Tell ‘Em Steve-Dave! #672 "Now, You’re Fabio" – Detailed Summary
Podcast: Tell 'Em Steve-Dave!
Episode: #672 Now, You’re Fabio
Release Date: April 6, 2026
Main Theme / Purpose
This episode captures classic Tell 'Em Steve-Dave energy—irreverent, candid, and full of banter between the Comic Book Men alums and Q from Impractical Jokers. The crew riff on aging bodies, discuss Q’s upcoming cruise event “Q-West”, debate the meaning of fame and recognition (focusing on the New Jersey Hall of Fame), and, naturally, end up talking about Fabio and sex health statistics—all with typical self-deprecating wit.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Body Talk: Aging, Health, and Bathroom Habits (00:06–07:19)
- Spring Allergies & Changing Bodies (00:06–02:22):
- Q’s battling spring allergies, and the guys discuss how allergies come and go every 7 years ("Your body will soon change and you won't be allergic to it anymore." – B, 01:36).
- Hydration & “Breaking the Seal” (02:22–05:04):
- Classic TESD over-sharing: How many times do they pee daily? Reference to Gidham’s computer stat ("For most adults, urinating six to seven times... is considered normal." – A, 03:34).
- Humorous musing about weak streams, "name-writing" in snow, and adult diapers for the dog's sake.
- Prostate Health & Frequency (17:32–19:34):
- They joke about the findings that frequent ejaculation reduces prostate cancer risk.
- "At least 21 times a month." – A, 17:51
- "What happens if you don't?" – B, 17:59
Notable Quote:
“I’ve taken to wearing adult diapers because Teddy gets too nervous when I leave his side.”
— B, 04:06
2. Q-West – The Cruise Event and Beer Pong Rivalry (07:19–13:40)
- Q is excited about Q-West, especially the heavily hyped beer pong tournament rematch with Joe DeRosa.
- “We’re making banners. I just chose my entrance song today. Yeah, I’m pretty excited.” – C, 07:31
- Rivalry: "He’s a cruel, condescending, arrogant winner..." – C on DeRosa, 08:48
- The match is staged, with boxers’ entrances and live cameras.
- Pinball Competitions: Stern Pinball is providing machines, with high scores winning a signed Lego DeLorean.
Notable Quote:
“I would put both you guys in a fucking beer coma with my beer pong.”
— B, 07:46
3. Pinball Culture and Lacking "Flare" (11:31–15:37)
- The nostalgia of pinball, the “flair” of 70s arcade experts vs. Q’s self-proclaimed lack of skill:
- “For a guy that owns as many pinball machines as I have, man, I am no good at the game...” – C, 12:59
- The performative way of slapping the machine, reminiscing about childhood aspirations versus reality.
4. Impractical Jokers: “Number One!” + Sex & Prostate Health Banter (16:45–21:39)
- Q’s TV show is officially the #1 original cable series, but he downplays the impact.
- Walt and Bryan riff on health: "Masturbate frequently... at least 21 times a month." – A, 17:32–17:52
- The gang debates effectiveness of bunching all ejaculations into one or two days for health, with heavy innuendo and incredulity.
Notable Quote:
“So could you do three times in one day and that counts in the right way?”
— C, 19:11
5. Fabio as Epitome of Masculinity; Aging & Pop Culture (20:13–26:57)
- The trio reminisce about Fabio, his legendary hair, the infamous “goose to the face” incident, and his romantic icon status.
- Tasteful ribbing about how many women masturbated to Fabio in the 90s.
- Modern-day Fabio: "He looks like he's lost some of his teeth though..." – B, 21:23.
- Fabio’s health-routine and the difference between “Lamborghini” genetics and average mortals:
- “We weren’t all given the keys to a Lamborghini.” – C, 26:57
6. Hall of Fame Snubs & The Nature of Recognition (32:13–45:56)
- Mary Beth points out to Bryan that he and Walt were left out of New Jersey Hall of Fame, but Ernie O'Donnell (“Kevin Smith adjacent” carpenter) made it.
- The group launches a classic, escalating bit regarding criteria for fame and recognition in NJ:
- “I mean, I think having a TV show for 7 years should make you of note.” – A, 38:15
- Walt speculates: “I don't know if it's a Hall of Fame worthy life...”
- Discussion on how TV fame isn’t as significant as it once was, and how charity work and a “squeaky clean” resume may be more important for institutions like Halls of Fame.
Notable Quotes:
“If there was a Hall of Fame of my heart, that’s the only place I need to be in.”
— C, 42:43
“He keeps beating up the coach, keeps beating up the fans. He's not allowed within 100 yards of a fucking Little League game.”
— C/B, 52:02
7. On Cats, Bonds, & Pet Rejection (31:57–36:16)
- Bryan vents about his younger cat’s coldness while the older cat is lovingly clingy. Q (the “cat man”) advises Bryan to try catnip and bribery, and jokes that maybe he just needs to get yet another cat.
8. Live Shows, Awards, and Legacy (60:02–66:43)
- Ideas for the TESD Awards resurface: would they fill the Gramercy Theater or Count Basie?
- Roasting Q for "pricing out" friends at his last live event.
- Jokes about awards, “hologram inductees,” and paying to win recognition at the New Jersey Hall of Fame.
- Plans for Key West trip, with promises to come back with wild stories for the listeners (“ants”).
Notable Quotes:
“What’s greater than fucking only selling 10% of the seats, right?”
— B, 63:13
“You guys gotta come back, too, with some good stories... stories that are gonna knock people for a loop.”
— B, 64:39
Memorable Moments & Quotes
- Drool & Pinball:
“He looks so much different on tv. He doesn’t make those noises.” (15:37) - Fabio’s Goose Debacle:
“That was the Fabio who got his nose broken by that bird on the roller coaster.” — A, 20:50–25:38 - NJ Hall of Fame Bit:
“It’s not a carpentry hall of fame... It’s a hall of fame for Notable Notable Industries.” — A, 41:16
“But should a whole wing [be] devoted to it in the hall of fame, though, with 16 bronze fucking busts?” — B, 49:45
Key Timestamps
| Segment | Timestamp | |---------------------------------------------|--------------| | Aging, pee talk, and health | 00:06–05:43 | | Q-West cruise, beer pong, and pinball | 07:19–13:40 | | Impractical Jokers cable #1, sex humor | 16:45–21:39 | | Fabio: aging, pop culture, and masculinity | 20:13–26:57 | | Pet rejection & cat advice | 31:57–36:16 | | NJ Hall of Fame debate/bit | 32:13–45:56 | | TESD awards, live shows, legacy | 60:02–63:41 | | Concluding, live event plans, signoff | 64:39–66:58 |
Tone & Language
The episode is rich with classic TSD banter: self-deprecation, quick-witted sarcasm, off-color humor, and a conversational intimacy that feels both confessional and absurd. The jokes shake out organically, often spiraling from a simple question into elaborate hypothetical bits. The interplay of boastful and self-loathing moments keeps the humor relatable and earthy, driven by the trio’s chemistry.
For New Listeners
- You’ll get a healthy dose of real-life aging humor and bodily squabbles.
- Expect a sprawling, heartfelt discussion on what makes someone “famous” and worthy of recognition.
- The podcast flows through pop culture, obscure trivia, and their own personal gaffes, making the episode as much about middle-aged friendship as anything else.
- All delivered in the distinctly irreverent Tell ‘Em Steve-Dave style.
Closing Reminder:
Stories from the cruise and Key West event are promised for future episodes. As always, the ants can expect “stories that are gonna knock people for a loop.” (B, 64:40)
Signature Sign-Off:
“Tell ’Em Steve-Dave!”
