The Autism Little Learners Podcast

Host: Tara Phillips
Episode #158: AAC Shouldn't Have to Be Earned
Release Date: January 20, 2026

Overview

In this episode, speech-language pathologist Tara Phillips challenges a pervasive and harmful belief in supporting autistic children: the idea that access to AAC (Augmentative and Alternative Communication) should be conditional on a child's regulation or calmness. Tara reframes AAC not as a compliance-based tool but as a fundamental access and self-advocacy mechanism, especially crucial during moments of dysregulation. The episode offers compassionate, neurodiversity-affirming strategies and practical steps educators, parents, and caregivers can take to support children's communication at all states of regulation.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. AAC as an Access Tool, Not a Reward (00:10)

• Tara emphasizes that AAC is not something to be earned through calm or compliant behavior. Instead, it is a critical means of expressing needs at all moments, particularly when dysregulated.
• Core insight: The body's state during dysregulation makes all communication—spoken or through AAC—harder, which is a biological response, not a willful refusal.

"AAC is not just a communication tool, it's an access tool. And access depends heavily on regulation."
— Tara Phillips, 00:18

2. How Dysregulation Affects Communication (01:05)

• When children (and even adults) are overwhelmed, their ability to access communication—whether speaking, signing, or using AAC—diminishes drastically.
• Expectations that children can "use their words" only after calming down are both developmentally inappropriate and exacerbate exclusion.

"When a child is dysregulated, overwhelmed, or in survival mode, accessing any form of communication... is incredibly hard. That's not a failure, it's biology." — Tara Phillips, 01:22

3. The Harmful Myth: Communication Must Be Earned (02:00)

• Many adults mistakenly withhold AAC during meltdowns or tough moments, thinking kids must first become calm to access communication tools.
• This approach mirrors a tactic never used with neurotypical children's spoken language and can make stressful moments even harder.

"We don't take away spoken language when children are upset and we don't say, use your words. Once you're calm, AAC should be treated the same."
— Tara Phillips, 02:38

4. Communication Supports Regulation (03:10)

• Having access to AAC—especially to words like "stop," "help," "all done," "break," and "wait"—is not about managing behavior but about allowing self-advocacy and reducing frustration.
• Trust and regulation are built when children are always allowed to communicate.

"Words like stop, help, all done, break, and wait are not behavioral tools. They're self advocacy tools." — Tara Phillips, 03:43

5. True Accessibility Means AAC Is Always Available (04:15)

• AAC should be accessible all day: in transitions, play, outside, at snack times, during fun, and in tough moments—not just at the table or during lessons.
• Without this, AAC ceases to be a real means of expression for the child.

"AAC needs to live in the real moments of the day... during joyful fun times, and during dysregulation." — Tara Phillips, 04:26

6. How to Model AAC During Dysregulation (Without Pressure) (05:00)

• Adults should model the use of AAC during dysregulation without expecting the child to respond or interact with the device.
• For example, calmly pressing "stop" or "help" on the child's AAC device from their perspective when relevant, with no prompting or correction.

"No prompting, no correcting, no pressure, just presence and access. Even if the child doesn't even touch the AAC device, they're still learning." — Tara Phillips, 05:30

7. Consequences of Withholding AAC in Hard Moments (06:10)

• Removing AAC during tough times teaches children that communication is unavailable when they need it most and may make them less likely to seek support in the future.
• Conversely, keeping AAC available sends a regulating, trust-building message.

"When AAC is taken away during hard moments, children learn something, just not what we want them to learn." — Tara Phillips, 06:15

"You're allowed to communicate even when you're upset. That message alone can be regulating."
— Tara Phillips, 06:53

8. Adult Discomfort and Misconceptions (07:00)

• Tara acknowledges that adults may feel discomfort about “reinforcing behaviors” or “using AAC incorrectly,” but reiterates AAC is not a behavioral tool or a prize.
• Consistency matters more than perfection.

"AAC is not a reward and it's not a behavior strategy. It's access. And remember that access should never be conditional."
— Tara Phillips, 07:10

9. Benefits of Consistent AAC Access (07:55)

• Over time, continuous AAC access leads to:
  • Better trust between children and adults
  • Spontaneous, flexible communication
  • Reduced frustration and meltdowns
  • Stronger relationships

"When AAC is available across regulation states, children begin to trust the system, engage more spontaneously, use communication more flexibly..." — Tara Phillips, 08:10

10. Practical Steps and Recap (08:55)

• Keep AAC available during dysregulation—even if unused.
• Model a single regulation-related word (“help,” “stop,” “all done”) without expecting a response.
• Focus on engagement, not output.
• Build trust first—communication grows from trust and safety.

"Notice changes in engagement, not output. Trust builds before communication does." — Tara Phillips, 09:20

• Tara reassures listeners that shifting practice doesn’t require overhaul; small, consistent steps have a big impact.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “AAC doesn’t require perfection, it requires access. And when access is paired with regulation and trust, communication can grow.”

  • Tara Phillips, 11:01

• "You’re doing important work and the small supports you put into place matter. Keep leading with connection..."

  • Tara Phillips, 11:17

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|----------------------------------------| | 00:00 | Introduction to the issue | | 00:18 | AAC as an access tool | | 01:05 | Effects of dysregulation | | 02:00 | Myths about "earning" communication | | 02:38 | Spoken language vs. AAC expectations | | 03:43 | Self-advocacy through AAC | | 04:26 | Making AAC truly accessible | | 05:00 | Modeling AAC during dysregulation | | 06:15 | Lessons learned from withholding AAC | | 06:53 | The message of trust and regulation | | 07:10 | Overcoming adult discomfort | | 08:10 | Positive outcomes from consistent access| | 09:20 | Practical steps and encouragement | | 11:01 | The core philosophy restated |

Final Takeaways

• AAC should always be available, especially during tough moments.
• Communication is a right, not a reward for compliance or regulation.
• Modeling AAC without expectation is powerful—even if the child isn’t actively using it yet.
• Small shifts by adults create safer, more trusting, and more communicative environments for autistic children.

For further resources and AAC visuals, Tara references upcoming supports and encourages listeners to participate in her AAC Boot Camp.