The Bert Show – Episode Summary

Full Show PT 2: Tuesday, April 13 [Vault]

Broadcast Date: April 14, 2026
Hosts & Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, Dreama, Jen, Chelsea, Erin, Jason

EPISODE OVERVIEW

This episode is packed with The Bert Show’s typical lively humor, authentic banter, and segments that bring listeners into the personal and sometimes bizarre corners of their world. The main themes are:

• A deep-dive ghost investigation with Atlanta Ghost Hunters, featuring real audio clips from a supposedly haunted Marietta law office.
• A “Just Curious” neighborhood mystery resolved on-air.
• A “Love Lost and Found” escapade trying to reconnect a listener with a helpful stranger.
• A dramatic, comical reading of emails from an oblivious ex-girlfriend left behind while her boyfriend backpacked Europe.

SEGMENT 1: Atlanta Ghost Hunters—Spooky Investigations and EVP Clips

[01:31–15:20]

Introduction to the Ghost Hunters

• Guest ghost hunters Erin and Dreama join the crew, with Erin sharing her beginnings in paranormal investigation, growing up in a haunted house, and joining Andy’s team.
  • “I grew up in a house that I felt was haunted… we just kind of hit it off, and I’ve been doing it ever since.” – Erin [02:30]

Details of the Latest Investigation

• The team recently explored a historic law office in Marietta, GA, where the tenants found a tombstone—used for decades as… a trash storage pad.

  • “It was a tombstone. And it had been there for, like, 30 years before they realized this.” – Erin [05:12]
  • “They’ve been putting the trash on it.” – Dreama [05:19]

• Residents report doors opening, footsteps only entering, and an object (a globe) flung across the room.

  • “The globe was all the way across the room, and nobody was in there... had to have been, like, thrown.” – Erin [05:46]

EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomena) Audio Clips Presented

Clip 1: “Help!”

[07:03]

• Captured during a door-locking check in the library, the most active room.
  • “Help.” – Disembodied EVP, replayed [07:09]
  • Reaction: “That was pretty clear.” – Bert [07:13]
• The burial on the tombstone was named George; the team attempts communication:
  • “Sorry I put the trash on your tombstone, George.” – Dreama [08:00, joking]

Clip 2: “Want to go with me?”

[09:02]

• Captured in the empty globe room, with discussion about how much time is spent listening for tiny mysterious sounds.
  • “It kind of actually sounds to me like it has an accent of some sort.” – Erin [09:08]
  • “Honestly, I have listened to audio for two weeks solid. Probably like 48 to 60 hours.” – Erin [09:48]

Clip 3: “Should I give it to you?”

[12:04]

• Captured after psychic info that the spirit was waiting for something; the hosts strain to hear, agreeing on creepy vibes.
  • “You just have to listen... it says, should I give it to you?” – Erin [12:14]
  • “So she heard it in the room without having to replay.” – Dreama [12:41]
  • “Dang, dang, dang.” – Chelsea [13:28]

Clip 4: “We’re not dead at all.”

[14:08]

• The eeriest: an EVP stating, according to Erin, “We’re not dead at all.”
  • “That’s the second time something like this has come up.” – Dreama [14:39]
  • “Andy has told us before that some spirits don’t know that they’re dead.” – Bert [14:48]

SEGMENT 2: Just Curious – The Nosy Neighbor Mystery

[16:08–25:02]

The Set-Up

• Show explains “Just Curious”—listeners bring odd scenarios, and the hosts investigate what others are too shy to ask.
• This episode: Listener Erin calls about a neighbor who receives a non-husband male visitor at the exact same time, 2–3 times a week; rumors swirl—possibly an affair or something even wilder.

The Reveal

• Jason (the supposed “strange man”) calls in with an elegantly-written email, clearing up the confusion:
  • “Not to be a buzzkill, but the strange man... is actually her husband.” – Jason [20:35]
  • After hearing their story on air, he and his wife introduced themselves to “nosey Erin” to resolve it in person!

Notable Moments

• Jason’s deadpan recounting and the team’s laughter at how harmless the situation really was.
• “We think it’s hysterical.” – Jason, on the rumor that his wife is a masseuse/prostitute [23:05]
• “She just had this totally kind of, like, dumbfounded look. I don’t think she ever expected that to happen.” – Jason [23:13]
• Commentary on how neighborhood gossip spirals when facts are absent.

SEGMENT 3: Love Lost and Found – The Valet Called Ryan

[25:45–37:06]

The Story

• Listener Montez lost her nerve after a cute valet (Ryan) helped her out of a car breakdown in Buckhead on Father’s Day.
  • “He told me he was a starving artist, which is me. I’m the same thing. I’m a dancer...” – Montez [27:57]
• The team debates whether this qualifies as “lost and found” since she knows exactly where to find him but is too shy to go back.

Audience and Cast Reaction

• Intern Michelle is dispatched to the valet stand live on air to try to connect with Ryan and play Cinder-fella.
  • “We know where he is!” – Bert [32:06]
  • Debates about love, laziness, shyness, and destiny ensue in classic Bert Show fashion. Listeners call in to confirm the identity/location of Ryan and encourage Montez to contact him herself.

Fun Quotes

• “It’s a love lost and lazy!” – Chelsea [30:35]
• “Are you sure you love him before we do this, are you sure this is the man you want to marry?” – Jen [36:56]

SEGMENT 4: The Epic “Europe Backpacking” Ex-Girlfriend Email Meltdown

[37:34–46:24]

Segment Summary

• Bert recounts a viral video: a guy’s girlfriend unravels via email over two weeks, not knowing he’s out of the country with no phone access.
  • The video animates her increasingly frantic, angry, then self-justifying, then pleading messages against a backdrop of European vacation photos.
• The team reads each progressively wild email, delighting in the escalation.

Timeline Highlights & Quotes

• Day 1: “Hey doll. Me and the girls are gonna hit up Maddy tonight... You and the boys should come out too!” [39:42]
• Day 3: “WTF? Why are you not responding... I know you’re around. Your friend Jeremy is such a BSer...” [40:04]
• Day 5: “Was it just time to dump me? You could at least tell it to my face... We’re through. Don’t call me.” [40:58]
• Day 8: (No subject) “I hate you.” [42:02]
• Day 12: Subject: F U U U U U U U U U [42:17]
• June 10: “Remember that friend... the one I told you nothing ever happened with? Well... I... to show you I’m right.” [42:36]
• Later: “If you love me, you will delete every email I’ve sent... Do not read any other emails!” [45:24]
• After Mom reveals the truth: “JD, please, I’m begging you that when you get back you do not read any email but this one. We’ve all made mistakes while you’ve been away...” [45:50]

Final Reflection

• “Careful when you date passionate people because passion swings both ways. Sometimes they’ll love you, sometimes they’ll hate you. And when they hate you, boy, do they hate you.” – Video author, via Bert [46:20]
• “When you go to Europe for two weeks, leave your [expletive] phone on.” – Video author, via Bert [46:20]

MEMORABLE QUOTES & HUMOR

• “Historic is just another word for haunted.” – Jen [04:39]
• “Didn’t realize it was your resting place for eternity. My bad. Let me clean up those coffee grounds. And cat litter.” – Jen [08:10]
• “We usually try and just anything that we know... the guy’s name was George... Sorry I put the trash on your tombstone, George.” – Dreama [08:00]
• “That’s the second time something like this has come up. Because remember, there was an investigation a long time ago, ‘oh my god, they think we’re dead!’” – Dreama [14:39]
• “This is a new bit called Love, Love Found. And I’m scared and lazy.” – Jen [32:59]

TIMESTAMP GUIDE TO IMPORTANT SEGMENTS

| Topic/Segment | Timestamp (MM:SS) | |----------------------------------------------------------|----------------------| | Ghost Hunters intro & investigation setup | 01:31–06:00 | | Tombstone discovery & ghost stories | 04:45–06:14 | | EVP Clip 1 (Help) | 07:03 | | EVP Clip 2 (Want to go with me) | 09:02 | | EVP Clip 3 (Should I give it to you) | 12:04 | | EVP Clip 4 (We’re not dead at all) | 14:08 | | Neighborhood “Just Curious” setup | 16:08 | | Jason’s neighbor story email reveal | 20:04 | | Jason’s confrontation with Erin | 23:13 | | Love Lost and Found: Montez & the valet “Ryan” | 25:45–37:06 | | Multiple listeners call confirming Ryan’s workplace | 33:10–36:20 | | Dramatic reading of Europe trip ex-girlfriend emails | 37:34–46:24 |

THE BERT SHOW’S TONE

Playful, slightly irreverent, full of side chatter, laughter, and inside jokes. They regularly “rag” on each other, never skip the opportunity for a zinger, and invite listeners into the absurdities of everyday life—neighborhood spies, love missed connections, and techno-confused ghosts included.

This episode delivers classic Bert Show: relatable real-life drama, wild listener stories, and a crew eager to laugh at themselves and (gently) at you.