Vault: 2nd Date Update - Robert & Elisha

Summary

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The Bert Show: Vault – 2nd Date Update: Robert & Elisha

Podcast Host: The Bert Show (Bert Weiss, Jeff, Knox, Dave, et al.)
Date: October 29, 2025
Episode Focus: A classic “Second Date Update” that takes an unexpectedly awkward and jaw-dropping turn when the real reason for radio silence after a successful date comes out.

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Overview:

This episode dives into the well-loved segment "Second Date Update," where listeners get help uncovering why a promising first date didn’t lead to a second one. This time, it’s Alicia (also transcribed as Elisha) who reaches out baffled after spending an amazing, intimate evening with Robert, only to be ghosted. What unfolds is an accidental family connection so cringe-worthy that even the hosts are left speechless.

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Key Discussion Points & Timeline

1. Setting the Scene – Why Didn’t Robert Call Back?

[01:48] – [03:14]

• Bert Weiss introduces the situation: Alicia and Robert go out, date goes great, they spend an entire night together, he leaves at 6 AM, and she never hears from him again.
• Alicia calls in for answers. Bert assures her: “With your permission, we're gonna beg him for total honesty.”

  “I'd rather know the ugly details than just have this thing open-ended.” — Bert Weiss (02:32)

2. Robert’s Reluctant Honesty

[03:14] – [04:45]

• Robert initially refuses to reveal the reason live, fearing widespread embarrassment:

  “I'm absolutely not going to say it on the air. If you start, you know, kind of pushing me on it too, I'll just, I'm just gonna warn you right now, I'll just hang up.” — Robert (03:32)

• He does offer to share the story off-air, permitting hosts to relay it if Alicia is OK with it.

3. Off-Air Revelation & The Shocking Family Twist

[05:20] – [07:01]

• After a short off-air discussion, the group comes back:
  • Alicia, sounding devastated, reveals:

    “Yeah, it sucks. Yeah, it was my cousin...we had sex.” — Alicia (05:47)

  • The realization hits the entire group in real time. One co-host sums up the confusion:

    “She was going to be on the air. She knew she was going to be on the air. Was she talking to somebody else?” — Burt Weiss (06:14)

• The hosts piece together what happened: Robert’s brother informed him, after the fact, that Alicia is in fact his cousin—his mom’s sister’s child.

4. Hosts Unpack the Family Tree

[06:18] – [07:50]

• The hosts try to map out how this familial connection was missed:

  “His parents got separated when they were very young… so he has some sort of step family that he's close to.” — Burt Weiss / Alicia (06:39–07:01)

• They speculate that Robert didn’t recognize Alicia as family due to estrangement.

5. Listeners Call In with Their Own Awkward Family Stories

[07:51] – [09:59]

• Dave calls in with a personal story about his own accidental cousin encounters, describing a deeply awkward experience:

  “When I was about 15, I had sex with two of my first cousins...We used to do it in the basement of my grandparents’ house.” — Dave (07:58)

• He follows up with another story about a friend who unwittingly dated his own father.

  “My boy is my dad. Because he never actually met his real father…they have been dating for a year.” — Dave (09:00)

6. Comic Relief in the Aftermath

[09:44] – [09:53]

• Co-hosts try to lighten the mood as they process the revelations:

  “When he calls him daddy, he's really meaning that.” — Jeff & Dave (09:46–09:50)

  • The group exchanges rapid-fire jokes and incredulous laughter, trying to bring the energy back after the bombshell(s).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Robert’s Boundaries:
  “I'm absolutely not going to say it on the air...I'll just hang up, you know.” — Robert (03:32)

• Alicia’s Realization:
  “Yeah, it sucks. Yeah, it was my cousin. Yeah. And I. I didn't tell him, but...we had sex.” — Alicia (05:47)

• Hosts’ Shock:
  “Oh, Alicia. Alicia. Alicia.” — Burt Weiss (05:47) “His brother says, do you know who you were out on a date with? That was mom's sister's kid.” — Alicia (07:01)

• Listener Dave’s Wild Call:
  “Well, when I was about 15, I had sex with two of my first cousins.” — Dave (07:58)

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Tone and Style

The Bert Show delivers their signature mix of real talk and humor—keeping things breezy even as the story descends into jaw-dropping territory. The hosts react with genuine surprise, empathy, and, eventually, comic relief to help the audience process what just went down.

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Important Timestamps

• [01:48]: Introduction of the Second Date dilemma
• [03:14]: Robert’s live call; refusal to reveal on air
• [05:47]: Alicia’s bombshell about accidentally sleeping with her cousin
• [06:18]: Hosts unpack family tree confusion
• [07:58]: Listener call-ins with their own wild family revelations

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Summary

This “Second Date Update” quickly goes from standard radio bit to deeply awkward family drama when Alicia discovers her great date with Robert ended in an accidental familial hookup. The revelation is so shocking it leaves both the hosts and listeners speechless—and then amused—once they recover. If you love radio that’s equal parts hilarious and outrageous, this episode of The Bert Show delivers it in spades.

Transcript

[Knox]

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[Burt Weiss]

Hey the Bird Show. This by far is my favorite second date update. She goes out on a great date with him and can't figure out why there hasn't been a second date. No callback, nothing after you hear this, there's an obvious reason why the dude was just too embarrassed to call her back. So she goes out with Robert. They go out, they have Drinks, they have dinner, they have a great night. They get back to her place at midnight and he leaves at 6 in the morning.

[Dave]

How you doing?

[Alicia]

How are you?

[Burt Weiss]

What's going on? All right. Walk of shame. And she's been waiting on a phone call from Robert that just hasn't happened. So what we're gonna do here, Alicia, with your permission, is give him a call and we are gonna beg him for total honesty. Right.

[Alicia's Friend]

Okay.

[Burt Weiss]

Now, when you made the call to us, what you're saying to us is I'd rather know the ugly details.

[Jeff]

Right.

[Burt Weiss]

Rather than just have this thing open ended.

[Alicia's Friend]

Right.

[Burt Weiss]

Is that true? Still there, Alicia?

[Alicia's Friend]

Yeah. Okay, freaked us out there for a sec.

[Burt Weiss]

We'll get him on the phone and he's gonna know you're on.

[Alicia's Friend]

Okay, Bert, what's his name?

[Burt Weiss]

And we're open dialogue, we'll open conversation.

[Alicia's Friend]

I was wondering if you knew.

[Burt Weiss]

Yeah, why are you asking me what his name is?

[Knox]

That was.

[Alicia]

It's like asking for directions.

[Robert]

Hello?

[Burt Weiss]

Hi, is this Robert?

[Robert]

Yes, it is.

[Burt Weiss]

Robert, this is Burt Weiss calling from Q100 radio and we're on the air right now and we have Alicia with us, right? You know?

[Robert]

Yeah, I do, yeah.

[Burt Weiss]

Oh, cool. Hey, thanks for that. You're not such a bad guy. You know, she is just wondering why there's been no second date. Because she said she just had this incredible time with you. You guys spent like 12 hours together. You split at 6 in the morning and she's got no call back and she just wants to know why. What's up?

[Robert]

Well, yeah, you know, it was a great date, but. And I guess I can tell you guys, I definitely don't want to tell you this on the air. And you know, if you go off the air with me and I'll tell you, and that's cool, but I'm absolutely not going to say it on the air. And, you know, if you start, you know, kind of pushing me on it too, I'll just, I'm just gonna warn you right now, I'll just hang up, you know.

[Alicia]

Are you not gonna say it on the air because you don't want to hurt Alicia?

[Robert]

Well, there's a couple. Yeah, well, there's a lot of reasons. There's a lot of people I don't want to hurt. So, you know.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Alicia]

Because Alicia is cool with it.

[Robert]

Yeah, I know. I mean, and I don't. I'm not afraid to tell her. It's just not really something I really want to discuss on the air. And honestly, you know, if we talk about it off the air, and she wants to come back on and talk about it with your listeners. That's fine with me.

[Burt Weiss]

So we can talk to you about it off the air and then tell Alicia on the air why you didn't call back.

[Robert]

Yeah.

[Alicia]

Does it bother you at all that you're kind of ruining a radio bit right now?

[Burt Weiss]

Hey, Alicia, are you cool with that if we talk to him off the air and find out what's going on?

[Alicia's Friend]

Yeah, that's cool.

[Burt Weiss]

And then we just tell you.

[Alicia]

We'll talk to both of them off.

[Burt Weiss]

Is that cool?

[Alicia's Friend]

Yeah.

[Burt Weiss]

Okay with you guys? Hold on. We'll find out what's up.

[Knox]

Okay.

[Burt Weiss]

All right, hold on. Alicia?

[Alicia]

Alicia?

[Burt Weiss]

Alicia. Alicia, are you okay?

[Alicia's Friend]

Did you hear that?

[Burt Weiss]

Alicia?

[Alicia's Friend]

Alicia, did you hear that?

[Burt Weiss]

Did I hear what?

[Alicia's Friend]

Yeah, I was talking. Yeah, did you heard it, Alicia? Yeah, I just. Yeah, it sucks. Yeah, it was my cousin. Yeah. And I. I didn't tell him, but I didn't say it on the radio. But we. We had. We had sex. Yeah.

[Burt Weiss]

Oh, Alicia. Alicia. Alicia.

[Alicia's Friend]

Hello?

[Burt Weiss]

Hi. Hi, it's Bert.

[Alicia's Friend]

Hi.

[Jeff]

We.

[Burt Weiss]

We. We.

[Alicia]

We're back on the air.

[Burt Weiss]

We're back on the air now.

[Alicia's Friend]

You know, I don't know. I don't want to talk about this anymore. Okay. You know. Okay. Okay. Okay. Bye.

[Burt Weiss]

See you.

[Knox]

Okay.

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Burt Weiss]

She was going to be on the air. She knew she was going to be on the air. Was she talking to somebody else?

[Alicia's Friend]

What did she say to him?

[Knox]

That second part?

[Jeff]

Now, she said for people who, you know, if you heard what she just said to whoever she was saying. What were the words? She said, he was my cousin. Yeah, that's.

[Burt Weiss]

She said, I didn't say this on the air, but, you know, they also did it.

[Jeff]

But then they did it all. They did the.

[Alicia's Friend]

Jeff, the Donkey.

[Dave Dufour]

Donkey.

[Burt Weiss]

Here's what we could. He. He came on and he said that. I'm really a little bit confused by the whole family tree thing here. That his parents got separated when they were very young.

[Alicia]

Here's the deal. He went out with Alicia. They had a great date.

[Burt Weiss]

Oh, my God.

[Alicia]

He obviously comes back to his house after the date, calls up his brother, whatever the brother's name was. What was his brother's name?

[Jeff]

I can't remember.

[Alicia's Friend]

I don't know.

[Alicia]

Calls up the brother's name. I think I know what it is, but I want to say it on the air. So he calls brother. He's like, hey, let me tell you about this great date I had. And brother says, do you know who you were out on a date with that was mom's sister's kid. So obviously brother is closer to mom.

[Jeff]

Than this guy, and this guy is.

[Alicia]

Closer to mom because the guy that we had on the air said my parents got divorced when I was very young. So he obviously has some sort of step family that he's close to.

[Knox]

Right.

[Jeff]

So we assumed that he had no relationship with his mom based on the conversation. And his blood brother told him, well, you know what, you hooked up with your cousin.

[Alicia]

So then to add another twist to it, then we pick up Alicia again to tell her to find out what she's thinking about. She's obviously on her cell phone or something with a friend of hers talking about what just happened on the radio and ends that conversation by saying, I'll call you later. But I didn't say this on the radio. We had sex.

[Burt Weiss]

Morning, Q100.

[Dave]

Hey, my name is Dave.

[Burt Weiss]

Hey, Dave. What's going on, dude?

[Dave]

Well, I just heard you guys in your conversation with that date and the cousins, right?

[Burt Weiss]

Alicia and Robert.

[Dave]

Yeah. Well, when I was about 15, I had sex with two of my first cousins.

[Burt Weiss]

Did you know who she was when you slept with her?

[Alicia]

Yeah, man.

[Dave]

We used to do it in the basement of my grandparents house.

[Burt Weiss]

Oh, you're making this up.

[Dave]

Yeah, I promise, I promise. We all used to live together in one big house. It was me, my mother, my brother, my sister, my cousins, my aunt, my uncle, my grandmother, and my grandfather. And we all shared like a basement, you know, it was like a two story house with a full basement. This happened in New York and yeah, man, we were, we were just, we were just having them. I almost got caught.

[Burt Weiss]

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

[Jeff]

This happened where?

[Dave]

In New York?

[Jeff]

Okay.

[Burt Weiss]

Really? There you go, Jeff. All right, Dave, hold on a second. We're gonna get your number, my friend, and we're gonna give you the special phone number. All right, Chris.

[Dave]

All right. Actually, when I first moved to Atlanta, I befriended this kid and he was dating this guy who was much older than he was. They were dating for like a year. And the guy was really cool, nice guy. And Mark had, or actually, I'll keep his name quiet, had actually decided to take him home to meet his mom like during the holidays.

[Alicia's Friend]

Oh my God.

[Dave]

And when he came back, he was a little distraught. I was like, what is going on? He was like, my boy is my dad. Because he never actually met his real father.

[Burt Weiss]

Oh my God.

[Dave]

And they have been like dating for a year. And the sick thing is, and we're still not friends. They're still together.

[Burt Weiss]

Oh my gosh. Really?

[Jeff]

Yeah. What was that? I'm curious. How did he describe when he brought.

[Burt Weiss]

Him home to his mom?

[Alicia]

That's what's called a priceless saw him?

[Dave]

I have no idea. All I remember is like him saying how excited he was. You know, they had been together for a long time and he was like, you know, this guy really cares a lot about me. When I found that out, I was like, well, I'm sure he does. He has that nurturing father figure going on, right. And heart.

[Jeff]

So when he calls.

[Knox]

He really did.

[Jeff]

When he calls him daddy, he's really meaning that.

[Dave]

I think so. Who's your daddy?

[Jeff]

I am.

[Dave]

Who's your daddy?

[Burt Weiss]

I am. Oh, really?

[Jeff]

I am.

[Robert]

Oh my God.

[Burt Weiss]

Unbelievable. All right.

[Dave]

It was too weird.

[Burt Weiss]

Thanks, man. Hey, the Bird Show.

[Knox]

Hi, this is Knox from the podcast with Knox and Jamie. And maybe like us at the podcast, you also know people who have been smokers or vapers and Zen is the one product it seems like everyone is talking about because there are many good reasons to make a change to Zen nicotine pouches. Reasons like Zen Nicotine pouches are still America's number one choice for smoke free hands free nicotine satisfaction. And you can choose between 10 varieties, each variety available in either 3 or 6 milligrams. Check out zen.com find to find Zen at a store near you. Warning. This product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical.

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[Knox]

Here's a show that we recommend.

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