Vault: Bert explains his knee injury

Summary

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The Bert Show: Vault — Bert Explains His Knee Injury

Release Date: July 3, 2026
Host & Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, and the Bert Show crew

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Episode Overview

In this candid and lighthearted roundtable episode, Bert returns to discuss his recent knee surgery in detail. The Bert Show team explores the story behind Bert’s injury, his (painful and awkward) recovery, and the impact on his daily life—sprinkled with the show’s trademark humor and camaraderie. Listeners also phone in with their own injury tales, advice, and sympathy, making for a relatable and sometimes hilarious look at the hazards of midlife sports adventures.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Bert’s Return to the Studio & Recovery Status

• [01:02] Bert is back on the show, still recovering and “slowly but surely getting back on the regular schedule.”
• Despite not taking painkillers the morning of the show, he admits, “I’m gonna be a real in about an hour.”
• Bert confirms he still has the same knee brace—no reduction in hardware from last week.

2. How (and Why) The Injury Happened

• Timeline:
  • Surgery was exactly “one Thursday ago.”
  • Bert had high hopes to be back quickly, like after his previous (left knee) surgery:

    “I’ll be in on Monday. I might be a little late. And by a little late, he meant seven days.” [01:21]

• Severity:
  • This right knee injury turned out “a lot worse.”
  • More pain, and “the meniscus was a real problem because it tore in half. So there are pins in there.” [01:35]
  • The ACL was “ripped from the femur” and the meniscus “completely cut in two… dangling between two bones.” [02:02, Bert]
• Why did this happen?
  • Bert: “Don’t start playing soccer when you’re 50.” [02:19, Unidentified Female Co-host]
  • Bert defends himself: “If you play any kind of cutting sport, you’re going to be susceptible to a knee injury.” [02:26]
  • He lists ‘cutting sports’ (volleyball, basketball, tennis, soccer) and notes golf is safer for knees. [02:32-02:42]

3. Reflecting On the Choice to Play Sports Later in Life

• Regrets or Not?
  • Bert: “I’m not bummed that I tried it… I had fun for three games.” [03:02]
  • Admits his soccer “career” is likely over: “No goals, no assists, no wins.” [03:15]
  • Family likely agrees with his retirement: “I think Stacy might have something to say about that.” [03:13]
• What About Other Sports?
  • Bert laments the loss of “physical” competition. [03:24]
  • Crew debates safe “forward motion” sports (running, biking, rowing) [03:34]
  • Jokes about trying curling:

    “If I started curling today, I could be the best in the United States in five days—because there’s only three people playing.” [04:15, Bert]

4. Everyday Life Post-Surgery

• Pain, Sleep & Mobility:
  • “It’s getting better every day. I’m taking less painkillers every day. It’s tiring… the process is just tiring.” [04:38, Bert]
  • Sleep is tough: “No, not at all. It’s uncomfortable because you have to keep your knee up.” [06:07]
• Dependency & Loss of Dignity:
  • Bert jokes, “I have not peed standing up in seven days, though… that will take the dignity right out from underneath you.” [05:38/05:44]
  • Recognizes stress on his wife: “Stacy’s not only catering to the kids now. Now she’s catering to me also… I could see she’s just at the end, you know, it’s a lot of work for her.” [05:13, Bert]
• Physical Therapy:
  • Recovery roadmap: “Four weeks in the brace or six weeks in the brace, depending on how it goes, I mean, on crutches, and then another four weeks in the brace.” [06:18]
  • Bert has already done two PT sessions and refers to his physical therapist as “Diablo”:

    “I already refer to him as Diablo to my w… uh.” [07:33, Bert]

5. Listener Call-Ins & Shared Stories

• Encouragement and Advice:
  • Jeannie calls to share her son’s near-identical football injury (“kneecap also popped in half!”) and quick PT tips: “Lightweight leg extension and leg curls on a machine… you’ll recover a lot quicker.” [06:43 & 07:00]
  • Bert responds, “My physical therapist wanted me in the day after the surgery… they’re already working on it.” [07:11]
• Perspective & Genetics:
  • Monya calls to say sometimes, “Really? Nothing [prevents these kinds of injuries]. When I was like, 17, 18… both of my meniscus ripped… not even sports.” [07:51]
  • Bert concludes, “There are some people that are just more prone to this kind of thing.” [08:28]
• Appreciating It Could Be Worse:
  • Bert shares a DC anecdote:

    “The host of the show, his wife went out inline skating one day… she fell backwards and she busted both legs and both wrists… had to bring a nurse in to wipe her butt…” [08:39]

6. Team Cheers & Outlook

• The crew is glad to have Bert partially back and encourages his “hobbling in a little earlier every day.”
• Bert expresses hopefulness: “Hopefully a little earlier and then I’ll be able to be back in the driver’s seat.” [09:26]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I didn’t take a painkiller this morning, so I’m gonna be a real in about an hour.” — Bert [01:08]
• “Don’t start playing soccer when you’re 50.” — Unidentified Female Co-host [02:19]
• “If I started curling today, I could be the best in the United States in five days—because there’s only three people playing.” — Bert [04:15]
• “I have not peed standing up in seven days, though… that will take the dignity right out from underneath you.” — Bert [05:38/05:44]
• “No pain, no gain.” — Unidentified Female Co-host [07:44]
• “There are some people that are just more prone to this kind of thing than other people are.” — Bert [08:28]
• “One leg is nothing compared to that…” — Bert, sharing the inline skating disaster story [08:59]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:06 – Bert’s first day back; joking about painkillers
• 01:35 – Details on severity of his knee injury
• 02:32 – What makes a ‘cutting sport’ dangerous
• 03:02 – Bert’s attitude on post-40 sports, “not bummed”
• 04:15 – Curling as a safe new sport (humorous tangent)
• 05:38 – Admitting the awkwardness of post-surgery bathroom habits
• 05:13 & 06:13 – Impact on family and marriage dynamics
• 07:00 – 07:44 – Listener advice and Bert’s physical therapy experiences
• 07:51 – 08:35 – Callers discuss how injuries can happen, even outside of sports
• 08:39 – 09:16 – A cautionary tale about much worse injuries
• 09:26 – Bert’s hopeful return to full participation

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Summary & Tone

The episode mixes practical, relatable advice with the show’s classic banter—poking fun at Bert’s situation but also offering genuine sympathy. Listeners are reminded that life’s everyday choices (especially midlife sports) come with new risks but also plenty of good stories. The community feel of the show shines, with callers chiming in to commiserate, advise, and laugh together. Bert’s honesty about pain, frustration, and the awkward realities of recovery adds humor and heart to his ordeal.

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Transcript

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[Unidentified Female Host]

What's up? Hey.

[Bert]

Slowly but surely getting back on the regular schedule.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

You look almost coherent and stuff.

[Bert]

Yeah, I didn't take a painkiller this morning, so I'm gonna be a real in about an hour.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

It looks like you have less apparatus on it than you've had last week.

[Bert]

I think it's about the same, right?

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

I had this thing on, it's the

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

same brace, but I mean it seems like it was rat more. Burt, by the way, had knee surgery not last Thursday, a week ago Thursday, and proudly declared I'll be in on Monday. I might be a little late. And by a little late, he meant seven days.

[Bert]

Well, I was basing it on the first knee surgery, the left one, and I can't even remember how many days I took off for that one. But this knee, the right knee, turned out to be a lot worse than the left one. And the pain on this one has just been so much more. I don't know if I'm just getting softer as I get older or Tom was saying that the meniscus was a real problem because it tore in half. So there are pins in there. And when do you repeat that sentence?

[Unidentified Male Commentator 2]

Right now, because I have no idea what you just said. I don't want to.

[Bert]

So at the end of the day, this one was worse because the ACL was ripped from the femur and the meniscus, Wendy just completely cut in two like this and was dangling between two bones just like this.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Can you tell everybody how to avoid this surgery?

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Yeah, don't start playing soccer when you're 50.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Not 50.

[Jeannie]

Sorry.

[Bert]

No, not really. I mean, if you play any kind of cutting sport, you're going to be susceptible to a knee injury.

[Unidentified Female Host]

What's a cutting sport?

[Bert]

You know, like a volleyball, basketball, tennis, where the soccer side facade.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Yeah.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Okay.

[Bert]

You know, chances are fairly good if you're playing golf. You got a better chance of not doing this.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Doing okay. Okay.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Yeah. The knees don't seem to really be built for side to side.

[Bert]

No, not really.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Yeah.

[Bert]

Now, the way the knee is built, it's so complicated in there and so many things can go wrong. But some people go their whole lives playing soccer and never have an injury, which impresses me to no end.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Well, some people start playing soccer at age 5. You started playing at over 40, and that's kind of.

[Bert]

And even now I'm not bummed that I tried it, you know, I mean, what are you going to do? I mean, it looked like it was going to be fun, and I had fun for three games.

[Unidentified Female Host]

You're not going back, though, are you?

[Bert]

I'm pretty sure I'm not going back.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Retired.

[Unidentified Female Host]

I think Stacy might have something to say about that.

[Bert]

I think it was a short, fruitless career. 03. No goals, no assists, no wins.

[Unidentified Male Commentator 2]

What about any sports then? Are you going to go back to sports in general?

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Yeah.

[Bert]

Melissa and I were talking about this on Saturday night. I don't know what to go and play. The thing about soccer that was so cool is that it was physical, you know, and you could really get beat up and do some beating up, too.

[Jeannie]

And.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Well, Burr likes competition. I keep telling them that because Katie's had this surgery and one of the things that she had to change was forward motion. Sports with forward. So she can still run, she can still bike, she, you know, anything. But she can't do soccer. Shouldn't be doing tennis, even though we do tennis a little bit. But I mean, there's competitive sports out there where you just. It's just forward motion and your knee will be fine.

[Unidentified Female Host]

How about like rowing? Because then you just sit and then use your arms.

[Bert]

Where am I gonna go? Chattahoochee to do competitive rowing?

[Unidentified Female Host]

Yeah. I mean, that would keep you off crutches.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Hey, I'm not. Look, I'm not buying into this nonsense

[Unidentified Male Commentator 2]

that you guys have been saying curling.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

But curling does sound like a safe opt.

[Bert]

And if I started curling today, I could be the best in the United States in five days.

[Unidentified Female Traveler]

Hell, yeah.

[Bert]

Because there's only three people playing.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

And the good thing is if you do damage your knee all you'd have to do is kneel down and you're icing it.

[Bert]

And you would have to make up such a great excuse, because if you jacked up your knee curling, you'd have to make up a million different excuses, really, what happened.

[Unidentified Female Host]

It would have to be. You got attacked.

[Bert]

It's getting better every day. And I'm taking less painkillers every day. It's tiring. Like, I don't think people know the process is just tiring because you have

[Unidentified Male Commentator 2]

to stay off of it for, what, six weeks?

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

So what did you do this weekend? Were you even able to leave the house on that nice Saturday or anything?

[Bert]

Saturday night, Melissa and I went up to the bidet's. The BBA family.

[Bretzky]

Right.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

That's right.

[Bert]

For dinner. But I was so beat at the end of that thing. And outside of that, seriously, Jeff, it's been same position on the couch for seven days, just watching basketball, working on the computer.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Is your marriage stronger than ever, or is one of you calling Evan poor little thing?

[Bert]

Stacy's not only catering to the kids now. Now she's catering to me also. And I could see she's just at the end, you know, it's a lot of work for her, so I'm. I'm glad I'm to a point where I can start getting back to work. It's probably best for the whole family.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

And you got the diaper off, so that's cool.

[Bert]

The diaper?

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Yeah. Didn't you have to wear a diaper for your first three days on the couch?

[Bert]

You dreamt that.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Yeah, he just wears that. That's just at the bars. That's not. When he. That's not anything. That was, you know, drinking nights.

[Bert]

I have not peed standing up in seven days, though.

[Unidentified Male Commentator 2]

Save that.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Yeah,

[Bert]

that will take the dignity right out from underneath you.

[Jeannie]

Yeah.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

So you're not more sympathetic to those that sit and pee?

[Bert]

No, it would definitely not be an option for me. It really takes the manhood right away from you.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

That is. Yeah, that's awkward.

[Bert]

So that's where it's at, man. I mean, every day I'm gonna try to come in a little bit earlier and just try to get back into the swing of things.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

So are you sleeping through the night?

[Bert]

No, no, not at all. It's uncomfortable because you have to keep your knee up.

[Monya]

So.

[Bert]

Yeah, I mean, it is what it is at this point.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Yeah, man.

[Unidentified Female Host]

What's the countdown till this is done?

[Bert]

They said four weeks in the brace or six weeks in the brace, depending on how it goes, I mean, on crutches, and then another four weeks in the brace. I can't put any pressure on it whatsoever.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Whoa.

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Well, for whatever reason, everybody's calling up not to say welcome back, but to make you feel better about the injury you have.

[Bert]

Oh, good.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Okay.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Wendy, you may want to go for a walk.

[Bert]

Oh, these are fun.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Okay.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Hey, Jeannie.

[Jeannie]

Good morning, everyone.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

What's going on?

[Jeannie]

Just want to tell Bert that my son had the same injury from playing football, except his kneecap also popped in half. So not only did he have that.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Popped in half.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Wow. Thanks for repeating. Wow.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Hey, Brittany, what's going on?

[Jeannie]

Oh, not much. Just wanted to let you know, if you want to do lightweight leg extension and leg curls on a machine, it'll totally get your hamstrings and your quads stronger and you'll recover a lot quicker.

[Bert]

Yeah, I've already gone to physical therapy a couple of times. They don't want you laying up on this thing at all. In fact, my physical therapist wanted me in the day after the surgery, and I said I'll wait till Monday. So I've seen him twice already, but they're already working on it.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Who are you going to hate more, Dolvett or your physical therapist?

[Bert]

It will be Mark Wentworth. My physical therapist.

[Jeannie]

Okay.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

First and last name.

[Bert]

I already refer to him as Diablo to my w. Uh.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Oh.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Bert famously hates any trainer he has because they try to hurt him.

[Jeannie]

Right.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Knowing that's their job. Right?

[Bert]

Yeah.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

No pain, no gain. Hey, Moyne, is Monya, right? That's what I was about to say.

[Monya]

Yeah, exactly. Well, I just wanted to say I think either Jen or Melissa asked what you can do to prevent from this. Really? Nothing. When I was like, 17, 18, within a matter of a year and a half, I had both of my meniscus ripped, like Bert was saying. And I wasn't playing any football. In fact, one time I tried to get on like a step ladder, try to take two steps at the same time. It ripped. The second time, I was just turning to the left and it ripped. So it was not even sports. It was just regular day to day things. And I don't think you can do anything. Either it rips or it doesn't.

[Bert]

Yeah, there are some people that are just more prone to this kind of thing than other people are.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

Well, it's good to know that we're all together in this, that we all can rip our meniscus too, you know,

[Unidentified Female Traveler]

it's been such a hassle.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Everybody rip your meniscus.

[Bert]

It's been such a hassle just hobbling on one leg that I remember the other day when I was working in Washington D.C. the host of the show, his wife went out and tried inline skating one day with their kids. And the very first time she went out, she fell backwards and she busted both legs and both wrists.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Oh God.

[Bert]

So for six months she couldn't do anything and that was her very first time trying inline skating. So one leg is nothing compared to that. I mean, she literally. They had to bring a nurse in to wipe her butt to do everything.

[Unidentified Female Host]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Unidentified Male Commentator]

I'd like to wipe my own butt from now on.

[Unidentified Female Host]

Save that horrible.

[Unidentified Female Co-host]

Well, anyways, good to have you back. Even if it's only for half the show. It's good that you're starting to hobble every day.

[Bert]

Hopefully a little earlier and then I'll be able to be back in the driver's seat. Hey, the bird show.

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