Full Show PT 2: Wednesday, June 24 [Vault]

Summary

The Bert Show – Full Show PT 2: Wednesday, June 24 [Vault]

Date: June 24, 2026
Cast: Bert, Ellen, Scott, Kevin, Wendy, Tracy, Teddy, Brandon
Summary by Sections with Timestamps

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Episode Overview

This episode encapsulates the energy and authentic fun of The Bert Show as the cast covers everything from heartfelt Olympics interviews to lighthearted recaps of their Bitterball event, sprinkled with personal stories and lively debates. Key segments include a check-in with Olympian Alana Meyers, behind-the-scenes stories from their Bitterball party, a candid parenting discussion on co-sleeping, and a playful debate on tall vs. short dating dynamics.

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1. Olympic Check-In: Alana Meyers on Danger, Camaraderie & The Opening Ceremonies

[01:01–11:12]

Key Points & Insights

• Representation: Alana Meyers, only Georgian in the Winter Olympics, updates the cast after a tragic luge accident involving another Georgian athlete (from the country Georgia).
  • “It really put in perspective how dangerous our sliding sports are and how dangerous this track is.” (Alana Meyers, 01:47)
• Track Safety Adjustments:
  • The course is notorious for difficulties; changes made after the accident involve new ways to cut the ice for safer trajectories.
  • Emphasized difference experience makes: “If you are inexperienced, it’s a little bit more difficult... if you miss and pressures... you can get pretty hurt.” (02:24)
• Emotional Toll & Perspective:
  • The loss "shook up everyone," but the spirit of the Games persists.
  • “We’re about to experience one of the greatest moments of our lives, but at the same time, a fellow slider has just passed away.” (04:09)
• Opening Ceremonies Awe:
  • Alana shares the team’s pride and thrill: “Walking into the opening ceremonies, all you could see is all the bright lights and thousands and thousands of people. It was awe inspiring and just incredible.” (04:44)
• Olympic Village Life:
  • Dispels legendary “party” stories: Since her event is in the second week, she’s not partied yet, but acknowledges “there are definitely parties” as events end. (07:32)
  • Describes “USA House” as a hub for athletes and families—and mentions meeting Vice President Biden and Arnold Schwarzenegger. (08:31, 08:57)
• Global Athlete Camaraderie:
  • “We compete against [other countries] year round anyway, so we actually develop pretty good friendships.” (09:35)
• Event Schedule:
  • Alana’s competition dates: “February 23rd and 24th... at 5:00 p.m., which would be 8:00 p.m. your time.” (10:15)
• Family Shoutout:
  • “My parents, Jan and Eddie, and my sisters, Elise and Erica. Hi. Love you guys.” (10:38)

Memorable Quotes

• “I got to make it over there [USA House]. Haven’t seen any celebrities yet, but we did meet Vice President Biden and Arnold Schwarzenegger.” – Alana Meyers (08:53)
• “We’re a group of athletes serving our country. And it’s just a great feeling.” – Alana Meyers (06:24)

Notable Timestamps

• 01:27: Discussion about tragic luge accident.
• 04:44: Description of opening ceremonies.
• 06:58: On the Olympic Village parties.
• 10:15: Event schedule.

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2. Bitterball Recap: Behind the Scenes at Atlanta's Single Mingle

[12:14–26:05]

Key Points & Insights

• Event Overview:
  • The team recounts their annual Bitterball event—a party for singles on Valentine’s weekend, featuring a “Bitter Twitter” system for anonymous texting at the party.
  • “You could send a message to their number and say, ‘hey 1071, you’re looking good tonight.’ ...so everybody could see it.” (13:24, Wendy)
• Party Dynamics & Antics:
  • Lots of drinking, dancing, and liquid courage, with the dance floor “packed” and evidence of true party behavior (“people were grinding on the wall”). (14:09, 18:00)
  • Photo booth took a turn for the wild as the night went on.
• Personal Ads & Post-Party Interviews:
  • As people left, they were offered a chance to record ‘personal ads’ for the Monday radio show—featuring everything from the genuinely hopeful to the deeply inebriated.
  • Brian: “Any girl? Nah, dude. The ones that like me… You know, the girl that’s not my ex-girlfriend.” (19:20)
  • Chris: “My ideal type of girl is, well, Russian actually, and from Eastern Europe. And that’s not gonna happen here in Atlanta.” (21:44)
  • Joe: “Whores. Bitterball.” (25:26)
• Humor & Cautionary Tales:
  • Segments showcase the unfiltered, sometimes crude, realness of partygoers, with the show gently poking fun without cruelty.
  • “He had to hang on to the back of my shirt just to stay upright for the two minutes we were talking.” (23:28, Teddy)
  • Cops outside found the antics just as amusing as the hosts did.

Memorable Quotes

• “It was difficult for some people coming in after the pre-party… she was grinding on a brick wall, thinking that was a man or something.” – Teddy (18:00)
• “If you’re tall, how many short guys have you gone out with? Have you really, really tried?” – Bert (37:54)

Notable Timestamps

• 12:14: Bitterball audio montage starts.
• 13:24: Explanation of the “Bitter Twitter.”
• 19:00: Brian’s drunken personal ad.
• 21:44: Chris describes his 'type' and struggles.
• 25:26: Joe’s (chaotic) ad.

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3. Real-life Parenting: The Co-Sleeping Debate

[26:19–35:22]

Key Points & Insights

• Tracy’s Dilemma:
  • The ongoing struggle of where baby Ella sleeps—her own room vs. with parents vs. in their room in a crib.
  • “We finally made the decision to move the crib back into our room, and now the crib is in our room, pushed right up next to me.” (27:56)
• Emotional Intuition vs. Books:
  • Tracy’s instinct says to keep Ella close, despite reading all the sleep-training books (e.g., "Baby Wise").
  • Callers give strong opposing advice—some claim it ruins marriages, others emphasize following maternal instinct.
  • Tracy: “I just can't...bring myself to. You know, I mean, I know a lot of people say it's self-soothing... But to me, it's just... I can't do it. And something in me feels like it's not the right thing to do for her.” (28:57)
• Marriage Impact:
  • One caller shares: “It destroyed my marriage, and it took my daughter till she was about 11 to get her out of my room.” (31:30)
  • Tracy notes Scott, her husband, supports her choice—“He was the one that was encouraging me to do it.”
• Callers Weigh In:
  • Opinions split between routines and flexibility—“People are going to have so many opinions. I kept my kids in my bed...my four-year-old is fiercely independent.” (Caller Tammy, 33:08)

Memorable Quotes

• “At 8 months old, I don't think she needs to take care of herself.” – Tracy (33:46)
• “As a parent, you gotta follow your own instincts. Cause if you don’t and your child ends up a certain way...you are gonna kick yourself in the arms.” – Bert (35:08)

Notable Timestamps

• 27:56: Tracy describes the latest solution.
• 31:30: Call-in—the dangers of co-sleeping for marriage.
• 33:08: Counterpoint call-in—kid is independent despite co-sleeping.

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4. Tall vs. Short: The Great Dating Height Debate

[35:27–42:51]

Key Points & Insights

• Height Pool Politics:
  • Bert, 5'4", laments short men losing “their pool” of short women when tall guys date them.
  • “If you’re a dude that’s six, seven—leave our women alone. Leave our short chicks alone.” (36:13, Bert)
• Team Tall:
  • Wendy (5'3") admits “I haven’t gone out with anybody that was under six foot.” (37:57)
  • Listeners and cast debate the fairness and realities: “Short chicks should be with short dudes.” (36:17, Ellen)
  • Callers echo frustrations from both ends: tall women also say their dating pool shrinks when tall men chase petite women.
• Personal Experiences:
  • Bert tried dating taller women, but “I saw our reflection in a storefront window and she was so much taller than I was—I broke up with her the next day.” (41:12)
• Double Standards and Humor:
  • The team jokes about “fun size” dating “bite size,” and how kissing, dancing, and life logistics work in mixed-height couples.
  • Caller examples: Six-seven man (Jason) married to a five-two woman.
  • “Short guys that date tall women...that to me says, that's a secure dude right there.” (41:45, Bert)
• No Real Resolution—Just Good Laughs at Human Nature.

Memorable Quotes

• “You need to date short guys.” – Bert to Wendy (39:57)
• “Once you go short, you'll never go back.” – Bert (38:00)
• “If I was a tall guy, I would appreciate that because Wendy's got little hands and any guy likes that.” – Kevin (38:34)

Notable Timestamps

• 36:13 – 39:57: Main debate and lively banter.
• 41:02: Bert’s “storefront reflection” breakup story.

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5. Noteworthy Moments & Humor Throughout

• Commentators constantly riff on the absurdities of dating, parenting, and nightlife, keeping the tone light, quick, and real.
• The team’s chemistry shows as they gently tease each other, pull in callers, and keep Atlanta listeners at the heart of the show.

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In summary:
This episode delivers on The Bert Show's promise: it's real, funny, and grounded in everyday Atlanta life—moving from poignant Olympic stories to party hijinks and honest talk about family and love. Fans who missed the episode will feel like they were right there, from the Olympic village to the Bitterball dance floor.

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Listen to These Standout Segments:

• Olympic aftermath and opening ceremonies: [01:01–11:12]
• Bitterball realness: [12:14–26:05]
• Candid co-sleeping parenting debate: [26:19–35:22]
• Dating height debate: [35:27–42:51]

Transcript

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[Show Host/Producer]

The Fruit Show.

[Bert]

Go ahead and check your Winter Olympic roster and see where all the competitors are from. All right. California roster, 14, you know, New York, nine. Minnesota, 12.

[Ellen]

Georgia one.

[Bert]

Still being represented, still representing Georgia, being represented in the Winter Olympics. And that's Alana Meyers, and she talked to us last week before the ceremonies and she's back again from Vancouver. Hey, Alana.

[Caller]

Hey.

[Alana Meyers]

How are you?

[Ellen]

Good.

[Bert]

How are you?

[Alana Meyers]

I'm good. Good.

[Bert]

I mean, the first thing we have to address here is obviously is that loser from Georgia. I mean, this is before the official ceremonies even start that happen.

[Ellen]

So for you as an athlete who

[Bert]

is in sort of a, I guess

[Ellen]

like a sister sport, I mean, how

[Bert]

did you feel about that whole thing?

[Alana Meyers]

You know, it just kind of put in perspective how dangerous our sliding sports are and how dangerous this track is. And it really, it really shook up everyone around here. But, you know, I think they made some changes to the track and I think we're going to be okay.

[Ellen]

So.

[Bert]

So you do compete on the same track?

[Alana Meyers]

Yes, yes.

[Ellen]

And did you do.

[Bert]

And you did some practice runs before this all happened?

[Alana Meyers]

We've done two weeks of training earlier this year, and then we also did two weeks of training in a race last year.

[Wendy]

So what. Go ahead.

[Tracy]

So what kind of changes did they

[Wendy]

make to the track to make it safer for you guys?

[Alana Meyers]

There's ways you can cut ice differently. So basically they can cut the ice so sleds will stay on a different path. Unfortunately, the Georgian luge slider was a little bit inexperienced. And it's a track where a lot of people crash, but it's also a track where you can have good runs and you can make it down safely, too. The problem with this track is if you are inexperienced, it's a little bit more difficult. And if you miss and pressures, which is where we drive, you can get pretty hurt. And apparently that's what he did. He missed the pressure and just drove a curve wrong.

[Scott]

So where were you when you found out about the accident? Were you there at the training facility?

[Alana Meyers]

No, actually, I was in Vancouver getting ready for opening ceremonies.

[Scott]

Okay.

[Kevin]

You know, I got more than one text message with people just heard that a Georgian was killed on the track, and people thought it was you. Did anybody reach out to you that way?

[Alana Meyers]

No, actually, I didn't know anybody.

[Scott]

I was actually in the confusion between state and country.

[Kevin]

Yeah, I was in the. When I got off the plane, I traveled this weekend. When I got off the plane, I had, like, two or three text messages that said, I think the person you talked on this morning was hurt today. And so I looked it up real quick, but that startled me, and I thought, God, if I was a member of her family, and you only hear

[Ellen]

that in passing, what does that do to you as.

[Bert]

As an athlete? I mean, here it is, you're all excited, but it's before the ceremonies even

[Ellen]

start, and something that tragic happens. Does it sort of like. Does the emotion of the whole thing sort of get deflated for you, or do you defy it mentally?

[Bert]

How do you handle it as an athlete?

[Alana Meyers]

Well, I think, you know, it makes you recognize the state of our sports and how dangerous this track really is. And it puts everything into perspective. You know, we're at the Olympics Games. We're Olympic Games. We're competing for our country, but we're also doing something that is highly dangerous for us. It's bittersweet because, you know, we're about to experience one of the greatest moments of our lives. But at the same time, a fellow slider has just passed away and lost his life trying to do something he loves.

[Listener Donna]

Sure.

[Scott]

What was opening ceremonies like? When you walk out in front of that whole humongous crowd and you know that millions of people are watching on

[Alana Meyers]

tv, that was pretty amazing. I ended up walking up two opening ceremonies. So you get in line and you're walking for a long, long time. And, you know, we're walking around the stadium before any countries that even walked out. And we're standing there in these Ralph Lauren suits and everything, and, you know, everybody's cheering, screaming, USA And Canada is right behind us, or one country behind us, and they're going back and forth saying, go, Canada, go. And we're screaming back, us. That whole part to start off with was pretty amazing. And then walking into the opening ceremonies, and all you could see is all the bright lights and thousands and thousands of people. It was awe Inspiring and just incredible.

[Scott]

It was so much fun to watch from home. All of the US Athletes carrying their own cameras and they're like little flip video cameras. We were watching you and you were videotaping everybody else in the stadium and in the crowd. I mean, it was, you could tell everybody on that team was so proud. Even isn't his name Sean? Shaun White, who is, you know, incredibly famous, has been there before. You know, you would think that he would be jaded by the whole experience. I mean, he was beaming, smiling like an 8 year old kid walking into that Olympic ceremony, you know, that opening ceremonies, it was like it was a new experience for everyone all over again. No matter how successful of an athlete you were or how many times you'd

[Ellen]

been before, is that the very moment? I mean, even comparing it to the

[Bert]

day that you found out that you'd

[Ellen]

be competing in the Olympics, being in that opening ceremony, is that the day

[Bert]

that you really felt like, okay, I belong. This is what I'm doing here. I'm an American and I'm competing?

[Alana Meyers]

Yes, definitely. It definitely makes you feel one, you know, you're down there, I'm down there on the same field as Shaun White. And how many medals has he won? You know, it's pretty incredible. And it's, you know, and that really unifies you as a country walking through that opening ceremonies together. You know, apparently we look like a big army, just a massive group in our little polo outfits. And it's cool because that's really what we are. You know, we're a group of athletes serving our country. And it's just a great feeling.

[Kevin]

There are legendary stories of what happens in the Olympic village because for the most part, Olympic athletes are young, attractive, and have a lot of time waiting for their sport to come up, which leads to whatever. Is that sort of a donation relationship? Yeah. Is that like a don't ask, don't tell situation where we shouldn't even be looking into that or have you noticed any big, huge events, throwdowns back there in the, in the party area?

[Alana Meyers]

I haven't personally been able to engage in anything or go to any parties, but there are definitely parties. I think now that people are actually finishing their events, there will be more parties, but we're the second week, so we don't get to do much of that stuff in the meantime. I've been so bogged down with all kinds of random commitments, so we haven't been able to do anything like that. But I know we'll definitely go over to our USA house And definitely hang out there a little bit and try and do some celebrations.

[Bert]

It's a little bit like being the last one of all your friends that has finals. Like, everybody gets to celebrate two weeks before you do. They're all party.

[Alana Meyers]

You're like, I can't.

[Scott]

I know. I always hated my friends who had all their tests on Monday.

[Bert]

Right?

[Scott]

You had like one left on like Thursday afternoon.

[Ellen]

You're like, go. So you said you're going to go over to the USA House.

[Bert]

And by the way, we're talking to Alana Myers, who is the only Georgian from this state to be competing in the Winter Olympics.

[Ellen]

What is the USA House?

[Alana Meyers]

The USA House is basically a house where USA athletes and their families and their friends can go and hang out and basically just get away from village life and have some good food and just watch all the sporting events. And also, it's where usually when you hear about celebrities come to the Olympics, usually they go to those places. So it's pretty cool. I got to make it over there.

[Bert]

Have you seen any celebrities yet that have been in there?

[Alana Meyers]

Haven't seen any celebrities in there yet, but we did meet Vice President Biden and we were able to meet Arnold Schwarzenegger.

[Scott]

Wow. Very cool.

[Bert]

How has security been around the US Team?

[Alana Meyers]

We haven't really had any extra security, but the facilities are pretty secure. They actually do bomb checks under every bus when they come in. So it's metal detectors, the whole nine yards for everyone entering the villages.

[Bert]

And how are the US Athletes received by other athletes around the world?

[Alana Meyers]

So far so good. I think the thing is we compete against them year round anyways, so we see them all the time, all the other countries and everything like that. So we actually develop pretty good friendships with everyone. So the Olympics just kind of magnifies that, you know, we're well received by other athletes. I just don't know how well received by their fans.

[Ellen]

So for the next couple of weeks,

[Bert]

it's more practice runs for you and then your event is on what day?

[Alana Meyers]

February? 23rd and 24th.

[Bert]

Okay, 23rd and 24th.

[Scott]

So that's next week.

[Chris]

Sunday.

[Wendy]

That's Sunday.

[Scott]

No, it's Tuesday and Wednesday and Wednesday

[Alana Meyers]

at 5:00pm, which would be 8:00pm your time.

[Ellen]

Okay, awesome.

[Scott]

We will be watching and cheering you on.

[Ellen]

And with any luck, we can talk

[Bert]

to you once before that also and just still see how excited you are about the whole thing. Or if you're like, I am so over this and I am ready to compete already.

[Scott]

We're really proud of you and we Totally support you.

[Alana Meyers]

Sounds great.

[Ellen]

Is there anybody, anybody here back in

[Bert]

Georgia you want to say hey to?

[Alana Meyers]

My parents, Jan and Eddie and my sisters, Elise and Erica. Hi. Love you guys. I got an even Valentine's Day.

[Bert]

I got an email from your sister the other day.

[Brandon]

Really?

[Show Host/Producer]

Yeah.

[Kevin]

Shouldn't participate in love lost and found.

[Bert]

Hey, congratulations. We're all pulling for you. Okay, we'll talk to you soon.

[Alana Meyers]

Thank you.

[Bert]

Bye. That's Alana Myers from Douglasville competing in the Winter Olympics.

[Kevin]

Man, she's so cool.

[Bert]

It's really cool that we got somebody that we can talk to that's there competing.

[Scott]

What an honor.

[Bert]

Awesome.

[Caller]

Awesome.

[Show Host/Producer]

Get it the Bird Show.

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[Ellen]

Bitterball was a success on Saturday night.

[Partygoer]

Bitterball, the bitter Twitter, is the coolest.

[Brandon]

There's a lot of hot girls here. A lot.

[Partygoer]

I don't know if I'm going to climb my dream guy tonight, but hot and sexy would be good.

[Tracy]

She's very bitter.

[Partygoer]

Well, we're both getting divorced, so

[Wendy]

do

[Partygoer]

you have a girlfriend or a wife? You find that in Atlanta a lot. She's a great kisser. I'm looking for a man, not a boy. There's a lot of cute guys here.

[Sean]

I just met her tonight.

[Partygoer]

Just ran into each other. I like it. I like the energy. I think it's awesome. I'm so glad I came. We're not that drunk here, Cat.

[Sean]

Oh.

[Brandon]

Having a good time?

[Teddy]

Real good time?

[Chris]

Oh, yeah.

[Tracy]

Tall, dark and handsome.

[Partygoer]

Tall, dark and handsome. But I mean like, real dark, tall, cute, and smart and funny. It has to be funny. I want a really tall guy with really pretty eyes.

[Wendy]

I get it.

[Partygoer]

Best Bitter Ball ever.

[Bert]

It was a good time at Primal on Saturday night. People were. They lost their mind.

[Wendy]

It was a lot of fun. And people definitely took advantage of the Bitter Twitter, which I love.

[Scott]

That was fun.

[Bert]

Explain what that was.

[Wendy]

The Bitter Twitter is where you had a text message. You can text message on your phone to a number and then you are assigned a number. So if you saw someone hot across the bar that you wanted to talk to but were afraid to go up to him, you could send them a text message to their number and say, hey, 1071, you're looking good tonight. And then you could respond back on the Bitter Twitter and read it on this huge giant screen so everybody could see it. So it was really fun.

[Bert]

It worked out really well because as I was leaving, I heard one dude approach a girl that had, I guess, tweeted, like, meet me by the exit at like 12:30.

[Kevin]

Oh, that's good right there. And after midnight, exit meet means you could be doing it in the car

[Bert]

exactly within 45 minutes.

[Kevin]

Exactly 45.

[Bert]

And I heard him say, like, he

[Kevin]

gotta get back in there before too.

[Ellen]

I heard him say, I didn't think

[Bert]

you were gonna show up. She's like, here I am. And that was all I needed to hear right there.

[Scott]

That's cool.

[Bert]

So it worked out well.

[Scott]

The dance floor was packed. DJ Nuke did a great job. He's just so good on the ones and twos.

[Wendy]

And I can't wait to see the photo booth pictures because, you know, they start off pretty tame, but then everyone gets liquid confidence and meet somebody that they just want to like. Let's go take make out pictures. And I would just want to see what happened in there.

[Bert]

I'm assuming the pictures are going to be up online if they're not already. Atlanta.com yeah, I think they were up Sunday again.

[Teddy]

I think they were up Sunday.

[Bert]

They were.

[Teddy]

Okay, you know what?

[Kevin]

The only thing we have to remember this for next year is a couple people asked to function the Bitter Twitter actually as a Twitter account so the people who aren't at Bitterball can watch from afar.

[Bert]

Good idea.

[Kevin]

You know how we do for Burt's Big Adventure? Like, if you want to follow along with Burt's Big Adventure, we're just going to all be using the tag BBA10. So you could have it. Bitterball.

[Bert]

If you follow us, you could see the art tweets from Burt's big adventure. It'd be the same thing that we could do for Bitterball next year.

[Kevin]

Right? The dangerous thing is, like, next year, though, it'll be Bitterball 10 BB or Bitterball 11. BB 11, which is awfully close to BBA 11. And I don't think you want to mix up.

[Scott]

Definitely get those confused.

[Kevin]

Hey, you, meet me by the exit in a half hour. I got something in the car for you.

[Brandon]

Dude, what's happening at Disney?

[Show Host/Producer]

What did I donate to?

[Bert]

So what we do after Bitterball is generally as guys and women are walking out of there. You know, we'll say, look, if you didn't find anybody, why don't you go ahead and do like a personal ad right now and we'll play it on the radio on Monday morning.

[Ellen]

So, you know, if you didn't get

[Bert]

lucky tonight at Mitterball, maybe you had better luck on Monday. And intern Brandon here was the one that held the mics on Saturday night.

[Teddy]

Yeah, it was very entertaining. We also had the board where people could write notes to their exes as well. That was very entertaining to read some of the notes there as well. So I was manning the exit after people left. Primal, a little inebriated, with a lot to say. Some were angry, some weren't. And, you know, it was very interesting to hear some of these guys. And I had a couple of girls too, with their remarks and for their personal ad.

[Bert]

Very difficult to get through an entire sentence that night, like two in the

[Wendy]

morning, people were drinking.

[Teddy]

Nine o'.

[Sean]

Clock.

[Teddy]

It was difficult for some people coming in after the pre party. We had people coming in a little pregame in Forbidden Ball.

[Bert]

Our intern Natalie and Wendy were getting it on pretty well.

[Wendy]

Do they knock it back now?

[Kevin]

Natalie is. You have to know our intern Natalie. I was not at Bitterball because I got to go to Syracuse. So I heard this morning just, you know, somebody's really hammered when they're described as Natalie. Like, when they add. When they stretch out somebody's name, like,

[Scott]

ooh, did you see Natalie?

[Kevin]

Like, you know, Jen has gone out. Hey, I saw Jen out. Oh, you did? Yeah, she Jenn, like, you know, that means she was really doing it up. So that's how Natalie was described. And Natalie normally just moves through the office. She's very quiet, very efficient, focused, head down, taking care of business. Just, you know, give her 1, 2, 3 on the list and it's done and done well, never hear her, never see her. Just quiet, just moves around, takes care of business. But apparently she's a different person when she has a cocktail or seven.

[Bert]

Wendy's the one that got her all hammered.

[Wendy]

Well, she didn't have that much because Natalie's not a big drinker, so she doesn't go out and drink all the time or experience with getting drunk, quote unquote drunk. I think she had maybe two or three drinks.

[Kevin]

Oh, Lord.

[Wendy]

Three at max.

[Teddy]

One was on you, wasn't it?

[Wendy]

One I bought her in the beginning and then of course, she spilt it back.

[Kevin]

No, literally. Didn't it spill on you?

[Wendy]

Yeah, I did get a little down my dress.

[Bert]

Or rookie.

[Wendy]

Entire drink down my dress, but rookie had to wipe that up.

[Sean]

That was.

[Wendy]

That was a shame.

[Teddy]

It was definitely a strange experience because I was working the event for promotion, so I was sober the whole time.

[Bert]

That's no fun.

[Teddy]

Well, it shows a lot about the ladies of Atlanta. One of the. One of my tweets to the bitter Twitter was, I'm sober, you're drunk. You just look at. Look like an idiot right now because some of these people, she was like grinding on a brick wall, thinking that was a man or something.

[Brandon]

I don't know.

[Bert]

But if you're a drunk guy, that's your target, though.

[Teddy]

I don't know. She probably has a ration in a certain area right now because she was all up on the brain.

[Ellen]

You know what that is? That is the equivalent of like, have

[Bert]

you ever seen those, like, National Geographic movies? Like when a lion sees like a wounded bird or something and instantly starts to pounce?

[Ellen]

Yeah, that's when a girl is dancing

[Bert]

with a wall and she thinks it's a guy. Other guys are like, that's my target right there.

[Sean]

Right.

[Bert]

Well, lucky ladies, if you weren't there on Saturday night. And let's introduce you to Brian.

[Ellen]

Okay.

[Bert]

Because he's still available.

[Brandon]

What's your name, dude? I'm Brian. Polly.

[Sean]

Sean.

[Brandon]

Sean. So, Brian, how was your time in Bitterball, Dude, I couldn't have a better time.

[Talkspace User]

Okay.

[Brandon]

What happen? I know a lot, man. We hit on some chicks, dude. Got some Mac on. Hell yeah. We got our back on. We hit on some chicks. We don't even know where we're going right now. For real, dude, you the. What kind of girl do you look for, dude? For real?

[Alana Meyers]

Any girl.

[Brandon]

Any girl? Nah, dude. The ones that like me.

[Caller]

For real, though.

[Brandon]

You know the girl that's not my ex girlfriend.

[Teddy]

Any.

[Brandon]

What happened with your ex girlfriend, man? She's a liar whore, dude. Exactly, dude. She's a lion.

[Sean]

Like most women.

[Brandon]

Like most women. There you go. Pick one fantasy. What Would it be what?

[Listener Donna]

See?

[Brandon]

Nah, dude. You ain't talking.

[Sean]

Schoolgirl.

[Brandon]

You ain't talking to me.

[Sean]

No Catholic schoolgirl.

[Brandon]

Nah, dude.

[Sean]

With short skirt and the like.

[Brandon]

Yeah.

[Sean]

Flash. Nah, dude.

[Brandon]

Straight up freak. Like, straight up.

[Sean]

Not a freak.

[Brandon]

Like, she wants to do everything, anything.

[Wendy]

Oh, my God.

[Sean]

I don't even care.

[Brandon]

Even if she's not under the influence, like, she just want to do it pretty much exactly. Any girl that puts out wants to do anything and everything. We're doing this as a personal ad,

[Teddy]

so if you want, you can give

[Brandon]

out your phone number, post it with your 678. 622-5272. Okay. Can I take your picture for the website? Yeah, dude.

[Teddy]

So Brian and his friend's picture will be up on the website.

[Joe]

Cool.

[Bert]

With his phone number?

[Teddy]

Yeah. After that, Brian proceeded to fall backwards into the street. I really had to escort him and his friends across the street like little school children.

[Bert]

Okay. I don't think we're gonna be able to even get past this Chris guy because he's just plain drunk. It's two minutes long, and I don't think we can take all two minutes of it.

[Teddy]

Yeah, Chris was a little angry.

[Kevin]

Is this the guy?

[Teddy]

I believe Chris is the one.

[Bert]

Now, this is a different guy that the guy that got angry at you is Joe.

[Teddy]

Okay, Chris. I believe Chris is one of the last ones I did of the night. Hammered.

[Bert]

Just done hammered.

[Brandon]

Hey, what's your name?

[Chris]

Chris.

[Brandon]

Chris.

[Sean]

Okay. He couldn't even get past that.

[Ellen]

This is it, Chris.

[Teddy]

The sad part is I've seen Chris before at a couple of our events. He's a fan. He's probably listening right now. So consistent.

[Kevin]

Chris.

[Scott]

Fist pump. Chris.

[Teddy]

Chris. That was Chris at his worst, I think.

[Brandon]

What's your name?

[Chris]

My name's Chris.

[Brandon]

Chris.

[Teddy]

Okay. Did you meet any girls here?

[Chris]

No. No, no.

[Teddy]

What happened?

[Chris]

No. Well, that's probably my fault. But hey, if they didn't, I probably wouldn't have been anyhow because, hey, they were asking too many questions.

[Brandon]

What's your ideal type of girl?

[Chris]

My ideal type of girl is, well, Russian, actually, and from Eastern Europe. And that's not gonna happen here in Atlanta. That's okay. But hey. What? Okay, hey, I don't care what you say, because I know you're here just for that.

[Brandon]

Where would you rank yourself in terms of the guys here tonight?

[Chris]

Top 80.

[Teddy]

Top 80. Okay. Okay.

[Brandon]

We're gonna do a personal type thing on the website.

[Chris]

So if you want.

[Brandon]

You thought your phone number will take a picture. I'm gonna put it on the website. So what's your phone number?

[Chris]

All right, my phone number is.

[Kevin]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

Well, you already have it.

[Teddy]

I don't have it.

[Chris]

No, somebody has.

[Teddy]

Okay.

[Chris]

My owner is 678. 3 and 5, 2, 8. Hold on. 3 and 5, 2, 3.

[Alana Meyers]

I don't know.

[Chris]

And Bren knows it.

[Caller]

There's.

[Chris]

He knows it.

[Brandon]

Any closing comments about tonight?

[Chris]

Closing comments I know about tonight is that I'm going to be in the Owen Wilson movie.

[Alana Meyers]

Okay.

[Chris]

And you know what? People, you know, they. You know. Well, they. Actually. No one does anything about this. I'll be. You know,

[Teddy]

this guy, I am shocked

[Scott]

he didn't hook up.

[Chris]

No, it's not.

[Brandon]

Okay.

[Teddy]

I'm taking.

[Joe]

That's cool.

[Brandon]

Okay, thank you.

[Listener Donna]

Wow.

[Teddy]

He had to hang on to the back of my shirt just to stay upright for the two minutes that we were talking.

[Ellen]

You know how there are some people that turn happy?

[Bert]

Wendy's a happy drunk. This guy, Joe, not a. Not a happy.

[Brandon]

No, not at all.

[Teddy]

Not at all. What's your name?

[Sean]

Joe.

[Brandon]

Joe, what happened tonight, Bitterball?

[Joe]

It don't matter to me, dog.

[Brandon]

Okay, what happened, though? How was your time in Bitterball?

[Joe]

My Bitterball was tight, man.

[Teddy]

Okay.

[Joe]

Hey, you know what? They want some. Get some, dog.

[Brandon]

I mean, that's between you and the cops.

[Joe]

All right? Are you the dude on Bitterball? What's your name?

[Brandon]

No, I'm Brandon. I work with The Bird Show, 1Q100.

[Joe]

You work with a bird show?

[Brandon]

Yeah, the morning show.

[Joe]

How about Teddy? Bird show some, though?

[Teddy]

I don't think so.

[Brandon]

Tell him to get something. I don't think so. So you, are you overall good time?

[Joe]

Yeah. Okay, you think better? You think better ball want to get some?

[Brandon]

No, I don't think so.

[Teddy]

I don't think so.

[Joe]

Better ball want to talk to me?

[Show Host/Producer]

What?

[Teddy]

Get some back next year.

[Brandon]

Are you serious? Are you gonna have girls by now? Are you serious?

[Bert]

This guy's starting a fight with you?

[Teddy]

Yeah, yeah, he's. He got tossed out of the club.

[Kevin]

So he thought you were, like, with the club or with the.

[Teddy]

I don't know, but my name. The name tag that I had that we get tags when we're working. The event had Bitterball on it, so I think he thought my name was Bitter. That hammered.

[Kevin]

So this is your party and he got thrown out of your party, so now he's gonna.

[Teddy]

Yeah, now he's gonna take out all this.

[Kevin]

Are the cops out front just watching you do this?

[Teddy]

Yeah, and they're laughing and. I mean, they kicked him out. They threw him down the street. So I went to go interview him and they were having a ball. They. They tried to start a fight with him as well. Because he wanted to fight them with the cop. Yeah, the cops were like, hey, if you want some, you can come get some from us. And then that's where he got that you want some mentality. Was trying to fight the cops.

[Scott]

Lucky, lucky ladies.

[Brandon]

Serious bitter balls being for real.

[Teddy]

Smash it.

[Brandon]

What kind of girls do you normally go for?

[Joe]

Whores. Better ball.

[Brandon]

What's your ideal fantasy with any woman?

[Bert]

Wow.

[Joe]

Tell you what, you trying to make it bitter ball.

[Brandon]

Ha ha ha.

[Alana Meyers]

For real.

[Joe]

Like, like, like. Funny thing. You know what?

[Brandon]

We're just doing interviews.

[Joe]

You want to know what? Not bitter ball. For real. What? And it ain't me, boy.

[Teddy]

Okay. Thank you.

[Bert]

Pretty sure what.

[Teddy]

At least he didn't call me Mahogany, so he called me boy.

[Brandon]

What?

[Kevin]

I don't know what your nickname is going to be now. Is it going to be Mahogany or is it going to be Bitterball?

[Show Host/Producer]

I don't know.

[Teddy]

I was called Butterball as a child, but Bitterball works too.

[Kevin]

You've got more classic nicknames in your six weeks working with the show than any Internet.

[Teddy]

Gotta be known for something.

[Show Host/Producer]

Now listen, it's the Vert show. It's the Vert show.

[Ellen]

So Tracy and Scott here, Producer Tracy and Scott here have struggled and struggled

[Bert]

and struggled with some decisions going on with.

[Ellen]

How old is Ellen now?

[Tracy]

She'll be eight months and a couple days.

[Bert]

Eight months.

[Ellen]

Do we bring her in the room

[Bert]

with us at night?

[Ellen]

Does she have her own room outside? Do we keep her in a bed with us? Do we keep her on the side of the bed? And something else. And the last time I think we checked in with you, was she in her own room?

[Tracy]

She was in her own room, but she wasn't sleeping very well in her own room. So it was just a constant struggle back and forth. I was up all night, Scott was up all night. And because she wasn't sleeping well in her own room, we kind of compromised. And she was sleeping in the living room in a baby seat with Scott because she seemed to sleep well there. But I still struggled with the fact that I wanted her close to me. So I was considering co sleeping, which if you don't know, because if you're not a parent, co sleeping is actually sharing your bed with your child. And then at some point, once they get older, you know, you move them into their own room or their own crib. So like I said last time, I really. I felt like, that was right for our family. You know, I said, I don't think it's right for every family. I don't think that you're a bad parent if you don't do it. Because obviously that was not my first choice. My first choice was to have her in her own crib, but that wasn't working for us, so I was considering letting her sleep in my bed. The only reason I hadn't done it is for safety reasons. You know, I knew that there was the chance you could roll over on her. You know, there's. You know, she could fall off the bed. Like, there's just so many different reasons why. I was a little nervous too. So, you know, I put it off and put it off, and nothing was getting any better. So we finally made the decision to move the crib back into our room, and now the crib is in our room, pushed right up next to me.

[Bert]

How's that been working out so far?

[Tracy]

Awesome.

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Tracy]

And what, she's still waking up sometimes through the night? Not as often, but she just seems to sleep so much better, and so do I. Like, I don't know if there was something instinctually in me that was telling me, you need to be close to your baby. I mean, you guys know, like, I don't like being away from her, so the fact that she was all the way, you know, in another room by herself, like, just made me really uncomfortable. So just the fact that I know she's right there and she just kind of, like, wiggles herself, like, right up to the side of the bed, like, as close as possible to me. And I just do it, too. Like, we both wake up in the middle of the night and we're both right there.

[Ellen]

Is it gonna be weird to you, do you think, on prom night when

[Bert]

she comes home with her date and she's got a bed set up right next to you? Also because she's not capable of sleeping

[Wendy]

in her own house, I think her

[Bert]

prom day be like, all right, mom and daughter.

[Ellen]

That would be my biggest concern right

[Bert]

there, is that you're not allowing her to sort of fight through her own

[Ellen]

fears, even as a little baby, and handle things herself.

[Bert]

You're so coddling with her.

[Tracy]

I know. And I just can't. I can't bring myself to. You know, I mean, I know a lot of people say it's self soothing, and, yeah, maybe I need to let her do that, but to me, it's just.

[Scott]

I don't know.

[Tracy]

I can't do it. And something in me feels like it's not the right thing to do for her. I'm not saying it's not the right thing to do for every other baby, but I just can't bring myself to do it. And it makes me feel better to have her there. It makes her feel better to have her there. She's waking up in the middle of the night, so I don't have, I don't have to get out of bed. Like she's right there. You know, I can feed her, I can do whatever I need to do without having to get out of bed in the middle of the night.

[Ellen]

Hey, Krista, good Morning.

[Bert]

You're on Q100.

[Caller]

Hey.

[Listener Donna]

Love you guys.

[Bert]

Thank you.

[Listener Donna]

You're my baby buddy. But honey, you have to become a confident mom. Ella is coming into your world. You're not into her world. There is a book called baby wise by Dr. Izzo. It was so informative for me and my husband. Both of us read it when we were going. We were having two babies and to this day you have to get them on a great routine. You say it feels good that you know she's there with you, but it will feel even better knowing that she's self soothing, that she can sleep through the night and not have to be so comfortable. Because really, if you don't start it now, when she gets to be two, oh, there's going to be.

[Bert]

We use that Baby Wise book also with both of our kids and it worked really, really great. There are some parents that just absolutely

[Ellen]

have tried to use that book and they can't get their child on that routine.

[Bert]

But it worked wonderfully for us.

[Tracy]

And I've read Baby Wise because Stacy gave it to me. So I've read. I mean, I've read every single book. And I agree, like there's. It works great for some parents. I wanted to do it. It's just not working for us. And after I talked about this the last time, you know, yes, I got emails from people saying that I was doing the wrong thing, but I got hundreds of emails from people saying you have to do what is right for your baby. I did the same thing. I did it against, you know, I went against what everybody else was telling me. I did it and it worked great for our family.

[Wendy]

So is there a cutoff age where she's gonna go back into her own room or are you just gonna keep her there until she's like 2 or 3 years old?

[Ellen]

15, 16?

[Tracy]

No, I mean, I don't want to keep her in there forever, but I mean, I Don't know what the cutoff age is. Maybe it's. Maybe it's only gonna be a couple months. Maybe it's gonna be once she does start sleeping through the night. Now, let me also say I don't think she's sleeping through the night because she's not eating well during the day. So she is waking up in the middle of the night, and she's eating quite a bit. So I think that has a lot to do with it. Also, once she's eating better, maybe she'll sleep through the night. And maybe at that point, I can put her in her own room.

[Bert]

Here is Donna. Good morning.

[Ellen]

You are on Q100.

[Caller]

Hi, Bert. My name's Donna, and I just want to tell Tracy that I think she's making a big mistake by keeping the baby in her room. I did that, and it destroyed my marriage. It destroyed my marriage, and it took my daughter till she was about 11 to get her out of my room.

[Ellen]

So you say it destroyed your marriage.

[Bert]

In what way?

[Caller]

It separate. You know, you don't have that bond together, your husband in your bed together. You have your baby between you and her child between you your whole life. And, you know, I just don't think that's a good decision. I really want her to think about that.

[Tracy]

I would agree. I mean, I would agree with you in the sense that I've gotten so many emails from. From women also saying that my husband's not happy with it, but it was the best thing for me and the baby. Scott likes it. He was the one that was encouraging me to do it. The entire time, he was telling me, if your gut's telling you that she needs to be in the room with, you know, with you or with us, then that's what you should do. And he's happy with it also. I mean, she's not in the bed with us. She's not taking up his space. She's in a crib right next to me. And, you know, I mean, before, he was sleeping in the living room with her. So how is that helping our marriage?

[Ellen]

Does she take her naps and stuff in there also?

[Tracy]

Well, Cause that's. Her crib is in there. So.

[Ellen]

So when are you and Scott, where

[Bert]

do you guys get your alone time?

[Tracy]

I mean, it's one house, and there's

[Bert]

a lot of different rooms and stuff.

[Tracy]

There's other rooms.

[Ellen]

Tammy, good morning.

[Scott]

Too much information.

[Bert]

It was a question I asked and didn't really want to know the answer to as it was coming out of my house.

[Scott]

Did I Just say that.

[Wendy]

Do it in the kitchen.

[Bert]

Oh, my gosh, we're on the radio. I can't ask that information. Hey, Tammy, what's going on?

[Caller]

Nothing much. Good morning. Okay, I want to say people are going to have so many opinions. I. I kept my kids in my bed with me in the crib and, and the bassinet with me. And my four year old is fiercely independent. My six year old, I mean, she's like, I mean, once in a while, yeah, she'll come back. If she's had a bad night, she knows that she can come, you know, sleep with me, but she's in her room. I think it's what feels right for you, number one. And number two, it's not about, you know, children do want to know when they're that little that their mommy's there. It's a very scary thing to try to wean your child and make them independent at eight months is unrealistic.

[Tracy]

And that's my opinion, too. And everybody keeps. The people that are against it are saying, like, oh, you know, she's gonna be so clingy and she's not gonna be able to take care of herself and she's always gonna need you. But the funny thing is, is all the emails that I'm getting from people doing this are saying their child is so much more independent than other children because they know that their needs are gonna be met. They know that mommy's always gonna be there at eight months old. I don't that she needs to take care of herself.

[Ellen]

See, for me, it would be more

[Bert]

of a symptom, like if, if you're coddling her that much in.

[Ellen]

At nighttime when she's fussy. My guess is that you're pretty consistent

[Bert]

in your parenting that anytime she gets a little fussy with any little thing,

[Ellen]

you're not allowing her to try to take care of herself first. And you and Scott are right there

[Bert]

for her, saying, we're gonna take care of it for you.

[Tracy]

Yeah. And maybe you're right. I mean, I'm certainly trying, you know, I'm certainly trying to make sure that, you know, when she struggles with crawling, I'm not like, oh, here, let me help you. You know, like, I know she needs to do stuff on her own. I know she needs to struggle, but if she's looking for mommy and she wants her mommy or she wants her daddy, like, I don't feel like at 8 months old, I should tell her, no, you can't have me.

[Teddy]

I'm still looking for my mommy.

[Caller]

Daddy.

[Wendy]

Too.

[Scott]

Come here, bird.

[Bert]

Now that I think about it.

[Wendy]

Come on, Mom.

[Sean]

You have ruined that room for me and my family.

[Partygoer]

Also,

[Bert]

you know, I told Tracy this off the air that you know what the truth is. As a parent, you gotta follow your own instincts. Cause if you don't and your child ends up a certain way in the

[Ellen]

long run, you are gonna kick yourself in the arms.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Tracy]

20 years.

[Bert]

Damn you, Bert.

[Show Host/Producer]

Here, Burt Show. This is the Burt Show.

[Bert]

Wendy, I got a problem with the guy that you're going out with.

[Kevin]

Oh, dude, leave her alone.

[Caller]

Who?

[Ellen]

The dude. The dude that you had the date with yesterday.

[Scott]

Why?

[Bert]

Well, I only know one thing about him, and I don't like it at all.

[Ellen]

Wendy, how tall are you?

[Wendy]

I'm five three.

[Kevin]

Oh, no.

[Ellen]

How tall is he?

[Wendy]

Six seven.

[Caller]

What?

[Scott]

Wow.

[Bert]

I like it.

[Scott]

He's really tall. Dang, girl.

[Listener Donna]

I know.

[Wendy]

So I get to wear all my really tall high heels.

[Bert]

It's not cool. It's not cool for.

[Ellen]

It's not cool for him, it's cool for you.

[Bert]

It's not cool for him. And I'm coming from a short man's perspective here. When you're 5 4, you're 5 5. You're 5 6. The pool of short chicks for us to hang out with is pretty shallow. Okay?

[Ellen]

So if you're a dude, that's six, seven.

[Bert]

Leave our women alone. Leave our short chicks alone.

[Ellen]

Short chicks should be with short dudes. And if you're 6, 7, it's an embarrassment of riches.

[Bert]

You can have girls. 5, 8, 5, 9, 5, 10, 6, 2, 6, 4.

[Ellen]

But you should leave the short chicks

[Bert]

to the short dudes.

[Ellen]

Well, you should be with a short man.

[Wendy]

We're not in a relationship. We went on one day.

[Scott]

You don't even think dating should be allowed?

[Brandon]

No.

[Bert]

And this doesn't cross racial lines either.

[Ellen]

I don't think white people should just

[Bert]

be with white people. I don't think black people should just be with black people. But I am very, very strong in the short tall thing.

[Scott]

You're. You're like height. What would. Instead of racism, it'd be like heidecism.

[Wendy]

Well, you can be.

[Scott]

Yeah, I don't know what to call it.

[Bert]

Fun size. Should stick with fun size.

[Wendy]

I like being fun size.

[Kevin]

Is that what you call yourself instead of short?

[Bert]

Yes, it's fun size or bite size.

[Kevin]

What if me and Kevin Smith want to be fun size?

[Bert]

Wow, that's a lot of relationship right there.

[Wendy]

No, he says he doesn't normally go for short girls, but, I mean, it was just one Date.

[Tracy]

So we'll see.

[Scott]

But, Bert, I'm guessing that tall women feel the same way that you do that. Because I have a friend who is over six foot tall and she feels like she has less of a, you know. Or she has a boyfriend now, very serious one. But. But in the. In the dating world, she felt like she had less of a pool. Especially if tall guys totally date her. Totally important dating short girls. She's like, hey, wait a second.

[Listener Donna]

6.

[Ellen]

One should date six seven. The pool is really, really shallow.

[Alana Meyers]

Right.

[Bert]

Very tall and very short. So on behalf of all the short dudes, I think what you're doing is. It's betrayal.

[Wendy]

Well, I can't help what I'm attracted to. I'm just attracted to tall guys.

[Bert]

If you're tall, how many short guys have you gone out with? Have you really, really tried?

[Wendy]

I haven't gone out with anybody that was under six foot.

[Bert]

Well, there you go. Once you go short, you'll never go back.

[Wendy]

So I should try dating somebody who's like 5 6?

[Ellen]

Yes, you absolutely should.

[Scott]

Give it a try.

[Wendy]

The only person I know is you, and I can't date you because then that's weird.

[Brandon]

Anything?

[Bert]

It's not gonna work on a couple of different levels, but there's gotta be.

[Kevin]

What about that Wags guy? How tall is he?

[Wendy]

Perfect.

[Scott]

Married?

[Bert]

He's five eight.

[Ellen]

Is five eight too short for you?

[Sean]

Come on.

[Wendy]

Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I like tall guys. I don't know what it is. It's just, you know, what? Like petite and small.

[Kevin]

If I was a tall guy, I would appreciate that because Wendy's got little hands and any guy likes that.

[Ellen]

Well, that's why I can tell you

[Bert]

as a short guy, you want to find short girls with small hands.

[Kevin]

Well, you just. Why don't you just get somebody in those Burger King commercials?

[Bert]

Hey, Chrissy. Good Morning. You're on Q100.

[Brandon]

Hey.

[Sean]

Hi.

[Caller]

I've got to agree with you, bert. I'm like, 5 9, borderline 5 10. And I've always dated guys who are my same height just because there's like, tall guys are so hard to find. Luckily, I found like a six foot six guy that I've been dating for the past year. But regardless, it's so hard to find a tall guy.

[Sean]

No, I'm serious.

[Caller]

I don't want him to flats everybody every time we go out. That sucks.

[Scott]

Yeah, that didn't help. The high heels thing is, what is awesome about dating a tall guy, right? Is that you can wear high heels and they're still taller than you feel.

[Partygoer]

Like little.

[Wendy]

You feel like a girl when you date. Like a really tall guy who can, like, just like, be next to you.

[Scott]

It does make you feel more, but

[Kevin]

you feel like if that guy's 6 7, 6 7, like, you have to feel like the mouse that the dude in the Green Mile held onto. You know what I'm saying? Like, he could pick you up and put you on his shoulder.

[Scott]

Mr. Jingles or something.

[Kevin]

Yeah, Mr. Jingles. The little mouse that played with the.

[Ellen]

How do you even kiss? I mean, physically. If he's 67 and you're 5 3, how does it even work?

[Scott]

She has a booster seat.

[Wendy]

I have a step stool. No, you just kind of make it work. I don't know.

[Bert]

It can't be comfortable. You need to date short guys.

[Wendy]

Okay, let me call him today and say no more dates.

[Kevin]

Well, don't you have. Why don't you just ask around at your next meeting? Don't you guys all get together?

[Bert]

Yeah, but it's an anonymous meeting.

[Ellen]

Hey, Jason. Good morning.

[Bert]

You're on Q100.

[Alana Meyers]

Good morning, Virtual. How you guys doing today?

[Ellen]

Okay. You have got the voice of a tall person.

[Alana Meyers]

Yeah, I'm six seven. My wife's five two.

[Bert]

Yeah, see, I can't condone this.

[Wendy]

And it works out for you guys, right?

[Scott]

5 2.

[Caller]

We've been married for three years and

[Alana Meyers]

we have a three foot two year old little boy.

[Bert]

Damn, he's as tall as I am already.

[Show Host/Producer]

It's just.

[Alana Meyers]

Sorry.

[Ellen]

I don't blame her because I know tall women. I mean, and that short women, you know, have this. They want to be with tall guys. But six seven and five two, the five two, your wife should have stuck

[Bert]

around for a guy. Five four, you have. You have drained the short pool. And it sucks for guys like me.

[Scott]

Would you ever date anybody taller than you when you were dating?

[Bert]

I did it one time, okay? I told you guys about this. I dated Debbie Pierce, who was. She was quite a. She's like 4 or 5 inches taller than me. I thought I was secure enough to do it. And things were good.

[Ellen]

Man, we were hanging for like two or three weeks. I mean, we even dabbled in relationship from time to time.

[Bert]

And then we went shopping one day

[Ellen]

together and I saw our reflection in

[Bert]

a storefront window and she was so much taller than I was. I broke up with her the next day.

[Scott]

Couldn't handle it.

[Bert]

I couldn't handle it because my friend

[Scott]

I was telling you about, the one who's 6 foot and her sister's 6 foot 2. They're both in relationships with guys that are shorter than them and totally. Yeah, not like a huge difference, but enough that you can definitely tell a difference when they're standing next to each other and they're totally fine with it. I actually totally in love with somebody shorter than her.

[Bert]

Short guys that date tall women. In all honesty, I. I'm. I think it's amazing that you can have that kind of security and actually do it, because I've tried it and

[Ellen]

I couldn't do it. So when I see a guy that's

[Bert]

dating a taller woman, that to me says, that's a secure dude right there. That's pretty impressive because I could never pull that off.

[Wendy]

And if you reverse it, I mean, I'm a like a five, three. And so if I date someone my height or shorter, I mean, it's the same thing, the same comparison. It's just weird.

[Bert]

You can't even find somebody shorter than you. A dude.

[Scott]

I wonder if we could like a

[Bert]

guy that's 4, 11 or 5 foot.

[Scott]

How tall are you, Wendy?

[Wendy]

Five three.

[Bert]

Would you date a guy 5, 2? Not a chance.

[Ellen]

Say it. Just be honest.

[Kevin]

That'd be funny.

[Wendy]

No, because I would feel insecure and really big.

[Kevin]

But think about. You could teach him to drive, you know, and then for the rest of your life, he'll know that the first time he drove a car was with you. And I don't mean that like, in a sexual innuendo way. I mean, literally, you could give him his learner's permit and take him to the DMV for his driver's test.

[Bert]

I was at Asia on Saturday night with Stacy. We were eating, and a short. A guy walked in there that was shorter than me, and I purposely sat next to him, just.

[Partygoer]

No, you did not.

[Brandon]

I did.

[Bert]

I purposely pulled up the chair right next to him.

[Partygoer]

That's awesome.

[Bert]

This is my house, buddy. You want some?

[Show Host/Producer]

This is the bird show.