Vault: A Mom Called In Alarmed After Discovering What Her Daughter's Friend Is Pressuring Other Girls to Do

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bert Show

Episode: Vault: A Mom Called In Alarmed After Discovering What Her Daughter's Friend Is Pressuring Other Girls to Do

Date: April 3, 2026
Hosts & Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and the Bert Show Cast
Key Guest/Caller: "Hannah" (pseudonym, featured caller)

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Main Theme & Purpose

This emotionally intense episode centers on a mother's alarming discovery about her 10-year-old daughter's friend. The friend has been pressuring other girls into sexual conversations and potentially behaviors that are far beyond their age. The conversation dives into confronting adult issues affecting children, the responsibilities of parents (and schools), and how to act when a child may be experiencing or witnessing abuse. The hosts, other parents, and audience members weigh in to advise on the safest and most effective actions.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Initial Call: Hannah’s Disturbing Discovery

• [01:32] Host introduces "Hannah," who wishes to use a voice disguiser due to the sensitive nature.

• Hannah says her close relationship with her daughter led her daughter to confide disturbing information:

  • Her daughter’s best friend, age 10, claims to have had sex with multiple people.
  • Hannah describes feeling “appalled” and “disgusted.”
  • She consulted her husband before approaching the other child's mother due to past confrontations.

• Hannah explains prior issues with this mother, including an incident where the friend encouraged Hannah’s daughter to skip school ([03:29]).

  Hannah ([02:24]): "She [my daughter] basically said to me that her best friend just confided in her that she's had sex more than once with more than one person. So immediately, I was appalled. I was disgusted."

2. Characterizing the Mother of the Friend

• [03:24]–[04:41] Hannah recounts a prior incident where she confronted the friend’s mother, who reacted aggressively and refused to believe her child could do wrong.
• The friend's mother previously accused Hannah of making trouble and requested she mind her own business.

  Hannah ([04:13]): "...get your facts straight before you come and tell me anything about my child."

3. The Gravity of the Situation

• [05:19]–[06:08] Hannah’s main concern is for the children’s wellbeing:

  • She was forced to explain topics such as hickeys and oral sex to her 10-year-old—subjects she felt were too advanced for her daughter.
  • Hosts and callers recognize this as an “adult issue” outside the normal range of childhood disputes.

  Host (Bert) ([06:08]): "I just want to get you guys into the mentality of this 10 year old for a second... this little 10 year old girl approaches our listener here's daughter and her daughter says, no, that's nasty. So her 10 year old friend says, don't be scared if you don't want to have sex, you can just suck it if you want."

4. Approaching the School (Guidance Counselor) vs. the Other Parent

• [07:13]–[07:50] The cast and callers suggest the school’s guidance counselor as the best course of action, rather than speaking to the other mother again. They stress:

  • The counselor is trained for such situations.
  • Escalating through proper authorities protects both children and potentially identifies abuse.

  Co-host ([07:26]): "If there's a counselor at the school, she is equipped or he would be equipped to... handle this situation."

5. Caller Stories & Deeper Psychological Layers

• [08:06] Haley (Caller): Shares a similar story about her own daughter’s friend revealing traumatic abuse, which, upon investigation, traced back to issues in that friend's family. Counseling and school authorities were vital in addressing the matter discreetly.

• The group discusses the evidence that children acting out in this way are often being abused themselves ([09:00–09:17]).

  Co-host ([09:00]): "Children that are acting out in this way and talking about it in this way are most likely being abused."

• The hosts point to the broader issue of generational or family abuse and the tendency to “project” trauma onto others.

6. Managing the Friendship Going Forward

• Listeners recommend:

  • Cutting the friendship for the safety of Hannah’s child ([09:39]).
  • Not teaching her daughter to judge but to keep her safe while also advocating for compassionate intervention for the other girl.

  Caller ([09:53]): "There's a fine line because you don't want to teach your child to judge her... but there's got to be a way to bring those two things together. We need to get her help and somehow protect your kid."

7. Reporting and Mandatory Action

• [10:30]–[13:44] Discussion intensifies around the necessity of involving authorities:
  • Reporting suspicions to the school counselor is mandatory; schools are equipped to handle, investigate, and report to appropriate state agencies if needed.
  • Direct quote from a caller ([12:15]): "Call defects or somebody. Let somebody know. You just can't keep quiet about something like that."
  • The group reiterates that approaching the family directly is not recommended; rather, let trained professionals act.
  • If nothing happens at the school level, callers advocate reporting to state agencies (like DFACS), but most agree the school counselor is the best first step.

8. The Prevalence of Child Sexual Abuse

• [13:51] Melissa (Caller): Shares her own survivor story and reinforces how common childhood abuse is. She warns of societal tendencies to shame or isolate trauma victims.

  • Cites statistics: “One in three girls under the age of 18 have been sexually abused.”

  Melissa ([13:51]): "The statistics on this is very overwhelming—one in three girls under the age of 18 have been sexually abused."

9. Resolution and Advice

• The unanimous advice from both the hosts and callers is for Hannah to approach the school’s guidance counselor immediately.

  Host (Bert) ([15:10]): "So if you are looking for advice from us this morning, this is actually one of the few times unanimous that we actually have real solid advice from most of the listening audience. Telling you there's only one thing to do here."

  • Hannah agrees: "And I will take that advice. Unlike some listeners, I will take that advice." ([15:28])

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I have been sick to my stomach.” – Hannah ([06:30])
• “The girl is in trouble. This girl is definitely in trouble.” – Co-host ([07:26])
• “You could be the one that could actually step in and do something and save this girl.” – Host ([10:09])
• “Call defects or somebody. Let somebody know. You just can't keep quiet about something like that.” – Hannah ([12:15])
• “One in three girls under the age of 18 have been sexually abused.” – Melissa ([13:51])

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment | |-------------|----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:32–02:24 | Introduction of “Hannah,” the situation, and her relationship with her daughter | | 03:24–04:41 | Prior issues with the friend's mother and earlier confrontations | | 05:15–06:08 | Extent of sexual topics discussed; parental discomfort | | 06:08–07:00 | Specific comments and pressure the friend put on Hannah’s daughter | | 07:13–07:50 | Hosts recommend contacting a school counselor | | 08:06–08:53 | Haley’s similar experience and confirmation of the school’s role | | 09:00–09:39 | Analysis of psychological roots; warning signs of abuse | | 09:53–10:09 | Protecting your child without judgment; the delicate line of action | | 10:30–13:44 | Consensus and process: report to the school counselor and, if necessary, state agencies | | 13:51–14:28 | Call-in stories from abuse survivors, the prevalence of child abuse | | 15:10–15:32 | Unanimous advice for professional intervention |

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Conclusion

The Bert Show’s discussion highlights the urgent need for adults to recognize, act on, and report signs of serious issues among children—especially those indicating potential abuse. The episode reaches a strong consensus: circumvent confrontation with uncooperative parents and involve trained school professionals, who can address underlying abuse and begin the healing process. The hosts facilitate a caring, serious, and actionable conversation that both supports the caller and educates parents on their responsibilities.

If you or someone you know suspects child abuse, consult your school's guidance office or local authorities.

Transcript

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[Host (likely Burt)]

Hannah here, we'll call her, wants to be on the voice disguiser. This seems like a slam dunk. Of course you go to the mom. Come on, man. 10 years old. I can't even imagine 10 years old. Hayden is just about seven now.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

It's just. Yeah, it's too young.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

Real seven or bird math seven?

[Host (likely Burt)]

No, it's like real seven. It's coming up before you know it, seven. So to talk about 10 year olds.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

Mm.

[Caller or Co-host 3]

So.

[Host (likely Burt)]

And I'm gonna warn you again that we consider this the adult portion of the Birch show, that if you have kids that are listening right now, this subject matter may be way too deep for them, but we assume that they're in school or what have you.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

Mm.

[Host (likely Burt)]

So it may get a little more graphic than you want. Alright, Hannah, you are on the voice disguiser.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

Hi.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Hi. How are you guys?

[Host (likely Burt)]

Good. How are you? Look, I don't want to read your email and miss a detail, so why don't you relay exactly what's going on with your daughter so we don't miss anything.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Sure, sure. My daughter and I are pretty close. Usually I tell her, tell mommy anything, and we'll work it out after that, but make sure you always tell me the truth. And she came to me, and she basically said to me that her best friend just confided in her that she's had sex more than once with more than one person. So immediately, I was appalled. I was disgusted, and I wanted to speak to her mom right away. I spoke. You know, at first I told my daughter, is it okay if I speak to your dad about it? Because I didn't want to betray her trust. I said, okay, sweetie, you know, mommy's going to discuss the daddies. It's okay. And she said, that's fine. So I spoke to my husband about it, and because we have had problems with this particular mom before, he's like, you know how this woman is. She has a very bad attitude. And I don't want trauma. I don't want problems for our daughter at school with her child. And I don't want, you know, problems with her, you know, seeing her. Her giving us an attitude.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Let's just go off on a little tangent here for a second. What kind of problems? Just to define the mom that we're

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

talking about here, her mom is one of those. One of those parents that, you know, don't tell me anything about my kid. Last year, she had asked my daughter if they can cut school together. Don't go on the school bus. Let's wait till your parents leave and we can hang out at your house. And right away, my daughter told me, because she's terrified. She's like, you know, I don't want to see them. Not cool, but I don't want to do it. So I spoke to her mom about it, and she got upset with us because she's basically saying that, you know, she went to her daughter and her daughter said, no, that's not true. She's lying. That's not true. And she basically said, get your facts straight before you come and tell me anything about my child.

[Host (likely Burt)]

And it could have been an attitude thing also. Just, okay, all right.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

So her child. Her kid can do. Her kid can do no wrong no matter what.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Exactly, exactly. So because of that, my husband, he's like, listen, you know, we got a doorbell ringing in our ear late at night, and I'm upstairs hearing her mother chewing into you, telling you to mind your own business. He said, if you want to go through that again, you're on your own.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

So she came over to your house after bedtime and confronted you in person.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

9:30 at night when she got home from work. And we're just hearing the doorbell ding, ding, ding, ding. I'm like, who in the world is that answered the door? And she was like, you know, first of all, let me tell you, I spoke to my daughter and she said, your daughter is completely lying. And I'm very upset that you even believed your child before even coming to me. You should have found out first before you opened your mouth.

[Host (likely Burt)]

This is about the ditching issue.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Wow. This is about the ditching issue. And my husband had to basically come downstairs like, listen, you guys are doing this in front of the house, why don't you come inside? She goes, no, I don't want to come inside. Tell your wife she needs to learn to mind her own business.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Okay, so then why don't we go ahead and progress now with your daughter's friend's story.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

So now with where we are right now, my husband basically said, listen, you know, stay out of it. And my thing is, I'm very concerned because, you know, this is an adult issue. This is not, you know, oh, we got into a fight at school, she pulled my hair. This is something that kids cannot handle on their own. First of all, I'm very upset because I'm, you know, after that first day, she's been repeatedly discussing things with my daughter. I had to be able to, I had to sit down, my husband and I, and give my 10 year old, you know, sex education that I didn't want to do. I had to discuss hickeys because she showed my child a hickey, you know, on her chest. I had to discuss oral sex, I mean, things that I do not want to be touching, you know, but I have to force myself to discuss this with my daughters. I'm serious.

[Host (likely Burt)]

I just want to get you guys into the mentality of this 10 year old for a second. So I'm going to read this line right from your email and it's pretty nasty. It says that, you know, this little 10 year old girl approaches our listener here's daughter and her daughter says, no, that's nasty. So her 10 year old friend says, don't be scared if you don't want to have sex, you can just suck it if you want.

[Caller or Co-host 3]

Yes. Oh God.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

I mean, I have been sick to my stomach. But I will say that I have a little update for when I spoke to your producer on Friday. One, the young lady's mother, her sister in law, And I have a, you know, more of a hello, how you doing? Relationship. So I approached her.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Okay.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

I spoke to her, and she even told me, oh, I don't know if you want to discuss it with her mom, because her mom, you know, she's not approachable.

[Caller or Co-host 4]

So her mom wouldn't believe you.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

She's basically. She's saying that she's thinking her mom would be so embarrassed because she said, you know, I don't want to start any problems, but I don't think her mom really likes you.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

Well, I met a Birchill listener over the weekend that is a guidance counselor at an elementary school. And so I'm curious, does your school have one?

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

I'm not sure. I was actually thinking of possibly speaking to the principal, because if you have

[Caller or Co-host 1]

a counselor, I would. I would see if there's a counselor first at the school, and that's who I would talk to instead of the mom. The mom's not going to be receptive to it because this. I mean, the girl is in trouble. This girl is definitely in trouble. And, you know, and I think as a parent. As a parent, I would be concerned about her even being friends with my daughter. But if there's a counselor at the school, she is equipped or he would be equipped to. How to handle this situation.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Exactly. Because I personally, I don't want her in my home until I know that she is getting the help and the counseling that she needs. I no longer want her around my child.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Here is Haley, who also wants to be on the Voice Disguiser. Go ahead, Haley.

[Haley (Caller with related story)]

Hi. I wanted to say I went through this with. My daughter was in the third grade, about nine years old, and it was. It was a little bit different. Her friend told her she had been raped. And my little girl came to me because she didn't know what that word meant. So it opened up that whole discussion. But I went. We were friends with these people. I didn't really know how to address it. So we did go to the school counselors that way, because once you report them like that, they have a duty to act on it. And as things progress, they didn't know that we were the ones instigated it. And they had a big counseling meeting with all little girls who had heard the story. But as it progressed, it came out that this little girl had not been raised by her little.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Her. Not her little brother.

[Haley (Caller with related story)]

Her older brother was being molested, and she knew about it, and she was taking on his.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Oh, wow. Yeah. I mean, this thing, psychologically is so much deeper than just a Mom to mom conversation, you know.

[Caller or Co-host 4]

Well, and yeah, I mean the children that are acting out in this way and talking about it in this way are most likely being abused.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Sure.

[Caller or Co-host 4]

I mean, it's not going on between 8 year olds or between 9 year

[Caller or Co-host 2]

olds if someone like she's got a serious 11 year old boyfriend, that they've been together for 5 years.

[Caller or Co-host 4]

Right. I mean they're, yeah, they're receiving some sort of abuse like she said, or you know, somebody in the family is.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

And that projection stuff thing is wild. Like.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Yeah. There are two calls that are coming in more than anything else and one is go to the guidance counselor. That's the one call. And then there's one that's obvious also that Melissa brought up. Hey, Aniston, go ahead. You're on Q100.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

If it were me and it was my daughter, I would just cut the friendship off and I would feel like,

[Haley (Caller with related story)]

you know, even if the little girl

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

did get help, you know, she's still always going to have those problems and I wouldn't want my 10 year old experience exposed to it.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

And to me there's a fine line because you don't want to teach your child to judge her, you know, so I mean, it sounds so harsh, but there's got to be a way to bring those two things together. We need to get her help and you know, and somehow protect your kid.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Yeah, there's a little girl that really, really, really needs some help right now. You know, there's a major white flag there. And if people aren't going and doing anything about it because of her mother, then her mom's hurting her on a whole bunch of different levels, you know, and you could be the one that could actually step in and do something and save this girl. And it sounds like the only avenue you can really take is go to the school counselors.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

That's definitely. I would take.

[Caller or Co-host 4]

It would be speculation to say something, but the mother may be defensive because there's a man in her life that she's defending or protecting who could be doing something to the daughter.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

I mean, I'm just completely, I'm disgusted because the fact that I went to her sister in law and she said to me I'd be very careful with that one because I know how she is.

[Caller or Co-host 4]

I mean, this is just the kind

[Host (likely Burt)]

of case where if you don't get involved, it is something that you will regret if something happens to that girl.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

There is something happening to that girl.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

That's what I'm telling my husband. It is my obligation as a parent to get involved. I don't care. You know, she doesn't speak to me anyway, so I'm gonna lose a best friend over this.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Right.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

You know, so I really don't care about that. I just don't want. I don't really. What I'm afraid of is even if it's brought to the mom's attention that she may beat the child, she may attack her in a way that makes her rebel, there's so many other things that can happen after. After, you know, it's exposure. It's brought to light that to me, this little child obviously is looking for attention and love in a place that she's not getting it. And beating her is not gon well.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

I mean, there's only so much you can do. But by going to a counselor, the counselor will talk to the child individually as well and is capable of doing that.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Right.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

And then maybe get to the bottom of what's going. Really going on in that house.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Hey, Tina, did you want to be on the voice discussor also?

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Yes. I don't know if someone has made my point yet, but there. It could be that the little girl is being molested at home and the mother may even know about it, and

[Caller or Co-host 3]

that's the reason she's so existent.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

I mean, call defects or somebody. Let somebody know. You just can't keep quiet about something like that.

[Host (likely Burt)]

You really can't. I mean, and that's what everybody is saying across the board. You just can't hold this just because of the mother.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

But I think that. I think that. But the consensus is not to go back to the family.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Right?

[Caller or Co-host 1]

That's. That's. You already know how that is. And I know that your husband's concerned. So that's. Don't go back to the family now. You have to go to. To the, you know, some person of authority.

[Host (likely Burt)]

I wonder if she. If you don't get any kind of reaction from the school administrators or counselors, she will. I wonder if you go to defects directly.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

She will. Because once. Once you report that to the school, like the earlier caller said, there's an obligation to follow up.

[Caller or Co-host 3]

Mm.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

And they probably. I guarantee you the school already has representatives at the government. Appropriate government agencies.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

Right.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

So the counselor would be the first step. Then they would probably call on this person. And then.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

And then it's out of your hands.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

And then it's out of your hands because they will determine the severity of the situation and handle it.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

And that's what counselors are there for. They're trained for Matters like this. So that's what counselors are in schools for.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

And I would feel more confident going to a school counselor rather than directly to dfax, because I just think that agency is so overwhelmed that folders get misplaced, things get lost in the shuffle from, you know, whatever.

[Host (likely Burt)]

And I think it's been my experience that they act very, very quickly, and then I think.

[Caller or Co-host 2]

But I think if you have the school counselor involved, that's another voice who will be following up and making sure that things stay on track.

[Host (likely Burt)]

I'm gonna take one more call, and then we'll move on, because pretty much everybody's saying the same exact thing. But go ahead, Melissa, you're on the Voice disguiser.

[Caller or Co-host 3]

Yes, hi. I just wanted to call because I'm a parent of an abused child, and I was also abused as a child myself, and I have gone to multiple support groups and all that, and the statistics on this is very overwhelming that one in three girls under the age of 18 have been sexually abused.

[Host (likely Burt)]

One in three.

[Caller or Co-host 3]

That's just of the cases reported a lot of front.

[Caller or Co-host 1]

Yeah. I had several friends that were. Mm. And they're. And they. Then they had this idea that their mothers didn't know, and in the end, they did.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Right. Well, my mom.

[Caller or Co-host 3]

My mom has just found out about my abuse, and I'm 24 years old, and it happened, you know, from the time I was in about second grade till middle school. And it was my, you know, a neighborhood kid. So, you know, it really. I'm glad that y' all are bringing this up and talking about it, because, like a caller said before about not letting the mother be friends with the child, that's the last thing that you want to do, because that teaches the child that that's frowned upon. And in society, we've made it so just horrible that this has happened to you when. And ultimately, it's never your fault.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Well, Hannah, I mean, you really got to get some advice from a professional at school. I mean, that's what everybody is calling and saying. So if you are looking for advice from us this morning, this is actually one of the few times unanimous that we actually have real solid advice from most of the listening audience. Telling you there's only one thing to do here.

[Haley (Caller with related story)]

Okay?

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

And I will take that advice. Unlike some listeners, I will take that advice.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Please do. Please do. Yeah.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Thank you very much.

[Host (likely Burt)]

Thank you for calling.

[Hannah (Caller with the story)]

Q100.

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