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- [00:01]
Andrew Walsh
All clear. Go for it. Cool. This is like Mythbusters. Have you seen that show? What? Have you seen the show Mythbusters? No. Is it good? It is. What's the basis of it? Well, it's these two guys. Well, it's a little team, and they put myths to the test. Like, let me think of a good one here. Man, I'm drawing a blank. I watch this show all the time.
- [00:33]
Luke Burbank
I can't believe.
- [00:34]
Andrew Walsh
I can't think of one. Oh, it would be like, if somebody breaks a window on a plane, would that create a vacuum? And they put it to the test. Wow. Okay. Does it. Nope. Okay. You ready for this?
- [00:54]
Luke Burbank
Tbtm. Guess what day it is.
- [01:02]
Andrew Walsh
Guess what day it is.
- [01:04]
Luke Burbank
It's Friday. Friday.
- [01:06]
Andrew Walsh
Gotta get down on Friday. Everybody's looking forward to the weekend. Well, I think I'm looking forward to cracking up. I hope I can, like, you know, totally crack up. So I haven't, like, totally cracked up
- [01:19]
Luke Burbank
in a long time.
- [01:20]
Natalie
As my grandpa likes to say, hot diggity dog. As I like to say, hot damn.
- [01:26]
Luke Burbank
It's a cosmic mix of the action of the 90s combined with the exploitation films of the 70s. Definitely a little bit Michael Mann. It's kind of a cosmic gu. Dumbo. It almost wounds to the beat of jazz. Stop talking. Get off the phone, and let's do this. Let's do this immediately. Let's go. Well, all right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Friday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Are you sure? That's what they said on Ask Jeeves. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host.
- [02:01]
Andrew Walsh
You watch showmanship. You got it.
- [02:03]
Luke Burbank
Coming to you for the final day from Kansas City, Missouri. Beautiful Kansas City, Missouri, where it's another sunny day. It's like I'm walking on sunshine. I saw kids in shorts playing in the playground at the YMCA that I can see from my hotel room. Now, that's a. That might be a little much. We sending the kids. I don't want to get into judging people's parenting, but sending the kids in shorts in February, Even at the end of February, this is our final show of the month. It's a little extreme, but okay. You know what? To each their own. It's a beautiful day here in Kansas City, and we've got a Beautiful episode of TBTL in store for you. It is episode 4673 in a collector series. Let the fun begin. Big news in the world of mascots. You call them a mascot? If they're not for a sports team. Apparently, Mr. Clean is retiring.
- [03:03]
Andrew Walsh
Clean as your mama's forehead.
- [03:05]
Luke Burbank
I don't like saying any of those words because I feel like I'm buying into some sort of a, you know, a sort of media event that has been generated just so that I'll say those words because Mr. Clean's not a person. But I guess they're gonna stop having him as the spokesperson for their product, for their cleaning products. Anyway, we'll talk about that and whatever else comes into our little brains on this Friday with this dude. Longest running cobra of the show may be best known for his depictions of the tall ships. I happen to know a guy who's at his limit. He is Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.
- [03:41]
Andrew Walsh
Good morning, Luke. If the answer to this question is yes, I will fix it in post. But did you hear me chomping down on mini oranges, just chewing right into the microphone during that intro? No. Okay, interesting. Well, then maybe I'll just leave it being people. I had a false start at the beginning of the show. We were starting to record, and then I muted my mic and then unmuted it. And then I. I don't know, I thought I had it muted, but apparently the last time I unmuted it and then I was just housing those little satsumas, the little oranges. By the way, quick question on that. When you grab. You like satsumas, right? Or do you. Do you not?
- [04:23]
Luke Burbank
I do. I do. I don't think to buy them, to keep them or to consume them. But when I am consuming them, I think, oh, I should do this more. So, yeah, I do like them.
- [04:33]
Andrew Walsh
Okay, you do like them. But it's not kind of a constant thing. Like, I always. I've been eating.
- [04:36]
Luke Burbank
I don't like you, Mr. Orange. Wait, that name's already kind of taken.
- [04:39]
Andrew Walsh
Is Mr. Orange taken?
- [04:41]
Luke Burbank
Well, people sometimes say that about Trump, you know, oh, the orange one. Orange guy.
- [04:45]
Andrew Walsh
Well, what if I. What if I. It could be Orange Julius. Like, oh, is that taken? That's not taken. I mean, Julius a lot. No, you know, I really do that. Is there such a thing as eating too much citrus? Like, can you like citrus staves off scurvy, right? I'm not going to give myself scurvy. Like, I don't know if there's any bad side effects aside from, like, the acid, like, eating away your teeth or whatever. You got to be kind of careful with that stuff. But I've been eating, so I always like Citrus. But lately I've been eating like a grapefruit a day. And that is not even half of the citrus that I've been consuming. I eat so much, so much oranges and grapefruits.
- [05:26]
Luke Burbank
I wonder if you actually have like a deficiency that, you know, because sometimes when you crave something, it's because your body is trying to, you know, get some balance in some department. I wonder if. If your body is.
- [05:37]
Andrew Walsh
If you're.
- [05:38]
Luke Burbank
If you're, you know, dangerously low on hot dogs or whatever they say.
- [05:41]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, maybe.
- [05:42]
Luke Burbank
No, but I wonder if, like. I really wonder if you're like, I talked about this before, but like, nobody chews more ice than Becca and which I can't even do anymore, Andrew. Like, here's. I need to go to the dentist. Because the last time I was at the dentist, they had me bite down. Have they ever done this to you? They had me bite down on this little like kind of round plastic stick thing.
- [06:04]
Andrew Walsh
No. To.
- [06:05]
Luke Burbank
To see if I had any pain anywhere.
- [06:07]
Andrew Walsh
No.
- [06:08]
Luke Burbank
And my very one, my very back teeth was a little painful, but I didn't really want to tell them because I didn't want to have to get. It was like, oh, that didn't feel great. But it's like, didn't seem like it was, you know, super critical. And I felt like if I admitted that it hurt, then they were gonna like, you know, do a root canal on site or something. But that tooth now is definitely like starting to be more sort of. What it is, is I have to do a lot more thinking about what side of my mouth I'm chewing on now than before, which isn't make me feeling. Make me feel the youngest. But anyway, Becca just chews ice all the time and I think it's because she has like an iron deficiency or something. Well, I mean, pica, there's a whole name for it. So you have whatever the pica of oranges is, I guess.
- [06:51]
Andrew Walsh
But I mean, people just also snack on things and for some reason, like it's late at night. Like we don't have. Here's the deal. Late at night, I have zero self control. So for the most part I don't buy cookies during the day or any kind of swee. Have like a lot of sweets around the house. Every now and then Genevieve will have a sweet tooth and she'll stash them away. I don't have a huge sweet tooth anyway, so I'm not usually buying like kind of, you know, desserts from the grocery store anyway. But if they are around, like, if Genevieve has some dinner event and comes back with some extra, you know, whatever kind of dessert, cookies, brownies, whatever. Like, I will certainly. It'll be some time of night, and I'll be like, oh, there are cookies. And I won't be able to say no to them. So for the most part, I try not to invite them into the house. Because when I have, like, a vampire. Yeah. Because when I have. When I have vampire, when I have willpower, I'm like, well, you know, you're not gonna have willpower later. But I don't feel bad about eating too much grapefruit late at night or something like that. No, I just have a lot of it around. And then during the day, I grab them. But my original question was, and I guess this, does this kind of falls apart because it's not part of your daily habit. And now we've established me as some sort of a citrus freak. But I want to know what is the average number of satsumas somebody grabs for just like a quick snack like this? Like, it's lunchtime right now. You think, too, I grabbed three, so I am on the outside.
- [08:12]
Luke Burbank
The AI overview says craving oranges often signals a need for vitamin C, hydration, or natural sugars. It might be especially during immune boosting, cold weather, or stressful periods. These cravings can also stem from iron deficiencies or emotional comfort seeking. While nutritious, excessive consumption may cause digestive discomfort or acidity. And they're citing the Times of India as their source on this.
- [08:38]
Andrew Walsh
Isn't it weird how the Times of India pops up on a lot of stuff?
- [08:41]
Luke Burbank
What is the deal with the Times?
- [08:43]
Andrew Walsh
I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about, right? This is not the first time you've run into this.
- [08:48]
Luke Burbank
I've never in my life thought I should check what the Times of India thinks about this. And yet, whenever, when you're looking for some semi obscure piece of information, it seems like there's always an article about it in the Times of India. Which makes me think, Andrew, I wonder if the Times of India is even a real thing or if it is not just a very complicated Internet thing that is built to, like, respond to queries, if that makes any sense. Like, it's a very sort of CEO kind of designed thing where, like, is it. How is it that so many times when there are no articles about anything about something, there is one in the Times of India.
- [09:30]
Andrew Walsh
I am working weird. I'm working on a meme idea here in the. In the kind of parlance, in the Internet parlance of the day.
- [09:38]
Luke Burbank
It's like a meme in the book.
- [09:39]
Andrew Walsh
It's like nobody, colon, blank space. Absolutely nobody, colon, blank space. Times of India. Too many oranges will give you bubble guts. Like the Times of India is always just rearing its head. And I'm not. Not necessarily. I mean, I don't know if rearing its head. I didn't say ugly head, but maybe it's a beautiful head. But are you googling this as we speak or will that take the whole operation down?
- [10:02]
Luke Burbank
I'm worried about it taking the operation down, but I'm just saying breaking that. It is strange to me that oftentimes when I'm trying to find something, you know, to confirm something in my mind, was that really how that is or you know, is this thing the way I thought it was, et cetera. It seems like when no one on the Internet is talking about something, the Times of India still is.
- [10:22]
Andrew Walsh
It's the. According to Wikipedia, it's the largest. Oh, selling. The largest selling English language daily newspaper in the world. I mean there's. Because it isn't. It's an English language newspaper out of India, but it's only the third largest newspaper in India.
- [10:38]
Luke Burbank
Sure. What about the Hindustan Times?
- [10:40]
Andrew Walsh
Is that number one with a bullet?
- [10:43]
Luke Burbank
I'm guessing maybe it's big as that's. I've not read the Hindustan Times, but I've also seen it referenced many times.
- [10:49]
Andrew Walsh
I mean it goes back to the 1800s apparently. 1838. So you know, it has, you know, it definitely started as just like a regular newspaper and. Yeah, I mean sometimes though you. I feel like sometimes I also get this similar things with maybe the Guardian or something. Although the Guardian seems to be a little bit news based. But you're right, it must just be that they have so many articles and they've covered so many things. Right. And so at some point the Times of India had a piece about. It's a little bit like Reader's Digest like we were talking about yesterday. I mean, I'll bet you a million dollars that Reader's Digest has some peace. That was written at some point about citrus in your life.
- [11:32]
Luke Burbank
You know, the reason I'm suspicious of the Times of India is because there is this other weird thing that now goes on with the Internet which is when I'm trying to find product reviews, like if I'm not on ol wire cutter, there are all of these crazy websites that will be. They sort of. How do I put this? It'll be. I'll be like, hey, what's the best rice cooker? Or something I've been, by the way, I don't think, I think I'm going to send the rice cooker back because not only did I make some rice very successfully in the pot the other day, our boy John Sklaroff sent me this whole other thing which is where you like, you boil it, but then you boil the water, but then you put the rice in a casserole dish and then you pour the water in there. That seems to be working out in his household. But there are these reviews of products that will look like it's a Washington Post is reviewing this rice cooker, but they're not. It's like you'll just see all of these. What they've done is they've somehow basically like somebody wants to sell you a thing. I think there's some piece of software that will make it seem like you're going to click on something that says like a Washington Post review or a maybe not New York Times because of the wire cutter, but like they'll take all of these kind of known media entities and somehow just reproduce these kind of garbage made up websites, but using the names of these real things to sort of make it seem like, oh, the Washington Post said that this is the best rice cooker and it's clearly just something that they've figured out how to do on the Internet. I don't even know if somebody built these things specifically or if it's just, I don't understand obviously web design or the Internet. But it seems almost like these things are just getting built because I searched for them, because I'm trying to find out what the best rice cooker is.
- [13:08]
Andrew Walsh
Okay, listen, this article on Wikipedia about the Times of India is very dense and I'm just sort of reading this on the fly, which I know is not the best podcasting in the world. But there is something to what you're saying about, about just being generally skeptical of this publication. And near the end of this article it says paid news. The Times of India has been criticized for being the first to institutionalize the practice of paid news in India where politicians, businessmen, corporations, celebrities can pay the newspaper and its journalists will carry the desired news for the payor. The person who's paying the newspaper offers prominence with which paid news is placed right on the page. And it is blade with the amount of payment, but either way. And it also sounds like they got caught in some sort of a sting operation where they were accepting money to write right wing articles and stuff. Let's see here in 2018, some sting operation. They were caught on camera as a part of a sting operation by Cobra Post. I don't know, that is agreeing to promote right wing content through the group's many media properties for about, let's see, US $80 million. So anyway, point. Yeah, I think it's just sort of like maybe another reason this is popping up a lot is because of what we were talking about yesterday during the daily donors, like paid promotional results in search engines.
- [14:36]
Luke Burbank
I wonder what they think about the pronunciation of Olathe, Kansas. Because tell you what, I'm going out to Olathe, Kansas, which is outside of Kansas City, to do this TV story about the sport. We'll call it a sport, the Game of Bingo. And I told you this the other day off air. But like I've been, I'm actually really, you know what I want to give the TBTL listeners, particularly those in the greater Kansas and Missouri area, I want to give you some credit for not just absolutely lighting me up. Because every time I talked about this trip, I was mispronouncing the name of this suburb of Kansas City. It looks like it's oh, laughy. It should be Olathi, but it's not. And when I got into the Uber and I was being taken to the hotel, I said, oh yeah, I'm gonna be out in Olaf. And he was like, nope, it's Olathe.
- [15:22]
Andrew Walsh
It's so funny because as you were saying that I was like, oh, because I couldn't remember how you pronounce it or what the proper pronunciation is. But somebody did. One person did text us yesterday, the day before, and I was gonna check that, but it sounds like you kind of got to that realization on your own.
- [15:37]
Luke Burbank
I did. And I was really glad that I got to it before I like was asking someone at this American Legion a question about their love of bingo and their love of their town, et cetera. Because there's nothing, I feel like there's nothing that would alienate these folks faster than me coming in big out of town or from war torn Portland, Oregon and then mispronouncing the name of their town. That would have been a very bad look.
- [16:00]
Andrew Walsh
Now while I was looking for that text message regarding the pronunciation, I am seeing a different text message that we got on Wednesday from a listener who I don't have their name saved in our system. So I don't know who is texting this, but it's from a 206 number, but it says Luke says he's in Kansas City and occurred to me that he may enjoy this museum. About this paddle wheeler that sank in the 1860s. It was discovered buried 45ft deep in a cornfield in the 1980s after the river had shifted course. It sank so quickly it went down with all of its cargo, which is now in a museum. I found it fascinating. Luke might, too. I'm posting this here because he'll never see my email, but no pressure to send it to him. It's just a thought. Oh, I see there's a link here. It's 1856.com 1856-com. Must be a link to the actual museum. That actually is really interesting. Just in the 1980s, just to find a sunken boat in your cornfield.
- [16:59]
Luke Burbank
That sounds amazing. Now, I wonder, speaking of media properties, I wonder, do we think when was the state of the of Kansas founded? Was it 1856? Because there are a series of magazines, right. That are about the states that they're in. I think this might be a chain, and they are usually. The name of the magazine, I think is the date when the state was founded.
- [17:21]
Andrew Walsh
Well, listen to this. So this boat sank in 1856. So I think that's why when you open up the website for the Arabia steamboat museum, sank 1856, recovered 1988. The beautiful, like, images, like renderings and photographs, paintings of this boat and everything. But then it says the Arabia is closing November 2026. All stories, even great ones, must come to an end. The Arabia Steamboat Museum will be closing its doors November 2026, after 30 years in Kansas City. Luke, you got to go.
- [18:00]
Luke Burbank
Okay? Show is over.
- [18:01]
Andrew Walsh
Okay?
- [18:02]
Luke Burbank
I'm. I'm getting in an Uber and I'm going directly to the Arabia Steamboat Museum while I still can. Actually, now I'm looking at. This is really cool.
- [18:10]
Andrew Walsh
I mean, why is this not. Why is this not a CBS Sunday morning story?
- [18:13]
Luke Burbank
Well, you know what I'm gonna now probably have to do a story on is a chimney sweep convention. Because at dinner last night, you say chimney sweep.
- [18:21]
Andrew Walsh
It broke up a little. The line broke up a little bit. I did chimney sweep.
- [18:24]
Luke Burbank
I said chimney sweep.
- [18:25]
Andrew Walsh
Okay.
- [18:26]
Luke Burbank
I'm getting dinner last night, and I'm just sitting at the bar by myself. And there's like, this town. Let me tell you, they got the conventions going like you wouldn't believe here in Kansas City, Andrew. And particularly in my hotel. It is like, I get in the elevator the other day, and there's. There was some kind of a. Literally, it's like a grain elevator convention. So it's a convention for people that work in the industry of storing grain. And the one guy. These two guys didn't know each other, but they both had lanyards on. They start talking grain elevators. And the one guy goes, oh, yeah, we put one of your. We put one of your units in. We had an old B52. We pulled that piece of shit out and put yours in. There's laughing and laughing about the grain elevator sensor. I love that or whatever.
- [19:11]
Andrew Walsh
I love that so much.
- [19:13]
Luke Burbank
It's like. It is just the most Midwest thing. But anyway, I. So it seemed that everybody in the. At this restaurant I was at, everybody in the bar where I was eating, everybody was like, you know, they just had the look like a kind of a guy in a polo shirt with a certain kind of haircut. They just look like convention ears to me. And, you know, I'm getting my salad and I'm kind of settling, and I put my little headphones in. I'm gonna, like, scroll some TikTok or whatever. And the guy around the corner of the bar looks at me, and he smiles really broadly. And I kind of smile at him, and I go back to what I'm doing. And then a minute later, he looks over and smiles again, and. And he says. I take my headphones and he goes, are you on television? And I was like, I am. He goes, yeah, you're on CBS Sunday Morning. I love that show. I watch it. I watch it every day. And it was both flattering, but also deeply embarrassing.
- [20:00]
Andrew Walsh
He watches it every day, even not on Sunday.
- [20:03]
Luke Burbank
Tapes it, Watches it twice on Sunday. No, he said, I watch it every week. But I was. It's so funny because you think. I mean, it was flattering. It was nice that the guy recognized me. But Also, there's, like, 20 strangers sitting at this bar in, like. It's kind of like a semicircle, like a kind of horseshoe thing. And now it was like, I felt deeply observed. Now all of a sudden, like. Or you know what I mean? Like, I felt like the guy next to me who did not recognize me from television was probably like, oh, okay, this guy's on tv. Like, I just. I felt like all of a sudden there was going to be more awareness of my existence than I really wanted there to be. I just wanted to sit there and have my food. But anyway, that guy then came over and introduced himself, and he's here for a chimney sweep convention.
- [20:43]
Andrew Walsh
That's incredible, right?
- [20:45]
Luke Burbank
And it actually sounds like a pretty good Sunday morning story. Like, what's up with chimney sweeps? And he said, next year, the convention is in Hershey, Pennsylvania. It's the 50th anniversary of the chimney sweep convention. And it's. I guess the American chimney sweep industry was founded in Hershey, Pennsylvania. That's why they're having the big convention in Hershey next year.
- [21:07]
Andrew Walsh
Interesting.
- [21:08]
Luke Burbank
That's got CBS Sunday Morning written all over it.
- [21:10]
Andrew Walsh
Can I write it for you? Move over, Dick Van. I'm doing a genie moose. Maybe this is. Maybe this is.
- [21:17]
Luke Burbank
I thought that was an impression of me. And truthfully, it hurt.
- [21:20]
Andrew Walsh
No, Move over, Dick Van Dyke. And then we cut to Chim chimmery. Chim chimmery. Then he says, there's a new chimney sweep in town. And then there's like 14 more cultural references from the 1960s.
- [21:34]
Luke Burbank
I definitely already assume that if I do end up doing this TV story, that the character of Dick Van Dyke from Mary Poppins will absolutely be invoked. Yeah, 100 will probably start and end the piece. In fact, the whole thing is an excuse to just show footage of the adorable Dick Van Dyke.
- [21:52]
Andrew Walsh
In fact, maybe CBS should just show Mary Poppins instead.
- [21:57]
Luke Burbank
I mean, there's certainly a lot of programming we're putting on lately that I think would be improved before Mary Poppins.
- [22:03]
Andrew Walsh
Don't me wrong. I'm not asking. Not asking anybody to push Whiskey Friday out of the way. Like, I'm hoping that whatever happened with that, I have a feeling that the. The backlash maybe put the kibosh on that. I don't know.
- [22:16]
Luke Burbank
Hey, speaking of Whiskey Friday, do you have big weekend plans, my friend?
- [22:19]
Andrew Walsh
Do I have big weekend plans? Now this is an interesting question that comes Friday question. The biggest one I've ever had.
- [22:31]
Luke Burbank
Big weekend. We never get in trouble for this song. Dude, does this song ever get us pulled down?
- [22:37]
Andrew Walsh
You know, that's a really good point. No, I don't think the bots recognize this because I. I get little dings even on the Razzle Dazzle song sometimes. Like a lot of our stuff. Every now and then it catches the filters. I think I told you Flock of Seagulls. I was doing such a. I thought I was being so careful by playing it underneath us talking. But no, they heard it. Anyway, I don't, you know, I don't have huge weekend plans. I do know that Saturday I'm recording a podcast with my friend Hannah Brooks Olson, and I think Veeves and I might try to get a little thing, get a few projects done around the house, but that's about it. What about you?
- [23:11]
Luke Burbank
I will be going out to dinner in Portland on Saturday night. Tbd, where we're going somewhere that Becca is picking. Basically what happens is when I. When I leave town for a long duration, like I have been this week, then I feel like I owe. Hi. Oh, Becca. A date night. Some kind of a, you know, confirmation that I am, in fact, a good boyfriend. So we'll be doing, I guess that on Saturday, going out somewhere, exploring all that Portland has to offer. How is your. How's your construction project going, by the way?
- [23:44]
Andrew Walsh
Is it still good? Yeah, it's interesting. I mean, it's been a really kind of interesting, fun project. Veebs and I have been talking about, like, whether or not this is kind of an interesting topic, like, whether or not we should have the project continue while we're out of town. Because when we started this, we're all. I think this sounds like bad planning, but we're all pretty much on the same page. Me, Genevieve, and the contractor, which is like, we're kind of. Like, we're not in any kind of huge rush. We're experimenting as we go along. Yesterday, Adrian said to me, I've never done anything like this before.
- [24:16]
Luke Burbank
Exactly what you want to hear as
- [24:17]
Andrew Walsh
he's sawing up, like, he's buying special blades that can cut all the way through the bowling alley floor that is making up our little new shelving cubby hole unit. And so we weren't sure if this was going to all be done before we went on our trip. But, no, it's most certainly not going to be. And so I'm sort of. We're toying around with the idea of just letting the project continue while we're not here by giving them access to the basement and then keeping Bingo the cat upstairs. And we'll have a cat sitter coming in to check on Bingo. I mean, the good thing about our house is because it used to be two different units, There are these doors that are not exactly the most sightly things in the world, but they are very handy. If you do need to keep Bingo, like, isolated upstairs, you can close off all the doors and have this almost be, like, a totally separate unit that a cat sitter will come and look after him. And then downstairs, the project can continue. I'm a little bit on the fence on this because I like the idea of keeping things rolling and certainly not wasting the contractor's time. But on the other hand, like, kind of not being on site. If you sort of see something, they're like, oh, that's not quite how I pictured it. Like, let's Move this over here or, you know, can we finish this more? What are your thoughts on that?
- [25:31]
Luke Burbank
Well, I guess it kind of depends on where the project is at the point that you're going to leave town. I think, because I'm impatient, I would always just like things to be continuing to progress. I wouldn't want to take a week off of the progress. So I guess my tendency would be towards risking, you know, something happening that wasn't exactly what you were looking for with the trade off of being the project will get done that much faster.
- [25:57]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, yeah, I'm. We're leaning towards that because at first I was telling these, like, oh, we got to remind them that we're, you know, we're. They're gonna have to take a break. And then Viv's and I both paused, and then we both looked at each other and said, or do they have to take a break? Like, maybe this makes sense. And also, like, this sounds. This sounds cuckoo bananas, I realize, but, like, the bond between Adrian the contractor and our cat Bingo is a strong bond. And while I am not asking for or paying for extra cat sitting services, I also know that, like, as part of me was like, well, I definitely. Even though they're so careful, the workers are so, so careful and meticulous, really, about everything. But especially I don't know how much about. I don't know how much to say about this, because these guys know I do this podcast. They could potentially hear it, too. And it's a little bit weird talking about people knowing they might hear it, but it's so funny. So the two workers are Adrian, the main contractor, and this guy Michael, who's a young man who I was telling you about on the show, and Adrian. And so Michael works for Adrian. And Adrian is so, like, persnickety about the way Mike. Like, he's like, one time, like, I think Michael just wore his shoes. Like, we don't care. Like, I don't want mud tracked in and out and in and out of the house. But they put down all these sheets or something. And for one second, Michael was standing, like, off a sheet or something, and Adrian was like, Michael. Like, he's like, really? They're both very, very sweet guys. It's not toxic, but you can just tell that Adrian is very much like, there are rules for how we act around the clients, right? And yesterday, Michael. Because Michael and I have plenty of conversations about all kinds of things and when Adrian isn't around. But then we're outside talking, all three of us, and Michael called Me, dude. And Adrian turned. He said, dude. You're calling him dude? And, like, Michael, I don't think it was a bit. I think Adrian did not like this guy being too familiar. Familiar with me, which is obviously, like, not. That is not an issue. But anyway, they're very meticulous. And dude. Well, I don't like it when you call me that, Luke.
- [27:59]
Luke Burbank
Yeah, I'm sorry.
- [28:00]
Andrew Walsh
I mean, Michael have a thing, man. You have to earn that kind of respect from me. But anyway, even though they're so, so careful about coming in and out and, like, every aspect of it, and they would not let anything bad happen to bingo, I would be a little bit more anxious in Hawaii, thinking, like, okay, well, bingo could be down in the basement, and doors are being open and doors are being closed. And if something happens, we're not. But then we're like, well, if we really keep bingo isolated to the upstairs and let the workers come and go, I know Adrian will every now and then just go up and say hello to Bingo, because he can't. Not Right.
- [28:34]
Luke Burbank
So the plan otherwise is Bingo gonna stay at your house, and you're gonna have someone come visit and feed and eat. Yeah.
- [28:40]
Andrew Walsh
Either way, Bingo always stays home. And we get a cat sitter. I think it's probably our friend Yvonne or somebody like that that we hire. And there's plenty of attention. Sometimes our friends Camaro, Kevin, and Nita will come, but have that all set up. And we always have people come a couple of times a day because bingo needs his people, you know, and so that's always the case. But we're just sort of thinking, oh, well, we can lock bingo upstairs and have cat sitters come and go up there, and then have the workers come and go through the basement door. And I don't have to worry about, you know, another risk of bingo getting out, which can just happen at any point. Right. But I also know that because Adrian loves this cat so much, it'll also be, like, extra attention. I see a little bit of extra attention for Bingo, like, because Bingo, I think it's really bummed out when there aren't people around for long periods of time.
- [29:30]
Luke Burbank
Yeah. Well, I think you've now talked yourself into probably allowing the construction to continue while you're out of town. So I think we've decided, so let it be written, so let it be done.
- [29:42]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. So anyway. But you asked about the project, and it's coming together like this. I will say this. This area that we're using, the reclaimed bowling alley wood. And then as the backdrop of this little cubby and then the two walls. We're gon reclaimed wood from a gymnasium, which is really cool. I thought they were going to be finished down further than they are, but they're still that kind of lacquered floor. And so that I was a little surprised about. It's a little bit kitschier than I thought, but I think it's going to come together very nicely. Again, there's a lot of attention to detail here, which I really, really appreciate, so I'm still confident in it. But seeing that it's like, oh, yeah. This still really says, like, kind of varnished wood. Like, it seems a little. But given the vibe of our basement, I'm happy with that. But it also has sort of, like, made me realize, oh, maybe we should switch back to, like, butcher block for some of these other things. Like, it's kind of been fun to. We're literally all learning as we do this, and it seems like pretty good workmanship and a pretty good deal, but also sort of like, it's been a little bit of experimental. You know, I'm kind of a jazz man. Sure. And so it's been a really interesting experience and project. Kind of fun to be able to sort of see. Oh, okay. Well, this is how this is turning out. Well, now we can sort of adjust our vision for over here. Because I don't want, you know, me. I don't want this whole area to be, like, too campy or anything like that.
- [31:07]
Luke Burbank
You don't want to feel like you're in John Waters.
- [31:09]
Andrew Walsh
Right, Exactly. I think that having this one little cupboard area, little, like, open shelf area that is like a little cubby hole. Having it be that way is a nice little, like, kind of nod to, you know, again, like, I was talking to somebody. Was it Roden? It was somebody. I can't remember who I was talking to. They're like, well, that. That wood you're probably using is probably from the old Ballard Lanes. That was so below Sunset Lanes, because maybe it was Scott Carty who was mentioning this to me or something, because he kind of works. He's like, well, if he bought it at Ballard Reuse, like, where else is this bowling alley that would be coming from?
- [31:45]
Luke Burbank
That would be insane. I didn't even think about that, you know.
- [31:47]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah.
- [31:48]
Luke Burbank
That one of the most important places to my twenties was Sunset Lanes in Ballard.
- [31:53]
Andrew Walsh
And I never had the opportunity to go there myself, but I know that it was beloved by everybody. It was like. It was almost. I mean, I think Ballard, I'm sorry, Sunset Lanes. Tell me if I'm wrong about this, because I think it was gone right before I got here. But I would hear about it a lot from all kinds of people. And it almost became like a symbol of changing Seattle. Right. And changing Ballard.
- [32:14]
Luke Burbank
Absolutely. Because, yeah, Sunset Lanes was this, you know, kind of place that we grew up going to as kids. Although we would go. Peter and I would go to Leilani Lanes more frequently up in Greenwood. But, yeah, you'd go there as a kid. And then you get old enough that you can actually go in the bar. And they had karaoke. I mean, that was where Radke did Mack the Knife back in the day. Like at karaoke at Sunset Lanes. And. Yeah, then when they tore that down, they also. They tore down the Denny's. The Goo Gy Dennys.
- [32:41]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, right.
- [32:42]
Luke Burbank
That was like a complete travesty because it was. It was being historically preserved and that designation expired for like 12 hours or something. There was this weird window of time where it wasn't being enforced for some reason. And they just came in with the wrecking ball and just like, knocked it down. So you had that Denny's, you had the Sunset Lanes. You did also have Leilani Lanes up. Up in Greenwood. Just all of these places, particularly in Ballard, that were getting torn down and replaced with just, you know, particularly that building they put up where the Denny's was. It's just the worst example. I was actually watching Charles Madeta and somebody else from the Stranger just analyzing the architecture of that corner and how just truly horrible it is.
- [33:21]
Andrew Walsh
What's the corner? Would I know it?
- [33:23]
Luke Burbank
Yeah, you would. It would be. Let's see, is that 15th and, like, market?
- [33:30]
Andrew Walsh
Okay. Oh, wow. Okay. So right there in the heart of things, right?
- [33:33]
Luke Burbank
Yeah. And that's where Denny's was. Was across the street. Kind of across the street and a little. And some parking lots from where Sunset Lanes was. But, like, they basically knocked down this Denny's to build this giant, you know, mixed use building that's kind of not any particular architectural style. And it's just kind of not. It's not a particularly appealing building. I mean, you know, people need to live somewhere. So I guess that part of it's kind of good. But I love the fact that you. And I'm gonna tell myself, and I'm gonna tell anyone who will listen that it's definitely from Sunset Lanes in your house. I'm jealous, actually. Like, that's the kind of thing I'd want to have somewhere where I live. And I could tell the story of like, yeah, this is from a bowling alley that I used to go to constantly in my 20s. Like, that's a very cool little artifact.
- [34:16]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. I wish I had a personal connection to the place I'm looking. I guess it was called Sunset Bowl. Technically, everything is Sunset bowl, but I guess it closed. Let's see here. It says, Sunset bowl in Ballard will close.
- [34:25]
Luke Burbank
Why did we always call it Sunset Lanes? I guess we were just. I was just calling it the wrong thing.
- [34:29]
Andrew Walsh
And that was. Let's see. So it closed in April of 2008 and I got here in like, what, January of 2009 or something like that. So I missed.
- [34:36]
Luke Burbank
You would have loved it.
- [34:37]
Andrew Walsh
Half a year. Yeah. No looking at photos. And I love bowling and I love, like kind of classic bowling and stuff. So I do. It's funny you said, like, you're just going to believe that this is from Sunset bowl, this wood that we have.
- [34:49]
Luke Burbank
I can't.
- [34:49]
Andrew Walsh
I mean, is there a way. Is there a way for me to confirm that I was actually just sort
- [34:53]
Luke Burbank
of fantasizing DNA test.
- [34:57]
Andrew Walsh
Should I. Maury, is Maury Povich still around? Me and this huge ass piece of wood are sitting on the.
- [35:04]
Luke Burbank
Maury Povich, you are not the father.
- [35:07]
Andrew Walsh
No.
- [35:07]
Luke Burbank
In the run to the fainting couch,
- [35:09]
Andrew Walsh
I want to be, but I wonder if there would be a way for me to confirm that. But I mean, I guess I think it was Scott Carty, who also worked in. Would it be the construction business? You know, our buddy Scott, who's in radio. And I think it was him saying. He's like, well, of course it's from Sunset Lanes or Bowl or whatever you
- [35:27]
Luke Burbank
could do if you cared to. I mean, what you could do is go back to the Ballard Restore or whatever the place is you got it from and just ask around because somebody would remember when that shipment came in and where it had been previously.
- [35:37]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, I actually might do that without being too much of a weirdo because it would be kind of nice to know what is the origin of it. But I do think it's cool. And I don't dislike, like what it is, but it has sort of. It's a little. It's a little bit different than I expected it so far. But I've also seen what they've done with this wood. So I was starting to tell them. I'm like, well, you know, I thought we were finishing this more. Let's just make sure that we have, like really nice finished wood for like the. The counters and stuff in the actual kitchen area. I want that just to be a really nice, cool little kitchen down there. And then yesterday, they spent the day sanding and grinding down the back of the wood. So the back of the wood, which would have been facing, you know, the ground or whatever, has this black paint on it or whatever. And they had to remove this with various tools and grinders and stuff. And it is beautiful underneath. It is. It is. Eased all of my fears about this knot. So, like, for the countertops and everything, it's going to be very, very nice wood. And. But we'll still have it.
- [36:35]
Luke Burbank
Bowling alley wood is also going to
- [36:37]
Andrew Walsh
be the countertop, I believe. Gymnasium. And I don't know where the gymnasium came from. Yeah. But. But when it. Once it's stripped down and, like, really sanded and everything, it's really, really beautiful wood. So I'm very excited about that.
- [36:51]
Luke Burbank
You realize this is kind of a missed opportunity with all this bowling alley stuff you've got. You could have put a lane in your basement and gone full.
- [37:00]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. Where we.
- [37:00]
Luke Burbank
Not there will be blood.
- [37:01]
Andrew Walsh
I thought we were talking about that on this show. Maybe I was spoofing with somebody else, but that's what I was saying. Like, why? Maybe I was just talking with the guys out in the driveway. I'm just like, why don't we. Just before they started chopping it up, I was like, why don't we just make it a bowling alley? Just like a one. But I think the determination there was that I was insane. So.
- [37:22]
Luke Burbank
Yeah. And then again, cut to 20, 40 years from now, you're down there full. Daniel Day Lewis, you've got a bowling pin. For some reason, you're mad at me. It does not end well.
- [37:33]
Andrew Walsh
I've got a milk milkshake.
- [37:35]
Luke Burbank
For some reason. Yeah. Basically, I've got a milkshake, and you're drinking it as well.
- [37:39]
Andrew Walsh
And it's a shamrock shake, and it's so Good.
- [37:42]
Luke Burbank
Yeah. The McRib is back. We was hoping for some razzle D. Razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle. That's right, man. Razzle dazzle. On your mark. On your mark.
- [37:51]
Andrew Walsh
Get set, get set. Now. Ready, ready, go.
- [37:55]
Luke Burbank
Everybody. Razzle dazzle. All right, it's time to thank some dazzling donors. These folks I'm about to tell you about are donating a dazzling amount of dough each month to this program. And when we add all that up, it allows this to be a job for me and Andrew and John Sklaroff. And I like having this as my job. It's a fun job to have. We had a Listener yesterday a donor saying that their new job does not make them feel like a husk anymore. That's right. And I'm very fortunate that this does not make me. Some things I do do make me feel even the slightest bit like a husk. But not this job. This job I love doing and I love having it. And I can have it because of Nancy Rohrer in Tacoma, Washington.
- [38:37]
Andrew Walsh
Hey, Nancy.
- [38:38]
Luke Burbank
What up, Nance? Nancy says, dear Luke, Andrew and John, I've been listening since the radio day, although I missed a whole bunch of 2016, so I need to go back and listen to that year. I was busy falling in love with my third husband at the time. I like your style, Nance. Game recognized game.
- [38:57]
Andrew Walsh
What was husband number two doing around that time? Just joking, Nancy.
- [39:01]
Luke Burbank
This community is so important. That's me backing away from Andrew.
- [39:09]
Andrew Walsh
Wait, can I get a ride? Backing away from my own joke.
- [39:15]
Luke Burbank
Let's see. This community is so important to me, Luke. I'm the same age as your parents, and I often amaze younger people when I know things about current culture that I apparently shouldn't know because I am older. They say, how did you know that? And I say, I learned it from my podcast. They never asked me what my podcast is.
- [39:32]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, they should.
- [39:33]
Luke Burbank
So I am tickled that I impressed them with my knowledge. I do love that too, Nancy. Like, for me, it's because I'm so terminally online with like TikTok and stuff that if, you know, actually when I was jogging last weekend, right before I threw up, was jogging with. With Alexander, who is Becca's nephew. And he, you know, he's a. He's a, I think a freshman in high school, so he's aware of the lingo and I was able to deploy the fact that I'm very unk and chopped and. And he was obviously impressed that I was using that terminology. I like being able to show the kids that I'm still very much have my finger on the pulse of what's going on. The tens goodness, compassion and wisdom show me that there truly are lots of good people out there and that gives me hope and comfort in these dark times. Are you sensing a theme this year, Andrew, with the dazzling toner messages? A lot of folks looking for some positivity in this world and I totally get that. I can't believe you've been doing this show for, is it 18 years? I know it's ridiculous to think you will do it forever, but I will be listening as long as you do. Love you all. That's from Nancy in Tacoma. Nancy, thank you so much. Well, we're doing it for the foreseeable future, so you're stuck with us, you and that third husband of yours who's probably hearing this right now in the car and is going, what on earth is this? And why? Why are we donating to it?
- [40:56]
Andrew Walsh
I'm number three.
- [40:59]
Luke Burbank
This is also a weird way for him to learn that fact.
- [41:03]
Andrew Walsh
So I wanted to provide a little extra service to Nancy because Nancy missed out on a lot of 2016 shows because she was falling head over heels. And so I was gonna look up what did we do on this date in 2016?
- [41:17]
Luke Burbank
Now this day in TBTL history, that should be a segment.
- [41:20]
Andrew Walsh
I know. And then we brought it back a little bit when we were on American Public Media because I had extra time on my hands. I'd be happy to do that again. Now, this date in 2016 doesn't actually exist because there was a Friday, February 26th show and there a Monday, February 29th show, but the 27th actually fell on the weekend. Leap day. William just fell on the weekend.
- [41:42]
Luke Burbank
No, but if there's 29 days in February.
- [41:44]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, yeah, I'm sorry. I talked right past that. Sorry about that. Yeah. So 2016 leap year. And I will read to you both descriptions. First of all, the first one is hilarious because we had just been talking about that missing episode about me being super anxious about moving to Los Angeles. Well, here in 2016 on February 26th, show description. Andrew is suddenly very stressed about his big move back to Seattle. Luke is also stressed out, but for a much more complicated reason. Ooh, I wonder what that is. They discuss their anxieties in great detail, plus the long awaited return of email frenzy and music for your weekend. So again, we're working for apm. We're bringing back these segments because I like the idea of bringing segments back. Then on Monday the 29th. Oh, notice Luke. That's a leap year. TBTL's 2016 Oscar analysis mostly focus focuses on Andrew's weekend of ripping up old poetry notebooks. I remember that very well. Big day in my personal history. No regurch there. He and Luke also discussed Chris Rock's performance. So this must have been Chris Rock hosting the Oscars.
- [42:48]
Luke Burbank
Hosting the Oscars.
- [42:49]
Andrew Walsh
And this was the year that I saw him working out his material ahead of time because he was a surprise guest at the Chappelle show that I went to before we all knew that he was was bigoted.
- [43:02]
Luke Burbank
He and Luke also discussed not funny anymore. I watched the latest Chappelle special It was so sad. I mean, the anti trans stuff is. Is. Is dumb and annoying, but also just. I didn't think the comedy was very funny, honestly.
- [43:14]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. He and Lu discussed Chris Rock's performance and whether or not the broadcast should still include musical numbers. Plus everything you ever wanted to know about Leap Day and Ja Rule, but we're afraid to ask. So that's. You can go back. You wait.
- [43:29]
Luke Burbank
Well, that's my Leap Day William impression.
- [43:35]
Andrew Walsh
I know.
- [43:36]
Luke Burbank
Yeah. Well, Nancy.
- [43:37]
Andrew Walsh
No, it isn't. Oprah.
- [43:41]
Luke Burbank
You don't have to go back and listen to 2016. We just caught you up on it. So, Nancy, thank you so much for. For supporting the show. We really do appreciate it. Maestro, on your mark. On your mark.
- [43:51]
Andrew Walsh
Get set, get set now. Ready, ready, ready. Go.
- [43:55]
Luke Burbank
Everybody Rattle dazzle. It is our friend, the one, the only, Cheryl Chercheck. AKA Cherylin Corvallis.
- [44:06]
Andrew Walsh
Cherilyn Corvallis. Can you change your name legally to Cheryl in Corvallis? Because that's how we all know you.
- [44:12]
Luke Burbank
Your Cheryl's new legal name is Cheryl in Corvallis.
- [44:15]
Andrew Walsh
Corvallis, Corvallis.
- [44:17]
Luke Burbank
Cheryl says. Greetings all. As I write this, the world feels overwhelming and there's so much to be done to fight back against the. The dark. I'm focusing on acts of service which I'd like to share locally. I've been volunteering at the South Corvallis Food Bank. If you have the means, I encourage you to donate food, time, money, or all three to a food bank in your own area. Ideally, please check that. Like our South Corvallis Food bank, they are inclusive and do not place conditions on receiving assistance. Food is a basic human right. I would agree with that, Cheryl. Globally. I'll be traveling to rural Guatemala this April with a non profit called Nuevas Sonrisas. That's New Smiles, which for over a decade has been providing yearly preventive dental care and hygiene education to approximately 4,000 children and their families. These visits make such a huge difference in students lives. If you feel inclined to learn more or donate to support this work, please visit nuevassonrisas.org that's n u e v a s Nueva US Sonrisa's is s o n r I s a s.org
- [45:28]
Andrew Walsh
Can I jump in here for one second, Luke? Cause I think this is a good time to bring something up that I've been meaning to mention that I think you and I have both been meaning to mention, which is these dazzling donor messages, first of all have been very dazzling and I appreciate it. And there's Also, a lot of people who are either shouting out organizations like this or shouting out their own businesses and are giving some sort of, like, details about how people can get involved or get in touch or something. And it's a lot of information. If there's something. Something that you remember hearing on the show but you can't go back and figure out. What was that email address again? What was that web address again? You can write to John. John actually wrote to us offering the Service. Write to johnbtl.net, that's jonbtl.net and John is happy to go through and hook you up with any of these services that you hear about during this segment.
- [46:15]
Luke Burbank
Yes. Very good reminder. Thanks for doing it. And thanks, John, also for handling all of that. That stuff. Finally, Cheryl says, I'd like to encourage you all to give yourselves grace and allow yourselves to find and savor small moments of joy. Joy in the face of hatred and oppression is an act of resistance, too. Remember, nolite te bastardes carborundorum.
- [46:40]
Andrew Walsh
Don't let the bastards grind you down.
- [46:43]
Luke Burbank
Oh, that's what that is.
- [46:44]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, I think it's like. I think it's, like, fake.
- [46:46]
Luke Burbank
I got the bastards part.
- [46:48]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah,
- [46:50]
Luke Burbank
I didn't know what carbondarum.
- [46:53]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, I thought that's the part that meant bastards. No, just kidding. That is from. I can't remember what book it is, but some author wrote that in their book, and it's sort of like a fake Latin phrase that means don't let the bastards grind you down.
- [47:05]
Luke Burbank
I like. I mean, and again, I like the message from Cheryl as well, which is just that joy in the face of hatred is an act of resistance. Because, of course, this is something that we've talked about a lot on the show and that everybody struggles with right now, which is when the world is such a dark place and this country is such a dark place for so many people, then what is our relationship with joy supposed to look like? Because are we being somehow not allies, let's say, when we're taking joy in things or, you know, when I'm taking joy and getting kicked out of the Kaufman center or whatever is going on. But I do think that, as Cheryl is saying, that we have to continue to find joy where we can, and that because we're feeling joyful about something, it doesn't mean that we're not, you know, thinking about or caring for our, you know, our fellow people in this country who are really going through it. So that's a nice reminder from Cheryl. You know, while I've been here in Kansas. I did a little hit with our friend Lindy west for her social media feed, talking Andrew about van magnets because she is putting some. She's got this new book out, Adult Braces, and she's doing some kind of cross country tour, but she's. She's gonna. She ordered these magnets to put on the side of her rental van that she's driving around in. And I was, I told her about the whole thing with Corvallis and how,
- [48:17]
Andrew Walsh
you know, we think the wind blew those off of the doors, Right?
- [48:21]
Luke Burbank
Yes. But at first we thought they were stolen Corvallis, and later we figured out that it probably. It was more likely that it was the wind.
- [48:28]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. And I kind of. I kind of felt bad. We. We joked around about that a lot. And then I think Cheryl started to be like, you know, you're talking about, about my community here. We're not thieves. Which I understand that, but it was so strange to see those things just missing from our van. But my question for you is, like, you bought those with, like, they were sold with that purpose in mind, right? Like, in other words, is Lindy's situation. Is she buying them from someplace that they're going to be more secure because they're made to be put on a moving vehicle or were ours made to be on a moving vehicle as well? We just got ripped off. Off.
- [49:03]
Luke Burbank
I have this vague memory, you know, I'm. I don't know if this is like, you know, a Mandela effect or what, but I feel like maybe the person at the FAST signs said something like, you know, if you go really large with them, that there might be some surface area issues. I can't remember. I feel like there was maybe. Maybe it was even my dad or something. I feel like there was a vague warning that I ignored, which is usually more my move. But. Yeah, I don't know if. Yeah. If they sold us. Well, that's what I told Lindy was make sure that the, the magnets are not too large, because I think that could add to the problem. But she's already ordered all of this stuff, so it is. It is going to be what it is. But all that is to say, you know, of course I remember our time in. And it was actually fun to get to tell Lindy about how. What we did think about. Forget the signage. Just what a funny, weird thon that was when we just drove to people's houses.
- [49:56]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah.
- [49:57]
Luke Burbank
Did the podcast because it was the pandemic. We did the podcast from in front of their house. And then we delivered. I like a memory stick with the episode on it.
- [50:07]
Andrew Walsh
The USB drive.
- [50:08]
Luke Burbank
Yeah, a USB thumb drive that we found in the parking lot. Like, what a fun, weird thing. I even found a picture of the van with the magnets on it. Andrew, have you ever seen that picture?
- [50:18]
Andrew Walsh
No. I'd like to see it, actually.
- [50:20]
Luke Burbank
I'll send it to.
- [50:21]
Andrew Walsh
You know that one. One of my favorite photos of me ever. It was not from that Thawne. I'm thinking about it because it just came up on my little skylight frame the other day, and I was in my. It's very rare. I mean, it is extraordinarily rare for me to stand there or sit there and admire a photo of me, but I was literally doing that the other day, and it was a photo that you took of me standing on a ridge in the outback. Do you remember that photo? You came up on your phone one day and you sent it to me. You're like, oh, you know, I think your phone was just serving you memories or whatever, and you sent it to me. I'm like, this is good. I put it on the frame. I actually. And you know me, I kind of hate photos of myself. I don't like that. But it's like, I look very. Oh, this photo. You just. Luke just sent me the photo of the van. This is great. Podcast delivery. Take you back. I totally forgot. That's right. The van was white. I was picturing a white sign. But no, it's a yellow sign that says podcast delivery. And looking at this again, and maybe we've already discussed this. I understand why this got ripped off in the wind. It's because the van has this ridge through the middle of it that is maybe, I don't know, what, an inch deep or an inch and a half deep or something like that. And so that probably was a perfect little place for the wind to sort of like, get in that pocket and rip it off.
- [51:35]
Luke Burbank
I think if. Yeah, if it had been more. If the surface of the door had just been one piece of material, I think we would still have our signs to the right.
- [51:44]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. This is a show pick. This is great.
- [51:47]
Luke Burbank
Anyway, thank you, Cheryl, for supporting the show. You're the best, and we really do appreciate you.
- [51:57]
Andrew Walsh
Hello, and welcome to Top Secret Story.
- [52:00]
Luke Burbank
This seems like something that might be on your radar, Andrew, because of your spotless podcast that you host with Hannah Brooks Olson about cleaning.
- [52:08]
Andrew Walsh
But did you see or my advertising podcast? I thought this.
- [52:11]
Luke Burbank
Well, there you go. Exactly. Of everything that you. That you. That you treasure in this world content wise. And of course, Andrew. It's another Alexandra Petri Petri article who we love. Mr. Clark Clean, the bald, broad shouldered cleaning mascot, retires after 68 years. Mr. Clean, the bald, strapping mascot of the household cleaning products bearing his name, announced his retirement on a social media post. In the post, shared last week on the Brand's Instagram account, Mr. Clean is standing behind a lectern wearing sunglasses and a Hawaiian shirt, his signature all white outfit seemingly a thing of the past. A Chiron reading. Breaking news. Mr. Clean announces retirement stretches across the video. Now, I have to say, Mr. Clean is one of those. I guess we're calling it a mascot that is, you know, pretty iconic. And like, it's pretty, It's. It seems that in this day and age, it's difficult to create something that has the level of brand awareness that like, Mr. Clean does just from all the years of it being a thing. I'm really shocked that they're walking away from it.
- [53:23]
Andrew Walsh
They're not.
- [53:24]
Luke Burbank
They're not.
- [53:25]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. Not to be like a total party pooper on this, but to be honest with you, and I feel like I've been a little bit tough on Alexander Petrie in the past, too, but, like, this shouldn't be written in the New York Times or it shouldn't be written in this manner in the New York Times. Like, don't, don't play along so much. Like, it's fine to maybe cover it as, like, in a marketing movie move, you know, Mr. Clean says it's retiring its mascot. Don't pretend like it's actually happening. They did this to Mr. Peanut, like, what? Five years ago, there was a whole. Mr. Peanut died and they quote, unquote, killed him off. And then he came back right away. They did it with the most interesting man in the world, and now he's back as well. Like, brands are doing this all the time. They're doing this fake thing and then also, like, really personifying it even more by not saying, like, hey, listen, you know, we're just kind of changing up our branding a little bit. They're making it seem like Mr. Oh. Or even this is a little bit. Even like Snoop Dogg, who's a real person. Mr. Clean is not allegedly. But he is. He's named after a cartoon dog in a certain way, I think. But remember, it was kind of like, I'm giving up smoke. And we're all like, we know this is bullshit. And then it's kind of like, I'm getting a smokeless grill. Everybody's like, oh, we thought you were giving up smoking marijuana. No, we didn't. Like, no, we didn. Those of us who even take a half a second to think about these things, it is called marketing, and it's a ploy, and that's fine. They should do it. I do think that. And I'm fine talking about it on this show. It kind of bums me out when journalistic institutions like the New York Times sort of take it a bit at face value.
- [55:02]
Luke Burbank
Well, you know what's funny is because I take the New York Times at face value, believe it or not, Andrew, it's only now occurring to me in this conversation that, like, oh, oh, yeah, of course they're just gonna bring him back in some capacity. This is just to get attention. I thought. I really did take it. I took them at their word that they were. They had, you know, decided that, like, for whatever reason, this image was not moving enough cleaning products, and so they were gonna try to switch to something else. And then I had a bunch of questions which was like, well, first of all, the product's called Mr. Clean, so what are you gonna do with that? And also, like, you know, why would you get rid of this, you know, this thing that. That most people, if they, you know, if you show them a picture of, they know what that means. Again, that's the whole challeng. In this noisy environment, why would you ever walk away from that? And it's like, of course, because you're not walking away from it. You're just getting. You're just getting some earned media out of this stunt.
- [55:52]
Andrew Walsh
And then you get it again. Then you get it again when he comes back. Now, what I'm searching for here on the fly, and I just sent you kind of a janky link to a Facebook video. Facebook videos are terrible to try to play on podcasts because they mute themselves as soon as you hit play for some reason. But this is not the original Mr. Clean commercial. I think the original Mr. Clean commercials were a cartoon depiction. But early on, this one claims to be from 1964. They started using kind of live action. They used an actor and made these live action Mr. Clean commercials that are terrifying. Are you familiar with these things? And I don't know.
- [56:27]
Luke Burbank
I am a little bit.
- [56:28]
Andrew Walsh
You got the link I just sent you? Okay, so. But this one, and I'm going to hit play on this, and hopefully it'll work. But there's like a little girl out in the yard. You know, it's a black and white kind of grainy at this point. Video here, and she's playing with a dollhouse out in the backyard, it looks like. And then this. They cast Mr. Clean as this huge, imposing bald man, but he's so tall, and he comes up to her like a gosh darn creep. Let me see if I can get the audio going here. Hello there.
- [56:57]
Natalie
How's cleaning? It's the floors. They take so darn long to clean.
- [57:02]
Luke Burbank
You Mr. Clean can get the job done faster. Why? It's new. Improved.
- [57:07]
Natalie
What's improve?
- [57:08]
Luke Burbank
Me better than before.
- [57:11]
Andrew Walsh
It's not as scary as I remember. There's one where he approaches a woman who's, like, cleaning the floors in a hallway, and he's a little bit more. But it's always like. I believe in both of these commercials, the girl or woman is, like, on the ground. And this tall man kind of comes with an earring. Oh, that was kind of interesting in the article.
- [57:31]
Luke Burbank
Yeah, the nose ring.
- [57:32]
Andrew Walsh
The choice between nose ring or earrings. Earring.
- [57:35]
Luke Burbank
Yeah, the original. The whole story on this. This mascot was they wanted it to be. They decided for some reason that it was gonna be a guy who was bald and was almost kind of like, had the vibe of a magician of sorts, because the product was supposed to work sort of like magic and I guess. So they had somebody, you know, draw up these different versions of this character, Mr. Clean. And in one, he had an earring, and the other had a nose ring, which seems pretty wild for the, like, whatever, 50s or something. But they ended up going with the earring one. But. But yeah, like, the. The sort of, like, live action. Mr. Clean showing up in your house unannounced is pretty terrifying.
- [58:16]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. This strange man who's towering over you while you're on the ground.
- [58:21]
Luke Burbank
We really did have. There was a period in this country where we were really into bald guys. Between Kojak and Mr. Clean, those are the only two examples I could think of.
- [58:31]
Andrew Walsh
Well, who loves you, baby? Is that.
- [58:32]
Luke Burbank
Yeah.
- [58:33]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, wait. Oh, that is Kojak.
- [58:35]
Luke Burbank
That's code.
- [58:36]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, that's right. I. I was thinking he was a third bald. Here I go once again with the email.
- [58:41]
Luke Burbank
Every week, I hope that it's from a female. Oh, man.
- [58:45]
Andrew Walsh
It's not from a female.
- [58:48]
Luke Burbank
All right, we've got this voicemail that you've spent the week whittling away because it sounds like it's very interesting, but it was also fairly meandering.
- [58:59]
Andrew Walsh
It was.
- [58:59]
Luke Burbank
So you've un. Meandered it a little bit.
- [59:02]
Andrew Walsh
Listener Natalie wanted to tell the story. Actually, these two related stories on the voicemail line the voicemail line has a three minute limit. And so she ended up leaving three voicemails and just is, I know, a
- [59:14]
Luke Burbank
voicemail that's at its limit.
- [59:16]
Andrew Walsh
And she's cracking up at how meandery this is. She's laughing at herself and will keep saying, I know you're never gonna play this, but anyway, I am going to play it because I found these stories to be fascinating and right up my alley. And so I also wanted to give Natalie a little bit of space to meander here. So this is a long one, Luke. If you need me to pause at any point, I will take it away. Natalie in New Orleans.
- [59:38]
Natalie
Hey, this is for Andrew. This is Natalie in New Orleans. I'm a bit distressed and like the number one person that I thought of that I needed to report this to. Two incidents, not one, two incident of people using their knowledge of me as an excuse to their acquaintance with me. Their. Their friendship, not friendship anymore. To cut in line. So the first incident was. It was at a brunch thing. It was, it was like a dance and brunch, really cute thing. And this girl that I haven't seen in a long time says like, oh, hey. And you know, we hug and stuff. We're in line for the bar and the food stand, okay, during a, a break and dancing. And there's like a big long line of people and they have like really yummy like house made Bloody Mary. And you know, probably like there's. There's probably like 30 people in line just. And. And you know, there's limited quantity on the, on those, on those hand blended Bloody Marys. And. And you've got to know that at least one in every three people at a minimum hat is just praying that they make it up in time for the last bit, the last drop of that blood and Uranus, you know, and this girl whom I would have called a friend, but now, I don't know, she walks up to me. I'm about midway through the line. There's probably at least 10 or 15 people behind me. And she's like, oh, hey, I haven't seen you in so long. She gives me a hug and she just starts chatting. And like, the more she's chatting and the line's moving, the more anxious I'm getting because I'm like, are you really just gonna like cut in front of all of these people and just keep talking to me? Because then it looks like I, I condoned this because I can't just like be like, be gone Satan behind me.
- [61:31]
Luke Burbank
Now Andrew can You pause it real quick.
- [61:32]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah.
- [61:33]
Luke Burbank
This is literally the plot of a curb your Enthusiasm episode. Do you remember that?
- [61:37]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, no, I didn't know that.
- [61:39]
Luke Burbank
This literally happens on curb where somebody tries to use. I think it's Larry tries to. You. I think he's in the line and someone's trying to use talking to him as an excuse to get to where he is in the line. Or maybe it's vice versa.
- [61:52]
Andrew Walsh
I could see him being upset. My guess would be, if I to bet on it, that he's the one who's upset because somebody's using him the way Natalie is being used. Yeah, no, I didn't remember that. But it sounds just like a curb.
- [62:05]
Luke Burbank
Yes.
- [62:06]
Natalie
Because I can't just like be like be gone. Satan behind me, literally. Oh my God. So upset.
- [62:14]
Luke Burbank
And.
- [62:14]
Natalie
And she totally did it. And worst thing possible happened. She. I got the next to last Bloody Mary and she's like, that was good, I'm gonna get one too. And she got the last one.
- [62:27]
Luke Burbank
No way.
- [62:28]
Natalie
I was absolutely floored that she. And that is so shady. Okay. So then I was like, all right, now I know that about you. Noted. And then. And then the next thing happened. Like just last night, like this. I was in line for this concert and it was like a really special concert of Eastern European singers visiting from. Honestly, too much detail. Okay. There were probably, probably 50, 60.
- [62:55]
Luke Burbank
Was it the mysterious voices of Bulgaria?
- [63:01]
Andrew Walsh
Did it involve contra dance?
- [63:02]
Natalie
I mean, a lot of people, many dozens of people in line, wrapping around the corner. Many of us had pre ordered tickets, had paid in advance. But for some reason this venue didn't have things. In order to be able to like form two lines to let people that had prepaid and like, seating's limited. Okay. And I already knew that because it's happened to me once before. It's a situation where like if you don't get in the door. And I was there like 15 minutes beforehand. So I thought that was a reason. I was like, okay, I learned my lesson last time. I'm going to get there kind of early and you know, so I can be sure to get a seat. As it was, there was already a line around the block. I was already getting anxious about, like, am I going to get a seat? Is it going to happen like it did last time, even though I prepaid and everything. And then in what do you know these people from a singing group that I'm in waltz up and they're like, oh, hey. And. And like I'm like halfway through the. But there's like Dozens of people behind me. Okay. And they're like, oh, hey, good to see you. You know, I mean, one of them doesn't even know my name. Like we're not even on first name basis. Okay. Or last name basis. I don't know why I said that.
- [64:14]
Luke Burbank
And what about the middle name?
- [64:15]
Andrew Walsh
Middle name?
- [64:16]
Luke Burbank
Yes.
- [64:16]
Natalie
Long story level. They well said. They just hang out in line and at one point they kind of acknowledge they're like, I guess we're just cheating. And I was like, yeah, you are. But they just stick with me. And I was so upset. I'm actually like tight in my chest just thinking about all the people behind me who were like those enoughers, you know? And that girl, she just left it. Like they. I'm. I'm implicit in this crime, you know, because I didn't send them away way. So we got in there and sure enough, once again, like we got some of the very last seats. Like there were a few handful of seats left. Yeah, I'll just finish my sentence. I know you can't use this, but as you can see, I was very upset about both the Bloody Mary line cutting incident and the concert line cutting incident. Similar situations, both of them where people just waltzed and used me. Me to get in front of them. And then, and then they got the. Like, it was worse. They got the last of the things and that's just. I. I was so upset and. But like I felt like a. Such a. I don't know, I just. I just was really, really thinking of you in those moments and so I just wanted to share that. Thanks.
- [65:38]
Andrew Walsh
I'm glad people think of us in these moments. There is some you in these moments because I.
- [65:44]
Luke Burbank
Doing the line cutting.
- [65:45]
Andrew Walsh
This feels like more like a Luke voicemail. Yeah, no, this. I. I don't even. We could talk about this for an hour or we could just say amen, sister, because I feel you. I feel you on this so much. I can't remember the last time somebody used me in this way. But I would be freaking out exactly the way Natalie is. Not freaking out enough to actually stop it, but freaking out enough internally just to be very deeply, deeply uncomfortable and not able to let it go.
- [66:15]
Luke Burbank
Well, I mean, it's so unfair to the Natalie in this situation because she has no good options because what is she going to do? Say like, you know, as she said, get behind me, Satan, send the people to the back of the line and make a whole thing which is going to be super uncomfortable for her or go along with this cheating, this obvious cheating and the fact that in both cases, the people that were doing the line cutting were getting the last of whatever the thing was. Also, what I've really learned from this is Natalie is living her best life in New Orleans.
- [66:42]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, right. She's thinking that too.
- [66:44]
Luke Burbank
She's going to dance break brunches. I've never even heard of a dance brunch.
- [66:47]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, me neither.
- [66:48]
Luke Burbank
She's going to see the Mysterious Voices of Bulgaria, which continue to sell out nola, like, I love that. I love that.
- [66:55]
Andrew Walsh
Were you Googling that around or do you know this is a phenomenon sweeping the nation?
- [67:00]
Luke Burbank
No, I was just joking because haven't we talked about this before that, like, I feel like it was really big in the world of public radio when you and I came up between the, like you had to the bailiffleck and the fleck tones. And then you had this like Eastern European choir called the Mysterious Voices of Bulgaria.
- [67:16]
Andrew Walsh
Oh, I don't remember this reference.
- [67:18]
Luke Burbank
Oh, I was really into them, actually. It's really good music. It's really unique. But it just. If I think of Eastern European music for some reason, that's what sort of comes to mind for me. But no, I mean, Natalie is just fully engaged with life and maybe should be less engaged with life because this seems to be a real recurring problem. Yeah, this won't happen if you stay home. That's what I'm saying.
- [67:40]
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, exactly.
- [67:41]
Luke Burbank
Stay in your bowling, cutting lines at your Andrew's dark games.
- [67:44]
Andrew Walsh
That's right. That's right. Nobody's drinking my milkshake over here. But I really, I also just really enjoyed that storytelling. It was funny how Tom and of course I edited it, but several times throughout, Natalie kept saying, I know you're not going to use this. And I was like, oh, you couldn't be more.
- [68:00]
Luke Burbank
That's great content. Thank you, Natalie. Call us anytime.
- [68:03]
Andrew Walsh
Absolutely. Absolutely. You know the number.
- [68:05]
Luke Burbank
And by the way, for the rest of you too, I don't mean to
- [68:07]
Andrew Walsh
make work for you, Andrew, because I
- [68:08]
Luke Burbank
know you do a lot of maintaining of the voicemail line, but it's 206-414-TBTL 206414 8285. You may have seen that on some magnetic signs on the side of the road somewhere too, but yeah, give us a call and tell us how your life is going. We love to hear that.
- [68:24]
Andrew Walsh
Absolutely.
- [68:25]
Luke Burbank
All right, my friends, that is going to bring us to the end of today's episode and in fact, our broadcast week. So that does it. We're going to slide down that old dinosaur. But we are going to be back here on Monday with more imaginary radio. I will be back at the Madrona Hill studio where I belong. And we'll have a big show for you on Monday. So please do tune in for that. In the meantime, have a great Friday. Have a great weekend, everybody. Stay safe. Don't cut in line. Don't get the last Bloody Mary when it wasn't yours to take. And please remember, no mountain too tall.
- [68:57]
Andrew Walsh
And good luck to all. Power out.