The Bert Show – Full Show PT 3: Monday, October 27 [Vault]

Release Date: October 27, 2025
Host: The Bert Show Cast (Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, et al.)
Key Guests: Ms. Cleo, Michael Clarke Duncan, Ms. Peach, Tracy, Dana

Overview

In this episode, The Bert Show team brings listeners a blend of humor, heartfelt moments, celebrity interviews, and real-life drama. The cast navigates everything from exposing bad parking behavior to candid conversations about illness and living fully, along with signature segments like “Second Date Update.” Highlights include an uplifting exchange with regular caller Ms. Peach, insights from the iconic psychic Ms. Cleo, a warm, funny interview with actor Michael Clarke Duncan, and a candid second-date drama involving mistaken signals and dating misconceptions.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Parking in Handicap Spots: Comedy Meets Justice

• [01:45 – 04:18]
  • The team debates how to handle seeing someone park illegally in a handicap spot.
  • Tommy considers letting the air out of the car's tires, but Bird and Bert advise against damaging property, suggesting public embarrassment instead.
  • Tracy jokes about just letting the air out (“Let the air out of his tire.” – Tracy, 02:29), but Bird points out this could actually worsen the situation for legitimate handicap drivers.
  • The segment devolves into playful chaos and mock arguments, highlighting the group’s banter.

2. Ms. Cleo & Ms. Peach: Finding Joy in Every Moment

• [04:21 – 11:28]
  • Ms. Cleo joins for an uplifting segment with Ms. Peach, a beloved listener battling a terminal illness.
  • Main themes: The importance of cherishing every day, the power of gratitude, wisdom on life and dying, and an emphasis on spreading love.
  • Ms. Peach: “I get up early enough every morning to see the sun rise. Yeah.” [08:34]
  • Ms. Cleo: “When you wake up and you go and you tell the people that you love that you love them… Don’t wait that long… Go tell that person today, right now, all of you listening to me, how much you love them.” [09:54]
  • The cast and Ms. Cleo exchange heartfelt reflections and affirmations (“You all have been so embracing and so loving. I just… I just can’t stand it.” – Ms. Cleo, 09:16).
  • The segment is deeply emotional but sprinkled with humor and warmth.

3. Celebrity Spotlight: Michael Clarke Duncan Interview

• [16:35 – 24:11]
  • The Green Mile and Planet of the Apes star calls in for a friendly, illuminating chat.
  • Topics discussed:
    • Dating etiquette – always pays on the first five dates, but appreciates the offer (“Even if a woman just offers…” – MCD, 17:05).
    • Life in Hollywood, including being a bodyguard for stars like Will Smith and Martin Lawrence.
    • Insights into on-set life, makeup for Planet of the Apes (“…anywhere from three and a half to three [hours] a day.” – MCD, 22:13).
    • Approach to conflict and confrontation (“…most of the time I just walk away.” – MCD, 20:18).
  • Ms. Peach pops in to declare her admiration: “I saw both the movies, the Green Mile and the Cedar House Rules, and I think you outdid Michael Caine like, a thousand times.” [23:21]
  • Light-hearted mutual invitations to visit Atlanta, jokes about Buckhead, and humility from the actor.

4. Signature Segment: Second Date Update

• [26:07 – 32:49]
  • Listener Odin seeks help after a promising first date with Wendy goes unanswered.
  • Wendy’s roommate, Simone, reveals that office rumors and Odin’s “gay vibes” (two male roommates, lives in Midtown, likes Backstreet Club, and has French poodles) led Wendy to believe he’s gay and not interested in women.
  • Discussion highlights stereotypes and misconceptions in dating culture.
  • Odin clarifies: “It doesn’t mean I’m gay.” [30:48] and fields questions about effeminacy.
  • The team offers both levity and support, with plenty of frank, comedic commentary (“Maybe you just need a more masculine woman.” – Bert, 32:20).

5. Sound Effects Challenge: Gender Banter in Studio

• [14:04 – 16:31]
  • Bird and Tracy compete in making mouth sound effects, leading to playful claims that some “guy things” can’t be matched by women.
  • The contest includes machine-gun noises, pistol shots, and car effects, blending classic Bert Show humor with friendly rivalry:
    • Tracy: “Throw me a sound effect. I can do any sound effect.” [15:06]
    • Bird: “See, guys can do that women can’t.” [14:58]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Let the air out of his tire.” – Tracy [02:29]
• “It’s not hard for smile, you understand? No matter what go on.” – Ms. Cleo [06:18]
• “When you wake up…and you tell the people that you love that you love them… Don’t wait that long.” – Ms. Cleo [09:54]
• “Even if a woman just offers that little me know that she is not selfish, right?” – Michael Clarke Duncan [17:05]
• “I saw both the movies, the Green Mile and the Cedar House Rules, and I think you outdid Michael Caine like, a thousand times.” – Ms. Peach [23:21]
• “Just because he has poodles, lives in Midtown and goes to Back[street] doesn’t make him gay.” – Bird [30:34]
• “Maybe you just need a more masculine woman.” – Bert [32:20]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:45 – 04:18 — Handicap Spot Parking Prank & Debate
• 04:21 – 11:28 — Ms. Cleo & Ms. Peach: Lessons on Life & Love
• 14:04 – 16:31 — Sound Effects Showdown: Guys vs. Gals
• 16:35 – 24:11 — Interview with Michael Clarke Duncan
• 26:07 – 32:49 — Second Date Update: Misconceptions and Stereotypes

Tone & Language

The episode is true to The Bert Show’s style: casual, irreverent, and full of heart. Emotional moments are met with compassion and honesty, while fun segments feature sharp wit and candid banter. The dialogue is laced with Southern charm, side comments, and a sense of family among both cast and loyal callers.

This episode provides a full spectrum of what makes The Bert Show a daily favorite—real talk, real humor, and real people sharing life’s big (and not-so-big) moments.