You’re not trying to control people. You’re trying to help. But what if your “help” is quietly draining your team’s confidence, creativity, and trust? In this episode, I sit down with Professor Julia Milner of EDHEC Business School to talk about the psychology of micromanagement, especially the kind that comes from anxiety, care, and good intentions. We dive into the difference between constructive feedback and control disguised as questions, the “advice trap” that keeps leaders stuck, and why micromanaging often feels safer in the moment but costs you long-term trust, dialogue, and time. Tune in to learn how to replace fixing with serving, advice with curiosity, and control with empowerment.

Check out our sponsors:

Northwest Registered Agent - Protect your privacy, build your brand and get your complete business identity in just 10 clicks and 10 minutes! Visit https://www.northwestregisteredagent.com/achieverfree

Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to http://shopify.com/anxiousachiever

Talkiatry - Head to http://talkiaitry.com/achiever and complete the short assessment to get matched with an in network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.

Working Genius - Take the working genius assessment today and get 20% off with code ACHIEVER at working http://genius.com

Brevo - Meet brevo, the all in one marketing and CRM platform built to help you connect with customers, boost engagement and grow your business smarter. Go to brevo.com/achiever and use code ACHIEVER50 for 50% off.

In this Episode, You Will Learn

00:00 Why micromanagers often act from anxiety.

04:15 How to spot motivational micromanagement.

06:30 Why do you hate being micromanaged?

12:00 How micromanagement increases anxiety on both sides.

14:15 The subtle way “questions” can shut down dialogue.

18:00 How to give upward feedback without triggering defensiveness.

20:45 What it means to adopt a coaching mindset.

22:00 Phrases you can use to reset a micromanaging dynamic.

28:45 What’s the difference between feedback and feed forward?

30:30 How do you treat yourself with grace?

33:00 What the best empowering leaders all have in common.

Resources + Links

Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever

Watch the podcast on YouTube

Find more resources on our website morraam.com

Follow

Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam

Follow Prof. Julia on LinkedIn @drjuliamilner