BEST OF: Kevin Nealon on His Career in Comedy!

Summary

The Al Franken Podcast

BEST OF: Kevin Nealon on His Career in Comedy!
Released: May 31, 2026

---

Episode Overview

This "best of" episode features a lively, anecdote-packed conversation between Al Franken and his longtime friend and SNL colleague, Kevin Nealon. Together, they reminisce about their overlapping years on Saturday Night Live, classic sketches (like Hans and Franz, Mr. Subliminal, and the Chippendales audition), the quirky realities and personalities behind the scenes at SNL, and Kevin’s career trajectory as both a performer and a producer. The discussion is wide-ranging, mixing nostalgic comedy shop talk with deeply personal and often hilarious stories—offering a masterclass in comedic attitude and timing.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. SNL Memories & The Art of “Attitude” Comedy

• SNL Casts and the Show’s Evolution:
  • Kevin and Al discuss the transitions between the various SNL casts (03:16), the infamous "weird year," and the challenges of casting young actors for adult roles.
  • “We had a very young cast… we just couldn’t have them play senators and we couldn’t do a Senate hearing.” – Kevin Nealon (03:24)
• Collaborations and the SNL Writing Room:
  • Legendary Tuesday Night writing sessions—sometimes grueling, sometimes magic.
  • “Our job is to make the show funny…and on a bad night…horrible. But on a good night…nothing is more enjoyable.” – Kevin Nealon (17:14)
  • Al praises writer Jack Handy’s discipline and unique comic mind (“caveman lawyer,” “Deep Thoughts”) (18:02).

2. Iconic Sketches & Comedic Process

• Hans and Franz:
  • Originated with Dana Carvey and Kevin Nealon on the road, inspired by Arnold Schwarzenegger’s accent and persona. (33:11)
  • “We laughed so hard writing those characters. I’ve never laughed so hard with somebody because they’re so pathetic and defensive…” – Kevin Nealon (34:23)
  • Schwarzenegger later joined the sketch, delighting them both.
• Chippendales:
  • Written by Jim Downey (15:08), with the fabled Chris Farley/Patrick Swayze dance-off.
  • “I had one line in it—Mike Myers’ line: ‘This is the part of the job I hate.’” – Kevin Nealon (14:51)
• Mr. Subliminal:
  • Kevin’s first sketch on SNL, co-written with Al (30:55).
  • “Right before it went on, Lorne puts his hand on my shoulder and said, ‘Are you sure this is what you want?’” – Kevin Nealon (31:12)
• Bathroom Attendant (w/ Harvey Keitel):
  • Over-the-top solicitousness as social satire. (38:31)
• Politically Incorrect Private Investigator & Black Ski Trail Routine:
  • Comedic critique of stereotypes and miscommunication (41:09, 42:10).

3. Life and Challenges Beyond SNL

• Post-SNL Work & Standup:
  • Touring as a standup, “Loose in the Crotch” special (host mentions at 01:09).
  • Discusses changing material, audience reactions, and the evolution of certain bits (51:33, 51:54).
• Personal Anecdotes:
  • Al and Kevin share stories of odd scheduling mix-ups (06:07), health scares (benign meningioma tumors for both Al and his wife; 11:27), and the trials of caddying and shoveling snow as kids (25:00, 26:25).
• The Realities of Show Business:
  • Changing landscape of SNL (large modern casts, increased competition) (37:05, 61:09).
  • Navigating insecurity and political drama around Weekend Update and network politics (21:27, 23:01).
  • SNL’s quiet competitiveness and how it can generate neuroses in performers (63:30).

4. Behind the Scenes, Character, and Attitude

• The Importance of Attitude in Comedy:
  • Al credits Kevin as “the funniest attitude player in the show’s history.” (01:09)
  • Kevin discusses the importance of subtle attitude and improvisational skill (13:02–13:59).
  • “I’d say, the best attitude player ever in the history of the show.” – Al Franken (12:43)
• The Everyday Side of Fame:
  • Stories about golf with Rush Limbaugh and Don Ohlmeyer (23:27), caddying, and neighborhood life (48:39).
  • Moving out of Pacific Palisades before wildfires destroyed the area (48:41).

5. Touching Tributes & Notable SNL Figures

• Chris Farley:
  • Remembered as an extraordinary, surprisingly nimble athlete with a tragic end (58:28–59:17).
  • “He was amazing, but a train wreck, as we know.” – Al Franken (59:08)
• Jan Hooks & Other SNL Legends:
  • Both hosts praise her brilliance and discuss her struggles with stage fright (60:21–60:39).
  • “That show is not for everybody…there’s a lot of great improv players that just could not handle that schedule.” – Al Franken (60:38)

6. Kevin Nealon’s Modern Projects

• Hiking With Kevin:
  • Nealon’s YouTube show where he hikes with major celebrities, self-produces and edits episodes, and even uses drones for aerial shots (55:51, 56:49).
  • “Whenever I show up for a hike, people say, ‘Where’s the rest of the crew?’ I say, ‘I’m the crew!’” – Kevin Nealon (57:21)

---

Memorable Quotes & Moments (With Timestamps)

• On SNL’s Wild Years:
  “We had Anthony Michael Hall…couldn’t have them play senators…we couldn’t do a Senate hearing.” – Kevin Nealon (03:46)

• On Writing Attitude:
  “You were, I’d say, the best attitude player ever in the history of the show.” – Al Franken (12:43)

• On Creative Partnership:
  “We laughed so hard writing those characters. I’ve never laughed so hard with somebody because they’re so pathetic and defensive…” – Kevin Nealon (34:23)

• On Fame’s Absurdities:
  “I don’t think there was one sentence directed at me…The only interaction I had was on the ninth hole when I hit the ball…Rush Limbaugh gives me the finger.” – Al Franken (23:59)

• On Farley’s Physicality:
  “I’m always amazed at someone carrying that much weight when they’re agile like that. It really doesn’t make sense to me.” – Al Franken (59:01)

• On Jan Hooks’ Brilliance:
  “Jan was right up there…she had stage fright...But she would get out there and kill it.” – Al Franken (60:21, 60:38)

• On SNL’s Competitive Spirit:
  “You gotta be more of a squeaky wheel...I didn’t know how to be a squeaky wheel.” – Kevin Nealon (62:54)

• On Career & Letting Go:
  “My time was up. I was ready to go because I think I was bored…I thought it might be time to leave.” – Kevin Nealon (64:11, 64:43)

• On the Hiking Show’s Impact:
  “Somebody will come up to me and go, dude, I love that hiking show. Who’s on next?…Don’t ever stop doing that thing.” – Kevin Nealon (57:20)

---

Notable Topics by Timestamp

• Classic SNL Cast Transitions: 03:14–04:46
• Jan Hooks’ Talent and Legacy: 04:46–05:54; revisit at 60:21–60:39
• Behind the scenes at SNL—Writing Room Stories: 17:09–18:06
• Jack Handy’s Contributions: 18:00–18:57
• Mr. Subliminal’s Origin: 30:55–32:18
• Hans and Franz Backstory: 33:11–36:12
• Chippendales Recollections: 14:05–15:33
• Norm Macdonald and Update Politics: 21:08–22:15
• Caddying and Shoveling Snow Anecdotes: 25:00–27:37
• Harvey Keitel Bathroom Attendant Sketch: 38:31–40:47
• Kevin’s Hiking Show/Evolution of Production: 55:51–57:21
• Chris Farley Stories: 58:28–59:17

---

Closing Thoughts

This episode is a treasure trove for SNL fans and students of comedy alike. Franken and Nealon’s mutual affection, quick banter, and behind-the-scenes candor are on full display. Whether they’re dissecting classic sketches, discussing what it means to find one’s comic voice, or reminiscing about lost friends and iconic characters, the conversation is always smart, affectionate, and very, very funny.

---

For more from Kevin Nealon:

• Standup special “Loose in the Crotch” (YouTube)
• “Hiking With Kevin” on YouTube
  Follow Al Franken podcast for future insightful—and hilarious—conversations.

Transcript

[Al Franken]

Hey, everybody.

[Lady Luck (Spinquest Advertiser)]

Lady luck here. And we're celebrating America's 250th birthday. Now, all summer long, I'm going to be celebrating by playing on spinquest.com which is an American owned social casino. It obviously features over a thousand slot games and live blackjack, live craps, live bubble craps. Head on over to spinquest.com get yourself a $30 coin pack for just 10 bucks.

[Al Franken]

Spin Quest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited.

[Kevin Nealon]

Visit spinquest.com for more details with VRBoCare.

[Lady Luck (Spinquest Advertiser)]

Help is always ready before, during and after your stay.

[Al Franken]

We've planned for the plot twists, so support is always available because a great trip starts with peace of mind.

[Kevin Nealon]

Hey everybody, we got a great one today, you know, for a change. And that's because this one is a best of Kevin Nealon. My old SNL buddy is my guest. Yeah, I'm taking a little break from the podcast. I've been doing the show for seven years and frankly, you know, I deserve a break. So I'd like to revisit my conversation with with Kevin from July of last year. You all know Kevin for his great years at snl. We did nine seasons together, me and Kevin, and in my mind, Kevin was the funniest attitude player in the show's history. Now, you probably remember Kevin and Dana Carvey doing Hans and Franz, two of the show's broadest, stupidest characters. And that is saying something. After snl, Kevin starred in the TV show Weeds and has been touring his. His stand up act. His stand up special, Loose in the Crotch, is newly available to watch on YouTube. So if you enjoy this episode, go check that out. Now, this episode is a departure from our typical show on current events and public policy, but Peter and I always think it's a worthwhile break to get a comedian on the show. So I was really glad to sit down with Kevin in the studio for this one. I know that you'll enjoy it. It is a great one, you know, for a change. Okay. I'm so thrilled to have my friend Kevin Nealon with us.

[Al Franken]

That's as thrilled as you get. It doesn't look thrilled at all.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, you're right.

[Al Franken]

It's almost like you're waiting for a

[Kevin Nealon]

bus, you know, I'm so thrilled that this bus.

[Al Franken]

You gotta have a smile at least. Have you ever been thrilled before? Be. Be honest with me.

[Kevin Nealon]

Have I ever been thrilled? Yes.

[Al Franken]

When was the last time you were thrilled?

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, that's none of your business.

[Al Franken]

I was gonna say that when I came in.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay. I'm thrilled to have you.

[Al Franken]

I believe that now.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

And Kevin, one of the funniest cast members we ever had on SNL during the whole 50 years. Can you believe that?

[Al Franken]

Oh, man. But, you know, for me, it was over 30 years ago. I was in that show. Isn't that crazy?

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. And I left. Same for me, because that's when I left it.

[Al Franken]

And you were there for a long time.

[Kevin Nealon]

I did 15 seasons.

[Al Franken]

You did 15. And didn't you run the show at one point?

[Kevin Nealon]

I did.

[Al Franken]

Was it the weird year?

[Kevin Nealon]

That was the weird year. We had a year where. I don't want to blame Lorne for his casting choices, but we had a very young cast.

[Al Franken]

Lauren had something to do with that. I thought that was before he came back.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, no, that was the year he came back.

[Al Franken]

That's right. Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. And we had Anthony Michael hall, who

[Al Franken]

was all good actors. Robert Downey Jr. Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Won an Oscar. No, he's great. But he was 19 at the time or something like that. And I think hall was like, 17, maybe. And, you know, we just couldn't have them play senators and we couldn't do a Senate hearing.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. And you couldn't have stunt cast back then.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. And so the next year. And the network was threatening of canceling the show. Can you imagine that? Because 35 years later, what a dumb move it would have been to cancel the show. But anyway, so Lauren. Then we picked a cast. Dennis Miller was Dennis in the first.

[Al Franken]

He was there in that weird year.

[Kevin Nealon]

Dennis Miller. He was there. The weird year.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, that's right.

[Kevin Nealon]

Nora Dunn, who worked with you. Yeah, With Victoria and Jan. Jan Hooks. Yeah, Jan Hooks. Did you. You work with Jan before snl? I read something somewhere that you had worked with her, like a year before that you came to SNL or did you know her before?

[Al Franken]

Jan and I were great friends for six years. I met her at an audition for some sketch show at 20th Century Fox. And we had some time in the waiting room to kind of converse. And I really liked her. I really fell in love with her talent. She was so talented.

[Kevin Nealon]

Unbelievable.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

I mean, she was. You know what? I watched the Bush Dukakis debate recently with course Danez Bush and Lovitz's Dukakis. And she was Diane Sawyer.

[Al Franken]

That's right.

[Kevin Nealon]

And she just made me laugh so hard in that because she was very. She tried to be a little sexy.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, yeah. Buffing the hair of the sides and

[Kevin Nealon]

a wink here or there while completely boring into both of them. So, I mean, she could do shit like that.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, Yeah. I did see Diane sawyer at the 50th anniversary couple.

[Kevin Nealon]

She was there.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. She was.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, yes.

[Al Franken]

Acting kind of sexy. Winking.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, she had been a friend, a good friend of Mike Nichols.

[Al Franken]

That's right.

[Kevin Nealon]

And Lauren and Mike Nichols were tight.

[Al Franken]

That's right.

[Kevin Nealon]

So how did. How did it happen that we had all this? So I get a call, like, from you on Sunday saying I can't do it on Tuesday. Today is.

[Al Franken]

You're talking about the podcast.

[Kevin Nealon]

I'm talking about the podcast now. I'm talking about you putting me through. I had to call my team. We had to reschedule. People had. It was Peter on the east coast in Baltimore, who's my producer. I had sheer. Here. It was.

[Al Franken]

You're a NASA space center in Houston.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, I don't.

[Al Franken]

Okay. I was just feeling it out. But let me tell you what happened. First of all, I've never been in that position before where I've kind of created havoc, like that kind of diva havoc before something. But on this particular occasion, I did panic because I looked at my schedule and it showed our podcast day as yesterday. And I thought, that is crazy because I have this scheduled an hour and a half away and I'll never be able to get back from Melrose in time. And my wife was not happy about it. And so I said, well, I'm going to call and see if we can move this. So I was panicking. I was calling from Richard Lewis Memorial.

[Kevin Nealon]

It was a memorial for Richard.

[Al Franken]

It was. Yeah, a year later.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, wow.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, it was amazing.

[Kevin Nealon]

I'm sorry that you had to go through this during that.

[Al Franken]

I apologize to Richard Lewis. So anyway, because I didn't want to leave you high and dry because I've been in that position before where people are just really impossible. So I'm thinking, oh, now here I'm that person. I'm being impossible. I'm last minute. Because we doubled books, not double booked, but we double confirmed that this was the date because we had to push it back a little bit. Anyway, long story short, I found out that my iPhone calendar was splitting a day so I could see half of what's on the next day. And your name was half on the next day. You know what I mean?

[Kevin Nealon]

I kind of got it.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Just like there was two.

[Kevin Nealon]

It's a great cover story.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Well, there's a lot more good stuff here. So anyway, I panicked, and then I finally realized, wait a minute, I'm looking at this calendar wrong. So I had to call you Back. And Peter. And here's the funny thing is I left a message, a long message from Peter and never heard back from him. And then I get a text from Albert Brooks saying, hey, did you mean to call me on this one? I don't know who you know, really. I want to make sure that this guy gets the message, you know, somehow. I said, called Albert Brooks. Called Albert Brooks by mistake.

[Kevin Nealon]

You're having a rough period. Does this have anything. Can I ask you about how. How your MRI went yesterday?

[Al Franken]

I had to cancel because of my cold. There's one thing I didn't cancel because of my cold. You know what it is?

[Kevin Nealon]

This.

[Al Franken]

This. Oh, and I gave you a forewarning, too. I said, hey, we can always reschedule this if you want, because I have really bad cold. And as you slide back a little bit further.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, I sit back, just.

[Al Franken]

I mean, it's not in the chest. It's just congestion, you know?

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

Here's. First of all, here's what I had to cancel the last two days. An MRI on Monday and this morning, root canal. Oh, I've had this cold for two days. I got back from the road. You know, you always get it on an airplane. Yeah, it might be Covid. I don't even know.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, you know, there are tests.

[Al Franken]

Well, they're saying now that, you know, if they don't even ask you if you have Covid, if you're doing a job, like on a movie or something, they don't even ask you because it's like a cold now. That's all. There's no side effects or threat to dying.

[Kevin Nealon]

But you can give it to somebody else.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, but the same thing.

[Kevin Nealon]

They're not going to die is what you're saying.

[Al Franken]

No, they're not going to die. Get rid of it.

[Kevin Nealon]

What if you're doing a movie with a lot of 90 year olds?

[Al Franken]

Doesn't matter.

[Kevin Nealon]

And you have Covid?

[Al Franken]

Doesn't matter. I think it does well, because you're 90.

[Kevin Nealon]

I am not 90. I am older than you.

[Al Franken]

Wouldn't it be great if you could give away your cold and then you wouldn't have it anymore?

[Kevin Nealon]

You mean. I see. Giving someone a cold would be mean. You. Yeah.

[Al Franken]

You no longer are congested or have the cold.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, they're working on that.

[Al Franken]

That would be great, man. I know a lot of people I

[Kevin Nealon]

want to give a cold to Johns Hopkins.

[Al Franken]

Is it John Hopkins or is it John Hopkins?

[Kevin Nealon]

It's John Hopkins.

[Al Franken]

For some reason, I always get that wrong. Johns Hopkins. It's almost like he owns the Hopkins, right? It's Johns Hopkins.

[Kevin Nealon]

That's. I guess that's what it's from. So, can I ask you about what you're looking for?

[Al Franken]

You can ask me anything you want. Except things that I don't want to answer.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay.

[Al Franken]

Well, yeah, you could ask me the MRI. I get MRIs once a year, starting a couple years ago because they discovered I had a meningioma tumor. Not in the brain, in your head. Between the skull and the brain?

[Kevin Nealon]

Between the skull and the brain.

[Al Franken]

It's benign.

[Kevin Nealon]

It's benign. So it's not life threatening? What did you call it again?

[Al Franken]

Menageioma.

[Kevin Nealon]

And that is always benign?

[Al Franken]

No. No, I don't think so.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay.

[Al Franken]

No.

[Kevin Nealon]

And how big is this thing?

[Al Franken]

You've seen my car, right? What I pulled in? It's a lot bigger than my head, I'll tell you that. No, it's maybe an inch. An inch by a half an inch.

[Kevin Nealon]

And there's no danger to you if it doesn't grow. But if it grows, then.

[Al Franken]

Well, that's why I get an mri. But it hasn't been growing in the last couple of. So I wasn't even going to go get one. But then the doctor says, hey, you should go get one, just to be on the safe side.

[Kevin Nealon]

You should do it every year.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, but the crazy thing is. Listen. Listen to this, Al. My wife has one the same size in the exact same location.

[Kevin Nealon]

Are you kidding me?

[Al Franken]

No.

[Kevin Nealon]

Susan has the exact same tumor.

[Al Franken]

Meningioma tumor, same size, benign. And I don't know, maybe we're soulmates. Maybe that's the way you could find out. Your soulmate. I don't know what it's from. Is it a cell phone or what? Okay, what do you have? How many tumors do you have?

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, I have one sticking out here. No, I've been fortunate, knock on wood. It's nothing to joke about.

[Al Franken]

No, it's not.

[Kevin Nealon]

But a benign men. Is that what you call it?

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

If you're going to have one, that's the kind to have, right?

[Al Franken]

Yeah. So if you're listening, try to get it. Just try to get it, because it is the best one. It's not really a joke. It's more of a point of view.

[Kevin Nealon]

It's like you. You do attitude.

[Al Franken]

I asked you once, I said, al, do you think I was the straight man on snl? And you said, what?

[Kevin Nealon]

No, it's all the attitude. You were, I'd say, the best attitude player ever in the history of the show.

[Al Franken]

Well, thank you.

[Kevin Nealon]

I Mean, kind of by far.

[Al Franken]

I was never one for broad comedy because I never did sketch work before snl. It was always stand up. And I'm also a good imposter, but a good rate with a bs. So I could like, take. Yeah, I'm like a. I'm like a chameleon in that way with the attitude.

[Kevin Nealon]

You are a chameleon.

[Al Franken]

So I think that's where the attitude comes in from.

[Kevin Nealon]

But that's where that comes in. Helpful in being on a cat in a cast.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

So you didn't do any Groundlings or anything like that? You did stand up.

[Al Franken]

Stand up. You know, people always say, hey, you've never improvised before. But the thing is, we all improvise in our life.

[Kevin Nealon]

You're one of the greatest improvisers I know.

[Al Franken]

Well, it is documented. Yeah, that is true.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, no, but I mean, your mind is. I think of you as a great improviser.

[Al Franken]

Thank you. But maybe in a certain.

[Kevin Nealon]

Now that would be a good time

[Al Franken]

for a great improvise. Yes. And in a certain respect, I probably am. But I cannot like these great improv players at the Groundlings or Sex City. You give them a film type film noir and this and that, and then

[Kevin Nealon]

they go, right, okay, well, that's a training and a skill that you don't have. But I'm talking about.

[Al Franken]

I'm able to roll with stuff.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, but your attitude. I called you also an attitude player.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Like in Chippendales.

[Al Franken]

Right.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay.

[Al Franken]

Keep in the straight phase.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, you just lay out the premise, which is. This has been a really hard.

[Al Franken]

Believe me, we have been struggling up here to come to a decision. And I'm sorry, we're going to have to go with Patrick Swayze or whatever his name was.

[Kevin Nealon]

It was. God, he had a name. The character had a name.

[Al Franken]

Do you know who would know that name right away? Jim Downey. Jim Downey wrote the piece, but he knows everything about.

[Kevin Nealon]

Jim Downey was one of the great writers on the show.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Not the greatest thing. And he wrote Chippendales. I had one line in it. Mike Myers line, this is the part of the job I hate.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, that's funny.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

When it comes to judging.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, that was it. And so my name was on it. And at Read through, they put the names of the writers on it. So it was Downey Franken. But I had written one line. I just kind of sat with him. Well, he just conjured this whole thing.

[Al Franken]

Well, that was smart on his behalf because if you put a good writer's name on a script, it's more likely to get on because Lorne will see it and go, oh, Al's one of the writers here. Let's take a close look at this.

[Kevin Nealon]

I think he did it out of an ethos of I wrote a line and so Al gets his name on. And I was a little embarrassed because I literally wrote. But that's a good line, right?

[Al Franken]

That's a great line.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. This is the part of the job I hate. And yeah, basically you were saying that you've had so many tryouts and it's just impossible to choose between these two. And you're going to do one last. And as everybody's working for the weekend as a song. And Swayze was a dancer and had a perfectly chiseled male body, even though

[Al Franken]

he told me he never works out.

[Kevin Nealon]

Is that right?

[Al Franken]

Yeah. It must be from dancing.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. Well.

[Al Franken]

But I like the way Farley wanted to keep going and we were. No, no, no, no.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, that's when he. He adopts like a. You've told him that you've. Swayze is the guy. And at one point he starts trying to look sultry.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

And you have to go, no, no,

[Al Franken]

I'm sorry, it's been decided.

[Kevin Nealon]

Barney. Barney. I'm sorry. Barney. That's the other thing I named Barney. I think Swayze was Adrian.

[Al Franken]

Isn't it funny? Like, 35 years later, you still remember because you put so much work. We put so much work in writing these sketches and you're up all night sometimes. And so 35 years later, that, to

[Kevin Nealon]

me, by the way, was the funnest anyone ever asked me, what's the funnest thing you've ever. Moment. If you want to crystallize a moment on snl. Working on snl, it was Tuesday night, Wednesday morning, three in the morning, and you're falling on the floor laughing. You know, whether it was you guys coming in with your Hans and Franz, you know what you've been writing.

[Al Franken]

Right.

[Kevin Nealon]

And. But you know how when you. I mean, our job is to make the show funny.

[Al Franken]

Right.

[Kevin Nealon]

And on a bad night and you're not writing anything funny, it's horrible. But on a good night, when you're clicking and things are flying back and forth and everyone else is making you laugh, nothing is more enjoyable than that.

[Al Franken]

That's right. That's right. Well, I will tell you, I'm not a night person. So Tuesdays. Very rarely did I work through the night. I would start writing earlier on Tuesday so that by 1 o', clock, 2 o' clock in the morning, Tuesday morning or Wednesday morning. I would be done.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, that's good. That reflects a good work habit.

[Al Franken]

I mean, it's hard.

[Kevin Nealon]

As opposed to the rest of us.

[Al Franken]

Do you know who had the best work habits? Who?

[Kevin Nealon]

The Turners?

[Al Franken]

No. Jack Handy.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, my gosh.

[Al Franken]

He would come in with his briefcase. What, 7:00'?

[Kevin Nealon]

Clock? Well, we should say what Jack Handy wrote. The caveman lawyer. This is the cat.

[Al Franken]

So many of those off the wall kind of. I remember literally off the wall. Johnny Canal. Remember Johnny Canal?

[Kevin Nealon]

He's the guy who wants to connect every city in America. This is in the 1830s or something with a canal.

[Al Franken]

How about the Jack Handy sketch where it starts with a mounted head on the wall and it keeps going down to a mouse's head that's mounted a little bit more, a little bit more until it's like a, I don't know, grasshopper head mounted on the wall and somebody's just talking about each one. But he was great. And also he had those Handy, the sayings, you know, deep thoughts. Deep thoughts. Yeah. Yeah, that was great. So he was the one who had really the best discipline.

[Kevin Nealon]

One was about a jumbo shrimp that you could ride it during the day and then eat it at the campfire at night.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. By the way, my voice is not always this deep or sexy.

[Kevin Nealon]

It's part of the very sexy.

[Al Franken]

Well, this is the other half of that thing. I texted you this morning and said, al, I got a cold.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, thanks for coming in.

[Al Franken]

And I know you thought that maybe I was trying to squirm out of it still.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, no, no. Because you could have done it at home. You would have done it at home.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

But I wanted to see you.

[Al Franken]

Thank you. Yeah. I've been seeing a lot of you lately.

[Kevin Nealon]

You have?

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Maybe a little too much. You think?

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, I don't know. I doubt it. I'm not that. Where did you see me? I think you some cable news show or something.

[Al Franken]

Probably C Span. You introduced everybody to C Span. Nobody knew what C Span was.

[Kevin Nealon]

That was one of the gifts I gave the show.

[Al Franken]

You and Bonnie and Terry Turner, you know, I think they were into C Span as well. And Downey and Downey. But you and I wrote a lot on different things. I would tell you, I think. Cause you got my attitude or whatever. But I remember when we were trying to get people to write for a weekend update when I was on there, nobody wanted to write because, you know, it's not as glorifying as having a sketch or a character You've created for Monday that people talk about.

[Kevin Nealon]

And there was an update breakfast and barely anyone.

[Al Franken]

So Lauren put together a weekend an update breakfast that Saturday morning because you can't write jokes before that because the late night talk show hosts do them all. So this is before Internet back in the 1900s. And Lauren would have someone put all the newspapers on that big table and AP photos. There was no Google, you know. And then he would hire. He had this caterer come in that had a warm breakfast and everything also. Great, great breakfast. Yeah. And the only people that would come would be you because you were kind of a political pundit. You love politics. And then Tom Davis would come to sip. My partner. Yeah, your partner. And then a lot of new writers would come. Not a lot, but some. And they weren't that good because they were new and they're still kind of feeling their way. And then Norm would come up and he would get breakfast and just read a paper. That's all he did. He didn't write anything. He just wanted to come up and have breakfast and read a paper.

[Kevin Nealon]

That's crazy because Norm did update after you left.

[Al Franken]

Norm didn't even know who anybody was. Like, he's from Canada. He didn't know a lot of the people in the news because I remember one day he asked me who somebody was, and I forget who it was, but it was somebody that was high up in the government.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, he ended up doing an update. I competed. When you decided that you were going to leave.

[Al Franken]

Really?

[Kevin Nealon]

I competed with Norm for the update position, and he got it. And I think it was because I was so known as a liberal common. You know, I had shown where I was and Norm hadn't. And I thought Norm did a terrific job.

[Al Franken]

Great job. Yeah. He had a certain talking about attitude. He had a certain kind of a disposition or personality that was kind of just. You knew that he was having fun and he's walking down that line and

[Kevin Nealon]

didn't really see him always on the line. And of course, Don Ulmeyer was the president of the network at the time, and he was a very good friend of O.J. simpson's. You knew that.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. And like a good friend, he didn't let the fact that his friend murdered his wife and a guy end that friendship.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

But I guess the appeals. I don't think this was. Was this during the trial?

[Al Franken]

I think it was during the trial and maybe afterwards, too.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. And afterwards he just. Norm would do an OJ Joke. What were some of those jokes like? It was.

[Al Franken]

Was A lot of the high speed chase or the slow speed chase thing, and about looking for the killer, you know, maybe he's on the golf course somewhere, you know, that kind of stuff. But, you know, I. I did not decide to leave Weekend Update. I was. I was pushed out as well.

[Kevin Nealon]

Was that Allmeyer?

[Al Franken]

I think it was. From what I've heard, it was all Meyer.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, he pushed Norm out. He ended up pushing Norm out, who was amazing.

[Al Franken]

And you know what's crazy? I've always wanted to golf at Bel Air Country Club. I was at a party, a wrap party for this show that was run by the same guy that created 24 with Kiefer Sutherland.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, I know.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. It's kind of a conservative guy. And he was good friends with old Meyer and with Rush Limbaugh. So he comes up to me and he goes, hey, do you want to golf at Bel Air? I said, yeah, I've always been. Yeah. Are you kidding me? Sure. And he goes. And he comes back to me and he goes, okay, you got nine o' clock tee time on Saturday. You'll be golfing with Don Ohlmeyer and Rush Limbaugh. So I thought he was joking at first. And so I had to weigh the pros and cons. I really wanted to golf there. So I end up going there, and I'm golfing with Rush Limbaugh and Donald.

[Kevin Nealon]

I would have done that, although I don't think I would have been invited.

[Al Franken]

But I don't think there was one sentence directed at me. The only interaction I had was on the ninth hole when I hit the ball. It landed right by the hole for a birdie, and Rush Limbaugh gives me the finger.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, that was funny, right? It was, yeah.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. But that's the only interaction I've had with him.

[Kevin Nealon]

So are you a good golfer?

[Al Franken]

No, but I got lucky on that shot.

[Kevin Nealon]

But you like. You like playing.

[Al Franken]

I used to like playing golf, but now it's, you know, it's. Here's the thing for me, Al, when I'm working on something or, you know, I'm busy doing things or I'm tired of doing things, I think, man, I sure would like to be golfing right now. And then I go golfing sometime, and I think, boy, I sure would like to be home editing this thing now. You know what I mean? I think it should be only nine holes, because I get bored after nine holes. I really do. I get bored from hitting the ball.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, can't you do nine and just come in?

[Al Franken]

Well, I'm at That point, because the

[Kevin Nealon]

ninth hole is usually by the clubhouse, right?

[Al Franken]

Yeah, yeah, you're right. Yeah. But that's what I'm doing from that one.

[Kevin Nealon]

I used to caddy when I was a kid.

[Al Franken]

What did you make per bag?

[Kevin Nealon]

You know, I can't really remember, but it was at the time it was actual real money, but it wasn't that much.

[Al Franken]

It wasn't bitcoin?

[Kevin Nealon]

No.

[Al Franken]

Now they tell you, okay, I'm giving you 20 bitcoin, and you never see it. Oh, that guy was nice. 20, that's a lot.

[Kevin Nealon]

Wait a minute. Bitcoin is actually being used by people as remuneration.

[Al Franken]

Well, it's a great way to tip somebody when you never really have to tip them just because you can't see a bitcoin and you say, I'm giving you 20 bitcoins. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Kevin Nealon]

I see. I see.

[Al Franken]

Any way to get around bitcoin being cheap. I try to investigate. So, yeah, so $5 I got per bag. And I would do double bags sometimes.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, I double bag all the time. Yeah. And they'd go on the cart and you'd catch up to them. And you were responsible for finding the balls they hit way into the rough. And did you ever have troubles finding them?

[Al Franken]

Oh, yeah, yeah, all the time. Sometimes I would be looking for them. I can't find them, so I just leave the bag there and I continue home.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, I got a string of not being able to find them. And I had a guy say, you must be the worst caddy in the world. And I said, no, that'd be too big a coincidence because I was 12.

[Al Franken]

But that's how you made money in the summer and then in the winter, of course, you grew up in Wisconsin.

[Kevin Nealon]

Minnesota.

[Al Franken]

Minnesota.

[Kevin Nealon]

You shovel snow?

[Al Franken]

You shovel snow, Man, I would make so much money, or I thought it was a lot of money back then. But in California, in the winter, my son had to do this thing for school. It's like being an entrepreneur. So their first thing they were going to try, him and his buddy was window washing. They know nothing about window washing. They have a bucket of water they bring with them. Like it's going to clean the whole house. Squeegee. That was a very narrow squeegee.

[Kevin Nealon]

Not big enough to really do windows.

[Al Franken]

Big enough. And it wasn't like broken in, so it was hard. You had to push it down really hard. And then they had, like one cloth and they got $30 to wash these windows. In a business in Westwood, a pet store, like five big windows, $30.

[Kevin Nealon]

How long did it take?

[Al Franken]

They thought it would take maybe an hour. It took four hours for 30 bucks. And yeah, so that was their.

[Kevin Nealon]

See, 30 bucks for four hours would have been fine. When I was in shoveling driveways, 1963 or something like that when I was 12.

[Al Franken]

And I. Yeah, oh yeah, because 30 bucks back then was like $2,000, something like that.

[Kevin Nealon]

I told him I filled a tank of gas yesterday. It was 70 bucks.

[Al Franken]

Oh, you know what, When I drove out to LA from Connecticut with a buddy of mine, it was 1976. We kept track of our gas because we were going to split it at the end. So I'm looking at like, you know, in Boise, Idaho, we filled up the tank for $7.60. You know, I think the entire trip was like $200.

[Kevin Nealon]

What year is this?

[Al Franken]

76, 77. But I was getting back to when you live in California, there's no shoveling driveway. So I thought of a great idea. Once in a while, guys will come by your house and they want to paint your address on the curb in front of your house. And they say it's, you know, there's no charge for it. You know, you could tip, you know, if you want. You know, usually get like 20 bucks or whatever. So we had it done. And those guys make a lot of money. And it takes like maybe 20 minutes.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, it's a stencil.

[Al Franken]

Can of white spray paint and a stencil.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah,

[Al Franken]

that's it. A lot easier than shoveling drivers for $20.

[Kevin Nealon]

Hanging out at the pool is great.

[Al Franken]

Relaxing and playing Vegas style games on

[Kevin Nealon]

my phone at the same time. Drink in one hand and a blackjack in the other. It's all at spinquest.

[Al Franken]

Over a thousand games, including your favorite slots and table games. Be cool with this summer special. New players get $30 coin packs for

[Kevin Nealon]

[e-mail] SpinQuest is a free to play social casino. Visit SpinQuest.com for more details.

[Lady Luck (Spinquest Advertiser)]

If the world were like a Sleep Number mattress, everything would adapt for your comfort. Because as your life changes and your body changes, Sleep number mattresses adapt and shift to give you personalized comfort night after night. And now it's the final days of our everything's on sale event. Save up to $1,200 on mattresses. Our Memorial Day event ends Monday. To experience a whole new world of comfort, visit a sleep number store or go to sleepnumber.com sleep number to a good life. Sleep

[Al Franken]

Dish has been connecting communities like

[Kevin Nealon]

yours for the last 45 years, providing the team you love at a price you can trust.

[Al Franken]

Watch live sports news and the latest

[Kevin Nealon]

movies, plus your favorite streaming apps, all in one place. Switch to Dish today and lock in the lowest price in satellite TV, starting at $89.99 a month with our two year price guarantee. Call 888-add-d Dish or visit dish.com today.

[Lady Luck (Spinquest Advertiser)]

It's cozy season, and nothing compares to wrapping yourself in a Minky Couture blanket. Luxuriously soft, perfectly warm, thoughtfully made from movie nights to chilly mornings, Minky Couture turns everyday moments into pure comfort. Once you feel it, you'll understand why it's called the original. Best blanket ever. Visit minkycouture.com or a store near you and make this cozy season your softest one yet.

[Kevin Nealon]

I want to talk about some of the stuff you did on SNL, Mr. Subliminal.

[Al Franken]

That was the first sketch I ever did. I remember right before it went on. And we wrote that together right before I went on. It was like 10 seconds away from the commercial coming back. Lorne puts his hand on my shoulders and he said, are you sure this is what you want? But that was something.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, my God, what a confidence builder.

[Al Franken]

That was something I did in my actual. And I called it tagging, where you just slip a word in there like nobody heard it. And then you and I got together and you had the idea of making a subliminal advertising thing where I get my way. And we both pounded that out. We pounded that. And it went well. It went well. I mean, the next day people are recognizing me on the street and nobody could say subliminal. They don't know how to say it. It's always, hey, I love that. But it's Subliminal thing that you do. The Slow Moon then Noel, I remember

[Kevin Nealon]

one of the things you was push up bra.

[Al Franken]

That was one of the insertions there, the words push up bra. You're looking really great today. Push up bra. I like what you're doing, but that's like two conversations going on at once. So to have that as a first sketch was kind of intimidating. And you can't really read that off the cue cards. And I memorized that. I had that down in my head. I worked on that as our first catch.

[Kevin Nealon]

Right? You were good with cards, right?

[Al Franken]

I was good. I was good with cards. I think a lot of our cast was good with cards. Unlike some of the other casts where they never leave the cards. They're always on the cards. Like Charlton Heston was always on the cards.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, he's Charlton Heston.

[Al Franken]

Can you believe we work with Robert Mitchum, Charlton Heston, Roy Orbison, William Shatner? I mean, all of this.

[Kevin Nealon]

Shatner is still with us.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, yeah. And, you know, I thought he was old back then, but I think he was like 56.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, no, no, he was pretty old. He's older than you think.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, well, no, he looks good. 120, isn't he?

[Kevin Nealon]

No, he's in. I'm sure he's in his late 80s now.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, but that was 30 years ago. Was it that we were on or 34 years ago.

[Kevin Nealon]

Shatner did. Okay, maybe you're right.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay. So tell me about Hans and Franz.

[Al Franken]

So Dana and I came up with Hans and Franz.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yes.

[Al Franken]

We had been on tour with Dennis Miller. Right after the first year, we were on snl. So this was an SNL themed tour. We were doing standup and in Des Moines, Iowa. Dana and I were staying. We were all staying this Red Roof Inn. And I was watching Showtime up close and personal with Arnold Schwarzenegger. And we all love his accent. And he was talking about how they asked him, what does he do when he is on the road and comes into a town. Well, you know, first of all, I like to slip into the nice light cotton shirt. And then, you know, I go into town and, you know, have some fun. I come back to the hotel room and I slip into the nice light cotton sheets, you know, and I told Dana he should watch it. So the rest of the tour, we're talking like Arnold Schwarzenegger. We laugh so hard writing those characters. I've never laughed so hard with somebody because they're so pathetic and defensive and they never lift a weight in their life. And they're so. They're sweatsuits are outdated and, you know, it's always about, you know, hear me now, believe me later, you know, if you think you can do better than the nuns, then, you know, you've got a different thing coming to you. You know, I could stretch your love handles into a bag and you could climb into the bag and kill yourself out of the trash, because that's where trash belongs. Nice one, Hans. Yeah, thank you. Thank you, Hans. You know, you could. If you take your belt off, you cause a flabber lunch. So we would write that stuff. And it was just so. We laughed so hard because they were such pathetic characters.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, again, that memory of mine on Monday nights, you guys coming up Tuesday nights and you guys telling us what you were coming up with.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

And falling on the floor laughing.

[Al Franken]

Oh, yeah. It really Was funny. And then eventually Arnold. And eventually we got help from other people, too, Like Smigel a lot. And Downey. Robert Smigel was great. And then Arnold wants to come on the show, and Dana and I are, like, flummoxed. Well, why would he want to come on the show? We're making fun of him. We thought maybe he's coming on to kill us or something, you know, or to break our legs.

[Kevin Nealon]

Everybody's flattered.

[Al Franken]

I know it. I learned that later.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

You know, it's just to have their name mentioned on there. It doesn't matter what we're doing about them.

[Kevin Nealon]

You guys were trying to emulate.

[Al Franken]

He was our distant cousin. Yeah. Yeah. So he comes. You know, they get us on the set. They said, arnold's in his dressing room. He wants to talk to you guys. We were like two kids going to the principal's office. We were blaming each other. You came up with an eye. You did. I said, don't do the Austrian accent. He's going to know. Or the Gap. So we get to his dressing room, and his name is on the door. His name was so long, it went onto the wall a little bit. You know, we open up the door, and I'll never forget this. It was full of cigar smoke. And he's sitting on a chair across the room. We could barely see him through the smoke. And he's got a cigar in one hand, a big old stogie. And in the other hand, he's got the script that we wrote for him. And he looks up through the cigar smoke and he goes, hello, fellas. Know, how am I supposed to do the accent? So right then we knew we had a good sense of humor. Yeah, but he loved them. He used those characters things for a long time, you know, like all the phrases we had still does to this day.

[Kevin Nealon]

That's great. Do you remember a sketch that I wrote, I think, with some other folks, when it was you were an advertising executive who bought commercials for tv and we brought a. Or whoever was in the cast was selling, trying to get you to put on the Country Music Awards, a toothpaste called Sparklebright. Do you remember that piece?

[Al Franken]

Vaguely.

[Kevin Nealon]

The whole joke in it was, by

[Al Franken]

the way, Al, let me just stop. I'll be watching reruns of that show. Sometimes they just come on TV and I'm in the sketch, and I have no idea. It's like I've never seen that sketch before. I think, what is gonna happen here?

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, that, you know, to me, that was the advantage of not having A huge cast.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Haven't you been struck with how large the casts are these days?

[Al Franken]

Incredible. I mean, it's like a 20 minute intro.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

It's like 20 people featuring and then featuring and also. And also a guy we got off the street, you know, that had a good bit.

[Kevin Nealon]

I mean, you guys, basically. Who was in your cast?

[Al Franken]

There was eight of us. Yeah. And then there were some peripheral people like you and aa.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, then we were writers.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. So that's.

[Al Franken]

In the old days, Conan would get on.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah. Now I complain like an old man, but in the old days, in the first iteration of the show, we had seven cast members. Jane, Lorraine and Gilda Garrett, Chevy, Blushy and Danny. So seven people, which meant they all got on every week.

[Al Franken]

Right.

[Kevin Nealon]

And that gives you confidence, right?

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Because you're just on and you now can't remember a sketch you're in. That's because you were probably in so many sketches.

[Al Franken]

Also, because once you finish a Saturday night of sketches, you completely wash it out of your head and you make room for the next week. You know what I mean? And plus, you're not really spending a lot of time memorizing lines because they're on cue cards. So subsequently, it's not like that's going to stick in your head unless it's a sketch you really liked and you remember. Right. For me, it's like the bathroom attendant with Harvey Keitel. Do you remember that one?

[Kevin Nealon]

I have that written down here. I wanted to talk bathroom attendant with Harvey Keitel. It was a solicitous, invasive bathroom attendant. Is that a right description?

[Al Franken]

That's it.

[Kevin Nealon]

Folding toilet paper. Like you pull off some toilet paper squares. Toilet paper squares and fold them up for them and hand them to him. You gave him a newspaper that he could read.

[Al Franken]

Well, I've always had a problem with bathroom attendants. It's like, we don't need help. We've been training all our lives.

[Kevin Nealon]

This is like the perfect, okay, I'm going to do a bathroom attendant. But carrying it to its extreme, right?

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

And Harvey Keitel was sort of the perfect guy.

[Al Franken]

He was the perfect guy. So, you know, I've seen all these bathroom attendants and what they do, it's unnecessary stuff, you know, here's your towel. Let me dry your hands for you. You know, and then there's some candy up here, and then they have a tip jar, you know. So I took it to the extreme where it's a very small bathroom and just enough room for a toilet. No stall at all. And I'm In a tuxedo and very proper. And he comes and he thinks somebody's in there using the bathroom. I said, oh, no, no, I'm sorry, sir. I work here. And it kind of startles him. Then he goes, oh, okay. And I say, would he be going number one or will he be dropping anchor? And so, you know, we go through the whole thing. He's unbuckling his belt, and I go, let me get that started. No, no, no, that's all right. That's all right. And then he sits down, and I said, we have the New York Times, we have the Post, we have the Wall Street Journal. We have high karate. We have Calvin Klein cologne. We have Brute. And then. No, no. And he takes a newspaper and he holds it over his head. Cause he's laughing, you know, and then in the meantime, I'm folding toilet paper, putting it on the sink, getting ready for him to use it. And, you know, the spray. The room spray.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, right.

[Al Franken]

And finally he goes, he's done. He's done. He gets up. I'm trying to help him pull his pants up. No, no, that's all right. That's all right. I got it. And then I'm brushing him off, you know, the cat roller and stuff, getting hair off of him. And then I kind of hold the tip basket out just nonchalantly, and he puts money in there. And I go, oh, thank you very much. As if I wasn't expecting him, as

[Kevin Nealon]

if it was a surprise.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. And then he le. Leaves, and then Farley comes in. Oh, hey, Jack. Good to see you again. He's my regular.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, that was a brilliant sketch. So many of your sketches were attitude. Your attitude. Whenever you have to decide something that's obvious.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, yeah. Well, another sketch that. I forget his name. Dan, was it? He was a guest writer. I think he wrote Pipi. Politically Incorrect, Private Investigator. Do you remember that?

[Kevin Nealon]

I remember the premise. Who was in it?

[Al Franken]

Oh, it was me and Catherine o' Hara and Tim Meadows. And basically, I come in with a trench coat, like a Colombo kind of a guy. And it's. You know, it's a classroom. And Catherine o' Hara is distraught, crying over this body of a dead man. Who was Tim Meadows, I think. And I come in and I say, what's going on here? I pull out my pad, and she goes, the professor was just killed or something. And they take the sheet off of him, and it's. I think it was Tim. We go, how could. This is not a professor. He's obviously, you know, he's a Black man.

[Kevin Nealon]

Right, right.

[Al Franken]

He's like a politically incorrect private investigator and everything. It was like there was a doctor, so. And so that's a woman. How could that be? I thought you said it was a doctor. Yeah, it's a woman doctor. So that was another one that kind of walked the line back then.

[Kevin Nealon]

Reminds me of something you recently put up on YouTube or something, which is talking about. You're in Colorado and talking about skiing.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

And going to.

[Al Franken]

I don't know, it was learning how to ski and understanding how they label the trails.

[Kevin Nealon]

And you had no clue what the trails were, and you stopped off at some place.

[Al Franken]

Well, there's green, you know, that means the easy trails. And then there's the blue intermediate, and then there's the black for very difficult trails, you know, Black diamonds. Right.

[Kevin Nealon]

But you weren't aware.

[Al Franken]

I was not aware of that. And I asked the guy at the pulled up over at the convenience store, and I asked the guy behind the counter, I said, what's the best mountain to go skiing around here? I. I don't know anything about these mountains. He goes, well, you know, I like Copper Mountain, but a lot of people don't like the ski there because they're afraid of all the blacks. And I don't know that there's black diamonds, you know, he's talking about. He goes, but I don't mind the blacks. I have a lot of fun with them. And I'm thinking, this guy's a racist, man. All, you know, I can't believe this. And he goes, but you know what? Some of them not very well groomed. And he said, but if you want the good white powder, that's where you gotta go. So that was essentially the bit.

[Kevin Nealon]

So you've been on tour a lot, I take it?

[Al Franken]

I am on tour. And people can find out what my touring schedule is by going on my website. Kevinnealon.com youm're hilarious. Quite.

[Kevin Nealon]

So you did me a favor and opened for me when I did a thing in Hollywood.

[Al Franken]

That's right. Oh, yeah, that's right.

[Kevin Nealon]

And you killed.

[Al Franken]

That was a good crowd. I think we had the same crowds.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, it was a good full house. And you just killed a couple things. Football. In college, you were the quarterback for your football team.

[Al Franken]

You were always so, I think, impressed with my history in football because we would play in Central park and you were a bruiser. You would come in really hard, a lot of elbows and stuff. You don't want to be near Al Franken when he's rushing in at you. He's very, very, very tough player. So, yeah, I was short.

[Kevin Nealon]

I'm short.

[Al Franken]

I have to. But you're like a bulldog.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

You know, so when I was growing up, I loved sandlot football. We always played football. And we had helmets we wore and shoulder pads. And really we would play the gangs. You were playing tackle. Tackle. We would play the gang, this gang. I mean, a real gang across town. And some of them had helmets, some didn't have helmets, but we all had helmets. And we would play at the football field when it was empty on Sunday, and we had no refs or anything. It was just all out football. So we were pretty tough. And I had a good arm. And I was a kicker, too, and a punter. And so when I'm graduating college, my friend Bill comes up. I never played in high school, organized football, or college football. My friend Bill, who used to lifeguard with me, came up, and he always wanted to play football, too, and so did I. He goes, hey, I found out if we take one class, a night class at Fairfield University, three credits that'll make us eligible to play on the football team. They have a club football team. So we signed up for criminology. It was a night course, and I think we went to three of those courses, but we were eligible to play football. So we went out there, we got the uniform, the helmets, and these guys weren't very good. They never won a game in, like 10 years. So the starting quarterback gets hurt.

[Kevin Nealon]

It gets less impressive.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, less impressive. But it didn't matter to me what it was. I just. I was happy to play. So, you know, we had some serious coaches there, too, and good managers. And I remember trying out, and the coaches were really impressed with my arm. And then they start kicking, and they're looking at each other like, who is this guy? You know? And I kept going back further and further to kick through the field goal, you know, the place kick. And then they started betting. They wanted to bet on whether I could get 10 yards out or 5 yards more. And so I think I won about 20 bucks on that tryout. So, yeah, so the starting quarterback got hurt, and by the end of the season, I was voted mvp and my friend Bill was nominated All American. So anyway, I love doing that. I love playing that. And I was working in a factory at the time, too, because I was just out of college. And I remember going to. I was in helicopter factory, Sikorsky Aircraft, where I worked for two years after college. And I would go to work. I mean, total contusions all over my body from getting hit and, you know, running. And you know, I ran a lot too with the ball. But yeah, I would go to this factory and people go, what? What happened to you? I said, oh, I was playing football over the weekend or whatever. And so I worked in that factory for two years. And the reason why I quit, I had BS in marketing where I learned about subliminal as well. And the foreman comes up to me, he goes, what's a young guy like you doing working in a place like this? And I thought about it and the truth was I said, well, I'm just working here enough to pay off my college loan and to get some traveling money for Europe. And he looked off and he kind of smiled and he goes, yeah, that's what I said 20 years ago. And it scared me so much. I think a week later I quit. Yeah, what's going on everyone? It's bluff here. And you know what's more American than America's 250th birthday? Supporting American owned companies like Spinquest, America's number one social casino with over a thousand games like Live Dealer, Blackjack and Craps. They're offering new users a 30 coin package for just $10. Go to spinquest.com and sign up today. Spin Quest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited.

[Kevin Nealon]

Visit spendquest.com for more details.

[Lady Luck (Spinquest Advertiser)]

Your body is constantly sending signals. But when daily stress and physical tension turn into static, it's hard to focus on anything else. Tune out the noise with the Signal Relief Patch. This revolutionary drug free wellness patch is designed to work with your body's natural electrical system to provide relief from daily discomfort in as little as seconds. Trusted over 33,000 people, Signal Relief is made to move with you so you can get back to the life you love. Whether it's stiffness from a workout or tension from a long commute, Signal Relief helps you feel better fast. Visit signalrelief.com today to take 20% off your purchase. Try it for 45 days and feel the difference or your money back. Signal Relief and Jovi are general wellness products intended to promote physical activity and a healthy lifestyle. Signal does not claim to treat, cure or diagnose disease. If you have concerns about your personal health conditions, please consult your physician. Do not use the Signal Relief Patch if you have a pacemaker, implantable pain management device, defibrillator or other neuromodulation implantable device. Do not use if you are pregnant. The Signal Relief Patch is not intended to be cut or altered in any way. And is not intended for internal use.

[Kevin Nealon]

Now you live in the Pacific Palisades?

[Al Franken]

I lived in the Palisades. No. So I was the honorary mayor of the Palisades. I lived there for 12 years. And so many memories from that place. My son pretty much grew up there.

[Kevin Nealon]

How old is he now?

[Al Franken]

He's like. He's 18. Yeah. Yeah. So I moved out of there two years ago. We sold our house for that very reason, because we were afraid of the fires and also the rattlesnakes because we lived up in the highland area and it was very dry.

[Kevin Nealon]

So you got out of there before the fires?

[Al Franken]

Before the fires. Although there were fires when we were there, I would see fires from my balcony that were like maybe a quarter mile away. So anyway, yeah, so we moved away from there, and our house that we lived in was totally destroyed. And all of our friends, everybody there lost their homes. We had a lot of friends there. You know, Martin Short lived there, Billy Crystal.

[Kevin Nealon]

And what's going to happen to that whole area?

[Al Franken]

Because they're going to rebuild it, and I think they're going to have some kind of a composition of these homes that are fireproof. But, you know, it's not just the material burning. It's what gets into the house and it's the toxic fumes and all that. So I don't know what they should do with that. Make it maybe a KOA campground or something. But I think people do want to move back. That's always kind of amazed me in California, whether there's mudslides or fires that totally destroy this area, the people, they have that desire to go.

[Kevin Nealon]

So where'd you move to? Where'd you move?

[Al Franken]

We moved by ucla. Okay. We live in a dorm. No, I live near ucla. But we were in the evacuation red flag zone, so we almost had to move out of there. And it's interesting when your house is being threatened. And I was out of town at the time, so I called my assistant. I said, would you please go back to the house? Because it's about to. It may be burning, and I need some valuable things out of there that I didn't know I would need to take. And it makes you realize what is really valuable to you. For me, it was external drives that had a lot of pictures on them and other business stuff. And then I had a guitar, a nice Gibson guitar that I wanted him to take. So a few days go by and the fire hasn't hit us yet. And I'm thinking of other stuff now, other stuff that I could need to get out of the house. So I send them back. It gets less and less each time I go back. And eventually it was, could you get that mechanical pencil that's on my desk? It might be near that eraser. Grab the eraser, too.

[Kevin Nealon]

And nothing happened to your house?

[Al Franken]

Thankfully nothing happened, but it kind of put a scare on us living in a canyon and having everything so dry.

[Kevin Nealon]

When I ask you about how many shows you do a year, People have

[Al Franken]

asked me that before. And I don't know, by shows, do you mean cities I go to or actual shows? Like, I could do five shows in one weekend in a city.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, how many cities do you do?

[Al Franken]

Well this year and last year was a lot more than typically. I would say probably I would do like weekends. Maybe 35 weekends, maybe 40 weekends.

[Kevin Nealon]

And how often do you change your material?

[Al Franken]

It's constantly changing. Constantly changing.

[Kevin Nealon]

Do you remember the piece? And I wrote this about Interested, Interested,

[Al Franken]

the porn review, which was a big, big thing for my. To this day, people say, oh, my God, that porn review thing you do. It was so funny.

[Kevin Nealon]

Do you still do it?

[Al Franken]

No, it was either between that or the black ski thing. Those are my two big crowd pleasers right there. No, I don't do it anymore because like I said, I'm always evolving. And I did that for a long time.

[Kevin Nealon]

Can you do it for us?

[Al Franken]

You want me to? You wrote it?

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, I wrote it.

[Al Franken]

Okay. I don't know.

[Kevin Nealon]

I wrote this for you on update, right?

[Al Franken]

We can update. Yeah. And it's evolved a lot since then. Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay.

[Al Franken]

You know, here's the crazy thing, Al. I get a call from Hustler magazine and they want to know if I would review three adult films for them and do a little write up for their magazine.

[Kevin Nealon]

These are adult films?

[Al Franken]

These are adult films. Yeah. And it's not really something I do, and I don't want to really have that reputation, but I love to write. I really love to write. So I said, yeah, sure, go ahead and send them on over to me.

[Kevin Nealon]

That's a good premise and the wrinkle.

[Al Franken]

So, okay, so the first video was called Wanda Whips Wall street. And this is starring Jessica Jameson. Very attractive. Found myself interested right away. Then I got more interested, more interested, very interested. And then suddenly no interest at all. The second video was called Delivery Boy, and this was starring Tina Wadsworth. Great story, great production value. Interested right off the bat. Then I got more interested, more interested, very interested. Suddenly no interest at all. I left the video running. I went into the kitchen, I made Myself a sandwich. I had a Diet Coke, some potato chips. Came back into the living room, the video was still running. Found myself interested again, interested, more interested, very interested. Then suddenly, no interest at all. Okay. The last video was called Rick and James Playday. Very skeptical at first, you know, very skeptical, very skeptical.

[Kevin Nealon]

Rick and James.

[Al Franken]

I said, you know, I got to be honest with you. I was very skeptical about this, this, this video. Skeptical, skeptical, more skeptical, very skeptical. Someone interested, interested, more interested, very interested. And then suddenly, no interest at all. Then ashamed, concerned, sad, disappointed, angry, mad. Someone interested. Someone interested, more interested, very interested than suddenly no interest at all. Then I rolled over and went to bed. That was your bit.

[Kevin Nealon]

That was my bit. Talk about now. We did talk a little bit about Tuesday night and how much fun it was. You got tired early, you went out at 2.

[Al Franken]

Tuesday night wasn't as much fun for me as it was for you or some other people in that space. That whole routine of writing All Night Tuesday was based on the original show where people were doing coke all night and able to stay up and would bring the sun up every morning.

[Kevin Nealon]

When I ran for office in Minnesota, the first interview I had from the Minneapolis Star Tribune, the guy asked me, when you were at Saturday Night Live, did you ever do cocaine? And I said, yes, but I only did it so that I could stay awake long enough to make sure that Belushi didn't do too much. He wrote it up as Al Franken acknowledged doing cocaine at Saturday Night Live, but only so he could stay up to make sure that actor John Belushi didn't do too much. Belushi later died of a drug overdose. That was my first brush with political reporting.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Yep.

[Kevin Nealon]

So I've done, we've done talked about Chippendales. Your hiking show is still. Are you still doing the hiking show?

[Al Franken]

I still do that. You did one of them? As a matter of fact, as my guest, I've been doing for, you know, minus the COVID years. Seven years, I mean, five years total of actually hiking. I've done like 150 of these hikes, you know, over the, over the period of time. Everyone from, you know, you, Conan o', Brien, Tom Hanks the other week, Paul Rudd, Sheryl Crow. Yeah, it's a lot of fun. When I first started, it was just with a cell phone. I would hold the cell phone out. I was hiking with Matthew Modine, you know, just we were both.

[Kevin Nealon]

Then you got one of those. What do you call it?

[Al Franken]

Then I got a selfie stick with a GoPro at the end of it.

[Kevin Nealon]

So that was high tech.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, my, you know, my material, relatively. Yeah, yeah. Well, GoPro has had different generations that got better and better, but all of my technical stuff got better over the years. So if you start watching from the beginning, you see it. I even went to a drone. I have a drone now that I fly. But I would edit. I edit myself.

[Kevin Nealon]

You have a drone? So the drone catches you guys.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, I'll take the drone up from the sky. From the sky. Or I'll have it in the woods. You know when you see us walking by. I've crashed about seven of these drones and I send them back to the company. I fix them and send them back. But it really adds a nice element to it. You know, I've gotten really good at it. Like, it'll come down the trail, go right over our heads.

[Kevin Nealon]

Wow.

[Al Franken]

It'll be a shot down thing. We're walking under it. You see the top of our heads or whatever. I mean, it's. I think I'm at the top of my game now. But the editing takes a long time. I had to learn how to edit. I had to learn how to fly a drone.

[Kevin Nealon]

So you don't have someone edit for you?

[Al Franken]

No. In fact, whenever I show up for a hike, they'll say, people normally say, where's the rest of the crew? Yeah, I said, I'm the crew. Here, let me put this mic down your shirt. And it's been fun to do, but every time I decide that it's too much work, I'll say, okay, I've done enough of these. I want to have time to do other things too. Somebody will come up to me and go, dude, I love that hiking show. Who's on next? You got. Oh, man, don't ever stop doing that thing.

[Kevin Nealon]

There you go.

[Al Franken]

There you go. I remember we were hiking Will Rogers State park, which is no longer there, that burned. That burned down. And there was a guy coming down from the other end of the trail down the hill from Canada. He was from Canada. And he said how much he loved the show. I think, wow, you walked all the way from Canada to tell me how much you like the show? That's a fan right there. But yeah, it's been on for a long time and people do like it. And sometimes in a club, I'll talk about this hiking show. And at first it was just a smattering of applause. And then it became. It's like maybe a quarter of the room now has seen it. And it entices them. Other people to go home and watch

[Kevin Nealon]

it, talk about Farley for a bit. Remember when we played basketball and it turned out Farley was actually quite a good athlete?

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

And graceful.

[Al Franken]

Very graceful. That was the thing that shocked me. Well, first of all, you gotta remember he played rugby in college and he wasn't always the weight he was. I'm always amazed at someone carrying that much weight when they're agile like that. It really doesn't make sense to me.

[Kevin Nealon]

Right.

[Al Franken]

Because it's not often you see that even he did the skating routine right in 30 Rock.

[Kevin Nealon]

Right.

[Al Franken]

And how good he was great and good at falling and. But yeah, he was. He was amazing, but a train wreck, as we know.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, well, he was brilliant.

[Al Franken]

He was brilliant.

[Kevin Nealon]

And, you know, he evidently had his issues.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, he did have his issues. Did you hear the story about. I think Jay Moore tells it the best. Farley comes into. Up on the 17th floor of the writer's wing in Sandler's office is there he shares with Tim Meadows and Spade and Chris Rock is nearby. And Farley comes in and he goes, hey, guys, I'm gonna drop my pants and stick my. Making this nicer. Stick my butt out the window and take a big old dump down on the 50th Street. And they're egging him on. They go, do it, do it. So sure enough, he drops his pants, he sticks his butt out there, and he takes this big old dump, but he's not out far enough, so it lands on the windowsill, and it's still there to this day. It's a big stop on the NBC tour.

[Kevin Nealon]

That was Farley.

[Al Franken]

That was Farley. Man, he was amazing. Yeah, people love him. They still love him. Him and Norm. I just wish Jan Hooks got more accolades than she does. I think Jan was right up there with at least, you know, the top three.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, Jan was amazing. You said she was very insecure about how she was.

[Al Franken]

She had stage fright. I mean, immense stage fright. And Friday nights, often I would be with her, trying to assure her that she's going to be great because she is great.

[Kevin Nealon]

And she was always great.

[Al Franken]

And she'd get out there and all of a sudden it's like she had no stage fright at all. And she would kill it. And then it's the same thing over and over every week. Wow. So, you know, it was kind of torture for her, but yet she must have been. It must have been gratifying in some respect. That show is not for everybody. You know, there's a lot of great improv players that Just could not handle that schedule. Whether it's writing all night on Tuesday or, you know, the quiet competitiveness that goes on there. People always say it's competitive, right? Yeah, but in a quiet way.

[Kevin Nealon]

I also think the cast members, you know, 20 cast members or whatever they have now makes the competition ridiculous.

[Al Franken]

Oh, my God. I can't imagine.

[Kevin Nealon]

And it means that not everybody gets on every week. And when you had seven like we had, or eight, when you, like, you had. Everybody gets on, everybody gets to do stuff, and you stop being nervous if you're doing enough stuff.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. After the first year, we all decided we should unpack our suitcases. We're staying, you know, because we were living out of our suitcase the first year we were on. But, yeah, I can't imagine with all the cast members they have on now, it's. You know, if you're sitting on the bench too long, you see what's in the cards for you. You know, you're going to. You got to get in there. You got to get in there. And sometimes I remember Bernie Brillstein once told me, as it was near the end of my career, he said, wait a minute.

[Kevin Nealon]

Not the end of your career at snl?

[Al Franken]

Yeah, I thought it was the end of my career. But anyway, it was the last season where I was taking off Weekend Update, but Bernie Brillstein was able to get me another year on there. But he goes, you gotta be, you know, you gotta really work hard. And I always worked hard on that show, so I didn't know what he's talking about. And so somehow, because Bernie Brillstein was also Loren's manager, and he kind of, you know, he was inspiration, inspirational in getting that whole show together, I think, because he managed Lorne Michaels, so he got me that extra year. And he said, but you gotta be really. Get in there and do good work and get up, you know? And I said, okay, Bernie, I'm gonna keep doing what I always do. He goes, you gotta be more of a squeaky wheel. And I didn't know how to be a squeaky wheel. You know, I'd be more passive aggressive than just silk, you know, walk off.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah.

[Al Franken]

So I. Only thing I could do as close to a squeaky wheel was like, an annoying wheel, you know, like a. Like the nails across us, you know, Chalkboard. Yeah. So I don't think maybe that was the next to last year.

[Kevin Nealon]

So you did a year after you left Update?

[Al Franken]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

Okay.

[Al Franken]

Only because of the pull of Bernie Brillstein. But there was also a period where Lauren was hesitant about asking me back. I can't even remember why. But I had to wait a long time that summer before I was invited back.

[Kevin Nealon]

Oh, and that stuff stings.

[Al Franken]

Well, you know, it's a good base to start forming some neuroses and insecurities, you know, I mean, I had a great childhood growing up. My parents were great. And I know some of the actors on there didn't, unfortunately. So they look to Lorne as a father figure. And even without looking to him as a father figure, he's great at what he does. And I like Lorne a lot. To this day, 30 years later, I could be tying my shoelaces. And sometimes I'll think, I wonder if Lorne would like the way I'm tying my shoelace right now. Or do you think I should do two loops and then tie it? Or are these shoes the right shoes?

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, well, he has that kind of effect.

[Al Franken]

Yeah, he's really good at what he does or the position he's in. And he hires the right people, mostly. When I left snl, my time was up. I was ready to go because I think I was bored. I was bored. I was going out and doing sketches with food in my mouth from the craft service table. I was still chewing it as I was doing my sketches. And I had friends in my dressing room crowded in there who were talking about. And they had the TV on, but they were watching something else. And I could almost hear the blender from out on the stage. I thought it might be time to leave.

[Kevin Nealon]

How many years did you do?

[Al Franken]

I did nine years. Nine years. And then I thought, would there ever be anything better that I'll be going to after this show? It didn't matter because I was ready to leave. And then Weeds came along on Showtime. Weeds with Mary Louise Parker. And that ran for eight years. And that was also one of the highlights of my career, aside from doing the Tonight show with Johnny Carson and also doing snl. But that show was really such a great stepping off project for me from snl, even though it wasn't live.

[Kevin Nealon]

And I think you were the cast. Won an Emmy for the whole cast.

[Al Franken]

Yeah. Yeah. But, you know, the funny thing about some of these shows, it's like that show, the Bear. Is it called the Bear or Bear? And it's the same with Weeds. They're in the comedy category. And it's really difficult to win a comedy award when you're up against real comedy shows. And instead of having these dramatic shows that have some comedic, you know, instances in them. So I think we could have won a lot more if we were put in a different category, but I'm not big on awards. I even asked you, I said, did we win an Emmy ever on snl? Because I couldn't remember.

[Kevin Nealon]

No, we did.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

So there. You didn't put them up on your mantle?

[Al Franken]

No. I don't even know where it is. Do we all get one or copy.

[Kevin Nealon]

Yeah, it's one of the. You could get an Emmy for. And I don't think they did it by an episode. They just. It was about. For the year.

[Al Franken]

Yeah.

[Kevin Nealon]

But. Yep, yep, we got Emmys. We all got Emmys. Well, thanks.

[Al Franken]

Oh, thank you.

[Kevin Nealon]

Thanks for coming here with a cold. I know you could have done. I could have done it at home, but I asked you.

[Al Franken]

I came here with a cold and what else? An attitude.

[Kevin Nealon]

The right kind of attitude.

[Al Franken]

The right kind of attitude. Because I'm what, the attitude guy? I could play any attitude.

[Kevin Nealon]

That's right.

[Al Franken]

Like right now I'm playing an attitude. Like, I'm really having fun. No, this is great. Thanks, Al.

[Kevin Nealon]

Well, I hope you enjoyed listening. That beautiful music is by Leo Kotke. The great Leo Kotke. I want to thank Peter Ogburn for producing this podcast. We'll talk again next week.

[Al Franken]

Oh, I have had no luck lately.

[Kevin Nealon]

Wait. Lady Luck.

[Lady Luck (Spinquest Advertiser)]

Ritzky. I got you. I've had so much luck on spinquest.com they have all of my favorite games, slot games, live, blackjack craps and bubble craps. You can even get a 30 coin pack for just 10 bucks.

[Al Franken]

10 bucks for 30. I'm headed over to spinquest.com right now. Spin Quest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited.

[Kevin Nealon]

Visit spinquest.com for more details.