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Andrew Walsh
And now, deep thoughts by jack handy. Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Mankind. Basically, it's made up of two separate words, mank and eind. What do these words mean? It's a mystery.
Luke Burbank
And that's why.
Andrew Walsh
So is mankind.
Luke Burbank
Now, I don't know much about this podcasting business, but let me tell you, there's something about this show that just gets me hooked. These guys have a way of talking
Andrew Walsh
that's like having a chat with your
Luke Burbank
neighbor over the backyard fence.
Listener Bri
Just like the drop says, I cannot contain my joy.
Andrew Walsh
I don't think I've ever related to a drop so much. Right now it's the story of a
Luke Burbank
man with a brothel, of a home
Andrew Walsh
in a pool filled with human excrement. You heard it here first, ladies and gentlemen. And the it that you heard was
Luke Burbank
the things that these people just said. Please clap. All right, hello, good morning and welcome, everyone, to a Tuesday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live.
Andrew Walsh
Carol, hold my coals.
Luke Burbank
My name is Luke Burbank. I am your host, coming to you today from Houston, Texas. Houston, we have a boner where it is an absolutely. Already like 85 already at 11 in the morning. It is. It's muggy. It's warm. It's warm.
Andrew Walsh
And I'm levitating.
Luke Burbank
We did have a. A little rainstorm move through earlier today, which hopefully will cut the heat a little bit here. You know you like to get wet, though. But yes, we've made it to Houston. We were in Las Vegas yesterday. We did Livewire in Portland on Friday. We were filming Crime Con over the weekend. It's definitely starting to hit a wall here. I happen to know a guy who's at his limit, woke up this morning, and I was like, where am I? What am I? Who am I? But then I remembered I'm the co host of TBTL and we're at episode 4740 in a collector series, Let the fun Begin. This hotel is in something that's literally called, like, the medical district, which of course would mean it's in the middle of, like, 30 enormous hospitals and medical centers, which turns out many of which receive emergency vehicles and send out emergency vehicles. And so that's going to be happening in the background of this today. I'm sorry about that.
Andrew Walsh
Hey, want to hear the most annoying sound in the world?
Luke Burbank
We're just going to try to get through it together. Oh, and speaking of annoying interruptions, I am realizing here from my seat in the hotel room that I didn't put the little, you know, indicator on the door to go ahead and skip this for housekeeping this morning. And I just heard a knock on the door. Hopefully the annoying sound of me podcasting from within the room is the. It's the international sign for do not enter the room. So hopefully the folks will just know to move on. But otherwise I'm have to take a moment. I'm going to have to go over, I'm going to have to explain what a podcast is first. I'll call it a radio show. Then I will actually say, no, it's not a radio show, I was lying. It's actually a podcast. Then I'll explain what that is and then I'll say, I'm doing that in the room right now for my job, so please don't come in. Anyway, there's just so many plot lines that are going to be unfolding over the next hour or so, and the guy who's going to help us follow all of these plot lines and threads down is this dude. The longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ship. Isn't he the best Is Andrew Walsh and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.
Andrew Walsh
Good morning, Luke. Sometimes updates aren't so bad. I know that's a controversial take. Usually we're using a computer program.
Luke Burbank
Spicy, like Viet Cajun cooking.
Andrew Walsh
Yes. Is that what you're covering?
Luke Burbank
Yes, that's what I'm here learning about in housing.
Andrew Walsh
It's a very spicy take. But you and I logged into our little recording software here called Riverside. It connects us remotely, it records emotionally
Luke Burbank
and also from an audio standpoint.
Andrew Walsh
Exactly. And it's one of those systems where whether they need it or not, every four to seven months, they just do like kind of a complete overhaul of the UI in a way that in my experience always makes everything a little bit more difficult to find. Like, hey, we've nested things further and further and deeper and deeper so that you can't find anything. And it always seems very kind of engineering to me. With all due respect to our engineering friends, we need our engineers to create the technology. But then we need some kind of non engineer minds to kind of navigate us through the usability standpoint on things. Anyway, Riverside, in my not so humble opinion, doesn't have the best record on usability when they do these updates. But you and I both just logged in today and we're on a very tight deadline today, which is why I'm starting with this scintillating story. And. And we realized, oh, my God, they've totally changed the interface overnight. Like, how you log in. Is it going to work? And I was like, we didn't have time today to deal with any, like, you know, wrenches in the works or whatever the expression is. So anyway, all of that is to
Luke Burbank
say flies in the ointment.
Andrew Walsh
Flies in the ointment. What am I? Monkey wrench? I think I got caught in the word monkey. Is it monkey wrench in the.
Luke Burbank
I think a wrench in the works is something. Throwing a wrench into the works. I think you said that right.
Andrew Walsh
Is it a wrench in a monkey? Is there a monkey involved? Did the monkey throw the wrench?
Luke Burbank
You've been living in the monkey house.
Andrew Walsh
I've been living. I've been living in the monkey house. Tim Gunn, Andrew Walsh.
Luke Burbank
If I had a bell, I ding it.
Andrew Walsh
My bell. I'm going to ding my old bell. And I don't care what they say.
Luke Burbank
All right, Please. Now it's a family show.
Andrew Walsh
All of that is to say we are now navigating this new world of this new update, you and I. So far, it seems to be okay. Like, I was worried that it wasn't going to work for us and that we were going to be, you know, late to start the show, but it's been okay. But I've noticed one thing, Luke, that is 100% an upgrade, at least from my perspective. And I'm wondering if you've noticed this as well, but Riverside always had this thing where when you first logged in, when you first dialed in, it would take a little screenshot of you that would become the sort of avatar for you for the rest of your recording session. But it never asked you, like, is this the shot you want to use? It was the equivalent of opening up your phone camera and realizing it's on selfie mode. And you get a glimpse of yourself for a second, you're like, oh, God, not that angle only. It would freeze that. It would keep it in front of you for your entire recording session. You're just like, oh, that's what I look like when I logged in.
Luke Burbank
Weeks of my life trying to dig out from the emotional damage of not realizing my phone was in selfie mode and then looking down. It happens to me, unfortunately, in TikTok, when I'm looking at TikTok a lot, because there's a swipe left thing that just is turning your phone into a TikTok making machine. And I'm not feeling good about myself. Generally When I'm looking at TikTok, which is a sign, by the way, that it's a good product, that while I'm using it, I'm feeling shame and sadness. I'm sitting there an hour or two of scrolling, and then I'll just accidentally bump it over to where it says, well, would you like to make a TikTok? And I'm like, holding my phone on my lap. It's just looking up at me. Those are images I'll never get out of my mind. So, yes, that is also, maybe not quite as bad, but a feature of the Riverside program that we. Or at least it has been historically. Are you saying they got rid of that?
Andrew Walsh
Well, look on your interface now, over on the right, we just have a little A and a little L representing us now. You and I have our cameras off today because of, again, technical reasons. You're on the road. Didn't want to take up too much bandwidth with this. But usually it wouldn't even matter that you and I turned our cameras off, because what it does is it just grabs that very split second when you first log in before you can turn your camera off, and it just stays there as a reminder of what you look like. You know what? I'm trying to think of a famous mugshot. And if I type in famous actor mugs.
Luke Burbank
Nick Nolte.
Andrew Walsh
Thank you. Literally, I was gonna say, like Gary Busey, only not as crazy for some reason. I can I link those guys in my head, I think because of the teeth. They're both Mr. Tall Teeth, sort of.
Luke Burbank
Well, they're like kind of white guys of a similar age who have. Who have. I don't know about Nolte's teeth, but they just. Here's what it was. Nolte was so bedraggled in his mugshot that he had entered into Busey territory.
Andrew Walsh
Maybe that's what it is.
Luke Burbank
Like Nick Nolte in the movie let's say Blue Chips, where I believe he's playing a college basketball coach. Is Shaq in the movie Blue Chips. Nick Nolte is on. On camera, fairly put together guy. Gary Busey is, let's just say, free ranging through life. And there was something about Nick Nolte looking so free range in that mug shot that just made him culturally and spiritually Gary Busey in my mind as well.
Andrew Walsh
I'm having a moment right now. I don't want to exaggerate it, and I'm trying to figure out if I'm just saying this, but honestly, I just looked up Nick nolte's mug shot and pretty good look. I mean, it's. Let's just say that as I age and my looks go in a certain direction, I look at a man with a full set of hair and I say, hey, listen, like, I've looked worse than this, and I've never had a mug shot taken before.
Luke Burbank
I mean, certainly the important question is, what was Nick Nolte's age in 2002 when this mug shot was taken?
Andrew Walsh
It was 2002. Did you just figure that out?
Luke Burbank
That's just what the Internet is telling me. That's what they're telling me on Ask Jeeves. It says Nick Nolte on his infamous 2002 mugshot.
Andrew Walsh
So he was born in 1941. If you round that up to 42, that would put him at 6. Am I right about that? Is that 61?
Luke Burbank
I guess this is on me for asking us to do math, but you're saying Nick Nolte was born when?
Andrew Walsh
1941. So just relevant. Up to 42. Wouldn't 42 to 2002 be 60 years? I'm so nervous right now. I hate doing math.
Luke Burbank
No, but I think you. I think you've gotten it, and I think you've also.
Andrew Walsh
61 years old. And he's looking good for 61.
Luke Burbank
He looks great for 61 also. I'm glad he's not like 48 in this.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, I'm 49. I'm the. You know what? This is the spicy. What are you covering? The spicy Chipotle. Hot take of the day.
Luke Burbank
Viet Cajun.
Andrew Walsh
Viet Cajun. The hot take is this is actually a good photo of Nick nolte. He's fully 11 years older than me
Luke Burbank
in this solid jawline.
Andrew Walsh
Solid jawline. He's in shape. He's got a fun loving shirt on, and he's got an admirable amount of hair on his head.
Luke Burbank
The quote that he gave to People magazine regarding the mugshot was, I looked like an asylum inmate. Out for a lark.
Andrew Walsh
Out for a lark.
Luke Burbank
I've never heard lark used in that way. But you know what? Allowed. No, you're absolutely right.
Andrew Walsh
Oh, reckless driving. Okay. So probably.
Luke Burbank
Let's be honest, it was probably a wet reckless. He probably pleaded down.
Andrew Walsh
It's always the pch. It's always the PCH with these guys.
Luke Burbank
Let's see. Oh, wow. Okay, let's see. Nolte drove to. Not long before the arrest, Nolte drove to an afternoon Alcoholics Anonymous meeting at a church near his house and felt the intoxicating effects of the psychoactive drug. So he had taken ghb. A strong dose made me feel great. Yet I know I was repeating with GHB the addictive cycle I've been in before. Okay, so this is Nick Nolte telling People magazine he apparently was in sobriety for alcohol, but he was taking something called GHB and had probably told himself, well, this is part of my workout. But as he also admitted, he probably was also getting kind of looped on it and shows up for his meeting. Realizing he was in no shape to attend the meeting, he drove off. I was a mess. And driving on the pacific coast highway, he writes, I'm told six drivers called 911 to report a big sedan weaving on the wrong side of the road. After his arrest, he was sent to a nearby hospital for blood tests. And a local police officer asked if he could snap a photo of the wild haired Nolte. I said, come on, you don't really want to ask that, do you? Nolte told gq he finally agreed to let him take the polaroid if the officer promised to share any cash he made from it with his fellow officers. Boy, that's not the negotiation that I thought I was going to be reading about. So Nick Nolte. So this is not even an official mug shot. Which, by the way, kind of makes sense.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, where he's not in front of
Luke Burbank
one of those, like whatever the backdrop of a mug shot is. He's just standing in like, I guess the police station, but like almost in a doorway.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. Kind of in front of a cinder block wall with a doorway in view
Luke Burbank
kind of partially in the shot. Like, this isn't where they stand people up for the mug shots. It's like a cop came up and said, hey, Nick Nolte loved you in blue chips. Which, by the way, maybe wasn't even released yet. Can you tell there's. Well, how about this? This adds to the Nick Nolte lore. Wasn't he in a movie called down and out in Beverly hills where he plays a down and out guy in Beverly Hills, and kind of, again, the way they made him look in the movie was not dissimilar to the mug
Andrew Walsh
shot that I don't know. I'm looking at Beverly Hills. Unrelated, blue chips was out in 1994, so that's perfect.
Luke Burbank
So the cops has loved you in blue chips, Mr. Nolte. You look fully nuts right now. Could I take a picture of you? And nobody says, I don't think you want to do that. And he says, what if I. What if I made you an offer and Ulti goes, what's the offer? He goes, well, you know, you support law enforcement. He goes, I back the blue all the time.
Andrew Walsh
He said, what if I read hard? I think he said, what if I
Luke Burbank
agreed to share the profits of any profits from this photo with the rest of the police? Absolutely. That sounds like a great deal. Where should I stand? So the financial agreement around the photo was you could take a picture of me if you promise to share the proceeds of this picture with the other cops.
Andrew Walsh
So first of all, down and out in Beverly Hills seems like my kind of movie. How have I never seen this? A 1986 comedy starring Nick Nolte, Bette Midler, and one Richard Dreyfus. Oh my God. This is totally my of sliding down
Luke Burbank
the chair on Bill Maher conversations.
Andrew Walsh
That's right. This is pre sliding. I'm a big fan of you sliding down the chair.
Luke Burbank
I loved your work in sliding off of that chair while maybe high as a kite with Bill Maher.
Andrew Walsh
I love your work in sliding chairs
Luke Burbank
where there's like this question jingle all the Dreyfus.
Andrew Walsh
What would happen if you didn't slide down that chair? What would your life be like today? Musician Little Richard appears as a neighbor and performs Great gosh almighty during a party scene. By the way, that's in the. That's in like the establishing paragraph of down and out in Beverly Hills. They. That's not like deep into the article on Wikipedia. That's right at the top. Little Richard appears as a neighbor. Luke, do you know that there was a period of my life where every time I saw a limousine, I declared Little Richard to be inside of it?
Luke Burbank
And that was based on what an assumption.
Andrew Walsh
Uh huh.
Luke Burbank
And by the way, you know, it's. You can't rule it out. It's what they call a non zero chance.
Andrew Walsh
Exactly. And I feel like if I said that enough one of those times, I must have been right. Although it's a lot of those were probably in the suburbs of Cleveland. So maybe, I don't know, there's a Rock and Roll hall of Fame in the neighborhood. Maybe he was in one of those.
Luke Burbank
You know that that ups the chances. Not a great deal, but to some degree.
Andrew Walsh
To some degree. Oh, look at that Stretch Hummer outside of the Applebee's in Westgate.
Luke Burbank
Good golly Miss Molly.
Andrew Walsh
These apps are never ending.
Luke Burbank
Down and out in Beverly Hills. It's a comedy starring Nick Nolte, Bette Midler. As we've already mentioned, Richard Dreyfus about a wealthy, dysfunctional Beverly Hills couple whose lives are upended when they rescue a suicidal homeless man from their swimming pool. The film. This is where it gets interesting, Andrew. The film, based on the French play Baudu Saved from Drowning, explores class and culture. Classes clashes as the drifter Jerry, played by Nolte, disrupts the family's superficial life, leading to humorous and chaotic results. It was notable as the first R rated film released by Disney's Touchstone Pictures. Interesting to me that it's based on a French play.
Andrew Walsh
I know, I was looking at that too. But I did have the cajones, which is another French term, to actually try to pronounce the French.
Luke Burbank
Well, I'm not saying I did that correctly. Yeah, but so. But I do remember being a little thrown when Nick Nolte, who in my mind I associated with. And I don't. I've never even seen that movie. But it was one of those, like I'd see the VHS of it in the, you know, when I'd go to rent a movie at Craigen's Pharmacy or shop and save. So it loomed large in my mind. Nick Nolte as kind of bedraggled guy in film. And then one day you see Nick Nolte as actually bedraggled guy. You know, it's, it's, it's life imitating art imitating life imitating down and out in Beverly Hills.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. I wonder. It says that he's in a pool at the beginning of this and it sounds like they kind of save his life. I wonder.
Luke Burbank
Well, it sounds like he's trying to end his life in the swimming pool.
Andrew Walsh
Right. And I'm wondering if they.
Luke Burbank
Tough way to do it.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, Yeah, I would guess. I mean, deconstruct that, I guess.
Luke Burbank
What's that?
Andrew Walsh
I guess a little early in the morning for me to deconstruct ways that you would maybe accomplish that, for lack of a better word.
Luke Burbank
But swimming pool probably not the way.
Andrew Walsh
Right. Or if you were using the swimming pool ways, you could. Whatever. My point is, I wonder if they do.
Luke Burbank
You're a problem solver by nature.
Andrew Walsh
I want to troubleshoot this.
Luke Burbank
Like you like to troubleshoot audio issues sometimes on the show.
Andrew Walsh
Exactly. But anyway, I could see it opening as a. With like a sort of a tribute to Sunset Boulevard. Right. Because that begins with a body in a Sunset Boulevard. Yeah, Sunset Boulevard. That begins with a body pool. Right.
Luke Burbank
You know what? I hadn't thought about that.
Andrew Walsh
Beverly Hills, Sunset Boulevard, a nice little.
Luke Burbank
A little subtle piece of filmmaking of illusion. When's the last time you saw Sunset Boulevard?
Andrew Walsh
It's been a little bit. Now it's a movie that I've seen more than once now. It doesn't mean I've seen it a million times. I've seen it at least twice. And so it's not one of those movies that I saw once. And I have a very vague memory of generally liking, like, I remember some things about it and I remember very much liking it. And I think that I should probably watch it again. I probably do.
Luke Burbank
It holds up. I feel like I watched it maybe a year ago and I've probably seen it. I'd say that maybe was the third time I watched it all the way through. It is. I mean, it's a really, really well made film. By the way, on the subject of old Hollyw, I could. And I don't have my email right in front of me, so apologies to the listener who clarified this. But the other day we were talking about stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame and I just sort of quickly threw out a Lorna Luft reference because that just about like, oh, you know, it's by Lorna Luft's star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Oh, by the way, it's listener Jim. I got here. Thank you, Jim. Lorna left and you said, who's that? I said, oh, an old Hollywood starlet. Not true. Lorna left is still alive and is, I believe, according to Jim. Oh, that's a good name for a show.
Andrew Walsh
According to according to Jim. Now, I don't think so. I mean, maybe if you're gonna put it on like a, like an indie kind of buried on some sort of indie cable network or something.
Luke Burbank
Okay.
Andrew Walsh
But definitely.
Luke Burbank
Sure. Maybe Adult Swim. Make it a cartoon.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, maybe something like that.
Luke Burbank
Lorna Luft is Judy Garland's daughter by Sydney Luft.
Andrew Walsh
Okay.
Luke Burbank
And Liza Minnelli's half sister. Okay, wait, I don't understand that. Oh, I see. Is the half sister of Liza Minnelli and is alive and working. So apologies to Lorna Luft. For me, it just doesn't just sound. I should have gone with Mary Pickford. That's just an easy go to if you want, you know, old Hollywood starlet kind of a thing. But Lorna Luft, doesn't that sound like, you know, she would have been the, you know, the queen of the silent film or something or early talkies or whatever.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, I had never heard that name before. So definitely I associate it with that because of your first reference, but also does sound that way. I'm a Little bit. This is where I get really, really confused about sort of those Hollywood dynasties, for lack of a better word. Because I'm looking at Lauren. Is it Lorna Luff? Like, kind of overview here on Google. And I'm seeing, like, the movies that pop up right away is she was in a 1972 movie called Liza with a Z. And so that's clearly about Liza Minnelli. Why was she in this? Is it a documentary?
Luke Burbank
Or maybe it's a documentary or she was. Yeah, probably a documentary. And so she was probably just a little kid.
Andrew Walsh
No, it's a concert film. I see. It's a concert film. So maybe she joined her on stage. But then she was also in the Judy Garland Christmas show. So Judy Garland is Lorna's mom. That's what you said, right?
Luke Burbank
Yes. Okay. According to Jim.
Andrew Walsh
According to.
Luke Burbank
That's what we're here.
Andrew Walsh
I'm starting to warm up to that concept.
Luke Burbank
Huh?
Andrew Walsh
What if we put.
Luke Burbank
I wanted to clarify that just since we're talking about, you know, since we're talking about old Hollywood, and I. I hate it when I. I try to make a joke or a reference or throw something out and be all cool like Lorna Luft, and then I'm just wildly off. It bothers me. But I do feel that I need to, you know, I need to correct the record. I need to give Jim some credit. What is the name? Why am I doing this? What is the main character's name, though, in Sunset Boulevard? Her name. Is it Gloria Swanson? Is that the actor, the actress?
Andrew Walsh
Hold on, let me see here.
Luke Burbank
I'm trying to remember what.
Andrew Walsh
The name Gloria Swanson. I don't know this off the dome, by the way. I'm going to the Internet here. Gloria Swanson is the actor and normal. Desmond is the name of the star.
Luke Burbank
Norman Desmond is the name of the character. You know, basically, she's this. She's this, you know, faded Hollywood star who's living up in this mansion in this kind of, you know, sort of delusional world where she thinks her career is about to take off at any moment. And famously, that's. I believe I'm ready for my close up, Mr. DeMille.
Andrew Walsh
Does she.
Luke Burbank
That might be one of those, like, you know, Luke, I am your father deals. Like, I wonder if she even actually says it in that way or. Play it again, Sam.
Andrew Walsh
It's in there, though, right? I don't think that's okay. So I don't know for sure, but.
Luke Burbank
And she's saying it to Mr. DeMille.
Andrew Walsh
I don't know who she's hanging to. I can only picture her right now on the staircase, coming down the staircase in a sort of.
Luke Burbank
It is really a master class in scary eye acting.
Andrew Walsh
Yes, it really is. Because she's got that eye makeup on, that sort of enhance.
Luke Burbank
And the tilt back of the head and the looking down, the looking from the eyes, it's like. It's almost like I can't raise my eyelids, there's so much makeup on them. But what I can do is tilt my head back and look out from under the eyelids. And that is somehow extremely unsettling.
Andrew Walsh
So let's see here. So what happens is. I mean, this is huge spoiler alert territory for people who haven't seen the film. So I'm gonna just pause here for about two and a half hours, it turns out.
Luke Burbank
Yeah, give it about five seconds and then we'll say spoiler alert. She's not ready for her close up.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah. So it says the flashback ends. I don't know what flashback that is. And the film returns to. To the present day with Norma about to be arrested for murder. I think she might actually deliver that line on the stairs. The mansion is overrun with police and reporters with newsreel cameras, which she believes are film cameras. So she's living in this delusion. They're there to arrest her and news cameras are there. Max pretends to, quote, direct her, and the police play along. As the cameras roll, Norma descends the grand staircase. Upon reaching the bottom, she stops and make an impromptu speech about how happy she is to be making again. She then says, all right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close up. And approaches the camera. She. We were. All right. She was on the stairs. That's how I was picturing her. But that's sort of like a. That's kind of a. Would you call it a light motif? I don't know if I'm using that word right, but I feel like those stairs, you know, Luke, I consider those stairs to be a character in the film themselves.
Luke Burbank
I do, too. I consider the swimming pool to be a character in the film.
Andrew Walsh
I consider that cup of coffee, the one guy drinks. Oh, that champagne flute. That's a character. A lot of characters, huge cast.
Luke Burbank
You know, speaking of the glasses that we drink out of. Andrew, I'm glad you brought me to this very important point on this Tuesday morning. It is Tuesday, right?
Andrew Walsh
Yeah.
Luke Burbank
I'm in the right place.
Andrew Walsh
It's Tuesday the second, by the way. How sweet is that? Monday the first. Tuesday the second.
Luke Burbank
Well, you had A Monday the first too. So you're. Everything's coming up Milhouse for you this week. You're gonna be, you're gonna be loving life. I, I mentioned at the, at the top of the show that I'm kind of weirdly hitting a little bit of a wall from travel and stuff, which I kind of don't that often. I usually feel like I got a pretty resilient spirit, but man, oh man, today was a little tough to wake up. And the time zone shift, which isn't that extreme. It's two hours from Las Vegas, but I don't know. Anyway, I needed some coffee, but I'm also like trying to get ready for tbtl. And I'm trying to do all this research for my TV thing. And so I order a pot of coffee from the front desk and. Which felt like a real Hail Mary because this. I'm in a Westin. Room service has largely gone away except at very high end hotels. I don't know if you've noticed that in your travels or doing stuff with Genevieve, but it used to be that almost any hotel that you stayed in that was north of a Motel 6, there'd be one of those books like in room dining Options. Again, something I rarely avail myself of. But today I was like, the only way that I can get this coffee that I most desperately need into my system was, is to get it a pot brought up to the room while I'm doing all this other stuff. I don't have time to go down to the lobby. It's almost, almost exactly what we were talking about yesterday, how I like to, I'm ensconced in the room. So I. But there's, there's no evidence that they actually bring food or coffee to your room. You know, I mean, there's no, there's no QR code for a menu. There's no menu. And so I'm just like, okay. So I call, I hit zero on the phone. The person says, hello. I said, hi, can I, I need to order a cup or I need to order a pot of coffee to my room. And she goes, okay, we'll send it. And I go, do you want to know the details? Like, she goes, okay. And I go, well, it's for one person and can I have cream and can I have some? Splendid. She goes, okay. And then just hangs up. And I'm just like. That was like, did I even call the front desk or did I call something in the movie Brazil? Like there's again, there's, there's nothing Here that made me think they were actually going to bring a pot of coffee. And then the woman wanted no information from me about the coffee, like what I wanted with the coffee, how many cups I needed, like, you know.
Andrew Walsh
Well, it doesn't. The only reason it doesn't strike me is, I mean. And what I'm about to say might leave you feeling. Yeah, but I'm gonna get screwed on my specific, like, sugar substitute of choice, which has always made a journey.
Luke Burbank
But I was BYOs, my friend.
Andrew Walsh
But I, I. Would you watch your mouth? I don't know, just sounded dirty. I just sort of feel like, you know what they probably do is they probably have a pot of coffee on a tray with like four mugs and cream and sugar. You know what I mean? They probably just have a go to order. That's my assumption from what you've said, but I guess we'll find out how this unfolds.
Luke Burbank
Well, they don't have. That is the thing, because I don't even think there's a formal system. Like, Like, I think maybe just the people that work at the coffee shop are willing to bring coffee up or something.
Andrew Walsh
Okay, we're.
Luke Burbank
We're off grid here and. Because. Yeah, so usually in, in the past, if I've ordered coffee, if I'm in a, you know, in a nicer place, that's exactly what it is. There's a tray, there's a. There's a. The carafe of coffee. There's a nice little assortment of like the little, like, coffee cups that are, you know, that are porcelain or ceramic or something, and then. And then an assortment of additives. This was like a little. It is a, it is a carafe of coffee, but then it's like a, A little like if you were to go to Starbucks or something, and if you were to order. It's basically one of those cardboard holder things that has four slots in it and a little handle in the middle that's for just kind of like if you had a few different cups of something and it was this carafe of coffee, and then a, A little small coffee cup that's paper that's filled with half and half. And thank God I told them because this is clearly an improvised situation. And then some to go cups, some like paper cups.
Andrew Walsh
After I said mugs before, I was like, oh, I would imagine they just give you a stack of those paper cups. Yeah.
Luke Burbank
Yes. And this is the thing for me, the entire experience, plus this is costing me $20. This is a $20 coffee experience that I'm having as opposed to $5, you know, if I went down and got a cup of coffee or maybe even free if this place has one of those lounges, I don't know, I haven't explored it. I got in at 2 in the morning but so now I'm like, well, a couple things. One very nice young woman bringing the coffee knocks on the door. I open the door and I'm immediately terrified because I need to get this coffee from her. Put it down sign for the thing. The really only convenient way for it to happen is for her to step into the room. But I am wildly uncomfortable in those situations as you know, like I do not want this person who works here to feel in the slightest way unsafe, menaced anything. And so I am like holding this very heavy door open with one foot, like to the max it will go. I'm avoiding direct eye contact, which by the way probably creepier. But I am trying to everything in my power for this young woman to understand that I come in peace. She is. I'm not trying to let the door shut, which again if I were in her shoes would feel very unsafe to me. You know what I mean?
Andrew Walsh
I'm just like, you're kicking your Dominique Strauss con book under the bed so that she doesn't see you reading this.
Luke Burbank
But I read it in the original French by the way Andrew, because I feel like it lost something in the translation. I am just like, I am just like, for some reason I'm like, this is what's going through my mind. Why are we sending a 23 year old woman on this particular assignment? Which again, 23 year old women should be able to do any job at a hotel. But I'm just immediately like, I don't, I'm like, I know that I am safe with this person, but is this person safe with every room service delivery that they're doing? And also she just like stepped right into the room. And I was like, I don't think you want to do like again, you're in no danger from me. But I think we should have like a lot of places there's a whole system where the person will knock on the door and this is regardless of their gender, the door will open. I've seen places where they'll put a doorstop down on the door or they'll even have one that goes in the kind of crack of the door between the door and the door jamb. Basically like there's a thing where like this door is not closing or I'm pushing this cart in and it's keeping the door open. And I'm standing in this place, and there's like a whole system. In some places, this seemed to have none of that system. And all I could see was like. Or all I could think was like, I am not a weirdo, but I really think you should have your head on a swivel when coming into people's hotel rooms. So that was one part of my brain, but then the other was looking at these paper cups. I was like, this completely ruins the experience for me of the coffee drinking, because I drink coffee out of paper cups all the time. Not to brag. What. I don't get to do as much. And what feels special to me and Maybe almost worth $20 is pouring the coffee into a real coffee cup of some kind of putting in the half and half. Putting in the Splenda. Oh, by the way, it was not this. It's not real Splenda. I knew that right away. I could have. I would have bet you a thousand dollars that it was gonna be some weird other thing, which it was. Luckily, I have my own Splenda.
Andrew Walsh
By the way, Splenda's the yellow one, right? And. Wait, no, well. Oh, wait, hold on. This one of the. Yeah, it's yellow, right?
Luke Burbank
It is the yellow one, but that's a whole thing because there's lots of fake Splendas that now are yellow.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. But it's still sort of coated in that way. Right. Like, you have the pink one, which was Swee. And now there's a bunch of other generic sweet and lows, but they're all kind of like, sweet and like, somehow they stay in their lanes, even if they're not the top of the charts of that kind. Right. The yellows are still all trying to. Or they're using the same chemicals as Splenda.
Luke Burbank
I think they are, or they want to be. Yes, you're right. I think how it started was you had. You had Sweet and Low. You had.
Andrew Walsh
What was the blue one?
Luke Burbank
Yeah, yeah, that's the. There's the blue one, whatever that is. And. And I think that those brands. Those products probably thought, well, we have a strong brand and people like our thing equal.
Andrew Walsh
Thank you.
Luke Burbank
I looked it up, and so they were like, they're not gonna. You know, they're gonna stick with their color because they're like, we. We have a good product and people like it, and we want it to be quickly identified. Then Splenda hits the scene with their yellow, and it does Taste a little bit more like regular sugar in my experience. And so then you have this next wave of, of non Splenda products that are maybe similar ish to it, but not exactly the same in my experience. But they're all jumping on the yellow train. And when you're talking to or asking for Splenda from somebody who doesn't use Splenda, it's like they're all, it's all yellow. What's the difference? And I totally understand that perspective. And in fact those people are probably right. I need to just like stop consuming so much, you know, sucralose or fake sucralose or whatever this is. But I just knew for a fact that there was no way that was going to be legit Splenda. But I, I have my own. Anyway, I'm now looking at these paper cups and I'm like, I don't want to drink this coffee out of a paper cup because I paid a lot of money for it. And I'm all excited for the experience of, of fixing myself a nice little cup of coffee here. So I'm looking around the room and it's like there are a couple of like, I guess wine glasses, those kind of stemless ones, right. That are just like sitting on the, on the thing, whatever it's called. And I'm like, now I'm thinking, do I need to Google, can you pour hot coffee into a wine glass? What is the point at which a hot liquid will make a glass break? That's not really a hot liquid glass per se. But then I go into the bathroom and they have, I guess you'd call it maybe tumblers. What do you call the kind of glass that has a slightly thicker bottom?
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, that's what I, in fact, I thought that's what you were talking about at first. Yeah, like, I like those for like a cocktail sort of a heavy bottom glass. I know exactly what you're talking about.
Luke Burbank
So they have those in the bathroom and for, you know, your water when you're brushing your teeth. And that one has, it's slightly thicker. So it's, you know, because the, the wine ones are supposed to be kind of like, oh for, if you're having a pinot or something. It's, you know, they're, they're a little bit, they're not a full on Rydal, which is that like those really thin, very kind of like lovely glasses that are just trying to break if you look at them.
Andrew Walsh
Yes, we have some of those stemless very like the shorter ones for Red. The slightly taller ones for whites, and they're just like. Yeah, they're basically a punishment for Andrew in the waiting. Like, I'm just like. If I. You're right. If I pick one of those up even near the sink, it's gonna shatter.
Luke Burbank
But I do love the experience of having a glass of wine in them. It's almost like you're. You're barely holding anything. It's like gossamer wing, amniotic sack of glass that is surrounding your wine, and it's all fun until that glass is broken. All that is to say, I rolled the dice. I poured the coffee into the tumbler from the bathroom, and I will say I'm now finished the pot. I've got the third pour in there, and they've survived. They did not spontaneously shatter from the heat problem. So we're off to a good start today.
Andrew Walsh
Well, one thing I was going to say is I share that sort of concern that you have sometimes with the extreme temperature changes, especially when I'm washing my coffee carafe because I have a glass coffee carafe. But that's one thing to keep in mind. Glass can handle hot temperatures because a lot of coffee crafts like mine sit on a hot plate and have hot coffee made directly into them. And actually, the one I have is relatively thin. And. But I always get nervous.
Luke Burbank
Where did I get that from?
Andrew Walsh
I don't know. But I'm with you, though. Like, I. I don't know where we're getting it from exactly, but I. I understand that sort of notion you have. Like, oh, I got to be careful here with this because here's where I always get nervous is, like, on Sundays when I'm doing my volunteer thing, I'm making about four or five pots of coffee that morning. Like, one for me and Genevieve, and then, like, maybe four pots. I have kind of a small coffee pot. So I make, like, four pots of coffee and then pour each one into, like, a to go thermos pump thing that we take out to the. Take out to the. To the serve. Right. Anyway, all that is to say what I'm constantly doing is taking a very hot, steaming pot of coffee off of the burner, pouring it directly into this thermos, closing the thermos, and then what do I want to do right away is make another pot of coffee. But I'm always so scared that if I just put that hot pot, that hot carafe under cold water, I just assume it's going to crack. So far, it has not. But I'm always very careful to, like, get the temperature of the water coming out of my sink kind of tepid again, because I just have this weird feeling that, like, ooh, hot coffee pot under cold water. That's a dead Man's game. I don't know. Was that in a movie? Dead Man's Game.
Luke Burbank
Was that. Was that in a movie when we were kids? Why is it that you and I, at roughly the same age, have the same fear about. About hot water doing something, particularly hot coffee doing something to a glass cup that is not supposed to.
Andrew Walsh
I'm actually looking this up now. Dead Man's Game was a 1946 film from the golden age of Hollywood in which a man keeps.
Luke Burbank
Lorna left in that one.
Andrew Walsh
Lorna Luft is in it. She's playing herself. And a man keeps breaking Nick Nolte,
Luke Burbank
Lorna Love,
Andrew Walsh
and Bette Midler. And the man keeps on breaking coffee crafts when he's putting the hot coffee pot under the cold water. And apparently it leads to strife in the family. He ends up becoming institutionalized. I don't want to give. I've already given away the ending to one classic piece of cinema, so I'll leave it there.
Luke Burbank
We was hoping for some razzle dazzle. Razzle dazzle. That's right, man. Razzle dazzle.
Andrew Walsh
On your mark.
Luke Burbank
On your mark.
Andrew Walsh
Get set, get set. Now. Ra.
Luke Burbank
Ready?
Andrew Walsh
Ready, Go.
Luke Burbank
Everybody rattle dazzle. All right, let's thank some dazzling donors. These folks are donating dough to tbtl, and that's the financial model for this thing. We do the show, we ask folks who like it to voluntarily part with some money so that we can keep doing it. And somehow, miraculously, this has been working now for 4,000, 740. Well, not really, because, I mean, there was, I guess, maybe a hundred episodes or 200 episodes before this business model, but let's just say the better part of 4,700 episodes is because of folks like Barry fought in Seattle, Washington, AKA Broadcast Barry, AKA the coffee king of the Pacific Northwest. Although that understates Barry's many successful businesses and projects. Andrew.
Andrew Walsh
Yes. His business interests are sort of splintering out like a hot coffee carafe that
Luke Burbank
has cracked from the movie Dead Man's Game.
Andrew Walsh
It's a dead man's game. And that's. I mean, that's what they say at the end of the movie. I'm saying too much here. But it's like kind of. It's cracking outward and spreading like a. Like a tree branch or a.
Luke Burbank
It's incredible. Barry's. Barry's support of the show Barry's Friendship to Us. Barry's telling me what flights I could book on if I need to do a mileage run and get another 10,000 Alaska Airlines points before the end of the year to make sure I maintain my status. There's not much that our friend Barry doesn't know about and can't do. Barry says, since you already promote my businesses on the regular, I thought it would be fun to share the spotlight of a few fellow 10 owned businesses.
Andrew Walsh
What? What guy?
Luke Burbank
Absolute mensch. Absolute mensch Status number one. Keith Melton of Blue Dragon Wood is a Seattle based lifelong carpenter specializing in end grain cutting boards from simple, functional pieces of intricate inlay work as well as furniture, household items and custom projects. He offers free local delivery in the Seattle area and can ship anywhere. Check out Blue Dragon Wood.
Andrew Walsh
There you go. Checking it out right now. Beautiful stuff.
Luke Burbank
Also, Brian in Portland, this is our friend Brian Dast, I believe is an indie folk music producer who helps songwriters build high fidelity collaborative recordings with professional session musicians. Hear before and after examples and learn more@briandast.com and that's B, R Y A N D A S T E. We know Brian. We love Brian. Brian's done many a project for this show. Number three, Erica, a longtime TBTL listener, created Hand Basket Company during the COVID shutdown with her playful Gothic hand sanitizer and has since expanded into vegan lip balms, body wash, bubble baths, shirts, arts, crafts and jewelry. You can find her at Handbasket Co or on instagram@instagram.com handbasket co. I'm looking at this right now. What a. Oh, I remember.
Andrew Walsh
I remember this. Right? I remember. Yeah, I'm pretty sure that Erica wrote in about this back during the, during the pandemic. I remember this website. It's very gothic.
Luke Burbank
I'm very excited too that this is still happening for Erica. You know, I'm going to be honest with you. I didn't know that the gothic hand sanitizer market was going to. That it was going to, you know, survive the pandemic and the end of the pandemic.
Andrew Walsh
I thought it was about this bubble bath. What about Beelzebubelza Bubbles? Beelzebubbles bubble bath? That is.
Luke Burbank
Is that really the name of it?
Andrew Walsh
It really is, yes. And it's perfect.
Luke Burbank
Okay, that's a very good spoof.
Andrew Walsh
And I think Erica might do her own art. It's got a very, very cute little illustration of a little devil taking a bath. It's very sweet. And also I kind of associate bath Time with pandemic as well. I took more baths during the Baths. Baths, baths, baths. I took more of those baths. Bath. Cesar, Is that also. What am I thinking of?
Luke Burbank
Is that Balthazar?
Andrew Walsh
Balthazar. Is that a. Is that something from the underworld? I do think Beelzebubble bath is a bubble bath.
Luke Burbank
Incredible play on words.
Andrew Walsh
Absolutely. Did you take more baths during the pandemic? I felt like there was. We were stuck at home. Genevieve got me some bubbles. I didn't.
Luke Burbank
Because during that time, I did. I. Well, you know, maybe a little bit. I was also kind of moving during the pandemic. I was kind of like. I was at the Burbank. I was at Burbank Springs, but then I was down in Portland, and I don't think I even maybe had a bathtub in my apartment in Portland. I will tell you now, though, out at the Madrona Hill compound, I take a fair number of baths, at least in the. In the. In the colder months, because we redid this. What was the kitchen into this little bathroom. And I very intentionally wanted to have a freestanding bathtub. That was not the thing you shower in. Talked about this a lot. We had this at the Burbank. We remodeled a bathroom at Burbank Springs, and that was a revelation for me, I think my whole life in adulthood, every house I had ever lived in where I showered was standing in the bathtub. And then I wonder why I never wanted to take a bath. And it was because, well, I didn't feel like cleaning the bathtub right before I took a bath. And then we had a shower stall, and then next to it was a bathtub. And I was like, oh, this is incredible, because this bathtub is just mostly ready to go most of the time. And that really led to me taking more baths. And when we were redoing the bathroom, I think my dad thought I was a little crazy, because I was like, I need a bathtub in this bathroom. He's like, there's not really room for it. And what are you gonna, like, you know, be taking baths? And I was like, I am, Dad. I am. And, in fact, I have used that bathtub a lot, mostly to prove him wrong.
Andrew Walsh
What do you mean, a lot of photos? Look, dad, I'm using it. And I was like, okay, please.
Luke Burbank
I think he's got me blocked now because I've been sending them and getting no response. But, yes, in the wintertime, particularly if I've been out on some kind of a. Like, a jog, and it's cold and it's kind of Gotten into my bones a little bit to just. Or even by the way, if it's wintertime and I'm feeling a little under the weather for whatever reason, I'm really into taking a warm bath and staring out the window at the river. It's very, it's very relieving. Do you. Are you taking baths around your place?
Andrew Walsh
No, my bathtub is not very nice down here in the basement. It's kind of jack. Jacked up sort of.
Luke Burbank
Oh, you have a bathtub though, in your basement?
Andrew Walsh
Well, the kind that you're talking about though, it's a shower, bathtub situation, you know, and so you're right. Like I would definitely want to clean it. I now keep a. I mean this is sort of an extension of something we talked about the other day. I keep sort of a kind of an abrasive style sponge. It's actually a little cat's face. I think a listener may have sent this to me like five or ten years ago. And it's just been in sort of like an unusual corner of my bathroom cabinet for a long time. And I pulled it out and it's like a little, it's like one of those cutesy little sponges, but it's kind of like. It's like a cat's face sort of. And I was like, why don't I just keep this in the shower with me? And now I've kind of. Of taken to like every now and then like maybe like kind of cleaning. Cleaning the walls or the, the. The tub with it a little bit while I'm in the shower. That's a little bit different than what I was telling you about the other day. I just kind of keep it in there now. So I'm just trying to keep the buildup from building up and then having to clean the shower, like do a huge clean all the time. So I'm trying to keep it tidy, but it's just not a. It's. It's like the polar opposite of what you're. You, you have your, you know, Dwell magazine esque like bathroom that overlooks with your. Don't you have. Is that where you. Don't you have a special round window or something like that?
Luke Burbank
I do. Although that was mostly because I bought. That was because I bought the wrong sized round window. Like that wasn't the original plan for that. That area because I'm bad with measurement. I bought this huge round window that I was going to put in, have my dad put in, in one part of the house and then when it arrived it was like, what are you thinking? And there was no refunds. So I had to find another port window.
Andrew Walsh
That's not the window.
Luke Burbank
No, that's just on the door. That was intentional and actually measured out correctly. But this other big round window that I ordered, it was far too large for the place that I thought it was going to go. And so I had to find somewhere else to put it. So I kind of reverse engineered this whole thing. But yes, it is a fairly picturesque thing now with this big round window and a bathtub that you can stare out from and look at the river. I do like doing that. But mostly what I want to say is thank you to our friend Barry, AKA Broadcast Barry.
Andrew Walsh
Coffee shandies, folks. Do not sleep on these coffee shandies. Go to broadcast. He didn't promote his own thing, but it's broadcast coffee.com I believe. Right, let's see here, here. Because we have to actually shout out his actual website, right? Because I've been ordering some of those pre canned cold brews. They're actually not cold brews, they're iced coffee. But it's broadcastcoffeeroasters.com. i knew I was getting that address somewhat wrong. Broadcastcoffeeroasters.com or just Google Broadcast Coffee. It'll take you there. They deliver wherever you are. I assume within reason. And I'm telling you, it's summertime. You get yourself some of those canned cold coffees with some of those coffee shandies in the mix. It is heaven. That is. That is my definition of summer.
Luke Burbank
Now, Barry, thank you so much. We really do appreciate you, buddy. Maestro.
Andrew Walsh
On your mark.
Luke Burbank
On your mark.
Andrew Walsh
Get set, get set now. Ready? Ready. Go.
Luke Burbank
Everybody rattle. Settle. It's Kate Muller in Seattle, Washington.
Andrew Walsh
Oh, Luke, one second. I. Before you continue, I need to use the restroom. Is there a place that. Do you think there's a place I could use the restroom? Mine is occupied right now.
Luke Burbank
I'm. Let's see. Oh, oh, okay. Okay. Let's see. As the crow flies, I'm kind of in. The central question is how long can you hold it? I'm trying to think about the distance between you and Green Lake. Strength and conditioning. Would you say that's about a. Maybe a 12 minute drive for you?
Andrew Walsh
Drive? Yeah, I think that's almost depending on
Luke Burbank
the route you take.
Andrew Walsh
Actually, you know what? I passed by it almost every Sunday. Yeah, I. I'm actually, I think less than that. I think I. I think I. And I, I.
Luke Burbank
Well then you better go. Right now.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah, I'm leaving right now. Okay. You go ahead and read this message though.
Luke Burbank
Kate, of course and her husband own Green Lake Strength and Conditioning. Kate's message starts business boys. It's Kate, the person who owns the gym where you can poop if urgency strikes while you're running around Green Lake. As in previous years, I'm using this message for some self promotion. Normally I'm promoting our Seattle gym, Green Lake Strength and Conditioning. But this year we've added another gym to the family. Polaris Strength and Conditioning in Ballard. Are you kidding me? This is amazing news. Now I have a place to poop in Ballard.
Andrew Walsh
We all do.
Luke Burbank
My husband and I own the best small gyms in Seattle that welcome and celebrate all bodies, all people and all abilities. And we have coaches who can meet everyone where they are, fitness wise. I am about the furthest thing from a gym bro, as you could imagine. And I'd love everyone to experience the community acceptance and fun that I've found at our gyms. Do you know how far Kate is from a gym bro, Andrew? How far she went to Brown with our friend Television's Chris Hayes. And I only learned this the other day, as did you when our friend television's Chris Hayes sent us a picture. He said I'm with a 10 at the Brown reunion.
Andrew Walsh
And you pointed out that we've known Kate for a long time and never once has she casually dropped that in conversation the way we would had we those credentials.
Luke Burbank
I've been telling everyone that I know two people who went to Brown. That's how I'm now framing my whole existence is knowing Kate and Chris and also actually Kate Shaw as well. So I guess two Kates and a Chris.
Andrew Walsh
Oh, I love that.
Luke Burbank
I know who went to Brown.
Andrew Walsh
Two kids, Chris and a pizza shop is a great huh?
Luke Burbank
2 Kates of Chris in a bathtub. So yeah, Kate, that was amazing that Kate is so understated about these kinds of things that I had no idea that that she knew or at least was also attending Brown at the same time as our friend Chris Hayes. Here are the websites for these gyms that Kate and her husband now own. Greenlakestrength.com and polaristrength.com that is P O L A R I P O L A r I s strength.com back to TBTL. I've been a dedicated daily listener since Eli Sanders 2008 stranger piece. I honestly don't know what my life would be like without tbt. Love you guys. Power out. Signed Kate. Reminds me, I gotta look up Eli. I gotta send about every Four years. I send Eli a random email going, thank you so much. Yeah, thank you, thank you, thank you for, you know, for writing about our little show in the Stranger and getting the Kates of the world to. To check in on us and see what this is all about. And here we are almost 20 years later. So, Kate, thank you so much, everybody. Check out Green Lake strength and conditioning and Polaris strength, not just for your bathroom needs, but also for your moving in your body needs, which also sounds like going to the bathroom.
Andrew Walsh
Here I go once again with the email.
Luke Burbank
Every week, I hope that it's from a female.
Andrew Walsh
Oh, man. It's not from a female.
Luke Burbank
All right, Lee, email or V mail? As we're wrapping things up today, I've gotta head across town to Houston. Here's one thing I'll tell you about Houston, Andrew, in my short experience here, but I've been here a few times, nothing is close to anything. Like it's. There's something with the design of this city. And again, I think it's a cool city. I like a lot of the stuff that goes on here, but it's like somehow everything is a minimum of 40 minutes from everything else. I think it has this kind of beltway thing, like, sort of like they have in D.C. where you've got the central part of the city and then you get this big, big freeway ringing it. And somehow I'm always on the wrong side of the loop of the freeway of where I'm trying to go. So I need to ski daddle here pretty quick is my point.
Andrew Walsh
All right, well, here's what we're going to do today. This actually kind of works out well because, as you know, I've been going through the TBTL voicemail line. I kind of hadn't checked it in a long time. So I'm still playing catch up. And about a month and a half ago, and I'm realizing this now, it's kind of funny listening to the voicemails on the voicemail line. It's sort of a way of clocking where we were in our lives because. Because I've apparently just gotten to the parts of the voicemails where I brought Lucy home for the first time. I heard a voicemail this morning from, I don't know, mid last month that said, hey, I heard you're looking for dogs. Here's some advice. And then the next one was, hey, I heard you brought a dog home. And this is a story from listener Bri that she wanted to share because right around the time we brought Lucy home. She had lost her dog of many, many years, and she wanted to share some memories with us. But here's the deal. I'm listening to the story at the kitchen counter today and thinking, how am I going to play this on the show and then have you and I react to it because it is such a sweet, sweet story, but it also left me feeling very choked up, and I'm like, I can't play this voicemail. And then talk after the voicemail. I will be too choked up.
Luke Burbank
Is it about dogs and trees?
Andrew Walsh
It's about dogs staring at trees that they remember from their young. Oh, yeah.
Luke Burbank
That's a lot.
Andrew Walsh
It's not macabre in any way. It was just Bree saying, hey, your stories of bringing home a puppy reminded me of when we brought our puppy home many years ago and we just said goodbye to that dog recently. See, I'm already getting choked up. So what we're gonna do is I'm gonna just play the outro music. Let's get out of here, you and I.
Luke Burbank
Yes.
Andrew Walsh
And close out the show with our dignity. And then I will play Bree's voicemail, which is a couple of minutes long, and then you and I can cry silently.
Luke Burbank
Well, what I'll do is I'll listen to this later, and then tomorrow, if it comes up again, we could weigh in on it.
Andrew Walsh
Yo, there. Somebody let a dog into the hotel room here. Fake dog. Don't try to fool me. I'm a dog expert now. I could tell that's.
Luke Burbank
Yeah, you are.
Andrew Walsh
Yeah.
Luke Burbank
All right, thanks for listening, everybody. That will bring us to the end of. Well, at least Andrew and I is part of the show. But stick around to hear listener Bri talking dogs. And. And then we'll be right back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio. I'll have a full report on Viet Cajun cooking and everything else fun going on in Houston, Texas. So please do join us for that. In the meantime, everybody, have a great rest of your Tuesday. Take care of yourselves. Go Mariners. How will they walk them off tonight? And please remember, no mountain too tall.
Andrew Walsh
And good luck to all.
Listener Bri
Hi, this is listener Bri in Columbia, South Carolina. I have just started listening. You just learned about Lucy. I'm so excited. Congratulations. I just had to share some memories we lost me and my husband's first dog of our own this last November. Delilah. She was the greatest dog. Still. Still getting over this. Getting not over it, but grieving with it. But she was 16 years old, and she was a pit mix. But listening just to the very beginning. Stories of Lucy are just bringing back such wonderful memories from when she was a puppy. We found her when she was 12 weeks old on the side of the road like Andrew found his cats growing up and she was an emaciated 12 pound puppy. She grew into a 70 pound best behaved dog in the world. But I had not crate trained a dog before and I was so so so die hard on her sleeping in the bed with us that we were 19 years old and it was our first dog and we didn't do nearly as much research or any but I actually got to the point because we didn't want her to pee in the bed and she would jump down and go pee on the floor that I would tie a string to my wrist and to her collar so when she went to jump down off the bed that it would wake me up and I could run her outside because I wanted her to sleep in the bed with us that much. And until she had harder times getting up into the bed last, probably when she was 15 and a half, she slept next to me in the bed long ways under the covers and I just look forward to the memories that I'm going to be thinking of as I hear about all these Lucy stories. I just want to thank y' all for helping me just remember Delilah and I'm going to try and email maybe a picture of her when she was a puppy and then when she was 16. Thank you all so much. Listening to TBTL has been been a huge, huge help and getting through some really tough days after we did lose her. But I can't wait to hear of all of Lucy and everybody's stories to come. Thanks guys. Power out.
In this lively Tuesday episode, hosts Luke Burbank (broadcasting from a Houston hotel amidst emergency vehicle noises) and Andrew Walsh catch up on their travels and dive deep into a winding, friendly conversation full of classic TBTL tangents. Today’s talk covers everything from the trials of hotel coffee service and the perils of sudden software updates, to an unexpectedly rich romp through film trivia (especially Nick Nolte's mugshot and classic Hollywood) and fond listener memories of beloved pets. As always, the tone is warm, conversational, and gently irreverent, blending observational humor with affectionate asides and inside jokes.
On software updates:
“Riverside, in my not so humble opinion, doesn’t have the best record on usability when they do these updates.”
— Andrew, (05:02)
On mugshots and aging:
“The hot take is this is actually a good photo of Nick Nolte. He’s fully 11 years older than me in this.”
— Andrew, (10:34)
On classic cinema:
“It’s really a master class in scary eye acting.”
— Luke, (22:27)
On hotel coffee struggles:
“What feels special to me and maybe almost worth $20 is pouring the coffee into a real coffee cup of some kind…”
— Luke, (31:50)
On listener business generosity:
“Absolute mensch status.”
— Luke, (40:01)
On gym bathrooms as community service:
“Now I have a place to poop in Ballard!”
— Luke, (49:29)
On emotional voicemails:
“It is such a sweet, sweet story, but it also left me feeling very choked up…”
— Andrew, (53:49)
Listener Bri’s bittersweet memory:
“I would tie a string to my wrist and to her collar so when she went to jump down off the bed, it would wake me up and I could run her outside…”
— Bri, (55:28)
TBTL’s hallmark conversational style is on full display: cheeky, warm, lovingly meandering, and peppered with pop culture asides, self-deprecating humor, and a genuine sense of community and nostalgia. Even as they riff on minor inconveniences or classic movie lore, Luke and Andrew keep things relatable and inclusive, bringing listeners into the fold as friends and co-conspirators in the ongoing TBTL adventure.
This episode is classic TBTL—part podcast confessional, part pop culture tangent, rich with in-jokes and empathetic listener engagement. Whether you’re in it for the story of Nick Nolte’s mugshot, the trials of hotel coffee, or the emotional catharsis of hearing Bri’s dog memories, it delivers a quirky, heartfelt slice of TBTL life.