#493 - Joe Had A Dream About Frank

Summary

The Basement Yard Podcast Episode #493 - "Joe Had A Dream About Frank"

Release Date: March 10, 2025

In Episode #493 of The Basement Yard, hosts Joe Santagato and Frank engage in a lively and heartfelt conversation that navigates through personal dreams, nostalgic memories, pop culture insights, and humorous banter. This detailed summary captures the essence of their discussion, highlighting key moments, notable quotes, and the natural flow of their dialogue.

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1. Introduction to the Episode

The episode begins with Joe and Frank warmly welcoming listeners back to the show. Their casual and friendly demeanor sets the tone for an engaging and relatable conversation.

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2. Joe's Dream About Frank (00:00 - 18:06)

Joe Shares His Dream: Joe opens up about a dream he had involving Frank. In the dream, Joe is struggling to communicate in the back seat of a car, trying to get Frank's attention without success.

Joe: "I was trying to get your attention so you'd shake me and I'd wake up." (13:49)

Frank's Interpretation: Frank interprets the dream as a subconscious indication that Joe might have something on his mind, encouraging him to open up.

Frank: "I think this sounds like there might be something that you want to talk to me about, but you may not feel right." (14:32)

Emotional Exchange: The conversation becomes introspective as they discuss the importance of communication and emotional honesty in their friendship.

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3. Discussion on Hooters' Bankruptcy (35:00 - 38:31)

Hooters Filing for Bankruptcy: Joe and Frank delve into the news of Hooters filing for bankruptcy, analyzing what it means for the brand and its future.

Frank: "It means they start liquidating their assets and figuring out ways to stop losing as much money as they are spending." (37:23)

Personal Experiences: They reminisce about their past experiences with Hooters, sharing humorous and candid stories about their visits and the evolving nature of the establishment.

Joe: "I've been in Hooters way more times than I have." (34:10)

Bankruptcy Chapters: The hosts discuss different types of bankruptcy filings, clarifying misconceptions and explaining the implications of Chapter 7 versus Chapter 11.

Joe: "Chapter 11 is just, like, we are not, like, going away completely, but, like, we're gonna start restructuring, pay all our bills." (37:54)

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4. Nostalgic Reminiscing: Childhood Memories (38:00 - 44:17)

Beer Towers and Gadgets: Joe and Frank nostalgically talk about their childhood indulgences in beer towers, beer pong tables, and other drinking paraphernalia they had from fairs and parties.

Frank: "We had the beer pong table. That not only lasted forever, we brought it with us to several dozen places." (44:17)

School Days and Friendships: They share amusing anecdotes from their school days, including mischievous acts, friendship dynamics, and memorable events that shaped their early years.

Joe: "I had a red one or a pink." (12:07)

Hermit Crab Story: Frank recounts the story of a hermit crab named Miss Crabtree that Joe's neighbor might have lost, adding a humorous twist to their childhood adventures.

Joe: "How fast could it have gotten away?" (12:51)

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5. Pop Culture and "Beef Boys" (52:00 - 60:06)

Introduction of the Beef Boys: Frank introduces the concept of "Beef Boys," a recurring theme where they discuss various celebrity feuds and pop culture beefs.

Frank: "The Beef Boys are back. Joey and Frankie, the Beef Boys are back." (52:19)

Boy Meets World Podcast: They analyze the Boy Meets World podcast, reminiscing about their favorite episodes and character dynamics, especially focusing on Topanga and Sean Hunter.

Joe: "Topanga, Topanga, Topanga. If you go after Topanga, this boy is gonna make sure you meet the afterworld." (58:44)

Celebrity Beefs: Joe and Frank touch upon other notable celebrity beefs, providing their humorous takes and perspectives on the often trivial disputes in the public eye.

Frank: "They blow up the balloons now." (28:24)

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6. Final Reminiscing and Wrap-Up (60:00 - 76:50)

School Memories: The hosts continue to delve into their past, discussing old friends, memorable school events, and the innocence of childhood misunderstandings.

Joe: "I have no idea. Do you remember me and Kelsey being best friends?" (71:22)

Beer Tower Ideas: Joe humorously suggests incorporating beer towers into future podcast episodes, blending their love for beer-related gadgets with their show’s content.

Frank: "We get someone like a Tai chi master in here to do those moves on us." (62:33)

Closing Remarks: In their closing moments, Joe and Frank invite listeners to follow their show on social media, promote upcoming events, and express gratitude for their audience's support.

Joe: "Follow me at Joe Santa. Go. Frank, when they find you." (76:43)

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Joe on His Dream: "I was trying to get your attention so you'd shake me and I'd wake up." (13:49)
• Frank on Hooters' Bankruptcy: "It means they start liquidating their assets and figuring out ways to stop losing as much money as they are spending." (37:23)
• Frank on Beer Pong Table: "We had the beer pong table. That not only lasted forever, we brought it with us to several dozen places." (44:17)
• Frank Introducing Beef Boys: "The Beef Boys are back. Joey and Frankie, the Beef Boys are back." (52:19)
• Joe on Topanga: "If you go after Topanga, this boy is gonna make sure you meet the afterworld." (58:44)

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Conclusion

Episode #493 of The Basement Yard offers a rich tapestry of conversations that blend humor, nostalgia, and genuine reflection. Joe and Frank's dynamic interaction provides listeners with both entertainment and relatable moments, making it a valuable episode for both long-time fans and new listeners seeking an engaging podcast experience.

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Subscribe and Follow: Stay updated with Joe and Frank by following The Basement Yard on TikTok and Instagram. Visit thebasementyard.com for more content and to submit questions or show prompts.

Transcript

[A]

Welcome back to the base. Welcome back to the basement yard. How's it going, Francis?

[B]

Doing well. Ah, Co. Francisco. Don't. Don't do. Don't. Don't do that. I don't like that. I'm very. I like my name, so I want you to make sure it's proper.

[A]

Francisco.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Does anyone call you that? I don't think anyone calls you that.

[B]

No. My mom, like, you know, the typical. Like when my mom was mad at.

[A]

Me, she would say Francisco.

[B]

She'd be like, francisco.

[A]

I think I've heard your mom call you that.

[B]

My mom also called me Cisco for a while, which, you know, 1999, I was pumped.

[A]

Yeah. You know you loved the Thong song.

[B]

Hold on.

[A]

You loved the thong.

[B]

Don't say that. Pointing fingers. The world loved the Thong Song. I didn't know what a thong was at that time, so I just liked it because it was a catchy tune.

[A]

Frank, we knew what a thong was.

[B]

You think in second grade we knew what a thong was.

[A]

Was that second grade?

[B]

Yeah. 1999.

[A]

The thong song, probably.

[B]

I don't think I knew what a thong, bro.

[A]

We knew Lita and we knew Lita had her thumb song.

[B]

Lita wasn't really popular until, like, 2001. Joey. At the time, in 1999, if she was even there, she was with SA Rio, so. Who she broke into the WWE. WWF at the time with.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And then she joined in with the Hardy Boys.

[A]

Did I tell you? I didn't tell you, but I. I recently watched the TLC match from WrestleMania.

[B]

And it's still great.

[A]

And Lita pops out. I totally forgot that she shows.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Like, look at her. She's got her thong out.

[B]

Oh, yeah, bro. That's all it took.

[A]

That's a little piece of underwear.

[B]

But the Dung song was. It was an American. It's an American staple.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

You know, he was in. Cisco Blew Up. He was in movies, remember? There are other songs on that album, too.

[A]

I don't remember that.

[B]

People gonna make me unleash the dragon, you know, I don't really wanna unleash the drag. He loved Dragon Cisco.

[A]

More than a lot of people.

[B]

No, that was, like, the only two good songs on that album that I remember.

[A]

Sorry, Cisco.

[B]

I mean.

[A]

Oh, yeah, he might be watching.

[B]

Is Cisco still around?

[A]

Of course he's around.

[B]

Is his hair still silver?

[A]

It's not.

[B]

Can we look up? I love how we're looking at the tv as if. And thinks we're not asking him subtly.

[A]

It's just anytime Frankie has a Question or says anything or, like, goes like this. He's asking you.

[B]

I know, but also, it's only like when we're looking up stuff like. I just want to see a recent image of Cisco. Yeah, Cisco Systems. By the way, WI Fi. You fucking ruined an American staple hip hop artist. Cisco.

[A]

Have you never heard of Cisco? I'm having trouble. You've never heard of the Thong Song? I've heard of that. I didn't know who sang it.

[B]

You didn't know? So who do you think saying it?

[A]

God, no. Also not that. How'd you get there?

[B]

Hip hop Cisco.

[A]

You spent Cisco like an idiot, first of all.

[B]

Also, that's not Cisco. Yeah.

[A]

Who the fuck is this guy?

[B]

Is that Klay Thompson in the first picture?

[A]

I don't know who that is. Type in love and hip hop.

[B]

S, I, s, Q, O. I think so. Yeah. I think there's a Q in there. Yep. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Cisco could have given me a thousand tries.

[B]

Is that actually. Wait, if that's actually Cisco.

[A]

What?

[B]

Type in thong song. Cisco 2025. If that's Cisco today, why are you.

[A]

Typing in love and hip hop? There he is. Cisco. That was like a Hispanic man.

[B]

It looks like that was a. That was a. Yeah, I think that's Francisco Cisco. Thong song. But type in 2025, Cisco.

[A]

Like that. 2025.

[B]

Cisco. Thong Song 2025. Do we have what?

[A]

Is never going to find it.

[B]

Oh, that's a.

[A]

Maybe he's off the map. There he is. This is. Wait.

[B]

Teams up with the New York Philharmonic.

[A]

He didn't.

[B]

That can't be real. That can't be real.

[A]

I don't even know what is that? The Philharmonic?

[B]

It's like a. Like a group of, like, harmonica. No, but like, they're like legit musicians. Like you've never heard of. Like the Philharmonic. They do.

[A]

Oh, dude, you ever hear Cisco hit those notes?

[B]

I know.

[A]

Legit music.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Well, Baby said, I like the way.

[B]

You move that thing.

[A]

That's a great.

[B]

Is that Maya? Is that Cisco?

[A]

Frank, this is also an audio show. I think we should ditch the Cisco.

[B]

All right, all right, all right. I mean, wherever Cisco may be, I hope in a good place, he's doing well. And I hope he is surrounded by harmonic right. You know?

[A]

You loved. You loved that, though.

[B]

Who didn't? Don't sleep on Cisco.

[A]

I'm not sleeping on sis.

[B]

Don't sleep on sis.

[A]

No, I'm saying, like, everyone liked the Thong Song. Was very popular song. I feel like you liked it a little bit more like you were like, yo, I love thong songs.

[B]

Well, I think I felt cool because I watched the, like making. Remember when MTV was about music and it used to do like the making of the video and it was just like a 25 minute video of women in thongs of like, we're making something groundbreaking here and it's like Cisco playing like the drums on a butt on the beach.

[A]

Yeah, what's better than that?

[B]

And. And then at the end they'd be like the worldwide debut of the thong song video that came out and rocked my world as a little seven year old, let me tell you.

[A]

Wow. Wow. I can't believe we were 7 years old that came out.

[B]

I felt like I was older maybe. Maybe, maybe because you were like reading Playboys at that age.

[A]

I wasn't reading Playboys at seven, was I?

[B]

There was the one in like that alleyway behind your house.

[A]

I was seven.

[B]

I'm pretty sure we were seven years old when we were looking at that.

[A]

First of all, no one's reading that. I was looking and analyzing. Okay. I just wanted to see a boob then.

[B]

Yeah, you probably did at that time.

[A]

Weird the things that you do, you know, that was a weird time. And then we've obviously told these stories before, but for people who don't know new. New viewers or whatever the case may be. There was a Playboy stuffed into the crack of an old garage at the top of my block that I would go, yeah. And I don't know how it got there. I think my neighbor put it there. But we would go and be like, oh. And then we look at boobs and we shove it back into the crack.

[B]

We were very. We didn't want to take it. It was a communal Playboy. Anyone else wanted to go and get there? Urban legend.

[A]

Oh, there's a Playboy in the crack of the old garage at the top of the block. And you can go get it. Like, it was like being able to play with fossils of dinosaurs. And then around the block there was a. The, the pay phone that I would call 1-800-like-BOBS, piss. Boobs, piss. And then they would be like, too.

[B]

Many, too many numbers. But you know what I meant to. You know.

[A]

But it'd be like, welcome to 1-800-Boobs. And you just heard a, like a woman saying something.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We called one of those once on an episode where it was like 1-800-like-.

[A]

We called a whole hundred of them. Yeah.

[B]

And it's just like, oh, you want to do it? Yeah, give me your credit card.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

Dude, 1-800-Piss Girls.

[B]

That's how people in the 80s and early 90s used to get off phone sex. It was like they had, like, chat rooms for phone calls.

[A]

I'm sure that still exists.

[B]

Is it like a big industry? Like a phone sex operator?

[A]

I don't know, bro. You spend a million hours a night with your girlfriends on the phone. You get it?

[B]

We weren't doing fucking. Like, we weren't talking. I was talking about, like, oh, man, my fucking. This chapter. Catcher in the Rye really sucks. You think we were going. You think we were doing, like, us? Like, what are you wearing? And I'd be like, frank Scooby Doo boxers.

[A]

Frank, I know that you've done.

[B]

No, I will tell you that, like, when I. Yeah, when I got older. Yeah, but like, when I was like, at that age where it would be like, we stay on the phone all night. It was not that. It was just like, let's just sleep and keep the phone there.

[A]

I don't know. I think you lie.

[B]

Why would I have to lie about that?

[A]

I don't know. When did you get a cell phone? I was. I was at least 15.

[B]

I can tell you when that whole, like, stay up all night on the phone thing was, and it was after I'd had the phone for a couple years, at that point.

[A]

Phone sex? Phone sex.

[B]

No. If we did. I'm being very honest.

[A]

You've never sex on the phone with.

[B]

Course I have. Of course I have.

[A]

That's all you're saying?

[B]

But I'm saying at the time, that's not what the. It was just for, like, comfort of. Just, like, you want to. You know, I just want to know someone's there on the phone. And, like, if I roll over and it's like, you can hear someone is. You know, they're there breathing and snoring and stuff, and is looking at us like we're psychotic right now.

[A]

You've never stayed up all night on the phone with your girlfriend? No, I have. I have. I just don't believe he didn't ask for, like, a kiss or something.

[B]

Oh, of course. I'd be like, give me a good night kiss.

[A]

Yeah. And then he'd be like, that's not a good one. Give me another one. Something like that. Or dial 3 if you like me or some.

[B]

I don't. I mean, it's. Honestly, it's not impossible, but I don't think that you did you.

[A]

I know I'm acting like you're 11, but, like, did you do that thing ever where you have your boy call another girl, but on a three way, but you're quiet to find out if she likes you.

[B]

No, bro, three way. He's 24 years old. You think they were doing that at that time? Three way calls.

[A]

How old are you? 28. 24, exactly.

[B]

Yeah, you're right.

[A]

Too far away.

[B]

The good old days of being able to just like go up the block.

[A]

And look at a porno in a.

[B]

Cracked garage back as a child. I probably shouldn't label it that way, but like the atrocities of the world were so out of our mindset. We didn't, you know, had a sight out of mind we didn't get.

[A]

That was like all the way in.

[B]

Manhattan, all the way across the river.

[A]

Yeah, but in Queens.

[B]

But in Queens, all we cared about, baby. Just a.

[A]

It's a souvlaki guy in the corner. Cuz I'm hungry.

[B]

Hell yeah.

[A]

Is Babalu who drives the ice cream truck coming around? Cuz I want some ice cream.

[B]

Babalu. That and also got in trouble for cocaine, but we don't talk about that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, but I mean, listen, I don't know what was in that Great White shark popsicle, but it was delicious. I'll take a hundred of them.

[A]

Yeah, no, that sounded like a little crazy, right? Because we always talk about how we went into the ice cream truck.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We were like, yo, I don't know what was in that great white popsicle, but I had a hundred. Chill.

[B]

I mean, remembers Great White Shark popsicles.

[A]

Those were wet. You like the crackest stuff.

[B]

They were delicious. They were lemon.

[A]

You were, you were. They were.

[B]

They were lemon.

[A]

Those are much better than the, the Ninja Turtle ones that you love. So fuck you. Another Tweety Bird.

[B]

Also fuck you.

[A]

Wait, which one's gray? Bugs Bunny.

[B]

Delicious. I still get it.

[A]

No, that one's the wackest one.

[B]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[A]

They're all the same flavor.

[B]

I think the people that hate the episodes where we're screaming are a little upset at us right now.

[A]

Fuck yeah.

[B]

Fuck you guys.

[A]

We're talking about ice cream.

[B]

We love you. No, I, I. The, The Ninja Turtles. They've butchered my boys. Old Ninja Turtles were huge.

[A]

Can someone explain how hard it could possibly be to put the gumball eyes in the right place?

[B]

It's not, it's not because a person is doing it. It's a machine.

[A]

I know, but like, what? We don't care anymore?

[B]

I think, yeah, probably. I think that they probably don't care anymore.

[A]

I hate when I Open it up. And it's like, oh, we got an eye here. And I. Here. What is this?

[B]

I mean, honestly, I am fully on board with just replacing those gumballs. They're not gum. I don't know what they are. It's dust. So just take them out entirely and just put something in there. You know, a blueberry flavored eyeball or something.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Or like the eyes in a. In a rabbit. A chocolate bunny. Those eyes are.

[B]

Oh, I thought.

[A]

You're not an actual rabbit. Chocolate bunny question, though.

[B]

No.

[A]

Do you remember back in the day where it was like your keychain? It was good luck to have a rabbit's foot?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That wasn't a rabbit's foot, right?

[B]

I think it might have been, brother.

[A]

A real rabbit's foot.

[B]

I think it might have been.

[A]

And also, why is that good luck? That was so popular. I had one that was. Right.

[B]

I had. Yeah, I had one, too. Well, yours was probably fake because rabbits are not red.

[A]

I remember they could diet.

[B]

Well, I mean, maybe. I mean, Frank, that originated from folklore with some theory suggesting it might be linked to Hand of Glory, a sever hanged criminal, which was believed to bring luck in European tradition. So this is what we were walking.

[A]

Around with on our keys.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Type in a rabbit's foot keychain. We had these back in the day, and it was like a cool thing to have in your keychain. And my sister had a bunch. Yeah, it looked like that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That was hanging off my keys.

[B]

Where were they? Just. Oh, but they weren't real.

[A]

They were like.

[B]

No, some of them look like they might have been.

[A]

The conviction. No, no, some of them look like they were real maybe. I don't know, possibly. But yeah, see, I had like a red one or a pink.

[B]

I had one of those. I had one of those, too. Or I mean, at some point. I don't remember exactly what.

[A]

I think I won one at a fair.

[B]

Yeah, listen, the amount of stuff that I had from fairs, they were giving out. Goldfish, rabbit's feet, Xboxes.

[A]

They gave out.

[B]

It was a lot. When. When the. When the carnival or the fair or festival, whatever you guys called it, Fair Feast, some places called it rolled into town, and that was a lawless section of the community at that point in time.

[A]

My mom hated that because me and Keith would come home with some animal and she'd be like, I'm. What am I doing?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

We came home with a. With a hermit crab.

[B]

That sucks.

[A]

Dude named it Miss Crabtree. And Keith wanted it to like, run around and, like, open the thing, and then it just ran away.

[B]

How fast could it have gotten away?

[A]

Yo, honestly, now that I'm thinking about it, maybe my mom just tossed it.

[B]

Yeah, I was gonna say, have you seen a hermit crab? How fast they move? They're pretty slow. Brag.

[A]

I owned one.

[B]

Okay, then you should know that it was probably bullshit from the start.

[A]

Well, Mrs. Crabtree. Frank, I was a child.

[B]

Top speed, four inches per second. That's what Joe measures in, first of all.

[A]

That's very fast. Four inches per second.

[B]

One, two, three.

[A]

Whoa, dude, four inches is not.

[B]

I think four inches is, like, probably right. Something like that.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. No, yeah.

[B]

No. Your mom probably got rid of that thing and crushed it in the back alleyway or something.

[A]

I didn't even tell you. I had a dream about you.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

No, it wasn't. It wasn't. It wasn't bad either. Oh, you were just in it.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Nothing crazy.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

We were in a car.

[B]

That means you're thinking about me.

[A]

I think so. Oh, well, let me tell the story.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But we were in a car, and I was in the back seat. I don't remember if there was anyone driving, but you were sitting in the passenger seat.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And then I was just going. I was trying to talk, but I couldn't. Oh, no, I'm trying to talk.

[B]

Oh, what were you trying to say?

[A]

I was trying to get your attention so you'd shake me and I'd wake up.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

So I was going, frank, I hate that point. But you wouldn't hear me.

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

Because eventually I'd get it out, but it would be so low. So then the next time I try to yell, but it would be like, oh, no.

[B]

You never fucking know. Now if I am a dream expert. Are you right now? It sounds like it.

[A]

I bet.

[B]

I think this. This sounds like there might be something that you want to talk to me about, but you may not feel right. What's up?

[A]

Oh, that. I don't know, but that sounds like a good explanation.

[B]

Has there been something on your mind? You want to air it? We'll air it out right here in front of just me and you and whoever's watching.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What is it?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

I hate that when it's just like. Or like the one. It's like you throw a punch and.

[A]

It'S like, bro, I hate that. Or like you eventually throw it. It's like, oh, this is so. It's not gonna hurt anybody.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Ah, it's like the worst feeling in the world to have that.

[B]

Oh, well, if you want to talk to me, brother, I'm all ears.

[A]

I don't really have it. I think I got it all out in the dream.

[B]

You got nothing out.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Okay. Speaking of dreams, I saw this thing. And by I, I mean ant. And it's a collection of 24 different. By the way, I couldn't even have told you 24 different ways to sleep.

[A]

Yeah, I didn't.

[B]

And, I mean, I think we know what yours is. Joey. Joey's sleeping in 10.

[A]

I do not sleep.

[B]

There's almost no doubt.

[A]

Can I guess how you sleep and you guess how I sleep?

[B]

All right. Okay.

[A]

I'm gonna guess that you sleep.

[B]

I already see mine and I know you're not gonna get it.

[A]

I think this one's a thumb. I would say 22. That's how you sleep.

[B]

No, no, Honestly, no. Close. I'm a 21. Definitely a 21.

[A]

What? It looks like you're in the middle of throwing a curveball.

[B]

Literally, it was like you're El Duque. Yeah, no, no, no. That's what I do. I bring. I bring my. My leg. All the one leg, all the way up, one down. I like to stretch it out so there difference between my legs.

[A]

I like that, too.

[B]

And then I. I pull one arm under the pillow and I bring it close to me and the other one stays, like right here or right here or right here, you know, Something. Something in this area.

[A]

Gotcha.

[B]

Who is. Who in God's name is 10 if not you?

[A]

I don't know. That is. That is like a crazy way to.

[B]

Sleep, I think, because I've watched you sleep a lot lately. I would say that you're probably. I'm kidding. I would say knowing you, you're probably. I don't hate a three. I don't hate it.

[A]

I. Three. Not all the time, but. I see a three.

[B]

I see a three. I See a three. I also see a. 17.

[A]

I was gonna say 17.

[B]

I told you.

[A]

The only thing is 10 is like.

[B]

You'Ve been through and seen some stuff.

[A]

17. I do, but I would. I think mostly I'm like a.

[B]

Like a two is pretty standard. That's. I. I would imagine. Do you have. What's your. What's your, like, fall asleep side? Because everyone has one side that they saw.

[A]

I. I sleep on my right side.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Or on my back.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

I always wake up on my back.

[B]

So, like 13. What is wrong with you?

[A]

No, I don't wake up with my hands on my But I'll tell you this. When I go on trips and I usually share a room with Espo, he fucking sleeps like that. Like he's in a coffin.

[B]

Yeah, he does. He always doesn't move.

[A]

And he's like, I think I'll go to sleep now.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm up.

[B]

I don't know who sleeps like, five, except for toddlers.

[A]

That looks like you got shot in the head. When you sleep, do you have an arm underneath the pillow?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

At all times?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Doesn't your arm fall asleep?

[B]

No.

[A]

Your arm never falls asleep.

[B]

Sometimes it does, but not all.

[A]

How do you. How do you get the blood back in your arm if it falls asleep? You just shake.

[B]

I shake it and I watch. I look at it.

[A]

Because. Look at it, bro.

[B]

Look. You feel it looking at your hand when it's asleep. My brain is just like. I know it's my hand, but I can't feel that it's there. So whose hand is this? You know? Like it. I love it a little bit when.

[A]

My arms hate it. I hang it off of the bed so that it's like I could feel the blood just like. Oh, but then you can feel it.

[B]

It's, like moving up, like, coming back to life.

[A]

Jesus, you're horny. No, it's like. It's, like, filling up my arm. And I was like, oh, and now I can move.

[B]

And now you can what? Throw an old timey punch? What the hell was that?

[A]

I'm just, like, getting the whole movement.

[B]

I could sock it to you right now.

[A]

It is weird to feel like I can't make a fist.

[B]

I love whenever. Seriously, like, whenever my hand falls asleep, I look at it and I'm just like, what is this? You know what I mean? Like, I know it's my hand, but I guess just the way that my brain works, it just. It can't compute that it's mine.

[A]

You ever try to hurt yourself? I do not what I want.

[B]

I know what you're talking about, but, like, I've had, like, my hands asleep, and I bite my hand.

[A]

Oh, I just do a pinch. I don't bite it. I'm not a rabid animal.

[B]

I do a little bite. I remember.

[A]

Would you be afraid?

[B]

No. I remember when. When we were kids, we'd be at the lake house bringing up Espo, his brother. He would. I don't know how, because. Oh, I remember how he would always sit, crisscross applesauce style and play video games. And he would sit for so long that his. One of his legs Would fall asleep. And I vividly remember this kid standing up and taking one of his legs and hitting the wall as hard as he could because his foot just had no feeling in it. It was the craziest thing.

[A]

That is weird.

[B]

Yeah, it was pretty nuts, but all right. 10.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What did you call? 16.

[A]

Kind of crazy, putting the pillow over your face. I have done that.

[B]

I know. I have done that, too. I do that only, but, like, it needs to be a pillow sandwich and needs to be cold. Pillow sandwich. I need to be the meat in this pillow. Right.

[A]

You know, I only do that if, like, it's very sunny in the room.

[B]

I also.

[A]

Do you sleep with a sleep mask?

[B]

No.

[A]

I might want to start doing that.

[B]

Give a shot. I mean, I'm sure there are companies now. They're gonna see this and be like, we need. We need Joe. We need him for sleeping.

[A]

Would you do it?

[B]

Yeah, but, like, I don't. I don't. I don't feel a specific way about it.

[A]

Do you wear pajamas? Pajamas?

[B]

Sometimes. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't.

[A]

What are your pajamas?

[B]

It really depends. Like, I have, like, pajama pants.

[A]

So you wear, like, Star wars pants?

[B]

See, you know, you're asking. This is a very leading, presumptuous question.

[A]

No, I'm asking.

[B]

No, I don't have any Star Wars.

[A]

So what do they look like?

[B]

I do have a pair of Ninja Turtles ones. I do have a pair of.

[A]

Why are you getting angry at me if this is what you.

[B]

Because the. The way that you just assumed that.

[A]

I had asked you a question, and you're like, it depends. So I'm trying to get you to.

[B]

Have the classic pajama pants. It's like the plaid.

[A]

Plaid.

[B]

You know, plaid. And then I have a pair from.

[A]

White family on Christmas. Is that yours?

[B]

Well, we have some of those around, like, Christmas and Halloween. We have, like, pajamas, like, sets for.

[A]

The time, like a shirt.

[B]

I don't sleep like a fucking. You know, like Archie Bunker.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, with, like, a button up. You know, I don't. Like, that's too much for me. But I have pajama pants. I also sleep. I don't know. Do you do this? How many pillows do you sleep with? And I'm not meaning, like, on your head. Okay. How.

[A]

So?

[B]

They're stacked, but doesn't hurt your neck, brother.

[A]

Yeah, so that's the thing. Like, I. Well, if I'm, like, sleeping on my back.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, not kind of stacked that way, but then eventually I just have, like, a. One of them. Is just by itself. And I'm laying on that when I wake up.

[B]

Okay. So I sleep with a pillow here. Then I. I do a perpendicular pillow that I. That I kind of like put my leg over and I grab. Sometimes you put your leg around it? Oh, yeah.

[A]

Do you and Becca sleep?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Opposite ways?

[B]

Yeah, pretty much. I mean, she's like, like pull that. Pull that image up one more time right there. She is a full on. Like she will sleep like I'm trying to find like eight. She is out.

[A]

Jesus.

[B]

She is out, brother. She like face down out cold when she sleeps.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I am a little more like, I like to like, I have like my whole setup.

[A]

You like a little? You have a little.

[B]

I used to sleep with like a ton of pillows.

[A]

I used to have a body pillow. Loved that.

[B]

I have a, like a king size pillow that kind of has taken that place.

[A]

Pillows come in sizes.

[B]

Yeah, of course they do.

[A]

What's a king sized pillow?

[B]

A longer pillow.

[A]

Oh, it's like this.

[B]

Yeah. Because king size beds.

[A]

Oh, I see.

[B]

So you need longer. So like a standard pillow is like this. A king size is like. Got it.

[A]

You know, you put that between your legs.

[B]

I put it between my legs and like, like. So like I have something to like wrap around, you know, Cuddly little guy. Yeah, but like I fought like, Beck and I will fall asleep holding each other. But then like once we're asleep, it's, you know, time to sleep. We turn around and we do our thing, you know, Right.

[A]

Then it's a pillows turn.

[B]

I love all these people that are just like. Like, oh, me and my couple, we cuddle all night and it's like, shut the fuck up, dude. No, you don't.

[A]

Too hot.

[B]

Not only too hot, but just like you sleep well as an individual, maybe, you know, like, I understand. Like, I'll roll over and like, I'll put my arm on Becca and like, you know, like something like that. But like the people that hold each other and fall asleep, I don't think.

[A]

Anyone really does that Besides those old people in Titanic who ended up dying.

[B]

You know who those people were?

[A]

No.

[B]

Those were the Macy's people.

[A]

Everything seemed to turn out fine for them.

[B]

Well, no, they died.

[A]

Yeah, but they're.

[B]

Yeah, but they were. They were like, you heard. Have you heard about this? So that in the movie. In the movie Titanic. Those were that movie. That moment in the movie where it's like the old man is lying on the bed with his wife and they're crying as the water's filling Up. Heartbreaking.

[A]

Can we talk about that though for a second?

[B]

Get out. Get up.

[A]

Get a shot.

[B]

Try. Get up. Get out.

[A]

The water is pouring into this room. You don't try.

[B]

Yeah, like. I know. It's like a noble thing.

[A]

Noble. You're not the captain, dude.

[B]

I know. Well that was crazy. But yeah. So that moment in the movie it was the co owners of Macy's were. Yeah.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Him and his wife Ida died on the ship when it sank in 1912. So that's what that was. Damn AC. If only they had seen what happens to their store.

[A]

Right. There's a big one.

[B]

There's. I think that was the one and then it built out from there. Wasn't the original Macy's the one in.

[A]

Is that the big ass one?

[B]

I believe so.

[A]

It's. It's a massive one.

[B]

Do they see what was the first.

[A]

Gives a shit if it's the first one. Did they ever see.

[B]

Did they ever see the parade? Bro, if they never saw their own parade. That's crazy.

[A]

The Macy's Day parade, Thanksgiving Day parade. I mean they just sponsor it. It's not like their parade.

[B]

No, dude, it's their parade.

[A]

So those are their. They blow those up.

[B]

I don't know if they are blowing them up but like they. It's their parade. Like this is your studio and I am my own individual. You don't own me pitch.

[A]

But like Citi Field isn't like cities fields like thing there that's an interchangeable thing. That's like a sponsor. You know what I mean?

[B]

That's a good point. I think different though. I'm very well versed in parades.

[A]

Are ya?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I would like to be in the fucking parade.

[B]

What are we? Absolutely not.

[A]

You don't want to be in the parade.

[B]

You want to wake up at 2am and start. Bro, they start prepping that shit in the wee hours of the morn.

[A]

We're not prep.

[B]

Well, if you're gonna be in the parade, how are you gonna be in the parade? Perform.

[A]

I just want to wave.

[B]

You got to do that like you need to get there early.

[A]

No, not 2am yes. No.

[B]

Do you think I'm an idiot?

[A]

Yes. Frank, look at me. NSync that's performing at the Macy's Day Thanksgiving parade isn't up at 2am rehearsing with the people blowing up the balloon.

[B]

It might be. Honestly, they might be as insane. They might be.

[A]

It doesn't even make sense to do that.

[B]

Why?

[A]

Cuz the parade isn't until 11.

[B]

No, the parade starts at 8am Joey.

[A]

Santa doesn't come until 12.

[B]

Yeah, he comes at the end because he's the big attraction.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

But they.

[A]

They have to do the whole thing.

[B]

I know. Is insane. Even if it's 8am, you better stop.

[A]

Six hours. You better cut it out because now you're wrong.

[B]

I know people. No, I know people that have done.

[A]

Do you know parade people?

[B]

Yes, I know people. Cuz you could volunteer 8:30am Okay, I know. First of all, crazy. That's what they use to promote it.

[A]

What the hell is even that terrifying?

[B]

Is that from outlanders? It might be, yeah.

[A]

I don't even know what that is.

[B]

Don't tell him. I.

[A]

Don'T tell him. He really wants to know.

[B]

I know people. So you can volunteer to be a person that holds the balloons.

[A]

That's so different than a performer.

[B]

If anything, that's. Those people would need to be there later than the performers.

[A]

Wait, volunteers are holding the balloons?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. That's crazy. That's a big responsibility, bro.

[B]

And they're big balloons.

[A]

What if you just as a crew.

[B]

Let go of it.

[A]

You're probably just like, yo, just on the count of 10, 10 way too many. At the count of 3, 400. We're gonna let go. Let it go. It's crazy. They're towed by trucks, are driven by.

[B]

Members of the union. But like the people that are walking, you can. You can sign up to do it.

[A]

Oh, we're. I'm an idiot.

[B]

Yeah, you are.

[A]

The. The strings are probably at this point.

[B]

Mmm.

[A]

I don't think those people are holding them down. That says to their. Towed by trucks. That makes way more sense.

[B]

So I think it's like trucks. And then there are people that are literally holding a string and they're waving.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. But I think that's more for show than anything. It's not like, you see, like, let it.

[B]

Maybe I don't know the inner workings of the balloon management at the Thanksgiving Day.

[A]

Really? You seem to know the itinerary.

[B]

I mean. Yeah. So I know people that have done it and they're like, oh, it's 3:00am I have to be on the west side of Central park because they're blowing up all the balloons now.

[A]

Yeah, him and Justin Timberlake are over there. He's warming up his vocals. He's holding the string.

[B]

I think that you are vastly misguided.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

On what the. The inner workings of a. You know what? Macy's. Why don't we host next year?

[A]

What?

[B]

The parade?

[A]

How do you even host A parade, I think.

[B]

Well, normally it's, you know, like the Good Morning America or Good Day New York people, and I do like. And now coming down the street. Oh, wow. 26 years. 26 years of memories. Pikachu is now joined by his nice little friend Evie. Crazy. I just completely misgendered Pikachu. But, like, that's who does. It's like Hoda Codby and the other lady.

[A]

Hoda and Jenna, I don't know, loves them.

[B]

Of course they talked about it.

[A]

So we did the pop tart thing, and my mama lost it.

[B]

Yeah. Remember, one of them was just like, I like the unfrosted chocolate. Psychopathy. Fired psychopath. Absolute insanity.

[A]

Well, regardless, we do have. We have sponsors right now. Okay, let's get to the first sponsors for today, the first one being seatgeek. How you doing? All right. Seatgeek is where you're gonna get all your tickets. You want to go to a Broadway play, you want to go to a Bach, you want to go to a football game, you want to go to a hockey game, any sports game. You get where I'm going with this. You can get it through SeatGeek. Okay. I've been using them for years. I love their. Their interface, I should say. You go onto their app and you can see tickets. They are color coded. So if they're dark green, that means it's a really good ticket. If it's dark red, probably should stay away from that. You're paying a little too much for your ticket there. So I like that. There's that transparency there. You can go download SeatGeek right now. We're going to save you some money on your next batch of tickets. Okay? Go to Sea Geek, download the. Download the app, and use the code BASEMENT2025 for 10 off of your next set of tickets with Sea Geek. Okay? That is 10 off any tickets with the promo code BASEMENT2025. So if you want to go to something really nice, you want to take your friends to it, you could save yourself 10%. Don't forget that code is basement 2025. So go down the app or go to the website, whatever it is. Use the. Check the code at checkout, basement 2025. Okay? And this podcast is also sponsored by Better Help. Better Help is online. Therapy is customizable. You can talk to a therapist, you know, once a week or once every other week or once a month or whatever it is you can do. So with Better Help, they have licensed therapists in, you know, all over their app. 30,000 credential therapists with a wide range of specialties so you can find the right fit for you. They make it very easy to switch from therapist to therapist so that you know you're finding the right fit, which is important. And I think that everyone should be in therapy. It's something that I've been doing for years now. I think that it's extremely helpful. And yeah, so go check it out. If you want to dive into the world of therapy, you can do so with better help. Betterhelp.com Basemyard Today you will save 10% off your first month. All right. Betterhelp.com Basementyard that is 10% off your first month when you use that code. So get to it, folks. Betterhelp.com Basemanyard 10% off. You're welcome.

[B]

And whatever journey you're on, let us come along that journey with you. And how do you do that? Well. Patreon.com the Basementyard we thank all of our all of our people that have loved and supported us and continue to push us to be better versions of ourself. Right dad. That have brought us to where we are today. And in addition, we want to thank our patrons [e-mail] the Basement Yard. If you sign up for that first tier, you get weekly episodes one week in advance. Then that second tier you get exclusive, triple exclusive if Joe's on it. Episodes. I'm kidding. Maybe we'll get ants feet on there. You never know where. Every Single Friday at 7am so you could start and end your week with the Basement Yard. We thank you guys so much for supporting us. We are really having some really cool opportunities because of everyone, not not just our patrons, but Patreon is a way to support us directly. So again, patreon.com the basementyard and folks, for any of our friends that are coming to first of all, we got back from Vancouver, had an awesome time. Penn State, you guys are really great. We had some really, really, really cool times so far this year at those shows. And we're getting ready for those Europe shows. Okay? So Scotland, London, Ireland, we're coming for you. Okay? And if you're coming to any of those shows, go to thebasementyard.com submit there's a portion of the shows that we like to be interactive. We talk with you guys. So if you go to that link, you tell us what show you're coming to. You answer some questions. There are some prompts on there. You answer some of them and then maybe if they're fun or interesting or Whatever. We'll pull them out. We'll talk to you about you, whatever. If you want to be kept anonymous, that's fine too. Or you can just not do it if you don't feel comfortable. So go check it [e-mail]. submit those shows that are there. We added a third London show. That's it. Those are the shows that we're doing over in Europe. So go check it out. If you haven't gotten those tickets that they're London show, try to grab them, snag them before. Before they go away. All right. We're really excited to see you guys, and. Yeah, let's. Let's rock and roll, baby.

[A]

Let's rock and roll.

[B]

I wanted to check in on you because, well, you had your dream where it sounds like something that you wanted to say, get off your chest. But you can't, again, save space. You can tell me and talk to me about anything. I did want to check in with you and ask if you're okay, though, because I know this has been a pretty tough time.

[A]

What's the joke?

[B]

There's no joke, dude. I know you openly speak about how just from top to bottom experience the moment you walk in and out, Hooters has been one of your favorite establishments ever. And that's the joke.

[A]

First of all, you've been in Hooters way more times than I have.

[B]

I just. I'm. Well, first of all, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Hooters, Hooters. No, I'm not.

[A]

You love Hooters.

[B]

I. First of all, love is strong word.

[A]

You're one of those guys who walks into it. You're like, give me the atomic ones.

[B]

Yep. Yeah, I was. Absolutely. I was. I mean, hot sauce is hot sauce. You get hot sauce wherever you go. It depends, you know?

[A]

You were trying to impress the Hooter girls.

[B]

You think? Hold on. Yes. Okay, whatever you're about to say, yes, I'm gonna withdraw. What? I was gonna say.

[A]

That's why you wore your finest double XL football T shirt.

[B]

I could understand.

[A]

Football T shirt.

[B]

Yeah. You're an idiot.

[A]

Kick me in the front teeth.

[B]

Hard to miss the.

[A]

You're running with this thing.

[B]

I don't know why. You have great teeth.

[A]

Can I say that's crazy? Can we say something? I didn't even know they served shrimp at Hooters.

[B]

If anyone has ever gotten anything other than chicken wings at Hooters. Crazy, right?

[A]

Shrimp. What?

[B]

I don't think I've ever gotten anything other than chicken wings. Like, forget about even Burgers. Like, it's crazy to me who goes to Hooters? And it's just like, let me get a burger.

[A]

Yeah, no, you got to get the wings.

[B]

Well, right now it doesn't look like you're going to be able to get anything, because I wanted to check in because apparently they filed for bankruptcy. Are you okay?

[A]

I'm good. What does. What does.

[B]

I just realized that the O's are owl eyes. Oh.

[A]

I was going to say look like boobs.

[B]

Oh, well, maybe that, too. But also, they're the eyes of the owl.

[A]

Right. No, that I knew.

[B]

Hooters mascot.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's not the women being objectified for your money. It's an owl brother.

[A]

No, no, no. That's of course what they're doing.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, we know that.

[A]

Do you remember when we were younger, I was like, oh, no, it's fine now. Like, this was progression back in the day, it was like, no, it's fine. We don't. You don't even need big tits to work here anymore.

[B]

Yeah, good for you. That's right. They were just like. We're now allowing anyone to apply any. Any hot girl, massive tits, big tits, just like regular tits.

[A]

As long as you're willing to wear the underwear that's riding in your ass, we don't care how big your tits are.

[B]

Also, I think at a time. Didn't they. And this is funny that I know this, but, like, I think that they, like, it was the women that work there wore short shorts.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And then they added, like, leggings to it. Oh, like brown leggings.

[A]

Well, like. Yeah, they were like, nude.

[B]

Like, nude colored leggings or something.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, I don't know that I've been there. And it was like, raw leg.

[B]

I'm sure we have at the time. You think in 2008, they were that progressive where they were just like, you know what, ladies?

[A]

Put some legs.

[B]

Hooters is going to throw you a bone here.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I mean, I don't want to speak ill of the establishment. Hooters, we don't know.

[A]

It's because you love it.

[B]

No, no.

[A]

You love Hooters.

[B]

I'm just saying we are so far one for one with successfully reviving a popular restaurant.

[A]

One for one for taking credit. For sure.

[B]

I mean, if it's the American way, that's the way I'm gonna do it. That's taking credit for something you talk about once on a podcast.

[A]

What does bankruptcy really mean?

[B]

It means they start liquidating their assets and figuring out ways to stop losing as much money as they are spending.

[A]

I know, but that doesn't mean that, like, they're going away.

[B]

I know. So there's different types. There's different, like, filing. There's different chapters. I believe I remember looking this up when I was looking up chapter 11. Chapter 11 is just, like, we are not, like, going away completely, but, like, we're gonna start restructuring, pay all our bills. Well, bro, look at Red Lobster. They're doing well. They're kind of a success story thanks to us.

[A]

Not their new CEO. Not that.

[B]

Yeah, not the progressive new CEO that's, like, trying to find ways to, like. So chapter seven. Discharge in chapter seven releases debt debtors from their personal debts. Whatever. What's 11? Why do they not have the most coolest type 11?

[A]

Oh, it's a repayment plan. So a seven is. Is like, wait, yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Whatever, dude. Bankruptcy.

[B]

Yeah. So do we. Do we commit to helping Hooters or, like.

[A]

You'd love that. Let's go get atomic wings. No, it's not even spicy.

[B]

Listen, my time at Hooters is long gone. I haven't been to one since, like, 2016.

[A]

Not that long ago.

[B]

I mean, maybe. Honestly, probably before that. Maybe, like, 20 now that we left. Yeah, yeah, yeah, 2014. Those two years are massive for me.

[A]

I think the last time that I went, I was with you. I've only been to Hooters, like, twice.

[B]

I've been several times, and I think I've told this because my fraternity used to do an event at Hooters, right? It was all, you can eat wings, and it was like, if you think of rushing, come hang out with a bunch of guys. Wings eating at Hooters.

[A]

Did you go to, like, ever? Like, I guess that's a stupid question. Was it ever, like, a hangout spot? Like, would you. Did they have TVs?

[B]

I think they did, yeah. I. I don't remember. It's possible I have, like, just being like, yo, bros, what are we doing tonight? You want to go crush some wings at Hooters and watch the game?

[A]

If you had to go eat wings somewhere, where would it be?

[B]

I'm. You're gonna make fun of me for this? Potentially. You've never been Buffalo Wild Wings? I. A lot of people talk shit about their wings, myself included. Their wings are, like, not the worst I've ever had in my entire life.

[A]

And you're a flat or a drum?

[B]

I prefer a flat over a drum.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, me too. It's. It's Just Buffalo wild wings. And, like, it's not awful. Like, it's not the worst wings I've ever had in my entire life.

[A]

They're usually very big places, right? Buffalo wild wings.

[B]

Well, yeah, because they do what? It's like, you know, it's like bro culture. It's like, there's wings, there's beer, there's sports. We don't have the tits like Hooters, but come on in anyway.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

That's their whole thing.

[A]

You know what gets me every time?

[B]

Tits.

[A]

No. Well, but a beer tower.

[B]

I am a slut for a beer tower.

[A]

Dude, if you put beer in a.

[B]

Cylindrical shape, it doesn't matter how much it costs.

[A]

I'm finishing it. This is a challenge.

[B]

Yeah, I. Bro, there was like, that. That. It was like 2012 to, like, 2015. Every place was just like. We had beer towers now.

[A]

Got me.

[B]

I was in.

[A]

I'm in there.

[B]

I was super in. I didn't hate them.

[A]

I haven't been to a place that's offered a beer tower since we. I think you were with me when we were in Vegas and got it. Were you there?

[B]

Yes, I was. Yeah. When we went to the pizza. The pizza place.

[A]

The pizza place.

[B]

We got, like. And they were like, 30 bucks. It was like. It was like, you can get a beer for 8 bucks or you can get 10 for 30.

[A]

Do you think people do beer towers at weddings but fill it with, like, champagne?

[B]

Dude, that's genius. That's a centerpiece.

[A]

Champagne towers.

[B]

I like this. I like this. I'm gonna get married all over again.

[A]

Let's get champagne tires. In the middle of everything where we.

[B]

Were supposed to get married, they had built into the walls. They had beer taps. That sounds pretty cool, too. I will say, this is cooler when you can see your beer. Yeah, I like beer. Like, that. I could see.

[A]

I like when it's, like, labeled. It's like at the top, it's like.

[B]

Oh, you're kind of up. You're super up.

[A]

Where's my keys?

[B]

Where's my keys?

[A]

Is not my brother.

[B]

I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I meant to say, like, where I take my keys. Although that should be way higher to the top two. No, we had, like. We had. My brothers had that mug from, like, Spencer's, and it was like a giant mug that held, like, eight beers. Or, no, not. But maybe like, four beers. And it was just like. I know you're gonna tell. We'll get to that soon. And the first one was just like, you're a novice. Keep drinking Whoa, look at the dress on you. Really just really being fucked up to people that decide they want to wear dresses from other genders. Genders associated. It's all over the place. And then the last one was just like, sorry, drunk, I'm not an officer or something like, dude, there was just. Go ahead, go ahead.

[A]

Maybe two summers.

[B]

Two.

[A]

Four.

[B]

Four.

[A]

I don't know how many.

[B]

Try like 10.

[A]

10 summers where Frank refused. Refused to drink beer unless it was in a boot.

[B]

Yes. Yeah.

[A]

And you. And. Or you'd wear the helmet.

[B]

The helmet.

[A]

You loved gadgets.

[B]

I had. But I had a lot. It was a thing for birthday. My. My sister would get me a beer gadget. I had a ton of them.

[A]

You had so many gadgets.

[B]

But I had. I had the hat that. With the two straws. That came out in concept a great idea in execution piss poor. Because then I. I had to like, like I couldn't like I had to turn around very slow, you know, drink.

[A]

Out of a boot all night.

[B]

And so I saw Beer Fest and I was like, this is my whole personality.

[A]

This is the coolest thing I've ever seen.

[B]

The coolest thing I've ever seen. So someone I don't even remember and I know my. I really pray that my father. I don't know why I pray that he still has it.

[A]

You pray that he has your boot? Dear, dear God, please, please tell me.

[B]

Daddy has my boot.

[A]

Anything.

[B]

Anything. I'll do anything for my glass beer drinker.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yeah, but I. And it held three. Three cans of beer. And it was legit. Like the whole turn it thing was legit because if not the bubble would smack you in the face.

[A]

Dude. Just insane. Insane. It was crazy.

[B]

You want me to get. You wanted me to get started. We lived in the prime time of like Spencer's Gifts drinking paraphernalia. We had the Bongzilla.

[A]

The beer pong table.

[B]

We had the beer pong table. That not only lasted forever, we brought it with us to several dozen places.

[A]

May be still leaning against your house in Connecticut.

[B]

It might. I honestly knowing my dad, he. If it's there, he's kept it.

[A]

Also knowing me, it's probably covered with my urine because I've peed next to your house a billion.

[B]

Oh yeah. That. How I will say this thing was built basically out of cardboard. I don't know how. If it's still around, there's no way it opens up and operates. Yeah, no, that thing was something else, man. It was like the professional beer pong eight foot table.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

In the middle it had like the.

[A]

Yeah, there was a guy like this. And you're like, all right. It's like the NBA.

[B]

Good times. Good times.

[A]

Better than a couple of drinks.

[B]

You know what games. Let's do an episode where we get two beer towers, Frank. And we do a beer tower race. It holds like six beers. Joey. We will be okay, Frank. Maybe not in a full episode. Maybe that's more of a Santa got a studios thing. Greg, do me a favor. Can you expense two beer towers for me, please?

[A]

Frank? Can I say. Can I say something? Can I say something? And I want to be. This is. This is big. I'm breaking down the wall right here. Okay.

[B]

Break the walls down.

[A]

Don't interrupt me real quick. I just want to get this off. Frank.

[B]

You want to get off?

[A]

Yeah. You just did it. Frank is not an idea guy, admittedly. Right.

[B]

Yeah. Fully admit.

[A]

Most of the time I will say that his ideas are next level bad. Right. Just unbelievably horrible.

[B]

Like what?

[A]

That beer tower idea may have erased your entire past. That is an incredible idea. Get two beer towers in here and we should just crush them. That would be amazing. I would love that.

[B]

Jokes aside.

[A]

And we have to write stuff on.

[B]

We have to write stuff like. This is the levels. Look up the drinking beer levels. Look up, look them up. We should have like look up drinking glass, big drinking glass that has levels that are insulting.

[A]

Hey, man, just look up beer tower.

[B]

That are insulting because they're like, like almost like borderline homophobic like the old ones. It'll just be like you swallow, I.

[A]

Think go to Amazon and type in beer tower.

[B]

I mean, no, no beer tower we could get. That's easy.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

What we have to.

[A]

Frank wants to be degraded, apparently. Drink your beer, you whore.

[B]

Yeah. Oh, what is this? They think he's alien.

[A]

Yeah, well, while we're doing that, we're gonna. We have some more sponsors for. For this week.

[B]

I'm so excited. I'm sorry. I'm so excited you said that. I had a good idea.

[A]

Interruption. Okay, we have. We have Squarespace. Squarespace is where you're going to build your website. Okay. They're a platform that they're going to offer all the tools you need to build and operate a successful website. I've said it before. Your website is sometimes your first impression. So it is very important. If you have a great product but your website is eh, then people are kind of going to be a little, you know, iffy about purchasing or whatever it is. But yeah, with, with Squarespace, they have a bunch of templates that will help you get, you know, jump started in building a great looking website. All you have to do is switch out the text and some photos and stuff and then you have your amazing looking website with Squarespace. And not only that, but they also have a lot of tools that will help you optimize your traffic. It'll let you know where the traffic is coming from and you know, with that you can allocate your marketing funds or whatever it is. So it's a very helpful tool. And yeah, you can go to squarespace.com basement and you will save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using the code basement. Okay, that is squarespace.com basement and you will save 10% off of your first purchase of a website or a domain using that code basement. So a lot of people have used Squarespace and they reached out and they were like, hey, love this stuff. So for those out there who want a website or you need, you know, you want to build something, you got an E commerce business, you got to do a Squarespace. That's the only one that we use. Okay. We also have ZocDoc. ZocDoc is a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in network doctors and click instantly to book an appointment. This is true before zocdoc was even a sponsor on this. I used them because I had no idea how to even book a doctor. After I was off of my parents insurance I was like, I have my own insurance but I don't know who takes it or whatever it is. That's very confusing. At least here in New York it is. So I looked online and I found zocdoc. You put in your insurance, you put in like what kind of care you need, whether it be a primary care physician or a specialist or anything like that. Then you hit search. It'll show you the ones in your area and their next available appointments. And like I said, they are patient reviewed. So a score out of five. You know, these people are not paying for those reviews. It is patients who had a good experience. So you can read the reviews and say, okay, this person is a good doctor, they have availability tomorrow or even today at some point. So that's zocdoc. So it's great. It's a free app and website where you can, where you can do that. So yeah, so stop putting off all those doctor's appointments. Go to zocdoc.com basement to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That is Zocdoc.com Basement Z O C D O C.com Basement and lastly, here we have Kickoff. Okay, Kickoff is going to help you build your credit. You could start bidding your credit immediately with for only $1 for your first month with autopay. You never have to worry about missing a payment. You could build your credit in your sleep. But for people that may have accidentally missed a payment or something like that in the past and you really messed up your credit, this is a good way to try and help build your credit. There's no credit check involved. You can sign up in minutes from your phone, cancel anytime. It's the number one credit building app out there. It has over a hundred thousand positive reviews on the App store and 98% of them are five stars. So people are loving Kickoff. But yeah, so go check out Kickoff if you want to help build your credit up. Or maybe it's just not where it could be and you want to take it to the next level. Go check out Kickoff. Offer applies to new customers first month only subject to approval. Offer subject to change terms and conditions may apply. Points that based on Equifax Vantage Score 3.0 changes for kickoff users starting under 600 who made their first on time payment between January 2021 and March 2024. Payment and credit activity outside Kickoff can have an impact on your credit. Individual results may vary. But go to getkickoff.com basement today. That is getkickoff.com basement. Okay. G-E-T-K-I K-O-F-F.com basement so it's kickoff without the C. All right, Enjoy. Wow. Okay. Get the beer towers. That's gonna. What's going on over there?

[B]

Serious talk now. Oh, first of all, can you just look up big beer mug with comical things written on it?

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Just right. Look at that real quick.

[A]

You're so adamant about being degraded by your beer mugs.

[B]

But also it's. It's time to talk about something serious.

[A]

Go ahead.

[B]

There.

[A]

No, we don't have to do this now, Frank.

[B]

We'll do it eventually.

[A]

What do you say?

[B]

I always. What's it? Titties and beer to the right. I don't always. To the left. Down to the left.

[A]

Left. Yeah. No, we have a show.

[B]

That one. What's it say? I don't always think about titties and beers. Oh, wait, yes, I do.

[A]

Are you satisfied now? You're satisfied.

[B]

No, it's time to talk about something serious. So you guys have asked, we have listened.

[A]

You're talking about me.

[B]

The beef boys are back. Joey and Frankie, the beef boys are back. A lot of people often love our coverage of beef, how you're all over beef anytime there's beef.

[A]

We both just ate a beef stick.

[B]

Separate beef sticks. Let's make that very clear.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

And they came out of a box.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. Joe's beef stick. You. You ate yours in the bathroom for some reason.

[A]

I will say I don't even get that joke. Oh, you thought I was shoving a beef stick in my ass. Got it.

[B]

Okay, the beef boys are back. And this one hits close to home now, Joe. So look at some of the other beefs that we've covered. We've been all over the. The. The. The. The Hailey Bieber Selena Gomez beef.

[A]

I remember that.

[B]

You remember that beef? The Rizzler and Baby Gronk.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Quite. Quite the. Quite the thing going on there.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Now we've got Boy Meets World Beef.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Beef. Boys Meets Boy Meets World Beef.

[A]

I see what you're doing. Okay.

[B]

Have you heard about this?

[A]

I. I heard there a. Topanga is, like, upset about something or some shit. I don't really know what it is. No.

[B]

All right, so in summary, basically, so.

[A]

So summarize.

[B]

That's what I was going to do. Do it. I was gonna do it. Okay, so if you had a popular, like. Like, kids show or Disney show or whatever in, like, the, like the 90s or early 2000s, like, a lot of them have podcasts now. Remember, there was, like, Ned's Declassified. Chrissy Carlson Romano has one. She's got shot in the face now. There's. What you hear about that. She was on. It's. I'm glad she's okay. She was on a.

[A]

She got shot in the face.

[B]

She was on a hunting trip and she got shot in the face. She's okay.

[A]

With a gun in the face.

[B]

Like a. Like a shooting gun. Like, they're all shooting guns. Like. No, like a hunting one. The ones that, like, spray. The one that, like, Dick Cheney got. He shot someone.

[A]

Oh, like a. Like a. Like pellets.

[B]

Pellets? Yeah, yeah, they hung whale still. Yeah. Dude, it was scary. She posted a picture. I was like, holy shit. She all right. She seems okay. She posted a picture saying, like, I'm good.

[A]

Okay. You tried to glaze over someone getting shot in the face.

[B]

You can't say glaze and then shot in the face. Joey, that's really out of left.

[A]

You can. If you don't, you do.

[B]

That's really out of left field. But so there's a Boy Meets World podcast and it's the. The. The. The three of the heaviest hitters on the show. You got Topanga, you got Hunter. What was his name? Will Hunter.

[A]

Ben Savage. Nope.

[B]

No, that's. That's Corey. His name is Ben something. Hunter. Hunter.

[A]

Hunter, Hunter.

[B]

You know who I'm talking about? The guy that was in Cabin.

[A]

Cool hair.

[B]

Yeah. The one whose dad didn't love him.

[A]

He's like, I'm poor, but I wear leather jackets.

[B]

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Very expensive leather jacket. Yeah, I had. And then.

[A]

And then he's like. He got adopted by the teacher who drives a Harley.

[B]

Sean Hunter. There we go. Rider Strong. Great name.

[A]

That's a sick name.

[B]

And then Will Friedel. Friedel. Friedel. Forgive me if I'm butchering the.

[A]

Oh, and the older brother.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. So they have a podcast where they just talk, you know, like, life, happiness, joy. I love it. I'm all about it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Another one of the stars from. I don't know about stars. A woman that was on the show with them. They had her on and her and Topanga just started beefing. Dude, who.

[A]

Who was on? Which one?

[B]

Her name is. There it is. Maitland Ward. I don't remember who she played in the show.

[A]

Scroll down.

[B]

She was.

[A]

Oh, the redhead.

[B]

The redheaded actress. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Who was with the other guy?

[B]

I don't remember who she's with.

[A]

The guy who looks like he's, you know, this. The other guy who's his. The. The brother's roommate.

[B]

I don't remember that. Who, Who. But so she gets on and she's just like. They start going back and forth. Why? So the story is that Maitland Ward was like upset. She thought that the other people from the show were upset cuz she was getting a lot of attention. And Topanga's like, yo, let's. Let's like verbally brawl right now. Let me say something.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

There are a few things in life that are just American and beloved to their core. Okay. I'm not a fan, but.

[A]

Apple pie.

[B]

Apple pie. Okay.

[A]

Bald eagles.

[B]

Bald eagles.

[A]

Sparklers.

[B]

Spark fireworks. I mean, I think we got them from the Chinese, but we did. All right, sparklers. Maybe they're ours now.

[A]

I meant like these sparklers. Not the club sparklers.

[B]

You're not the ones that come out with bottles, you know? And this has a sign that says, like, you're 32. Oldie.

[A]

Yeah, you know, oldie. Okay.

[B]

Other things. And anything.

[A]

Anything American that you can think of.

[B]

A really dumb looking USA hat.

[A]

Okay, he's wearing one. Hot dogs.

[B]

Hot dogs. How do we glaze over hot dogs?

[A]

Here's a question. Clowns. Is that an American thing?

[B]

I think the. I think.

[A]

Did we invent clowns?

[B]

No, no, no, no. Mimes. France. Those are the first. Those aren't clowns, are they?

[A]

Who invented mines Aren't clowns. Those are very different.

[B]

Who invented clowns?

[A]

I think that we.

[B]

Ancient Rome, ancient Egypt, and other cultures.

[A]

Those are jesters. Nope, that's a clown.

[B]

Yeah, brother. Full on clown. Damn few things that are just, to their core, American and beloved.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

Topanga. Really?

[A]

You think Topanga, bro. I love Topanga.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

One of my first crushes.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Did you have a crush on Topanga? Of course. Who didn't Had a crush on Topanga?

[B]

She's beautiful, you know, like it was at the time.

[A]

And she's so mature.

[B]

She was always, like. She was always, like. She always had her head on straight, you know, Like, Cory was being an idiot.

[A]

Yeah. He was such a bastard.

[B]

He was such a little.

[A]

He was a.

[B]

He was.

[A]

He was a.

[B]

He was. He was. I.

[A]

She was there to be like, dude.

[B]

And Sean's in the corner with a leather jacket. Like, also a little hates me.

[A]

Yeah, he was. Well, he doesn't even know. I don't think he knows his dad or whatever.

[B]

Well, if your dad doesn't know you, chances are they hate you.

[A]

Yeah, he had a lot of more stuff going on. Corey was a. Because he had a loving family, a great house.

[B]

Great house.

[A]

And a lovely lady. What are you complaining about?

[B]

What's there to complain about?

[A]

Your best friend's basically homeless dude. Yeah, he was a little bit of a too, but he has more stuff to complain about.

[B]

It's just. It's just, you know, Topanga, you don't go after Topanga. That's the rule.

[A]

I agree.

[B]

That is the rule of life.

[A]

It's also a fun name to say.

[B]

Topanga, Topanga, Topanga. If you go after Topanga, this boy.

[A]

He's pointing at himself.

[B]

Is gonna make sure you meet the afterworld.

[A]

Just kill. Yeah, okay, I got it.

[B]

You don't attack Topanga, dude.

[A]

What did she say?

[B]

She said, like, you know, like, oh, like, why don't we talk? So Topanga was just like, yo, being Topanga, she's like, let's talk offline so we can squash any beef. Right, Topanga?

[A]

That's maturity.

[B]

Very maturity.

[A]

Yeah, Mr. Feeny would be proud.

[B]

Very maturity. And Maitland War was like, nah, save it for the. I'm coming to the podcast and we'll talk there.

[A]

Oh, she wanted to air it out.

[B]

She wanted to air it out.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It'll be good for ratings. And Topanga dropped one of the coldest lines I've ever heard. Dude.

[A]

Oh, fuck.

[B]

So Maitland was just like, yo, you were upset because I was getting all this attention in 2014. And Topanga goes. I was on the COVID of Maxim in 2014.

[A]

Damn. That's crazy. But can we say this? No, she wasn't wrong. It did do good for ratings we're talking about.

[B]

That's right. That is it. That is.

[A]

Maitland knows what she's talking about. Maybe cut her in on that deal.

[B]

That is right. She's not incorrect. But you don't go after Topanga.

[A]

Yeah, that's just like, we're. Maybe they should fight on the undercard of a Jake Paul fight that no one wants to watch. I'm just kidding, dude.

[B]

Topanga is very maturity. So, like, I feel like she's probably taken boxing or like Taebo or something like that.

[A]

What is Taebo?

[B]

I think it's a fun mix of working out and dancing.

[A]

Taebo.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So what's tai or taii is energy movements.

[B]

Yep, yep, yep.

[A]

This kind of thing.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Also, isn't this so weird that growing up, everyone had that one dude in the neighborhood who would randomly. You'd be like, is that the guy doing tai chi over there?

[B]

They'd be at the park and they would just be like, yeah, I, I.

[A]

Don't you guys have a tai chi guy? We did. We did.

[B]

Everyone had a tai chi guy.

[A]

Is it tai chi or is it.

[B]

We also want to be careful that we're not offending anyone that may or may not practice Tai chi, Tai bo, or any Thai.

[A]

I'm not offending tai chi at all. I think it's awesome.

[B]

Kwondo or anything. They might us up.

[A]

Might. How hard would that be?

[B]

Everyone knew that one tai chi guy that was just like, now try to push me. You know what I mean? I love those videos on the Internet. Yeah.

[A]

Of guys being like, oh, my.

[B]

They'll be like, standing still. They'll just be like, flat footed. They're like, try to push me. And you push them and be like, see, I have completely centered my. My chi. And like, I am immovable right now.

[A]

I love the videos of the guy who's like, clearly, he's.

[B]

He's the guy.

[A]

And then there's a people just sitting down. They're watching him and he's like, it's just like this. And he's like, hold like, he'll just be like, see, that's all you have to do. It's about energy. It's about balance. You just knocking some guy over and they're all just like, yeah.

[B]

And so bro, how can you sit.

[A]

There and watch that?

[B]

And out loud, yo, have you ever seen like the Steven Seagal like him performing in like North Korea or Russia? Someone will come at him and he'll just like grab their wrist and be like, watch this. Yeah.

[A]

Like what are we doing?

[B]

And like in slow mo. I agree. I, I, those are, it's like we're like sharks where people like, you know how they've, you ever seen people hypnotize sharks where they do that? Where they're just like. Sharks are big puppies. Watch this. And there's a great ride. And they like put their hand on its nose and flips it upside down and like scratches its belly. And apparently that's real. Apparently it is real. Yeah, but, yeah, but I would love to see. I'm riding a wave right now. So.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Do I quit while I'm ahead?

[A]

I don't know what you're saying.

[B]

For a Santa Gato Studios video.

[A]

Here we go.

[B]

We get someone like, like a Tai chi master in here to do those moves on us. Cuz I also know someone.

[A]

I'd be so embarrassed.

[B]

I also know someone that was, went to school for massage therapy and they were just like, oh yeah, no, like there are parts of your body that if I touch, you'll like your pants, dude. I, I'm not kidding. This is what this person told me. I've not asked them to like go for it.

[A]

I'm, I'm, I'm open to that. Being real. Make me shit my pants. I would need to experience that. Like you're telling me someone could just touch this thing and I would just fill my pants?

[B]

Fill your shitty pants.

[A]

I would. That would be unbelievable.

[B]

And you've been wearing bigger, more looser pants now, so you could probably feel a lot of crap.

[A]

More crap.

[B]

A lot more crap.

[A]

Not only that, but I would argue that's cooler than like a card trick.

[B]

Well, yeah, because one is make it's being done to your body, bro.

[A]

Vegas. This is a great thing. Get like an ex Navy SEAL and just have them be like, come up to the crowd. I need, I need a volunteer and just make them their pants. That would be so awesome. Can you imagine that?

[B]

I think it's possible. And I'll go one step probable.

[A]

If we had a guy in here was like, if I Touch a part of your neck, you will. Your pants. You let him touch it.

[B]

Not me. Not me. No, no, no. Really, I don't need.

[A]

What if I got you pants?

[B]

I don't care what you get me. It's not. First of all, there's no shower in here. Okay?

[A]

But all those questions are answered.

[B]

You could get me whatever you want. What it would do to my, like, confidence to shoot your pants? Yeah, brother. I don't think I'd come back from that.

[A]

Why?

[B]

An adult man, his pants on the Internet is. Is.

[A]

We don't have to post it.

[B]

I'll just talk about it worse.

[A]

Would you. Would you let him make you shit your pants? Sure. But he would have to teach me how to do it, at least. He can't just never reveal their secrets.

[B]

Their secrets. That's right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think that's the thing. Because you love talking about how often you almost crap yourself.

[A]

No, I talk about me doing that all the time.

[B]

Because offline, you talk about it.

[A]

No, I don't.

[B]

Yes, you do. How often does he talk about almost crapping his.

[A]

Frank, You're a manipulator, and you. You tell lies on the show, and you create narratives, and then people just believe them because you create narratives and you make it up in your. You know what, Gaslighter?

[B]

Get Topanga on my side. Topanga. You hear how he's talking about us? You hear how he's talking about us?

[A]

Oh, is that.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

Is that Topanga? Now?

[B]

I believe she's had, like, a WWE event recently.

[A]

Look at that shirt. That's a Frank shirt, baby. That looks like a six shirt.

[B]

I'm sorry.

[A]

That's a sick shirt. I like that shirt.

[B]

That is. That's the redhead.

[A]

Wow. That doesn't look like I remember at all.

[B]

I honestly don't even remember her from the show. If I hadn't looked up this article.

[A]

Yeah, she was always with the. The brother and the roommate and then her, and it was like this weird love triangle kind of.

[B]

Do we have to go back and watch all of Boy Meets World?

[A]

No.

[B]

Oh, we don't.

[A]

All right. We don't have to do that. Honestly, what episode stands out when you think about Boy Meets World? What stands out?

[B]

Ask me again. You tell your answer that I'm gonna drink this water because there's something caught in my throat.

[A]

Got it. Two answers. One, there was a Halloween episode that scared the shit out of me, and I remember seeing that. Specifically, where the lights go off, the lights turn on. The guy's got a pencil through his Head, and he slides down the wall and he goes. I'll always remember. He was this tall. And I was terrified.

[B]

Anytime, like, a show is like. Like, kids shows did a Halloween episode, that's when they were like, we're gonna scare the shit out of the kids that are watching this.

[A]

Crazy.

[B]

I think Keenan and Kel did one that petrified me as a child.

[A]

I was scared of everything.

[B]

I recently rewatched. Oh, man. I. I tweeted about this, but I recently was like. It was up one morning, and it was just miles, and I up, and I was like, yo, you want to, like, watch? Are you afraid of the dark?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And he was like, yeah.

[A]

In the morning.

[B]

In the morning. And he was like, yeah, night's too crazy, because I. I loaded this. I loaded it up. I was just like, dude, this show, like, a. A kid. It scared the. Out of me. Like, it was really terrifying. There was one episode in particular, Tale of the Ghastly Grinner. I've spoken about it, and I was like, yo, you want to watch it? He's like, yeah. I was like, it might scare you. He's like, I'm good, dude. I'm fine with it. Like, let's put it on.

[A]

And a. Like, you, Kiki.

[B]

And we watched it, and boy, oh, boy, did it make me look like a little baby. Because it was not scary at all, really. But come on. You could see why as a little kid, I was terrified of it.

[A]

Yeah. I didn't fuck with that at all.

[B]

You know what I'm saying? And he was just like, you thought you found this scary.

[A]

Damn.

[B]

Yeah, he hit me hard.

[A]

Then you gotta show him, like, insidious.

[B]

Or Now I was thinking, now, next, I'm gonna have to show him something crazy, but Becca might be a little upset about that one.

[A]

What, like a something? Really? If you had to show someone. What's the scariest movie you ever seen?

[B]

The Strangers.

[A]

Is that the one where they knock on the door?

[B]

Yeah. Where it's just like, why us? It was like you were home terrifying.

[A]

That's why.

[B]

That's what they say.

[A]

Well, that's why you're barricading all those doors. Yeah. I don't like home invasions. I don't like that at all.

[B]

Who does?

[A]

I don't like haunted shit, though. That's like. I can get past that, the strangers concept once you're getting into, like, haunting, like, I don't know why.

[B]

See, I'm the opposite. I. Things that are real freak me out way more. Things that are, like, supernatural.

[A]

Yeah. But Like, I. I agree, but I. I just feel differently about, like, haunting and, like, religious because I'm like, oh, I don't. I don't know.

[B]

I mean, yeah, I mean, you all. You were also raised more religious than I was, so, like, I can understand. Becca's like that, though.

[A]

But that's not why. It's like, there's. There's accounts of exorcisms. Like, there's people who do them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it's like, what is that? Like, what's going on with this person that they think there's a demon?

[B]

Becca's like, you in that regard. Like, Like a. A sci fi or like a, Like a. Like a. A horror movie about, like, just like a person that's scary. Okay. With the moment. It's like supernatural or, like, religious or, like, demonic. She's just like, I'm out.

[A]

I. I'll watch them. The only thing that gets me out of movies is jump scares. I hate.

[B]

You do. You've said this before. You do the whole, like, who's texting me right now?

[A]

I do that all the time. Or I get something in my eye for like 10 minutes, I'm like, no, I love.

[B]

I love horror movies. Love them.

[A]

You like being scared?

[B]

I do almost.

[A]

I like it like someone going like, hey.

[B]

And you're like, oh, one of my favorite tiktoks is like that. It's like a compilation of people scaring other people. Like, they're like, there's like this kid that, like, scares his grandmother, and he just, like, runs up there and he's like. And she, like, fucking, like, freaks out.

[A]

I'm terrified of scaring old people. I feel like you could.

[B]

Yeah, they're. They're one step in. Yeah, dude, they're one. One foot in, one foot out. You know what I'm saying?

[A]

I feel like when you scare someone, like that feeling in your chest, your heart has to, like, do something.

[B]

When I was. When I was a kid, my sister scared me once so bad that I started crying.

[A]

Yeah, dude, are you kidding me? I used to cry all the time for stuff. Yeah. Being scared, that was the least of it. I've cried for numerous reasons, dude. I love a good 90 of the time. It was girls.

[B]

Yeah, we know that you cried about girls, too. What up? I did.

[A]

Remember when you. You cried.

[B]

Oh, don't.

[A]

You cried on a. On a piece of paper and you circled it and you're like, oh, there was a tear.

[B]

No, it wasn't a real cry.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, wait. Yeah. No, you. You just Licked it.

[B]

Yeah. First time I remember crying for a girl was when I told the girl in second grade that I loved her. No, I loved her, liked her. And it was the day after I watched the making of the video Cisco Thong song. Full circle.

[A]

Wait, what?

[B]

Full circle.

[A]

It was the day after.

[B]

Yep, full circle.

[A]

That's how it. How zoned in you were on Cisco that you remember the next day.

[B]

Yeah, it was. I mean, it was a traumatic time.

[A]

Wait, what was that? Second grade? Yeah, same year you stopped talking to me Because Kelsey said I was her friend.

[B]

Best friend. You know?

[A]

You know that this girl Kelsey, she gave me a thing on Valentine's Day. Like, when you're a kid, like, everyone gives stuff out to each other in class. She gave me this thing and Frankie was just standing next to me. Or I had like a bunch and I was just like, going through. And one of them said, kelsey, it's like from your best friend Kelsey. And then he went, what? And I looked at him, he looked at me like I stabbed him. And he was like, I thought I was your best friend.

[B]

Listen.

[A]

I was like, you are. She wrote that. I didn't write that. He was like, listen, Weeks, bro. Two weeks. Wait, it was about you being the best friend. Yeah, I thought it was about Kelsey. Like, he liked Kelsey.

[B]

Listen. No, we've established that I am a dominant Leo and one of my traits is that I am loyal. I'm right or fucking die.

[A]

That's not loyalty.

[B]

That is loyalty, bitch.

[A]

How is that loyal?

[B]

Because you were being disloyal.

[A]

I wasn't being disloyal.

[B]

Your best friend cheated on me. You best friend cheated.

[A]

She said I was her best friend.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That doesn't mean.

[B]

Why would she say that? Why would she assume that, that that relationship is there?

[A]

Can I be honest with you?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I have no idea. Do you remember me and Kelsey being best friends?

[B]

I think.

[A]

I think I did have a crush on her, though.

[B]

She moved away.

[A]

She moved away.

[B]

So she might have been. This might have been the basement yard with Kelsey and Joe, but it isn't now. I won, bro.

[A]

Do you remember. Do you remember when Kelsey moved away? It was. She could have.

[B]

I remember the next year, it was.

[A]

Basically, she went to Japan. Dude, she moved 15 minutes.

[B]

And I remember the next year, at the end of the school year, she came back. Remember the end. The last, like, three weeks of school in elementary school were just like, toss ups. No one gave a. What you did.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, what are we doing today? We're watching a movie and eating gushers. From morning to after, it was an.

[A]

Ice cream party at Ms. Pokerman's class.

[B]

Yeah. And she, like, showed up and people, like, made a big deal of it. Like, the teachers and everything were like, we got a surprise. And it was the kid you haven't seen in a year.

[A]

And everyone was just like, you would think LeBron James.

[B]

Well, at the time, it wouldn't have been LeBron James. It would have been like Derek Jeter or Lisa Leslie.

[A]

Jason Kidd.

[B]

Yeah, Jason Kidd.

[A]

I don't know. But yeah, I remember she showed up and I was like, what are you doing here?

[B]

Yeah, you were. It was like the last episode of like, the season finale of Dawson's Creek where it's just like, things are gonna happen and it's just like the X walks in. It's like, what? But you're supposed. You're supposed to have died in a sailing crash.

[A]

In a sailing crash. But, yeah, so that. But you probably weren't happy about that either.

[B]

Yeah, bitch.

[A]

I mean, I'm out of here.

[B]

Nah, I had a one. At that point in time, I had won. So she can come back as many times she wants. You can come back right now. Get her on the episode. It ain't gonna fucking matter.

[A]

I don't know what she's doing.

[B]

I don't care.

[A]

Hope no one finds her. Even though there's very random.

[B]

A thousand million Kelsey's in the world. But yeah, her last name was Kelsey. It was Travis.

[A]

Oh, I get it.

[B]

Kelsey. Yeah, it wasn't Travis.

[A]

Should we end the episode on that?

[B]

Incredibly over the roaring laughter.

[A]

All right, guys, we gotta get out of here now. That was unbelievable, dude. You know what I would love to do? No. Go through our yearbook in fifth grade and just like our class and just like point people out and just remember stuff about them.

[B]

Let's do it. I mean, we're also. We'd be invading people's privacy by doing that.

[A]

Just first names.

[B]

Okay. But that's just an us thing. Like, we should do that, me and you. Like, I don't think people are gonna want to watch an hour that.

[A]

I think they would love to hear about these.

[B]

I think only if we got to 35,000 patrons, they'd really.

[A]

I remember one time I pushed a mirror into a fence and he chased me.

[B]

Yeah. I remember we were trying to come up with cool nicknames for all our friends. So our friend Eric, we nicknamed him exm.

[A]

What is that?

[B]

I was. You were Joe Mudd. I was fax to. He needed one, so he became exm.

[A]

I remember One morning we were walking to school and I was wearing a headband. Not relevant to the story.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I was wearing Completely superb. I was wearing a gray headband. And you wrote facts into the concrete and I was too afraid to write my name in it.

[B]

Sometimes you live dangerously. And that was me. See, sometimes you live dangerously. I remember we.

[A]

I was Ben Savage.

[B]

I remember we went and we played spongebob Uno at your crushes Gillian's house. And we didn't know why it smelled so weird. Hindsight. Reeked of weed.

[A]

Reeked of weed.

[B]

Her parents were big potheads.

[A]

They were like hippies, kind of.

[B]

Yeah, they were like hippies. And like, we played spoons. We played spoons and we played spongebob Uno.

[A]

And they were like, why don't you guys have to be home? And I'm like, our parents do not give a shit. Yeah, I was like, I have to be home at 7:00 for dinner.

[B]

As they were saying that, they were like, why don't you guys have to be home?

[A]

They were nice people and they had a new apartment.

[B]

It doesn't mean the smoking weed doesn't mean they're bad people. Very, very boomer of you, Joey. Wow.

[A]

They. They. No, I just didn't want anyone to think that we were doing that. Also. I went to middle school.

[B]

Yeah. They weren't rolling up joints in front of us. Just so we're clear.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. That was not happening. But, like, I remember I went to middle school with her and her dad drove us home one time in a station wagon.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Something like that.

[B]

Really?

[A]

But I'm in the back seat and then he starts going off about graffiti. And then I remember being like, I don't know. I think it's like, pretty cool. It's like art.

[B]

Never saw her again. It was like, never.

[A]

I legit never got a ride home again. But I don't know if that was because of why. Yeah, we just stopped being me and her. Stop being friends.

[B]

He might have gotten, like, in trouble for, like, you know, rolling doobies or something.

[A]

Nah. He was just like, no, it's disrespectful to people's businesses. And I was just like, nah, I feel like bubble letters are sick.

[B]

You definitely love bubble letters.

[A]

You're the one who got in trouble. You always bring that up, but you forget that it was actually you.

[B]

I got in trouble for it. But no one got in trouble. No one got mad at Joe because he was bubble letter kid. Because he had cool bubble letters.

[A]

That's where we're gonna end it. Yeah. Sorry.

[B]

For the last five minutes, we're just reminiscing. That was just for us.

[A]

But we will get some beer towers in here and it will get a little crazy. I think that we should definitely do that.

[B]

The Beer Tower Boys. Get on the Beer Tower Basement Boys. Bring.

[A]

The. The. The. The Basement yard Beer Tower bash.

[B]

Beer Basement boys Beer Tower bash.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Guys, go follow the show at the Basement Yard on Tick Tock and Instagram. Go. Follow me at Joe Santa. Go. Frank, when they find you.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you. And that is all. We appreciate you guys so much. Don't forget to go to the basementyard.com submit. If you're coming to shows this year in the UK or in Ireland, hit us up the basement yard dot com. Submit, submit, submit, submit. See you next time.