The Bert Show – Vault: 2nd Date Update Chris, Christina

Date: October 28, 2025
Host: The Bert Show Cast (Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy & more)
Segment: 2nd Date Update (Chris & Christina)

Episode Overview

This episode of The Bert Show centers on the recurring "2nd Date Update" segment, where the cast helps a listener (Chris) figure out why his date, Christina, won’t return his calls after what he believed was a successful first date. The segment reveals both sides of their night together—filled with bar-hopping, a mismatched pace of drinking, and a rapid unraveling of romantic interest. True to The Bert Show’s tone, the conversation is authentic, candid, and laced with humor and gentle ribbing.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

Setting up the 2nd Date Update

[02:17-03:10]

• Host sets the stage: Second Date Updates exist because “guys don’t know how to leave well enough alone,” and often seek answers when they’re ghosted after a seemingly great date.
• Chris recounts the night:
  • Dinner at Cheesecake Factory.
  • Page from friends—switch of plans, bar hopping in Buckhead: Fideaux, $3 Cafe, ending at Mako’s.
  • Chris saw it as a great time and is confused by the lack of follow-up from Christina.

Quote:

“If a woman doesn’t call you back for a second date.... Chances are pretty good there’s a great reason for that.” – Host (02:20)

Christina’s Side of the Story

[03:31-06:30]

• Name confusion right from the start: Chris mixed up her name ("Christine" vs "Christina").
• Christina details her experience: She was uncomfortable with how much Chris drank; estimates he consumed 12-15 drinks, compared to her 2-3.
• Christina describes Chris and his friends as loud and obnoxious. She attempted several times to end the date diplomatically, but Chris insisted on continuing the night.
• She resorted to calling a girlfriend to help her concoct an exit plan.

Quote:

“Can we start with the 12 to maybe 15 drinks he tossed back within the course of the entire evening?” – Christina (04:06)

“I kept trying to bring the date to a close and he’s like, no, no, no, let’s go to one more spot. No, no, no. And I’m just looking at him like, no, this can’t be a first date. You get stone faced drunk. Never.” – Christina (05:04)

Chris Responds

[06:42-07:24]

• Chris apologizes for the name mix-up and tries to explain his side. He admits that the night got out of hand and acknowledges he should have played it cool on a first date.
• He reflects that bar-hopping with friends might not have been the best move for a first date.

Quote:

“Yeah, I think maybe instead of bar hopping, we should have just kind of settled down and played it cool for the first date.” – Chris (07:19)

Candid Analysis from the Cast

[07:09-07:32]

• The cast jokingly reinforces the lesson: Save heavy partying for a later date and don’t turn a first date into a “guy’s night out.”
• Christina quips she’s more interested in getting Chris into a program (alluding to his drinking).

Quote:

“One night with the boys, and one night with your date.” – Commentator (07:24)
“No, Chris, I’m more interested in getting you into some sort of AA.” – Christina (07:36)

Notable Quotes and Moments (with Timestamps)

• Dating wisdom:

  “If a woman doesn’t call you back for a second date.... Chances are pretty good there’s a great reason for that.”
  (Host, 02:20)

• Drinking disparity:

  “Two to three drinks is nowhere near 12 to 15 drinks.”
  (Christina, 04:19)

• Date rescue:

  “I called one of my other girlfriends to help... Ask her to help me concoct a story to get off of this date.”
  (Christina, 06:35)

• Lesson learned:

  “I think maybe instead of bar hopping, we should have just kind of settled down and played it cool for the first date.”
  (Chris, 07:19)

• Cast’s comic punchline:

  “Yeah, wait till the second date to get totally hammered, dude.”
  (Host/Commentator, 07:27)

Important Timestamps

• Segment Start & Problem Setup: 02:17-03:10
• Christina’s Full Recap: 03:31-06:30
• Chris Responds: 06:42-07:24
• Group Wrap-up and Lessons: 07:24-07:46

Tone and Style

The segment is conversational, empathetic, and sprinkled with lighthearted banter. The cast maintains a supportive environment, allowing both parties to share their side, while also pointing out the clear social faux pas in a way that’s funny but constructive.

Summary Takeaways

• Lesson for Date Planners: Don’t drink excessively, especially on a first date, and don’t rope your date into your buddies’ hangout.
• Communication Counts: Even a simple mix-up like getting someone’s name wrong sets a negative tone.
• Show’s Approach: Honest, direct, but with a sense of humor—the show’s hallmark for handling awkward dating situations.

This episode’s "2nd Date Update" gives listeners a frank, funny look at how first date missteps can derail budding connections, and offers gentle wisdom for navigating early romance.