Full Show PT 2: Friday, February 6 [Vault]

Summary

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The Bert Show – Full Show PT 2: Friday, February 6 [Vault]

Podcast: The Bert Show by Pionaire Podcasting
Episode Date: February 6, 2026
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and more

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Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show delivers an engaging blend of office drama, listener stories, and relationship challenges—all laced with the hosts’ signature humor and authenticity. The central discussions revolve around workplace dynamics, particularly the concept of authenticity versus superficial courtesy, a listener’s tech-related family secret, and updates from a traveling couple. True to the show's character, candid insights, memorable banter, and entertaining speculation pepper the conversations.

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Segment 1: Authenticity vs. Office Politeness

(00:00 – 14:26)

Key Discussion Points

• Introspective Honesty:
  Bert opens up about focusing on living a more authentic life, minimizing “BS and more honesty” in both personal and professional interactions. This sets the stage for a debate on authenticity in workplace relationships.
  Quote – Bert (00:43):
  “My wife Stacy and I are really going through trying to be more authentic with people … less BS and more honesty.”

• The Office “Silent Treatment”:
  The team discusses the longstanding issue of certain ex-interns—now building colleagues—who refuse to acknowledge The Bert Show crew, not out of overt animosity, but total indifference.

• Debating Rudeness vs. Authenticity:
  Is being blatantly uninterested more respectable than two-faced friendliness? Bert finds "almost respect" in their honesty, prompting a complex ethical conversation. Quote – Bert (03:09):
  "What I like about this is you know, right off the bat, they don't like you at all … I really sort of appreciate it."

• Emotional Energy & Boundaries:
  Cassie argues ignoring people in the hall is about holding onto negative energy, urging to “let it go.” Quote – Cassie (04:40):
  “Why do they want to hold on to some sort of anger, hold on to some sort of angst about us or whatever?”

• Professional Consequences:
  Melissa points out that burning bridges in media is shortsighted: “In this industry, you never know where you’re gonna end up ... I will never, ever do anything to help that woman out.” (05:30).

• Embracing or Ignoring “Negative Energy”:
  Bert admits he’s stopped caring, seeing it almost as freedom: “I couldn't care less now. But I do respect the fact that they are telling me without telling me, I hate you.” (05:52)

Listener Calls & Broader Context

• Laverne (07:08): Shares her struggle to ignore negativity at work, ultimately recommitting to her authentic approach: “It took so much energy to ignore the person back that I finally decided I wasn’t that person. I’m going to say hi …”
• Ben (10:53): A 12-year-old listener affirms the honesty angle: "At least they're honest and upfront with you." (10:59).
• Annetta’s Story: The team revisits a viral on-air resignation from Alabama DJ Annetta (“I quit this bitch!”) as a dramatic example of refusing workplace fakery.
  Quote – Annetta (13:22):
  “I refuse to walk around and watch people on my job looking over my shoulder … I quit this bitch.”

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Segment 2: Listeners Abroad – Brian & Mandy’s World Trip

(14:26 – 23:03)

Key Discussion Points

• Check-In from Indonesia:
  Brian and Mandy, a couple traveling the world for 18 months, share their early culture shock, adjusting to local customs, and how travel is testing their relationship dynamics. Quote – Brian (15:53):
  “The realization for us was when we took the ferry to Indonesia … but it’s like another planet.”

• Managing Stress as a Couple:
  Both admit early tensions from jet lag, fatigue, and language barriers—plus juggling roles like navigation and organizing passports.

• Playful Observations:
  Kristin notes how you can spot couples arguing on vacation by “one walking briskly in front of the other … pretending nobody’s noticing.” (17:50)

• Atmosphere and Culture in Indonesia:
  Mandy paints a vivid picture of their mountain town, the humidity (“shockingly hot”), lush scenery, and mosque-spotted rooftops.

• Relationship Dynamics and Growth:
  The team speculates light-heartedly about whether the couple will develop “control issues” through travel—“I think they’re going to have control issues on this trip a little bit.” (23:30)

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Segment 3: The Mystery of the “Deleted” Computer Photos

(24:13 – 36:54)

Key Discussion Points

• Recap of the “Photos on the Husband’s Computer” Saga:
  The cast recounts a prior bit—a listener named Emily asked for technical help finding and deleting mysterious files, promising to report back what she found. Quote – Bert (25:25):
  “She’s not savvy enough to know how to get to pictures on her computer, so she called us … The agreement we made was, if we’re gonna do this, you gotta tell us exactly what’s coming down as it’s coming down.”

• Unexpected Twist:
  Emily’s husband, Chris (using a disguised voice), calls in to reveal SHE was the one hiding something, not him. Emily sought help erasing her own tracks—possibly incriminating photos or sites—rather than investigating his secrets.
  Quote – Chris (26:44):
  “She was trying to figure out how to erase things permanently that she was up to. And that’s really, at this point, all I’m willing to tell you guys.”

• The Hosts' Frustration and Speculation:
  The team is both amused and annoyed by the “double-cross,” and—lacking closure—begin to wildly speculate (personal photos? affair? pornography? Something darker?).
  Quote – Bert (29:10):
  “Well, now we gotta speculate exactly what she must have been trying to erase off the computer.”

• Callers Speculate and React:

  • Simone (30:11): Calls “BS” on Chris’ story, suggesting if Emily really wanted to delete things, she’d have stayed on with Jeff.
  • Tanya (30:45): Points out the performance in Emily’s “shocked” reaction.
  • Sam (32:52): Offers a far darker speculation, which the group quickly dismisses as unlikely.

• Ethics of On-Air Agreements:
  Debate arises on whether they can just out the couple’s identity now that closure is impossible. Cassie reminds that breaking listener trust could be disastrous for the show’s reputation. Quote – Cassie (36:00):
  “Don’t give out the names because no future callers will ever call in if we breach that trust.”

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Highlighted Quotes and Memorable Moments

• Bert on Office Authenticity (03:09):
  “I love it. I love being hated.”
• Melissa on Networking Consequences (05:30):
  “There’s a guarantee that I will never, ever do anything to help that woman out.”
• Brian on Culture Shock (15:53):
  “It was like going from New York City to somewhere in rural Guatemala or something like that.”
• Annetta’s Legendary Resignation (13:46):
  “If you’re confused about what I’m saying, listen very carefully. I quit this bitch.”
• Kristin on Couples Fighting While Traveling (17:50):
  “If they are not getting along, one is walking briskly in front of the other while the other one is trying to catch up, pretending that nobody’s noticing.”
• Chris on The Computer File Saga (26:44):
  “She was trying to figure out how to erase things permanently that she was up to ... that’s really, at this point, all I’m willing to tell you guys.”
• Cassie on Listener Trust (36:00):
  “No future callers will ever call in if we breach that trust. And I agree with that.”

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Notable Timestamps

• 00:00-05:52: In-depth discussion about authenticity, social courtesies, and professional grudges.
• 07:08: Laverne’s call about “energy to ignore.”
• 13:16: On-air playback of Annetta’s dramatic quitting moment.
• 14:26-23:03: Live update with Brian and Mandy from Indonesia.
• 24:13-36:06: The mystery of the computer photos; Chris (voice disguised) joins, followed by listener speculation.
• 36:00: Final thoughts on balancing entertainment and privacy for listeners.

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Summary & Takeaways

This episode of The Bert Show humorously navigates the thin line between faux courtesy and radical honesty in workplace relationships, highlights how negativity can be both freeing and isolating, and demonstrates the complexities of transparency on air, as seen with the unresolved “computer photo” saga. Listener interactions amplify the authenticity, showing real-world resonance with the dilemmas discussed by the cast.

At its heart, the show continues to deliver the relatable chaos, emotional honesty, and behind-the-scenes peeks that have made it a mainstay for morning radio fans.

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Transcript

[A]

The Bird show. So Melissa and I were talking this morning, and it's an interesting situation that's been going on at this radio station for a long time now. But before I get into it, let me tell you what my mindset is. Going into it. Do you guys ever go through stages in your life where you work on just one part of, like, something that you see you feel is a deficiency in your life, so you spend a lot of time working on that thing rather than a whole bunch of things that you think might be wrong with you?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Sometimes you focus on one specific thing.

[B]

I don't do it for long periods of time, but I'll do it like. Like, I'll get to the end of the day, and I'll be like, are you kidding me? I spent the entire day cleaning my office. And then I look at my checklist of stuff I wanted to do, and I'm like, and I got 15 things I have to do by tomorrow. And I got sucked up reorganizing the file cabinet.

[A]

Yeah, this is a little different than that. I'm talking about a personality thing that you want to change about yourself. And my wife Stacy and I are going through this period right now where we are really going through trying to be more authentic with people. Like, just. You and I talked about this the other day, too, Jen. Just kind of, like, less BS and more honesty. I mean, you don't have to be mean about it, but just to live your life a little bit more authentically. I appreciate that. So we've got a couple of interns that have worked, not at our radio station, but have worked in the building now and have actually, I think, been promoted now to producers that refuse to acknowledge people on the Burt show or on Q100.

[B]

They.

[A]

They don't like us, and they have their personal reasons. One used to intern for us. Didn't have a great experience.

[C]

Yeah, that was a long time ago.

[A]

Long time ago. Blogged about it. And she just doesn't like us. And there's another guy on that side of the building also, that for reasons that are way too complicated to get into now, certainly has reasons why he wouldn't like me. Right.

[B]

He spoke to you yesterday?

[A]

Well, he had to tell me that I had to go over to the other studio, and I was like, wow. I know, right?

[B]

That must have really thrown him.

[A]

But here's the strange thing. Like, they won't acknowledge anybody in their presence from this show.

[D]

I mean, acknowledge. Yeah, go ahead. No, yeah. I. And I came in the studio this morning because I Just don't understand it. I don't understand. Just a nod. Just a nod. Or if someone. And here's the thing, if someone acknowledges you, to acknowledge back. That's the thing is like it's not just a fact of not acknowledging. You can say hello and they will not even look at you. They'll just keep going past you.

[A]

I mean, it's like you're not even in the room. If you're in the lunchroom with a break room or whatever, they will work right around you. They're not. They don't say anything nasty. They just. It's like you're a ghost. You're not even there. Not a. Not even a look at the eye.

[B]

Cuban hundred does not exist.

[A]

It doesn't even exist in any of.

[D]

Them to even look at you in the eye. And so I just made the mistake because I came around the corner in the hall and she came by and I think I smiled or nodded or something. Nothing. And I came in. And that was right before I walked in the door, before we did the news. And I told Bert, I don't understand. Understand not acknowledging at all. I don't understand that behavior because it is so incredibly rude. So incredibly rude.

[A]

I have a different take on it and it is.

[D]

I've experienced it for as long as we've been here, but it's just. I cannot understand it.

[A]

And I have a ton of comical. I don't think it's comical. I almost respect it.

[C]

Why?

[A]

Because like, they had some sort of.

[C]

Pinky swear that they weren't going to talk to us.

[A]

That's not it. How many times have you heard before that somebody is really nice to your face and then you hear later on that they just don't like you or they've been talking crap about you? What I like about this is that, you know, right off the bat, they don't like you at all. There's zero reason for them to say hello or put on any kind of face or pretension. They are letting you know right now, I hate you. I don't want to acknowledge you. This is where we stand. And I really sort of appreciate it.

[B]

Now that you say it.

[D]

I have respect for it.

[B]

I think I do too. I think that's why I find it funny because there are so many people that we encounter on a daily basis who, if I could reflect upon the moodsetta, will totally to your face be so nice. And the minute you walk around the corner, be like, it's all together now, duh, bitch.

[D]

But we're good.

[A]

For it.

[D]

But don't we do the same thing, though?

[A]

Yes.

[D]

I mean, we are. I mean, we're not hypocrites. We do the same thing. But I just. I just don't. Saying hello in the hallway to me is not compromising your values and compromising yourself. And I told Bert, I said, well, I hope I would never hire them. I would never hire them, so they.

[A]

Never need to join us. Why acknowledge somebody that you don't like and you don't want anything to do with? Why put on the face of the potential?

[D]

That's just a little bratty. That's just being a little brat.

[B]

Right.

[C]

To me, what it is, is it's just they are holding onto some sort of anger. And to me, it's like, just negative energy.

[B]

Sure.

[C]

Like, why do you want to be. Like, why do they want to hold on to some sort of anger, hold on to some sort of angst about us or whatever? And you feel it. Like, you feel that negative energy as it passes by you. And I'm just like, why let it go? Because it's taken them a lot more energy to be mad than it is for me not to really give a crap.

[A]

Can I address that? Because you're allowing their negative energy to give you negative energy. Like, I totally ignore them now. Like, it doesn't bother me at all.

[C]

It doesn't bother me at all.

[D]

Well, it was a shocking. I came around the corner, and there was a human that was in the hallway with me. So as another human, I looked at them and smiled, and I sorry that it was her that came by. Because if I had known ahead of time. And then it changes my behavior because I'm not. You know, I'm not that way. I'm not gonna just walk by somebody.

[B]

In the hospital, but don't change your behavior. Like, walk by them. And if you see them, go, good morning.

[D]

Oh, are you kidding me? How can you, after all this time, spend for seven years just saying hi to somebody? Eventually, you're just not gonna do it. I just think it's rude. And you talk and you talk about how she wouldn't work here, but I'm saying, in this industry, you never know where you're gonna end up. And there's a guarantee that I will never, ever do anything to help that woman out.

[A]

I am. I'm totally ambivalent to both of them. Like, I couldn't care less now. But I do respect the fact that they are telling me without telling me, I hate you. And I don't want to even look at you.

[D]

Respect is a word to say for behavior.

[B]

I really do appreciate might be the better word. But at some point it became comical to me, and I think it became comical because harboring that kind of angst is going to hold them down and is going to prevent them and just from knowing how the radio industry works and knowing the polite way to say this, knowing the transition that they have seen firsthand at one end of the hall and the stability that they have seen at the other end of the hall. And I wish them luck and I hope there's stability and great, you know, good things happen at both ends of the hall. But the tradition they've seen, the transition at one end and the stability at the other. It's just amusing to me that it has never dawned on them that perhaps for the reasons Melissa described, an occasional nod in the hall should be in order.

[D]

It would change everything.

[A]

Hey, Laverne, you're on Q100.

[E]

Hey. I was just. I completely agree with Melissa. I had this happen to me at work, and it took so much energy to ignore the person back that I finally decided I wasn't that person. I don't do that. I'm going to say hi and it's going to be up to them to say hi back or not. But I don't understand the energy. I mean, it really does take energy to ignore somebody who's. Who you're in the same room with. I don't get it.

[A]

Here's why I appreciate it so much. Like, I spent so much of my time in my life being a people pleaser that the. The. My knee jerk reaction is always to say hello to them. But they have taken that away because they have allowed me to know that they absolutely don't want anything to do with me.

[B]

I've been walking through the halls with my head down and, you know, you sense the presence of someone else. Maybe you hear the feed or you see them or whatever. Like, if you're reading, or in my case, probably read my BlackBerry and I'll look up with the intention of saying hi or good morning and see it's them and go, oh, I don't have to.

[A]

Yeah, right. There's a presence taken off.

[D]

It was a surprise around the corner for me. But what, I don't know, the fascinating thing to me is the fact that she and I have never spoke. Like, it's one thing. Like you say, like it's one thing.

[B]

You're hated by association.

[D]

Yeah. If we had had words or we had an issue before and there was an actual reason why she wasn't speaking to me, then I could understand. But we have not had a conversation, and she has this disdain for me, and I just don't understand it.

[B]

I think it's.

[C]

I think it's disdain in general. I really do think it's disdain.

[D]

If I had a conversation with her, I'd find out.

[C]

No, I mean, like, towards us or the station or whatever. I don't think that it's you specifically. Like, she. Some sort of personal problem with you.

[B]

But it's the Bert show and everything associated with it.

[A]

Well, she was an intern. She was an intern for us for a while, which I don't even really remember. And you remember she blocked it. You know what? All that's inconsequential. It's all inconsequential. What? Her reasons are totally inconsequential. She has a hatred for us. And the way that she and he choose to. To. To show that is just by ignoring us. I love it. I love being hated.

[C]

I just don't even pay attention to it anymore. It's just negative energy. And it's like, bleh.

[B]

There is part of me that I'm fascinated that Birch said respect. And all of a sudden, I feel like a light has been turned on for me because there is part of me that hates myself when I go. This happened very recently with Jessica, where I went home and told Jessica about some time I had in the company of someone who I consider a toxic person. Negative energy surrounds this person. But I played the game and was nice and smiled and hugs and how are you? And blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I came home and was telling Jessica about it, and she's like, if it's that. If the poison is that bad for you, then why are you doing the pretend, the smile, the hug, the whatever? Like, why can't you just make it that obvious? I'm like, I don't know.

[A]

Cause I think if you look at your life, basically, people live a fake life. Like 70% of your day, really. I really do.

[B]

I don't think it's a fake life. I think they live the easier life, the easier life. And for me, it's easier if I'm in the company of this said toxic person who I don't care for. The other people around us obviously like this person, because that's how they ended up in the mixed company. Right? So the easier way out just to go along with it, rather than say, I gotta be honest, I have an issue with some things you're doing. Some things you're saying. Some things you. Blah, blah, blah. People don't do that because that's. That creates drama, and people just want to avoid it.

[A]

Yeah. Hey, Ben, you're on Q100.

[E]

Hey, guys.

[D]

Love the show. Thank you.

[B]

Oh, Lord. How old are you?

[E]

I'm 12.

[A]

Okay. Wisdom of Ben. Go for it, man.

[E]

Hey, I gotta agree with Burton, Jeff. You know, I think you gotta totally honor the person that they're not, like, doing a fake smile or nod, and then they're stimming behind you your back, and, you know, it's like, at least they're honest and upfront with you.

[D]

Encouraging a kid to be rude to.

[A]

People at school, I don't think.

[B]

No, we're not.

[A]

No, there's nothing. No, I don't think that's encouraging. Be rude. At least you know where you stand with these people. And they've built a resume now. Their rudeness has been built for so long that it's almost. It's appreciated now.

[E]

Yeah. Talk to Melissa. And they didn't know her. It's like they're totally just going over. But you got to respect that.

[D]

I mean, I don't respect it.

[E]

I mean, you gotta respect that. Like, they don't do it to some people and completely ignore the others. I mean, it's all or nothing.

[A]

Yeah. Like, how many times has somebody smiled to you? And then you find out through the grapevine that, hey, this person can't happen to Annetta.

[B]

Annetta quit her job over it.

[D]

Yeah. I don't know.

[B]

And the energy, the set, the way you have to look at it is, if everything is energy, Melissa, you are letting their energy impact your day. And what Burt has done is come up with a way to.

[A]

I've embraced it.

[B]

It doesn't affect him. And it almost empowers me.

[D]

I didn't remember it until Bert brought it up just a second ago. So it has not affected my day. But I think.

[A]

But you started out talking about it first thing this morning.

[D]

Yeah, because it just happened right before I walked in the door. And I just think it's rude, and I don't respect. Respect that behavior ever.

[A]

I should say appreciate. I don't know that I appreciate it. I appreciate it. We keep referring to Annetta. Annetta is a DJ who is in Alabama.

[C]

Alabama.

[A]

Okay. And she just got fed up with all this BS that we're talking about behind the scenes, and she decided to quit her job on the radio. Do you guys remember Annetta?

[F]

The big stuff. Station 93BL. Exodus, Gulf Coast. Number one for hip hop and RB. And now with Ray, Ray and Miranda, the home team in the morning. Do it to It. What better song to do it to? It is our net of the move set. And I told you I had a very important announcement. And here it is. I refuse. I refuse to walk around and watch people on my job looking over my shoulder.

[B]

Here we go.

[F]

People lying to me. People talking about me.

[B]

What are they saying?

[A]

Disregarding.

[F]

Ridiculous.

[A]

It is.

[F]

It is sad.

[B]

Sad.

[F]

I can't take it. I'm not gonna take it.

[B]

Don't take it.

[F]

I don't have to take it. I'm not a dummy. I know how to find another job. But I refuse to walk around people. You can say what you want to say about me, and if you see me on the street, I'll let you know whatever you want to know. But I refuse. For the last six years, I made six dollars.

[D]

Nothing.

[F]

I just got a raise. After six years, I know I'm qualified. And after saying this, I don't care if I ever get another job in radio, Period. It does not matter to me. But I never will not be setting the mood at BLX no more. I refuse to walk around with people that'll speak to you. Hey, Annetta, how you doing? But then, as soon as you walk by that bitch, I will not do it to myself anymore. So if you're confused about what I'm saying, listen very carefully. I quit this bitch.

[A]

The Bird Show. Hey, Brian. What's going on?

[D]

Brian.

[G]

Brian, how are you?

[A]

Good. How are you, man?

[B]

Hey, Brian.

[G]

Tired?

[A]

Yeah. Dude, you're only a weekend of this. You're a week into this trip, and you sound beat.

[G]

Well, we still haven't adjusted to the time zone change. It's like, I still haven't figured out what time it is here. I think it's almost 9 o' clock at night.

[E]

Where are you?

[G]

We're in Bogor, Indonesia.

[D]

Okay.

[G]

About an hour by train south of Jakarta.

[A]

For those of you that don't know who Mandy and Brian are, they're traveling the world together. At least that's the plan for a year and a half. And they're not married. And they've been trying to organize this trip for the longest time. And we're gonna follow them along on their trip. And they were supposed to fly out, or they did fly out to Singapore, but it was right at the sort of the height of who do you know? So we didn't get to talk to him from the airport. This is the first time that we've had a chance to talk to him since they left. So tell us everything that happened at the airport when you landed. Has there been like this one epic realization moment that you are gone for the next year and a half? Are you scared? Are you still excited?

[G]

Well, mainly just drained from the 26 hour flight to get over here. So Vegas, and we landed in Singapore. I don't know if you've ever been there, but Singapore is basically like. It might as well be in America at this point. So it doesn't really feel that different.

[A]

I hate that.

[G]

I think the realization. The realization for us was we took the ferry to Indonesia and we got off at Batam, like in the real islands, which is basically, you know, it's a 20 minute ride from Singapore, but it's like another planet. I mean, you know, it was like going from New York City to somewhere in rural Guatemala or something like that.

[B]

Are you gonna take them?

[G]

That was sort of the point where like, okay, now we're actually traveling, but.

[B]

Are you gonna take the martyr to Jakarta?

[A]

All right, Jeff, you need to leave. Hold on. Excuse me.

[D]

Sorry. Brian.

[A]

Brian, just go.

[D]

Jeff.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

It's only nine more minutes.

[D]

I'm not.

[A]

I'm not kicking you out. I'm just telling you, you're useless. So just go.

[B]

I'm just saying, if you want.

[A]

Now just go.

[B]

I can make it eight and a half more minutes.

[A]

No, go.

[B]

Seriously, get out. I'm fine.

[C]

No more Marta jokes.

[D]

Marta to Jakarta, please. Come on.

[B]

Because they rhyme. So it's amusing.

[A]

How are you and Mandy getting along in the first leg of this trip?

[G]

We're getting along fine now. It's kind of stressful, the beginning of it, dealing with horrible jet lag and a 12 hour time difference and not knowing where we're going and the fact that it's, you know, like 8,000 degrees here. So I don't know, it was a little rough the first couple of days, but it's been fine. So have you guys once we kind of get used to it.

[A]

So you guys were arguing the first couple of days just because of the fatigue?

[G]

Yeah, because of the fatigue. And we still haven't figured out, you know, like, how to get around in places where nobody speaks the language and that sort of thing. But we're. We've got it worked out by now, I think, you know, we've kind of both fallen into our separate roles. Like I navigate and handle the money, and Mandy plans and organizes and keeps track of things like my passport, because I'm not good at that sort of.

[D]

Thing because you can always tell when you're on vacation, when a car even here. And you tell, you know, tourists here in Atlanta when a couple's getting along when they're not. Because if they're getting along, they're walking together, and they're looking at the same thing at the same time. If they are not getting along, one is walking briskly in front of the other while the other one is trying to catch up, pretending that nobody's noticing.

[B]

That they're fighting while the other thing. While the other one says things like, I guess you don't want to get anything to eat right now. Yelling it after them as they. As they march ahead.

[D]

Right.

[B]

Angrily.

[G]

Yeah.

[D]

So you're walking together.

[G]

Mindy naturally walks a little slower than I do, so I constantly have to slow down and look back to make sure that she's there because, you know, I don't want her to get kidnapped or anything like that.

[A]

It's going to be interesting to see how these things while at right now they're tolerable because you're on the first week and a half of your trip, like, I can't wait to talk to you in six months, where you're like, and Mandy walks so freaking slow. It's driving me crazy.

[D]

And I can keep up with my passport just fine.

[A]

Right. Mandy's going to come on and go, I don't want his passport in my hands anymore.

[C]

Or it could be opposite thinking that much closer.

[G]

You know, we think the same sorts of things, even in that. On the chance you want to talk to Mandy.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Please.

[A]

Sure.

[G]

Let me pass you up to her.

[A]

Okay. You sound a little salty.

[E]

Hey, guys.

[B]

Hey.

[H]

How are you?

[A]

We think Brian sounds a little salty.

[E]

A little salty?

[A]

He sounds a little salty.

[C]

Is he tired? Cranky pants?

[E]

Not today, no.

[A]

But he has been, as a general rule, he's been pretty salty on this trip so far.

[E]

He's had an adjustment, like he said, to the time, and I think that actually starting this morning, he said he didn't feel very well. So he's been dealing with a headache today.

[A]

So that makes sense.

[D]

Yeah. So how did. How is it. Because he had mentioned how there's not a real plan on where. Well, of course, in a year and a half, you don't really need a plan of where you're going. I guess the biggest frustration right now is just getting around where you are now in Indonesia and not speaking the language. Has that been really stressful for you guys?

[E]

It has and it hasn't. Everyone here is actually, like, amazingly Friendly. And, you know, some people speak English and some just know a little. But everyone's really curious about us, so everyone wants to come over and say, like, the few English things they know. And it's usually, hello, where are you going? Is always the first question. And so we talk to everyone. And so that's been helpful. And so vocals, as far as the language isn't weird, but it's kind of daunting because we're in this country that we don't know anything about, and it's like, okay, where do we go now? And do you know, we consult guidebooks, and that's all we've got.

[A]

Do you have, like, this bubbling anxiety the entire time you guys are walking around a city that you don't know?

[E]

I think at first. Today I really did it. Today was kind of like, we finally. Because it's been a lot of traveling, trying to get somewhere where we actually wanted to be. Like, it's been a lot of transition. Like, we waited on an island for a couple days so we could get a ferry to Jakarta, and then we were in Jakarta for a night until we could get here. And so now we're finally somewhere where we like the town. And so it's kind of more of a let's stay here a couple of days before we try to figure out what next.

[C]

Can you describe Indonesia for us? Because I'm just thinking of Eat, Pray, Love, and you guys are in love right now.

[D]

This section.

[E]

That's true. I read that book, too. I loved it. Indonesia is, like Brian said, it is just shockingly hot. Like everyone told us before we left, like, well, you know, it's really hot over there. And we're like, well, duh, it's at the equator. Of course it's hot. We like warm weather. It'll be great. But no, I mean, it is shockingly hot to us. And like I said, we like warm weather, and it's just in humid and. But now we're. We're kind of in the mountains where they told us it's cooler. And I'm not really sure by whose standards it's cooler. I mean, I guess I'm. I'm not, like, dripping with sweat. I'm just a little sticky with sweat, is the difference.

[A]

It's gone from 120 to 115 degrees.

[E]

Sort of like that. But. But it's really pretty. Like, it's. Because of that. It's really lush and really green, and we're at the base of, like, these volcanoes, and so we can see the mountain and we've got this big town, and from our hostel, we look out over the city and it's all these, like, red tile roofs everywhere. And so that's cool. And it's a Muslim country, so there's also. We can see the peaks of all the mosque everywhere.

[A]

Are you guys taking pictures and are you journaling so where people can kind of follow along with y'? All?

[E]

We are. We ran into a snag trying to upload pictures at the latest Internet cafe. And so we have a bunch of pictures, like, more recently from our 28 hour ferry ride and from where we are and a lot of where we are now that we need to upload. And we're still trying to figure out how to get them to let us do that, but we are trying to update as often as possible.

[A]

Cool. Well, we got a link on over to your website also. So as soon as they get that worked out, we'll be looking at them as you're uploading them.

[D]

Right.

[A]

All right, let's talk to you in a couple of days here and we'll continue to follow on.

[E]

Okay.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

All right, good luck.

[A]

Good talking to you.

[E]

Thanks.

[D]

Bye.

[A]

Bye.

[D]

Okay, they gone. I find. I found it fascinating that once Brian got off the phone and she was talking, Mandy was talking. That notice how when she was. He was like, commenting on everything she said. Like, that's one of those things on vacation that's gonna start getting annoying.

[B]

She's gonna be on the phone with her mom or something. Tell her about the nice mosque.

[A]

Do you want to talk to Mom?

[D]

Because if you don't want to talk to mom, then just shut up.

[A]

I think they're gonna have control issues on this trip a little bit. I think they're going to.

[D]

We're not wishing. I think they'll be poorly for them because I think they'll end up being fine. But I do think you have to kind of iron out these wrinkles in the beginning of a trip.

[A]

Like, you got to have a leader. Maybe they do a part time leadership thing. Like, okay, we're in Indonesia. You take control. You know, when we go to wherever we're going next time, you're in control, dude, you can't. I can't work.

[B]

Because you're gonna get to country number two and you're gonna be like, oh, okay, so I get it. Because you want to sleep late. We're gonna sleep late. Even though when we were in Indonesia and I wanted to sleep late, I couldn't, even though I was the leader.

[A]

The Birch previously on The Birch Show.

[B]

So you ready?

[G]

Okay.

[E]

It looks empty. Oh, no, no, no. Okay, now they're. Yeah, they're like little pictures of.

[B]

Yep.

[E]

He's got some cars on here or something. Oh, I'm. I'm. I'm gonna have to call you guys back.

[A]

Seriously.

[E]

I'm sorry. I'm gonna have to call you guys back.

[A]

What did you find? Wait, wait, wait, wait. You promised us that you would tell us as you were downloading it.

[E]

And now that I have, I'm just going to call you guys back, okay?

[A]

Is it naked women or is it sex that you're talking about?

[D]

Hello? Oh, man. She used us.

[A]

Oh, okay. So that was a couple of days on the show.

[B]

That was a noise if I ever heard one.

[A]

And the deal we had made with Emily was this because she was calling us up. She's not savvy enough to know how to get to pictures on her computer, so she called us. And Jeff knows his way around a computer pretty well, so he led her all the way up to the place where she could start downloading the pictures. And the agreement we made was, if we're gonna do this, you gotta tell us exactly what's coming down as it's coming down. And then she bailed on us, Right. And for two days now, we've kind of been speculating that there must have been something really nasty on that computer.

[C]

And she had told us before that that her husband never looked at pornography and said he didn't even like it, Right. So it would've been really shocking for her to see, she said, even nude photos.

[A]

So we've been trying to get her on the phone, and she's blown us off. And she's not back with us today, but her husband. Okay, Chris, is on the phone now, and I think we're about to get chewed out.

[B]

Is Chris on the voice disguiser?

[A]

He is.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Hey, Chris.

[H]

Hey. Good morning, guys.

[A]

Good morning.

[H]

Just to confirm, my voice is being changed, is that right?

[A]

It is, yes. You're on the voice disguiser.

[G]

Great, great, great.

[H]

Yeah. So how do I even start this? The other day, my wife, you know, she had been hearing you guys talk on the radio about that you might reveal her name or our name if she didn't call back, you know.

[A]

Well, because she made an agreement with us.

[H]

Yes, I understand that. And she, you know, so she approached me and fessed up as to the call to you guys and what was going on. All I can really tell you is at this point is that she actually lied to you guys. She was Trying to get tech support, trying to figure out how to erase something on the computer that. That she had been doing.

[D]

What.

[H]

It wasn't trying to find out what. What was on my computer that I had downloaded or anything like that. It was. She was trying to figure out how to erase things permanently that she was up to. And that's really, at this point, all I'm willing to tell you guys. And, you know, your producer said that all we had to do is, you know, call and come on the show again, and I would be fine, and you wouldn't reveal our, you know, who we are.

[A]

We won't.

[H]

And at this point, that's. That's really the. You know, so we've kind of fulfilled our obligations. So just if. If that's enough for you guys, let's just kind of leave it at that.

[A]

Okay, so you won't tell us what she was down, what. What she was trying to erase?

[H]

You know, at this point, it's just kind of. I prefer that we just had our privacy on this and we'll go from there.

[C]

Okay, Chris, I completely respect that, but I just want you to know that if you don't let us know what it is, then everyone's going to assume maybe something worse than what it really is.

[H]

I don't really care what people assume. All I'm telling you is I'm not revealing any more than what I've just said.

[B]

So, you know, what happens when you assume.

[D]

Well, let me ask one question. When she sounded so shocked on us on the radio, that was part of a lie, like she. Or was she really genuinely shocked by what was still on the computer? Yeah, but you can answer. You can, you know, I mean, that's a.

[H]

She. She.

[E]

She was surprised that things that she.

[H]

Had done were still there.

[D]

Okay, so that's genuine surprise. Okay.

[A]

All right. So there must have been websites and it must have been pictures.

[H]

I don't really want to speculate, as you know what I mean, I don't really want you guys kind of. Were they crosses as rude or anything like that, But I just really don't want to continue the conversation about was she.

[B]

Was she looking at porn again?

[H]

You know, I'm sorry, it's. At this point, I'm just. That's really. All I'm willing to talk about.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

Were they personal pictures that she took that she didn't want you to see?

[H]

Look, so we've. We've kind of completed our end of the bargain. So from this point on, just don't. Please don't reveal who we are. And let's kind of stop the conversation here, okay?

[B]

Did she come across the pictures accidentally or on purpose?

[H]

Thank you. Thank you, guys. Have a great day.

[A]

You can keep asking if you like. Here's.

[C]

Did you realize that she's not really into men?

[B]

Hell yeah.

[A]

Now how do we know he's not lying?

[B]

We don't, because he's not.

[A]

Double espionage.

[B]

You have to have trust and faith. Gotta have faith, faith, faith.

[A]

Well, now we gotta speculate exactly what she must have been trying to erase off the computer. And she wasn't looking for files with pictures that she took and she uploaded. She was looking for websites that have.

[B]

Left images on her computer.

[A]

Right, so.

[B]

So she could have uploaded pictures of her no no's but didn't want her. What?

[D]

Why would her husband be offended by them?

[B]

Because maybe he's not sharing them with him. Maybe she's given her whatty. What? To another hooty.

[A]

Who?

[B]

Hooty Hoo. Hell yeah. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

[A]

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

[B]

Hell yeah.

[A]

Oh, so we're never gonna know. We're never gonna know. He only came on with us because we threatened to give her real identity out on the air. Because we made an agreement with her.

[D]

Yeah, because she said that she would tell us what she found if we told her how to find it.

[A]

Hey, Simone.

[E]

Hello.

[A]

Good morning.

[E]

Good morning.

[D]

Hi.

[E]

Hi. Hi, everybody. Love your show.

[D]

Thank you.

[E]

He was lying. First of all, his voice was so rickety, he couldn't even keep the story straight. And second of all, if she really wanted to delete it, she would have stayed on the phone with Jeff to maybe find out how to delete it.

[A]

Once she gets her.

[B]

Once you're in there, it's just. Well, there's good news and bad news. Once you're in there, it's just like being in any folder and you just delete the files you don't want. But if she tried to be slick about it and just delete everything, then she deletes some stuff that she needs and her computer will never be the same.

[A]

Hey, Tanya. Good morning. You're on qr.

[B]

And it will turn on her in her sleep and kill her.

[E]

Hey, I think it's crap. I mean, she came. I mean, if you replay it and you listen to her, she came on and said, oh, I see there's cars or whatever. And then she was real shocked. If she was doing stuff, why would she be shocked at what she was seeing?

[D]

And that's just a. I don't that's kind of what I asked him. And he said that his position was that she was shocked by what was still on the computer.

[B]

I don't think. I didn't think the. I thought. Didn't think, thought the end of her call that we had on with her last time. Like, the last. When she's like, okay, I gotta go. Like, I thought it was BS from that. Like, I thought she was snowing us the entire.

[C]

Like, you wrote me a note and.

[B]

Said, I think she's BS because the way she was at the end where she was like, Academy Award. Oh, no. I have found something. Uh oh. Uh, oh, I've got to go. I just said, aha. So you ready?

[E]

Okay. It looks empty. Oh, no, no, no. Okay, now they're. Yeah, they're like little pictures of.

[B]

Yep.

[E]

He's got some cars on here or something. Oh, I'm gonna have to call you guys back.

[A]

Seriously.

[E]

I'm sorry. I'm gonna have to call you guys back.

[A]

What did you find?

[G]

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

[A]

You promised us that.

[E]

Open the file.

[A]

And so you think that was just a big old acting job right there?

[B]

We've got a lie detector.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Is that lie detector dance?

[A]

But why would he.

[C]

Why would they go on it with us?

[B]

Because obviously their fear is us revealing the whole thing. So if we said right now. Okay, you revealed that. But we have to be honest with you. Our audience, our listeners piled up and said, there's no we don't believe you and say so all we want to do. So if you're telling the truth, here's why. They'll go out with this. If you're telling the truth and you pass the lie detector, we will never air it. If you're lying, we want to run the lie detector with the lies in it. Make sense.

[A]

Can I run the call on the lie detector anyway?

[B]

You can't. I've already asked him that. There's been some things Melissa's told me that I wanted to scan through there.

[A]

Hey, Sam, you're on Q100. Good morning.

[B]

That whole kidney nonsense.

[E]

This might be a little extreme, but I just thought, what if she actually found child pornography and she's trying to protect him? That's why she had to go. And of course he has to defend himself.

[B]

Da da da da da da da da da da da da da da.

[G]

Da da da da.

[C]

That would be really disturbing.

[D]

Yeah. I would want to protect him for.

[B]

That fun call of the morning.

[A]

Right? Because she would have been way more shocked. It would have been a much More authentic tone, I think, if it had anything to do that serious.

[B]

Do you see what I'm saying, though, when you listen back to it? And I forgot that I said to Javi, said, I think she's BS or something.

[C]

Yes, you wrote a note. I think she's fake.

[A]

Hey, kay, you're on Q100.

[E]

Hey. No, I don't think it's child pornography. I think she found like, a picture of her friends or something, you know, like naked, like, you know what I mean? Like an affair or something.

[B]

Like personal pictures of her husband's.

[E]

No, of like one of her friends or somebody she knew, you know, with her husband.

[D]

Or do you think in general that maybe. I mean.

[E]

Yeah, maybe one of her girlfriends sent her husband, like, a naked picture or, you know, something like that.

[A]

I don't know. I'm with Jeff. She just sounded like she was lying. She's just putting on an acting job. I think we should try the lie detector thing with them.

[D]

If they're him or her.

[C]

I'm gonna even answer our phone calls at this point because you did say when we were on the phone with him that we wouldn't.

[A]

We wouldn't what? We wouldn't reveal their identity. Right. Did I?

[B]

But we don't.

[H]

Can't.

[B]

Can we go? Can't we go? Can we go back to them and say, look, we didn't say we were going to because you're going to come on and clear this up. Unfortunately, our jury, the listeners pretty unanimously say you haven't cleared it up. Like, there's not one person calling going, I buy it.

[A]

We could go so far back in the show if I just keep hitting.

[B]

This.

[A]

That I didn't say it, that I didn't say we wouldn't air their names. I can go back 20 minutes, but.

[C]

I feel bad about that.

[D]

Well, we can't say we won't and then do it.

[A]

But if we go back. Stop.

[B]

I'm already in the 8 o' clock entertainment buzz.

[D]

But if we make. So if we make the call we can't replay. I'm trying to figure out why we have to give their identities out to do the lie detector.

[C]

That would be. The only reason they would come on is if we threatened to give out their names.

[D]

Well, we can't do that now.

[A]

Yeah, we can. If I go back and never say it.

[B]

Great.

[A]

Let's keep going.

[B]

Hey, I'm looking forward to the weekend and you've got me on late Wednesday. Now I'm annoyed.

[A]

Hey, Brandon, you're on Q100, dude.

[G]

I'm telling you, the chick was uploading pictures of herself. What probably happened is that she was trying to get with somebody else. I don't understand why it's so inconceivable that she was probably trying to cheat on him. I believe the guy's story. And the thing is that.

[E]

That.

[G]

That the whole replay that you did, you could totally hear how she was lying. You could hear her voice totally changing. And I've got to go. You know, it's totally. It's visible. I mean, and it's not inconceivable that she was really cheating on him, that.

[D]

He could have been telling the truth.

[C]

It's exactly what I told him. If you don't tell us what it is, everybody's going to assume the worst.

[D]

What might have been that Chris was.

[A]

Going to say that. Don't give out the names because no future callers will ever call in if we breach that trust. And I agree with that.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

And here's another Chris before we move on. Hey, Chris.

[E]

Hey, how are you?

[A]

Hi, how are you?

[E]

I love the show. Been listening to you since you were of no signal whatsoever.

[D]

Thank you.

[E]

And I just wanted to say, in the last couple years that I've been listening to the show, this is the first time I've ever been completely disappointed. This is just a bunch of bull.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

He should have disappointed you a lot? The fact that this is the first time.

[E]

Yeah, I just think that was so tacky that he used you guys like that and that y' all can't figure this out.

[A]

Well, I mean, there was something we could do to give you closure on it, but we can't.

[B]

And that might be my fault, because when he. When I learned the twist, then I just. I took that. I thought that was so cool that I just took it at face value and didn't think. Lie detector didn't think he could be making it up. Like, I gotta be honest. I never saw this coming.

[A]

Hey, the bird show.