Full Show PT 1: Tuesday, June 16 [Vault]

Summary

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The Bert Show – Full Show PT 1: Tuesday, June 16 [Vault]

Episode Date: June 16, 2026
Cast: Bert (Host), Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & the Bert Show Cast
Summary Covers: Main content from 01:30–49:42

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Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show lives up to its tradition of mixing humor, candid life moments, and real listener drama. The cast tackles difficult workplace dynamics, office sabotage, personal vulnerability, and overcoming addiction. The conversations veer from dramatic "soap opera" office politics to personal growth, all infused with the show’s characteristic banter.

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1. Workplace Hostility: Tammy’s HR Dilemma

[01:30 - 10:22]

Main Topic:
Tammy, an HR and office manager, is being ostracized and slandered by a male coworker. She believes the toxic environment and this man's actions could hurt her career, and faces the tricky position of being an HR professional victimized at work.

Key Points & Insights

• Hostile Work Environment:

  • Tammy accuses a coworker of calling her derogatory names and spreading damaging rumors among colleagues and vendors.
    • Tammy: "This guy's, like, going around calling me a vitch at the office, to the salespeople and our vendors." [02:04]
  • She suspects he feels threatened because she knows of his misconduct, including company credit card abuses and addictions.

• The HR Paradox:

  • As HR, Tammy should know procedures, but is at a loss.
    • Bert: "Who does a human resources person go to if they're the ones being harassed?" [03:02]
  • Tammy claims the coworker is protected by the boss due to his essential skills/sales.

• Skepticism from Co-Hosts:

  • The team presses Tammy for specifics, suspecting more is at play, and point out the double-edged sword of knowing office secrets.
    • Co-host: "You're going back into what he's doing...but you're gossiping about him" [05:56]
  • Multiple co-hosts challenge her to remain professional and avoid gossip, no matter the frustration.

• Practical Advice:

  • As an HR professional, Tammy would advise direct confrontation or escalating to a boss. Tammy reports the boss "doesn't want to hear it," placing her in a double-bind.
    • Tammy: "It's kind of hard to do something to someone that the boss really...cares about." [07:56]

• Power Dynamics:

  • Discussion centers on why problematic employees are sometimes protected at the expense of workplace wellbeing.
    • Bert: "This other employee must be contributing to the bottom line pretty well." [09:09]

• Closing Note from Co-Host:

  • "Stay as professional as possible...be the best HR person you can be, and things work out."* [09:53]

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2. Sabotage & Soap Opera Office Drama

[10:22 - 23:18]

Call-In Stories – Real-Life Saboteurs

• Producer Joanna’s Tale [18:18]

  • Joanna shares a friend's story: a fiancée’s ex-girlfriend cancels a wedding venue by impersonating the bride over the phone—a classic "soap opera" sabotage.
    • Joanna: "Her fiancé’s ex-girlfriend called...pretending to be her and canceled her reception." [19:18]
    • "That is evil." – Bert [19:50]

• The Hockey Team Set-Up [19:56]

  • A caller relates how unwanted teammate's bag was planted with cocaine to get him off the team.
    • Caller: "We stuck some cocaine on his back...that's the only way to get rid of him." [20:34]
    • Justifies it due to his behavior: "He did a lot of horrible things...tried to get our wives, you know, in bed." [19:56]

• Saboteur at Work [21:55]

  • Another caller confesses to making a disliked coworker's life miserable—throwing out snacks, misleading her about shift schedules, and turning the boss against her.
    • Caller: "Since I didn’t like her, I decided I was gonna make her life not so pleasant at work." [21:55]

Host Commentary

• "So it does happen. Yes, it does happen." – Bert [22:58]
• The team expresses both shock and fascination at real-life underhanded office tactics.

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3. Getting Personal: Bert’s Medical Vulnerabilities

[23:19 - 26:55]

Bert’s Doctor Visit Awkwardness

• Bert candidly discusses two doctor appointments for sports injuries (herniated gym injury, bad knee).
• His discomfort stems less from the exam, more from having his wife in the room while another male (the doctor) examines his genitals.
  • "I was really uncomfortable watching my wife have another dude handle my junk." – Bert [25:37]
• Larger discussion about male and female vulnerability during medical checkups.
  • "That's vulnerable...Because it's, you know, that's vulnerable." – Co-host [26:47]

Memorable Moment:

• Bert grapples with male insecurity and social expectations, contrasting gynecological visits with male exams.

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4. Listener Calls: Workplace, Superstition, and Support

[28:05 - 32:35]

Fishing “Bad Mojo”

• Bert laments never catching a marlin despite multiple attempts, readers call in with their own first-time success stories (often to his comedic dismay).
  • "I am just cursed, jinxed when it comes to fishing." – Bert [31:07]
• The team learns about the “banana superstition” among anglers.

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5. Breaking Addiction: Jen’s Smoking Cessation Journey

[32:16 - 41:29]

Jen’s Story: Hypnosis and Quitting Smoking

• Jen discusses being one week smoke-free after hypnosis.
  • "Today by 11:30 will be a full week...hypnotized a week ago to stop smoking, and it has worked." [32:20]
• Describes the lingering physical and psychological withdrawal symptoms.
  • "I wake up like, 'oh, wow, I don’t have that taste in my mouth...I don’t feel really gross.'" [33:44]
• Hypnotherapy techniques:
  • Visualization of "best self" vs. "smoking self"
  • Breathing techniques paired with focus words like "calm" or "peace"
  • Shift in self-talk: "That’s okay, because I just don’t smoke anymore." [36:17]
• Importance of social support, removing all cigarettes from her environment, and open communication with friends.
  • "I would have gone to get [a cigarette]...the fact that I haven't had it around me at all, and...told everyone I know that I've stopped smoking...helped support me." [38:27]
• Listeners call in to share struggles quitting, ask practical questions (e.g., about drinking and cravings), and express hope inspired by Jen’s story.

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6. Workplace Poll Fallout: Boss Man Returns

[42:33 - 49:42]

Revisiting a Listener Workplace Poll

• Recap: Listeners voted whether Sally or Jenny should get a raise; Jenny "won," but Sally objected, alleging a rigged poll, and “Boss Man” returns to update.
• The exchange is muddled, with Boss Man acting evasive (possibly pressured), leading to confusion and suspicion among the hosts and callers.
  • "Something doesn't smell right to me. Like you sound so strange today." – Bert [45:57]
  • "He doesn't sound like much of a boss." – Co-host [47:20]
• Listener reactions range from skepticism (is the company even real?) to critique of the boss's competence.
  • "Not sure this is a legit company. It sounds like they may be trying to pull one over on you guys." – Tori, Caller [48:21]
• General frustration on-air about the lack of transparency and conclusion.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Workplace Sabotage:
  "I want soap opera drama. I want Young and the Restless. I want Housewife watching it at 2 in the afternoon."
  — Co-host, [13:36]

• On Professionalism in Toxic Environments:
  "Your part is to stay as professional as possible...be the best HR person you can be, and things work out."
  — Co-host, [09:53]

• On Quitting Smoking:
  "This may be a potentially difficult situation, but that’s okay...because I just don’t smoke anymore."
  — Jen, [36:17]

• On Seeing the Humor in Office Drama:
  "Yours is boring. We found another direction. Where's Joanna?"
  — Co-host, shifting from workplace drama to listener sabotage stories [14:49]

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Episode Flow & Tone

• Language & Tone:
  Unsparingly honest, sarcastic, and playful; the show toggles between serious advice and outright comedic storytelling.

• Structure:
  The segments mix live calls, in-studio discussions, and personal stories, ably shepherded by Bert and a lively supporting cast.

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Timestamps of Key Segments

• Tammy’s HR Drama: 01:30 – 10:22
• Saboteur Call-In Stories: 10:22 – 23:18
• Bert’s Doctor Appointment: 23:19 – 26:55
• Fishing Bad Luck/Listener Calls: 28:05 – 32:35
• Jen’s Smoking Journey: 32:16 – 41:29
• Boss Man Returns (Office Poll): 42:33 – 49:42

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For show highlights, advice, and entertaining drama, this episode is quintessential Bert Show—mixing reality, humor, and heart with plenty of listener involvement.

Transcript

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

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[Bert (Main Host)]

The Birch show so Tammy here needs some Birch show community love because she's in a tough spot at work, and not only is it rough for her where she's working now, but she thinks there's a. There's somebody in the office that's doing some such hateful things to her that it is gonna affect her future jobs as well, and she's not exactly sure how to handle it. Hey, Tammy.

[Boss Man]

Hey, good morning.

[Bert (Main Host)]

You're on the voice disguiser. All right, so what's going on in the office that could be so bad that it's affecting now, but also future jobs that you don't even have yet?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Well, I don't know if I'm allowed to like cuss or anything with you guys. But this guy's, like, going around calling me a vitch at the office, the salespeople that work there, and also our vendors. Oh, I don't know what his problem is. I don't know if he feels threatened with me because I know a bunch of stuff about him.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Have you ever threatened to use the stuff that you know about him in a negative way or anything? Like what?

[G (Caller or Guest)]

What?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

I've never said anything to him about what he's done. I mean, what he's done is awful. But, you know, I've never, ever used that over him. It's just, I guess he thinks because I know all this stuff, that if people become friends with me or have conversations with me, that I'm going to let all this out because I am the office manager, human resource person. And there's just a lot of stuff that's happened.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That's an interesting. That's an interesting question. Like, who does a human resources person go to if they're the ones being harassed? Let me ask you this, though. It's an obvious question. What is some of the stuff that you have on him that he's nervous that would come out? Is it personal stuff? Is it professional stuff?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

He said a lot of stuff with our company credit card. That is like a. No, no. And I know that if he worked anywhere else, he would be gone. And he's got some pretty serious addictions. So, you know, supposedly he was supposed to be getting help for these addictions, and it's only gotten worse. And now, you know, it's like, I have people who have worked at our office and are gone and now have, you know, I'm still friends with, and they've come back and told me, you know, some things that he has said about me, which I think is absolutely ridiculous.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Well, you're the HR person. Aren't you supposed to know how to deal with these situations?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Yeah, well, you would think. But, you know, he's got our balls pretty wrapped around his finger. I mean, he thinks, you know, where he works. He's the only one that knows everything about everything.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Now there, I mean, it's.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

It's.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

It's at the point where it sounds a little petty. So there's two sides to every story. So if you were defending him, because I'm curious if. I mean, the boss is wrapped around his finger, he's talking to the vendors, he's using, you know, derogatory terms when it comes to you. What. How would you argue his side of the story? Like, why is he targeting you? If you've never had a hostile interaction with him, or have you?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

No, it's just, I think, because I know stuff, I think he feels threatened with me.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

And you've never.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Your interactions with each other, are they tense, are they mean?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

We don't really talk. It's. Hand me this, hand me that. Never really carries on a kind of.

[Bert (Main Host)]

It's so murky.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah. You're leaving a big chunk of the story out. Something happened. You can't say, because I think you keep going back to the I think he feels threatened type of a thing.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Well, if you just knew the stuff that I knew, which I really can't go, I guess I didn't know all that stuff.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Right. But what. You know, we can accept that you know significant things about him. What have you said to him or what has given him the impression that, like, do you think maybe in a social conversation you said something to a co worker that was inappropriate? You as the HR director, that may have gotten back to him, and now he thinks you're spreading gossip? Could that have happened?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

No, because, I mean. No, I just really. I tell you, the people that have worked there and that have gotten let go by this particular person.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

But see, you're good. You're going back into what he's doing. Like, you're talking about him and your. Your friends from ex employees. You're gossiping about him. Like, you know, like, for instance, I have a very professional relationship with her HR person. I've worked with her for many years, and there's no reason for me to go around and start calling her names, you know, out of the blue. Like they're. That just. Yeah, something. Something doesn't make sense here.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Tammy, as the HR person, if we're not talking about you, if an employee came to you with the very same problem as the HR person, what's the advice that you give to them?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

I would tell them to talk about it with that person if they could.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Have you talked about it with that person?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Yeah, I have. I've confronted him.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Okay.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

What do you say?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

He denied it.

[Bert (Main Host)]

He said, there's nothing going on here. It's all in your head.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Oh, I would never do that. I would never.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

So how do you know the vendors? The conversation he's had with the vendors, how are you aware of that?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Because they've told me.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

They've come back and said, this guy's.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Yeah, because I'm like, you know, there's just been some incident. Instance. Instances where people have come into our office and, you know, they're not allowed to. I mean, they don't speak to me or anything, you know, And I'm like,

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

this is weird, Timmy, because.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Because you feel like you need to sort of protect your identity and you can't give us the details. Most people are calling up saying there's nothing they can do for you because we don't. We can't really connect with your story because we just don't have details.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I just wonder, like in. In more of a general sense, like, what do you do when somebody's hateful to you at work?

[Bert (Main Host)]

You go to boss. Right. I mean, if. If you're the HR person, the only other person for you to go to is the boss. Correct.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

And he don't want to hear it.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Why?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I mean, you should be able to file some sort of, like, official complaint.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

This, like, badgering or hateful behavior. Here's what's happening, right?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Like, it's kind of hard to do something to someone that the boss really, you know, cares about, I guess you could say, because, you know, when I go to this particular person, like my boss, he doesn't want to hear that. He don't want to hear anything, you know, and if you say anything, it's. You're picking on him.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Well, here's what I'm hearing, because I certainly have been guilty of nonsense in my past. Maybe even yesterday or last week or

[Bert (Main Host)]

recently between 6 and 6:30, I think it happened a couple times.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

But you're guilty of something and you know it. Or else you would go to the boss. Like, the only reason I would hesitate talking to a boss who even had a teacher's pet employee is if I was also guilty of something. If there was something. Because if you go to the. If this guy's harassing you and talking badly to you, to mutual business relationships, that's something that I, as a boss, even if I loved that employee, that's something that I would want to hear. And the only reason that I could see an employee not coming to the boss is if they too, had something on their plate that made them guilty.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Let me throw something else onto the plate here also, is that this other employee must be contributing to the bottom line pretty well. He must be pretty productive. Or the boss would listen to you and would make adjustments. I don't know if this guy's making more money than you do for the company, but professionally, there has to be a reason why the boss is sticking up for this guy.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Well, I think he just probably hit it because I don't do what he does.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Is he a sales guy and he just brings in a ton of cash to the company?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Not a ton, but I'm not. You see what I'm saying?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yep.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

So.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

And I think that he's probably thinking

[Bert (Main Host)]

HR people can be replaced. A salesperson that's bringing in a whole bunch of money into the company at this point is probably more difficult to replace.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Yeah. My thing also is that you can only do your part, and your part is to stay as professional as possible. I don't know about gossiping about him, but with ex employees, because I'm not sure that it's not getting back to him. Obviously, if the vendors are coming to you, they care about you and they trust you, so they're reporting to you. So I wouldn't worry about the vendors and their opinions. Like, I think you're getting too worked up into the emotional part of this. And I feel like you just be professional, be the best HR person you can be, and things work out. Like, it all. It all works out.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Let me just go ahead and take a couple of quick calls here because we don't have too much time. Hey, Nicole, good Morning. You're on Q100.

[K (Caller)]

Good morning.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hi.

[K (Caller)]

Okay, so I. My personal, you know, belief on this is that the only reason he would be, you know, spreading all these rumors about her is that he is just extremely threatened by the fact that she knows, you know, she has all this dirt on him. So he's probably just trying to even the playing field a bit.

[Boss Man]

I don't know.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I mean, but if you've got dirt on him, that means the. I mean, dirt. If there's been reports on him and you have it on file about all the things he's done, the. The company has that. That's not you personally trying to have a vendetta against him.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Here's Erin. Good morning. Erin, you're part of the Burt Show.

[K (Caller)]

Good morning. How are you?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Okay, thank you.

[K (Caller)]

Good. Doesn't she have, like, a equal opportunity employer or an office that she can go to? Where I work, we have an office that's set up just for this, where we go and you file a grievance. Once you file that grievance, there's a mediator that comes in. If there's witnesses to his actions, if there are people that are willing to write statements that say, yes, he said these things about her, then they can sit down at a table with a mediator and discuss it, and that be the end of it.

[Bert (Main Host)]

But, Tammy, you should know all this as the HR person, shouldn't you be giving yourself this advice?

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Well, we don't have that. Is that what she's saying? There's something at our office? I mean, we're not that big. You hear what I'm saying? I don't have anything like that.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

You know what? Let's give her the benefit of the doubt. And this might take us in a different direction at some other point in the show, but let's give her the benefit of the doubt. And what if she works in an office where this guy just has it out for her? Think Young and the Restless, soap opera style. He has decided and he has talked to his friends, he has decided he's gonna do everything in his power to. To get her fired for whatever reason. Who knows what the scandal is. We're assuming that that doesn't happen, that this is just unbelievable, that that can't happen.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Oh, I don't assume that.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I don't assume that either. If she would give us the details then or could give us the details. You're saying there are no other details?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

What if there are no other details? What if it's, you know, we see it all the time on soap operas where, you know, Jen and I are talking inside in the house, in our living room with our shoes on and we're having a conversation and not any shoes. Full on dress shoes. And Jen's got her makeup completely done and I'm probably wearing a suit.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

And you never go to the bathroom.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

And we're at the home, we're at a very fancy dinner table and Jen leans over to me and says, listen, I was gonna try not to get involved, but the wedding between Wendy and Carl needs to end. And I'll say, we can bring it to a stop. And you say, I'm gonna call Bert and have him create a distraction. And then I'll say, you do that and I'll call Melissa. And you know what? We'll have Melissa start a lesbian love affair with Wendy. And Jen goes, yeah, that's a great idea.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Somebody ends up in the hospital weirdly enough, right?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

And then next broken arm. Next scene, our little baby who was in the Corner is now 11 years old. But Melissa is in a full on relationship with Wendy. Like, what if that happens in her office?

[Bert (Main Host)]

What are you getting at?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

What if he has just gunned it out? I would be interested to hear from people who have. You can't be the victim of it because we'll never hear the whole story. You have to have just decided, I want them fired, I want them broken up. I Want the marriage ended. I want them the vacation ruined. I want them out of the apartment. And you just made it happen.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I'm not sure what you're asking for. So you're not asking for the victim here?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

No, it has to be the plotter she's asking.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Sorry. He's asking for like the guy in the office that's.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

You've just decided. I've decided I want you fired, Bert.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And there's really just no reason. You just don't like.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

I just don't like you.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I just don't like you.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

And you have to do soap opera crap, man. You gotta swap his urine during the drug test.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Well, Joanna could give us one of these that are. It's not office related, but it's one that happened in her life also.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Really?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Uh huh.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Our Joanna.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Our Joanna.

[K (Caller)]

Oh, neat.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yeah. Now it's not office related. It has to do with a wedding.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Now I think that still qualifies.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah. It doesn't have to be work, so

[Bert (Main Host)]

she could start it off with something like that, but it has to be soap opera. Conniving as we should have.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

I want soap opera drama. I want Young and the Restless. I want Housewife watching it at 2 in the afternoon.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

So what's the last thing we tell Tammy, though?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah, sorry, you're screwed.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yeah, we just don't have enough details. This is way more entertaining.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah, yours is boring. We found another direction. Where's Joanna?

[Bert (Main Host)]

404741Q100. You have to be the one that did the plot. I mean, you have to be the conniver. And there might not have even been a reason why you decided to do what you did, but you either ruined the wedding, you got somebody fired, manipulated a situation so badly that. And it actually worked. Because I think in three fourths of these cases, you're like, oh, it's never gonna work.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yep, evicted.

[Bert (Main Host)]

But then it did the Birch show.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

Okay, can we talk about how confusing weight loss has become? Like, one minute it's carbs are bad, and then the next it's no, actually, carbs are fine, but only if you walk 10,000 steps and drink a green juice. And honestly, it's just a lot. And then even if you do lose the weight, keeping it off is a whole different story. If you're struggling and want something that fits your real life, hers can help. It's designed to support you in reaching your goals in a way that actually fits your life. That's why weight loss by hers is getting so much attention right now. Hers connects you with licensed medical providers who create doctor developed treatment plans tailored to you. They offer access to an affordable range of FDA approved GLP1 medications including the Wegovy Pill and the Wegovy Pen. It helps regulate your appetite so you eat less and keep the weight off. If you're ready to reach your goals and want to try something new, visit fourhers.com Bert to get purchased personalized affordable care that gets you that's F O-R-H-E-R-S.com Bert borhers.com Bert waylist by hers is not available in all 50 states. We'll go these registered trademark of Novo Nordisk A slash S get started and learn more including important safety information with Gobi clinical study information and restrictions. Visit borheart.com out here, if you're doing

[Bert (Main Host)]

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[Radio Host - Ad Read]

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[L (Caller or Guest)]

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[Bert (Main Host)]

The Birch Show Jeff has asked a question this morning because we had a Birchall listener on a couple of minutes ago that said that there's some weirdness going on in her office right now with a guy that's spreading a whole bunch of rumors about her. And she claims that she has some inside information about this guy, but they've never had a confrontation about it. So she's not exactly sure why he has it out for her. But for our purposes, we're just assuming. Let's say you're in the office and somebody just has it out for you for no reason. Jeff's question was he Wanted to hear from those people that have sabotaged you either in at work or in your personal life. Somehow some way made your life a living hell and did really calculating things, really nasty things that you'd like see in a soap opera.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Yeah, we'd like to talk to the saboteurs.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah, we gotta go soap opera style because we got a couple calls with people saying, well, I had one co worker and he forgot to call in a client. So I told the boss, that doesn't count. That's easy.

[Bert (Main Host)]

We didn't have to look far for this because producer Joanna came running in.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

But this wasn't about me. I'm not the saboteur. I have a friend of mine who's getting married in May. And she's gonna have this beautiful wedding at West Point. Cause that's where her fiance graduated college from. And she had her dream wedding all set up. She had the reception and the ceremony all reserved, the deposits down, everything was good to go. And one day she gets a refund on her credit card for $500, which was part of the deposit on the reception hall. And she calls the place and she's like, why is there a refund on my reception? And they said, oh, you called and canceled. She goes, I never called and canceled. And she goes, yeah, you called and canceled a couple weeks ago. You canceled your reception. And we've already booked it. We booked another wedding in that place. Well, come to find out, her. Her fiance's ex girlfriend called this place pretending to be her and canceled her reception.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Unbelievable.

[Bert (Main Host)]

How'd she find out it was the ex girlfriend?

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Well, it was from a friend of a friend. She told someone who told someone.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Because you have to sort of brag about it to somebody. Oh, you're never gonna believe what I did.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Yeah, you can't exactly.

[Bert (Main Host)]

You would think there'd be some cross check there, like they would ask, okay, what's the credit card number that's on file? Never asked any of that.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

No, I mean, she has a very unique name, so I'm sure. I don't know, I think it has something to do. She has a really strange name. Yeah, so I'm guess like anyone. How many people with that name? I don't know. So that's weird.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

That is evil.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That's the level of mean we're looking for right there. Hey, Joe, good morning. You're on Q100.

[G (Caller or Guest)]

Hey, good morning, guys. I have a story from you. I used to play professional hockey in Canada and we have this guy that it was complete jerk. He used to steal from us. And you see, I don't know. Didn't no one like this guy. He did a lot of horrible things. Even try to get our wives, you know, in bed and all that. We want to kick them off the team. And only me and another teammate knew about it. We just decided we were playing from St. John's Canada to the United States, another team across the border. We stuck some cocaine on his back.

[M (Caller or Guest)]

Oh, no.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So he got caught at the border with all that?

[G (Caller or Guest)]

Yeah, it's actually. It didn't cut.

[Boss Man]

It didn't.

[G (Caller or Guest)]

Didn't get caught. Coming from Canada to the U.S. he actually got caught on the way back. This is back in the 90s, before the 9 11. So the borders weren't that strict, but it took two times for him to get caught.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

How about the fact that with the first time he went over, you and your buddy who threw the cocaine in his bag were sitting in the bus going, all right, here we go, here we go, here we go. And then they're like,

[G (Caller or Guest)]

we were just hoping for that moment to happen. That's the only way to get rid of him. Because we talked to the coach, the manager, many stole a lot of money from. Used to go in the locker room and take money of our wallets, even in our cars, sometimes within lock. And the manager said, well, he's under contract. We can't trade him. We can't get rid of him. We just had to wait, you know?

[Bert (Main Host)]

And most of those contracts have, like. Like a clause in it that says if you do anything really bad or illegal, then they can get out of their contract.

[G (Caller or Guest)]

Exactly. So he got. He got arrested, first of all, and he got released then.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Nicely done.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Wow.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Total sabotage.

[Boss Man]

Major.

[G (Caller or Guest)]

But it was. I mean, it was. It was really a bad apple anyway.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So you don't really feel bad about it even to this day, do you?

[G (Caller or Guest)]

Oh, nobody knows. Maybe me and my buddy, and that's about it. I mean, it was in the papers, but the guy had a reputation of being a rowdy guy, so, I mean, it wasn't a surprise.

[Boss Man]

Okay.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Thanks, Joe.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Appreciate it, man.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Wow.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Good morning, Lisa. You were on the voice disguiser. Hi.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Hi.

[K (Caller)]

Good morning.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Good morning.

[M (Caller or Guest)]

Okay, so I was working with this girl that she came in for an interview, and I just hated her from the beginning. And they finally hired her, and I never understood why. And since I didn't like her, I decided I was gonna make her life not so pleasant at work. And she'd always bring snacks in to eat. She was constantly eating. So I took it upon myself to constantly throw him out. I made her look horrible in front of the boss. She would invite her about when she was supposed to be in for her shift and make her late so that the boss would know and have to call her and tell her to get in.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

So you would light it. So she would call you and go, what time do I have to be in? And you would say 10 o' clock when it really said nine on the schedule.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Yep.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

That's messed up.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That's awes. End up getting the ax over it.

[M (Caller or Guest)]

Not over that. But the boss chose me over her. So she didn't appreciate that.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

So she quit for a promotion or something?

[M (Caller or Guest)]

No, I had given my boss an ultimatum and they chose me and she found out about it. So she wasn't too happy that they liked me, even though I kind of didn't make her life so happy here.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So it does happen. Yes, it does happen.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I mean, if you feels good about

[Bert (Main Host)]

it and you hear about stuff like that all the time at, like, pageants, how they're jacking with these, Jacking with each other at Passions and stuff like that, but never on the day to day. I'm so stoked we took the hockey call.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

That's awesome. Crazy. And he justifies that all the way home.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That is one that I will take as my own story and pass that on to a friend as though it happened to me. You're on the Burt show. And maybe guys can call up and tell me if I'm normal here, because I don't think this is one that women can understand.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Okay. All right.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I'm not sure that I understand it either, but I'll be honest with you. So I had two doctor's appointments yesterday, and I almost hate talking about them because, man, they just make me sound so old. I got two old persons injuries right now.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Well, I think that. Well, I just think when men go to the doctor and they do checkups or whatever, I mean, I think it takes a lot to get a guy to go to the doctor. You know what I mean?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Well, I'm taking some comfort in the fact that the two injuries I got were sports related. I had to go get the MRI for the right knee yesterday. And then I was lifting in the gym like a year ago, too heavy, and I knew it, but I went for it anyway. And I gave myself a hernia. So I got this nice little lump now.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Right?

[Bert (Main Host)]

I know it sounds sexy and all, but it's not. So I decided yesterday to go get that checked out. My idea here was if I did have a hernia, and I do have as messed up a leg as I think I have to do both surgeries in the same day. So I got the consults yesterday, and Stacy wanted to go with me yesterday, especially to the hernia one, because when there's any kind of surgery, she wants to be in on the consult because she wants to know exactly what she's going to have to do and how she's going to have to prepare. And so she likes to go to those consults. So I was reluctant to have her go yesterday because I knew this.

[Boss Man]

It.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I just don't like her in the same doctor's office when I'm getting my junk checked. And that's really what it boils down to.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I can see that.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So awkward, you know, and she's seen my junk quite a bit for how long? We've been married for 13 years and known each other for 16. So she's pretty. She's pretty.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Burt.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Junk educated.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

She's familiar with the area.

[Bert (Main Host)]

She is.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

So.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And we're in this very clinical. Medically, you know, it's a medical, you know, surroundings. So, like, there shouldn't be anything awkward about it. But, man, when that doctor walked in yesterday and Stacy's in the consult room, and he asked me to, like, to pull everything down, and he starts, like, fondling with my junk and stuff like that, I was really uncomfortable watching my wife have another dude handle my junk.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah, I can see that. That's awkward.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And she said, I don't know why you're being so homophobic about it. And I said to her, it has nothing to do with, like, I think all of a sudden the doctor is gonna start hooking me up. It has nothing to do with that at all. But there's something about being. Having another. Now, if it was a female doctor, I don't think it would have bothered

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

me, really, any doctor, because I would think.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I don't know, that it would have bothered me as much. I don't think so. Maybe there is some homophobia going on there. I don't know. But I know it was awkward to have a dude handling my junk with my wife right next to me.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I understand that it's an awkward situation,

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

but I've never had a guest in my gynecological appointment before.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

And that's why I'm always so amazed at how women who deliver babies have other people in there other than their husband or that they let their husband, like, down at that end of the.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That's what Stacey's point was yesterday also is like, you have been in the room when I've had two children.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Right.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I mean, I've held her leg, I've cut the cord. I've seen our baby's heads crown out of that area.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So she's like, so how could you possibly be insecure about me looking at somebody else touch your junk in a medical setting?

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

And you're like, I'm the vulnerable in this one. You know, I mean, like, because it's, you know, that's vulnerable.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

That's probably what it is. I think you're right. You hit the nail on the head.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Maybe so. But yeah, that's how it all went down yesterday. And I'm still as uncomfortable talking about it today as I was yesterday. Listen, it's the virt show.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

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[Bert (Main Host)]

Visit borehurst.com the Birch Show Good morning Amanda. You are on the Birch Show.

[K (Caller)]

Hi morning Bird Show Good morning. Wanted to talk to you Bert. I found in a magazine yesterday I've been listening to your streak of bad luck and I found in a magazine, Atlanta Life magazine, the name of a guy who gives fishing lessons and he said he had a record of catching a 1649 pound marlin off of Hawaii.

[Bert (Main Host)]

This, this Became really chic yesterday after I told the story that I'm just. I just have really bad mojo when it comes to fishing. I've taken like 10 or 15 deep sea fishing trips in some of the sports fishing capitals of the world. Venezuela, Cabo San Lucas. I've already been to Costa Rica and got skunked there. Hawaii. And I never come back with a marlin, which is what I've always wanted to do. And it became really chic yesterday in email, which I thought was funny to relay your first time success fishing stories to me the same way Jeff did.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Yeah. Why would you do that? It was sad for you, Bert, but I caught my 1600 pound marlin.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

I did not intend to make it come across that way. What I was doing, I think you did is. I was. I was what? I don't really know why I would do that.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Didn't you catch like a marlin the very first time you ever went out fishing? Like, and it was in a lake?

[L (Caller or Guest)]

No, it wasn't.

[Bert (Main Host)]

It wasn't like a lake.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

It wasn't the first time. But I was like. I was like 12 years old. I think what I was doing is confirming, remember Bert said a lot what happens when you marlin fish. A lot of other people do the work. So in order to support that theory, I was going to mention he's gonna relay it again that the rod that was assigned to me at 12 snagged a marlin at what age? When I was like 12 or 13 years old in the Florida Keys where Bert just got back from and got stuck again.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

Had to rub it in.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

And so I was.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

And you're like, I don't want to be bothered by having to bring this marlin in. That's not even what I wanted to do.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Well, I didn't really have to do anything. It was just the pole that was assigned to me and.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And they did all the work.

[K (Caller)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Wow, that must have been great. Amanda, I would love to see the article. Anything would help because I'm going to Costa Rica in a couple of weeks and I will catch that damn fish.

[K (Caller)]

Awesome. I think it's Atlanta Life magazine, so check it out. Okay.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Okay, thank you. Somebody called in if you weren't listening late, and you're a fisherman that apparently eating bananas or having bananas anywhere near the boat before you go on it is considered really bad luck.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I was fascinated by that.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

In a fisherman's world, that is so strange.

[Bert (Main Host)]

But these stories coming in yesterday were like, the very first time I went out, I fought with a marlin for six hours. It was one of the greatest days of my life. Somebody else emailed me yesterday. I caught a 250 pound Mako the very first time off of the Keys. That's jacked up.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

One of my friends called me yesterday and said that your fishermen were like doing the hooks wrong because especially if you're bottom feeding, if the bottom feeders can see the hooks then they won't bite or something. All kinds of.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That's really sweet, but 20 times Marlin

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

doesn't live on the bottom.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yeah, some people have the mojo and others don't. And I am just cursed, jinxed when it comes to fishing.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

No more bananas.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

For what it's worth, I did say with the banana thing. I did send that to my dad because when he comes to visit and we're up at the lake in South

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Carolina, you catch a marlin every time.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah, we catch a marlin in the

[Bert (Main Host)]

lake, he goes in the creek, in the pond behind our house.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

When it rains real hard, he goes.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

He goes fishing and has never really caught anything of merit. And so I sent him the banana theory because for whatever reason up at the lake those little dried banana chip things are a snack of choice. Like they're always around the house. And so I said, hey, maybe that's the problem. Like we gotta get those out of the house. So no banana chips in the house this summer. And he wrote back three words. That's so stupid.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Somebody emailed me a train. Obviously has been listening and knows my story. Streak of rooting for teams that end up losing also in the championship and tied the two together and said that I need to root for the fish to actually not get caught. And then we'll get caught. We're living in an opposite world now.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

That didn't work for the J. Utah

[Bert (Main Host)]

Jen hobby should be very proud of herself. Seven days now, not smoking.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah, this is for you. This is a full week today. So today by 11:30 will be a full week. So I can't quite count it as a full week yet.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Not that you're counting or anything.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Not that I'm counting or anything.

[Bert (Main Host)]

But for those of you that don't know, Jen got hypnotized a week ago to stop smoking. And it has caught.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

It has worked.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yeah.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I mean it's also taken a lot of personal effort too. It's not like just like a pill you take or a light switch that goes off. But it really helped me mentally change my mind about it and just sort of gave me those kind of mental tools to get through some of the cravings, because I still have cravings, and for the first several days, it was a lot of withdrawal. I think I told you I was having pretty bad headaches, which is normal. And then I was so thirsty, and I still even feel that way. Even now, I'm just constantly thirsty, and I can't figure out what that is or what withdrawal symptom that is. But I am drinking water. It is going out of style. And I still feel thirsty and dehydrated, so I don't know what that's about.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I wonder if your body's just trying to push out the nicotine and still push out all the drugs that really are associated with it.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I don't know, but I did. I have started noticing because people often will ask you, when you stop smoking, like, do you feel better right away? And most of the time, no, you feel kind of worse right away, actually. But this week, what's today? Wednesday? Yeah. Yesterday morning and Monday morning. Waking up in the morning, I felt so much better than I ever did when I was smoking.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

That's great.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah. Because when you smoke, even if you don't smoke a lot, you wake up in the morning and you can taste it for some reason in the middle of the night. It likes, even if you brush your teeth, do your Listerine, whatever, like, seeps back up through your system or something. It's like this septic tank, like, it rises to the top and you taste it in the morning when you wake up sexy. And you can, like, feel it. You can, like, feel it. But you get so used to that, that that's just the way that you wake up. And now that I have, like, sort of this comparison difference, like, I wake up like, oh, wow, I don't have that taste in my mouth. Oh, wow. I don't feel really gross. I don't feel like.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Do you wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

No, actually, I don't have a Maybach parked outside, so, no, I don't feel like that, but I definitely feel better. And so that's more encouragement to keep it going.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So I'm curious what he said. What has been the difference between you not smoking now and the failed tries before? Did he trigger something that when you're thinking of the cigarette, you think of something else?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah, there was definitely some visual practices there, one of which where you really visualize, like, sort of this perfect picture of your best self, and that's transposed with a picture of you smoking. And so you kind of switch those pictures in your Mind. It's interesting how he does it. And I can't really explain how he does it, but for whatever reason, that picture of that really healthy person that I would like to see myself as, it keeps coming into my mind. If I ever think about wanting to have a cigarette, I'm like, okay, I'm not gonna get to that picture if I keep smoking.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

So it just happens.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

It can be a much uglier picture.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

So it just happens during cravings that

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

you get the visuals or just constantly. It's kind of like those mental exercises to rely on. There's other, like, breathing techniques when you're supposed to, like, see a word. Like, they suggest, like, calm. My word was like, peace. And you really, like, visualize that word when you're doing this, like, sort of breathing technique. And that's supposed to help you get through the craving. So I've been relying on that. And then I just keep telling myself, like, whenever I have a craving or whenever I. It's funny how when you smoke and you're so used to it, you anticipate things being hard even when they don't exist. Right. Like last night I went to a girls night supper club that my friends and I have once a month, and there's a couple girls in that group that will socially smoke. So I thought, God, that's gonna be hard when I get there and somebody offers me a cigarette. And then I'm stressing out about a situation that isn't even in existence.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And did it occur?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

No, it didn't occur. It never even came up. But if it does come up, or if it thinks, you know, my thing that I rely on, I think I talked about this on the air the other day, is in my mind. I just go, but that's okay, because I just don't smoke anymore. I have a craving right now. But that's okay because I just don't smoke anymore. Or this may be a potentially difficult situation, but that's okay. And I'll be okay because I just don't smoke anymore. And I know that's weird and it sounds mind trippy, but the whole thing is a mind trip.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And keep the mindset.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

The whole addiction is a mind trip.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

But that's cool, though. I mean, like, that. That's what hypnosis is all about, is changing the program. Rewiring your brain is what you're doing. And it worked. It's cool.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And I want to remind people that we're not getting paid by this Shaun Wheeler dude at all. I mean, this is not A commercial or anything. This is just something that's worked for Jen. And if you're smoking and you're really serious about it, you might want to give the dude a call.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

May want to try it.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, Melissa, good morning. You're on Q100.

[K (Caller)]

Good morning. How are y'? All?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Good, thank you.

[K (Caller)]

I was just wondering, Jen, have you drank any alcohol since you quit smoking?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I have, yeah.

[K (Caller)]

And was it hard then? Cause that was something I struggled with a lot.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

For whatever reason, it hasn't been. I went. I haven't been drinking a lot over the weekend. I went to the North Georgia wineries and did some wine tasting and didn't have a problem there. But I wasn't with anybody who smoked. There was no temptation because there was no cigarettes there. There was nobody saying, hey, do you want one right now? You know what I mean? Yeah.

[K (Caller)]

Yeah. I quit smoking with. Well, I quit smoking. My husband didn't. And now it's been two years. And I'm trying to get him to quit. So I've actually mentioned to him and what you've done. But that's gonna be one of his struggles. Cause he normally drinks a couple beers when he gets home. And I'm like, if he's drinking, he's not gonna quit smoking.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That's really gotta be very difficult when one person in the house is trying to quit anything and the other one continues to. To do it. Like one person stopped drinking or smoking, or one person starts to eat better and the other one doesn't, that makes it really, really difficult.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

And I will tell you, if you're gonna quit, you have to get rid of everything around you. Because I have had moments in the last week that had. I had that sort of emergency pack of cigarettes in the back of the junk drawer, or, you know, the one that you can dig out of a purse that you had from two years ago, and it's in the pocket of your purse. I would have gone to get all

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

crushed and kind of wet.

[Bert (Main Host)]

You don't care. You work your way around it.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I probably would have gone to the fact that I haven't had it around me at all, and the fact that I've told everyone I know that I've stopped smoking, that that's helped support me in all of that.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Are you nervous to hang out with friends that do smoke still?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I was actually thinking about it because I have a couple of friends that are coming to this event that I'm hosting tonight, this Life and Style event. One of whom texted me about the hypnosis and wanted to know more about it. And she's coming tonight and I haven't seen her in months. I'm really excited to see her and hang out with her, but she's one of my friends that smokes, so I actually have had some anxiety about seeing her tonight, but I just keep going back to that. But that's okay because I just don't smoke at all.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Same thing as last night, though. It wasn't as hard as you thought. So tonight, maybe it'll be the same

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

thing as I'm gonna think.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Would it bother you if I told you that Stacey and I were coming tonight?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

No, I don't think so, because I would rely on that again and because Bert's wife is somebody who I love talking to, and we always go out back and smoke cigarettes together. And now I just won't go.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Are you really coming or are you jacking with him?

[Bert (Main Host)]

What's that?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Are you really coming or are you just jacking with her?

[Bert (Main Host)]

No, we're not going.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

We would still hang out and talk, and I know that we'll hang out and talk, and I know Stacy will stop when she's ready to stop. So there's gonna be no, like, you know, pressure. Like, I don't need to become some anti smoking crusader or anything like that. It's just, for me, I don't want that in my life anymore. It's such a. It was such a negative part of my life and was so embarrassed and ashamed by it. And it was one part I hated about myself.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Are you a little bit skeptical of yourself as the words are coming out of your mouth like you have? You've probably said these things before and then you've gone back smoking, so now you're saying these things about being shamed about it. Is there any part of you that thinks I shouldn't say those things because I'm. I've always gone back to cigarettes.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

I'm not afraid of failure in my life anymore. So, no, I'm not afraid to say it.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, Sally.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Good morning.

[Bert (Main Host)]

You're on Q100.

[K (Caller)]

Hey there. How are you doing?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Super. How are you?

[K (Caller)]

I'm good. I'm good. I'm just listening to you guys and, I mean, I can relate to everything y' all are saying. I mean, I've smoked for, gosh, 20 some odd, 23 years now. Tried everything. My family smoked, my friends smoke. So that's, of course, always an excuse to keep smoking. I've got four kids, though, and want to quit. I've tried everything and just wanted to find out a little bit more about Shawn Wheeler and the program. And I mean, I can relate to everything she's saying because there's. You can make up so many excuses in your head. And at this point, I'm willing to try anything.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Yeah.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

And I think, I think if you change your mind about it, you can do anything. People do amazing things in changing their life every day. This could be a small thing for you, but it could be a huge thing too. You know what I'm saying?

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Like,

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

your mind can make you do anything you want to do.

[Bert (Main Host)]

And I love that. If it doesn't work the first time, you can go back to him again. He said, like, this is a lifetime deal. I'll always be there for you.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Yep.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Not you specifically. I'm just saying for listeners that go.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

And I'm gonna go back for a follow up. I'm. I'm supposed to go back next week, so in two weeks.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, the bird show.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

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[Bert (Main Host)]

All right, so let's get the boss on here. I think we've all sort of like this is it sort of concluded, but it didn't conclude.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah, everybody's asking about this on email

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

because, I mean, the listeners picked what?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Jill?

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Is that her name?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Sally?

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Jenny.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Jenny.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I'm sorry, the listeners picked Jenny to get the raise and not Sally. And so that was the definitive answer. Like, okay. But then Sally said, you know what? I'm gonna make a stink about even that because she accused us of fixing the results in the poll. So.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So she was gonna go back to the boss and say it's not legit. Whatever, whatever, whatever. So you guys have wanted to know what's going on in the office since then. So Sally's boss is back with us, but we can't remember what fake name we assigned to him before you guys remember Boss Man.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Why don't we just call him Boss Man?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Boss man, you back, Boss Man? Yeah, you're the boss man.

[Boss Man]

That's probably it.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So you're on the voice disguiser now. And this hasn't totally concluded when Sally. Were you listening when the were discussed and Sally lost that day?

[Boss Man]

No.

[Bert (Main Host)]

So she came back into the office or Jenny came back in the office. How'd you find out who got the raise?

[Boss Man]

Oh, I guess. I mean, I don't know what the results were exactly. I mean, I could be listening. I could have been listening.

[Bert (Main Host)]

What do you mean?

[Boss Man]

It sounds like something I would have been listening. Right.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Okay.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

But I think. Yeah, I thought the agreement was that whoever, you know, won the listener vote would get the raise.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah.

[Boss Man]

Yeah.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Okay. And you don't know what the results are yet?

[Boss Man]

Well, I don't know. I didn't know how. What? The landslide or how much of a landslide it was. I know that Jenny got it.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Okay.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

Okay.

[Radio Host - Ad Read]

So you just.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

You don't have exact numbers.

[Boss Man]

Right? Right.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Okay. So when Sally comes into the office that morning, does she tell you who won or does Jenny call you first or how do you find out?

[Boss Man]

Um, I could be listening to the radio. I mean, I guess. I guess. I mean, I don't know.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I'm so confused.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Are you drunk?

[M (Caller or Guest)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

What are you talking about? What has got into you?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Are you hungover?

[Boss Man]

No, I just.

[Bert (Main Host)]

It's a pretty simple question.

[Boss Man]

It's your guys evil plan.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Huh?

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

What?

[Boss Man]

It's your evil plan.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Evil plan for what?

[Boss Man]

Yeah, Genie called me. Jeannie called me right away to brag.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

So you weren't listening the morning we announced the results, but you got a phone call from Ginny right afterwards and said that you won. Okay.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

So did you give Ginny the raise?

[Boss Man]

Yes.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

And is Sally still work there?

[Boss Man]

Sally still works there.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Okay, so what has the Atmosphere been like in the office since this whole thing went down.

[Boss Man]

Sally is less than pleased. But it was such a trip for everyone to be on the radio that she can't really act like a sourpuss.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

It was a trip for everybody to be on the radio so she can't act like a what?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Sour puss.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Sour puss.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Sour puss.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Sour puss.

[Boss Man]

Yeah, yeah, she's taking it. She's taking it. Okay. She obviously makes sure she got the money.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Is there any tension between her and Jenny now?

[Boss Man]

A little. There's probably a little tension between Sally and everyone. Sally wish she got some money.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Have there been any repercussions for you? Like has your boss found out how this all went down?

[Boss Man]

He did, but he doesn't mind. He thought it was kind of fun.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Something doesn't smell right to me. Like you sound so strange today. Like I'm wondering if you got pressure from in the office, like this was unprofessional to do because you don't sound like the same dude.

[Boss Man]

No, I think. I mean, what's happening right now? You're not recording this, are you?

[Bert (Main Host)]

No, we're on the air right now.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

You tell us what's happening right now.

[Bert (Main Host)]

We're on the air.

[Boss Man]

No. Yeah, I haven't gotten any like negative repercussions. Like my job isn't being threatened.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Is someone's job being threatened?

[Boss Man]

No, no, no, no.

[G (Caller or Guest)]

It was.

[Boss Man]

No one's job was being threatened. Judy got the raise and I would say that Sally deserved it more, honestly, if we were being honest and if I had to. Had to have chosen it myself. But

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

is there something you can't say on the air right now?

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yeah, we're just going to bail because there's a. Something not right.

[I (Producer Joanna)]

Yeah.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Is Sally there with you?

[L (Caller or Guest)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I mean everybody's calling up pretty much saying the same thing now that they said the last time we had this guy on.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That they all should be fired.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Yeah.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Weird.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Including the boss now. Before it was just Ginny and Sally. Now they're lumping the boss in there.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

He doesn't sound like much of a boss.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, Sherry. Good morning.

[K (Caller)]

Hey, good morning guys. How are you?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Good.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Confused.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Yeah, weird because he's gone now also.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Well, he.

[K (Caller)]

I mean, is he crazy or what? He says this is Yalls evil plan.

[Tammy (HR Person)]

It was his idea.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yeah, exactly.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

It's weird, you know, Very weird.

[K (Caller)]

And he sounds so wishy washy. Doesn't sound like he's got any. You know what I mean? You know, he came on and told all of Atlanta and everybody else, you know, whoever got the most votes would get the raise. And then he says, am I being recorded? It's like you're on the radio.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I'm curious. I wonder if, like, he got some pressure from his boss and like, wasn't supposed to come on or something like that and did Tracy, like, strong arm him to come on?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

I don't think so.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Well, and then, of course. And then he throws out how he thought that Sally. Is that her name? Sally House? I don't know. I can't remember names today. Sally deserved the raise more so that. That only is going to add fuel to the fire, you know. Way to go, dude.

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Bizarre.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, Tori.

[K (Caller)]

Hey, good morning. Not sure this is a legit company. It sounds like they may be trying to pull one over on you guys.

[Bert (Main Host)]

That could be. It could be.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Maybe.

[K (Caller)]

Yeah. I think they just wanted to be radio famous, maybe.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Radio famous. That's so overrated.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Didn't get you very far a couple weeks ago, did it?

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

I'm leaving for TV.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, Kim. Good morning. You're on Q100.

[K (Caller)]

Hello.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Hey,

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

what's going on?

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

Yeah, Wow.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I just want to leave now.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Take me to my safe place.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Can we end the show at 7:45 under the covers?

[J (Co-host, possibly named Jen or Jim)]

Yes.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Maybe Brittany will come in early today.

[Bert (Main Host)]

Hey, Michelle. Good morning.

[K (Caller)]

Hey, guys. I wish I would just cut him off. He sounds like such a tool. Between the slurred words and the heavy breathing. It's kind of creepy.

[G (Caller or Guest)]

Yeah.

[Bert (Main Host)]

None of it sounded right today. Like me. I'm starting to think the same thing that that other caller said, that maybe we were all. Maybe they're snowing us off for the whole last couple.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I would not want to work for him.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

God, I don't think it's. I think it's just a small, tiny backwards company. And the guy doesn't. He's not a boss. He's a yes man for somebody else. And he probably. I'm guessing he got in trouble, but you know, from the. From his boss for coming on with us and. But he still wanted to be on the radio.

[Bert (Main Host)]

I'm so not satisfied with the conclusion of that.

[H (Co-host, possibly named Heather or Hank)]

I don't want to talk to them anymore.

[Bert (Main Host)]

No, that's it.

[F (Co-host, possibly named Frank or Fred)]

Get it.

[Bert (Main Host)]

The bird show.