Full Show PT 2: Tuesday, August 4 [Vault]

Summary

The Bert Show – Full Show PT 2: Tuesday, August 4 [Vault]

Airdate: August 4, 2026

---

Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show immerses listeners in relatable moments from family milestones to personal insecurities—with the signature humor, warmth, and authenticity the crew is known for. Notable topics include a father grappling with his daughter’s entry into puberty, a woman seeking a date to make her ex jealous at an engagement party, candid confessions about jealousy in relationships, and stories about bizarre behavior on the road. Lively banter, candid listener calls, and the team’s willingness to get real make the episode equal parts funny and heartfelt.

---

Key Segments & Discussions

---

1. Dad Struggles with His Daughter Growing Up

[01:02–12:00]

• Carl’s Emotional Dilemma
  Producer Carl opens up about seeing his 9-year-old daughter need her first training bra, expressing surprise and sadness at this milestone.
  • “When I saw the bra, the training bra, and I saw the little girly bumps...that right there did it for me. …It’s like she’s not a baby anymore.” – Carl (Producer) [02:46]
• Men vs. Women’s Perspectives
  The crew discusses how puberty impacts parents differently; while mothers see their daughters becoming like them, dads worry about growing independence, boys, and lost innocence:
  • “My little girl's gonna be little forever.” – Wendy [03:09]
  • “For, I think, guys... daughters becoming more like mommy, and guys know what they've done to mommy, and they don't want anybody doing that to their daughter.” – Jeff [06:42]
• Listener Calls & Shared Experiences
  Callers share stories of early puberty and the complexities for both girls and their parents:
  • “I started my period when I was in the third grade. I was eight years old. …I’ve been bleeding for 20 years.” – Alex (Caller) [08:18]
  • Anecdotes include a father taping down his daughter's chest (“My dad…would tape my chest down...so that nobody could tell. …My mom had to get me a training bra.” – Alex [10:23]) and the emotional difficulty for fathers trying to stay connected as their daughters mature.
• Advice on Navigating Growing Up
  The team emphasizes the importance of continuing father-daughter communication through puberty despite discomfort:
  • “Your communication with her and continuing to have a close relationship…is very important. Instead of…it being like, ‘I'm too uncomfortable with this, I’m just going to…never talk about it.’” – Jen [09:38]

---

2. Finding a Jealousy-Inducing Date

[14:20–23:30]

• Alex’s Request for the Perfect Engagement Party Date
  Alex calls in about bringing a date to an engagement party where her ex (who broke up with her via email after three and a half years together) will appear with a new girlfriend.
  • "So I need a date. He's gonna bring her. I just want to show him that I can do better." – Alex [14:51]
  • The team jokingly discusses the strategy, prioritizing a “really good looking dude” and playfully debates if her date needs to be straight or gay, and capable of acting affectionate.
• Listener Participation
  Listeners call in to volunteer or make suggestions for Alex’s ideal date, including “Phillip,” a self-assured, physically fit gay man.
  • “Well, I’m gay, so we’re forced to work out.” – Phillip [21:03]
• Logistics and Expectations
  The team prepares to post Alex’s picture and requirements, inviting the community to help find her the perfect “jealousy factor” date.

---

3. Candid Talk: Jealousy in Relationships

[25:59–36:15]

• Wendy’s Confession
  Wendy admits to unexpected jealousy in her otherwise healthy relationship because her boyfriend’s best friends are women and he spends a lot of time with them.
  • “I have zero reason to be jealous, but I find these pangs of jealousy...and just be quiet about it.” – Wendy [26:06]
• Carl & Burt Relate
  Carl shares his own struggle with jealousy over his wife’s new, good-looking male friend, and how it tested the boundaries of their marriage:
  • “She basically said to me, ‘This guy's not going anywhere. We're just friends. I'm allowed to have guy friends just the same way you're allowed girlfriends.’ The problem is, I've never even had the thought…of starting a friendship with a girl outside my marriage.” – Carl [29:00]
• Listener Opinions & Debate
  Listeners weigh in on if men and women can be “just friends”—with some adamant it never works out and others advocating for trust and boundaries. Key points:
  • “I completely do not believe in opposite sex friendship. …If you don’t...prevent it, it cannot accumulate to anything else.” – Maria (Caller) [31:21]
  • “I think you can have… [an] opposite sex relationship and it be a friendship because I had a best guy friend. But I think it’s important that he introduce you to all of his girlfriends so you don’t feel insecure…” – Burt [32:07]
  • “It almost felt to me like he was providing something for her…that I wasn’t providing… I still don’t like that at all.” – Carl [32:47]

---

4. ‘Weirdest Things Seen While Driving’

[38:35–42:55]

• Unusual Roadside Behavior
  The cast and listeners recount memorable or bizarre things witnessed in other vehicles:
  • “The person…was punching herself in the head. …Obviously in frustration about something.” – Jeff [39:07]
  • Watching porn on car TVs meant for children, reading hardcover books at the wheel, using eyelash curlers while driving (“Going down the highway? No, no, no…that’s dangerous on so many levels.” – Jen [42:30])
  • The segment uses humor to underline the dangers and absurdities found in everyday life on the road.

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “It’s traumatic. It’s super traumatic for a daddy.” – Jeff (re: daughters growing up) [04:05]
• “I encourage her to talk to me…I encourage her to talk to me. It’s just hard when I go into the room by myself and just deal with it.” – Carl (Producer) [11:33]
• “I want him to not be scared to talk.” – Alex (on what she’s looking for in a date) [16:58]
• “If anything was gonna happen between him and any of these women, it would have already happened.” – Jen [30:35]
• “I just buried it for a while. …I thought I was at peace with it, but I just now realized I’m not at peace with it.” – Carl [36:02]

---

Episode Highlights

• Raw Parental Vulnerability: Carl’s confession about the emotional impact of his daughter hitting puberty connects with listeners, inspiring a string of candid calls.
• Community Engagement: The “find a date for Alex” segment spotlights the show’s sense of fun and collaboration with listeners.
• Open Relationship Talk: Discussions on jealousy and friendship boundaries, with multiple viewpoints and personal experiences from both the cast and callers, offer practical wisdom and honesty.
• Banter on Life’s Oddities: The amusing swap of “seen on the road” stories brings levity and universal relatability.

---

Important Timestamps

• Family & Puberty Talk: 01:02 – 12:00
• Date for Engagement Party: 14:20 – 23:30
• Relationship Jealousy: 25:59 – 36:15
• Weird Roadside Behavior: 38:35 – 42:55

---

This episode demonstrates why The Bert Show remains a go-to for listeners seeking both laughter and the comfort of shared experiences. From the poignant to the ridiculous, the stories and conversations flow candidly, always with an open invitation for the audience to join in.

Transcript

[Burt]

Oh, I have had no luck lately. Wait. Lady luck Britsky. I got you. I've had so much luck on spinquest.com

[Alex]

they have all of my favorite games,

[Burt]

slot games, live, blackjack, craps and bubble craps. You can even get a 30 coin

[Alex]

pack for just 10 bucks.

[Burt]

10 bucks for 30. I'm headed over to spinquest.com right now. Spinquest is a free to play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details. Forget whatever plans you have this weekend because you're staying at home and playing on spinquest. And there's never been a better time to sign up than right now. New users get $30 coin packs for just $10. All the table games you love with hundreds of slot games and real cash Prizes. That's at spinquest.com S P I N

[Carl]

Q U-E-T.com Spinquest is a free to

[Burt]

play social casino void where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details. It's the Birch Show.

[Jeff]

We have Carl's at Mike Music because we got to bring Carl in here. And this is. This might be a guy thing, but I read this topic that he has for the show and my heart broke a little bit.

[Jen]

Your heart broke?

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Carl]

That's funny.

[Jeff]

And I know it's a guy thing.

[Jen]

I think it's a dad thing.

[Jeff]

I'm not a dad, though. I mean, it's not.

[Jen]

He's admitted.

[Jeff]

So Carl is stepping out of his master control for the phone screening room to come seek counsel from the comfort that is the Burt show.

[Carl (Producer)]

And it's serious too, y'. All. Serious business. My daughter the other day. No, last weekend.

[Jeff]

You have three kids.

[Carl (Producer)]

Have three kids. Have an older daughter who. Who just turned nine. And I have my four year old daughter and then my little dude in the middle. But last weekend I saw my wife in the bathroom with my 9 year old trying on. I don't even know if it was a training bra. I mean, what size do you get at that age?

[Jen]

Yeah, that's a training bra, baby.

[Burt]

Girls growing up, what was your first reaction, really?

[Carl (Producer)]

My first reaction was, why is my wife doing that? She don't really need that. You know, it was like, why is she pushing that on tour? You know I'm right.

[Wendy]

Like, I think a mama will do that.

[Jen]

That's when they start. That's when they start sprout.

[Wendy]

And the daughters ask for that too.

[Jen]

The daughter's excited.

[Jeff]

Not Carl's girl. Carl's girl's six years old. Forever.

[Carl (Producer)]

I know, right? Four year old. And the Thing is, she's like real small and you started seeing a little like the little bumps come up.

[Jen]

Yeah, little knit bumps.

[Carl (Producer)]

That right there. Oh my gosh. That right there did it for me.

[Jen]

And that's why she needs a training bra.

[Carl (Producer)]

That right there did it for me.

[Wendy]

What is like, what's the emotion? Can you define it?

[Carl (Producer)]

It's like, well, I mean, really, my little ba. Really? It's like she's not a baby anymore, of course. And it's like that innocence, you know, like, okay, she's gonna start looking at boys. She's gonna just everything, man. Just everything that comes along with it.

[Jeff]

It's adulthood. It's like that is an outward.

[Jen]

It's the on ramp to puberty.

[Burt]

It's the word puberty.

[Wendy]

You're like, my little girl's gonna be little forever.

[Carl (Producer)]

Serious, man.

[Jeff]

It's like guys don't have it so much. I mean, maybe like shaving, like getting whiskers on their face, you know.

[Wendy]

But like that comes so much later though.

[Jeff]

And I think it's. Cause when I read that, Carl, like I.

[Carl (Producer)]

You felt me?

[Jeff]

I felt it because I don't even have kids or a daughter or anything.

[Jen]

You said off air your heart broke.

[Jeff]

Yes, because next thing you. Cause I know what guys are like.

[Carl (Producer)]

Yeah. And I could appreciate you, Jeff, by even saying that, man. Just for you to be able. Just to understand where I was coming from. And Jeff said it so randomly. He brought it out the blue. And for him to say that his heart broke, I was like, oh, you feel me, dude, I'm serious. Because when you see the little bumps on everything, the little training bra. Okay, I could still. Cause she had a little Tweety bird training bra back in when she was 4. I let her play with it. Yeah, whatever. But now she needs it. And just to see the little bumps, that's just. I don't. That's hard to swallow.

[Jeff]

It's traumatic. It's super traumatic for a daddy. We're talking to Carl, who is one of the producers on the show, about his daughter who's getting all grown up,

[Wendy]

nine year old girl and she's got her first bra.

[Carl (Producer)]

But you know what though? Really the big thing is that when I saw the bra, the training bra and I saw the little, little girly bumps or whatever. Really? What? Really kind of.

[Jeff]

I think Fergie calls them lovely lady bumps.

[Carl (Producer)]

But really the whole thing is. I think it's the. That who knows what day she's going to come on a period. That's real.

[Jen]

I think that's that's why. That's way down the line.

[Burt]

No, sometimes it's ten.

[Jen]

Really?

[Wendy]

Ten years old grade.

[Carl (Producer)]

Really?

[Jen]

Fifth grade.

[Burt]

You, My sister.

[Wendy]

Really?

[Jen]

It's the hormones in the milk.

[Wendy]

It is. That's what you always hear. Cows.

[Jen]

Yeah, because it's usually like 11 and 12, right.

[Burt]

Fifth and sixth grade. That's the age range, though. It's fifth and sixth grade.

[Wendy]

What grade is your daughter in, Carl?

[Carl (Producer)]

She's in the fourth. Going to the fifth next year.

[Jeff]

I know. So growing up and when do boyfriends start calling the house?

[Carl (Producer)]

Never. I don't ever get through my life.

[Wendy]

6th and 7th grade. Boys will start calling you.

[Carl (Producer)]

I don't have to wor. I'm not even worried about that.

[Jeff]

I just write that down. I just had the vision of, like, some squeaky voice guy, like. And then, you know, Carl opens the door with big. Can I help you? Hello, M. And Carl just giving him like that.

[Jen]

How young is it?

[Jeff]

I'm.

[Carl (Producer)]

Open the door. Like a lion.

[Burt]

Get out of here.

[Carl (Producer)]

Like a dog. Just bark him out. Bark him away from.

[Wendy]

From what we learned earlier this morning, boys will just text and Facebook her. They won't actually ever call and ask her out, or they actually won't ever show her.

[Jeff]

She got a cell phone yet?

[Carl (Producer)]

In person, she's starting to ask. And that's the reason why, because I know little stuff starts creeping through the lines. You know, when you get a little cell phone, little text message from little.

[Wendy]

When are you gonna let her have one snotty nose?

[Carl (Producer)]

Kids dirty a cell phone. When she starts going out on her own. You know, when I'm not.

[Jeff]

Safety.

[Carl (Producer)]

Yeah, for safety reasons. Things like that.

[Jeff]

Hey, Renee. Welcome to the bird show.

[Alex]

Hey, guys. Love the show. Hey, Carl. I call Carla quite a lot, but my little girl's eight and a half, and she's pushing it. Mommy, we got to go. Mommy, we got to go. Get me, you know, a grow bra, training bra, whatever they call them. And she's just at the little bump stage, too, but it's adorable. I mean, this is a big thing for her. So excited.

[Jen]

Yeah, she's excited.

[Alex]

Go with it.

[Jen]

Yeah, I remember. I thought, yeah, it was so exciting.

[Jeff]

It's different, though, for girls and guys, because girls, like mommy is like, the daughter's becoming more like mommy.

[Jen]

Well, mom understands what she's feeling.

[Jeff]

And for, I think, guys. Daughters becoming more like mommy. And guys know what they've done to mommy, and they don't want anybody doing that to their daughter.

[Carl (Producer)]

That's exactly what it is. Because you Know what? Guys start looking, and when they start looking, they started thinking and all that, you know, I don't care how old the little dude.

[Jeff]

You guys are, so. Women are so lucky. They don't think, like, know what guys think about is not really.

[Carl (Producer)]

Oh, yeah.

[Jen]

Well, we're on the Birch show, and that's all the conversation we have all the time. So we're still trying to figure out what guys are thinking, and especially you scared once when.

[Jeff]

Hey, Rhonda.

[Jen]

Jeff reveals it.

[Jeff]

What's going on?

[Alex]

Yeah, I just want to let the call know. Yes, it does happen at 10 because it happened to me and it happened at church.

[Carl (Producer)]

Wow.

[Carl]

Oh, yeah.

[Jen]

That's a whole other conversation. So you started at 10?

[Alex]

Yes.

[Jen]

Really? You poor thing.

[Carl (Producer)]

Wow.

[Alex]

And at 10, I was not wearing the training bra. I was wearing a grown woman's bra.

[Burt]

Same with my sister.

[Wendy]

Are you serious? I'm serious.

[Burt]

It's different with different people. I mean, I started in sixth grade. That's like 10, 11 years old.

[Carl (Producer)]

Can I ask you, how are you big now? Like the early. Does it start? Does it mean how big you'll be or.

[Jeff]

I cut her off accidentally.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Jen]

I had a friend who start because we felt bad for the girls that started first. And there was a friend of ours. Yeah. Who started a year before everybody else.

[Jeff]

And apparently we've inadvertently launched into a game of premier period poker because Heather is now joining us.

[Jen]

Well, I just wanted to tell. I want to finish that thought as telling Carl that usually the size of the breasts indicated at least. And Wendy, tell me if I'm wrong, but the size of the breast indicated how mature she was and she was about to start.

[Jeff]

Hey, honest Heather. Welcome to the show.

[Alex]

Hi. How are you guys?

[Burt]

We're well.

[Jeff]

We're all good. Carl's a little sweaty.

[Alex]

Yeah, Carl, I understand. I started my period when I was in the third grade. I was eight years old. What?

[Wendy]

Eight?

[Jen]

Oh, my goodness, you're so.

[Wendy]

Baby.

[Alex]

Yeah, I've been. I've been bleeding for 20 years.

[Jen]

Oh, God, guys, I can't handle this conversation. You poor thing.

[Burt]

That line was hysterical.

[Wendy]

That's great. Wow.

[Jen]

I've been bleeding for.

[Jeff]

Hey, Liz. Welcome to the show. We lose Liz. We lost Liz.

[Jen]

She's laughing at the last comment.

[Wendy]

So curious. Carl, as a dad, as your daughter becomes this, you know, from this, your baby, you know, she'll always be your baby, but, like, she, you know, is growing up, how do you plan to sort of stay in touch with her and not just let it be her? She goes to mom now. You know, like, how do you get over your discomfort with the bra thing or, you know, starting the period thing or whatever, and still stay as close with her as you are now when she becomes a little woman?

[Carl (Producer)]

That's a good. That's a real good question, because I have a hard time trying to. Have a hard time trying to find that balance. But what I've learned is because when she had the little Tweety Bird bra when she was 4, playing with it, I brought it to her attention, and I recognized that she kind of got upset with me, so I recognized that, okay, this is what she wants.

[Alex]

So.

[Carl (Producer)]

So I vent to my wife and I leave her alone.

[Jen]

But I think what Jen is saying, and tell me if I'm interpreting this right, because you are the male influence in her life and what. How her relationship with you will define the men that she dates in her life. So I think that your. No pressure, though, but it's the truth. And I think that your communication with her and continuing to have a close relationship with her is very important. Instead of it being like, I'm too uncomfortable with this, I'm just going to, you know, leave the conversation or never talk about it.

[Jeff]

Would you guys believe me if I was about to pick up a phone call from a woman who said that her dad taped her boobs down?

[Alex]

What?

[Jen]

I'd believe that.

[Jeff]

Hey, Kim.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Jeff]

How are you?

[Alex]

I'm good. How are you guys?

[Jeff]

So what did.

[Wendy]

What happened?

[Jeff]

Father Purvis do, right?

[Alex]

My dad, actually, my dad, he was a cop, and so I know across going through, my dad freaked out when I started getting little lady lumps, and behind my mom's back for, like, two weeks, he would tape my chest down and so that nobody could tell. And then my mom found out, and she had to go get me a training bra. And, yeah, usually if you start developing early, it does determine the size. I'm 24 now and pretty big. I started wearing training bras at, like, 8 and 9 around that time.

[Jeff]

Carl, I thought we were gonna get help for you, and you're just sweating more.

[Carl (Producer)]

My baby gonna have a nice rack, huh?

[Wendy]

Now, don't go all Billy Ray Cyrus on us. What are you, Joe Simpson?

[Jeff]

I. Becky, can you help Carl?

[Alex]

Yeah. All I know is that my daughter's in third grade, and I am her teacher's homeroom mom. And she said that two of her girls, two of the little girls have already started.

[Jen]

At what grade again?

[Alex]

Third grade.

[Wendy]

Wow.

[Jen]

Those poor things. I mean, you can't help it, obviously, but that's tough to be first.

[Jeff]

Yeah.

[Wendy]

Or last.

[Jen]

First or last for a girl is very hard.

[Carl (Producer)]

Yeah, boys too. And the thing I don't want to sound like as if I'm too crazy over it, but I encourage her to talk to me. Don't get it. I don't want you all to get it wrong, but I encourage her to talk to me. It's just hard when I go into the room by myself and just deal with it.

[Burt]

Yeah, I'm sure the so cute.

[Wendy]

You're such a good dad, Carl.

[Carl (Producer)]

My baby.

[Jen]

Here Bird show this episode is brought to you by Vinted. Hey, it's Cassie. And this is your heads up that you're probably sitting on a fat stack of cash and you don't even realize it, y'.

[Alex]

All.

[Jen]

I took a look at my closet the other day, like truly looked at it and I realized I probably don't wear half of it. It's just sitting there taking up space and guilt tripping me every time I buy a new piece of clothing, reminding me that oh, I'm running out of closet space and I have all these beautiful clothes I never ever wear. And it's become this weird pain point in my life. And then I found vented. Vinted is a secondhand app that makes it easy for everyday people like you and me to sell pre loved fashion and earn some extra money. Vinted was the motivation I needed to clean out my closet, and I'm betting it's the same for you. So picture this. You use Vinted now. You've got a less cluttered closet, a refreshed wardrobe with new pieces that you don't feel guilty about, and you made money. It's a win, win, win. And the extra nice part is that listing items on Vinted is quick and simple. And once an item sells, Vinted creates the prepaid shipping label for you. So if you're ready to clean out your closet and make some extra money, download the Vinted app for free and start listing. With no seller fees, you keep every dollar you earn. And for a limited time, you can enjoy free shipping in the US on Vinted. Can't wait to see what y' all are selling.

[Burt]

This episode sponsored by Homebase. Homebase is built for small businesses trying to do it all. The neighborhood coffee shop, the local gym, the family run restaurant. With Homebase, you can schedule your team, track time, run payroll, and manage hiring from one easy app so you can spend less time chasing timesheets and more time running the business your customers love. More than 150,000 small businesses already use Homebase. To keep their teams on track, start free@join homebase.com Homebase built for small businesses that do it all. Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Now, I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited Premium Wireless for $15 a month is back.

[Carl (Producer)]

So I thought it would be fun

[Burt]

if we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal. So there goes my big idea for the commercial.

[Carl (Producer)]

Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment

[Wendy]

of $45 for 3 months, $90 for

[Jen]

6 months or $180 or 12 month plan required. $15 per month equipment equivalent to taxes and fees.

[Wendy]

Extra initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes.

[Burt]

Me slow when network is busy.

[Wendy]

See Terms.

[Jeff]

The Birch Show.

[Carl]

All right, so we get this email a couple of days ago, and it is from a Birch show listener that is looking for a date to a wedding. But not any date, okay? Because the stakes are high here. Hey, Alex. Good morning. You're on the Burt Show.

[Alex]

Hi. Good morning. Good morning.

[Carl]

How are you today?

[Alex]

I'm all right. How are y'? All?

[Carl]

Good.

[Jeff]

Good.

[Carl]

All right. How can we help you?

[Alex]

Okay, so it's not a wedding, it's an engagement party. The wedding's next year.

[Carl]

Okay.

[Alex]

Okay, so my ex will be there and.

[Wendy]

I'm sorry, ex boyfriend or ex husband?

[Alex]

Ex boyfriend.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Alex]

My ex boyfriend will be there. We broke up seven months ago, roughly. Bad breakup. Months later, he gets a girlfriend. Still has a girlfriend. So I need a date. He's gonna bring her. I just want to show him that I can do better.

[Jeff]

Who broke up with who?

[Alex]

He broke up with me via email.

[Carl]

Oh, come on, man. This goes along with our conversation last week.

[Jeff]

Just email you? Ttyl.

[Carl]

This goes along with our conversation about dudes having a man up, man.

[Wendy]

He emailed you.

[Carl]

You can't email or text something like that. You gotta do it the old fashioned way and meet them, you know, him straight in the eye. And you got to do it that way. Sucks.

[Wendy]

How long were we all together?

[Alex]

Three and a half years.

[Wendy]

Oh, that makes it worse.

[Carl]

Coward. Coward.

[Wendy]

You got to be glad you're not with that dude.

[Alex]

I am. I am.

[Carl]

So really what we need to do is find a guy that is just on first impression, just, I mean, a really good looking dude. So your ex is immediately going, oh, my God. Alex is doing great.

[Alex]

Right?

[Jeff]

Do you care if. Do you care if the guy is gay or straight? No, because you could go like, I'm thinking like that Calendar that Richie Arpino does every year.

[Burt]

Oh, yeah,

[Alex]

April.

[Jeff]

Yeah, you can use that thing almost as a catalog. Just go through there, pick out the one you want.

[Carl]

Here is Kelly with a suggestion. Hey, Kelly. Good morning. You're on the Bert Show.

[Alex]

Hey, I've got such a great idea. How about Dolvett?

[Carl]

That might work. All right. My friend Dolvett's a fairly decent looking dude.

[Jeff]

Do you care if he wears sunglasses all the time? Regardless of the illumination in the sky?

[Carl]

What exactly are you just looking for?

[Alex]

Hot.

[Carl]

Right?

[Alex]

Right. Yes.

[Carl]

Is there going to be any interaction between your ex and this guy, or is this. Can. Can this be somebody that looks really hot and just not have to talk at all?

[Alex]

No, I want him to talk. I want him to not be scared to talk.

[Carl]

There goes Dolvett.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Jen]

I think he's

[Carl]

all right. Because that's important. Because, yeah, if. If your ex comes up, you want him to be impressed. Not only is this dude hot, but he's also got something upstairs.

[Jen]

Right.

[Wendy]

Well, we have to be able to figure out, like, what's in it for the guy, because to give up a Saturday night and go with a total stranger to the engagement party, like, there's gotta be something in it for him.

[Carl]

I can tell you one thing, because I had Tracy send a picture of Alex because I knew this is what it was gonna boil down to for guys as well. Can I see a picture of what I gotta hang out with? And Alex spells her name A, L, Y, X. So I knew immediately she was gonna be good looking. And the photo came in today. And what's in it for guys is you're hanging out with a really pretty girl for the whole night. That I can tell you. So she passes that test. What else, though?

[Alex]

I don't know.

[Burt]

Where is this engagement party? Like, what are you guys going to be doing?

[Alex]

It's at a friend's house, so it's going to be, like, low key, kind of casual.

[Jen]

Do they have to travel far to get there? I mean, like, is it at metro Atlanta or is it outside the perimeter?

[Alex]

Oh, no, it's, like, around Kennesaw.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Carl]

What, like, you know the group that's going to be there better than we do. So give us some idea of, like, topics that might come up. Is this a political group or is this a. More of a pop culture group? What are we looking for?

[Alex]

No, not political. No, I'm sorry.

[Wendy]

What's the average age range of the crowd?

[Alex]

Late 20s.

[Wendy]

Okay. Kennesaw, late 20s. You'll just be hanging out. What about?

[Alex]

I mean, having food, drinking.

[Carl]

Pretty light night, it sounds like.

[Wendy]

Can you pick up dinner? I'm just trying to think of something else to throw in the pot.

[Carl]

There's got to be something for the dude. Although I'll tell you what. Really long way.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Carl]

What's that?

[Jen]

Ya.

[Jeff]

I was gonna say. Well, not if. It's like. If the guy we pick out is a great looking gay dude, then he doesn't care how cute she is.

[Wendy]

Right?

[Jen]

And then, I mean, it's an engagement party, so. I mean, hanging out with pot at a boring engagement party. No offense.

[Carl]

There is Paul. Good morning, Paul. You're on Q100.

[Alex]

Hey guys, how's it going?

[Carl]

Good, how are you?

[Alex]

Hey, you gotta add one more element to this, okay? You gotta have somebody who can act a little bit because they gotta act the part too. They can't just look the part and talk a little bit. They gotta act the part. I'm not saying they got to be like all all over each other, but you know, they. They gotta, you know, kiss once or twice or something. I mean, it's gotta look like. Like they're actually with each other.

[Carl]

It's gotta be believable to the ax or it's not gonna work.

[Wendy]

We should ask our friend who does the head. The head lean. Wouldn't it be good?

[Burt]

Oh, yeah.

[Wendy]

Okay. Wendy and I have to discuss off the air, but we have a cute friend that we think might work.

[Jeff]

But what's the head lean thing?

[Wendy]

It was just something I needed to tell Wendy so she knew who I was talking about.

[Jen]

Shut up.

[Jeff]

Sorry, girls, Girl talk.

[Carl]

Here is Philip. Good morning, Phillip. You're on Q100.

[Alex]

Hey, good morning.

[Carl]

Hello, sir. How are you?

[Alex]

We're doing wonderful. How are y'? All?

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Carl]

What's going on?

[Alex]

Well, first I wanted to find out y'. All. When I cut off the radio, y' all were talking about the age range. What is the age range she's looking for? Anywhere. Late 20s, early 30s will work.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Alex]

I'm 25. Is that too young? No,

[Carl]

no. At the risk of sounding desperate, no.

[Alex]

I mean, I don't know if I meet the standards. I mean, if y' all, we could do a quick interview.

[Wendy]

Aren't you good looking?

[Alex]

I mean, I think so. I could give y'. All. I don't really have any pictures I could send, but somebody could look me up on Facebook and you could get a little run through.

[Burt]

Okay.

[Carl]

What's the celebrity you most look like?

[Alex]

Somebody.

[Jeff]

I'm a guy.

[Alex]

I don't Know how to answer that question? You got me there.

[Wendy]

How tall are you?

[Alex]

About 5:10. Yeah, that's key. He needs to be tall.

[Wendy]

Do you work out?

[Jeff]

Sorry?

[Alex]

Do I work out? Yeah. Well, I'm gay, so we're forced to work out.

[Jen]

You have a higher physical standard, though.

[Jeff]

You get kicked out of the gay club.

[Burt]

And if you're a guy, where else

[Wendy]

are you gonna meet anybody if you don't go to the gym?

[Alex]

Exact.

[Carl]

All right, so we have gay. So as a stereotype, I'm gonna say that you're good looking, dude. And you probably know a little bit something about fashion also, obviously.

[Alex]

Well, they'll take away our car.

[Burt]

Okay.

[Carl]

Alex, do you have any problem at all about your date being gay?

[Alex]

No. I don't know how well I can pull off straight. Well, I used to be engaged, so I think I can pull off the straight card if it was necessary.

[Jen]

I hear a hesitation because I think she. She may be looking for potential, you know, somebody to go out with again if it works out.

[Jeff]

Well, I think the bigger question is Philip. Is that his name? Philip, do you have any reservations being a gay man and going to Kennesaw?

[Alex]

Well, that was an obstacle at first. I think we get to a point,

[Carl]

Alex, why don't we do this? Why don't I get producer Tracy on the phone with you after the show today? We will post your picture. We will also post exactly the requirements that you're looking for for this weekend. And then we'll also put. If you're interested, call back at 6:45 in the morning. And maybe we'll have a couple of dudes lined up for you tomorrow morning to narrow the search.

[Alex]

Okay.

[Carl]

Does that sound okay?

[Alex]

Yeah, sounds great.

[Carl]

Is there anything else I'm missing here? I don't feel like I still have a very good snapshot of exactly what you're looking for, though.

[Jeff]

What's your time frame? Like, how long do you want them to invest in that evening?

[Alex]

Just as long as the party.

[Jeff]

Is it like six? Is it a party? Is it a group that starts at 7pm and ends in 2am or is it a group that starts at 8pm and by 10:30 everybody's doing their own thing?

[Alex]

No, it could. It could go later.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Carl]

Okay.

[Jeff]

That's important.

[Carl]

All right, so, Alex, we'll post your picture. I'll have producer Tracy get on the phone with you. Just do a little description of exactly what you're looking for. And we'll have guys call in over the next couple of days. It's not this weekend.

[Alex]

No, no, no, no.

[Carl]

All right, so we have some time here.

[Alex]

Yeah, we have time.

[Carl]

Okay, Alex.

[Alex]

All right, great. Thank you.

[Carl]

Between everybody we know and the virtual community, I think we'll get you all hooked up. Okay.

[Alex]

All right, great. Thank you.

[Carl]

All right, thanks. Yeah. This has got to be a special dude because we're really just going for jealousy factor here.

[Jen]

Yes.

[Wendy]

And somebody who's going to be, like, affectionate with her, too.

[Jeff]

The Bird show

[Jen]

this episode is brought to you by Vinted. Hey, it's Cassie. And this is your heads up that you're probably sitting on a fat stack of cash and you don't even realize it, y'.

[Wendy]

All.

[Jen]

I took a look at my closet the other day, like, truly looked at it, and I realized I probably don't wear half of it. It's just sitting there taking up space and guilt tripping me every time I buy a new piece of clothing, reminding me that, oh, I'm running out of closet space and I have all these beautiful clothes I never, ever wear. And it's become this weird pain point in my life. And then I found Vinted. Vinted is a secondhand app that makes it easy for everyday people like you and me to sell pre loved fashion and earn some extra money. Vinted was the motivation I needed to clean out my closet, and I'm betting it's the same for you. So picture this. You use Vinted now you've got a less cluttered closet, a refreshed wardrobe with new pieces that you don't feel guilty about, and you made money. It's a win, win, win. And the extra nice part is that listing items on Vinted is quick and simple. And once an item sells, Vinted creates the prepaid shipping label for you. So if you're ready to clean out your closet and make some extra money, download the Vinted app for free and start listing. With no seller fees, you keep every dollar you earn. And for a limited time, you can enjoy free shipping in the US On Vinted. Can't wait to see what y' all are selling.

[Carl]

One number can save your round. So when the pressure's on, don't guess. Bushnell Golf gives serious golfers the confidence to pull the right club. With rangefinders, GPS devices, and launch monitors trusted by 98.1% of pros from the Tour V7, shift to the Pro X3 and Launch Pro. Bushnell Golf is built for precision you

[Burt]

can feel on every shot.

[Carl]

Shop direct at Bushnell Golf for the widest selection, exclusive offers, and free shipping. When the pressure's on trust, the number trusted by the pros. Bushnell golf visit bushnellgolf.com today.

[Burt]

That's B U S H N E

[Carl]

L L g o l f.com hi,

[Burt]

Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Are you looking for a beach read this summer? May I suggest your big wireless bill?

[Carl (Producer)]

It's got suspense, mystery, a slightly flat

[Burt]

emotional arc, and a shocking twist where you realize you've been overpaying the entire time. Fortunately, though, Mint's story is better. Every plan $15 a month, even unlimited.

[Carl (Producer)]

That's it.

[Burt]

Happy ending, zero tears.

[Carl (Producer)]

Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment

[Jen]

of $45 for three months, $90 for six months or $180 for a 12 month plan. Required $15 per month equivalent taxes and fees extra initial plan term only greater than 50 gigabytes. Me slow when it works.

[Burt]

Busy See Terms the Bird show.

[Wendy]

So I have this sort of odd jealous streak that I'm discovering in myself that I didn't realize that I had. And it's because it came up a couple of weeks ago. And I think it's really because my boyfriend and I have been together about maybe six months now and things are going really great. And I have zero reason to be jealous, but I just have this jealous streak. And I think it's because I'm trying to figure out where it comes from. And I think it's because he works with a lot of women and like constantly a lot of women, like always around him all the time. And I think because of that, some of his closest friends are women. And I don't know why, but it's like, it's like stirred up these, like, these emotions of jealousy for me. And I know there's no reason to be jealous, but I guess because most of my best friends are women and I don't have a ton of like best guy friends. I don't know, it's just a difference for me. And I'm like struggling with it because I know there's no reason to be jealous, but I find these pangs of jealousy that I'm like having to squash in myself and just be quiet about.

[Carl]

I got two things to add here. First of all, the dude that she's going out with is like the most solid guy ever.

[Jen]

He's perfect.

[Carl]

But he's also a very good looking dude, so I could certainly understand like. And he works in a field that's dominated by women, so I can understand their height, especially in the beginning of a relationship. Hey, you'd have those Jealous feelings?

[Wendy]

Yeah. And I think, like, I don't know, when I go and hang out and have like, you know, drinks with a friend or, you know, dinner with a friend or whatever to just like, catch up and he'll do the same thing, but his is with his women friends. And so I don't know why I have. I think it was a couple of weeks ago that it came up because it was like a few different nights in a row that he was like, catching up with this friend or that friend or whatever. And I was like, all right, well, don't be mad about it. You know, just trying to squash those jealousy feelings because I know I have no reason to feel that way. And I've just got to figure out a way to get over that.

[Carl]

You know, Stacy and I went for probably months not seeing eye to eye on this through Burt's Big Adventure. We have a new webmaster for Burt's Big Adventure. He runs a studio down in St. Augustine. And they were working so much together that they had started to become really good friends, like texting each other all the time, on the phone with each other all the time. And I had a very difficult time with it. It doesn't help that he's really good looking. And we really went at it round and round. And I was really jealous about it. And she asked me, if I had this friend before we got married, would it be cool? And my answer was absolutely, yeah. Secondly, there was some superficial part of it also. It's a good looking dude. If it wasn't a good looking guy, I don't know that I would have been as jealous about it. But I really was pretty jealous about the relationship they were having. And I really felt like that's the beginning step to me of something that could have been much, much worse.

[Wendy]

Like a slippery slope to something else.

[Carl]

And I'm still not 100% comfortable with it. I gotta tell you, I was gonna

[Wendy]

ask how you guys resolved it. You just consistently talk about it.

[Carl]

Well, they were sort of inviting me into their group and I was resistant to it. And she basically said to me, this guy's not going anywhere. We're just friends. I'm allowed to have guy friends just the same way you're allowed to have girlfriends. Problem is, I've never even had the thought. Excuse me, Never had the thought of starting a friendship with a girl outside of my marriage. I just. I didn't. I thought that was off limits ground for us. Look, Here we are 13 years married and we're still learning, right? What's new real estate. And what's not right, that just in my head was never even an option. We had never talked about it. So she started this relationship with this guy and we had to redefine if that's cool or not. And at the end of the day, they did bring me in and I was more open to it. And actually I really dig this guy a lot. I really dig him. But I would not say that I'm 100%, totally and completely comfortable with that relationship, even today.

[Wendy]

Because they became friends afterwards. Yeah, because all of Grant's friends are friends that he had long before. I mean, they've been friends a long time. And I know that. That it's. It's non threatening, but I just feel these pangs. It's almost like shoots of like pain, like through your stomach when it hits you. You know what I'm saying? It's like almost like a physical reaction that I have to like, kind of suppress and be like, okay, usually not that way.

[Alex]

No.

[Wendy]

It's weird because you've always.

[Jen]

Because in the time that we've been on the show, I've heard you give advice to other people about that and. But I could see. Because it's new, because I could see where you're getting into that routine, But I think especially with your boyfriend and his friends, I mean, if anything was gonna happen between him and any of these women, it would have already happened.

[Wendy]

It would have already happened. Exactly. And I would have known about it. So there's. It's. I'm suppressing it and I haven't really. I haven't talked to him about it at all because it's illogical.

[Carl]

Well, I still think, for me, I still think at the end of the day that it's still ground that I don't want to walk on. I don't want to have relationships with women that are outside of my relationship with Stacey. Either you accept us as a couple or you don't. Which they were trying to do. The problem here is that I wasn't accept. I was resisting it. No, I don't want to be around the guy. I don't trust this relationship. But once I gave into it, turned out to be an awesome guy, spent the night at our house this weekend. Right in his own bed, I think. Do you really remember Saturday night? Anything could happen. I don't know. Hey, Maria. Good morning. You're on the Burt Show. Hi.

[Alex]

Good morning. I agree with you, Bert. I completely do not believe in opposite sex friendship. Just from my experience and other friends, every Male guy that I thought was just a friend would either end up falling in love or want to take it to the next step or even with my husband, his previous friends, like they either either did something or I just feel like if you don't step that if you don't go ahead and get started on that line, if you just prevent it, it cannot accumulate to anything else. Especially nowadays, most women nor men don't really have that much respect for each other. So it is really difficult to me nowadays. So you just have to have that boundary or that, you know, agreement within each other and just go from there.

[Burt]

Well, I think you can have a opposite sex relationship and it be a friendship because I had a best guy friend. But I think it's important that he introduce you to all of his girlfriends so that you don't feel insecure, so that you are brought into the group. I think that's a big factor in it.

[Carl]

I think you're really talking about two different things. You're talking about friendships that were forged before you got into your relationship and friendships that start afterwards.

[Wendy]

Start afterwards? Yeah. Because it does seem like, like Melissa said, like if anything was going to happen before, it would have happened before anyway and you wouldn't be in the relationship with them because they'd be in the relationship with the friend, you know. But I think, yeah, I think it's like after you're in a relationship, it's either like same sex, new friends or couple friends.

[Jen]

Right.

[Carl]

It almost felt to me like he was providing something for he. She was getting something out of that relationship with him that I wasn't providing. Also, like, why do you need to call him on the phone?

[Wendy]

And that's scary.

[Carl]

And I didn't like that at all. I still don't like that very much.

[Alex]

Yeah.

[Carl]

So I guess what I'm saying as I'm talking, I'm still not very okay with this relationship. I really am not.

[Jen]

First gonna throw something where we're gonna call Stacy on the phone.

[Carl]

I thought I was at peace with it, but I, I just now realized I'm not at peace with it. Hey, Tony, good morning. You're on the bird show.

[Alex]

Hey, good morning, guys.

[Burt]

What's happening, man?

[Alex]

And I was just gonna say that, you know, when you other, other girls see this guy with Jim, who's a very attractive woman, you know, they're gonna start awakening themselves to, you know, like, hey, I want this guy now for myself.

[Wendy]

Oh, you think that, that it'll make it worse?

[Alex]

It's possible. And men are dogs. We're animals, Yo.

[Wendy]

I have to say that I think. I think he's an exception. I don't think he's a dog.

[Jen]

Well, but the thing is, what is the advice, though? You're telling Jen. I mean, I know he's off the phone now, but, like, what are you telling Jen that she's going to tell her boyfriend now? You can't have any female friends.

[Wendy]

Like, I'm not going to do that. No, but.

[Carl]

But any. Anybody that he forms a friendship with now should be with the both of you guys. Or he can have those relationships, too.

[Wendy]

I don't know that I'd be comfortable with a new friendship, especially somebody that he would want to, like. Talked to a lot that wasn't a friend before. But, I mean, he has great friends that I've met that they were friends before. Some of the women are married, you know, all that stuff. That's all good because they were friends for a long time. But I think anybody knew that he was talking to or spending that much time with, I would have a real issue.

[Jen]

I would, too. And it's a huge red flag to me if there's anybody that wants to just be my friend or just be Katie's friend. You know, if it's a. Well, in my case, it's female friends, and if it's. Especially if it's a lesbian who just wants to be friends with one of us, then that is a huge red flag, right?

[Wendy]

Yes, totally.

[Carl]

One more call here. Good morning, Burt Show.

[Alex]

Hey, guys. I was calling because I wanted to let Jen know that it is virtually impossible for men and women to be friends and maintain that kind of level. Like the other caller said, of respect. I agree with Burt 100%. There is no way. I was married before and my husband, business partner slash friend, totally woman, all that. She was cute, had a nice shape, and it just does not work out. Even with male friends that I have. There will always be an underlying tension, no matter what, but it is virtually impossible. I agree with Jen. You have feelings there. Embrace those feelings. He needs to respect those feelings. And you just let him know, like, you know, is there any way that we can sit down and talk about this? Because the feelings that you have now, you're gonna have a year from now, you're gonna have two years from now, you're gonna have five years from now. So embrace those feelings, honey. They are there for a reason.

[Carl]

No, I mean, but you can't change the relationship he currently had before he got in it with you.

[Wendy]

I don't think so. And I'm not. I feel pangs of jealousy, but I don't feel threatened by those at all, you know?

[Jen]

What about you, Bert?

[Wendy]

Are you okay with that?

[Alex]

No, I'm not.

[Jen]

I don't have a talk about this later.

[Carl]

I guess I just buried it for a while. Well, I didn't realize that it was not nearly as good of this relationship. If you need a guy friend, I've got a guy in St. Augustine that I will hook you up with this

[Burt]

week to get out of my house.

[Jen]

The Bird show this episode is brought to you by Vinted. Hey, it's Cassie. And this is your heads up that you're probably sitting on a fat stack of cash and you don't even realize it, y'. All, I took a look at my closet the other day. Like Trip truly looked at it and I realized I probably don't wear half of it. It's just sitting there taking up space and guilt tripping me every time I buy a new piece of clothing, reminding me that, oh, I'm running out of closet space and I have all these beautiful clothes I never ever wear. And it's become this weird pain point in my life. And then I found Vinted. Vinted is a secondhand app that makes it easy for everyday people like you and me to sell pre loved fashion and earn some extra money. Vinted was the motivation I needed to clean out my closet. And I'm betting it's the same for you. So picture this. You use Vinted now you've got a less cluttered closet, a refreshed wardrobe with new pieces that you don't feel guilty about, and you made money. It's a win, win, win. And the extra nice part is that listing items on Vinted is quick and simple. And once an item sells, Vinted creates the prepaid shipping label for you. So if you're ready to clean out your closet and make some extra money, download the Vinted app for free and start listing. With no seller fees, you keep every dollar you earn. And for a limited time, you can enjoy free shipping in the US On Vinted. Can't wait to see what y' all are selling.

[Burt]

Best thing that's ever happened to you, financially. Go easy. Sold my car on Carvana. Amazing offer, really. I hit 200 on the scratcher. Did the scratcher come to your house and hand you a check? No. How many scratchers did you hit to get that? I hit a button on Carvana.com once. Okay, that's fair. It's like the lottery, except you always win. Not like the lottery at all, actually. Exactly. Inexplicably good offers worth bragging about. Sell your car today on Carvana. Pick up fees may apply.

[Carl]

Meet Keith loving dad board game champ bus driving pro.

[Burt]

I drive 65,000 miles in my bus each year. If people knew what I know, lives could be saved. Like how there are some things I simply can't see on my route. The other day, a car tried to sneak past me and ends up right in my blind spot. I turn slowly so I accident avoided. But no car should be in the blind spot for a 40,000 pound bus. It's our roads. It's our safety. Visit www.sharetheroadsafely.gov the Birch Show Tell you

[Jeff]

guys a funny story about something seen on 75 south recently.

[Jen]

Okay.

[Jeff]

Somebody was. A friend of mine was in traffic. Actually, I don't know if it was on. I know they take 75, but it may have been a surface street getting onto it or whatever. And they were stopped at a light and they were, you know, looking around at the cars next to them. And the person in the car to their right was the woman. It's not funny, so I'm not gonna laugh.

[Jen]

Don't laugh.

[Jeff]

The woman had made a fist and was punching herself in the head.

[Jen]

What?

[Jeff]

Obviously in frustration about something.

[Jen]

Oh, my gosh.

[Wendy]

You're kidding.

[Burt]

Punching herself?

[Jeff]

Yes.

[Jen]

Wow.

[Jeff]

I don't. I mean, I don't. Would you punch yourself hard?

[Jen]

So instead of punching her car, like if she was having a moment of anger, instead of punching like the dashboard or when she was punching or the

[Burt]

horn, like, at least honk if you're angry.

[Jeff]

So she was sitting in the car, punching herself in the head.

[Wendy]

Wow. What does your friend do at that point? Like double take and then move on?

[Jeff]

Well, that's what he asked. Like, what. What am I.

[Jen]

Should I take a video to put on YouTube?

[Wendy]

Duh.

[Jeff]

Should I try to help? Like, is that a. Is that 911 worthy or.

[Jen]

No.

[Jeff]

What if it's just somebody who's mad because. Crap. It's supposed to be there at 7. At 7:15.

[Jen]

Yeah. No, that's not. I mean, you just laugh and drive on the.

[Jeff]

You always get great stories, too, from truck drivers because they're up. Hi.

[Carl]

Yeah.

[Wendy]

What they get to see in a car.

[Jeff]

Yeah. Looking down in a car. Because people.

[Jen]

That can be dangerous.

[Wendy]

I don't really want to know.

[Jeff]

The law starts, I think on July 1st or something that you can't text, you know, message in a car. Excuse me.

[Jen]

Which is good.

[Jeff]

But that doesn't people shave in the car. Women paint their fingernails in the car.

[Jen]

The weirdest thing, I mean, there are times where I get self conscious about like if I do something like putting freshening up makeup or something at a stoplight because I try. I don't, I don't do that when I'm riding. But like, let's say I'm heading to an event in the evening or something that I may reapply makeup at a stoplight. But the weirdest thing I've ever seen is someone who's had the TVs inside their car and there has been porn on in the car.

[Carl]

Yeah, like.

[Wendy]

Like the drop down one that people typically allow kids to watch cartoons on.

[Jen]

Yeah.

[Burt]

Or the ones in the back of the seats.

[Wendy]

I've seen that too. I've seen that too.

[Jen]

Isn't that weird?

[Wendy]

Yeah, it's disgusting.

[Jen]

That's nasty.

[Wendy]

I actually saw somebody one time reading a book.

[Jeff]

Oh, I've seen that. I saw that on 85 South.

[Wendy]

Reading a novel. I mean like as they're driving.

[Alex]

Yes.

[Wendy]

Like as a big hardback book, like halfway open, leaned up on the steering wheel while they were driving. To me it wasn't on the highway. It was like stop and go traffic. But yeah, reading a novel, which I guess wouldn't be that much different than reading your phone. Phone. But to me it seems different. Like actually turning the pages of a book, having a leisurely drive home.

[Jen]

That is weird as you're driving because I think everything is acceptable at a stoplight when you're stopped. But when you're on the interstate, I

[Jeff]

mean, if you have a book in

[Jen]

your car at a stoplight, if you're reading a paragraph, for some reason I still think that if you're sitting there, but if you're in motion, I'm too

[Jeff]

add to read while I'm driving.

[Wendy]

How do you get through like two or three sentences and then go.

[Jeff]

Unless it's a totally mindless sentences, you know, nothing. Unless it's like a Us Weekly tabloid type thing.

[Jen]

If it's a magazine, it's different.

[Jeff]

Yeah, but if I'm reading a book, like what happened? Like I would forget about the paragraph I just read before I got to.

[Wendy]

Yeah, it doesn't seem like novel reading is really appropriate for me.

[Jeff]

Before I got to the next red light, didn't somebody see. What are those things that women use on their eyelashes to curl them?

[Wendy]

Oh, the eyelash curl.

[Jen]

Yeah, yeah.

[Wendy]

Going down the highway.

[Jen]

No, no, no, no, no. That' that's dangerous on so many levels.

[Jeff]

That wouldn't be an issue at all if you had to brake quickly or

[Wendy]

somebody rear ended you or distracting. I mean, I can't even get that right. Looking in the mirror at home, sitting at a vanity, not going anywhere. I can't get that thing right.

[Jeff]

And all you need to do is just get bumped just a little tiny bit.

[Jen]

Stop, stop.

[Burt]

Right there's just the same as mascara and eyeliner.

[Jen]

Stitches in the eyelid.

[Burt]

Not good. Hey, the Bird Show.

[Jen]

Hi, I'm Madison Tevlin.

[Burt]

And I'm Presley Hofstbach. We're the co host of Serving Smiles, a podcast where we try and make

[Carl]

health and wellness way less overwhelming.

[Burt]

In partnership with Colgate Palmolive, we're breaking down topics like oral health, skin health, and more with the help of expert guests. Check out Serving Smiles wherever. Get your podcasts.