Full Show PT 2: Monday, March 23 [Vault]

Summary

The Bert Show — Full Show PT 2: Monday, March 23 [Vault]

Air Date: March 23, 2026
Summary by Podcast Summarizer

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Episode Overview

This spirited and candid episode of The Bert Show tackles several lively and relatable topics. The first half is a robust discussion about discrimination against hiring women of childbearing age, drawing from recent pop culture events, real listener calls, and the cast’s own experiences. The latter portion pivots to lighter fare: the team’s playful take on “superficial life goals” for the year and a listener dilemma about whether to change her toddler's name after discovering it’s the same as her husband’s ex-fiancée. The conversation is heartfelt with doses of humor, wit, and empathy for listeners.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Bias Against Hiring Women of Childbearing Age

(Starts ~01:00)

• Prompted by: M.I.A.'s extraordinary Grammy performance on her due date and scheduled Oscar performance. Host wonders if examples like this challenge workplace prejudice about women's productivity during pregnancy.
• The Question: Are there people (especially women) who won’t hire a woman of childbearing age? Are such biases still prevalent?
• Cast’s Position: The hosts express hope modern workplaces are beyond such discrimination but suspect it still happens, sometimes rationalized by personal negative experiences.

Notable Calls:

• Realtor in Labor (Caller Marcus) (04:25):

  • “My wife, in the midst of labor, between contractions, was a realtor, took phone calls. In this market, you can't walk away from a sale.” (04:35)
  • Jen: “So she was in labor and doing business?” (04:45)

• Hiring Discrimination Confessions:

  • Caller Sarah relates a job interview where she was explicitly told, “We can't have some—we’re not going to hire somebody that [is] automatically going to need that term off.” (05:46)
  • Another Sarah (retail hiring manager) candidly admits: “If they say they’re trying to start a family… I actually will not hire them.” (06:09)
  • Jess (caller/hiring manager) defends: “I know that’s a terrible thing to say, but when you’re at work, you’re at work, and I need you to do the job when you’re here.” (06:45)
  • Melissa challenges generalizations: “There’s plenty of pregnant women that I’ve seen that work a hell of a lot harder than other men or women who are in that job.” (08:03)

• HR Perspective:

  • Jess (HR manager) clarifies: “It’s completely illegal to ask if you have kids or family… you’re supposed to base your hiring decision on the skills and the knowledge that the person has. I’m in HR.” (09:37)
  • Melissa: “We’re learning that that’s the worst thing you can do [disclose family plans in interviews].” (10:36)

Overall Tone:

Empathetic but firm in denouncing workplace discrimination based on family plans or gender. Multiple hosts and listeners call out the unfairness and legality of such practices, while also acknowledging—uncomfortably—how prevalent these biases still are.

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2. Work-Life Balance: Success Stories from Pregnant Women

(13:03 – 14:06)

• Surgeon’s Story:
  A female surgeon shares how she performed surgery experiencing back pain, later realized she was five centimeters dilated and in labor.
  • Melissa: “She performed surgery and finished her surgery before she went and had that baby.” (13:58)
• These calls showcase women’s resilience, counterarguments to stereotypes about commitment and productivity during pregnancy.

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3. Superficial Goals for the Year

(Starts ~15:56)

The cast members share lighthearted “superficial goals” for 2009:

• Jeff: Determined to catch a blue marlin after years of unsuccessful fishing attempts. (15:56)
• Jen: Wants to play a decent round of golf, reviving her childhood pastime. (17:36)
• Wendy: Determined to “be friends with a player in the NFL” (any relation will do). (18:26)
• Host/The Bert Show: Wants to get on a game show—“be slumdog.” (19:17)
• Melissa: Aims to voice a character in a cartoon or video game, referencing her “resident geek” status.
  • Through networking, she gets the opportunity to voice a shopkeeper in “Global Agenda,” a game developed by Hi-Rez Studios (21:13).
  • Describes in detail the process of motion capture, voice acting, and game development.

Notable Quote

• Melissa: “The beauty of Hi-Rez... their assignment for me was to figure out what things I wanted to do with these codes...what crazy things would I allow my character to do that somebody playing the game could actually make me do.” (24:26)

Tone:

Fun, collaborative, and interactive (invites listeners’ suggestions for actions her character should perform in-game).

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4. Should You Change Your Child's Name? Listener Dilemma

(Starts ~27:55) — Main Story From 28:24–38:16

Caller Camille’s Dilemma:

• Her young daughter is named Lucia Ray—chosen by her husband under a pre-birth deal (if girl, he names; if boy, she does).
• After nearly two years, caller discovers Lucia Ray was also the name of his ex-fiancée—information concealed until a relative mentioned it.
• Camille is distressed and has struggled for six months, even avoiding using her own daughter's name.

Cast Reaction:

• Universal empathy for Camille; consensus is it’s not too late to change the child’s name.
• Jen: “I say change it. I mean, your child's two, right? Yeah, she's not gonna remember.” (31:29)
• Melissa: Warns of worse emotional consequences if the mother’s discomfort remains: “If she can't say the name without having a… you know, the child will absorb that negative energy the mom is going to give…” (32:16)
• Jeff: Recognizes the emotional weight: “He thinks about his ex-fiancé every time he says her name.” (34:42)

Listeners Call In:

• Listener adopted at three: “I don’t remember ever being called by my other name.” (35:29)
• Another: “She should definitely change the name. Because as a girl, I would be really scarred and hurt that my father disrespected my mother in that way.” (34:05)

Further Complication: The Husband’s Response

• When confronted, the husband justifies naming the child after his ex, saying she was “full of respect and honor and anyone would be lucky to have that name.” (37:21)
  • Jeff (reacting): “Oh, that’s a deal breaker.” (37:38)
  • Hosts express concern over bigger issues in the marriage regarding deception and emotional attachment.

Advice:

• All hosts urge Camille to change the name and, when appropriate, explain the decision honestly to her daughter in the future.
• Host (jokingly): “Why don't you name her after her father and call her a hole?” (36:07)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “I hate that the workforce still does not honor the fact that the only way that families are created is if she has this opportunity to do that, you know?” — Melissa, on workplace pregnancy bias (04:07)
• “If you were interviewing… would you edit what you say...?” — Host, pushing for practical strategies in interviews (08:16)
• “It's completely illegal to ask if you have kids or family... that definitely opens up a can of worms in a lawsuit.” — Jess (HR), 09:37
• “So she was in labor and doing business?” — Jen, 04:45
• “You should definitely change the name. Because as a girl, I would be really scarred and hurt that my father disrespected my mother in that way...” — Listener Stephanie, 34:05
• “If she can't say the name without having a... you know, the child will absorb that negative energy the mom is going to give and then the child will take it personally...” — Melissa, 32:16
• “Why don't you name her after her father and call her a hole?” — Host (deadpan joke), 36:07

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Important Timestamps

• 01:00-14:06 — Women, Pregnancy, and Workplace Discrimination (calls and panel discussion)
• 13:03-13:48 — Female surgeon shares story of operating while in labor
• 15:56-26:14 — Superficial goals for the year, Melissa’s foray into video game voice acting
• 27:55-38:16 — Listener Camille’s story about wanting to change her daughter's name and robust cast/listener discussion

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The Bert Show’s Signature Tone

Consistently conversational, quick-witted, supportive, and non-judgmental even when tackling contentious issues. Hosts tease each other and callers, but always return to a place of empathy and good-natured humor. Listeners’ voices are foregrounded, and practical advice merges with personal anecdotes.

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A great episode for those who appreciate real talk about tricky professional and family dynamics, plus a few laughs about personal goals and crazy life situations.

Transcript

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[Host (The Bird Show)]

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[Host (The Bird Show)]

The Bird Show. I want to talk for a few minutes about and I asked for phone calls. And this will be a situation where only one phone call is all we need about Mia and her recent performance at, what was it, the Grammy?

[Jeff]

Grammys.

[Jen]

Yeah, she performed on her due date at the Grammys and then just had the baby. Had a little boy.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

And she is scheduled, what, next Saturday,

[Jen]

you said she's scheduled for Sunday night to perform at the Oscars.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Okay.

[Jen]

Because there's this song called Osiah that's on the Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack that she performs. So she's gonna be there to perform that. Isn't that amazing?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Here's the thought that somehow this came up in conversation, I think during one of our after show meetings. And we know there's these people out here. It's just a matter of getting them to admit it. Is there anyone listening who. And I think this is a combination of the Mia story and then that phone call we took a week or two ago about the woman who had to fire somebody. Is there anyone listening who intentionally will not hire a woman who is of childbearing years? Because now we see what Mia can do. We can give you a fair amount of grief because it is possible that to be just as productive and take care of his.

[Jen]

If you're having a healthy pregnancy and you're not on doctor ordered bed rest or whatever else could happen.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Right. And we're just Looking for someone. I think it would be most shocking if it was a female, but who is prepared to admit that they would not hire a woman of childbearing years.

[Jen]

Well, just that age. Like, maybe it's somebody who's just gotten married and planning to start a family.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yep. Or maybe you've gotten burned by that in the past, you know, where you bring somebody in to be part.

[Melissa]

Yeah, yeah. Explain childbearing years. You're talking about her situation in her life. Are you talking about you're just not gonna hire anybody in their 20s and 30s?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yeah.

[Jen]

I think that's a pretty big window.

[Melissa]

40s.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

No, I think anybody who's in that position of their life, like, if you bring somebody in to interview, let's say they're 30 years old. They've been married two years. You know, she's 30 years old. She's been married two or three years, and they just bought their first house or so, you know, it's lined up

[Jen]

for the next thing.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Right. And the next step is going to be have a kid. Like, in the back of your mind, you're like, I don't want to bring somebody in. Spend a year training them, and then have them get pregnant. And six months later, they're gone for a year because, what is it, nine months? Six months. How long can you take off? Three months. Right.

[Jen]

It's 12 weeks is maternity leave.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yeah. So that's three months. So you're like, I don't want to train them.

[Jen]

But not all companies have to pay that whole thing out. You just have to keep your job.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Right. So somebody could think, I don't want to have him on board. I know. I'm pretty sure that some friends of mine who have their own business got. Would scammed be the wrong word?

[Jen]

Just burned.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yeah. Because somebody applied for a job and got the job, and they were, like, two months pregnant, and they knew it. And then, like, three months later, they announced, yeah, I just want to let you know that I'm having a baby in three months. Like, and they knew that they were

[Melissa]

scammed is a bad word. Because, I mean. I mean, it sounds like the woman. I don't know. It just. Yeah, it just sounds like it's a bad thing that she's pregnant. It's a bad thing she's having children. Like, I hate that the workforce still does not honor the fact that the only way that families are created is if she has this opportunity to do that, you know?

[Jen]

Right.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Hey, Marcus is married to Mia. What's going on, buddy?

[Caller]

Maybe your sister yeah.

My wife, in the midst of labor

between contractions, was a realtor, took phone calls. In this market, you can't walk away from a sale.

[Jen]

So she was in labor and doing business?

[Caller]

Yes.

[Jen]

Unbelievable.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Did the people she was talking with know what was going on?

[Caller]

Yes.

I mean, kind of. Yeah. He. In fact, I think the comment was, wow, that's a first.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Of course. Of course it's a guy. Because if it's a woman who in. Who calls and she's like, well, I might have to get off the phone quick, cause I'm in labor. The woman's like, I'll call you in a week.

[Melissa]

Yeah, take your time.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Goodbye. See you later.

[Jen]

Like, oh, okay. So what's the percentage on that closing cost?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Did she close the deal?

[Caller]

She did.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

All right, good.

[Melissa]

Both of them.

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Hey, Sarah, welcome to the show.

[Caller]

Good morning.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

What's going on?

[Caller]

Well, I interviewed with an auto finance company one time, and they asked if I was married. And I said, no, I'm engaged. Soon to be married. He asked if I had a family yet, and I told him that, you know, we were planning to have kids soon and I didn't get the job.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

And you think that's directly the director?

[Caller]

He told me. That's why he said, you know, we can't have some. We're not going to hire somebody that automatically going to need that term off.

[Jen]

Wow. I wonder if that's legal.

[Caller]

Yeah, I don't think so.

[Jen]

I don't think so either. You could have had some sort of lawsuit there.

[Caller]

Yes, I didn't, but I should have.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Hey, this is a different Sarah. Welcome to the show.

[Caller]

Hello.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

How are you?

[Caller]

Good.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

What's going on?

[Jess]

I actually work for a retail company, and I'll always ask in my interviews for them to tell a little bit about themselves to me. And if they say that they're trying to start a family and they're trying to have children, I actually will not hire them.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

And obviously you'll find another reason to exclude them from.

[Jen]

You don't say that. Right.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Like, what?

[Jess]

No, you actually, you cannot. You cannot ask them any questions about their family or anything that's going on that's actually illegal. But no, if they tell me about it, I won't hire them.

[Jen]

Why is that?

[Jess]

Just because I know that they're going to have to be out and that they're really not going to be focused on the job at hand. And I know that's a terrible thing to say, but when you're at work, you're at work, and I need you to do the job when you're here.

[Jen]

But don't you think they're pregnant, everybody into that same category?

[Jess]

Well, I actually have two children, so it's. It's crazy that I. That I think that way. But I have been burned in the past, and I've had. Had, you know, women in the past that have just been, you know, called out and been sick and just, you know, really have not been focused on the business in order for me to run my business.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

What are their categories?

[Melissa]

Well, I'm just curious. I'm sorry to interrupt, Jess, but I'm curious about when you say not focus at the job. So you're talking a woman who is trying to have a family can't focus on the job because you said you wouldn't hire somebody who said they're planning a family. Or you talk about a pregnant woman, somehow she just can't focus on the job. Because I disagree on both counts.

[Jess]

I'm not saying that they can't focus on the job. I'm saying a lot of women.

[Melissa]

That's what you said, though.

[Jess]

I'm saying a lot of women take pregnancy and use it as an excuse to not come to work.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

No kidding. You seen Tracy?

[Melissa]

I mean, that's just ridiculous. But okay.

[Jen]

I mean, it may have been in her specific situation, but what I don't think is fair is to apply that to every woman.

[Melissa]

Agreed. If the one person burned you or scammed you or all the words we've heard today, I mean, there's plenty of pregnant women that I've seen that work a hell of a lot harder than other men or women who are in that job.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

If you were, Sarah, if you were interviewing for a job, let's say you lost yours. And fast forward six months from now, you're interviewing for a job. Would you edit what you say when they ask you that tell me about yourself question?

[Caller]

I would. I wouldn't.

[Jess]

I don't think I would bring it up. I don't think that.

[Caller]

That.

[Jess]

I mean, I don't know, because I don't think that I would. Would say, you know, hey, I'm trying to have kids. So, you know, just letting you know that this is coming second to me right now. I don't think I would say that.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Cool. Thank you for the call.

[Melissa]

Yeah, I mean, I do remember, and I think that's in general, whether you're talking about children or anything. I know that one of the things I did in college is, like, there was this competition for, like, interviewing. One of the things they talked about Is the fact that sometimes the interviewer, not only just to find out, like she's trying to find out to, you know, keep you from getting the job because you're trying to have a family, but just in general, trying to throw you off course to see, I guess, how easily you can be thrown off course. So in an interview, I think it's just smart to always focus on the job, Always focus on your skills. Even if they ask you questions about your personal life, which they. I guess they can't, but if they veer toward that direction, just always veer it back to the place of business. And I think.

[Jen]

And your personality traits and your skills that you bring to the table, that

[Melissa]

applies to the job. And never, ever talk about anything else.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

And never admit to wanting to have kids and distracting yourself from the job.

[Jen]

Yes, those little devils.

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Hey, Melissa. Welcome to the show.

[Jess]

Hey, Harry. It's completely illegal to ask if you have kids or family, just as you can ask if you have transportation. You're supposed to base your hiring decision on the skills and the knowledge that the person has. I'm in hr. If I ever ask someone if they have kids, then even though that might not be the reason I did not choose them, that definitely opens up a can of worms in a lawsuit. And you can't definitely say, that's not why I choose.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

But there's gotta be, I guess, tricks like, tell me about yourself, or can you say, well, tell me a little bit about you, Melissa. What do you do when you're not working? Like, is that a fair question?

[Jess]

You can say stuff like that and say, do you have some challenges that helps you not go to work in the future? What were some reasons that you had to call out? There's ways to beat around the bush, but you can't directly say, do you have kids? How is your family life? Do you plan to get married? Do you have any vacations planned or anything like that?

[Melissa]

Well, yeah. And I guess even when you get to that point, going back to what we were saying is just try to always answer the question based on the job you're applying for, you know, just to keep yourself safe. Because I think a lot of times people go in there, get comfortable, or pretend like the interviewer is their friend, you know, because the interviewer comes across so sweet and you want this job so badly, so you're gonna pretend to be their friend. And obviously, we're learning that that's the worst thing you can do.

[Jen]

It's a tactic to find out more about you.

[Melissa]

Exactly.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Sarah. Welcome to the show.

[Caller]

Hey, good morning.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

How are you? You're on the voice disguiser.

[Caller]

Thank you. First of all, I'd like to say I love your show. You guys wake me up every morning. I wouldn't be able to get out of bed without you.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

That's so cool. Thank you very much.

[Caller]

But I was calling in because I am a hiring manager, and I work in a field with a lot of women. And, you know, I don't want to be discriminatory. I know it sounds wrong to say that women can't balance family and career, but I have situations all the time where women have to call out because.

Excuse me.

Because of their kids or because of their husband or, you know, they use. So sometimes it's true, sometimes it's not. And it gets really frustrating because you always have to find someone to fill in for them.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

So you purposely will not hire a woman because of the challenges. Finger quotes that may come up.

[Caller]

I try to hire women who are single and who are career focused because women who have children and families tend to not be focused on their career.

[Melissa]

What is so funny to me?

[Caller]

And that their families come first.

[Melissa]

What is so funny to me that we have in our culture? I mean. And so the men have the pressure to focus only on work and not on family. You know what I mean? So if there's a family involved and there's a mother and father involved, a lot of times you're finding that the mother's having to overcompensate because of what you're hearing and the guy in the pressure he feels at work.

[Jen]

Both things are expected to be the woman's responsibility.

[Melissa]

Yes.

[Jen]

And I think a lot of people are going through that today because it's President's Day. We talked about it earlier, like, you've gotta work, but your kids are out of school.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

You know another topic.

[Melissa]

Children should not be a liability.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Forgive the word I'm about to use, but another topic was born out of this.

[Jen]

What?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Brag about what your wife did during labor. Hey, Kim. Welcome to the show.

[Caller]

Hi.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Hi. You're on the Voice disguiser.

[Caller]

Great. I'm a surgeon, actually.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Okay. So this is what you did during labor?

[Caller]

Yes, this is what I did during labor. I was operating, and I was having some back pain that I kind of blew off because I thought, well, the baby's not due for another three weeks. And I finished my case and went to the office and was seeing patients. And it turns out by lunchtime, when my husband finally made me go to my gynecologist, I was 5 centimeters dilated.

[Melissa]

And so you performed surgery while you were in labor.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

What type of surgery were you performing while you were in labor?

[Caller]

I would rather not say. It was not emergent surgery.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Okay. So. All right. Well, thank you. Thank you so much for the call.

[Jess]

That's impressive.

[Melissa]

Yeah, but that and the same with the realtor. They both did it successfully.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

We have multiple calls, so we'll put this on the list and it'll come up again.

[Melissa]

When you talk about a woman not being able to endure pain, she performed surgery and finished her surgery before she went and had that baby.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

The Birch show.

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[Jeff]

so we all made superficial goals for 2009. Things that you know, not deep seated Goals, Right. Emotional goals. You know, something superficial that we could all try to. Try to get done this year. Mine was try to. I got to catch a blue marlin this year. I mean, for years I've been to trying hunting this thing down. And every time I go deep sea fishing, I mean, I've probably spent over a thousand dollars now deep sea fishing. And they look up into the boat and they laugh at me. They point with their little long noses. Ah, not today, buddy. Not gonna happen for you.

[Wendy]

And Jeff, when did you catch your first marlin?

[Jeff]

Well, you weren't even walking yet, right?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yeah, it wasn't. It wasn't really me, but it was my. I mean, it technically was my pole. I'm not the one who pulled it into the boat, but the one who got it with my pole.

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

And I. It was. And it's happened more than once for you?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

No, it only happened once, but I'm. When I was just. Because the way you. When you go deep sea fishing, it's such a. Like, it shouldn't really be called deep sea fishing because the crew does everything. Yeah, you get. You get on the boat and then they tell you. They ask you where you want to sit and you sit down. So I just sat next to whoever was I was with, you know, like my dad or whatever. I chose that seat totally randomly. And they cast the polo and they put in the whole thing. And then basically your whole job is to. When the reel starts to go, you tell someone and then they pull it out and they strap you in in this whole big thing. But if you're like 12 years old and somebody else does it. Sorry about that.

[Jeff]

He was 12 when he got his done. And I'm telling you, I'm not. Six, seven, eight times now, maybe I've gone deep sea fishing. Mexico, Greece, you know, Florida, nowhere. They're all flipping me off. So it's gonna happen this year, though. And Jen, what was your superficial goal?

[Jen]

My superficial goal was to play a decent 18 holes of golf this year. I used to play as a kid. I played as a teenager in like father daughter tournaments with my dad and stuff like that. Actually played as a kid all the way through being a teenager and then was a typical teenager and didn't want to do anything my parents wanted me to do, so I stopped playing golf. But I feel like I have a natural swing and it's kind of one of those things that you have muscle memory on now.

[Jeff]

Why do you think you have a natural swing?

[Jen]

Because I learned it younger. You know what I'M saying, so it's not an awkward thing for me.

[Jeff]

I see.

[Jen]

You know what I'm saying? To swing a golf club feels natural. Does that make sense? Like, I don't know if I'm all. I would be all that good at it as an adult, but I think I have some muscle memory on it, so I would like to. I'd like to pick that back up again.

[Jeff]

And when you say play a decent round of golf, is that like under 100?

[Jen]

I guess so. I don't really know. I mean, but just to be able to get out there and play again. And now that it's getting a little bit nicer outside, I can start working on that goal.

[Melissa]

All right, Wendy.

[Wendy]

Mine is super superficial. Mine is actually. Yeah, mine's actually today an NFL player by the time next season starts and be in the stands when the whole football season gets underway. And right now it's my. It might not work out. So I'm going for brothers, cousins, nephew, nephews, relationships.

[Melissa]

It's only February. You got time. It's only February.

[Wendy]

That's true. The draft. If I don't have somebody by the draft, then I'm screwed.

[Jeff]

If you have a third cousin that is in the CFL or playing in the world football League or whatever, Absolutely.

[Melissa]

I'll take it. There's a new league coming in. Oh, yeah, the new league.

[Thrive Cosmetics Announcer]

I can do European football.

[Wendy]

Just come on.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

She don't care. She'll do rugby. At this point, if you're on a recreational rugby league that meets every other Saturday at Piedmont Park, I'll do slow pitch. Call her.

[Jeff]

If you're playing with a ball that roughly looks like a football, I do anything.

[Jen]

Right.

[Jeff]

That hasn't happened yet. And, Jeff, yours this year, I want

[Host (The Bird Show)]

to get on a game show.

[Melissa]

Oh, yeah, that's right.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

I want to be slumdog.

[Melissa]

Be slumdog.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yeah.

[Melissa]

And Melissa mine was to voice either in a cartoon or a game because I said I'm the resident geek on the show, and I love all that stuff. And I thought, well, if I'm in radio, why can't I figure out a way to get my voice on one of those things? So that was my superficial goal for this year, is to get into either, like I said, a cartoon or a game.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

If you pay attention to Melissa, she makes a lot of sound effects during the show.

[Melissa]

That's right. As the older I get. But yeah, no. And soon after. We talked about this earlier in the year, I did not realize that here in Atlanta, actually in Alpharetta, there is a Studio that is creating a game has been spending four years on this game called Global Agenda. And it's High Res Studios in Alpharetta. And so they are Burt show listeners. And they actually almost immediately offered and came in studio actually and offered me the chance to voice a character in this game, Global Agenda.

[Jeff]

Now, the first thing you said there, I was surprised that it took this long to do a game. Four years, you said.

[Melissa]

They've been working on it Four years. If you ever play a video game and this is an online with all those initials mmo, they're going to kill me because I don't have the initials.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Multiplayer.

[Melissa]

Yes. So it's starting out online and if you ever see any of these games and actually read the credits of a game, you will see, I mean, all these names that pop up because it takes that long for all the games are so intense and there's so much work that goes into it because you don't think about when you're playing it. All the scenery, all the movements that the characters do, all the levels, all

[Jen]

the actions there are for what, you know, if you do this, then comes this. Exactly.

[Jeff]

Even the smallest detail, like the shadows that follow the characters have to be perfect, you know.

[Melissa]

Exactly.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

I just thought there were video cameras in the land of Gnomes and you were. The gnomes were controlled by telepathic signals that came when you played things on your keyboard.

[Melissa]

That's the same story you were telling when you were drunk Saturday Night Joe. You know that, right?

[Jen]

No.

[Melissa]

Anyway, so I actually had a chance to visit High Res Studios. They invited me to their Alpharetta offices and had me come in and take a tour. And so I went into High Res and got to see all the guys that design. So there's like three different departments where you have the programmers that are putting the code in. Then you've got some art guys that are actually kind of molding these suits that the characters wear and kind of creating what they do. Then you have another kind of art area where if you ever play a video game, when you're going in between levels, there's almost like these little mini movies that play. And so there's actually different department of people who actually are technically making little mini movies so that they go into this game. And one of the places they sent me into was the. This huge room that's, you know, it's just this big empty room, but there's a grid on the floor and then there's almost like little cameras on all the corners of the room. And then there's a green screen. And so large cameras or like little itty bitty little cameras.

[Jeff]

Okay. Like webcam type deal.

[Melissa]

Yeah, little cameras.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

And this is the first time you've been in an empty room filled with webcams, right, Carter, we believe you.

[Melissa]

This was a new one in theirs I have not been in. So anyway, so this is the room where if you've ever watched any special effects movie or any, you know, behind the scenes of the people that have the suits on with the little golf ball.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Melissa]

So this is the room where you go in and you put the suit on and you have. And the little golf ball things are actually little sensors. And so those cameras are picking up only those sensors, nothing else. And so that's why you have to wear a black suit, is so that they can record your movement. So in the game, your character moves exactly like you do, or they have to base every character on an actual person. Because if you play a game now, it's pretty realistic. And so it's based on actual people. So their staff are the ones that they have based all the movements of all these characters on, you know, by them putting the suit on and just moving around in the studio. So the first meeting, that initial meeting was so that I could get a tour, so that I could talk to them about the different characters. Their idea for me is in this game, a lot of games, when you play, then you upgrade to buy things when you get certain points. Well, they have an actual area, an alleyway, where it's almost these stores where you go in and you talk to someone and purchase items in the store. And so I would be one of the shopkeepers. So in order to utilize my voice more and to have more personality into it, instead of a warrior, I'm actually going to be the person you have to come either buy a new vest from or a new weapon from, or they haven't really. They haven't made a decision.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Give us a line. Salberta vest.

[Melissa]

So anyway, so that. So we have to determine. Because we haven't determined that yet. And I'm not gonna audition for you now. So anyway, so there. So we have to determine that on what I'm gonna sell. But one of the things that they

[Host (The Bird Show)]

said, hello, I would like a vest, please.

[Melissa]

One of the things that. That is also in video games that I wasn't aware of, that if you know a certain code, you can make a character do certain things. And they have codes in there of, like, if you want to see them dance, if you want to see them do A handstand if you want to see them do whatever. Well, the beauty of high res and them being they're the creators of this global agenda. They can do whatever they want. And so their assignment.

[Jeff]

You better be real nice to those people.

[Melissa]

So their assignment for me it was to. Because I go actually do the voiceover work and do the suit work in March. So they're.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Would you like to see my sword?

[Melissa]

So their assignment for me was to figure out what things I wanted to do with these codes. Like, you know, what crazy things would I allow my character to do that somebody playing the game could actually make me do.

[Jeff]

So what can we make you do? Well, you don't know yet.

[Melissa]

I don't know yet. I mean that's, I'm certainly open. Suggestions from listeners.

[Jen]

What if you did like a.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Can you do a standing back.

[Jeff]

Yeah, the kid from earlier this morning. Can you lick your own eyes?

[Melissa]

They'd have to put one of those sensors on my tongue. And I'm not gonna tell you what I can do for.

[Jen]

What about the Ralph Macchio Karate Kid kit could do that.

[Melissa]

Anything. I can do anything.

[Jeff]

So you can suggest to them anything at all?

[Melissa]

Anything at all.

[Jeff]

Okay. Can I have their email address? Cause I would like to. I've got a couple of suggestions and I don't think that you'll. Okay, but I think we'll enhance the video experience. So you're not going to be a character that will die or kill people?

[Melissa]

No, but I will be a character that you can talk to. So any character can come in there and talk to me and. And so yeah, I'm happy to take melissa100atlanta.com I'm happy to take suggestions on what you think my character should do because I have opened myself up and I told them that I will take. I will incorporate suggestions from listeners in this game.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Please may I have a handful of nets?

[Jen]

Do you know what the name of your character is going to be?

[Melissa]

I do not. I do not know yet. But anybody who is a gamer, I think the next PC Gamer magazine actually has a two page article about global agenda. So they are launching. I believe they're scheduled to launch at the end of this year. So we came at the right time where they've been working on it for four years but they're getting ready to, to release the game.

[Jeff]

So Melissa is asking what would you like to see her do in this video game? And you can email her. I would suggest you carbon copy all of us. Hey, the bird show.

[Melissa]

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[Jeff]

Camille is on hold and she's ready to go. She wants to change the name of her two and a half year old.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Oh.

[Jeff]

Seems a little tardy to me.

[Jen]

Tardy, That's a fun word.

[Melissa]

I have not heard that word since, well, whenever.

[Jeff]

Ring the tardy bell. Yeah, but she says she's got good reasons. All right, let's hear Camille out here, shall we? Not judge till we hear. All right, Melissa. Rolling the eyes already.

[Melissa]

Okay, two and a half years old. Change your child's name.

[Jeff]

Hey, Camille. Good morning.

[Caller]

Hey, good morning, guys.

[Jeff]

So what's going on with your kid now, two and a half years old? You want to change his name?

[Caller]

No, she's only two. Actually, she's not two and a half.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Melissa]

Different. Sorry.

[Caller]

It's okay. And yeah, it's been eating me alive. Like I've been wanting to change her name for about six months actually. And I was hoping that the feeling would go away and it just happened. And I really don't know what to do. I don't know if it's gonna scar her. I've been trying to look online and find out information, and I can't find anything.

[Jeff]

Let's back up for a second. Let's back up. Why did you name the baby the name that you did? What is the baby's name? And why all of a sudden, like, even six months ago, why is it like, okay, this is just not working for us?

[Caller]

Well, I actually didn't name the baby. My husband and I had made a deal that if it was a boy, I got to choose a name, and if it was a girl, he got to choose the name. And I was super excited. I totally had the best name for a boy picked out, Gabriel Ryan. And I was really excited. And it was a girl, and so he decided on Lucia Ray. I was like, oh, that's nice. It actually kind of sounds like Gabriel Ryan. Like, it has the same tone to it, the same sophistication. And so I was okay with. And about six months ago, his sister, who lives in Washington state, came to visit, and we're not very close, so it wasn't like we had talked on the phone a lot, and she's like, you know, by the way, I just amazed that you let my husband Greg name the kid Lucia Ray. And I was like, yeah, well, it was, you know, you know, no big deal. And she's like, oh. She said, wow, you're so cool about it. I was like, cool about what? What do you mean, without what? Because I obviously had no idea what she was talking about, and it's because it was her. It was his ex fiance's name who. She broke up with him right before we got together.

[Jen]

Oh, okay.

[Jeff]

So did you. Did you know that there was an ex fiance even at that point?

[Caller]

No, I had no idea. You know, we were just. We're just the kind of couple that never. You know, he was kind of a jealous type, and he's like, I don't want to hear about your ex boyfriend. I don't want you to hear about mine. Like, let's just start fresh. Okay, that's cool. I can use that.

[Jeff]

How do you keep that from somebody, though? The. The only person that would propose that is somebody that has something in their past that they don't want to discuss.

[Jen]

Mm.

[Jeff]

How do you keep that?

[Caller]

How do I find out? I just thought he was being sweet and wanted to just move forward in our relationship.

[Jeff]

Wow. Okay. So he's engaged to this woman, and they were engaged for how long? How long was their relationship?

[Caller]

No, she didn't totally say. She was kind of like, oh, my God. Okay. I'm so sorry for Even saying anything. It's between you and Greg, if you want to talk about it. And it's like, okay, she's done her job.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

I don't want to get into this video.

[Jeff]

All right, okay.

[Melissa]

Judging him, not you.

[Jess]

Yeah.

[Caller]

He and I now have been screaming at the top of our lungs at each other because I won't call her by her name anymore. I can't.

[Jeff]

Wow. Yeah, that does change. Does that change things now?

[Melissa]

Yeah, I said I'm judging him, not you.

[Jen]

I say change it. I mean, your child's two, right? Yeah, she's not gonna remember.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

And you spent how long, you spent how long trying to get over it

[Caller]

the last six months? This is something that I'm really, I'm really struggling with.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

She has spent 25% of her child's life not being able to address her child by name. I say change it and do it yesterday.

[Jen]

Change it.

[Jeff]

I'm just thinking out loud here, cuz you don't have a lot of time to process it. But man, I mean, I've got an almost two year old now. He's 21 months and he knows his name. He comes to his name. There aren't a lot of things he recognizes, but his name is certainly one of them. So for me to start referring to him as something else, I don't think it has long lasting impact or anything like that, but it certainly could be confusing.

[Melissa]

But then I thought that what's the worst impact is if she keeps the name and the child thinks that mom resents her for something when it's not the child because she can't say the name without having a. You know, the child will absorb that negative energy the mom is going to give and then the child will take it personally and then it will have a complex and the child didn't do anything wrong.

[Jeff]

This may be a little more complicated than we initially thought. 404-74-01, Q100.

[Jen]

And if she does change it, she can tell her daughter many years later when she's older and can understand it, hey, you originally had this name and here's the reason why we changed it, whatever. And then she's kind of got a unique story to tell or something like that.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

When it's also the reason that your father and I aren't together anymore.

[Caller]

You know, But I mean, like that's the point that it's come down to. It's like he's.

[Jeff]

Yeah, that's horrible. Linda, you're on. Q100. Huh?

[Jess]

Why would you have change it? Change it yesterday they'll adjust to.

[Caller]

Because I have no children. If you started calling them, like Richard and then you change it to something, their middle name. They adjust, but I'll keep waiting.

[Jeff]

Do it now. She said, stephanie, you know what?

[Caller]

What about the social issues of me changing the name and then having to explain it to every person?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

I would explain it.

[Melissa]

I'd explain like you explain it to us.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Yeah, I would explain it. I wouldn't even explain it. I would make your husband explain it. If he doesn't think it's a big deal, I would say, you know what? Whatever. You said his name was Jerry or whatever you'd say, why don't you go talk to him and he'll explain, and then he'll have to say, well, and no, 1 0. Nobody will be answered.

[Melissa]

Oh, yeah, absolutely. This is when you're confident in your answer. Oh, you want to know why I changed the name?

[Caller]

Bah.

[Melissa]

Here's the reason. They were like, okay, sounds good.

[Jeff]

I would refer all questions regarding this subject to my husband.

[Melissa]

Yes.

[Jeff]

Hey, Stephanie. Go ahead. You're part of the Burt Show.

[Jess]

Hi.

[Caller]

I just wanted to say she should definitely change the name. Because as a girl, I would be really scarred and hurt that my father disrespected my mother in that way, and

[Jess]

I would want that name.

[Caller]

I would want her to change my name.

[Jeff]

That's a total difference.

[Jen]

Identified after that. I mean, that's. I mean, that becomes part of your story, how your parents named you. You know what I mean? You can think about. I mean, think about that. Like, where do they come up with the name? There's so much thought put into the name. There's so much. You know, for a lot of people, it's a family name or it's named you after my favorite great aunt or my favorite, you know. You know, or your great great grandmother or your great great grandfather. There's so much meaning behind it that this kid's gonna know the meaning behind it.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

He thinks about his ex fiance every time he says her name.

[Jeff]

Do that to her every single time. Change it.

[Melissa]

Change it. Change it today.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Honestly, I mean, I'm just saying, Bert,

[Bleacher Report Announcer]

like, I know it's.

[Jen]

I can tell you how. Go down, start at Social Security.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

It's a unique name, but, like the girl you dated, Chand Chandra or whatever.

[Jeff]

Even I forget her name, right?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

What's her name?

[Jeff]

I forget her name is Inconsequential.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Okay? Inconsequential. Every time you hear someone else named Inconsequential, don't you? For one second, she pops into your mind?

[Jeff]

Absolutely. There was. There's a reporter from Atlanta magazine that has the same name. They. It sounds a little bit different the way they pronounce it, but every time I see her name, I think of the X. Chandra.

[Jen]

Yes.

[Jeff]

Hey, Rachel, good morning. You're on Q100.

[Jess]

Good morning.

[Caller]

I just wanted to say I was three when I was adopted and my parents did change my name because they didn't. They wanted to have my. Their daughter with their own name. And I don't remember ever being called by my other name.

[Melissa]

So it didn't scar you.

[Jeff]

So what we're hearing here are the social ramifications of you not saying your daughter's name are going to be way more far reaching than you changing that name.

[Jen]

Do you have a new name picked out?

[Caller]

Well, I was going to call her Gabriella.

[Melissa]

Beautiful name.

[Jeff]

Sure.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Or you can name her.

[Melissa]

Was your ex boyfriend named Gabriel? Gabriel. Gabriel.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Why don't you name her after her father and call her a hole?

[Caller]

This is the next question. How do I possibly live with a man that is still passionate about another woman?

[Jeff]

Yeah, that's another question for another time. But that is an important one right there. I mean, the deception there and the fact that he packaged it in such a way to you as him saying, you know, I don't want to know. That's all in your past, right? Let's not go ahead and talk. What he really wanted to do was hide that he had an ex fiance.

[Melissa]

If things don't work out between you and you never, ever, ever tell your daughter exactly why, because she's going to feel like it's her fault that y' all didn't make it.

[Jen]

That's true.

[Caller]

Well, I'm hoping that we make it. I'm hoping that we just figure out why he has these feelings still. I don't know, maybe we won't make it.

I don't know.

I don't want to think about that

[Jeff]

at the time of the morning.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

I honestly think you should just to see what he does. I think you should pick out an ex boyfriend who has a name that can be modified to be a girl's name. And I think you should say to him, like, let's say you dated a guy named Jesse, right? That can go either way. Or Aaron. Aaron's a good name that can go boy or girl. And I think you could say, hey, you know what? I'm gonna name this Aaron after the guy that I dated my first three years of college.

[Melissa]

But you don't want your daughter to

[Host (The Bird Show)]

be no you don't really do it.

[Melissa]

Point of retaliation.

[Jeff]

You don't start talking.

[Host (The Bird Show)]

You don't really do it. You just do that to see how he genuinely responds. Because I guarantee you.

[Caller]

No, but I've done that. We've yelled about that. I said, well, what if I named him Cameron? Because I did it again, named her Cameron. And he's like, I don't care. The reason why I named her Lucia is because she was a wonderful woman and she was full of respect and honor and anyone would be lucky to have that name. Oh, that's a deal breaker.

[Jeff]

Oh, dude.

[Caller]

I mean, how many times can you

[Jeff]

whiff on the same ball?

[Host (The Bird Show)]

Jeez.

[Jen]

He's one of those guys that can turn around any argument into it being your fault. Right.

[Jeff]

He didn't do a very good job on this one because he kept messing it up all the way across the board.

[Jen]

Wow.

[Jeff]

Wow. Yeah, that's another issue there. Well, as far as the baby issue goes, everybody calling up saying, no worries, go ahead, change the name.

[Caller]

And that makes me feel better just knowing that people are on my side.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

How you handle it with your husband is a totally different situation.

[Jen]

I'd seek somebody else's help in figuring

[Caller]

that out, but the baby wants change his name too.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

Tool is a good one. Camille, thank you very much for calling.

[Jess]

Thanks, guys.

[Jeff]

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