#556 - Siblings Or Dating?!

Summary

The Basement Yard – Episode #556: Siblings Or Dating?!

Hosts: Joe Santagato, Frank Alvarez
Guest: Antonio Prisco
Date: May 25, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this lively and irreverent episode, Joe, Frank, and Antonio tackle the hilarious internet phenomenon “Siblings or Dating?”—an Instagram challenge that involves guessing whether pairs in photos are siblings or couples. The episode spirals in typical Basement Yard fashion, veering into sleep habits, nightstand confessions, bodily functions, and bone trivia, all while wrapped in the trio’s signature banter and playful ribbing.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Sleep Routines and Bathroom Struggles

• Nighttime Bathroom Strategies:

  • The group starts by discussing how they deal with the urge to pee at night, the lengths they'll go to delay getting up, and various “pain management” tactics.
    • Frank: “When it comes to having to piss in the middle of the night, logic escapes. Just for being able to sleep comfortably longer.” [03:39]
    • Joe: “When I have to pee real bad, and I finally get the chance to pee, and your penis is like, ‘we’re gonna let it out slower than normal.’” [04:34]

• Partner Dynamics & Bedside Water:

  • Frank jokes about stealing his wife’s nightstand water, leading to an anecdote about knocking over her coffee and a debate about nighttime beverages.
    • Frank: “I'm more likely to be in bed and drink water because she has it…right there.” [05:57]

2. Nightstand Confessions

• Spilled Drinks, Odd Items, and Cereal Catastrophes:

  • Frank shares a story about knocking coffee onto the floor, reflecting on evolving adulthood and bedside etiquette.
  • Antonio admits to having chocolate milk in a red Solo cup by his bed, leading to good-natured ridicule.
    • Antonio: “This was like a year ago, bro.” [08:57]
    • Joe: “That's kind of wild for having chocolate milk.” [09:46]
  • The crew discusses forbidden snacks in bed, kids spilling cereal, and the nightmare of spoiled milk.
    • Frank: “Spoiled milk smells up there with the worst smell.” [13:12]

• What’s in Your Nightstand?

  • Joe confesses to hoarding funeral cards. Antonio claims his nightstand is boring—except for “extra batteries…TV remote…anal bead?” [14:22, 14:26]
  • Mutual teasing on the appropriateness and variety of nightstand contents.

3. Sleep Preferences and Bed Habits

• Number of Pillows:

  • How many pillows is too many? The group confesses their setups, with pillow-wedge debates, headboard logistics, and the necessity of fan-cold rooms.
    • Antonio: “I put a pillow as a wedge pillow.” [21:17]

• Blanket Fort Technique:

  • Frank describes his blanket “burrito” method for comfort at night. [22:15]
    • Frank: “If this is the blanket, I like, roll it up and put it in between my legs.”

4. Wax, Candles, and Medieval Musings

• What Is Wax, Anyway?

  • The guys get lost philosophizing about the origins and nature of candle wax, leading to musings about medieval innovations. [22:46–23:45]
    • Frank: “Where the does wax come from? I know there's beeswax, but, like, is that... that's not wax? Wax?”

• Candle Memories:

  • The crew reminisces about candlelit vigils, Greek church parades, and the unique scent of “Greek church candles.” [25:14–26:55]
    • Frank: “They would give you a candle and you'd walk the streets with this candle for, like, St. Catherine or St. Demetrius.” [26:20]

5. Nostalgic Soda Talk

• Retro Soda Brands:
  • Fond throwbacks to discontinued sodas like Surge, Vault, and Mountain Lightning, and how these “electric” colored sodas left a mark on their youth. [28:00–34:01]
    • Frank: “Any drink that has, like, an electric color...I’m like, God, that's probably fantastic.” [28:22]

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The Main Event: Siblings or Dating? [34:27–47:02]

The Challenge:

• Antonio introduces the “Siblings or Dating?” segment via an Instagram page—shows couples, the group must guess the relationship.

  • Antonio: “Have you ever looked at a couple and went, are they siblings or are they dating?” [34:33]

  • The trio marvels at how often looks and poses can mislead and the inherent weirdness in sibling intimacy:

    • Joe (after a surprising reveal): “I'm noticing a pattern.” [38:41]
    • Frank: “How am I this consistently bad?” [44:19]

Notable Quotes & Segment Timestamps:

• [35:12] Joe: “Why does that guy look so familiar?”
• [37:14] Joe: “If this is your sister, that’s a crazy pose.”
• [39:07] Frank: “When you look out your window and you hear an owl. This is what you expect to see.”
• [44:23] Frank: “I think I got one, and you got one. We both single-handedly got one.”

Related Tangents:

• Frank recalls an awkward moment singing “Paradise by the Dashboard Light” karaoke with his sister before realizing the lyrics’ implications. [41:45–42:02]
• They discuss sibling behavior in public: when sibling affection crosses a line and how age changes perceptions. [48:00–50:01]

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Bone Trivia and Anatomy Confusion

• The group quizzes each other on bones, arteries, and bodily functions, resulting in a spiraling, comedic debate over what is and isn’t a bone.
  • [54:03] Joe: “You think I don’t know what a femur is? It’s the most famous bone.”
  • [54:55] Frank: “Are teeth bones? No, those are enamel.”
  • [56:21] Joe: “They only make up the top part. Specifically, the upper third. Yeah, the bridge, bro.”
  • [67:26] Joe: “Ribs. Spine. Dude, spine. Isn’t the spine...there’s fluid in it, bro.”

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Classic Basement Yard Antics & Banter

• Mutual Teasing:

  • Joe, Frank, and Antonio poke fun at each other’s knowledge, quirks, and even clothes, with running gags about intelligence, nightstand contents, and merchandise wardrobe.
  • Frank to Antonio: “I'm back to thinking you're a fucking idiot.” [61:42]

• On Bowing:

  • After an apology, they explore “bowing” as a sign of respect, riffing on cultural customs and even contemplating etiquette if meeting Hideki Matsui. [58:00–59:25]

• Fidget Habits:

  • Confessions of finger picking, fidget spinners, and sensory shirt shopping. [62:51–63:36]

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Memorable (and Wildest) Moments

• On Trying to Suck Your Own Wiener:

  • Joe asks the ultimate Basement Yard question: “You ever try to suck your own wiener?” [69:37–73:28]
    • Frank: “Once you open it, it’s…Pandora’s box. Once you pop, you can’t stop. Is it actually possible?”
    • Antonio: “That’s masturbation plus. That’s a premium account.” [72:43]

• On Sibling Closeness:

  • The crew wonders at the limits of sibling affection and when it gets “a little wild.” [49:20–50:01]
    • Joe: “You guys are two years apart and both, like, in your mid-twenties and sitting on each other's laps is a little wild to me.”

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Notable Quotes in Context

| Timestamp | Quote | Speaker | |-----------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------|------------------| | [03:39] | “When it comes to having to piss in the middle of the night, logic escapes.” | Frank Alvarez | | [04:34] | “When you finally get the chance to pee, your penis is like, ‘we’re gonna let it out slower than normal.’” | Joe Santagado | | [08:57] | “This was like a year ago, bro.” (re: chocolate milk in bed) | Antonio Prisco | | [13:12] | “Spoiled milk smells up there with the worst smell.” | Frank Alvarez | | [22:15] | “If this is the blanket, I like, roll it up and put it in between my legs.” | Frank Alvarez | | [26:20] | “They would give you a candle and you'd walk the streets with this candle for, like, St. Catherine or St. Demetrius.” | Frank Alvarez | | [37:14] | “If this is your sister, that's a crazy pose.” | Joe Santagado | | [44:23] | “I think I got one, and you got one. We both single-handedly got one.” | Frank Alvarez | | [54:03] | “You think I don’t know what a femur is? It’s the most famous bone.” | Joe Santagado | | [61:42] | “I'm back to thinking you're a fucking idiot.” | Frank Alvarez | | [69:41] | “You ever try to suck your own wiener?” | Joe Santagado | | [72:43] | “That's masturbation plus. That's a premium account.” | Antonio Prisco |

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Segment Timestamps

• 00:30–06:28: Pee holding, bed habits, stolen nightstand water
• 06:28–12:03: Nightstand confessions, coffee spill stories, beverage rules
• 12:03–16:26: In-bed eating, forbidden snacks, kid messes
• 16:26–23:45: Nightlight talk, smart homes, wax musings
• 23:45–34:01: Candlelit vigils, retro soda nostalgia
• 34:27–47:02: Siblings or Dating—game segment, discussion, and wildest photo poses
• 47:02–59:01: Sibling closeness, bone naming, apology & bowing rituals
• 59:01–65:48: More merch chat, fidgeting, and escalating comedic bits
• 65:48–69:13: Bone trivia, spine fluid, anatomical confusion
• 69:37–73:28: Trying to suck your own wiener: the philosophical and practical debate
• 73:28–76:00: Wrapping up with football, final bows, and goodbyes

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Conclusion

The episode is a rollicking mix of gross-out humor, sincere friendship, and unfiltered curiosities. From bathroom shenanigans to deeply silly anatomical discussions, and an endless stream of inside jokes, this week’s Basement Yard feels like hanging out in the back room with your funniest friends—completely unpredictable, a little chaotic, and always entertaining.

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Find the Hosts

• Frank Alvarez: @thefrankalvarez [75:22]
• Joe Santagado: @joesantagado
• Antonio Prisco: @auntprisco

And follow the show: @basemyard (TikTok & Instagram)

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Transcript

[Ad Host]

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[Frank Alvarez]

Welcome back to the basement.

[Joe Santagado]

Welcome back to the basement yard. Oh, oh, oh, oh.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was, you know what? I was doing it and then I started cleaning and then I'm doing it back again. I should have pissed. Oh, I should have peed before I should have pissed.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, you're locked in now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hold it.

[Joe Santagado]

I'll hold it till the ads don't hold it physically.

[Frank Alvarez]

And did you used to do that as a kid? Did you pinch your little pee pee?

[Joe Santagado]

What? You would pinch your wiener?

[Antonio Prisco]

Let me just. One minute of ten seconds in.

[Joe Santagado]

Okay, okay, okay. You would pinch your wiener.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, wait, is it you who said

[Joe Santagado]

that you used to stop your pee in the middle of peeing by pinching your wiener? There is a red handed,

[Frank Alvarez]

There is a tone coming from your voice that is that you, not me. Now, I'm not like now cutting it off just to fucking for shits and gigs.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I have at times been able to, you know, pinch it, close the door, you know, close the storm drain or whatever they say. Oh, door, hold the door, you know. But, but yeah, you didn't do that as a kid when you had to pee. You would like.

[Joe Santagado]

I would just kind of like fiddle with it. What?

[Frank Alvarez]

See, that's weirder. That's weird. The pinching makes sense.

[Joe Santagado]

No, it doesn't.

[Frank Alvarez]

I feel like when I have to pee, I can buy myself 10 minutes of not having to pee by like,

[Joe Santagado]

like, like holding your breath.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like. No, like breathing the piss back into my body. You know what? I know. Don't do this thing that you guys do sitting in your ivory tower looking down at me like I'm a fucking idiot.

[Joe Santagado]

I can't breathe my piss back into my body. Sue me.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can't like, and then like, absorb some of your pee again when I,

[Joe Santagado]

when I have to pee? You know what I do if I

[Frank Alvarez]

got to pee really bad?

[Joe Santagado]

You know how you get that, like, pain kind of. Yeah. The only thing that kind of relieves that pain is if I stand like this.

[Frank Alvarez]

Just break the whole Set.

[Antonio Prisco]

Like, if I.

[Joe Santagado]

If I stand like this. So, like. Like, I have to, like, be bent over.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, because when you're standing up straight, you're putting pressure on. Yeah, see? Like, you're putting pressure.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm like. I'm, like, throwing my shit back.

[Frank Alvarez]

You fucking throwing it back on them.

[Joe Santagado]

Ye.

[Frank Alvarez]

So, okay, I guess that kind of,

[Joe Santagado]

like, relieves some sort of pain. But, like, when I'm sitting, I do

[Frank Alvarez]

get that because, like, if I'm sitting and I have to pee, sometimes I'll, like, unbuckle everything, pull, like. Like the waist of my pants out.

[Joe Santagado]

Yep.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, so I'm in, like, a more natural sitting position.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Antonio Prisco]

If I wake up and I have to pee and I'm on my left side, I could buy myself, like, five minutes. If I roll around to the other side. I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because it has to drain back into its pee position.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, something like that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know. I'm with you. There I am. I'm honestly with you.

[Joe Santagado]

You're like, five feet from our b.

[Frank Alvarez]

How do you know his bedroom?

[Joe Santagado]

I mean, I'm assuming there's a bathroom.

[Frank Alvarez]

Our bathroom. Like, you guys just sleep together. What? That would be crazy, right?

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, I said you're. I said a bathroom. It could be eight feet.

[Frank Alvarez]

You don't know. I'm. Sometimes.

[Joe Santagado]

The point is that it's close.

[Antonio Prisco]

See, I just don't want to get up sometimes.

[Frank Alvarez]

When it comes to. Yes, exactly. When it comes to having to piss in the middle of the night, logic escapes. Just for being able to sleep comfortably longer. And in a deeper sense, I do

[Joe Santagado]

close my eyes and pee sitting down in the middle of the night.

[Frank Alvarez]

Sure. Whatever works for you. But what I'm saying is, like, I will push. I will push having to pee in the night until, like, I'm getting to that. That point of a dream where I'm, like, in front of a urinal and I'm like, all right, now I know if I piss in this urinal, I'm gonna actually piss the bed.

[Antonio Prisco]

I.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, I actually get this part because if it's the middle of the night and I have to pee, I will hold my piss until I'm, like, hallucinating from pain. And then I'll go.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I don't know if that's a good thing to do. I think we've learned from it doesn't happen often. I mean, hallucinating. That seems like you're way past, like, the threshold for having to do that

[Joe Santagado]

exaggerating comedy show.

[Frank Alvarez]

I didn't Know if you were actually seeing stars when you piss?

[Joe Santagado]

No, no, no. But you know, you have to pee real bad, and then you finally get the chance to pee, and you're. And your penis is like, we're gonna let it out slower than normal.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Like, it like my. My dick blue balls me. You know, it's like, okay,

[Joe Santagado]

you want

[Frank Alvarez]

a peace so bad, don't you? Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

It's like, here's a little bit of pee.

[Frank Alvarez]

You're going at my pace, bitch.

[Joe Santagado]

Like, when you just, like, have to pee and, like, you go. It's like you get a pee in your business.

[Frank Alvarez]

I could power wash some pavers with my piss.

[Joe Santagado]

I know, but then when you really have to pee and you've been holding it for so long and you finally get out of the Uber, and then you run into your room and running the room, and then you run to your bathroom, and then you take a pee. It's like, it's got to warm up.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm telling you right now. Like, I would be afraid to sit when I pee because, like, at that level, when you're saying, like, in the middle of the night, because I would have to aim this thing straight down because that stream will come out the front of my fucking toilet seat. You know what I'm saying? This thing, it's like 4.4000psi of piss.

[Joe Santagado]

Whose voice is that? 40. 40,000.

[Frank Alvarez]

40,000 psi? Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

No. Middle of the night, I'm sitting down, I'm closing my eyes, and I'm trying to stay in a dream while I am peeing.

[Frank Alvarez]

If you could take a pill that, like, would guarantee you don't have to piss during the night, would you take it nightly?

[Joe Santagado]

I don't pee in the night often.

[Antonio Prisco]

Really?

[Frank Alvarez]

I piss at least once a night.

[Joe Santagado]

I would say I only pee in the middle of the night if, like, I had drank a lot of water.

[Frank Alvarez]

See, the thing is, like, I don't. I've gotten better with drinking more fluids during the day. But Becca every night has a bottle, like, a bottle of ice water next to, like, on her nightstand. So I'm more likely to be in bed and drink water because she has it in us right there. You know what I mean?

[Joe Santagado]

You take her water.

[Frank Alvarez]

So I'll take her water, and then I won't give it back and I'll say, no water for you.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm gonna get up and.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, but, like, it's right there. So, like, I probably drink more consistently when I'm lying in bed than when I do during the day.

[Antonio Prisco]

What was the most annoying thing you've ever knocked over on your nightstand next to your bed.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, Becca. All right, this is a real story. And this was like one of the first arguments we got into.

[Joe Santagado]

What could this be?

[Frank Alvarez]

This is a real thing. And I want you to tell me where you where. Like, if you agree with me or probably her, I can.

[Joe Santagado]

Before we begin. I'm on her side.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay.

[Joe Santagado]

All right, I'll pick.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, I'll jump on that, too.

[Frank Alvarez]

We. It was when we were, like, first dating. We were maybe like a little. A little over. A little under a year into dating, and she, like, spent the night at my place, and she had gotten a nice coffee, and I don't know if your partners are like this, but she takes two sips of her coffee and then she. She needs her big coffee and takes two sips and she's like, I've had enough there. And I've had enough. I'm like, just get a smaller coffee, dude. And she left it on my nightstand. And I went to make my bed. And Again, this is 24 year old Frankie, so cut me some fucking slack, okay? And I went to make my bed, and in throwing my blanket, I knocked it over and it fell on the floor.

[Joe Santagado]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

And I was pissed at myself, but also I said to her, I was like, next time, don't leave coffee on my nightstand. And I think now that I'm saying it out loud, I realize I was a douchebag in that moment.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, I don't. I think.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't think that was that.

[Joe Santagado]

I thought it was gonna be way.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, that was gonna be way worse. I think you're still. You're.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm leaning you, so really keep going. So, like, I knocked it over and it was my fault, but also her fault.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, not her fault.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I get.

[Joe Santagado]

I get you being like, you know,

[Frank Alvarez]

like, it's not like, don't leave it

[Joe Santagado]

on my nightstand because I like to

[Frank Alvarez]

make my bed really hard. Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

You know, it's not like, you know, you were looking for. To have to cushion some of the.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think I was just in a pissy mood that day and probably was just having a bad day. And I was just like this. And this happened because of you. I make my bed hard.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I may. I'm fluffing it.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, I was laying down, whipped the blanket off me. Chocolate milk all over any.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, you're a grown adult with a

[Joe Santagado]

glass of chocolate milk on your knife.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why are you drinking milk on your nights? It was a red solo cup even.

[Joe Santagado]

Crazy.

[Antonio Prisco]

It Was a red solo cup of chocolate milk.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Honestly, you're not helping.

[Joe Santagado]

What is the occasion? How does that call for?

[Frank Alvarez]

Were you 12?

[Joe Santagado]

It was.

[Antonio Prisco]

It was just. It just. There was chocolate milk there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Were you 12?

[Antonio Prisco]

I was not 12.

[Frank Alvarez]

How old were you?

[Antonio Prisco]

This was like a year ago, bro.

[Joe Santagado]

Why are you doing.

[Frank Alvarez]

That is crazy.

[Antonio Prisco]

This is like a year ago.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I understand. Like, you can get away milk to

[Joe Santagado]

bed like a kid.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Like, what are you. You're just like, you have. Oh, let me go get my warm

[Joe Santagado]

glass of chocolate milk.

[Frank Alvarez]

Have you ever done that before bed? Like, actually. Because you thought it was going to help you sleep, had warm milk. No, I've done that.

[Joe Santagado]

Warm milk is disgusting.

[Frank Alvarez]

There were, like, nights in college where I like, couldn't fall asleep, so I would just like, microwave a cup of milk for like 30 seconds and drink it.

[Joe Santagado]

Why wouldn't you just have tea or something?

[Frank Alvarez]

It was college. Like, you know, what's on hand is on hand. You know, I didn't have much going on. Yeah, you did.

[Joe Santagado]

You drink it out of a saucer. Yeah, Lapped it up.

[Frank Alvarez]

Not a fucking red solo cup like Asher Roth over here.

[Antonio Prisco]

Don't start tossing things at me.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, no. That's kind of wild for having chocolate milk.

[Antonio Prisco]

The coolest guys never.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I'm sure.

[Antonio Prisco]

Anything in your bedroom?

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, yeah, of course. I've spilled mad in my bedroom. I mean, water. I usually try to keep water on my nightstand in the middle of the night, too. Because if you wake up and then, you know, you, like in the middle of the night, you're just thirsty. When I have like a cold thing of war and then you have like, freezing cold water and then you're so thirsty. I'm sucking this thing down and it's. I shouldn't have done that. But like, I was. I'm like drinking this thing and it tastes so good and it makes me cool.

[Frank Alvarez]

I love that. You can do it.

[Joe Santagado]

Go ahead.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, you get.

[Antonio Prisco]

You get them.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was just going to say, like, it's the.

[Joe Santagado]

It's the.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like coffee, chocolate milk, those types. Like, that color of liquid that is the worst because then it stains. Like, if it's water, I don't give a fuck.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. I never have something that isn't water in my bedroom. Like, I don't drink and eat in my bed.

[Antonio Prisco]

Danny one time he had body wash on his nightstand. And in the middle of the night

[Joe Santagado]

is happening in the house.

[Frank Alvarez]

What's going on in your body wash on his nightstand.

[Joe Santagado]

In case. Why? So wash his pits in the Middle of the night.

[Antonio Prisco]

I don't know why he had it, but in the middle of night he was so thirsty. Fully.

[Frank Alvarez]

Stop, Stop fully.

[Antonio Prisco]

I promise, this is his story.

[Frank Alvarez]

Was he inebriated?

[Antonio Prisco]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Did he have a couple to tree?

[Antonio Prisco]

I don't know. I think he's just a kind of a weird dude.

[Frank Alvarez]

But I've had like, I've had beer on my nightstand where like I'm like the night before, like, you know, having a party, having beers or whatever. Then I just like go to my bed and I unexpectedly fall asleep. I've had beer. Like that. Sure.

[Joe Santagado]

Tea.

[Frank Alvarez]

I've had tea on my nightstand. I've had tea also, you know, but not just chocolate milk. Like you're a, like a war veteran from the 40s. Is crazy. Is hilarious. Honestly, that's like, like you drinking your, you drinking your Opal Teen. That's like having a plate of spaghetti on your nightstand. Oh, that would be bad. I don't.

[Joe Santagado]

In your nightstand.

[Frank Alvarez]

Honestly, a weird collection of stuff. Like a charger or like an old charger.

[Joe Santagado]

Anything cool.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's like a, like a journal that I never wrote in that I always said that's where we go, though. Yeah, that I always said, like, I would try writing in and do journaling, but yeah, not, not much. Cool.

[Joe Santagado]

It's kind of like a messy drawer. Mine's messy too. Yeah, but I have all the, like, you remember I said I don't throw out the funeral cards. They're all in my nightstand.

[Frank Alvarez]

All of them. Like, so you, when you get new nightstands, you transfer funeral cards from nightstand to nightstand?

[Joe Santagado]

I don't do that actively. It just ends up being there. Where else am I going to put them?

[Frank Alvarez]

That's spooky.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, it's like you have a bunch of people sleeping in your room with you.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. At least none of them are drinking chocolate milk.

[Joe Santagado]

All right, what are we doing?

[Frank Alvarez]

Like a, like an alleyway cat? Dude. I, I, I will say, like, I learned very quickly, like, I'm big now on like, no eating in our bed. Although Ruby ate in our bed this morning. But whatever we could do to like, get her to go to school. But like, there was one night where I got home, we did, we had like a double up day and I got home late and the girls were in my, you know, our room and they were like, they both wanted cereal, so I gave them bowls of cereal and they, I was like, all right, you have to have it on the floor. And I walked out and I came back and Ruby Spilled hers. And I. As I was cleaning that one out, Maeve spilled hers. I was like, never again. I'm not doing this. Yeah, because with milk, you don't need to just worry about it staining. But then the smell, if you don't, like, properly. Oh, my God. Spoiled milk smells up there with the worst smell.

[Joe Santagado]

Those are one of those stinks that I don't even like like sometimes. We talked about it.

[Frank Alvarez]

We talked about it. Oh, there's no good. Like, milk stink is not good.

[Joe Santagado]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what? Stink is so good. And stinky basement stink. You know what I'm talking about? It's like a little wet and mildewy down there and like.

[Joe Santagado]

Ugh.

[Frank Alvarez]

You don't like that?

[Joe Santagado]

I don't think so.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I love.

[Joe Santagado]

You love mildew.

[Frank Alvarez]

Not currently, but, like in old basements. Like, you're just like, oh, this is a. Because they say rule of thumb for when you guys are buying houses. All basements get water just about how you protect against it. So, like, when you're down there, it's like, it's stinky, like a little wet mildew basement.

[Ad Host]

Little hole.

[Joe Santagado]

Yo, you're. You're scaring me and him.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, I'm very scared.

[Joe Santagado]

What's in your nightstand? Do I even want to know?

[Frank Alvarez]

Chocolate milk?

[Antonio Prisco]

It's just nightstand things. Stuff you might need. I don't know.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, I know. Your answer is what I'm worried about.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, it's just nothing. Nothing crazy.

[Joe Santagado]

No Titan?

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah. Oh, nothing. That's really.

[Frank Alvarez]

No. What did you just say?

[Antonio Prisco]

Some extra batteries sometimes for TV remote.

[Frank Alvarez]

TV remote? Is that. Is that what you need the batteries for? Anal bead? Yeah. Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

There we go.

[Frank Alvarez]

You got some stuff in there, huh?

[Antonio Prisco]

I'm pretty sure he has a picture of you in his nightstand, so.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I'm not dead yet, so he wouldn't have a picture of me, but as soon as I die, he will. Yeah. Do you have a picture of me hung up in your house anywhere? I'm trying to think if I do. I don't think I.

[Antonio Prisco]

It would be like a group thing.

[Joe Santagado]

I do, I do.

[Frank Alvarez]

You do? I do.

[Joe Santagado]

I do. My conscious was in your body. I do. Yeah. I have. I don't know. Someone. Did you get someone? Or maybe you did someone. Oh, no, it was Lynch. I don't actually, I have no idea. It's a picture of us on stage at. In Wilmot. But it's like when we went to shoot the promo video.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh.

[Joe Santagado]

So the first time we were on a stage.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gotcha.

[Joe Santagado]

Gotcha.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gotcha.

[Joe Santagado]

Gotcha. So it was like a picture from the back? Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Huh. Interesting.

[Joe Santagado]

No pictures of me hung up in you, huh?

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I can't think of. I honestly. I know I have some, but I don't know if I have them hung up yet. We're still. We just moved in, like, 10 months ago. Come on, Joe. We've only been there for a whole year.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, you got to give me some slack.

[Frank Alvarez]

Wait.

[Joe Santagado]

Damn.

[Frank Alvarez]

So we're finding out. Ants got some shit in his nightstand. I kind of. And you getting down like that, baby?

[Antonio Prisco]

No, it's really nothing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, the nightstand is.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's very tiny.

[Frank Alvarez]

Stop. Stop me when I'm getting close to the size.

[Joe Santagado]

Wow. Do you have pictures up in your room?

[Antonio Prisco]

No.

[Joe Santagado]

Like, on the walls.

[Frank Alvarez]

Do you? We have some art, and we have an aura frame. Free plug. They're actually amazing.

[Joe Santagado]

Nice.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

Ooh, night light.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, because I'm an adult. I am big guy.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm an adult.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm an adult.

[Joe Santagado]

Do you have a nightlight? Do you have one of those in the. In the bathroom?

[Frank Alvarez]

We have, like, a setting on the light that you could put on night light mode. But, like, if you could find that button, you can. You just turn the switch. You know what I mean?

[Joe Santagado]

At that point, you're seeing in the dark.

[Frank Alvarez]

Ruby and Miles have, like, sound machines that have lights that come from them. Maeve sleeps with a light on.

[Antonio Prisco]

I think I said. I think I've said this. Full light on.

[Frank Alvarez]

She is vampire, that child.

[Antonio Prisco]

I think I've said this before, but I still have my light up like stars. In one of the rooms. No, no, not in my bedroom.

[Frank Alvarez]

Not in my bedroom. Wait, are you saying. You know, he's too old for those. Okay. Yeah. Antonio, first of all, he's sleeping in

[Joe Santagado]

a bedroom with star ceiling and chocolate

[Frank Alvarez]

milk on his knife and then fucking vibrators in the nightstand. He's gonna walk in and arrest you.

[Joe Santagado]

Graffiti pajamas, too.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's not my bedroom. It's in, like, what used to be my old bedroom. I just never took them down.

[Frank Alvarez]

What you had. So who's in there now? Danny?

[Antonio Prisco]

No, no, no, no. It's just like a. An office kind of thing now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay. So you could be working.

[Joe Santagado]

You know, I used to have one of those.

[Frank Alvarez]

Those things are so cool. We got them recently and then lost them.

[Joe Santagado]

My parents hated when we had those because they put them up and I peeled them off and they were. There goes the paint.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Yeah, that definitely happened at our place, too.

[Joe Santagado]

Did I ever tell you about the

[Frank Alvarez]

time

[Joe Santagado]

there was One time where. You know how I used to get leaks in my house?

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, yeah, I remember that.

[Joe Santagado]

So my bedroom. I was sleeping on the top bunk, my room. And our room was leaking, right? And it's the middle of the night, and, like, it's a pretty substantial leak. Like, it's like. Water's coming in, so I had to wake up my dad. He's livid, like, furious that this is happening, right? So he. It's like a little drip. He's like, oh, he's got to be. And then he. I'm on the top bunk, and I can see this is all happening, like, in the dark, but the. The light from the hallway is, like, casting on his face. And he takes the drill.

[Frank Alvarez]

He drills into the ceiling, and water just comes down, like, on his face. He goes like this.

[Joe Santagado]

And then he just looks at me, and I lost my soaking wet face. So furious. It's like 3am There's a hole in my ceiling. Now it's just pouring water.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, that was a thing that I remember my dad. I don't know if it was my dad or my mom, but, like, seeing a leak and then, like, poking it with, like. Yeah, you know, a pen or a drill or something to, like, so get the rest of it, I guess. I don't know how that makes sense.

[Joe Santagado]

I have it, like, etched in my mind. Of his face covered in water.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, he's soaking wet. Oh, my God.

[Joe Santagado]

There was another time with my dad. This is a similar story, but we were redoing the bathroom upstairs, and my dad was in the kitchen.

[Frank Alvarez]

He's going.

[Joe Santagado]

He's telling me and Keith. He's like, go upstairs with this, like, a jug. And he's like, pour water down the drain. I want to see if there's a leak or whatever the. Right. So there. But there was a leak, so he's underneath it. He's like, all right, pour a little bit, right? He's yelling because he's trying to get through the floor. We can hear him totally fine. So we start pouring, and he starts yelling, stop. And me and Keith look at each other at the same time and both decide we're, like, not going to stop.

[Frank Alvarez]

No way we're stopping, yo.

[Joe Santagado]

He's screaming at the top of his lungs, stop.

[Frank Alvarez]

Stop dumping water on his face, bro. It was. We're going, what? He's soaking wet,

[Joe Santagado]

This guy. Yeah, he was, though.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's his father.

[Joe Santagado]

It's my dad.

[Frank Alvarez]

That is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's funny, bro.

[Joe Santagado]

It was so funny.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm just. I'm more confused and amazed at this. Confusing. Bro, if someone. If your house was on room Raiders, people will be like, what the fuck?

[Joe Santagado]

They go to Danny's room.

[Frank Alvarez]

Body wash, chocolate milk, Fucking glow in the dark, stars in the ceiling. Then they open your side of the nightstand and there's giant fucking vibrators.

[Antonio Prisco]

Mm, mm, mm.

[Frank Alvarez]

How many pillows do you sleep with?

[Antonio Prisco]

3.

[Joe Santagado]

You got 3.

[Frank Alvarez]

I got normally 2.

[Joe Santagado]

You get 1 in the legs, though, right?

[Frank Alvarez]

Legs. Or. Or, you know, you hook.

[Joe Santagado]

You get one in a headlock.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Like full Nelson. And then I got one on my head.

[Joe Santagado]

I go toe.

[Antonio Prisco]

Well, I don't have. It's probably not great either, but, like, mine.

[Joe Santagado]

Tell me you don't have sheets on your pillows and I'll come over there.

[Antonio Prisco]

I have sheets on my pillows. It's normal.

[Frank Alvarez]

Sheets on the bed.

[Antonio Prisco]

My bed's up against the wall.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, headboard.

[Antonio Prisco]

I have a headboard.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, you were about to get it. He was about to get it. You saw that, right?

[Antonio Prisco]

I have a headboard. It's up against the wall. So I put a pillow to, like, stop stuff from falling over in between the wall and the bed.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, my God.

[Frank Alvarez]

Wait, what?

[Antonio Prisco]

Does that make sense?

[Frank Alvarez]

Why would there be a giant. I understand we have a wedge pillow thing.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, yeah. I use a pillow as a wedge pillow.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, we have like. They sell, like, big. Like, it looks like a right triangle and it's a pillow, and you, like, put it there so nothing falls in between your bed. And I know what you're saying feels

[Joe Santagado]

like a design issue.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, yeah. I mean, but you can't really tell that when you're buying the bed frame or the headboard or something like that. So like.

[Antonio Prisco]

Or if the bottom of the wall has that weird little molding so you can't really get the bed all the way.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

[Joe Santagado]

Correct.

[Antonio Prisco]

Nothing you can do about it happens.

[Joe Santagado]

Not you could do about it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, God.

[Joe Santagado]

You gonna do. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I also sleep in an ice cold room because Becca likes the fan on every night.

[Joe Santagado]

Same fan. I don't like wind, but I like cold.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, I don't like sleeping in cold.

[Joe Santagado]

I don't like the wind on my face.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't like it.

[Joe Santagado]

Do you sleep? Do you ever put the covers over your head?

[Frank Alvarez]

No, No, I don't. I would be too afraid of that, honestly.

[Antonio Prisco]

Sometimes I do. I put it like this and I go like that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I put your face out.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, you gotta stick your face out.

[Frank Alvarez]

I. I put my. Like, if this is the blanket, I take my end of the Blanket. And I like, roll it up and put it in between my legs.

[Joe Santagado]

So you're not even under him?

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I am. So I'm under it, but like, it comes to like a. Like it fucking curls around me.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, like you packed in like a sardine.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like a little burrito.

[Joe Santagado]

Like a little Colombian sardine.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Yeah, I love that. Oh, my God. You know what I was thinking the other day because I was burning a candle. This is so out of left field. Yeah. What the fuck is wax?

[Joe Santagado]

Oil, isn't it?

[Frank Alvarez]

But it's wax, though. It's not oil. Oil is liquid. It's the liquidy.

[Joe Santagado]

When you harden it, it becomes wax. Like when you burn a candle. And then like, it's like.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but at room temperature, it's hard. You. You could freeze something really cold to make it hard. Like, where the does wax come from? I know there's beeswax, but, like, is that. That's not wax? Wax?

[Joe Santagado]

Maybe there's stuff added to it that makes it hard.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, what the fuck is wax then?

[Joe Santagado]

It's. It's oil with some shit.

[Frank Alvarez]

But they've had wax. You're talking about modern engineered candles. They've had candles from fucking the Mediterranean. No, what is medieval Mediterranean? Yeah. What is that?

[Joe Santagado]

It's just.

[Frank Alvarez]

Where are they getting medieval wax?

[Joe Santagado]

It's probably oil and some other shit, and you just mix it and then it can harden.

[Frank Alvarez]

But what?

[Joe Santagado]

I don't know.

[Antonio Prisco]

Isn't it weird that you can melt a candle, catch the oil, harden it, and there's the candle again.

[Joe Santagado]

What's that? Can you does it.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, it evaporates eventually.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's like a little bit shorter, but it's right there.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can create a forever candle. Like if you have like. I've seen, like, there are like candle dishes where it's like a stick on the top and then like a bowl on the bottom, and once the stick melts, it goes into the bottom and it basically creates a second candle.

[Joe Santagado]

That's kind of cool. Honestly, like, I love those long white candles and when they burn and then it gets like. Like on the sides, it looks like Halloween. It reminds me of like. Like, oh, there's like an old poisonous woman who. Yes. You know, but then they would give

[Frank Alvarez]

it to us for, like, our friend went missing in the neighborhood. And they would be like, kids sit there and don't play with these candles that are in your hand that look awesome. And we're sitting there and there's a Dixie cup on the bottom of it, and we're like, yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

If you.

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[Joe Santagado]

Ever been to a vigil? Those are good candles.

[Frank Alvarez]

Great candles. Bad reason to light them. Yeah, I mean, I guess a good reason to light them. To visualize.

[Joe Santagado]

One time I. I think I walked in the Greek thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh yeah, the Greek.

[Joe Santagado]

They got good candles too.

[Frank Alvarez]

And they, they've got a lot of candles and they smell different from normal candles. They smell like Greek church candles.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I was baptized in a Greek church, so I know.

[Joe Santagado]

Why did I walk in that? That was not.

[Frank Alvarez]

It was like a cool thing to do. Like. So what Joey's referencing is Asoria. I don't know what it is now, but growing up it was like the biggest Greek, like concentrated community outside of Greece. And we had a lot of Greek churches and what they would do for

[Joe Santagado]

like Easter or something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Easter. And I'm sure there were other holidays too. They would just do straight full on parades. But they would walk like a block

[Joe Santagado]

and it was like in the middle of the street.

[Frank Alvarez]

I remember middle of the street.

[Joe Santagado]

I was at a bar one time and I turned around, I was like, what's going on? I thought it was a culture. Yeah, yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

They were coming for you. Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

I was like, there's people with candles

[Frank Alvarez]

in the street, but they were also short. They were like two or three blocks.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And you would walk and like if you were a part of the Greek church, they'd be like. And they'd give you a candle and you'd walk the streets with this candle for like St. Catherine or St. Demetrius.

[Joe Santagado]

Definitely wasn't Catherine.

[Frank Alvarez]

No. They got St. Catherine churches. Do they?

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, I know. St. Dimitri. Us.

[Frank Alvarez]

Demetrius, Demetrio. Thank Katarina.

[Joe Santagado]

I mean, Catherine isn't.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's Katarina. Yeah, I guess. Saint Yus, Saint Gyro.

[Joe Santagado]

Stavros.

[Frank Alvarez]

Stavros. Dimitri, Dimitri, Stavros. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

But yeah, that was naming people.

[Frank Alvarez]

I just, I. I'm not even kidding. Where I did not. I had like 10 minutes where I was like, where in God's name does wax come from? Because everything comes from somewhere.

[Joe Santagado]

I think it's like oils, but it's like there's probably other stuff mixed in with it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, but how did they know that back in Medieval times, they were mixing

[Joe Santagado]

all types of shit. I mean they figured out how much stuff they made. Wine. How the fuck do you figure that out? I just left this thing here.

[Frank Alvarez]

Left grape juice for a couple days. They were like whoa ways again.

[Joe Santagado]

But why would they leave it?

[Frank Alvarez]

Because they forgotten because they're drunk.

[Joe Santagado]

And then they, they also made mead.

[Frank Alvarez]

I want to have Meadow.

[Joe Santagado]

It sounds disgusting.

[Frank Alvarez]

It just sounds like a sweeter wine.

[Joe Santagado]

It sounds like it's like earthy.

[Antonio Prisco]

My friend tried to make meat in his closet once.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's this guy.

[Joe Santagado]

Who do you hang out with?

[Frank Alvarez]

There's this guy, it happens. There's this guy on TikTok that makes mead but out of different like he'll make like a Mountain Dew mead or a like grape juice wine like using like store bought juices and sodas.

[Joe Santagado]

I bet the Mountain Dew meat is good.

[Frank Alvarez]

I can't, I can't imagine it's bad.

[Joe Santagado]

It's probably extremely alcoholic.

[Frank Alvarez]

I haven't, I haven't had a Mountain Dew and like sit down, buy a Mountain Dew, have the whole thing in like 20 years. What other places you have like a sip. Like if someone has a Mountain Dew and I'm just like, oh, let me have a sip of Mountain Dew. But that Mountain Dew that I had, that 20 years ago made quite the impact on me.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Because I to this day now forgotten it.

[Joe Santagado]

Any sort of drink that has like an electric color, like a, an electric green or electric blue. I'm like, God, that's probably fantastic.

[Frank Alvarez]

Do you remember mellow yellow?

[Joe Santagado]

What's that?

[Frank Alvarez]

It was like the other, it was like the other brand drink or what was the ex Explode or something like that. There was like the. Because you know how it's like Pepsi and Coke.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

The like other brand Mountain Dew was

[Joe Santagado]

called like somewhat an X.

[Frank Alvarez]

Something with an X. I remember seeing the bottle and there was just a big black X on it.

[Joe Santagado]

I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Are you looking that up? Trying extreme. Yeah. And they would like give it out with like Xbox, you know at like Gamestop. You're like here, take this copy of Blinks the time sweeper and have an explode

[Joe Santagado]

Blinks the time sweeper.

[Frank Alvarez]

That was a great game.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's an explode energy drink.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, Maybe it was a surge. Surge. It might have been. No, it wasn't Surge.

[Joe Santagado]

Wasn't surge like a 7Up.

[Frank Alvarez]

Look up. Mid 2000s Mountain Dew knockoff brand drink from the mid 2000s.

[Antonio Prisco]

Mountain Lightning?

[Frank Alvarez]

No, Mountain Lightning.

[Joe Santagado]

Honestly, they should sue them. Mountain lighting.

[Frank Alvarez]

Close enough. But like if you got the. Do you you're not. If you got the lightning, you got to do. You got the do. You might not have the lightning.

[Joe Santagado]

I don't even know what that means. But we do have some sponsors. Speaking of, we have Squarespace. Okay. Squarespace is a website where you're going to build your website. All right? If you have an E commerce business or a retail or whatever it is, you need a professional looking website. We use Squarespace for all of our stuff because we think that they make the best looking websites and it's very easy because they have templates. Okay, I can just go on to this website and I pick it out and I say, okay, that's the one I want it to kind of look like. I switch out all the text and pictures to make sure it has all the stuff that I need on there and then you upload the website and you're good to go. But it's very important to have a good looking website. And like I said, I've used Squarespace numerous times and it's very easy. I like that they have a lot of tools to let me know where the traffic's coming from and how many people this and that. There's a lot of metrics and analytics that you get also with Squarespace as well. So they're kind of an all in one. If you're running a website or you have a business, you're going to want to use them. So you can head to squarespace.com basement to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain when you use that code basement. So build your website, head on over to squarespace.com basement save 10% off your purchase of a website or domain when you use that code basement. All right, so enjoy that. This podcast is also sponsored by Better Help. Better Help is online therapy. So if you want to see a therapist and you want to be onboarded pretty quickly, they have a pretty quick turnaround for getting onboarded with them. And yeah, it is, I will say, more affordable than a lot of in person therapy, which can be really expensive, like hundreds of dollars per session. But yeah, so this is like more affordable than that. And there's a lot of access as well. They have over 30,000 therapists. I'm a bit big advocate for therapy. I think that everyone should be in it. I've been in it for years now and I think it's great. But yeah, so go check them out. BetterHelp and you can sign up and get 10 [e-mail] Basemanyard that is betterhelp.com Basemyard Save 10 off. So go do it. All right? Go get some help. Go talk to a therapist.

[Frank Alvarez]

Betterhelp.combaseMyard and if you're working on yourself, you want to have things around you that are making you happy and smile and you know what might help with that? If you're listening to this show, you know my help. More vase. The basement Yard Basement yard started. Joey not gonna do it. Listen, go to patreon.com the basementyard and you get more of us. And you had extra of us too. Some of us you got a couple extra inches like ant

[Joe Santagado]

Jesus.

[Frank Alvarez]

You can go over to patreon.com the basement yard check out the service. All right, we got different tiers and each of those tiers have different things that you'll get if you join those tiers that first here you get these weekly episodes one week in advance, the seven whole days. So when you know, when you scroll on social media and you're like, oh my God, this is a new clip. Frankie looks more like Jason Momoa every single day. And he looks the most like him in this episode. Well, what is that? That's the new episode that the Patreon members get access to for that tier one subscription seven whole days before anybody else. And that tier two subscription you'll also get the seven whole days thing. But then on Fridays you get exclusive episodes every single Friday. So you can start and end your week with the basement yard and then you got Santa gotta studios videos in between there. We're all over you. We're everywhere for you. So go check it out. Patreon.com the Basement Yard thank you guys for the overwhelming amount of love and support it is keeping the lights on here and is helping us get the opportunity to, to, to plan and do some cool things for you. It helps out a lot. So thank you. And if you want to sign up, go to patreon.com the basement yard on a web browser if you use a smart app. Well, the tech overlords are going to, you know, have to take extra money from us to feed their lizard mouths. I don't know what they do with it, but you could save yourself a couple extra bucks if you go to patreon.com the basement yard on a web browser and sign up that way. It's kind of a no brainer. Thank you guys. We are so appreciated, so appreciative of the love and all the support. So appreciative. That doesn't sound right. We really appreciate it. How's that Sound. Thank you so much for all the love and all the support. Go check it out. Patreon.com the Basemanyard Back to you. My every bone in my body cracked.

[Joe Santagado]

I heard the crack.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, it was vault soda. I looked it up when you were reading the ads. Do you remember that one? It had big V on it and it was like, vault.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, open the vault.

[Antonio Prisco]

I have something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, chocolate milk, is it? Yeah, A Yoo Hoo. That. You pull it out of your bag. You were the kid. You. I think I've said this before. You probably had the coolest school lunches as a kid because your family is loaded and you have giant balls.

[Antonio Prisco]

Not back.

[Joe Santagado]

Not.

[Antonio Prisco]

Not. Not. When I was little, I didn't have good lunches. I traded up for good lunches. I was a good little, like, trader.

[Frank Alvarez]

Were you that kid that was just like, I'm gonna trade this paperclip for this high fee?

[Antonio Prisco]

Paperclips weren't high commodity. But, yeah, something like that. Either way, I have a question. Have you ever looked at a couple and went, are they siblings or are they dating?

[Joe Santagado]

Of course.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, I guess if you're asking if I'm looking at a couple and I know they're a couple, then I know that they're dating. So I've never done that.

[Joe Santagado]

I can't even follow the logic. What he just said.

[Antonio Prisco]

You invite him to parties. There's this Instagram page that posts pictures of couples.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, my God.

[Antonio Prisco]

Or siblings. And I want you to decipher if these pairings are siblings or dating.

[Joe Santagado]

Okay?

[Antonio Prisco]

For example, these two. Are these siblings or are they dating?

[Joe Santagado]

Why does that guy look so familiar?

[Frank Alvarez]

Also, why does he look like he's AI Created?

[Joe Santagado]

Wait, that guy looks mad familiar.

[Frank Alvarez]

He actually does look very.

[Joe Santagado]

That's Lance Stroll. Is it?

[Antonio Prisco]

Who's. Who's that?

[Joe Santagado]

An F1 driver.

[Antonio Prisco]

Really?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. There's a comment that says, lance, what are you doing here? I was like, what the hell? Am I going nuts? Who's. Well, hold on. Oh, my God. Yes. Lance Stroll, the driver. That's. I. I knew. I knew for. Sorry, hold on. That's Lance Stroll.

[Antonio Prisco]

Do you know.

[Joe Santagado]

And he drives for.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know who he drives for? Joey, you don't want me to do this. And do you know who he drives for?

[Antonio Prisco]

Murr.

[Frank Alvarez]

Come on. Burr.

[Antonio Prisco]

Murr.

[Frank Alvarez]

Murr.

[Antonio Prisco]

Murr.

[Frank Alvarez]

Nice try, idiot. Tell him we're gonna say that. Same time. I mean, come on. Classic. It's a car brand.

[Joe Santagado]

What color?

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, who sees color nowadays?

[Joe Santagado]

Well, okay,

[Frank Alvarez]

can we say it together just so I know that you know, I know my fandom is concrete.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm done.

[Frank Alvarez]

Three, two, one.

[Joe Santagado]

Burr.

[Frank Alvarez]

Nice try, Burr. Nice try.

[Joe Santagado]

I believe he's Canadian.

[Antonio Prisco]

That helps.

[Frank Alvarez]

That does. If he was from. I'm not going to do that.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, I don't even know what you're saying, but, like, I believe he's Canadian. So her wearing a giant's hat.

[Frank Alvarez]

Canadians can drive. That's a little joke. I don't know why I did that. There's nothing about Canadians about them not.

[Antonio Prisco]

I'll get it down.

[Joe Santagado]

So I'm thinking that these people are dating because she might be from New York, but I believe he's Canadian.

[Antonio Prisco]

What do you think, Frankie?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I mean, again, Joey's using context clues here, and I am very appreciative of it. The New York Giants hat. If he is Canadian, they don't have football up there and. But they are sitting mighty.

[Joe Santagado]

Like, if this is your sister. That's a crazy pose.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I'm going to say dating.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm saying dating, too. Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Whoa, dude.

[Antonio Prisco]

Siblings.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right. Okay. I love my siblings. I don't know if I love them.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, that's a little wild like that. That's too much for me.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's a lot.

[Antonio Prisco]

All right, what about these? These two siblings are dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

These two look familiar, too. Am I crazy?

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, that guy doesn't ring a bell.

[Antonio Prisco]

Siblings are dating.

[Joe Santagado]

He looks like a scarecrow to me.

[Frank Alvarez]

He looks like. He looks like a werewolf as he's about to transform. Look at his hands. Are his hands not as, like, bigger than his head?

[Joe Santagado]

I'm going to say these people are, I'm hoping, dating. But, you know, I was thrown off

[Frank Alvarez]

by the last one.

[Antonio Prisco]

Why are you hoping again, that.

[Joe Santagado]

That's like a weird pose. I would never sit with my sister like this. Yeah, that is a.

[Frank Alvarez]

Hands kind of on the side don't really look alike.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, they don't look alike at all.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, normally you could see people and you say like. Okay, I could see the relation there. Like, the features are significantly different.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, I'm gonna say that they're.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm gonna say dating.

[Joe Santagado]

Dating, Dating. Dating.

[Antonio Prisco]

Siblings.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's a. That's.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm noticing a pattern.

[Antonio Prisco]

Over two. Over two.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right.

[Joe Santagado]

Jesus Christ.

[Antonio Prisco]

All right, what about these two?

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know what they are dating or siblings wise, but they're fucking staring at me and I feel a hole being burnt in my forehead.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, this is kind of wild.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is like. What. When you look out and you. Like when you look out of your window and you Hear an owl. This is what you expect to see. Those eyes.

[Joe Santagado]

I will say. I'm gonna say they're siblings, but if they are dating, they shouldn't, because clearly they are related.

[Frank Alvarez]

Got it. I will tell you this. If they.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, they look.

[Frank Alvarez]

They look very similar. Like, look at the. Like, the lips. Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

Like, they have the same face shape.

[Frank Alvarez]

Their nose. Their nose is kind of similar in its build.

[Joe Santagado]

Listen, man, I think again, if they are dating, then I think they should both do, like, a 23andMe, and then they will find out that there's something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I'm going to say siblings here,

[Joe Santagado]

guys going to end up like Frank's family or something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, why is my family catching strays?

[Joe Santagado]

I mean, you're one uncle or whatever.

[Frank Alvarez]

There was one cousin that did marry another cousin, but he's distant enough that it has no blood bearing on me.

[Antonio Prisco]

These two are dating.

[Joe Santagado]

Wow. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, now I'm gonna go with

[Joe Santagado]

the opposite of what I think.

[Antonio Prisco]

The opposite of what you think?

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. That's crazy. Wow.

[Antonio Prisco]

All right, so let's go. Why not here? What do you think? Siblings are dating, but now you two are locking in.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, now that we've been wrong about every single one, this is, like,

[Joe Santagado]

a less uncomfortable pose if you're siblings, but still not great.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's. Have you ever heard of this thing that people do where it's, like the. The like, lean challenge in a picture or something like that?

[Joe Santagado]

What is that?

[Frank Alvarez]

Where it's like, they draw a line with the person's, like, posture, and it's like the person that's leaning cares for the person more or something like that. I don't. Dark magic, Obviously I don't know it well enough to be able to describe

[Antonio Prisco]

it, but it actually looks like they might have multiple pictures. You want to go to the next one? Do they? It might not have the answer. Okay. This help hurt.

[Frank Alvarez]

Dad does look a little dating, though. Like, it looks a little like we're dating. You know, hey, we're dating. Like, hey, it's us. You know, us. We're dating.

[Joe Santagado]

Okay. Is there another one or.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, There might be one more. I don't. There we go.

[Joe Santagado]

Nope,

[Frank Alvarez]

I was right.

[Antonio Prisco]

There was a sneaky four down here. But I don't know what that last one's for. Oh, they voted.

[Frank Alvarez]

Got it. Interesting.

[Joe Santagado]

All right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Have you ever had, like, a.

[Joe Santagado]

Like a.

[Frank Alvarez]

A weird, like, oh, no, that's my sister moment or something like that?

[Joe Santagado]

No.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think I've told you the story where my sister and I were doing Karaoke. And we were singing paradise by the Dashboard Light. And then midway through the song, had the realization of what the song's about and stopped and just walked off the stage. Yeah, we. It was like, okay, this is.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, we're like, ugh.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Time to. Time to go.

[Antonio Prisco]

All right, what about here? Siblings are dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, that kind of strikes me as siblings.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm gonna say siblings because.

[Antonio Prisco]

Wait, there's no way to. What the.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's no way to tell.

[Antonio Prisco]

Let's keep that one.

[Joe Santagado]

Why?

[Antonio Prisco]

There's no, like, answer.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, okay.

[Antonio Prisco]

For some reason, I was gonna say

[Joe Santagado]

he kind of looked like Kid Rock.

[Antonio Prisco]

Oh, all right, let's go here. Siblings are dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, that's a tough one.

[Joe Santagado]

Is that a mullet?

[Antonio Prisco]

It's a little mullet.

[Joe Santagado]

Who.

[Frank Alvarez]

That makes me lean one way a little more. That makes me think that there's a possible Venn diagram situation going here. You said freckled. Like, it's a.

[Joe Santagado]

They're very freckled.

[Frank Alvarez]

They're freckled.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, they are. I'm gonna say dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm gonna say siblings because they do look very similar. I'm looking at, like teeth structure. I'm looking at all, like, even the smile, there's similarities. The bone, the cheeks, they look similar.

[Joe Santagado]

They're under an umbrella. So that makes me feel like they're dating. Dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

What, an under the umbrella every time. How would that even. How did you even get to that?

[Joe Santagado]

I don't know, man.

[Antonio Prisco]

What about.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, man, I'm finding I'm awful at this.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah. Not very good at.

[Joe Santagado]

Some people just take photos together that are like, nuts.

[Antonio Prisco]

What about here? Siblings are dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well,

[Joe Santagado]

That's.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's really tough. I kind of want to say they're.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm going to say they're siblings again.

[Frank Alvarez]

They do look similar. Yeah. Their eyes, I think, because I want to say dating, I'm going to go siblings.

[Joe Santagado]

I want to say siblings. This is like my sister and siblings

[Antonio Prisco]

dating.

[Joe Santagado]

I.

[Frank Alvarez]

How. How am I this consistently bad?

[Joe Santagado]

How can we not get one?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I think I got one and you got one. We both single handedly got one. Have you ever seen like a couple in public and like be like, oh, they must be siblings and then they kiss or something like that? We recently spoke about, like, you will see like people on first dates and you'll like, imagine like what they're talking about and stuff.

[Joe Santagado]

These people are siblings.

[Antonio Prisco]

Siblings.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. I can just tell the eyes. The eye, like the structure of the forehead and the eyes.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do nothing. I. I win nothing by being Contrarian here. So I will.

[Joe Santagado]

I will agree with Joey.

[Antonio Prisco]

Siblings.

[Joe Santagado]

Siblings.

[Antonio Prisco]

Siblings.

[Frank Alvarez]

Great job.

[Joe Santagado]

Got one really good job.

[Frank Alvarez]

That never happened to me.

[Joe Santagado]

But what did happen to me was the opposite. So one time I was at a wedding, and there was this girl there, and I was with MP and we were, like, dancing at this wedding, and we. We. We know this girl. You know who she is, too? And first and last. Nope. And initials. If I gave you her initials, you wouldn't know who it was. But we were noticing. We thought that she was, like, fighting with her boyfriend or husband or something, and we were like, damn. Like, they're, like, clearly, like, unhappy people or, like, whatever's going on. And then we saw them in the airport, and it was like, their whole family is like, oh, this is her brother. So, like, they didn't look that alike. But I thought they were dating for some reason because they were, like, fighting or something, and I was like. I thought they were, like, I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Interesting. There was, like. There was like, a.

[Joe Santagado]

Those people are siblings.

[Frank Alvarez]

Right in the middle.

[Joe Santagado]

Those white bastards here. Nope, nope. Dead center here. Yep. Those white bastards. Those are siblings. Siblings, Absolutely.

[Antonio Prisco]

Frankie.

[Joe Santagado]

They have to be this.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's.

[Joe Santagado]

The bone structure is so niche and unique. They have to be siblings.

[Frank Alvarez]

Man, that's so tough. I don't know. The eyes. The eyes are so different, though.

[Joe Santagado]

But the jaws.

[Frank Alvarez]

The eyes are so different.

[Joe Santagado]

There's no way. Siblings.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm gonna go dating.

[Antonio Prisco]

Dating.

[Frank Alvarez]

Get out of here. How did you find your job match? That's unbelievable. There was a growing up. I'm not gonna. Not even growing up. It was later into, like, my, like, teenage years. There was, like, a family that was, like, tangentially around, like, the friend group and stuff like that. And I'm not obviously not gonna say who they are, but, like, the joke was that the brother and sister were, like, really close.

[Joe Santagado]

Whoa.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like. Like.

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[Joe Santagado]

You know these people?

[Frank Alvarez]

Um, yes. You've met. Not. I wouldn't say know them. Like, if I told you their name, you'd be like, uh, like, if I. Not.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, it was around you, not me.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no. Like, they had come around, like, once or twice.

[Joe Santagado]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, did they? No, maybe they didn't. But, like, the. The point of it was just like, they were very like, ew, I'm leaving the room. I'm coming with you.

[Joe Santagado]

You know, like a brother and sister.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. And like, just people just being like, okay.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, it was weird, but okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

What?

[Antonio Prisco]

No, no. Is it like, friends were making fun or was it like, family was like,

[Frank Alvarez]

you know, I don't know who was making fun on their end. I can only tell you that the people that I heard from, everyone was just, like, interesting.

[Antonio Prisco]

There was once I saw, like, oh, they're siblings. I was like, oh.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, there. There's definitely, like, ugh. Yeah, there's like, weird lines like that. That. Yeah, you can't.

[Joe Santagado]

But also, like, if I was, like, at a thing, right. And I saw, like, if I was at your house and your sister was there and she was sitting on your lap on a love seat and had her arm around you, I'd be like, what do you do?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I get that. I'd be like, oh, like, I get

[Joe Santagado]

that for a second. But, like, come on.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think. Listen, I'm not gonna sit there and say that you're wrong completely. I think that there is, like, a weird. Like, there. There is an age, and I don't know what it is where like, that becomes from. Like, it's just like, siblings to, like, weird.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, into it. Seemingly all the people we're seeing here are into their adulthood.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's when it gets a little weird. But, like, if it's like, you know, 12 and your older sibling is, like, 14, like, you could. You could kind of chalk it up a little more.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, I also can see how an older sibling that has a very sibling would be more affectionate.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, if.

[Joe Santagado]

If the older sibling was, like, 18

[Frank Alvarez]

and their younger, like, siblings, like, five

[Joe Santagado]

or, like 10 or something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, like, that's like.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, that's. That's.

[Joe Santagado]

You know what I mean? Like, that's. That's different, but, like, close in age. Like, you guys are two years apart and you're both, like, in your mid-20s and sitting on each other's laps is a little wild to me.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I agree.

[Joe Santagado]

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[Antonio Prisco]

I like them.

[Frank Alvarez]

They're good. I forgot to pee. Pee again.

[Joe Santagado]

Again?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, like I Was supposed to go pee but I forgot again.

[Joe Santagado]

Don't say pee.

[Frank Alvarez]

Pee. Why not?

[Joe Santagado]

34 Whiz. Is that not 1998?

[Frank Alvarez]

Is that better? I'm gonna go whiz.

[Joe Santagado]

I gotta go. I hate when people say, I gotta go take a leak. I'm like, ew.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, take a leak. I. I'm fine with. I hate the one where they like tell me about their penis. Where they go like, I'm gonna go drain the main vein.

[Joe Santagado]

It's like, definitely not your main vein.

[Frank Alvarez]

Definitely not.

[Joe Santagado]

Jugular. Are you telling me you're gonna go slit your throat back there?

[Frank Alvarez]

Jugular is an artery. Well, you know that.

[Joe Santagado]

It's a vein though.

[Frank Alvarez]

Name one other artery.

[Joe Santagado]

Your Cartered. Whatever that is. All right, good. There you go.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, you got it. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Carotid.

[Joe Santagado]

Carotid.

[Frank Alvarez]

And the femoral. Right. I know that one because a Dexter.

[Joe Santagado]

And it's in the leg. The femoral.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

Next to your femur.

[Frank Alvarez]

There you go.

[Joe Santagado]

I honestly just did that with context clues. It's just something I like to do.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm surprised you knew the femur was a bone.

[Joe Santagado]

You don't respect me.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do respect you.

[Joe Santagado]

You don't respect me as a human.

[Frank Alvarez]

First of all. Absolutely. I don't think. First of all.

[Joe Santagado]

206. 206.

[Frank Alvarez]

I talk about how smart you are all the time. I think that you are incredibly smart.

[Antonio Prisco]

Okay.

[Joe Santagado]

You think I don't know what a femur is? It's the most famous bone. No, who's the most famous bone?

[Frank Alvarez]

Humorous. It's kind of funny.

[Antonio Prisco]

I got it.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. Write that down. That's got to be like a hundred dollar fine or something.

[Frank Alvarez]

Why am I getting fined?

[Antonio Prisco]

I vote for the tailbone.

[Frank Alvarez]

Tailbone is not.

[Joe Santagado]

Tailbone's not the most famous bone.

[Frank Alvarez]

The worst. Name one. Is the coccyx. I'll tell you that.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Definitely not by your cock. And there's only one of them.

[Joe Santagado]

Mark them down again. Yeah, I got. What?

[Frank Alvarez]

Come on. Why am I getting marked there? That's fucked up.

[Joe Santagado]

What is the most famous bone? Collar.

[Frank Alvarez]

Collar's a good bone.

[Antonio Prisco]

Skull.

[Frank Alvarez]

Skull. Is the skull a bone or a collection of bones?

[Joe Santagado]

It's a skull. You know, it's a skull.

[Frank Alvarez]

But is. But isn't. Aren't there Bones are teeth. Bones. No, those are enamel.

[Joe Santagado]

What is that?

[Frank Alvarez]

It's teeth. I think it's like what our nails are also made out of. Or is that. You know what?

[Joe Santagado]

Watch.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't like this. You know what? I don't really know.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Antonio Prisco]

I can't accept the answer of skull, because it's 22 separate bones.

[Frank Alvarez]

There we go. See, I told you.

[Joe Santagado]

Nose.

[Frank Alvarez]

Nose bone. There is no nose bone. Your nose is cartilage.

[Antonio Prisco]

There's no bone.

[Frank Alvarez]

Are you serious?

[Joe Santagado]

So hold on.

[Antonio Prisco]

That's bad.

[Frank Alvarez]

So hold on. See, now you think. I think you're an idiot because I'm surprised that, you know the femur is a bone, but there you are spewing out, you got a nose bone.

[Joe Santagado]

There's no bone whatsoever.

[Antonio Prisco]

So what do people break still their nose?

[Frank Alvarez]

They break the cartilage.

[Antonio Prisco]

You ever see a skull? It has. It's not. There's nothing there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, you know, we can break. Wait a sec. What do we. Now hold on.

[Joe Santagado]

You better hope there ain't a bone.

[Frank Alvarez]

You better hope, too. Giggles in trouble.

[Joe Santagado]

Is there a nose in your bone?

[Frank Alvarez]

But, yeah, that's backwards.

[Joe Santagado]

Is there a bone in your nose? No, no, no, don't.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's cartilage. It's cartilage.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is the hardest cartilage on the planet.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's cartilage. Cartilage.

[Frank Alvarez]

Damn. So I was right. See, I knew it. You're an idiot.

[Joe Santagado]

There are bones in your nose.

[Antonio Prisco]

Don't. Don't read that part.

[Joe Santagado]

They only.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's the answer.

[Joe Santagado]

They only make up the top part. Specifically the upper third. Yeah, the bridge, bro. This is hard bone.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, but it's not a nose bone.

[Frank Alvarez]

He's kind of. All right, now. I'm back on.

[Joe Santagado]

He's jutting out. This is your nose here, buddy.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm back on. Joey's smart. Nance an idiot.

[Joe Santagado]

The two lower thirds are made of cartilage, which is why the tip of your nose is flexible. Yeah, like this part. I didn't think this was a bone, obviously, but this is a bone. Yeah. And.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, see? I'm so sorry. Do you see what. Do you see what he made me do?

[Antonio Prisco]

That was.

[Frank Alvarez]

He gave me incorrect information to gas me up here. I am a gas. Well, I think that it was a

[Antonio Prisco]

trap just to see if Frankie would jump ship. And he jumped ship right away.

[Frank Alvarez]

I did jump ship, but now I'm back swimming on your ship. All right. Swimming over. Back to your ship.

[Joe Santagado]

Swimming.

[Frank Alvarez]

I left my ship of calling you an idiot, and now I believe that you're smart again.

[Antonio Prisco]

The problem is that bone isn't considered your nose.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, but it makes up your.

[Joe Santagado]

I mean, this is what I'm referring to.

[Frank Alvarez]

It makes up the structure of your nose.

[Joe Santagado]

Breaks their nose. I'm assuming they're talking about the bone. And you can't break cartilage.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, you can.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I think that's the whole point of it being cartilage is that it won't break.

[Joe Santagado]

You can't, like, break this. You break the, like, the bone.

[Antonio Prisco]

I got it.

[Frank Alvarez]

See, I'm sorry. I'm here to apologize, admit my wrongdoing.

[Joe Santagado]

That's why you're here.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Not because I get paid. I want to. I will bow to you if you need me to.

[Joe Santagado]

Ew. Oh, actually, no, that's.

[Antonio Prisco]

Let him bow. Make a bow.

[Joe Santagado]

I would like to. I think we should. We should take that from the Japanese. We should bow. I'd be cool, like, saying hello.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, I think we've taken a lot from the Japanese over the last century. I think we should, you know.

[Joe Santagado]

Are you referring to the technology or the lives?

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm referring to a. An all encompassing.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

View of it. I do like bowing, and I'll do you one better. I want to, like, if I ever go to Japan, I want to be told what to do. Like, I want. So, like, I saw recently that there's a minor league baseball team where Hideki Matsui was there, and I was like, oh, this would be so cool if I went and got to meet him. But would I shake his hand or would I bow? Because I wouldn't want to be disrespectful. You know, I want to make sure I'm being responsible and, you know, respectful. But I want someone to say, like, hey, by the way, you're meeting Hideki Matsui. You can. You can bow or you can shake his hand. I want to be.

[Joe Santagado]

I just want to be told his nickname was. What?

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I'm not.

[Joe Santagado]

Was Godzilla. Right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. I, I. Looking back, it was 2003 when he made his nickname was Godzilla.

[Joe Santagado]

I can imagine you being a little

[Frank Alvarez]

drunk off, like, go. I know, I know. Godzilla. Hindsight. Hindsight it was. Why give him that nickname? You know, like that. That was bad.

[Joe Santagado]

Shout out to Hideki manu, World Series MVP. Right?

[Frank Alvarez]

In 2009. Yeah. If you look at those numbers. Boy, oh, boy, did he put on a clinic.

[Joe Santagado]

Slapping the thing.

[Frank Alvarez]

He put on a clinic.

[Joe Santagado]

How did we get here? What are we talking about?

[Antonio Prisco]

I thought the nose didn't. I can't believe.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh.

[Frank Alvarez]

What I was saying. I am sorry.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, we're back. Frank.

[Antonio Prisco]

Bow.

[Joe Santagado]

I don't really know how to accept.

[Frank Alvarez]

I am. Can I.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm sorry.

[Joe Santagado]

Okay. It's okay. What more do you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Let me finish. Oh, so you know what I'm sorry for? What's so funny?

[Joe Santagado]

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, no. Wait.

[Joe Santagado]

What?

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm gonna apologize. No, no, no. I'm gonna apologize. You stop. No, I'm not stopping, Frank.

[Joe Santagado]

You have your hands under the desk.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, no, no. I'm sorry. I was just playing with the loop of my. What do you think I was going to do?

[Joe Santagado]

Loading up something or. The last time you did this, you had a fake wiener, so I don't know. I did.

[Frank Alvarez]

I did. I did. I'm not doing either of those things. I was just playing with the loop of my drawstring. I am sorry. Yeah. I incorrectly assumed the status of surprised thinking that you knew what a femur was, and that was diminishing your intellect. I will never question you again. Please don't let this be the end of us.

[Joe Santagado]

I can't even begin to explain how uncomfortable that is to sit through.

[Antonio Prisco]

I'm not apologizing for the nose thing. I don't think it's the nose.

[Joe Santagado]

I know that. You don't.

[Frank Alvarez]

You're only doing that to be contrarian. Has anyone ever told you you're contrarian?

[Antonio Prisco]

King Conch over there.

[Frank Alvarez]

King Conch? Yeah. Whatever I got. Fine. Triple it and fucking swallow it.

[Joe Santagado]

Triple it and fucking swallow it.

[Frank Alvarez]

That was bad.

[Joe Santagado]

King Conch.

[Antonio Prisco]

All right, I'll write it. Sorry.

[Frank Alvarez]

You.

[Joe Santagado]

I feel like you don't even write stuff over there.

[Antonio Prisco]

There's a bunch of stuff. Should I start posting what I write?

[Joe Santagado]

No. Yeah, that would be funny.

[Antonio Prisco]

I'll start posting your hat, by the way.

[Joe Santagado]

You've worn it a bunch of times. What does it mean?

[Antonio Prisco]

Vroom.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's the sound of car. Bates.

[Antonio Prisco]

This is this.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm back to thinking you're a fucking idiot.

[Joe Santagado]

I know that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm so sorry.

[Antonio Prisco]

This is a. This is from the Cartathon.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, okay. It's from Cargo. Vroom.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, it's coming up. July,

[Joe Santagado]

you plug another thing. Your head off. Come over there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Can I ask you a serious question, and this is like a legit question.

[Joe Santagado]

Wait, wait. Be careful.

[Frank Alvarez]

Don't set me up.

[Joe Santagado]

Buckle in.

[Antonio Prisco]

Don't. Don't set me up here, because.

[Joe Santagado]

Do you.

[Frank Alvarez]

Do you, like. Please. Do you, like, specifically wear picky boy stuff to come here and record?

[Antonio Prisco]

No, it's just all you. I have.

[Joe Santagado]

That's all I got. That's all I got is literally all I have. Just all I got.

[Antonio Prisco]

That's all I have.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right. I was wondering just a little.

[Antonio Prisco]

I threw out more clothes to make space for more.

[Frank Alvarez]

More picky boy stuff.

[Antonio Prisco]

I did.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm with you. I love The Santa Gatta Studios merch and, like, the show merch and all the stuff that we did. I'm dead serious. I'm not, like, trying to be like a. Go buy it at Shop Santa.

[Joe Santagado]

Gotta Studios.

[Frank Alvarez]

I like. We make legitimately good quality shirts and stuff. Like, those tour shirts were unbelievable. They were. They were so good. Oh, like, how they feel. I'm tactile, you know that.

[Joe Santagado]

Do you just pull stuff out and you touch it?

[Frank Alvarez]

If I'm gonna buy a shirt, I need to feel it. Make sure I like it first.

[Joe Santagado]

Are you a fidgety guy? Did you get really into fidget spinners when they came out?

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I, I, I, I, I don't know if I had one or if someone I knew had one and I played with it, but I, I'm sure I fidget.

[Joe Santagado]

I love a fidget spinner.

[Frank Alvarez]

Fidget spinners. Like, I like the ones that were like. It was like a cube and it had, like, a button or a.

[Joe Santagado]

My sister got me one of those.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. That I. That I like.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. Because it's got buttons, then the other one's like a joystick.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yes.

[Joe Santagado]

And then there's one's like a switch.

[Antonio Prisco]

You get.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yes, that one's.

[Antonio Prisco]

And I'm like.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, I like that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I do. Like, I pick at my fingers, which, you know, is an issue that I have.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. See defense there.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. I mean. Hey, man.

[Antonio Prisco]

Sorry.

[Joe Santagado]

That was good.

[Antonio Prisco]

I didn't expect. Because of the. Because of the band aid to stop

[Joe Santagado]

yourself from chewing at the. You didn't notice that he wears bandit.

[Frank Alvarez]

Are you crying?

[Antonio Prisco]

Yeah, a little bit.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, you laugh at alcoholics, too, you freak.

[Joe Santagado]

He's, He's.

[Frank Alvarez]

You heartless. What are you talking about?

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, that. You're an addict for this.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm not an addict, but it's just, it's how I cope,

[Joe Santagado]

you know why he has to cope? Tell him. I don't know.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, they could get infected, and I don't want that to happen.

[Joe Santagado]

Right.

[Antonio Prisco]

Are there any teeth marks in the band aid because you forget sometimes?

[Frank Alvarez]

No,

[Joe Santagado]

that was a good question.

[Frank Alvarez]

I gotta say. I gotta say, me, I don't like what he's doing, and you're kind of fucking gently patting him on the back and pushing him in that fucking direction

[Joe Santagado]

the last 10 minutes. I feel like it's. This is not my show. You guys have been. And I'm Switzerland.

[Frank Alvarez]

You gotta bow again. He needs it.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, all right.

[Frank Alvarez]

Sorry. What? Not. You bow, too. Thank you so much. This is not. This is not my show. You heard him say that mine. And then he looked at us. I'm so sorry.

[Joe Santagado]

No, I'm saying that you guys are going back and forth with each other. First of all, that thing put you in a good mood. If that's not selling you on angry. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

Jesus Christ. You went from fucking. He. He's an aha's. To Giggles McGee over there.

[Joe Santagado]

Accurate acriot. Gosh.

[Antonio Prisco]

My bad.

[Joe Santagado]

Gosh.

[Frank Alvarez]

Gosh. Gosh.

[Joe Santagado]

What's.

[Frank Alvarez]

What are you laughing about now? You got a gig now what are you doing? What the hell is funny with you? I think you said that, bro. I don't even know why I'm laughing Now.

[Joe Santagado]

Now.

[Frank Alvarez]

This is no longer my show. How's that bow to me? That's not even what I meant by that. Bow to me. Oh, well, how am I gonna. The deeper the bow, the more respectful the respect.

[Antonio Prisco]

Oh, that was good bow.

[Frank Alvarez]

That was a good bow. Now he's breaking shit. This episode is getting off the rails. You're drunk. You're an idiot.

[Joe Santagado]

You don't know bones.

[Frank Alvarez]

You don't know bones.

[Joe Santagado]

I know bones.

[Frank Alvarez]

Can you name. How many bones can you name?

[Joe Santagado]

206.

[Frank Alvarez]

No.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, I can't name that.

[Frank Alvarez]

I asked you.

[Joe Santagado]

Collarbone. Femur. I almost said Lima, Peru.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, that is in Peru.

[Joe Santagado]

Nose. Skull.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, the skull's a collection. The skull's a collection of bones. All right.

[Antonio Prisco]

It's 22 bones, actually, so he named 22.

[Frank Alvarez]

If you just say skull, that's like if I say baseball. And I named all the players.

[Joe Santagado]

Mandible.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay, I don't think.

[Joe Santagado]

Finger.

[Frank Alvarez]

Those are called the phalanges.

[Joe Santagado]

Elbow. Forearm.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is elbow a bone?

[Joe Santagado]

No, probably not. They probably have, like, crazy Jurassic names, and I don't know them. Do you know bones?

[Frank Alvarez]

I know some humerus. Tibia. Fibia. Femur.

[Joe Santagado]

Tibia. Tibia is a good one.

[Frank Alvarez]

Patella.

[Joe Santagado]

That's a tendon. No, patella tendon.

[Frank Alvarez]

This isn't the patella. Your kneecap.

[Antonio Prisco]

It is your kneecap.

[Frank Alvarez]

Thank you.

[Joe Santagado]

What is the patella tendon, then?

[Frank Alvarez]

I think it's the patellan.

[Antonio Prisco]

Is that what attaches to the kneecap kind of thing?

[Joe Santagado]

I thought the patella was the patella tendon.

[Antonio Prisco]

It says patella.

[Frank Alvarez]

Maybe it's.

[Joe Santagado]

It's Cruz broke his.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, no. Years ago. I don't care about Victor Cruz.

[Joe Santagado]

That's the reason why I know it.

[Frank Alvarez]

You think I care about that?

[Joe Santagado]

Should.

[Frank Alvarez]

Phalanges. Coccyx. Hip.

[Joe Santagado]

Ribs.

[Frank Alvarez]

Rib bone.

[Joe Santagado]

Spine. Dude, spine.

[Frank Alvarez]

Isn't the spine. Like, there's the thoracic spine, there's the lumbar. Spine. There's, like, different parts of it. Yo. Spine. The spine is crazy, dude.

[Joe Santagado]

There's fluid in it, bro.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's fluid. There's little, like, little discs of. In between the bones.

[Joe Santagado]

What is that?

[Frank Alvarez]

And then, like, it has, like, it. It looks like a spine, if that makes sense.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah, like the fact that there's oil in it. Not oil, like liquid. And you gotta, like, drink. Like, it's, like, mad important, bro.

[Frank Alvarez]

You take some of that liquid and people will, like, lose feeling in their legs and. Like that. Yeah.

[Joe Santagado]

What is that? It's like magic liquid.

[Frank Alvarez]

I don't know what kind of liquid it is, but. Spinal fluid, yo. We're idiots.

[Joe Santagado]

Ocular. What's this called? Oh, my God. UFC fighters break it all the time.

[Frank Alvarez]

Ocular.

[Joe Santagado]

What is this called? Your eye bone?

[Frank Alvarez]

Optical lens? No. Why is that funny?

[Antonio Prisco]

Orbital.

[Joe Santagado]

Orbital.

[Frank Alvarez]

Orbital bone or roll.

[Joe Santagado]

We don't know any bones, dude, but

[Frank Alvarez]

we don't need cheekbones. Yeah, who the are we? We're not doctors, believe it or not.

[Joe Santagado]

Also, if a doctor. What is a doctor gonna do with knowing a bone? If I broke my bone, I wouldn't be like, name the bone. I'd be like, fix the bone.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, I hope they would be able to tell you which bone it was so then they can fix that bone.

[Joe Santagado]

But forget about knowing the but if I break my arm, I don't even be like, oh, you know what the scientific name for this is? I'd be like, doctors, fix my fucking arm.

[Frank Alvarez]

Well, it's good that they know it, but you don't need to. They don't need to show off like the waiters that sit there and remember, you know, your fucking order.

[Joe Santagado]

Full circle.

[Frank Alvarez]

Is that this episode? I don't even know.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, that was not.

[Frank Alvarez]

They all seem to fucking bend together. Meshing, melt together. Oh, completely random, Aunt. It's not your show anymore. You see the trailer for the. Oh, you're bowing to me again.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, that was a him.

[Frank Alvarez]

How far down can you get?

[Antonio Prisco]

Don't.

[Frank Alvarez]

What trailer for Evil Dead. Burn.

[Joe Santagado]

Wait, before you answer that, you ever try to suck your own winner way

[Frank Alvarez]

before you answer that?

[Antonio Prisco]

Probably.

[Frank Alvarez]

Are you happy? Probably.

[Antonio Prisco]

Which one? Which one? To me. Happy? No, same.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm asking you a question.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm asking you a question.

[Joe Santagado]

I said, have you ever sucked your own wiener? And you said, probably.

[Antonio Prisco]

No, no, no. Tempted, you said. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Well, how? Like, I didn't get close. That was probably the follow up. I kind of jumped that gun.

[Joe Santagado]

No, I wasn't even thinking that. But I mean, that's a fair question. Have you? I don't think so.

[Antonio Prisco]

You haven't tried?

[Joe Santagado]

I think so.

[Antonio Prisco]

Frankie looks like a trier.

[Frank Alvarez]

No, I have not tried because I'm flexible enough to believe that if I did try, I would do it.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, you think you could get that thing?

[Frank Alvarez]

I.

[Joe Santagado]

Not now.

[Frank Alvarez]

Maybe like 10 years.

[Joe Santagado]

In your prime.

[Frank Alvarez]

In prime flexibility. Age.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And I wouldn't want, like. I wouldn't be able. Like, how do you live with that?

[Joe Santagado]

It's Pandora's box.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know what I mean? Once you open it, it's what you pop. You can't. Cursed world. Once you pop, you can't stop. Is it actually possible I can guarant, bro. There are people bending the other way. I mean, you could fit.

[Antonio Prisco]

You could.

[Joe Santagado]

You know, like, if you see, like, gymnasts, they can, like, fold in half.

[Antonio Prisco]

That's true.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, I don't know, because, like, if you bend someone at the hip, like, just like, the angle of where. If this is.

[Antonio Prisco]

I'm not gonna use.

[Joe Santagado]

Can't bend that.

[Frank Alvarez]

All right. Say this is a person.

[Antonio Prisco]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Okay. And say this. Not. Not drawn to scale, obviously. And this is their wiener. This is their mouth.

[Antonio Prisco]

Okay.

[Frank Alvarez]

Like, when you bend.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. It's, like, not lining up.

[Frank Alvarez]

It's not lining up. So, like, you'd have to, like, bent and, like, curl.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

To, like, there was have to be

[Joe Santagado]

a very, very flexible and very thin person.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah, I imagine.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

You know, which.

[Joe Santagado]

No, I wasn't saying. Yeah. Saying me.

[Frank Alvarez]

He was. You saw that, right? I was saying, like. I saw that. No. Oh, no. Now you're on his side.

[Antonio Prisco]

I'm always on his head.

[Frank Alvarez]

You have to be legally.

[Antonio Prisco]

I signed something a while ago.

[Frank Alvarez]

Employment wise. You have to be on his head.

[Joe Santagado]

You have to be legally in the court. The court says you do.

[Antonio Prisco]

But no. No avail.

[Frank Alvarez]

No avail.

[Antonio Prisco]

No avail.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, maybe if you try real hard,

[Frank Alvarez]

get someone on OPL who's like, I do this. I do this myself. I found out and I did it forever.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm sure that maybe will pop up one day.

[Antonio Prisco]

Yo.

[Frank Alvarez]

That. That. Could you imagine what a.

[Joe Santagado]

What a, like, conundrum.

[Frank Alvarez]

Yeah. Like. And this is a. This is a serious question here. Yeah. Would you consider that a homosexual encounter?

[Antonio Prisco]

It's masturbation. Maybe.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. I don't. I don't think so.

[Antonio Prisco]

If you.

[Frank Alvarez]

That's masturbation plus. That's a premium account.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah. That is. To be fair, I don't know if

[Antonio Prisco]

I'd pay for it.

[Joe Santagado]

There's no ads. There is.

[Frank Alvarez]

There's no Ads.

[Antonio Prisco]

So what if you had a clone

[Frank Alvarez]

that's like Mickey 17? I didn't see the movie, but I know that was in the trailer. He was. Robert Pattinson was fucking himself.

[Joe Santagado]

Well, I fell asleep in that movie. Not because it was bad, but because I was. I was. I was a little tired.

[Frank Alvarez]

Oh, wait, you actually watched it?

[Joe Santagado]

It was on.

[Frank Alvarez]

You didn't get to the part where he had sex with himself?

[Joe Santagado]

I would have remembered that.

[Frank Alvarez]

Interesting.

[Joe Santagado]

I didn't get the whole. I think I got, like, 10 minutes in.

[Frank Alvarez]

I mean, clearly you missed the whole.

[Joe Santagado]

Mark that down. I feel like we're getting off the rails here, and maybe we should just. Oh, you know.

[Antonio Prisco]

Oh, okay. Oh, hello.

[Joe Santagado]

How do you end a podcast after talking about sucking your own wiener? Yield conversation.

[Frank Alvarez]

I think you transition into something that's a little more palatable.

[Joe Santagado]

Let's talk football. Football, Football.

[Frank Alvarez]

Are you ready for some football?

[Joe Santagado]

We're not even close to football.

[Frank Alvarez]

I know, I know. But they're announcing the schedules soon, if they haven't already by the time this comes out. I'm excited. I'm trying to clean it up for the end of the episode. Joey, forgive me here.

[Joe Santagado]

We went from talking about bones to sucking our own wieners. That was completely my fault, by the way. I want to take full blame.

[Frank Alvarez]

You should. And you know what? Oh, oh, oh, that's a good one.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm going to double.

[Frank Alvarez]

I'm gonna.

[Joe Santagado]

I'm gonna bow to the audience as well, because that one's on me. But we're gonna end that there before this gets any. And then also

[Frank Alvarez]

you. Yeah, that fucking phone gets me every time. Every. That is one of the best additions to the show. Outside of me. That has ever been made.

[Joe Santagado]

Yes. Outside of me. I got it.

[Frank Alvarez]

What is that?

[Joe Santagado]

Would you write down Boo.

[Frank Alvarez]

He just does nothing. I'm letting you know. I'm letting you know you and I are going to have a talk solo.

[Joe Santagado]

Yeah.

[Frank Alvarez]

And then you'll disseminate the information to him.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, what's that word?

[Antonio Prisco]

I like it.

[Frank Alvarez]

Disseminate. Trickle it down to him.

[Joe Santagado]

Oh, seminate's crazy. That sounds like I'm doing like.

[Frank Alvarez]

You're doing like you're seminating yourself.

[Joe Santagado]

Sounds like we're right back into the conversation now. Yeah, again, my fault. Frank, where can they find you?

[Frank Alvarez]

He looked up to make sure. Disseminate. Actually remember what it is. And it is so he doesn't want to say it because I'm right.

[Antonio Prisco]

You two. He's right.

[Frank Alvarez]

The Frank Alvarez all over social media. Go check it out. Check out patreon patreon.com the basement yard and the basement yard at all forms of social media and Aunt Prisco on

[Joe Santagado]

Instagram and you can go follow me at Joe Santagado. Go follow the show at basemyard on Tick tock and Instagram. That is all. See you guys next time. Beautiful.