Full Show PT 2: Tuesday, July 21 [Vault]

Summary

The Bert Show – Full Show PT 2: Tuesday, July 21 [Vault]

Date: July 21, 2026
Cast Featured: Burt, Jeff Dollar, Melissa, Madison Tevlin, Whitney, Jim Valentine (guest), and others

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Episode Overview

On this energetic and candid episode, The Bert Show serves up a blend of humor, real-life stories, and listener interactions. The major themes are fun inventions and entrepreneurship, safe rides after drinking, unconventional life choices, workplace frustration (specifically from administrative professionals), and a hilariously awkward “meddling neighbor” tale. The cast dives deep into both thoughtful and ridiculous territory, keeping the tone authentic and relatable.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Zingo Experience: Safe Rides for Drinkers

Segment Start: [01:00]

• Burt recounts trying Zingo, a service that helps inebriated people get themselves and their cars home safely.
  • The service involves drivers arriving on foldable mopeds (or with a chase car if no mopeds are available).
  • The driver puts the moped into your trunk, drives you home in your own car, then departs on the moped.
• Jeff Dollar shares his own past experience with a similar service in Syracuse called “I’m Smart” (minus mopeds), noting a humorous moment where the car was left in the front yard, supposedly indicating to the neighbors that he’d driven home drunk.
• Crucial Takeaway: In Georgia, it’s a “no tolerance” state—any alcohol in your system could result in arrest, not just levels above the legal limit.

Burt: “Once you start to use the word ‘probably’… I know I could have made it. But I was legally probably best.” [02:49]

• Discussion about the convenience of Zingo for keeping your car and the importance of removing obstacles that encourage drunk driving.
  • Zingo charges: $28 for a local ride, $175 for UGA game pickups with groups.
  • Listeners and cast reflect on the tragic origins of companies like Zingo (founded after a drunk driving death).
  • Listener Dana calls in to mention “Safe Ride,” a similar service.
• Jim Valentine, Zingo Founder, calls in to explain Zingo’s origin, philosophy, and practicalities (pickup zones, costs, value as a safe alternative). [19:25]

Jim Valentine: “We provide really the only solution to the number one reason people drink and drive, and that’s the inconvenience of leaving your car.” [21:45]

Notable Quotes

• Melissa: “The reason people make the choice to drive home is because they want to take their car home. They don’t want to leave it at the bar.” [03:59]
• Burt: “I’ll take 28 bucks every single time versus a DUI.” [07:02]

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2. “The Guy Who Figured Out Life”: Unconventional Living

Segment Start: [07:50]

• Melissa tells a story about a bartender who works only four months a year—saving up enough to travel the world for the remainder.
  • He avoids expenses by staying with friends/family in Atlanta as needed.
  • Cast muses about what really constitutes “figuring it out” in life—religion, travel, perspective, etc.
  • Sparks a call for listeners who feel genuinely happy daily to share their “life secrets.”

Melissa: “His life is his vacation. And then by the time he gets to that bar… it’s just a matter of months before he is back on the road.” [08:38]

• Jeff Dollar jokes that with this inspiration, Melissa will quit and vanish for eight months of travel. [10:46]

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3. Meddling Neighbors & Cheaters: A Listener’s Awkward Lesson

Segment Start: [12:31]

• Recap: Whitney suspects her neighbor of cheating because a “random lady” visits when his wife’s away and she sees mysterious suitcases.
• Update: Whitney decides to confront the wife and is curtly told, “she’s a nurse,” implying Whitney misunderstood and overstepped.
  • Cast roasts Whitney (light-heartedly) for meddling and creating drama without evidence.
  • The situation leaves Whitney mortified and worried about neighborhood tension.

Whitney: “I should never have stuck my nose there. And I will remember that for the future.” [17:07]
Burt: “The advice across the board here is just let it go… This is not reversible.” [18:21]

Notable Moment

• Brutally Honest Life Lesson: “Don’t go stooping in other people’s business. You don’t know what’s happening in their lives.” [18:14]

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4. Administrative Professional Vent Line: Real-World Workplace Frustrations

Segment Start: [25:01]

• Context: It’s Administrative Professionals Day, so the show invited listeners to vent anonymously about their bosses.
• Highlights:
  • Overworked assistants receive meager rewards (like the “gift” of wearing jeans instead of a bonus).
  • Bosses pawn off tasks, are absent, or leave assistants to “manage the managers.”
  • A principal phones in to sincerely shout-out his assistant Becky, calling her a “rockstar” (Balancing a chaotic school environment with calm, positive energy) [25:27].
  • A stream of disguised, cathartic voicemails from listeners reveal stress, resentment, and a lot of dark workplace humor.

Caller: “He lets us wear jeans. So that’s what my bonus is. I get to wear jeans.” [27:41]
Another Caller: “She got an award for excellency… I should get that award because I’m the one who made her look good.” [29:55]

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5. The Next Great (or Ridiculous) Business Idea

Segment Start: [32:18]

• Jeff Dollar shares his entrepreneurial itch: he’s convinced that if he simply rents an office and sits in it every day, “success will come.”
  • The cast pokes fun, comparing this faith to “Field of Dreams” logic.
  • They riff on wild invention stories: Snuggie, poop-chocolate reindeers, and glow-in-the-dark pacifiers—mostly ideas that seem simple but become cash cows.
  • Jeff declares he’s even scouted offices, certain it will make him rich, while everyone else teases the lack of an actual business idea.

Jeff Dollar: “I’m convinced that if I just get an office… people will come meet with me, and I’ll be rich.” [35:40]

Memorable Banter

• Burt: “Why would I come to you for a follow-up idea if your first idea is so stupid?” [37:05]
• Jeff (cheekily): “Stupid people don’t have offices!” [37:12]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On drunk driving alternatives:

  • “It’s a hell of a lot cheaper than a DUI, for sure.” – Burt [23:05]
  • “Our tagline is: your ride, your tunes, you’re safe. It’s like having your own chauffeur.” – Jim Valentine [23:28]

• On unconventional lifestyles:

  • “His life is his vacation.” – Melissa [08:38]
  • “If you figured it out, you’re happy every single day—what’s the one thing?” – Burt [10:00]

• On workplace grievances:

  • “Why my boss tells me I’m the babysitter of all the managers in the departments? I’m actually managing them!” – Vent Caller [31:52]
  • “Read the whole email before you respond.” – Final anonymous message [32:02]

• On chasing business dreams:

  • “If you build it, they will come.” – Co-host/Friend [35:49]
  • “I fancy myself an entrepreneur.” – Jeff Dollar [32:18]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:00 – Zingo discussion: safe rides and innovations in designated drivers
• 07:50 – “Figuring out life”: the traveling bartender’s story
• 12:31 – Whitney’s neighbor-cheating investigation update
• 19:25 – Jim Valentine, Zingo founder on the air: origins and service info
• 25:01 – Bosses vent line: assistant stories and administrative shout-outs
• 32:18 – Jeff’s office daydream: humor about invention and entrepreneurship

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Summary Takeaway

Full of quick-witted banter and relatable stories, this episode is vintage Bert Show: introducing listeners to new services like Zingo, musing on what really matters in life (from perpetual travel to faith), and connecting with listeners’ everyday struggles—whether in the workplace, the neighborhood, or in pursuit of the next big idea. The cast’s transparency and humor make even awkward or serious topics approachable, proving there’s always a way to “make your mornings bearable.”

Transcript

[McDonald's Announcer]

All new drinks are now at McDonald's with refreshers like the Strawberry Watermelon Refresher and the Mango Pineapple Refresher with Popping Boba. To crafted sodas like the Sprite Berry Blast with berry flavors and cold foam. Who knew ice cold drinks could be so fire six? All new drinks are here now at McDonald's.

[Jeff Dollar]

Refreshers contain caffeine.

[Burt]

Hi, Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. Are you looking for a beach read this summer? May I suggest your big wireless bill? It's got suspense, mystery, a slightly flat emotional arc, and a shocking twist where you realize you've been overpaying the entire time. Fortunately, though, Mint's story is better. Every plan, $15 a month, even unlimited.

[Madison Tevlin]

That's it.

[Burt]

Happy ending, zero tears. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment

[Melissa]

of $45 for three months, $90 for six months or $180 for a 12 month plan. Required $15 per month. Equivalent taxes and fees. Extra initial plan term only greater than 50gb.me slow when network is busy.

[Co-host/Friend]

See terms.

[Burt]

You're on the Burt show. You know, I had a perfect time to mention this when you were talking about your inventions and stuff.

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah.

[Burt]

A second ago. You know how you were talking about how, like, nobody really could have predicted that the Snuggie, right. Was gonna make $20 million.

[Melissa]

Right.

[Burt]

You know, and I got to tell you guys, I used something over the weekend that if you would have come to me with this idea a year ago and asked me for 1500 $2000 to start this company, I'd have laughed in your face. But it turns out that it's a great, great service.

[Jeff Dollar]

And just for the record, I would have laughed in your face, but in a comfortable office.

[Burt]

Y' all ever hear a Zingo?

[Jim Valentine]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Friend]

Yeah.

[Burt]

I've only heard about it by reputation. You know what Zingo is?

[Co-host/Friend]

I know.

[Melissa]

I don't know yet.

[Burt]

Zingo is.

[Co-host/Friend]

We've talked about it on the show before.

[Burt]

I think we have. I used it this weekend.

[Jeff Dollar]

They used it. They came to one of our events and I was bummed because they didn't bring a moped.

[Burt]

I got. Yeah, I was bummed because they didn't have the moped.

[Jeff Dollar]

They were doing.

[Melissa]

I wasn't paying attention.

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah. And they supposed to have a moped and they didn't bring a moped.

[Burt]

You know how this works?

[Whitney]

No.

[Burt]

All right, so you call up Zingo, you got your drink on a little bit, Right? Okay, so I was at. I was at the Hawks Game an hour ago. Then I went over to 10 degrees south and I got my drink on. Buzzed, not drunk. But if I get behind the wheel of a car and I get pulled over on Roswell Road, I'm legally drunk. And you know what else I found out about yesterday?

[Madison Tevlin]

What?

[Burt]

Georgia is a no tolerance state. So even if you're not at the legal limit, the.08 or whatever it is, if you have any alcohol in your system at all, you could still get arrested.

[Melissa]

Any.

[Burt]

So if you have one drink and they pull you over, you can get arrested for that.

[Jeff Dollar]

I think they can arrest you even if you don't have anything, if they think you're impaired.

[Co-host/Friend]

Oh, wow.

[Burt]

So anyway, sidebar. So I'm getting my drink on pretty good and I'm not drunk and I could probably make it. But once you start to use the word probably, I know I could have made it. But I was legally probably best.

[Jeff Dollar]

Famous last words.

[Co-host/Friend]

Are you still driving? Can you drive with the knee?

[Burt]

No, I was with Stace and we were both pretty. I can drive today. Actually. Today was the first day.

[Melissa]

Well, the problem also is that if you say I can make it home, like we've had friends before that said I can make it home, and then somebody else did something stupid to cause the cop to get the attention of both people. Like is a car pull out in front of them or kind of dinged them a little bit. So then when the cops were talking to him about the accident, they realized that they had been drinking, you know what I'm saying? So it's not even worth it.

[Burt]

Totally not. Right? So one of the people that were in our group said, why don't I just call Xingo rather than wait for a cab, I'll call Xingo. And I wasn't really sure what it was, but here's what they do is they. They come to wherever you are and they've got a fold up moped. Okay? And in theory, in theory, they have a moped. I know they have a whole bunch of them. If they don't have a moped, they have a follow car chase car. Well, they bring this moped to you and they fold it up and they put it in your trunk, they drive you home in your car and then they take the folded scooter moped out of your trunk, get on it and zzzz.

[Melissa]

See, I remember this now because a lot of people, I think the reason that they make the choice to drive home is because they want to take their car home. They don't want to call A taxi and leave the car at the bar.

[Co-host/Friend]

If I'm not mistaken, the founders actually had a really tragic accident happen because of that. And one of the founders actually. It was a horrible. Where one of his best friends was killed.

[Burt]

Oh, yeah.

[Co-host/Friend]

And so I think as a result of that, started this company. Now, this is the life's work.

[Jeff Dollar]

There used to be a service in upstate New York called I'm Smart. When I lived in Syracuse, Same exact thing, but they didn't have mopeds.

[Burt]

The moped thing is what makes it. That's what I really wanted to see. But on this night, they just had the chase car, so.

[Co-host/Friend]

So they have two people come.

[Burt]

Yeah, yeah, they have two people come. In this case, with the chase car, but with the scooter, they don't.

[Madison Tevlin]

Right.

[Co-host/Friend]

With the car, it has to be chased.

[Jeff Dollar]

And with the. In Syracuse, that moped season's nine days long. Cause it's snowing most of the time.

[Melissa]

Is it really ever moped season?

[Jeff Dollar]

Right. So it's the car thing. So I called them once and woke up the next morning, like, took them. You know, they came, and it was me and someone else, and we rode home in the backseat of my car, and somebody drove it. Everything's cool. And wasn't really paying attention to much of anything, and fumbled my way into the house and fell asleep. And my parents were up to the camp, so they didn't, you know, they weren't home. And then when the next day, I looked out in the front yard, and they parked the car diagonally in the front yard.

[Co-host/Friend]

Oh.

[Jeff Dollar]

So they almost parked it as though I drove.

[Burt]

Oh, my God.

[Jeff Dollar]

Like, I'm actually. Like, I looked. I remember looking at it going, hold on. I called the I'm Smart people. What are they? And then they're jacking with you because it's like, okay, we're gonna get you home safely, and you're not gonna get a ticket, but we're gonna let all of your neighbors know that you were.

[McDonald's Announcer]

Wait,

[Burt]

it was $28. And it dropped the couple that we were with off before us in the buckhead area. So 28 bucks as opposed to a DUI?

[Melissa]

Yes. Oh, yeah, Absolutely.

[Burt]

And he, as he was driving us around also, he told us, and I got to remind you guys this, during football season, for $175, you can have a. You can bring like, 10 people up to UGA for a game in your own car. Up to 10 people. And if you make the arrangements beforehand, Zynga will drive you back from Athens in your own car. Worth It Okay. Which is nothing if you've got 10 people or eight people and you split 175 bucks. Because if you've, if you've ever been in Athens before trying to get a taxi, it's impossible after a game. If you set it up in advance, they will be up there. They've got like nine or ten people, Zingo people up there in Athens. And if you set it up in advance, they'll drive your car home with, with you and all your drunk friends.

[Jeff Dollar]

Do you know what sort of mind numbing medication the driver is on to be in the car with 10 drunk Uga fans? And is that a worse ride if Uga wins or if they lose?

[Melissa]

You just have to win. You know what? This ain't good. People just have to have your UGA gear on. Doesn't matter as long as you wear the right colors.

[Co-host/Friend]

Yes.

[Burt]

Hey, Dana, Good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Madison Tevlin]

Hey, I just wanted to tell you guys. There's also something called Safe Ride where you can call and they'll drive a car with another person in it. And then the person gets out and drives you and your friends in their car while the other person follows.

[Jeff Dollar]

What's it called?

[Burt]

Safe Ride.

[Madison Tevlin]

Safe Ride.

[Burt]

Safe Ride. Great. Thank you.

[Madison Tevlin]

Yeah.

[Burt]

You feel a little foolish making the call. To be totally honest with you, for some reason it feels different than calling a cab. I don't know, I just felt like.

[Melissa]

Felt like a failure.

[Burt]

What a loser. Man. I'm calling Zingo and they're gonna come pick me up in a scooter, but I'm gonna go for it anyway. But man, I'll take 28 bucks every single time.

[Jeff Dollar]

Crutching your way up Roswell Road, trying

[Burt]

to find your house, trying to do one of those sobriety things on the side of the road on crutches is gonna be really, really hard. That's 908.

[Whitney]

Now.

[Burt]

Q100.

[Melissa]

So I have discovered the person in Atlanta who, who has figured out life, who has figured it all out. Now I don't know the person directly. It was a friend. It's a friend of a friend. So we were at dinner the other night on a double date with a couple we know. And they were talking about this guy that they met, okay? And this is his life. He is a bartender, okay. And he bartends for four months out of the year and he saves all his money from the four months of the year and he travels for the rest of the year.

[Co-host/Friend]

That's great.

[Melissa]

So he is on vacation the Majority of the year. And on the tips and everything he does for four or five months during the year, during the winter months or summer months, maybe he is able to live his life, you know, freely the rest of the year.

[Co-host/Friend]

It's a travel. He's a single guy.

[Melissa]

Single guy can't have family.

[Caller/Principal]

Right?

[Melissa]

You're right. Single guy who bartends. And it is somewhere in midtown that he bartends. And. And we were having this discussion that normally you. You know how you pretty much work to live, you know, your work is your life. And then you get a couple, you know, we get a couple weeks off here, a couple weeks off there. But this guy, his life is his vacation. And then by the time he gets to that bar in 10's bar, he's in a great mood. He loves it. Cause he knows that it's just a matter of months before he is back on the road. And he. I mean, have you talked to him?

[Burt]

I think I know exactly who this guy is. That's a great idea.

[Co-host/Friend]

He lives with friends and stays with friends and family while he's here so

[Melissa]

he can save up the money.

[Co-host/Friend]

So there's like no Ren.

[Whitney]

No.

[Co-host/Friend]

Really any kind of bills. So, yeah, he travels and travels in

[Melissa]

the majority of the year. And we all discuss the fact that he has figured it out.

[Co-host/Friend]

Traveler. Like, he must have figured out how to travel very cheaply. Where does he go? Do you know?

[Melissa]

I have no idea. We were talking about. I mean, I think it's different places every time. And he's got, I mean, what, six months at least to travel? So it's probably several places, you know.

[Burt]

So you're saying this guy has got, like, the key to his life is traveling.

[Melissa]

I think he's figured out life. Figured out that right now in his life, you know, that he enjoys his job because his job is only there temporarily and he gets to meet a lot of people. And he knows that with, you know, the more he talks about his. He probably spends his bartending time talking about the trips that he has been on. And then he gets to live a free life for the majority of the year.

[Burt]

I think we would love to talk to the people that think that they not think. Because I'm not being condescending. The people that have figured it out for yourself. There's one thing that makes you feel like you figured it out. You're happy every single day. What is that one thing that you could share with everybody else for this guy, he'd call up and he would say, traveling for Jan might be Religion.

[Co-host/Friend]

Well, that's what I was going to say. I think a lot of the calls are going to be people who found a life in Christ and that's totally changed their world.

[Burt]

And that's for them. That is sort of their meaning of life, the thing that makes them happy. But what nugget could you share with us? We'll get deep here. 404-741. Q100. Am I phrasing that right?

[Melissa]

You think?

[Co-host/Friend]

Yeah.

[Melissa]

You think you figured it out? How have you figured it out? You figured out life.

[Burt]

You're happy every single day. And there's a reason for that. And what is the reason?

[Co-host/Friend]

You are constantly at peace.

[Jeff Dollar]

I would like to make a morph soup bet that now that Melissa has figured this out, she will not be in on Monday and we will not

[Madison Tevlin]

see her for eight months.

[Co-host/Friend]

She'll be bartending.

[Madison Tevlin]

Yep, that's right.

[Melissa]

Guess what I'll be doing from now on?

[Burt]

Listen, it's the vert show.

[McDonald's Announcer]

All new drinks are now at McDonald's with refreshers like the Strawberry Watermelon Refresher and the Mango Pineapple Refresher with Popping Boba to craft. And sodas like the Sprite Berry Blast with berry flavors and cold foam. Who knew ice cold drinks could be so. Fire six. All new drinks are here now at McDonald's.

[Jeff Dollar]

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[Burt]

Sponsored by Chumba Casino. No purchase necessary.

[Jim Valentine]

VGW Group, Fort Worth.

[Burt]

Prohibited by law 21+, terms and conditions apply.

[McDonald's Announcer]

All new drinks are now at McDonald's with refreshers like the Strawberry Watermelon Refresher and the Mango Pineapple Refresher with Popping Boba to crafted sodas like the Sprite Berry Blast with berry flavors and cold foam. Who knew ice cold drinks could be so. Fire six. All new drinks are here now at McDonald's.

[Jeff Dollar]

Refreshers contain caffeine.

[Burt]

This is the Birch Show. All right, so let's refresh your memory. Whitney last Friday calls us, and this is what she says.

[Whitney]

We live in the townhouse, so it's like, you know, we share it basically. And we're very, you know, so we're very close. And I've never really met them officially, and I'm not very super friendly with them. I've talked to the wife a few times at the pool, but, you know, not extensively, but I definitely think that her husband is cheating on her.

[Co-host/Friend]

And do they live right next to you? Like, you guys share a wall? Are they across from you?

[Whitney]

Yeah, yeah, we share the wall.

[Burt]

Okay. Then two things came out of the conversation that we had with her when we followed up with her on Monday.

[Whitney]

You know, we did follow him when he left, but he didn't go anywhere suspicious. But again, nothing much happened because the wife was never gone.

[Co-host/Friend]

Is this alleged affair you think is only happening Monday through Friday?

[Whitney]

I mean, it must be okay, because that's when, you know, he comes home from work. And then this woman comes to the house.

[Burt]

Okay. That was her first hint. And then the suitcases.

[Whitney]

A husband came out with two suitcases and put them in the back of one of their cars in the suv. And usually she drives that one. Someone must be leaving for the week or maybe, you know, I don't know how long. So if there's a wife, then I'm sure the girlfriend's gonna come over, and then I'm probably gonna follow her and

[Jim Valentine]

sort of see what her deal is

[Whitney]

if she, you know, when she leaves,

[Co-host/Friend]

she doesn't even know there's a girlfriend.

[Burt]

Doesn't have a clue.

[Co-host/Friend]

Just creating drama, that woman is.

[Madison Tevlin]

Yeah.

[Burt]

Creating drama for the sake of creating drama.

[Co-host/Friend]

But I'm into it. What happened?

[Burt]

Hey, Whitney.

[Whitney]

Hi.

[Burt]

Hi. How are you today?

[Whitney]

I'm okay. Hi.

[Melissa]

What happened?

[Burt]

Producer Tracy said this ends today. What'd you find out?

[Jeff Dollar]

Bless you.

[Whitney]

Yeah.

[Co-host/Friend]

Excuse me.

[Whitney]

So I. Sorry, I'm a little embarrassed.

[Burt]

Well, that should have happened last Friday. Go ahead. Sorry. Mean guy.

[Whitney]

So I did make the decision that I thought it would be. Mature decision. I thought that if the lady did come over, it would be weird to trail her, you know? But I did think that the wife should know if something was happening. So yesterday. Yesterday the wife came home from work, and I said hello, and I greeted her. And as nicely as I could, I said, listen, just so you know, when you're not here, a random lady comes over and spends an hour with your husband, pretty much. And she just stared at me. And I could tell she got really angry. And she just said, well, I just want you to know that she's a nurse and walks off.

[Melissa]

Oh, no, dude.

[Whitney]

Yeah, so I don't, of course, know any of the details.

[Jeff Dollar]

But you should go over there and find out what's wrong with him.

[Burt]

Yeah, what you ought to do, really now is start spinning him to find out exactly what's wrong with him so you have all the details.

[Whitney]

I feel so bad.

[Burt]

You should feel bad. You should feel foolish.

[Co-host/Friend]

Oh, my goodness. Did you just want to melt into the floor right there and disappear?

[Jeff Dollar]

So, wait, now I don't understand why the fact that she's a nurse makes it okay that they're having sex every day.

[Melissa]

Well, nurses are special people, so they get a pass. Yeah.

[Burt]

It's not infidelity if it's a nurse.

[Jeff Dollar]

Okay, if you just dress like a nurse on Halloween.

[Burt]

Well, so now you know. I think it was one Burch show caller that said, you know, that whatever happens here, you're going to end up messing up any kind of relationship you might have had with that neighbor. That's fried now. There will always be this weird tension because I've lived in townhome communities where we have had tension with a neighbor. And it's weird. When you pass them in your car, when you see them in the townhouse community, there's always this tension. And now you got it. And you share a wall with them.

[Caller/Principal]

Neat.

[Co-host/Friend]

Are you going to move?

[Whitney]

I don't know yet. I haven't had enough time to think about it. But, I mean, you know, I never really saw them that much beforehand.

[Co-host/Friend]

No, I think you should move. I really do. I think you should pack up and start looking on Craigslist.

[Jeff Dollar]

It's not. It's not a great real estate market, but that's, you know, you just gotta own it.

[Co-host/Friend]

Well, it's an apartment complex, isn't it?

[Burt]

It's townhouse.

[Whitney]

Yeah. Well, yeah, it's a townhouse, so it's. I don't know. I'm. I'm just, you know, I'm. I'm humbled. And I should never have, you know, stuck my nose there. And I will remember that for the future.

[Burt]

Now, my guess is because you've shown that you have this dramatic streak in you, like this. You like this kind of drama, that there's no way that you're gonna be able to let this go. You're gonna have to say sorry, right? You're gonna either knock on the door, you're gonna see her out, and you're gonna apologize, right?

[Melissa]

Let it go.

[Jeff Dollar]

Do not.

[Whitney]

If. If the moment seems right, then I will apologize because I do feel so bad. But, you know, I'm not going to force it. I'm not going to I'm not going to go to their. I'm not going to knock on their door and apologize because that would be

[Burt]

even worse about singing telegram. This has worked really well for us in the past.

[Melissa]

Don't say us, don't include us.

[Jeff Dollar]

You're so sensitive.

[Burt]

So the advice, things go great, you're

[Jeff Dollar]

on board and things don't. All of a sudden you're on.

[Melissa]

I'm an opportunist. That's called opportunist.

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah.

[Burt]

So what is the lesson here, Whitney?

[Whitney]

Don't go stooping in other people's business. You don't know what's happening in their lives.

[Melissa]

That's right.

[Burt]

Totally sound like my two year old. Okay. All right. And I think the advice across the board here is just let it go. You don't have to apologize. There's always gonna be tension and you can't. This is. This is not reversible.

[Melissa]

You've got a bad read on what when the moment is right. So, yeah, just let it go completely. Even if you feel the moment's right, just don't do it.

[Burt]

Let it go.

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Burt]

Did we find out what the suitcases and all that were for? I guess it doesn't matter at this point.

[Whitney]

Oh, yeah, they were. I mean, they were just. Were both gone again. You guys are right. They were both gone on Monday night.

[Jeff Dollar]

Portable Dallas.

[Whitney]

Someone trip or something? I don't know.

[Co-host/Friend]

Overnight at the hospital, maybe his oxygen, his pacemaker.

[Jeff Dollar]

They were just swapping out his artificial heart or nothing like that was a

[Melissa]

cooler a part of it because, you know that's a dead giveaway right there.

[Burt]

Okay, Whitney, I can't say. I can't say that I'm sorry that it ended the way it did. But thank you for sharing with us. Appreciate it.

[Melissa]

You learned your lesson.

[McDonald's Announcer]

Bye.

[Burt]

Bye. Don't be the nosy nail. It's the vert show. Good morning, Jim. You're on Q100.

[Jim Valentine]

Hey, guys. Bert, this is Jim Valentine. I'm the founder and owner of Zingo.

[Burt]

Oh, dude, where was my scooter on Saturday night? Man, I'm winning my scooter.

[Jim Valentine]

I haven't written one in a while, but yeah, our guys are out there and man, I just got a bunch of phone calls from friends saying that you guys were talking about us and I just wanted to call and thank you guys. I appreciate your mention, I really do.

[Burt]

Sure, no problem.

[Jeff Dollar]

Bird drinks like mad.

[Burt]

Oh, yeah, I'll call you all the time.

[Jeff Dollar]

He's a good person to have on your team. Because he's drunk. Right now he's probably gonna Zingo home from the radio station.

[Jim Valentine]

From the radio station this morning if we need to.

[Co-host/Friend]

I've got a couple questions for you. One, what's the best way to use it? And then two, I want to know the story behind it, the real story

[Jim Valentine]

behind it, the best way to use it. It's pretty simple. If you, if you call our dispatch line, which is 40467 Zingo 679-4646 we generally ask that you call about 30 minutes in advance.

[Co-host/Friend]

Okay.

[Jim Valentine]

Because, you know, our guys ride scooters that go 30 miles an hour and they can't quite get across town that quickly. So just, you know, when you're, when you're finishing ordering your last drink, you know, give us a call or text us. You can text that same, that same number and we'll send a driver out to you and we'll take you anywhere you need to go. We originate mostly out of, you know, itp, Buckhead, Midtown, the Highlands. But we'll drive, you know, we'll drive you as far as you need to go. We take people home to Alpharetta and Suwannee. And so it's. Yeah, it works pretty well. So that's the best way, the best way to get on our list. We have an opt in list. You can text. If you text Zingo Z I N G O to 41411. We send out blast once a day given deals. So that's a good thing to do. Text XINGO to 401, get information. And then as far as how it started, we started it five years ago based on a friend of mine sent me a text. It seemed this in Europe and so we brought it to Atlanta five years ago. Me and a couple other guys started it and have grown ever since. I think you guys had mentioned a gentleman you were talking about, Paxton Head, who had been involved in a crash in college. He's one of our investors and he was involved in a accident in college where his best friend died. And a heart wrenching story. You can see that on some of the press we've had on our website. But yeah, we just, we love operating this business. We serve a lot of folks here and we provide really the only solution to the number one reason people drink and drive and that's the inconvenience of leaving your car. We've all been there. You can't leave your car there. You got to be at work the next day. And so people think, you know, they have a couple glasses of Water and they think they're okay. And then, you know, then the rest is, you know, we know what happens.

[Whitney]

So.

[Caller/Principal]

Right.

[Burt]

Did I hear you at the front of this conversation say you only do in town or like let's say I'm in Alpharetta and I get my drink on our own. I'm further out than that. Will you find me there?

[Jim Valentine]

If you're in Alpharetta, we, we do pickups out there, but it's, it's, we don't have an operation out in Alpharetto. So what we do in that case is we charge a higher pickup fee. Our pickup fee is $20 plus $2 per mile. And if we pick you up out in Alpharetta, it's $30 pickup fee. But if you text that Zingo to 41411 it's automatically 5 bucks off if you just show our driver that you have that in your phone.

[Burt]

Oh really? Okay. A hell of a lot cheaper. I know that's a cliche. A hell of a lot cheaper than a dui for sure. Yeah. Thanks a lot for picking me up this weekend because it was awesome, dude.

[Jim Valentine]

Yeah, thank you so much. And it's actually cheaper than a two way cab as well. And so you know, when you go out with your friends, if you're going to take a cab out and home, Zingo's cheap. Doesn't count. You know, also if you take a cab to a certain bar and that bar is lame, you know, we've all done that and you get to take a cab to another bar, you know, your cab fares can, can quickly add up. So great value. Our tagline is your ride, your tunes, you're safe. So it's like having your own chauffeur in your own car. So it's really a nice experience.

[Burt]

And we're going to go ahead, we'll link up to it from our [e-mail]. All right, Jim, Thanks a lot, man.

[Jim Valentine]

Hey guys, thank you so much. I'm going to send you guys emails with some goodies for you guys. I appreciate it.

[Burt]

Thank you, dude.

[Jeff Dollar]

Just so you know to keep in mind this in mind, if you're going to call Zingo is the next morning when you're like, I was going to call my buddy and he'll take me to my car. They're all going to be as hungover as you are.

[Co-host/Friend]

Yeah. They're not waking up.

[Jim Valentine]

No.

[Jeff Dollar]

So when you got to be somewhere at like 11am and you call them

[Burt]

at 9:30 and statistics show Also with the designated driver thing, it's not that the designated driver isn't drinking, it's just that they're less drunk than everybody else in the car.

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah, that a designated driver wasn't supposed to drink at all.

[Burt]

No, you're not supposed to, but everybody else is drinking around you. So I'll just have one. Just have two.

[Jim Valentine]

I'll be out right now.

[Burt]

And again, for you UGA fans, if you go up to Athens during the season, they will come and they'll get you. You just got to schedule it in advance. And I think it's 175 bucks and they drive you back down from Athens, the whole car here. Bird Show.

[Madison Tevlin]

Hi, I'm Madison Tevlin. And I'm Presley Hospock. We're the co host of Serving Smiles,

[Burt]

a podcast where we try and make health and wellness way less overwhelming. In partnership with Colgate Palmolive, we're breaking

[Melissa]

down topics like oral health, skin health,

[Madison Tevlin]

and more with the help of expert guests. Check out Serving Smiles wherever. Get your podcasts.

[Burt]

The Burch show we opened up the boss's vent line yesterday. Said you had 24 hours if you're an administrative professional, to leave a message if you weren't digging on your boss so much. Told you that we would voice disguise it and we'd play it today. Oh, boy.

[Melissa]

Uh oh.

[Burt]

Oh, you guys are angry. Angry, angry, angry. We will play those messages for you guys here in just a couple of minutes. Jody, you are part of the Burt show. What's going on?

[Caller/Principal]

Hey, I just want to give a shout out to my secretary, assistant, professional, whatever you want to call her. I call her amazing.

[Melissa]

I call her Amazing.

[Caller/Principal]

She actually we work with some of the most difficult high school students in the Atlanta area. I'm the principal, she's my secretary. And she just. The world could be crashing down around her. Kids are doing things that they shouldn't be doing, fighting, whatever, tearing the place up, and she just remains calm. She's the closest person I can get to a lot of times when I'm trying to de escalate and I have to take my earrings out and my necklace off or whatever for safety, and I'm throwing radios at her, letting her take this. And I mean, she's just amazing. And she keeps coming back every day and it's hard to find someone like that.

[Jeff Dollar]

What type of high school situation would require you to remove jewelry for safety?

[Caller/Principal]

If they're doing things that are safety, they might injure themselves or others. We may have to go in. We first try to talk them down. And sometimes we have to go further than that. And we're all trained in doing that type of thing. She's not trained, but she always helps us. She can help us do that part, but she always assists in any other area that she can help.

[Jeff Dollar]

Are you in? Ninja.

[Burt]

Principal Ninja. What is your secretary? Professional assistant secretary Person's name?

[Caller/Principal]

Becky.

[Burt]

Becky.

[Melissa]

Good job, Becky.

[Burt]

Nice job, Becky. This will be the one call that we get today. Now, if you're on your way into work right now and you're a boss and you just now remembered that you know it's administrative professionals, that you better go get a card or something.

[Melissa]

Absolutely. Or take it to lunch. Or take him to lunch today.

[Burt]

That'll make your life hell. It'll make your life hell. I got this on Facebook yesterday. This is the anti Becky call. Had the ultimate jerk boss. FedExing his flip flops, paying his $1,800 water bill out of her own pocket while he was vacationing, and then fighting to get her money back. The list goes on and on and on and on and on and on. So we set up this vent specifically for people like this. If you are an administrative professional and today is the day that you just. You want to be honored, but you know he's not going to do anything, we said go ahead and just vent. We set up our vent line and say whatever you want, and we'll voice disguise it, but at least you'll get it out right? And here's what we got over the last 24 hours.

[Jim Valentine]

First message.

[Madison Tevlin]

Hi, my name's. I'm calling to Vince about my boss. I'm his executive assistant, and for Christmas, he does not give us a bonus. He lets us wear jeans. So that's what I bonus is that I get to wear jeans. This company works for literally the stupidest company ever. My boss is a freaking idiot. Doesn't have any idea how to run a company. He's always making me do crap. That's not my job. It's someone else's job. And I'm busy. Like, I work 62 hours one week, and he's still giving me crap that needs to go to someone else. He really only works like 10 hours a week. So thanks. Okay. My boss is totally going through menopause. She is in her 50. She is an attorney, and she just sucks. She cannot handle stress. And, oh, my God, she complains and complains and complains that it's all the clients and the work and things like that. And we all know that it's the fact that she's not getting any and going through menopause. Girlfriend needs some hormones. Hey, Bert Show. I am calling to vent about my bosses. I work in real estate and am an administrative assistant there. And my bosses are crazy. It's like working with my stepchildren. Anyway, I work extra hours. I have to work on the weekends. I have to work in the evenings. They text me and call me all the time, my personal time. And don't quit until I answer them on my time. It's just their entire. And they come in late every day. Then they expect you to do 500 things in the short period of time that they're there and they constantly interrupt you and it's just like working with a bunch of ADHD kids. It's just crazy. Anyway, I'm venting and the economy sucks, so can't go out and find another job. So I just have to put up with it. Thank you.

[Jeff Dollar]

Thank you. She's polite about it.

[Burt]

Yeah, I think that a lot of people are in that place right now that they want to leave so badly, but the economy is so tough. There are no jobs right now.

[Madison Tevlin]

Let me tell you about my boss that will send me an email asking me to email somebody else because she's too lazy to do it her damn self. And then she don't even come into work till like one in the afternoon. And then she wants to come in there and give me a million things to do. And when she does work from home, she's calling me out constantly, want me to get this and get that and email it to her and do this. Why don't you do your own damn job? Lazy. And she got an award for excellency. I should get that award because I'm the one who made her look good. Hi, Berto. Thank you so much for doing this because I have a lot of backup frustration. I hate my boss. Guys. You so stupid. You're so stupid. You blame everything on everyone else. You never do anything wrong and you never clean up after your mistakes. This Wendy, I hate her so much. Okay, now I feel better. Thank you. I love her. I just want to vent about my ball. I understand that you make a lot of money, but could you do some kind of work? I should have to do everything. And you and the other co worker constantly sit there and chit chat all day long while I'm the one that's doing all the work. It just makes me sick. Okay, I want to know being a clerical assistant, administrative assistant, why my boss tells me I'm the babysitter of all the managers in the departments. I deal with my manager, they can paid to be managers. I don't get paid to be a manager. When hi. Am I having to watch after them to make sure they do their job? It's ridiculous. I should get being paid to be the manager's manager because I'm actually managing them. Oh, amazing. It's crazy. Maybe. Sir.

[Whitney]

No.

[Madison Tevlin]

Administrative assistant.

[Whitney]

Yes.

[Madison Tevlin]

Read the whole email before you respond.

[Caller/Principal]

End of that.

[Melissa]

Wow, that was cryptic.

[Co-host/Friend]

Yes, ma'.

[Melissa]

Am.

[Burt]

Somebody read the whole email before you respond.

[Co-host/Friend]

Oh, respond.

[Jeff Dollar]

Somebody had an issue at that moment.

[Jim Valentine]

Wow.

[Burt]

The Birch show. The Birch show.

[Jeff Dollar]

So I've decided that I need to do something in order because I think you guys know that I fancy myself an entrepreneur. Like, I like to do new things and think of new things and stuff, you know, and try new stuff. And I'm convinced, and this really has been in my head probably for over a year. And I'm convinced I need to do this because this will propel me to like next level stuff. You know, this is gonna.

[Burt]

What level are you at now? What is the next level? You talking money wise, like you're talking live on an island by yourself.

[Melissa]

Okay.

[Jeff Dollar]

Like, I'm convinced that if I just did this next thing, it would set me on the track to coming up because I. What, What I like are the stories of people who come up with something, you know, like, what is it? Like the Snuggie. You know, somebody invents something, they probably. They probably had, you know, $20,000 worth of those things manufactured in China for a buck each and then sold each one for 25 bucks. And then all of a sudden, you know, the info they're selling. Million.

[Melissa]

Yeah. Like the reindeer that poops chocolate.

[Burt]

Yes.

[Jeff Dollar]

You know, you're not kidding.

[Melissa]

We all have owned one because we think it's funny. And that person's made a lot of money.

[Jeff Dollar]

And whoever thought of that start.

[Co-host/Friend]

Never heard of that.

[Burt]

Are you kidding?

[Melissa]

You've never seen the reindeer, the poops chocolate?

[Co-host/Friend]

No.

[Melissa]

Oh my God, you're missing out.

[Burt]

It is such a hit at Christmas time with my three year old.

[Melissa]

Oh my God.

[Burt]

Huge.

[Melissa]

You haven't lived until you've eaten reindeer chocolate.

[Madison Tevlin]

Save that.

[Burt]

I don't know.

[Jeff Dollar]

So I'm like, I'm convinced that there's something in the world that will take minimal financial investment and you know, like. And I'll just. It's gonna be a home run and then it becomes the hundred million dollar idea.

[Melissa]

Now is this gonna be something like some simple Okay.

[Jeff Dollar]

I have no idea.

[Melissa]

Oh, you don't know what it is.

[Jeff Dollar]

I don't know what it is. But I'm convinced that if I just do this one thing.

[Melissa]

Mm.

[Jeff Dollar]

One thing. Then I will be in a situation where it will happen.

[Burt]

Okay, here's what I think about all that. Because I think everybody's had that thought at one point or another. Every time I come up with the brilliant idea that's gonna get me out of here.

[Jeff Dollar]

But I wasn't saying it like that.

[Melissa]

He was thinking it. He wouldn't say it anything.

[Jeff Dollar]

I was trying to be more polite about it.

[Burt]

To where I could get so much money. You know, I'll Google it. And it's already been done. It feels like everything's done. I was so sure that the Glow in the Dark pacifier years ago. So when your kid wakes up in the middle of the night and they can't find the pacifier, and they wake up and wake you up, but if it's glowing and they put it in their mouth, they find it. I'm like, I am on easy street. In fact, I'm gonna call in sick today. Cause I'm never gonna see those people again. Good night.

[Madison Tevlin]

Right?

[Burt]

And then I Googled, and there's like 12 different brands out there. And that's happened to me, like, five different times.

[Jeff Dollar]

But the key is. Well, regardless of what it is, because you're talking about, like, an invention.

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Jeff Dollar]

Like, this could be anything. It could be a new way of doing something. It could be Facebook invent, could be a Facebook type, which I guess is an invention, but it's just something.

[Caller/Principal]

Right.

[Jeff Dollar]

I have a garlic idea, so you people leave me alone. This is my million dollar idea.

[Co-host/Friend]

Okay?

[Jeff Dollar]

I don't care about your pacifier and your garlic.

[Madison Tevlin]

What is it?

[Whitney]

Is it good?

[Burt]

I think so.

[Jeff Dollar]

Can you tell me about it? Uh, okay. So I'm convinced that if I just get an office.

[Melissa]

Get an office.

[Jim Valentine]

Yep.

[Melissa]

Like, if I ran an office space.

[Jeff Dollar]

If I go to an office building and I rent an office and I buy the furniture and put it in there and put a computer on my desk and a phone and a little bobblehead doll.

[Melissa]

Okay.

[Jeff Dollar]

And one of those things that go on the desk that are the calendar things.

[Melissa]

Yeah.

[Jeff Dollar]

I go there and I sit in there.

[Melissa]

It'll come to you.

[Jeff Dollar]

People will come meet with me, and I'll be rich.

[Co-host/Friend]

You know what? That's kind of the theory of if you build it, they will come.

[Jeff Dollar]

Right.

[Co-host/Friend]

The baseball stadium.

[Jeff Dollar]

Okay.

[Co-host/Friend]

I think it'll work.

[Burt]

But don't you you don't. You have like.

[Melissa]

But what are they gonna come meet you? What are they gonna come meet you about? I mean, you got your office and that's cool. And I say, oh, look, there's a

[Jeff Dollar]

glow in the dark pacifiers.

[Melissa]

There's a young man in there that I've got to come see. So. Excuse me, sir. What?

[Jeff Dollar]

Look at this, Melissa. I've been sitting here for minutes and birds like, spewing. Oh, they do a pacifier that glows in dark chance. Like I've got an idea for a garlic thing. Like, people just come to me.

[Burt]

But what am I going to come.

[Jeff Dollar]

Because I have an office, so we have to meet.

[Burt]

So if you have an office, that will be the funnel.

[Melissa]

Okay?

[Jeff Dollar]

People will want to meet.

[Burt]

Really? And if they meet with you, then

[Melissa]

what's it going to say on the door? Or is it always going to be open and you just are.

[Jeff Dollar]

My door is always open, Melissa.

[Co-host/Friend]

What if it just says Jeff dollar and Associates?

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

[Co-host/Friend]

And they're going to be like, where are the associates?

[Burt]

Is this your first great idea that will come out of that?

[Jeff Dollar]

Well, I would abbreviate it. It'll be Jeff dollar and ass. So people ask, I was like, where's the associates? I go, it's not associates. Check out this fine ass.

[Co-host/Friend]

What if you just make up one of those acronyms after your name?

[Jeff Dollar]

Like Esquire? Yeah, like, and just be fancy.

[Melissa]

No, just put a lot of letters LCMT. The hell does that make two or

[Co-host/Friend]

three different acronyms certified mean anything?

[Jeff Dollar]

Jeff$. WTF. LOL.

[Burt]

If we're looking at this logically, all right, your first idea is so stupid. Why would I come to you for a follow up idea?

[Jeff Dollar]

How do you know it's stupid though? Because it's. I have an office, but you don't. Stupid people don't have offices.

[Burt]

I can point. I can right now. Right now. We could walk down the hall and I can prove to you that that's not.

[Co-host/Friend]

So. But stupid people pay rent for offices they don't need.

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah, but that rent is an investment in the hundreds of million. I mean, you can come on my island and visit eventually, but I've gone so far as I've called buildings and gotten like floor plans and leases and stuff.

[Co-host/Friend]

Well, good luck to you, Jeff.

[Jim Valentine]

Wow.

[Jeff Dollar]

I'm going to have. I'm going to have an office.

[Co-host/Friend]

Okay.

[Burt]

And once that happens and then you're gone.

[Jeff Dollar]

Yes.

[Co-host/Friend]

Okay.

[Jeff Dollar]

I mean, it'll take a while because I have to have my meetings.

[Madison Tevlin]

About what? About what?

[Melissa]

Jeff?

[Co-host/Friend]

I like it.

[Burt]

If we find the office space for you, will you quit?

[Jeff Dollar]

Yeah, actually I would.

[Burt]

We're just praised the bird show.