Tell 'Em Steve-Dave! – Episode #666: "Hell Is Empty And All The Devils Are Here"
Release Date: February 23, 2026
Episode Overview
Episode #666 is a special, unfiltered celebration of all things devilish, marking the most metal episode number possible. Bryan Johnson, Walt Flanagan, and Brian “Q” Quinn (with familiar voices and recurring guests) dive into religious symbolism, Satanic lore, biblical trivia, wild games, and true(-ish) supernatural stories, all wrapped in the classic irreverent, sharp, and chaotic TESD banter. Special features include the dramatic return of the Baron (Bryan’s bizarre alter ego for random facts), the Overkill Maestro, and a devilishly fun round of "Which Bible is it Anyway?" – plus a high-stakes liar's game about a supposed dance with a demon.
Key Highlights & Segment Breakdowns
Opening Banter & Setting the Scene
[00:43-05:44]
- Bryan, Walt, and Q begin by riffing on the significance of the number 666, quickly establishing satanic, blasphemous jokes (“You think the Holy Bible is all about cock size and semen load?” – Q, 00:43).
- The return of "the Baron”: Bryan brings the character back, vowing to recite devilish facts every six minutes in true episode 666 style.
- Running joke: With multiple phones dead/charging, Get 'Em (longtime show lackey) fails his “thunder stick” duty to provide sound effects for the Baron’s entrances.
“How the fuck are seven phones dead at the same time? How is that possible?!” – Walt, 04:23
Why 666? The Biblical & Historical Breakdown
[05:57-07:47]
- Baron Fact #1: Bryan explains the 666-Nero connection, with plenty of irreverent commentary:
- “The number 666 is associated with the devil from Revelation 13:18... interpreted as a code for Emperor Nero.” – Bryan, 05:57
- Walt and Q riff about Roman decadence, death, and why being emperor (even “orgies every day”) would ever end in suicide.
Game: "Bible or Satanic Bible?"
[09:16-22:37]
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Walt invents a quiz where Bryan and Q must guess if passages are from the Holy Bible or the Satanic Bible.
- Notable over-the-top verses about “donkey-size genitals and horse emission” turn out to be biblical.
- The trio laughs at the graphic and bizarre content found in both texts, noting that the real Bible is often more hardcore than the Satanic one.
“There she lusted after her lovers whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like those of horses.” – Walt, reading Ezekiel 23:20, 15:04
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Baron Fact #2: "Devil’s food" (chocolate cake) explained.
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Riffs on Bible content, hypocrisy, and the surprising commonality of violence and lust.
The Nine Satanic Statements: Agree or Disagree?
[22:31-32:48]
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Walt quizzes the group on Anton LaVey’s “Nine Satanic Statements,” exploring whether any “Satanic” philosophy is actually relatable.
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The gang debates indulgence vs. abstinence, repentance, vengeance, and whether it’s actually Satanic to “only be kind to people who deserve it.”
- Q makes the case for the “Catholic get-out-of-jail-free card” of confession:
“You just get to do what you want…and you got this gigantic eraser that makes everything go away if you’re just like, ‘I’m sorry.’” – Q, 25:52
- Q makes the case for the “Catholic get-out-of-jail-free card” of confession:
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Ultimately, several “devil’s advocate” points are surprisingly relatable—prompting jokes that maybe the gang are more Satanic than they realized.
Modern Satanic Panic
[34:16–35:16]
- Discussion on current events (Epstein files, Hollywood, Super Bowl, Olympics) being linked to “Satanic” rumors, contrasted unfavorably with “cooler” 1970s Satan, who “just makes kids smoke pot in the woods.”
- “This rebooted Satan is really harsh.” – Bryan, 35:04
The Overkill Maestro Returns – With a Possessed Nun Story
[49:57–59:57]
- Overkill Maestro Tom brings his best: the infamous 1600s mass possession in Loudun, France, where nuns claimed to be tormented by named demons, and a local priest was tortured and executed.
- Tom details the sadistic tortures, alleged contracts with the devil (written backwards in Latin), and competing theories: “mass hysteria” vs. conspiracy to silence a progressive priest.
- The crew debates whether mass possession was genuine or a product of hysteria and power struggles.
- “You know how religious you gotta be to do that?” – Walt, on torturing the priest, 59:11
Game: Devilish Liar’s Club – “Who Danced with the Devil?”
[63:49–126:46]
- Bryan presents three guests (Brian Michelle, Jimmy the Hair Guy, and Rob Rupp), two tasked with bluffing, one with telling their true supernatural story.
- Premise: 20 years ago, each claimed to have called themselves God and was then tormented by demonic phenomena (haunted TVs, choking, doors slamming, voices, etc.).
- After thorough, laughter-filled cross-examination, debating the believability of their details, Jimmy is revealed as the real “dancer with the devil.”
- Notable comedic skepticism:
“You’re hanging it all on a door slam, TV malfunction, and what sounded to me like a panic attack…” – Q, 120:29
- Q and Walt deeply dissect who could have concocted what tall tale, with recurring jokes about “making girls come like God” and Staten Island locations.
- Notable moment: The detective work from the crew as they try to suss out details, motivations, and holes in stories.
Aftermath, Bonus Questions & Quickfire Quizzes
[131:02–142:06]
- Bryan reads off answers from the show’s participants to questions like “What one thing would the devil use to tempt you?” (ranging from “spicy chicken sandwich from Checkers” to “grant me the ability to redo moments of regret”).
- A “devilish” personality quiz: Each guest’s partner describes them as a horny, mischievous, or ornery devil, with much self-deprecating and couple-focused humor.
- “Right at this current moment, you’re an ornery little devil. But I wish you were a horny little devil.” – Mrs. Jimmy the Hair Guy, 140:04
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “[666]...Is there any more metal number than that?” – Walt Flanagan, 02:03
- “They must be shot, stabbed, burned, smashed, drowned, or rent.” – Walt, reading, 20:10 (practically indistinguishable from normal Old Testament rules)
- “Devil’s food cake: The name originated as a playful, dark contrast to angel food.” – Bryan (Baron Fact #2), 11:38
- “Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven.” – Walt, quoting Paradise Lost, 18:24
- “The deal is that was the Baron’s play on words. Tit. Babylon also means tits. The Babylons. She’s got nice Babylons.” – Bryan, 22:02
- “I might be a Satanist.” – Q, jokingly casting his lot for Team Devil, 30:37
- “You just get to do what you want…and you got this gigantic eraser that just makes everything go away if you’re just like, ‘I’m sorry.’” – Q, 25:52
- “[Satan in pop culture]...This new, updated, rebooted Satan is just…with kids and I don’t like that.” – Bryan, 34:49
- “They just want to dance a jig on all of their downfalls.” – Bryan (about Satan returning in the news), 35:38
- “Not a single embellishment or lie. Every word of this is 100% true.” – Jimmy the Hair Guy, 125:44
- “I think you better start going to church, you know…He stepped in for you when you needed Him the most.” – Bryan, closing the show, 142:26
Timestamps for Important Segments
- [00:43] First “cock size and semen load” joke — setting the episode’s tone
- [05:57] Baron Fact #1: Why 666 is “the devil’s number”
- [09:16] Start of "Bible vs. Satanic Bible" game
- [15:04] Incredibly graphic Bible verse about donkey genitals
- [22:31] The Nine Satanic Statements quiz and philosophical debate
- [34:16] Modern Satanic Panic segment
- [49:57] Overkill Maestro’s possessed nuns story
- [63:49] Kickoff: "Who’s the real dancer with the devil?" game
- [120:29] Q and Walt’s deduction and winner reveal in liar’s club
- [131:02] Quickfire “What would the devil use to tempt you?” game
- [140:48] Wives/partners call in to name their man as devilish (“horny/mischievous/ornery”)
- [142:06] Closing round – Jimmy declared the real “dancer,” lessons learned… or not
Tone, Style, and Takeaways
TESD #666 is a boisterous, boundary-pushing romp through religious myth, sleazy history, and personal confession, all filtered through a lens of skepticism, blue humor, and quick wit. The hosts push each other’s buttons with gleeful disrespect for all things sacred and profane. Segments are lively and interactive, often devolving into hilarious sidebars, pop culture references, and Staten Island “guy talk.” If you’re a fan of irreverence, meta-jokes, and turns from thoughtful to totally outrageous, this episode is a must-listen.
Perfect for TESD fans, curious newcomers, or anyone with a devilish sense of humor looking for the show’s most supernaturally charged, blasphemous, and laugh-packed episode ever.
