#4782 Grand Theft Memory

Summary

TBTL Episode #4782: “Grand Theft Memory”

Date: July 30, 2026
Hosts: Luke Burbank & Andrew Walsh

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Episode Overview

In this lively Thursday edition of TBTL, Luke and Andrew dig into a wide range of topics both serious and silly, blending discussions of recent Seattle news with trademark TBTL tangents and nostalgia. The pair explore the fallout from a recent "mass shooting" at Seattle’s Bite of Seattle festival, the drama surrounding Seattle's police chief and law enforcement conferences, shoddy media headlines, why they miss the quirky commentary of old-school public radio, an oddball eBay stalking case, and even the hidden songwriting powers of Diane Warren. Listeners are treated to insider stories, Blursday (birthday) shoutouts, and plenty of memorable, offbeat banter.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Seattle News: Bite of Seattle Shooting and Police Chief Drama

• [04:19] Andrew raises the hot Seattle news topic: a shooting at the Bite of Seattle festival and ensuing local discourse.
• [05:46] Discussion about “mass shooting” terminology:
  • Both hosts critique media’s use of “mass shooting” for this event, arguing it misleads the public into imagining a targeted, random attack, whereas the incident seemed more like crossfire among groups.
  • “Mass shooting sounds like somebody with a gun went to a place where there were a bunch of people and attempted to end as many lives as possible.” – Luke [07:05]
• [07:43] Media Responsibilities:
  • Andrew notes how news headlines can distress people unnecessary.
  • They reflect on the lack of nuanced conversations in reporting, often driving family and friends to panic.
• [09:44] Police Chief Sean Barnes' Absence:
  • Andrew details journalist Erica C. Barnett’s long-running reporting on Chief Barnes’ absences and frequent travel, particularly to law enforcement conferences, stating it’s been an open question whether Barnes has ever really moved to Seattle.
  • The shooting’s timing—while the chief was away—brought national attention to the story, likely leading to Barnes’ rumored resignation.
• Law Enforcement Conference “Inside Joke” [12:27]:
  • TBTL’s long-running law enforcement conference joke (from “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri”) resurfaces as both a personal and now, local news touchstone.
  • “Now whenever I hear law enforcement conference, I think about three billboards outside of Ebbing, Missouri. And now here we are.” – Andrew [13:30]

2. The Value (or Not) of Conferences

• [14:26] Luke’s Hot Take:
  • Conferences are usually overvalued for “networking” and “professional growth,” especially for public servants. Being present in the city is more important for leaders like the police chief.
  • “I think the actual value of going to a work conference is greatly overstated ... your more prime directive is to be around. So if something bad goes down, you can be there quickly.” – Luke [14:26]
• [16:41] Accountability and Reporting:
  • Andrew discusses the power and responsibility of watchdog journalism and how relentless local reporting (from Erica Barnett) may have tipped the scales towards the chief’s ouster.
• [18:47] The Media’s Focus & Public Reactions:
  • The pair briefly mention potential fallout, public perceptions of city safety, and the local media’s penchant for chasing headlines that fuel suburban anxiety about city events.

3. Sky Shows, Headlines, and Public Trust

• [18:51] Blue Angels and Misleading Headlines:
  • Coverage of Blue Angels' appearance at Seafair is criticized for vague, clickbait headlines about “changes” that turn out to be minor (e.g., Fat Albert support plane’s absence) [23:04].
  • “If you tell me there’s a problem with the Blue Angels ... I’m not thinking of their much more slow-moving cousin, Fat Albert.” – Luke [23:04]
• [24:37] Linking Violence and Public Events:
  • Luke questions Seattle Times’ quick shift to coverage about how the festival violence might affect other public events like Seafair, suggesting it’s a manufactured fear narrative.

4. The State of Public Media

• [39:43] Nostalgia for Old NPR:
  • Both hosts reminisce about NPR’s former penchant for quirky, poetic, or offbeat segments (“water poetry,” "meaningless, cringe, old-school” stories).
  • Luke airs frustrations about dour, neutral-but-negative reporting on modern public radio, wishing for André Codrescu, Baxter Black and “more cowboy poetry.”
  • “Just stories about nothing...I would love my message to whoever runs NPR these days is bring back more cowboy poetry and water poetry as well.” – Luke [39:43]
• Sample voices played:
  • Baxter Black, André Codrescu, and Bailey White.

5. Weird E-commerce Story: eBay’s $56M Stalking Settlement

• [48:21] Luke introduces the story:
  • Former eBay CEO and colleagues must pay $56 million to a couple they stalked and harassed after negative reporting on their small tech-news blog.
• [49:53] Andrew recalls the surreal news:
  • Both had previously dismissed coverage as a conspiracy, not realizing its roots in C-suite retaliation.
• [52:35] The Streisand Effect:
  • Andrew compares eBay’s overreaction to the classic “Streisand effect”—attempts to suppress information only raise its profile.
  • “It’s almost like a darker version of the Streisand effect, right?” – Andrew [55:06]
• [56:42] Streisand effect explained, plus a digression:
  • Luke ties the effect into the origin of Aerosmith’s “Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” (written by Diane Warren, inspired by a Barbra Streisand interview).

6. Diane Warren, Songwriting Machine

• [60:55] Luke quizzes Andrew on Diane Warren's biggest hits:
  • Includes “If I Could Turn Back Time” (Cher), “Look Away” (Chicago), “Because You Loved Me” (Celine Dion), “How Do I Live” (LeAnn Rimes), “When I See You Smile” (Bad English), “I Don’t Want to Miss a Thing” (Aerosmith).
  • Playful musical break: Andrew sings snatches of choruses.
• Shared reflection:
  • Nostalgia for late-80s/90s pop, and how lyric themes often revolve around longing/regret.

7. Listener Blursdays [64:40+] (Birthday Shout-outs and Listener Stories)

• Blursday messages span from inside jokes to detailed stories about listener relationships, childhood, and connections to the show.
• Notable:
  • A “golden Blursday” for a regular listener planning a birthday trip.
  • Recurring TBTL joke about “Grand Theft Memory” when Luke accidentally claims Andrew’s high school memory as his own [67:07].
  • Shared stories about listeners meeting at prom, hidden TBTL community connections, and affectionate but self-deprecating takes on the show’s impact.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Law Enforcement Conference Jokes:
  “Luke, I feel like you're surfacing this particular aspect of the Seattle story to prove to me that there are law enforcement conferences.” – Andrew [13:30]

• On the Value of Conferences:
  “I think the actual value of going to a work conference is greatly overstated...if you are the police chief of Seattle, your more prime directive is be around.” – Luke [14:26]

• On Modern Journalism:
  “It’s so rare in this day and age that independent journalism can actually kind of make a difference.” – Luke [33:49]

• On Streisand Effect:
  “An attempt to hide, remove, or censor information results in the unintended consequence of the effort, instead increasing public awareness of the information.” – Andrew [58:16]

• On Nostalgic Public Radio:
  “I would love my message to...whoever runs NPR these days is bring back more cowboy poetry and also water poetry, as Wonder Bread did involve machetes, table saws, piano wire, laser beams...” – Luke [39:43]

• On Listener Impact:
  “I will absolutely take the credit for everything cool and funny that Amelia says. Yeah, none of her bad renditions of Diane Warren songs she does not get from old unky Luke.” – Luke [70:48]

• On podcast legacy:
  “This show does not count as part of my legacy.” – Luke [78:02]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00 – Cold open: Sir Ian McKellen’s “how to act” monologue
• 02:21 – Episode intro and show theme
• 04:07 – Seattle police chief and Bite of Seattle shooting story begins
• 14:26 – “Spicy take” on work conferences’ real value
• 18:51 – Blue Angels coverage and clickbait headlines
• 23:04 – Fat Albert airplane, difference from Blue Angels
• 39:43 – Public radio nostalgia & segment samples (Baxter Black, Codrescu, Bailey White)
• 48:21 – eBay stalks journalists, $56M settlement
• 52:35 – “Streisand Effect” explanation
• 60:55 – Diane Warren “name that tune” segment
• 64:40 – Blursday (birthday shoutouts and listener stories)
• 78:02 – Reflections on podcast legacy, closing segment

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Tone & Style

Lighthearted, self-effacing, and digressive—all trademarks of TBTL. Luke and Andrew frequently veer off-topic for comedic effect but always circle back to deeper discussions about media, culture, and the peculiarities of being alive (and online) in 2026 Seattle. In keeping with their style, they blend earnest takes with wry, inside jokes and open listener engagement—making the episode engaging even (or especially) for new listeners.

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Summary prepared for listeners who missed the show or want a thoughtful recap.
Sponsored by zero law enforcement conferences and every Diane Warren ballad ever written.

Transcript

[Sir Ian McKellen]

How do I act so well? What I do is I pretend to be the person I'm portraying in the film or play. Yeah, you're confused. No, perfectly simple case in point. Lord of the Rings, Peter Jackson, comes from New Zealand, says to me, sir Ian, I want you to be Gandalf the wizard. And I say to him, you are aware that I am not really a wizard? And he said, yes, I am aware of that. What I want you to do is to use your acting skills to portray the wizard for the duration of the film. So I said, okay. And then I said to myself, mmm, how would I do that? And this is what I did. I imagined what it would be like to be a wizard, and then I pretended and acted in that way on the day. Yeah. And how did I know what to say? The words were written down for me in a script. How did I know where to stand? People told me. You see? Yeah. So now you would be pretending to be John in this play. And how would you know what to say? Well, the words would be in the script. Yeah. And you would learn the words. You would not have the script on the night. And that goes for everybody. There will be no script on the night. You'll learn the words. Yeah. No, I speak them as if you were saying them for the first time. I didn't think we would have the script. No, but you won't, because if you did have the script, it would break the illusion, and the whole thing is illusion. Do you see? You are not really John. No, I know. You are pretending, and that is acting.

[Andrew Walsh]

T T B T L In 1971, Bill Graetz invented Michael Soft. Wouldn't it be cool if I could

[Luke Burbank]

remember my dingus password for my email?

[Andrew Walsh]

We are super fun here, and I promise I won't stop until this little guy's leaping and laughing like the other kids. Wow, that was very hard to hear. So many negative words. And my grandpa likes to say, hot diggity dog. As I like to say, hot damn. Have a good show, dummies.

[Luke Burbank]

What you do is so important. Well, all right. Hello, good morning, and welcome, everyone, to a Thursday edition of tbtl, the show that just might be too beautiful to live. Is it too early to get a fish sandwich? My name's Luke Burbank. I am your host. I'm an activist and house party enthusiast. Com coming to you from the Madrona Hill studio, perched high above the mighty Columbia Room. Oh, ma pa. It's just beautiful. Absolutely spectacular. Thursday, July 30th here. As we arrive at episode 4782 in a collector's series.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let the fun begin.

[Luke Burbank]

Ebay has settled with a couple of journalists, some married journalists, for 50 cents, $6 million. I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career for stalking them, apparently, and going kind of nuts on these people that were, in my opinion, not really posing that much of a threat. Also, there was a guy returning to the United States via the airport and customs tried to grab his phone.

[Sir Ian McKellen]

Sorry.

[Andrew Walsh]

To use the phone.

[Luke Burbank]

He pulled like, a serious James Bond move, which now he's seriously in trouble for. We'll talk about duress code. Not dress code, which we do enforce strictly here on the program, but duress code. Also, it's a Thursday, AKA blursday, so happy birthday today. Do blursday messages, and we're gonna say hi to this guy. Longest running cobra over the show. Maybe best known for his depictions of the tall ships. Now that we do record these programs, visually, he gets a little bit nervous. I've never been on live telev before. He's Andrew Walsh, and he's joining me right now. Good morning, my friend.

[Andrew Walsh]

Good morning, Luke. I told you before the show I had a question for you, and I almost asked it before the show. Then I said, you know what? I'm gonna do the unthinkable, and I'm gonna ask this question on the show because. Well, it's probably a bad idea.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, what you really. Yeah, what you really said was, I'm gonna ask you a question whether or not it's a good idea.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exactly. All indicators are leaning towards no right now, to be honest with you. But I don't know how closely you've been following the news out of Seattle, but how much does it delight or dismay you that a law enforcement conference is at the heart of the biggest news story in this city right now?

[Luke Burbank]

I didn't see that they are actually having a law enforcement conference in Seattle.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, no, It's a little bit more complicated than that, which is why it's such a bad idea to bring this all up. And then untangle both. To untangle this story that I'm about to tell you, and then untangle why it's relevant to tbt.

[Luke Burbank]

Let's start with how many billboards there are outside. There happen to be outside of Ebbing, Missouri.

[Andrew Walsh]

So the. There was. You know that. That shooting in Seattle this weekend at an event called Bite of Seattle is incredibly scary and incredibly tragic because a bunch of people or several people died and a bunch of people were injured as well, and it was a shooting between. I guess. I guess it was one of those shootings where everybody was kind of shooting at each other. They were involved in the crime, but then there was like, you know, people who are caught in the crossfire. I just want to clarify, because you and I were talking off air recently about how it's being described as a mass shooting, which I think has sort of different implications. You know, like, specifically into a crowd, randomly.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know why that was something that I needed to, like, really obsess over early in the week. But, you know, like, a lot of people, I saw the headline. There's a. In fact, I think the first indication I had about this event was on TikTok, which. So strange.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't think of TikTok as being. And maybe this is just. I'm not on it that much in my algorithm when I am on it, but I don't think of that as a place where you get, like, breaking news. I didn't realize that could happen.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, what I get on there a lot is completely fabricated breaking news. They'll just announce the death of someone famous. You know, it'll just be a still photo of them and then some, you know, graphics or whatever. And I'll. I will. This has happened probably at least five to ten times now.

[Andrew Walsh]

Where.

[Luke Burbank]

Then I have to go. Have to go search it up.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

And. And go on the real Internet and see, like, did this person pass away? And it's never been the case. It's just purely someone trying to get clicks. But. But yeah, the other day, I did see a real human, and he was talking. And he was talking about this shooting in Seattle. And so then I. I went over and referenced it with, like, the Seattle Times and stuff, and sure enough, it had happened, and it was being called a mass shooting. And again, it's the least important part of the story, but I just felt like that was a kind of a misleading description. I know that mass shooting indicates there's

[Andrew Walsh]

some, you know, probably a definition that it.

[Luke Burbank]

There's. Yeah. A certain amount of people losing their life in a shooting event. Mass shooting does sound like somebody with a gun went to a place where there were a bunch of people and attempted to end as many lives as possible.

[Andrew Walsh]

And.

[Luke Burbank]

And right away from the scant details at the beginning, I was like, it's the bite of Seattle. There's a ton of people. They're looking for a couple of people. That sounds like two people shooting at each other, which is obviously no less sad for the People who lost loved ones in the crossfire or even the family members of the people doing the shooting. It doesn't change their grief. But mass shooting sounds like something different than a couple of young people making terrible decisions and taking shots at each other.

[Andrew Walsh]

I agree and I think that's an interesting conversation just strictly from sort of a media perspective, because I have, I haven't seen anybody having that conversation but you and I, because you brought this up to me the other day just sort of as sort of as an aside because it's going on in the world. And so we were just chatting about it and you had identified something that was sort of itching the back of my brain as well, which is from, from the moment the news broke and it was identified as a mass shooting, I actually felt the need to text my parents to say, hey, it's a little bit later where you are, but you're probably going to wake up to some headlines about a mass shooting at a big event in Seattle. Just want to let you know that I was not there. Nobody I know was there. And because, and the reason I felt the need to do that was because it was described. I mean, listen, again, as you just said, I mean people lost their lives. So I would want to maybe tell my parents that I was okay either way. But there is something about the term mass shooting to me that makes it feel more like the type of thing where somebody is intentionally firing into a crowd of unarmed people. But anyway, that is not why I bring all of this up. But obviously that news that that shooting happened on Sunday, it's the it and the fallout from it continues to obviously dominate the news cycle. One of the people involved in the shooting still has not been found. A big side part of this conversation though is that the relatively, relatively new police chief was not in town for this. Maybe he's been on the job for I feel like under two years. I could be wrong about that. His name is Sean Barnes. He was hired by the previous mayor and it was unclear whether or not the new mayor was going to keep him once she was elected. And she did. She ended up kind keeping him around. But I follow a journalist that you know, Luke, Erica C. Barnett, who writes for Publicola. That's her organization, that's her news organization. And for months and months, if not a year now she has been, she's kind of a left wing.

[Luke Burbank]

She's a long time police supporter though, right?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, she's a left wing kind of activist reporter but also a really good, I believe, fact based reporter as Well,

[Luke Burbank]

I think she's a very talented reporter. Very, very sourced in what she does.

[Andrew Walsh]

Very factual, very sourced and very thorough.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't always agree with it, but I will say it's good reporting.

[Andrew Walsh]

She is a. Yeah. And she's very, I mean, she just digs in and she just is constantly getting public records and digging and digging and digging. And I actually do agree with her most of the time. One thing that she had been really hammering on, though, that I didn't necessarily disagree with. I just didn't know that it rose to her level of ire or the attention she was paying to it. For again, months, if not a year now she's been writing about the police chief, chief's schedule because the police chief still, like, he never, like, it never felt like he fully moved here. His family is still in Chicago. His, I believe, wife and child or children still live there. He, he goes back there a lot. And so she's just constantly reporting on what his schedule says because that's public record. But then he was, he's always gotten touchy with her because he feels like he's being sort of targeted, which I guess he is saying, you know, like kind of accusing her of misreporting. And she's always saying, no, look, it's just schedule that your people gave me, like you're out of town in Chicago these days or whatever. But he is also known for when he's not doing that. He's going to a lot of law enforcement conferences, a lot of them, like

[Luke Burbank]

something trying to find a new wife,

[Andrew Walsh]

seven since like February, I think maybe I'm serious getting that wrong. But anyway, the reason he. And the thing is when you're reading about this kind of an abstract and I'm just reading Erica's posts about it or stories about it, I'm going to get, I mean, it's not a great look, but also, you know, you're the head of a huge organization. Like, there are a lot of people who are making the decisions on the ground. Like, I just didn't get my ire up about it. But when he was out of town at a law enforcement conference in Texas during this shooting and didn't make an appearance in Seattle until the next day, that really highlighted the situation. And then Erica's reporting started to be picked up by more and more people. And I know you saw this on TikTok or some clip of this the other day, a reporter, I think, from the South Seattle Emerald, but I could be wrong about the publication, asked the police chief about this like in a hallway, maybe at City hall or something. And the police chief kind of really got in this reporter's face in a way that his chief of staff had to like, sort of separate them in his defending of his honor and his schedule and why he has a reason to be out of town. And then that kind of blew up and the whole thing has just gotten really ugly. And the reporting today, even though it has not come from the mayor's office or the police department yet, is that Sean Barnes is out. He's been either he's been. What I have heard is that. And this is what's being reported, that he's been asked to resign or he will be fired. But that is not official yet. And once again, I would have to

[Luke Burbank]

say he's been asked to stay in Chicago. Where he was when he got the call.

[Andrew Walsh]

Exactly. So anyway, that is the background of the story, which started with a very tragic event that I had to begin the show with. One of the many reasons this was a bad idea. But you and I have this long running joke, a kind of joke reference to law enforcement conference, because of that movie, Three Billboards outside Ebbing, Missouri, in which one of the main characters, a police officer. Right. He's married to a woman with an Irish accent, but they live in Missouri. And you were just like, how does he. And she's in law enforcement as well. And you were just like. You were kind of incredulous about the movie and that sticking point that took you out of it. You're like, why? It's never referenced. This guy just has a wife with an Irish accent. And I was like, I don't know, man. Maybe they just met at a law enforcement conference. And I just thought that that was a totally reasonable thing to say. But for some reason it became. Maybe it's because we were actually kind of bickering about it. I don't know what it was, but that sort of became. Now whenever I hear law enforcement conference, I think about three billboards outside of Ebbing, Missouri. And now here we are.

[Luke Burbank]

Luke, I feel like you're surfacing this particular aspect of the Seattle story to prove to me that there are law enforcement conferences.

[Sir Ian McKellen]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Because I'm starting.

[Luke Burbank]

Message received.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. Because I'm still trying to win. No, it's just so funny. Cuz. It is. I mean, I was just. Everywhere I turn today, I'm just like reading. It's kind of like he was at a law enforcement. He was at a law enforcement. I'm reading this article. He's at a Law enforcement conference in Texas when all this happened. And he was at x many law enforcement conferences since January or something like that. And so anyway, it's just so funny to just keep seeing law enforcement conference. I'm like, maybe he met a woman from Ireland there.

[Luke Burbank]

Maybe that's what he's been doing. By the way, I'm going to come in with a bit of a spicy take.

[Andrew Walsh]

Careful though, spicy. Does this have to do with the 911 attackers?

[Luke Burbank]

No, although you also referenced that in our sound check today.

[Andrew Walsh]

You're dealing with, People know you're dealing

[Luke Burbank]

with a live stuff off air.

[Andrew Walsh]

You're dealing with a live wire today.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. Right now there are, I'm sure, exceptions and we're gonna, I'm gonna hear from people. I think that the actual value of going to a work conference is greatly overstated. There are exceptions. Sometimes you can learn some important stuff, Sometimes you could maybe make some good connections. But like, you don't need to go to multiple law enforcement conferences, even if you're a lonely heart. As the chief of Seattle police, I also didn't think it was a fair criticism initially. I didn't know about the law enforcement conference aspect of this seems to be

[Andrew Walsh]

a blind spot for you in general.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm putting a fourth billboard up outside of Ebbing, Missouri. You with a giant ghostbuster sign over over your face. I didn't know that part of it. And when I was seeing a certain amount of kind of like, you know, aftermath of this, of this violent event being about, like, you know, where was the police chief? I thought, well, like, it's Sunday and he doesn't have to be at the Bite of Seattle. But I didn't know there was like a kind of a long running thing going on where he is. He's maybe not even living in Seattle. And also he's going to a lot of conferences. I just think those are the kind of things that just. I think they're fun to go to because it's not your normal job. And again, there are examples where there is some professional development and some good, important stuff that can happen. But I do think if you are the police chief of Seattle, your more sort of prime directive is be around. So if something bad goes down, you can, I mean, you get paid presumably kind of a lot of money. It's a very important job. And one of the things that goes with the job is you kind of mostly need to be around. So when something unexpected happens, you can kind of be there quickly.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's why I say I wasn't all worked up about his schedule that much. I would read these pieces and I'd even think. And again, I'm a huge fan, a small supporter and a big admirer of Erica's work.

[Luke Burbank]

I thought you were going to say

[Andrew Walsh]

of law enforcement, of law enforcement conferences,

[Luke Burbank]

a small supporter of law enforcement conferences,

[Andrew Walsh]

and your contributions to the show, Luke. I'm a big supporter of those as well and a big fan. But anyway. But as more and more articles kind of came out about this, again, I was just sort of having trouble kind of thinking or caring about it that much. It seemed like this is one of those things where Erica was sort of like a dog with a bone on it, right? Just like you just won't let it go. But I gotta say, with all of this news and the fact that he was gone during this event, it's kinda like, oh, yeah. And I think I'm agreeing with what you're saying, if not just restating it. It's like, well, that is why you need to be here. So before this tragic event on Sunday, for me, just an average taxpayer in Seattle or whatever, I'm not like seeing the chief of police around town anyway, you know what I mean? Like, whether or not he's at a law enforcement conference in Tallahassee or in, you know, on a zoom call with his team from Chicago, it doesn't feel like it really affects me that much. I'm not going to really worry about it that much. But when you do have events like this, which luckily have been very, you know, few and far between in Seattle, but you're absentee, and then you look back at this idea of it kind of like feels like, do you really live here? Are you really part of the community suddenly? That does matter to me more, I would say. And by the way, I know that you know that I'm going to record a KOW later today. This is not. I'm not using this as practice. I do not think this is a topic that's going to come up on the show. I think we're talking more about Blue Angels and more fun stuff than what I'm bringing.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, are they intentionally avoiding this?

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, I don't know. Now that this breaking has happened, about the potential resignation or firing of the police chief, maybe they can't avoid it, but the podcast I'm going on, the whole point of the Friday show is to try to be a little bit lighter. And so they even said earlier in the week, we're going to see how the news develops and hopefully the topics for the show that I'm supposed to go on, which we'll record today and we'll post tomorrow, called Seattle Now, I think it's going to be more like, how do you feel about the Blue Angels? Because I think that's happening this weekend, more like lighter fare. Although at this point, kind of waking up today and seeing this news, it's a little bit hard to. It's hard to imagine not talking about the police chief, but I guess we'll see.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, it seems like a pretty big story out there.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Did I see a headline, too, that there's something about the Blue Angels that's not gonna be as Blue Angel Y.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, that was a total you. That's another, like, Seattle Times, like, bullshit headline. I mean, yes, there's one thing that's changed Seattle headlines yesterday. The day. I'm sorry, Seattle Times yesterday or the day had one of those headlines that said, there's something different about the Blue Angels appearance this year, which was, as

[Luke Burbank]

far as I investigated them.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. And it's one of those things. It's like, why don't you just say what the whole thing with the Seattle Times now is they. Their headlines are specifically, if not misleading. Like they're, as they apparently say, hide the pickle. They don't give you any information. You have to click through. They become very beloved.

[Luke Burbank]

Navy flying group is 50% off, including home delivery.

[Andrew Walsh]

And it through. It frustrates me so much. But anyway, the headline was that something different is happening with the Blue Angels performance this year. The only difference, and you had to go, like, halfway through the article to get a quick mention of it, is the Fat Albert plane like, the. What is that the refueling plane? You flew in that, didn't you? With Bob, with Dave Ross or.

[Luke Burbank]

No, no, I think it was a different one. But I do know what the. Well, again, you probably remember better than I did. I went and I think I went in some kind of airplane.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right, but you went into some Fat Albert. The Fat Albert. And what is the Fat Albert?

[Luke Burbank]

That's like a big search up Luke Burbank, Fat Albert.

[Andrew Walsh]

What do you think's gonna happen, Luke?

[Luke Burbank]

Hey, hey, hey.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's what I was gonna say to you, but I wasn't gonna do the voice. I do remember we were gonna try to get you into one of the actual Blue Angels, I think, because you were working for the commercial station at the time, and we couldn't get you into one of those. But I thought that they gave you the other flight on Fat Albert. But maybe they are you finding anything from our old Cairo days? Does it say that you find.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm googling myself. Excuse me? I'm searching myself up and it says, why the Blue Angels aren't worth the traffic headaches from my northwest dot com. That's me. Okay, I'm being quoted. Oh, this is Stephanie Klein.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right. Speaking about something you said on the show and turning it.

[Luke Burbank]

It's hard to argue. The Blue Angels screaming across Lake Washington in perfect formation isn't breathtaking. This is. Oh, I see they did a survey of the Cairo hosts. Dori Monson was a fan, as you might imagine. Luke Burbank. I friggin love the Blue Angels.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah, you do.

[Luke Burbank]

There's something visceral about the Blue Angels flying overhead. I feel a physical response in my chest of happiness. It really regresses me to being like a four year old. Although that all changed for Luke on Thursday when he was stuck on the 520 bridge during the I90 closure. But no, I'm not finding. I'm not finding me in whatever that. But that's.

[Andrew Walsh]

That here's a minor. No, but I have found a MyNorthwest.com article that's called the View from Burbank Roof Studios. Did we get them to write up our little adventure on your roof, or is this a different one?

[Luke Burbank]

Jamie Griswold was maybe even at the house for that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, interesting. So this wasn't the TV maybe even taking that photo? Okay. No, no, no. When it was you and me. I know it was just you and me on the roof. Jamie Grisold wasn't there, but maybe she. Oh, no, no, no, no. This is it. The photos aren't on anymore, but this is a blog post that they wrote about our experience. Can I read this to you, please? This week, the Blue Angels are in town. We decided it might be fun to do the show from the roof as they were flying overhead. There was just one problem. It turns out Andrew is very, very afraid of heights. And again, this is not tbtl. This is the Ross and Burbank show. Right. And then there's a missing photo. Says that's why he needed to lie down at the beginning of the show. Then the Blue Angels roared by. Missing photo. And Andrew was forced to move back to his, quote, auxiliary recording station, which I believe was hanging out your bedroom window. Right. Still, it was super fun for us. Sorry, it was probably not particularly fascinating audio content, but what else is new? Because I do remember grabbing that sound of you and me on the roof and playing it. You know, we played it for Dave on the show, I believe.

[Luke Burbank]

So what is the actual story of what is going to be less whatever

[Andrew Walsh]

about the Blue Angels? There was just one mention that said Fat Albert is like, Fat Albert won't be there. He's not going to be there because it's being repaired in Germany or something like that. It was literally one sentence in the this article that had nothing to do with that headline.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, that is a little. Because if you tell me that there's a problem with the Blue Angels or there's going to, they're going to be less fearsome or spectacular, I'm not thinking of their much more slow moving cousin, Fat Albert. Yeah, that comes swooping through before they come through. He's not a Blue Angel.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, that's like it is a tradition. I do think that it shows up with the Blue Angels, like every event.

[Luke Burbank]

Very much so. And I like it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Don't get me wrong, you know, been

[Luke Burbank]

out in my boat bobbing about on Lake Washington watching that Fat Albert just

[Andrew Walsh]

rumbles in like rowdy to Lez.

[Luke Burbank]

But oh, great rowdy to Lez reference. He got DFA'd, by the way.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Was that a while back or was this.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, it was a couple months ago. You hate to see a rowdy to Lez dfa. But no, I mean, I do love that thing, but I just feel like saying the Blue Angels makes me think it's one of the like five or six of those, you know, particular kinds of jets, not, you know, something in the overall kind of air show of it. I was wondering about this going into Seafare weekend. Oh, by the way, speaking of, you sort of side referenced it about like another annoying Seattle Times headline. I wonder if you were referring to something you and I talked about off air that I was a little bit creased about, which was like the fact that in the wake of the events at the bite of Seattle, which again, very tragic, but not something that if I lived in Seattle would make me feel like it was a public safety hazard, I guess, to go to seafare. I would not be personally concerned about going to seafare and being in a crowd based on what had happened the previous weekend. Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

You wouldn't be and I wouldn't be. But if I'm being totally honest about it, if you think about the readership of the Seattle Times, they're reaching probably a lot of people who live outside of Seattle and have ideas of Seattle becoming a dangerous city. And I could see some of them being like, I don't know, should we go to Seafare? Do you think that's totally out of line. And I don't like that attitude, by the way. I think it's bs But I could see the Seattle Times reaching people who are kind of like, eh, I don't know if I feel like going into the city for this. There's already going to be a headache with the traffic that those Blue Angels. Cause if I remember Luke Burbank's quote correctly.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, it just was one of those things where I felt like this headline was something to the effect of. And it may have changed, you know, how again, these things also change over the course of the day. So I think I might have seen an earlier one than what you saw.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, no, I saw it. I'm sorry, I'm not defending the headline. I am defending the idea that there probably some people who maybe feel differently about. About seafare now. But the headline itself was. Was total bunk.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, it was something, but you're going to. So here's. Here's what the headline was that I saw. It was seafare organizers assure that they have a plan for safety.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, I'm sorry, we did see different ones. I saw one. Regarding the CEO, you informed me about

[Luke Burbank]

the fact that the person in charge of seafare also apparently was in Las Vegas when that very, very, very upsetting mass shooting event happened that did cause a tremendous loss of life. And that somehow, because that person. Because she was there in Las Vegas, that's gonna. Somehow. I guess the gist of the story was that she's better equipped to run seafare, which is if you don't live in Seattle. It's like the big summertime kind of festival. There's some parades associated with it. There's hydroplane races, which I do think you would love, Andrew.

[Andrew Walsh]

I know. I can't believe I've never seen kind

[Luke Burbank]

of a speed demon. I think you get a kick out of those hydros.

[Andrew Walsh]

More ways on, by the way. Sorry. Sorry to disagree with you when I was wrong. Yeah. The headline I saw, I thought we were vibing. I thought we were negative vibing off of the same bad headline. But the one I saw was, and I'm looking at it now, Seafare weekend festival security shaped by CEOs mass shooting survival. And I was. I didn't understand that headline and I had. So I opened and I read it and it realized that the seafare weekend. I'm sorry, the Seafare CEO had been at that Vegas shooting that you were just referencing.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. The version that I saw was basically, I Felt like the Seattle Times trying to. Again, I don't want to assume sort of ill intent or whatever, but it seemed to me like somebody was trying to think of the next story to write about the thing that happened at the Bite of Seattle. And look, honestly, I guess it is a natural next story, which is like, hey, there's another big, huge event happening next weekend. What are the implications for that event based on what just happened? So. So here I am talking myself into why that actually wasn't a terrible idea for a piece. But again, it just feels like this kind of hand wringing about something that is very sort of impossible to predict and very hard to prevent unless we were to get actual real meaningful gun control this country. Like, the idea of like, we reached out to the Seafarer organizers and they said, like, we feel like people are going to be safe at Seafare. Well, first of all, you don't know that that's impossible to guarantee. And again, my personal feelings about my safety of going to Seafare would not be impacted by what had happened at the Bight. I don't know, it just felt like one of those nothing stories that you see on local television or maybe even hear on certain Seattle talk radio stations where it's like, okay, this thing happened, this tragedy at the Bite of Seattle, and now we have to take that and we have to pick every little, you know, piece of that apart and keep making content out of it. Which truthfully, what I said to you off air the other day was I feel personally relieved that you and I don't currently host a talk show together at Cairo Radio because I'm assuming that all week this has been the main top of topic of conversation. It's one of those topics that I just think it's really difficult to create very much light around. And I don't mean the police chief and the police chief's schedule, but just the like. Like a tragedy happens where people lose their lives and it should have never happened. And then it's like our job to make three hours of radio out of that.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

And like, that was really what kind of drove me out of the business was just those kinds of events, you know, school shootings and the like, where it's like, well, now we're just shifting to rolling coverage on this, but we don't know anything.

[Andrew Walsh]

We don't know anything more. And like, so. So let's. Let's talk about this police chief thing, right. That we started the show with. It was your idea. Weird way to start the show, but okay, it's already out there.

[Luke Burbank]

So I said, if we don't get one law enforcement conference reference in today, I'm walking.

[Andrew Walsh]

It was such a strange meeting today. But anyway, I hear this news. This news started rumbling late last night before I went to bed again. I think about the police chief. About the police chief, yeah. And I think that it was Erica Barnett again who maybe had the scoop on it. She had a couple of anonymous inside sources saying that a meeting had been held with the mayor between the mayor and the police or whatever. So I go to bed thinking, like, oh, this is, you know. And I got to say, when it comes to, like, news stories, I am attracted to palace intrigue in maybe a way that I shouldn't be super proud of. But that is the kind of stuff that kind of, like, you know, kind of titillates me journalistically. And. And so when I woke up this morning and then the Seattle Times has the story, and then I'm listening to kuow, and they're just giving. There's not that much information out there. So I just get a little bit of an update here. Sounds like a little bit more of a confirmation here. And then they had a little bit of breaking news on it. But there's not a lot to really have. There's just not a lot of information to turn this into more than an update here and there. But me, as a news consumer who is interested in this palace intrigue, I was literally thinking when Kow went to some sort of long segment where people were literally reading, I guess, letters that they wrote to bodies of water around Seattle, that's the thing that Kow was doing today. I was just kind of like, I don't want to be listening to your poems about water right now. I want to know what's going on inside city Hall. Like, just put a reporter. Put a reporter inside city hall with the cell phone and just, feed me, feed me, feed me. I just don't want to hear about your relationship with the Salish Sea right now woman who hosts silent discos on the beach once a month, which is literally what I was listening to. And so. But the thing is, that's me as a consumer wanting that information, but also as a. As somebody who has a brief familiarity with the news industry industry. I also understand that it's not responsible to just keep it 247 rolling coverage on this breaking story when there's nothing new to report, because that is when you get into speculation, and that is when you're like, well, we got to get another person who's going to speculate on this or throw stones about that, you know, so it's like it is this balance that I think news organizations have to think about, or even I don't even consider Cairo really to be a news organization anymore, but let's say a content organization. Like, how much do you think of

[Luke Burbank]

it more my place to find.

[Andrew Walsh]

And lawyers for men, are they for divorce or what? Are there any clinics, Are there any clinics that men can go to if they were interested in clinicking up? Anyway, you see what I'm saying, though? It's like I'm almost hypocritical about it from a news consumer standpoint. And what is responsible news coverage?

[Luke Burbank]

Well, to use a weird analogy, and one that'll sound like we're not doing justice to the seriousness of the topic. Sort of like for me, when, you know, the Seahawks win a big game and I turn on sports radio, that's all I want to hear them talking about is the Seahawks. It's like I want to hear them reflecting back to me the thing that I'm currently obsessed with. And if you're currently obsessed with the, you know, the news, the news story about what's going on in city hall with the police chief, then yeah, you'd want to hear that. You know, it sounds like. And again, this is, I'm just learning all of this this morning from you, but. But it sounds like this is one where it's very possible that this is all happening because of Erica C. Barnett's reporting. Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

That feels like it to me. But you gotta keep in mind you're hearing this from a very specific point of view as somebody who probably reads her stuff more than the average person and gets her articles directly emailed into my inbox. So I kinda see it more than the average person. So maybe other people were banging this drum, but it seems to me that she's been the kind of lone voice on this. And now that you have this event where he didn't show up, the police chief, that it does sort of, I find it hard to argue that it's not her story to begin with.

[Luke Burbank]

Right. Because if there's not this kind of, like you said, drumbeat of stories about like, hey, what is this person's schedule? Where does this person live? Is this person around enough to do the job? If you don't have all of that leading up to it, if this is literally just like the first, like, hey, there was a terrible event and the police chief was out of town, that's one kind of story. But it's like. Like police chief who's been notably out of town, a lot is out of town during a thing that we needed him here for. That kind of feels to me like this is probably, you know, it's so rare in this day and age that independent journalism, and I'm being serious now, can actually kind of make a difference.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Luke Burbank]

Seems like it's making a difference and

[Andrew Walsh]

kind of keeping kind of playing the long game. I mean, this is where you also get into. This is also where I think you get into some sticky issues that maybe we should just moved on before I open this can of worms. But think I. But I do feel like there is something that goes on with investigative journalism that I feel like I've witnessed firsthand at kind of state and local levels, inside newsrooms, which is like a sense of pride when somebody resigns based on your reporting. Right, sure. And usually, I mean, I think you can justify that. You can say that's because this person was misusing power or misusing the office or doing something untoward in some way and therefore didn't deserve their position of power anymore. And we ousted them.

[Luke Burbank]

We held them accountable.

[Andrew Walsh]

Held them accountable. But when that sort of, when you're somebody who has a very specific point of view on issues in the city and then uses your reporting to sort of raise awareness of them. And again, as I keep on saying, sort of bang a drum, it can get a little bit dangerous if you're just kind of like, I'm going to keep banging this drum until I create so much problems for this person that it's just easier for the city to part ways with them or however it turns out. You know what I mean? Like, and for me personally, not that it really matters, my opinion on the chief of police. I don't have any inside knowledge of him. And like, again, I get all my information from the Seattle Times and Erica C. Barnett and NPR or whatever.

[Luke Burbank]

I get all my information from the Seattle Times headlines.

[Andrew Walsh]

You get all your information from.

[Luke Burbank]

Gives me a limited amount of information.

[Andrew Walsh]

Me reading the Seattle Times and listening to poems about the water on Kow. And then I report it back to you.

[Luke Burbank]

But that's what I want to talk about that in a minute.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, cool. I was being a little bit harsh there. But anyway, I do think it can be a little bit of a dangerous game if you're just trying to get somebody fired. And it's kind of like, well, this is. Is maybe more based on your political leanings. And in this case, again, I see eye to eye With Erica on most issues, especially because she does a lot of reporting around homelessness and poverty issues and the city safety net and all of that kind of stuff. And she does a lot of hard work on that. And it's an issue that's important to me and important to the city. I think the Sean Barnes thing, that's the name of the police chief. It always seemed to me, I'm kinda like, yeah, I mean, it's not ideal, but he did not seem like a bad guy to me. You know what I mean? He seemed like a guy who, I think we've all known bosses or have had bosses like this. It's like the person who comes in who's very focused on conferences and conference culture and just might not be the most effectual person in the world, but not necessarily ineffectual and not problematic in any way. And so I've just never had this fire in my belly about, yeah, this guy, we gotta get him out of town. I felt that way, very much so about previous police chiefs here in the city that had to do with their handling of police response to protests, tests and stuff, and, and deleting text messages that should have been public information. Like, I've had very strong feelings about police chiefs in this town. Sean Barnes, I have not had. He just seems like a guy who's like, yeah, he's kind of just probably a guy who really does like glad handing and going to conferences and doing that. But it doesn't necessarily mean he's a

[Luke Burbank]

fan of Hilton Garden in.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sure, why not? And also, you know what I mean? And again, it might not be the best look and it certainly isn't when the, when, you know, when the crows come home to roost. Is that the expression? But what comes home to roost, Luke?

[Luke Burbank]

Chickens.

[Andrew Walsh]

Do the chickens come home to roost? What are the crows doing in this situation?

[Luke Burbank]

They're memorizing our faces and plotting our ultimate demise and passing it along across generations.

[Andrew Walsh]

When the crows come home to memorize our faces and then pass them along to future generations and there's an event like what happened this weekend and the police chief isn't there, it is bad. And you understand why that kind of lifestyle is not great, but I just don't. I never felt like he was an especially, especially like bad, problematic, toxic guy. I felt like he was actually a very. From my very distant perspective on reading, he seems like a very well meaning guy who came from a smaller police force, I believe, in Madison, Wisconsin, I think, and took over a larger police force. But A police force that needs, frankly, good energy and good vibes here in the city. And he seemed like he wasn't necessarily counter to that.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, the. The thing that I thought was that I wanted to circle back to about the water poetry is. The funny thing is the reason that I sometimes have a hard time listening to public radio these days is because there's not enough water poetry. And I mean that sort of figuratively. Like, what I'm realizing in this particular era of life that we live in in America, is that so much of what I hear on public radio, particularly the stuff actually coming down from the network, it's not even really at the, like, station level as much as it's the network. It's just kind of reciting awful things that are going on, related to Donald Trump, but not providing a lot of, I don't know, editorial. I mean, I know that NPR is very nervous about, you know, being seen as. As editorializing on things, but it's like, just feels like they're just standing next to a house that's on fire and going, this house is on fire every single morning. And, and it's like, well, can we get a hose? Can we do something? And there's something like, you know, when I watch Chris's show on Ms. Now, it's the same stories. And granted, they're doing a different kind of thing on Ms. Now than they do on npr, but it's like, there's something that is calming to me, or I listen to the pod Save America guys. There's something that's calming to me about, like, you know, people saying, yeah, this house is on fire and here's how we got to put it out. Or here's a part of the house that's maybe not on fire right now. And this is why we should feel some optimism around it. It's. It's like npr. It feels to me because npr, because of their mission of really trying to be neutral, but also really trying to cover the news, is just dispassionately giving me the worst updates of all time. And what I find myself missing is like, Andre Kudrescu.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, right.

[Luke Burbank]

Baxter Black. Stuff that is just like. And just stories about nothing. Like things that I used to cringe at that were on public radio because they were. Were so not part of the news of the day and were so just kind of like, woo, woo, and whatever. Like, I would love my message to the, you know, whoever runs NPR these days is bring back more cowboy poetry and also water poetry, as Wonder Bread did involve machetes table saws, piano wire, laser beams. Can you imagine two bakers and a candlestick maker trying to mash a wad of dough through a harp? Or the grill of a 53 Buick? Or a window at Alcatraz? Unwrapping nature's goodies has always tested the ingenuity of man, be it coconuts, spuds or watermelons. But there are still several seemingly simple tasks that require considerably more effort than their benefit seems to warrant. Dentistry, for instance. Or peeling the shrink wrap off of CDs, maybe sharpening a paring knife. I'm getting some ideas from an ex. Commentary.

[Andrew Walsh]

A little, little vitamin baxed.

[Luke Burbank]

Love me some Baxter Black. I was trying to find some Kudrescu on the fly. Here we go. Here's from. Do you remember him too?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Who I think lived in New Orleans. Here's a headline for you. Google is back. Google backs a new digital world. But what about the real new world? Google is investing in a startup called Improbable.

[Andrew Walsh]

The stated goal is to create digital simulations of real cities, economies and biological systems.

[Luke Burbank]

This made Romanian born commentator Andre Codrescu

[Andrew Walsh]

think of life under communism and that

[Luke Burbank]

dream of a new world. When Putin's hackers intervened in our democracy, Stalin stood up from his grave and applauded.

[Andrew Walsh]

Putin did what Stalin couldn't.

[Luke Burbank]

If Stalin had had Internet, he'd have

[Andrew Walsh]

built the communist dream of a new

[Luke Burbank]

world with a few keystrokes. Instead of starving and killing millions of people. Putin a would be Stalin with Internet hacked. I swear to God, that guy's voice.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

I can't remember if we were talking about it off air, on air, or on a future program, but like things that just make us feel nostalgic and cozy and safe. Hearing that guy talk time travels me back to being like 22 or 23 years old. I'm working at KUOW. I'm probably not. I'm probably working at Metro Traffic Control, but I'm going into KUOW to steal free books and resell them at half price. Books on Roosevelt. And I'm hearing Andre Kudrescu and it's like just I have my whole life unfolding in front of me. It's like a very calming, very comforting voice to hear. And I would like more of that. Even if it's poetry is about the Salish Sea.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, me too. I was being a little bit rude about that. And also I know that somebody who we know and like and that I work with is actually one of the people who is producing that too. So I feel a little Bit bad about dunking on it, but I think I was using it specifically. It was kind of cringy. I mean, it was actually well edited, but it's also just sort of cringy. Some parts of it were more interesting than others. But by the way, just. Can I add one more voice to the mix of our Wayback Machine here?

[Luke Burbank]

Here, please.

[Andrew Walsh]

Some she stole from roadside construction sites,

[Luke Burbank]

and some are plastic rocks molded to

[Sir Ian McKellen]

look like granite boulders.

[Andrew Walsh]

I have been working on my soil for years, digging in shredded leaves, making compost and planting. Looking at your face right now makes me think that maybe you were not a Bailey Whitehead.

[Luke Burbank]

I had a lot of Whitehead. She was at the time that I was listening to Andre Kudrescu.

[Andrew Walsh]

Bailey White was doing a lot of commentary around the same time as Kudresti.

[Luke Burbank]

I remember hearing the name I love Bounce Around. But yeah, that was the time. I would like. Again, I'm just repeating myself. But what I would really like the people in charge of NPR to do is like, just give us, if you. Can we get an 80, 20 going? Can we at least get 20% meaningless cringe, old school NPR stories about butterflies and, or, I don't know, cicada emergence or something. Can we just go back to some of that?

[Andrew Walsh]

Or the cellophane on CDs?

[Luke Burbank]

I mean, they're so hard to open.

[Andrew Walsh]

They really are. You need one of those special little devices. Did you ever have one of those devices? I never had one. I feel like parents had them. They would go to a law enforcement conference, right. And come back with, like, some sort of like little, like CD opener blade thing that has, like, had a little

[Luke Burbank]

kind of razor blade. Speaking of public radio, I feel like that was somehow like public radio stations that specialized in music, like, so if they were, you know, that was the primary focus or whatever, they were big on printing those up, like making those and then giving those out at the prpd.

[Andrew Walsh]

I had, like, I think I finally got rid of it. But I had a Mountain Stage branded chapstick roll in my desk like, for years. And I think. I think I got at a conference with you years and years and years ago ago.

[Luke Burbank]

Was that the, like, that's sort of a public radio music show out of like, sort of Appalachia. Right.

[Andrew Walsh]

Why did I think it was out of Colorado? I thought I felt like it was.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, because the word mountain is in there.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's probably. Why was it out of Appalachia?

[Luke Burbank]

You're probably right. Let me see.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know. I don't know if it's still going on. But yeah, it was like a live music show. It was almost like, it was almost like A Prairie Home Companion if it was all music. But that was like kind of the vibe right down home.

[Luke Burbank]

Yes. And I know that Chris Thy used to host it sometimes. I know that my CBS nemesis, Connor Knighton, I think hosted it for a while. And I say nemesis because he is also works on Sunday morning but is more motivated, more handsome than me, which is kind of everyone at this point and way better at the job of being a CBS correspondent. But people do sometimes switch us up in their mind because we're like 50ish year old white guys of a certain, you know, comportment. Looks like they're still doing the mountain stage.

[Andrew Walsh]

And you're right about Appalachia's West Virginia Public Radio. You're absolutely right. I was letting the mountain cloud my vision.

[Luke Burbank]

The mountains win again. In the words of John Popper from

[Andrew Walsh]

Blues Traveler, is that a song or is that just something he said when he was driving his truck full of vans across the pass?

[Luke Burbank]

His truck full of vans?

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm sorry, I meant his, his van full of guns. Nevermind. Didn't he get in trouble? Didn't John Hopper get in trouble for driving a van full of guns across like.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, because he was, he like lived in this is, you know, Blues Traveler. The, you know the guys that did Hook and what's the they've got a bunch of big, big hits. But he's a harmonica enthusiast. And then yeah, he moved to like Issaquah and then there was some story where he like, like a armory going on out of his place. I don't think he, I don't think he threatened anyone, but it was like a weird amount of guns for someone.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I feel like he got pulled over in a van that was like chock a block with guns, which is

[Luke Burbank]

just something like that. But he does have a song called the Mountains Win Again.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, I didn't know that. I wasn't really. I only knew what was that one that would have been on the radio or did you have to have a.

[Luke Burbank]

It would have been on the CD. Speaking of opening CDs and cellophane and the like, it would have been. I think I'm. Well, I wanted to blame this on Columbia House, but I don't think that's fair. I think I went out and of my own volition and my own money, bought a Blues Traveler CD of sound

[Andrew Walsh]

mind and sound body.

[Luke Burbank]

I do solemnly swear that I, Luke Burbank, did Voluntarily purchase the Blues Traveler CD that includes the song the Mountains Win Again. No, that song. Hook. And then what was the other big one?

[Andrew Walsh]

Give me the run around. Or is that hook? Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

No, you're right. Run around.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, then how did Hook go?

[Luke Burbank]

The hook brings you back. I ain't telling you no lie. And it has this really fast part. Suck it in, suck it in. If you're in Tintin or Anne Boleyn, make a new and then begin to see what you're doing. To me, this MTV is not for free. It's so PC, it's killing me. So desperate. I sing to the avalanche love. I'm getting really into We Didn't Start the Fire territory. I'm hitting about one out of every nine words. But. But I did. I did like the music of Blues Traveler back in the day. But, yeah, they have a song called the Mountains Win Again.

[Andrew Walsh]

Hello and welcome to Top Story.

[Luke Burbank]

I remember seeing something bouncing around. Might have even been tick tock about this sort of a couple of journalists in, I want to say, like, Connecticut or something, who were in it with ebay. And I feel like they were putting out these posts, and I thought, these people are completely crazy. Like, you know, they're just obsessed with this thing that they think ebay is doing to them.

[Andrew Walsh]

And it's.

[Luke Burbank]

This has got to be like a delusion in their own mind. And then I saw this article in the New York Times yesterday, which give me a moment, because, of course, the mountains win again. Andrew, I don't have the right version of the New York Times going for myself here. I'm gonna have to try to log in.

[Andrew Walsh]

Just gonna log in. Do you want me to. Is David Stratfeld, who wrote the piece for the New York Times. I know you like to give credit to the writer of these pieces, and the headline is couple stalked by ebay. Settle for $56 million, and I'll just buy you a little bit more time here. Luke, I'm glad that you started there, because when I saw this article in the show sheet today, I was like, whoa, that is a blast from the past. Because I vaguely remembered talking about some story where there was some couple, and I don't even know if I remember they were journalists, started getting, like, weird, macabre things sent to them from ebay, right? And it seemed like a weird thing, and I. I didn't realize that it went all the way to the highest rungs of power at ebay. I thought it was just some maniac in, like, the shipping room at eBay being weird for some personal vendetta. But apparently this was actually. It wasn't. It was because these reporters were uncovering things that the. What CEO of eBay didn't want uncovered.

[Luke Burbank]

The journalists in question, and thank you for buying me that time, were based out of Massachusetts, and their names are David and Ina Steiner. And they run some kind of, like, website that writes about, I guess, Internet stuff. And many years ago, I think that they were. Let's see. In a brief, the Steiner said the case was never just about money. One of their goals was to raise an alarm. In the spring of 2019, eBay was under pressure from an activist hedge fund. A handful of Ms. Steiner's articles, including one about a bar that the CEO of eBay at the time, a guy named Wenig, had built on ebay's campus, infuriated company executives. This is some real Erica C. Barnett territory. And everything comes back to one muckraker today. One muckraker can make a difference. So they had this. This woman, Ina, had written an article about ebay having a bar on the campus. And this infuriated company executives, according to texts that were later revealed. And then this person, the CEO, who eventually had to step down over this, said something which is later on in the article, basically said, end them or something to that effect. Like, told this kind of, like, private security force that ebay had hired to, like, take these people out. And so, yeah, they went. They, like, mailed them boxes of cockroaches. They did all kinds of crazy stuff,

[Andrew Walsh]

funeral wreaths and other things that made them sort of seem like vaguely threatened.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, they were. I think what happened was this was uncovered. Like, the totality of this kind of stalking project was uncovered right before these, like, private thugs were gonna go over to the house and, like, break into the house of poor Ira and. Excuse me, Ina and David, who are just writing their little, I assume, fairly inside baseball articles about the fact that ebay has a bar on the campus.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, I'm glad that you remembered this as well. Cause I was like, man, I remember this story, but we had it so wrong that this was like an actual coordinated campaign from the top of ebay. And now this guy, I can't remember his name, the CEO, or whatever his title is, is no longer with ebay. Dave.

[Luke Burbank]

Devin Wenig.

[Andrew Walsh]

Devin Wenig is the former CEO, but even though is a former CEO is being personally held responsible in the settlement. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Kind of what he said, by the way, was, take her down. And then he said, do whatever it takes. Which is not ominous at all. Although later on he claimed, and he is officially on the record as saying he had nothing to do with this, except for the part about saying, take her down and whatever it takes.

[Andrew Walsh]

I mean, and the fact that he was petting a cat with his big iron fist at the time really made it seem more ominous.

[Luke Burbank]

The fact that he was inside a island hideaway shaped like a human skull and he was in the left eyeball of it petting a cat.

[Andrew Walsh]

And when he laughed, his laugh would echo and birds would fly out from

[Luke Burbank]

the trees kind of seems to belie this idea that he didn't order this thing. Yeah, he was actually being held personally financially responsible to a small degree. I think it's maybe one and a half million dollars he has to pay, which I think is actually being donated to local journalism. I'm not even kidding.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, I see. So he's only responsible for a small part of this.

[Luke Burbank]

He's responsible, yeah, for a tiny amount of. Well, relatively tiny. But to the credit of the Steiners, it sounds like what they said to him was the money that. Yeah, let's see. The former ebay chief executive, Devin Wenig. You shouldn't be allowed to have the first name Devin if your last name's Wenig just because it's too close together. It's just too weird.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's too many letters that I'm not used to.

[Luke Burbank]

Thank you. Devin Wenig and two other former colleagues will pay the couple a total of $2.5 million. Mr. Wenig will also. Okay, I had this slightly wrong. Will also pay $1 million to a charity dedicated to protecting First Amendment rights in the name of Ina Steiner.

[Andrew Walsh]

The announcement said, we need that. We need the organizations that are supporting First Amendment rights. Let's all donate a little extra to them these days.

[Luke Burbank]

But it's like it never ceases to amaze me how myopic people in positions of power can be about websites, including one called e commercebytes.com reporting on them makes an impact on the wider culture. I can't tell you how many people I've even interviewed through maybe my CBS stuff and other stuff, where it's like somebody has a pretty big deal down at the cracker factory. And they also are in the comments of like every article that's written about them. Like, and they're very, very concerned about how certain kind of coverage is going to go, even coming from very, very sort of like low traffic websites and stuff. And it would just seem like if this Devin Wenig guy would have just realized that e commerce bytes.com Writing about the bar on the ebay campus was not going to have a widespread impact. You know, it did have a widespread impact. You hiring a bunch of thugs to send them cockroaches.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's almost like a darker version of the. Of the Streisand effect, right?

[Luke Burbank]

What's the Streisand effect? The song Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith.

[Andrew Walsh]

Wait, more on that.

[Luke Burbank]

What a moment.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

I consider that the ultimate Streisand effect.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, you tell. You tell me that and I'll look up to make sure I get the Streisand effect. Right. But the general idea of the Streisand effect is there could be a small non news story, but then if you. Somebody with a big megaphone, try to slap back at it as Streisand did in some sort of famous event that I can't remember the name of the.

[Luke Burbank]

Was that about her dogs being cloned?

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't think so. I think it might have been before that. But it basically means, like, no. Instead of fighting back at this, all you've done is let the world know about this thing. The world wouldn't have known about otherwise. So I'm going to look up the specific Streisand effect. You tell me why you're talking about Eric Aerosmith.

[Luke Burbank]

You know, Aerosmith has that song Don't Want to Miss a Thing that was on, I believe, the lesser of those space movies where we have to go knock a space rock down.

[Andrew Walsh]

Right.

[Luke Burbank]

There was a period of time where Americans couldn't get enough films about crack teams of non astronauts who have to go into space and try to save humanity. I think there was like, Deep Impact and then there was a different one.

[Andrew Walsh]

Armageddon, maybe.

[Luke Burbank]

Armageddon.

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't know. I've never. What? There's like, yeah, three very, like now iconic, kind of the world is in danger movies that came out around that time. And I get them all confused. I've never seen any of them.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm thinking of Mars attacks. No, I'm kidding.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. We come in peace. That was my favorite moment of that movie. Okay, so what's the connection then?

[Luke Burbank]

So Aerosmith did this song, Don't Want to Miss a Thing, which is like, you know, even when I dream of you, the sweetest dreams or whatever. I. Again, this is not my day for lyrics. I apologize, but they wrote this. The song was written by a woman named Diane Warren, who's actually a very, very prolific songwriter and has Written many, many hits Diane Warren has. And she wrote the song and Don't Want To Miss a Thing based on watching an interview between Barbra Streisand and James Broland, her husband or her partner, where James Broland apparently said, when I'm lying in bed next to Barbra Streisand, I don't even want to go to school, sleep, because while I'm sleeping, I'm missing the amazing thing that is Barbra Streisand.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, my God.

[Luke Burbank]

And Diane Warren is watching this interview, and she thinks, isn't that a sweet sentiment? And so she writes this entire song, I Don't Want to Miss a Thing.

[Andrew Walsh]

I Don't Want To Miss a Thing.

[Luke Burbank]

Based on. That's a pretty decent.

[Andrew Walsh]

Well, I just wanted people to hear what it sounded like.

[Luke Burbank]

And. And. And so that is. So I think of the Streisand effect as being the song Don't Want to Miss a Thing because. Because if not for she and James Broland, we would not have the musical miracle that is Don't Want to Miss a Thing.

[Andrew Walsh]

Here's the thing about the Streisand effect. The way I described it was generally correct, although less articulate than it is here in Wikipedia, where it says, the Streisand Effect is a phenomenon in which an attempt to hide, remove, or censor information results in the unintended consequence of the effort, instead increasing public awareness of the information. So that's what I was trying to explain to you. I got it right.

[Luke Burbank]

You're correct.

[Andrew Walsh]

The origin is just really boring. It has to do with a photo of her, like, has it with a guy named Greg Streisand, some sort of estate that she had, like, on the edge of a cliff in Malibu. And there was some company that was taking photographs of the coastal waters for something unrelated to, like, privacy. But she, like, sued to get the photo removed from the project or something because it showed her estate. And they were like, no. But she ended up just, you know, creating way more attention to these photos of her estate. I don't. I don't even know. I don't think they were, like, saucy photos or anything. I think they were just of her estate. Although I could be wrong about that.

[Luke Burbank]

She just, like, prizes her privacy or something and wants some. She said something else that, at the time bothered me. It might bother me less now as it relates to home improvement, because she. When she's not trying to get them to take down photos of her estate, she was also doing interviews and, like, you know, Architectural Digests and Other magazines because she, you know, had this phenomenal home which she had designed herself and had been, you know, designed to her very specifications. But I remember reading some interview with her, and it must have been around the same time that I was trying to fix up some house that I lived in, But I was the one doing all the, like, tearing down the drywall. And she just was talking about all the work she did on this house so extensively. And with, you know, I mean, I feel pride around some of the remodeling projects that have happened here at my house that I didn't actually, like, swing a hammer on. So I think I can maybe relate to it a little bit more now. But at the time I was like, we need rich people to stop talking about the remodeling projects that they paid for as being the remodeling projects that they did. I mean, again, they were in charge of it. It wouldn't happen without them. But it's like there was something about the way that she was describing. I was like, well, if you have a billion dollars, you can get a lot done. Like, I don't know. I'm not that impressed with somebody who's just super wealthy and they just kind of like get their house made all nice.

[Andrew Walsh]

As somebody who just recently failed at having somebody else do a home rental project, like. And I. I didn't try to swing a hammer at all in that. And. And we now have a half completed. We now have a half completed kitchenette with a sign over that says mission accomplished for some reason.

[Luke Burbank]

So maybe Brownie.

[Andrew Walsh]

Maybe. I understand.

[Luke Burbank]

Can I improve your mood by reading you a quick list of the songs written by Diane Warren? Because there are some bangers.

[Andrew Walsh]

Do I have to sing a little? Do I have to sing the chorus of each one or the. Absolutely.

[Luke Burbank]

Do I love this? You have just improved this game by 150.

[Andrew Walsh]

If not, we gotta do blurs days. It looks like we probably don't have time for this right now, you know. Okay, go ahead.

[Luke Burbank]

She wrote right Way to Rock, by the way.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's crazy.

[Luke Burbank]

Top of the list, High Decker cover of the Diane Warren song if I Could Turn Back Time.

[Andrew Walsh]

If I could turn back time.

[Luke Burbank]

Beautiful.

[Andrew Walsh]

Thank you.

[Luke Burbank]

I think it's actually going to really be in your wheelhouse because these were all just like chart toppers of the 80s and 90s.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

Look away by Chicago.

[Andrew Walsh]

Look away, baby. Yeah. I'm kind of.

[Luke Burbank]

If you see me walking by and the tears are in my eyes look away, baby look.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's actually. I heard that. That sounds like, maybe I heard it at the grocery store or something recently. It seems like a grocery store song. I actually love that line. I'm not a big Chicago fan. Is that Chicago? Did you say it's Chicago? Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

As written by Diane Warren, Though that's

[Andrew Walsh]

where some of our better police chiefs are from.

[Luke Burbank]

If you see me walking by on my way to a law enforcement conference,

[Andrew Walsh]

the way to booth 35.

[Luke Burbank]

And if we meet on the street someday and I don't know what to say look away, baby, look away don't look at me I don't want you to see me this way. That's kind of heartbreaking because it's total. It's a total. I mean, that seems to be a theme, right?

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

If I could turn back time yeah, if I could find a way I'd take back those words that hurt you

[Andrew Walsh]

and you'd stay yeah. I like this songwriter.

[Luke Burbank]

Is that the one that. She's on the aircraft carrier?

[Andrew Walsh]

I believe so. Yeah. That's a super horny, super gay coded video. Yeah, exactly.

[Luke Burbank]

She is. She's on an aircraft carrier with a hundred of the straightest US Sailors you've ever seen.

[Andrew Walsh]

And she's, like, wearing, like, practically nothing with.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, okay. So if I could turn back time, look away by Chicago. Because you loved me.

[Andrew Walsh]

I can't help you with that one.

[Luke Burbank]

You gotta help me with that Celine Dion.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, that's. I don't know any Celine Dion.

[Luke Burbank]

I know the tune, but not the lyrics. My sister Hannah is gonna kill me.

[Andrew Walsh]

Sorry, Hannah.

[Luke Burbank]

You gave me something when I couldn't speak. You da da something when I couldn't be. God, this is terrible. And the chorus is because you loved me, but sung much better because it's sleepy on.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that doesn't. How.

[Luke Burbank]

How do I live. Leanne Rhymes?

[Sir Ian McKellen]

Yeah.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, no, I don't think I know it.

[Luke Burbank]

Leanne, how do I live without you?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

Again, part of a theme.

[Andrew Walsh]

Leon Rhymes.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay.

[Andrew Walsh]

All right.

[Luke Burbank]

How do I live when you up? How do I ever, never survive? It's a little out of my range. How about When I see you smile by Bad English?

[Andrew Walsh]

No, I. If I'm sure I know it, but I'm not calling it up.

[Luke Burbank]

When I see you smiling I see a ray of light I see it shining right through the rain. That's a bad English version of a Diane Warren song. How about I Don't Want to Miss a Thing by Aerosmith?

[Andrew Walsh]

I don't want to miss a thing. I gave it even more English that time. Bad English, but I gave it more English.

[Luke Burbank]

So, yeah, that's the work of.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's it. That's the end of the list. Okay. I'm really sorry that I faltered there. Yeah. I wasn't trying to let you down. Down.

[Luke Burbank]

No, no.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's another song that she wrote.

[Luke Burbank]

I wasn't trying to let you down. Popularized by Laura Brannigan.

[Andrew Walsh]

Hell, yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

There's a right way to rock and

[Andrew Walsh]

a wrong way to roll?

[Luke Burbank]

You can just listen to your song? Just remember that life is number one? You can be having so much fun?

[Andrew Walsh]

Just remember that there is life is much fun?

[Luke Burbank]

You can be nothing but one.

[Andrew Walsh]

Whoa. Luke, what happened? I pulled the music down too far. Sorry. That was more dramatic than I meant it to be. I had prepared all of the blurs days last night in a very unusual state of preparedness. I don't usually do that. And I just was like, maybe I should just check, make sure that none came in overnight. And they did. So I'm gonna grab a couple more here.

[Luke Burbank]

Nice. Better safe than sorry.

[Andrew Walsh]

Absolutely.

[Luke Burbank]

Thank you for your dedication.

[Andrew Walsh]

Let's see here. So I need to grab this one. How are we doing on time?

[Luke Burbank]

You know, can I buy you.

[Andrew Walsh]

Please do. Yeah. Because I realize one of these is way too long. Yeah, go. Go ahead.

[Luke Burbank]

Actually, you know what? This is far too far in advance. I. I knew that I had a couple of B days on my calendar coming up. Our friend Toon has a birthday. It's a golden blurs day, though. It's next Thursday.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh.

[Luke Burbank]

So we're way ahead of the curve. And then my niece Maddie of the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, where you can see her play this August in Edinburgh. She has a birthday next week as well. On the.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay, I.

[Luke Burbank]

Do you want me to sing more dynamic?

[Andrew Walsh]

No. Now I'm struggling because there's a story that I think is really funny, but I don't know if I should really tell it. It's a little bit telling a tale out of school. And I know that one of the people involved listens to the show and will hear me say this, but I think it's okay if I just keep Toon's name associated with it, but I leave all other names anonymous. A friend of ours gets the whole gang together at his family's cabin, which he's allowed to use, like, one weekend out of the summ and at a lake somewhere, and he gets a whole bunch of us to go out there. And I got to say, for the past several years, I have not. I've stayed back and done yard work and hedge. Big hedge related projects. Or whatever. I don't like spending the night at places. I hate you because you. Look, it's not true. I love everybody who goes. I just don't want to spend the night at a place. So anyway, all of that is to say, tune in.

[Luke Burbank]

You and I sit in a car and listen to a Mariners game.

[Andrew Walsh]

No, you're incepting a memory that I had with my friend Neil. That was one of my favorite moments.

[Luke Burbank]

You're high in a car listening to the Mariners game, and I'm stealing your memory.

[Andrew Walsh]

Neil were like, we couldn't get reception. You can't get cell reception to listen on your app. And the transistor radio inside the cabin wasn't working. So we just went out to my car and listened to a few innings of a Mariners game several years ago. And then I happened to have a joint. I don't know, dude. It was just like high school.

[Luke Burbank]

Fully grand theft memory.

[Sir Ian McKellen]

You.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm glad you caught me, dude.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm glad you broke.

[Luke Burbank]

I feel really bad.

[Andrew Walsh]

Grand theft memory is also a possible showtime.

[Luke Burbank]

Sorry that I tried to steal your life experience.

[Andrew Walsh]

Anyway, so. Oh. The story I was in the middle of telling was. So Toon is one of the main people who always goes to this thing and it always sort of. It sort of doubles as a bit of a birthday celebration for her as well, because around that time. And so even though. And by the way, I'm the one who looks the worst here because I haven't been going for years, and that's very ungracious of. But tune always goes. Tune will. Sometimes.

[Sir Ian McKellen]

It's funny.

[Andrew Walsh]

In fact, last summer, Luke, I was on my way back from buying twisted teas at sars. The gang was all going out to the cabin. It was a Friday night, and a car slowed down behind me, and it was Toon. She had to stop in the neighborhood for something before she was heading out to the cabin.

[Luke Burbank]

Was buying a tremendous amount of soda.

[Andrew Walsh]

Or was that a different time? That was a different time. But it was. I'm just remembering this now because I remember thinking. I think. I think I was drinking the twisted tea because I was like, I can't go to the cab and I got stuff to do.

[Luke Burbank]

And then you're caught red handed sauntering down Aurora with a twisted tea in your hand.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes. But anyway, the story this year is. And I hope this is okay to tell this story. Apologies to all my lovely friends if this is untoward of me to share. But Toon sent a note to the gang this year saying, hey, listen, I'M really sorry. I appreciate the invite, but I can't make it this year. I'm traveling for my birthday. Cause it's a big birthday.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. I'm seeing that on Instagram.

[Andrew Walsh]

And she said, I'm trying, but this was like, maybe, you know, more than a month ago. This was maybe two months ago when they're planning it. And our friend who hosts the event says, no problem at all. Where are you going? And she was like, I don't know yet. And there was something so funny to me. And just knowing my friend, I was like, I don't know if that's gonna sit well with my buddy who's kinda like, you know, again, graciously hosts this thing. I'm sorry, I can't come. I'm traveling. And where are you going? I don't know yet, but definitely not to your place. But it's very understandable, though. I mean, she's probably, you know, like, she's with her family, like, planning something. They didn't have the details locked down, but they know they wanted to travel for her birthday. That's totally reasonable. But I just knew that it was just gonna come off kind of funny in the text.

[Luke Burbank]

That played out exactly like I would expect it to. Between those two individuals. Knowing both of them and loving both of those individuals.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yes.

[Luke Burbank]

I actually, you know what? I have to say, I appreciate the honesty from Tune.

[Andrew Walsh]

Me too. Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

You know.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

And that's what I would have done.

[Andrew Walsh]

I try not to lie about that shit either. I just tell people now, like, you know what? No, I want to get a bunch of yard work done or whatever it is. I don't like to find the night places. Like, it doesn't mean I don't love my friends.

[Luke Burbank]

I just say the first thing that comes to mind, and then I have to go there. Romania. All right. Going to visit Andre Kudrescu.

[Andrew Walsh]

That sounds like fun. All right, let's reset here. This is why you gotta listen to the Blurs days There's little gems hidden inside little tea spilling the crows come home to roost the crows come home to identify our faces Sarah says we've got a 5's 9th birthday happening this week. Amelia is a lifelong TBTL listener and even appears at times in an opening sound clip. We'd love to have you remind her how proud we are of her and how possible it is that she gets some of her great humor and thoughtful analysis from you and Luke. I mean, nine years times 260 shows a year. She's about, what, 2,340 episodes deep. Yikes. Happy birthday, Amelia.

[Luke Burbank]

I will absolutely take the credit for everything cool and funny that Amelia says. Yeah, none of her bad renditions of Diane Warren songs she does not get from old unky Luke.

[Andrew Walsh]

Amelia's going around making law enforcement conference

[Luke Burbank]

jokes, trying to explain to the other

[Andrew Walsh]

kids at school, Amelia, you're not allowed to listen to this show.

[Sir Ian McKellen]

Okay?

[Luke Burbank]

Are you familiar with the work of Frances McDormand?

[Andrew Walsh]

Phil in Broadview says Oliver, Elliot and I are jazzed to shout out our Prime 10 Sarah on her special day. It's so fun keeping our family on the rails with you. You giving six gallons of gratitude to a five gallon bucket as we are re baptized in the ample bosom of. I don't know how to say this. Is this the lake that is impossible to pronounce? It's spelled C A, N A N D A I G U A. I

[Luke Burbank]

think you're thinking of Lake Char Gog. A gog matchog Shao Boona Gunga Mog.

[Andrew Walsh]

I'm gonna assume that it your family can't wait to celebrate you and wrap up the summer with cocktails held high. Saludos.

[Luke Burbank]

Nice. Keep it on the tracks, guys. Keep it on the tracks.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, look at that. All aboard. Jackie. Our pal Jackie says I'd like to send a special blurs, a shout out to my girl Tracy. Her blurs day is Sunday and she is one of the best tens I know. Tracy, absolutely. Hope you have an amazing day, friendo. Hope to see you soon. Tracy, Happy birthday.

[Luke Burbank]

We love Jackie. We love Tracy.

[Andrew Walsh]

Absolutely.

[Luke Burbank]

Love all of it.

[Andrew Walsh]

Tracy made a special necklaces right for the bead party.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, Jackie was there as well. I'm legally, and I mean this in every sense of the word, I'm legally obligated to point out that Jackie justice is an attorney who works for justice, who works for people who need access to the legal system and is needed named Jackie Justice. I will never fully recover from that information.

[Andrew Walsh]

I know Jackie plays a lawyer on BoJack Horseman and her name is Jackie Justice. Right.

[Luke Burbank]

Not to be confused with Jackie or

[Andrew Walsh]

Jackie Jump, who we did not name our dog or Dane. Okay, now, I didn't even realize this. I'm rearranging things because now I'm seeing how there is a. What do physicists call it? The unification theory. We have some unification theory.

[Luke Burbank]

Oh, unified field theory.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, we have some unification unified field theory going on here. Nice, Tracy. Here's Tracy P. Now, who was just receiving some blurs day saying happy birthday to my favorite birthday twin, Jackie Justice. Oh, come on. Who knew TBTL would pair me with someone who has such impeccable timing? Literally. Here's to another year of laughs, funny pictures on Facebook and proving that sharing a birthday is the ultimate 10 thing ever. Leo's rule. Happy cake from your pal Tracy. Cute. And I realize we have another one.

[Luke Burbank]

I did that because Leo's. Leo is a lion. Small lion.

[Andrew Walsh]

Interesting. Ben says it's that time again for the blursi that's cooler than the other side of the pillow. A listener of OG Duarten fan. Your single most loyal fan back from 2008. She was there 3,000 years ago. I may be biased though. I want to send a blursday shout out to Tracy. Look at all of the love.

[Luke Burbank]

Hold on.

[Andrew Walsh]

Raining down in this community. She's bold, she's beautiful. She'll kick your teeth in if you're mean to people. Seriously though, she is maybe literally the sweetest person in the world. A true mensch in all of the best ways.

[Luke Burbank]

Remember you sounded for kicking in teeth.

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, needed. Oh, no, those were my teeth.

[Luke Burbank]

At least using a sword. In that case.

[Andrew Walsh]

Hey, remember Keith from Chardon, Ohio, who came to the frog jump a couple weeks ago? Keith says would like to wish. I guess it says keith from Chardonnay, Ohio here would like to wish his amazing wife April a very wonderful, fun and relaxing Blurs day weekend. You're an amazing person, wife and mother. And I'm so fortunate to be your husband. You're always game for my crazy ideas like driving across town to visit a frog jump festival. Love you so very much.

[Luke Burbank]

I don't know if this is a place for it, Andrew, but you know, we got some tea by Keith and April that they shared with me. And everything that you share with me at a quasi listener event of TBTL becomes public record.

[Andrew Walsh]

It's on the record.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah, they went, I believe, to their high school prom with different people.

[Andrew Walsh]

What?

[Luke Burbank]

And then I don't know how much canoodling happened, but they. Their eyes. I'm making up this part of the story, but their eyes locked across the dance floor in that gymnasium. I assume the theme was under the Sea or some other prom like theme. And they ended up. They fell. They fell madly in love at the prom that they went to with different dates.

[Andrew Walsh]

Really scandalous.

[Luke Burbank]

Scandalous. It was the scandal of Chardon, Ohio. Which is a pretty good Mark Twain

[Andrew Walsh]

book, I was gonna say. It does sound like a book. It sounds a little bit like a mystery maybe. Anyway, April, happy damn birthday. And I'm not apologizing for swearing. Happy golden blursday to my mom, Madeline. Over all these 46 years, one thing has always stood out. Your determination, your kindness, and your unbreakable will. Through diagnosis and losing our feathered friends, you and dad have always been been a supporting pillar through me and dad's darkest times. So thank you, mom, for all your support and wishing you a 46th Blurs Day. Love, August, dad and the Critters.

[Luke Burbank]

We have a significant number of Augusts in our listening.

[Andrew Walsh]

We do audience. Yep, yep.

[Luke Burbank]

We've got a Gus. I think we've got an Augie or two. We've got an August. I think we've got a couple of Augusts.

[Andrew Walsh]

Very, very popular name.

[Luke Burbank]

Yeah. With our listeners. There's something about the kind of people who like this show that tend to name their children August.

[Andrew Walsh]

And also my colleagues, my friends and colleagues in New Hampshire that I left behind when I moved out here. They were babies named Gus at the time. And now, of course, they are driving cars. They might even be driving flying the Blue Angels this weekend. They're so old now. I don't know.

[Luke Burbank]

Incredible. Did you know in that other side of the pillow, that's a Stuart Scott Reference from SportsCenter?

[Andrew Walsh]

Oh, no.

[Luke Burbank]

I did about that all the time. He sadly has passed away. Stuart Scott. But he was an anchor on SportsCenter and he used to say when someone did something really good in the game, he would say cool as the other side of the pillow. And when I sometimes in the summertime flip the pillow over at three in the morning, it's a great feeling of Stuart Scott. I've never flipped a pillow over so as to find a cooler side of it and not thought about Stuart Scott in the last 20 years.

[Andrew Walsh]

That's legacy, right? That's serious. I don't care.

[Luke Burbank]

What's our legacy gonna be? I don't want me singing Diane Warren.

[Andrew Walsh]

I just want everybo to. I just want everybody. When and if and when I pass on, I want somebody to delete all of the TBTL archives and just forget about.

[Luke Burbank]

I just want to say for the record, this show does not count as part of my legacy.

[Andrew Walsh]

Okay.

[Luke Burbank]

Okay. This episode.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah, that's. Oh, just this episode. I thought you only TL. I was like, that's just.

[Luke Burbank]

I'm talking 4782.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah.

[Luke Burbank]

There's other ones I feel good about. This is just not one of them.

[Andrew Walsh]

Yeah. I gotta say, when we started the Blurs day segment and we were getting credit for forming and help helping shape young minds, I went back Amelia's mind. I went back to the beginning of the episode and I thought, yeah, I really should have started on a different topic. Really started on a different topic. Sorry, Amelia.

[Luke Burbank]

Well, thank you to all of you for listening to this episode today. We are going to be back here tomorrow. We're going to try again. You know what? It's nobody bats a thousand. Okay? So we're just going to get out up. We're going to step up to the plate tomorrow and unlike Cal Raleigh, we're going to actually deliver. Okay? We're actually going to.

[Andrew Walsh]

We're going to ref Schneider the hell out of tomorrow's show.

[Luke Burbank]

They don't come back. Right, Andrew? I've always said that. I've always said that about Rob ref Schneider. Yeah. We're back here tomorrow with more imaginary radio. So please, if you can join us for that. In the meantime, everybody have a great Thursday. Take care of yourself. Happy blurs day to everybody out there. And please remember, no mountain too tall.

[Andrew Walsh]

And good luck to all. Power out.