The Bert Show — Full Show PT 2: Tuesday, December 9 [Vault] (December 9, 2025)

Main Theme Overview

In this lively edition of The Bert Show, the primary focus is a dramatic and divisive marital dispute: a wife holding her husband's Super Bowl ticket ransom as punishment for his lack of household responsibility. The cast digs into the ethics and dynamics of this 'punishment,' fielding passionate calls from listeners. In the second half, the mood lightens as hosts and callers share their favorite “mindless movies”—those films you always stop to watch when channel surfing. Expect authenticity, playful arguments, and a fair bit of nostalgia.

Segment 1: “Super Bowl Ticket Hostage” — Marital Drama Unfolds

(01:33 – 23:08)

Key Discussion Points

• The Story Emerges (01:36 – 06:50):

  • Jason calls in describing a work colleague, Sarah, who refuses to send her husband, Matt, his Super Bowl ticket in Houston because he neglects chores and house projects.
  • The cast debates what household neglect could possibly justify such drastic action.

• Listeners and Hosts Weigh In (06:53 – 23:08):

  • Opinions split, with some (like Bonnie and Victoria) empathizing with Sarah, and others (notably Bert, Jen, Melissa, and Jeff) taking Matt's side or calling the plan excessive.
  • Sarah herself joins the show (08:56), explaining her perspective: her husband repeatedly ignores household responsibilities and her appeals to help.

• Sarah’s Reasoning:

  • Sarah lists her grievances:
    • Incomplete projects (loose tiles, unfinished porch)
    • Not doing dishes (12:11)
    • A messy office and garage
    • Not helping her mother as promised (12:53 and 19:12)
    • Her “punishment” is rooted in a belief that nothing else gets her point across (13:48, 14:24)

• Cast and Listener Pushback:

  • Long-married listeners warn Sarah her action may cause lasting marital damage (15:00 – 18:10).
  • Melissa and Bert pressure Sarah to consider that “throwing this in his face” is bad for trust and partnership (16:28, 20:41).
  • Callers share stories of relationship struggles but caution against using once-in-a-lifetime moments as leverage (21:02 – 22:31).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Sarah’s Motive:

  • “She’s holding onto it...just to teach him a lesson because of some stuff that's been going on.”
    — Bert (08:25)

• Trying to Rationalize the Punishment:

  • “There’s nothing you can do that deserves that.”
    — Jason (04:38)

• Sarah’s Philosophy:

  • “I’m just going to give back to him exactly what he gives to me, right now.”
    — Sarah (16:21)
  • “This is not the life that I want...I don’t want someone who can’t finish anything.”
    — Sarah (15:43)

• Listener Wisdom:

  • “This situation will stink like a skunk under the coffee table in your living room for the rest of your marriage.”
    — Annette, 21-year married caller (15:00)
  • “Matt is not your child. He is your husband.”
    — Bonnie (17:05)
  • “Punishment does not fit the crime. This is locking him up for five years because he got a jaywalking ticket.”
    — Jeff (20:32)

• Sarah’s Stubbornness:

  • “There’s nothing that we can say to make you change your mind on this?”
    — Bert (22:31)
  • “No. Well, I’m positive that I’m doing the right thing.”
    — Sarah (22:34)

• Ending the Intervention:

  • “Can we call you on Monday, at least, to find out how everything went?...You gotta be honest with us about that.”
    — Bert (23:00)

Segment 2: “Mindless Movies” — Channel-Surfing Comfort Films

(25:05 – 36:54)

Key Discussion Points

• Why Mindless Movies? (25:05 – 26:13):

  • Bert introduces the segment by confessing his nostalgia for channel-surfing and stumbling upon old, comfort movies—specifically the 80s film Three O’Clock High.
  • Each cast member lists personal “must-stop” films—those they can’t help but watch, no matter how many times they've seen them.

• Top Picked Mindless Movies:

  • Better Off Dead, Real Genius, Lucas, 10 Things I Hate About You, Can’t Hardly Wait, Office Space, The Last Starfighter, Top Secret, Hiding Out
  • Callers add: Revenge of the Nerds, Heaven Help Us, Roller Boogie, Breaking 2: Electric Boogaloo, Clueless, Friday, Howard the Duck, Say Anything, National Lampoon’s Vacation, Short Circuit, Can’t Buy Me Love, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Footloose, The Boy Who Could Fly, Weird Science, The Breakfast Club, Sixteen Candles, Pretty in Pink, Raising Arizona, My Cousin Vinny, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Little Shop of Horrors, Spaceballs

• Listener Participation & Banter:

  • Callers passionately defend their favorites, sparking playful debate over what truly counts as “mindless.”
  • Jen singles out Clueless and Friday as endlessly re-watchable (31:12).
  • Jeff argues for Ferris Bueller as “the undisputed champion” (33:25).
  • Debate over Footloose — “Just does not stand the test of time...”
    — Bert (33:54)
  • Lighthearted confessions ("pretending pillows were celebrities") add laughter and camaraderie (35:26).

Notable Quotes & Fun Moments

• Bert’s Confession:

  • “Whenever [Three O’Clock High] is on and I’m channel surfing, I absolutely must stop on.”
    — Bert (25:44)

• Iconic Summing Up:

  • “If you have a Super Bowl ticket, you just want to be in the stadium [even] in the nosebleeds!”
    — Bert (14:09)

• On Mindless Movies:

  • “It’s the best quote movie. I mean, it talks about everybody’s life in the office.”
    — Jason & Victoria on Office Space (29:13)
  • “Anything with...Dempsey in it, you gotta watch.”
    — Bert (33:18)

• On Catching Classic Films:

  • “That is a movie you have to stop on.”
    — Bert on My Cousin Vinny (36:04)
  • “Any of the John Hughes movies?”
    — Bert (35:10)

Key Timestamps for Reference

• 01:33 — Main segment begins, Jason shares marital drama
• 02:34 — The Super Bowl ticket dilemma outlined by Jason
• 08:56 — Sarah (the wife) joins the show, confrontation begins
• 12:11 — Sarah lists the “crimes”: dishes, ice trays, mess
• 14:00 — Discussion of the actual Super Bowl ticket and seat
• 15:00 — Long-married listener calls in with warning
• 16:21 — Sarah asserts her tit-for-tat intention
• 18:05 — Reiterating husband's overall goodness; risk to marriage
• 20:32 — “Punishment does not fit the crime” analysis
• 22:34 — Sarah doubles down, refuses to reconsider
• 25:05 — Mindless movies segment starts
• 26:47–36:54 — Cast and callers name and debate classic comfort movies

Conclusion

This episode is a perfect capsule of The Bert Show’s signature mix: heated, hilarious engagement with real-life drama followed by playful, nostalgia-fueled group therapy. From listener phone-in wisdom to deep dives into the ethics of marriage “punishments” and the joy of comfort films, this episode offers a bit of catharsis—and a lot of laughs—for anyone looking to escape their morning routine.