Transcript

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Jen (1:18)

The Birch show was talking to one of my girlfriends last week and she and I are both single now, newly single, and, you know, kind of having a hard time with it. And we were just talking about the holidays coming up and what everybody's plans are gonna be for Thanksgiving and for Christmas and all that kind of stuff. And you know, she's just realizing that it's a tough time of year, I think, to be single.

Melissa (1:41)

Absolutely.

Jen (1:41)

You know, because it's like you're going back to like family and everybody wants to know what's going on with you or whatever. And there's some sort of like implied like pity or something on single people, you know, and it's like almost, it's almost like annoying and frustrating and people

Elizabeth (1:59)

are like, you're single. Oh, and it's the holiday.

Jen (2:02)

Oh, yeah, it's like this sort of like pity party thing or whatever. And it's like, no, really, it's gonna be okay. So I don't know, we were just trying to figure out like ways, like the best ways to sort of like beat the Holiday blues. And I think we're both shortening our trips home to see our families.

Summary

The Bert Show – Full Show PT 2: Wednesday, May 6 [Vault]

Date: May 6, 2026
Podcast: The Bert Show
Cast: Bert (Host), Jen, Melissa, Elizabeth, Andy (Atlanta Ghost Hunter), Gina (Holly Springs Police Clerk), and various callers

Episode Overview

This episode delivers The Bert Show’s trademark blend of authenticity, humor, and relatable morning banter, focusing on three major storylines:

Coping with the Holiday "Single Blues": Jen and callers discuss strategies for newly single people to manage the loneliness of holidays.
Ghost Hunting Adventures: The Atlanta Ghost Hunters, led by Andy, reveal spine-chilling details and real audio evidence from recent paranormal investigations — with a focus on Holly Springs police department.
Dating Dilemmas Live On-Air: Listener Terry’s struggle with "overmessaging" a love interest becomes a group therapy session, dishing out tough love, real advice, and comedic interventions.

The episode balances real-life issues, spooky intrigue, and listener engagement, capturing the show’s community feel and fast-moving conversations.

Holiday “Single Blues” & Surviving the Season

[01:18 – 09:21]

Key Points & Insights:

Being Single During the Holidays: Jen and her friend, both newly single, dread the implied pity from family during gatherings.
- Jen: "There's some sort of implied pity...it's almost like annoying and frustrating." (01:41)
- They agree to shorten their trips home to avoid the post-holiday emotional lull.
Post-Christmas Lull: The week between Christmas and New Year’s is harshest for single adults.
- Jen: “If I sat home with my folks for that week, I would probably want to shoot myself...Not because I don't love my family, but just because. Whatever.” (03:39)
Travel as an Antidote: Jen and friend plan to escape by booking a trip, possibly to Europe, departing Christmas night.
- Host: “If you do take off Christmas night...you’re going to be around people just like you, which will be awesome.” (05:35)
Listener Wendy’s Story: Calls in to share a story — a Thanksgiving spent skipping family led to wine, Facebook, and reconnecting with her 4th-grade boyfriend (now fiancé).
- Wendy: “We were drinking wine, ended up on Facebook, ended up reconnecting with my fourth grade boyfriend, and now we're engaged.” (07:13)

Memorable Moments & Quotes:

Jen, on post-holiday blues: “The lull afterwards could seriously send me to like Lexapro land.” (06:04)
Host, encouraging the trip: "It's a great idea. Good for you." (09:04)

Ghost Hunters: The Holly Springs Police Investigation

[09:26 – 22:15]

Introduction of the Atlanta Ghost Hunters

Andy: “We are a group of...skeptics. We don’t go in trying to prove a property is haunted. We try and logically explain things...But our audio equipment tends to pick up what’s known as an EVP.” (09:49)

The Compound Investigation Teaser

Andy previews an upcoming segment about a club called Compound — something "wicked" happened there.
- Andy: “I screamed like a baby girl last night...I was scratched on my arm.” (11:22–11:30)

Holly Springs Police Department Case

Gina’s Testimony — Office Paranormal Activity

Officers and staff frequently hear:
- Footsteps and voices (mostly male, sometimes a female scream)
- Doors opening/closing by themselves
- Gina: “Some of them have heard actual voices...two male voices. One officer has heard...a female scream.” (13:02)
- Gina, the court clerk, confesses, “I have actually left my office because I’ve thought that there’s someone...and I go down there, and there’s nobody there. That’s usually when I pack up and leave.” (14:01)

Andy's Investigation Findings

Women’s Locker Room: Object thrown in the bathroom area, but nothing found.
- Andy: “Something was thrown across the bathroom area. Could find nothing. It was definitely a distinct sound.” (15:13)
Conference Room: Noises move around as people investigate.
- Andy: “Strange noises coming from one side. I’d move there, and the noises would start on the other side.” (15:15)

The EVP (Electronic Voice Phenomena) Reveals

"Go, Zach" EVP (17:51)
- Captured in the city manager/Mayor’s area. No employees named Zach.
- Elizabeth: “That sounds like it's one of you guys in the room speaking, just whispering in the microphone.” (18:10)
"Hey, they're here. Go." EVP (18:56)
- Melissa: “What freaks me out is when the ghost’s like, oh, the others are here.” (19:09)
"Screw all of them" EVP (20:07)
- Captured while packing up: hints of a spirit with a grudge against law enforcement, possibly tied to a fatal accident outside the building.
- Andy: “It sounds like to me — screw them all. Or screw all of them.” (20:07)

Discussion Points:

The team discusses spirits’ mobility.
- Andy: “We’ve caught ones walking down the street before. I don’t think they’re necessarily tied to any particular place.” (21:25)
Suggestion to research the name “Zach” with long-term staff.
Crime deterrent joke: Host: “If you get thrown in jail in Holly Springs, they can’t be held responsible for what happens to you — from Zach.” (22:01)

Memorable Quotes:

Gina: “I know I’m not gonna work here at night again.” (20:48)

Call-In: Is My Child Seeing Ghosts?

[22:41 – 25:06]

Caller worries about his infant daughter screaming and pointing at a corner, despite living in a new house.
Andy (Ghost Hunter): “I don’t think there’s anything to be scared about in any of these hauntings...Just remember, that’s your house...set the ground rules.” (23:10 – 23:53)
Host & Andy affirm that kids are more sensitive to paranormal activity because they haven’t been taught to discount those experiences.

Dating Disasters: Terry’s Messaging Meltdown

[25:33 – 42:07]

The Scenario:

Listener Terry anxiously waits for a guy to contact her. She breaks the show’s no-IM rule, messaging him multiple ways (IM, email, Facebook) after no replies.

Key Moments and Group Advice:

Host: “This is a little bit of that whole women have no game thing...You stopped your weekend just on the hope this guy was coming...Your first message...is sending up a flag.” (27:50 – 28:23)
Jen: “You’ve communicated now...in four different ways and you’re not getting the response you want. That’s the definition of insanity.” (32:12)
Hard-hitting listener call-in: AJ: “If she’s gonna call...she at least needs to follow the frickin’ directions. Get her off the air.” (33:11)
Classic “if he wanted to, he would” talk.
Joanna (another listener): “The more uninterested he thinks you are, the more he’s gonna want you...stop trying to get in his head...just play the game.” (38:07)
Team proposes: If the guy does respond, she should pretend all the messages were about inviting him to an epic event he missed.
Melissa: “Under no circumstances should you be the next person to send any kind of email or instant message or a text. Nothing. It is over at this point.” (39:24)
Host: “Your instant message friend: dead now.” (Grey’s Anatomy reference) (41:04)

Memorable Quotes:

Host: “Your patient is dead. Your instant message friend, dead now.” (41:04)

Haunted House Special Plans & Seance Debate

[42:13 – 50:38]

Show teases an upcoming haunted house live broadcast for Friday morning.
- Melissa: “Going to the haunted house doesn’t bother me...But it’s the calling upon them that bothers me.” (43:02)
Melissa expresses trepidation over participating in a seance.
- Melissa: “You don’t know what you’re calling to you...I just don’t trust what comes back.” (44:43)
Listeners and hosts debate the risks of inviting spirits, talismans for protection, and setting boundaries.
- Elizabeth: “Supposed to walk out of the house backwards.” (46:10)
- Caller: “Ask them to make their presence known to you so they don’t follow you home.” (49:22)
Host: “If you get lonely over the holidays...you can have a whole group of people with you.”
Upcoming event will be recorded inside one of Atlanta's most haunted places, with seance plans, spirit encounters, and a lot of team teasing about what’s safe and what’s just scary for show.

Notable Quotes & Moments (with timestamps)

“There's some sort of implied like pity or something on single people...It's almost like annoying and frustrating.” — Jen (01:41)
“If I sat home with my folks for that week, I would probably want to shoot myself.” — Jen (03:39)
"I screamed like a baby girl last night." — Andy (Atlanta Ghost Hunter) (11:22)
"Something was thrown across the bathroom area. Could find nothing." — Andy (15:13)
"Go, Zach is what we can catch out of that." — Andy (17:57)
“That's the definition of insanity, right? To keep doing the same thing over and over… and get the same result, but expect something different.” – Jen (32:12)
"Your instant message friend, dead now." — Host (Grey’s Anatomy reference) (41:04)
“I just don’t trust what comes back.” — Melissa, on doing seances (44:43)

Important Timestamps

Holiday Blues & Singles Chat: 01:18 – 09:21
Atlanta Ghost Hunters Segment: 09:26 – 22:15
Listener Questions for Ghost Hunters: 22:41 – 25:06
Dating/IM Drama (Terry): 25:33 – 42:07
Haunted House/Seance Plans: 42:13 – 50:38

Episode Tone & Vibe

Conversational: Fast-paced, real-life stories with plenty of sidebars and group laughter.
Supportive but honest: The show offers tough love, especially in the dating segment, but always swings back to support and empathy.
Spooky but light-hearted: Ghost stories and paranormal talk balance chills with irreverence.

For Listeners Who Missed the Show

This episode mixes comfort, laughs, and a few scares:
If you're single and dreading the holidays, you'll find camaraderie and some creative ideas.
Into paranormal investigations? The real EVPs and first-hand ghost stories are can’t-miss.
And if your dating life feels like a disaster, Terry's tale will make you laugh and cringe — and maybe rethink sending that third message.

Big plans are teased for a Friday haunted location broadcast. If you love the intersection of friendship, supernatural tales, and real talk, this is a classic Bert Show episode.