The Basement Yard – Episode #528: "We Are The S*xiest Podcasters"

Podcast: The Basement Yard
Hosts: Joe Santagato & Frank Alvarez
Guest/Third Mic: Ant Prisco
Date: November 10, 2025

Episode Overview

In this lively and comedic episode, Joe, Frank, and Ant lean fully into the theme of being "the Sexiest Podcasters," reflecting on their recent People magazine accolade. The conversation swerves through trendy TikTok culture (the mysterious "Group 7"), new merchandise, the nature of sexiness and self-image, viral celebrity products, male grooming practices, and a playful but thoughtful debate about human emotions.

Key Discussion Points

1. The "Group 7" TikTok Phenomenon

[00:37–10:00]

• Joe and Frank are baffled by the mysterious “Group 7” TikTok trend, with Ant smugly gatekeeping what it means.
• Joyfully lampooning the concept, they compare it to old internet games and the feeling of exclusion.
• Ant claims, "If you don’t know what Group 7 is, you’re not Group 7." (01:18)
• The crew riffs on “group” status, creating alternative names like “zones” and “symbols”—“Zone Knife” gets some love.
• The bit devolves into mock accusations of exclusion and racism, poking fun at social media's algorithm-driven communities.

2. Basement Yard Merch & The Madison Square Garden Show

[10:00–12:30]

• They briefly break to showcase surprise jackets custom-made for the upcoming MSG show.
• Notable moment: Greg gifts the jackets in person; the hosts praise the quality and exclusivity.

“These jackets came out so good that I ordered 500 of them. They’re gonna be available at Madison Square Garden. First come, first serve. That’s it. 500. We’re never making these again.” – Joe (10:55)

3. Sexiest Podcasters: Humblebrags and Reflections

[12:30–15:00]

• The crew reflects on being named People Magazine’s Sexiest Podcasters of 2025, poking fun at the photo selection and the nature of such accolades.
• Joking claims about “sexy groups,” who did the “heavy lifting,” and the standards of sexiness in podcasting.

“You can take the people out of sexy. You can’t take the sexy out of people.” – Frank (13:44)

4. What Makes Someone Sexy? (And Can You Self-Sexy?)

[15:00–32:00]

• Spirited debate: Is feeling sexy something you can bestow upon yourself, or is it determined by others?
• Frank posits, “I don’t think sexy is something you can bestow upon yourself. Sexy is a gift.” (24:50)
• Joe and Ant challenge him—debating self-confidence, the difference between “looking good” and “feeling sexy,” and how social affirmation influences self-image.
• Hilarious riff on the metaphysical nature of “sexy”—Frank waxes poetic:

“Sexy is not tied to a physical plane of existence, but it is more a metaphysical, amoral amalgus...” (31:14)

• “Sexy” locations (hair, ass, chest)—“If sexy lives anywhere, it’s not in our stomach.” (30:33)

5. Sexuality, God, and Santa

[18:03–19:12]

• The crew riffs on who they need to be “sexy” for: God, Santa, partners—and which is most important.

6. Kourtney Kardashian’s “Vagina Lollipop” & Celebrity Health Trends

[37:34–45:35]

• The hosts fall for viral clickbait, initially believing Kourtney Kardashian’s new lollipop product is meant for internal “hoo ha” use.
• Ant: “You know the lollipops aren’t being shoved in anything, right?” (40:00)
• Frank: “That’s a rare business blunder by the Kardashian clan.” (40:22)
• Once corrected, they analyze the real purpose (just a vitamin lollipop), the price point ($5.99 for five at Target), and what it allegedly does for “vaginal health.”
• Discussion of celebrity health products’ real efficacy and the marketing genius behind these viral items.

7. The Return of the Bush: Male Grooming, Shaving Practices & Trends

[48:53–53:32]

• The hosts reminisce and debate about the prominence of pubic hair (“the bush”), trends through the decades, and their own shaving routines.
• Ant stuns Joe and Frank with his “dry shaving” method—no cream, no water.

Frank: “You’re shaving your man bush, your mush, with just a dry razor. It doesn’t pull? Who are you? Are you slick?” (51:59)

• They debate clean-shaven faces, mustaches, and beard envy, with playful ribbing about what they'd look like clean-shaven (“serial killer” references abound).

8. Best Emotion to Erase from Existence?

[64:09–71:56]

• Listener question: If you could erase one emotion from the world, which would it be?
• Personal angle: Frank chooses “anger,” but globally says “envy” is most destructive.
  • "Envy feels like it has more malice with it... I want it, I'm going for it." – Frank (67:15)
• In-depth, comedic debate about jealousy, anxiety (“you need it, I saw Inside Out 2”), contentment, disgust, and surprise.
• How “envy” stands apart from “jealousy” and why, if removed, it might benefit humanity.
• Trivia about the voice cast of Inside Out 2, musings on stalkers and obsessive love.

9. Cultural Tastes & Trying New Foods

[73:44–74:48]

• Ant reveals a surprisingly adventurous palate, but recoils at the idea of fish that “look like a fish.”
• Joe and Frank probe for his culinary limits, but Ant insists he’ll “try anything once.”

10. End of Show: Self-Promotion & Playful Banter

[75:01–75:31]

• The usual plugs for their social accounts and Patreon, with the trio joking about their dynamic and roles.
• Playful complaints about getting cut off or not having enough time to do their own plugs.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Group 7:
  “If you don’t know what group seven is, you’re not group seven.” – Ant (01:18)
  "You're talking more than both of us... it's not really giving group seven, but that's neither here nor there." – Joe (09:43)
• On Being Sexiest Podcasters:
  “People have spoken. Our fans are fervent.” – Frank (13:50)
  “I just think we’re sexy because we’re willing to love. ... Because we’re not that smart.” – Frank (14:44/14:49)
• On “Sexy” as a Gift:
  “I don’t think sexy is something you can bestow upon yourself. Sexy is a gift.” – Frank (24:50)
• On Marketing Trends:
  “If I had a puss and I could eat a lollipop and make my shit taste like pineapple, I’m paying $30 for five lollipops.” – Joe (45:16)
• On Grooming:
  “You’re basically shaving your man bush ... with just a dry razor. ... Who are you? Are you slick?” – Frank (51:59)
• On Emotions:
  “Envy feels like it has more malice with it. ... Envy’s like, I want it. I’m going for it.” – Frank (67:15)
• On Being Unapologetically Themselves:
  “That’s what makes us so sexy: idiots.” – Joe (41:01)

Key Timestamps for Important Segments

• 00:37–04:09: Group 7 TikTok confusion and gatekeeping
• 10:00–12:30: MSG show jackets reveal
• 12:30–16:00: Sexiest Podcasters recognition and the nature of “sexy"
• 24:50–32:00: Can you “self-sexy”? Frank’s metaphysical musing
• 40:00–41:00: Kourtney Kardashian’s “vagina lollipop” revelation (“not for insertion” realization)
• 48:53–53:32: Grooming confessions: dry shaving and pubic trends
• 64:09–71:56: Emotional world-building: which emotion goes?
• 73:44–74:48: Food aversions and trying new things

Tone & Style

• Highly comedic, self-deprecating, with signature fast-paced banter and riffing.
• Playful debates about shallow (and deep) topics, layered with absurd humor and occasional heartfelt moments.
• Spontaneous, irreverent, but always anchored by the chemistry of real-life friends.

Final Thoughts for Listeners

Even without listening, this episode brings all the classic Basement Yard energy—smart-dumb musings on life, internet culture, and what it means to be labeled "sexy." If you want to know how Instagram trends, self-image, and dry-shaving pubes intersect, you’re in the right basement!