Vault: Are organizers cult members?

Summary

The Bert Show | Episode: "Vault: Are organizers cult members?" | June 5, 2026

---

Episode Overview

In this episode, the Bert Show crew dives into a fun and lighthearted debate: Are devotees of physical professional organizers (the paper kind, not the people) basically members of a cult? Prompted by Bert’s recent experience at a boutique organizer store, the team hilariously unpacks their thoughts on obsession with organization tools, the difference between creative and linear thinkers, and why some people can’t help but recruit others into their organized orbit. The discussion offers comic relief while shedding light on personality types and their relationship with structure.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Bert’s Holiday Organizer Encounter

• Bert shares a recent mall trip with his partner Katie and friends, which unexpectedly led them into a store dedicated solely to paper organizers. He’s shocked such specialty stores exist.
  • "I didn’t realize that there were stores dedicated solely to professional organizers. A whole store. A whole store." (01:42)
• He describes feeling overwhelmed and likens the environment to a cult gathering, as everyone seems enthralled with the products.

2. The "Cult" of Professional Organizers

• The conversation turns to how some people, like frequent show producer Tracy, are evangelists for organizing tools and try to "recruit" others.
  • "The cult thing that comes in with this is that people like producer Tracy, who is one of the most organized people I know, would be recruiting people into her fold of organization." (02:58)
• Bert suspects his friend’s "organizer repair" was just a ruse to get more people into the fold.

3. Who Actually Uses These Organizers?

• Co-host Stacy admires the discipline of people who use these systems but admits she couldn’t maintain such order in her own life.
  • "You could put anything in that store in my hands or your hands, and it won’t do us any good because you inevitably have to organize the organizer by yourself." (02:27)
• The hosts agree that having an organizer doesn’t make you organized—it’s a mindset, not just a product.

4. The "Organized" vs. The "Creative"

• Co-host Frank brings up creative brains versus organized minds, cheekily suggesting that creative types are inherently less organized.
  • "Mostly creative types and creative people are less organized. Your brain just doesn’t function in the same way as people who are super organized people." (04:20)
  • "Super, super OCD organized, like anal retentive people are much more linear and less creative. So it’s okay." (04:32)
• There’s a consensus that both approaches have their merits and pitfalls.

5. The Producer Tracy Effect

• The team reminisces about Producer Tracy’s intense organizational habits, joking about considering professional help before realizing her quirks make great radio and, by extension, their lives easier.
  • "There were years ago when producer Tracy would come on the air and we would talk about her organization and she’s so OCD over the top that I came home one day and Stacy and I started thinking about getting Tracy some professional help for it. And then I thought, why?" (05:00)
  • "If we get her help and she’s healthy, yeah, that makes our lives way, way, way, way more difficult. We’re not gonna have that." (05:14)

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Bert: "This is a cult. Okay? This is a cult ..." (01:42)
• Co-host Eddie: "If anything, we gave her a thousand bucks at Container Store. And you would have thought that we parked a new Mercedes Benz." (02:53)
• Co-host Frank: "Mostly creative types and creative people are less organized ..." (04:20)

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:00 — Bert introduces his mall trip and organizer store shock
• 02:00 — Realization of the "cult" attraction to organizers
• 02:27 — Stacy on the struggle for undisciplined minds with organizers
• 03:10 — Recruitment tactics of organizer enthusiasts
• 04:20 — Discussion on creative vs. linear, organized brains
• 05:00 — Producer Tracy’s legendary organizational quirks

---

Tone & Style

The episode is jovial, fast-paced, and packed with the Bert Show’s signature humor. It’s a playful roast of extreme organization habits, balanced with relatable reflections about personality differences. The entire team’s banter keeps things lively and authentic, making the subject accessible and amusing for anyone who’s ever debated whether to buy another planner—or why they never use the ones they buy.

---

For listeners who missed the episode:
You’ll learn why some people swear by their paper organizers and how others see the fascination as bordering on cultish. The Bert Show crew’s real talk—peppered with humor—makes this a highly relatable listen on the quirks of productivity obsession.

Transcript

[SpinQuest Announcer]

Happy birthday America. It's time to celebrate and play your favorite Las Vegas casino games by American owned spinquest.com what's better than fireworks and American pie? Hitting a blackjack in the palm of your hand and you won't lose your fingers. Over a thousand games including slots and live dealers and 30 coin packs are on sale for 10 spinquest.com buy American players.

[Bert]

For American players, Spin Quest is a free to play social casino.

[Co-host Stacy]

Visit spinquest.com for more details.

[Marshall's Advertiser]

Oh my gosh. Have you been to Marshall's lately? They have all the brand name and designer pieces you love, but without the jaw dropping price tags. Alright, so here's the. You should never have to compromise between quality and price. And at Marshall's you don't have to. Marshalls believes everyone deserves access to the good stuff and that's why their buyers hustle around the clock to make it happen for you. Visit a Marshalls store near you or shop [e-mail] the Burt Show.

[Bert]

All right, well, I want to ask you guys advice on something that I was exposed to over the holidays. And this was right after Christmas when it was Katie and myself and two of our best friends went to the mall and we went shopping, right? So we were going just hanging out, looking for sales and stuff. And then the conversation. And this is so random but of professional organizers. Like I never thought twice about people who carried. And I'm talking about the physical professional organizers that you carry in your hand, right? Not people that, not the people that do it. It's actually the physical paper organizers, you know, like, because I tend to still have a paper calendar but I don't have the full on organizer open up. Yeah. Have the sections and everything.

[Co-host Stacy]

That's what you need right there.

[Bert]

Like what you had in high school to write down your assignments in. No, this is like, this is a cult. Okay. This is a cult because we. Because my best friend said, you know what I need to get, she needed to get hers fixed. Okay. So I didn't understand what that meant. So there we went into a store that. I didn't realize that there were stores dedicated solely to professional organizers. A whole store. A whole store.

[Co-host Eddie]

Because what's it called?

[Bert]

We're Perimeter Mall.

[Co-host Eddie]

Yeah. Franklin Covey.

[Bert]

Is that where I was called? Yes, Where I was in this vortex of, you know, I don't know, obsessed women and men in there that were just so taken by everything that was on the shelves. And I'm telling you, Bert, you walk in the door and it's nothing but professional organizers from to the back.

[Co-host Stacy]

Here's where you and I differ on it. Like, I admire a store like that for people that can actually be disciplined enough to be that organized. Like, you could put anything in that store in my hands or your hands. And it won't do us any good because you inevitably have to organize the organizer by yourself.

[Bert]

Right?

[Co-host Stacy]

Which you and I don't have that skill. But like producer Tracy or the fact that there are things out there that are like that make people make our lives so much easier.

[Co-host Eddie]

If anything, we gave her a thousand bucks a container store. And you would have thought that we parked a new Mercedes Benz.

[Bert]

But let me tell you though. But see, the cult thing that comes in with this is that people like producer Tracy, who is one of the most organized people I know, would be recruiting people into her fold of organization.

[Co-host Stacy]

It can't happen. It cannot happen. Right.

[Bert]

And I'm wondering about that because we were there, okay. With my friend who was getting her organizer fixed, which I think was code for let's suck them in the store and see which one of these girls we can get. Katie and I go in there and sure enough, Katie is in the back with one of the sales reps and my best friend's girlfriend and they're going over organizers. And so Katie bought this really nice, really beautiful, like fabric covered professional organizer that's in the back of my car right now. She doesn't use it.

[Co-host Stacy]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Bert]

She doesn't even use it. But I'm fascinated. But there's a whole store. And then my friend was going to get hers fixed because they had to screw in the. I guess the screws and the binding came out or something. I don't know.

[Co-host Stacy]

I think there's a real mentality to being a good organizer. I have came to the conclusion a long time ago in watching Tracy actually, that my mind just doesn't organize things the way Tracy's does. I will never, ever, ever have that ability to do that. And you could put a thousand dollar binder in front of me organizer and it would end up just looking like this in three weeks. Because I just. I wouldn't know where to put all the papers.

[Co-host Frank]

He was holding up his is a mess. And it was like 1988.

[Co-host Eddie]

But that's fine for you and it works for me.

[Co-host Frank]

And I think mostly creative types and creative people are less organized. Your brain just doesn't function in the same way as people who are super organized people.

[Co-host Eddie]

That's the excuse.

[Co-host Frank]

Super, super OCD organized, like anal retentive people are much More linear and less creative. So it's okay.

[Bert]

Yeah, I guess I was just like. With this, I get like Container Store and stores like that, organizing your home or whatever. But just the fact that this big store at Perimeter Mall was nothing but these and thank God for them and it was packed and people were all into it and there's. It's almost like this club. Like they were in the know and they had little code words they got. I mean, each year they got. I. Anyway, I ran out of that store as fast as I could.

[Co-host Stacy]

There were years ago when producer Tracy would come on the air and we would talk about her organization and she's so OCD over the top that I came home one day and Stacy and I started thinking about getting Tracy some professional help for it. And then I thought, why? This is what she. Yeah, this is awesome for the show. If we get her help and she's healthy, yeah, that makes our lives way, way, way, way more difficult. We're not gonna have that.

[Bert]

The bird show.

[Lady Luck]

Hey guys, lady luck here. Are you going on any road trips this summer? I know I'm going to be going on a bunch of road trips and being that I'm going to be passenger Princess, I Love playing on Spinquest.com Spinquest has all of my favorite slot games. Live blackjack, live craps. Head on over to Spinquest right now and get yourself a 30 coin pack for just 10 bucks.

[Bert]

Spin Quest is a free to play social casino.

[Co-host Stacy]

Boyd where prohibited. Visit spinquest.com for more details.

[Progressive Insurance Announcer]

Insurance isn't one size fits all. That's why drivers have trusted Progressive's name your price tool for years. Just tell Progressive what you want to pay and they'll show you coverage options that fit your budget. Visit progressive.com to find a car insurance rate that works for you. Progressive Casualty Insurance company and affiliates Price and coverage match limited by state law.