#4733 The Perfectly Worst Person

Summary

TBTL #4733 – The Perfectly Worst Person

Date: May 22, 2026
Hosts: Luke Burbank & Andrew Walsh

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Episode Overview

In this Friday episode, Luke and Andrew kick off with comedy and end with a meditation on the end of an era. The show weaves nostalgia, pop culture, and a glimpse behind the scenes of late-night TV, particularly the final Colbert Late Show and its broader cultural meaning. Along the way, listeners are treated to personal stories about bad jobs, changing media, infamous commercial jingles, and the deep, oddly personal psychological roots of internet marketplace ghosting.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Opening Shenanigans and 90s Alternative Nostalgia (00:00–10:32)

• Andrew jokingly channels a TikTok tough guy for anti-bully messaging and kicks off with a raucous Friday mood.
• Luke is in Chicago, relishing an upgraded hotel room and reminiscing about hearing Marcy Playground's "Sex and Candy" during the Suenos Festival soundchecks.
• The pair wax nostalgic about 90s alt-radio hits ("Sex and Candy", "The Way" by Fastball, Black Crowes), linking them to specific, sometimes "crappy" jobs, e.g., Andrew’s days at an Ohio fiberglass factory.
  • Quote (05:17, Andrew): “I did not like it. Now I don’t even know how I would feel about it, but at the time, I remember not liking it, but also not being able to escape it... maybe because it reminds me of...grinding fiberglass.”
• Andrew recounts revisiting his old workplace and the discovery that a now-defunct SeaWorld used to be in rural Aurora, Ohio, sparking reflections on the oddity of keeping sea animals in landlocked industrial zones and a shared sense of "this is a place that sucks life out of beings" (08:38).

2. The End of the Colbert Late Show: Nostalgia and Media Change (13:25–44:05)

Final Colbert Episode Recap (13:25–38:18)

• Luke & Andrew break down the format and production of Colbert’s final show, including surreal narrative bits involving celebrities and a "tear in the fabric of the universe."
• Paul McCartney’s full-circle guest appearance in the Ed Sullivan Theatre, Beatles references, and the show’s final musical number (“You Say Goodbye, I Say Hello”) are highlighted as poignant moments.
  • Quote (16:59, Luke): “It did have a certain kind of bookend effect, you know.”
  • When Colbert and McCartney “turn off the lights,” the show ends with the Ed Sullivan Theater as a snow globe, evoking both "Citizen Kane" and "The Bob Newhart Show" (32:59).
• They note Colbert’s choice to end not with anger or critique, but with joy, gratitude, and a touch of magical absurdism befitting his career.
  • Quote (44:05, Luke): “Sometimes maybe feeling joyful and happiness is a form of dissent...to like him sitting there singing with Elvis Costello...he was really joyful. And I liked that too.”

Broader Media Landscape & Fragmentation (22:58–33:37)

• The hosts reflect on the end of monoculture in American media, comparing the phenomenon of late-night water cooler moments to today’s fragmented, algorithm-driven content ecosystem.
  • Quote (25:32, Luke): “The star-making system, the machinery of content and how we used to watch it and who used to get to make it has been completely busted open. And the upside of that is that I see this kid on TikTok who is making me laugh this week.”
  • Andrew: “All the little bubbles are getting smaller and smaller, bubbling up like a glass of champagne.” (31:11)

Reflections and Regrets

• Andrew wishes Colbert would have “used the sword” and spoken some “truth to power,” voicing a yearning for brave media in perilous times, but respects the choice for optimism: "I'm glad he got to say goodbye the way he wanted to" (44:05).
• Luke defends Colbert’s joy-focused finale as a valid—and at times radical—response to difficult times.

3. Wait, Wait...Don’t Tell Me’s Bill Kurtis: Another Swan Song (44:39–48:36)

• Brief but emotional stories around Bill Kurtis’ final night as "Wait, Wait...Don’t Tell Me" announcer.
  • Luke describes the theater pausing as Bill, a broadcasting legend, wells up at his final "from the Studebaker Theater, I'm Bill Kurtis." (45:25)
• They joke about hot takes and posting for clicks in the new fractured media landscape.

4. Dazzling Donors & Listener Messages (49:07–60:15)

• Two donor messages are spotlighted with friendly ribbing:
  • Robert Rowe recycles an essay (and story about recycling essays).
  • Jen Joyce (“Uber Jen”), markets her new fractional marketing leadership practice and shares creative, crafted ventures (Uber Kittens, maker meetups, etc). (57:13)
• Banter about Taco Time and hot takes on recurring menu choices.

5. Cars for Kids (60:29–64:42)

• California pulls the infamous 1-877-CARS-FOR-KIDS ads after finding funds did not benefit local kids, but primarily supported Jewish heritage programming on the East Coast.
  • Both hosts experience conflicted nostalgia for the “bad radio jingle” era versus the often-misleading national ad campaign.
  • Quote (62:11, Luke): “Is it a good thing that there are fewer people that are going to have to hear the Cars for Kids ad, or is there something that's beautifully terrible about it?”

6. Confessions of a Facebook Marketplace Ghoster (64:42–72:36)

• Listener Catherine shares a candid, insightful email about why people ghost sellers on social marketplaces (dopamine hits, fantasy, avoidance).
  • Quote (69:09, Catherine): “I'm absolutely the person ... reinventing my entire life around a used lawnmower for the home I just purchased... But in that moment when I click send message... I fully believe I'm buying it... and then... I'm no longer in my become the kind of person who owns a used croquet set era. So I quietly disappear into the night."
• Both hosts relate to this "shameful" online behavior and its parallels with real life avoidance and procrastination.

7. Hacky Sacks, Butt Plugs, and Closing Banter (72:36–79:52)

• Hacky sack nostalgia resurfaces as Andrew’s dog, Lucy, gets a hacky sack as swag from a university event, paralleling a recent NYT trend piece.
• “Awkward story” segment teases, with reference to a listener’s dog finding a butt plug, and a silly discussion about Lucy’s newfound hacky skills.

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• Nostalgia for 90s radio jobs:
  “Maybe that's why I don't like it that much. Maybe because it reminds me of...grinding fiberglass.”
  — Andrew Walsh (05:17)

• On monoculture:
  “I miss all of us kind of knowing about the same thing...We're never going to all be watching the same content again other than maybe the Super Bowl.”
  — Luke Burbank (25:32)

• On Colbert's finale:
  “The entire staff of the show floods through the aisles up onto stage, and...there's...probably takes 3, 400 people to put this show on. And...they're all on stage just dancing...It’s just a joyous, kind of beautiful thing.” (36:01)

• On using the platform for critique (Andrew's hope):
  “You would love to see him...just one absolutely killer thing to say or do, that undermines what is going on and highlights what is going on.”
  — Andrew Walsh (41:03)

• On internet marketplace ghosting (listener email):
  “Then the seller replies eight minutes later and suddenly...I'm no longer in my become the kind of person who owns a used croquet set era. So I quietly disappear into the night.”
  — Catherine (69:09)

• On the decline of shared experiences:
  “We're one of the tiniest of the bubbles... You just don't...bump into someone on the street that you'll be able to say, ‘Did you catch that TBTL the other day?’”
  — Luke Burbank (31:11)

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Episode Timeline

• 00:00–10:32: Silly banter, Friday energy, 90s alt-rock, bad jobs, and industrial nostalgia.
• 10:32–13:25: SeaWorld in Ohio, the Shamu/Bamu/Namu name mix-up, and the sadness of caged whales.
• 13:25–44:05: Deep dive on Colbert’s last Late Show, media fragmentation, nostalgia for unified cultural moments, late-night host legacies, and the symbolic nature of these changing times.
• 44:05–48:36: Bill Kurtis’s last night at Wait, Wait...Don’t Tell Me; more on saying goodbye.
• 49:03–60:15: Dazzling Donors section, Taco Time hot-take talk, and shoutouts.
• 60:29–64:42: “Cars for Kids” scandal, the power and peril of catchy jingles.
• 64:42–72:36: Marketplace email confession—psychology of ghosting; hosts respond and relate.
• 72:36–end: Hacky sack is back (for dogs and college kids), closing thoughts, Memorial Day plans, lawn-cutting anxieties, and why you should only have one Twisted Tea after mowing.

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Tone & Language

Throughout, the episode is marked by the duo’s classic mix of irreverent, self-deprecating humor; rambling but insightful cultural critique; and genuine warmth for each other, their listeners, and the crumbling-but-still-comforting landscape of legacy media. Their approach is relaxed, nostalgic, and, as always, just a little bit silly.

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For New Listeners

This episode offers a vivid window into TBTL’s “goofing through the world" style, especially for those wrestling with nostalgia, grappling with cultural change, or just wanting to hear smart, silly friends process the end of something meaningful.

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Memorable Moments

• “Sometimes maybe feeling joyful and happiness is a form of dissent…” — Luke (44:05)
• Paul McCartney closing the Ed Sullivan Theater, staff dancing (36:01)
• Listener Catherine’s “Marketplace Confessions” (69:09)
• Hacky sack is officially "backy sack," at least according to Lucy and Seattle campus swag (75:16)
• Bill Kurtis’s emotional goodbye on Wait Wait (45:25)
• The recursive “recycling the essay” dazzling donor (51:17)
• Ongoing love/hate relationship with “Cars for Kids” jingle (62:11)

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For Further Listening

• Skip past the intros, ads, and outro songs to get straight to the content, which begins around 00:33 and continues with few interruptions until episode close.
• For the Colbert Late Show reflections: 13:25–44:05
• For the Marketplace confession: 64:42–72:36
• For dazzling donor fun & pop culture talk: 49:07–60:15

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Power out!

Transcript

[Andrew Walsh]

Send this video to a bully. Hey, if you've been bullying my friend, here's a little fun fact you might immediately want to stop. Yes, I punch metal for fun and I do not give an absolute damn. I might be the baddest mother fluffer on this entire planet. I even have scars on my pinky. TBTM Guess what day it is. Guess what day it is.

[Luke Burbank]

It's Friday, Friday. Gonna get down on Friday.

[Andrew Walsh]

Everybody's looking forward to the weekend. Did you ever run into a musical group, works out of Kansas City, calls themselves Four Jacks in a Jill? They've been at a Ramadan there for about 18 months. If you're ever in Kansas City and

[Luke Burbank]

you wanna hear some good music, you

[Andrew Walsh]

might wanna drop by. I'm not trying to be disrespectful or anything, but I kinda feel like you're

[Luke Burbank]

winging this and it's going bad. Do I look like I know what a JPEG is? I just want a picture of a God dog. What kind of disco dancing nonsense is going on here? All right. Hello, good morning and welcome everyone to a Friday edition of TBT all, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's the voice of the youth of America.

[Luke Burbank]

My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host. Wait a minute. I read a tweet about a New Yorker article about you coming to you from Chicago, Illinois and the shores of Lake Michigan, looking out on the shed Aquarium, Soldier Field. Yesterday I was also coming to you from Chicago, Illinois, but I was oriented in a different direction because I was in a different hotel room in this hotel. But then being the all time nudge that I am, I nudged them and they moved us to a different room. And my, my goodness, I have never been more glad to be a nudge because we're on a corner unit. There's just views for days. We're able to hear the warm up act at the. I think it's the Suerte Music Festival here in Chicago in Grant Park. Somebody was warming up with. It's Suenos. The Suenos Music Festival. Somebody was warming up with a cover of Sex and Candy by Marcy Park. Is that the name of the band? Marcy Playground. Marcy McDonald's Playland. Anyway, it's quite a day here in Chicago and quite an episode coming your way. It's episode 4733 in a collector series.

[Andrew Walsh]

Now you have a friend in the diamond business.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm realizing how helpful it is to have Becca here in the room just fact checking me backstopping me, reminding me that the band is called Marcy Playground. They're not playing the festival. This is an important clarification. They're not part of the Suenos festival. That's more like a J. Balvin game, right? That's more like a Kali Ucha. But. But there's somebody was just for some reason playing that song. And we jogged past the stage when someone was sound checking. And now that lives in my head for the rest of time. Anyway, other important media stories today. Well, last night was the final episode of the Late show with Stephen Colbert. CBS says they had to cancel the show because of financial considerations. Well, we know you're good at lying. That remains a pretty questionable explanation for things. We'll talk about what all happened at the Ed Sullivan Theater last night. Speaking of lying, the Cars for Kids folks are in some trouble in California for not giving the money from the Cars to the right kids, according to California officials. So we may discuss that time permitting. We'll definitely say hello to this guy. Longest running cobra of the show. Maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. People always ask me like, what do you talk about five days a week? And I say rarely the news, because this is this guy's news gathering approach each morning. I don't read the newspaper. I don't watch news on television unless there's a cat involved. He's Andrew Walsh and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

[Andrew Walsh]

Who's that casting devious stares in my direction?

[Luke Burbank]

Mama Mercy Water Park.

[Andrew Walsh]

This surely is a dream that. By the way, that song, kind of a banger every. That reminds me of a very, very specific, not just time of my life, but sort of a very specific activity in my life. Now that that song is it just called Sex and Candy? Yes, sex, I believe it is by Marcy. Playground was ubiquitous on the radio during, I'm going to say the late 90s. And it kind of had crossover. Like a lot of us were just like locking it on whatever 107.9, the end type of al rock station at that time. But even the, even in that time frame, people were saying, I don't know, is it really alternative when these are the most popular songs of the day? But songs like that also would cross over to the like quasi classic rock or just rock and roll station. It was just getting constant.

[Luke Burbank]

You're talking about your fastball. The way.

[Andrew Walsh]

Is that a radio station around here?

[Luke Burbank]

Where were they going without ever knowing the way? That was another song that was a little bit like the Marcy Playground song where it was, like, considered altern, but then you'd start to hear it on the pop stations because it was undeniably catchy stuff.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. But then also, like, kind of. You could also mix that in with a little bit of Black Crows as well on, like, the rock and roll station. So anyway, my point is that Marcy Playground song, I did not like it. Now I don't even know how I would feel about it, but at the time, I remember not liking it, but also not being able to escape it. And very specifically, I feel like I heard it every day on my way to and on my way back from. From my job at the fiberglass factory. Maybe that's why I don't like it that much. Maybe because it reminds me of. Associated with grinding fiberglass and fiberglass out

[Luke Burbank]

of the inner parts of your ear years and months later.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes, exactly. I actually did not hate that job, but it was a very specific time. It was a very specific smell. It was a very clean factory I worked in, but you just had the smell of plastic and fiberglass and glue. And I would wear the same work clothes. I had dedicated work clothes to take to that job. And I had this plastic purple mug, like a thermal mug that I got it. I don't feel like we had a NPM's there, but it might have been an amp, a mug, or some sort of like a. On the go. You could fill it with your. We could fill it with your cola of choice. Or you could fill it as I usually did, probably with coffee or something. And I remember I always had that in my minivan on the way to. What was it called? Omega Protrusions. The fiberglass factory where I would listen to Marc.

[Luke Burbank]

How was the. Was the severance process painful, or did they not. Do they give you a general for that?

[Andrew Walsh]

I can say this. Honestly, I don't remember.

[Luke Burbank]

That really sounds like the name of an adjacent building in Severance, right next to Lumen. There's Omega Protrusions.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I believe it was Poltrusions. And this is where my Ohio accent probably doesn't help all that much either. Omega pultrusions. I went on a little memory lane the last time I was visiting my folks. And my folks live in the suburbs of Cleveland. And this is outside of Kent, where I went to college. So it's like an hour ride, maybe hour 15. I don't know. But when I'm visiting my folks, we don't have a lot to do. So sometimes we just go on drives and then get lunch or Whatever. So I had them drive me to Kent, Ohio, to relive some memories. And not really relive them. I didn't do shots with my parents at Ray's place. But anyway, the town of Kent had changed a lot. But then on the way home, I'm like, what if we just kept going straight down this road and we go down there to Aurora, Ohio, where I used to work at Omega. I just want to see the building again, how much it matches my memory. And my memory is just. Yeah, it was just a factory on this long stretch of road with factories. Like, it was just kind of a rural area. It's not like a. It's not like a specifically, like, congested factory area. Just spread out. Just generic, generic warehouses and factories. And as I was. And it did look, I guess as much as I remembered it, about the same. Just huge parking lots, big square buildings. But I think I was Googling it on my phone then too, because I was like, oh, yeah, this is Aurora, Ohio. And I look it up, and that is where. And this is one of the more depressing things I learned is there used to be a sea world there. And when you look at Aurora, Ohio, and you think they put a sea world here, you understand the movie Blackfish all the more. Do I have that right? Blackfish, Whatever that documentary was.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like, you're just like this. No, a goldfish shouldn't live in this part of Ohio. No offense to Ohio or the factory district of. Of Aurora, but, like, this is a place that sucks life out of beings. You don't bring sea creatures to this landlocked factory warehouse.

[Luke Burbank]

You don't thumb your nose at God.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exactly that way. Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

Because that's how you get Donald Trump.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, right, right.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a direct. And I can. From A to B. There's a direct line between putting a sea world into Aurora, Ohio, and God punishing us.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, my God. Do me a favor. If you have working Internet there. And by the way, our line sounds great today. So I'm guess you can just type in Aurora, Ohio, SeaWorld and you will see, I believe, photos of what it looks like now. Just like you can get a sense of what this area was like now.

[Luke Burbank]

What I'm seeing here is now I'm looking at. Okay, Geauga Lake. Now that's. Why is that coming up when I'm.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Wait a second. Hold on. Am I wrong? Was there a Geauga lake there? No. SeaWorld, Ohio.

[Luke Burbank]

No, no. Aurora's proposed a purchase of old SeaWorld includes Geaga Lake.

[Andrew Walsh]

So it's purch. It was.

[Luke Burbank]

It was. It was located. It looks like the SeaWorld was located on the shores of Geauga Lake.

[Andrew Walsh]

Doesn't that seem though like. Like the. These photos look like a scene out of. This is not. This is us, the last of us. I don't know what scenes out of this.

[Luke Burbank]

And by the way, I think I'm wrong about that. I think it was actually more inland. I think I'm just looking at some Geauga Lake stuff because. Because if it were actually on the shores of Geauga Lake, that would kind of be like. Well, it's near a larger body of water. This is less depressing. But I am guessing that they made sure to really snug it in really inland, really landlocked, really surrounded by impervious surfaces just to. Just to drive home the kind of unnatural nature of its location.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, and Geauga Lake is just a small. It's not like, you know, we're talking about the area of the Great Lakes, like Lake Erie or whatever. Geauga Lake is a small little lake that I don't even know what its origins are, to be completely honest with you. So it is depressing.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm looking at. This is. Looks like a Polaroid. Although maybe it's. It just might be stylized to look like a Polaroid, if that makes any sense. But it looks exactly like with the, you know, the little kind of white outline with the photograph in the middle and then what looks like sort of handwriting, it says Shamu SeaWorld Aurora, Ohio July 1978 Is it possible the Great Shamu was at the. Shamu was kind of the like OG so called killer whale. Oh, I didn't know about Bamu.

[Andrew Walsh]

I thought it was Shamu and Bamu, but Shamu obviously top billing. But that was my understanding.

[Luke Burbank]

So you know this. So in other words, Sham. This SeaWorld in Aurora, Ohio that you're speaking of, this is where Shamu lived? The Great Shamu?

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, or is it. Is it darker than that? Did they move this poor whale around? I mean, is that possible? I'm a. I sound like an idiot

[Luke Burbank]

now, but like they take the whale out on tourism.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let's see here. Shamu is the famous. Or were there more than one Shamu? That's probably the. That's really the

[Luke Burbank]

Shamu. 2

[Andrew Walsh]

Bamu head of the exact same hairline. Oh, wait, no, I'm wrong though. It's not even Bamu. It's Namu. Shamu is a famous stage name for the original performing orc At Sea World, while Namu sometimes. Let's see. Oh, sometimes humorously mashed up or remembered by fans as Bamu. At least I didn't totally make that up. Oh, wait a second. This is AI overview. Probably trying to make my search term work. God, you cannot trust them at all.

[Luke Burbank]

Anyhow, praise the machines. I blame them for canceling Colbert, by the way.

[Andrew Walsh]

Shamu was the stage name for several performing orcas at SeaWorld. There you go.

[Luke Burbank]

So there you go. I mean, and you're absolutely right. Why am I so literal? Sometimes, like, I'm like, oh, there's a picture of a killer whale jumping out of the water and it's Shamu. And I'm like. It never occurred to me they could just call any old orca Shamu. Yeah, we're not gonna know the difference, of course. Of course that's what they're going to do. I'm like, thinking like, well, must have been a real must. The logistics of getting Shamu to Aurora, Ohio, must have been like, no, just call the other whales.

[Andrew Walsh]

Just call them all.

[Luke Burbank]

No one's gonna know.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, or care. The first baby. Is that what I'm. Maybe I'm thinking of Baby Shamu. Do people call them the baby Bam?

[Luke Burbank]

Please don't say the words Baby Shamu.

[Andrew Walsh]

Please stop saying bamboo.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I just mean it's just, like, so. Just so depressing on so many levels. And the idea of it being a baby orca in that situation, My goodness gracious.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, good. Well, good work by me there.

[Luke Burbank]

From that slightly depressing topic to another, I don't know, kind of depressing topic, or at least a bit of a bummer, which is that last night was the final Colbert episode. I did not get to watch it in real time because I was doing. Wait, wait, don't tell me. But I did spend this morning trying to catch up on as much of it as I could. So I watched his monologue. I think, like you, Andrew, I was searching it for something that might be kind of TBT. Ellable today. Like, maybe we could use his intro tape. And, I mean, I thought it was pretty good. It didn't seem to lend itself to that. But in the. In the journey of trying to find some tape, I. I watched the monologue. I watched his musical performance with John Baptiste and his other. I forget the name of his. His. The. The current leader of his band. And then Elvis Costello. They did a Elvis Costello song. And then they did a hello Goodbye with Paul McCartney. That was literally the end of the show. There was this subplot running through it of a kind of a. Like a sort of a tear in the fabric of the universe that was calling Stephen Colbert to go towards it. And it was kind of evidenced by this green flashing light that kept. And sound that kept popping up throughout the episode. Retracking any of that.

[Andrew Walsh]

No. So here's my experience with this. Just so you know, I didn't really think I was gonna watch it at all, because as much as I love him, I didn't really watch that show. And also, the timing wasn't gonna work out for me. But I had a friend who was very interested in trying to watch it. Not just the west coast fe he would actually kind of watch it live as it aired on the east coast. And he was having some troubles. And so I had a little life hack it turned by the master of content. Yes. And so I had a feeling that I'd be able to find a stream of WCBS New York, which would be like just the CBS station there on the East Coast. And I was able to find that. And so I sent it to him earlier in the day. And then we were just getting back from Puppy kindergarten, Luke. Which, by the way, we got it. We were changing puppy kindergarten classes because Lucy is. She's not graduating up. She's just so huge that she doesn't bump belong with these small dogs anymore. So apparently there's a class for larger puppies of the same age. And so we're going to have to. Because it's getting. It's getting crazy. She's.

[Luke Burbank]

We don't call them large. We call them big. Milk boned.

[Andrew Walsh]

I will not write that down. But. So it was getting a little bit, like, it was getting a little bit weird how big she was. And they all have a lot of energy, but when you have little fluff balls that you can hold in your hand running around and playing, that's one thing. But when you have this giant beast amongst them, it was getting weird. But all of that is say Genevieve and I were. We had just gotten back home, unloaded Lucy, and we're just like. And I was like, oh, I wonder if that link I sent to my buddy worked. And so I clicked on it, and I didn't even clock what time it was, but there it was. I literally hit go on it as the music was playing to introduce him. And I was like, oh, my God, I guess I'll watch the monologue. It seemed like fate, so I. But I was just on my phone, so I just sort of, like, watched the monologue on my Phone. I thought it was kind of funny, but I did not get to the part where there was some sort of tear in the fabric. The ongoing bit that I saw during the monologue was the famous people who were planted in the audience kept standing up saying that they assumed that they were going to be Colbert's last guest. And he kept letting them down. Like Bryan Cranston was the first one and Tim Meadows and Paul Rudd. I think that was the only kind of ongoing joke I saw. So I'm guessing that either I missed it or they started this other joke after that.

[Luke Burbank]

The other joke started popping up later in the show where he's. I think their premise was we're gonna try to basically do a regular episode of the program, but then we're gonna keep getting interrupted by the fact that it's the last show. And again, these sort of celebrity cameos, et cetera. And so they kept doing kind of their. Some of their normal bits. Like he has a bit called Meanwhile, and he starts doing that and then he's getting like, there's like this kind of green flash of light and then a weird sound. And then over time, it keeps coming back. And he finally looks under the desk, he goes to a commercial break, which is kind of a fake out because he walks off stage. But they're still filming it. You know, this is now a video package. And basically this kind of quark or whatever, this green tear in the space time continuum is kind of. I think. Well, first of all, somehow the other Strike Force 5 guys are all showing up, which is the other, you know, kind of late night hosts that he's friends with. And they're talking about like the fact that like, essentially time is moving on and the nature of doing one of these talk shows is changing and it's not, you know, it's not 20 years ago. And the. What people want to watch and how they want to consume it is different. And this sort of green tear in the fabric of time is kind of representing that change in viewing habits and just the world. And so he's sort of trying to fight it throughout the show. Eventually it ends up swallowing up the entire show. And I don't think I'm spoiling anything because it's not a murder mystery. But the very end of the literal end of the show is it's Paul McCartney and Stephen Colbert in the supposed basement of the Ed Sullivan Theater. By the way, the Paul McCartney thing was pretty full circle because of course, the Beatles played on Ed Sullivan all those years ago. So the idea that Paul McCartney was kind of, you know, was kind of playing on that stage as a Beatle on the Ed Sullivan show and is now kind of turning out the lights on the last meaningful show that will be created in that television studio. Was kind of. I have to say, it did have a certain kind of bookend effect, you know.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can I ask you a question about that? And I'm sorry that I don't know. I should just know this. But, like, so it is just. Obviously, the Tonight Show's going away, but

[Luke Burbank]

this is the Late Show.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm sorry, the Late Show. The Tonight show is the fallen one. I knew I was gonna do that. I knew I was gonna do that. I can't keep them strai. That's why I shouldn't be allowed to even talk about this topic. I should be banned from talking basketball. But I understand that this is the legacy of not just the show itself and the brand itself, but this particular stage and this particular theater. And I've kind of just heard that assumption that, oh, yeah, the lights are going down on the theater itself, but. Well, then what is going to happen to this real estate?

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know the answer to that. But if. If I had to guess, I would say nothing good from cbs based on my experience. You know, I don't think. I mean. Well, I'm trying to think of other. I don't know enough. I mean, I've been in that theater. I've watched Colbert tape live, and I've been. I inter. I weirdly interviewed Depeche Mode backstage at that theater. So I've kind of been in there a bit. I don't remember what else, if anything, is being made there that is a CBS production.

[Andrew Walsh]

Will Byron Allen be producing his show out of there?

[Luke Burbank]

I'm guessing Byron Allen is using a soundstage somewhere in Tahunga, right, to unleash the comics.

[Andrew Walsh]

They clean up the porn set.

[Luke Burbank]

And then, yeah, out there in. Somewhere in Chatsworth, Byron Allen is renting an Airbnb right after a porn shoot, and he's gonna bring in the comics to unleash them. I would be really surprised if that show. If his show was going to be produced at this really cool facility in midtown Manhattan that's very expensive to run. So, yeah, I don't. I don't know what that. If anything is going to be made there. I mean, CBS is getting out of the business of making shows like this. So my guess is they'll sell the. You know, they will. They will sell or lease the real estate to somebody else for Some other purpose. But, yeah, I mean, it's a pretty legendary. This. This whole, like, kind of swan song for Colbert has been kind of interesting to me because, you know, he had Letterman on. They. They threw things off the roof. Like, it's almost given me nostalgia. Not even for Colbert, but for before Colbert. Like, you know what I mean?

[Andrew Walsh]

It's the end of an era. To quote our friend Ders.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that's exactly right. I think that's what has me feeling kind of wistful about it, is because I was never a daily nightly watcher of Colbert, I would see the clips that would pop up, like everybody who has a brain in their head. I recognize that he is comedically very talented and by all accounts, just a wonderful person. So I'm sad to see him go, but I'm really just sad to sort of see the format go away because really, all this nostalgia has reminded me of when I was a kid in, like, high school and, like, I went to my friend Joe Dolan's house. I've told this story many times, but when David Letterman moved from NBC to cbs. I don't know if this just makes me like a. A TV nerd about this kind of thing. I. I went to my friend Joe Dolan's house. They didn't have, for some reason, like, a TV in their living room. I remember we were in. I think we were in his parents bedroom, sitting on the floor of his parents bedroom, watching David Letterman premiere on cbs. Like, that was like a television event in my, like, freshman mind or whatever, you know, and like.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wait a second. Letterman, freshman? No way. That would be when. Oh, oh, oh. Like a transition to the.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, because Letterman started out on NBC and he was on after the Tonight show, and then the whole thing was. He wanted the Tonight Show.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

They gave it to Leno. That was the late night wars. And then CBS created a time slot for Letterman, I believe at 12:30. So he went to CBS, and I'm. I'm gonna guess you could actually Google that. Like, when did David letterman start at CBS?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, no, that's gonna peg it around early 90s. I just kind of got lost in the story a little bit. And I was picturing, like, the early 80s, letterman throwing. Okay, right.

[Luke Burbank]

Like craziness on. On late night on NBC. But just like, there was something about David Letterman and Stephen Colbert on the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theater, throwing office furniture off of it that just. It just made me so wistful for. I mean, really a time in my life when that was just going on every night. And I would watch it a lot of the nights, you know, and like, I don't know, it was. The thing is, time marches on, everything changes. You know, the very fact of the David Letterman show was itself a change from whatever had been happening before it. And there was a time when there were no late night shows, There was a time when there was no television. Like, everything changes and moves on. And it's like, I understand that and I know that that's just how life works. I guess what I'm kind of bummed about, I was also reading a bunch of think pieces about this today, including one in the New York Times talking about the comparison between the network late night shows and the stuff that's popping up on, let's say, YouTube, because the talk show format is not going away. It's just coming up in different ways now. And it's coming up on. You know, there's a show called the Adam Freeland show, which a lot of people watch on YouTube. Brittney Broski has a program. There's a lot of these shows that are often aimed at younger people and are a little more kind of intentionally diy. Although I'll tell you, they have. There is now a lot of money to be made doing these shows if they have a lot of viewers. And I was telling myself, well, yeah, it just means more creativity. It just means more. You don't have to be Stephen Colbert now, you don't have to be a white man of a certain age to be possibly handed the reins to this big franchise. And that's obviously a good thing. But you know what I miss? I miss all of us kind of knowing about the same thing. Like we are. We've just moved into a media world where there's so much good stuff to watch and listen to. It's not like we're lacking for content. It's just that, like, we're never going to all be watching the same content again other than maybe the Super Bowl. Like, with this, that era is over and I kind of missed it. I missed the days when if something like Drew Barrymore jumped up on the desk on Letterman, everybody was talking about it the next day. Like, and maybe that's just. Again, maybe that's just my age and my generation and maybe that's not something people care about. But, like, that's what I think I'm gonna miss about this. It's not that we're not gonna have content. It's not. I mean, this kid that we started the show with, what's His. Let me see if I can find his TikTok handle. He's just this, you know, he's this guy. I sent you his. I sent you his.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, you want me jump in? It's YB. LOL is what he goes on on TikTok. W y b I e l o

[Luke Burbank]

l l l and like you can't have a better example of what I'm talking about. Not that this kid is hosting a talk show. He's just in his house in his kitchen making little funny videos that have been cracking me up.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wait, you thought that was funny? I thought that was like I was gonna play this for my bully sen. Anti bullying message. Hey, if you've been bullying my friend, here's a little fun fact. It's not funny. You might immediately want to stop. Yes, I punch metal for fun and I do not give an absolute damn. I might be the baddest mother fluffer on this entire planet. I even have scars on my pinky. See, I'm not. I'm not laughing, Luke.

[Luke Burbank]

I do not give an absolute damn.

[Andrew Walsh]

First of all, that is rough language. That is rough language from that guy. But I am sending that to my bullies. You're going to get that. You're gonna get that video in your email.

[Luke Burbank]

I even have a score on my page. So like, the pros are this kid, YB Law, he doesn't have to be David Brenner getting called over to the couch on Carson. Like the star making system, the machinery of content and how we used to watch it and who used to get to make it has been completely busted open. And the upside of that is that I see this kid on TikTok who is making me laugh this week.

[Andrew Walsh]

Week.

[Luke Burbank]

The bummer of it is, is that I have to definitely send that to you or just walk around with my phone showing it to everyone and anyone I meet if they want to share the experience with me about why be lol. Because that we're not. There is no, you know, kind of like shared experience around these niche things and these funny things, which is a trade off. I guess it was just kind of comforting to me when. When something was happening and there were and I don't know when these stopped happening. Maybe it never even was a thing. But these water cooler moment, just the thing that you were kind of talking about with other people and we all were kind of on the same page. I liked that it made me feel connected to people and that's just not how the media is going to work anymore. And the end of Colbert feels like the end of that for me.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. And of course, for me, it always goes to a dark place because I'm trying to think of examples. I'm like, well, you're right. I'm not trying to just argue with you, but I'm trying to think, like. But what are some examples in our culture today that would come close to that. And you already mentioned the Super Bowl. That would come close, I mean, to the old phenomenon of us all sort of drinking from the same well, of kind of pop culture. And I think you're right. Like, the super bowl might be one. Like, you could almost talk to anybody about bad money, but it would be such an unpleasant conversation with so many people. You know what I mean? Like, it's also, like, so polarized. And it's not even just like, oh, the super bowl is. And the surrounding hoopla is like a focus that has taken over kind of the attention of the nation. Like, you can. You can actually make that argument like you did. But then it's like, yeah, but the way people are getting that information is so different, and the perspective on that information is so different. Like, I had a real.

[Luke Burbank]

You're bringing up a very dark counterargument, which is, we shouldn't be watching the same stuff.

[Andrew Walsh]

I mean, I don't know. Yeah, but I mean, that's the sort of the difference, too. Even the. Even the moments that maybe we are all talking about, we're getting. It's being presented to us. And of course, politics would be the huge part of that. And then all the. Just, like, the kind of culture war stuff is being presented to us in such vastly different ways, and we're all choosing the way we experience that information or that phenomenon or whatever it is.

[Luke Burbank]

I think you're right. I mean, I think you're talking. I think you're accurately describing modern life, and I think I'm nostalgically describing past life.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, yeah. No, I'm not trying to. Yeah, yeah, no, I'm not arguing with you. I was just like. Like, thinking, like, yeah, but there I almost was thinking about it. Like, kind of circles of influence. Like, as you were talking, I was sort of, like, picturing it. It's like, okay, back in the day, everybody always talks about this, and I hate to sound cliche, but you had, like, the three networks. Right. And so. And because of all of that, like, I guess the Beatles on Ed Sullivan would be the perfect example, which predates us by quite a bit. Right. But that would be.

[Luke Burbank]

My mom, to this day, talks about Watching that with her sisters on the. The base in the basement on Ripley street in Philadelphia. And my granddad Jack, standing in the background, not understanding what these long hairs were all about.

[Andrew Walsh]

I love the fact that Dad's always stood in the background watching the TV in the very.

[Luke Burbank]

They actually find cave paintings of this. Of a dad standing in the back as the kids watch cave fire.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

This fire seemed fresh.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

Arms cross, unsure about this fire.

[Andrew Walsh]

Anyway, that's a freebie.

[Luke Burbank]

Gary Larson.

[Andrew Walsh]

That is really good. But anyway, you know, I mean, so like, let's say the Ed Sullivan, the Beatles, and then Sullivan, that's just like one giant circle, right? But then maybe as time marches on, you're kind of like, well, you still had, like, in the 90s, when you and I were growing up, you had, like, let's say, four or five or six big circles. MTV would be a pretty big circle by that point, as well as the three networks and the Letterman of it all and maybe the Leno of it or whatever. But then you also, like, during that time, I'm saying, but you also had the small little circles that people like us are always seeking out, right? Like the Pixies, mixtapes we're making for each other, or Violent Femmes or whatever. Like the niche little thing was. And, like, in a certain way, I think our generation of people like us, we're looking for the small circles, like the smaller. Well, the reason we're drawn to this is because it isn't the mainstream. And so it feels like our little protected little passion, you know, which I love. And that's probably been around forever, too. But now you're right. It's almost like all the little bubbles are getting smaller and smaller and bubbling up like a glass of champagne.

[Luke Burbank]

They're tiny. In the words of Don Ho, they're tiny bubbles. We're one of them, by the way. We're one of the tiniest of the bubbles. But, like, I mean, yeah, it's like, I can imagine TBTL listeners who enjoy this show and listen to it on the daily, trying to then explain it to someone else and just knowing that there's. There's just no chance that if you bump. There's almost zero percent chance if you bump into someone on the street that you'll be able to say, did you catch that TBTL the other day? And then this is gonna be, yes. And they've got thoughts like, we just don't. We don't live in that world anymore. And. And again, I'm trying to kind of. And I Even think Colbert was kind of trying to do this. Oh, by the way, the end of the show is finally this. Whatever exactly it is. I mean, it was a kind of. It was a fairly surreal. It was a very Colbert show. I think this was. It might have been James Panawatitz in the Times pointing this out that, like, at his core, we sometimes forget because he's been so sort of respectable for so long. But Stephen Colbert's comedy is absurdist. You know, if you go back to Strangers with Candy and things like that, like, that's his real kind of foundational comedic, I don't know, approach. And this episode kind of had that. It was just a lot. You could tell it was just what Colbert kind of wanted to do because he was like, well, what else is gonna happen? It's my show. There was a moment, there's actually. I thought, very funny. Where he was doing one of these news stories, not in his monologue, but a little later. And the story was about how the Peanuts estate is suing people constantly for misuse from using the music without permission. And as he's reading it, the band starts playing a peanut song. And he's like, wait a minute. Are you playing a peanut song that says they continue to play? I sure hope CBS doesn't get sued over this.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's great.

[Luke Burbank]

It was a pretty good bit. But, like, eventually, this. Whatever, this green kind of thing of progress, you might call it, of changing interests and consumer habits, etc. When Paul McCartney and Stephen Colbert throw the switch on it, the Ed Sullivan Theater, first of all goes dark. This is from the outside. And then is sort of like in the. Almost like the big crunch, it's reduced down to nothing in this green light orb. And then it's a little miniature version of the building inside a snow globe. Inside a snow globe, which is kind of Citizen Kane. It's kind of the Bob Newhart Show.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

And then you see this. You see his dog walk, Cole. You just see kind of. It's actually a great shot. It's a kind of nod. It's a tight shot of the snow globe. And then, like, a dog's nose sniffing it. And then Colbert says, come on. I forget the name of the dog. Birdie or something. Come on, Birdie, let's go. And they just walk off. That's the show. That's it.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's really sad. Where is he walking? Like, what's the scene in New York City somewhere? Or.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, you don't even. You can't even tell, because what happens is the building is reduced down to a building inside of a snow globe. Now we're on a tight shot of the snow globe, presumably sitting on the street in Manhattan.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

And then we just see a dog's nose. We know it's Colbert's dog. Like sniff the snow globe.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

And then maybe some shoes. And they just keep moving.

[Andrew Walsh]

They never pull out. Okay, gotcha.

[Luke Burbank]

They never pull out.

[Andrew Walsh]

So let me ask you this about the, the guests. So you mentioned that the kind of the last hurrah, like sort of in the show itself is Paul McCartney playing. And what's the symbolic song that you mentioned before? And I forgot already.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, they. He did an Elvis Costello song called Jump up, which I'm honestly not familiar with.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

But that was also very Colbert. You could tell that Colbert just loves this song. So, so, and it was like, it was actually. I thought it was a very charming presentation of the song. It's. It's like I said, it was Elvis Costello, it's Stephen Colbert, it's John Baptiste. And it's again, I apologize that I don't know his name, but it's the guy who's been the band leader for all the years that it hasn't been John Baptiste. And they're sitting in a circle and it's very stripped down. It's just, it's Elvis Costello on guitar, it's John Baptiste on piano, and it's the other guy on guitar. And then Colbert's just sitting in a chair. They're all sitting in chairs with mics and they're just having a sing along, the four of them. And it, it's a, it's a cool song that I actually am kind of gonna like go look up now. But anyway, that it goes from that into. It's like, it goes dark again. There was. They were kind of jumping in and out of like video production in real time. And like. So then it goes from that scene, which was on tape to something else happened that I'm forgetting at the moment and which was giving basically time, I guess, to get everybody on stage and assembled. And all of a sudden the lights go up on stage. This is now live. And it's Paul McCartney, who had been the, the final guest and the only guest really.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, so that's what I was kind of getting at. I wanted to know kind of literally who was the last guest. And that's what I was getting. So it was McCartney. Okay, that's interesting.

[Luke Burbank]

And then they do, you say goodbye, I say hello. Which is also pretty damn. Pretty damn on. On on brand, on point, relevant. Kind of the perfect song there. And then it's. And actually, it was really sweet because, you know, as they get midway through the song, the entire staff of the show floods through the aisles up onto stage, and there's. Up in the catwalk and the balcony, and there's, you know, probably takes 3, 400 people to put this show on. And they're all on stage just dancing. Colbert's family is out there. It's just a whole. It's just a joyous, kind of beautiful thing. And then that's when they cut back to video of McCartney and Colbert turning the power off on the whole operation.

[Andrew Walsh]

Interesting.

[Luke Burbank]

It sort of goes away. And then that was. That was the thing. That was it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wow. That makes me. That actually makes it. You describe. I didn't even watch the final episode, and that makes me emotional, you describing that.

[Luke Burbank]

It was. I also felt like there was woven into it, maybe because Colbert was not pouting, but he was smiling throughout and he was appreciative, and that's kind of been. His general stance, you know, throughout was like. And also this idea of this green force of pro. I guess we'll call it progress. We'll call it change. It's inevitable. And his question of whether or not to jump through it, whether or not to embrace it, can you fight it? Like, I kind of felt like what he was saying was like, this is not the end. And of course, the song, you know, you say goodbye, I say hello. Like, I kind of felt like there was a wink and a nod here of Colbert kind of saying, like, look, look, this is not the end of entertainment. This is not the end of me making things. This is not the end of things that are good in our world. Things are changing, and we're. That's going to happen for all of us. But it felt to me like somehow ultimately, like, more positive than modeling. I don't know, maybe I just choose to.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, that's how I choose to read it. He stated that at the beginning. He said, this is going to be a joyous show. I don't know if he said joyous, but he said, we're going to try to do a. He said, we're going to try to keep the normal format. So, you know, even though it was punctuated by these celebrity cameos that were very meta in nature, like, he was just doing headlines in the monologue and. Which, by the way, were pretty flat,

[Luke Burbank]

I was shocked at the jokes they picked. I actually thought the actual monologue was like. It was. It was Maybe the audience was just kind of didn't know how to feel about the show being a regular show. But I was like, I was a little surprised at the jokes they picked.

[Andrew Walsh]

It was a little anticlimactic, I got to say. I mean, I guess I laugh. And again, keep in mind, I'm literally watching this on my phone as I'm sort of walking around the house like doing things. But I got, I got the ideal spirit.

[Luke Burbank]

By the way, you're part of the problem.

[Andrew Walsh]

I hope you're happy as I watch an illegal stream of it pirate the

[Luke Burbank]

content on your phone.

[Andrew Walsh]

Canada, by the way, the. But I think that's where the servers are. But all of that is to say, like, I guess I did sort of laugh when he was talking about the, I don't know, the small S scandal involving the Catholic Church with the hunky priest calendar and it turns out they weren't actually priests or something like that. And he just said, and he just said, this is the biggest scandal the Catholic Church has ever faced. I gotta say. He's a Catholic. Me growing up Catholic, that did make me laugh. But you're right though, but just very standard fare. But I don't think you're reading too much into it. I think that's what he wanted. And that's the one thing that, that's the one thing that's a little bit hard for me and Colbert. It's Colbert's show, it's Colbert's life, it's Colbert's experience. This is not a criticism, what I'm saying. I'm glad he got to say goodbye the way he wanted to say goodbye, given the circumstances. Having said that, we live in such a scary age where I want people who are more famous and more articulate than me to speak truth to power as much as possible because we are lacking that. And I feel like we are, are absolutely drowning in authoritarianism and authors and lies and all of this. And when you have it's like Stephen Colbert because he is so likable, so unbelievably smart, so not just quick witted, but just witty. And he's like the perfect ninja sword who can just cut so cleanly to the heart of the issues of the day. You kind of hope that you would love to see him not like leave a burnt ground behind him, but at least take advantage of the stage one more time where there won't be a lot of repercussions for him. They've already done the worst from that network level. Just one absolutely killer thing to Say or do, that undermines what is going on and highlights what is going on. Because this wasn't just about money. Although, as you said, 400 people stream to the stage. It's also an expensive show to put on.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

But also it is happening in this context of what's going on with CBS and how that is connected to what's going on in this country. And all. Just all of the awful stew that we're living in. Part of me is kind of like, use your. I guess that's why they call it literally. I was going to say rapier wit. Right. Isn't rapier a sword? Am I right about that? Like, literally, that's. Use the sword. You are the sword. Stephen Colbert just. Just cut out the heart. And let's watch a beat one last time.

[Luke Burbank]

See, I. I totally understand that impulse because it feels like it's so there are so few opportunities to really, in a meaningful way, speak to this administration, you know, and, And. And to kind of like, I don't know, get the upper hand in terms of the messaging or, you know, they're just. They've just consolidated so much power and they just, like, take out anyone who opposes them. And you're right. In a way, it would be so great to see Colbert pull that rapier out of the stone like Arthur, and then use it to great effect. But I also. I guess for me, there's also something about. And in fact, you know, he called the show a joy machine. So he came back after the break, and this was the tape I couldn't find. I was looking for it all morning. I saw it randomly last night, I think on TikTok or Instagram. And then I could not find it because it wasn't the monologue, Andrew. It wasn't Paul McCartney. And there were elements of the show that were on YouTube. Not this first thing after the first commercial break, which is, I thought was the most powerful part of the whole show. Maybe for me, he was sitting down, but not at his desk, and he was talking about the show, and he was talking about making a show like this night after night. And he was talking about how they would call this show the joy machine. And he got choked up when he was talking about the staff a little bit. That was the only time I noted him getting choked up, which for some reason I was obsessed with figuring out, is he gonna cry or not? And I thought that was the part I was trying to find and pull. And I was gonna send it to you and go, maybe it's a little serious, but Maybe is this the intro tape? But like, I guess for me, and I completely understand where you're coming from, which is like, maybe it was a missed opportunity to just like get a really savage own in on the administration from the person who could do it and had nothing to lose. I also appreciated the joyful nature of things. And maybe it's not an either. Or maybe your point isn't that it had to all be like we're taking on the Trump administration or we're having a joyful time. Those can both exist in the same same. In the same moment, I guess. But like, I don't know, I guess maybe for my personal self preservation, I'm choosing to embrace the joy side of it and just kind of say like, sometimes maybe feeling joyful and happiness is a form of, of dissent, you know, is like, because that's so much of what's been taken away from us. And so to like him sitting there singing with Elvis Costello and his other buddies, like, you could just tell on his face he was, was really joyful. And I liked that too, I guess,

[Andrew Walsh]

is what I'm trying to say. Yeah. And to be. I just want to restate again. What I'm saying isn't like, oh, he did it wrong or missed opportunity or like, I am happy that. I'm truly, truly happy that he got to choose the choice he'd make the choice that he made. You know what I mean? I truly believe that. Yeah, there. But there will always be a part of me that just said, man, we left our best weapon in the drawer. You know, just why, if you. Why am I keeping my weapons in a drawer though? So.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, also, why are you on Blue sky posting complete self owned by Colbert?

[Andrew Walsh]

I. Well, that's clicks. I was, I was rage baiting.

[Luke Burbank]

Colbert biffs it again. Again with the green screen behind you. What's going on? What is this content that you're creating? Hey, speaking of swan songs, I was involved in one that was, let's just say, not as nationally noted, but was actually a beautiful moment too, which was. It was Bill Curtis's last night as the announcer on. Wait, wait, don't tell me. And it was a very actually emotional time there in the Studebaker Theater. I'm not giving anything away to those who are, you know, don't want things quote unquote, spoiled for this weekend. But it was a really nice time. And you know, Bill Curtis, when we're at the top of the show, I was wondering again, because I'm just always clocking because I feel Like, I cry on this show too much. I'm always clocking. When do people cry? In sad moments or in.

[Andrew Walsh]

In.

[Luke Burbank]

Not even sad moments. In emotional moments in public. And I was like, I wonder how this is gonna be for Bill. I mean, he's been. He's a legend of broadcast media. He's done so many things. Is he just gonna be Stentoran and, like, is this just another day at the office for him? You know, he's wrapped up other gigs and he's moving on, or is this gonna be something that really gets him emotionally? And it was very sweet because after the intro, the first minute of the show, and we come back from the news break or whatever, and Bill says, you know, from the Studebaker Theater, I'm Bill Curtis. He said that? And then he paused and I thought, oh, did he lose his place? And I looked over and it was because he was just welling up. And when I tell you, all of us on the stage were welling up. It was very, very sweet and very. And we're just kind of kicking off. And by the way, it was the last time that happened. Everybody was very professional and very. You know, it wasn't like it didn't usher in a waterworks for the rest of the hour, but it was just like this very sweet moment for a guy who I really admire and. And really love and who did an amazing job on that show and really kind of was an important bridge. Cause if you remember, it was this guy, Carl Castle, and the whole kind of sort of. What do you. I mean, the reason the show kind of worked, particularly in the early days, was because you had this very low brow, by NPR standards, comedy going on with a very serious, respected, highbrow kind of voice of Carl Castle. And Bill Curtis was the perfect person to kind of jump in and take over when Carl moved on. So. So it was a really, really sweet night, and I was really glad to get to be part of it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's what I was gonna ask. I thought it was a little bit weird that you posted on Blue Sky. Carl did it better last night.

[Luke Burbank]

Gotta get those clicks.

[Andrew Walsh]

Roll it back.

[Luke Burbank]

Andrew, if you don't have a hot take, why are you even posting? It's like, at this point, it's like, do I want engagement or not? And so. Yeah. Did I burn some bridges? Yes. Is that my most fire Blue sky post in terms of engagement also?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

So it's every man for himself out here in this fractured media landscape.

[Andrew Walsh]

Has there been any public talk about what happens next with that role.

[Luke Burbank]

No. And I. And no private talk. Like, I don't know. I have no idea who I know. I don't think it's me. I feel like if it was gonna be me, I would have heard about that.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm checking my email, too, but I'm not seeing anything here. I got.

[Luke Burbank]

Do you have your spam filter on?

[Andrew Walsh]

But I think he sends that to a lot of people. I'm checking.

[Luke Burbank]

No, I don't. It's. It's unclear. We're going to a little. There's a little soiree tonight now just for people that work on the show, which will be fun. And there's no indication that there's going to be an announcement there either. So I guess, I don't know, maybe we find out next week.

[Andrew Walsh]

You could do that Tobias Funke thing where you're just like, could you find the water, the literal water cooler and just say, a lot of people are talking about this Andrew Walsh guy. I'm sick of hearing about him.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, I could. I'm happy to do that. If we can get a water cooler and if we can get everybody to come in from work, from home, and if we can get it back to three networks, then I think that might work. That water cooler campaign might be successful. But anyway, I just wanted to say a salute to Bill Curtis, who's a pretty big legend, and I was pretty lucky to get to work with him at the studio.

[Andrew Walsh]

Tobias began to create buzz around the water cooler. That Fiumke is some kind of something. Boy, this fuke is all anybody's ever talking about. So something sick and tired of hearing about how brilliant that punke is. Overrated. We'll just move on. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Okay. We're okay.

[Luke Burbank]

We was hoping for some razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle. That's right, man. Razzle dazzle.

[Andrew Walsh]

On your mark.

[Luke Burbank]

On your mark.

[Andrew Walsh]

Get set. Get set now. Ready? Ready, Go.

[Luke Burbank]

Everybody razzle.

[Andrew Walsh]

Everybody ra.

[Luke Burbank]

All right. We've got some dazzling donors to thank. We don't. We don't have that big NPR money around here, and we don't even have that big CBS money, and we've got a staff of three, but we're somehow able to. In fact, the irony, Andrew, is that today, and this sounds slightly cruel, you and John and I have jobs in the broadcast media and Stephen Colbert doesn't. Now, that's not gonna last for long.

[Andrew Walsh]

Save it for blue sky.

[Luke Burbank]

But what I'm saying is we have hit upon a more successful business strategy than Stephen Colbert has.

[Andrew Walsh]

Which is begging for money, of course.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. Which is begging for money and getting some of it. Thanks to folks like Robert Rowe in some Mamish Washington. This is 100% listener supported podcasting, of course. Robert says. Last year I ended my message saying that I was already stressing about next year's message. Well, another year has passed and I'm happy to report that I have not stressed at all about this message. Huh. What to write about. See, that's the move, Robert. It's like, don't borrow happiness from tomorrow by stressing about, you know, like, you're gonna have to write this dang message one way or the other. No reason to feel stressed about it for 364 days. Just put it out of your mind and then sit down to write it. That seems to be exactly what happened. He says. I'm reminded of a similar situation in high school when I put off writing a paper until the night before it was due. Then in the 11th hour, I remembered a paper I had written in grade school about NASA's Voyager space probe project. I still had that paper. I pulled it out and tweaked it a bit to bring it up to a high school level. I. I assume he recopied it. It was originally in crayon, and he did it in probably ballpoint pen or something.

[Andrew Walsh]

The case were backwards.

[Luke Burbank]

I pulled it out, I tweaked it a bit to bring it up to a high school level. I added some new facts and I turned that bad boy in. Having worked once, I recycled that same paper in college. Whatever NASA learned from the Voyager project pales in comparison to the traction I got out of it. Is there a power out to this story? Absolutely not. We've clearly entered the badlands of this donor's message. Love the show.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's a great story.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, and think about this, Andrew. In effect, Robert is recycling the essay once again.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Literally presenting the essay. But he's in the. Talking about the essay is essentially recycling the essay.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. Now I see a P.S. here.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes.

[Andrew Walsh]

Also. That I'm very curious about.

[Luke Burbank]

I know, but I'm like, I guess we're gonna have to. We're gonna have to wait until this. This message that Robert is referencing naturally occurs on the show. Robert says, P.S. i hear my sister, who's also a dazzling donor, has a hot take on her favorite taco time order. Golly, Andrew, I mean, if I could just click my heels and go right to that hot take, I would, but. But I guess we'll have to wait until Robert's sister pops up in the rotation, huh?

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, I'm looking here, so I'm doing some.

[Luke Burbank]

Are you able to quickly.

[Andrew Walsh]

So I have a list of it. I have. I have a list of all of the dazzling donor messages in front of me. Those that we have read and those that we have not read. Now, it is worth noting that not every dazzling donor actually submits a message. But I just. On. On the chance that his sister has the same last name, I did a search on Ro, but I'm not finding anything. I am. Look, the only other time Taco time apparently comes up in dazzling donor messages is from one we read from Diane Marshall back in May that says, I don't care if the topics you guys talking about is cable management or taco time, but that's as far as it goes. That's not a hot take necessarily. No offense to Diane. So either this message has not come through. I'm very curious about this because I would have. You know me, Luke. I like to just live on the seat of my pants. I would have swapped things around right now on the fly to get Robert's sister in here, but I can't find it.

[Luke Burbank]

Robert, please reach out to your sister and ask her what's going on with this, because there's nothing I love more. I'm in Chicago, Illinois, Andrew. They've got all kinds of amazing food here. And just the mention of a Taco time hot take has my mouth watering for taco time, which exists 1.5 miles from my house.

[Andrew Walsh]

Can you get a hot take at taco Time? And is it basically just a.

[Luke Burbank]

It's a spicy nug. It's a. It's a limited time offer. I mean, my hot take on Taco time is. I don't need any hot takes. I. I mean, I need them from Robert's sister, but I don't need any menu hot takes. Miss me with anything and everything that you're. I don't care. I don't care. I am going to order what I am going to order. And. And that is all. Thank you very much. I don't need any special sweet potato tots nugs. I don't need that Caesar, chicken, soft taco, whatever you're doing. Like, I know that. Like what you got to do with a restaurant, I guess, is you got to throw some new stuff in because there are people who. They go to the place and they get tired of eating the same thing. I'm not one of those people.

[Andrew Walsh]

And you can build commercials around it. You can get people to come that maybe have gotten out of the habit. But it's like, oh, they have this once and once a year special or they're trying this new thing. I feel like some of our friends collect those. Yeah. And people like make videos about they. You know, you get a bunch of people making TikTok videos about the new flavor blasted Baja Caesar salad.

[Luke Burbank]

Mm. Yeah. And you're right. There's a certain earned media opportunity. And again I. We've got friends in our, in our friend group, you know, in Seattle who like kind of get excited about the. Oh, they've got the new such and such at various places. I'm just such a creature of habit when it comes particularly to food orders, but to a lot of things to where I'm just like, I just want to get what I want to get and please don't ever take it off the menu. And I just have blinders on around the other stuff. So that's my hot take. But I look forward to at some point getting to the bottom of this. P.S. from Robert Rose, dazzling donor message. Robert, thank you so much for your support. We really do appreciate you. Maestro, on your mark, on your mark.

[Andrew Walsh]

Get set, get set now. Ready, ready, go.

[Luke Burbank]

Everybody rattle dazzle. My goodness. Goodness gracious. It is one of the oest of gist of tens. It is our friend Jen Joyce from the world of well, making and crafting

[Andrew Walsh]

and knit purling and taking me to Pixies concerts. Thank you again.

[Luke Burbank]

And so many other things. But also known in the early days as Ubergen because that was where Jen worked at the time and, and was nice enough to provide us with some advertising money. And by that I mean letting us get rides, which was so much better than advertising money. God, that was a sweet, sweet ride.

[Andrew Walsh]

It was a real. It was an official agreement right. With tbtl. This was around the time that, that I was working with you, but it predated me by a little bit. But it was like, it was a, it was a. Was it a structured agreement, like an actual advertising agreement, but you were paid in kind of car miles or points or whatever.

[Luke Burbank]

I think it might have been open ended. That's what was so sweet about it. First of all, these were in the. These are in the earliest days of Uber when they were all black cars.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Nobody knew what it was. I found out about it through you

[Luke Burbank]

and tbtl and then I think it was just a deal that was. I mean Jen would know, but it was basically like, we'll do some ads and then if you need a ride, hit them up and it was fantastic. Anyway, Jen has been a friend of the show in so many different ways for so many years. Jen says thank you for being so great and always delivering that quality content. I truly love being a 10. I'm currently working on converting my partner, Daniel. We're not fully there yet, but if I'm listening, he'll suddenly look up and say, hey, that's Andrew. Which honestly feels like real progress. Daniel, I just launched my business a fractional marketing leadership practice. It's called In Good Company. Oh, that's a solid name in Good co, by the way, period. But I just decided to elongate it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Jen says because the best work happens in Good company. I help growing companies that aren't ready to hire a full time experienced marketing leader or have talented junior marketers who could use support by stepping in to lead strategy and big picture thinking. Okay, so that is what a fractional marketing leadership practice looks like. So if you're a company and you could use some highly qualified professional creative problem solving marketing from somebody who really knows, and that would be our friend Jen Joyce. Have you heard of the company Uber? It's gone pretty well in the marketing of that company. You could hire Jen's company to come in and work work for you as needed on these projects. If you need support by stepping into a lead strategy and big picture thinking, you can learn more about me. Some wild ideas I've brought to life. Uber Kittens anyone?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, that's right.

[Luke Burbank]

That was a biggie. That was where they were ubering kittens to people.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think so. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

With. I think there was human, you know, chaperones. I don't think they just threw.

[Andrew Walsh]

You don't think the kittens were driving the cars? I disagree with you.

[Luke Burbank]

That was. And honestly, it was a big swing and a miss. That part of the project. And Jen owns that. Yes, Jen owns that miss. Then they figured now we should have the kittens get a ride in the Uber.

[Andrew Walsh]

We let humans drive the kittens and that was it. That, that was a huge breakthrough.

[Luke Burbank]

And that's it. It's about pivoting. It's about failing fast, but learning on the fly. And that's exactly what Jen brings to the table. In fact, the next line is, that's what I bring to the [e-mail] that's always in goodco.com. click on the link, check out the website. It'll tell you everything you need to know about how you can link up your business or your project with our friend Jen Joyce, one time known as Uber. Jen also. Jen says. I also share maker stories via my podcast called Making Conversation. And I co host a free maker meetup in Seattle. It's called Stitch and Poke. You can find out info about both on my Instagram. By the way, Jen is a great follow over at Knit, Pearl, Knit. And then purl is spelled a P U, R L. That's. I mean, that's a. Like a crocheting reference, I believe, or a knitting reference.

[Andrew Walsh]

I thought it was knitting because it's knitting.

[Luke Burbank]

It's knitting. It's right there in the name. But then as purl. Is that how you spell. That's how you spell that part of the knitting and the purling process. I guess I always think. I thought in my mind it was spelled differently.

[Andrew Walsh]

Like a pearl, like under the.

[Luke Burbank]

Like a pearl. But no, it's. It's your purling, your P U R L ing. So it's knit and then P U R L. Jen says thanks again, business boys. And to the tens, you're the best. So, hey, if you need marketing help, if you're a maker or you're an aspiring maker, hit jen up at knitpearl or [e-mail] and Jen, thank you so much. You're the best. And Daniel, could we get an occasional. Hey, that's Luke.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, don't worry about that.

[Luke Burbank]

That kill ya?

[Andrew Walsh]

Don't worry about that. Here I go once again with the email. Every week, I hope that it's from a female. Oh, man. It's not from a female.

[Luke Burbank]

All right, I'm sorry that I keep promoting Cars for Kids and not getting to it, but here's the. The, the long and the short and the cars and the kids of it. California officials decided that the 1-877-cars-for kids ads were misleading because none of the money from the cars that you were donating to Cars for Kids were going to kids in California or a very small amount. It was mostly going to summer camps in New Jersey and other projects that in New York that were connecting primarily Jewish kids with their Jewish heritage. And it was doing very little for any kids, be they Jewish or otherwise, in California. And the Cars for Kids people said, we're very clear on our website where the money is going, so we're going to challenge this. But for the time being, they are not allowed to run the ads they've been running because they're seen as misleading, which makes sense.

[Andrew Walsh]

I mean, I, you know, this isn't getting into judging the organization itself, but when you Hear those commercials which give very little information. It just really sounds like, oh, this goes to help, you know, disadvantaged youth. Right. And it just sort of. It's Cars for Kids. But no, it's a. It's, you know, it goes to an organization that has a very different, specific sort of angle, including, like. And this might be an outlier, but some of the money also goes to. Well, that all goes to this organization. The organization also provides like, sort of like couple resources. And I wasn't there even like kind of a. Like an app or some sort of a meeting, like kind of a dating app or something that goes along.

[Luke Burbank]

I believe that was part of it.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's all. Yeah, and it's just kind of like, you know, that's all well and good, but that's not what you think you're supporting when you donate your cars to Cars for Kids.

[Luke Burbank]

Anything. Well, I don't know. I was gonna say anything that means less of that ad playing on the radio, but. But to be honest with you, it's part of the fabric of. Of listening to local radio and driving around that also is happening less and less. I was been on this whole nostalgia thing around Colbert wrapping up, but it's like, there's almost something that's great about terrible commercials on the radio because it means you're listening to the radio, you're listening to AM radio and working in your yard or driving your car or something. And like, you know, I don't know. Do we think it's a good. Is it a good thing that there are fewer people that are going to have to hear the Cars for Kids ad, or is there something that's beautifully terrible about it?

[Andrew Walsh]

I. Am I the perfect person to ask or the worst person to ask? Because I hear it so often because I'm listening to that kind of radio. It is both the perfectly worst person. Goodness, we're so close to the end of the show without a show title, and now I'm writing that down. But I, you know, I don't know. I mean, there are. There is something I like about. Well, first of all, it's not local. There's something I like about local advertising, like a local AM advertising, and they've just blanketed that. It's a national campaign, which is kind of also at the heart of this lawsuit, I think. And have you heard the newest one, by the way, where the kids start singing and then they kind of record scratch it and they have like, an updated version of their, their. Of their jingle? It's still the same jingle, but it's just, like, presented differently. Have you heard this?

[Luke Burbank]

No, I think the last one I heard was when they went to hard rock.

[Andrew Walsh]

That was awful.

[Luke Burbank]

It was they. When they decided to really shred.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, you're being serious. They did have a rock. No, they did. Are you. Are you being serious? Are you being sarcastic? Because they did have ready one. Yeah. And they have, like, pink electric guitars and stuff.

[Luke Burbank]

Like that's. That's the last. Last that I was clocking.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Particular, like, you know, because it started off, of course, very like, bink boom, bink boom one, 877 cars for kids. And then like, maybe 10 years ago, they switched over to, like, rocking out cars for kids. And that's when I just said, enough is enough. I think you're right, though. I think it's good to have less of it because it's not local. If it was one crazy dude.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

In a town who was running this program and decided to have that jingle, I would like it. But the fact that it's this very, very highly, highly sort of. What's the word I'm looking for? Like, structured. Very effective way of extracting free cars from people and then turning that into money for God knows what. And that it's playing everywhere in America. It's, like, not as cute, it's not as boutique, I guess, as I would like something like this to be.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Yeah. That's why I don't feel like it's a huge loss for the radio listening audience, even if you're a. A psycho like me who kind of likes bad local ads. Now, do you want to talk briefly about this email that came in? And I had totally forgotten. I tried to squeeze this in at the end of yesterday's show, and then you said, hold off on that. And then I forgot about it. Thank you for reminding me of this. This was an email. The subject line, the Midwest remembers Andrew. The subject line caught my eye immediately. It said, confessions of a Meta Marketplace shopper. Now, this was inspired by your issues. Trying to sell things on places like Facebook Marketplace and Meta Marketplace and whatever the hell they call Craigslist. Craigslist, but specifically sort of Facebook Marketplace has a particularly bad reputation when it comes to people just like saying, I'm interested in this thing, but then they end up ghosting or not being a person.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. I had listed my riding lawnmower, which didn't ride anymore, for sale on there, and I got a very quick bite, and then that person sort of went a bit silent. And I was on the show going, like, it's just the weirdest ecosystem because again, people seem to be very, very interested in something and they'll be like, I can be there in an hour. And then you just never hear from them. Any follow up and it's like, what happened to the Dufresne? You know, and, and, and, and then we got this email and I was about to say that by the way, I did sell the lawnmower.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh yeah. And then all went well. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Did ask me to take $100 off and I was glad that I had jacked it by 100. Yeah, it all worked out. But it was the exact, almost the exact price of buying the new lawnmower that I bought Andrew the DeWalt that's at home.

[Andrew Walsh]

And it was new. And you got a new one. That's nice.

[Luke Burbank]

I got a new one. It's still in the box. I got it from Home Depot and

[Andrew Walsh]

man, I'm going to break. You were excited to gas.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, gas prices. It's gas powered. And I am, when we fly home tomorrow, I am going to like I'm landing and I am going to jump in my car and I'm going to speed north and see if I can get that lawn mode by tomorrow night. I am, I could not be more excited for that's my big weekend plans. But all I was going to say was when we got this email from the listener, I honestly, because it said Confessions of a Meta Shopper, I thought, is this a PR pitch? A little bit like a PR pitch. And then I almost tossed it in the dust bin. And then I was like, wait a minute. The opening. Because you know, it previews the opening sense. I was like, no, no, this is written by A10. And then I clicked on it and then I thought, this is a hell

[Andrew Walsh]

of an email, by the way. After you get done mowing your lawn with your new push mower tomorrow, assuming the weather holds up and it's sunny, will you, will you, will you try twisting a tee afterwards?

[Luke Burbank]

I might twist a T during. I don't know.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, no, no, you gotta earn it. You gotta be done.

[Luke Burbank]

I do.

[Andrew Walsh]

This is way of twisting teas. You gotta be done with the, all the yard work. Maybe you've lit a little fire in the backyard. Maybe you're just sitting on the porch afterwards admiring your work. And that is where, yeah, you open up a can of this and you pour it over ice in a pint glass and you sit back and you just look at your work.

[Luke Burbank]

I'll give it a day in court. And by the Way I know we need to get to the email, but like, that's actually something that I was in my mind because I'm not gonna lie, I didn't hate having a cup, a few small beers and driving the lawnmower.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, okay.

[Luke Burbank]

Because there I'd listen to my music. I had a whole system. I would listen to my music, I'd have a beer. I'd be coming down from this one part of the yard down to the other yard, the rivers there. It's all this whole thing. I'd kind of have this moment that I liked and part of why I liked the riding mower, because that allowed for that. Whereas I don't have that same experience. I don't want to be a little buzzed while I'm like pushing a mower up a hill. That feels like those are counterpoints or cross purposes. And so I'm going to shift into a mode where the mowing of the lawn will be done in the highest levels of sobriety. But the admiring of the lawn may be a little twisted. Twisted.

[Andrew Walsh]

You know, my grandfather cut off his big toe with a lawn. A push lawnmower. Yeah, yeah. More on that. Maybe at a later date I can get more details on that story and regalia with it. But I believe one of my aunts had to put the toe on ice.

[Luke Burbank]

All right. They reattached it though.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, they didn't, because I remember. I don't think so. I think they tried to.

[Luke Burbank]

You need that big toe. That's a big stability issue.

[Andrew Walsh]

I know. It all was downhill from there. Catherine wrote. Hey there, cobros. This is Catherine from Spokane. Somehow still a daily listener from the early Cairo days. What do you mean somehow? Yes, I felt so seen last week and need to speak up for all of us marketplace. That's why you're still listeners. That's right, all of us marketplace ghosters. Now hear me out. We're not all bots. It's a lot more psychological than that. I think the majority of us are just dopamine shoppers trying to reinvent our lives one almost purchase at a time. As an attachment based mental health clinician, I can say with certainty that this is a shameful way of interacting or this shameful way of interacting online is certainly filling a core need of mine. I'm absolutely the person lying in my bed at 10:47pm sending quote, is this still available while half listening to you dummies and simultaneously reinventing my entire life around a used lawnmower for the home I just put purchased or the vintage hutch that might look good in the entry or the too good to pass up puzzle storage case. It's not entirely my fault. Marketplace knows my every thought and new home decor or what specific upgrade to my child's bike I'm hoping for, even when I don't know it yet myself. But in that moment when I click send message to sender, I fully believe I'm buying it. I asked for dimensions, location, extra photos, the whole thing. Then the seller replies eight minutes later and suddenly I'm no longer. I'm no longer in my become the kind of person who owns a used croquet set era. So I quietly disappear into the night. My worst sin to avoid the shame of the seller ever seeing that I had read their message and chosen not to respond. I usually don't even open up the reply giving me the meetup time or dimensions I asked for because I already know I won't ever commit. Marketplace shopping feels like consequence free because there's no cart, no checkout, no real commitment, just a tiny hits of possibility and fantasy. Anyway, I'm not saying this is right, but it certainly feels good to confess it here. Perhaps a new segment called Monday Confessions. That's a terrible name. I'm sure you can workshop it, but this felt very good to put down on paper. So thank you for the opportunity and I'm sorry to everyone I've ever asked asked is this still available? I can pick it up tomorrow and then never have spoken to again. Peace and love. Power out. And that again is from listener Catherine.

[Luke Burbank]

There are just so many parts of that email that I feel so connected to seen by. First of all, I love that Catherine is a mental health professional but is copying to all of this. Yeah, I also the the part about kind of like impulsively reaching out about this product but then or thing and then changing your mind an hour later and then not wanting to go back and click on the message as if that makes it the reply make, that makes it not exist. That explains so much of my avoidant behavior on so many levels. It's like avoiding the mailbox, avoiding that email that's been sitting in the inbox. Avoiding like avoiding the repercussions of something that I started but now don't want to deal with, with or don't want to experience and not respond to that text message. You name it. Kathryn, I'm so with you on that.

[Andrew Walsh]

So as we wrap up here and head into our weekends, I have a 30 second story to tell you. Actually, I don't even Know if I need the whole 30 seconds.

[Luke Burbank]

Whoa.

[Andrew Walsh]

But I'm looking at my email here, and I'm seeing several notes from listeners that reminded me of something that happened to me yesterday. Genevieve got home just a little bit before we had to leave again with Lucy to go to puppy kindergarten, as I mentioned earlier. And Lucy had a new toy in her mouth that I did not recognize. Like, what's in her mouth?

[Luke Burbank]

And Genevieve said, a butt plug.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, no. Did you see that from the listener? I did, yeah. Listener. After hearing my story of Lucy finding and then putting used condoms in her mouth on our walks around this neighborhood, a listener said, I lived in a neighborhood not unlike that. We'd often have things thrown over our fence. And one time it was this. And it was this photo of just the biggest butt plug you could possibly imagine.

[Luke Burbank]

Anyway, I can't imagine a bigger one. Who knew, by the way, that dogs were such creepy freaks.

[Andrew Walsh]

Maybe I'm misremembering. It seemed big to me. But I mean, also, there's no limit to your imagination.

[Luke Burbank]

That's what we would like to teach the listeners this week. Week. There's no limit to your.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah, you know, I get. I will say that in my. In. I just opened this email, and in my memory, that thing was. That was much bigger, which means I can also imagine a bigger butt plug. Anyway, no, it wasn't a butt plug. It wasn't a sex toy. What do you think was in. What do you think was in Lucy's mouth? I will give you a hint. This was. It was something that was given to Genevieve at a work event the day before in. Genevieve works for a university.

[Luke Burbank]

It was a. What's the very university thing. A cap and gown. A plush husky.

[Andrew Walsh]

Think less about academics. Think more about the age of people who are on campus.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, okay. Okay.

[Andrew Walsh]

Was it a story that we told recently on this show based on a New York Times trend piece about something young people are doing again that our generation was very into?

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, oh, oh. Why can't I remember this? Give me one more hint. Yes, young people are. They were doing something that we used to do. This was like this week we were talking about.

[Andrew Walsh]

I think it might have been Monday. I'm looking at it. Cause I think we named the show. It was a rare thing where. Oh, maybe it was last Friday. We named the show after what you put how you slugged the story on the show sheet. It made me laugh. We got to the end of the show. We didn't have an obvious show title. I looked at the show sheet. Sheet. And this is how you slug the story. Hacky sack is backy sack.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Which made me laugh. All of that is to say I just thought it was interesting that I did not know about this phenomenon of hacky sacks being backy back or backy sack. And then Genevieve came home from some work event and as some sort of free swag or swag or whatever you call it, they're giving away hacky sack. So I would say that you're right. Like hacky sacks Lucy seem good.

[Luke Burbank]

Was she doing any kind of impressive foot bagging?

[Andrew Walsh]

She was like holding. She did this thing where she could pause, pause it on her paw for a second and then. And then toss it to the other one. Now I was a little bit like, well, let's not let her go too far with this thing because she's going to chew it open and then we're all going to find out what's inside of a hacky sack and then we're going to find out what's inside of a Lucy. So I wasn't.

[Luke Burbank]

Was it one of those. Was it one of those kind of crocheted ones that we talked about versus the leather one?

[Andrew Walsh]

It was more like a leather one. It looked like a little leather soccer ball sort of. But I don't think it was like, listen, this was a free giveaway. I don't think it was a nice leather whatever you were picturing, but it

[Luke Burbank]

was more like a leather. Did she sign up for a credit card and then get a free hacking sack? I would say don't do that. I made that mistake on that very campus.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know. She had a new thermal mug too.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, not worth it if it's a girl.

[Andrew Walsh]

See you on it. I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, speaking of hacky sacks being backy sack, thanks to whoever gave our guy John Scaroff. Oh yeah, TBTL employee numero uno. A very sweet looking hacky sack. At a that recent meetup that happened back in Minnesota, John went to that meetup and then sent us a photo of a cool hacky sack that was given to him by a 10. That means when we get together for the THON this year, IRL, the three of us, we've got to have.

[Andrew Walsh]

We gotta do some hacky sacking. I'm looking at some of these emails now. Kelly in Belltown wrote to us to say that she was at Gasworks park and there was a family there. Hacky sacking it is. Everybody's hacky sacking king. This is incredible. Okay, we should get out of here, though. You have Chicago to enjoy. Are you traveling today? Are you enjoying Chicago? Oh, no. You get together tonight?

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, there's a. There's one. There's one more celebration of Mr. Bill Curtis tonight. And then tomorrow we are going to be flying back to the Northwest. So I could. Becca was like, well, do you want to hang out on. On Saturday after we land? And I was like, well, I have some very important, important business to intend to, and it's called mowing my lawn. It's all I can think about.

[Andrew Walsh]

I.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, it almost feels. It's the closest I can come, I think, to identifying with. When you sometimes have garbage anxiety, Andrew, you need. All I can think about is how much is my lawn growing.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yep.

[Luke Burbank]

And is it growing to the point where I won't be able to mow it? Because it's. Because, you know, I. It's now gone over a week in the real growing season. And am I going to get home and am I going to have to weed whack 1.5 acres to get it down to a manageable level? Like, this is what's going on. This is the low level vibration in my brain right now. Not Chicago, not all the fun we're having. My lovely girlfriend. Wait, wait, don't tell me. Tbt. No, it's. Is my lawn going to be a nightmare when I get home? And also, how good is that twisted tea going to taste when I survey the freshly mowed lawn with my new lawn?

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, I don't think they're actually going to do the twisted tea thing, but if you do, just a little bit of advice for me. Number one.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

No more than one. It's like it's going to be too sugary for you. It's just. It's going to be very sugary. And that is number two, why you have to have it on ice. Do not drink it directly out of the can. Do not pass go. And then thirdly, if possible, when you're buying it, try to get the Arnold Palmer one. Half lemonade, half lemonade. It's going to. Some of that lemonade is going to the cut. Sweetness.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, man. Lemonade, like news you can use for your life from a guy who knows. Thanks for that. All right, that's the plan for my weekend. I hope the rest of you have a wonderful weekend as well. Thank you so much for spending this time with us this week. We're gonna be back here on Monday. It's Memorial Day, but we're gonna be here. Oh, Andrew. With an update on the Junior Sluggers. And I don't want to give too much away, but I'm gonna send you a photo after the show today of the Junior Slug Sluggers.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, great.

[Luke Burbank]

And I think it's going to warm your heart even more than a twisted tea would.

[Andrew Walsh]

So find out for Monday's show pick.

[Luke Burbank]

We can and we will. Oh, I'll ask Coach Ben.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sure.

[Luke Burbank]

Anyway, we'll see you on Monday, everybody. In the meantime, have a great Memorial Day weekend. Enjoy the weather, take care of yourselves, be safe. Go Mariners. And please remember, no mountain too tall.

[Andrew Walsh]

And good luck to all. 206-414-TBTL what awkward story are you ready to tell? 206-414-TBTL Call up the guys today.

[Luke Burbank]

414tbtl 414tbtl it's in the 206 power out.