The Bert Show: Full Show PT 2 – Tuesday, January 6 [Vault]

Original Air Date: January 6, 2026
Podcast Host: Bert, with Jen, Jeff, Melissa, and callers

Episode Overview

This episode dives into authentic, unfiltered conversations between The Bert Show hosts and their listeners, focusing on listener-submitted advice for the show members. Topics range from personal growth, relationships, and work-life balance to deeper explorations of gender roles, self-reflection, and commitment. The tone is lively, candid, and playful, with both serious and humorous exchanges, anchored by real-time listener input and the hosts’ signature banter.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Listener Advice for the Bert Show Crew (01:30 – 18:29)

Advice for Bert: Aging, Moderation, and Keeping Your Youth

• Letting Go of Youth
  Listener John advises Bert to “let go of your youth” (02:07), noting that excessive partying impacts his family and the show:

  • “You're a 52-year-old man, John.” — Bert (02:28)
  • Lighthearted follow-up: Bert jokes about a regrettable tattoo.

• Counterpoint: Embracing Youthfulness Listener Eve disagrees, championing a life-lived-youthfully:

  • “If you give it up, you're gonna be old before your time... when you die, they won’t have anything to talk about.” — Eve (08:18)
  • Bert acknowledges his struggle with moderation:
    “I've just never been a guy that has been able to just take things in moderation... I have a tough time saying no to anything that is a good time.” — Bert (08:52)

• Defining ‘Youthfulness’
  Jen distinguishes between having fun and harmful excess:

  • “Staying youthful is enjoying like innocent things, not necessarily getting wasted kind of youthful.” — Jen (09:30)

Advice for Jen: To Have (or Not Have) a Baby

• Peer Pressure
  Listener Jessica urges Jen to have a baby, reminiscing over Jen's on-air pregnancy test and her own new motherhood:

  • “Motherhood is... an amazing adventure." — Jessica (03:35)
  • Jen worries about career and motherhood:
    “I love this show. I don't want to stop working.” — Jen (04:00)

• Contrary Viewpoint Listener Debbie validates Jen’s concerns about losing career freedom:

  • “Don't get her advice... if I want to go to Walmart at 2 o'clock in the morning, I don't have to take and... throw diapers in the car.” — Debbie (11:01)

• Hosts’ Reflection Melissa identifies as someone not meant for motherhood, reinforcing the importance of self-knowledge. Bert observes Jen’s drive:

  • “You're just one of these people that will do whatever has to be done... you’re gonna be good at everything.” — Host (likely Bert) to Jen (12:20)

• Jen on Motivation

  • “Don’t you think that stress is what fuels me?” — Jen (12:53)

Advice for Jeff: Mental Health & Weight Concerns

• Medication Suggestion Listener Marianne quips that Jeff should be on Zoloft, referencing its cheerful advertising mascot (04:42).

• Weight & Lifestyle Another caller, Mark, jokes that Jeff’s brunch expertise and frequent dining may be tied to his size, gently warning about health:

  • “If Jeff wasn't such a restaurant connoisseur, maybe he'd be able to see his feet.” — Mark (14:14)
  • The exchange is jovial, with Bert and the hosts poking fun, but the health advice is registered:
    • “Big men die a lot faster than skinny men.” — Mark (14:34)
    • “I’m healthy. I go for walks every day. Walk the dog. I like to eat.” — Jeff (15:39)

• Personality and Apologies Another caller urges Jeff to admit when he’s wrong and apologize when needed. Jeff jokes:

  • “When I am wrong, I will say that I’m wrong. The problem is, I am never wrong.” — Jeff (16:19)

Melissa: Gender Double Standards

• Nature vs. Nurture Debate Caller Sean contends women’s sexual “choosiness” is genetic (05:04), while Melissa insists social expectations matter and people must take responsibility for their actions:

  • “I think every person, man or woman, has to be responsible for their actions.” — Melissa (06:39)
  • Bert highlights repeated listener feedback:
    • “If it was socially acceptable for you to go out and have as much sex with men as it is... would you do it? And across the board, women call up and say, oh, yeah.” — Bert (06:46)

• Further Discussion of Sexual Dynamics Conversation on whether women or men are more driven by looks or personality, with observations on how relationships are socially and biologically influenced:

  • “Women fall in love via their ears and men fall in love via their eyes.” — Host (likely Bert) (07:30)

2. Listener Dilemma: Marriage Proposal Regret (20:08 – 33:10)

Cheryl’s Story

• Cheryl calls in seeking advice after telling her boyfriend “no” when he proposed, then regretting it after a week of silence:

  • “We lived together. But he dropped me off and left. And I haven't seen him for a week...” — Cheryl (20:43)
  • She now wants to say yes, unsure how to fix things.

• Proposed Solutions

  • Melissa and Jen probe Cheryl’s motivations: Was it true love or just loneliness?
  • A caller suggests Cheryl propose back to her boyfriend. Bert and Melissa note she’ll need to be clear about why her answer changed.

• Emotional Honesty

  • Consensus: Cheryl should be honest about panicking (24:10). Bert says:
    • “To go back to him and say, look, I gotta be honest with you, I just kind of panicked... is there anything wrong with that?” — Host (likely Bert) (24:10)

Opinions from Listenership

• Go with Your Gut

  • Caller Cindy shares a similar story, advocating for listening to first instincts:
    • “If your first gut instinct is that no, then go with your gut. Because there is a reason why you have that feeling.” — Cindy (27:02)
  • Other callers and hosts highlight the importance of addressing deeper issues beyond love and considering practical factors (age, logistics, personal dreams).

• Difference Between Loving and Being “In Love”

  • The group attempts to define what it means to “love” versus being “in love,” especially when it comes to commitment and marriage:
    • “Loving someone and caring for someone is more of a best friendship.” — Jen (32:20)
    • “In love... is a part of a person, is a part of who you are when you’re in love with them.” — Melissa (32:45)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I’ve just never been a guy that has been able to just take things in moderation... I have a tough time saying no to anything that is a good time.” — Bert (08:52)
• "If I want to go to Walmart at 2 o'clock in the morning, I don't have to... throw diapers in the car." — Debbie, on childfree independence (11:01)
• “You’re gonna be a good mom. You're gonna be a great wife... it’s all gonna be fine in the long run.” — Host to Jen (12:20)
• “When I am wrong, I will say that I’m wrong. The problem is, I am never wrong.” — Jeff (16:19)
• “If it was socially acceptable for you to go out and have as much sex with men as it is socially acceptable for men to have with women, would you do it?... women call up and say, oh, yeah.” — Bert (06:46)
• “Women fall in love via their ears and men fall in love via their eyes.” — Host (likely Bert) (07:30)
• “If your first gut instinct is that no, then go with your gut. Because there is a reason why you have that feeling.” — Cindy (27:02)
• "Loving someone and caring for someone is more of a best friendship." — Jen (32:20)
• "In love is internal. It is a part of a person, is a part of who you are when you’re in love with them." — Melissa (32:45)

Key Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:30 – Listeners call in to give advice directly to Bert, Jen, Jeff, and Melissa.
• 02:07 – Advice for Bert on accepting aging and curbing excess.
• 03:01 – 04:24 – Listeners advise Jen about motherhood and work-life balance.
• 05:04 – 07:40 – Debate on gender double standards and the nature vs. nurture debate.
• 08:10 – 10:33 – Defining youthfulness—finding balance between fun and responsibility.
• 14:14 – Playful advice to Jeff on weight loss, life, and health.
• 16:01 – Jeff’s stance on apologies and being "always right."
• 20:08 – 33:10 – Cheryl’s proposal story, group debate, and calls on commitment and gut feelings.
• 32:20 – 32:45 – Discussion: “Love” vs. being “in love.”
• 33:11 – Show wrap-up and outro.

Overall Tone & Takeaways

The Bert Show community thrives on openness, humor, and thoughtful engagement with real-life issues. While callers and hosts poke fun at each other, the advice is rooted in honest concern, practicality, and empathy. Listeners are encouraged to weigh both their emotions and practical realities; whether it's about growing up, starting a family, or entering lifelong commitments, the consensus is: trust your gut, know yourself, communicate honestly, and don’t be afraid to live authentically (in moderation).