The Bert Show: Vault – Battle Of The Bridesmaids Finale
Date: November 17, 2025
Host: Bert and The Bert Show Cast (Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, Melissa, et al.)
Episode Overview
This episode marks the finale of the “Battle of the Bridesmaids,” a week-long segment where Jessica, a soon-to-be bride, must choose between her two best friends, Jenny and Andrea, for the coveted Maid of Honor role. The Bert Show turned Jessica’s heart-wrenching decision into an on-air contest, having both friends answer questions about Jessica, her fiancé, and their friendship. Ultimately, the decision is heavily influenced by listener emails and the cast’s takes.
Key Highlights & Discussion Points
1. Premise and Stakes of the "Battle"
- Jessica, facing the classic dilemma of having two equally close friends, enlists The Bert Show’s help to decide who should be her Maid of Honor.
- The show sets up a friendly but competitive scenario in which Jenny and Andrea separately answer questions throughout the week.
2. Reviewing the Bridesmaids' Answers (03:29–11:31)
- Sample Questions:
- Why did Jessica choose her fiancé?
- How would you support Jessica if she gets cold feet?
- Predictions for what Jessica and her husband would fight about.
- The ultimate bachelorette party.
- Wedding reception music.
- First fight memory.
- How many times each has been a bridesmaid.
- Notable Contrasts:
On supporting Jessica with cold feet:- Jenny: “Just tell her to think about all of the amazing reasons why she is with him…” (04:07)
- Andrea: Would call Doug to reassure Jessica, emphasizing connection, or “pour her a drink.” (05:00) On party planning for the bachelorette:
- Jenny: Shopping, clubbing, hotel, and a stripper (10:00)
- Andrea: Spa weekend to relax
- Jessica prefers Jenny’s “whole shebang” approach: “I want to go and, you know, just whoop it up and flirt and, you know, have a good time.” (10:06) On predicted fight topics:
- Jenny: Kids
- Andrea: Money
- Jessica: “Our sex life, actually, I think, is what is sort of the ongoing conflict... I tend to be a little more adventurous than Doug.” (07:01)
- Wedding experience:
- Jenny’s only been a bridesmaid once but attended 25 weddings.
- Andrea has been a bridesmaid multiple times (maid of honor four times, bridesmaid twice). (12:16)
3. Jessica’s Reactions & Candid Moments (07:01–07:53)
- Jessica shares openly about her relationship: “I tend to be a little more adventurous than Doug.” (07:05)
- On sex life: "Like, he's a little more conservative than me. I...actually, I'm surprised that they didn't know that because we've had conversations about the fact that it's like this big myth that men want it more than women." (07:37)
4. Listener & Host Feedback (13:14–15:41)
- Emails from listeners heavily favor Jenny, mostly due to her sincerity, novelty (she's never been a Maid of Honor before), and perceived authenticity.
- Speculation that Andrea may have heard the questions ahead of time.
- “I chose Jenny because she was so sweet and seemed very sincere...Andrea already knew the questions...so maybe she knew the questions that were coming.” (14:21, Listener Crystal)
- Poll results: “From the emails I got, it was probably 95% to 5% in favor of Jenny.” (15:41)
5. The Reveal & Emotional Exchanges (15:41–16:44)
- Jenny is declared the listeners’ and show’s pick.
- Andrea responds graciously: “No, I just want to...I love you, Jess. And I...whatever you want to do, honey, is fine with me...I love you. And, you know, I just want the best for you.” (16:29)
- Jenny is excited but wants Jessica to be comfortable: “I hope that Jesse feels comfortable with this.” (16:57)
6. Hosts’ Closing Thoughts & Lighthearted Tangents (18:52–21:39)
- The hosts and cast reflect on why Jenny is the best fit: “Jenny’s never been the maid of honor, and she’s your oldest friend…that’s the perfect choice.” (19:01)
- Jessica agrees, especially leaning on the “never been Maid of Honor” rationale, but values Andrea’s more recent closeness. (19:13, 19:53)
- Several Price Is Right jokes and tangents lighten the tense mood.
Memorable Quotes
- Jessica on romantic conflicts:
“Our sex life, actually, I think, is what is sort of the ongoing conflict. I tend to be a little more adventurous than Doug.” (07:01) - On being adventurous:
“I want the whole shebang. You know, I want to go and, you know, just whoop it up and flirt and, you know, have a good time.” (10:06) - Listener sentiment (Crystal):
“I chose Jenny because she was so sweet and seemed very sincere...Andrea already knew the questions, maybe by listening the day before.” (14:21) - Andrea’s graciousness:
“I love you, Jess. And I...whatever you want to do, honey, is fine with me...I just want the best for you.” (16:29)
Timeline of Important Segments
| Timestamp | Segment | |--------------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:33 | Introduction to Jessica and her dilemma | | 02:20–03:05 | Explanation of “Battle of the Bridesmaids” campaign | | 03:29–11:50 | Audio montage: Bridesmaids answer wedding/relationship questions | | 12:16–12:39 | Discussion of wedding/bridesmaid experience | | 13:22–15:41 | Listener feedback and email polling explanations | | 15:41–16:44 | Announcement: Jenny is Maid of Honor; Andrea’s supportive response | | 16:49–17:29 | Jenny expresses excitement & emotional wrap-up | | 18:52–21:39 | Hosts riff, recap, and joke about “Price is Right”; Jessica reflects on final choice |
Conclusion
The “Battle of the Bridesmaids Finale” stays true to The Bert Show's “real and funny” ethos. The segment is an engaging, heartfelt, and sometimes hilarious look at friendship and wedding drama, complete with honest confessions, surprising candor (especially from Jessica), and moments of warmth between everyone involved. Ultimately, the listeners’ overwhelming vote for Jenny gave Jessica both clarity and the perfect “scapegoat” for a tough decision, while ensuring both friends will celebrate her special day together.
For more Bert Show drama, stories, and listener interaction, tune in daily or visit thebertshow.com.