#525 - The Hardest I Have Ever Cried

Summary

The Basement Yard #525 – The Hardest I Have Ever Cried

Release Date: October 20, 2025
Hosts: Joe Santagato & Frank Alvarez
Guest: Ant (recurring contributor)

---

Overview

In this emotionally vibrant episode, Joe and Frank dig into vulnerability, the cathartic power of a good cry, and the importance of seeking joy and authentic connection—both online and offline. Stories about dogs, parenthood, and “Hope Core” moments lead to a discussion about balance, nature, and messy, playful living. Later, the crew dives into sleep paralysis, alien abductions, and the paranoia around the unknowable, keeping things grounded with their signature humor.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Crying Over Hopeful Dog Videos

• [01:35] Joey’s Tearful Experience: Joey shares how a touching TikTok about a dog's last day brought him to tears.
  • “Yesterday I cried for the first time in a while, so hard… sobbing, tears coming down my face, because I saw a video… it’s our dog’s last day. Give us some advice and him a treat. And… at the end it’s like, the dog… they had to put the dog down… And I just started, like, welling up…” (Joey, 01:35)
• Community Responses: Both gush over the supportive, communal comments—people sharing stories and photos of loved pets lost.
  • "It's a sense of community. That's what social media and the Internet should be—a big hug. Instead, it's... a dirty diaper." (Frank, 03:42 / 06:22)

2. The Power and Necessity of a Good Cry

• Therapeutic Release: Discussion of how crying resets emotions and brings balance.
  • “A good cry—scales, okay? The scales of our emotions. Every now and then you need to reset them… recalibrate your emotional stability. You just gotta let it out.” (Frank, 09:07)
• Mixed Emotions in Crying: Joey admits sometimes laughing while crying, feeling silly and cathartic.
  • "I was laughing my ass off and crying. I just kept going, 'You fuckin' bitch!'" (Joey, 09:19)

3. Hope Core and Finding Joy Online

• Hope Core Videos: They discuss the “Hope Core” trend—wholesome, hope-inspiring clips that restore faith in humanity.
  • “Hope Core videos get me every single time. And they have that same song… gets me every time.” (Frank, 04:10)
• Restoring Balance on Social Media: Praising communities that uplift and support, bemoaning how negativity dominates but calling listeners to seek out goodness.

4. The Importance of ‘Touching Grass’ — Nature, Messiness, and Real Joy

• Spending Time Outdoors: Both recall times when simply sitting in the yard, touching dirt, cooking with hands, or jumping in puddles brought real, tangible happiness.
  • “There’s a link between, like, a feeling of serotonin… and getting your hands dirty” (Frank, 10:41)
  • “Go outside. That’s how you know we’re fucked! ...Think about it, in 10 years, what I just said will be profound.” (Joey/Frank, 14:11 / 14:19)
• Reclaiming Messy Joy: Suggestions include making meatballs, jumping in leaf piles, walking barefoot, dancing in rain, and letting go of digital distractions.
  • “Just make a mess. Go somewhere and just make a fucking mess.” (Frank, 18:13)

5. Playful Banter & Ant’s Hypothetical Question

• Paintball Dilemmas: Ant poses a darkly funny would-you-rather scenario involving a gunman and million-dollar temptations. The guys debate risk tolerance and the thrill of “cashing out” before getting shot.
  • "I'd let him shoot one. There's no way..." (Joey, 33:06)
  • “Not leaving that room, brother.” (Frank, 44:27)

6. Sleep, Dreams, & Sleep Paralysis

• Sharing Vulnerabilities: The crew opens up about nightmares, sleep paralysis, and strange nighttime sensations (Frank’s so-called “Sharp Rounds”).
  • "I've never experienced sleep paralysis and I consider myself very lucky." (Frank, 57:55)
  • “There’s this feeling… things are round but sharp at the same time. I call it the sharp rounds.” (Frank, 60:49)

7. Alien DNA, Abductions, and Existential Humor

• Alien Claims in the News: They riff on recent (dubious) reports about people returning from “abductions” with unknown DNA.
  • “So this person… just went to the people who claimed to have got abducted, sampled their DNA, and… at least 11 families had… DNA that didn’t belong to either parent…” (Ant, 66:22)
• Laughing Off the Unknown: Rather than dwell on paranoia, they gravitate toward musing about party-going aliens, cosmic “stag” trips, and probing hypotheticals.
  • “What if the aliens are just, like, sailors… stopping at any port and banging a fish.” (Ant/Joey, 67:41)
  • “It is kind of like… that’s my approach with all these, like, scary things, is like, I have to find something to laugh at… because if not, I will be terrified and I will crumble.” (Frank, 72:13)

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Frank on the Internet, [06:22]:
  • "The Internet has just become just a fucking dirty diaper of a place."
• Frank on Parenting, [05:00]:
  • “The little parts of life are the most beautiful with kids… the unprompted, 'I love you.'”
• Joey on Touching Grass, [10:11]:
  • "It's nice to be outside."
• Joey on Emotional Reset, [09:28]:
  • "It's good to find a little hope and love and joy on the Internet."
• Frank on Outdoor Showers, [16:17]:
  • "Because I like to see the sky when I wash my fucking balls."
• Group on Playful Living, [19:09]:
  • "Let's reestablish a sense of just joy and wonder. Hope Core."
• Joey on Paintball Grudges, [50:25]:
  • "I'm behind a log or a bunker... and I see them walking by and I look at my buddy Brian and I go, now or never. And I fucking—bam, bam, bam..."

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:35] – Joey describes the dog video that made him "sob"
• [03:42] – The healing community of pet loss online
• [09:07] – The catharsis of crying: balancing emotions
• [10:07] – The realness of getting outside, “touching grass”
• [14:19] – The hosts discuss how life online makes the simplest advice profound
• [18:13] – Call to playful, messy living: "Just make a mess"
• [32:06] – Ant's million-dollar hypothetical gunman scenario
• [57:40] – Group shares sleep paralysis and “sharp rounds” experiences
• [65:07] – Discussion of alien abductions and “alien cream pies”
• [72:11] – Using humor to cope with the unknown & cosmic paranoia
• [76:17] – Discussion drifts to bunkers, prepping, and going “down with the ship”
• [78:42] – Throwback pop song singalong and wrap-up

---

Tone & Style

True to The Basement Yard’s spirit, the episode blends sincere vulnerability, vivid imagery, and goofy irreverence. Moments of real emotional openness (tears for a lost dog, reflections on parenting) are punctuated by layered jokes, playful ribbing, and absurd hypotheticals—all delivered in the relaxed, rapid-fire banter characteristic of lifelong friends.

---

Takeaways

• Real connection—whether through crying, outdoor play, or messy cooking—resets the spirit in a way that digital life rarely does.
• There’s power and courage in vulnerability, and humor helps make even the unimaginable (loss, sleep paralysis, aliens) relatable and less frightening.
• The Basement Yard invites listeners—not just to laugh, but to touch grass literally and figuratively, letting life (and puddles) make a glorious mess.

Transcript

[Frank Alvarez]

So good, so good, so good. Just in. Thousands of winter arrivals at your Nordstrom rack store. Save up to 70% on coats, slippers, and cashmere from Kate Spade New York, Vince Ugg Levi's, and more. Check out these boots. They've got the best gifts.

[Joey]

My holiday shopping hack. Join the NordicLub.

[Frank Alvarez]

Get an extra 5% off every rack purchase with your Nordstrom credit card. Plus, buy it online and pick it up in store the same day for free. Big gifts, big perks. That's why you rack.

[Joey]

Welcome back to the basement. Welcome back to the basement yard.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was gonna. I'm starting to run out of ideas of what to do at the start of this. Should I just.

[Joey]

I feel like that's the. What our show is when people always ask, like, oh, how do you guys prep? I'm like, we definitely start the show without knowing where we're gonna go.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I mean, I think, like, you need to just, like, get the jitters out. The cop gets the jit. I don't know if the jitters are what I'm getting out.

[Joey]

You're gonna say jizz. You're gonna get started. Gonna get the jizz. What would you do if you got the jizz out?

[Frank Alvarez]

If, like, I, like, legit was. No, I can't. I can't even say that. I wouldn't do that.

[Joey]

Do what?

[Frank Alvarez]

Jerk off right now on the show. Like, why are you crying?

[Joey]

What are you doing? My dog's here. He's already causing a seamless.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, look at. Here he goes beating me up. Fucking little rat.

[Joey]

Come up here, buddy.

[Frank Alvarez]

He's crying because he.

[Ant]

Because he.

[Joey]

Who's this? Say something. Say go.

[Ant]

Okay, what if he just started talking?

[Frank Alvarez]

That would be.

[Joey]

Started talking right there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Would be pretty cool. No, that would be pretty cool. What would be the first question you'd ask him? Do you love me a thousand percent?

[Joey]

Obviously. Yeah. Yeah, Honestly. Okay, so it's funny that this actually happened just now, because this is a real thing. I wanted to talk about yesterday. I cried for the first time in a while so hard. Sobbing, tears coming down my face, because I saw a video of something where the dog.

[Frank Alvarez]

You got to stop with these dog.

[Joey]

Videos I'm gonna make.

[Frank Alvarez]

You got to stop with these dog videos. You need to go see the horror movie.

[Joey]

What I need is, like, I don't even know.

[Frank Alvarez]

I need to.

[Joey]

I need to find a medicine that will make this thing live forever, because I'm not going to be the same.

[Frank Alvarez]

This thing, he doesn't even view it.

[Joey]

As a person or I definitely do. So this is the thing that made me cry. I saw this video yesterday, and it's. It's a video of this couple and their dog, and they're sitting on a bench, and there's a sign next to them, and it says, it's our dog's last day. Give us some advice. And him a treat. We brought lots. And it's like the sad music. And they're sitting there and the dog is like, whatever. And then people are coming over and sitting with them, and, like, they have other dogs that come, and they're just, like, hanging out. And I'm like. And then at the end of it, it's like, the dog they killed. I mean, they. I don't say they killed the dog. They had to put the dog down, right? And I'm like, oh, my God. And I just started, like, welling up. I'm like, this is so fucked up. It's so sad. The next video that I swipe to and I. I'm gonna try and get through this without crying again, because every time I read it, it kills me.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, we'd probably do pretty good if you started crying on the show, Joey.

[Joey]

This says to all other.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can't even read. You want me to read?

[Joey]

Says to all the other doggies in heaven, please be kind to my baby. Jesus Christ. And it's a little dog. And it says, he doesn't like being away from his mom and is scared of other dogs.

[Frank Alvarez]

So then he should probably not go to doggy heaven. He should go to, like, regular heaven.

[Joey]

Then don't. Oh, that would be nice. And then the comments are pictures of other people putting pictures of their dog. And this one, it's. This one is another dog. And it says, my girl arrived on Wednesday. She loved little dogs. She's got him. I was literally like, fuck that bitch, bro. Like, she knows I'm reading Charlie as her name. And then this one. My big boy's got him. He always looked after his little pug. But if you go in the comments.

[Frank Alvarez]

It'S all, oh, that's sweet. It's a sense of community. See, that's what social media and the Internet should be, is like a big hug. Instead, it's a big. I agree. It's a big.

[Joey]

This, bro, the thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, that's the Internet. What? The thing that made me, like, start.

[Joey]

Crying or whatever in this first video.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is like, look at this.

[Joey]

These are random people coming, and they're, like, sitting down and with their dogs. Like, this is so sweet.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's acts of kindness. I'm going to tell you this. What is it called on TikTok? I think it's called, like, Hope Core. It's like Hope Core videos.

[Joey]

Yes.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hope Core videos get me every single time. And they have that same song over it that gets me every time.

[Joey]

It's called A Thousand Years. You know what else I saw? Because that was also. That was like, Hope Core.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, this whole. It was just all videos that were.

[Joey]

Going to make me cry. I saw a video and it was a guy and he's doing something with his daughter. They're like, mixing something, like they're about to bake or some shit. And then the girl out of nowhere just goes, daddy, you're my best friend.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. And the dad's like, those fuck me up.

[Joey]

And I was like, I'm not gonna survive children at all, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

You are not. You are not. I was putting Ruby to sleep yesterday.

[Joey]

Oh, God.

[Frank Alvarez]

And it's. First of all, the little parts of life are the most beautiful with kids because, like, you don't realize, like, you were like, I love you, blah, blah, blah. But then you hear it from them, like, unprofessional, prompted. You'd be like, oh, do you love Daddy? Yes, I love Daddy. Oh, that's nice. That means something. But also, I asked you, like, give it to me real. I'm putting her to sleep, and she's like, can you scratch my back and sing me a song?

[Ant]

Of course.

[Frank Alvarez]

Absolutely.

[Joey]

This is your daughter. You would ask me to do that?

[Frank Alvarez]

Of course I do. Whatever. Yeah. And then she go. And I go, all right. You know, I say my, like, bedtime words to her and whatever, and she goes, no, please stay for 20, 50 minutes. That's when she thinks of, like. When she thinks of things in, like, big numbers terms. She goes, 20, 50. And I'm like, you want me to stay? And she goes, yeah. And I go, why? And she goes, well, it's because I love you so much.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, at that point, I. I'm.

[Joey]

Sleeping in the room.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm not kidding. I would have stayed there until now.

[Joey]

The year 20.

[Frank Alvarez]

The year 2050.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's not that long. It's only. That's only 27. 27 years, Joey.

[Joey]

That's a long time.

[Frank Alvarez]

I definitely didn't add right, 25. But, like, dude, Hope Core. Hope Core. Because, like, that's what the Internet should be. It should be the community set. Because the Internet. Here we go.

[Joey]

Negative.

[Frank Alvarez]

You ready?

[Joey]

It's negative.

[Frank Alvarez]

You ready? Fucking Internet. The Internet has just become just a fucking dirty diaper. Of a place.

[Joey]

A dirty diaper.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, you. You see that, you know it's there, and you see that it's a diaper, and then you're just like, oh, it's sagging. I know. What's making it sag? Shit and piss.

[Joey]

Yeah. I think we're focusing on the diaper too much. Feels like you have, like, you deal. Did you deal with a big dirty diaper today or something?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, every day, baby. Every day. Every day. Made feels up. Bastards up.

[Joey]

It's a blowout up the.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm just saying, like, the Internet was supposed to be a communal place that is representative. I genuinely believe, genuinely believe that normal people within our society are kind hearted. Most people, yeah, are kind hearted. Are vying and looking for a sense of belonging and acceptance and community. So when the Internet does that, why did I go with Maniscalco?

[Joey]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

You hear what I'm saying?

[Joey]

I follow some pages that do that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I get so fucking frothed up, dude. There's one page that's a crazy way to describe. We're back to come. Yeah, I guess there's one page that does the whole. Like, this streamer had no views.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And they're like, I donated a dollar. And then they were like, oh, thank you so much. And then they get thousands of views.

[Joey]

I fucking love it. Yeah. Yeah. I love that shit.

[Frank Alvarez]

So how long did you cry?

[Joey]

A good 15.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's it.

[Joey]

That's it. Well, I was going through, like. I'm talking about a real 15, by the way. I was laughing. Cause I'm like, I'm crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm crazy.

[Joey]

I'm laughing.

[Frank Alvarez]

And I liked it.

[Joey]

Cause I hadn't cried in a while. So I was like, yeah, no, Frank.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was bursting out laughing, like, laughing, crying.

[Joey]

Laughing my ass off and crying. I just kept going like, you fucking bitch.

[Frank Alvarez]

Were you alone? No.

[Joey]

Nicole's videotaping me like, I'm a psychopath. Like. And I'm like, yeah, it's great. I mean, she was crying. Like, anyone who's watching those kinds of things, you're gonna cry.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, I think it's also good to reset your emotional balance. You gotta get it out.

[Joey]

And as it was coming out, like, as I was crying because then I was crying and, like, that's what made. Made it so funny to me, because I'm crying and then I can still feel that I have still. I still have more crying.

[Frank Alvarez]

Cry in your throat. I love feeling cry in my throat. Yeah.

[Joey]

Like, you know when you start crying, you're like, I. Because it's all packed in, right?

[Frank Alvarez]

And you feel it. You're like, there it is. It's right there. I could. If I like, shove my fingers down my throat, I touch the cry.

[Joey]

Exactly.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because it's so palpable.

[Joey]

I want to just.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just scream. I just want to go, ah, well, a good. And cry. A good cry. Scales, okay? The scales of our emotions. Every now and then you need to reset them. You need to rebalance, recalibrate your emotional stability. You just gotta let it out. So it's good to feel. Find a little hope and love and.

[Joey]

Joy on the Internet.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because you don't know where it is, bro. You don't know. You got to find it sometimes.

[Joey]

You know what's interesting? And I know this is probably very obvious, but I'm going to say it anyway.

[Frank Alvarez]

Happiness is interesting.

[Joey]

No, I was going to say that when you especially like a day like today, it's a fall day, it's nice and breezy, it's kind of cool. The sun is out. There's some clouds in the sky. It looks like the Toy story fucking bedroom or whatever the fuck. And you're walking around and you're like, this is better than anything, but we spend all our time online. And online, a lot of it is just negative. And it's like. Though, if we just. And I know a lot of people say it as like a diss. It's like, yo, go touch grass.

[Frank Alvarez]

But yo, really think about that. Dude, I am not kidding.

[Joey]

It's nice to be outside.

[Frank Alvarez]

I spent the last two days just kind of getting stuff done around the house. Not on my phone. And at one point I just sat in the yard.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And I just sat there and I looked up at the sky and I saw the moon. And. And I was like, when's the last time I did this?

[Joey]

You know, my sister said to me this morning, because I went to my mom's and she said that. She's like, the other day I just laid on the grass.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

And just like, was just watching the clouds.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yo, one of my favorite things, Becca taught me this. One of my favorite things. She saw a study once and. And it makes sense. She's like, there is a. Whether it be correlation or. Or what, but a link between, like a feeling of serotonin. Like, not serotonin. No serotonin. Yeah, dopamine, whatever. And getting your hands dirty, like in the grass, like plant. Or in meatballs. Like meatballs.

[Joey]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Alvarez]

When I grab ground beef and I see your hand through its fingers.

[Joey]

Yeah. It starts pooping through your fingers.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's just.

[Joey]

Nothing better than that, dude. There's nothing better.

[Frank Alvarez]

Nice. Just getting all the meatballs in your hands.

[Joey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what you need to do soon? You know what I do with the kids every now and then? Make meatballs in your hands. We get. We get. We cook down. We cook with fresh tomatoes. Put them in a bowl, smush them, smush them, smush them.

[Joey]

You know what?

[Frank Alvarez]

I like avocado, but I don't.

[Joey]

I don't like to hold. No, no, no.

[Frank Alvarez]

Avocado's too soft.

[Joey]

Wait, but if you have the masher and you're like, I like that. Masher.

[Frank Alvarez]

Mash.

[Joey]

Yeah, I do like that a lot. Lot.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm just. I like to look like pepper, you.

[Joey]

Know what I mean? Like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, you like to growl, like.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Who's that guy? He's like a. He does like the meat. He's a meat guy. On what site? He's on TikTok. But he, like, he grabs. I'm gonna use this. Happy Thursday here. He, like, grabs the pepper mill and he, like, spins it in his fingers, and then he just fucking catches it and he cranks that shit. Is that the guy who's like, oh.

[Joey]

He'S got a toothpick in his mouth. He's got.

[Frank Alvarez]

And he's just like. Today we're making the wagyu of every bird.

[Joey]

Wait, does he talk? Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, how else would he.

[Joey]

Well, I think there's a guy that I've seen on Tick Tock, and he, like, always has a tank top and a toothpick. No, no, no.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's another guy. He's got. This guy's got meat. He's got me.

[Joey]

All got. They all got him.

[Frank Alvarez]

But, like, he's like, Today we're cooking the wagyu of every. Of, like, like, three different types of brisket. And it's like, cheap. Middle. A five. Yeah. And he spins it and he's just like, ooh. Listen, I'm gonna help you. I'm gonna. This is what Dr. Frankie's gonna order for you. I got a prescription for you. Okay, Rx, more of what I'm gonna give you. Don't go home tonight. Whoever's watching this today, tonight or in the next couple days when you have the availability, stay home, put music on, and cook a meal that requires you to get your hands a little dirty. Fresh pasta.

[Joey]

Let's make this easier.

[Frank Alvarez]

Fresh sauce.

[Joey]

Get your hands in a bowl of.

[Frank Alvarez]

Meat and just give it a little. Or even better, go Collect dirt.

[Joey]

Put your hands in the dirt.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't bowl of dirt. And put a little water in there and just mix around in it.

[Joey]

You know what? I don't mind a worm.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't mind a worm. You like worms?

[Joey]

If I'm touching the earth, I don't like it.

[Frank Alvarez]

If it's like, what else are you getting them?

[Ant]

I don't know.

[Joey]

If I had like a bag of like, miracle grow and there's like a worm in there, like, the fuck are you doing here? But if I'm in the earth, I'm touching the earth.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't mind a worm. Or Roly Poly.

[Joey]

Oh, I love. I love Roly Poly. I used to kill him, but I don't do it anymore.

[Frank Alvarez]

Good for you.

[Joey]

I used to be like.

[Frank Alvarez]

I just think, like, there is. I know we're saying the most obvious thing in the world. That's what I was going to say. And we're trying to, like, hijack it. Is like, it's our idea now.

[Joey]

No, I know. And I was like, that's how you know we're fucked. Because I'm over here being like, oh.

[Frank Alvarez]

It'S so nice to go outside. That's how fucked we are. Think about in 10 years, what I.

[Joey]

Just said will probably be, like, profound.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can almost.

[Joey]

And I'm saying go outside.

[Frank Alvarez]

It will not be profound. Guarantee that. I just think, like, there is. And listen, this is coming from a person that, like, loves to unwind. What? Playing video games and like, just kind of like puzzle. Beck and I started a puzzle recently.

[Joey]

What kind of puzzle?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like a 2,000 piece puzzle.

[Joey]

Oh, jig.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. What other puzzles are there?

[Ant]

3D.

[Joey]

What is that? What's a 3D puzzle?

[Ant]

You build it up.

[Joey]

I've never even heard of that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Really?

[Ant]

They're really hard.

[Joey]

I thought, I don't know, like a puzzle. I figured it could be like, I.

[Frank Alvarez]

Don'T know, like, what do you think I'm doing? But a puzzle is kind of like.

[Joey]

A general jigsaw puzzle.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, but, like, it's where you put it. I had to set up, like a table in my room.

[Joey]

That's the worst.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know. I know it sucked, but. But like, just like something where you can just kind of like aimlessly do nothing and tap out. And like, if you want to go outside and you want to just walk in the park, collect a pine cone, go find a pine cone.

[Joey]

Can you eat pine cones?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. Acorns. You can, but you got to boil the tannic acids out. The tannins oh, okay.

[Joey]

Yeah. But remember we used to decorate pine cones?

[Frank Alvarez]

We did. I did it with the kids the other day. We got them rhinestones. They brought them home. They painted them, painted them, paint them. But, like, see, like, this is. We are so inundated with just, like, entertainment. Your phone and over here and streaming and fucking Apple music. Just do something that is so low. Lift.

[Joey]

Let the wind hit you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Let the wind hit your fucking ass, dude. Yo, when's the last. I'm not saying.

[Joey]

I'm being dead serious. No, no.

[Frank Alvarez]

Threaten indecent exposure. I'm not gonna tell people to do that.

[Joey]

When was the last time the wind has hit your ass, though?

[Frank Alvarez]

Recently? We got an outdoor shower.

[Joey]

Yeah, you have an outdoor shower?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, yeah, babe.

[Joey]

And you got out there and you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Dumped it, and I was in that shower. Shower. And is it.

[Joey]

Is it surrounded? Yeah, it is nice.

[Frank Alvarez]

You step out. You got your. I step out. I. I got my. My. My towel on. Where do you guys.

[Joey]

I thought you were gonna be just, like, holding your shit.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I step out, I got my towel on, and I just. Yeah, the breeze.

[Joey]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ant]

Why did you use the shower outside for?

[Frank Alvarez]

First fun outdoor.

[Ant]

Just for fun.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because I like to see the sky when I wash my fucking balls.

[Joey]

Wasn't that. Be nice. That would be nice, though.

[Frank Alvarez]

When's the last time you looked and saw the clouds while washing your.

[Joey]

Do you have a window?

[Ant]

No, I don't have a window. Oh, yes, I do have a window.

[Frank Alvarez]

Do have a window.

[Ant]

How do you know if I have a window?

[Frank Alvarez]

I've been to your bathroom while you're in it. And your shower.

[Joey]

I've showered in your bathroom.

[Ant]

Frankie, get out of here. No, I've seen. I've seen a cloud.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's nice. Do me a favor.

[Joey]

I like an outdoor shower. You know what I would do if I was you?

[Frank Alvarez]

Don't point. I would.

[Joey]

If it rained. I would go into my backyard and roll around in the mud like a pig.

[Frank Alvarez]

Listen, it poured. It poured yesterday. Guess what we said to the kids. Go play it off. Door open. Get the fuck back there.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And Maeve and Ruby were sitting there, walking back and forth, just singing.

[Joey]

I love being in the rain.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love the rain, dude. I love being in the rain. Because. Because. Lot of R B music videos I've watched. You best believe. Anytime I get in the rain, I find a puddle and I kick like Usher.

[Joey]

I like to be out in the rain because it just. It makes me feel like Usher. It makes me feel like the song unwritten. You Know what I mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

Release your inhibition. I'm like, oh, I'm just out here and I don't even care. I'm so wet. You know what I'm gonna do with my floor? You know what I'm taking this we're taking with the basement yard is starting a fucking movement. We're taking back the world.

[Joey]

We're not.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, no, we're not doing it.

[Joey]

We already know. But, like, what we're saying is obvious.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just make a mess. Go somewhere and just make a fucking mess. That's what I'm talking about. This is what we're calling this.

[Joey]

We're saying make meatballs.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Make a mess. You need to make a mess.

[Joey]

Or now that the fall is coming, make a messy giant thing of leaves.

[Frank Alvarez]

And jump in a messy fall.

[Joey]

Everything.

[Frank Alvarez]

You have to coin everything. We're not coining this. Whoa. We did it.

[Joey]

You make a giant triangle of leaves and you jump in it and you get a couple ants on you.

[Frank Alvarez]

You get a couple bug bites. Whatever. Listen, you know how I feel about leaves, about life? I hold on. I hold on to a childlike imagination, sense of wonder, playfulness. You know that. You know that about me. And I'm not just talking to Megazords. I'm talking just like in the way I go about. I like pranking people, making hotties.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's fun for me. Yeah, let's bring that back. Let's reestablish. Let's reestablish a sense of just joy and wonder. Hope, core.

[Joey]

Frank, we're gonna prefacing a conversation that.

[Frank Alvarez]

We are 18 minutes. We're already deep in the baby. But like I'm establishing, we're gathering the basement yard. Our fans and our supporters are so fucking incredibly supportive and they get behind us with the movement. Get behind us with this movement. It's going to be called by Joy Corps.

[Joey]

You know what I think about? You know that scene in what's it called? Fucking Shawshank Redemption where he's outside and he just escaped prison. It's raining.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I got a better scene.

[Joey]

What is it? If it's a fucking Marvel movie.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, you're going to like this one. The remake of the Longest Yard, where they're practicing in the.

[Joey]

And they're just having fun and it's CCR sign.

[Frank Alvarez]

I want to know, have you ever seen the rain? Boom, boom, boom.

[Joey]

Grown men playing in a puddle. What's better than that? That's weird coming out of my mouth.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no, no, no, no, no.

[Joey]

But it's.

[Frank Alvarez]

But you get What? I mean, they could play in puddles, but when they make puddles, that's when it's a problem.

[Joey]

Now I'm confused.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's come. Yeah.

[Joey]

No, that's great.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh my God, I want to go.

[Joey]

Jump in a puddle right now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Listen, I saw a dog yesterday.

[Joey]

I went for a walk and there was a dog walking over and there was a puddle because it rained and he was drinking out of the puddle.

[Frank Alvarez]

And you like that filthy little.

[Joey]

And I was like, that's disgusting.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's a filthy fucker.

[Joey]

I think it's.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Joey]

I kind of like when dogs like don't listen and they just jump into like mud and. Well, because.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hey, hey. But Joey, in their nature.

[Joey]

Are you gonna explain the nature of.

[Frank Alvarez]

A dog like in there? Like you. Like this happens with kids all the time. When the kids see a puddle, they want to jump in it because there's a beauty in that. You see water and it's just like you just want to jump in a puddle, watch a fucking splash out.

[Joey]

Preaching to the choir, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

Messy fall. That's all I'm saying. I know you getting on me for having a coin turn.

[Joey]

I'm not saying messy fall. I'm saying just in general. I think for all of the season. Like even in the winter, even in the sum. In the spree.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but the sun is tough. The sun is tough. No, some is tough, cuz.

[Joey]

Yo, get out there and slip and slide.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can't. You can't get messy in the winter because the ground is fucking rock solid, dude.

[Joey]

It's talking.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's.

[Joey]

It's making snow angels. Yeah, but you don't know when your boots.

[Frank Alvarez]

You don't get messy.

[Joey]

It still counts. You get snow everywhere.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but I don't consider snow everywhere to be a mess because it cleans itself.

[Joey]

It's a metaphor. I don't know if it's a metaphor.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't think so, but I'll.

[Joey]

You know what I mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, well, see. You see what happens? You rebalancing your emotional well being.

[Joey]

Crying.

[Frank Alvarez]

Crying brought out what is going to be the movement that sweeps the nation. We are going to be at the forefront. We're going to be at the forefront of it. We aren't.

[Joey]

We're not going to be at the forefront. It's very nice. I like, I definitely want to jump in a puddle at some point this year. That's going on my bucket list.

[Ant]

I don't like how it ruins my shoes.

[Joey]

What?

[Frank Alvarez]

Water?

[Joey]

Rain.

[Ant]

Like jumping into a puddle and rain.

[Frank Alvarez]

Let me Tell you something. But, like, you won't ruin them. Guess what? Throw them in the dryer. Or guess what, brother? Ruff. Ruff. Let the fucking doggies out. I'm talking Baja men. I don't agree. Who let the dogs out? You should.

[Joey]

I don't agree because I think there's something fun about letting your shoes just get wet.

[Frank Alvarez]

Let me ask you a serious question. You guys spent a lot of time outdoors in the summer? Yeah. You guys. You live. You live in New York City, so there's not many times that you get to do this. When's the last time you were on grass? Good grass. Barefoot.

[Joey]

I do that a lot when I go to my mom's. She has a little bit of grass.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just. Just go and let the doggies bark on the lawn.

[Joey]

Are you one of those people that don't let, like. They don't like their feet out?

[Ant]

I'll have my feet out, but I don't want to, like, ruin my shoes.

[Frank Alvarez]

Leave your shoes inside. This is not that complicated, saying, jump.

[Ant]

Into mud and puddles and.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay, but you could do it barefoot. Puddles.

[Joey]

Well, you have shoes that. Certain shoes that are like, oh, these are beat up. So I could just wear them wherever.

[Ant]

These are my puddle jumping shoes.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, they could be literally called galoshes. You can literally buy.

[Joey]

What is that?

[Frank Alvarez]

Golosh?

[Ant]

I thought that was a soup.

[Joey]

Yeah, goulash.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, that's goulash. Galoshes.

[Joey]

What's the Russian prison gulag? We're getting close now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay, a galosh. Goloshes are.

[Ant]

Wait, now you said goulash. Again.

[Joey]

You said goulash.

[Frank Alvarez]

Goloshes.

[Joey]

That's multiple goulash.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, that's. No, that's goulash.

[Joey]

Goulash.

[Frank Alvarez]

Goulash.

[Joey]

So what's goulash?

[Frank Alvarez]

Plural?

[Ant]

If you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Four seconds of your time. I'll get there.

[Joey]

He said it.

[Ant]

I think you're saying it.

[Joey]

Say it again.

[Frank Alvarez]

Galoshes.

[Ant]

That was better, I think.

[Frank Alvarez]

Goulash.

[Ant]

Wait, now he said goulash. Oh, okay.

[Joey]

It's a stew.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is it a soup?

[Joey]

Soup.

[Frank Alvarez]

Whatever. I don't know, cuz I've never had it. Because I'm not Russian.

[Joey]

First of all, I've had it. My mom made it and it was all right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, thanks.

[Joey]

It's got, like, meat.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gulag. Yeah. Russian prison.

[Joey]

Call of duty. Right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Galoshes are rain boots.

[Joey]

Oh, I don't know if I have a.

[Frank Alvarez]

You don't need them. Yeah, go put your dogs in the fucking earth. That's what I'm talking about. Release Your little feet ease. Feel the grass in your toes. You can do it in your front yard. You can do it in your backyard. Cut me off. Come on. Come on.

[Joey]

Cut me off.

[Frank Alvarez]

Cut me off. This is where I need you to step in and take over.

[Joey]

I mean, once you said something, I was like, like, oh, we're getting somewhere. I didn't know where it was going to end.

[Ant]

It was going really good. If you, if you rhymed at the end, I feel like we would have gotten applause.

[Joey]

All right. Yeah, that would have. That fell off a cliff.

[Frank Alvarez]

I will say let.

[Joey]

Let. Don't try.

[Frank Alvarez]

Don't try in the yard.

[Joey]

You're already burning in crash. What are you going to do? You can't drive a car crash.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can't. You can drive a car crash if there's still a little bit of life left in it. And there isn't. I'm still.

[Joey]

There isn't.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm just saying, like, just go and just step outside. I know you. You don't have grass.

[Ant]

It's not that hard.

[Frank Alvarez]

What?

[Ant]

That's what would rhyme with the art.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know what you. Let's.

[Joey]

Let's write.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why are we harping on this song? You know what? You know what? Let's you and I, let's write the messy fall anthem.

[Ant]

Okay?

[Frank Alvarez]

Natasha Bedingfield.

[Joey]

This is getting out of hand.

[Frank Alvarez]

She will allow us, Frank, you know that. She will allow us the creative freedom to write our own song loosely based off of unwritten. But it's about walking barefoot on grass in the fall when the soft grass is out still and the dirt is soft.

[Joey]

Yeah. Okay. We do have sponsors for the show today.

[Frank Alvarez]

I wonder who one of them is.

[Joey]

Yeah, I wonder who it could be. We have Happy Thursday here, folks. Okay. Happy Thursday. How you doing? Right here, right on the desk. But they are bubble free, so they're non carbonated spiked refreshers and they taste amazing. Which one is this? This is strawberry. This one is delicious. Actually, I've had that one. Raspberry dragon fruit. And what's that one?

[Ant]

Pineapple star fruit.

[Joey]

Pineapple star fruit. These are not. I mean, that is not a common flavor that you have anywhere. So they have that. They also have mango, passion fruit, two things that if I see them in a drink, I am getting it. Okay. But they're smooth, they're easy, 4.4% alcohol, naturally flavored, and like I said, non carbonated, so they taste really good and they go down easy. It's not going to make you all like bloated or Whatever, you know what I mean. So no fuss, no fizz. Delicious. But to find out more and to find a happy Thursday near you, visit drinkhappy Thursday.com basement that is drinkhappy Thursday.com base basement okay. Celebrate responsibly. Non carbonated, naturally flavored with other natural flavors. 21 + contains alcohol so yeah, can't have it unless you're 21+ because these are alcoholic but they are delicious non carbonated happy Thursdays. So enjoy that. And we also have BetterHelp. BetterHelp this, this podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, which is online therapy. You can get in contact with the therapist in just under 48 hours. So it's a quick turnaround. They make the onboarding process very easy. It's also very easy to switch from therapist to therapist until you find the right fit for, for you, someone who meshes with you, that you vibe with. That's a very important part of therapy. Can be very awkward if you kind of feel like this person doesn't understand you. So it's very helpful. But yeah, there's a lot of people that signed up with with better help that have reached out and said that it's, it's helped them. And the, the biggest thing about it in my opinion is that they make it more affordable than in person therapy, which is very expensive even with the right insurance. But even a lot of therapists don't take insurances. So it's very expensive. But BetterHelp is more affordable and you can save 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com basemanyard so that is BetterHelp spelled B E T T E R H E-L-P.com basemanyard to get 10% off of that first month. So get to it folks.

[Frank Alvarez]

And whatever journey you're on, whether it be personal wellness. What? What? Personal wellness, whatever journey you're on, thank you for being along the ride with us here at Santa Gata Studios and the basement yard. And if you want to continue to contribute and maybe get a little more bang for your buck, over to patreon.com the basementyard. I tell you about it every single week. And honestly, now is the time to join. Why? Because every time is the time to join. What do they say? When's the first time? When's the best time to plant a tree? 20 years ago? The second best time today? When's the best time to join the Patreon years ago? When's the next best time? Right now. So go check it out. Patreon.com the Basement Yard. You sign up for that first here you get these weekly episodes or one week in advance. You get exclusive, exclusive content if you sign up for that second tier every single Friday. So you get two episodes of the Basement Yard every single week. And one of those episodes is a week in advance. We're trying to do what we can to make you happy and you seem to like us. Thank you for getting us over 34,000 paid patrons. It means so much to us. We are consistently moving in the right direction and your help and support is allowing us to do some cool things here. So thank you so much. Go to patreon.com thebasemanyard if you want to sign up. And if you want to save yourself a couple bucks while you're doing it, go to the web browser version of it. Go onto a web browser, whatever, Internet Explorer, Chrome, give me another one, Safari. Go to the web, go to, type in patreon.com thebasevineyard and sign up on there. If you use the smart app, whether it be on the Google Play Store or the Apple Store, they're going to charge you a couple extra bucks. So save yourself money. Patreon.com the Basement Yard thank you. We love you. We appreciate you. Now also, if you're coming to any of the Basement Yard shows, there's not much left. I don't know. I don't know. Honestly, by the time this comes out, I'm not sure exactly what is left. But go check out the basementyard.com see if there are any tickets left. There might be some available still for msg, maybe some of the other shows. But check it out. We'd love to have you there. The shows have been so incredibly fun. We are so excited for the upcoming shows. As of recording, we have a couple and then, you know, MSG is right around the corner. And if you're coming to any of those shows already, you already got tickets. Go to the Basement Yard.com submit there's a portion of our show that we'd like it to be interactive. We talk to you, about you, with you. You submit cool, interesting, crazy, insane stories. And if we pick them, we talk at the end of the show about them. And they're nuts. They've spawned some of the coolest, you know, conversations and funniest moments of these shows. So go check it out. If you're coming to any of the shows the basementyard.com submit. Let us know what show you're coming to and then submit your responses. All right, we love you. We appreciate you. We miss You? Yeah.

[Joey]

All right fellas, it's that time of the week again.

[Frank Alvarez]

Who made that? Shout out to name is Jacob Ullery. Dude, that's awesome.

[Joey]

Yeah, it's great. He's the one who always makes the.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like the singing ones.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's incredible. Yeah, that sounds like. That sounds like something magic is what it sounds like. It does sound like magic.

[Ant]

So does that mean I have a theme song?

[Frank Alvarez]

I guess technically we don't even have. What's the ant question?

[Ant]

I'm supposed to have a question.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, if we play ant question. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. If we play ant question, you need to have aunt question.

[Ant]

I'm kidding. I have it. So it's a little more of a scenario. But. But let's say this. You're in a pitch black field, 40 meters away from a gunman. Yeah.

[Joey]

Can we go American feet?

[Ant]

120.120Ft away from a gunman.

[Frank Alvarez]

And change.

[Ant]

And change. He can't see you, he can't hear you. And he's gonna fire.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, it's gotta be an American because he's got a gun.

[Ant]

That's fair. He can't see you and he's gonna fire off one bullet at a time. You get a million dollars for each bullet he shoots. How many?

[Joey]

Just me and him out there.

[Ant]

Just me and you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Can I lay down?

[Joey]

Me and you. You're the gun Mac.

[Ant]

It's me. No. Yeah. You could only stand. You can't crouch or lay down.

[Joey]

Oh, can I turn sideways?

[Ant]

No, you gotta face him. You gotta face him.

[Frank Alvarez]

Head.

[Joey]

Okay, fine.

[Frank Alvarez]

You got to be face to face. Yeah, can I? I have to be within. I have to be exactly 120ft away from him.

[Ant]

You could get me close, you could get closer, but just not further.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why would I do that?

[Joey]

Well, it depends where he's standing. Maybe I'll get behind him.

[Ant]

You can't see him.

[Frank Alvarez]

I imagine it. You've got to set up within like 180 degrees straight line.

[Joey]

I mean I'm letting them fire off a couple.

[Ant]

Really?

[Frank Alvarez]

Wait, how much do you get per bullet?

[Ant]

A million?

[Joey]

I'd let him shoot one. There's no way.

[Frank Alvarez]

Do I have to stand in the exact same spot every single time?

[Ant]

Let's say you can move around after each round. Or you could stay there.

[Joey]

Ooh, am I also not able to hear? Because if he shoots in a direction kind of big. I'm gonna go stand over there.

[Ant]

Now you can.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I don't think you're going to be able. It's 120ft. Like a shot's going to sound like a shot. You're not going to hear it, like, whiz by and be like, oh, it was over there.

[Joey]

Yeah, that's fair.

[Ant]

If you heard it whiz by. I think it's better to stay in that spot, probably.

[Joey]

It would be hard to.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, no, I think the rule of, like, if you. I mean, there's an unlimited amount. There's an unlimited amount of. Why the phase? You don't know that.

[Ant]

Because now, I don't know if you said unlimited or unlimited. Mr.

[Frank Alvarez]

Unlimited. There's an unlimited amount of places that he could shoot, but in theory, on the second one, it would be minus one. So unlimited. Minus one.

[Joey]

Well, he could still shoot in the same area.

[Frank Alvarez]

He could still shoot in the same area. But you are banking on the possibility that, like, if I shoot here, my next shot will not be there again. It'll be anywhere else. Yeah, I mean, just so you know, what I just said contributed nothing. Yeah. To any part of this.

[Joey]

You like doing that?

[Frank Alvarez]

I did a little bit.

[Joey]

I think I would. Like, if I can't see, let's.

[Ant]

I mean, it's pitch black, so, you know.

[Joey]

Okay. I think that if I survived one shot and I felt like that wasn't even near me, it would be hard not to let one more go. I'm not going over three shots.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, a million dollars, tax free.

[Ant]

Sure, you could.

[Joey]

What if I get shot and survive? I get that mill, you get that mil?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, you do?

[Ant]

Yeah, sure.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why not?

[Ant]

And you could keep going, I guess, if it's not fatal. If you really want.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I imagine once you get shot, once you're done.

[Joey]

Yeah, I stub my toe and I'll be down, so I don't know, I'd probably let one go.

[Ant]

I think I'll do the clip.

[Joey]

I don't know if I know how far 120ft is.

[Ant]

Should we look it up like a range?

[Joey]

No, no, I'm saying, I'm saying like, like right now, like, how far is that wall?

[Frank Alvarez]

I would say that's maybe like 25ft.

[Joey]

Oh, really? Oh, that's far.

[Ant]

You think that's 20.

[Joey]

Oh, how wide we go?

[Ant]

It's a field. Let's say it's a football field. He's in the center.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, football field.

[Ant]

Let's say he's in the center.

[Joey]

He's at half field. Why am I saying that? Yeah, what midfield?

[Ant]

Because I think that's, that's close to a hundred to 120 each side, right?

[Joey]

Football field is 120 yards.

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

So across.

[Joey]

Well, if you include the end zones.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no, no. He means.

[Joey]

Oh, across.

[Frank Alvarez]

52 yards. 52 yards, yeah.

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

So he's got 26 yards on either side. Oh, God.

[Joey]

I mean, that's pretty big, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

Definitely letting them shoot 120ft. So that's. What, how many? 40. So he's on the 60 yard line regardless.

[Ant]

Yeah, we don't. It doesn't have to be on a football field. Like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like.

[Joey]

Yes.

[Frank Alvarez]

That range helping me understand.

[Joey]

I think I. I think I'm. I'd probably shoot twice and be like, okay, I'm getting out of here.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, two. I think. I think he would also have to.

[Joey]

Get me in the face for it to be like. And then, like. Then, like, that's bad.

[Frank Alvarez]

Other parts of your body, that if he shoots you, that you will die instantly.

[Joey]

Not if we have EMS on site.

[Frank Alvarez]

Nope. Get you.

[Joey]

What's the stuff?

[Frank Alvarez]

You ever see movies where, like, they take, like, tampons?

[Joey]

Oh, no, no. It's like a black powder. And they, like, shove it in there, and they, like, kind of hold it in. It's like, all right, get it, hold it. And, like, what's the word that coagulates it? No, I don't.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know what movies you're watching, Joey. I've never.

[Joey]

Movies.

[Ant]

You tell me when they put gunpowder.

[Joey]

In it, does that help?

[Ant]

Quarterizes it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I.

[Joey]

Well, that's like, with hot.

[Ant]

Yeah. They light it on fire.

[Joey]

Doing.

[Ant]

You're not supposed to do that, though. Rambo did that once.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, yeah, Rambo did it.

[Joey]

It's got to work.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's got to work. I think because I'm not a gambling man, especially with my life.

[Joey]

Right.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think I'm letting two shots off. $2 million gambling with your life. I know, but, like, that's like. I would definitely do one. Yeah, I would definitely do one. Because it's just. That's a million dollars and the chances of me getting hit are so very slim. So slim. I think after two, I would be like, I already have two. Like, I. I'm good. Like, I don't need more than that.

[Joey]

I already know your answer. It's gonna be.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, he just said he's gonna let the full clip go. 16. 16?

[Ant]

I thought it was 9. We don't know guns.

[Frank Alvarez]

There you go. I thought a clip was 16.

[Joey]

I mean, if you're doing, like, a fucking Dirty Harry, it's like six shots.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. I mean, I would. I would imagine we would go a standard. Like, it doesn't matter how many shots it is. Oh, no matter. They can reload.

[Joey]

No, no.

[Ant]

Yeah, but I'm just saying. 1.

[Joey]

What about like a clip magnum?

[Ant]

Oh, that would do me. That'd be it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Any of the bullets would be it.

[Ant]

Yeah, but that's a big one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Three.

[Ant]

Joey, just empty the clip on me.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's why not on you. I think that.

[Joey]

Really?

[Ant]

Yeah, yeah, it's fine. It's a cool story too. Like, dude, he had. He had nine bullets, couldn't get me once.

[Frank Alvarez]

No. Cool story for the grave.

[Ant]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

The obit.

[Ant]

No.

[Joey]

You gotta tell God that if I make it.

[Ant]

No. He probably make fun of me.

[Joey]

That's true.

[Ant]

God, if I got up there, it's like.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I was going to say there might be some other reasons. You might not even get to talk to the corporeal form.

[Joey]

Wow.

[Ant]

It could be true.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm right there with you, bud.

[Joey]

I'll be up there.

[Frank Alvarez]

You think so?

[Joey]

Heaven.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, bro.

[Joey]

I went to church until eighth grade. He knows me.

[Frank Alvarez]

So did I. Yeah. Joey, there's things that happened while you were going to church that I think would have disqualified you.

[Joey]

What did I do?

[Frank Alvarez]

There were things that you did that.

[Joey]

I'm going to hell.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Oh, you're talking about, like, premarital.

[Frank Alvarez]

Sure.

[Joey]

That's why I didn't have sex before eighth grade.

[Frank Alvarez]

I didn't say then.

[Joey]

Oh, he knows that I'm. He knows that I'm doing it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm saying now. Yeah. You're doing sex, dude. Yeah.

[Joey]

That's bad.

[Frank Alvarez]

You've done sex before.

[Joey]

He forgives that we're all doing it.

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, you have to apologize.

[Joey]

Sure. I'll say Hail Mary probably too. Did you do your confession or not? Confession, what's that called? Confirmation?

[Ant]

Yeah. I'm confused.

[Joey]

Your confirmation name.

[Ant]

James.

[Joey]

And did you, like when you, you know, you go. I don't know if that's communion or confirmation, where you have to go. And then it's like you do confession and they give you homework and they're like, say 10 Hail Marys or something like that.

[Ant]

That's confession.

[Joey]

Yeah, I know, but I don't know which one that is a part of. Have you done that?

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Joey]

And what did they do? You know. Do you remember how many prayers you had to do?

[Ant]

I think I did to help 2 all fathers and one Hail Mary, which.

[Joey]

Is such a funny thing. There was one. It's called the act of Contrition. No one knows it. It's a Long one and. I don't know it. It's not one of the popular ones. You know, the. Our Father, probably.

[Frank Alvarez]

Our Father, who.

[Joey]

We've established that it's not. Who does art in heaven.

[Frank Alvarez]

Halloween be thy name.

[Joey]

You know, that's not it either.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hallowed be thy name. My kingdom come.

[Joey]

It's thy kingdom come.

[Frank Alvarez]

Thy kingdom come.

[Joey]

Because you don't have a kingdom.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, technically.

[Joey]

Technically, you have a house.

[Frank Alvarez]

I have a home and a family. That's my kingdom.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay.

[Joey]

So my kingdom come.

[Frank Alvarez]

My will. Thy will be done. I will be done.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

On earth as it is in heaven.

[Joey]

Yep.

[Frank Alvarez]

Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses. As we forgive those who trespass against us. Yep.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And deliver us to temptation. But not from evil or something like that.

[Joey]

Why would we go to temptation?

[Frank Alvarez]

Or remove us from temptation.

[Joey]

Deliver us from temptation.

[Frank Alvarez]

Deliver us from temptation. Wait.

[Joey]

What is it? Now I'm. Now you got me. I.

[Frank Alvarez]

Honestly, I'm shocked I got here.

[Joey]

The only reason why you know this is probably because you were in my house, right?

[Frank Alvarez]

No. You guys weren't doing a lot of Hail Mary. You. The only reason I know Catholic grace is because of you.

[Joey]

Well, yeah, you know, but how do you know our father then?

[Frank Alvarez]

I went to Sunday school for a couple years.

[Joey]

Did you?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Not many were we in the same class. We had to.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Really?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Not many.

[Joey]

I don't remember that.

[Frank Alvarez]

You were the poster boy, dude. A Sunday school. They were.

[Joey]

No, my Sunday school teacher hated. No, she heard me say at Alex's house.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, she was upset with you. But you apologized.

[Joey]

I. I didn't. Why would I apologize?

[Frank Alvarez]

You apologized.

[Joey]

Well, I didn't even know that she.

[Frank Alvarez]

Was talking about me.

[Joey]

I got to class and she was like, some people in here have a.

[Frank Alvarez]

Potty mouth, Joey, people love. You were the poster child for Sunday school.

[Joey]

Frank, you weren't even there.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was there for like two or three years. I hate two or three years. I'm just letting you know. Listen, church. I know you're listening.

[Joey]

Now you're speaking.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm speaking directly to the Church.

[Joey]

The Catholic Church?

[Frank Alvarez]

The Catholic. Any church. Oh, no, actually, it's the Catholic one I'm speaking to. I should probably not talk to them.

[Joey]

You're going to talk to all the other churches.

[Frank Alvarez]

I probably shouldn't.

[Joey]

Why shouldn't you talk to them?

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, it's. I.

[Ant]

It's.

[Joey]

Say it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I just. I'm not qualified. I don't want to. I don't want to.

[Joey]

You're not Qualified to talk to the church.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't want to insult anybody.

[Joey]

It feels like you're about to.

[Frank Alvarez]

Please, please, please stop. No school on a Sunday morning is nuts.

[Joey]

Well, the idea. I understand.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's, it's, it's the Lord's day. I understand.

[Joey]

But everyone's going to church anyway.

[Frank Alvarez]

I understand. Who the. The Lord's day. You gotta understand. You gotta know that. That's like you're, you're, you're setting, you're setting yourself up for failure. Well, Sunday, 8:00am Be there.

[Joey]

What time was Sunday school?

[Frank Alvarez]

It was like 10 to like 12.

[Joey]

Yeah. Yeah, but I would much rather be in Sunday school than church. Back then I was like, church sucks.

[Frank Alvarez]

Couldn't do it. Couldn't do it. What were we talking about?

[Joey]

I don't know. We're on.

[Frank Alvarez]

How did we get to Catholicism? From aunt shooting a gun into a room at us.

[Joey]

Something about God. You were meeting your maker and stuff.

[Ant]

Oh, yeah. No, I wouldn't be or something. But you would let us in. You would give us, you would give a. Put a good word in for.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, you'd be like, you'd be like the, the promoters at like the teen club. Yeah, I would just be like, yo, he's with me.

[Joey]

Say my promo code at the door.

[Frank Alvarez]

Say my. Say promo code. Joe. Spotlight.

[Joey]

Joe.

[Frank Alvarez]

Spotlight. The spotlight. Spotlight. Entertainment Joe.

[Joey]

Yeah, I would probably let off two shots, get that two mil, and then I'm out of there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

We should film this video though, with like a paintball gun. Okay, well, none of us have a gun, but I think we should film that video. I think that'd be cool.

[Frank Alvarez]

What would we use?

[Joey]

Yeah, I haven't been shot with a paintball gun in a while.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, baby gun.

[Joey]

A BB gun.

[Frank Alvarez]

BB gun.

[Joey]

I haven't even like seen it. BB gun.

[Frank Alvarez]

And since like 2000, I've seen BB guns.

[Ant]

So where we would all be in.

[Frank Alvarez]

A pitch blackfolded shooter. We should get the orbeez guns.

[Joey]

What is that? Oh, I know what orbeez are, but.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, they're, they're, they look like.

[Joey]

But they hurt. Good to hurt.

[Frank Alvarez]

You want it to hurt?

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, all right, so then I guess we'll do paintball. This is scary.

[Ant]

Some fear this is.

[Frank Alvarez]

You need some fear.

[Joey]

You're gonna wear a.

[Frank Alvarez]

We're here.

[Joey]

What? You're gonna wear a helmet, a face mask and shit.

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Joey]

And cover your little Paulinos.

[Frank Alvarez]

Don't talk about my Paulinos.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Ant]

What is the.

[Frank Alvarez]

But if it's a. See, here's the thing. If it's a real gun, that's different than a paintball gun, bro. If it's a paintball gun, you can shoot me in the fucking face.

[Joey]

Yeah, okay, so we'll do. Each shot is a hundred dollars. Like, whatever.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm not leaving that room, brother.

[Joey]

Okay, but if you. If you get shot, like, if you're like, oh, like, you. Three shots, and now you're like, I have 300 bucks. Like, I'm chilling. But if you eventually get shot before you cash out, then you owe the gunman that money.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, so wait, hold on. So let's say I get. I'm in the room, and someone lets off six shots, 600 bucks on the seventh shot, if I get hit, I owe them 700 bucks. Yeah, I'm not doing that.

[Joey]

Well, this is the dilemma. I'm not doing that ever. Like, nothing.

[Ant]

You were about to sacrifice your life for two shots.

[Frank Alvarez]

$2 million.

[Ant]

Yeah, I guess so.

[Frank Alvarez]

But I don't want to pay someone. Pay me.

[Joey]

Yeah, I mean, that's why you gotta be strategic.

[Ant]

I'll get a thousand. Get out of there. How do I tap out? Just tap out. I'm done.

[Frank Alvarez]

If it's a paintball. If it's paintballs, I. I'm staying in that room for a while.

[Joey]

I think if you get shot in the face, that's double.

[Ant]

Who's shooting?

[Joey]

Think that. Whoever wants to shoot.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm a good shot. Although I'll be blindfolded.

[Joey]

I don't know.

[Ant]

I'll do it.

[Joey]

You do what?

[Ant]

Whichever.

[Joey]

I think we should do this video. I think that would be cool.

[Ant]

Okay. We can set it up.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is gonna be hysterical because who are you gonna get in that room?

[Ant]

We should just do a metal baby.

[Joey]

I feel like that's worse.

[Ant]

Yeah, exactly.

[Frank Alvarez]

You got to be careful with metal. Bb, you're into bdsch.

[Joey]

You want to be.

[Frank Alvarez]

He has to turn it up. Yeah, he has to. He has to.

[Joey]

How about we chain up our. Our wrists and then slap some duct tape on our tits?

[Frank Alvarez]

What if we use an actual gun? Yeah, that's what I could see you saying. What if we do it shirtless? That's what you would say. Yeah, that's what you would say. And then you would say, like, the loser has to eat this fire cheese.

[Ant]

Ball, or we tape those squeaky chickens to your feet and you have to run around.

[Frank Alvarez]

That'd be funny. Oh, no, no. So they're gonna hold it in their mouth. They have to hold it in their ass. Or if they get hit.

[Ant]

I meant more.

[Frank Alvarez]

So I'm not kidding. What is happening? That's the worst contribution I've ever had to this show, ever.

[Joey]

Are you talking about, like, the. Like the yellow chicken?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Ant]

If you tape them to your feet, and when they run around, the gunman can hear them, and then they stop.

[Joey]

He's like, but why didn't. Why would you run? Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why would you move at all?

[Ant]

Let's say you have to move every time.

[Joey]

No, that would make that. I'm not doing it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, that would make it too easy for the gunman.

[Ant]

Too easy. It's blindfolded.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

But if you hear a general direction of where they are, but there's six.

[Joey]

Of them, then you're six one.

[Frank Alvarez]

What? Someone's getting hit.

[Ant]

There's six of us in there.

[Joey]

Oh, no, no, no, no. I'm not doing this.

[Ant]

All right, fine. We'll workshop it, but we'll do it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think.

[Joey]

Figure it out.

[Frank Alvarez]

Realistically, if we were to do something like that, like paintball in a room or something like that. Ten shots.

[Joey]

That's what you said. Thousand.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think. I'm sticking around for 10.

[Joey]

Might get clapped, though.

[Ant]

Where does the money come from? Also the gunman.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Ant]

Maybe Joe just shoots.

[Joey]

Maybe I just shoot.

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Yeah. But I might get paid.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I have to pay the people. Like, if I'm the gunman, like, it's like, I owe you.

[Joey]

If they. If they get out. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, then why.

[Joey]

I mean, you don't have to be the gunman.

[Ant]

He's setting himself up to be the gunman, and we just pay him.

[Frank Alvarez]

He just wants to shoot us.

[Joey]

No, I just take it off.

[Frank Alvarez]

Idiots. When's the last time you went paintballing?

[Joey]

Like, right after high school, and it was a lot of fun.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love paintball so much. I like it, too. Didn't we just have the conversation about me mom?

[Joey]

We were in, like, somewhere talking about it. That, like, there's this place out Long island that has, like, a fucking plane.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. That's just sick.

[Joey]

Yeah, that would be fucking.

[Frank Alvarez]

That would be really, really cool. I was really good at paintball.

[Joey]

Here we go.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm. No, I'm serious. I was really, really good. There was that. There was that. That paintball place in Long Island City, the indoor one, the speedball one.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And, like, I would go often with my brothers and, like, because it was like, if you only showed up with, like, two or three kids, they just put you with another party. And we got put with a group of, like, like, semi pro players.

[Joey]

And then you killed all of Them. And then you and you went to.

[Frank Alvarez]

The White House and you, like, you just.

[Joey]

They built a monument of you in front of the whole thing and put your picture on the wall. And you were only 8 years old and everyone else was like 32. Paintball legend was sitting here.

[Frank Alvarez]

You see what I got to put up with? You see, I can't even tell a story without him fucking jumping down my throat.

[Ant]

I used to go to the Big game, they called it, and it was at Deer park and there was helicopters and tanks and it was like 100V, 100.

[Joey]

The big game.

[Frank Alvarez]

You want to hear a story? This is a good one. Okay. We went once at the lake. We went. We did like the, like the kids versus the parents. We were like 12 at the time. And it was like me, my brothers, the Espos, Pat. And we played like six. So it was literally like. I think it was like eight on seven or something like that. But like there. There were two. Two girls at the lake. I don't want to say who they are, cuz I don't want to give them away, but like, you know who they are.

[Joey]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Of an Irish family, I. Yep, yep. I couldn't stand them at the time.

[Joey]

Irish people playing paintball is a dangerous game because they bruise like peaches, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

I couldn't stand them at the time. Not both of them. One of them I couldn't stand at that because she was just annoying and mean and rude. So I said that day, I'm 12 year old. I said, I was like, yo, if this person is on the other team, like, I'm going to shoot them. Like, I'm going to. Like, I'm going to get them.

[Joey]

Well, that's the.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know, but like, it was like, I'm going to go out of my way to find this person. And I didn't. And we played like five games. And on the last game, they were just like, all right, how many ball. You guys have like 20 minutes left, so just play until you're done. But if you run out of bullets, put your hands in the air with your gun and just say, I'm out. And let them like walk across.

[Joey]

Feel like I know where this is going.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm behind a log or a bunker or something and I see them walking by with. It was the two of them and then one of our friends, moms, and I see them walking by and I look at my buddy Brian and I go, now or never. And I fucking. Bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam.

[Joey]

Were they out of ammo?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. They were out.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Fucking pieces. I was but shot an innocent civilian.

[Joey]

Technically, that's what's happening.

[Frank Alvarez]

This person's dad was on the other team also and found out. He ran up to me.

[Joey]

Yep.

[Frank Alvarez]

He got as close as you could get and he shot me right on the inner thigh.

[Joey]

Hell, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, I. I don't bruise or welt very easily. That was like the worst of. The worst that I've ever gotten in my entire life. It just missed my Polino.

[Ant]

Did he say something cool?

[Frank Alvarez]

You probably, you know, I'm back. Something like that. Big mistake. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joey]

You're toast. You're toast.

[Frank Alvarez]

Your toast is a good one.

[Joey]

That's a. I don't even know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Here's Daddy.

[Joey]

That feels. Now you're making it like a different kind of video.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no.

[Joey]

Here's daddy. Here's this welt on your thigh. Jesus. Take it easy.

[Frank Alvarez]

You did that.

[Joey]

I know.

[Frank Alvarez]

You just did that.

[Joey]

And we also have sponsors that I'm sure are gonna love that, but we do have.

[Frank Alvarez]

Whoop.

[Joey]

I just opened up FaceTime there for a second. We have some sponsors here. We have Simply Safe. Okay. Simply Safe. This is a home security system, but it is a game changer. The agents that you know will monitor your house, they will take action while the intruder is still outside. Not just before, you know, not just, you know, while they're inside your place. Like, if people are snooping around your house, they will know and they will take action. Get the proper authorities there. There are no long term contracts or hidden fees and you can cancel at any time. But they were named the best home security system by U.S. news and World Report for five years running. So you're going to want to keep your. You want to keep your home safe, obviously, with these. They have cameras and the monitoring system. But yeah, it's. It stops crime before it even starts by confronting potential threats the moment they appear. Okay? So it's real security that's going to stop it before it starts. So it's nice to have that. And right now our listeners can save 50% on a SimpliSafe home security system at simplisafe.com basement. Okay? That is simplisafe.com basement. You will save 50% on a simply Safe home security system. And Frank has. I'm in an apartment, but Frank has a house. They're all hooked up with Simplisafe. Every window. They got cameras. They got. What's the thing? The.

[Frank Alvarez]

The monitors or they got motion sensors. We got. We got. We got panic buttons. We got Stuff, smart locks. Listen, I can't speak highly enough of Simply Safe. It was incredibly easy to set up, incredibly intuitive to use after and it makes our home feel safe and secure, which is all you can ask for.

[Joey]

Yep. Right now, like I said listeners, you can save 50 on Simply Safe home security system@simply safe.com basement. So there's no safe like simply safe. Enjoy that. And lastly here we have Squarespace. Squarespace is a website that you can build your website as your for like your first impression is a big deal if you have an e commerce business or you make content or whatever the case is when people go to your website they are judging you based on that. So if you have a great product but your website is really bad, it may deter some people from either buying something or whatever the case is. So you're going to want a professional looking website and you can get that with Squarespace. They make it very easy. They also have a lot of tools to make sure that you're optimizing your traffic and making sure that you're, you know, putting your marketing dollars in the right areas and they're telling you where the traffic is coming from, all of that. So it's very helpful. And like I said, they have these templates that can, you know, you can create a professional looking website very easily and you know, they kind of take care of everything from there. And you can head to squarespace.com basement. You will save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain when you use that code BASEMENT. Like I said, that is squarespace.com BASEMENT to save 10% off of your first purchase of a website or a domain when you use that code basement. So enjoy that folks. All right. And before we end here, I, I do want to talk about something you actually brought up before this and that is that there's been stories that people, they found that there's like alien DNA and people that have claimed to be abducted does that. I mean and this is like you've heard the stories that people get abducted and then they get probed and you know, for whatever reason, we don't know if it's for sport or if it's for research purposes. I have no idea. I mean, but that's a common thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, it's like one of the well known things about like alien abductions is like they're probing.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Which for those of you guys that don't know what that is, it most of the time it's sticking things anal. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joey]

But finding DNA, what is That.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, that's good.

[Joey]

I know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Come on.

[Joey]

There's traces of.

[Frank Alvarez]

What is that?

[Joey]

What is that? You. You. How do you know it's alien DNA? I guess it's like.

[Frank Alvarez]

I guess it's just like they can't. They can't tell. I'm. I mean, DNA is. You can tell if it's, like, from a. An animal, a human or something. So, like, if they're just like, what is his DNA? This person was abducted. The animal, the alien is.

[Joey]

It feels like something happened.

[Frank Alvarez]

It seems like something is going on.

[Joey]

I would. I mean, we actually spoke to someone on OPL that claimed to have been abducted. And the way that they talked about it, I found to be a little fascinating, actually, because it's. They were like. It feels so real to me. But in a logical mind, you're kind of like, that couldn't have happened, but it feels so real to them.

[Frank Alvarez]

Here's the thing. I have had. Not recently, but, like, in my lifetime, I have had dreams where I've been like, whoa. Like, that felt real.

[Joey]

But when you wake up, you're like, that was a dream.

[Frank Alvarez]

Or. Or was it. You know, like, I've had that happen. I have, yeah. I've had. I've had that happen.

[Joey]

And, like, you're still unsure.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, no, I know it was a dream now, but, like, with the benefit of hindsight now, like, of course there wasn't a face in my wall looking at me and laughing while spitting a blue ooze, but, like, that was it. Yeah, man. That episode of Are youe Afraid of the Dark?

[Joey]

Me up. You were a child.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was a child, yeah. And I had it as an adult. But what I'm saying, though, is that, like, it takes me a couple minutes, but, like, I could imagine that there are people that have had dreams that have been so intense to the point where it's like they can't make the distinction whatsoever.

[Joey]

Yeah. I mean, that happens to me sometimes, but I. I think that's just me being, like, paranoid. Like, sometimes I'll have a dream of, like, this is a stupid example. I can't think of an example of the top of my head.

[Frank Alvarez]

But if I.

[Joey]

If I had a dream that, like, my leg got cut off or something, right. I would. Sometimes I wake up and I, like, just check my legs, you know?

[Frank Alvarez]

Even though I wake up and I'm.

[Joey]

In my bed, I'm like, obviously, that was not real, but I check.

[Frank Alvarez]

But, like. But you got demons, right?

[Joey]

I have demons.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, what are sleep paralysis demons?

[Joey]

I don't that's not my experience with sleep paralysis.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do have that sometimes there are people that have. It's a well documented phenomena that people experience sleep paralysis.

[Joey]

Does that happen to you?

[Frank Alvarez]

No. Thank God.

[Joey]

Get sleep paralysis.

[Frank Alvarez]

Never. I have. I consider myself quite lucky and I'm gonna knock on as much wood as I can. I have never experienced sleep paralysis and I consider myself very lucky.

[Ant]

Three times.

[Joey]

You have. But you have like a figure that you see.

[Ant]

Yeah, it was an old woman.

[Joey]

Oh, oh, fuck that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I get. I get.

[Joey]

Wait, hold on. You were.

[Ant]

So I was laying down on my back and I was just like my eyes opened, but I couldn't move right. And then like this old woman was just like floating right here on top of me. And then like, what?

[Frank Alvarez]

She looked like she was.

[Ant]

It was very scary and I couldn't. It makes sense. And I couldn't move. So like, slowly, I was just like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Bitch. You used all her strength to call her a fist. The only thing I could get out. It's the only thing I can get out that you could think of as this old sleep woman demon is hovering over you is to insult her.

[Ant]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Was she flying or. She was kind of leaning.

[Ant]

I don't. I. That part I don't know. But it felt like she was floating.

[Frank Alvarez]

She looked like. Did you watch the. The. The what movies are those? Not the Conjuring, the other ones. The Insidious. Insidious movie. She looked like that woman. Valak, I think is the name of that.

[Ant]

No, no, she was old. Like older. Valak's like a nun thing. She was just look like an old, scary woman.

[Joey]

Oh my God.

[Ant]

I just like. The only thing I get out was.

[Joey]

Like, bitch, what does it feel like when you come out of that? Because that's not my experience with it.

[Ant]

You like, finally. It doesn't. It's not all at once. Like, I can move my arm and then like, then as soon as you could get one body part out, like everything comes out, your brain turns on.

[Joey]

Got it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, crazy for me.

[Joey]

I never see anything, but it feels like I'm awake but my eyes aren't open. Like I can't see my room, but. But my mind is awake and I can't see anything because my eyes are closed and I can't move. So then I start panicking and I feel like I can't breathe. So I'm trying to like, regulate my breathing. And then I'm trying to like, move my leg, like so hard and it feels like I'm moving it like a Like a tiny bit. And eventually when I come out of it, I come out of it all at once and I'm like, oh, God, thank you.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I can. Like I said, I consider myself very lucky that I never experienced that. I. I have, during my life, experience two things. One more frequently. This is gonna make sense to nobody. And it's so stupid sounding, but like, it's a very weird one. Is like, I feel like I'm. This happened to me like a couple days ago. I feel like I'm moving at the speed of light. Like I. I'm not kidding.

[Joey]

In your sleep.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, as I'm laying there, like, if I like, blink or roll over or something, it feels like it's happening at literal superhuman speed. Like super speed.

[Joey]

Super speed. Like you rolling over.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, whether I, like, if I were to like, do this or like, blink or roll over or something. If I'm not, it's like you're. It feels like to me like it is happening. Like the Flash.

[Joey]

What the hell?

[Frank Alvarez]

Very weird. The other one, which is so weird. And I remember I used to get this as a kid and it like, very randomly happens. This is gonna make no sense. But it's called the sharp rounds. It's not called that. I call it the sharp rounds. I was just about to. It's not called that. I call it the sharp rounds. Where, like, there's this feeling and I can't. It's not like I'm touching anything. I'm not moving. It's just this feeling of like, things are round but sharp at the same time. And like, if I were to like, rub my hand around, like a pillow. It's a rounded pillow, but it feels like it's cutting my hand. It's so weird.

[Joey]

But this is happening in your dreams?

[Frank Alvarez]

In my sleep, as I'm trying to fall asleep. I'm very. I consider myself very lucky. I fall asleep very easily. The sharp round. I call it the sharp rounds. And I remember as a kid and I. And it like, very, very randomly rarely happens. I don't know the rhyme or reason.

[Joey]

When's the last time you had the sharp rounds?

[Frank Alvarez]

Within the last, like, month and.

[Joey]

And.

[Frank Alvarez]

But like before that, years.

[Joey]

But is that like in a dream you're walking around and.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no, no, no. Like, I am. I know. I'm actively trying to, like, you know, like, you. You have to like, pretend you're sleeping in order to fall asleep.

[Joey]

Like you're. Yeah. You're like in Twilight.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And like, there's just this feeling of just like there's round things, like your pillow. Whether it be the pillow or just like, I can feel that there's something over there that's round but sharp. It's. It sounds so crazy.

[Ant]

So you don't actually have to touch it.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, but, like, then I think about touching it and I'm like that. Hence the name. It's so weird.

[Ant]

What I was thinking was maybe, like, you don't realize that your hands asleep and you're touching, but like, it's also.

[Frank Alvarez]

It is. But isn't a tactile thing. Like, I can imagine touching something and it. And it is that. But then I could also just think about it.

[Joey]

You never looked up this.

[Frank Alvarez]

I've never looked at. I've never. I've also never shared this with anyone outside of Becca before I had the.

[Joey]

Sharp rounds last night.

[Ant]

I feel honored. Thank you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, and now all of the.

[Joey]

Well, that's. That's interesting. I don't know if I have anything like that. When I. When I do have sleep paralysis, though, and I get out of it, my body is so tired. It's almost like what I imagine. Anesthesia is like, where I'm so tired and I know that once I fall back asleep, it's going to happen again. So I wake up and then I, like, can feel myself, like. And I'm like, I just. It's gonna happen again. I have to fall back asleep and.

[Frank Alvarez]

I get it again. I'm gonna tell you something. Not with anesthesia is like, Literally, anesthesia is just like. Like it's the blink of an eye.

[Joey]

Well, I just imagine like, you know the feeling of, like, you're getting tired and you're going like, that's what it feels, bro.

[Frank Alvarez]

At least my experience with anesthesia was not like, oh, I'm getting sleep here. I'm getting sleepy. It's literally like, here. They're there. Like, it's. And I know everyone's is different. Let me make that very clear.

[Joey]

But it was like, I hate that. I know it's going to happen again.

[Ant]

I had another one where I was facing the wall and just like this shadow was coming up the wall very slowly. And I was like, it just didn't feel right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Watched a lot of goosebumps.

[Joey]

I watch.

[Ant]

I'm a big horror guy. But that one I came out of like, hoot. No, like, that one, I was like, oh, that one was bad. Like, that. I had to get out of that one.

[Joey]

Like, you know what happens to me a lot because I'm blind. I have to take my contacts out. And then I go to the bathroom, and sometimes I'll walk out into my room, and certain things look like other shit. Like, it looks like a person standing there. If it's like. Like a plant or, like a jacket hanging or whatever. And, like, it. Sometimes it, like, really freaks me out. Like, I'm like, oh, yeah. And, like, it just gets me because I'm just seeing, like, shapes. Like, it's dark. I can't see, like.

[Ant]

But what do you think would be there?

[Joey]

I. I don't know. Like, it. Sometimes it looks like someone bending over, like, grabbing something or, like. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's different when you have, like, you guys. Well, you're in a house, you're in an apartment, but, like, you have one way in and out of your apartment. I have.

[Joey]

I'm not thinking about that, though. Oh, in the middle of the night.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. Well, once you have a house, you will. Because you have front door, back door, window.

[Joey]

Well, then that's when I'll, like, probably be like, oh, this really could be.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's when you get simply safe.

[Joey]

Yeah. Yeah, Exactly.

[Frank Alvarez]

But, yeah. All this stemming from the possibility that aliens are coming in people.

[Joey]

Yeah. That's a tough one.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's insane. I would, like. Now that that information came out.

[Joey]

Have you ever.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm not telling anyone I got abducted.

[Joey]

I. I mean, well, people were saying when they get abducted that they do get probed. They're like, it was a real thing. And the guy that we had talked to on other people's lives said that he vividly remembers being, like, on a ship. Like, a door opening up and him being. And, like, seeing people around.

[Frank Alvarez]

Can I ask you a serious question? If you could opt into being abducted. Probing is in there. You're gonna have to. Yeah. Are you doing it?

[Joey]

No.

[Ant]

Do they give me a goodie bag?

[Joey]

Like, here's some merch on your way out. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Here's some alien cream pie. Yeah, no, that's the goodie bag. As you get cream pied by an.

[Joey]

Alien, it would be interesting to know that it's, like, a real thing.

[Ant]

I. I pulled up the article, like, getting beamed up.

[Frank Alvarez]

I would like. I would like to not be beamed up. What if. I would like. If I were to be abducted, I would like the technology to be kind of close enough to what we have here on Earth. Because if I got beamed up, I'd be like, yo, that was so cool. I need to have that happen again. Like, I'd like it to just be like, they guide me onto a ship.

[Joey]

You'd be begging For I'd be like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yo, beam me, daddy.

[Joey]

Probe me again. What's to say in the article?

[Ant]

I don't know how true any of this is, but. So this person, Dr. Max Rempel, just went to the people who claimed to have got abducted, sampled their DNA, and out of that, at least 11 families had large chunks of DNA that didn't belong to either parent or their immediate family when they came back from the abduction.

[Frank Alvarez]

See, this is possible, man. It's possible.

[Joey]

Do you think that eventually that means that they can, like, their child will have more of that DNA?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, that would be cool.

[Joey]

And now eventually we'll all be aliens. But we're all aliens.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's like sleeper cells. You remember that? The idea that, like, they can, like, maybe, like, activate it. Like, what movie was that? Guardians of the Galaxy, Volume 2. Where, like, ego goes and, like, puts his seed in different planets, and then he can just be like, got it. And they fucking start like, what if the aliens are doing that? So then when the time comes, they just be like, yo, by the way, we've been inseminating. Yeah, For a lack of better terms, people on your planet for the last 500 years. And it's DNA that follows down, maybe. So, like, there's like a. They could activate, like, a sleeper cell. Alien supporters.

[Joey]

Or maybe they're just like, you know, the sailors of the intergalactic world and they're just stopping at fucking any port.

[Ant]

And banging a fish.

[Joey]

Yeah, yeah. Like, they're just, like, stopping at, like. Wait, what?

[Ant]

What.

[Joey]

What did you say?

[Frank Alvarez]

And, like, you said banging a fish.

[Ant]

And, like, banging a fish.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no. Port in a storm. Baby sailors, they.

[Joey]

They would show up to places and, like, they would have sex with women.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because they're the song Brandy by Looking Glass.

[Ant]

Oh, I thought you're saying we were the fish.

[Frank Alvarez]

No one is having sex with fish. Why are you bringing a fish?

[Ant]

Because you said sailor. Yeah, I thought to the aliens coming in our butts, we were the fish.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right, no one's a fish. And also, let's talk about human beings, like a sailor.

[Joey]

So the. The idea is, like, a sailor back in the day would get to, like, New York, for instance, and they would go out to the bars and stuff, and. And they would hook up with girls, but then they just leave. But they wouldn't use protection. It's like, I'm never gonna see this woman again because it was back in the day.

[Ant]

So we're the girls.

[Frank Alvarez]

We are the girls. We are the girl.

[Joey]

And they would show up.

[Frank Alvarez]

Brandy Brandi, you're a fine girl. What a good wife you would be. But my life, my love and my lady is the sea they got to get out of there, baby.

[Joey]

You know? Like, so they. They're just showing up and be like, you know, we'll probe a couple of these bastards and. And get the hell out of here. They'll never see us.

[Frank Alvarez]

Or. What if it's, like.

[Joey]

That's kind of funny.

[Frank Alvarez]

What if it's, like, the equivalent of, like, fucking, like, people on, like, stag parties, you know, where, like, there's like, oh, we're gonna go for, like, we're going to Vegas for a stag party. And it's like, the aliens just like, yo, we're going to Earth for bachelor party.

[Joey]

What's a stag party?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. I've heard of it. Don't care. Bachelor party is what I meant. Party. Yeah. I don't know, but you know what I mean. Like, we're going for Eck King Scions.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Bachelor party. We're going to Earth. Wait till you see what they got down there. And they show up and they land in, like, Alabama.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And it's just a racist old white man.

[Joey]

I mean, it's such a crazy thing, man. And I. I honestly sympathize with those people because imagine something like that happening and feeling like no one's believing that this happened. Like, that would be so tough to.

[Frank Alvarez]

Have something that, like, you know, is real.

[Joey]

And you're like, I know that it's unusual, but I know it's real.

[Frank Alvarez]

That would be very isolating. And I. And I. And I.

[Joey]

That would be terrifying.

[Frank Alvarez]

In that regard. I am sympathetic to people that that has happened to because I can imagine the feeling of isolation and, and, and. And loneliness. But I. I, I don't know. I. I don't. I think a part of me just doesn't want to think it happened because it's scary.

[Joey]

Yeah. I don't want to accidentally talk.

[Frank Alvarez]

What if they're listening right now? What if the aliens are just like, yo, we picked up.

[Joey]

They're gonna get you. No, they're gonna get you.

[Frank Alvarez]

If they're, if they're fucking. They're. If they're going for anybody. They want you, Joey.

[Joey]

I don't know about that.

[Frank Alvarez]

You think so?

[Joey]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Tell me more about what? Me.

[Joey]

You're probable.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's not what I wanted.

[Joey]

That is what he wanted.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't want it. I didn't want that.

[Ant]

If alien would choose anybody to probe, I think they choose you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why?

[Ant]

You're very desirable to probe.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, see. Yeah, bro. Why, though?

[Ant]

Where do you think you rank out of us? Three to probe?

[Joey]

Just in out of ten.

[Ant]

I think I'm probable.

[Frank Alvarez]

But what level is probable? Because technically, all of them are probable.

[Joey]

Technicality. Technical.

[Frank Alvarez]

Frank.

[Joey]

Neck. And no Frank.

[Ant]

Seven and a half.

[Frank Alvarez]

Out of ten.

[Ant]

Six and a half. Nine and a half.

[Joey]

Not. Dude, that's nine and a half.

[Frank Alvarez]

That feels like, for the probe.

[Joey]

Seven and a half.

[Frank Alvarez]

And you're like, please probe me, dad. Yeah, I think.

[Ant]

I think it'd be cool.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I'm not probable. I'm a four.

[Ant]

Oh, you're way higher than.

[Joey]

I really wonder. Have you guys ever seen, like, a UFO or something like that?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I don't think so. Rebecca, like, recently, like, looked through, like, an old video, and she's like, there's a UFO in the back.

[Joey]

Well, how old was the video?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, four years ago?

[Joey]

Oh, that's not.

[Ant]

I thought.

[Joey]

I meant, like, an old video. I'm like, oh, maybe it was the camera or something.

[Ant]

You guys had a UFO problem, right? Or something.

[Joey]

What?

[Frank Alvarez]

The drones. Last drone. That feels like that was decades ago, dude.

[Joey]

That does.

[Frank Alvarez]

And, like, everyone was freaking out because of the drones.

[Joey]

I do. Yeah. I mean, that was an interesting thing, bro. I also, one night was laughing so hard because there were people saying that there was a bro. And maybe this is true, but it's just funny to, like, I. I don't know. Someone's like, there's a mothership off the coast of New Jersey.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, yeah.

[Joey]

Drones are coming from the mothership. Yeah. And I was laughing so hard at that one. At that. Like, if you're just speculating that, to me, that's hysterical. And if that's real, even funny, even.

[Frank Alvarez]

Funnier, because it's like, we are fucked. Mothership.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, mothership. It is. It is kind of like mother. That's my approach with all these, like, scary things, is like, I have to find something to laugh at about them, because if not, I will be terrified and I will crumble.

[Joey]

Can you imagine, like, yo, there's. There's a ship the size, like, Puerto Rico.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, who cares?

[Joey]

Imagine, like, Independence Day. Yeah, bro. I think about that a lot.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do, too.

[Joey]

Whenever I see clouds that, like, look like a line, I'm like, imagine the coming out.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do that anytime I said this. I do that. Anytime I go over, like, a bridge, I, like, look out in the horizon and, like, imagine I see something just, like, coming over the horizon, and I'm.

[Joey]

Just like, a Big monster or a ship.

[Frank Alvarez]

Either or.

[Joey]

Yeah. You know, I like to imagine.

[Frank Alvarez]

I would like to imagine nothing.

[Joey]

I do imagine a lot.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do, too, but I would like not to.

[Joey]

Okay, well, that's the paranoia.

[Frank Alvarez]

So gets me.

[Joey]

It's a vicious circle.

[Ant]

If you're the one that saw it, it'd be very unfortunate that it's like, oh, this had to happen here. Like, why is it so close? Like, I would much rather see it on TV somewhere else.

[Frank Alvarez]

I would like to think that I'd be able to drive away from it.

[Joey]

That ain't happening.

[Frank Alvarez]

Did you hear what I said?

[Joey]

You would like to think.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, to think is the key word.

[Ant]

Yeah. You would need everyone else to drive away. Traffic. You get stuck behind a car, now you have to run. I don't think you could outrun it.

[Joey]

I will say, I think that the idea of, like, you know, like Godzilla, like, there's something very deep in the water that's like a big monster or whatever, I kind of enjoy it.

[Frank Alvarez]

You lose Frankie. You lose Frankie.

[Joey]

What about if it was, like, a giant squid, but it was fucking massive?

[Frank Alvarez]

You lose me. I'm not contributing to this conversation.

[Joey]

That would be so cool.

[Frank Alvarez]

That is. I'm not kidding. I am not. I really don't think I'm, like, afraid of much. Like. Much like, actual. Really, like, actual stuff. You're afraid of a lot. No, like, actual things. Like, I'm not afraid of, like, snakes or bugs or, you know, like, it's. It's theories that I'm afraid of.

[Joey]

You could do that all day.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but that. The ocean, like, the idea, like, we saw those videos, a giant squid, where it's just like a giant something under the ocean.

[Joey]

That wouldn't really scare me that much because, like, I'm not going out on the open ocean anyway.

[Frank Alvarez]

Fly over it.

[Joey]

Yeah, it's a squid.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, what if it. But what if it's a big one, dude? Yeah.

[Ant]

If a Kraken, let's say can is so big it could reach a plane, it's over anyway.

[Joey]

Yeah. I mean, they're not gonna pull it out of the sky.

[Frank Alvarez]

They might.

[Joey]

Something that big also is kind of like. They probably can't even see that. What are we doing?

[Frank Alvarez]

I like the thing so big, I probably can't even see the plane. Oh, man. It will never get the Delta flight.

[Joey]

I will say I'm not trying to, you know, shuttle over a Spirit because they've had a rough go, but those are bright yellow planes. The Kraken would see those. They would see the bright yellow ones.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right, we got to stop talking about planes. We're about to start flying soon.

[Joey]

I think we're safe from the kraken.

[Ant]

I think it's more likely. Maybe it'll throw a boat.

[Joey]

What about a Megalodon?

[Frank Alvarez]

That's cool.

[Joey]

Big fucking shark.

[Ant]

That's a big shark.

[Frank Alvarez]

Listen, when it comes to stuff under the water, because guess what? You look out, you see the ocean. You don't see underneath, but you don't.

[Joey]

Have to go in. You're protected by the land.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but why does that bother you? Because what if. If it, like, it, like, walk like, Cloverfield monster. A shark or a Cloverfield monster.

[Joey]

Oh, yeah, that's not good. I mean, we have. I mean, we shoot some rockets at.

[Frank Alvarez]

It or something, and then what? What happened to the Cloverfield monster?

[Joey]

I don't remember how that movie ended.

[Ant]

It wasn't great.

[Frank Alvarez]

I could spoil. That movie's incredible.

[Ant]

No, I'm saying spoilers 100 years old. I'm saying how it ended. It wasn't great.

[Frank Alvarez]

For counting.

[Joey]

Did they kill it? That feels like not a yes or no.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's a little stinger at the end where there's a little voice. Now it goes.

[Joey]

It's still alive. Oh, okay.

[Ant]

So they.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love Cloverfield so much. Don't even get me started on my Cloverfield.

[Joey]

I know you love that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love Cloverfield and then all the adjacent stuff. Most of the adjacent stuff stuff. Cloverfield Paradox. Big disappointment. 10 Cloverfield Lane.

[Joey]

Was that John Goodman? Yeah, that was a good one. That's a goodie. Yeah. Oh, I would like a bunker one day. That'd be fun.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, you're. You're. You're Big Billionaire Joe. You'll have one.

[Ant]

I think you get invited to one. I don't think you need to make one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, they don't want.

[Joey]

You don't need to make it.

[Frank Alvarez]

They'll just be like.

[Ant]

And that's the cool one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Come here. Come here.

[Ant]

You got a couple invites, though.

[Joey]

I'll tell you what, for a bunker invite, I might go to the Illuminati.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, okay.

[Ant]

All right, that's fair.

[Frank Alvarez]

They heard that them and the aliens. The aliens are getting ready to cream you, and the Illuminati is like, wait, us first?

[Ant]

I don't think you're making his plus one.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no, no. I would like to stay with my family.

[Joey]

Yeah, you got to go down the ship.

[Ant]

Well, you do.

[Frank Alvarez]

I will go down with this ship now. I.

[Joey]

I don't know that song. Oh, what's that?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't. I don't remember. I don't remember the name of it, but I remember the song.

[Ant]

You definitely know the song.

[Frank Alvarez]

That. Nor is that Fiona Apple?

[Ant]

Oh, I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

And I will go down with this.

[Joey]

Is that the name of the song? I mean, you can't play the song.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know, I know. You got it. But if you. If you look up the name of the song, just type, I will go down with this ship. Song Lady.

[Joey]

Song lady.

[Ant]

Ditto. White flag.

[Frank Alvarez]

Dido, Dido, Dido.

[Joey]

Who's Fiona Apple? Yeah. What was that? Is she.

[Frank Alvarez]

You remember Fiona Apple?

[Joey]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

She was a singer.

[Joey]

What is Fiona Apple?

[Frank Alvarez]

Sing top Fiona Apple songs.

[Ant]

Oh, criminal, I want you to love me. Pure imagination. Limp, Limp.

[Joey]

I don't know Fiona Apple. It does sound familiar. I thought it was like a cartoon character, though.

[Frank Alvarez]

Remember Nelly Furtado?

[Joey]

Hell, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Promiscuous. Girl, that's Timbaland. Well, but it's him and her. I know, but you did his voice.

[Joey]

Out of the song.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know. Promiscuous by don't be mad, don't be mean, don't be mad, don't be me.

[Joey]

Damn.

[Frank Alvarez]

Wow. I can see you with my T shirt on. I can see you with my T shirt.

[Joey]

Wait, she can see us with her teacher.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. I don't remember.

[Joey]

Yeah, I don't.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what I mean, Girl, I'm a fiction.

[Joey]

What was the song with Jessica Simpson? Oh, she's like, nothing but a T shirt on.

[Frank Alvarez]

Never felt so beautiful Maybe as I do now now that I'm with you.

[Joey]

I remember when that song came out, I was like, oh, that's the hottest thing a girl can wear.

[Frank Alvarez]

Of course you did.

[Joey]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I was. So who did more for like, like, that song? Or like, when Drake was just like, sweatpants, heads out, chilling with no makeup on? Yeah, that one was. Oh, my God, dude, I. Yeah, I do.

[Joey]

I do. Like a sweatpant look.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hair tied, chilling with no makeup on. That's when you're the prettiest. I hope that you don't take it wrong.

[Joey]

I don't know how that's taking it wrong, but I don't know why he said that. Anyway, we went all over the place today. Hope you guys enjoyed that.

[Frank Alvarez]

We started with Joey crying. We ended with Drake.

[Joey]

Right. So there you go. But, yeah, guys, go check out the Patreon. Patreon.com basementyard. And yeah, we have some shows, I guess, coming up. There might be a couple of tickets left to some certain places. So go check that out. The basement. Yard.com Frank, where can they find you?

[Frank Alvarez]

The Frank Alvarez everywhere. Make sure you go check out the Halloween merch. There's still some time to get some, I think, right? Yeah, yeah, I think sometime. So go check it out. And then the Patreon.

[Joey]

Patreon.com yard shop.santigottostudios.com to get that merch.

[Ant]

Ant and Aunt Prisco on Instagram.

[Frank Alvarez]

I wanted to see how fast you tried to say. I was.

[Joey]

I was.

[Ant]

I was just gonna bait.

[Frank Alvarez]

You gotta. You gotta faint a little bit.

[Ant]

Yeah, I fainted just in case you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Did it, you know?

[Joey]

Yeah, well, don't get used to it. And. All right. That is all for this week's episode. Thank you. See you next time.

[Frank Alvarez]

That.