at Newark that they did is, I think, regrettable.

[Luke Burbank]

Here I go once again with the email. Every week I hope that it's from a female. Oh man. It's not from a female.

[Andrew Walsh]

All right. Emails or vmails?

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. You know, I have an email that I want to share with you that I read the other day and I have been looking forward to sharing. But very quickly I'm opening up my email program here and I see that we have an email from our buddy Larry from the School of Visual Concept.

[Andrew Walsh]

To the Wash woman. I don't know if that's a term we use, but this sort of sign that was mentioned by a listener at some point that was kind of one of those neon type Signs where somebody was bending over and their bloomers were showing. And I said, exactly. I thought maybe it was on the building that for a while housed the School of Visual Concepts.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. And it was listener Judy who asked in her dazzling donor message, does anybody remember this as she described that giant automated washer woman on Aurora Avenue just before you entered the Battery Street Tunnel going southbound. It was on top of a building and she was like scrubbing clothes and you could see her bloomers. And that got us talking about the Battery Street Tunnel because I wasn't exactly sure what that was. I'd heard of it and I couldn't quite picture it. And you were telling me kind of where it is in the city. And you mentioned that it's kind of by where the School of Visual Concepts, I think was, because I think they moved recently and that that's where Larry works. And Larry is a listener, of course, and a friend of the show. And Larry says, yes, the Battery Street Tunnel is still there, sort of. After the fancy Highway 99 tunnel was finally open, the old Battery Street Tunnel was closed. Filled with rubble from the torn down viaduct. I remember that now. Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

And then I think what I'm doing in my yard.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Taking old stone.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Like, because I've got some holes, like, you know, big holes in the ground that were dug out for various things. And I'm like, what am I going to fill this with? Oh, I got this old, cracked up concrete.

[Luke Burbank]

And then this is why I wanted to share this too. But now this is. Well, it's Larry. So this is a visual concept. But I will share this with Judy later. Which takes us back to the washerwoman sign. Yes. I remember that not only would you see her undies when she leaned forward, but the thing would spew soap bubbles in the air. It was highly entertaining. This. And here's a photo based on the cars in this photo parked outside of the laundry, cleaned up. Cleaning. The sign says laundry cleaning business. The cars look like they're from the 1960s. So this is a very old photo, but I would love to share this with Judy. So, Judy, get at me or I will find your email through John and send that to you if I don't forget. So thank you for being our fact check.

[Andrew Walsh]

You did not hallucinate that, Judy. That's the good news.

[Luke Burbank]

Now, there is an email in here somewhere that I am looking for that I found delete Delightful. And it has to do with me always being worried somebody's going to mistake me for an Orioles fan because I have An Orioles cap that I like to wear. And I ever before every baseball season I think I'm really going to learn more about the Orioles. So if I'm wearing this hat in public and somebody says, go Orioles. I can like kind of drop some Orioles knowledge or have a conversation with them. But every year I forget to do that and I still don't know very much about the Orioles. Orioles. But I got this note from Jenny who says, I want to share this story about pretending to be an Orioles fan. My sister lived and worked in Baltimore for most of her 20s. She has always been very athletic and she excelled at every sport she played from childhood through college. Her friends in Baltimore were also athletic and they did recreational adult sports together, like soccer and kickball games. My sister and her friends tried out to be ball boys and ball girls for the Orioles because they thought it would be fun and funny. And my sister was the only one of them to advance. So she's actually, you know, got a real chance of being a ball boy or ball girl here. During the final interview, she was asked about the Orioles and it became very clear very fast that she had no history with or knowledge of the team. Because we are from Massachusetts, my sister is sure she was rejected not for being an or she was rejected for not being an Orioles fan. This was actually, actually a relief to, to her. She didn't want to be a ball girl anyway and scheduling would have been tough with her full time job. I believe the plan to attend the opening tryout was hatched while day drinking. That's from Jenny in Somerville, Mass. That's a great story. Yeah. Imagine getting that far and then. Yeah. Talk about the ultimate test about like, what do you know about the Orioles? Be like, well, I know, I know they're a baseball team and I know they play at Camden Yard.

[Andrew Walsh]

Is that a bird? That's maybe. I've heard that's a bird. The Oriole. Yeah. Like, I mean, I guess I can see it because I not that I think it's relevant to the job per se. In other words, yeah, you could be a, you know, you could be a ball boy or ball girl or whatever we're calling them these days. You can't say anything anymore about, you know, you could. Your job there is to field, you know, your job is to field foul balls and the like. By the way, that job would. I would have loved that as a teen and it would have stressed the bleep out of me because I would have in my mind thought I'm in the game I'm part of the team essentially. Like if there's just like a wicked line drive that's over here, it's my job to go up and bring that thing down. But it's a major league. I'm talking about infowl territory. It's like a. Or like if you're just like a one hopper that's scorched at you, but it's clearly foul, you're not interfering, right, with the real players. But it would feel to me like I was a real player out there and I would, I would, I'm sure I'd probably boot most of the balls hit to me because I would be so nervous.

[Luke Burbank]

I was thinking about this during yesterday's Mariners Yankees game and I know that, I know that the game ended with a walk off by JP that was scorched right along the third baseline and was, you know, kind of just fair.

[Andrew Walsh]

It was, yeah, more like cue balled than scorched. I mean that thing was just kind of like a wobbling bendy. Did you ever see that? It was crazy. The home plate perspective.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I only saw it live. So I didn't, I didn't realize that. But. But there was one that was scorched though, earlier in the game. I'm not confusing that one. There was one and I remember seeing. I don't know if it was a ball boy or ball girl, doesn't matter. But like whoever had that position out there, it was a fair ball. And I do believe it was for the Mariners and they were, they were fine. Like they did what they were supposed to do, which is they, they got out of the way. I mean it was a. It was really coming fast and it landed fair and then continued to hook, you know, kind of then more to the left into like foul territory. But it was a live ball and I saw, it was just like one of those quick little moments that I wouldn't have thought about except we're having this conversation right now that I remember seeing the look on the person's face and thinking like I would be so nervous to just like misread a situation. As a fan, you can really. Well, there are some very, very famous examples of fans interfering with balls and very do the bar a. Yeah. Circumstances. So like I would be so nervous not just about having to like be quick witted and athletic and be ready to grab that, but also not to be so caught up in moment of something streaking at you that you're not instinctively putting your glove up because this person is already in foul territory. But they have to remember the ball hit like half a second earlier. It hit fair and they cannot touch that son of a gun even though it's still coming at them and they're jumping out of the way.

[Andrew Walsh]

Whereas if it is 6 inches foul, it then becomes their job.

[Luke Burbank]

Exactly.

[Andrew Walsh]

You're putting a lot on a 14 year old who doesn't know shit about the Baltimore Orioles.

[Luke Burbank]

It seems so tough. I would be. I'm with you. I would be so anxious about that. But anyway, that's a really charming story. Thank you for sending that in.

[Andrew Walsh]

All right, I guess that's going to do it for today's episode. But guess what, everybody, we're going to be right back here tomorrow with another episode for you. So please, if you can join us for that. In the meantime, everybody, have a great Wednesday. Take care of yourselves and please remember, no Mountain two times all.

[Luke Burbank]

And good luck to all. Power out.