Vault: Bert Show Separate Los Angeles Adventures

Summary

The Bert Show — Vault: Bert Show Separate Los Angeles Adventures

Date: August 10, 2026
Host(s): The Bert Show Cast (Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, et al.)

---

Overview

In this episode, the Bert Show cast reminisces about their split adventures while visiting Los Angeles. Half the team attended an exclusive preview of a new TV show, while the others lunched at the famed—but expensive—Ivy restaurant. The conversation is a blend of celebrity-spotting nostalgia, LA’s high prices, and observations about the impact of current events (such as a Gulf oil spill) on seafood choices. The tone is playful, self-aware, and sprinkled with the group's signature wit and camaraderie.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Group Splits for Different LA Experiences

[00:48]

• The cast had to divide up for separate events, which one member describes as "sad."
• Wendy and Jen attended a taping of a new Fox TV show, while Bert, Jeff, Melissa, and Frankie visited The Ivy for lunch.

---

2. TV Show Preview: The Good Guys

[00:56–01:30]

• Wendy and Jen previewed The Good Guys, starring Colin Hanks (Tom Hanks’s son).
  • Wendy notes, “He does have the mannerisms of his dad just a tiny bit. But he’s really good. I mean, in his own, you know, in his own right.” [00:59]
  • The show is described as a “comedy cop show” with both action and humor. [01:28]
• The challenge of living up to a famous parent is discussed, especially as an actor.
  • Bert: “That’s tough to be the son of Tom Hanks, man. That’s like being the son of, like, Bob Dylan, you know?” [01:12]

---

3. Lunch at The Ivy: Iconic, Expensive, and Full of Celebrity Vibes

[01:38–03:36]

• Bert, Jeff, Melissa, and Frankie dined at The Ivy—a legendary LA spot formerly known for A-list celebrity sightings.

  • Jeff: “We tipped two and a half. 35 bucks.” [01:49]
  • Frankie’s drink alone cost $27.95, provoking collective disbelief. [01:57–02:13]
  • Bert explains The Ivy’s status: “At any given day, you could see dozens and dozens and dozens of paparazzi... But it really hasn’t been that place for a couple of years...But it’s such an institution in LA that we had to go check it out.” [02:13]

• The group notes that everyone in the restaurant seems to be eyeing everyone else, trying to spot celebrities.

  • “Everybody thinks everybody else is a celebrity...we were doing the same thing.” [02:45]

• The bill was eye-poppingly high despite only two having cocktails: “It was still a $200 bill.” [03:07]

• Menu items like a Caesar salad or seafood sandwich each cost about $30, leading to comments about tourists and celebrities being the likely customer base who’d accept those prices. [03:12–03:19]

---

4. Seafood Choices Tied to the Gulf Oil Spill

[03:36–05:12]

• Melissa shares her decision to exclusively eat seafood while in LA, referencing difficulties sourcing it back east due to the ongoing Gulf oil spill.
  • “So I made the decision, look, I don’t know how it’s going to be for restaurants in the Southeast and how long...So I’m like, while I’m out here, all I’m getting is seafood.” [04:13]
• The group lightly jokes about her principled stance.
  • Bert (humorously comparing their own activism): “I’m so impressed with the political stands you take on stuff. Like I’m signing a petition to make sure Friday Night Lights doesn’t go anywhere... and you’re only eating seafood because of what’s happening.” [04:34]
• Melissa, showing classic Bert Show humility and humor:
  • “Don’t forget I’m a Trekkie, so I do have my balance.” [04:47]
• They connect the high Ivy prices (“Jeff’s chicken salad was $35”) to the oil spill, jokingly blaming it for inflated costs. [05:12]

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Colin Hanks:
  Wendy: “He does have the mannerisms of his dad just a tiny bit... but he’s really good. I mean, in his own right.” [00:59]

• The Ivy’s Price Shock:
  Jeff: “We tipped two and a half. 35 bucks.” [01:49]
  Bert: “His drink was $30.” [02:00]

• On The Ivy’s Celebrity Culture:
  Bert: “At any given day, you could see dozens and dozens and dozens of paparazzi out at the Ivy... B and C listers... But it’s such an institution in LA that we had to go check it out.” [02:13]
  Frankie: “Everybody thinks everybody else is a celebrity... we were doing the same thing.” [02:45]

• On LA Seafood & the Gulf Spill:
  Melissa: “So I’m like, while I’m out here, all I’m getting is seafood.” [04:13]
  Bert: “I’m so impressed with like the stands and the political stands and stuff that you take on stuff. I’m online, like signing a petition to make sure that Friday Night Lights doesn’t go anywhere next year. And you’re like only eating seafood because of what’s happening.” [04:34]

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:48] — Show begins, team splits for LA adventures
• [00:56–01:30] — Wendy & Jen at The Good Guys TV preview
• [01:38–03:36] — The Ivy lunch: celebrity culture & expensive meals
• [03:36–05:12] — Melissa's seafood “protest” and Gulf oil spill discussion

---

Episode Tone & Takeaways

The cast’s conversation is effortless and comedic, peppered with personal anecdotes, group banter, and light social commentary. The LA adventures highlight the contrast between celebrity city glamour and the reality of inflated prices and changing industry landscapes, all filtered through the show’s trademark wit.

---

This summary omits ads, show intros/outros, and focuses only on the main content and personalities featured in the episode.

Transcript

[A]

Ryan Seacrest here. So every great barbecue takes a little patience. And while the food does its thing, you can enjoy a little Chumba Casino. The perfect recipe. Chumba Casino. Always good to have you back.

[B]

No purchase necessary. VGW group void or prohibited by law. CTCS 21 sponsored by Chumba Casino.

[C]

Tyler Redick here from 2311 Racing. The rush of racing. Nothing beats it, but Chumba Casino comes close. Chumba's got fast spins, fun games, daily bonuses, and all the action you can handle. Now that's a ride. Ready to hit the throttle. Get in the driver's seat and head to chumbacasino.com let's Chumba.

[B]

Sponsored by Chumba Casino. No purchase necessary. VGW Group Void where prohibited by law 21 +, terms and conditions apply.

[A]

This is the Bird Show.

[D]

We had to split up as a team yesterday, and it was sad, but Wendy and Jen went to go see a new Fox TV show, correct?

[E]

Yes. It's called the Good Guys. And it actually stars Colin Hanks, who's Tom Hanks son. It's really, really fun to watch him on camera because he does have the mannerisms of his dad just a tiny bit. But he's really good. I mean, in his own, you know, in his own right. He really is very talented.

[D]

That's tough to be the son of Tom Hanks, man. That's like being the son of, like, Bob Dylan, you know? Like, I think if I'm that dude, I do something entirely different than act. But yeah, he's doing okay.

[E]

Yeah, he does a really great job on the show. It's a cop show and. And it's got all kinds of action, but it's actually really funny.

[F]

Like, I think comedy cop show.

[E]

Comedy cop show.

[D]

So was there anything special about the place that you went to see? It was like a big exclusive theater or anything?

[E]

No, it was in the. It's in the. The place where we are. It's just in that other room over there.

[D]

Okay.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

All right, cool. And then Jeff and Melissa and our engineer Frankie here and I all went to the Ivy yesterday.

[G]

Did you see my. See my tweet to see how much lunch for the four of us cost?

[D]

No. How much was it?

[A]

How much was it?

[G]

We tipped two and a half. 35 bucks.

[D]

Yeah, man.

[A]

What?

[F]

Ridiculous.

[G]

Frankie's fault.

[E]

Ridiculous. How much was like an entree?

[G]

Well, I'll tell you, Frankie's drink was 27.95.

[D]

What was in that drink? Seriously? It was 30 bucks. His drink was $30.

[E]

Thirty dollar drink.

[F]

It was. What was It. That was. It was a tequila. And. But what was the. It was kumquat tequila in tequila.

[D]

30 bucks for this drink. And we have to establish that the. The Ivy here in la, at least back in the day, was like the place that all the celebrities used to hang out at. And at any given day, you could see dozens and dozens and dozens of paparazzi out at the Ivy. Well, it really hasn't been that place for a couple of years. So from time to time, you'll see like B and C list celebrities out there because some paparazzi still hang out. But the A listers don't go any. Go there anymore. But it's such an institution in LA that we had to go check it out. And that's when we got the $30 drink, man.

[F]

And the fascinating thing is everybody thinks everybody else is a celebrity because like Bert said, it's B and C listers that go. So when we walked in, everybody was looking to turn to see, do I know them?

[E]

Do I know who are they on a reality show? Who's that guy?

[D]

It's a total head.

[F]

Yeah. And then we sat down, and then we were doing the same thing to everybody that else that walked up. So same thing. But it is. I mean, only two of us had cocktails of the four of us, and it was still. Still a 200 bill.

[D]

It's crazy.

[E]

That's insane. The price, like a 40 salad or something.

[G]

Yeah, I had a chicken Caesar that was 30 bucks.

[E]

You're kidding.

[F]

My sandwich, my sandwiches, seafood sandwich is like $30.

[E]

I mean, I guess they know that it's either going to be celebrities who don't care or tourists who don. Care who are going to come in there and spend the money.

[D]

Right.

[E]

Wow, that's crazy.

[D]

So what'd you get yesterday?

[F]

I got like this soft crab sandwich with fries, and it was 27.95.

[D]

It's nuts.

[F]

Ridiculous.

[D]

Melissa told us that she's only eating seafood in la.

[E]

Why?

[F]

Well, just before we left to come out here, Katie and I had gone to a restaurant, I cannot remember where we were in Atlanta for it, but we had asked for, you know, a seafood dish on the menu, and they said, I'm sorry, we don't have it because of the Gulf, we're not getting it shipped in. And so that was the first time we'd been denied food right before we came out here. So I was hanging out at Phil's Cafe here in la. I don't know what part of town it's in with a buddy of Mine on Saturday night. And when I looked at the menu, the first thing I thought is, you know what? While I'm out here. Because at first I thought, well, I'm not going to order the seafood, you know, any seafood. And I thought, wait a second, I'm on the Pacific coast. I'm clear out here. So I made the decision, Look, I don't know how it's going to be for restaurants in the Southeast and how long it's going. You know, all this, the fishery and all the Gulf spill and everything. So I'm like, while I'm out here, all I'm getting is seafood.

[E]

Well, and it. And we'll probably be able to get it. It'll just be more expensive cuz it'll have to be shipped from other places. Such a good point.

[D]

I'm so impressed with like the stands and the political stands and stuff that you take on. Stuff. I'm online, like signing a petition to make sure that Friday Night Lights doesn't go anywhere next year. And you're like only eating seafood because of what's happening.

[F]

Don't forget I'm a Trekkie, so I do have my balance.

[G]

But.

[F]

But no, it was more of just the. Was an unconscious thought that came forward and I thought, you know what, I'm just gonna. I just don't know what it's gonna be like if this spill continues and continues and continues. It's just like, you know, I'm on the Pacific coast. I don't have to worry about that. I don't have to worry about the fish here. So I've just made a conscious effort to do that just in case we get back home and it's, you know, not as prevalent.

[D]

So maybe because of what's going on in the Gulf is the reason why. Jeff's chicken salad was 35, right?

[F]

Blame it on the oil spill.

[G]

Chicken in the sea.

[D]

Oh no. This is the BIR.

[H]

Bubba Wallace here from 2311 racing on the track. My car's look is everything. But today I'm talking about more than just paint schemes. I'm talking about my favorite games at Chumba Casino. Check out exclusives like Stampede Fury and my own King Croc theory. It's just as wild as my car looked in Texas. With over 200 games and new ones weekly play for free at chumbacasino.com let's Chumba.

[B]

Sponsored by Chumba Casino. No purchase necessary. VGW Group Fort Worth prohibited by law. 21 terms and conditions apply.