#4589 Dispatches From The Steam Room

Summary

TBTL #4589 Dispatches From The Steam Room

Podcast: Too Beautiful To Live (TBTL)
Date: November 3, 2025
Hosts: Luke Burbank, Andrew Walsh
Special Guest: Chris Hayes

Episode Overview

In this lively and conversational episode, Luke, Andrew, and guest Chris Hayes gather for TBTL’s Monday show from Chris’s Brooklyn home studio ("The Steam Room"). The episode is a blend of nostalgic urban anecdotes, reflections on the NYC marathon, light political analysis, and comically self-deprecating travel tales. Peppered with inside jokes (about the show and themselves), the crew delivers both genuine city-life warmth and the reliably goofy energy TBTL fans expect.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Podcasting from “The Steam Room” in Brooklyn

• [02:01] Luke introduces the unusual recording location, a converted steam room in Chris Hayes’s Brooklyn basement.

  • Chris jokes: “I always joke that…nothing will be more like peak 2025. I think they called it a podcast studio. Apparently back then, every home had one.” (05:32)

• The former steam room/bath is now a two-podcast household, shared with Chris's wife, legal scholar Kate Shaw.

2. Urban Reminiscing & The Joys of City Living

• [06:03-07:01] Luke describes nostalgic walks through old neighborhoods and the agony of sharing that with others.

  • Luke: “There is just nothing worse than being in a neighborhood that I used to live in with me, as I'm reminiscing about my times there. Everyone that I've dated or been married to has at some point been taken on the tour de terrible of Seattle.”

• Discussion of Halloween and block parties as peak urban experiences (see “Block Parties & Transformative City Streets”).

3. NYC Marathon Reflections

• [09:40] Luke details attending the marathon to support Becca’s family. They marvel at how the event brings the city together, noting growing crowd sizes and vibrant street atmosphere.

  • Chris: “I think it's my favorite day in New York…it's like the closest thing New York has to Mardi Gras.” (11:01)

• Tracking runners via an app and the emotional highs of cheering for loved ones.

  • Luke: "I realize Becca and I are both crying—not intensely, but tearing up a little—over yelling someone's name at a marathon." (14:12)

• The agony and comedy of losing runners in the crowd, tracking them via laggy apps, and the oddity of too many “white guys with mustaches” running.

4. Block Parties & Transformative City Streets

• [19:29] Chris references "The War on Cars" podcast conversation, highlighting how closing down a street for a block party or event dramatically changes the neighborhood energy.

  • Chris: “The difference between a block party and a not block party is just that they don’t let the cars go on the street…life blooms.”

• Discussion about increased pedestrian injuries during Halloween, and NYC’s efforts to close streets for safety and festivity.

5. A Quick Political Detour: Zoran Mamdani and NY Politics

• [22:27] Luke asks Chris for an explainer on NYC mayoral candidate Zoran Mamdani, for listeners who only know headlines.

• Chris gives context: Mamdani as a talented, pragmatic newcomer with infectious campaign energy, but with little executive experience, facing a relentless media environment.

  • Chris: “He’s profoundly talented…pragmatic in a way that I think is going to be necessary to govern the city.” (24:01)
  • Chris: “There are extractable lessons…focus on affordability, use of social media, charisma.” (25:44)

• They digress into the persistent legacies (and baggage) of Andrew Cuomo and Bill de Blasio, and local vs. national implications.

  • Chris: “[Cuomo] does carry around that baggage…I mean, the reason that he got his butt kicked in the primary is because of that.” (29:04)

• Andrew: “Why does Cuomo not carry around more baggage from having to resign in a scandal?”, raising questions about how media and voters weigh personal transgressions against political promises.

6. Travel Snafu: The Great Suitcase Swap

• [40:01-51:00] Luke tells an epic tale of grabbing the wrong bag at Newark airport—a mistake made due to all-too-similar Wirecutter-recommended luggage. He only realizes the error after several ignored calls from the airline.

  • Luke: “I found myself really mad at this guy whose luggage I had stolen. Like, I understood intellectually that I had done this, but I couldn’t not be mad at him.” (42:00)

• The suitcase’s actual owner, Josh, is absurdly forgiving and Portland-y ("He’s wearing a hoodie that just literally says ‘compassion.’”), prompting Luke to reflect on travel etiquette, life hacks (always mark your bag!), and his own neuroticism.

7. Mariners, Blue Jays, and The Agony of Sports Fandom

• [54:28-62:18] The hosts dive deep into World Series emotions. Even for teams they don't root for, high-stakes baseball leads to unexpected levels of investment.

  • Breakdown of a key World Series moment: a play at home decided by mere inches, a runner’s short lead off third, and sporting heartbreaks.

  • Comparative suffering: Is it worse for your team to lose at the last possible moment or to not make it to the big dance at all?

  • Andrew: “I did not want to watch the World Series because … I don’t want to watch anybody celebrating. … But [for the Mariners], having them make it and then even lose in a very painful way would have still been a huge thing.” (62:18)

8. The "Badlands" and TBTL Lore

• [63:03-67:36] Listeners have created on-air "imaging" (short theme music) for new TBTL concepts like "The Badlands"—the show's unofficial after-hours zone where serious digressions reign.

• The hosts reminisce about generational quirks, including MySpace autoplay music as a marker of identity.

  • Luke: “I knew that my first marriage was over when my first ex wife…changed her MySpace auto load song to some song by Spoon.” (66:42)

9. Meta Moments & Show Self-Awareness

• Throughout, the hosts reflect on TBTL’s idiosyncratic traditions, audience in-jokes, and the serendipity of segment sound bites (“Top Story!”, “Power Out!”).

  • Luke: “I think about how incredibly not thought through they were at the time of their first implementation.” (37:26)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the “Steam Room” studio

  • Chris: “I always joke that, like, when we’re selling this house in 25 years, nothing will be more like peak 2025.” (05:34)

• On marathon emotions:

  • Luke: “I realize Becca and I are both crying—not intensely, but tearing up a little—over yelling someone's name at a marathon.” (14:12)

• On cheering runners:

  • Andrew: “You've got to be careful if you're yelling at somebody you don't know. Great job, Ray!” (16:29)

• On losing a bag:

  • Luke: “I found myself really mad at this guy whose luggage I had stolen. Like, I understood intellectually that I had done this, but I couldn't not be mad at him.” (42:00)

• On podcast traditions:

  • Luke: “I think about how incredibly not thought through they were at the time of their first implementation.” (37:26)

• On block parties:

  • Chris: “The difference between a block party and a not block party is just that they don’t let the cars go on the street. Life blooms.” (19:29)

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Key Timestamps

• 02:01 – 07:01: Introduction, Brooklyn studio, nostalgia, Andrew’s “please clap” drop.
• 09:40 – 17:25: NYC marathon talk, crowds, marathon emotions, tracking apps, running anecdotes.
• 19:29 – 20:36: Block parties, urban life, closed streets.
• 22:27 – 33:42: Political segment covering Zoran Mamdani, NY mayoral dynamics, Cuomo, political crossover.
• 40:01 – 51:00: Luke’s suitcase debacle, airline customer adventures, Portland compassion.
• 54:28 – 62:18: World Series, sports heartbreak, Mariners & Blue Jays fan anguish.
• 63:03 – 67:36: Badlands segment, MySpace auto-load songs, generational nostalgia.
• 67:47 – end: Wrap up, gratitude, outro with “no mountain too tall, and good luck to all.”

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Tone & Style

• The episode is fast-moving, irreverent, and self-referential, with effusive laughter, recounted mishaps, and plenty of friendly ribbing.
• Chris Hayes matches Luke and Andrew’s zaniness with sharp observations and good-natured self-deprecation.

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In Summary

This energetic TBTL episode combines all the hallmarks of the show: urban nostalgia, pop culture musings, city-life appreciation, politics explained with a light touch, and the agony/ecstasy of being a sports fan. The hosts’ camaraderie, plus Chris Hayes’s blend of policy insight and willingness to riff on block parties and bad luggage luck, makes for a funny, insightful, and very “TBTL” hour-plus of radio.

Transcript

[A]

Okay, everyone got a celebrity name in?

[B]

All right, team one, you're up.

[A]

Okay. He was in Ocean's Eleven.

[B]

Matt Damon.

[C]

No.

[A]

He has a Tequila Silver Fox.

[B]

It's George Clooney. Yes.

[A]

Okay. She was a Pretty Woman.

[B]

Julia Roberts.

[A]

Yes. Okay. All right, I guess this is a musician.

[B]

John Mayer.

[A]

No, older. God damn. It's jazz legend Marcus the Worm Hicks. Okay, who put that in that one? Might be one of mine.

[B]

Okay, team two, we're up. Howie, you go first.

[A]

All right, this guy ran with Thaddeus Spinks. He was one of the eight balls in. Mookie Kramer in the eight ball.

[B]

I don't know. This doesn't sound like anything.

[A]

He played the alto sax with a kink in it.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Not sure. Really? Okay, pass. Okay, this one's easy. He's got the freak lips. He can hit the high C all night long. He was king of the tuk tuk sound.

[B]

Is this another jazz guy time?

[A]

Ah, come on, guys. We didn't get one.

[B]

That's because they're supposed to be celebrities. Everyone knows.

[C]

Oh, you mean like household names like.

[A]

Roy Donk or Jack Marshall? Who wrote the Munsters theme song? Roy Donk.

[B]

Oh, I think this one's Howie's. Yep. I don't know what to do.

[A]

I'm just. What was it?

[B]

Tiny Boop? Squig Shorterly?

[A]

Come on. Is that even a celebrity? He's no Roy Donk, but he was a regular guest on the Colgate Hour.

[B]

Tbtn. It's the first line of the film.

[A]

Man, it's got to be on the money here.

[B]

Hey, tbtl. Yo, yo, yo.

[A]

I just feel like I'm excited and I feel relaxed and I'm ready to party with the best of them, but.

[C]

Better use for the Internet, I haven't found it.

[A]

Well, all right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Monday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host, coming to you on this Monday morning from TBTL Studios east in the heart of Brooklyn, the podcasting offices of one Christopher Hayes. That is television's Chris Hayes, friend of the show and today temporary landlord who is letting us squat here and record the program. Normally, I introduce Andrew first, but because you're here and because we're at your place. Chris, welcome to the show.

[B]

Welcome to Brooklyn. It's great to have you here. This is very fun. We managed to get this all set up, technically. Listen, pretty impressive effort.

[A]

I want to give credit where Credit is due. We had hit a certain kind of a snag in the process of us being able to hear certain bits of audio. And Andrew and you very, I think, very wisely said, well, what if we get two AirPods that belong to the same AirPod family, but then I have one in my left ear and you have one in your right ear and might that work? And in fact, it absolutely works. We've got the system here, Jalapeno, and we've. We can't play drops, but Chris knows most of them, thankfully.

[B]

I'm just on the drop machine today.

[A]

That's right. And then right over there is of course the longest running cobra of the show. Maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. He's Andrew Walsh and he is joining us right now. Good morning, my friend.

[C]

Good morning, guys. Chris, can you give me a please clap? Give me a please clap.

[B]

Please clap.

[A]

With our awkwardly long pause in front of it too. I always debate when I'm playing that drop because I have this little system where I'm able to like kind of on the fly, edit them down and the whole process. Funny thing about Jeb is how long exclamation point was that he. There's this long, very sad waiting for the clapping. But I always wonder if that plays on the imaginary radio or not. So depending on my mood, sometimes I play the pause, sometimes I don't.

[C]

Am I right that there's also a. He takes a deep, deep breath. Right. I was going to try to play it here, but that would kill our music, I suppose. But I believe there's a big deep breath that really says it all.

[A]

He TAKES a DEEP breath. That I think is something we would all understand more fundamentally in the years to come. Oh, yeah, you know, which was like, I cannot believe.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Right. I can't believe that I'm actually going to lose this to this guy.

[C]

That was exactly.

[B]

You know, I won't be out there trash talking.

[A]

I won't be blowhard.

[B]

I won't be out there blowhard.

[A]

How much of it do we blame on the exclamation point as it's just from a branding standpoint, Jeb. Exclamation point was that. I wonder if that was also an.

[B]

Issue that that did go awry.

[C]

I don't think that he definitely had more the tone of a question mark, that's for sure.

[B]

Yeah, that's right.

[A]

Now we are here in the studios of the why is this Happening Pod. And then also, of course, strict scrutiny. This is a two podcast household. Andrew and when I asked Chris if we might be able to come over and do TBTL from here today, of course he had to also check in with Kate Shaw, one of the hosts of Strict Scrutiny, coming soon, by the way, to San Francisco and Los Angeles. Check your calendars and get out to see them. But, Chris, I hope I'm not over sharing about the details of your lovely home here in Brooklyn, but I remember when we were talking this summer, you said that this is Basically the most 2025 thing, the podcast studio and what it replaces. Or what it replaces.

[B]

Yeah. When we moved into this house, there was this. In this space, there was basically like a little kind of like hot tub, but it felt more like a schvitz from, like the 70s. It was like this tiled room, steam.

[A]

Room, kind of a Roman bath type of deal. Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Like a little Roman bath. And we were like, you know, that's what a weird thing to have. Like, why would you have that in your basement? So then we replaced it with a podcast studio. And I always joke that, like, when we're selling this house in 25 years, nothing will be more like peak 2025. And, like, I think they called it a podcast studio. They had. Apparently back then, every home had one.

[C]

Let me ask you this. What did you end up doing with your purgatorium? Is that. What is a purgatorium? Is that where people used to go to vomit in the Roman days?

[A]

That's honestly any room in the house. If you've had enough to drink. What's the old joke? Any zoo is a petting zoo. If you're brave enough, any room can be. Well, that was the thing about coming over here this morning as we were wending our way through Brooklyn. Boy, there is just nothing. There's nothing worse than being in a neighborhood that I used to live in with me, as I'm reminiscing about my times there. Everyone that I've dated or been married to has at some point been taken on the tour de terrible of Seattle. Me going like, that's a tree that I planted and cried at. This is where my dad's sign shop was. But me, Becca and I were coming in into Brooklyn this morning, and I was just like, pointing out, like, oh, that's where I, you know. Oh, by the way, you know, I lived on the street. I had. I had like a temporary, like a. Like a leased furnished apartment down at the end of this street that's totally forgotten about. But, yeah, like, I have a lot of great memories about this. This part of Brooklyn. And again, I really appreciate you letting us come over and do the show. Thank you for being on the show. It's always a big thrill.

[B]

It's a delight. It's. I don't have a show. I don't have a television show on Monday, so. So this is.

[A]

But you did have. When we walked into your kitchen, your laptop open. I hope this is okay. I did a little snooping, checked some bank records and other things. Yeah, it's weird. We have the same fingerprint. Yeah, my fingerprint works on your MacBook too, which is kind of.

[B]

You lied to us about that. And snowflakes.

[A]

Actually, you know what? Has anyone tested that? Has anyone tried to fingerprint somebody else's?

[B]

Yes, because I have tried kids devices in the past for exactly that reason. And it. And it.

[A]

Okay, so that is real.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

As I'm rolling my fingerprint, you know, as it's. If you don't have a Mac, Andrew, does your computer have one of these functions where it's fingerprint technology, but then when they're kind of intaking your fingerprint, it's talking you through it and showing you what's happening?

[C]

No, I have one that uses a fingerprint, but it doesn't tell me what to do. I just touch it gently and it awakens.

[A]

What I noticed on your computer that was visible to everyone and there was no reasonable expectation of privacy was that you seem to just be writing some important document. I don't know what it was about. I really didn't snoop, but I was like, is this just your life? Like, you don't have your TV show today, but are you just always in? And also, I'm gonna be honest, there were some books out that were complicated, and there was printouts of research materials. Is this just your life, or are you just constantly ingesting complicated things and then sort of digesting it and then what's the output version of that word?

[B]

That's how I sort of keep the voices at bay. It's like, that's my. I need to do something to keep the voices bay. No, I mean, I'm. The documents. I'm working on a book proposal for my next book, so I'm working on that. The research documents you saw were actually. It's so crazy. Those are from the first book I.

[A]

Wrote 13 years ago, Twilight of the Elites.

[B]

Twilight of the Elites.

[A]

Boy, did you nail that one, by the way.

[B]

That one? Yeah.

[A]

I mean, serious victory lap for you. I mean, it sucks, sort of, sadly. Yeah, I know. Wow. Why'd you do that?

[B]

And we are going through. We're moving, Our offices are moving because, you know, the company is getting spun off. And I've been in that office in Rockefeller center for, like, 15 years now. 14 years. So I had to. This weekend I went in with my daughter, and we, like. I packed up some stuff, which, by the way, is very intense. You know, like, you. Whatever. You're. There's something emotional always when you're packing something up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And just to think of the fact that, like, I came here before I even had kids, and I've been here for 14 years, the longest job I've ever had in my life. But randomly, there was just a bin of stuff of my research materials from that book that. I don't know how it got there or why it was there. I think my fact checker must have dropped it off or something. Anyway, so. So that was. That's sitting strewn around. But, yeah, I'm working on something else now, and. And that's how I keep. Yeah, that's how I keep.

[A]

It was impressive. It was impressive. What I did this morning was what I call Luke's New York City Marathon, which is where I go the day after the marathon, and I run around Central park, and then I get to run through the finish line.

[B]

Oh, that's cool.

[A]

Like, I did the marathon, except I actually didn't.

[C]

Was yesterday, actually, the New York Marathon. I totally missed that. It was.

[A]

Yeah. That's. In fact, that's why Becca and I were out here. And in your experience, Chris, has it become, like, more of a thing in the last 10 years than it used to be? Because when I lived out here in Brooklyn, it comes right down the street from here on Fourth Avenue. And I feel like we used to roll out of bed, walk down to 4th Avenue. People would have set up, like, stereo speakers in their windows and would just be playing, like, you know, music and stuff, and you'd cheer them on. And now it's like, we were. So we were here to watch Becca's brother and his wife both ran the New York Marathon. And it was, like, five people deep for the entire 26.2 miles. Like, as far as people on the sidelines of the thing, you couldn't get up to the, like, gate, you know, to the fence area. It just feels like it's. It's a huge thing. Has it always been that crazy?

[B]

It's a great question. I think it really depends on the spots you're in. Definitely in Manhattan, I think it's thicker, and I think Fourth Avenue tends to. Because It's. Those are wide sidewalks. It'd be pretty chill. Yeah, but it's. Yeah, it is a huge thing. I think it's my favorite day in New York York City. I mean, it's. It is an immaculate. Usually it's like a perfect time of year, weather wise.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

We got perfect weather yesterday. Everyone's out. It's sort of someone I saw, someone I know who's from New Orleans and lives in Brooklyn now, said it's like the closest thing New York has to Mardi Gras. Yeah, I think it's true. Like, there is just that, like, we.

[A]

Went by this restaurant party vibe. We were over right by the bridge, like where it comes into Manhattan. That was like a big turnaround spot. And there was a restaurant, like a diner called the Ritz. And. And they just said closing after the marathon and moving. But they were like, we're staying open. Like, we're not. We're not leaving, you know, until we've done one more of these marathons. Because, of course, just like tons of people and it was packed. It's a very emotional thing, too. Something happened. So we. We were. We were over there trying to stand by and be ready for her brother Scott, who was. It was Scott and Tiffany. And Scott was on this certain pace and he had had a hamstring injury, so it was kind of. It was touch and go. If he was going to be able to actually, like, even do it and stuff. And first of all, there are too many white guys with mustaches in this race. We should not. There should be a limit. We have exceeded it. Because you're standing there and you're waiting for this person to come and you really want to cheer, but you really want them to know that you're there cheering because otherwise why did you even go there? And it's like there's literally thousands of people that look so similar. They're all like crazy fit mustached people. And I'm like scanning, like we're looking and you've got us. There's an app that's supposed to be tracking them, but it's a little laggy. So you can't quite trust.

[C]

You can track your people.

[A]

Yes. Really?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

You can track anyone in the race. So that. For precisely this purpose.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

But it's not. It is not. It's not 100%, which is also stressful.

[C]

Is it in the number? Do they have the tracker in the number that they. Exactly. Wow.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Yeah. So when it's working, it's pretty slick. It's also why I like to, after the marathon, play a Most Dangerous game where I continue hunting the various people that I've been following online. There is something that's a little like, you can put anyone's name in. Like, Ben Gibbert from Death Cab ran it. And I was like, someone is just getting to know where Ben Gablet of Death Cab review is totally public.

[C]

He's been in that Starbucks bathroom for quite some time. Wow.

[A]

You know what else it does, by the way? You know what else it does? That's pretty crazy. This is a real thing because if you sign up, like, I want to follow so and so, and then these alerts, at some point it just says, so and so has left the park.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's like, so and so is now going. Is not going to be tracked. They're now going to be their Audi or whatever. So. So we're. We're standing there and we're, like, excited for Scott to come by, but we're also. We're like, we. We are trying to see him, and we're hoping. And I'm watching this little thing of him, and it's like, if we miss him, it's gonna be a real bummer or whatever. And then we just see him at the last second, and we're screaming for him and we're taking pictures. And it was the weirdest thing. Cause we're not even running the race. But I look over and he's. He's running and he almost doesn't hear us. And then as he's kind of far past, like, the last screaming of Scott gets through to him in this throng. Yeah. And he kind of gives us a wave, like. And I realize Becca and I are both crying, like, not. Not intensely, but tearing up a little bit over yelling someone's name at a marathon. I understand if you're finishing the marathon, like, being emotional. Why was I emotional? Yelling someone's name at a marathon?

[B]

There's something. There is a kind of distinctly raw, vulnerable celebr thing about the whole energy of it. You know, people like. You know how hard it is. You know how hard people have worked for it. Everyone's being so supportive in such a sweet way.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like when I, Kate, ran the Philly marathon last year, and I took the two youngest kids, David and Anya, we went and we did that thing where, like, you're tracking her. It's also super stressful. If you miss it, you're screwed.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And we were driving around Philly and trying to, like, park, and then everyone's on the Sort of same.

[A]

Yes. Hopping around the shadow marathon, I'm calling it, where all the people who are not running the marathon are running around with the giant signs they've made, freaking out that they're not gonna get to the spot at the same time as.

[B]

The person fighting for parking. Then finally, just like, parking in front of a driveway and running out of the car.

[A]

Hospital for disabled nuns.

[B]

Exactly. Anya had this sign that she and her. And her babysitter had made that was, like, a star, and it was like, touch here to power up.

[A]

Oh, nice.

[B]

And she was just, like, holding it, and it was just like the purest, sweetest, sort of emotional thing of People were coming by. And this was, like, in mile, like, 16 or 17, we found three different sp. And people were. They were in. There's some name for that. They call it, like, the. Not the shallows or the. Something. There's, like, a part of the marathon.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

There's, like, a name for. That's like, you know, the Valley of Bad Feelings.

[A]

Yes. Yes.

[B]

And they were in that. And they were just, like, brightening up, and it was just the. I found it really emotional even before Kate got there.

[A]

We ended up at the 24th mile, so in the park a little bit, and then somehow we managed through some maneuvering to actually be right on the. On the fence so, like, you could lean out and high five the runners. And again, the 24th mile of this is also just, like. You've got people that are just, you know, barely even able to walk. They're obviously in a lot of pain. Maybe they've gotten an injury. Some people are, like, totally great and fine. But also, this is the thing now that they do in marathons. A lot of people will wear a jersey or a bib that has their name on it, like, kind of enlarged letters. So, you know, the names of, like, a lot of these people who you have never met and will never meet, and just, like, yelling like, good job, Ray.

[B]

Ray, you're so close.

[A]

You're so close right now. Like.

[C]

You got to be careful if you're yelling at somebody you don't know. Great job.

[B]

Great job. Great job, Ray.

[A]

No, we did really get waved off. Becca and I got, like. We got a. From, like, a guy who was. He was struggling, and. And we were trying to be positive and said, like, you're so close. You're doing great. You're looking strong. And he just looks at us. He just does the most dismissive, like, ugh, out of here with that. And I was like, I actually get that I actually totally get that. I'm trying to be helpful. It's probably not helping.

[B]

You've run marathons.

[A]

I've run a marathon.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And the funny thing about that is I ended up walking, like I just hit the wall. I ended up walking in the maybe 25th mile for like maybe two city blocks.

[B]

Right.

[A]

And during that time, this was in the very early days of tbtl. We had somehow even fewer listeners then than we do now. And in that one to two blocks that I was walking, somebody came up to me, oh, are you Luke from tbtl? And I was like, you gotta be kidding me.

[B]

That is a nightmare.

[A]

That is the worst case scenario for me in this is like being caught in my moment. What city was was down south of Seattle, it was called the Green River Marathon. Known for the killer, by the way.

[C]

They call it the Green River Marath. Interesting.

[A]

Brand new, because the Green river is a real place. And the reason that I picked it was because I went on the Internet and I said, what is the flattest marathon I can do in the state of Washington? And you couldn't get any river marathon.

[C]

You couldn't get into the Dahmer dash.

[A]

The Gacy 5K.

[B]

The beat is completely the BT5.

[A]

Yeah, right. Yeah. But so I have done. I have done a total of one marathon. And I think that was probably enough for me. But yeah, I mean, it was a really. You're right, it was. It's a beautiful day and it's just so fun to see everybody out. And I also just feel like not to make everything political, but in this day and age where big cities are so maligned and are always being described as these like non functional hell holes, it's just so fun to be in a city like New York when it's having its best day.

[B]

Yeah. And it's also like we had Halloween in the neighborhood just, you know, on Friday night. And that's another.

[A]

By the way, nice costume.

[B]

Incredible. Oh, thank you. Yeah, I was pretty proud of that one. I got like a few acknowledgments. I was. I was Bob Ferguson, Leo DiCaprio from One Battle after another. I had the. I had the like, sort of housecoat robe. I had the big like wraparound, wraparound shades that he grabs in the store. And I got a goatee.

[C]

Nice.

[B]

I had a few people, like, a few people came up to me were like, what time is it? Which I thought was pretty good.

[A]

That's great. That's really clever.

[B]

But we had Halloween here and I just had the same feeling and I think, Andrew, you're. You're a big, you know, you're a big partisan of, like, urban life, city.

[A]

Streets, like the E line.

[C]

Yeah, culturally, Eli.

[B]

Sure, culturally, Eli. And it's just. There's just nothing like it. Like everyone out sort of together, meeting their neighbors, talking to each other, talking to strangers, talking to friends. Really, really special. I kind of wish we had one of those, like a month, you know.

[A]

You said something on withpod recently when you were talking to the war on cars folks, Chris, that I thought was. It blew my mind. But like you were saying, the difference between a block party and a not block party is just that they don't let the cars go on the street. Like, if you. And this. This area of Brooklyn is so great for that, you know, in the summertime, when it'll happen, you just like, no cars on the street for the next few hours, and it's just like life.

[B]

Blooms, you know, they did it. They did it for Halloween, too, on a bunch of streets. There's. I don't know if you guys have seen this chart. There's this chart that goes around every year, and it's children, pedestrian, car injuries, days of the year, okay? And every day is the same, except one day, which is Halloween, which is like 6x the next closest day, right? Because there's all these kids out there walking around, and so they're. They're at car accidents. So they close a bunch of streets here now where they just put, like, New York City, you know, police horses, basically those, like, wooden things. And again, totally transformative, like, just everyone. And that's another thing about. That's another thing that makes the marathon magical is that huge swaths of city streets are closed. And that feels, like, completely transformative.

[A]

We also got very nearly trapped in the marathon.

[B]

Oh, yeah, that's scary.

[A]

Which it was scary because we were going to see. Death becomes her. We had these very expensive tickets to go see this show. And we were trying to go to the finish line, which we kind of got to the finish line, but then we realized, oh, the show's starting, you know, in like, 45 minutes, and we need to get out of here. And all of a sudden we're like, you cannot get out of Central park because it's surrounded by. Unless you go all the way up into the 80s, which was very far from where we were. And we couldn't call a car because nobody could get there. And we were like. I was like, there's one possible chance, because we're in Central park south, and I Was like, if we can go to where that N train is and then get out on the plaza.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I was like, okay, we're rolling the dice. Because if we go all the way down there because we were at Columbus Circle, right? Sorry. This is getting so New Yorky. We were at Columbus Circle and it was like, we're, this is all we have. We're betting on trying to go all the way down. That's fifth, right? Maybe, or Central park south or whatever it's called. And we're going to. If maybe they haven't closed this subway, right? You kind of go underneath the road. But if we go down there and it's blocked off, that's it, game over. Like, we've committed to this thing. And it was like the most stress I felt in years.

[B]

The subway is like an E Line, but they put it underground.

[C]

Why is it underground? Can it go wherever it wants? Can it take turns? Or, like, can it take a right wherever it wants to? What's the deal?

[B]

I gotta go. I, I, I still have never been on the E Line or, or any Seattle.

[A]

You haven't been on the E Line. Still haven't been on the. But you know what, Chris? You haven't ridden the E Line, but you have culturally experienced it by doing karaoke at the Mandarin Gate.

[B]

It's true.

[A]

Imagine you put the Mandarin gate inside of an aluminum tube with wheels and ran it around the city. That's what the E Line is.

[B]

Pyramid of Giza. Taj Mahal, E Line.

[A]

Yes, absolutely. Okay, Chris, again, I don't want to make you do sort of your day job here. And also, we're not a show that really delves too much into politics. But I did want to ask you, this is a serious thing, a little bit about Zoran Mamdani, because it's a huge story. I'm kind of weirdly psyched that I'm going to be in. I mean, I can't vote here. I have no connection to it. I'm also weirdly psyched I'm going to be here tomorrow on the day.

[B]

Interesting.

[A]

It's a huge story. And the is thing, it kind of came up on the show last week a little bit. And what I realized in trying to talk about with Andrew is I just don't know enough about the story other than, like, I've seen him on your show. I, you know, I've read the normal amount of what people read in the New York Times, but I guess the question is, is, like, for people that are just not in the greater New York area. But keep seeing this name coming up in the news and stuff. Like, how should people think about this? What is, like, really the story here? Is there any evidence that, like, he can really do the stuff in New York City that he is proposing that he wants to do?

[B]

Some of it, Yeah. I mean, I listened to your guys. Bill de Blasio conversation. It's pretty great. And I actually, I started out. Andrew persuaded me. I started out being like, I don't. You know, I don't. I think he's. He's. He's technically being honest. Bill de Blasio of Long Island.

[C]

Oh, right. Oh, I was wondering.

[B]

What. I came around.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[B]

I came around. I came around on your position. But no, yeah. I mean, look, I think he's profoundly talented, like, politically talented. I have found him very. What's the right word? I think, sort of open minded and curious and pragmatic in a way that I think is gonna be necessary to govern the city.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You know, he's young and has never really run anything before, and it's arguably the hardest job in the country other than president. I mean, it's just. It's a brutally difficult job. So, you know, but also, he has run an incredibly deft race. I think he's done a really good job of reaching out to all kinds of different constituencies. The energy around him is really palpable.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I haven't seen people this excited about a candidate for a while. Yeah, it reminds me a little bit. The only thing it really reminds me of is when we lived in Chicago, and I'm not saying they're comparable political figures, but when we live in Chicago in 2003 and 2000, 2004, when there's a state senator running for Senate named Barack Obama, who. There was a similar kind of like, everyone we knew was just all in and they were signing up for volunteer canvassing shifts, and we had a birthday party at my house that was like a kegger where we, like, charged people $10 and contributed to the campaign. Like, that kind of thing doesn't happen that often around candidates.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And it is definitely happening around him in a real, like, a very cool and inspiring way.

[A]

I guess my question is, does this mean anything to the rest of the country? In terms of the politics of the rest of the country? It's the mayor of New York. Does this just indicate where New York might be at? Or is this some sort of. Please tell me that this is a bellwether and it's really good news for people that live In Southern Washington.

[B]

I mean, I do think there are. Yes, yes.

[A]

I think asking for a friend. Kalama County.

[C]

What are they literally Kalama County?

[A]

Do you have any research on that? Amendments in Kalama?

[B]

I mean, I keep saying to people like, you're not going to run Zoram Hamdani for like the state set for like the Senate seat in Iowa, you know, like. And I think everyone, I mean, everyone understands that.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I think there are extractable lessons. I mean, I think the, you know, the focus on affordability that he did from the beginning, which I think is very like, obviously the number one issue in polls. And he's also been obsessively focused on, I think his use of social media. I think his like, charisma. There's a bunch of things that I think are transferable. Yeah. Ultimately the politics of New York are weird and really distinct and I'm not sure how transferable it is. You know, there's these two other races where there's like two gubernatorial candidates, Mikey Sherrill and Abigail Spamberger, who are running for governor in New Jersey and Virginia respectively. And they are like classic normie Democrats, you know, like national security resumes elected office. They've run races that, you know, we'll see what their outcomes are.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I do think there is this thing that happens which is there are three races every year of the year after the big presidential. New Jersey, Virginia and New York mayor.

[A]

Uh huh.

[B]

And because of that they get like a huge amount of attention. Everyone's like trying to read the tea leaves from them.

[A]

I was saying not to get. This is a boring political niche and also poorly researched by me. So kind of the sweet spot, perfect for my discourse. But I was saying to Becca, I was like, well, you know, it'll be interesting if Mamdani is elected. Then it's. I mean, obviously if someone stubs their toe in New York, it will then be Mamdani's lawless New York is, you know, falling apart, etc. And then she goes, well, do you think they would do that with Cuomo? And I was like, I give. They'd give him two months probably, right?

[B]

Yeah. I mean, the New York media is pretty relentless anyway. But like the New York Post, the Murdoch properties, I mean, one of the details of that Bill de Blasio story that to me was so interesting was that story was done by the Times of London. Yeah.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Because the entire Murdoch empire has like, is like waging war against. And the reason someone pointed this out, the New York Post reporter would have de Blasio's actual information and would never make that mistake. It's because.

[A]

Right.

[B]

They're like flooding the zone from across the sea.

[A]

The Adelaide Times.

[C]

That is a really, really good point. We didn't even mention that in all of our conversation.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

About that story. It was like, oh, yeah, the Times of London was covering.

[B]

Yeah. Like, yeah, the Times of London has a big scoop where they get the ex mayor to like, yeah, you know, talk trash about the guy who's endorsed. And it's like, oh, right, it's because.

[A]

Just emptying out the clip.

[B]

Emptying out the clip.

[A]

Everything we got, let's, let's throw it out.

[B]

And they're going to have, you know, they're going to continue to do that if he wins, for sure.

[A]

Well, right.

[B]

It'll be like a real, There'll be a lot of sort of, you know, they even got a story today where they like, how many, you know, there's going to be a mass exodus. And they did a poll. This is my favorite use of polling is like asking someone a hypothetical question and then reporting the polling results. Like a real, like half a million New Yorkers say they'll leave if he wins. Well, people say a lot of things.

[C]

Right, Right. Yeah. What was that? That was 9% or something today. So I have a really immature question about this, if you don't mind. Yeah, this is such a dumb question in 2025, but it is the thing that sort of dogs me when I, when I think about this from afar is like, why is Cuomo, why does Cuomo not carry around more baggage from having to resign in a scandal? And like, it's like, Mamdani, oh, he might not be able to achieve everything he says he's going to achieve. Like, that seems to be the ding on him. And another guy like sexually harassed a dozen women. And we're like, I don't know, like it's a really tough choice.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, I do think he does carry around that baggage. I mean, the reason that he got his butt kicked in the primary is because of that. The reason, like he should, you know, if he hadn't resigned in disgrace as the ex governor and this very known quantity and you know, he should be in a much better position than he is politically. The reason he's losing to a 32 year old state assemblyman who very few New Yorkers had heard of before this campaign. I mean, truly, truly. I had a vague knowledge as someone who is.

[A]

Well, as a, as a rap fan.

[B]

Yeah, exactly.

[A]

Yes, you're familiar with his hip hop career. Right.

[B]

I just saw a video he did where someone was like, asked him, like, is there something on the Internet of you you'd like to take off? He's like, well, I'm in a music video topless in a halal cart and an apron. I'd like that to come down.

[A]

Good answer.

[B]

Pretty good. He's a very charming guy. So, yeah, I think, like, he definitely has. It's not. He has. He has and is paying the penalty for sure. You know, I think absent all of that, he'd be in such a different position. And also, that's the other thing about Mandani's success, which you can't. It's inextricably linked to just the total bankruptcy of the Adams Cuomo pairing.

[A]

Like, Right.

[B]

If, you know, I've said this to people that have, you know, different politics than. Than Mamdani and, you know, New Yorkers from the finance world who are, you know, whose politics on a bunch of stuff. Very different. It's like, you guys should have gotten your act together to find someone to run with your politics in your lane that weren't these guys, because you have some really, really, really flawed candidates that you're trying to, you know, trying to win this with.

[A]

And we haven't even started to discuss Curtis Sliwa. By the way, you know, who was the, you know, who produced the Curtis Sliwa show many, many years ago? Jen Flash Andrews.

[B]

Oh, that's perfect. That is perfect.

[A]

Jen Flash. I think a. Like a. Like a recent Fordham grad. She was. And she. And she was a. She was a conservative talk radio producer in New York for a. And produced Curtis Sliwa's radio show back in the day.

[B]

Someone. He appeared again. This is pretty niche, and it's a visual joke, which is best for this medium. But they had the debate with the three candidates a few weeks ago, and Sliwa didn't have the beret on.

[A]

Oh, man.

[B]

And it was so unnerving. Someone said, it's like seeing a snail without a shell. And the debate was on right up against our show, like, overlapping. And I got into the green room, I got in the makeup room to go do hair and makeup, and I looked up and it was on. I was like, wait, wait, I know that guy. Who is that? I know him.

[A]

I was like, oh, my God, that's.

[B]

Sliwa without the beret.

[A]

Wow. Yeah, that's a. That's definitely. He's really effectively branded himself the red satin and the beret, you know, that Sliwa is here.

[B]

Do you, Andrew, do you feel like obviously it's not like local media. Like, do you feel like you're getting in Seattle a lot of zoron stuff?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Just like who you fall on blue sky.

[C]

Well, that's the thing. I'm on blue sky, which means I'm getting all of this from a very blue sky perspective. Yeah, it's very. And also like. And not just damning the conservative media, but the media in general. Like I was going to ask you that too. Do you think there. Because again, I'm getting all of this from a very biased perspective, which is like very far left progressives on blue sky complaining about literally everything. They're my people.

[B]

But same and same.

[C]

There's a lot of criticism of the New York Times as well. We don't have to like dig it all up. But you know, there's like a couple of really big examples of them, like maybe running stories that they wouldn't have or, you know, relying on anonymous sources that break all their anonymous sources rules to sort of write this piece that like damns him in some very small way or. And I don't know if it was the Times doing this, but like the. He referred to his, what, mom's cousin as his uncle or something. And like people are jumping on these things that seem like so critical in such unimportant ways to me.

[B]

Yeah, there's been a few. I think there's some fairness to that critique and some is a little overstated. I think the, you know, there he referred to. He gave a speech about Islamophobia where he talked about an auntie who didn't want to wear hijab. And then it turned out like it wasn't technically an aunt, it was a cousin of his father. But like, I mean, everyone.

[C]

My Uncle Steve, actually, who also didn't wear a hijab.

[A]

Yeah, for totally different reasons.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Well, you know what, guys?

[B]

I had a cab driver in Ireland who said, he said to me, yeah, he's like talking about the immigrants. Like, there's a lot of them, they're Muslim. He's like, I don't believe in that. I was like, I don't really peg you for. I don't really think of you as that sort of five pillars guy, but yeah.

[A]

Wow. Well, I was going to say this has been. Thank you, Chris, for indulging me. This has actually been fun and enlightening. But we should, after we thank these donors, we should get back to what TBTL does best. Me telling a Story of pulling the most dumbass move on Saturday night that involved me traveling to Linden, New Jersey.

[B]

Travel related.

[A]

It had me. It is travel related to Lyndon. I wish I could have got the.

[C]

Bulkhead, which is the first class of coach.

[A]

Yeah, it's the first class of coach direct flight to Linden, New Jersey from midtown Manhattan. They just added it. And yeah. I want to tell you guys what I did this weekend that was just a true low point after we thanked these donors. Thank you, baby. All right, let's thank some donors who are making TBTL possible. Some donors also let us do the show from their home studio, which is really the. That's the highest order of TBTL support.

[C]

That's right.

[A]

But we also appreciate folks like Matt Wilson in Richmond, Virginia. By the way, this is 100% listener supported podcasting. We do this five days a week only because we are doing it as our job. And it's thanks to folks like Matt Wilson. Also folks like Matt White in Tacoma, Washington. We've got. If we had one more Matt, we would have a what?

[C]

A parliament of mats.

[A]

You mean a parliament of mats. Yeah, that's something I'm trying to think of what. Anything I can come up with is going to potentially be hurtful to mats. So I should probably. I don't want to generalize around people named Matt. I just want to thank them when they're donating to the show. Thank you, Matt. And Matt, also thanks to Leo Schultz, who's in Madison, Wisconsin.

[C]

Nice. Now, if you're ever in Madison, Wisconsin, you're going to be using Leo Studios, is correct. Is that the agreement?

[A]

Yep, that's. That's. People have not looked at the very fine print of their donations to tbtl. At the way bottom, it says if we're near where you live and you have a podcasting studio, we are allowed to. We're actually allowed you to.

[B]

I agree, I agree. I agree. Terms of service. I agree.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

Okay, fine, Whatever.

[A]

And we're allowed to bump you from your own recording. That's the part that the lawyers were questioning when we put it in there. But Leo signed it. That's the deal. Also something that was signed by Kristen Arnson, who's in Thunder Bay, Ontario.

[C]

Our pal, Kristen.

[A]

Yeah, we saw Kristen after the Philly party. Thank you, Kristen. Thanks also to Heather lynch, who's in. Now I get this one mixed up. This is the Pennsylvania version. Is it Newtown, Pennsylvania? Because I feel like there's the Newton, Massachusetts, right?

[B]

Yeah, Newton, Mass. But that's new. I think it's Newtown, Pennsylvania.

[A]

Newtown, Pennsylvania is where Heather is. Thank you, Heather DeKalb. That's right. Oh, God. Boy, that was. That was 45 minutes.

[B]

I loved it.

[A]

I mean, that was. I have to say that was bad program, but it kind of works for you as a guy who grew up in New York. Probably listen to some soul coughing and lives in Brooklyn.

[B]

Like, that was very micro targeted.

[A]

I don't know how Debbie James Burgum felt about it out there in Mukwonago, Wisconsin.

[B]

That's a tough one.

[A]

That's a name I haven't heard in a long time, slash, ever.

[C]

Yet it was New Town that tripped us up somehow. You nailed this one.

[A]

Yes. Mukwonago just trips right off the tongue. I wonder how close when we were in Friendship, Wisconsin. I wonder how close we were to Mukwonago, Wisconsin, where Debbie is. Debbie, thank you and thank you to all of our donors. We really could not do this thing and wouldn't let be honest with you. We wouldn't do this thing without you. So thanks for making this happen all these years later.

[C]

Hello and welcome to Top Story.

[A]

I'm having kind of a weird sensation of doing the show, Chris, with you and with Andrew, but with you as somebody who also listens to the show. And I see your head kind of bop along to these, these like sonic kind of little guideposts in the show. And I think about how incredibly not thought through they were at the time of their first implementation. Like that Top Story thing was literally, because I thought, well, we should have something that says we're going to try to talk about the news or whatever. And I went on the Internet to try to find has anyone said the words top Story? And it was. And by the way, I think we know someone who knows that guy. Somebody was a co worker of that person. Yeah, the Channel 4, it's the B. I think it's something with the BBC. But it's funny because it's like I remember where I was when I just grabbed that little piece of audio. It was like at my house in Seattle that had like Burbank Studios. De Bajo. See, I was debajoing long before.

[B]

Oh, we're debajo, right?

[A]

Have you heard a name for this? Yeah, we are. And debasing the program. Do you like, do you have a name yet for the room? Do we call this like, you know, Hayshaw Studios or.

[C]

I like TBT Studios.

[A]

How about the Steam Room?

[B]

Steam Room. And east tbt? The Steam Room.

[A]

The Steam Room. Sounds kind of. Sounds kind of good. Things getting hot.

[B]

I think it sounds the opposite.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. So Saturday night, Becca and I first flew. We flew from Portland to Newark, New Jersey, because it happens to be where Alaska Airlines agreed to take us. Sometimes they agree to take us to jfk, sometimes they take us to Newark. And so that's where we were. Never LaGuardia, though. I don't really think they fly into LaGuardia. But I. By the way, LaGuardia is nice now. It's that whole new world. That fountain, that, like, sonic fountain. Pretty. Pretty exciting. But it was kind of a long flight. And then we got in at about like 7 and then got our stuff, got our bags, got in the car. And, you know, it's a Saturday night. You're trying to go from New Jersey into Manhattan. So it's just like. Just like the Lincoln Tunnel. And everything's just like a mess. Just traffic and it's an. You know, I probably should. I should just figure out how to take public transit. I should take the E line, honestly, from. It's a lot fat. It would probably be a lot faster. But, you know, I had Becca and the whole thing. So I was like, we'll take a car. I start. We're pulling. We're finally in midtown, and we're finally worked our way up to where our hotel is in Midtown. We're like a block from the hotel. I start getting these calls on my phone that are like a 206 call. And I'm like, oh, this has got to be spam. Because, you know, one of the things that they figured out is how to, like, spoof.

[B]

Now, my is 206seattle.

[A]

206 is seattle. Now here's the thing.

[B]

Anytime I see an. I have a Chicago phone number. So anytime I see a 773, I also automatically assume it's spam because it's.

[A]

But now here's the funny part. My phone is from la. My phone is not a Seattle number. So that's why my theory should have been out the window immediately. I just thought. I don't know. I never. No one ever calls me. Unidentified number from the 206. But they just keep calling. And I'm just like nexting it. And they keep calling. And I'm actually.

[C]

You know what? This is already so anxious.

[A]

Yeah, I have. Let's see if this works. I didn't even think to do this. But let's see. I actually have. Finally, it starts leaving me a voicemail. The person. Luke, this is Faye from Alaska Airlines.

[B]

I'm calling because we have your bag here.

[A]

At the airport, there is another guest who has a bag similar to yours that is also missing. So we do think that there may have been a swap between you guys.

[B]

Please give us a call back at this number.

[A]

Thank you. Oh, I took the wrong bag. Another dude's suitcase.

[C]

Is this the. I'm gonna dox your suitcase here. Now this. You're not still using the away bags that you and I both got that look? Cause I'm still using one of those. And everybody from wow had that same exact bag.

[B]

Yeah, Well, I think It's a Chateau St. Michel bag.

[A]

It is.

[C]

It is.

[A]

It's the perfect Turkey wine. Chateau St. Michel. This is what happens. No, it's not an away bag, but this is what happens when you go to the, like, New York Times wire cutter for everything, right? Like, hey, what's the best, you know, in this price range? Rolling suitcase for whatever. And then you go out and buy it. And then there's like a bunch of, as we used to say, plus people like us who read the same article and have. So the. The kind of luggage that I have has a specific. It has this little thing on the wheels. It's got this little yellow kind of stamp. And that's. I realized that's what my brain now looks for.

[B]

Oh, but that's part of the. The actual luggage.

[A]

Yes, it's part of the luggage. There's a little thing on the wheel of this particular kind of luggage, because my luggage is. It's black. It's pretty typical looking, except the wheel is different. And all I do is look for. All I do is look at the wheel now. And this came off. And it was someone else's luggage. Same manufacturer, though. And, like, this is what was truly crazy about it. I found myself really mad at this guy whose luggage I had stolen. Like, I understood intellectually that I had done this, but I couldn't not be mad at him.

[B]

That is so funny, because I have. This has happened to me once on his side. I got to LAX once, and someone took my bag. And I was so mad at that.

[A]

Person and as well you should have been as well. This fellow. I'll just name him Josh. That is his name, but I won't give his last name. The person, Alaska Airlines goes, well, I have him here. Do you want to talk to him? And I said no, because, I don't know, I needed to compose myself or something. I was weird.

[B]

Why did you make me take your bag?

[A]

Totally. I was really. Like, some part of me thought somehow this was still someone else's Fault. And so she was like, well, do you want me just to hand the phone to him? And I said, no, my phone is dying. Which was not actually a lie. And I was like, we're at the hotel. I need to just, like, drop my stuff off and maybe drop off my girlfriend and then figure this out. But she didn't really want to be the mediator anymore. Again, also fair to her. What we have.

[B]

He has your bag.

[A]

He has my bag. Or there. What they. What they figured out was someone took his bag. I have the same bag, and mine is there. This must be. They just. You know, they just. They just kind of made that logical leap, and they were totally right. But I was like, I need to. I don't know. It was like, I didn't want to talk to her anymore. I didn't want to talk to him for some reason. Again, I did this. But then she was like, okay, well, can I give him this number? I was like, yeah, please just have him call me in a little bit. Like, I don't know. I'm gonna. I need to figure this out. So we get to the hotel. We kind of drop our stuff. I checked the bag. Yes, this is this guy's bag. And then the phone rings, and it's a, you know, Portland number. And I enter, and he's like, hey, it's Josh. I'm so sorry, but I think you have my bag. He was so unbelievably nice.

[C]

He's apologizing to you.

[A]

He was interrupt.

[B]

You stole my bag.

[A]

Yes, it was so. He was like. He was like, oh, man, I'm so sorry. I go, dude, I did this to us. I am so sorry. I go, well, where are you coming into, you know what part of the city? And he goes, oh, no, no, no. I'm staying in New Jersey, and we're going to Philly. I'm going to Philadelphia. Now, this is where I became mad at Alaska Airlines because they just announced four new routes from Portland starting in a month, and one of them is a direct from Portland to Philadelphia. And if Alaska Airlines would have had that route active, I could not have stolen Josh's bag because he would not have had to fly to Newark.

[C]

That's what I was thinking. This is a really interesting.

[A]

A lot of this is on Alaska Airlines.

[B]

Yeah, this is your first thought.

[A]

I'm explaining to you how insane my mind is.

[B]

You know, who else is to blame other than Josh?

[A]

No. No one comes to mind.

[C]

Alaska Airlines, for sure.

[A]

There's a long list of people who are not me who did this? Yes, 100%. So. So then. So then I'm like. I mean, I just understand that there's. I have to bite the bullet and just. And I also feel bad because this guy's night is now being also ruined. I'm an hour from.

[B]

You're hoping on the other end of that call, he's going to be like, oh, I'm staying at this hotel, like.

[A]

Four blocks from here in midtown.

[B]

Let's go meet.

[A]

No, he is going to. He's on his way to Philadelphia. He's like, I was going to get ramen with some friends. And I was like. And he goes, but I'll just stay here at the. At the airport. And I was like. He goes, I think it's kind of the other direction. I go, dude, don't, like, ruin your night. I'll just get back in the Uber and I'll just send me the address and I'll come to you. And he goes, oh, okay, Cool, man. Thanks. So he sends me the address, and I, like, look at it, and I punch it into Uber, and it's a $400 Uber. Oh, my God. Because it's almost in Philadelphia.

[B]

Sounds about right.

[A]

It's like. And then I'm like. I'm, like, calling him. I'm like, josh, Josh, Josh, abort. Abort. Back to plan A. And I hear he's in a car already. And he's with. Here's the thing. He is so nice. But I can tell his friend who's operated the vehicle less charmed.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

By the whole situation, understandably. So. So it's kind of good cop, bad cop. Josh is just like. I was like, josh, it's gonna. And this is how I. This wasn't a lie, because it was true. I didn't lead with, it's a $400 Uber ride. I said, I'm looking at it. And I realize it's going to take a lot longer to get the luggage to you, because it's like, you're going to be an hour past, you know, like, I'm going to be chasing you. If you wait there, I can get you your luggage sooner. And so. And I could hear his friend, who was, like, already excited to go to this ramen place in wherever the hell, New Jersey kind of goes, yeah, I don't know. We'll pull over. We'll pull. We're just going to. I don't know, I don't know, click. And I'm like, I've been that guy.

[C]

God, I've been that guy.

[A]

And So I then get. I get a. Finally, I get a message from Josh that they have gone to a different, like, a dumpling place in Linden, New Jersey, which is closer to Newark. So they're, you know, again, thoughtful. They've, like, changed their dinner plans. And so, yeah, we. And also, this is where I am, like, this is where I'm not a good life partner with someone, because we're at the hotel, and I said to Becca, I was like, like, just hang out here. I'll go deal with this. I did this. And she was like, no, I'll come with you. I was like, greater love. Greater love hath the no girlfriend than to get back in the cab going to New Jersey with me. And then she did say something remarkable last night. We were telling the story to some folks at dinner, and she goes, what if I would have been the one that grabbed the wrong luggage? She goes, what would your reaction have been? I would have been. I said, not great. I was the only person that could have done this in this dynamic, because I'm so. I'm so. I was so mad. And the only thing that in any way tamped down my madness was I was the only person who I could be mad at.

[B]

Saturday evening.

[A]

Saturday night.

[B]

Oh, God, the traffic.

[A]

Oh, dude, I can't even. Brutal. Absolutely brutal.

[B]

That's real nightmare fuel. Because, yeah, there are these distances. I mean, every city has distances like this, but there are distances in the New York metro area. Often I encounter them on the way to or back from a sporting events where, like, you know, when you punch in an address and it's like seven miles an hour and ten minutes, that's that, like. And that is one of those. South Jersey.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

By Newark is one of those where you're like, it's. It's not that far.

[A]

No, as the crow flies. That's why I wish they had a direct flight to Linden.

[B]

So long.

[A]

To the ugly dumpling house.

[B]

So did you go to the dumpling house?

[A]

We went to. Not the ramen place.

[C]

Right.

[A]

They were really on one with about having Asian food. Apparently, they switched from the wrong place to this dump. By the way, this dumpling place looked awesome. I was also, by the way, I'm so hungry at this point, he's eating his dumplings.

[C]

I was gonna say just walk over, pick it off his plate. You've already established the dynamic. He'd apologize. He'd be like, oh, I'm sorry I don't have more dumplings for you.

[A]

That would have been classic Josh, because I get there. Josh Comes out. Josh is the most Portland person I've ever met. I'm standing in the lobby of the Dumpling Place in Linden, New Jersey with Josh's luggage and I call him, like, hey, man, I'm here. He's like, oh, cool, great. He comes out, we hug. Love that Josh is wearing this. Sounds like I'm making this up. Josh is wearing, you know, one of those. Remember those hoodies? I'm sure you had one, Chris. I did that you could customize. They were really popular. They were like. Were they called Brooklyn hoodies? I don't know. Like you could put whatever neighborhood you wanted, you know, on the thing. This is not a joke. His, he was wearing one of those hoodies and it said on the hoodie, compassion. That is a real thing that he was wearing.

[C]

That's the best case scenario for you.

[A]

I stole the right guy's luggage. As we're walking out to the car to swap, he's like, ah, I keep thinking I gotta put something on this luggage so that it's because it's so. It just looks like every other thing. And I'm like, dude, you did not do anything wrong here. This was 100% me. And I am so, so sorry that I messed up your night.

[B]

But I will say this, this is a life hack that I learned from my mother in law, Mary Shaw, the great Mary Shaw. She is insistent and obsessive about either a ribbon or a golden star or like a piece of painter's tape or something. And always has been that way. And it genuinely. Particularly if you have a black. Yes, it really does help.

[C]

That's why I put the Punisher logo on mine.

[A]

The remains of a flag, except it's very tattered, but also very black. Now for some reason, you know, I have Maga Sasquatch. There you go. I, I, that was a great power out. But I'm going to step all over it and say that, yeah, I, I will never make this mistake again personally. But you're right, I should put something on my luggage so that somebody else doesn't accidentally do this. Although karmically, I'm definitely very much in deserving that to happen at some point. But it was also just crazy because, you know, I travel all the time. I never do this. They're always playing those stupid announcements. A lot of bags, bags look similar. Please. I'm always just like, miss me with all of this boilerplate that I do not need particularly. It's funny because in the, I've said this before, but in like the seatac Airport. They decided because it's like, you know, there's a big music scene in Seattle, and they, you know, they're always trying to find ways to make this boring stuff more interesting. So they, like, in the Seatac airport, they said, well, what if we had Seattle rock musicians record the voiceover stuff of, like, where you're going? And it's like, yeah, but guess what? You. You run through, like, you run through Eddie Vedder pretty quickly, and you get down to like, hey, it's Kale from Pinback. What? Hey, hey, hey. It's Devin. It's Devin from Lifter. It's just like some, it's like the, It's. It's like, you know, not the lead singer of a, Of a band that had. Was on sub pop 12 years ago. And it's just like, I, like, I, I. That's my nightmare because it's like anytime that I am being presented as someone that people would have an awareness of, first of all, they are never aware.

[B]

Right? But you don't want to be in a situation where it's presented and it just doesn't.

[A]

I had the word I was not to, you know, listen, obviously, we all know that I'm one of our nation's great philanthropists and volunteers, and so this isn't going to be news to people, but I was doing a little helping out at a kind of a. Like a. A shelter in the town that is near my town, you know, helping them out with some stuff. And somehow the guy who runs this. This whole operation, it's like a kind of transitional housing for folks. It's for teens that are experiencing homelessness. It's a really, really great organization, actually. But the guy who runs it was really psyched that I have. I'm on CBS Sunday morning, and he took me around to. And this is a big operation. They've got, like, multiple buildings and different kind of levels of care for folks and stuff. And everywhere we went, he introduced me to the most confused teens experiencing homelessness. Like, you could not find a group of people who is less aware of the Luke Burbank brain.

[B]

Talk about your P1 for CBS Sunday Morning.

[A]

God, it was just brutal. But he was saying, like, hey, by the way, this. This is Luke Burbank. This is like as if it's. It's as if he was bringing in Bad Bunny or something. Like, I don't know who's got the most. Who's got the highest Q rating right now in the world. It was just. It was absolutely brutal. There's like, 17 introductions of rooms full of people who could not have possibly cared less about it being me.

[C]

Yikes.

[B]

Yeah, here I go once again with the email. Every week, I hope that it's from a female. Oh, man. It's not from a female.

[A]

All right, we're getting short on time here, and we need to get to some emails or females. Although I have to to say, we had, like, a momentary break there. And I noticed Chris on your phone because I also like to peep what you're looking at on your phone. It's not just the laptop. I've also been going through your handwritten diaries, and there's some stuff in there that I wouldn't let out if I were you. No, I saw, like, a clip of baseball happening on your phone, and I realized this is totally not what we need to be doing right now. But I do feel like I want to kind of just like, download about the World Series with you all, because that was. I went into this whole thing being like, my position was like, I don't give a crap about MLB baseball that doesn't involve my team. And I have never been more hanging with every pitch of a World Series than I got into the last, like, two, three games of this thing.

[B]

Yeah. I was even at. I was at a dinner party at a friend's house on the night of Game 7, and it was like a very not sports crowd. But. But then as the time went on, like, all of us were, like, figuring out, like, how do we cast?

[A]

Right?

[B]

Like, to the. And then, like, everyone was watching and it was. And this is not, like, at all a sports crowd. I am curious how you guys feel because I've been thinking about this. Like, the Cubs went to game five with brewers and they. They lost. And it was a bummer, but it was good season. We won one series and we took the brewers to game five. The brewers proceeded to get swept by the Dodgers. And like, like, it was a buzzsaw. And you guys were talking about, like, if the Mariners, if the Blue Jays had been swept, it would be a little like, well, I'm glad that wasn't the end of our season.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But then at the same time, it also felt to me like, wow, the Blue Jays are really good. And literally came within a few inches. I don't know. Have you guys gotten into the Isaiah Kiner falafa?

[A]

The wedge ball? No, no. The.

[B]

The lead off third.

[C]

I didn't actually watch the World Series. I was only a scoreboard watching.

[B]

Can we do this? Can we do five minutes on this, please. So, but only with the.

[C]

Only with the Doogie music.

[B]

Yeah, with the Doogie stuff. Yeah. So in the bottom of the 10th, I think, right. They load the bases with one out, the blue Jays.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And there's a ground ball to the second baseman, Rojas, who had just hit.

[A]

The craziest, craziest home run to tie it in the ninth. A guy who has, like absolutely no power. He's the number nine hitter in the lineup and he just somehow yokes one into left field.

[B]

So Rojas, on this play, slips a little.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But he recovers and he throws to home Alejandra Kirk, the catcher. No, it's Will Smith, the catcher, extends his foot back, it comes off for a second, then comes back in and he's out at home. Now, if you look at the play, he's out at home by maybe 5 inches. If that, if that now.

[A]

And if he just for people that aren't totally up to speed on this, if he's safe, the World Series is over the top.

[B]

That's it. Like, those inches are the difference between walk off, right?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Okay. So then yesterday, everyone was looking at the runner who had come in a pinch run. Isaiah Kanafaleva, who had been on the Pirates earlier, came over the Blue Jays. His lead off third. He is taking zero lead off third. Oh, he has no lead off third. If he had done a lead five inches, normal second. There was even people, because everything could be quantified now. They were like, this was the. Out of 354 leads off third. This was the 351st, like shallowest. And he then said the coaches had coached him to hug the bag because it was one out and they did not want a line drive.

[A]

Yes, double play, which.

[B]

But literally, if he had taken one foot more. One foot. It's it. The Blue Jays win the World Series. That's the whole thing. This one little baserunning decision. And one of the things that was so amazing about this World Series was, yes, there are homers and there were great pitching, you know, performances. There were so many plays that were like these fielding plays and base running plays that things hinged on that were so just incredible, high level baseball happening. Guys getting thrown out at third on a blue single to the short right field.

[A]

Did you hear that Kike Hernandez, when he. To get from game six to game seven, there was this insane double play that ended game six. And K. Hernandez says he didn't ever see the ball until a second before it was in the lights. He just started running in the direction that he thought the ball was.

[C]

And this wasn't the collision or the collision in the outfield. Right. That was.

[B]

No, that was also crazy.

[A]

And that's also not the part where the ball got wedged under the padding, which is like one in a trillion for that to. I mean, so. Okay, this actually is. This is kind of what I was really curious about talking about, I guess, with both of you just as fans of sports and whatever Andrew, are you today? Like, here's what I'm trying to say. If I were a Toronto Blue Jays fan, I would be. And we have lots of Blue Jays fans that are listeners. Peace and love. I wonder, is this worse than not going to the World Series, to go to the World Series and to lose on? Because the whole thing you were saying, Andrew, was you didn't want the Mariners to lose in a weird, fluky, we're going to talk about it forever way. We will never stop talking about the time a ball got wedged under the pad and it was like. It was like it was the most cursed play that could ever happen for the Toronto Blue Jays in that. In that circumstance. And I almost feel. And again, I'm not trying to rub it in or make our Blue Jays listeners feel in any way worse, but I almost feel like I'm glad that that cup was passed from us. I don't think I could handle that we lost to the Blue Jays. I couldn't handle the losing the World Series with the ball being two outs away and you give up a home run to Rojas and the ball wedging under the padding.

[B]

I did not feel that I couldn't deal with it until I spent a day on the runner from Third Discourse because I was just like, oh, my God, this would really haunt me.

[A]

Now, the other.

[B]

The thing I will say though, that. And this relates to Mariners, too, and Andrew, I'm curious how you feel that. The Blue Jays are exceptionally good baseball team and the Mariners basically battled them essentially to even more or less. And this was basically a coin flip. I mean, truly, like, it was essentially an even series. Like, it was a 50, 50 series. There was a game that went 18 innings. Like, it was. It was so close. It does make me think, like, the Mariners are really good. Like, it's not a feeling of like, that was all like, yeah. But then the question of, like, the closer it is, the more tantalizing, you know, the possibility. What are you thinking?

[C]

So the question here is, is it more difficult? Would it have been more difficult had the Mariners made the World Series? Is that what you're asking, Chris?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Would you. In terms of ranking things like the Mariners making the World Series and losing like this, The Mariners losing to a Blue Jays team that got swept by the Dodgers or, like, you know, got their butts kicked. The Mariners or. Or what happened, the Mariners losing to a Blue Jays team that barely. Barely, barely lost.

[C]

Well, I guess, generally speaking, and this is me repeating myself, so hopefully it gets near what you're asking, but generally speaking, I still kind of feel like a bad fan because I'm not burning with anger about not making it to the world. Like, I listen to some people. And by the way, like, there's this one radio host here who I'm actually not a very big fan of, generally speaking, except I really appreciate his passion as a Mariners fan. And, like, he really holds the team accountable. He complains about them, even though there's a, you know, a financial agreement between his company and the team he's covering. You know, like, I really appreciate. And I've been listening to him a little bit here and there, and he's just still burning so hot over being eight outs away from making the World Series and how he can just not root for the Blue Jays at all. And that idea of not being able to even look at the team that just beat you, like, I feel like I know that feeling. I know it from being a Browns fan and maybe looking at the Ravens or the Steelers or what. Have you felt that about the brewers, for sure. Sure. Yeah. And otherwise, what a lovable team. Right? And City and Mar. You know, like. And. But you're just like, I can't. I can't watch Springer hit a dinger or whatever. Like, that kills me. And so that's. Why. Did you guys notice it rhymes? And so I did not want to watch the World Series because even though I truly was rooting for the Blue Jays to win, I really did not. I didn't have any ambiguity about it or any, you know, kind of. What's the word I'm looking for? I don't think ambiguity is the right word there, but cross pressure. Yeah. I was just like, no, I want the Blue Jays to win, but I don't want to see it. I don't. You know, I don't want to watch anybody celebrating. And I will say, though, the one. The one factor here that we need to consider is the Mariners have never made it to a World Series. So of course, having them make it and then even lose in a very painful way would have still been a huge thing Just to see them in a World Series.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. But I feel like for me, other than the Mariners winning the World Series, this was actually the best outcome for me, which was we played Toronto really well. We didn't have to then watch Toronto go and win, which would have hurt me. We also didn't watch the. The Dodgers shred them. You're right. There's this sort of transference of like.

[B]

Yeah, there is.

[A]

We played the Dodgers, we played the Blue Jays well, they played the Dodgers well, therefore we are a good team. But also, I don't have to, like, I don't have to be involved other than just as a spectator in the Kiner Falefa leadoff discourse. Like if, like, imagine if I was in the Eugenio. If we were in the Eugenio Suarez lead off discourse right now, I would be. I mean, I'd be in the. They'd find me at the bottom of the East River.

[B]

You'd be in the Badlands.

[A]

I would be. Absolutely. Speaking of, by the way, I just.

[C]

Got to get this. Ambivalence is the word I was looking for, not ambiguity. I just want everybody to know the word that I was actually looking for there is driving me nuts. All right, so do you guys want to do a really quick email here? Speaking of the Badlands, we got this note from our pal Max, who says, I've been inspired by your on the fly Badlands El Ropo imaging idea. And so I threw this together for you. I wanna mention that I have not heard this. Now, Badlands, Luke, is it a new segment? It's a new vibe on the show. How would you explain.

[A]

It'S a new way? I mean, we were just in it. Essentially, it's a new way for me to create even more niche programming with you in spite of the desires of the listeners, by saying, well, we've gone more than an hour, so now we're in the Badlands. It's purely so that I am even less constrained by. By the minimum requirements of doing this job in a good way.

[C]

So Max made a little audio imaging for it. I'll read you what he says about it after we hear it. And again, I think I mentioned this. I have not heard this yet. So a lot of Max, who also.

[A]

Does illustrations for us.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

Who played Richard Dreyfus in this Shark is broken.

[C]

Exactly.

[A]

I mean, this guy is a. Get him an EGOT. This guy is a quadruple threat 5 tool player. Absolutely.

[C]

Slow down, guys. We haven't heard it yet.

[A]

What's his lead off like?

[C]

All right. Take it away, Max. It's only a few seconds long. Let's take a listen. The Badlands. Oh, the Badlands.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Donkey, get over here. Wow. Summoning the.

[A]

So good.

[C]

That's very good.

[A]

I don't want to know what he did to that donkey. Make that sound the reason the donkey doesn't want to go over there.

[C]

He says that's a Sam Elliot slash Yosemite Sam impression. It sounds like. So there you go. Well, thank you, Max. Put that in the.

[A]

Sometimes you eat the donkey, sometimes the donkey eats you. Thanks, Max. Yeah, we'll fold that in. I loved getting that feedback from you, Chris, that you just sent us a message like, oh, my God, the El Ropo song.

[B]

Oh, that's it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I just. The thing that I loved about it, like, I like the way that I love the soul. Coughing was. It just. It brought me back to a small window of time. It was probably a total of 18 months where, like, autoplay, MIDI on. On websites was like a real thing.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And there was a period. It was a real narrow period of time. It's very generationally specific. If you're like, like a few years older or a few years younger, you missed this 100 listen and I was like, oh, my God. Remember?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Loading a website and. And being greeted with that kind of.

[C]

Audience or a MySpace page.

[B]

Yeah. That was the big. That was the biggest.

[C]

That was the biggest.

[B]

That is where it really blew up.

[C]

It was the epitome of our generation because we're, you know, we were probably maybe kind of at the. We're old now, speaking for, like, kind of the social media. But that was our generation sort of bringing social media to the forefront, I guess, is what I'm trying to say. And our generation is also very big on, like, music that defines us. I don't know if that's. I don't know if that's generational or not, but I will just say it is true of our generation. Right. It's like when you were in school, you decided who you were kind of based on your music, or maybe vice versa. Flip it on his head. But it was a way of identifying yourself. And so to have this social media thing where it's kind of like, welcome to my page. This is the song that represents me, you know, and it's Banded Gong by T. Rex.

[A]

For some reason, I knew that my first marriage was over when my first ex wife, this is a real story, changed her MySpace auto load song to some song by spoon. And it was. It was. I didn't even know, she listened to Spoon.

[B]

Oh, yeah, that's cool.

[A]

So we had been like. I had been living kind of going back and forth between New York and la, and the relationship was, you know, there was a lot of distance and kind of falling apart, but it was something about. Actually, she lived with me in that apartment down at the end of the street for a while. But it was something about being like, she's putting a song from a band that I didn't even know she listened to. This is who she is now. And it was this weird indicator.

[B]

Wake up call.

[A]

It was a total wake up call. It would have been for some people. For me, I was just like, well, we'll call this one the starter marriage. But it was strange at how much her switching her MySpace auto load song to Spoon was a. It was a leading indicator. Or again, she might have said a lagging indicator.

[B]

It was an indicator leading for you, lagging for her.

[A]

Exactly. As we would all come to learn. All right, well, listen, that's probably where we should wrap things up. Chris, thanks for doing this. I know you're.

[B]

Oh, it was a delight.

[A]

Your time is very valuable, as is studio time here in the steam room.

[C]

Yeah. How much do we owe you for studio time? What was it about? Are we.

[B]

I will send that.

[A]

John will get in touch that Venmo request.

[B]

And we're adding gas on top.

[A]

I do. The lighting in here is great. I gotta. I gotta talk to whoever your lighting person is. It's really nice. Anyway. All right, well, listen, thanks, everyone for spending this time with us. We will be back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio for all of you. So please, if you can, join us for that. In the meantime, have a great Monday, take care of yourselves. And please remember. Do you want to say Chris?

[B]

No mountain too tall.

[C]

And good luck to all.

[A]

Please.

[B]

Clap, power out.