Full Show PT 1: Friday, December 5

Summary

The Bert Show – Full Show PT 1: Friday, December 5, 2025

Podcast: The Bert Show
Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Episode Date: December 5, 2025

---

Episode Overview

This episode brings the signature, unfiltered humor and authenticity of The Bert Show as the crew wraps up a "little black book" relationship experiment that had captured listeners all week. Show regulars (Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and others) revisit an outrageous saga involving a girlfriend, her boyfriend, and several of his ex-girlfriends—most notably a particularly persistent and opinionated ex named Stacy. After untangling this relational love triangle, the hosts veer into a lively debate on bar etiquette: is a woman obligated to talk to a guy who buys her a drink? The episode is chock-full of memorable lines, unscripted drama, and classic Bert Show banter.

---

Key Segments & Discussions

1. Little Black Book Finale: Jessica, Kevin, and the Exes

Timestamps: 01:57–16:31

Background

• Jessica, wanting to know her boyfriend Kevin better, spent the week talking to one of his ex-girlfriends each day.
• “Psycho Stacy,” an ex from three years prior, became a recurring (and uninvited) presence, continuing to contact Jessica and the show even after her initial scheduled appearance.

Email Feedback & Recap

• Jen reads an email (02:05):
  “You guys took America's most boring couple and turned it into a week long succession of bits. Congratulations, you guys are really talented. Thank God for Psycho Stacy.”
  — Listener Email

Key Moments & Quotes

• Jessica’s Recap (03:37–04:22):

  • Jessica clarifies that Stacy exaggerated the length of her call with Kevin.
  • “He was basically just trying to politely get off the phone with her.” — Jessica [04:12]

• Kevin’s Feelings (04:25–06:54):

  • Kevin reveals it felt “kind of creepy” to hear his personal life on the radio, emphasizing his preference for privacy.
  • “It was just weird for me to hear my own, you know, personal life just on the radio… It’s just kind of like Twilight Zoning or something.” — Kevin [06:23]
  • He objects to an ex (Annie) bringing up his mother's feelings, calling it “lame.”

• Relationship Dynamics & Sex Talk (08:15–09:56):

  • Discussion arises on the perceived lack of excitement in Jessica and Kevin’s relationship.
  • Jessica broaches the topic of Kevin’s “Playboy collection,” likening it to “practicing your golf swing the wrong way” [09:30].

• Stacy Crashes the Party (10:13–16:29):

  • Stacy calls in to contradict Kevin about the phone call length:
    “It was not a 10 minute conversation on Thursday. It was a 30 minute conversation. I don’t know why Kevin’s saying it was only 10.” — Stacy [10:29]
  • The exchange devolves into accusations, with Kevin calling Stacy “some sort of a weird psycho girl who at 19, was frigged up in the head and I made a big mistake…” [13:25]
  • Stacy defends her ongoing relationship with Kevin’s mother:
    “Just because you break up with someone doesn’t mean you break up with their family. Okay?” — Stacy [14:22]
  • Stacy gets emotional at the end, feeling she’s been treated unfairly and “very meanly.” She insists she was just trying to help, saying,
    “I think it's really unfair, and I think that they've been very mean, and they should… If they didn't want the truth about what was going on, they never should have done this on the air.” — Stacy [16:14]

Takeaways

• The experiment leads to messy, real-time drama and raw emotion, highlighting the show's love of “bringing listeners into our world.”

---

2. Bar Etiquette Debate: Obligations After a Free Drink

Timestamps: 18:57–30:11

Scenario

• Bert observes a common bar scene: guy and woman lock eyes, he sends her a drink, but she accepts with no intention of speaking to him.

• Bert's Position (19:36–22:15):

  • “If a guy buys you a drink, you are at least obligated to engage us in conversation to find out if we're the real deal or not. Am I wrong?” — Bert [20:36]
  • Panel generally agrees; accepting the drink is “agreeing to conversation” [22:15–22:29].

• Caller Candice Disagrees (22:29–22:51):

  • “That's just an assumption. You're assuming that if I buy her this drink, she's going to at least talk to me. I don't have to say anything to you. I can say thanks for the drink and keep it moving.” — Candice [22:40]
  • Show finds this “so rude”—“I don't think you should accept it.” [22:44]

• Graceful Exits and Social Cues

  • There’s spirited debate on whether a woman can “cheers” from across the bar and walk away (“still rude”), and the importance of saving face for the guy with his friends.

• Comic Escalation (25:02–26:17):

  • Bert jokes:
    “If I buy you a drink that costs more than $9, you're obligated to French kiss me.” [25:40]
  • Panel spins this further — “If your drink costs $10 or more, I get to touch one boob.” [26:04]

• "Drink Hoe" vs. "Gold Diggin Hoe" (29:23–29:50)

  • Caller T.C.: “The title that y'all are talking about is a ‘drink hoe.’ That's exactly what it is. She's just there to get a drink, and that's it.” [29:23]
  • Panel differentiates: drink hoe = 1 drink, gold digging hoe = many drinks.
  • “That's so wrong… what's three minutes? I buy you a drink, I would like to find the woman that has gone the longest, the longest time period not buying herself a drink.” — Bert [29:50]

Takeaways

• The show highlights gendered expectations in social settings and the unwritten rules of dating etiquette, mixing genuine disagreement with over-the-top jokes and self-awareness.

---

Most Notable Quotes & Moments

• “You guys took America's most boring couple and turned it into a week long succession of bits. Thank God for Psycho Stacy.”
  — Listener Email, read by Jen [02:05]

• “It was just weird for me to hear my own, you know, personal life just on the radio. But it didn’t really bother me. It’s just kind of like Twilight Zoning or something.”
  — Kevin [06:23]

• “Just because you break up with someone doesn’t mean you break up with their family. Okay?”
  — Stacy [14:22]

• “If a guy buys you a drink, you are at least obligated to engage us in conversation to find out if we're the real deal or not. Am I wrong?”
  — Bert [20:36]

• “That's just an assumption. I can say thanks for the drink and keep it moving.”
  — Candice, caller [22:40]

• “If I buy you a drink that costs more than $9, you're obligated to French kiss me.”
  — Bert [25:40] (jokingly)

---

Structure & Tone

• Tone: Playful, direct, brash, and self-deprecating, with room for genuine emotion and candid sharing.
• Flow: Discussions move briskly between outrageous humor, listener participation, and authentic arguments, capturing classic morning radio energy.
• Language: Relatable everyday speak, sprinkled with tongue-in-cheek exchanges and occasional pointed jabs.

---

Overall:
This episode distills everything the Bert Show is known for: bold relationship experiments, candid commentary, and a lively (sometimes controversial) exploration of dating culture. Through the real-life drama of Jessica, Kevin, and Stacy, and a spirited debate about bar etiquette, listeners are treated to a mix of laughs, awkwardness, and earnest (if sometimes exaggerated) real talk.

Transcript

[Santa]

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line. But first.

There, the last one.

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

Okay, only 10 more presents to wrap. You're almost at the finish line. But first.

There, the last one.

Enjoy a Coca Cola for a pause that refreshes.

[Zoe]

The Burt Show.

[Host Jeff]

All right, this is the last time we'll set up the whole Little Black Book thing because this has gone on for a week. And Jen got a great email from a listener yesterday.

[Co-host Jen]

Yeah, the email I got said, you guys are really talented. I think was the topic of it or something. And it said, you guys took America's most boring couple and turned it into to a week long succession of bits. They said, congratulations, you guys are really talented. And thank God for Psycho Stacy.

[Host Jeff]

It's a real gift, I tell you. Jessica called us up and she said she wanted to get to know her current boyfriend Kevin a little bit better by talking to a different one of his ex girlfriends every single day. The first day we had this girl Stacy on who ended up like this reoccurring theme with her. She called back every single day even though she wasn't invited.

[Caller Melissa]

She was nuts.

[Caller Mike]

Yeah, Stacy had dated Kevin like three years ago, only for six months, but we learned a week ago that she was still doing drive bys, still checking up on him, still, you know, contacting his family. And so she was obviously still all about him. So we realized that as the week went on, she just kind of weaseled her way back into the fold, trying to always give her opinion on what was going on, trying to give Jessica advice on how to be a better girlfriend. Kevin. And yeah, we talked to her every day.

[Host Jeff]

And this was all coming to a conclusion yesterday. We're gonna have Kevin on. We're gonna have Jessica on, find out if she got what she wanted out of the whole week, and then we would send them on their way and never hear from them again. But of course, Stacey Stalker could have none of that. And she breaks in about halfway through.

Hey, Jessica.

[Jessica]

Hey.

[Host Jeff]

How are you today?

[Jessica]

I'm pretty good. How are you guys doing?

[Host Jeff]

Okay. Now this is gonna be the last day we talk to you. I'm sure, I am positive that you and Kevin talked over the weekend about he and Stacy talking on the phone again. How did that go?

[Caller Melissa]

I'd get right to the point.

[Jessica]

Yeah, we talked about it and it turned out it was really. I should have known she was exaggerating how long they talked. And it was a quick conversation where he was trying to be polite from what he told me. So it didn't. It's not something I'm too worried about.

[Caller Melissa]

So she said it was over 45 minutes. How long did he say it was for?

[Jessica]

He said it was. He just said it was like nothing. It was like a few, you know. Hey, how's it going? He was basically just trying to politely get off the phone with her.

[Host Jeff]

All right, let's get Kevin on. Hey, Kevin.

[Kevin]

Hey. How's it going?

[Host Jeff]

Good. How are you today?

[Kevin]

Not too bad.

[Host Jeff]

Now, I'm just curious. Have you listened to this whole thing go down all week?

[Kevin]

No, not really. I mean, off and on, but I kind of. I don't know. It's kind of weird. I, like, listened to the first day, and then I was kind of like, ew, it's kind of creepy. So. But I listened in, and she's been talking to me about it, so.

[Host Jeff]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Kevin]

I'm guessing they're much up to date on it.

[Host Jeff]

I'm guessing there was a call right after. Every time she talked to a different ex girlfriend.

[Caller Melissa]

Yeah.

[Host Jeff]

And told you everything that happened. What were some of those conversations like?

[Kevin]

They weren't nothing dramatic, like, you know, never anything of a big fight nature or anything. Just kind of. Oh, that was a little weird, wasn't it? Yeah. Yeah. You know, and nothing exciting came out of the conversations, but we did, you know, it opened up some dialogue about my family and about different things like that.

[Co-host Jen]

Did you find it surprising, any of the things that the ex girlfriend said about you or said about your breakups or said about your relationships?

[Santa]

No.

[Kevin]

You know what? The only one I think wasn't fair was the one about my mom. Like that Annie said that my mom didn't like her, and I don't think that was the case at all. I think that was.

You know, they had different personality types, but my mother didn't dislike her, and that wasn't the reason we broke up or anything. I just thought that was kind of lame to bring that and, you know. But everything else was cool. Nothing was too embarrassing or anything like that. So I guess I got off pretty easy.

[Caller Mike]

Well, Kevin, I mean, we talked to you a week ago, and you seem pretty confident about how things were going to be fine. And then now you just. I don't know, you used the word creepy the first day you heard it, and then now you. I don't know, it just. You seem a little more closed than you did a week ago. Did things affect you differently than you thought they would?

[Caller Melissa]

No.

[Jessica]

No, I don't I don't.

[Kevin]

I don't think so. I'm just, you know, I'm just more of a. More of a private person and Than my girlfriend. So, you know.

It was just weird for me to hear my own, you know, personal life just on the radio. But it didn't really bother me. It was just kind of like. I don't know, kind of like Twilight Zone Y or something for me. So. But I'm confident, and I was confident when we went into it because I knew that there was nothing. There was nothing very incendiary that would come up with any of these girls. Like, none of them were a really huge breakup that was bitter. You know, call the cops, fighting and stuff like that. So.

[Co-host Jen]

Have there been any of that? Because I can't imagine you having to call the cops fighting over anything.

[Kevin]

No, there haven't. That's why, you know, that's why I was confident that nothing. Nothing would come out here, that I would be ashamed to show my face in public after everybody's heard about it.

[Caller Melissa]

So what was it? Because Jessica kind of touched on this when you and Jessica talked about talking with Stacy.

[Host Jeff]

Yeah.

[Caller Melissa]

When she called you on Thursday.

[Kevin]

Yeah, that was.

It would have been strange, obviously, just a call out of the blue from her, because I haven't. I haven't talked to her since we split up, and.

[Caller Melissa]

But, you know, she stays in touch with your mom. Did you know that?

[Kevin]

Well, that's part of creepy. Yeah. No, I didn't know that. And that. That. That's one of the things that. That did give me the kind of weird feeling. It's like I didn't. I didn't realize that any of my ex girlfriends kept in contact with my mom. And that's a little, you know, just a little odd that she would never say, or. I mean, not that I care, but.

[Caller Melissa]

Did you guys actually talk for. When you talked on Thursday?

[Kevin]

Just. It wasn't very long at all. Probably five, 10 minutes. It was really. I was. Wasn't really interested in the phone call. Kind of caught me off guard. So I. I was, you know, I was just distracted, and I. I talked to her for, you know, as quickly as I could get her off the phone without blatantly hanging up on her. But it was just a quick. Yeah. Hi. How are you doing? It's good to hear from you. And.

[Host Jeff]

Hey, Kevin. One of the things that kind of came up this week, I'm just gonna sound hard to believe that Jessica was saying that she doesn't feel like there's a lot of excitement to the relationship.

And you guys address that at all?

[Kevin]

No, not really. I mean, that's kind of. I think that's kind of a common concern, I don't think something you can switch off in a week, you know, things get. Sometimes get stagnant in relationships, but it can always be fixed, you know?

[Co-host Jen]

Jessica, do you have any ideas about that?

[Jessica]

Well, Kevin, I didn't see that. It's not that. It's not. I don't know.

I'm not sure what the idea. I mean, it's not that it's boring. I don't mean to say that it's boring. I just meant that it's boring.

I just meant that it just, you know, sometimes. I don't know. Now I feel like. I didn't mean for it to come off across like we're boring. I just wanted it to be a little more passionate. Sometimes the only thing that I. I was thinking about, and I don't know if it has anything to do with it, but I was thinking about like, all the porn and everything since it came up, and like, I wonder if.

You know, like just looking at a picture of a girl and then, I don't know, maybe that's sort of like practicing your golf swing the wrong way or something, you know what I mean?

[Host Jeff]

It's like learning how to play golf by reading Golf Digest.

[Jessica]

It's hard to talk about, especially on the phone, but I don't know, I guess that's kind of. I was sort of thinking about that.

[Host Jeff]

Kevin, is that uncomfortable at all that. That came up?

[Kevin]

Yeah, just a touch, so to speak.

[Host Jeff]

What's. I never understood the whole Playboy collection thing. What's that all about?

[Kevin]

Just, I don't know. I got some Playboy, so, you know, that. That bothered women so much. Doesn't seem to like Jessica.

[Host Jeff]

Okay, well, once things start to get a little boring, you can always count on Stacy to give us a.

Stacey's back and would like to talk to both of you guys. Good morning, Stacy.

[Stacy]

Hi, you guys.

[Host Jeff]

Hi. Welcome back.

[Co-host Jen]

Thanks.

[Stacy]

Listen, I just wanted Jessica to know it was not a 10 minute conversation on Thursday. It was a 30 minute conversation. I don't know why Kevin's saying it was only 10, and I just think she should know that I. Kevin, why are you lying?

[Kevin]

Okay. Hey, are we still on the air live?

[Host Jeff]

Are we still what?

[Kevin]

We're on the air live?

[Host Jeff]

Yes, we're on the radio right now.

[Kevin]

All right, I'll hold my tongue. Listen, Stacy, I, you know, catch a point here, but I'm not interested in you all right, so.

[Stacy]

Well, that's fine.

[Kevin]

I didn't talk to you for 45 minutes. I don't know what you're trying to get me to a fight with my girlfriend is about, but it's not gonna break us up. And I don't really care about you. There's a reason I didn't talk to you for three years.

[Stacy]

So, listen, I'm trying to be helpful to Jessica, and I just wanted her to know that it was 30 minutes, it was not 10 minutes. And we had a connection and we talked about our past relationship, and you're trying to minimize it, and she needs to know, that's all.

[Co-host Jen]

You said 45 on Friday.

[Stacy]

Well, I may have exaggerated a little bit. I did. It was at least 30 minutes.

[Caller Mike]

But. Well, let's go back about talking about the past relationship. I mean, what did you talk about?

[Host Jeff]

That I mean, or the connection?

[Caller Mike]

Because Jessica was talking about how Kevin had told her that it was just, you know, he was trying to politely get you off the phone, you know?

[Stacy]

Well, she was. He was a lot more than polite, and it took a long time to get me off the phone. Look, he's not being polite now. He could have just said that. He didn't do that. He was a lot nicer. We talked about good times that we'd had and stuff that we'd shared, and.

[Jessica]

Well, it seems like you're pushing him to the point where he has to say something so bluntly like that to you if you keep calling.

[Stacy]

Jessica, I've been trying to be helpful to you and open, and I'm not trying to push him to do anything or you. I'm just trying to be honest. I don't know why you guys are being so.

[Jessica]

I don't know if maybe you think you're being honest, but maybe you're not being so honest with yourself because you said from the beginning that you still had feelings for him. And then, you know, if that's the case, like I said long time ago to you, seem like you should back off.

[Stacy]

You can't stop somebody from caring about somebody. I have not approached him for those three years. I still care about him. But there is one thing I need to say. Kevin, if the conversation didn't mean that much to you, why didn't you mention the conversation that we had on Saturday?

[Kevin]

Meaning the conversation where I pretty much just told you what I just said now, which was, you gotta not call me every other day because I don't care to hear from you.

[Host Jeff]

Now, hold on a sec. There was another Call on Saturday?

[Jessica]

Yeah.

[Host Jeff]

Kevin, did you tell Jessica about the call on Saturday?

[Kevin]

No. No, because it was. It was a nuisance call. I got rid of that one as fast as I got rid of a telemarketer.

[Caller Melissa]

How long did you guys talk on Saturday? In your best estimate, Stacy, it was like 15 minutes.

[Stacy]

And it wasn't like a telemarketer either.

[Kevin]

It was about 60 seconds tops.

[Jessica]

I don't know.

[Stacy]

I don't know why he's lying, Kevin.

[Kevin]

Hey, Stacy, you got in your little bit of radio fame here. Why don't you hang up and go on your daily life?

[Stacy]

You think that's what this is about? Like being on the radio?

[Kevin]

It's about you being some sort of a weird psycho girl who, at 19, I don't know, was frigged up in the head and I made a big mistake and shouldn't have been with at all. And you got some emotional problems and you keep. Keep in touch with my mom and you're just.

[Stacy]

Okay, you can whatever. You can be as insulting as you want. But you guys started this. Why did you even allow this? What did you think it was? What did you think was going to happen?

[Kevin]

I don't know. I thought I would have an adult relationship with somebody, break up and go on with my life and not have to. Have to talk to them again, you know, three years.

[Stacy]

Okay, so then you allow your current girlfriend to call all your talk to your ex girlfriends. That doesn't sound like what you're saying at all.

[Kevin]

Yeah, I don't care about that. But I. But what I do care about is when I find out that psycho ex girlfriends are still talking to my mom and then won't catch the point and get off the damn line and are being helpful.

[Stacy]

Okay, Just because you break up with someone doesn't. Just because you break up with someone doesn't mean you break up with their family. Okay?

[Kevin]

Okay?

[Stacy]

I have a right to talk to her who I want. And I haven't bothered you for three years and then all of a sudden, like I'm a pariah.

[Jessica]

Keep going on and on, no matter what anyone says to you.

[Kevin]

You're a psycho. You're a psychopath. Good.

[Stacy]

I am not a psycho.

[Jessica]

I'm gonna be. That's it for me. But thanks, guys, for the experiment.

[Host Jeff]

So, Jessica, you're gonna back out now?

[Jessica]

Yeah, I'm just tired of.

[Stacy]

Well, then why have you been complaining so much? That's what I wonder. But yeah, go ahead and hang up. That's fine. I'll leave you alone. I Was just trying to be helpful and open. You asked me questions and I tried to offer answers.

[Jessica]

I'm not trying to be mean to you, Stacy. I just this. I'm saying, fine. If you want to say, I open the can of worms and I say I'm Okay.

[Host Jeff]

Bye.

[Jessica]

Bye. I'll talk to you later.

[Caller Melissa]

Kevin, Just for the record, we're all still here. We're just listening like everybody else. Yeah, the bird shows still.

[Host Jeff]

All right, there it goes. Jessica. Kevin, is there anything last you want to say to Stacy?

[Kevin]

Not really. I mean, I never really had anything to say to her in the beginning.

[Host Jeff]

Hey, Stacy.

[Jessica]

Yes.

[Host Jeff]

Yeah, we're going to let you go at this point. I think you kind of. You kind of know how they feel about you being in their relationship, though, right?

[Stacy]

Yes, I do, but it's very unfair and very mean, and there's nothing wrong with being dedicated and devoted. But whatever. I'll hang up.

[Host Jeff]

What do you mean, dedicated and devoted?

[Caller Melissa]

Stacy.

[Host Jeff]

Stacy. Yeah, what do you mean, dedicated and devoted? You guys broke up three years ago.

[Stacy]

I mean, to a process. To trying to help someone. To try. Listen, I was trying to close something that they opened.

[Co-host Jen]

Okay?

[Stacy]

They opened something that I've been trying really hard to close. And then all of a sudden, they're, like, telling me I can no longer talk to Kevin, or. I mean, I did fine for three years where I just didn't bother him. Okay. And I would hear about what was going on with him from his mom and.

[Caller Melissa]

Are you about to cry?

[Stacy]

What?

[Caller Melissa]

Are you crying?

[Stacy]

I'm not going to cry on the radio. Okay, I'm just going to go. But I just. I think it's really unfair, and I think that they've been very mean, and they should. If they didn't want the truth about what was going on, they never should have done this on the air.

[Caller Melissa]

Wow.

[Host Jeff]

Okay, Stacy, we'll let you go. We don't want this to get all emotional.

[Stacy]

Yeah. All right.

[Kevin]

Bye.

[Host Jeff]

In that way.

[Caller Melissa]

All right, the Birch Show.

[Zoe]

Here's how to stay alive longer so you can enjoy Boost Mobile's unlimited plan.

[Host Jeff]

With the price that never goes up. Do not mistake a wasp nest for a pinata. Stay alive and switch.

[Zoe]

Now at boost mobile, after 30 gigs, customers may experience lower speeds. Customers will pay 25amonth as long as they remain active on the Boost Mobile unlimited plan.

[Santa]

Guys, thanks for helping me carry my Christmas tree.

[Zoe]

Zoe. This thing weighs a ton.

[Kevin]

Drew, ski lift with your legs, man.

[Co-host Jen]

Santa.

[Host Jeff]

Santa, did you get my letter?

[Zoe]

He's talking to you, britches.

[Kevin]

I'm not.

[Santa]

Of course he did. Right, Santa?

[Kevin]

You know my elf Drew Ski here.

[Host Jeff]

He handles the nice list.

[Zoe]

And elf, I'm six three. What everyone wants is iPhone 17 and at T Mobile you can get it on them. That center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies, right, Mrs. Claus?

[Santa]

I'm missing Mrs. Claus's much younger sister. And at T Mobile, there's no trade in needed when you switch. So you can keep your old phone.

[Kevin]

Or give it as a gift.

[Santa]

And the best part, you can make the switch to T Mobile from your phone in just 15 minutes.

[Caller Melissa]

Nice.

[Zoe]

My side of the tree is slipping.

[Caller Melissa]

Kimber.

[Zoe]

The holidays are better. AT T Mobile switch in just 15 minutes and get iPhone 17 on us with no trade in needed. And now T Mobile is available in US cellular stores with 24 monthly bill credits for well qualified customers plus tax and $35 connection charge credit and balance due if you pay off earlier. Cancer financing agreement 256 gigs. $830 eligible for in a new line. $100 plus a month plan with auto pay plus taxes fees required. Check out 15 minutes or less per line.

[Santa]

Visit t mobile.com hi, it's Paige Desorbo from Giggly Squad. You ever stand in front of your closet and just say, I have nothing to wear while you're literally surrounded by clothes? Because same So I started listing pieces. I'm over on Depop and honestly, it's been amazing. You can sell what you're done with and someone out there will love it. And the best part about it is there's no seller fee, so the money you make actually stays in your pocket, which feels very chic. It's also insanely easy. I listed something while watching TV and it sold before the episode even ended. So download the Depop app and list your first item today because your old outfit could be someone else's new favorite. Depop where taste recognizes taste. Payment processing fees, boosting fees still apply. For more info, visit depop.com.

[Host Jeff]

I want to throw this one at you guys because I saw this go down at East Andrews on Friday night. It's about 1:30. No, it must have been about 1 1:15 in the morning or so. And I'm watching a guy and a woman at a bar. But the guy is on one end of the bar and the woman is on the other. And they're doing that our eyes met kind of thing. And he's wondering exactly how to make the approach.

[Co-host Jen]

So your eyes met. Their eyes meeting?

[Host Jeff]

Yeah, I'm observing. All right. As the only Married guy at East Andrews. I'm almost like a student just doing a report. I'm observing everything going on.

[Caller Melissa]

Is that what you tell Stacey?

[Host Jeff]

Yeah, tell some research.

So I'm watching one guy at one end of the bar and the woman at the other end, and they do that oh, oh, thing. And he starts to talk to his buddies about how to make the approach. And it becomes so 8th grade at that point. At the very base of it all is so eighth grade. What do I do? Do I send her a letter that says, will you go with me? Yes. No, maybe. So he decides to do the pretty stereotypical thing, and he buys her a drink. All right? Bartender goes over and says, look, the guy at the end of the bar over there would like to buy you a drink. And she says, fantastic. So she accepts the drink, she starts sipping on it. Then he waits for what he believes to be the appropriate moment, then leaves his pack and goes and makes the approach. And she doesn't give him the time of day, really. I mean, it wasn't even like he couldn't even get hello out. So it wasn't even like he had said something in the first millisecond that had turned her off so badly that she was turned off to the guy. Now she got the drink with no intention at all of talking to this guy. And I just thought, totally bogus, that if a guy buys you a drink, you are at least obligated to engage us in conversation to find out if we're the real deal or not. Am I wrong?

[Caller Mike]

I agree with you. Did the bartender point out who bought her the drink?

[Host Jeff]

Yes. Okay.

[Co-host Jen]

Yeah, I think that's rude.

[Host Jeff]

404-741-1005 now, in her mind, I'm guessing she's just thinking, cool. I'm one of these women that goes to bars and guys buy me drinks all night. I've never spent any money in a bar.

[Caller Melissa]

If I'm the guy, I take the drink out of her hand and walk away. Sorry.

[Host Jeff]

That'd be great.

[Co-host Jen]

Thanks for that glass of wine. I have never had a chardonnay before, but I'd like it now.

[Host Jeff]

Right?

[Caller Melissa]

Like a total femme walking back across the bar with my glass of white wine.

[Host Jeff]

Hi.

[Caller Melissa]

Hi.

[Host Jeff]

How are you?

[Co-host Jen]

Right, But I want it back.

[Stacy]

Give it back to me.

[Caller Mike]

I mean, she, she. She of course, didn't obligate herself to a date with him, but she should have talked. I mean, a conversation is not going to kill her, especially if she accepted the drink that he paid for.

[Co-host Jen]

If she knew she was Going to blow him off or had no interest. She should have not accepted the drink. That's just rude. I mean, we expect for men to be southern gentlemen in this town when we're out and about dating. You better go out with your manners, too.

[Host Jeff]

It seems to me that there are women, though. That, and I've heard women brag about this before, that I haven't bought a drink in 10 years. Well, that may be the case, but you still, if you're gonna accept that drink, you've. You gotta give us something in return. Just a little conversation.

[Co-host Jen]

The hidden message in there is that they're still at the bar getting free drinks after 10 years. So something's not working right.

[Host Jeff]

You know, so we're all in agreement that if you accept a drink from a guy, then you got to at least engage in some kind of conversation.

[Co-host Jen]

Some sort of cordial conversation to at least just be polite. That's just kind of the social rules of the thing.

[Caller Mike]

Well, I think, you know, if. If you get the offer, I mean, that is, you are agreeing to conversation if you say yes to the drink. I totally. I totally think that. Yeah.

[Host Jeff]

Hi, Candice.

[Stacy]

Hi. I totally disagree. That's just an assumption. You're assuming that if I buy her this drink, she's gonna at least talk to me. I don't have to say anything to you. I can say, thanks for the drink and keep it moving. That's it.

[Host Jeff]

See, I think that's so rude.

[Caller Melissa]

I don't think you should expect it.

[Host Jeff]

Wrong. I think that's so rude.

[Stacy]

No, it's not.

[Caller Melissa]

Yes, it is.

[Stacy]

It's just you assuming she doesn't have to talk to him. She probably looked at him at the end of the bar and was like, no, he's not.

[Caller Melissa]

Then she shouldn't. Then she shouldn't have accepted the drink.

[Host Jeff]

Right.

[Caller Melissa]

Then she should say, no, thank you. Please tell him thank you, but no thanks.

[Co-host Jen]

It sounds like there was no confusion as to what was going on here. Because you said they were making eyes at each other.

[Host Jeff]

She almost reeled them in.

[Co-host Jen]

She was reeling him in with the whole thing and then accepted the drink.

[Host Jeff]

Even if, let's say, the I thing wasn't going down, right? And he buys her a drink and. Candace, I'll ask you the same question. Let's say there's no flirtatious looking thing going on, right? And he buys her a drink and the bartender points the guy out that bought her the drink. If she accepts at that point, it means to me, like, all right, he's made the first cut. So I'll accept the drink, and if he comes over and talks to me, then great.

[Co-host Jen]

Well, even.

[Caller Mike]

I mean, I've been in a situation before where. Well, I guess it's always been pointed out who the person buying me the drink was. I'm trying to think if there's been a blind, you know, offer and I've taken it. I still know that somebody's about to come up and talk to me and I engage in conversation. But if I end up not being interested, I will. I will cut it off pretty short, but I still will talk to them. You know what I'm saying?

[Stacy]

So it seemed like she didn't even want to talk to him to begin with. She just wanted a free drink. So what she should have done was held the drink up like a thank you kind of thing and then walked away. And then he wouldn't have walked to her and talked to her.

[Host Jeff]

If you hold that drink up and you give me that little cheers thing, that's giving me another green light, though.

[Co-host Jen]

But what she's saying is she should have gave him the cheers, thank you, stood up from the bar, turned around and walked away so that he, from his buddies didn't have to make the whole walk of shame.

[Host Jeff]

Still rude, don't you think?

[Co-host Jen]

I think so too.

[Host Jeff]

Still rude.

[Co-host Jen]

Yeah.

[Caller Melissa]

There's actually even more rude.

[Co-host Jen]

No, not as embarrassing for him, but still rude.

[Caller Melissa]

No, that's just as embarrassing for him.

[Host Jeff]

Totally.

[Co-host Jen]

You think?

[Caller Melissa]

If I'm there with half a dozen guys and we're hanging out and I work up the nerve to send you a drink, and I send it down to you, and you take the drink, toast me from a hundred feet away, and then walk the opposite direction, I would never live down that from the other five.

[Host Jeff]

The ridicule from the path that you are running with that night would be ruthless.

[Co-host Jen]

What if I mouth to you, I gotta go to the bathroom. I'll be right back? No, doesn't work.

[Caller Melissa]

No.

[Host Jeff]

You take a drink from me. You have got to at least give me a chance to get to know you. For you. Got to give me a couple of minutes.

[Co-host Jen]

How many minutes?

[Host Jeff]

I just spent five bucks on you. And you know, in this town, maybe I just spent nine bucks on you on a drink.

[Caller Melissa]

Three.

[Co-host Jen]

Three minutes.

[Caller Melissa]

Yeah. Like, hey, thank you so much for the drink. No problem. You know, what's your name? My name's Jen. Hey, Jen, I'm Jeff. You know, what are you doing? I'm here with some girlfriends or sell me. Oh, you know, and then. Then you could say Politely, you know, like, as a matter of fact, I have to go meet my girlfriends in the patio right now. Maybe I'll see in a little bit. And then the guy. You've given him enough time that the guy can go back to, you know, his guy friends and say, you know, whatever.

[Co-host Jen]

Like, I am so taking that home later.

[Caller Melissa]

Right?

[Co-host Jen]

That's what you go back to your friends and say, Right?

[Caller Melissa]

She's going out to the patio and she's here with girlfriends. We'll have to make her way out.

[Host Jeff]

I'm gonna take it one step further. If I buy you a drink that costs more than $9, you're obligated to French kiss me.

[Co-host Jen]

Duh.

[Host Jeff]

No.

Just trying. Working for you guys. Just working.

[Caller Mike]

I just said, this is so eighth grade. You have to French kiss me.

[Zoe]

I know.

[Co-host Jen]

Did you get the visual beat?

[Caller Mike]

Tongue.

[Co-host Jen]

Oh.

[Caller Mike]

I mean, just a whole open mouth.

[Co-host Jen]

And him.

[Host Jeff]

Yeah, you gotta at least let me go to second base.

[Co-host Jen]

Him going in.

[Caller Melissa]

If your drink costs ten or more dollars, I get to touch one boob.

[Host Jeff]

For 10 seconds when I go in for a kiss. It's when you used to watch Charlie Brown. He used to yell really loud, and you just see his ovula dangling in the background.

[Co-host Jen]

Oh, my God.

[Host Jeff]

Hey, Robin. What's going on?

[Stacy]

Hey, good morning, guys. I am so with you guys. Listen, if I'm buying you a drink, I'm the guy. I'm walking over and saying, hey, bitch, you better give me my money back. Oh, no, you with me?

[Host Jeff]

I'm serious. That is rude, I think, Jess. Right? It's gotta be at least three minutes.

[Stacy]

I mean, at least. I mean, if you have the audacity to take this guy's money and drink his drink that he just bought you, you at least owe me a hey, how are you? You know, I may not be interested, but, you know, still.

[Host Jeff]

Yeah, And a quick French kiss.

[Caller Mike]

The whole reason he's buying you a drink is to break the ice and open up conversation. Because he likes you. I mean, there's that understanding a woman has when she's made the offer. And if you accept it, you accept a conversation. I totally believe that. Yeah.

[Host Jeff]

Jenny.

[Stacy]

Yeah.

[Host Jeff]

Hola.

[Stacy]

Hey, good morning, y'. All.

[Caller Mike]

He's so bilingual.

[Caller Melissa]

See, especially when you have, like, a nice Hispanic listener, like. Like somebody named Jenny.

[Host Jeff]

What's going on? Que pasa?

[Stacy]

Oh, I just wanted to really disagree with the last caller. Like, when me and my friends go out, we totally don't accept drinks for guys for that same fat, but we won't lead them on. And have that incident happen. We just, like, say, no.

[Host Jeff]

I think that's fair. Because if all of my friends are watching me buy a drink for a woman and she turns me down, I'm gonna get a certain amount of crap anyway. But if you accept the drink, then you won't talk to me, or you get up and you walk away. That's ruthless.

[Co-host Jen]

And they're like, oh, you got used.

[Zoe]

Or.

[Caller Melissa]

But if. Like, if you go up to the bar, what you got to do is you got to remember that the most important thing to a guy when he's out at a club like that, besides hook it up, even above hooking up, is his reputation to the guys he's there with. So if you go up and, you know, deny a drink. If I go up to the bartender and go, hi. Like, send that girl down there. You know, Drink, please. And then he goes down to Jen and she says, no, I don't want it. Ew. Look at him. No way. Ew. Get him. No.

[Kevin]

Ew.

[Caller Melissa]

Security. And the bartender comes back and says, I'm sorry. She doesn't want to drink. Then guess what? I can turn around and make a guy friends and go, oh, false alarm. She's engaged. The guys will never. Oh, didn't know this, but she's playing on Melissa's team, if you know what I mean.

[Caller Mike]

Yeah, she didn't want me, so she.

[Host Jeff]

Must be a lesbian, right?

[Caller Melissa]

You know, so. So that's what you got the girls. When you're out, your primary objective should be to help guys save face.

[Caller Mike]

Of course.

[Caller Melissa]

That's what you should be always. When you're breeding. If you want to be successful and find guys, you know, to have relationships with, you should always be looking at ways to protect them.

[Host Jeff]

And if that takes a French kiss, then so be it.

[Caller Melissa]

Are you. Are you okay? Are you and Stacy okay?

[Host Jeff]

I just think that's so funny. French kiss.

[Caller Melissa]

As a guy, what do you do if you send a drink to a girl at a bar and the bartender delivers it to the wrong girl and she's just heinous, like, do you.

[Host Jeff]

Then you're in. Then. Then you are obligated to talk to the girl the drink goes to. The bartender could so screw with you. Yeah, with great power.

[Caller Melissa]

I would love. If I was a bartender, I would do that all the time.

[Co-host Jen]

Like, you mean this one over here? This one? This one. Oh, okay, I got you this one.

[Caller Melissa]

And then give it to the one next door.

[Host Jeff]

There's another reason to tip heavy on that first drink, because if you don't they will screw you later. Hey, T.C. you'll be the last call, man.

[Kevin]

Hey, how's it going everybody?

[Host Jeff]

Good. Good to talk to you.

[Kevin]

The title that y' all are talking about is A drink Hoe. Oh, and that's exactly what what it is. She's just there to get a drink and that's it. And you walk back over to the voice. Oh, she was a drink hoe. That's it.

[Co-host Jen]

How different is the drink hoe from the gold diggin hoe?

[Kevin]

The difference is a gold digging hoe will talk to you to try and get something out of you. But a drink hoe will just up and go.

[Caller Melissa]

Okay, a drink hoe is one drink. A gold digging hoe as many drinks.

[Host Jeff]

That's so wrong. That's so wrong. I mean, what's three minutes? I buy you a drink. I would like to find the woman that has gone the longest, the longest time period not buying herself a drink.

[Caller Melissa]

Oh, they all lie.

[Host Jeff]

I think they'll. They'll say like oh, five years.

[Caller Melissa]

I haven't bought a drink since I turned 21. And if I had a voice like this, no man would ever date me.

[Host Jeff]

The Burch Show.

[Co-host Jen]

Big news.

[Host Jeff]

Boost Mobile is now sending experts nationwide.

[Co-host Jen]

To deliver and set up customers new phones at home or work.

[Zoe]

Wait, we're going on tour?

[Co-host Jen]

Not a tour. We're delivering and setting up customers phones so it's easier to upgrade.

[Zoe]

Let's get in the tour bus and hit the road.

[Co-host Jen]

No, not a tour bus. It's a regular car we use to deliver and set up customers phones at home or work.

[Zoe]

Are you a groupie on this tour?

[Co-host Jen]

We deliver and set up phones. It's not a tour.

[Zoe]

Oh, you're definitely a groupie.

[Co-host Jen]

Introducing store to door Switch and get.

[Host Jeff]

A new device with expert setup and delivery wherever you're at.

[Zoe]

Delivery available for select devices [e-mail] the.

[Stacy]

Holidays are coming and I've got a.

[Co-host Jen]

Boost Mobile gift just for you. Aww, for me? Anna? Yes, Anna, you deserve a gift.

[Santa]

The Boost Mobile unlimited plan is just.

[Co-host Jen]

$10 a month for the first two months. Then 25amonth forever with unlimited data, talk and text.

[Caller Mike]

It's a gift.

[Co-host Jen]

Thanks, Anna. Anytime, Anna.

[Zoe]

The holidays are here and the best gift is for you. Offer [e-mail] after your first two months, you'll pay 25amonth unless you go online or call to cancel. Requires autopay.

[Santa]

Guys, thanks for helping me carry my Christmas tree.

[Zoe]

Zoe. This thing weighs a ton.

[Kevin]

Live with your legs, man.

[Santa]

Santa.

[Host Jeff]

Santa, did you get my letter.

[Zoe]

He's talking to you, Bridges.

[Kevin]

I'm not.

[Santa]

Of course he did. Right Santa?

[Kevin]

You know my elf Drew here, he.

[Zoe]

Handles the nice list and elf, I'm six' three. What everyone wants is iPhone 17 and at T Mobile you can get it on them. That center stage front camera is amazing for group selfies. Right Mrs. Claus?

[Santa]

I'm Mrs. Claus's much younger sister and at T Mobile there's no trade in needed when you switch. So you can keep your old phone.

[Kevin]

Or give it as a gift.

[Santa]

And the best part, you can make the switch to T mobile from your phone in just 15 minutes.

[Caller Melissa]

Nice.

[Zoe]

My size of the tree is slipping. Kimber the holidays are better. AT T Mobile switch in just 15 minutes and get iPhone 17 on us with no trade in needed. And now T Mobile is available in US cellular stores with 24 month bill credits for well qualified customers plus tax and $35 device connection charge credit sentinel balance too. If you pay off earlier, cancel financing agreement. 256 gigs $830 eligible for in a new line 100 plus a month plan with auto pay plus taxes fees required. Check out 15 minutes or less per line. Visit t mobile dot com.