#550 - We Are Podcastmaxxing

Summary

The Basement Yard #550 – We Are Podcastmaxxing
April 13, 2026
Hosts: Joe Santagato, Frank Alvarez
Guest: Ant Prisco

Episode Overview

On this episode of The Basement Yard, Joe, Frank, and returning guest Ant Prisco dive deep into the world of “maxxing”—from the internet’s latest “___maxxing” memes to jawline culture and social etiquette about gifts, paying bills, and desserts. The conversation ricochets between their signature wisecracks, nostalgia for childhood snacks, boner chocolate, and “horny maxxing.” Against the backdrop of Easter season and the annual candy indulgence, the guys unpack viral internet culture, recall cringe middle school flexes, and skewer everything from etiquette debates to giant Costco bunnies.

This is a fun, fast-paced conversation that delivers laughs, sharp banter, and a look at how online slang is shaping the way guys talk about self-improvement, masculinity, and everything in between.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Maxxing: Internet Lingo Goes Mainstream (17:00–24:00)

• The guys riff on the rise of "maxxing" phrases—looksmaxxing, jawmaxxing, podcastmaxxing, jestermaxxing—and marvel at the constant evolution of online slang.
• Frank: “I saw a tweet the other day... This sentence would kill someone in the Victorian era!” (17:50)
• Joe: Explains that “mogging” is when someone outshines someone else—e.g., "Frank's mogging Joe."
• The trio joke about their own podcast being an exercise in “podcastmaxxing,” with mock-competitive spins on who’s “frame maxxing” or “bank account maxxing.”

2. The Jaw Maxxing & Looksmaxxing Subcultures (18:12–24:30)

• Frank introduces the viral “jawmaxxing” trend—people attempting to enhance their jawlines via unconventional and sometimes dangerous methods (hammering cheeks, chewing extra-hard gum).
• Ant: “Is this real? This guy’s jaw is big. All right, I got one.” (21:08)
• Joe: Skeptical but amused, asks if this is surgery or just “strong gum guy.”
• The hosts marvel at the maximalist attitude, joking about “never skipping jaw day.”

3. Social Etiquette: Gifting, Paying Bills, & Winnings (09:41–16:30)

• Spirited debate about scratch-off lottery tickets as gifts, and what you owe the giver if you win big.
• Frank: “Just to be a better person than Joe, I’d give him a little.” (10:19)
• The group improvises a funny roleplay about giving an ice cream man a winning ticket (11:03–12:16).
• They also touch lightly on the etiquette of paying at dinners, generational expectations, and whether it’s “disrespectful” for a younger person to pick up the tab in a family context.
• Tony Soprano reference: “It’s like the scene in The Sopranos where Meadow’s boyfriend, like, pays for dinner and Tony... ‘Listen, you fuck…’” (15:19)

4. Salad Talk & Childhood Candy (02:51–07:08)

• Frank and Joe debate the merits of Caesar salad (bagged vs. fresh vs. restaurant-made), and the conversation drifts into salad spinning, washing fruit, and the “good” vs. “bad” lettuces—kale, spinach, arugula, butter lettuce.
• Frank: “Who the fuck does spinach think it is? Spinach can kiss my ass.” (05:43)
• The trio laugh about food quirks, culminating in whether fruit/greens preparation is just “too much work to be healthy.”

5. Boner Chocolate, Aphrodisiacs, and Food-Driven Horniness (28:53–50:00)

• Joe tells the story of a chocolate recall due to Viagra content, spurring a tangent on “boner chocolate” and the mechanics of aphrodisiacs.
• Frank: “Imagine eating chocolate and you’re just hard as a demon.” (31:32)
• They Google the recall story and find it was boner chocolate all along—no accident.
• The group riffs on whether certain foods have ever made them “horny,” what proper “sexy desserts” would be, and the importance of spoons over forks for “spoon sexiness.” (50:15)
• Hilarious tangent on a middle-school friend who watched porn and ate Zeppoles daily after school—“That kid’s a nut job, dude... That’s crazy.” (40:07)

6. The 10-Pound Costco Chocolate Bunny (59:29–66:49)

• The team examines the viral $140, 10-pound Costco chocolate bunny—a symbol of American excess.
• Calorie calculations: Ant reveals it has 22,650 calories (62:39), leading to disbelief and jokes about how many children you’d need at a party to finish it.
• Debate on whether it’s hollow or solid, and various ways one might attempt to eat or “break” the bunny for fun (sauna/chocolate bath jokes).
• Frank: “This is what everyone believes America is... everything’s bigger and it’s all chocolate and it’s sugar.” (69:02)

7. Throwback Snacks & Nostalgia (77:38–81:52)

• Reminiscing about childhood snacks like Kudos bars, Cosmic Brownies, Little Bites, and “fluff”—marshmallow spread.
• Frank: Admits to “fluff maxxing” to impress a middle school crush (“Did it work?” — “No.” 72:30).
• Debate over the best flavor of freezer ice pops (“The pink is the best one!” 81:34).
• Frank laments the “sadness” of the giant bunny as a symbol, while appreciating holiday treats like Peeps and Starburst jellybeans.

8. Banter, Meme Culture, and “Gotcha” Moments (75:13–77:31)

• Frank sets up and delivers a classic “Wendy’s nuts got dragged across your face” joke, delighting in the slow build-up and “Gotham” callback, a running in-joke on the podcast.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Maxxing Language:

• “Things are being said that have never been said before.” – Joe (18:12)
• “Jester maxing describes behaving overly funny, entertaining, or foolish to attract attention from women and friends.” – Ant (24:07)
• “We are podcast maxing.” – Joe (22:47)

On Food & Candy:

• “Who the fuck does spinach think it is? Spinach can kiss my ass.” – Frank (05:43)
• “Once I start popping [Cadbury Eggs], I’m Little... I was horny max, bro. I was horny maxing. We all were.” – Joe (36:04, 36:25)
• “That’s almost two weeks of food. Why don’t we just not…” – Joe, re: the 22,000 calorie bunny (63:08)

On Etiquette & Gifting:

• “Just to be a better person than Joe, I’d give him a little.” – Frank (10:19)
• [On paying for dinner]: “The last thing I want right now is to have this argument where it’s like who’s nicer... I would like to pay for my end.” – Joe (14:33)

Misc Moments:

• “Imagine eating chocolate and you’re just hard as a demon.” – Frank (31:32)
• “Do they make lady boner pills? I guess it’s just... I don’t know.” – Ant (52:05)
• “If at any point we get to a place in the world where we can actually... go back in time and ask our younger selves anything, that would be the greatest episode of a podcast ever.” – Joe (54:08)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Salad & Candy Season Banter: 00:53–07:08
• Gifting Ice Cream Man & Teacher Gifts: 07:11–09:48
• Ethics of Lottery Winnings/Paying Dinners: 09:41–16:30
• Sopranos & Old-School Bill Etiquette: 15:19–16:51
• Maxxing Vocabulary & Meme Dissection: 17:00–24:33
• Jawline Culture/Jaw Maxxing: 18:12–22:32
• Jester Maxxing Definition: 24:07–24:21
• Boner Chocolate Recall Story: 28:53–32:57
• Sexy Food/Aphrodisiac Conversation: 49:47–51:19
• Giant 10-Pound Bunny Segment: 59:29–66:49
• Wendy’s “Gotcha” Joke Setup & Execution: 75:13–77:04
• Nostalgic Snacks/Ice Pops: 77:38–81:52

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Tone & Style

The episode brims with irreverent humor, running inside jokes, and the friends’ effortless chemistry. The hosts oscillate between affectionate ragging, semi-serious cultural commentary, raunchy asides, and extended riffs on viral trends. It's playful, fast, and at times delightfully absurd, perfect for fans who love when The Basement Yard swerves from “deep” to “dumb” in half a breath.

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Summary by The Basement Yard Podcast Summarizer (Podcastmaxxed, of course)

Transcript

[Joe Sanigal]

This episode is brought to you by Nordstrom.

[Frank Alvarez]

Spring calls for a wardrobe refresh, and Nordstrom has the best styles of the season.

[Joe Sanigal]

From dresses and denim to standout tops and accessories, find the trends and essentials that feel right for you. Discover new arrivals from brands you love, like Waif, Princess, Polly, Mango, Adidas and free people. Plus free shipping and returns and free styling appointments.

[Frank Alvarez]

Make everything so easy. Shop in [e-mail] or download the Nordstrom app. Welcome back to the basement.

[Joe Sanigal]

Welcome back to the basement yard. Frank, how are you doing?

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm doing well. How are you doing?

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm doing great. And why don't you wear some more stuff and plug your own podcast?

[Frank Alvarez]

It's getting ridiculous. This guy is fucking crazy. Getting crazy. It is, right?

[Joe Sanigal]

It's getting crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just like the product placement this guy giving away. He's giving away free plugs on a show that's not fucking his.

[Ant Prisco]

I don't know which one you're talking about. What's the name of it?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

I like that hat, though. I like that a lot. That's really nice. That's it? That's all you're getting?

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, I'm. I don't. It's enough for me.

[Joe Sanigal]

I will say, those candies that you're wearing, love them. Yeah. You don't like them?

[Frank Alvarez]

God, those suck. Those are one of the worst all time candies. And we're. We are in a great candy season. We are in a great candy season.

[Joe Sanigal]

Easter. Our Lord. And. And he came back.

[Frank Alvarez]

He. He are risen.

[Joe Sanigal]

What is it is Frank?

[Frank Alvarez]

He is risen.

[Joe Sanigal]

He. He is risen.

[Frank Alvarez]

He. He.

[Joe Sanigal]

He did rise.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't see, like, that's why I don't like old timey English because it's not good. Like, they were all like, he has risen. Yeah, that's what I would say if I were. But he. He is like a capital H. I know, I know.

[Joe Sanigal]

So if it's like, you know.

[Frank Alvarez]

But that's not the part of it that bothers me. It's the. Is risen.

[Joe Sanigal]

But so has risen.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, he has risen. He's gonna be rising.

[Joe Sanigal]

The Bible's like, yo, he. He has been. He's. What did you say?

[Frank Alvarez]

He's gonna be rising.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's gonna be rising.

[Frank Alvarez]

I wonder.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's gonna be rising.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know that they make like, Miles has a Bible that's like a graphic novel comic book and it's called, like the action Bible. I wonder if, like, someone would, like, take the Bible and like, translate it into, like, modern lingo.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm sure.

[Frank Alvarez]

And it's like the apostles are like, this is giving resurrection, right? Yeah, funny.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's giving leprosy.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is this. Oh, my. This is giving frankincense.

[Joe Sanigal]

Pontious Pilot is like, giving mean girl right now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I don't like Brutus. Was that the one? No, that was Caesar.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm not.

[Frank Alvarez]

Who's the one that, like, went against Judas? Judas. Judas, Brutus.

[Joe Sanigal]

And Caesar wasn't Caesar, like. Yeah, that was a different. That was Rome, wasn't it?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I think so. And a salad.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Where are you on Caesar salad?

[Joe Sanigal]

I like Caesar salad, but I think that people, when they have, like, their first Caesar salad, they go down a rabbit hole. Like, people, when they try sushi salad for the first time, they're like, oh, my God, this is the greatest thing. And then everything like, Caesar salad wraps, bro. They're good, but everyone chill. It's like drugs for people.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I do think that we're getting away from, like, the point of Caesar. Like, Caesar needs to be a salad dressing. And, like, I don't want this, like, bagged. I want it, like real Caesar. You know what I mean?

[Joe Sanigal]

Bagged?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Like pre made Caesar.

[Joe Sanigal]

Have you seen.

[Frank Alvarez]

Have you seen those, like, the, like, people at the restaurants making it with, like, just two spoons?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Whoa.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. I went to a restaurant, I got the Caesar, and then they, like, take a little anchovy and they crush it up and they like, that's the only

[Frank Alvarez]

place that I'm, like, cool with mustard, knowing that it's there. You know what I mean?

[Joe Sanigal]

In a seas.

[Frank Alvarez]

In a Caesar. Like, I know mustard's in there, and I'm like, I'll allow it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. You like Caesar salad wraps?

[Ant Prisco]

Chicken Caesar salad wrap? Sure. What I was gonna say is, isn't it weird? What's the lettuce where they kind of just put a head of lettuce on it on the plate, like a wedge.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like a wedge salad.

[Ant Prisco]

Not weird.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love lettuce. You're never gonna get an argument with me about lettuce.

[Joe Sanigal]

I like it too, because they. You kind of like. It's like a boat. It, like, fills it. What's the red ones? Undives. Endives.

[Frank Alvarez]

Endives, I believe. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Those are good because they usually pack those.

[Frank Alvarez]

I like. Well, I like when it comes in, like, the, like, romaine and you could, like, peel it, and it's like, you can make, like, a lettuce wrap with it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's cool. I like when it helps me eat, not when I Need to, like, do the work for it.

[Joe Sanigal]

I like when it's like a. Like a shovel that I could, like, shovel in my face.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do like that.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I like. Caesar salad's great. It's a great salad.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what is weird? You've had butter lettuce. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

What is that?

[Frank Alvarez]

It's like. It looks like a full head of lettuce, but there's, like, eight leaves in it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And then they're just, like, super crunchy. I want all the leaves all the time. I can eat a whole head of lettuce at will.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm an arugula groupie. Like, I'm into it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Arugula is such an underrated form of greenery.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, dude, it really is kale. Kale's kind of.

[Frank Alvarez]

Here's the thing with kale. It holds dressing well. It's pretentious to me because it got, like. It gots, like, little nooks and crannies in there where it'll, like, just hold a little bit.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. It's a very outdoorsy looking lettuce.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, it looks like this.

[Joe Sanigal]

You got this from outside.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm sure it is.

[Joe Sanigal]

You did, but, like, you know what I mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm sure it is healthy for you, but, like, it seems like it's the type of lettuce or it's not lettuce. It's the type of greenery that, like, you have it to, like, appear more healthy. You know what I mean? It's the caviar.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, you don't know what you're doing. You're just eating kale because you're told it's the best. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, this isn't like a kale salad. No, not for me.

[Frank Alvarez]

Too much.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's like having a bowl of kale caviar. Like, you're not gonna. This is like a little.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's got to be mixed in with other.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'll tell you who is a pretentious bastard. Who the does spinach think it is? Spinach can kiss my ass.

[Joe Sanigal]

Whoa. I feel like I kind of like spinach.

[Frank Alvarez]

I like it, but, like, not to the point where everyone's just like, oh, my God, spinach.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's just like, in everything. They kind of like, throw it in your. I don't mind it. I don't like when it gets. When they start all bunching up in my wrap and then I take a bite and I'm like, I mean, just spinach now.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I had great salads in my life. I've never made a Great salad. Because all my stuff gets to the bottom and then I have to like,

[Joe Sanigal]

yeah, I gotta do this thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

I gotta. Yeah. And I can't do that. I gotta like fluffily like air it up, you know, I don't, I don't like it. It's too much work to be healthy.

[Joe Sanigal]

Have you ever used one of those fucking salad things where you just crank it?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I don't have the crank. I have the button.

[Joe Sanigal]

Those are cool too.

[Frank Alvarez]

My mom has that and I'm like, oh.

[Joe Sanigal]

And it's being in that bunch, like the crank. And I'm like, yo, there, there's a lot of G in here. Like there's a lot of G force.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I'm there for the GS. I like doing that too. With like when I wash fruit and then I take cuz it has like the removable strainer and then I look at all that dirty water down there and I look at the fruit and I was like, look what you did, you little pig.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, that's a. Whoa. And then. But also like that makes you feel good because you're like, I could have eaten that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Which I don't really care much about. Like, yeah, I'm not like hyper intense.

[Joe Sanigal]

If you're eating fruit, you're eating bugs, swear and germs.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, I think that the good parts of whatever you're eating are gonna outweigh the bad parts that are on it sometimes.

[Ant Prisco]

What's the worst thing you've found in your food?

[Joe Sanigal]

I haven't really like found anything like too insane. Yeah.

[Ant Prisco]

Ever bit an apple? Find a worm?

[Joe Sanigal]

No, no.

[Frank Alvarez]

That only happens in like Disney movies from the 40s. I don't think that's ever been a real thing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Or like an apple on a teacher's desk. It's like a fucking bro.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was a teacher and a kid was just like, I like you, here's an apple. I'm fucking smacking that apple. And then I'm gonna yell at. I'm not going to hit him.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I'd be like, yo, I'm not eating your. Who the are you? I'm not eating this.

[Frank Alvarez]

How many times have you gifted a mug to a teacher?

[Joe Sanigal]

Once, I think maybe, I don't know. You were big on the that. I don't know if I even got my teacher. What are you talking about?

[Frank Alvarez]

My mom was like, boys with all of my teachers.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, she was like part of the staff.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. So like I had to. Around Christmas time, it was like, you need to get gifts for all your Teachers. So. So they got mugs like the ones that they sell at like Starbucks that come already wrapped with like a gift card in it and then like a bag of instant coffee or some shit.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I did that for the ice cream man once.

[Frank Alvarez]

What?

[Joe Sanigal]

It wasn't my idea.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hold on.

[Joe Sanigal]

It wasn't my idea.

[Frank Alvarez]

So you won't give gifts to your teacher, who arguably has more of an impact on your life, but you will to the ice cream guy? That was. Yeah, he got in trouble.

[Joe Sanigal]

What did he, what did he do?

[Frank Alvarez]

He didn't hear about this.

[Joe Sanigal]

You're making this up.

[Frank Alvarez]

I swear.

[Joe Sanigal]

What happened to him?

[Frank Alvarez]

He got in trouble for like, for what?

[Joe Sanigal]

Children?

[Frank Alvarez]

No.

[Joe Sanigal]

How am I supposed to guess then? Stabbing?

[Frank Alvarez]

No, that's. You think I stabbed like that?

[Joe Sanigal]

I thought you had a knife and you stabbed someone.

[Ant Prisco]

Is that drugs?

[Frank Alvarez]

The rumor was drugs, yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, whatever. That's fine. I mean, as long as it's. No, it ain't. Well, to children or to other.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know who it was to or if it's even true, but I'm going to take it as it's real.

[Joe Sanigal]

Get it how you live it. I mean, I, I understand drugs are bad, but as long as you're not selling to children or you're not stabbing anyone. Not that, that. You know, I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. I was forced to just give me my great white shark. I don't want some of that great white. You know what I'm saying?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yes. My dad made me do it.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's. I swear to God. If you had asked me to pick between your two parents, I would have said your father 50%. Of course.

[Joe Sanigal]

Of course.

[Frank Alvarez]

My.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't even know if my mom ever like met this guy. My dad knew everyone in the neighborhood. For some reason.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was like, oh, go, go do something nice for him.

[Joe Sanigal]

You know what I got. I don't know what the, the, what the actual like gift was, but I do know there was scratch off tickets in it.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's such a popular gift around the holidays. Just like buy 10 scratch offs and just give one to someone because it could be either a meaningless gift or a $30,000 gift.

[Joe Sanigal]

I honestly hate it as a gift.

[Ant Prisco]

If you give somebody a scratch off and they win a million. Are you.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't think any scratch offs can win you a million.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, there are if it's a 20

[Ant Prisco]

buck one or something, probably. I don't know.

[Joe Sanigal]

But regardless, I'm saying no.

[Ant Prisco]

A hundred thousand.

[Joe Sanigal]

No.

[Ant Prisco]

A hundred thousand. Would you be. Would you Not a little bit of you.

[Joe Sanigal]

No, no.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is an age old question. Because it'll be like I buy you a Powerball ticket and you win 35 million. How much you giving me? We've talked about this.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's different.

[Ant Prisco]

No, that's. That's different. That's not what I'm scratch off.

[Frank Alvarez]

But I get it as a gift.

[Ant Prisco]

Like. Like Merry Christmas.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. No, you can't. You can't.

[Ant Prisco]

And then you win 100,000.

[Frank Alvarez]

I just to be.

[Ant Prisco]

Next time I saw you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just to be a better person than Joe, I'd give him a little.

[Joe Sanigal]

A little something I would do. I wouldn't give them like a fixed amount, but I would be like. Like, you know, like a dinner or something. Like, like something really nice. Like a. Like a. Like an elevated version of whatever.

[Frank Alvarez]

Are you telling them that you won the money?

[Joe Sanigal]

You're saying that I win the hundred thousand?

[Ant Prisco]

All right, I was saying somebody else.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right.

[Joe Sanigal]

I would not expect anything.

[Frank Alvarez]

Here we go. Here we go. Here we go. Hey, we're acting. Yeah. Acting yard. Welcome back.

[Ant Prisco]

Oh, action.

[Frank Alvarez]

Merry Christmas. I got you this scratch off. Yeah, just a little something, you know. Thank you for all the ice creams you've delivered to my kids.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, I'm not an ice cream guy.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

So that's for you. Just best of luck.

[Joe Sanigal]

Haha. Oh my God. I won a hundred thousand dollars on this. Wow.

[Frank Alvarez]

Wow.

[Joe Sanigal]

Did you? Thank you so much.

[Frank Alvarez]

No problem, man. How. Let me see that. How did you win that? Wow.

[Joe Sanigal]

$100,000. Hundred thousand big ones.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's bing bang, boom. That's so cool.

[Joe Sanigal]

Fuck ice cream. You know what I'm saying?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, with you're retiring.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's a hundred thousand dollars. What year is this?

[Joe Sanigal]

95.

[Frank Alvarez]

Not enough. Right. That's so. I'm so happy for you.

[Joe Sanigal]

I would thank you so much for. This is unbelievable. I gotta give you something. I gotta give you something.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I gotta.

[Joe Sanigal]

Dude, I gotta give. Change my life.

[Frank Alvarez]

You don't need to do that.

[Joe Sanigal]

You don't need to. At least let me take you to dinner.

[Frank Alvarez]

Where at?

[Joe Sanigal]

Whatever you want.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right.

[Joe Sanigal]

I know. I know this really nice restaurant. Yeah, it's really nice. What's your favorite cuisine?

[Frank Alvarez]

Wine. Oh, they have a good wine list.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yep.

[Frank Alvarez]

Sweet. And scene. We crush that acting.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's what I'm saying. So you got to offer back.

[Frank Alvarez]

I gotta get you something like.

[Joe Sanigal]

No. He's like, at least let me take you to dinner. Now you're in the clear.

[Frank Alvarez]

But, but here's the thing. At what point Is the. No. Do you say like, okay. Cause I know you as an individual. If this were actually happening and I were to say no, you'd be like, okay after the first time.

[Joe Sanigal]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

No, I would not.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Because yes, you've. I think you're kind of. What are you, what are you basing that on? Because you're the type of person, you've openly spoken about this. That like, if someone like, if there's like one thing of food left, if there's one mozzarella stick left, you'll be like, anyone want it? No. No.

[Joe Sanigal]

You'll just go, okay, Frank, we're equating mozzarella sticks to $100,000 that I got from a gift.

[Frank Alvarez]

I see a very clear parallel between the two.

[Joe Sanigal]

Okay, you're ignoring nuance here. You think that I would be like, let me give you something. You go, no, okay, and I'm out

[Frank Alvarez]

and I'll just walk down the street. I think you are more inclined than I am.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's bananas.

[Frank Alvarez]

That you would think, think that I would sneak the money into your like. And you'd be like, no, and I'd sneak it into your, your, your pocket or something.

[Joe Sanigal]

I will go on record and say that, like, if someone is offering me money and I am telling them no, I would be offended if you snuck it on me. I'd be like, get this the off me.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, see.

[Joe Sanigal]

Cuz I'm.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think it's just like a little playful thing back and forth where it's like, no. Yes. But I also not like that with

[Joe Sanigal]

like the bills with dinner or whatever. If I'm out with people and I would like, I, I usually if I want to pay, I will wait until like before the check comes because I don't want to deal with it like in the moment. I don't want to put pressure on anyone. But I'll say to people, like, I would really like to pay for this, if that's okay with you guys. Because if there's like, you know, whatever, then we can kind of settle that. Whatever. If people are, are like, I want to pay, and I'm like, it's. Or, or if they say that one time, then I will let that go. Because that's different than like, oh, are you sure? No, you don't have to. But if they're like, no, I really, I would like to pay for this as well. I'd be like, okay, no problem. Because I'm not trying to fight. You know what I mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, but I would definitely offer fight. It's Just a little back and forth.

[Joe Sanigal]

But I also know that if I'm in that position, and I say that because if someone's like, oh, you know, we want to pay for dinner, I'd be like, oh, my God, thank you so much. Like, I appreciate that, because I know that I will pay it forward at some point or whatever. But if I'm like, no, no, no. Like, I. I would like to pay for that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I.

[Joe Sanigal]

The last thing I want right now is to have this argument where it's like, who's nicer than blah, blah, blah? Because it's not even a matter of that. I would like to pay for my end.

[Frank Alvarez]

You think someone would be trying to, like, big dog you if they just pay and don't tell you? And they're just like, now you're my

[Joe Sanigal]

first of all at a restaurant. Big dog me. I don't care if I'm at a restaurant and someone's like, I'd like to pay for this. I. I would be. And if someone that I know, I. This happened to me recently where I went out to dinner with people, I was fully, like, expecting to pay, but they ended up paying. And, like, their wife was there and, you know, someone else was there, and they were like, oh, like, I'm gonna handle it. Don't worry about it. I was like, all right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, no problem.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, I'll just get the next one

[Frank Alvarez]

type of thing, but I'll remember that.

[Joe Sanigal]

So, like, the next time I'm not dealing with this shit. Two in a row not doing this.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's like the scene in the Sopranos where Meadow's boyfriend, like, pays for dinner and Tony and she's like, oh, no. He's like, listen, you fuck. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

And he's like, you fucking. When you have your own family, how would you.

[Frank Alvarez]

How would you deal with that?

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, I'd be okay with it.

[Ant Prisco]

I don't get the. Even in that scene. It's just a disrespect thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Ant Prisco]

It's like, how is it?

[Frank Alvarez]

It's like I'm the one that, you know, Like, I'm the one that's the head of house. I'm the head of the household. Like, that's back when I think now, obviously, it's a very different time than it was when they. Whenever they made that show in the 90s.

[Joe Sanigal]

If I went out with my daughter and her new boyfriend and he paid for the bill without me knowing, I would think that he's doing a nice thing. But I also would probably explain that, like, you don't like, you don't need to do that. And also like you're a kid. Like they were like in college. It's like you're not paying for the dinner.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I think, I think it'd be like, I appreciate this. Never do this again. And then I'd flash a gun in their face.

[Ant Prisco]

Tony over there.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, thank you. I don't know about that one.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, you're a little like old school. Not a little. I think you're very old school. You're traditional in a lot.

[Frank Alvarez]

In what way?

[Joe Sanigal]

Like in ways like that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm fully joking. Like I. Anytime I've been out to dinner with my father in law, I don't let him pay. You know what, you're an adult.

[Joe Sanigal]

You don't let him pay.

[Frank Alvarez]

You say, yeah, like I'm like, I'm going to get this. Like, please. And I mean there have been times where like. But like I always like, listen, please let me do this. Like, yeah, but I don't, I don't think I'm pretty. I'm pretty new wave.

[Joe Sanigal]

See what I mean? Pretty new wave.

[Ant Prisco]

I'm pretty hip.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm pretty hip.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm pretty up to it. It is gonna be really interesting to see like when our kids are, you know, at dating age, what like the things to do or not do are, you know, because those things are evolving. Like if you had told our parents generation that like, you know, the son will pay for dinner. They have the Tony Soprano reaction. You know what I mean? So like I wonder what it will be like, how like the cultural norms will shift when they're of dating age.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, now we know they've shifted and it's like if you're a guy and you pay for on the first date, you're a. Or something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, you're a little simple. Simp cuck, beta soy boy and a democrat and yeah, cuck soy boy, Democrat lib.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, she. She's free food maxing you.

[Joe Sanigal]

Free food maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Jester maxing. Free food maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

You're gesture maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Pocket maxing with pocket Max. I can't, I can't even keep up with all this. I saw a tweet the other day that was just like clavicular. Jester maxed after and someone like retweeted it and said like, yo. Things are being said that have never been said. Like this sentence would kill someone in the Victorian era.

[Joe Sanigal]

Things are being said that have never been said before.

[Frank Alvarez]

What is jester maxing, bro?

[Joe Sanigal]

You're. I mean, I'm Too old. I don't.

[Ant Prisco]

I don't even know that one. It's just. Anything maxing is something you're doing better.

[Joe Sanigal]

I do think it's funny.

[Ant Prisco]

I think it's hilarious.

[Joe Sanigal]

I think the maxing shit is hilarious.

[Frank Alvarez]

And, like, what is this whole shit with, like, jaw muscles?

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, I mean, strong.

[Frank Alvarez]

The looks.

[Joe Sanigal]

Maxing thing is, like, now becoming, like, a thing where, like, that kid that you're talking about, like, he would hit his cheek with a hammer so that it would, like. The idea is that you would break the bones and they'd grow back and be stronger and you have, like, better cheekbones. So it's all about, like, why to be, like, more symmetrical.

[Frank Alvarez]

Look like Gaston.

[Joe Sanigal]

Classically, it's a bad example.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gaston was ripped or traditionally attractive. But who Pull up the picture of the guy I'm talking about, like, who would find that, like. I don't know who, but the kid that chews strong gum.

[Joe Sanigal]

Who the is that?

[Ant Prisco]

Oh, you're talking about the kid with, like, the jaws like that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, I don't know who you're talking about.

[Frank Alvarez]

You've never seen this dude? I saw. I saw it on, like, Instagram, like, World Star posted it or something, and I was just like, this is crazy.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's got, like, balls over.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, you know how, like, when you're sitting and this is the only time I've done it, but, like, when you're getting a haircut and you're getting, like, a shave and you look and you do this. You know what I'm talking about?

[Joe Sanigal]

You, like, clench your jaw.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. But you, like, pop it out to see. Like, maybe I got. I put on a little bit of weight, so maybe it's not looking like it did when I was 18 years old.

[Joe Sanigal]

I can see your head move. But you have a beard, so I can't really.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I guess so. But, like, apparently this dude, like, chews strong gum.

[Joe Sanigal]

Strong gum?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, yeah, it's, like, real sticky. Like, workout gum. Not even sticky, but, like, you remember.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, do you remember the Jaws are size?

[Frank Alvarez]

I was.

[Joe Sanigal]

No, it was called, like, Jaws or Size. It's like a thing you put your mouth and you, like, chew and it, like, supposed to work out this, like, muscle or something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why were you working out that muscle, Joey?

[Joe Sanigal]

It was a commercial. I didn't buy it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know about that there.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's a commercial.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was gonna say, like, you know, like, the gumballs that come in, like, the ice pops when we were kids, and like, after, like, three minutes of chewing they basically became, like, chewing on dust. Not dust. It was like industrial grade rubber.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, it became, like, super intense.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

So, like, this kid chews on that and has a jaw that, like. It looked like if you put those chairs on either side of my face, he's looks maxing. Looks maxing. Jaw maxing. Simp maxing, Simp maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's a big one.

[Ant Prisco]

I'm sure trying to find a good picture of him. This is. Is this real? This guy's jaw's big. All right, I got one.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, you said that.

[Frank Alvarez]

You said that kind of sexually, I'm

[Joe Sanigal]

not going to body shame, but I'm not body shaming.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm body looking at and being like, all right, just with this kid.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, I also. I don't know who this. Okay. It's just a big.

[Ant Prisco]

It's a big jaw.

[Frank Alvarez]

Never skip jaw day. Is this a yo, by the way, one?

[Joe Sanigal]

Is this real?

[Ant Prisco]

I don't.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

And.

[Joe Sanigal]

Or is it cosmetic surgery?

[Frank Alvarez]

It could be. I don't know. And just like, a classic American. I'm not gonna go and figure it out.

[Joe Sanigal]

This is the strong gum guy.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is the strong gum kid. There's, like, videos of him, like, talking and, like, the dude's got a strong jaw.

[Joe Sanigal]

Is he American?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know.

[Joe Sanigal]

You heard him talking?

[Frank Alvarez]

No, like, it's like, with music and, like. And he's got, like, muscular jaw, dude.

[Joe Sanigal]

Very interesting. Or maybe he's got the stuff that Marlon Brando had in the Godfather.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but that was down here.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, but he's got it stuffed in the back.

[Frank Alvarez]

So this is. This is jaw maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, this is jaw maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

If you were say you were good at maxing one thing, what would it be?

[Joe Sanigal]

It's a great question. What am I good at maxing? I don't know. You know, maybe nothing maxed out. I don't know. Whoa, what am I looking at here?

[Ant Prisco]

I got him.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why does he got a strong gum? Look at that. Dude.

[Joe Sanigal]

Is that. No, no, no. Wow, that looks. I guess that is real.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, I mean, it looks real.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, also, judging by what I'm looking at right now, that's not an American. Yeah, that's very European looking.

[Frank Alvarez]

Very, very European.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I'm with you on that one. Well, we could be. We're podcast maxing.

[Ant Prisco]

True.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, we are.

[Joe Sanigal]

We are podcast maxing.

[Ant Prisco]

I guess you can max me anything. I think it's funny. Like, if you were closer to the frame than Joe, you'd be like, look, I'm frame maxing you. That's so funny. Like, that's so funny to me.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, it's like, used against someone.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ant Prisco]

It's competition. Like, looks maxing. You're trying to outlook.

[Joe Sanigal]

And like, mogging is like, if you're. If you look better than me, then it's like Frank's mog and Joe moggin you. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

These are all words that I don't know. Well, yeah, we're learning something today. Who told you that the basement art podcast wasn't educational?

[Ant Prisco]

Like, you're. You're watch mogging right now.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, you said it, not me. But he's. He's bank account mogging all of us.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

He's bank account Max.

[Ant Prisco]

He's cash maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

He's cash maxing. He's investment maxing too.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

I just.

[Frank Alvarez]

The fact that he has this studio. He's studio maxing us.

[Joe Sanigal]

Studio maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

So I guess he's mogging our student. He's mag.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's mocking you in a studio fashion.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, yeah, it happens, you know, Studio mogging maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

And, you know, we're all jester maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

What is that?

[Joe Sanigal]

It's like, funny. Like a jester.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, so I mog Jester Max you.

[Joe Sanigal]

That I don't know now. I don't even know. I might get a nosebleed in a minute.

[Frank Alvarez]

I honestly don't know any of how this works.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Ant Prisco]

But jester maxing describes as behaving overly funny, entertaining, or foolish to attract attention from women and friends.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, I'm not doing that. I guess we're not doing that.

[Joe Sanigal]

We're. Well, I'm just gonna leave out that part.

[Frank Alvarez]

But yeah, because, like, we're doing this to have a successful podcast. It's not like it's like, let's get the ladies.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah. So then Jester maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Podcast maxing. I think let's do that.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, that's the title. No, Jester maxing with Frank Alvarez.

[Ant Prisco]

Podcast maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's gotta be. Podcast maxing would be the. I think that's what you're doing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Okay, we're gonna advertise Max advertise maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

We're advertise maxing real quick, and then I'll patreon Max.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's gonna.

[Frank Alvarez]

So we are.

[Joe Sanigal]

We are podcast Bruno advertise maxing. Right now, the first one that we have is hims. Okay. Hims offers convenient access to a range of prescription hair loss treatments. With ingredients that work, including chews, oral medication, serums and sprays. So if you're a guy out there and your hair is like thinning or you're losing some hair or you just want to be super preventative, this could be for you. These are doctor trusted ingredients like finasteride and minoxidil so it can help stop further hair loss and regrow hair in as little as three to six months. So very helpful for people that are losing their hair in some sort of way. They have 24, seven provider support and once a day treatment options that fit your daily routine. For simple online access to personalized and affordable care for hair loss, ED, weight loss and more, visit hims.combasement that is hims.combasement for your free online visit. All right. Featured products include compounded drug products which the FDA does not approve. Verify for safety, effectiveness or quality. Prescription required. See website for full details, restrictions and important safety information. Individual results may vary based on studies of topical and oral minoxidil. If finasteride, head to hims.com basement and enjoy that folks. And we also have Squarespace. Squarespace is a platform where you're going to be able to build your website and run it efficiently in the best way possible. In my opinion, anytime that we create a landing page page we're using Squarespace. And Squarespace has a bunch of templates that make it very easy to launch your website. You can have a great looking website in a little amount of time because now you don't need to hire someone to code the entire thing anymore. With these templates you can go in, change the photos, change the text. You have a very professional looking website in such a short amount of time and you could do it yourself even with no experience. I did it and I had zero experience with that, so you definitely could. But they also have a bunch of tools that help you optimize your traffic, let you know where it's coming from and how to you know where to put some marketing dollars, how to make it better, whatever you need. So if you have content or you have an E commerce business or anything, this could be helpful and you could head to squarespace.com basement to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain using the code basement. Okay, that is squarespace.com basement to save 10% off of your first purchase of a website or a domain.

[Frank Alvarez]

And listen, you want to subscribe max and subscribe mog the people in your life that aren't members of the Patreon, go to patreon.com the basement yard we're podcast maxing on there and what you could do is you could sign up and you can get these weekly episodes one week in advance and then next year you'll be view maxing exclusive episodes on Friday. So you start and end your week with the Basement yard on Patreon. Patreon.com the basement yard is the best way to support us. And we thank you. The over 50, 45,000 of you. I'm getting ahead of myself, but it's okay. I'm getting ahead of myself. Maxing the over 45,000 Patreon members. Thank you guys so much. We hope you enjoy it and we want to keep giving you guys what you like. So go check it out. Patreon.com the Basement Yard if you join and you're new and you've never been everything that's back catalog, you'll get it and then you'll get the new stuff as it comes out. It's a win win. You get sandwiched by Basement Yard episodes. That's nice, right? Sandwich maxing. So go check it out. Patreon.com the basement yard and if you want to save yourself a couple bucks while you're doing it, go use that web browser that you use, whatever it may be, Safari, Google, Chrome, I don't know of any other ones. I can't think of them. But if you go to that, that, that website, patreon.com the basement yard you type it in instead of using the app, you'll save yourself a couple extra bucks. If you use the app, they're gonna take some money from you, a little bit of extra. So save yourself a couple bucks. Why not? Patreon.com the Basement Yard we love you. We thank you. We appreciate you. We'll see you episode maxing on there. I'm gonna be miserable with this maxing. I can tell everything that I say is gonna happen.

[Joe Sanigal]

You let four of them rip. I do want to talk about. There was a story of the chocolate. There's Viagra accidentally in the chocolate. There was like a recall. I don't know if it was like one of the popular ones, but dude, can you imagine?

[Frank Alvarez]

Wait, like it's. It's boner chocolate.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't think it's meant to be boner chocolate. There was.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, it's like straight up chocolate.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like it needs to be. Yeah, yeah. It's like chocolate that.

[Frank Alvarez]

How does that happen?

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know. Maybe there was like a spill in the Cialis factory.

[Frank Alvarez]

But why are they making Chocolate in the Cialis factory?

[Joe Sanigal]

That's a great question.

[Frank Alvarez]

How would that even happen? Someone thought, like, this is gonna be a big prank, and they dropped a handful of boner pills into the chocolate batch.

[Joe Sanigal]

Isn't chocolate an aphrodisiac to begin with?

[Frank Alvarez]

That's what they say. We've looked it up a ton of times. Chocolate, strawberries, oysters, something like that. But, like, I think I'm into strawberries

[Joe Sanigal]

now, by the way.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just deciding a strawberry max on people.

[Joe Sanigal]

I, I, I just, I was never really into them. And then the other day, I, I had one and it was like a apple. It was like a wet strawberry. And I was like, it was like. I was like, yo, I'm drinking this.

[Frank Alvarez]

See, now, now how do I. What do I even do with that? Take a time out, dude. You need to have, like, proper strawberries.

[Joe Sanigal]

Why can't the one that I had be proper? Because it wasn't the one that you got.

[Ant Prisco]

What is a proper strawberry?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, real strawberries are like, this big. The ones where they're like apples are not as like, bro, when you taste the ones that are, like, real, like, this big, they taste like strawberry flavorings.

[Joe Sanigal]

I've had a Japanese strawberry they make, though.

[Frank Alvarez]

They're like oishis or something like that. I forgot the name of them there. I've seen them at, like, Whole Foods and stuff. Yeah, I don't know, but, like, it's like $20 for a pack of six strawberries. Yeah, we're not there yet. I mean, I mean, some of us podcast pocket maxing on them.

[Joe Sanigal]

Frank, you're not poor. You're not poor.

[Frank Alvarez]

I never said I was poor.

[Joe Sanigal]

I can't buy a $20 strawberry, brother. Pull your fucking sweater down.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, this was a gift joke. This was a gift from the guy that, that watch mogged me on on stage. Watch mog you watch mog me on stage? I just, I hear what you're saying. I want you to experience the good parts of life. And the good part, the best parts of life, are better strawberries for you.

[Joe Sanigal]

I can't do anything without you trying to say that I did it wrong and I need to do it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm not saying you did it wrong, but you could do it better.

[Joe Sanigal]

So that's what I meant.

[Ant Prisco]

Some intense points. I'm gonna be honest.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm trying to better max your life.

[Joe Sanigal]

You're trying to life max me.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm life trying to life max you so you can have but chocolate boner pills.

[Joe Sanigal]

Imagine eating chocolate and you're just Hard as a demon. I feel like that has happened to me before. Like if I get like a good gear. Our deli, like the caramel ones, I'll get steamy penis. Dude, I'm for real.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hard, like a demon hit me so.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, you ever get. All right, it's weekly. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

So take it easy on the demon boners.

[Joe Sanigal]

I know that, I know that. Like the story. Can you just pull up the story? Just type in chocolate and boners.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, well, actually chocolate, no chocolate recall boners.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Be very specific because I'm pretty sure

[Joe Sanigal]

that like there, there's a. This is an actual issue because they put too much of it in or whatever.

[Ant Prisco]

This one?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yes, this four minutes ago. Holy shit. I mean, there's there's other stories. Life threatening amount of Viagra that I didn't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay, that, that I understand why it's scary. I mean, a recall is scary because.

[Joe Sanigal]

Hold on, which ones? Because I love chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, if it's called fantasy aphrodisiac chocolate though. That's boner chocolate.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, yeah. No, they're trying to go for it.

[Frank Alvarez]

So make love. Making more desirable, exciting and pleasurable.

[Ant Prisco]

I looked it up a little bit on my phone too. I think this, this was already boner chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, they just added too much.

[Ant Prisco]

Way too.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can.

[Joe Sanigal]

Got it.

[Frank Alvarez]

You could buy boner chocolate. You don't need to get it prescribed by a doctor, bro.

[Joe Sanigal]

They put everything in chocolate, mushrooms.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but like, I imagine that boner pills are. Which is hysterical that we're calling.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, they're boner.

[Frank Alvarez]

They're a controlled substance. So like, you can't like buy it over the counter, can you?

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, you can get horny goat weed over the counter.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but horny goat weed is not. I think it's just like, like an herb. It's like, it's like cat. What's the one that cats use?

[Joe Sanigal]

Catnip.

[Frank Alvarez]

Catnip. It's just an herb.

[Joe Sanigal]

Wait, does catnip make cats horny? My guy, I thought catnip was like a slang for food.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, catnip is a real thing. It gets them like ready to fuck.

[Joe Sanigal]

What? I thought catnip was like, just like a. Oh, yeah, no, it's their catnip.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, catnip is like a real, like. It's like horny goat weed, but for cats.

[Joe Sanigal]

Dude, what's it for? Why do they need to be.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know, to get them ready to fuck?

[Joe Sanigal]

Why do they need to be? They're animals, aren't they? Ready to go.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I don't know. I don't know the libido of cats, but catnip is a real thing. Look up catnip.

[Joe Sanigal]

Can you look up. Make sure that catnip is like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. There's also a chance I'm wrong.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't think you are you.

[Frank Alvarez]

What is catnip?

[Joe Sanigal]

Don't type in.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just type in what is catnip? What is catnip? Dude, what is catnip? Why do we need to specify what is catnip?

[Joe Sanigal]

What does it do?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't want to see. No AI answer. Give me the real fucking urban. The mint.

[Joe Sanigal]

Native to Europe and Asia. Now I'd spread in North America. Come on. Oh, there. There it is.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's its ability to induce a temporary state of euphoria or relaxation in many cats. Is that horny? We don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, horny is euphoric.

[Joe Sanigal]

I agree. I agree. Relaxation feels like after horny.

[Frank Alvarez]

It feels like this is. Yeah. After the completion of horny.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. Then I'm like, all right, after the

[Frank Alvarez]

successful completion of after the catnip, I

[Joe Sanigal]

need a cat nap.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. I just so, you know, I. I like what you did there, but that also kind of sucked. I guess it's more like they get high than they get horny.

[Joe Sanigal]

It causes hyperactivity, rolling, rubbing, and playful, silly behavior. This is horny.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's horny, dude. When inject cats to dry hump.

[Joe Sanigal]

And that's if they smell it, but if they ingest it, it often acts as a sedative, causing relaxation. Okay, so this is kind of like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because I remember we had. We had like. Like, it was like a catnip. Like, those cardboard, like, things. They have, like, holes in them. They're almost like scratching posts.

[Joe Sanigal]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

And it had catnip in it. And my cat used to go grind up on this thing like it was making dough.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, wow.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. So I. I. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, it's a safe assumption. I mean, the. Based on what? That. That means horny to me. I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I think that's. I think we have seen enough to scientifically say that catnip is meant to get cats horny.

[Joe Sanigal]

Damn. And I'm eating a lot of chocolate this weekend. I mean, it's Easter.

[Frank Alvarez]

Easter. Oh, so you're just gonna be horny around your family?

[Joe Sanigal]

I'll tell you what. I. I haven't not been horny around my family. Because of those Cadbury eggs. My God.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh. All right.

[Joe Sanigal]

Once I start popping those, I'm Little.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's not where I thought that was you.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean. I mean, we also have been young boys before. Before I'm. Oh, I was horny in front of my fan. Not in front. But, like, around my family, because that's where I lived.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right.

[Joe Sanigal]

Sorry for being 11, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

Sorry for party rocking, dude.

[Ant Prisco]

Yes.

[Joe Sanigal]

Sorry for. I didn't put the Good Housekeeping magazine in the bathroom. Someone else left it there. Okay. And that's all I needed.

[Ant Prisco]

It was horny maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

I was horny, Max, bro. I was horny maxing. We all were.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, yeah, we got caught, like, grabbing Becca's butt in front of her family the other day.

[Joe Sanigal]

Is that crazy?

[Ant Prisco]

I think it's a little weird.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, what kind of parents.

[Ant Prisco]

What's a grab?

[Joe Sanigal]

All right, did you. Was it the cheek, or were you.

[Frank Alvarez]

What part of her butt would it have been? Her hole?

[Joe Sanigal]

No, because.

[Frank Alvarez]

Did you. That's what I mean.

[Joe Sanigal]

Come here.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, that's what I mean.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, some people are, like. They go in between and kind of like, that's crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know who does that?

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, some weirdos, but I don't do. I mean, you go for the she.

[Ant Prisco]

What was.

[Frank Alvarez]

So stop asking me about how I touched my. Not that you brought the.

[Joe Sanigal]

Wait, Who?

[Frank Alvarez]

Did they say anything, this question? Yeah, Becca was just like.

[Joe Sanigal]

No, what did they say?

[Frank Alvarez]

Becca was like, babe. And then her dad was just like. He, like, laughed. Laughed it off.

[Joe Sanigal]

Does he laugh like a cat?

[Frank Alvarez]

He does, yeah. I thought he was, like, attacking, But in that moment, I was.

[Joe Sanigal]

You thought you were free? Yeah, like, there was no one around.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I can't help myself you know, sometimes. Yeah, so, like, say, her butt. I'm gonna grab it, you know?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

But I learned time and place,

[Joe Sanigal]

so she was like, oh, my dad's right there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but if I had. Why does she talk like a idiot? My dad's out like a sanitation worker. Yeah, I. I see why this is dangerous. Going back to the boner chocolate.

[Joe Sanigal]

Can't have too horny chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can't have too much horny chocolate. But, like, they got their name in the press. I've never heard of horny chocolate before, have you?

[Joe Sanigal]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

Boner chocolate. So, like, no. Bad press is bad press. Right.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm too afraid to indulge in that kind of thing until I absolutely need it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I would be afraid, because I'd

[Joe Sanigal]

be like, yo, if I do this, is my body gonna be like, this is what I need now and then I can't get boned up.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, you drink coffee, and it doesn't do that with coffee. Right?

[Joe Sanigal]

What?

[Frank Alvarez]

Not the coffee's giving you boners, but, like, in terms of, like, caffeine dependency,

[Joe Sanigal]

I kind of have been flirting with decaf now because I'm like, I'm heart maxing at the moment.

[Frank Alvarez]

Your heart? Max. Oh, you're VO2v2. That's what he's doing.

[Joe Sanigal]

I can't go for my runs.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's.

[Joe Sanigal]

My heart rate's already elevated from the coffee.

[Frank Alvarez]

That makes sense. But.

[Joe Sanigal]

But I. I don't know.

[Ant Prisco]

I think it would have been way cooler is if I got a Kit Kat and I was eating a kit now, and I'm like, whoa.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. You're like, whoa, this is a really good Kit Kat. Like, this is weird.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, that'd be way cooler than.

[Joe Sanigal]

Have you ever eaten.

[Frank Alvarez]

You start, like, undressing the KitKat bar and like, it's like, whoa, oh, whoa. Splitting it open. Oh.

[Joe Sanigal]

Have you ever eaten something and been like, oh, that. Like, that's. Now I'm horny.

[Frank Alvarez]

Really?

[Joe Sanigal]

No. I'm asking, have you ever.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can't think of anything, like, what would be horny Food to eat. Because I know, like, the aphrodisiac stuff.

[Joe Sanigal]

But, like, I just mean that it was so good that you're like, I've

[Frank Alvarez]

had some flans where I've been like, this is the close to sexual flaw, dude. Flan. Because it's, like, silky smooth and it

[Joe Sanigal]

kind of goes like that. You know what I mean? Like an ass. Yeah.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's always like, oh, my God, chill out. Spoon me.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. Like, I will, but chill.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Yeah. But that's the only one I could thank you. Knowing Joey's gonna be like, I had a real good turkey club.

[Joe Sanigal]

No turkey club.

[Ant Prisco]

I had a friend when he was younger, would just after school, just go get Zeppel, sit down in his living room, just watch porn, eat Zeppelis.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. That kid's a nut job, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's a maniac.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. What's going on?

[Frank Alvarez]

What kind of. First of all, where the Was he getting Zeppel all the time of the year?

[Joe Sanigal]

I got a better question.

[Ant Prisco]

Why the hell do you told me.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's like, yo, I just go home and I pop open these 12 Zeppelins and I just like, let her rip.

[Frank Alvarez]

Would he use, like, the zeppelin powder? Like, it was like gym chalk. No, I don't get ready.

[Ant Prisco]

I think that's as far as it went. It went well. Good session. And then he just.

[Frank Alvarez]

But what?

[Joe Sanigal]

Put sessions.

[Frank Alvarez]

Wait, so no, he was watching it for like it was like game tape.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, yeah, like, like game tape. Just nothing. Just eating Zeppelin's and watching. Like you're watching a cartoon.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, no, he's a porn addict brother. Yeah. When was this?

[Frank Alvarez]

This guy's still alive again.

[Joe Sanigal]

Middle school. Middle school. How about a parent? How about one parent? No one's home to be like, hey, not Zeppelin's every day. And also this is the living room.

[Frank Alvarez]

Also. Where the fuck was he getting all year round? Zeppelin, dude.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's a fair question.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know why it's his first one, but it's a fair one.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean the obvious. Pizzeria, sanity behind the fucking.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Jerk maxing of his dick with. With Zeppelin is crazy.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, it's just, it's just what he did. I don't know. Everyone has their, you know, it's what, what they did when they were younger. Everyone has it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I, I mean everyone has something, but like, it's not that. Yeah, like that's a little out there. Like you're wasting perfectly good Zeppelin.

[Joe Sanigal]

Do you. I mean, he's eating them.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, he's eating them.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is a very weird. Is this kid still alive?

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, he's still around.

[Joe Sanigal]

What would make you assume that he died?

[Frank Alvarez]

This maniac is sitting there every day eating Zeppelin. His heart's gonna fucking explode.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's inside, he's protected. Oh, he might. Yeah, too many. Zeppelin will put you down, bro.

[Frank Alvarez]

The zeppelin's clogging your arteries. And then the jerking off, bringing your heart rate to a fucking 200 beats per minute is gonna kill you. I don't think.

[Ant Prisco]

I think it was strictly game tape. I think was strictly game tape.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's worse.

[Joe Sanigal]

I agree that it's worse.

[Frank Alvarez]

Way worse. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like I don't even know how to. I don't know. That's strange.

[Frank Alvarez]

He was view maxing. I'm getting out of hand now. I need to. I need to stop.

[Joe Sanigal]

We all are.

[Frank Alvarez]

To be fair. We need to stop collective. I hope that no one gets like seriously hurt from this boner chocolate. That would be sad.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's life threatening.

[Ant Prisco]

Speaking of cats, last thing, when Frankie walked in today, I. I thought his hat was a cat sandwich.

[Joe Sanigal]

Can I see it?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't even know. And I said the same thing. I was like, where do you see cats?

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't see cats, but I also don't know. What's that? Is that a sloppy joe or something?

[Frank Alvarez]

It's. It's a beef a slice. It's like a beef sandwich.

[Joe Sanigal]

Okay.

[Ant Prisco]

I Think it looks like a bunch of jumbled cats.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I guess if I squint and turn it sideways, maybe I could see it. Like a cat.

[Ant Prisco]

No, a bunch of cats. It's a bunch of cats.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no, I get what you're saying. Got it.

[Joe Sanigal]

What?

[Frank Alvarez]

It's a. We got it. When we. When we threw out the pitch for the. The Buoy Bay Sox, they were like, do you want a hat with a beef sandwich on it? And I said, yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, we had the beef sandwiches.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. And it had cheese on it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Very happy about that.

[Ant Prisco]

Sorry.

[Joe Sanigal]

Last thing on cats.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Sorry.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. I don't think anyone's gonna. I mean, hopefully no one. They say that, like, it could lower your blood pressure and then you can.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, it's because it takes your blood and puts it in your penis. Isn't that what it does?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think that what Dr. Mike told us.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, it, like, sends a lot of blood there.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's just like. Calling all cars. Calling all cars. We need you in the dick.

[Joe Sanigal]

Everyone get to the penis, stat.

[Frank Alvarez]

How does it know where to go, the blood?

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, I mean, when you get a boner, that's what's happening.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but, like, how do you. How does your blood know. Like, how does the pill make the blood know, like, go to the boner?

[Joe Sanigal]

I think it's just a, like, circulatory thing. Yeah, like, it's just. It just makes that, like, easier, so.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, okay. So it's like your brain knows that you're trying to get a boner, so you take the pill and it. And it works in tandem with the blood, so it knows where to send it. Yeah, your brain. Your brain is playing crossing guard. I thought you were.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. You're circulatory.

[Frank Alvarez]

Max. I'm serious. I need a shield. I was going to stop.

[Ant Prisco]

This does feel like something. If you were younger, you'd be running with.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I would have been miserable. I would have been a not good version of myself with this whole maxing thing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Have you ever taken it, like a Viagra or Cialis? No, I haven't.

[Frank Alvarez]

You.

[Ant Prisco]

I have the same fear you have

[Joe Sanigal]

that it's gonna, like, ruin.

[Ant Prisco]

I'm gonna need it. And I'm. I'm good.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's why I. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Things are all right.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, I'm working.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's what I'm saying. You know, Don't. Don't fix a leaky pipe. Well, no.

[Joe Sanigal]

If it ain't broke. Don't.

[Frank Alvarez]

There it is. That's.

[Joe Sanigal]

Hey, don't fix a Leaky pipe Let

[Frank Alvarez]

it leak Let it get all over

[Ant Prisco]

the ground Car's broken down, don't fix

[Joe Sanigal]

it don't fix your.

[Frank Alvarez]

Don't fix your busted tire if it ain't. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. That's what I meant.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, but.

[Ant Prisco]

But what if you double fix it?

[Frank Alvarez]

What does that mean?

[Ant Prisco]

Like, you don't just replace a tire. You add spinning rims. If you take it, you know, how

[Frank Alvarez]

the hell would that happen? I don't think that's what that. It doesn't give you, like, a permanent boner. I think, if anything, that's not good.

[Joe Sanigal]

I do know people. Well, I don't know them personally, but I've heard of people taking some of the pills like that because it's like, I'm gonna be on my tonight.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

[Joe Sanigal]

And it's like, you really want to, like, really have, like, one of those crazy boners. Like, you really want to be like, yo, you know, like, you know, so,

[Frank Alvarez]

you know, do it with your arm. That would make more sense for you, right?

[Ant Prisco]

I'm not trying to boner Max.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know you boner Max by sitting there, baby. Yeah, I. Yeah, I. I don't know anyone. If they do it, they don't tell me.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, but, like, I feel like

[Joe Sanigal]

having, like, a really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really hard boner would be painful.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think that is, like, an issue.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Where, like, that's why they say, like, after four hours, like, all the blood is there. I mean, think of, like, if you put, like, if you have something that's, like, cutting off circulation in your finger, all the blood is there. It's starting to build up of pressure and, like, that. You need to, like, alleviate it. So I imagine it would hurt.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. How do they even do. Oh, did Dr. Mike say they, like, drain it?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, they drain it with a needle.

[Joe Sanigal]

Chill, bro. Putting a needle into my wiener would be like.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's like how they do, like, cauliflower here.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I've seen videos of that.

[Frank Alvarez]

That sucks.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, my God. Can you imagine? She's like, yo, I just literally can't stop having a boner.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I. No, I can't imagine. I could see that being incredibly painful. But then also, how do you, like, you have to, like, hold it down to when you're.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, when you're in the emergency room, you're just, like, standing like this.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I need to see the doctor.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm Fine.

[Frank Alvarez]

I wonder how long that would take because the emergency room. Have you ever been to an emergency room? Yeah, it could take hours, dude.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

So, like, how long are they there? Like, are you there with just this boner?

[Joe Sanigal]

God forbid someone comes in with a gunshot wound, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

You're like, keep that thing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

We gotta go deal with this guy over here.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, man, I can't even imagine that isn't. It's like four hours. If it's. If it lasts more than four hours, I'll be.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm panicking on an hour.

[Joe Sanigal]

Dude. At 53 minutes, I'm gonna go. I'm dying.

[Frank Alvarez]

53. That's very specific.

[Joe Sanigal]

I know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, because he's big. Long last guy.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm saying the opposite. I'm saying that if my boner lasted. Bro, four hours is such a crazy amount of time.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can't even. Like, what do you do with a four hour boner? What do you do with a three hour boner? The dishes. Can you just gotta stand a foot back.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. Whoa.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gotta stand a whole foot back to my giant

[Joe Sanigal]

Jesus.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what I mean?

[Joe Sanigal]

Dude, I can't. How am I gonna do the dishes

[Frank Alvarez]

from across the room?

[Joe Sanigal]

Because I'm so boner. You know what I mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what I mean? Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Jesus.

[Frank Alvarez]

If you. If you were to make. How they have boner chocolate. Yeah. If you were to make, like, your business, Joe.

[Joe Sanigal]

Boner something.

[Frank Alvarez]

A boner version of a snack or a drink or something. Because there's like, everything is protein now, so.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, in a dessert.

[Frank Alvarez]

Ooh.

[Joe Sanigal]

Because I feel like if you hide

[Frank Alvarez]

it in like a slice of cake, like, I'm a dog.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, I wouldn't hide it. Why am I hiding it?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. Oh, like, mix it in with the ingredients. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

I thought the question you were asked.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yes, I am asking that question. I just forgot

[Joe Sanigal]

I would put it in dessert because I feel like that's the last thing you eat. Like when the meal is over and it's like, you had a nice meal. It was a candle at dinner. You kind of like throwing eyes.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay, you. You specified the dish, but, like, what is the actual item?

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I know what Joey's would be.

[Joe Sanigal]

Maybe like an ice cream.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I was gonna. I thought you were gonna go to Tiramisu.

[Joe Sanigal]

Tiramisu. Isn't that sexy? Because you could choke on the cocoa

[Frank Alvarez]

or whatever that is. By you, you mean you.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah. I've. I've almost died at restaurants because of tiramisu. I'll get Some of that, and I'll just like. And then the. The dust hits my back.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. And it's like the cinnamon challenge.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. It's bad.

[Ant Prisco]

If a restaurant offered, like, on the menu, on dessert menu, it said aphrodisiac dessert or something.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Ant Prisco]

Would you trust. Would you get it?

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, if it's on a menu, you kind of need to.

[Joe Sanigal]

I think that if. If the date was going there. Yeah. I'd be like.

[Frank Alvarez]

I feel like.

[Ant Prisco]

I feel like even if it's like,

[Frank Alvarez]

you wouldn't want to be presumptuous is what you're meaning. Like, if, you know, the date is, like, moving in a good.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. If, like, we've been, like, looking at each other, we're, like, rubbing feet and shit. I'm like, yo, get the aphrodisiacs dessert in here. Get the fucking ice cream in here. Let's go crazy.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah. I mean, I don't know.

[Joe Sanigal]

You need something with spoons, though, because spoons are, like, sexy.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know it. I would.

[Joe Sanigal]

Forks aren't sexy. They're mad sharp. Spoons are like. You know what I'm saying?

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, like a spoon.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's kind of like.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can do sexy fork.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. But I don't like teeth. Like. Like when you bite it and they,

[Frank Alvarez]

like, pull it out. I don't like that. Really?

[Joe Sanigal]

When people eat like that, like, they bites forks, I'm kind of like, oh, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

You see them, like, clean off a spoonfully, and you're just like. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Because it's like, lip. It's like.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, you can lip a fork. You could. You could.

[Joe Sanigal]

You could.

[Ant Prisco]

What would you say the ratio is of sexiness for a spoon? This way or this way?

[Frank Alvarez]

If it's. If it's.

[Ant Prisco]

You know what I mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

If it's spoon down, like, if it's hump up, that's sexy. It sucks.

[Ant Prisco]

I thought that one was sexier.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, like when.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, like when they do it and they pull it that way. Oh. Because you don't want them to be like. That's what I'm saying.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because it's like.

[Ant Prisco]

That's what I'm saying.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. No, when you can pull it down, like.

[Ant Prisco]

Like the ratio of spoon sexiness is very high.

[Frank Alvarez]

I guess that's. That's a great point. I never thought of it that way. But, like, you can pull it out that way, too. You're just going against the grain.

[Joe Sanigal]

It would, like, catch your lip.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, that's okay. That's all right.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. I mean, you know, if you got to dessert and it's horny time. It doesn't matter what you eat.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm telling you right now. What if it's like cheetos but the dust is like boner dust. So after you eat your bag of Cheetos, you're just like.

[Joe Sanigal]

I will say it would be strange for you to be the one being like,

[Frank Alvarez]

you know, like, because there's no phallic. Here, eat this.

[Joe Sanigal]

Take the cheetos and eat it as if for me.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay. Eat it as if you were a me. Wait, wait, wait. Now that's a good question. Do they make lady boner pills? I guess it's just. I don't know.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's a great question.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, do they make like lady like cuz guy boner pills?

[Joe Sanigal]

I guess because he a boner it

[Frank Alvarez]

gives you a boner. But like, do they make like lady boner pills? I feel like google lady boner pill one day we're gonna stump you.

[Joe Sanigal]

Is it just like compliments or something?

[Frank Alvarez]

Being kind? Is it just being nice? Being not a piece of being a. Like, just like thinking like about someone's feelings.

[Joe Sanigal]

I think it might be listening or something. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Guys get Cialis and Viagra and women get just like, seems like.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yep.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, yeah. Just chemicals to boost libido.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is there like a popular one?

[Ant Prisco]

V Y L E E S I

[Frank Alvarez]

V L Y Vlessy Vlessi.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, I think I've like heard of that before, but it's not very. Yeah, I guess it's just dudes.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, I'm not. How are we.

[Joe Sanigal]

How are we considered the horny race or race the horny gender? But we need bills.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. I don't know if you would ask me at like 15, like this conversation would blow my mind.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'd be like, what? I swear to God. I just thought, I just thought of this right when you just said that if I could ask myself at 15, if at any point we get to a place in the world where we can actually we have the technology to go back in time and ask our younger selves anything.

[Frank Alvarez]

That would be the greatest episode of a podcast ever.

[Joe Sanigal]

I would be astounded if we can take the 15 year old versions of ourselves, edit it. Oh yeah. But just ask them questions and like it would probably be the dumbest thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

All I.

[Joe Sanigal]

All I pray we would undo so much that the world has made.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. All I pray that if that technology does exist, like it's like we're getting there. Make it just for podcasting. We don't need to make it for anything else, we don't need to have like LeBron James talk to himself on draft day.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't need to know what Abraham Lincoln's voice was like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I don't care about that. Someone tweeted recently and it was just like, you know, Abraham Lincoln's hat went flying at the play that day. Why would they say that? But, dude, that would be the single greatest episode of a podcast that has ever existed.

[Joe Sanigal]

Imagine being able to ask 15 old Frankie, like, what's. Who's the coolest guy in the world? Like, you probably say like, something crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean. Yeah, I would, I would. Who was popular when we were in. In 15, in 2007?

[Joe Sanigal]

You probably say like, Jermaine Dupree or some shit.

[Frank Alvarez]

Damn, he's still pretty cool. He made him quite the bow wow. So, so deaf. We did an episode of that. Maybe we should revisit an episode of that for Patreon years ago where we did like a. My. Do you remember that we did a MySpace, like, quiz and you wrote what you thought my 15 year old answer would be. I wrote what yours was. Remember? Po delica Podelika Podelika. No, Joey, you were very like, minimize maxing back then.

[Joe Sanigal]

What do you mean?

[Frank Alvarez]

Minimaxing? You'd be like, the answer would be like, what's your. What's a big turn on for you? And you'd just write like,

[Joe Sanigal]

I was trying to be mysterious.

[Frank Alvarez]

You'd be mysterious and like that. Where I'd just be like, tits.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, I would also. I feel like I would, like. I would also like always have some girl that I was thinking about and be like, I'm gonna make sure she knows. Yeah, yeah. That I'm.

[Frank Alvarez]

Of course. And then I would be like, you know, brown hair, being able to rip a superman in Tony hawk's Pro Skater 3 with Bucky Lassic. Wow. Yeah. That's a. That's a poll.

[Joe Sanigal]

All right, we have to go back to advertise maxing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Advertise Max.

[Joe Sanigal]

And then we're gonna go back to podcast maxing. Don't worry. But we do have hellofresh. Hellofresh is great. Okay. It makes cooking effortless. So you can always look forward to a homemade meal with HelloFresh. No two meals will be the same. All right. This is a great way to get into cooking also. If you're not really into cooking, this is a great way to start because they're going to help you with all these recipes. Okay. You could choose from 80 plus global recipes every single month, including Vietnamese Moroccan, Caribbean and more. You could try unique ingredients like lemongrass, gochujang and curry paste that are pre portioned for you. But they have great stuff. So you go onto the website, you pick what you want and you're like, oh, that sounds interesting. You get the recipe, you get the pre portioned ingredients. Boom, you make it. Now you look like a professional chef. It's great. And I've used this for so long and it's so fun. My mom loves this like you would not believe. So it's great. It keeps everything nice and fresh. You're not eating the same thing. It's amazing. So go to hellofresh.com basement10fm now to get 10 free meals plus a free neutral NutriBullet Ultra Plus 2 in one compact kitchen system and a 190 value on your third box. Free meals applied as a discount on the first box. New subscribers only. Varies by plan. Disclaimer the it must order the third box by May 31, 2026. Okay, so again, that is hellofresh.com basement10FM for those 10 free meals and the NutriBullet Ultra Plus 2in one compact kitchen system. Crazy on the third box. So yeah. Hellopress.com basement10fm and lastly here. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy. You can talk to a therapist in a short amount of time. The onboarding is around 48 hours. You can find a therapist for you. They make it very easy that if you don't vibe with the first person that you're talking to, you can just switch get to the next person. It's a very important part you need in order to do therapy efficiently. In my opinion, you need to have someone you kind of vibe with who kind of understands you or just kind of like on your same wavelength. So it's a very important thing. And I don't think it's just for people that have something traumatic going on in their lives or anything like that. Like it's just like going to the gym for your brain and it really helps you understand yourself more. And I think that everyone should be in therapy. I think it's very helpful. So if you want to get started with better help, you can sign up and get 10 off at betterhelp.com Basemanyard that's B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P.com Basemanyard so yeah, go check it out. Betterhelp.com all right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Therapy maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Therapy max.

[Frank Alvarez]

That would be therapy maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yes.

[Frank Alvarez]

We're Healing, heal, maxing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

This has got to stop. Yeah, I apologize. I'm becoming. I'm the issue here. I'm fully aware of that, too, that I'm being the issue. I'm sorry.

[Joe Sanigal]

What was I gonna say? Oh, also, you brought this up beforehand, but the giant Costco chocolate bunny, dude, how much does it weigh?

[Frank Alvarez]

10 pounds. And it's, like, hollow. Which, I'll be honest, my first thought is, I want to break it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, you gotta break it.

[Frank Alvarez]

But, like, I want to, like, drop an elbow on it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Or. Does it have, like, one of those eyes? Like, the eyes you can.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think it does. It has, like, one of the ears is down, so it's like. Oh, it's kind of. It's got a little personality, but it's like 140 beans, dude.

[Joe Sanigal]

$140? I mean, it's 10 pounds of chocolate. That's insane.

[Frank Alvarez]

How much of that do you think realistically you could get through in a day? Yeah, you could probably do £2. Yeah. Think so?

[Joe Sanigal]

It really depends. Like, I. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is it milk chocolate? If it's milk chocolate, I could do. I could do some damage.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, my God. If it's dark chocolate, I wouldn't even bite it. Yeah, I hate dark chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's too. It's too, like. I like things that are bitter. That's too bitter for me.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't like it at all, man. It's just not for me. This is the thing. That's 10.

[Frank Alvarez]

What? Why does it come with an egg?

[Ant Prisco]

This is it. No, this is a show reference. Because there's no other way to show.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's big, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's chocolate bunny maxing.

[Ant Prisco]

There's no other way to show reference. You need something. So this is the size of it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'll tell you this. That better be good chocolate. Because if it's garbage chocolate, that's such a waste, and I'll be so pissed.

[Joe Sanigal]

It does look milk.

[Frank Alvarez]

Also, I will say this, too. Not. Not doing America any favors by making this. We look as gluttonous as ever.

[Joe Sanigal]

Do we know how many calories this is?

[Frank Alvarez]

10 pounds of chocolate. Chocolate. That's a great question. I'm gonna assume the whole thing.

[Joe Sanigal]

Type in the Costco thing, like, exactly. They should have it, I assume.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I'm sure they have the nutrition facts somewhere.

[Ant Prisco]

It made me. It made me type in, like, have to type in a zip code and shit. So I just went straight raw. Okay, I have the details.

[Frank Alvarez]

Can we guess?

[Ant Prisco]

Yes.

[Frank Alvarez]

Go for it. I am going to say I wouldn't Even have a guess the whole thing. Well, is it broken down by serving?

[Ant Prisco]

I do have servings.

[Frank Alvarez]

And how many servings are in a billion? I don't know.

[Joe Sanigal]

Ten pounds of chocolate.

[Ant Prisco]

Do you want. You want. You want the answer?

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm gonna say it's broken up into about a cup. A serving is a cup. Or is it in ounces?

[Ant Prisco]

It would be grams. Right, Because Grams.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Okay, so I'm gonna guessing right now.

[Ant Prisco]

Well, is this helping you?

[Frank Alvarez]

No.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. How many calories are in the. Who.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, this. This 10 pound chocolate Costco bunny.

[Frank Alvarez]

2600.

[Joe Sanigal]

That is insanely low.

[Ant Prisco]

2600.

[Joe Sanigal]

2600. And like a. Like a Kit Kat has like 400. Like the big. The big Kit Kats are like 400.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm sorry, we're 10 pounds of chocolate. Jesus Christ. Why do you have to. I mean, a little max. Me?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. I'm gonna say like 12,000.

[Ant Prisco]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's no way it's 12,000.

[Ant Prisco]

Do you want.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's too much.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think that's way too much.

[Ant Prisco]

Do you want to change your answer or. I'll tell you.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right, I'll low. I'll change it one more time. I'm gonna say 4200.

[Joe Sanigal]

Would I say 12? Yeah, I'll say 12.

[Ant Prisco]

Total calories, 151 servings. 22,650 calories.

[Frank Alvarez]

22. Yo, that'll kill somebody if you have the whole thing.

[Ant Prisco]

Dude, it's 10 pounds of chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, that's 22,000 calories, brother. That's more than I have in a week. Are you kidding?

[Joe Sanigal]

That's fucking crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's 2,000 times seven. 14,000.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, brother.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's almost two weeks of food. Why don't we just not.

[Joe Sanigal]

Are you eating 2, 000 calories a day?

[Frank Alvarez]

You try, right?

[Joe Sanigal]

That's kind of low.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, you try to not have more than that.

[Joe Sanigal]

Scared me. Yeah, it's somewhere around there, but, dude, 22, 000.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's double what I thought, bro. Even the rock.

[Ant Prisco]

He said 2600.

[Joe Sanigal]

2600 has been.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Forgive me. I don't know.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm not a Ben and Jerry's crushing that. Twelve thousand. Twelve hundred.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, dude, that is.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's almost like the amount of sad.

[Joe Sanigal]

Do you know what sugar it is?

[Ant Prisco]

I don't know. I don't have that. All that. I don't. I don't have the breakdown.

[Frank Alvarez]

150 servings. So then what's a serving? A hundred grams.

[Ant Prisco]

100. 150 calories. Per 30 grams serving.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, I wouldn't even. I don't even know how much that is, to be honest.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know, like, if I'm being.

[Joe Sanigal]

I would just gnaw on this thing's ear.

[Frank Alvarez]

But I don't understand how someone would get this, like, for serious, because, like, this would have to be for a classroom of children, bro.

[Joe Sanigal]

Let's get one. Crack it open right here. Let's eat a little bit of it.

[Ant Prisco]

I actually. I think I have the total sugars here now. I think it's 2900 grams, yo.

[Frank Alvarez]

What? That is unbelievable. This is kind of like it's over

[Ant Prisco]

six pounds of sugar across the whole. Across the whole bunny.

[Frank Alvarez]

I understand it's £10 and £6 of

[Joe Sanigal]

it is just sugar.

[Ant Prisco]

Well, yeah, I mean, it's.

[Frank Alvarez]

Dude, I understand things being released for like novelty items.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is crazy.

[Joe Sanigal]

This is up there with the supercharged lemonade that killed two from Panera. You remember that?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Had like 300 milligrams of caffeine in it.

[Ant Prisco]

Are you sure it's. It's hollow?

[Frank Alvarez]

I believe it is.

[Ant Prisco]

Because it says the novelty factor of this thing is it's often requires a hammer to break it apart.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, yeah. The shell could be so fucking intense.

[Ant Prisco]

Oh, you think so?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. We need to get one. Can you buy one?

[Frank Alvarez]

Brother, you. If that thing was solid, it would be £40.

[Ant Prisco]

I'll try to get one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Chocolate is dense. I mean, order it to the studio right now.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, is it that much? I mean, of course it's bigger, but is it that much bigger than like a chocolate bunny like that? You would just get.

[Frank Alvarez]

I got it. You know what you use this for?

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm afraid to hear what you're gonna say.

[Frank Alvarez]

You go in the sauna and you lay down a blanket and you go in with that and you put it down. Then you and your partner just roll around in it and just get fucking covered in chocolate.

[Ant Prisco]

Chocolate.

[Joe Sanigal]

You're a disgusting freak. Okay, what the hell are you talking about? How is that the thing that popped into your head? Take this thing into a sauna, let it melt on a towel and roll around in the towel chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because, like, I'd get in the.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'd get in a chocolate bath, though.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's basically what this is.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I'm going down like Augusta's Gloop. Dude, if you got a river, I'm drinking out of that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just like, imagine like you're outside in like 100 degree weather, and then you're just like. You like, hug and it's in between you and you. Just.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'll be honest with you. That sounds disgusting.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why?

[Joe Sanigal]

Because 100 degrees, I'm like sweating. I'm gross. And now I'm. There's chocolate involved and I'm sticky.

[Frank Alvarez]

And then you just go at it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, but just like sticky. I don't like sticky. Chocolate's not sticky in 100 degrees. I'm sure you'll stick.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, it's like not sticky. It's just kind of like thick, you know?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is. This is insane.

[Joe Sanigal]

That is so, so much. I'm into it, though.

[Frank Alvarez]

I am a little disappointed.

[Ant Prisco]

I think I can get it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Get it.

[Ant Prisco]

I think I can get it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Do you have a Costco membership?

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't think you need one if you're going online. What is.

[Ant Prisco]

I mean, you think that'll stop me, bro?

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, I think that. Fucking the rules.

[Frank Alvarez]

I would hope so, bro.

[Ant Prisco]

It's got a. Got a nerd over here.

[Joe Sanigal]

Nerd. Yeah, but if you ever try to go into a Costco though, the Dolores at the front and she'll kick your head.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, they'll. They'll beat the brakes off you if you try to go in.

[Joe Sanigal]

I've tried to go with my mom and she's like, where's your. I was like, I'm with her.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, they'll get you. This is kind of like. I don't know why, but this is sad to me.

[Joe Sanigal]

This.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, like there are people that like, can't afford groceries and it's just like have this novelty ten pound chocolate bunny.

[Joe Sanigal]

Dude, it's a hundred and fifty dollars also.

[Ant Prisco]

We'll be fine.

[Joe Sanigal]

Anyone who's buying this to eat it is nuts.

[Ant Prisco]

Well, instead of buying a bunch for a party, right, Like a bunch of kids, you could just buy this big one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, brother. 150 servings. What do you have at a party with 150 kids?

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

What is this fucking assembly?

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, but once you're having trouble, you don't actually just like, here.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay.

[Ant Prisco]

You don't do that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay, but still. So what? Each person's having double the amount. 75 people at this party.

[Joe Sanigal]

Also, children don't like to share. I'm gonna also take this bunny. Oh, cute bunny. I'm a. Slam it with a hammer.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yes.

[Joe Sanigal]

Terrible.

[Ant Prisco]

That wouldn't be cool when you were younger.

[Frank Alvarez]

When I was younger. Right now it'd be cool to break this thing apart.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, I'm. I'm looking forward to breaking one. If we can get one.

[Ant Prisco]

Should I get two?

[Frank Alvarez]

Get two and let's have a challenge. Who can punch through it. I don't want. He just looked at the camera. That's not a good idea.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm afraid to. For Frankie to have his own because of the ideas that he had already.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, for him and his partner,

[Joe Sanigal]

he's going to come in and be like, if I come back, my chest broke out.

[Frank Alvarez]

If I come out. Yeah. I've like broken out in like hives or like some form of like, rash. Becca and I rolled around with this.

[Joe Sanigal]

My pores are stuffed with chocolate.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can see. This is. This is crazy. This is like. This is what everyone believes America is. You know what I mean? Where it's just like everything's bigger and

[Joe Sanigal]

it's all chocolate and it's sugar too.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can't. I can't imagine. And also, who's selling this? Like, I know it's Costco. Who's the. Who's the seller? And how much does this cost to make?

[Ant Prisco]

I see.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, what's the markup on this?

[Ant Prisco]

I mean, actually, I don't know why I grabbed my phone. I can't. How can I find that?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, how much you think this is to make?

[Joe Sanigal]

What's the cost? Where does it land?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, landed.

[Joe Sanigal]

What's the landing price?

[Frank Alvarez]

What's the landed price?

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know. It's probably like fucking five bucks.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's bananas, dude.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, it's a lot.

[Frank Alvarez]

Now if this was stuffed with marshmallow

[Joe Sanigal]

or if there was a bunch of jelly beans in there, then it would

[Frank Alvarez]

be £40 because you'd put £30 of jelly beans in this thing.

[Joe Sanigal]

I cannot wait to eat jelly beans on the weekend.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, you've. You've spoken about your love for the starburst jelly beans. I don't really care much. Those are great for them. I am ready to be a little prostitute for peeps because I love my peeps. Oh boy. I like this time of the year. I like, drop hints to Becca just to remind her to get me peeps because my. Every year growing up, my mom would get me peeps for like every major holiday.

[Joe Sanigal]

Uh huh. So what, like you get peeps for Christmas?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, like snowman, Christmas tree, fourth of July peeps. I mean, that was not like a peep holiday. Like it would be like Halloween, Thanksgiving. No, but like not every major holiday. Fucking excuse me.

[Joe Sanigal]

Well, I didn't even know they did this outside of Easter.

[Frank Alvarez]

Easter, Halloween, Halloween peeps, they're like little ghosts or, or pumpkins or Frankenstein.

[Joe Sanigal]

I can't believe you like that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Dude. They're so good.

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't like Peeps.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I'm so. And I've gone on record and said the best. Like, you know how Oreo makes these, like, cool little flavors. They'll do like Cinnabon or, you know,

[Joe Sanigal]

that is such an insane.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's such a good one. But they had it one year for Easter. They had a Peeps flavor, and it was unfucking believable.

[Joe Sanigal]

What was it?

[Frank Alvarez]

It was just like, Peeps fluff in between, like, the Peep Fluff cream in between the vanilla cookies.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, what? Like a. Oh, like a Oreo. Oh. Oh, g. That sounds gross, actually.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Do you have fluff in your house right now? No, I haven't had that in a while.

[Frank Alvarez]

We used to, like, Miles had it.

[Joe Sanigal]

You've had fluff in your house?

[Frank Alvarez]

I feel like we used to make him fluffernutter sandwiches.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. Yeah, those are good, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love fluff.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Fluff is.

[Frank Alvarez]

What is it? It's just, like, whipped marshmallow.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, you can make it with your hands.

[Joe Sanigal]

I, I. We had fluff for a very short period of time growing up. But I used to get in there whenever no one was looking. Like, I would literally just stick my fingers in it. It was disgusting.

[Frank Alvarez]

I used to. There was, like, in middle school, there was a girl that, like, we were, like, talking online, and she said she liked fluff. So I went in with a tub of it one day, and I, like, looked at her, and I fluff maxed her.

[Joe Sanigal]

Girl said, you like fluff, and you brought a tub of it and ate

[Frank Alvarez]

it in front of her and just

[Joe Sanigal]

didn't talk to her.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was just like, I fluff mogged her.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, you, you.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mogged with fluff.

[Joe Sanigal]

Did it work?

[Frank Alvarez]

No.

[Joe Sanigal]

Got it.

[Frank Alvarez]

No do. Hold on. Wait. Let's back up before I gave you that answer. What do you think?

[Joe Sanigal]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

What grade?

[Frank Alvarez]

Must have been, like, seventh or eighth.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Young.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

A real dumb, ripe, dumb age.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, we're all doing crazy stuff back then.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I was. I. I was gonna say I was fluffing it. I wasn't doing that.

[Joe Sanigal]

You like fluff?

[Ant Prisco]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, yeah, Fluff needs to make it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Those are opposite answers.

[Ant Prisco]

Like, I, I've never, like, not enough to buy it or have it. I never really had it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Fluff needs to make a comeback. I'd like to see, like, it is very old school. Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Like, it's like, a very early how

[Frank Alvarez]

everything is, like, everything is protein, everything is dill pickle, everything Was like buffalo chicken. Like, let's bring fluff back in.

[Joe Sanigal]

Just marshmallow.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just, like, different. Like, fast food chains making, like, fluff. Seasonal sandwiches or something. Like, fluff on a burger. Doesn't sound that bad.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, dude, no. I mean, that's a little crazy.

[Frank Alvarez]

Really? Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's a burger.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't think so. I think it could be fun.

[Ant Prisco]

There was at one point I wanted to make a dessert company where. And it was called Spaghetti and Sweet Balls. And it would be like, dessert pasta.

[Frank Alvarez]

Love that. You could do it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Dessert pasta.

[Ant Prisco]

Like, the noodles would be like spaghetti noodles, but maybe cookie or.

[Frank Alvarez]

The thing that's rough is sauce syrup.

[Ant Prisco]

Thank you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Done.

[Ant Prisco]

Chocolate syrup.

[Frank Alvarez]

People do that with. People do that with, like, pancakes. They'll put pancake batter in, like, a squeeze bottle, and they'll make pancake spaghetti.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, it wouldn't actually be pasta. Like, you know, it'd be some.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't want to make it myself. Let the fast food companies make it, and then we'll buy it.

[Joe Sanigal]

There's a place I used to go to my cousin's house for wild card weekend, and there's a place that they were ordered pizzas from, but they also did dessert pies, bro. Yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That. Everyone has had a banana, strawberry, Nutella.

[Joe Sanigal]

No, this would have, like, ridiculous on it. Like, I mean, obviously it would be like an Nutella, like, pie or whatever, but then it would also just be like, dude, I don't know. There's, like, chocolate, there's brownie, and, like, the. In the whole, it's like a pizza, but it's like brownie and marshmallow and, like, I'm like, yeah, like, s' mores now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just imagine how good it would be if, like, a fast food company got it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Why do you love fast?

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm just saying, like, it's easier when they make it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, my God. You know what? You know who made this idea better? A corporation.

[Frank Alvarez]

They've never, like, in the trusted hands of Wendy's or something. Yeah, everyone does.

[Joe Sanigal]

Not. I.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why not?

[Joe Sanigal]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

They are.

[Ant Prisco]

They're.

[Frank Alvarez]

They're Wendy's.

[Joe Sanigal]

Not necessarily Wendy's. I'm not talking about.

[Frank Alvarez]

I bet you'll love it. Wendy's nuts got drag across your face.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

We do have to do something, though, because.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

The thing is,

[Joe Sanigal]

you laugh like a wicked witch.

[Frank Alvarez]

He does.

[Joe Sanigal]

And also.

[Frank Alvarez]

Frankie, can you hit him? Let me. Give me my space. One sec. Give it to me. I've earned this.

[Ant Prisco]

Frankie, hit him with a Gotham, please.

[Frank Alvarez]

Got him.

[Joe Sanigal]

First of All. Can we. The only problem that I have with him doing that is that you. You stumbled through the. Got him.

[Frank Alvarez]

I still got you, though. Wendy's. You could love.

[Joe Sanigal]

When they fucking Wendy's on your balls in your face.

[Frank Alvarez]

I get too excited. I start to see stars a little bit.

[Joe Sanigal]

What did you say?

[Frank Alvarez]

I bet you'll love them when Wendy's nuts drag across your face.

[Ant Prisco]

As soon as he said Wendy, I was like, all right. As soon as you. How long did you have that geared up?

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, the first time I brought up fast food in this episode.

[Joe Sanigal]

That was 20 minutes ago.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was wondering why you kept doing it. I was trying to bring it right back around to it. Give me some credit. Give me some. Right before this episode, I said to Joey, I was like, are we still doing the Gothams? Because it'll reach a point where Joey's just like, all right, enough. And I think I might have just got us there.

[Joe Sanigal]

No, I mean, you know, he's saying

[Ant Prisco]

you just be more classy with it.

[Joe Sanigal]

Not classy.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, he gets overly excited.

[Joe Sanigal]

He's like, you could win your Wendy.

[Frank Alvarez]

All your Wendy's on your face and

[Joe Sanigal]

your balls are out, you idiot. Got him.

[Frank Alvarez]

But you gotta understand, it's so. It's so like, I gotcha. Like, it's perfect. I set it up and it worked. I get very excited about it. That's like four Gothams I got on them.

[Joe Sanigal]

You. You worked on that one for a while, too, so.

[Frank Alvarez]

And I found a nice, natural way to work it in. Too natural. I mean, give me. Because now I feel like you always

[Joe Sanigal]

like, oh, I know all of them when they're coming. We're gonna. I'm gonna get you now. I'm not even going after him.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't even think you. You won't be able. Because he's a little sneaky boy over there. He'll be like this. He's a little sneaky boy over this sneaky boy. You'll be like, hey, and how was your day? And you go,

[Joe Sanigal]

my day in your mouth.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

My day in your nuts.

[Ant Prisco]

You could try.

[Joe Sanigal]

You.

[Frank Alvarez]

You were the coolest kid at lunch. I know.

[Joe Sanigal]

You were.

[Frank Alvarez]

We. We get it. No one's gonna got you. No one's gonna be in Mario Kart. You win.

[Ant Prisco]

No, my friend had the fruity pebble bar snack.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's a great snack.

[Ant Prisco]

He was. It was the coolest one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Remember Kudos bars? Those were cool.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh, what was.

[Frank Alvarez]

They were the ones. They were like granola with chocolate underneath and on the top. It would Be like M M's.

[Ant Prisco]

I do, I do Cosmic brownie.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's basically plastic, though. I love cosmic brownies. But if I had one. It's not a brownie. Do you know it's gum.

[Joe Sanigal]

Do you remember the pink snowballs?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

Never ate that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I wasn't big into those. I did like Twinkies. Yeah. Did like Twinkies just twitch. I thought about Twinkies.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's like, I like Twinkies.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, but cosmic brownies. I get why you were cool for having them, but like if I'm buying a box of 10 and they're 30 cents each, something in this is not real.

[Joe Sanigal]

Also little bites.

[Frank Alvarez]

Little bite. We still get little bites for the kids.

[Joe Sanigal]

Do you?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Mini muffins, they call them.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Ruby loves her mini muffins.

[Joe Sanigal]

My house was not a little bites house.

[Frank Alvarez]

But you guys didn't have a lot of snacks. You had a lot of drinks.

[Joe Sanigal]

We would do.

[Frank Alvarez]

I remember a lot of drinks. You always had like breakfast shakes. And you had what? You had juice.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean, we had juice, but what do you mean breakfast shakes?

[Frank Alvarez]

These breakfast shakes that Keith would have all the time, dude.

[Ant Prisco]

Like an insurer thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know what the brand was, but like it was like a packet of breakfast Shakespeare. And he would have them all the time.

[Joe Sanigal]

I think one time there was insure in my house. I believe it was for my grandma, but we used to crush them. Yeah. Have you ever had an insurer?

[Frank Alvarez]

No.

[Joe Sanigal]

What is it? It's like a. It's like. It's like a sub, not a supplement drink.

[Frank Alvarez]

But it's like.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, there's like a meal item.

[Ant Prisco]

A meal.

[Joe Sanigal]

It's like I'm kind of a meal replacement.

[Ant Prisco]

But it's.

[Joe Sanigal]

But it's small. It's like they're like chocolate milk. But they have like nutrients in them or whatever. Like vitamins and. And like protein.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. What's the one. What's the. The one that like. It's like a juice though. V8. No, no, no, no. It's like Pedialyte. Is it like Pedialyte?

[Joe Sanigal]

No, no, no. Cuz that's just for like hydration. That's just like electrolytes and.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, okay.

[Joe Sanigal]

Vitamin B or some. I don't know. But no, this was more of like. If you're deficient in certain things, then you like drink.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know what they look like. They look like the little cans. Yeah, they look like little bottles like this.

[Joe Sanigal]

And it has like cat food, kind of like catnip. Looks like Catnip. No, I don't know what catnip looks like.

[Frank Alvarez]

I thought they come in bottles and like you crack the top off.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, there was something like that. But there were some. There was kind of like cans too. I don't know. But we had snack. We had. We were. We had a lot of fruit roll ups.

[Frank Alvarez]

You always had. You always had ice pops and chocolate in your freezer?

[Joe Sanigal]

We always had ice pops.

[Frank Alvarez]

Always had chocolate in your freezer.

[Joe Sanigal]

Ice pops were big in my house, brother.

[Frank Alvarez]

The first. I remember the first time in college when I realized like I can buy those ice pops myself. I had a freezer full of 400 of those ice pops.

[Joe Sanigal]

I really do appreciate.

[Frank Alvarez]

Took a picture of it cuz I was so impressed.

[Joe Sanigal]

I'm impressed with myself here. I. I really appreciate how you can only buy those in the hundreds. Like it's like a box of a

[Frank Alvarez]

hundred because one of them is gone in 40 seconds. When's the last time you had one?

[Joe Sanigal]

Don't even know.

[Frank Alvarez]

They're not like they're not great for you, but like it's like each one is like five grams of sugar. It's not as bad as you would think.

[Joe Sanigal]

Wouldn't even stop me. I love like there's nothing like a well placed ice pop.

[Frank Alvarez]

Those flavor ice is the one.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah. Flavor ice.

[Frank Alvarez]

Name your favorite colors from least to most.

[Joe Sanigal]

I got a hot. I go back and forth with shit.

[Frank Alvarez]

I got a hot take for you.

[Joe Sanigal]

I feel like your hot take. I'm gonna agree with. Okay, but I like like the green's very good. I like the green.

[Frank Alvarez]

But I also like like, I like cuz it's lime.

[Joe Sanigal]

The pink is great.

[Frank Alvarez]

The pink is the best one.

[Joe Sanigal]

The pink is the best.

[Frank Alvarez]

Pink is the app.

[Joe Sanigal]

So I go back and forth from pink but low key.

[Frank Alvarez]

I fuck with the grape. All of them are good. I love my top two are pink and orange. Orange was like my favorite man, like ice pop flavor as a kid.

[Joe Sanigal]

Really.

[Frank Alvarez]

And then I bit into a creamsicle once and I was forever ruined.

[Joe Sanigal]

Creamsicles are tough, dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

Creamsicles suck so bad. I don't know where we've come as a society that people are just like, you know what's going to make this ice cream better? A layer of orange.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Get the out of here.

[Joe Sanigal]

You know what's crazy? One time I went to the Poconos with Greg and we stopped.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is that not the weird part?

[Joe Sanigal]

It wasn't just us. No. We went to the Poconos as just like a summer vacation thing. And we Went to the supermarket there and we were like buying stuff for the house. And they had ice pops, but they were alcoholic, dude. Each ice pop was 8% alcohol.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, dude. I've had what? I've had those. They'll get you. Yeah, I had them at the lake. Of course. Because they're all alcoholics up there.

[Joe Sanigal]

I mean when I was with you with the, the the 80s theme, top of the hill party, when we had the ice pops. That's when they had him. Yes.

[Frank Alvarez]

And we were quite inebriated. Good times.

[Joe Sanigal]

I was smoking a cigar. That was probably the last cigar I've ever had.

[Frank Alvarez]

You were. And you had. I'll never forget. It's the video of you dancing but you're just stepping forward and back with a cigar in your mouth to like we're in 70s attire, which I don't think you were wearing 70s attire. You just had a bandana on.

[Joe Sanigal]

I had a wig on.

[Frank Alvarez]

Did you have a wig?

[Joe Sanigal]

I did have a wig on and I had a headband and I had a tie dye T shirt. And then that was it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh yes. I remember the T shirt now.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And you were just. You were smoking a cigar, living your best life.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, that was probably my last cigar. It was also probably my last ice pop.

[Frank Alvarez]

Let's get some ice pops in here.

[Joe Sanigal]

Yeah, that's. That's depressing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Let's get some ice pops in here.

[Ant Prisco]

We can't have your mouth with an ice pop in front of that mic. There's no way.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I don't mean for when we're recording, brother. I would like an ice pop period. Oh yeah.

[Joe Sanigal]

We just to have.

[Ant Prisco]

I got you. Yeah, I gotcha.

[Frank Alvarez]

Not the alcoholic ones. You free. Cuz I know he's going to come in and be like you like those. Those are 800% alcohol.

[Joe Sanigal]

That's ain't for you. No fun. Well, I guess that's all we have for today. No ice pops. But yeah. Thank you guys so much for watching Frank. Where can they find you?

[Frank Alvarez]

The Frank Alvarez everywhere. Go check out patreon patreon.com the baseman yard. Thank you guys to for all the continued support that you guys are support maxing big time. Big time. I just like one of the suggestion

[Joe Sanigal]

buttons is lemon party.

[Ant Prisco]

Oh yeah. Probably gotta. Probably gotta bury that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gotta get rid of that.

[Ant Prisco]

Yeah, yeah, we probably gotta bury that.

[Joe Sanigal]

Oh aunt. Where can I find you?

[Ant Prisco]

Find me at Antprisco on Instagram.

[Joe Sanigal]

All right. Hell yeah. Follow me at Joe Sanigal go. Follow you at the basement yard. And that is all. See you guys next time.