Full Show PT 3: Tuesday, October 28 [Vault]

Summary

The Bert Show — Full Show PT 3: Tuesday, October 28 [Vault]

Date: October 28, 2025
Podcast Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & Guests

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Episode Overview

This lively segment of The Bert Show blends classic morning show humor and authenticity with high-profile guest interviews, real-life drama, and comedic moments. This episode features exclusive studio visits from Atlanta’s own Collective Soul, pop star Pink, and Jessica Simpson, plus a hilarious “Second Date Update” and the show’s signature phone scam. The hosts and guests provide candid insights into celebrity life, career trajectories, music industry quirks, and the enduring challenge of staying genuine and grounded—while never missing a beat in the fun.

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Key Segments & Highlights

1. Collective Soul In-Studio

[01:44–09:40]

Highlights:

• Band Introduction: Ed and Dean Roland join the studio, reminiscing about their Atlanta roots and big hits like "Heavy," "The World I Know," and "Shine."
• Fame Reflections: The band discusses how being a rock star isn't as glamorous or different as many might believe.
• Recognition Encounters: They recount interactions with fans and maintaining approachability.

Notable Quotes:

• On hearing their songs on the radio:
  “When it first happened, I would always listen ... but I've learned to appreciate it. After that, I usually turn it—I'm too critical, I'll sit there and go, I could have done this better.”
  — Ed Roland [03:56]

• On music industry misconceptions:
  “People misunderstand sometimes ... it started in the 70s that, you know, it was very flamboyant ... no matter if you had one hit song, you had millions of dollars, and it's not necessarily true.”
  — Ed Roland [06:19]

• On record deals:
  “You pay them back, and when you make your money, they still don't let you own your music...you create something and yet you do not own it, even when you pay your money back. That's wrong.”
  — Ed Roland [06:56]

• Song Rights & Covers:

  • Discussion on who profits and who approves when others cover or remix their songs.
  • “If they don't change any of the lyrics and the music stays the same, they can cover it. But if they want to change anything, they have to contact us.”
    — Guest [08:35]

Memorable Moment:

• Dreaming of Puffy Remixing “Shine”:
  “Hey, Puff Daddy's covering Shine.”:
  “I wish he would. I get paid, remember, I need to be driven around.”
  — Ed Roland [09:36]

---

2. Pink Interview: Candid, Witty, and Down to Earth

[09:45–18:22]

Highlights:

• Venice Beach Life: Pink talks about living in Venice, embracing the vibrant and odd local scene.
• Lady Marmalade Video: She discusses working with other stars and initial tensions, particularly with Christina Aguilera.
• Rumor Mill: Pink directly addresses those infamous “kissing Christina” rumors with surprising candor and humor.

Notable Quotes:

• On her personality and first impressions:
  “I'm very aggressive...I think that scares people and intimidates them and gets them the wrong idea of me sometimes.”
  — Pink [13:16]

• On Lady Marmalade’s behind-the-scenes:
  “Everyone expected four divas to walk in the room. Me, I’m like, okay, where’s the Cheetos?”
  — Pink [12:30]

• Addressing tabloid rumors:
  “We were playing spin the bottle at 3:30 in the morning… I put my hand over her mouth and kiss my hand. And the next day, we’re bisexual lovers. So sorry to disappoint you.”
  — Pink [13:33]

• Celebrity changes:
  “Whatever you are to begin with is magnified as your life is magnified … good people become better people. Arrogant people become disgusting.”
  — Pink [15:16]

• On her upbringing and family:
  “The day I realized my parents were human was the day my life became a lot easier.”
  — Pink [16:04]

---

3. Second Date Update: Chris and Christina

[18:35–24:09]

Story:

Chris thought he had a great first date with Christina—dinner at Cheesecake Factory, then hopping around Buckhead bars—only to find she wouldn’t return his calls. The hosts track down Christina to get the real story.

Key Insights:

• The Drinking Problem: Christina reveals Chris went way overboard, tossing back 12–15 drinks, acting “loud and obnoxious,” and dragging her from bar to bar against her wishes.
• Uncomfortable Exit: Christina even tried to call a friend to help her escape the date.
• Chris Realizes His Mistake: When confronted, Chris admits he should’ve “played it cool” and not mixed a first date with a boys’ night out.

Notable Quotes:

• Christina calls it out:
  “Two to three drinks is nowhere near 12 to 15 drinks… Him and his friends were being so loud and obnoxious. Oh, I was so embarrassed.”
  — Christina [20:34]

• On forced fun:
  “I kept trying to bring the date to a close, but he wouldn’t let me off the date diplomatically … like, no, no, no, let’s go to one more spot.”
  — Christina [22:12]

• Host’s blunt advice:
  “Wait till the second date to get totally hammered, dude.”
  — Jeff [23:45]

---

4. Jessica Simpson In-Studio

[24:09–31:32]

Highlights:

• On Fame and Image: Jessica talks about how her style and comfort with her image have changed since her teenage years, revealing insecurity despite public confidence.
• Family Ties: Her parents play a hands-on role in her career—her mom styles her, her dad manages her, and her little sister is one of her dancers.
• Relationship Status: At the time, Jessica and Nick Lachey were "taking a break," but still communicating daily.
• “Fan” Encounters: Jessica describes a fan spelling her name in flowers outside her building, which was more creepy than romantic.
• Music and Collaborations: She highlights new singles and working with Atlanta’s Jermaine Dupri and Marc Anthony.

Notable Quotes:

• On personal shyness vs. public persona:
  “I’m super shy… I’m really shy.”
  — Jessica Simpson [25:44]

• On handling rumors and tabloid stories:
  “I just do what I do and try to do the best that I can.”
  — Jessica Simpson [29:20]

• On determined fans:
  “They spelled out Jessica in their flower bed with their flowers … So that’s just like, come meet me, Jessica.”
  — Jessica Simpson [30:19]

---

5. Phone Scam: Sick Cat at the Vet

[31:39–35:39]

Story:

An anxious “cat owner” (played by the show) hassles the veterinary receptionist with increasingly strange calls about his cat's noises.

Memorable Moments:

• The receptionist tries to remain calm and helpful despite the bizarre symptoms (“I don’t even know what end it’s coming out of, you know” [35:01]), only for it to end with the reveal:
  “This is Jeff with the Burt Show at Q100 radio.” [35:26]

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Collective Soul’s music industry gripe:
  “It’s like borrowing money from a bank, paying the house mortgage back. You pay it off, but yet the bank still owns it and they rent it out to other people while you’re still living there... That’s wrong.” — Ed Roland [06:56]

• Pink on authenticity:
  “My thing is I hate when people judge me and stereotype me. So I had to realize that’s what I was doing to everybody else. So I’m growing as a person.” — Pink [12:56]

• Jessica Simpson on stage presence:
  “I’m a different person out on stage...I definitely have a lot more confidence for some reason.” — Jessica Simpson [26:01]

• Second Date Update, brutal honesty:
  “No, Chris, I’m more interested in getting you into some sort of AA.” — Christina [23:50]

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Timestamps of Important Segments

| Segment | Timestamps (MM:SS) | |-----------------------------------------------|--------------------------| | Intro & Advertisements | 00:00–01:44 | | Collective Soul (Ed & Dean Roland, Interview) | 01:44–09:40 | | Pink (Interview) | 09:45–18:22 | | Second Date Update | 18:35–24:09 | | Jessica Simpson (Interview) | 24:09–31:32 | | Phone Scam: The Sick Cat | 31:39–35:39 |

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Tone & Style

The episode maintains The Bert Show’s signature blend: playful, candid, and often self-deprecating, with an open, conversational style whether they’re speaking to A-list guests or tackling awkward listener moments. The hosts steer interviews with curiosity and humor, often inviting guests to let their guard down and share real stories—whether about stardom, growing up, or just the hazards of a wild first date.

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For More:
Visit thebertshow.com or call 1-855-BertShow to participate or catch new episodes daily!

Transcript

[A]

Dude, did you order the new iPhone 17 Pro? Got it from Verizon, the best 5G network in America. I never looked so good.

[B]

You look the same.

[A]

But with this camera, everything looks better. Especially me.

[C]

You haven't changed your hair in 15 years. Selfies check please.

[D]

With Verizon. Get the new iPhone 17 Pro. Designed to be the most powerful iPhone ever. Plus a new iPad and Apple One. No trade in needed. Offer ends November 5th with a new line on Unlimited Ultimate Best 5G Tours. Route Metrics Data United States 2020, 25. All rights reserved. Additional terms apply for all offers. See verizon.com for details. So the other day I was in this group chat. Of course the topic turned to weight loss medications because it kind of seems like everybody's on one. One friend is already on one. Another is researching every option on Tick tock and someone else was like, I don't even know where to start. It feels like everybody is talking about it right now, but nobody really knows if it's right for them. That's why hers can be a great option for you because they take all the confusion out of it. You connect with a real medical provider who helps you figure out what's actually best for your body and your goals without the guesswork. If it's prescribed, you'll get medication as a part of a doctor develop weight loss program with ongoing check ins, dosage adjustments and 24. 7 online support. They've got affordable options from oral medication kits to GLP1 injectables starting at $69 a month. So if you've been trying to figure out what works for you, it might be time to check out hers. Whether you want to lose weight, grow thicker, fuller hair, or find relief for anxiety, hers has you covered. Visit for hers.comb to get a personalized, affordable plan that gets you. That's f o r h e r s dot com Bert for hers dot com Bert weight loss by hers is not available everywhere. Compounded drug products are not approved or evaluated for safety, effectiveness or quality by the fda. Prescription required. See website for full details. Important safety information and restrictions. Actual price depends on product and plan purchased.

[C]

Listen, it's the Birch Show. One of the biggest bands ever to come out of Atlanta, of course, is Collective Soul. Great hits like Heavy, the World I Know, Shine, but But the thing that really stood out for all of us was how they told us that being a rock and roller is really not a lot different than anybody else.

[A]

I think we've got the biggest guests that we've ever had in our studio today. Thank you. Not physically. Yeah, not physically.

[E]

Thank you.

[F]

Well, compared to Bert, though.

[E]

Been working on this?

[A]

Yeah, compared to Bert. Have you guys ever met Burt?

[E]

No.

[A]

You guys know Jimmy Baron, right?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

He's shorter, Bert. Shorter than Jimmy Baron.

[E]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. He's what, like 4 foot 2?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So he's bummed he couldn't make it. Collective Soul is in the studio. Well, part of Collective Soul, Ed and Dean Roland, thank you guys for stopping in. Thanks for having us, you guys. Oh, this is Collective soul, by the way, on the off chance that there's someone listening who does not know who collective soul is.

[C]

Declarations.

[A]

Yours is yours. My new leading. It falls on me. Don't sleep alone don't think aloud.

[C]

So she gathers free yeah, she come together now you let chill.

[B]

Haven'T let.

[A]

Your light shine down before that you.

[B]

Fight from the pain.

[C]

You request decorations.

[A]

Ed and Dean Roland from Collective Soul in the studio. Your life's work condensed down to one minute and four seconds.

[E]

Oh, we are done. Thank you so much for having us today.

[A]

You guys are done. You can retire.

[E]

I know.

[A]

Thanks.

[F]

I'm just curious, how does it feel when you hear your own song on the radio? I mean, I know you've heard all your songs a thousand times, but I'm just curious, how does it feel? How do you react to that?

[E]

You know, when it first. When it first happened, I would always listen because I would go, God, I could have sang that better. Or could have, you know, we could have played this better. And then I've learned to kind of appreciate it and listen to it. Just make sure it sounds decent on the radio. And after that, if I hear a song on the radio, I usually turn it just. Cause I know how it sounds. It's not like something I like the. It was exciting at first, but like I said, even when we put a new song out, if I hear it one time, I'll listen to it just to make sure the mix feels right. And after that, I. I'll usually turn it. It's because I hear it enough and I know. And plus, it's too critical. And I'll sit there and go, I could have done this better. Could have done this better.

[A]

You know, I'm fascinated by the whole celebrity thing. Like, it's fascinating to me because, you know, you guys, do. You guys, you're rock stars, you know, so it's like, how is it? Like, do you guys. Are you ever driving home and you want to go through a drive through and you think, you know what I Might get the recognition thing. I don't want to deal with it type of thing. Or. Does that ever happen or do you just.

[E]

Not at a drive through. But you do get recognized. But usually people are very kind and very.

[C]

Usually as simple, to the point.

[E]

Love what you do. And that's. That's it. And you go, thank you.

[A]

It's the most freakish thing anyone's ever done to meet one of you guys.

[E]

Ooh, that's not good. I don't. I don't know. That's. There's been a lot of.

[A]

Because they do it, don't they?

[E]

Yeah, it's kind of. Yeah, kind of. There's some strange.

[A]

Is it weird you out?

[E]

Yeah, a little bit. Just because, you know, we.

[A]

We are.

[E]

We feel normal, you know, in a sense, we are approachable. It's not like we make ourselves not approachable or anything like that. So you don't have to do anything strange. Just come out and talk to us. And we're usually very happy to talk. You know, it's. It's a compliment. And what.

[A]

When did you guys. When did you guys first realize that you've gone from, you know, just being a rock band in Georgia to like, you're like, we're rock stars. Like, when did that happen?

[E]

Like, when friends started calling, wanting to borrow money.

[A]

Really? Yeah.

[E]

You know what?

[A]

That's. I just talked to. I was just talking to Kim about the rookies on the Falcons who, you know, now are getting their first big paychecks, which compared to some football players, aren't that big. They're only talking, like 150, 200 grand, you know, relatively. That's not a ton of money. But these guys who, you know, three years ago were in gangs down in, like, Savannah who are now hitting it big and have people that used to be in their gang calling the Falcons office, leaving a message saying, I need 10,000 bucks or we're gonna come up there and talk to you about, you know, does that really. Do we have aunts and uncles climbing out of everywhere?

[E]

Well, we don't necessarily have.

[C]

We didn't.

[E]

We didn't come from gangs related.

[A]

Yeah. What gang were you guys in?

[E]

We're from the bridge, man. We are from the bridge. No, just. I just think people miss. Misunderstand sometimes because the perception of music in general, back from the set, I think it started in the 70s that, you know, it was very flamboyant, right? No matter if you had one hit song, you know, you had millions of dollars, and it's not necessarily true. You know, so I think the perception of what money we do make has been. They've been misled by the. By the media over the last. Over a lot of years.

[A]

So, yeah, you gotta get a couple albums into it before you're paying cash for the new copy.

[E]

Yeah, people don't understand you're borrowing money to make these records and you have to pay back the record company and they have a system down that's much better than the bank. You know, it's strange. You pay them back and when you make your money, they still don't let you own your music. Which is a big gripe I have. It's like borrowing money from a bank, paying the house mortgage back. You pay it off, but yet the bank still owns it and they rent it out to other people while you're still living there. That's what it means to me about masters. I hope I didn't get confusing on that, but it's really strange and I think that's wrong. And that's the only business I can think of where you create something and yet you do not own it, even when you pay your money back. So I think. Well, I don't know where I went on that.

[A]

You know what, that leads me into a question, because who owns the COVID rights? For example, Alien Ant Farm just did Smooth Criminal.

[E]

It's different for different artists. I mean, like Metallica, when they renegotiated their deal, they own their masters. They said, you know what? We're big. You give us our masters. That's why they had a problem with. And Dr. Dre and those people that do own their masters had a problem with Napster. Napster, because once again. And Napster's great for certain things, but I think it should be the artist's choice because it does take a lot of money. So if you. If you want to give your music away free and so be it. But as an artist, you know, you should have that choice. Somebody shouldn't be going, you know what? We're taking your work.

[A]

So who does. When Puff Daddy wants to, you know, remix Shine, who does he call? You guys? Record company.

[E]

That's the manager question. Who would he call? Oh, God, here we go.

[F]

Hello.

[E]

Oh, here we go. Open the Pandora's box.

[C]

No, actually, the way it works is if they don't change any of the lyrics and if the music stays completely the same.

[A]

Right.

[E]

If he just wants to cover it, they can go ahead and cover it. But if they want to change any.

[C]

Words or lyrics or music or, you.

[E]

Know, the arrangement and they have to contact us, and they have to contact Ed.

[C]

And then Ed can, you know, basically.

[A]

Approve that or not. That's how it works out. And they gotta get a clearance. If they do it completely. If they make it sound just like. They make it sound just like Shine. And they don't change any lyrics or anything.

[C]

Like an urban version of it and they release it.

[E]

Yeah, Dolly Parton did Shine and she kept. You know, it's the same melody. I mean, you know, it's the same song. It's just.

[A]

But do you get any money off of that publishing?

[E]

Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

Yeah. Ed gets all the money.

[A]

Thank you guys for coming in. It's Ed and Dean Roland of Collective Soul. Atlanta boys made it big. From the bridge.

[E]

From the bridge, man.

[A]

Collective Soul into his house. Listen for Shine. You know, that's gonna be on some website somewhere. Hey, Puff Daddy's covering Shine.

[E]

I wish he would. I get paid, remember, I need to be driven around.

[A]

There you go. Thanks a lot, guys.

[E]

Thank you again.

[A]

No problem. Collective Soul in the studio with The Burt Show. Q100. Listen, it's the Burt Show.

[C]

This is the Burt Show. She's probably one of pop music's hottest and upcoming stars right now. She's Pink. And she was due to stop by the station for about 10 minutes. But she was having such a great time here. She ended up staying for 90. And one of the things that we really needed to get out of Pink was to find out about the rumor between her kissing Christina Aguilera at a party. And she told us all about that. Not only that, but she showed us exactly what she did to Christina on Melissa Pink. This is Jeff Dollar over there. You know him from Philadelphia.

[G]

Yes, I do.

[A]

How are you?

[G]

I'm great.

[A]

Good. You live in Philly now. Where do you live now?

[G]

I lived in Philly. I went back to Philly when I left here. Now I'm an East coast trader and I live in Venice Beach County, California.

[C]

Oh, with all the freaks. Isn't it fun?

[G]

I love it.

[C]

For people that haven't been in Venice, explain to them what a typical Saturday afternoon looks like in Venice beach. On the boardwalk there.

[G]

The complete freak show. Yeah, it is so fun. All. I mean, all the homeless guys are my buddies.

[F]

They just.

[G]

They're all live out. I live 100ft from there.

[C]

Is that right?

[G]

And I got a puppy and a pool table. And it's way far out of Hollywood because I can't take it. I was at a club the other night in Hollywood, and there's all the L. A girls.

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

Oh, my God.

[F]

Yeah.

[G]

They're, like, also hot. And there was this homeless guy playing guitar outside. And I had a couple beers, and it was like 2 o' clock in the morning, and everybody was just trying to be cute, standing around. And I went right up to the guitar player and I gave him, like, 20 bucks. I was like, play Bobby McGee. He's like, all right. We're just out there in the middle of the street in L. A. Everyone's standing around like, oh, my God, I can't believe she's doing this. I'm just screaming at the top of my legs.

[C]

That whole scene is so not your. Is it? Who are the guys that. Trey Parker and What's the other dude that do South Park?

[A]

Stone. Matt Stone.

[C]

Matt Stone. He used to say when he first got out to Los Angeles and he was in the same place you were, you know, where, you know, people know who he is, but they just hate that whole superficial LA scene that he'd be at parties with all the celebrities and he'd go up and he'd fart on them.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

That was his way of getting back.

[G]

I love that next move, right?

[C]

Yes.

[G]

Whoopee cushion.

[A]

And explains why she wanted the eggs.

[C]

What's this protein diet that you're on? Look at you. You're so skinny now.

[G]

No, man, I gotta.

[C]

You getting all cut up.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

She's in Hollywood.

[G]

I saw myself in this video. I was like, okay, diet?

[C]

Are you kidding me?

[D]

You look great in the video.

[G]

Thank you.

[D]

You should have seen Bird drooling.

[C]

That doesn't seem like it'd be you.

[G]

This is the Lady Marmalade video.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah. You looked great in that.

[F]

So you talk about the Lady Marmalade video. I'm curious, with all those front liners together in that video, how was that? How was the.

[G]

Little weird at first, but I think everybody around us created the tension for us, I'm sure.

[A]

Oh, really?

[G]

It was. Yeah. Because everyone expected four divas to walk in the room. Me, I'm like, okay, where's the Cheetos? Let's have some fun. And Kim's awesome. Maya's awesome. Christina and I did not like each other at first, but she did come to my birthday party and that. That, you know, I felt flattered that she came, and I ended up talking to her for a while. And I think the reason we didn't like each other is because we have a lot in common.

[C]

Really? You guys are kind of the same.

[G]

People, the same stuff. No, I wouldn't say we're the same people, but we've been through a lot of the same stuff. And my thing is I hate when people judge me and stereotype me. So I had to realize that's what I was doing to everybody else. So I'm growing as a person.

[C]

Was there like a confrontation between the two of you or. It was just that girly thing. We know we don't like each other.

[G]

It's kind of like I'm a very aggressive individual and I don't hold anything back for anybody. I'm very, very, very outgoing. And I think that scares people and intimidates them and gets them the wrong idea of me sometimes.

[C]

Now then I heard all the reports that you were making out with her at a party. Now what's that all about, man?

[G]

It was a summer camp kiss. We were playing spin the bottle because.

[A]

Wait, will you tell us? Slower and quieter, almost. Almost in a whisper.

[G]

It was a summer camp kiss. His legs are underneath the table for a reason. Oh, no, no. We were playing spin the bottle at 3:30 in the morning and all the rich people had left, so.

[C]

Well, whose party was this?

[G]

It was mine.

[C]

It was your party.

[G]

It was my birthday party.

[C]

Okay.

[G]

And it was like 20 of us and I wanted to play old school games. I had drag queens come out and do Bootylicious. They gave Destiny's Child a run for their money. It was so much fun. And then I landed on Christina and her boyfriend was there and her boyfriend was like, yeah, yeah, I want to see him kiss. And guys, I put my hand over her mouth. Sorry to disappoint you guys. I put my hand over her mouth and kiss my hand.

[C]

Oh, really?

[G]

And then the next day, we're bisexual lovers. So sorry to disappoint you.

[C]

Dumber. Look, Melissa's crush.

[A]

Melissa.

[C]

Melissa is gay.

[G]

Yeah. I'm sorry.

[C]

So she was really bummed by that.

[G]

I'm sorry.

[F]

You can still put your hand over my mouth.

[C]

There he comes.

[B]

Bright red.

[A]

Hey, Melissa, remember. Remember when I told you after all the bad stuff happened, something great would come?

[D]

Don't worry about it.

[F]

What?

[A]

Jeff, remember what I told you after all, after your dad being sick and your cat.

[F]

Oh, the good.

[A]

And the kidney problems, the good stuff is going to begin.

[C]

Just started.

[F]

My life has changed forever.

[C]

Now, let me ask you this because I'm guessing because you're all down to earth and totally cool and you're eating your eggs while we're doing an interview, which I think is totally cool, but don't you think like JLO and Stuff was like that at one time. Mariah Carey was like that. And somewhere along the way, because you probably have a million. Yes. People around you that you just lose it, you lose perspective.

[G]

My theory is that whatever you are to begin with is magnified as your life is magnified. And as you become the public eye, I think good people become better people. Arrogant people become disgusting.

[C]

How old are you?

[G]

22.

[C]

And you seem like you've got like your wise, like a 50 year old.

[G]

From hanging out with my dad. I never had friends my own age.

[C]

Is that right? Yeah.

[G]

I'm very old, so.

[C]

Huh. And I understand that your dad's really, really special guy. I read a bunch about him yesterday. Yeah. What's up with mom?

[G]

My mommy. I love her to pieces.

[C]

God bless you.

[G]

But, but, but she's way too much like me.

[A]

Mm.

[G]

She kicked me out when I was 15.

[C]

Mm.

[G]

And since then we've been mending our relationships.

[C]

That's tough to get over.

[A]

Yeah.

[G]

But I understand. The day I realized my parents were human was the day my life became a lot easier.

[C]

Yeah. Wow. How can you be 22? I'm sitting here learning so much from you today. Was you. Were you just such a rebel that your mom couldn't handle you anymore?

[G]

I was hard.

[C]

Yeah.

[G]

I was. I was anti authority, anti rules, anti everything. But being a rock star, I mean, I used to tell my first grade teacher, what do you mean homework? I'm a rock star. I don't do that. And yeah, I was. I was very one track minded. I was very much too old for my age. And I was ready to go.

[F]

And look what she became. Oh. She became a rock star.

[C]

Pink's gonna have to take off here in just a couple of seconds, but here's what I'm gonna do. Before you take off, I'm gonna name some artists and you just give me impressions, okay?

[A]

Okay. No, we want you to sing like them.

[C]

Okay.

[G]

Jeff's kidding.

[C]

He's just. Let's start with Britney.

[G]

Oh, baby, baby. Brittany is one of the sweetest artists I've ever met in my life.

[C]

Really? Ironically, I would have never guessed that. Yeah, I would have thought big old Beezot.

[G]

Nope. She is humble and sweet.

[C]

Really?

[G]

Yes.

[C]

Okay.

[G]

Unless she was just acting that way for me.

[C]

Mariah Carey. Whoa.

[G]

That's my impression.

[B]

Whoa. Whoa.

[G]

She's the reason I'm not signed to Sony Records.

[C]

Why?

[G]

She said I can say it. She said, I don't want a white on my label.

[C]

Did she really?

[G]

Well, this was when her and Tommy Mottola Were together back in 96, so.

[C]

I don't want to.

[G]

I don't want another white on my label.

[C]

Unbelievable. Wow.

[G]

Thank God she said that because I'm in the right place.

[C]

Yeah. There you go. It all works out, doesn't it?

[G]

Came right back to her, huh?

[C]

Carson Daly.

[G]

Carson Daly likes me this year.

[C]

He didn't like you last year.

[G]

He likes me as a blonde.

[C]

Oh, is that right?

[B]

Yeah.

[G]

How much does he, like, dig in the pink? I don't know, but he was nice to me.

[C]

Oh, he wasn't nice the first time you met him.

[G]

I don't think we were nice to each other.

[C]

Really?

[G]

Yeah.

[C]

Why do you rub people the wrong way when you first meet them? I didn't feel anything.

[G]

I won't use my sex to further my artistry.

[C]

Oh, then you're gonna have to.

[G]

And I won't. I'm sorry. Yeah, I don't really, like, throw my flirtatious. You know, I don't do that. I don't.

[A]

You're making out with Melissa a half hour ago. That's the only reason you've been here for an hour?

[G]

She already liked me.

[C]

Yeah, it has been, I mean, incredible having you in here. Very cool meeting.

[G]

Oh, you too. Sorry for the clammy ham.

[C]

No worries. Pink in studio today. Continued success. All right, we'll see you next time you're in Atlanta.

[A]

This is the bird show.

[C]

The truth is that guys don't know how to leave well enough alone. Let me give you a little bit of advice, guys. If a woman doesn't call you back for a second date, chances are pretty good. There's a great reason for that. But you guys don't get that. So what we do is second date update. Guy goes out with a woman, has a great time. At least he thinks he has a great time. But the problem is he can't get a second date back, A second call back. So what he'll do is he'll call us up and we'll place a call to the woman, asking her exactly why she won't call him back. We call it second date update. Chris had a. What he thought was a great first date with Christine, right? Mm. They went to Cheesecake Factory. They were gonna go see a movie, but he gets a page in the middle of dinner that all of his buddies are over at Fideaux. So he and Christine change their plans and start drinking down a Fido. Then I think you guys said you went to $3 Cafe.

[B]

Yeah, $3 Cafe.

[C]

And then you ended up over at Mako's. All right, we've got Christine on the other line. And again, we are going to beg her for total honesty, all right? So be prepared.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Hey, Christine.

[B]

Yeah, hey.

[C]

Hey, how are you this morning?

[B]

Actually, it's Christina.

[C]

Oh, Chris.

[B]

Yeah, I'm here.

[C]

Did you know it was Christina?

[B]

I thought it was Christine, but.

[C]

All right, that's where it may have all started, my friend number one. And Chris said you guys went out and had a great time in Buckhead a couple of weeks ago. And he can't for the life of him figure out why you won't return his phone calls. He said you guys did a little bar hopping, had a great time together, did a little dancing. He thought you guys, you know, he finally found a party partner.

[A]

Smooch at the end of the evening.

[C]

Little smooch at the end of the evening. And then nothing.

[B]

Nothing.

[C]

Nothing. Not a callback, nothing.

[B]

Where should I begin?

[C]

Oh, Christina, we wanna hear it all.

[G]

Yes, but please.

[C]

How come you can't. How come you won't call him back?

[B]

Can we start with the 12 to maybe 15 drinks he tossed back within the course of the entire evening?

[C]

Yeah, we thought this might be it. We thought this might be it. But he said you were right there drinking with him.

[B]

No, no, I thought you were drinking a little bit. Two to three drinks is nowhere near 12 to 15 drinks. Huh? I'm looking at this guy like, okay, he can't be serious. The date started out okay. We went to Cheesecake Factory, had a nice time there. Then he gets a page from some of his friends or whatever and they're like, oh, you know, come down, check us out or whatever. We're at Mako's. I'm just sitting there looking at this guy like, I know he's not getting, like completely drunk out of his mind on this date. Him and his friends were being so loud and obnoxious. I mean, I was. Oh, I was so embarrassed. I kept trying to get off of the date, but he wouldn't let. I kept trying to leave, you know, like, oh, you know, thanks for. I had a really good time. I kept trying to bring the date to a close and he's like, no, no, no, let's go to one more spot. No, no, no. And I'm just looking at him in the like, no, this can't be a first date. You get stone faced drunk. Never.

[F]

When did he start getting drunk?

[C]

I mean, was it right off the bat?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

From the first place that we go to. He ordered like three drinks back to back. The first one he just completely tossed it back like it was a glass of soda. All right, no problem. I figured, you know, everything thereafter, you know, you might want to take it a bit slower. But it just got worse. I mean, I was just trying to get loose, you know, and getting completely drunk. Drunk, stoned out of your mind are two different. It's one thing to be tipsy. It's another thing to be slurring and loud and obnoxious. Oh, and so not sexy.

[C]

After you go to Fado's and he talks you into going to Three Dollar Cafe. He just kept getting his drink on there too.

[B]

Yes. And like I said, I kept trying to bring the date to a close. Cause I'm trying to find a way for me to get out of this. I'm trying to just be diplomatic and just say, you know, okay, you know, I had a really good time. But no, he just, like, he would not let me off of the date. At least he wouldn't let me off the date diplomatically. Like, I just kept. Oh, okay. Well, you know, maybe we should get ready to go and. No, no, no more.

[C]

And then over to Mako's.

[B]

Oh, God, I am so been here. Christ.

[C]

What's that?

[B]

I said I'm sorry. Chris is a nice guy and all, but I just don't know about the drinking that.

[F]

So he had mentioned. He had also mentioned that you had disappeared for a little while.

[C]

Yeah. Where'd you go?

[B]

I had called one of my other girlfriends to help ask her to help me concoct a story to get off of the stage.

[C]

Can I get a word in here? Yeah, go ahead, dude.

[B]

You know, I thought Christina. Sorry about the name. Let me just say that off the bat. You know what? I guess you're kind of right. You know, in some ways we felt that, you know, Christina would come along, have a really good time, and it wouldn't get too crazy. But you know, I think whenever you go to Fideaux and Mako's and Three Dollar Cafe, I mean, but dude, it was.

[F]

I mean, it's one thing for her to come along, but you started out on a first date and then you made it into a guy thing.

[D]

That's like a six day material.

[F]

That's uncool.

[C]

You're probably gonna want to learn from this one.

[B]

Yeah, I think maybe instead of bar hopping, we should have just kind of settled down and played it cool for the first date.

[F]

One night with the boys and one night with your date.

[G]

Yeah.

[C]

Wait till the second date to get totally hammered. Dude.

[B]

Christina not interested in A movie. I mean, playing it really nice and calm for an evening. No, Chris, I'm more interested in getting you into some sort of aap.

[C]

All right, guys, we're gonna let you go.

[B]

All right?

[C]

All right, Christina, thank you for your honesty.

[B]

You're welcome. All right, thanks, Christina.

[C]

All right, man. Thanks a lot for calling. This is the Burt show. It's the Burt Show. Once again. One of the great things about listening back to these interviews with celebrities is that they're at a certain place in their life. And when we brought Jessica Simpson in, at the time, her and her boyfriend Nick Lachey were taking a big time break. Now, three months after that, they got engaged. But pretty interesting to hear what she had to say about him before the engagement even happened.

[A]

Now, your record guy just handed me this picture.

[F]

Yes.

[A]

Have a look at this, Melissa.

[F]

Let me take a look.

[H]

I'm definitely not wearing that right now.

[A]

Now, that picture, if you could paint. Can you paint a picture, Melissa?

[F]

Let's see, you have low cut jeans. I assume this is denim, kind of frayed at the top. And, you know, when I look at the top, it's, you know, you see your stomach, and it's more of like a native American feel, you know? You know what I mean? It's kind of like a Pocahontas top. And Jeff, is there anything you want to add to that?

[A]

Yeah, there's. There's a belly button there. And it's a belly button. Yeah, it's there. Now, this isn't the same Jessica Simpson that was around a couple years ago.

[H]

She's just older.

[A]

She's older and her genes are lower. Is that. Is that what happens when you get older?

[B]

Yeah, Exactly.

[H]

I was 17 years old when I first came out. You know, I 21. You know, I would not wear that walking down the street because I'm not confident enough. Like, it's fine in a photo shoot when I know that things can be airbrushed and.

[A]

What do you mean you're not confident enough?

[H]

And I can choose.

[A]

You get up on stage in front of thousands of people and you sing.

[H]

I'm super shy, like, being like. Like, you see me right now, I'm like, in a big jeans and a big sweatshirt and my hair pulled back. Like, I don't know. I'm really shy.

[F]

So you're super shy. Now, does that play a role when you go out on stage like Jeff was talking about, or.

[H]

I'm a different person out on stage. Not really like a different person. I'm still me, but. But I definitely Have a lot more confidence for some reason now, like, in.

[F]

This photo shoot, like, And I'm always curious about this when. When stars have to do photo shoots, like, for this or, like, cover of magazines or whatever. And let's say, you know, when you're shy, I don't. I can't see me trying to do a sexy pose for photographers. You know, in. You know, you kind of get your own world.

[H]

I know.

[F]

Yeah. So how is it? How do you. What? You know, they go through.

[H]

They turn on music, different kinds of music. You just kind of get in your own world. Like, you know, I don't really like doing photo shoots that much anymore. Like, at first it was fun, but now it's like. Takes forever.

[F]

Is it like when you see the movies, like.

[C]

Yep.

[F]

Yeah, baby pal. For me, baby.

[C]

That's great, Jessica.

[F]

That's good.

[C]

Yeah, keep that.

[F]

Keep that.

[G]

Yeah, it's exactly like that.

[C]

Huh?

[A]

Really? Yeah. What was the first time? Because there had to be a first time that one of your PR people, your stylist or somebody came to you with this outfit and said, let's try this one.

[H]

I was like, oh, no. And, you know, they always try to encourage you. And, like, I worked out a ton before that video shoot.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's no pressure there with that outfit. You're okay. And then. What about mom and dad, though?

[H]

Mom and dad are. They're actually not with me right now. They're not on the road with me right now, but normally they are. My mom's one of my stylists. She did my whole tour. And, like, she. I can't go shopping without my mom. Cause my mom always knows what looks best on me. Like, I'm not good. You know what I mean? Like, I arrived today. My mom. Mom would have never let me arrive here today in this outfit.

[A]

Really?

[D]

I'm rebelling.

[A]

Mom and dad are. I'm getting nuts. I'm wearing a sweatshirt.

[C]

Yeah.

[F]

And my jeans are over my navel.

[H]

No, my. My parents are super involved in what I. Everything that I do. My dad's my manager. My little sister is one of my dancers. She only has one more show with me because she's. She's starting to do her own thing. She's getting into singing, and she's doing lots of acting and stuff.

[A]

Really?

[H]

So.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

That's cool. How many. How big's your family?

[H]

It's just us four.

[A]

Your mom, dad, you and little sister.

[F]

Now, I read somewhere you have a pet pig. Is that correct?

[H]

Well, Nick adopted a pig for me For. For One of my birthdays. Basically, he saved it from becoming bacon. You know, it's not like I used to have a pet pig, but it uprooted our backyard so I couldn't keep it.

[F]

Okay.

[H]

And then we just decided to adopt one.

[F]

And more than one pig.

[H]

Yeah, I've had one more than one.

[A]

So what's the deal with you?

[H]

Her name's Brutus.

[A]

Are you. Are you and Nick, are you guys together? Are you just exchanging pigs? Are you apart? What's the.

[H]

I don't know right now.

[C]

Really?

[H]

Yeah, like, I don't know. I love him. I do. Like, I can't help it. But we're not really. We're not together as of right now.

[A]

That's kind of a bummer.

[H]

But we still. We still talk every day and like, I don't know, it kind of feels.

[A]

Like we think you're gonna end up like it when all said and done.

[H]

Oh, definitely.

[A]

Really?

[H]

Yeah.

[A]

You guys are just doing your whole space thing?

[F]

Yeah.

[H]

Well, I don't know. For some reason, like, six months ago, I felt like I needed it. You know, I guess it was like turning 21 and wanting to be independent.

[A]

And the genes are getting lower.

[H]

And they get lower.

[A]

Is it. What's it like when you, like, you know, you and Nick, you guys have an argument or whatever, you decide you need your space or whatever it is, and then you pick up that Inquirer, the Star or something like that, and they're like, there it is. Do you read that to see if they're accurate? Do you just ignore it?

[H]

I don't. I don't really read like, stuff about me anymore just because it used to, like on my last record, it used to really get at me, like all the comparisons and all the this and that, and I just don't even read it anymore. I cuz there's no point, you know, I just do what I do and try to do the best that I can. And.

[A]

Did you ever, like, in the beginning was like, cool, I'm in the Inquirer. Like, it was a cool minute.

[H]

Yeah, I know, of course. I mean, I love to be in magazines and, you know, that's when you really feel like things are going good. You know what I mean? When you're being talked about, of course. But I just don't always like to hear the bad stuff.

[A]

What's the most freakish thing someone has done to meet Jessica Simpson?

[H]

Well, actually, I have to tell you one thing that's pretty freaky. Like one weird, weird thing is that I live in Los Angeles right now. And I have. I live on, like, the 16th floor of, like, a condo complex type thing, and I have this big terrace. And we were out. Me and some of my friends were out on the terrace one morning, like, looking over or whatever.

[C]

And.

[H]

And there's a house below the building, and it has. They spelled out Jessica in their flower bed with their flowers. So you, like, look over, you see this big Jessica, you know? So that's just like, come meet me, Jessica.

[G]

You know, like.

[H]

Or, like, they wanted to, like, maybe freak me out or something like that.

[A]

So did you. So I'm guessing we had to have.

[H]

Somebody go check that out.

[A]

So I guess. And you probably said, I bet that guy who did that is pretty freaking hot. So I'm. So you threw all this?

[H]

Well, I got scared because I was like, you know, what if they have, like, a telescope or something and they can look up in my place?

[A]

Oh, yeah. Once they start messing with their garden, you want to run the other way. So we started to talk about the. The album. The album's irresistible first single was irresistible. And you did. You did a little something with Jermaine Dupree and Little Bow Wow right here from Atlanta. So that was cool.

[H]

Yeah, it was really cool.

[A]

And then the. The new single, Little Bit. Little Bit is going to radio right now.

[C]

Right?

[F]

Right now.

[A]

Excellent.

[H]

So third single is gonna be my duet with Marc Anthony.

[A]

Which one's that?

[H]

It's called There youe Were.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Look at that. It says duet with Marc Anthony on it. I promise you, Jessica, we will play every one of these songs a million times.

[H]

Well, thank you so much, because you've.

[A]

Been such an awesome guest. Thank you so much for coming in.

[C]

It's the vert show here. Birch Show.

[A]

You're about to go out of town, your cat's really sick, and you need to talk to the vet immediately. So what do you do? You call the vet's office, you talk to whoever answers the phone, and you let them hear your grossly disgusting sounding cat over the phone.

[B]

Good morning. I'm at Ethan McGregor Hospital.

[A]

Hello?

[B]

Hello?

[A]

Hi. Who's this?

[B]

This is Sarah.

[A]

Hi, Sarah. How are you?

[B]

Good. How are you?

[A]

Not doing too well here. Okay. Having a crisis. I'm about to head out of town, and I have a cat who is very sick, and I need to know if you guys, if I can bring her in right now or.

[B]

Actually, I'm just a receptionist. I'm opening up the clinic. The vet's not gonna be here for another 45 minutes or so.

[A]

Oh, so there's nobody there right now?

[B]

No, it's just me. Was that your cat?

[A]

My cat's choking on something.

[B]

What did you feed it?

[A]

I fed it nothing out of the ordinary.

[B]

And it's making that noise on its own?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

I mean, I don't know.

[B]

Well, like I said, the vet's not going to be here for another 45 minutes. I can give you his pager number, or I can page him and have.

[A]

Him call you, or what I want to do is I want to bring the cat in there right now if I could.

[B]

Well, no one's here but me, sir, and I'm not really qualified to deal with a sick animal like that. Are you sure you didn't feed him anything out of the ordinary?

[A]

I don't think so. I mean, nothing that I normally wouldn't, you know.

[B]

Okay, that doesn't sound too good.

[A]

Right. Is there a way that you could call the doctor? I'm packing. I gotta get on the, you know, the stagecoach to get down to the airport. You know.

[B]

I can page the doctor and have him call you, but I.

[A]

Can you. Can you call the doctor for me and just tell the doctor the situation?

[B]

Well, he's probably already on his way, sir. Like I said, he just.

[A]

Well, can you call him on his car phone?

[B]

No, I'd have to page him. I wouldn't be able to call him on his car phone.

[A]

Right, and when you page him, can you tell him what's going on, leave him a message and he'll call back?

[B]

No, what I would do is I would page him and then give him your phone number and he would call you.

[A]

Don't have him call me back because I'm running around here.

[B]

Do you have a cell phone that I can give him? I mean, I can't do anything for you.

[A]

I'll tell you what you can do. Why don't you do this. Why don't you page him back to the clinic and then I'll call you back? Can you do that?

[B]

Page him to the clinic and call me?

[A]

Yeah, page him right back to where you are, and then I'll call you in a little while to touch base, you know?

[B]

No, no, what I'm saying, sir, is that.

[A]

Hello, Sarah.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Not funny. This is not funny.

[B]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

[A]

It's just, this is my.

[B]

It's unusual to hear a cat belch like that. I'm sorry.

[A]

I don't think it's belching.

[B]

I'm so. What do you think it is?

[A]

Well, I Can't even tell what end it's coming out of, you know.

[B]

Sir? Sir, Pull your cat away from the phone, Sir. Hello? I don't believe this. Hello, sir?

[A]

Yes?

[B]

Are you there?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

What'd you say your name was again?

[A]

This is Jeff with the Burt show at Q100 radio.

[B]

Oh, my God, that poor kitty.

[A]

And of course, you've just been phone scammed.

[B]

Great. That is one sick feline.

[A]

We will.

[E]

We will scam you, you.

[A]

Dear virtual dude, did you order the new iPhone 17 Pro? Got it from Verizon, the best 5G network in America. I never look so good.

[B]

You look the same.

[A]

But with this camera, everything looks better. Especially me.

[C]

You haven't changed your hair in 15 years. Selfies check please.

[D]

With Verizon, get the new iPhone 17 Pro. Designed to be the most powerful iPhone ever. Plus a new iPad and Apple One. No trade in needed. Offer ends November 5th with a new line on Unlimited Ultimate Best 5G Swords. Root Metrics Data United States 2020 25. All rights reserved. Additional terms apply for all offers. See verizon.com for details.

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[E]

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