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- [00:00]
A
First of all, I love it. Quick question, though. Am I panicked about the fire or am I being brave for everyone else?
- [00:08]
B
The fire, it's.
- [00:10]
C
It's a fire sale. Oh, okay.
- [00:18]
B
I didn't. Well, let's give it a shot.
- [00:24]
A
Oh, my God.
- [00:25]
C
We're having a fire. Oh, the burning, it burns me.
- [00:31]
A
Evacuate all the school children. Ah. Oh, man.
- [00:37]
C
This isn't a fever.
- [00:38]
A
Zingra can't even see where the knob is. End scene.
- [00:48]
B
Um, would you like to try that a little simpler maybe? No.
- [00:56]
A
T T B T L
- [01:03]
B
guess what day it is.
- [01:05]
C
Guess what day it is.
- [01:07]
A
It's Friday, Friday Gonna get down on
- [01:11]
B
Friday Everybody's looking forward to the weekend. Sex, money, power, fire, choking, being dragged behind a speedboat. It's all the same thing. Please refrain from scolding us for our approach. Our approach is legitimate.
- [01:24]
A
That was great.
- [01:25]
B
That was good.
- [01:26]
A
You went for it.
- [01:27]
B
I appreciate that. What's that drop?
- [01:29]
A
That's like. You're doing a good job, sweetie.
- [01:33]
C
What you do is so important, sweetie.
- [01:36]
A
Have a good show.
- [01:36]
C
What you do is so important.
- [01:40]
B
Well, all right. Hello, good morning and welcome, everyone, to a Friday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be a too beautiful to live. The vibes will be the illest and the jams narradic. My name is Luke Burbank. I'm your host.
- [01:53]
A
I'm a professional. Look it up in the book.
- [01:55]
B
Coming to you from the Madrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia. Bring it back home, baby. Bring it back home. Nice to be back here on an absolutely beautiful Friday. The sky is blue. My bagel is Jewish. I don't know how that phrase goes. The river is placid. There are people gunk holing on the river, by the way. That's how we know summer is here. There's a sailboat that's been out in this little kind of protected area since last night, and we know that.
- [02:27]
A
Oh, ma pa.
- [02:29]
B
It's just beautiful. Summer times are here, as is episode 4748 in a collector's series.
- [02:37]
A
Let the fun begin.
- [02:38]
B
And we have a big announcement on the show today.
- [02:41]
C
Attention, Everybody.
- [02:42]
B
Madams and Ms. Waz big announcement about the upcoming TBTL a thon and our plans for that. It's gonna be a very fun week of hanging out together and keeping TBTL rolling. And, yeah, big news on that. First, though, we gotta introduce this guy, longest running cobra of the show, maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships.
- [03:06]
A
Two bros broin it up.
- [03:08]
B
He's Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my.
- [03:11]
A
Good morning, Luke. When gunk holding is the second most problematic thing that you say in an intro.
- [03:17]
B
The show is early. The show is young, my friend.
- [03:22]
A
Now, I have a feeling, based on what I know about you, you might want to explain why you were riffing on the.
- [03:29]
B
Absolutely not.
- [03:30]
A
The phrase that we were talking about before the show. Let me bring on our special guest,
- [03:35]
B
our colleague and number one New York Knicks correspondent, Mr. John Sklaroff to the program. Hello, John.
- [03:43]
C
My mayor Muslim. My bagels Jewish. My Saturday Night Live. Nick's in five. Let's go.
- [03:50]
A
That's what you were trying to say.
- [03:52]
B
Yeah, Yesterday I tried to riff on that, and I went with my banker's Jewish, which is problematic for so many reasons. John was in the soundcheck quick to remind me that it's. My bagel is Jewish, which I then was hoping that was equally racist to my banker is Jewish. But it's not. It turns out it's. It's not racist at all. It's just commenting on the fact that many bagels are, you know, come from, you know, sort of a Jewish culinary background. My banker is Jewish. Lot of problems with that.
- [04:22]
A
Well, the funny thing about it, though, is I like this a little bit, but you're like a lot.
- [04:27]
B
My B word. Something that was.
- [04:30]
A
Now you're saying my brain was doing yesterday.
- [04:32]
B
Yeah, well, B word. B words in Paris, like you said yesterday,
- [04:38]
A
you have this.
- [04:39]
B
You wouldn't stop saying yesterday on the show.
- [04:41]
A
This overwhelming drive when you realize you've sort of misspoken or something, and it lives so large in your head that. And we've talked about this on the show, I mean, for years now, you'll sometimes sort of just like, lean into it more and more because you can't get it out of your head. So then you keep, I don't know, restating it or Burbanking it, as it's sometimes been called. But what's funny is when the conversation was off air, yet you felt the need to Burbank it on air, it
- [05:07]
C
just sort of left even maybe.
- [05:09]
A
Maybe a few more question marks in the. In the listener's mind.
- [05:12]
C
It's the real my shirts are explain the situation kind of moment, you know?
- [05:17]
B
Yeah. I clearly have been processed. I told John I've been like, for 23 hours thinking about that and literally thinking, like, well, I don't know. Bagel's also kind of not okay. It's like, no, it's fine. Actually, what I said was not okay.
- [05:30]
A
You know, I'M blanking now because I'm putting myself on the spot and not coming up with anything. But it is my belief that I have at least one moment like that with every show that lives 24 hours. And even on the weekend, it probably only lives 24 hours. And then I move on. But, like, I wish I could. I'm sure there was something that I said in yesterday's show that lived with me as I went about my puttering day, and I'm sure there was. There's always one of those things. Mine tend to be less anti Semitic, but, like, generally speaking, there's always something.
- [06:03]
B
Right. You tend to be pretty Zionist.
- [06:06]
A
Anyway, what a funny show today.
- [06:08]
B
I don't. I don't. That makes me. Honestly, Andrew, that makes me. That makes me feel a little bummed for you because I have not enjoyed the last 23 hours. I do not ruminate on stuff I've said on the show. Generally speaking, it's kind of. It whiffs right out of my brain. Except that. And right when I said it for the rest of the show yesterday, I was like, I don't think that's how that goes. And then later, you know, I saw somebody saying some version of it or whatever, the right way, and I was like, oh, no. And then that's why I constructed this narrative where it was like, but also, bagel is not okay. So what I said was not okay, but bagel is not okay. And then literally, John's face appeared on Riverside and he said, my bagel is Jewish. That was the first five words out of his mouth.
- [06:49]
A
Really true.
- [06:50]
B
I will say this, like, I was hoping nobody noticed.
- [06:54]
A
It is fun to have the gang together, though. John, it's been a while since you've been on the phone.
- [06:58]
B
Welcome to the show, buddy.
- [06:59]
A
With us.
- [07:00]
B
Yeah, see you, man. How you feeling, by the way? About. About your Knickerbockers?
- [07:05]
C
I. On top of the world. Okay. Like, I. I'm 40. I've been, like, sentient for most of those years, and the Knicks fan for the. Pretty much the entire time I've been sentient. Right. And so other than a few years, like in the. In the mid to late 90s when the Knicks had work, a little competitive, more than lil. They went to two finals appearances, lost them both. This team's been pretty dreadful my whole life. And. And so it's like, I know. I know a lot of people out there. Andrew, I'm looking at you like, you're like, well, you're a Yankees fan, so you're. You you, you like, you know what joy is as a sports fan, but like, I'm like, I try to be a reasonable Yankees fan and so like, I don't, I don't expect my team to win every year. I don't like, have this air of arrogance, like, which I do think a lot of Yankees fans do have to be quite honest. And so like, it's like to have my team, this team that has been so bad for so long right on the precipice of like winning it all is like, it's like a few.
- [08:04]
B
It's.
- [08:04]
C
It's incredible.
- [08:05]
B
And you say that it's a bigger deal for you. Obviously the Yankees have won a bunch of World Series, but would you say like the Knicks winning the NBA Finals is a bigger sports deal to you than the Yankees winning the World Series?
- [08:17]
C
For me, yes. Especially.
- [08:18]
B
Cause as I'm getting older, my bakker is Jewish.
- [08:21]
C
I'm becoming more and more of a Knicks like a basketball fan the older I get. I don't know, like, I'm like, I still watch baseball and I'll roof of the Yankees, but like, I'm watching more and more basketball. And so like, yes, I also, I want to say this too, like, because I think it's been in, you know, you guys were talking about like this, not to dominate this the show from the start here, but like, you guys are talking about like the cultural zeitgeist of, of the Knicks and the spurs and Andrew, you're talking about you and Genevieve's experience with it. Like, people don't even care about basketball really. Or certainly the NBA. There. It's. I think there's a couple things that are really also a part of this too. One, the New York has the jets and the Giants. It has the Yankees and the Mets, but it has the Knicks. Right. Like, there's the Rangers and the Islanders, but it's the Knicks. And like that's a unifier for New York City.
- [09:05]
B
They're the only one that plays in Manhattan too. Of the, of the teams you've mentioned too, which I feel. Right.
- [09:09]
C
Yeah. Of the teams I mentioned, that's still the Rangers. Rangers are also.
- [09:12]
B
Oh, the Rangers. Yeah. I'm not a hockey guy, but.
- [09:14]
C
But yeah, like, I mean, they are. New York City's like New York's team. Right. In a way that none of those other teams are. And, and so like, that's unifying the, the city and the, and the state. You know, fans.
- [09:26]
B
Yeah. The watch parties and you know, are just so joyful.
- [09:30]
C
You just wouldn't have that, I think, for, like, necessarily any of the other teams. And the other thing, too. And this is like, not to get, like, political or whatever, but, like, I definitely been having, like, this FOMO of, like, being from New York and, like, watching the Mandani stuff happen, and, like, people are so joyful.
- [09:44]
B
Did you see that clip of him in the bar?
- [09:46]
C
I've seen.
- [09:48]
A
That was a dumb question.
- [09:49]
B
Have you seen it, Andrew?
- [09:50]
A
No, I haven't. Tell me, Mom.
- [09:51]
B
Donnie just like, slipped into a bar. This is for. For game four. And just like, when that. When OG puts it back, they just. Somebody just, like, pans their phone to Mamdani just in the background of a very regular ass bar, freaking out.
- [10:05]
A
Oh, that's so great.
- [10:06]
B
Awesome.
- [10:07]
A
And putting the game on all the kiosks and everything around the city. I heard about that. Like, yeah, that's. Yeah, I've been thinking about that a lot. About. You just said you don't want to get into politics, but somebody was posting something about, like, something another politician was doing, another Democrat. But they were just saying that, like, this isn't it, man. The joyful. The joyful liberal ness of Mom Donne's. New York is where it's at. Like, that's. That's the message. That's the future. Yeah.
- [10:36]
C
Yeah. And that's exactly what I was getting to, Andrew. It's like. It's like, this is like the FOMO I have where. I love the Twin cities, I love St. Paul. I love being here. But, like, there is. I'm watching from afar, this place that I have so much love and appreciation for. Just be so celebratory about, like, people, like, everyday people are being helped by these policies. They're, like, fixing the problems of the city. And on top of that, this team that everyone loves is having this magical and, like, truly historic. I was listening to an NBA podcast yesterday where they're breaking down the numbers like this. This Knicks playoff run is, like, among one of the greatest of all time, like, statistically. And so it's like they are, like, having this incredible postseason in the backdrop of, like, New York is thriving and everyone is joyful. Like, that's the thing, man. And just.
- [11:20]
B
Well, except all of the millionaires have left New York. I mean, that's. That's the bummer.
- [11:24]
C
All the ones that were sit. Exciting.
- [11:25]
B
Exactly. There are no millionaires left in Mamdani's New York.
- [11:29]
C
Right. Right.
- [11:30]
B
Yeah.
- [11:31]
C
And so it's just like, I wish
- [11:32]
B
it wasn't happening against the spurs, though, if I can be real. Because Listen, I know you probably are now you've bought into this anti Wemby narrative. But like, Greg Popovich is a real one. Like, he's got good politics and like, and like, I love Tim Duncan. I love David Robinson. Like, Steve Kerr was a Spur. Like, I feel like the spurs are. And I love the city of San Antonio. I really do. Like, I wish they were doing this to Oklahoma City.
- [11:55]
C
So this is my one rebel to that because I agree with you on all that. Like, it's a, It's a well run organization. Pop is like one of the best coaches in like pro sports period history.
- [12:03]
B
Like, and people in my. And people, like, far away observation. I've never met him, but yeah, just
- [12:08]
C
seems to be like a great guy. And they've had great teams, but they've had, they've won five titles since 1999. When they beat the Knicks in 99. They've won four more after that. Like, yeah.
- [12:17]
B
And so, like, sure, they've had enough.
- [12:19]
C
And like, as a Yankee fan, I say it's like they've had their success. Like, I just enjoyed it.
- [12:23]
B
You know what? I wish it was the Lakers. I wish it was a team that
- [12:25]
A
I could, like, act.
- [12:26]
B
I can't actively hate the Spurs. I actively hate the Lakers, the Celtics, the Thunder. Celtics. Like, there are teams that I, that I, again, peace and love to people in those towns. But it's like, like the spurs are just. To me not. It's like the Mariners beating the Andrews National League. The Brewers. There we go.
- [12:46]
C
But the brewers haven't won a bunch of. If the brewers have won a bunch of World Series in recent years, you know, that's the.
- [12:52]
B
To me, it's. To me, it's not about how, you know, the rich getting richer. It's. But, but all that is to say, I'm very, very happy for your.
- [13:00]
A
What is it?
- [13:01]
B
All that is to say, that's our catchphrase.
- [13:04]
A
Put it on the bingo card.
- [13:06]
B
But no, I'm super happy for you, John. Again, thank you. And I didn't have the heart to tell you that I had a lot of money riding on that Monday night game against you. But. But then it was a perfect crime because the spurs won, I cashed out, and then I was full on Nick's head for game four.
- [13:21]
C
Talk about perfect crimes. I'd be happy to the detriment of the listeners to get into all the reasons why Game 3 was stolen from the Knicks, but we don't have to do that because that would be very boring and tedious and Very frustrating.
- [13:32]
B
I would agree that there were some questionable calls in that game.
- [13:35]
C
Some. I'm not going to get into it.
- [13:38]
A
I'm really. I'm really interested in my John.
- [13:41]
B
My John is bitter. Julio is a good hitter.
- [13:47]
A
By the way. I saw that Mina interviewed Julio for one of her. I saw that too.
- [13:50]
B
That was.
- [13:51]
A
But I haven't watched it yet. I'm sorry of saving it.
- [13:54]
B
It's really. It's really, really cute, actually, if I can say that.
- [13:56]
C
Yeah.
- [13:57]
A
John, what are your plans for watching the game? Literally, I'm excited for you. Like, I didn't real. I thought the game was tonight. You told me before the show that it's on Saturday. So now you have a whole nother day to plan for it. And like, you want. I don't know if FOMO is the right word for it, but, like, I almost like, was drafting off of what I presume your energy is. Because right now is the golden moment. Like, it's a weekend game that you can just spend your time planning for. What are you planning on doing?
- [14:21]
C
Honestly, like, just low key. Like, I'm gonna be in my basement probably with one or both of my dogs.
- [14:27]
B
Is this kind of like me in the super bowl in that I need to be. Although I wasn't for the last one. But I. Generally speaking, if it's an important game, I kind of actually don't want to be socializing. Socializing. I think Andrew and I have talked about this kind of Andrew Speed as well.
- [14:41]
C
Yeah, I. It's not. I don't think it's quite that level, Luke. Like, I know you've talked about that, but I think for me it's more like I definitely have friends I could watch it with in the Twin Cities or go to a bar and like, be a bunch of. Bunch of randos. But like, maybe it goes back to like, the whole, like, me having FOMO of like, missing. Like, I'm not in New York. Like, you know, and I feel like if I was around like a bar of Knicks fans. Hell yeah. And. And. But for me, like, I don't know, it's also different than the Super Bowl. It's not guaranteed the last game. Like, if they lose, they have still two more. Potentially two more games.
- [15:11]
A
Yeah.
- [15:12]
C
And so it's like, I just want to like, be in my own space. Maybe have, you know, a ham's beer or three or five, and the land of blue waters and, you know, and just like kind of like chill out and just like kind of enjoy it if it happens. If it doesn't happen. Like, okay, go game six, we go home and we clinch it there kind of thing.
- [15:31]
A
Which.
- [15:31]
B
Which in its own way would be pretty. Pretty.
- [15:33]
A
Yeah.
- [15:34]
C
I mean, I wanted to close it out. I want the spurs, like, because they're such a talented team. I don't want them to like, get any confidence. I know you're talking about. You're not pendulum Guy. I don't want them to feel like they can win it if they. So if they win this game, I'll not. I still think the Knicks will win it, but, like, I'll feel a little less good. So I just need them to go into San Antonio, take care of business and be done with it, like, kind of thing.
- [15:54]
A
So I didn't know that you're a basement dweller as well. So, like, what is your kind of. What is your basement? Like, what's the setup? And you mentioned that the dogs are down there. Like, I still haven't.
- [16:02]
B
Andrew, at some point we'll move back to the Midwest purely for rumpus room. Big Midwest basement. Guy.
- [16:10]
A
But I love the energy of the dogs being with you too. You know, I can't bring Lucy down into our. Into our basement space quite yet. And so I sort of don't have that. But like when you're watching a game that like, and you have a certain amount of energy, I imagine there are moments of frustration. You're yelling at the tv. I would assume maybe I have you wrong on that. Like, are the dogs kind of like getting excited? When you're getting excited, are you sitting on sort of a. Sort of a couch that has one arm maybe torn up a little bit? Is there a dartboard that is in a place that would be completely unusable?
- [16:40]
B
I have been hanging out and there is no chance of a torn up couch.
- [16:44]
A
Oh, no. It's really nice down there. Very put together, joint. Okay. It's. Well, I didn't mean to be insulting.
- [16:51]
C
No, it's. I. I'm sorry I let you down. It's not like a traditional kind of rumpus room in any way. It's just like we have like an L shaped couch and like facing the TV and some bookshelves and some other.
- [17:02]
A
How long would it take you to chew through the arm of like one of the arms of that couch?
- [17:06]
C
If I get Manon's help, probably pretty quick.
- [17:08]
B
And Benny, we'll see how Josh Hard is shooting.
- [17:13]
C
But no, I think as far as like my vibe, like, like so very, like a very common experience in our household, whether the. There's a game on or not is like, Jess will go upstairs and read in bed and I'll kind of like go downstairs and play some PlayStation or hang out or ever watch a game or something. And so, like, I was not freaking out because, like, the other night say I was not freaking out because one, the Knicks were getting, you know, just.
- [17:36]
B
Yeah.
- [17:36]
C
What was your.
- [17:37]
B
Can I just ask, John, what was your kind of emotional journey with that game for folks, for like three people who don't know, the Knicks had the largest comeback in the history of the NBA Finals. They were being decimated by the Spurs.
- [17:49]
A
Yeah.
- [17:50]
B
What was it? 29.
- [17:51]
C
29 was the biggest deficit and they were down 20 going.
- [17:53]
B
Were you like, did you assume at 29 that the game was over?
- [17:58]
C
I. I don't know. Like, do any sports fan assume their team is all forever? I mean, like, it's obvious because I didn't.
- [18:05]
B
I mean, and I'm a lifelong Knicks fan, obviously, but I was like, if they can get it. I kept thinking, like, if they can get it. I told you this in a text. Yeah, if they could get it to 10 at any point with like, more than seven minutes left, they've got a chance. And they. They kept not doing that. It was the weirdest comeback because it wasn't like they went on a crazy run. They were just chipping away in this almost imperceptible way until you look up and it's like, oh, my God, they're only down six.
- [18:32]
C
Yeah. And not to bore listeners who are not like, you know, doing so much sports talk already in the beginning of the show, it wasn't. It really was just like an example, classic example of youth first experience. So obviously neither of these teams have been as comprised now have been in the finals. And, you know, there's a couple players. There have to be some players who have championship experience. Now I'm thinking about, yeah, OG Anubi, like one with Toronto fears back. But he actually didn't play because he, I think, had ruptured his spleen. So he missed like that whole playoff run or something like that. But anyway, but like, it, you know, but the Knicks just generally are much older team been in the league longer and so. And the spurs shot themselves out of the game. Like, it was just like they. As much as it was the Knicks climbing back and chipping away. It was. The spurs gave it away, really. But so, like, I.
- [19:17]
B
It's.
- [19:18]
C
To answer the question of, like, I don't know, I just was like, I'm watching it. I'm texting with my Friends. Like, I have different, you know, threads going. I'm, like, texting my buddies, and, like, everyone's very bleak and dour, and I'm, like, checking blue sky. It's like, oh, this game's over. And then, like, just slowly, you're like, you know what? All right, they're only down 15, and there's, you know, 10 minutes or whatever it was. It's like, this is doable. And.
- [19:38]
A
Yeah.
- [19:39]
C
Yeah. So my emotions were like. I literally. I. I played. I had a softball game earlier that night. I get home, which we won, by the way, eight to three. I was two for two. No big deal.
- [19:49]
B
The tv chill. Senior sluggers.
- [19:51]
C
Yeah. I get home and, like, I'm like, right before tip off, so I watched the first half, and then I come upstairs at halftime to jump the shower because I'm obviously discussing. And Jess is like, how's it going? I'm like, oh, it's like, literally the worst finals game ever. And she's like, oh, I'm sorry. I'm like, yeah, whatever. Like, I get chained. I get showered to get dressed, and I go back downstairs, I put on one of my nick shirts.
- [20:10]
A
Nice.
- [20:10]
C
And then the Knicks proceed to, like, do this thing. So I went from, like, I. It wasn't like, acceptance, but I was just like, ah. I mean, obviously I'm gonna watch, but the chances aren't good. And then.
- [20:22]
B
Yeah.
- [20:23]
A
Yeah.
- [20:23]
C
It just progressively just got more and more exciting.
- [20:26]
A
How.
- [20:27]
B
How would you feel about your colleague Luke Burbank going to New York City next week and staying literally, at the Knickerbocker Hotel, possibly. Which is not at Madison Square Garden. It's in Times Square, essentially. But I'm going to be staying at the Knickerbocker Hotel next week in New York starting on Monday. And there is a very real chance that I might be there for a. I'm there till Thursday for a clinching game for.
- [20:50]
C
If they go back to game six.
- [20:52]
B
Do you want me to run around, like, with you on FaceTime? Can I.
- [20:56]
C
No.
- [20:57]
B
Do you want me to carry a laptop, like, Jen? Am I swearing in at the Eagles?
- [21:00]
C
Can you actually do this?
- [21:02]
B
Yes.
- [21:02]
C
Can you print out a picture of my face and wear it as a mask?
- [21:05]
B
Absolutely.
- [21:09]
A
Can you do me a favor and not do that? Yeah.
- [21:11]
B
But once I land, once I get to LaGuardia, I will put. I will don that and try to ban me. James Dolan.
- [21:20]
A
Yeah. With my scler office. Yeah. Wear that through TSA as well.
- [21:23]
C
True. Did not like that.
- [21:24]
A
See how that goes? Yeah. Just the actual Thought of that. Let me ask you guys one more question because you were mentioning how, like, if there was like a good Knicks bar that, you know, had all the energy would go there. What do you got? Keep in mind, I only really know
- [21:38]
B
I know where I'm watching it, by the way. The Knicks bar. I'm going to Jimmy's Corner Bar.
- [21:43]
A
Oh, nice.
- [21:43]
B
In Times Square. That's the ultimate place to watch it.
- [21:45]
A
Do you guys think basketball is the sport that is kind of the best to watch in a bar? Like, because I only know baseball and football, I think I would go out of those two. I'd probably rather watch baseball in a bar than football. Like, if I really want to see the game, I feel like it really benefits me to be, you know, in my own space watching it. I, I've, you know, watched both. But baseball, you can get away with more just having out in a bar. But I always see these shots of like crowds going absolutely crazy this time of year in bars. During the NBA Finals and during March Madness to a degree. Is. Is basketball the bar sport?
- [22:21]
C
I don't know if it's like, specific to basketball. I think it's more the situation because it's the finals. Like, I think people go to the bar. So I mean, well, Super Bowl, I guess it's like parties or whatever. But baseball, I, I don't know.
- [22:31]
B
Like, I think baseball doesn't feel like a, like a, like a bar sport to me. For whatever reason. I mean, obviously people go watch the game at bars, but to me it's like, I feel like football because it's so associated with. It's always on a weekend, generally speaking, and you know, drinking and like partying around the football game, it has a lot of energy. But honestly, like, again, John, I know you want them to just close it out in San Antonio, but man, dude, to be in Manhattan to be on a warm June evening. That's the thing too with the NBA Finals, if you think about it from a weather standpoint, and this isn't really answering your question, Andrew, about bar stuff, but just like, I feel like Manhattan, well, all five boroughs, maybe not Staten island, but all four of the five boroughs are going to just be an open air street party. Right? Do you think, John? Like, I mean, again, I hope for you that they close it out, but man, I'm not going to be sad if I get to be in Manhattan when they win this thing.
- [23:29]
C
I think you're right. I also think that's going to happen regardless. People are like, they're so celebratory over this and because it is like your summer. And again, back to New York being such a joyful place right now. And I should. Because just so no one sends me an email. There is another. Technically there is another NBA team within New York City. The Brooklyn Nets exist.
- [23:51]
A
How weird, by the way.
- [23:52]
C
Exactly. So that's.
- [23:53]
B
But that's so strange because I mean by the way they have a really sick facility they play at. They're in Brooklyn which is a cool place to be. You know what I mean? Like, wait a second, that was like.
- [24:02]
A
That's ours. Two basketball teams in New York after all of that?
- [24:07]
B
There's three actually. Well, there's the WNBA team as well.
- [24:09]
A
But I mean, yeah, technically.
- [24:12]
C
Okay, so here's the thing, Andrew though. There's the, the Nets. We actually, I think they started in New York back in. Way back in the day when they're in the ABA before there was the ABA NBA merger. Then they were the New Jersey Nets and they were the New Jersey Nets until the. The mid 2000s. Rip carry Kittles or maybe like 2000s. And so it's like they moved to Brooklyn and it's like Jay Z got involved and we're gonna be the cool.
- [24:36]
B
Which is.
- [24:36]
C
But it's like it's not a real thing.
- [24:38]
B
Which is the reverse. It's the reverse comments. Because usually what happens with pro sports as we're. I hope we're not going to see in Chicago right now with the Bears is it seems like the movement for pro sports team is from urban centers to like suburban and exurban places because they can build big stadiums and have lots of parking. And like you know, the Dallas Cowboys don't play in Dallas and obviously the, the Giants and the jets, they don't play.
- [25:01]
C
They play in Jersey.
- [25:02]
B
They don't play in New York City. So you have the Indiana, the, the deeply uncool New Jersey Nets. And by the way, Kerry Kittles is alive. I was just trying to make.
- [25:10]
C
Yeah, I was.
- [25:11]
B
But like the deeply uncool New Jersey Nets move to Brooklyn. They have a stadium, Barkley center in at the Atlantic street subway station and Jay Z is involved. You could not have a cooler thing happening. And I literally forgot for two years until you reminded me, John that the, the Brooklyn Nets exist.
- [25:31]
C
Right. Because the last time they were relevant as like competitive team, they were in the NBA final.
- [25:36]
B
Jason Williams was shooting Jason Kidd. Well, Jason Williams was shooting a limo driver.
- [25:41]
C
Oh, Jason. Oh, that. I think that white chocolate.
- [25:43]
A
Oh, that kind of.
- [25:44]
B
There's two Jason Williams is in the NBA. One of them shot a limo driver. The other one's daughter is an elite softball player.
- [25:49]
A
Yeah.
- [25:50]
C
You see that whole craziness.
- [25:51]
B
Yeah.
- [25:52]
C
Down in Florida, it's. I. Yeah, I. But they were less relevant. Jason Kidd was the point guard for the New Jersey Nets, and they lost in the NBA Finals.
- [26:02]
B
Oh, they went to the Finals.
- [26:04]
C
Yeah, they lost. They got swept, I think, by the. By the. Like, that was like, Kobe and Shaq, Lakers. So, like, they had no chance. And so it's one of those things that was the last time as a franchise, they were really relevant in the league. And then they kind of. Nobody cares about them. They go to Brooklyn, Jay Z, yada, yada. And, like, everyone's like, okay, because they're still terrible. They're still, like, a bad team. And so they just, like, they exist, but nobody. They're not. Like I said, the Knicks are like New York's team.
- [26:29]
B
Like, Brevin Knight was. Brevin Knight.
- [26:32]
C
Annette, probably he bounced around the. You could be thinking of Devin Harris. Not Brevin, but Devin Harris was. By the way, maybe Brevin Knight was.
- [26:39]
B
I don't know if you're old enough for this now, John. Crazy for me, when I learned that Dylan Harper is Ron Harper's son.
- [26:47]
C
Yeah.
- [26:47]
B
Like, I was like, why are they showing Ron. Ron Harper so much.
- [26:50]
C
Yeah.
- [26:51]
B
And then his brother. Oh, my God, his son is on. Like, pretty soon it'll be the grandkids of people that I watched.
- [26:58]
C
Yeah.
- [26:58]
B
You know, I mean, guys that were players of my era now, not only their kids are retiring. You know, I mean, like, they're. They're like, Tim Hardaway Jr. Is he in the league anymore?
- [27:09]
C
He is. I think he's with Dallas still. But, Yeah, I heard you're saying, like, Glenn Robinson the third is, like, around. Yeah, Andrew. Just so you know. So this kid, Dylan Harper, who's a rookie on the. San Antonio on. He's awesome. Like, this kid is going to be like. Like, he was the second.
- [27:22]
B
Did you see the look on his face when OG did the putback? Dude, that's. That is like. Remember in Princess Bride when they're trying to find Wesley and they hear the sound of eternal suffering or whatever it is, they're like, like. And Inigo is like, that is a man who has lost everything. That's the look on Dylan Harper's face when the putback goes in.
- [27:42]
C
Yeah. No, he's.
- [27:43]
A
He's.
- [27:44]
C
He's. He's very emot. Like, emotive. There's been several Times throughout this series where he makes very funny faces. But Andrew, just so you know, his played with Michael Jordan and like one bunch of titles he played in the league aside from that. And so now he's this like rookie phenom for San Antonio. And it's like.
- [27:59]
A
Yeah.
- [28:00]
C
Is a mark of gang old for sure.
- [28:01]
A
Well, I've been doing, they've been doing some research over here. There are no good options for a Knicks bar in the Twin Cities. Sorry. I really thought I was going to be like. Well, I mean. No, I mean, I'm just googling while you guys are talking. There's a lot.
- [28:13]
C
Yeah.
- [28:13]
A
Some people are going to Tom's Watch Bar, which I didn't realize.
- [28:16]
C
Yeah.
- [28:16]
A
That's a national chain because I think
- [28:18]
B
I went turn the Nook into a Knicks bar.
- [28:21]
A
Yeah.
- [28:23]
C
Yes.
- [28:23]
A
That's what I was gonna say.
- [28:25]
B
The Canuck.
- [28:26]
A
Yes.
- [28:27]
B
Like Taylor Swift, Joe Mauer once hit a home run off the building.
- [28:31]
A
Yeah, it was definitely. Yeah, it was definitely Joe Mauer. I'd bet.
- [28:34]
C
Yes.
- [28:35]
A
Everything on that. I would bet everything.
- [28:38]
C
No, I, I, I could definitely. Every bar I'm sure will have the game on and like, like I could go to the bar, but it's like, I'll be like the Nick fan.
- [28:45]
A
Yeah. You want people. Yeah, that's what I was looking. Yeah.
- [28:48]
C
So if I'm not going for my. And I appreciate that, Andrew.
- [28:50]
B
Well, I promise I'll be facetiming you whether you want it or not. John, I actually was a little worried the other night when I was texting you at the critical moments of like, of that game of Game four, because I was like, you know, we don't really talk about basketball a lot. You probably have real basketball friends. We work together. I was like, I don't know if John needs me saying that, like, Josh Hart really missed the block out on that play. Was that annoying to you?
- [29:13]
C
No, no, but.
- [29:15]
B
Cause I'm very sensitive when I'm in like an intense sports moment as, as we talk about on the show a lot. Der says the wrong thing to me, I will drive to Seattle and fight him. So I didn't want to be adding to your anxiety when like, when the Knicks were in that kind of critical moment of game four.
- [29:30]
C
No, it's, that's what I'm saying. Like, it's not, that's why it's not like me with you, the Super Bowl. It's not the same for me. It's just like, I mean, I definitely get like, very into it and like, very emotional. Although, like, I Said like, because I thought Jess was upstairs sleeping, like, and I am a Non in the basement. I want her to freak out. I was like, yeah, like, doing a lot of, like, stunted yellow, you know, but she was jumping up every time I jump up.
- [29:51]
A
Because she's like, yeah,
- [29:55]
C
but so, like, I. No.
- [29:57]
B
How are the dogs handling it? Do they. Do they sense your energy?
- [30:01]
C
I think just during the game. Like, I think they. They just like.
- [30:04]
A
And they're Nick fans too. Are they Spurs?
- [30:07]
C
Yeah. I mean, they'll root for the wolves too, because the canine brethren.
- [30:11]
B
But kids like to be Rebels. Non is like, I am a Spurs fan.
- [30:16]
C
Oh, no, no, that would.
- [30:18]
B
That would not fly.
- [30:19]
C
I'd be in the backyard building a doghouse for her to sleep in.
- [30:24]
B
Well, congratulations again on all the success so far. And go Nicks and again, you know, love, love to our listeners in San Antonio. I said this the other day. It's like for every thrilling all time comeback, there is a depressing all time letdown. So I want to make sure that
- [30:42]
A
I hope we're not dancing on the only. The only spurs fan that I know of in our audience sent me a photo of him wearing actually a really cool Spurs t sh in an airport bar yesterday. And I gotta say, I was like, oh, wow. I really like that font. I could see getting into this team. But then I realized it was Sean, the Astros fan who texted me, go Astros. After. After they just. In the most painful sports moment of my life. Also, by the way, he texted me, go Astros.
- [31:10]
B
You have a team. They're called the Rockets.
- [31:11]
A
Yeah, it's true.
- [31:13]
B
Like, what is this guy with?
- [31:15]
A
Go niche is my point.
- [31:16]
C
Yeah, I'll say, too, as spurs fans, like, like, I'm glad you had Tim Duncan in five championships. Let me enjoy this. That's all I'm gonna say.
- [31:23]
B
Yes. Can New York finally get a W right?
- [31:27]
C
And the spurs with wembayaman, this young core are probably gonna win eight championships in the next decade.
- [31:31]
B
So, like, I heard someone call him Slenderman and I thought he may never recover from that.
- [31:37]
C
No, that's like, I think he embraces it. He wore Slenderman outfit one year.
- [31:41]
B
The last thing I'll say about this, because I. We should move on to our big announcement, which is exciting, but, like, it's really funny to watch the sort of like, life cycle of someone's image online when they're heavily in the public eye. And by that I mean the narrative on Wemby has been, this guy brings a book everywhere, like a physical book. He has really Good politics. He speaks multiple languages. He was in Central park drawing, Doing, like a pencil drawing of a statue or something the other day. Like, he's just.
- [32:15]
C
Yeah.
- [32:15]
B
You know. So that's been the narrative. But then it's like he pushes Brunson down kind of aggressively. He does some other stuff. He chokes. And then I'm hearing people say, like, it's also performative. Like him drawing a statue and him like, whatever. Like. And now it's just like, I see this sort of like, Wemby is. You know, he choked. And also, like, it's all. We get it. Stop carrying a book around everywhere. Like, it's performative wembiness. Like, it's so funny to see him
- [32:41]
A
go through the Man Inside Me.
- [32:45]
B
Do I have that?
- [32:46]
A
Because now, that is the book from Arrested Development.
- [32:48]
C
Which.
- [32:49]
A
Luke, you actually have a real prop from the set, right, which is. Is it a blanket?
- [32:52]
B
Somebody listener. It's the South Beach Diet. Is the actual book by coincidence or by whatever happenstance? Yeah. A listener who worked on Arrested Development in the props department brought me a copy of Tobias Funke's book the Man Inside Me, from the show that he was. I think maybe he's signing them or something. There's a bunch of them. So I had to basically create a number of these books. But of course, there's no actual book. So they were just. It was a book jacket and it's on the South Beach Diet. It's the book that's inside of the Tobias Funke, the Man Inside.
- [33:28]
A
That's what I want Wendy carrying around New York.
- [33:32]
B
That would be. That would be such a pull.
- [33:34]
C
I. I don't hate him. I think he's a good guy and he'll be really dominant for a long time, but he's playing dirty.
- [33:42]
B
That's one of your. That's one of your things that you'd like to take issue with about game three, I would imagine. But, hey, you know what? You guys got game four. That's awesome. And. And Go, Nicks. All right, my friends, let me just take a moment here to activate the official big news is about to happen on tbtl. Sound effect. We are going to be. I don't use the word conducting. That sounds too clinical. We are going to be celebrating the TBTL a thon 17, July 13th through 17th in Valley City, Ohio. You said it right as part of. I was tempted to say it wrong, but I didn't feel like this was the moment for it as part of. This is very real. The Valley City Frog Jump Festival where we Will be entering a frog and trying to win. I got a lot of money. I got a lot of Poly market where we will be entering a frog.
- [34:52]
C
Let's name her frog Kelshie.
- [34:54]
B
In the frog. We need to name the frog Kalshee. I think it's an early front runner for what we're naming the frog. We will be in Valley city, Ohio, taking part in the Valley city frog jump festival. And also, and this is maybe the most insane part of it all, Andrew,
- [35:11]
A
broadcasting from my former elementary school.
- [35:16]
B
So, folks, my pool, elementary school.
- [35:19]
A
So this is amazing sort of how this worked out. As we were talking about what we wanted to do with the THON this year, we were looking at our calendars, and I realized that I had mentioned growing up. You know, obviously I've mentioned a lot growing up in Valley city, Ohio, which is like a rural community, but I want to say about an hour south of Cleveland, and. And, you know, all of my childhood memories were made there. And I also have mentioned before that they have this thing called the summer frog jump, or I guess just the frog jump competition. And I grew up thinking it was the only. I mean, the motto of Valley City, at least, was the frog jump capital of the United States. So I grew up with a pride in that, Although I've never actually attended one of the frog jump competitions before. And so we were looking at our calendars.
- [36:05]
B
We're like, well, actually, this summer, we
- [36:08]
A
could do our usual week of special broadcasts. We'll stream them live on YouTube. We'll take calls, like we usually do all of that. And we can do it from Valley City in the week leading up to the actual frog jump competition, which would be on what? That would be Sunday the 19th. 19th. And so we'll be doing the show from Valley city, Ohio. And then as you were poking around, Luke, looking for places to actually set up shop for the week, you spoke to some contacts in Valley City, and they said, oh, yeah, we'll put you in the community center. And then we quickly realized that the community center is my former grade school, which I've always wanted to go back and see the inside of. I'm sure it's very, very different now because it does sort of serve a different community purpose. But, like, we're gonna be in one of the classrooms that I potentially had to put my head down on the table because we were being too rambunctious, and I could probably still smell that cleaning solution.
- [37:04]
B
Did you guys play seven up in Ohio?
- [37:07]
A
Yes, seven up, exactly. That kind of thing. I can still smell. I can still smell the desktop from. From that. Or did you guys have to put your head down also? Just as like a way of the teacher controlling the classroom from time to time. Like, you guys are too ramb.
- [37:21]
B
I don't remember that, but I remember it being when we would play thumbs up, seven up, or whatever we. That would be heads down.
- [37:27]
C
Yeah, heads down, thumbs up. That's exactly where I thought you were going with the two answer. That's my memory.
- [37:32]
A
Yeah.
- [37:32]
C
Putting my head on the desk.
- [37:33]
A
Ours was much more punitive.
- [37:35]
B
This is. This is exciting. But also, Andrew, I am. You know, you've said on the show before that, like, nostalgia is a powerful drug for you. We are like, I'm trying to imagine if we were doing this at. Listen, I've cried at sitting by a tree that I once planted. Like, if we were doing this at Daniel Bagley Elementary School, if we were doing this from the classroom where Mrs. Wharton used to give me detention and then eat an entire apple, including the core, while having unbroken eye contact, it would be a lot. We are going back to not just like the Cleveland area, which is very sort of associated with your childhood, but literally Valley City, Ohio. This is gonna be a lot for you.
- [38:16]
A
Yeah, well, I'm really looking forward to it. I mean, there's another layer of this, too, which we don't have to get into. I don't know how much it'll come up on the show, but we're staying in Cleveland right around the corner from my high school, too. And that's a coincidence, but we're staying kind of in that area. So also I'll be able to show you guys Dave Thomas Arena, AKA the parking lot behind the Wendy's where kids used to get in fights after school. And yeah, it's just going to be a lot of. I'm going to be able to show you guys a lot of the places where a lot of my stories are
- [38:46]
B
to be a journey into the sort of, like, origin story of you.
- [38:51]
A
Yeah, but we are literally going to enter. I was kind of like goofing on top of you while you're talking about this, Luke. We will be going out. So we have a couple of guys named Dave who are sort of our. Are guides on this journey.
- [39:04]
B
90% of the men in Valley City are named Dave.
- [39:07]
A
That's right. And so the Daves are going to be taking us out early in the week to catch our frog. So that's how it works. They go out. They get a bunch of people to go out, and you can either you can sort of adopt one of the frogs that they catch the night before the frog jump, or you can bring your own frog to the frog jump. And so the Daves are gonna take us out into the fields and bogs of Valley City, Ohio. I hear the golf ball Tuesday, where they get the frogs from the golf course is called the Pond and Bog golf course. So that's where I was.
- [39:42]
B
I don't want us to get a golf course frog because I feel like it's not going to.
- [39:45]
A
It's gonna be too posh.
- [39:47]
B
Exactly. It's not. It's gonna be like, you know, the. The blonde kid from Karate Kid. We need. We need a Ralph Macchio frog. We need a frog that everyone has counted out that nobody expects anything from. Absolutely.
- [39:59]
A
And that.
- [39:59]
B
You know what I mean? So we need to find us a streetwise underestimated frog for working class frog.
- [40:05]
A
Thank you. But then also, we do need to find a little top hat and cane for our frog as well for later.
- [40:11]
B
You want him to be from the
- [40:12]
A
wbs, a jacket with tags.
- [40:15]
B
Hello, my baby, hello, my darling. Hello, my ragtime guy.
- [40:18]
A
Now you would think that I would have an answer to this, but I have a question for you guys. Can either one of you. Because I still can't. After the numerous meetings we've had on this topic and us planning our entire financial future around this week, I still don't know how one wins a frog jump. I've watched videos of people getting down on the ground, kind of smacking the ground to get their frog to jump. Is it how high the frog jumps? Is it how far the frog jumps? Is it panache? Do they take in to consideration?
- [40:46]
B
Panache is highly subjective.
- [40:48]
C
Our financial future is not actually tied to Kalshee winning or not. It's tied to the donors.
- [40:54]
B
Andrew just meant the fun generally, but thank you for the clarification.
- [40:57]
C
Yeah, I just want to be real clear. We're not taking the donations that people are giving us, putting it all on calcium.
- [41:02]
B
In fact, yesterday I said to John, I was like, dude, you should do one of these poly markets. I was texting with John, I was like, these poly markets are just crazy from a kind of data standpoint. And John said, I don't really think that's a thing I want to get into because I don't know if I would get out of it in a healthy way. And I was like, yeah, let's not give the guy with all the passwords.
- [41:19]
A
Yeah, no kidding.
- [41:19]
B
A gambling problem. So, yes, the. The financial future of TBTL rests on the Thawne itself, but we do not have any money writing. And by the way, no frogs will be harmed. For my fellow, like, you know, intrusive animal empathy heads out there, you know, they, they catch the frogs, they take very good care. We're gonna take very good care of our frog. And then after the, the jump, which you're right, Andrew, unclear how it's really if it's, if it's distance, if it's height, what it is, but then we will release them back to the golf course or the mean streets of, you know, wherever they're from. So, yeah, this is. I'm going to be my. Even more than winning the frog jump, for me, the important thing is that our frog is untraumatized by this. That's a big deal for me.
- [42:06]
A
Yeah. And we're in. This frog is, you know, we're, like I mentioned before, a lot of people just get their frog the night before the frog jump, but we're going to, like, we're going to get this frog a little bit earlier in the week and care for this frog and take it on walks, I assume. I don't know about the potty training, but we're going to swear to God
- [42:20]
B
this frog picks up a condom.
- [42:22]
A
Oh, my God.
- [42:23]
B
I am. I'm out.
- [42:25]
A
I know, I know.
- [42:26]
B
You're not to walk the frog. Every time you walk an animal, Andrew, it comes back with some disgusting sex item.
- [42:32]
A
Now I am picturing our frog with a little spiked leash or a little spiked collar on a little leash as we walk it down Main Street. But anyway, yeah, I'm very much, very much looking forward to this. And now we can talk about it more and more. That's always one of the toughest things for me in the lead ups to these thons is as we're making plans in the background, not being able to tell the listeners right away what we're cooking up. And now that we're cooking it up, we can continue to cook it up with the listeners in mind. And by the way, I mean, we're not, we're not holding any kind of special event or anything at the frog jump. It's just the frog jump that is the event. But if people are in the area and want to swing by the Valley City frog jump and root for our frog, which, yeah, I don't know if we've locked him down a billion. I do think that they have.
- [43:16]
B
Dave's are giving us some kind of a little space. So, yeah, that's. I think that's an important detail too. Like, if you're gonna be anywhere near Valley City on the 19th of July, Sunday the 19th, come out to the frog jump. We will be there with a frog and we would love to say hi. And I think there is gonna be a little kind of area where tens can kind of get together and hang out and chat it up and talk to us and that whole thing. So, yeah, there is.
- [43:41]
A
If Lisa wants to bring a buzz ball. Bring a buzz ball.
- [43:45]
B
That made the party last time.
- [43:47]
A
I don't. Do you know, actually, do we know. Are you allowed to bring.
- [43:49]
B
I don't think anyone consumed any part of the buzz ball.
- [43:51]
A
No.
- [43:51]
C
Are.
- [43:53]
A
Are you allowed to bring buzz balls to the frog chomp? Actually, it occurred to me, if you're
- [43:56]
B
freaking cool, can you roll up on a car?
- [44:00]
C
That's a no for us.
- [44:01]
B
That rolls on buzz balls. Well, there's the answer that Dave's will give you. And then there's the answer cool Uncle Luke will give you, which is just be chill about it.
- [44:10]
A
Then there's the answer that the brown paper bag will give you that I want to see shields the label of
- [44:15]
B
the round globular paper bag. I want to see someone enter a green buzz ball in the frog. Yes. Actually, buzzball would be an okay.
- [44:28]
A
Oh, I like that.
- [44:29]
B
Frogs.
- [44:29]
C
Cowshe buzz ball.
- [44:30]
B
Yeah, Cowshe buzz ball. Something involving twisted tea. I don't know. They don't have to all be alcoholic. Oh, we, you know, I don't know what the process. We haven't. We have. Yeah, right. We haven't. Right. Cow. Sheeping of ice. We haven't decided exactly on what the name for the frog will be or even how we're gonna decide that. But if anyone has ideas, feel free to send them in.
- [44:51]
A
Sure.
- [44:52]
B
You know, if you have ideas for the name of the TBTL frog, you can email us, actually, why don.
- [44:57]
A
That'd be fun. Maybe John. Why don't you send some ideas to John? Would you mind kind of fielding those, John? And maybe we can get you on maybe next week or something.
- [45:04]
B
Jo N. That's right.
- [45:07]
C
I do think part of it. I think it was Andrew, you said this when we were talking about maybe it was you, Luke. I apologize if it was. It's like a pet. Like you can't name it till you know it kind of thing. So actually, if we have a bunch of names that people send me a bunch of ideas, we have like a good selection, like, oh, you do look like a buzzball, or you do look like a cow.
- [45:27]
B
I like the Alliteration. So, yeah, so that's the big announcement. July 13th through 17th, we will be in Valley City, Ohio. As you mentioned, Andrew will be live streaming the show per usual on the thon week. So people will be able to call in and stream the show.
- [45:43]
A
Yeah. 10:00am West Coast Time, 1:00pm East Coast Time. You can do the math in between those times. But that's when we'll be doing the live streams on YouTube, on our usual YouTube channel. We'll have a link to it@tvtl.net each day.
- [45:56]
B
Yes. And then again the 19th, we will be at the Frog Jump. So if you are in the Midwest and you want to come out and say hi and hang out at the. At the festival, come say hi to us. We'll. We'll be there. So, yeah, that's the big announcement. A slightly less important announcement, Andrew, is that I have officially lost my mind. And I texted you about this yesterday and you were like, I'm not sure if you're being sarcastic or not when I told you I need to update you on Tim Heidecker's Keith Urban joke.
- [46:24]
A
Okay. Yeah. Do you wanna.
- [46:26]
B
So a couple of days ago when I was talking about I'm gonna go interview Keith Urban next week in, in Nashville, you said something about, well, how is he doing that country music when his name is Urban?
- [46:37]
A
I said, you should ask him. Yeah. If he, if it was an issue, he should be Keith Rural because he does music that appeals to rural, you know, America. John, you don't have to laugh at that. I know that it was a pretty laugh.
- [46:50]
B
And that's why I was so surprised when I was on Office Hours Live as a very background character. And then Tim Heidecker said that made the same joke. He said, Keith Rural. And then I told you about that yesterday, Andrew, and I thought, I guess that was kind of like a, you know, affirmation of your joke. I mean, if the great Tim Heidecker made the same joke, that must mean there's some merit to it. And then I did something I don't do a lot, but because I'm not on that show, I've never been on that show before and I'm clearly. I was fairly geeked up about it. I decided to go watch it on YouTube just to see if I looked and sounded as nervous as I felt.
- [47:26]
A
And did you
- [47:28]
B
that? You know, it's very hard to assess that. I think I can really hear some nerves in my voice, but probably somebody who's not me would be a better judge of that. But the Truly astonishing thing, Andrew, was it wasn't Tim Heidecker who made the Keith Urban Keith Rural joke. It was me. The call was coming from inside the Burbank and I completely in my mind again, I was in a bit of a fugue state, I guess. I totally thought that Tim Heidecker had said to me something about Keith Rural. No, I. You can just hear me quietly saying, yeah, Keith Rural. Almost like half off Mike, as they're moving on.
- [48:19]
A
Oh, and you didn't. Not.
- [48:21]
B
It was me. I stole your joke.
- [48:23]
A
But you didn't. And first of all, like, okay, let me tell you what I thought it was going to be. When you said yesterday that Tim Heidecker said that joke, I was like, yeah, but like, even me, I was saying that joke to be corny. And if Tim said that joke, he was doing it as a bad joke to say. That's why I wasn't complimented by that, because I was like, yeah, because he's. He's making a bad joke, as did I. But it turns out you stole a bad joke.
- [48:48]
B
Stole your valor.
- [48:49]
A
But. But it's not even valor. It's shame. You stole my shame, which is actually
- [48:52]
B
kind of less shame for you.
- [48:54]
A
But how did you. Did you set it up at all or did you just sort of mumble?
- [48:58]
B
I just sort of mumbled.
- [48:59]
A
That, to me, is the funniest part
- [49:01]
B
of this whole thing. Quietly in the background of the show. So bad. So Tim Heidecker says, like, who's the last person you interviewed? And I, as I said on the show yesterday, I completely blanked out. And I said, well, I can tell you that I'm going to be interviewing Keith Urban next week. And there was kind of like a little. And then I said. And then Tim is literally moving on and you just hear me background going like, more like Keith Rural or something.
- [49:31]
A
It's so bad.
- [49:32]
B
It's so terrible. It's. It's like, it is the. And also you asked me yesterday on the show, Andrew, how I felt I did. And I said, well, I made no impact, which I was okay with. Yeah, Like, I, I was like, it's better than if I embarrassed myself with a bad joke. I went back and watched it and I absolutely embarrassed myself. Your bad joke.
- [49:51]
A
Well, don't blame your bad. Don't blame me for it. So do, do you think any.
- [49:55]
B
You.
- [49:56]
A
The way you're describing it, though, a lot of people probably even notice it. Probably. It just went so quickly. I was going to say, should we listen to it? Or that.
- [50:03]
B
Yeah, we probably.
- [50:04]
C
While you're looking up Kaidress. My big concern with this.
- [50:06]
A
Yeah.
- [50:06]
B
Will you buy ahead of you going
- [50:08]
C
on like Tim or producers or somebody who's like, oh, let's like check out this Luke Burbank's work. And they like listen to a couple episodes of TBTL and they heard Andrew make that joke and then they heard you make that joke. They're like, is he plagiarizing his own co host on like, do you think that was going through their heads at all as a possibility?
- [50:27]
A
That would be an incredible attention.
- [50:29]
B
It's a pretty deep cut. I feel like you do have a
- [50:32]
C
history of plagiarizing Andrew. This is not the first time this has come up.
- [50:36]
B
I know, but this was a weird one because I not only plagiarized Andrew. Yeah. I also plagiarized Andrew and Genevieve on. Wait, wait, don't tell me once.
- [50:43]
C
Right, right.
- [50:44]
B
With a Professor Bananas joke.
- [50:46]
A
Oh, you just used the name Professor Bananas, right?
- [50:49]
B
Yeah, but I think we got that
- [50:50]
A
from 30 Rock, so that's okay. Okay.
- [50:52]
B
Oh, okay. Well, I feel a little less about. Okay, this is kind of. Let's see here. Okay, this is. I think I'm Neil dropping it in roughly the right place. Tim Heidecker is talking about, I guess Art Garfunkel went on CBS this Morning. Not the show that I'm on, but the other one. And it was clearly like a pharmaceutical ad about his like eczema or something. I don't know anything about this, but it's I guess a running bit on office hours because it's just like, it's so obviously spawn con. So Tim is kind of talking about that about cbs and I think he's about to get to me. Pharmaceutical brand for this interview. We'll see what happens. I need some peppers, my brothers. I'm happy to answer any questions you have, Luke. Actually, let's see, I'll come back a little bit. Sorry. Everybody was thinking of right now is onion chopping, asshole. Yes, yes, Here we go. Luke Burbank, I guess is one of these reporters. He sits down like you remember when we were watching. Oh, we were watching Art Garfunkel getting interviewed by one of these CBS Morning guys about his. What's that called? He had a disease.
- [52:06]
C
The skin thing.
- [52:08]
B
Hey, at least we are not the only ones who can think of words.
- [52:11]
A
That makes me feel so much better.
- [52:12]
B
There's like 1100 people that work on the show and nobody could come up with eczema in the moment.
- [52:17]
A
Just hearing these guys sort of low energy mumble, trying to think of the word eczema makes me feel like maybe I have a future in this town.
- [52:26]
B
Yeah, right. Yeah. So. Or psoriasis. I'm going to be out there plugging some pharmaceutical brand for this interview. We'll see what happens. I use the peppers, my brothers. I'm happy to answer any questions you have. Luke. Luke. Who's the last person you interview. Interviewed? Let's see. Anthony. Where were we? Anthony Kiedis. Yes, Anthony Kiedis is here. By the way, we've buried the lead on this. Well, I'm gonna be interviewing Keith Urban next week, so that's a pretty big deal.
- [52:58]
A
So you.
- [52:58]
B
You focus mostly on relevant people like Keith Urban. Yeah, we try to catch everybody kind of on the. On the downswing.
- [53:05]
C
On the downswing.
- [53:06]
A
Oh, I thought, how do you like me?
- [53:08]
B
All right,
- [53:11]
C
how do you like me now? Is that Keith Urban?
- [53:14]
B
No. Oh, that's great. Toby Keith. You ever get. Did you catch that?
- [53:18]
A
Yeah, there's some.
- [53:20]
C
That was good.
- [53:20]
A
Well, let's not overuse the G word. But it's. I mean, it's certainly not as bad as I thought it was going to be.
- [53:28]
B
I guess it was ever was to. They're playing Toby Keith singing how do you like me now? And then I'm saying that's Keith rural.
- [53:35]
A
Yeah. At least there was some structure to it. At least there was some structure to it. Like, anything. And honestly, I'm not trying to be insulting here, you know that I love Tim Heidecker and I consider him on par with me as far as comedy is concerned. But, like, it is an atmosphere where people really are just throwing anything out there. Just saying Kiedis. Just saying Anthony Kiedis is also not a joke. It is clearly an atmosphere where people are just throwing things out there. Whatever is top of mind. Some things are gonna stick and some things aren't. So honestly, hearing all of the content context to that, including the Anthony Kiedis thing leading up to it, I feel like it was very much in the spirit of the moment.
- [54:13]
C
Yeah, that's why. Further record. That's what I mean by good. Like the way you were initially describing it, Luke, like, you, like Andrew kind of joke, like you're mumbling off screen off Mike. Like, I was expecting to be like very quiet, like five. I was expecting them to have totally moved on from the subject and then just Keith.
- [54:29]
A
But like, you.
- [54:30]
C
It was like, it was. You were right there.
- [54:31]
A
Your timing was playing with your dolls for some reason.
- [54:34]
C
But, like, your timing, like, it was like. Like right in the moment. And it was like you were like clear to hear.
- [54:39]
B
It wasn't as bad as my memory of it was.
- [54:41]
C
No, no, no, no. Yeah. So that's why, that's why I meant by good. It wasn't terrible.
- [54:45]
A
Let's talk though about. Can we. Can I ask you another question, Luke? It has nothing to do with. This is actually about the NBA playoffs.
- [54:51]
B
Finals.
- [54:52]
A
No. It's interesting to hear you talk about this moment where you're like kind of so out of your mind that you literally had a false memory about this moment. And like I have that feeling a lot. Not when I am having to do anything that is kind of public facing. I'm not talking about this podcast as we're recording it now.
- [55:11]
B
No, we try to keep this as private facing.
- [55:13]
A
We've worked very hard to do that. Yes, exactly. Congrats to us.
- [55:17]
B
You know, maybe a little bit when
- [55:19]
A
we're doing it live on YouTube, but more I'm talking maybe the first few minutes on stage if we're doing a live show. But even the, even anything under the TBT umbrella, I feel a little bit of, of more comfort with these days because I'm with you. We've been doing it for a while. You're very comfortable on stage. So I always, you know, I, I mean, not to sound weird about it, but I'm in good hands or whatever. But in moments where I have to much lower stakes, like give a toast at a small gathering or I'm even thinking, I think I mentioned to you that I can't remember if we've updated the listeners on this, but I've got to give. I've got to interview my friend about his book at a, at a brewery later this month. I'll give the date out on that side. Don't want to give out too many announcements and one show, but I can imagine, I'm assuming that the first, at least five minutes of that, if not the entire time, my head is going to be swimming. I'm going to have almost this out of body experience. Oh, when I read that poem at my friend's wedding a couple of years ago, I referenced that recently. My level of nervousness can only be described as I leave my body in a certain way and then when I come back to my body, my body does not feel super good. To be honest with you, in some of these cases. So the fact that you even had a little bit of, a little bit of that, you were kind of so out of your mind in this little moment that must not happen to you very often.
- [56:39]
B
It doesn't. And it's funny because this was the one that really got to me, you know, as compared to some other things that I have done that would be arguably, I guess, you know, more people watching or listening or something. It's actually funny. I didn't realize in the moment, but they were playing. One of them was playing the. Wait, Wait, don't tell me music.
- [56:58]
A
You catch that?
- [57:00]
B
When they were tossing to me, because there's just so many people playing so many sound effects.
- [57:05]
A
Well, that's kind of cool, too. So, yeah, they did a little bit of. They knew who you were coming in.
- [57:09]
B
I think, like, Vic Berger was. Because again, he started following me on Instagram a few days ago. I think he was kind of tracking me a little bit. And then also some of the guys in the control room, one of them was like, I'm a big Wait, Wait. Fan. And it's funny because I just think of. Wait, Wait, listen, I love being on the show. I'm very lucky to be on the show. But it just. If there's something that's the opposite of Office Hours Live, it feels like it's. Wait, wait, don't tell me. Just a very different program for a sort of different audience, etc. So all that is to say I, you know, I've done things where I'm in front of, like, lots and lots of people or stuff that I should be more nervous about, and it doesn't really phase me, but that I was deeply phased on. On Wednesday morning, it was really like, I was. I think it's just because I, you know, I'm. I hold Tim Heidecker in such high regard, and I just wanted to be. I kept kind of thinking back to, like. And I know we just talked about this not that long ago on the show, but, like, when I randomly was on stage with Martin Short and he was in the person of Jiminy Glick, and it was like. It was a really hard thing for me because I wanted to be funny and I wanted to be cool, and I wanted him to like me. But that's not really the job of the person who's being interviewed by Jiminy Glick. And this was a little bit like that, too. I felt like I just wanted them. I wanted them to get it that I got it or something. But I didn't want to do too much. I didn't want to try too hard. I didn't. Certainly did not want to actually. It was also hard because, you know, most of the time, the. The cameras and mics were all in the room that those guys were in. And I was in the control room. Only occasionally would they, like, cut to a different camera of the control room. And it was hard for me to not sort of be, like, trying to be a fifth member of the show while watching it. So they'd say something and I'd be like, oh, yeah, that from that thing, or whatever. And I realized, I think I was getting on the nerves of the guys in the control room because I was
- [58:53]
A
like, you were just talking to them and though mics are on in that.
- [58:57]
B
Yeah, I mean, I was really trying to be aware of what I was like. You know what I mean? I was trying to not distract them or annoy them because they were like, you know, one of the guys is switching all the cameras all the time, which is also an interesting visual art of the show. And he's, like, pushing in on people and stuff. They played this insane corporate, like, Microsoft corporate video about something called, like, song Microsoft Songsmith, which is like, way before AI, way before Suno and all that stuff. It was something where you could, like, sing into your laptop, and it would just, like, start creating, like, beats and music behind it. But this is this, like, very long. I mean, it's right up there with, like, it's your lucky day. You just found a flash drive in the parking lot. Kind of level of cringe. And the premise of the. Of this Microsoft ad, it might be on YouTube somewhere, is that the guy who's, like, the star, he's trying to figure out how to do this business pitch at his work. And what he has invented are glow in the dark towels. In the corporate ad, he's trying to figure out how to pitch these Glow in the Dark towels at his workplace. And he uses this Microsoft song symphony thing to sing a song, which of course, gets the attention of his boss because it's out of the box, right? And somehow in the song, he sings the line, the towels light the way, which is one of the most unhinged things I've ever heard. And there's also the other guy. So it's weird because it's supposed to be, like, a business meeting, but they clearly didn't want to spend on, like, too many extras. So it's just the boss and these two dudes. Whereas you think if you're gonna do, like, a boardroom type of scene, you're gonna hire, like, you know, 12 people to be sitting around the conference table. It's just this one dude, the guy singing about the towels light the way, and then their Boss, this woman. And the other guy is looking at the towels. Light the way guy. With such open hostility, which is not even what they're trying to like. That's not why they cast this guy. It's just like he's just a weird actor. They shot it wrong. Like they did this thing where they kind of cross. You know, Andrew, you might know this from your filmmaking days, but like, there's sort of like an invisible line you don't cross with perspective on the camera of the POV of the person. So you know a person is looking a certain way on camera. You don't then go to where you've crossed that invisible line. So now they're looking in kind of a different direction. It's.
- [61:32]
A
Without bouncing to something else first. Like a jump cut side of situation. Yes, yes.
- [61:37]
B
So it's like it's one of these kind of unwritten rules of like filmmaking they totally violated.
- [61:42]
A
Oh, God.
- [61:42]
B
So this guy is just like kind of looking in the wrong direction and like with like a homicidal kind of rage.
- [61:48]
A
Now, is he the inventor or is he.
- [61:50]
B
No, he's the other. He's the guy being upstaged. Oh, by the towels.
- [61:54]
A
Like the way I see. Because he's got his own idea. Can we just take one second though? And is there a benefit to towels that glow in the dark? Is this something like, actually worth exploring?
- [62:05]
B
I believe it was brought up on Office Hours Live and I was certainly thinking it not a bad product, like
- [62:11]
C
for like skinny dipping at night.
- [62:12]
A
Well, I was something.
- [62:13]
B
Or just go in the bathroom and maybe you don't want to turn the light on because you're trying to not fully wake up. That's my move. But maybe a little light from the towels. Listen, listen. The towels lighting the way is not. Is not a horrible product.
- [62:27]
A
There are worse.
- [62:27]
B
In fact, I would say the glow in the dark towels are a stronger product than the Microsoft Song Symphony thing, potentially.
- [62:35]
A
I need a Reader's Digest that glows in the dark for my.
- [62:37]
B
There was my late night needs. There was also a brief moment where they started playing it and I had this thought. Am I in this? Not because I thought that they had found my work, but because I was in so many Microsoft things back in the day. No longer. Which is why.
- [62:55]
A
Is that really. Is that really no longer or. Yeah. Has that been a decision or is the. Are we allowed to talk about this or have you just not been invited recently? And so you're wondering if the door is closed?
- [63:06]
B
I think that. I think that it's just you know, I think I've been in enough. I don't think that there's, I don't think there's any anti. Luke sort of movement at Microsoft. There's nobody there saying we can't have Luke and stuff. I just think it's like I did a million things. I'm 50 years old. There's younger, more interesting maybe. I don't know. Just like, I think things move on and I think that they probably had me in enough things and I'm. I'm not kind of like a bright, shiny idea in anyone's mind at Microsoft, which is completely fine.
- [63:34]
A
So this is just based on the fact that like you used to do it on a more regular basis and it's been a while since your earphone rang on it. It wasn't like a precise landed or anything like that.
- [63:42]
B
No, they didn't, they didn't. They did not rehire me to do their like, security. Yeah, the security stuff. Which, the writer of that, my buddy Kurt, he, he emailed me like way before, like six months and he was like, yeah, I just heard from them that they're gonna kind of like do a different thing for their security training and that, you know, they'd had me, I had done it for like, I don't know, five or six years. So it was a, it was a good run. I also kind of dreaded it. Like, it paid really well, but it also really stressed me out. And so it's, you know, it's one of those things where, where I'm sad to not have the money, but I'm also like, kind of happy to not have to go do it.
- [64:17]
C
Is it possible that they have so much of you, your voice and personality in storage that they just do?
- [64:23]
B
AI, Luke, I would be so flattered. That would mean that they like me enough to rip me off.
- [64:30]
A
Keep you alive forever,
- [64:33]
B
like a modern day Ozzy Osbourne. I would be fine with that and I would be very flattered. I think it's just more that like, you know, companies like to, you know, change and move and shake things up and try new things and stuff. So I don't take it personally at all. But it also is clear to me that like, I'm not getting pitched in meetings there as like, oh, we could have Luke do this. Because also I think like half of the people that were doing that have probably also moved on from Microsoft. Like, I think I had a few, you know, sort of people that were advocating for me there who may or may not even be in those positions. Anymore. I don't, I really do not take it personally in any way, but when they put on a Microsoft corporate video, I was like, there's a 50, 50 chance I'm in this by just by happenstance. Not because they were like, you know, researching my background, but because I tried out for and was in so many weird cringe Microsoft things back in the day that were not for broadcast. They were purely for the internals of Microsoft.
- [65:32]
A
I was googling around while you're talking because I was.
- [65:35]
B
Did you find the towels light the way?
- [65:36]
A
No, I didn't. But I did find, and this surprises me, I found some of these newer Microsoft videos and this is the guy that's replaced me. It may be what everyone thinks of
- [65:46]
B
themselves as, but I consider myself to
- [65:49]
C
be an absolutely dead center, normal average American.
- [65:52]
A
So that's apparently the new Luke in the Microsoft videos. So I guess they did go sort of a younger, fresher direction.
- [65:59]
B
Speaking of, I'm going to be in New York next week, as I mentioned, and usually when I'm there, I, if, if they'll let me, I throw a few commentaries down. So I've been working. I was working some up on the plane yesterday. I was really getting my Andy Rooney on.
- [66:13]
A
Do you address.
- [66:14]
B
I want to do one about the ABS system.
- [66:17]
C
I don't use foul language and I
- [66:19]
B
don't like to hear anyone else use it either.
- [66:21]
A
You can't do one about swearing. It's already been done. What is the. Oh, the, the ABS system. What's your hot take?
- [66:27]
B
My hot take? Well, I haven't fully.
- [66:29]
C
What's your Subway take?
- [66:30]
B
Yeah, right. By the way, that guy has a new talk show. Remember I said he's been doing a ton of media and I didn't know what it was for? It's because he now has something in addition to Subway Takes that's called like Tonight Pilot or something. I don't know what it's called. But anyway, my hot take on the ABs, as far as I've formed it, is it would be hard for any of us to have someone standing right next to us at all times, scientifically analyzing if we're doing a good job. Like it must. Like, I have no particular love for the MLB umpires and their fragile, fragile egos generally. But also it must really suck to be like the call is being challenged and then it's like you got it wrong and then everyone erupts and you have to just like hunker down behind the catcher again. Like having been just like massively publicly disrespected so that's kind of. That's, that's as far as I've gotten with the idea.
- [67:29]
A
Yeah, no, that's smart. That's relatable. I think about that too. Yeah.
- [67:32]
B
I tend to think about strikes as being a general down the middle pitch.
- [67:37]
A
That's how I would approach it in my day. What the umpire said went.
- [67:41]
B
It does. I know exactly. All of this questioning of authority is going to get us in a lot of trouble.
- [67:48]
A
I do.
- [67:48]
B
Really though, like, it is crazy. I know I've.
- [67:51]
A
Everybody should do what they're told.
- [67:54]
B
It's so crazy how quickly you become Andy Rooney when you're trying to write one of these things. Because the only way for it to be interesting, if it is gonna be interesting at all, is to have a sort of a take and it's. You know what I mean? Otherwise it's like, what are you even talking about? But then the having of a take on a mundane topic, it just. I hear Andy Rooney in my head so bad.
- [68:16]
A
It's interesting.
- [68:17]
B
So embarrassing.
- [68:18]
A
I wonder how much it comes out though. So I have a very formative professional memory and it was actually involved one of the first times I was asked to actually talk into a microphone on the radio. And it was during a public radio pledge drive, right, Fun drive. And this was in New Hampshire and I was at this. I had been at the station for quite some time at this point, probably getting close to 10 years or something. So I wasn't like a new kid anymore. But I had been one of the main fundraiser producers. So live on the air I'd wake up and do the morning edition shift and some of the other kind drive time shifts because I loved producing but I was never on the radio actually talking to mikes. I was writing ideas on whiteboards or what have you. And so anyway, but then my boss at one point, Mike Arnold, who was on the show at one point said, hey, let's get you trained up to maybe do more of a on air midday shift, a less listened to shift or something like that. Let's just see how you are. And before I was able to do any on air pitching, he had us do practice shifts. And I can't remember who he paired me up with, but he put us in a booth and it was me and you know, a colleague who is, you know, be my co host or whatever and in a producer. And it wasn't live on the air and we just did a few like fake breaks or whatever and tape them and then talked about them. And Mike would come in and give us feedback. And he just said, like, essentially, like I was very low energy. You know how it is, Luke. Sometimes even you talk about yourself.
- [69:48]
B
I hear old tapes of me and it's like, like there's something about both public radio and being young. I feel like you just go low
- [69:53]
A
energy and maybe something about, well, I say this a lot, but maybe also something about our, Our slacker generation or something. There was something about, like not wanting to seem too enthused maybe during your first broadcast of TBTL or something. Maybe it seemed cringey or dorky or whatever holds us back. But I definitely. My insecurity was manifesting and being pretty low energy. Although I didn't feel low energy. My heart was racing even for the practice sessions. You know, I'm, I'm nervous, but my nervousness was having me. Keith. Rural, like. Anyway, what Mike said, and this really stuck in my head was, and I'm sure I've told you this story before, Luke, so maybe you know where I'm going with this. We had another colleague named John, John Greenberg, who was a bit older than me and he was an editor at the station. And he was the opposite of me, energy wise, just a big. He wasn't like a huge character, but he just had. He comes into a room and John's here. You know, he's just got a lot of energy. And he brought that to the. He's a great fundraiser and brought that to the air. And Mike said to me, listen, when we do this again, I want you to do your impression of John Greenberg. Like he said, don't worry about it. You're not going to get anywhere near John Greenberg. Just do your best. You do your best to get up to John Greenberg's level. And I'm telling you, you're not going to be John Greenberg. Nobody's going to think you sound like John Greenberg. You're just going to. It's just going to.
- [71:13]
B
It'll bring you up to.
- [71:14]
A
It'll bring you up to having a pulse.
- [71:17]
C
Thank you.
- [71:18]
A
Now I'm not feeling so great about myself again.
- [71:20]
C
No.
- [71:21]
A
And I just, I. It was such good advice, you know, like, because I, at that point, like now I'm like yelling it down the line at both of you guys right now. I don't need anybody to animate me, I guess, anymore. But at the time, I felt so nervous.
- [71:35]
B
Greenberg.
- [71:36]
A
Yes, I've achieved Greenberg velocity, but actually
- [71:42]
B
that's a good show.
- [71:46]
A
Let me write that down. But anyway, so I can't remember how we kind of got on this topic. But I do remember just thinking like, if you shoot for that, you're going to find your own voice in the process. You're not actually gonna. And so when you're writing these. These scripts or whatever you would call them, I don't think anybody's gonna think like, boy, he really sounds like Andy Rooney. Even if you sat down to write it like Andy Rooney. It's just sort of a. You kind of gotta get a voice in your head sometimes times.
- [72:13]
B
Totally. Can I play for you guys quickly? I've now found it. It's Microsoft Songsmith was this program and this is the part of the business meeting where I think the guy is about to start singing about the towels. And again, full credit to Office Hours Live. And I don't know who there exactly found this tape, but we're just playing you something that I learned about on that show this week. So go smash the like and follow button for them because this is from them. But let's just see. I hope the volume here is not terrible.
- [72:40]
A
You have for us. Well, I used to open up the closet door. Yeah. And struggle in the dark. But now no more with Glow in the Dark towels. The towels light the way you can find your guest towel anytime night or day.
- [73:06]
B
I again, I'm just directly ripping them off. But I'm gonna send that. We can't use this for our imaging because this is everything that they were using on office hours this week. But I'm just gonna send you to a screenshot of the. His co worker reacting to the line the towels light the way he looks so angry.
- [73:26]
A
Can I ask, was his co worker pitching something else? Cause I'm interested. What did you tell us?
- [73:32]
B
What you know, we can go back to that if you want me to. We can start with the co worker's presentation. Ok, here we go. This is the coworker. Let's see what he's saying. He's not singing, by the way. 18 to 24 demographic we can expect. Thank you, Chip.
- [73:48]
A
So boring.
- [73:48]
B
That's all chip gets out. 18 to 24 demographics. I think that's enough. Chip.
- [73:53]
A
Yeah. Somebody needs to tell him to be like John Greenberg. He needs to get the energy up. He needs to have more.
- [73:58]
B
He's never going to be Greenberg, but if he tries.
- [74:00]
A
Exactly. I really. That song.
- [74:03]
C
Also the. The music of that towel song sounded very much like a bad take on like a Ott's like new Broadway production or that's a very specific thing.
- [74:13]
B
Or the first try at a Cars for Kids ad. Let's hear it again.
- [74:18]
A
What do you have for us? Well, I used to open up the closet door and struggle in the dark, but now no more with Glow in the Dark Towels. The towels light the way you can find your guest at sour anytime, night or day.
- [74:40]
B
All.
- [74:41]
C
All I hear is like, somebody was like, take Avenue Q but make it bad. That's like, that's all like, that's Avenue
- [74:48]
B
Q but take out the dirty stuff.
- [74:50]
C
Right. Well, that too.
- [74:51]
B
But what makes it good?
- [74:53]
C
That was like the vibe I'm getting there.
- [74:55]
B
Yeah. Anyway, I don't know how to wrap that up other than to say the towels light the. That was. Oh, that was my. So I was trying to get all ready for like, I didn't know if they were going to come back to me. This is back to Office hours Live, but like in hour number two, I had to actually go up and kind of like sit in. We. They had the. Our camera guy had set up all these lights and stuff up in a different part of Tim Heidecker's house. So I had to sit in so they could check the lighting and all this stuff. But they were still doing the show. And I was like, okay, I got to get down there by the last. For the last five minutes of the show in case they do like an around the horn thing. And then they like, you know, because I think that there's something on that show where it's like, everyone recommends something at the end, like something they're watching or listening to or whatever. And I was like really ready to do a towels light the way joke if they came back to me. But just to prove I was listening, they didn't come back to me. I didn't get a chance to drop that, that comedy knowledge on them. But, you know, hopefully next time, hopefully I made such a strong impression with my Keith Rural joke that they'll someday invite me back. So actually it was the last thing I'll say about it was coincidentally their guest was a guy named Schuyler Higley, who's this very funny stand up comedian and writer for the Onion, who was on Livewire like I don't know, a month ago. He was our stand up comic. So I got to flex a little bit and I was very careful when he came in, I didn't say anything. But then at halftime when he came out and when Heidecker was right there, I said, oh, hey Skyler, you were just on my radio show. He was like, oh, yeah, that was so fun. Did I. I made sure it all unfolded in Front of Heideck, who then
- [76:28]
A
was gaze of Heidecker. That's right. And you didn't.
- [76:31]
B
Knew that I had value.
- [76:32]
A
And you're like, do you remember the secret handshake I taught you on stage at live? One of the guys did the handshake and Heidecker looked a little bit. He looked a little bit like that guy in the. In the towels video. Like he had the little kind of shit. Exactly like him. Exactly. I can imagine.
- [76:47]
B
Well, my friends, should we slide down that dinosaur.
- [76:50]
A
Yeah.
- [76:51]
B
On into the weekend.
- [76:52]
A
Is there any. Is there any need to reiterate the details of what we said? I guess the TV telethon people just
- [76:58]
B
joining us for people just joining us.
- [77:00]
A
If you're just getting in your car, if you just dropped off your kids at school. TB Telethon 17 will begin on Monday, July 13, broadcasting live. Literally live via YouTube and all the usual channels. If you get it in your podcast feed from Valley City, Ohio, leading up to the frog jump. I wonder what year this frog jump is. We should. We should look. I would guess that if it was like a big one, if it ended in a zero, they'd probably be building
- [77:28]
B
that up at some point. I did look it up because I was trying to see if CBS would let me do a story about it. I think they've passed. Although, who knows? Maybe in New York I'll be able to convince them. But I don't remember it being like the 50 or anything like that.
- [77:40]
A
Yeah, well, we're gonna be special.
- [77:42]
B
And tbtlethon17. Greenberg velocity. Just pitching ideas here.
- [77:50]
A
Frogs are green. I like that. Yeah, I like that.
- [77:52]
B
Ooh. Actually, Greenberg philosophy. Philosophy also, like, like, maybe better than Buzzball.
- [77:58]
A
Yeah. I mean, this was something that you had said in a meeting, Luke. Now I'm not even sure there's something about us do. I was thinking about this last night. I was like, oh, yeah, I guess tomorrow's the big announcement. It's like, oh, I've given. I've given no thought to the announcement at all. Like, what are we saying? What are we not saying? But you had a good idea for naming the Thawne.
- [78:14]
B
Are we willing to jumping for joy?
- [78:16]
A
I love that. TB telephone 17. Jumping for joy. Do we want to lock that in?
- [78:21]
B
I mean, I came up with it, so I feel like I'm a little biased, but I do, actually. Although, actually, I think I have the opposite of whatever. The opposite of wanting to push my own ideas. Generally speaking, if I have the idea, my first thought is, that's a bad Idea. So in this case, I think it's not the worst idea. TBT Elethon 17. Jumping for joy because, you know, we got the frog jump. We are joyful and so happy that this is a thing we get to do for our jobs. Like, I like that idea.
- [78:49]
C
The only alternative is frogtastic voyage.
- [78:53]
B
Actually come along.
- [78:54]
A
That's not as bad as you might think it is.
- [78:56]
B
Frogtastic ride.
- [78:57]
A
Ride I like. What about TB Telethon 17? More like Keith rural.
- [79:05]
C
More like keep suburban.
- [79:06]
B
Yeah, yeah.
- [79:07]
A
All right.
- [79:07]
B
I mean, just. We're just, you know, blue sky in here, but blue sky in definitely.
- [79:12]
A
Okay, I'm sending all bad ideas.
- [79:15]
B
How about TB telephone 17? All bad ideas.
- [79:18]
A
Bad ideas.
- [79:20]
C
Seems like that's.
- [79:21]
B
I've just sent you guys both a screenshot of the guy as the towels light the way is being sung. And that's just a little. That's just a little thing to brighten up your weekend. Again, we can't use it for the show pick because I think it was literally the show pick for office hours live.
- [79:34]
C
So I sent you guys Wemby, Slenderman, if you want to use that as a show potential.
- [79:41]
A
That sounds good. Or maybe I'll create an AI frog with a little collar and a leash and me walking him by Liverpool Elementary School and use up some of the earth's water. No. No Good. All right. All right.
- [79:57]
B
That's gonna do it.
- [79:58]
A
I don't like this vibe. Sorry. I was trying a new piece of music that's a little bit too. Listen, this has been a fun, energetic show. We need some better energy.
- [80:05]
C
Oh, I got one.
- [80:06]
A
Is it. Is it. Can we use it? Is it rights free?
- [80:09]
B
I mean, at this point, maybe. Is the towels light the way rights free? We already violated.
- [80:15]
C
If I play music, will it play?
- [80:17]
A
It'll play too loudly. If you want to sen something to me.
- [80:20]
C
Yeah, let me send you a link.
- [80:21]
A
All right, let me send you a link. We're gonna have to.
- [80:24]
B
Related.
- [80:24]
C
Yes.
- [80:25]
A
Okay.
- [80:26]
B
What do they have a song? I mean, if somebody in New York recorded, like, you know, that's also one of the fun things when your team does well, at least it used to be back in my day, which was, you know, somebody would write, you know. Well, famously, the Bears had the super bowl shuffle. The Seahawks did the dumbest one because, you know, there's that song black and Yellow that. That was Khalifa does. And that's kind of about the Steelers, because Khalifa's friends from. From Pittsburgh. And it's a great song. That song.
- [80:53]
A
Oh, my God, this guy's so pissed about the towel song. Sorry.
- [80:57]
B
I told you, it's crazy.
- [81:00]
A
Oh, my God. He looks a little bit. He's got the. Well, this is maybe going too far, but he looks a little bit like Anton lavey.
- [81:06]
B
The bit of a receding hairline and kind of a Caesar cut.
- [81:10]
A
You don't want that guy mad at you. All right. Okay.
- [81:13]
C
Andrew, I just sent you.
- [81:14]
A
I got it.
- [81:14]
B
Here, here.
- [81:16]
C
A classic from the 90s last time. The Knicks are really good.
- [81:19]
A
Okay, sounds good. I'm going to start. I'm going to start it hot here, Luke. And then we'll. We'll duck it under. Okay, let's.
- [81:26]
B
This Len. We are the New York Knicks.
- [81:30]
A
Oh, my God.
- [81:31]
C
We are the New York Knicks.
- [81:33]
B
I don't think we're going to get put down for this.
- [81:34]
A
No, we're good.
- [81:40]
B
Is that Alan, Hugh, Christian?
- [81:42]
C
No, sadly not.
- [81:44]
A
All right.
- [81:45]
B
Are the Knicks in the song? Do they get to like.
- [81:47]
A
Do they do it? Do they do bars?
- [81:49]
C
No, no, but this was what they would play at the Garden back in the day.
- [81:52]
A
But they're lip syncing in the video, right?
- [81:54]
C
Oh, are they?
- [81:55]
A
I thought so. Maybe. I don't know. Who? Basketball people.
- [81:57]
C
I didn't actually watch the video.
- [81:58]
B
Yeah,
- [82:07]
A
Pointers. And we're running fast.
- [82:09]
B
Watch out, K. Dude. Little hokey.
- [82:11]
C
Yeah, this was actually like professionally produced.
- [82:16]
B
Oh, it sounds like this sounds like the sixth Beastie Boy.
- [82:28]
A
So you said you haven't watched the video of this? John, I feel like you should put eyes on this.
- [82:32]
C
I should.
- [82:32]
B
Maybe after we just to get hyped on Saturday.
- [82:34]
A
Just to get mood.
- [82:35]
C
I'll be a perfect.
- [82:36]
B
I'd say have three of your hams and then watch it. It'll probably hit just right, so. All right. Hey, John, thanks for being here today. We appreciate you, man. Thanks for all your work on this Thon, of course. And Andrew, you as well, man. You guys have both been really like doing a lot of the detail stuff on this. It's going to be really, really fun and hope everybody can tune in and critically support tptl because these Cali bets, that's. That's not the way to financial freedom.
- [83:01]
A
Did you just hear me seamlessly loop this? You ain't got nothing on me, Vic.
- [83:06]
B
Whoa.
- [83:08]
A
Just wanted to say that was.
- [83:09]
B
That was seamless. All right, thanks for listening, everybody. That's gonna do it for our broadcast week. We'll be back here on Monday with more imaginary radio for all of you. In the meantime, have a great weekend. Take care of yourselves. Go Knicks. And please remember, no mountain too tall.
- [83:23]
A
And good luck to all.
- [83:24]
C
We're Hubert, Bona, Craig and Harper.
- [83:26]
A
It's the Knicks, and we're back, back on pace.
- [83:28]
C
Everyone's gearing up for the championship race,
- [83:30]
A
and the fans are going crazy. And they're doing it for a reason.
- [83:32]
C
Because 94 is the nick of our season.
- [83:35]
A
You better believe the Knicks got all that cake. We shoot for three pointers and we're running fast breaks.
- [83:39]
C
And if your defense makes some mistakes, power out.