The Bert Show — Full Show PT 1: Monday, March 9 (2026)

Podcast: The Bert Show
Date: March 9, 2026
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and others
Notable Guests: Taylor Lautner (special segment)

Episode Overview

This episode dives into the aftermath of the show's "Vice Week"—a challenge where each cast member gave up a personal vice for the week. The conversation candidly explores the emotional and psychological effects of withdrawal, addiction, and self-discipline, particularly as cast members struggle with issues like sleep aids, diet pills, sugar, and cigarettes. The episode also features a lively and thoughtful interview with Twilight star Taylor Lautner, and a sobering group reaction to a controversial viral video of a man swinging a baby, examining the risks and possible fakeness of the clip.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Aftermath of "Vice Week": Withdrawal, Struggle & Self-Reflection

• Bert Quitting Lunesta (Sleep Medication):

  • Bert shares his experience going off sleep medication, describing increased anxiety and sleep disturbances as the week went on.
  • He highlights mental hurdles associated with insomnia, noting,

    "A lot of it is just in your head. It's the fear that you have that you're not going to sleep that is actually keeping you up." — Bert (00:56)

  • To avoid temptation, Bert asks a colleague to hold onto his pills. He is determined not to relapse immediately, but is honest about the struggle.

    "If they're in my house, I know I'll take them." — Bert (01:49)

• Wendy and Diet Pills:

  • Wendy opens up about her dependence on diet pills, their impact on her mood and physical health, and the challenges she faced without them during vice week.
  • She admits using them like an antidepressant, expressing vulnerability about her emotional state:

    "When I'm alone... I'm in a really down mood. So these pills, like, kind of make me in a better mood. So, yeah, sort of. They're my antidepressants." — Wendy (03:15)

  • Wendy is conflicted about whether she'll return to dieting pills, acknowledging their negative health impacts but craving the “pick-me-up” effect.

• Group Reflection on Mental Health & Dependence:

  • Bert and Melissa highlight how medication can sometimes mask deeper psychological needs:

    "The band-aid of the medication... you need to work on your head." — Bert (06:08)

  • Wendy resonates with this, especially after hearing a story from another cast member, Stacy, about painkiller addiction, drawing parallels to her own situation.

    "These pills are doing the exact same thing for me that those pain pills did for Stacy." — Wendy (06:29)

• Smoking, Sugar, and Other Vices:

  • Melissa discusses abstaining from sugar, emphasizing the self-discipline needed when faced with daily temptations in the office.

    “A lot of times with some of these vices, you have to have incredible self-discipline because you see people around you doing it… it’s up to you. The responsibility is yours.” — Melissa (10:27)

  • Jen confesses she struggled most with quitting cigarettes, barely making it through one smoke-free day.

    "I'm not. I'm not. I'm sorry." — Jen, on being unprepared and unwilling to quit (11:37)

  • The group humorously discusses their lack of readiness — “jumping on the bandwagon” — and differences in how people handle habit change.

• Addiction as Emotional Bandage:

  • Calls and listener interactions reinforce the theme of medication (or substances like sugar/cigarettes) as coping tools for underlying distress.
  • Wendy is particularly honest about her distrust of therapy and people in general, and her difficulty in confronting vulnerability:

    "I don't even trust a therapist at this point… it's just the whole trust issue." — Wendy (08:09) "It’s hard to admit as a person because I'm always trying to be a good person, be happy… but there’s a period when you go home and you’re just not happy." — Wendy (07:37)

2. Interview: Taylor Lautner on 'Twilight' and Sudden Fame

(Segment begins at 13:53)

• Taylor Lautner Joins for a Call-in Interview:
  • The cast welcomes Taylor (Jacob Black in Twilight) and discusses the Twilight movie's explosive release.

    "This thing, this thing has the potential of being big. And I was like, really? I'd never heard of it before in my life." — Taylor Lautner (15:15)

  • Taylor confesses he had not read the books before casting and was surprised by the series’ passionate fan base.

    "There is nothing stronger or more excited than a 14 or teenage Twilight [fan]." — Taylor Lautner (16:11)

  • He shares the intensity of promotional tours, meeting enthusiastic crowds, and preparing for international spotlight.
  • Discussion includes navigating sudden fame, his supportive family (who all read the series), and advice for managing expectations (particularly regarding potential sequels).
  • Memorable exchange:

    "Who's the first person you're gonna call that you're able to call now, celebrity wise, that you weren't able to call today?" — Katie
    "Funny thing is… I hear somebody going, 'Taylor, Taylor.' I turn around and it's Jamie Foxx. 'My daughter's a huge fan. Can I get a picture?'" — Taylor Lautner (19:43)

  • Taylor gamely records a promotional drop for the show's ticket giveaway, getting teased by the cast over pronouncing “Q100.”

3. Viral Video Debate: Man Swinging Baby

(Segment begins at 21:20)

• The Team Reacts to a Controversial Viral Video:
  • A heated group discussion analyzes a video showing a man swinging a baby in alarming ways, possibly for entertainment.
  • Varied initial reactions: disbelief, outrage, horror, and speculation on whether the video is real or faked with special effects.
  • Emotional responses:

    "Even if it's fake, it's just not funny to joke about." — Katie (25:54) "I hope that this is fake because that is sick." — Melissa (25:17)

  • Several callers weigh in, expressing disgust, concern for the child’s safety, and theorizing about the man's possible background (acrobatic family). Others consider the psychological and physical risks (joint dislocation, brain injury).
  • The conversation also touches on the impact of viral culture, responsibility in sharing/shaming, and fears about people imitating dangerous stunts.

    "There's always one idiot out there." — Katie (23:26)

  • The cast admits gendered biases in their reaction (assuming a mother wouldn’t do this), and questions why there hasn't been a visible investigation.

    "There are laws and, you know, there's police and there are defects, quote, unquote, all over the world. So I can't believe this hasn't been investigated." — Burt (29:55)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Vices & Mental Health:

  • "It's okay if you get six hours of sleep. And you're gonna be fine if you just get five hours..." — Bert (01:02)
  • "I need this pill to make me feel better. I was begging my friend to find me one..." — Wendy (02:58)
  • "The band aid of the medication, your band aid, are the speed pills that are giving you this false feeling..." — Bert (06:08)

• On Fame:

  • "There is nothing stronger or more excited than a 14 or teenage Twilight [fan]." — Taylor Lautner (16:11)

• On Parenting and the Viral Video:

  • “It could have had such disastrous... I just don’t want some dumbass to copy this video and think that this is a thing to do.” — Katie (23:07)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:01–06:39]: Vice Week Wrap-Up — Struggles with quitting sleep meds, diet pills, sugar, and cigarettes
• [13:53–21:19]: Interview with Taylor Lautner (Twilight) — Fan hysteria, fame, his family's support, and funny Jamie Foxx encounter
• [21:20–31:14]: Viral Video Discussion — Cast watches and discusses the controversial "swinging baby" video, with live reactions and calls

Episode Tone & Style

Conversational, heartfelt, transparent, sometimes irreverent but always authentic. The cast balances humor with serious, honest dialogue about challenging personal issues and pop culture happenings.

This episode offers a deeply relatable peek into facing personal challenges and mental health, while also engaging listeners with high-profile celebrity insights and topical debates.